#hate if you want just know that we're very very used to it already
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My fears and things I do NOT want to see in BJ3:
These are some elements and ideas I do not want to see in BJ3. Some ideas in here I simply want to disappear entirely from the ether of possibility π
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Here's the link to my previous post, about the things I DO want to get in BJ3.
Let's see here:
I'll start with Charles Deetz. I do NOT want to be subjected to the gurgling, sputtering noises he makes when he talks with no head again π
, plus his character's story is super over now. So... Let's keep him off my screen. He took the Soul Train. Bye... Delia could have told him it was okay to leave before her; we only need to see Delia in BJ3.
Astrid still hating Lydia. They can still have friction, but Astrid being all moody teenager again maybe would get tiresome. (It'd be cool if there's a time skip and Astrid is a little older now. I've mentioned before how I think starting BJ3 with a time skip would be beneficial to set up endgame Beetlebabes.)
One of the biggest things I do NOT want at ALL is Lydia getting rid of Betelgeuse forever... Or getting him out of her life or something like that. She can start the movie seeking to do just that (and I think that'd be a very realistic way to start the film, with Lydia trying to find a way to get him out of her life for good), but then her character can and should evolve to want the contrary through the film.
Lydia marrying some random new character at the end. Literally nightmare material right there. And "ew" factor that'd make me hate the movie lol. She could start the film with some random new character as a love interest, but... that guy better be gone by the end. Actually, it'd be interesting if she did have a rando love interest at some point and rejected him, realizing she doesn't want him, because he is everything Betelgeuse is not. ;)
Betelgeuse sacrificing himself for Lydia, ending up permanently gone or dead-dead, resulting in Lydia marrying some random new character at the end and that being a "happy ending". (Nooo get away from here with that energy π).
Lydia's happy ending being getting rid of Betelgeuse and marrying a rando new character. Triple ew. Can you tell I really hate any version of this idea?
Astrid hating Betelgeuse. lol She can start the film hating him, and then evolve to love and accept him as her stepfather and her mom's new love.
While we're at it, Betelgeuse hating Astrid. He could start the film frustrated with her or whatever, but he better adore his new stepdaughter by the end. Or else. π€ Tbh I think he already loves her just because she's Lydia's child, but she did point out the contract being null and void. Will he have some resentment or sadness? We'll have to see. I think Beej is easy going though; he may not give a shit and still adore her anyway lol.
Betelgeuse returning with Delores or having another random new love interest. EW no no no no. Please take that energy away from me and hide this evil thought bubble from Tim Burton's head. *Burns a bundle of white sage to purify the air around this one*.
Betelgeuse giving up on Lydia and letting her go so she can go "be happy" with some random new love interest... NO no no no... Please nope.
Lydia being endgame with Richard in the afterlife. This would be so random, considering Lydia said their relationship was over way before his accident, so I don't know why this one even crossed my mind, but it did because maybe I'm a little paranoid with my ships, I guess. lol
And finally, my BIGGEST FEAR right here: Betelgeuse being revealed as a true trickster demon that never cared about Lydia at all π¨. Like, Betelgeuse having just played Lydia to get his way in the end. I would probably ignore Tim Burton exists if they go that route, which lucky for us all will NEVER ever happen. Tim clearly loves Beetlejuice and Lydia, not just as individual characters, but also as a couple (just listen to him talking about them in this clip, about choosing the McArthur Park song; you can feel his fondness for these characters in his voice), and so does Michael and Winona; they would never allow a script with that outcome.
Oh! Added after I thought I was finished with this post... This nightmarish idea π¨π¨: Betelgeuse having had a son in the past and his descendant(s) being a part of the plot. AAHH! Get that hellish thought away from meeee. Why was I haunted by this one out of nowhere?! Get that horrible thought away from me (sorry to anyone who thinks this one is cool. This is the stuff of NIGHTMARES to me π. Like, franchise-ruining stuff right here, tbh).
So this is it! You can read my previous post here. Hopefully these are just irrational fears. lol Some of these I can forgive (like Charles being in the movie, and maybe even Lydia having a different love interest for part of the movie, as long as it's not the endgame). But there are some of these that would honestly ruin the movie for me (like Betelgeuse having a son in the past, or Betelgeuse being truly evil and having never truly cared about Lydia, or Lydia's happy ending being getting rid of Betelgeuse forever. Those three are just my worst fears, tbh. Also wouldn't forgive Betelgeuse ending up with Delores, but that one is a pretty ridiculous idea, tbh).
*Grabs that bundle of white sage again for good measure. May none of these happen.*
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Aang and Korra Both Have Dissociative Identity Disorders
There. I said it.
As a person with DID/OSDD forced to grit their teeth through yet another stigmatizing movie release (fuck you for "Split", Netflix), my Team and I are officially hijacking something most of you love: the Avatar: The Last Airbender franchise.
In the ATLA and LOK universes, Dissociative Identity Disorder and its similar diagnoses are the key to ultimate spiritual power.
Aang, Korra, and all of the canonical Avatars are only special in the ATLA and LOK universe because they have traumagenic alter identities that present themselves as the past lives of the existing Avatar, and it's actually kind of agonizingly obvious if you have DID/OSDD and watch the shows carefully. Aang especially is the most symptomatic of "classic" DID symptoms, so I'll focus mostly on him:
Point 1: It's canon that Aang has experienced deep psychological trauma at a young age. DID/OSDD usually begins to take shape in very young children that have suffered severe psychological trauma that often involves a feeling of extreme helplessness, powerlessness, and/or isolation (however, the symptoms and the alter identities can stay hidden or unnoticed well into adulthood; I didn't even know about my own symptoms until I was 28 and honestly thought it was Schizophrenia first).
Aang is canonically othered by his peers - not maliciously or intentionally, but it's actually pretty common for neurotypicals to eventually subconsciously notice things and respond with caution if they can't understand why someone Feels A Little Different - among the Air Nomads for learning at too young an age than average that he is, in fact, the Avatar. Even Gyatso treats him differently for it, and in the live action version, Aang even admits to feeling like he doesn't quite fit with his own community prior to learning he's the Avatar, and that his peers were able to pick up on it.
The live action version also adds to the headcanon of Aang having DID by the fact that he's shown as sometimes overwhelming and accidentally harming or endangering his friends and peers in combat practice, when he exerts more strength or skill than even he knew he could manifest if he gets too swept up in the moment. That strength/skill immediately retracts back into Aang when he realizes how little control over it he has and overdoes it with someone, as though his System realized they'd gotten overzealous and showed too much of themselves in Aang and compromised his external relationships.
He has skills that he can't quite account for, unsettling other Airbenders his age that don't also know he's the Avatar, and while Aang is friendly and largely liked by those around him - even having an extensive network of international friends in a world with no telecommunication infrastructure - his community itself struggles to fully embrace him, and are annihilated by the Fire Nation when Aang isn't around to let the Avatar State/his System of alter personalities to protect the people he loves, driving the trauma deeper, and making him even more easily triggered into the Avatar State after fully realizing he and his system couldn't save the people they loved, causing Aang to be even more easily triggered into switching into it again when the friends he makes later are in danger.
Point 2: The Avatar usually dissociates/blacks out when entering and leaving the Avatar State, with fragmented or no memories from the Avatar State itself until they've mastered it. Aang and Korra both demonstrate a degree of recall depending upon the situation they entered the Avatar State for. At the beginning of ATLA and LOK, it's obvious in both that Aang and Korra have very little conscious control over the Avatar State (aka switching personalities to one or more that can handle a situation they feel they can't without them), and it's almost always triggered by danger or life-threatening situations.
Aang first enters the Avatar State when he and Appa are lost in the storm at sea, where not only is his life in peril, but so is Appa's. There's no evidence to suggest that Aang's transition into the Avatar State to protect himself and Appa from the storm is a willful one; he is very visibly sinking and losing the fight to stay conscious when he falls into the water with Appa, and it's only when his consciousness starts to fully slip into "unconscious" that the Avatar State self-initiates.
For those of us with Systems that work closely with us and can recognize what's going on around us without being dissociated, a common trigger for switching is immediate physical danger to the individual and/or who and what they love or care for. However, to protect themselves and the knowledge of their existence, the System/Alters themselves can strategically choose when and where to take control that will call the least amount of attention to them, especially if they're not ready for their host (Aang or Korra) to know about them.
A good compromise that happens a lot with DID/OSDD is for a System or individual alter to take control when the host personality is already losing consciousness or is already in a mental state where they're not likely to remember very much of what's happening. When Aang falls into the ocean during the storm and starts to lose consciousness underwater, it's the perfect window for his System to surge forward without his knowledge or need for his approval, and get him and Appa into a safe state they refuse to let down until they know it's safe to let go. In Aang's case, being trapped in the iceberg prevented his System from knowing whether it was safe, until Katara's waterbending proved that someone was outside of the iceberg that might be able to help. Once the Avatar State lets go and Aang's System retreats back into its "hiding" state, he has absolutely no memory of what happened, and no sense of the passage of time.
Point 3: None of Aang's alters/past lives seem to be aware that they're the reason Aang was lost for 100 years while simultaneously being able to tell him things he should not be able to know. Especially in the live action version, when Aang has his first formal meeting with Avatar Kyoshi in the Spirit World/Avatar State, Kyoshi and Aang's other dominant alter, Avatar Roku, don't seem to fully acknowledge that it was the choice of the other Avatars/Alters to dissociate Aang and keep him safe in the iceberg for an entire century. Kyoshi is visibly angry and frustrated with Aang for "taking so long", without an apparent idea of the full context of why Aang was "gone" for so long. She demonstrates a tenuous awareness of major events in time - both past and future - but not so much what's going on in the present aside from what's presenting the greatest risk to Aang's safety.
The other Avatars, or alters, just don't seem fully aware of the consequences of their taking Aang's ability to call the shots away while he's dissociated. Instead, they verbalize Aang's own internalized guilt: "Where were you?" "You should've been there," "You ran away," and so on, until Aang starts to stick up for himself (read: forgive himself) to them. Once he begins telling his past lives that his 100-year-long absence wasn't his fault and he still has hope for saving the world, his past lives become a lot more pliable and eager to help.
When Aang begins to turn to his Avatar State and its associated personalities as a powerful tool for protecting himself and others, and therefore begins to trust his past lives enough to reach out to them and communicate with them more, the more the past lives/alters demonstrate awareness of the world outside of Aang and compassion for the position he's in. Their interactions become much more productive and relaxed the more Aang trusts them, and the more they trust Aang to turn to them for help in dire circumstances. It's almost as if Aang has to accept them as part of himself before they can actively participate in his world, or else they can't function properly at all. This mindset is practically proven in the show's canon when Avatar Roku, Bumi, and other advice-giving characters in Aang's life actively begin encouraging Aang to lean into it and learn to control it so all of his past lives can emerge as one force when he decides he needs them.
Point 4: When it really matters, the past lives/alters set aside their own impulses in order to honor Aang's beliefs, and Aang suffers psychologically if they don't. With the final battle against Ozai, especially in the original series, even Aang's own alters push him to kill Ozai as the only way of stopping the Fire Nation from continuing to conquer and destroy the world. Even Roku reluctantly encourages Aang to kill Ozai, because it's the only obvious way of eliminating Ozai and ending the war. Kyoshi, too, also advises him to kill Ozai, until Aang begins to desperately seek out all of his past lives for suggestions for any other way of stopping the war without compromising his beliefs as a pacifist.
In moments where Aang is triggered into the Avatar State and can't control himself or the other Avatars, their impulses are usually to use lethally-destructive force, save for if a particular Avatar is needed for a particular situation (See: the Kyoshi Island arc in the original series when Aang is put on trial for Kyoshi's actions). Aang violently resists this, breaking down or flagellating himself if he realizes the Avatar State has gotten someone hurt or otherwise put in real danger, continuously citing his belief in passivity as a better alternative to resolving problems through violence. As far as we know, Aang is the only one of the Avatars to have experienced the trauma of surviving a successful genocide, and one of the greatest points of contention between Aang and his other lives/alters is that they struggle to empathize with him on their own. It's only when Aang faces down Ozai himself, in that final moment where he has Ozai's life literally under his thumb, that Aang experiences a stroke of his own inspiration and uses the combined power of his alters to take Ozai's bending away and render him a regular, common person.
In other words, Aang compromised with his alters/past lives to find a resolution that satisfied them all, and finally cemented what Aang's truest needs were to his past lives/alters, and attaining harmony with them.
In summation: Aang especially could easily be seen as a poster child and icon for DID/OSDD and how it can actually present and behave, and I personally choose to believe that the Avatar universe itself is one where DID/OSDD is seen as a profound gift to be celebrated and revered rather than a true crime docuseries waiting to happen at the moment of diagnosis.
#did/osdd#actual did/osdd#atla#atla aang#live action atla#atla la spoilers#legend of korra#lok#hate if you want just know that we're very very used to it already
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thinking about kab and the thing about her i think is she knows just enough to keep herself safe Generally but not enough to really predict what would happen should something more... complicated??? unforeseen??? idk whats the right word to use but something not covered by someones reputation and/or vids happen, believe it or not this also affects her view of clownpierce (we'll get to that)
for example, mapicc has a reputation for being an violent, angry, & impulsive guy and nothing else which makes sense but is incredibly surface level and something that only really works if you dont have a lot of experience working with him
another is reddoons, his betrayal after the base incident while shocking is not unforeseen but his reputation as being a guy whos seen as being a reasonable person whos fairly loyal to his team made it seem like something he wouldnt do even tho it absolutely is
regarding how it affects her view of clown, since he isnt perfectly aligned with his reputation she instead pivots in the complete opposite direction and forgiving basically every crime he does even tho hes something much more mild and complicated than either his reputation or her view of him will ever be (think madonna-whore complex which is especially obvious when it comes to kabs vs woogies view of him)
another side effect of this Just Enough amount of knowledge aside from being blinded by her own expectations is that it frustrates ppl who think shes oversimplificating things (like me and seemingly several other tumblr users as well) especially when she claims that shes objectively correct and the smartest in the room at any given moment
how this roughness in her analysis affects her in the server still has yet to be fully seen but we do still have at least a couple months until the end but 'til then shes just gonna keep stumbling as more and more complicated situations pop up as is typical in lifesteal to happen and eventually shes gonna have to learn to adapt or else she'll be suffering the consequences one way or another
#mine.txt#analysis#ig. this is very rough tho and is more just thoughts than anything#but i wanted a tag so i can get back to this later to see how right or wrong i am#another thing that affects this is the cc/c divide which is something she likes to take control of#one of the ways it manifests is that she likes to go in and out of it frequently which can be incredibly distracting#esp if youre someone like me who wants the lsers to just. be themselves and get immersed in whats happening around them#and it doesnt help that her and her character can have Very different feelings on a situation#basically the cc/c divide or at least how kab likes to use it affects the way she acts because shes got an idea in her head already#of what to think of the other ppl in the server which makes her inflexible when unexpected things come up#as opposed to when shes just being herself reacting to things#which is unfortunate but i think reflects on how outsiders vs insiders view lifesteal#the reality vs expectations of the audience are so incredibly different esp if you only watch the vids#so much so that while watching kabs vid my initial reaction was that she wasnt as big a ls fan as i originally thought#then realized no this seems like the exact sort of thing id expect from someone whos only seen the vids; particularly of the pvpers#(specified pvpers cause only watching the pvpers vs other kinds of players on the server are Very different experiences)#tho the thing about kab is she Does have insider knowledge!#.... mainly from ppl who dont log on a lot (ash and clown and maybe squiddo)#so naturally thats gonna give her a biased view of how the server works one way or another#the exception to this would be zam telling her about eclipse federation but i think either she doesnt know or severely underestimated#just how much lying; manipulation; keeping secrets; and yap sessions built on incompatible motives and morals happened#that made s4 the way it is not only in game but outside of it as well#''we're at our best when we hate each other irl'' - reddoons according to zam
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@themysteriousmissfeyβ
being an older sibling is like. you've never known a life without me. mom yelled at me and it taught her she never wanted to yell at you. I painted my room purple and grey and then you did too. we live in the same house but I haven't spoken to you in months. I don't know your favorite color. I saw it was going to rain so I picked you up from school on my way home so your books wouldn't get wet. i was so worried when you woke up sick when you were three. you don't remember being sick. mom and dad made their worst mistakes with me and I'm glad they didn't make them with you. I'm doing everything for the first time so you won't be in the dark. I don't know any of your friend's names anymore. I used to know them all. if something happens to mom and dad you won't have to worry because everything will fall to me. you don't like to be home alone but even if you don't see me just knowing I'm there makes you feel better. at least that's what mom told me. you still give me jars to open for you because you can't quite get them. I only see you during dinner. i'd never even think about missing one of your concerts. I stand at the counter when I eat and now you do, too. when offered a selection of books you picked the same one I did when i was your age. I'm terrified you compare yourself to me. I love you. I don't know if you like me. I want you to. mom says dinner's ready
#reblogging this so my sister sees it hopefully#I know I @'d her but this is our tag for when i share something#this post hit me HARD in the feels department#as the youngest sibling I wanted to share some inputs that others might have shared already#but I have a pattern of behavior to keep up where I do all my talking in the tags until tumblr tells me to stop#I am very thankful for my eldest sibling#I do hate being home alone and just knowing my eldest sibling was there always made me feel safer so mom was right#I get a good 50% of my speech pattern from you sister#safe to say probably have other traits I picked up from you#I love you very much and I hope you never forget that#I look up to you daily as if stargazing#I hope you continue to love and support me because it always means the world to me knowing my cool older sister has my back#I have indeed compared myself to you but learned we're both too different to make the comparison fair#It's like comparing the stove to the dishwasher#Both are very useful and wanted but each serves a vastly different purpose#They function independently and require different care#I probably have more thoughts but brain is tired#sister appreciation post
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I know it's useless to get mad at the dog, she's just a hyperactive little thing who doesn't know how to behave yet. She's left home alone for at least 6 hours every day and she's bored, I can't blame her for tearing apart her training pads or shitting all over the place. Even if I did, she must have done it hours ago, dogs don't get that actions that happened so long ago have consequences and all me yelling at her will result in is her being scared of me. I know all that, I do
So WHY am I still so angry at her?? Why does it feel satisfying to lash out and see her scurry away??? She doesn't deserve to be treated like that, she doesn't know any better. And I don't know how to teach her to know better, I don't have the patience for it. She deserves better than me
#I just feel so.. impossibly helpless#here's this tiny creature that depends on me for eveything. that I asked for. that I wanted. and I can't even take care of her properly#I struggle cleaning up after myself. let alone a dog. and I really hate having to handle her shit#I know it's a matter of time. a matter of training#eventually I'll be able to take her on walks and all this won't be an issue anymore#but it is now and I cannot control how much it's pissing me off#if I wasn't alone it would be easier. but I am. so everything falls on me#I'm trying my best and it's just not enough#and my mom will be mad at me because I didn't walk her today even though I promised I would bc it's the last warm day we're supposed to have#but what am I supposed to do if she won't let me take her outside?? she's okay with her harness but the leash scares her#she just stands there hunched over and refuses to move. and cries#I can't force her. I don't want walks to be something she's scared of#but mom is annoyed that getting her used to being leashed takes so long. she insists that forcing her outside is the best course of action#and I can't even tell if she's right or not. I just want my honeybun to be happy and not scared#I feel like crying. I've been barely holding back for the last hour#it's just so so much#it'll pass and settle. I know it will. but I'm just exhausted#now I'll have to admit to everyone that I wasn't able to walk her again...#and that I don't know what to do with her#I don't regret asking for her. I really don't. I've wanted a dog for years#but maybe the timing of exam year + beginning of the colder months wasn't the greatest#and I started my period the day she arrived. so that.. just adds to the emotional instability#I'll get over it. I'll handle everything in time. I just.. wish I had someone to support me#or at least someone who wouldn't tell me 'well what did you expect? owning a dog is hard work. you can't just play all the time.#maybe you should have thought about that responsibility more' I KNOW. I HAVE. I JUST.. have my moments of frustration#that I wish I could express without everyone. including my own mind. telling me I'm a terrible pet owner#that's all#I adore my dog and I would never hurt her or subject her to any harm#but I'm also human and very mentally ill at that. I'm not perfect but I'm not bad. and she deserves better than that#but we're stuck with each other now. I could never give her up. I'm attached already. so... we'll make it work. one way or another. I swear
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me and my best computer friend have been really drifting apart over the past year and I'm trying to be normal and healthy about it but really I feel like sobbing and never making friends ever again
#i understand. shes moved on with her life and thats fine#we're still friends and we still talk sometimes. but it's all small talk and i hate small talk#we've known eachother for four years and i guess become very different people#im trying and i know shes trying too. i want to be friends with her forever#god. i wish i understood twitter. twitter is her main platform now i think#shes barely on discord but mostly on twitter now i think. but i already deleted twitter#:[ theres still so much i wanna do with her. i wanna watch my little pony with her again#i wanna watch shitty anime with her again#shes moved on and i haven't#i feel so lonely. there was a time whwre she was my only friend#i feel so selfish idk .. i can't force her to be my best friend again#im just sooo ..(β dkb#i miss talking to her#its like my life has gotten so empty now and there's nobody around 95% of the time#im going to send her a message now#i hope shes feeling not lonely#i hope shes okay and has a lot of other friends to talk to#i don't know how to feel. i feel bad for wanting to cry over this#she isn't MY person. i can't force her to not drift away from me#but im so sad.. plwase come back to me#there's nobody else interested in me. she was my only friend for so long#i wish i could just understand twitter. maybe we'd be close again if i was on twitter#but twitter is just so.. headache inducing. i can't use it#i don't think you have to talk to somebody extremely often to be friends though. its not about how often we talk#every conversation we have now is so dry and empty#i don't know what to do#i don't know why im posting this either. i just dont know what to do at all#sad face
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i found a good boy, and he's on my side | lando norris smau
lando norris x reader | a little bit of best friend!oscar
summary: when y/n's ex writes a messy song about her, fans push for lando to break up with her (he doesn't even consider it)
fc: sabrina carpenter
kind of a part 2 to what a coincidence, but you don't have to read part 1 for this to make sense
warnings: non-existent angst, lando very much in love with y/n, very brief mention of cheating (not lando), maybe some typos
note: y/e = your ex
yourex
liked by user1 and 593,827 others
yourex Biting My Tongue out tonight
Finally sharing my truth
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user1 WE LOVE YOU Y/E
user2 ready for the tea πΏ
ynfan2 PLEASE LEAVE Y/N ALONE I BEG WE'RE OVER YOU
ynfan1 "sharing my truth" OHHHH BROTHER
user3 the y/n fans getting nervous
ynfan2 not nervous, sick of his lies
user2 perhaps y/n isn't as perfect as you think
user4 anyone else just here for the music
user5 @ yourusername YOU ARE SO OVER
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yourusername
liked by landonorris, yourbff, and 1,138,827 others
yourusername leng
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ynfan2 UNBOTHERED QUEEN
user2 is she just pretending her ex didn't drop a shady song about her
user6 lando still in the likes ... this is so sad
yourbff your reminder to not wear the red top this weekend
yourusername you've seen my outfits already TRUST there's no red in sight
landonorris that's my girl
ynfan1 MOTHER IS GOING TO SILVERSTONE
user4 how has lando not dumped you yet
user5 you really don't deserve lando
user3 HAS LANDO HEARD THE SONG YET? DUMP HER!!!
ynfan3 what's with all the loser hate comments
landonorris my girlfriend is sooooo leng now come give me a kiss
yourusername calm down
yourusername on my way tho
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landonorris
liked by oscarpiastri, yourusername, and 983,492
landonorris a little summer fun
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user1 JEALOUS
yourusername who's the baddie
landonorris that's my girlfriend mate back off
ynfan2 WHY ARE THEY LIKE THIS
user3 waiting for the dumping...
user4 crazy that they're still together
user8 i think some of y'all are a bit dramatic, the song wasn't even that bad and it's just his perspective
ynfan3 A LANDO FAN WITH A BRAIN
yourbff last pic i want her baddddd
landonorris so you don't want [redacted]'s number anymore?
yourbff WAIT I TAKE IT BACK
ynfan2 QUEEN Y/BFF FINALLY APPROVING OF ONE OF Y/N'S MEN
oscarpiastri you stole my best friend
yourusername we literally have plans next week
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yourusername
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yourusername is this thing on? π€
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ynfan1 MOTHER IN THE STUDIO!!!!!
ynfan2 the last pic has me crying ππ i just know she's about to be a menace
user2 if she's actually making a response song that's kinda pathetic
user3 right? her fans all say y/e is using her for fame but she's also doing it
yourbff let me hear it first
oscarpiastri i better get the link first
landonorris ignore both of them, i get first dibs
user1 THE DRAMA if she's making a response song lando better get out of there quick before he's her next victim
user4 WE DON'T CARE ABOUT YOUR LOVE LIFE
ynfan3 all these haters camping on y/n's post omg she's so famous
ynfan4 WE LOVE YOU Y/N IGNORE THE LOSERS
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yourusername
liked by landonorris, oscarpiastri, and 1,428,372 others
yourusername my turnπ©·
surprise! planned to keep these in the vault, but i guess things change. 'vicious' and 'eternal sunshine' live performances out now on youtube! studio version out friday π
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landonorris proud of you love π€
yourusername π§‘π§‘π§‘
ynfan2 OH MY GOD NO WAYYYYYYY
ynfan3 "my turnπ©·" THAT'S MOTHERRRRRRRRR
ynfan1 love lando supporting her through it all that's a good man
ynfan4 SHE SPILLED Y/E IS SO DONE
yourbff i love you so much!!!
yourusername love you!!
user3 these songs are really good ... sorry for hating before
user1 some of y'all switching up in the comments, she could be lying!!
ynfan5 perhaps i misinterpreted the lyrics, but did y/e CHEAT ON HER???
ynfan3 pretty sure π
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yourusername
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yourusername it doesn't get, doesn't get better than this π§‘
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yourbff LOVE Y'ALL SO MUCH
ynfan4 THESE HAVE TO BE LYRICS
ynfan3 more lover girl music coming soon LET'S GOOOOOOO
ynfan2 y/n writing her two shady songs about y/e then going back to writing cheesy love songs for lando we love to see it
landonorris how i obsessively adore you π€
ynfan2 y'all they're quoting future lyrics right in front of our faces i just know it
user3 it's not looking like a break up any time soon
oscarpiastri answer my texts
yourusername sorry been busy π€
oscarpiastri disgusting
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"Did the love affair maim you too?"
Joel miller x f!reader
next part
Summary: Joel doesn't like you until he loses all his memories.
w.c: 14k> (longest piece I've written and my eyes are dry)
warnings: fluff, mention of amnesia, memory loss, ANGST and angst, and more angst because I love angst. There is smut but you already know I'm bad at writing that. No proof reading, I'm lazy, sorry.
a/n: hello! I got inspired by this "memory loss" type of story. It was supposed to be a one shoot, but I had to split the whole thing so another part is more likely to happen. I know there has been some drama surrounding writers and I want to say that every single person who writes and makes an art with that is amazing! Everyone who is reading this, please give creators here your flowers. With that being said, Happy reading or not ππ Reblogs and comments are always appreciated. (come on, talk to me)
dividers by @saradika-graphics
Joel didn't used to hate women, but man, when he met you for the first time, you crawled under his skin. He had fun with you, making jokes, trying to get on your nerves. For his hell, everyone in Jackson loved you; after all, you were the nurse and the sweetheart. Always looking after everyone, always being sweet to everyone.
It was a sunny afternoon when you first arrived in Jackson, your kind demeanor and skilled hands quickly gaining the trust and admiration of the townsfolk. Joel watched from a distance with his arms crossed and a scowl on his face. He couldn't understand why everyone was so taken with you. To him, you seemed too soft, too gentle for the brutal world they lived in.
"Hey, Joel," Tommy called out one day, pulling Joel from his brooding thoughts. "We're heading out on patrol. You should meet the new nurse. She's something else."
Joel grunted in response, not bothering to hide his disinterest. He didn't need to meet you to know what kind of person you were. In his mind, you were just another naive newcomer who wouldn't last a week.
But fate had other plans. That very evening, a group of raiders attacked the outer perimeter. The town was thrown into chaos, and Joel found himself side by side with you, defending the walls. He couldn't help but notice your bravery and the way you handled yourself under pressure.
After the attack, as the town counted its injuries and losses, you worked tirelessly, tending to the wounded. Joel watched you, his irritation growing as he saw the way everyone fawned over you, thanking you for your care.
"Think you're some kind of hero, huh?" Joel muttered as he approached you, his voice laced with sarcasm.
You looked up at him, exhaustion evident in your eyes, but you offered a small, tired smile. "Just doing my job, Joel."
"Your job?" Joel scoffed. "You think patching up a few cuts and bruises is going to keep these people safe? This world doesn't care how sweet you are."
You met his gaze, unwavering. "And what would you have me do, Joel? Let them suffer? We're all trying to survive here, and we all have our roles to play."
Joel huffed and walked away, but your words lingered in his mind. Despite himself, he couldn't deny that you were right. Over the following weeks, Joel continued to watch you, his annoyance slowly giving way to a grudging respect. He noticed how you never backed down, how you always stood your ground, even when faced with his relentless jabs.
One day, during a particularly harsh winter storm, you and Joel were sent out on a supply run. The weather was brutal, and the path was treacherous. As the wind howled around you, Joel found himself instinctively moving closer, his protective instincts kicking in despite his irritation.
"Watch your step," he warned, his voice gruff.
You nodded, shivering against the cold. "Thanks, Joel."
As you both trudged forward, the wind picked up, and visibility dropped to almost nothing. You focused on placing one foot in front of the other, barely able to see Joel a few steps ahead. Suddenly, you heard a sharp crack and a thud.
"Joel!" you shouted, fear gripping your heart.
Rushing forward, you found Joel lying on the ground, unconscious, blood trickling from a gash on his forehead. He must have slipped on the ice and hit his head on a rock hidden beneath the snow.
Panic set in, but you forced yourself to stay calm. You needed to get him back to Jackson quickly. You checked his pulse, relieved to find it steady, then did your best to bandage the wound with the supplies you had. With great effort, you managed to lift Joel and drape him over your shoulder, carrying him back through the storm.
By the time you reached Jackson, you were exhausted and freezing, but you didn't stop until you got Joel to the infirmary. The doctors took over, treating his wound and monitoring his condition.
You sat by Joel's bedside, watching him closely. Hours passed, and eventually he began to stir. His eyes fluttered open, and he looked around, disoriented.
"Joel?" you said softly, leaning forward.
He turned his head to you, his brow furrowing in confusion. But then, a slow, almost lazy smile spread across his face. "Well, hello there, beautiful," he said, his voice low and smooth. "Did I die and wake up in heaven?"
You blink, taken aback by his words. "Uh, Joel, it's me. Do you remember what happened?"
Joel's smile didn't waver as he looked at you. "I remember everything... except meeting you before. Are you sure we haven't met in a dream?"
You glanced at Tommy, who had just walked into the room, and saw the same confusion mirrored on his face. "Joel," Tommy said cautiously, stepping closer, "do you know who I am?"
Joel's eyes shifted to Tommy, his smile fading into a look of mild frustration. "Of course I do, Tommy. You're my brother. But I'm more interested in getting to know this doll here."
Tommy exchanged bewildered looks with you. "Joel, this is⦠Ah. She's... well, you two never really got along."
Joel's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "Really? Well, I must've been an idiot then because I can't imagine not liking someone like you."
Your heart raced, unsure how to respond to this flirtatious side of Joel, the same who hours ago was trying to crawl under your skin, the same one who had rejected you all this time. "Joel, you really don't remember me at all?"
Joel shook his head, still gazing at you with that same enamored look. "Not a thing. But I gotta say, I feel like I'm seeing you for the first time, and I like what I see."
Tommy scratched his head, clearly at a loss. "This is... something else. We need to figure out what happened to his memory."
You nodded, trying to process the sudden shift in Joel's demeanor. You knew the hit on the head did something to his memory, but you didnβt know how to face it. "Joel, you hit your head pretty hard. The doctors said you might have some memory loss. Maybe this is part of it."
Joel reached out and gently took your hand, his touch sending a shiver down your spine. "Well, if forgetting the past means I get to start over with you, I think I can live with that."
You couldn't help but blush, feeling a mix of confusion and something else you couldn't quite place. Perhaps butterflies are flying all around inside your tummy. "We'll take it slow, okay? There's a lot you need to know."
Joel's grip on your hand tightened slightly, his eyes never leaving yours. "As long as you're the one teaching me, I'm all in."
Tommy coughed awkwardly, breaking the moment. "Alright, let's give Joel some time to rest and recover. We'll figure this out together."
You nodded, reluctantly pulling your hand away from Joel's. "Get some rest, Joel. We'll talk more later."
As you and Tommy left the room, you couldn't shake the feeling of Joel's gaze following you. Tommy put a reassuring hand on your shoulder. "We'll get to the bottom of this. Just... be careful. He's not the same Joel right now."
You nodded, your mind racing with the implications of Joel's memory loss and his sudden interest in you. The days ahead were sure to be challenging, but you couldn't deny the flicker of excitement at the thought of getting to know this new, more open version of Joel.
A version where he could get to know you and maybe, like, a new story waiting to be written with the both of you becoming friends, and not just acquaintances just having to tolerate each other for the communityβs sake.
The days following Joel's accident were a whirlwind of confusion and unexpected emotions dancing on your mind. Joel's flirtatious comments and affectionate demeanor were a stark contrast to the gruff, often combative man you had known before.
You had started to get used to feeling his nice demeanor towards you. You found yourself happier than before, smiling at the thought of him when you werenβt with him, and he had become your last thought on your bed just before going to sleep, but you were aware his condition perhaps wasnβt permanent and he was going to recover his memories of you, so you didnβt want to take advantage of that, nor did you want to fall for Joel, not when the fear of him waking up one day and hating you as usual was a threat.
His recovery was slow but steady, and you spent a lot of time by his side, helping him piece together the fragments of his memory. Every interaction felt like walking on fire, with Joel's behavior making your heart flutter and your mind racing at thousand miles per hour.
As you were changing the bandage on his head, Joel watched you with a soft smile. "You know, you have the gentlest touch. It's like you're an angel sent to take care of me."
You blushed, avoiding his gaze. "I'm just doing my job, Joel. Making sure your pretty head heals properly."
Joel reached up and gently brushed a strand of hair behind your ear. "You're more than just a nurse to me now. I don't know what it is, but I feel this connection with you. Like we're meant to be."
You took a deep breath, trying to steady your emotions. "Joel, a few days ago I was nothing to you. You donβt remember me, so please just focus on getting better."
Joel's expression softened; his eyes filled with earnestness. "I get it, but I can't help how I feel. This connectionβit's real to me, even if I don't remember our past."
You bit your lip, feeling a mix of frustration and affection. "Joel, you're vulnerable right now. Your mind is trying to make sense of everything, and it's confusing. We need to take things slow."
Joel nodded reluctantly, his hand lingering near your cheek before he pulled it back. "I trust you. Just know that I'm here, and I want to get to know you, past or no past."
You gave him a reassuring smile. "One step at a time, okay? Let's focus on getting you back on your feet first."
Just then, Tommy walked in, carrying a tray of food. He cleared his throat, causing you to step back from Joel. "Brought you some lunch, big brother. Howβre you feeling?"
Joel's eyes lit up at the sight of his brother. "Thanks, Tommy. I'm feeling better every day. And with this sunshine here, it's hard not to feel good."
Tommy gave you a knowing look, his concern evident. "Glad to hear it. Mind if I have a word with you outside?" he asked, looking towards you.
You nodded, feeling a mix of relief and anxiety. "Of course, Tommy."
As you stepped outside the room, Tommy closed the door behind you, his expression serious. "How are you holding up?"
You sighed, crossing your arms. "It's... complicated. Joel is so different now. He's kind, attentive, and he seems genuinely interested in me. But he doesn't remember our pastβhow much we clashed."
Tommy nodded, his face lined with concern. "I can see how that would be confusing. But you have to be careful. This might just be his way of coping with the memory loss. He's latching onto the one constant he has right nowβyou."
You looked down, feeling a lump form in your throat. "I know. I'm trying to keep my distance, but it's hard. He's... he's different, Tommy. And I can't deny that I'm starting to care for him."
Tommy placed a hand on your shoulder, his grip firm and reassuring. "I get it. But you need to remember that his memory might come back, and when it does, he could revert to the Joel we knew before. You have to protect yourself, too."
βAm I that unlovable?β you sighed.
Tommy's expression softened, and he shook his head. "No, you're not unlovable. Far from it. But the Joel we knew before... he had his walls up, and you know how stubborn he can be. If his memory comes back, he might go back to those old habits, those old defenses."
You nodded, feeling the weight of his words. "I understand. It's just... complicated."
Tommy gave your shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "Just take it slow. Don't rush into anything, and remember to take care of yourself too. You suffered a lot before arriving here."
You managed a small smile. "Thanks, Tommy. I needed that."
Tommy smiled back. "Anytime."
Returning to Joel's room, you found him sitting up, his eyes lighting up as you walked in. "Hey, everything okay?"
You nodded, forcing a smile. "Yeah, just had a chat with Tommy."
Joel's expression became thoughtful. "You know, I'm really grateful for everything you're doing for me. I can't imagine what it must be like, dealing with me like this."
You sat down beside him, taking a deep breath. "It's not easy, Joel, but it's worth it. You're worth it."
Joel reached out, taking your hand in his. "You know, even though I don't remember everything, I feel like I'm seeing you for the first time. And I like what I see."
Your heart raced, and you struggled to keep your emotions in check. "Joel, we need to take things slow. Focus on your recovery first."
Joel nodded, a small smile playing on his lips. "I understand. But I can't help how I feel."
He has repeated the same phrase as before, and you couldnβt help but feel yourself diving into a deep ocean for him.
You squeezed his hand gently. "One step at a time, okay?"
Joel's eyes held a determined glint. "One step at a time."
The late afternoon sun cast long shadows across the Jackson settlement as you walked briskly toward the main gate, your medical bag slung over your shoulder. You spotted Joel waiting for you, his arms crossed and a scowl already etched on his face.
"You're late," he growled as you approached.
You rolled your eyes. "I'm five minutes late, Joel. I had to take care of a kid with a fever."
Joel grunted, clearly unimpressed. "We have a schedule for a reason. Being late puts us at risk."
"Don't lecture me about risk," you shot back, your patience wearing thin. "I know the dangers out there just as well as you do."
Joel's eyes narrowed. "Do you? Because sometimes it feels like you're too soft for this world. Always stopping to help every stray animal and sick kid."
"Excuse me for having a heart," you snapped. "Not everyone wants to live like a damn machine."
"Having a heart can get you killed," Joel retorted, his voice rising. "Out there, you need to be tough. Focused."
"And maybe if you lightened up a bit, people wouldn't be so scared of you," you shot back, your frustration boiling over.
Joel took a step closer, his jaw clenched. "I don't care if people are scared of me. I care about keeping them safe. And you, with your bleeding heart, make that harder."
You felt a surge of anger and hurt at his words. "You know what, Joel? Maybe the problem isn't me. Maybe it's you. Maybe you're so wrapped up in your own pain that you can't see anyone else's."
Joel's face darkened, a mix of anger and something elseβsomething like hurtβflashing in his eyes. "You don't know anything about my pain."
"And you don't know anything about mine," you replied, your voice trembling with emotion. "So maybe you should stop judging me and start seeing that we're all trying to survive in this hell together."
For a moment, the two of you stood there, the tension crackling between you like a live wire. Then Joel turned away, his shoulders stiff. "Let's just get this patrol over with."
You followed him out of the gate, your heart heavy with unresolved emotions. The silence between you was thick and uncomfortable, but neither spoke. The rift between you seemed insurmountable, and you couldn't see how things would ever change.
You woke up with a pain on your neck. You had fallen asleep on a chair next to Joelβs bed where he was now lay resting, his breathing even and steady. His recovery was going well, but the emotional landscape was far more complex and you wanted to take the risk to discover it. Β
You watched him for a moment, taking a mental picture of his face, the creases on his skin, how peaceful he looked like this. feeling the weight of uncertainty and guilt within you.
In that exact moment, Joel stirred, his eyes fluttering open. He looked around, his gaze settling on you with a warmth that made your heart skip a beat. "Hey, sunshine."
"Hey," you replied softly, mirroring his smile "How are you feeling?"
Joel stretched, wincing slightly but smiling nonetheless. "Better. Thanks to you."
You couldn't help but smile back, the tension easing a bit. "Just doing my job, Joel."
His eyes softened as he looked at you. "You're doing more than just your job. You've been taking care of me, looking out for me. I appreciate it."
You felt a warmth spread through you at his words. "It's what anyone would do."
Joel shook his head slightly. "No, not everyone. You're special, and I... I think Iβm starting to understand that."
You felt a flutter in your chest at his words, a mix of emotions swirling within you. "Joel, you don't need to say that. You're still recovering, and things are confusing right now."
Joel's gaze remained steady, his expression earnest. "I mean it. There's something about you... something that's been here all along, and I was too stubborn to see it."
Your heart ached with the weight of his words, knowing how complicated the situation was. "Joelβ¦β
βDid I care about you before?β he asked, gaze locked with yours.
You shook your head βNo. Not really.β
You shook your head, feeling the sting of the truth. βNo. Not really.β
Joel looked troubled, his brows knitting together. βI find that hard to believe. Because right now, I canβt imagine not caring about you.β
You took a deep breath, trying to find the right words. βThings were different before, Joel. We didnβt get along. You were... closed off, and I guess I was just someone who got under your skin.β
Joelβs expression softened with regret. βIβm sorry. For whatever I did to make you feel that way. I wish I could remember, but all I know is that right now, I see you, and I feel... connected.β
A memory from the past surged forward, vivid and painful. It was a cold evening in Jackson, just after a particularly difficult supply run. You and Joel had been at odds all day, and the tension between you was palpable.
"Why do you always have to be so damn difficult?" Joel snapped; his voice harsh as he slammed the door behind him.
You bristled at his tone, your own temper flaring. "Maybe because you treat me like Iβm incompetent! Iβm trying my best out there, Joel. Weβre supposed to be a team."
Joel scoffed, his eyes narrowing. "A team? Youβre a liability more than anything."
The words cut deep, but you stood your ground. "Thatβs not fair, and you know it. Iβm just trying to help, like everyone else."
Joelβs face twisted with frustration. "Help? You call what you do helping? Itβs a wonder anyone here can stand you."
The hurt was immediate and sharp, but you refused to let him see how much his words affected you. "At least Iβm trying to do something good. You just push everyone away."
Joel stepped closer, his expression dark. "Maybe thereβs a reason for that. I find it hard to believe anyone could actually love you."
The silence that followed was deafening. You stared at him, disbelief and pain warring within you. Without another word, you turned and left, unable to bear the weight of his cruelty.
Back in the present, you blinked, trying to dispel the memory. Joel was watching you closely, concern etched into his features. "Whatβs wrong?"
You forced a smile, though it didnβt reach your eyes. "Just... remembering something."
Joel reached out, gently taking your hand. "I wish I could remember too. So, I could make it right."
You looked down at your joined hands, the warmth of his touch grounding you. "Maybe itβs better this way.
Joel squeezed your hand gently. "A fresh start sounds good. But I still want to know everything. About us, about what I did wrong. So, I can be better."
You nodded, taking the risk and pushing your luck.
You and Joel could become friends, right?
"You and I... we could become friends, right?" you asked.
Joelβs eyes softened even more, and he smiled. "Friends sounds like a good start. We can build from there."
You felt a surge of relief. "Friends it is, then."
The days passed, each one bringing closeness between you and Joel. He had got better, slowly starting to get back to his tasks. The community noticed the change in him, how he was more open and approachable. You often found yourselves working together, whether it was on supply runs or him visiting the infirmary when you were there working.
One afternoon, you were busy organizing medical supplies when Joel walked in, a smile spreading across his face as he saw you. "Hey, need any help in here?" he asked, leaning against the doorframe.
You looked up, smiling back. "Joel, what are you doing here? I thought you were out patrolling.β
Joel shrugged, stepping further into the room. "Finished early. Thought Iβd come by and see if you needed a hand."
He, in fact lied. He switched places with another guy just to spend time with you again. He could feel your fear irradiating but he wanted to get to know you better. He couldnβt wrap his mind around the fact he didnβt like someone like you and he wanted to change that. Β
You chuckled, shaking your head. " Sure, you can help me with these supplies. There are some boxes that need to be sorted."
Joel rolled up his sleeves and joined you, his presence filling the small room with a comforting warmth. As you worked side by side, you found yourself stealing glances at him, marveling at the changes in him. He was more relaxed, more open, and undeniably more attentive.
"You know," Joel said after a while, breaking the comfortable silence, "I think I like helping out here more than patrolling."
You raised an eyebrow, teasingly. "Oh? And why is that?"
Joel grinned, his eyes twinkling with mischief. "Because I get to spend more time with you."
You blushed, focusing intently on the box in front of you. "Youβre just saying that."
"No, I mean it," Joel replied, his tone sincere. "I like being around you. You make everything better."
You felt a warmth spread through you at his words, and you couldn't help but smile. "Well, I like having you around too."
The truth was that stealing glances at him now felt like interlocking fingers without even touching his skin, there wasnβt precisely a sexual tension or possessiveness over him, but a warm incandescent glow within every time he smiled at you. That was something you hadnβt felt in so long, and this time felt so right yet so wrong.
You both continued to work in comfortable silence, the rhythm of your tasks interrupted only by the occasional exchange of smiles or a shared joke. The closeness was undeniable, and you could feel the lines between friendship and something more starting to blur.
One afternoon, you were out on a supply run together, scanning the area for anything useful. The sun was setting, casting a golden hue over the landscape. As you bent down to pick up some supplies, Joel suddenly appeared by your side, his proximity making your heart race.
"Need a hand?" he asked, his voice low and warm.
You looked up at him, finding it hard to concentrate with him so close. "Sure, thanks."
As you both worked, the conversation flowed easily. Joel's presence was comforting, and you found yourself opening up to him in ways you hadn't before.
"You know, I never really thanked you properly," Joel said, his tone serious.
"For what?" you asked, genuinely curious.
"For saving my life. For being there for me when I needed it the most," Joel replied, his eyes meeting yours with a sincerity that made your heart ache.
You shook your head, a soft smile on your lips. "You donβt need to thank me, Joel. I did what anyone would do."
"Not anyone," he insisted, his gaze intense. "You went above and beyond. You always do."
You blushed, the warmth spreading through you once again. "Well, I care about you. I canβt help it."
Joel's expression softened, and he reached out, gently brushing a strand of hair behind your ear. "I care about you too. More than I ever thought possible."
The moment hung in the air, filled with unspoken words and emotions. You could feel the pull between you, the undeniable connection that had grown stronger with each passing day.
"Joel, this is complicated," you whispered, your voice trembling slightly. "We need to take things slow."
"I know," he replied, his hand lingering near your face. "But Iβm not going anywhere, but Iβm not going anywhere.β
Joel's feelings for you had grown stronger. He found himself being smitten and completely in love by you, by your beauty, your strength and your soft heart. You were everything that was good with this world. Where everything and everyone was people with shadows dying out of melancholy, you were an angel wrapping your warm arms around him, making his world brighter. He had learnt how to savor the colors again.
As you continued your days together, Joel couldn't help but find ways to be close to you. He would always volunteer to accompany you on supply runs, ensuring you were safe and cared for. He would show up at the infirmary with small gifts β a flower he found on his patrol, a cup of your favorite tea, or a book he thought you might like. His gestures were always thoughtful and sincere, each one a testament to the depth of his feelings.
Joel couldn't take his eyes off you. You were kneeling in the ground, your hands deftly cleaning something you had found, your face serene and focused. Joel felt a swell of emotion, unable to keep it to himself any longer.
"You know," he began, his voice gentle, "I used to think this world had nothing left to offer. But then I met you."
You looked up, your heart skipping a beat at the intensity in his gaze. "Joel..."
He knelt beside you, his hand covering yours. "You make everything better. You've brought light into my life, and I can't imagine going back to the way things were."
You felt a mixture of warmth and apprehension. His words were everything you wanted to hear, yet the uncertainty of the situation weighed heavily on your heart. "Joel, this is all so new and complicated. We need to be careful."
Joel's grip on your hand tightened slightly, his eyes full of determination. "I know it's complicated, and I know we've got a lot to figure out. But I can't ignore what I feel. I want to be here for you, with you, through everything."
You took a deep breath, feeling the weight of his words. "I want that too, Joel. But we need to take it one step at a time."
He nodded, a soft smile spreading across his face. "I will make you fall in love with me," he said, his voice full of determination and warmth.
You couldn't help but smile back, feeling a mix of hope and apprehension. "You're quite confident, aren't you?"
Joel chuckled, his eyes never leaving yours. "When it comes to you, I am."
You smiled, feeling a flutter in your chest at his words. "Let's get back to Jackson," you said, standing up and brushing off your clothes. Joel stood with you, offering a hand to help you up.
As you made your way back to Jackson, the conversation flowed easily. Joel told you stories from before the outbreak, sharing pieces of his past he hadnβt opened up about before. You found yourself laughing at his anecdotes, feeling a growing sense of connection.
When you finally reached the gates of Jackson, the sun was setting, casting a warm glow over the community. People greeted you both warmly, noticing the change in Joel's demeanor. He was more relaxed and more present, and it was clear to everyone that you had a positive influence on him.
Tommy approached, a knowing smile on his face. "Good to see you both back safe and sound."
Joel clapped his brother on the shoulder. "It was a good run. Found some useful supplies."
Tommy nodded, then looked at you. "And how about you? Everything alright?"
You smiled, feeling the warmth of Joelβs gaze on you on your face. "Yeah, everything's good."
As the evening settled in, you and Joel made your way to the communal dining hall. The chatter of the community filled the air, and you found a spot to sit together. Joelβs hand lingered near yours, his touch reassuring and steady.
Tommy, Ellie, and Maria soon joined you at the table. Tommy was carrying a tray laden with food, Ellie trailing behind him with a mischievous grin, and Maria gave you a warm smile as she took a seat.
"Good to see you two back," Elli said, setting down the tray and passing out plates. βHow was the run?" Ellie asked, her eyes sparkling with curiosity.
"It went well," Joel replied, his gaze briefly meeting yours before he continued. "Found some useful supplies and had some good company."
Ellie smirked, elbowing Tommy. "I bet you did."
You blushed, focusing on your plate as you filled it with food. Maria, ever perceptive, glanced between you and Joel with a knowing smile. "It's good to see everyone together," she said, her tone light and warm.
As you all began to eat, the conversation flowed naturally. Tommy and Maria talked about the latest updates in the community, Ellie shared stories from her day, and Joel occasionally chimed in with his dry humor, making everyone laugh.
At one point, Ellie leaned over to you, her voice low enough so only you could hear. "Joel's been different lately. In a good way. You've been good for him."
You looked at her, surprised by her observation. "I hope so. It's been... a journey."
Ellie nodded, her expression sincere. "Just keep being you. That's all he needs."
The meal continued, filled with warmth and laughter. Joel's hand occasionally brushed against yours, sending electricity down your body.
Just as you were starting to relax, a woman approached the table, her presence causing a ripple of unease. It was Lori, one of the women Joel used to date. Joel visibly tensed, his gaze dropping to his plate as Lori stopped beside him, her smile a mix of surprise and something else you couldn't quite place.
βJoel," she said, her voice smooth and confident. "I didn't expect to see you here."
Joel looked up, a flicker of recognition in his eyes. "Lori. Uh, hi."
Lori glanced around the table, her eyes settling on you for a moment before she looked back at Joel. "I was just passing by and saw you all together. Mind if I join?"
Before anyone could respond, Tommy jumped in. "Sure, why not? There's always room for one more."
Lori pulled up a chair and sat down, her presence adding a layer of tension to the dynamics. Joel seemed uncomfortable; his usual confidence was replaced by nervous energy.
"So, Joel," Lori began, her tone light but probing. "How have you been? It's been a while."
Joel cleared his throat, glancing at you briefly before answering. "Yeah, it has. I've been... good. Just busy with everything here."
Lori nodded, her gaze shifting between you and Joel. "I can see that. Looks like you've made some new friends." She said, bitterly, βThe last time I knew from you was when you left my house after our night, and then you hit your head and never spoke to me again.β
The table fell silent, tension crackling in the air. Joel looked uncomfortable, his gaze dropping to his plate. You could see the guilt and confusion in his eyes as he tried to process Lori's words.
"I'm sorry, Lori," Joel finally said, his voice low. "I don't remember much from before the accident. It's been... complicated."
Lori's expression softened slightly, but the hurt in her eyes remained. "I get that. But it still stings, you know? You just disappeared."
You felt a pang of empathy for Lori but also a fierce protectiveness over Joel. "It's been hard for him,β you said gently, trying to ease the tension. "Joel's been working hard to piece things together. He's different now, and we're all just trying to move forward."
Lori glanced at you, her expression unreadable. "I can see that, but it seems like you had taken advantage of the situation; he couldnβt stand your ass before his accident, and suddenly you have him like a little puppy following you everywhere.β
Your heart drops to your stomach, feeling warm spreading to your cheeks.
Joel's jaw tightened, and he quickly interjected, his voice firm. "That's enough, Lori. You don't know what you're talking about."
Lori raised an eyebrow, crossing her arms. "I just find it convenient, that's all."
Tommy leaned forward, his tone calm but authoritative. "Lori, we're all trying to move forward here. It's not fair to make accusations."
Ellie, always quick to defend those she cared about, added, "You weren't here to see what she did for Joel. She saved his life and has been helping him every step of the way."
Lori's gaze softened slightly, but the tension remained. "I'm sorry if I overstepped. I just needed to understand."
Maria nodded, her voice gentle. "We all get that, Lori. It's been a tough situation for everyone."
You took a deep breath, trying to steady your emotions. "It's okay. "You took a deep breath before continuing. βIβll take some fresh air,β you said, standing up, not even looking down at Joel, who seemed sad at your whole dementor.
You took a deep breath, trying to steady your emotions. "It's okay. Iβ" you paused, feeling the weight of the conversation pressing down on you. "Iβll take some fresh air," you said, standing up abruptly. Avoiding eye contact with Joel, who looked sad and concerned, you made your way outside.
The cool evening air was a welcome relief, and you walked a little way from the dining hall, finding a quiet spot to gather your thoughts. You leaned against a tree, closing your eyes and taking deep, calming breaths.
After a few moments, you heard footsteps approaching. You opened your eyes to see Ellie standing there, her expression filled with concern. "Hey, you okay?"
You nodded, managing a small smile. "Yeah, I just needed a moment. That was a bit embarrassing."
Ellie walked over and leaned against the wall next to you. "Lori was out of line. You've been amazing with Joel. Anyone with eyes can see that."
βSo, donβt you think Iβve been taking advantage of him?β You asked, really concerned.
βWhat are you talking about? He is the one completely enamored by you.β She replied, laughing.
Ellie laughed, shaking her head. "What are you talking about? He is the one completely enamored by you."
You sighed, leaning back against the wall. "I know, but sometimes it feels like Iβm walking on eggshells. It feels like he is going to wake up from his trance and he will hate me again."
Ellie placed a comforting hand on your shoulder. "Listen, I've seen the way he looks at you. Heβs happier, lighter. Youβve brought out a side of him I didnβt think existed. And trust me, if he didnβt want this, heβd make it clear."
You took a deep breath.
βWhatβs the worst that could happen?β Ellie asked.
βMe, falling in love with him,β you answer.
βWhatβs the worst that could happen?β Ellie asked, her tone light but sincere.
You sighed, the weight of your fears pressing down. βMe, falling in love with him,β you answered quietly.
Ellie gave you a sympathetic look. "And why is that so bad?"
"Because," you began, struggling to put your feelings into words, "what if his memories come back and he realizes he doesnβt feel the same way? Or worse, what if I fall in love with him and he changes back to the old Joel, the one who couldnβt stand me?"
Ellie nodded, understanding. "That's a risk, sure. But you can't let fear keep you from living. You've been through so much together, and it's clear he cares about you deeply now. Maybe that won't change."
You bit your lip, the turmoil inside you reflected in your eyes. "I just don't want to get hurt, Ellie. And I donβt want to hurt him either."
Ellie squeezed your shoulder. "I get it. But if you keep holding back, you'll never know what could be. Sometimes, you just have to take a leap of faith."
You let out a shaky breath, nodding. "Maybe you're right."
Ellie grinned. "Of course I'm right. Now, let's get back in there. Joel's probably worrying himself sick."
You smiled, feeling a bit more at ease. "Okay, let's go."
As you walked back into the dining hall, you found Joel still sitting at the table, his eyes lighting up when he saw your return. He stood up as you approached, his concern evident.
"You okay?" he asked softly.
You nodded, giving him a reassuring smile. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just needed a breather."
Joel looked relieved, and he gently took your hand. "I'm glad you're back."
The evening continued with easy conversation, and as you all eventually made your way out of the dining hall, Joel walked beside you, his presence a comforting constant.
"Thanks for dinner," he said softly as you approached your door.
"Anytime," you replied, feeling a warmth in your chest at his words. "It was nice, being with everyone."
Joel nodded, his eyes lingering on you. "It was. And I meant what I said today. Iβll make you fall in love with me.β
You chuckled softly, feeling a mix of nerves and excitement at his words. "You're really set on that, aren't you?"
Joel nodded, his expression serious but with a hint of a smile that made you go crazy. "I am. Because I know what I feel now, and Iβm not going to let it slip away."
You looked into his eyes, seeing the sincerity there. "Joel, this is new for both of us. We need to take it one step at a time."
He took a step closer, his hand gently brushing against yours. βAm I that unlovable?β
You blinked, taken aback by his question. "What? No, Joel, you're not unlovable at all. It's just... complicated."
Joel's eyes softened, and he took your hand in his, his thumb gently brushing over your knuckles. "I get that. But I need you to know that Iβm not going anywhere. Iβll wait as long as it takes."
You felt a warmth spread through you at his words. "I appreciate that, Joel. And I do care about you. A lot. It's just..."
"Scary?" he finished for you, his voice gentle.
You nodded.
Joel's expression turned thoughtful, and he nodded slowly. "Yeah, I get it. It is scary. But sometimes, the best things come from taking a leap of faith."
You took a deep breath, feeling the weight of his words. "Itβs not just about taking a leap. Itβs about making sure weβre ready for whatever comes next."
Joel squeezed your hand gently, his eyes never leaving yours. "I understand. And I'm ready to take it slow to give you the space you need. Just know that Iβm here for you, and Iβm not giving up on us."
You felt a mix of relief and trepidation, but Joel's unwavering support gave you strength. "Thank you, Joel. That means a lot to me."
He leaned in, resting his forehead against yours for a moment, his breath warm against your skin. "Weβll figure it out, one step at a time."
You nodded, closing your eyes for a brief second, allowing yourself to savor the closeness and the promise of what might come. When you opened your eyes again, you saw Joelβs smileβa smile that made you believe in the possibility of a new beginning.
"Goodnight," he whispered, his voice tender, holding back the desire to cupp your face and kiss you.
"Goodnight, Joel," you replied, your heart fluttering, feeling the same as him.
Now standing, this close, face to face, skins touching. One of you would give in before, and once that happened, there was no going to be a way to stop two hearts beating this fast.
Joel's eyes locked onto yours, the intensity of his gaze revealing the depth of his emotions. You could see the conflict within him, the longing that mirrored your own. His hand lingered near your face, his fingers almost brushing against your skin, his breath warm and steady.
The moment felt suspended in time, the air between you charged with unspoken words and electric anticipation. You both stood there, so close that you could feel the heat radiating from each other, your hearts racing in sync.
Joelβs voice was barely above a whisper. βI donβt want to push you, but I also donβt want to pretend like I donβt feel this.β
You swallowed, your own voice trembling slightly. βI feel it too, Joel. But we need to be careful.β
Joel nodded, his expression a mix of desire and restraint. βI know. And I want to respect that. I just...β He hesitated, taking a deep breath as if trying to steady himself. βI donβt want to miss this chance with you. Iβve never felt this way before.β
Joelβs gaze flickered between your eyes and your lips, the desire and uncertainty evident in his expression. His hand gently cupped your face. His touch was tender, as if he were afraid to break the spell that bound you both.
You felt your heart race, every nerve ending alive with anticipation. Joelβs fingers brushed softly against your cheek, and you could see the struggle in his eyes as he fought to keep his emotions in check. His breath grew shallower, and his eyes closed for a brief moment, savoring the closeness.
Slowly, he leaned in, his lips brushing against yours in a soft, tentative kiss. It was gentle at first, a whisper of warmth and affection that sent a shiver down your spine. The moment felt both exhilarating and comforting, the culmination of all the unspoken words and feelings that had been building between you.
You responded instinctively, your lips moving softly against his. The kiss deepened gradually, a sweet exploration of new and uncharted territory. His hands moved to frame your face, his touch firm yet gentle, as if he were cherishing every second of this newfound closeness.
When you finally pulled away, both of you were breathless, your eyes locking in a moment of shared understanding. The kiss had been more than just a physical connection; it was a promise of something more, something that neither of you fully understood yet but were both eager to explore.
Joelβs smile was tender and full of warmth. βIβve wanted to do that since I woke up that day at the infirmary,β he admitted softly, his eyes searching yours for any sign of hesitation.
You felt a blush rise to your cheeks at his confession. His words made your heart flutter even more, and you could see the sincerity in his eyes.
"I'm glad you did," you said softly, your voice barely above a whisper. "I've been feeling the same way."
Joel's smile widened, and he gently stroked your cheek with his thumb. "I didnβt want to rush things or push you. But now... now that weβve shared this, I hope we can figure things out together."
You nodded, feeling a surge of hope and warmth. "I think we can. I want to see where this leads."
He took a deep breath, his gaze never leaving yours. "No pressure, just... being here with you."
You smiled, feeling a sense of calm and excitement. "I would like that.β
Joel nodded; his expression full of affection. "Good. Now, how about we get some rest? Tomorrow's a new day, and I want to spend it with you."
You felt a burst of warmth at his words and, inspired by the new closeness between you, you hesitated for just a moment before speaking up. βHow about we go inside for a bit? Iβve got some tea. It might be nice to relax and talk more.β
Joelβs eyes lit up at the invitation, and he nodded with a smile. βThat sounds perfect.β
You led the way to your house, the familiar surroundings now feeling different with Joel by your side. Once inside, you made your way to the kitchen and began preparing the tea. Joel watched you with an easy smile, clearly content.
As you waited for the water to boil, you and Joel chatted about lighter topicsβhow his recovery was going, plans for the community, and small anecdotes from your days. The conversation flowed easily, and the atmosphere between you was comfortable and warm.
When the tea was ready, you poured two cups and handed one to Joel. He took it with a grateful smile, his fingers brushing against yours. You both settled into a cozy corner of your living room, the soft light of a lamp casting a gentle glow around the room.
Joel sipped his tea, his gaze occasionally meeting yours. βThis is nice,β he said softly. βThank you for inviting me.β
Joel looked around your living room, the peaceful ambiance a stark contrast to the harsh world outside. He took another sip of his tea, then turned his gaze back to you. βYou know, before all this, I had a pretty normal life. A family, a daughter named Sarah. She was... everything to me.β
His voice carried a tinge of sadness, and you could see the pain in his eyes. You nodded, sensing the weight of his memories. βIβm sorry, Joel. I canβt even imagine.β
Joelβs expression was somber but grateful. βThanks. She was everything. When the outbreak happened, she... she didnβt make it. Itβs been hard, you know? Trying to keep going and make sense of it all.β
You felt a pang of sympathy for him, knowing how devastating such a loss could be. βI understand. I lost my fiancΓ© in a storm during the outbreak. We were caught outside, and he was... gone before I could do anything.β
Joelβs eyes softened with empathy. βThatβs so tough. Iβm really sorry you went through that.β
You took a deep breath, feeling the weight of your own memories. βIt was the storm that made me afraid of them. Every time the weather changes, it reminds me of that day. I try not to let it control me, but sometimes, itβs hard.β
Joel reached out, placing his hand gently on yours. βIβm sorry youβve had to deal with that. Itβs brave of you to face it every day.β
You looked at his hand on yours, feeling a comforting warmth from his touch. βItβs been a struggle, but having people like you around makes it a little easier.β
Joel nodded, his gaze steady. βWe all have our battles. But weβve found ways to keep moving forward. And maybe together, we can make those battles a little less daunting.β
+++++
The days turned into weeks, and your relationship with Joel grew stronger. The bond you shared was evident in the way you looked at each other and the ease with which you interacted. People in Jackson had noticed the change in both of you, and there was a sense of warmth and contentment surrounding your partnership.
One afternoon, as you were working in the infirmary, organizing supplies and checking on patients, Joel walked in. He had that familiar, easy smile on his face, and his presence was a comforting one amidst the hectic pace of the medical work.
βHey,β he said, leaning against the doorway. βThought Iβd stop by and see how youβre doing.β
You looked up, your face lighting up at the sight of him. βHey, Joel. Just busy as usual. Howβs everything on the patrol?β
Joel shrugged, walking over to where you were working. βNot too bad. But I figured Iβd come by and keep you company. I know youβve been spending a lot of time here.β
You nodded, your smile softening. βYeah, Iβve been needed here more often lately. But itβs good to see you.β
Joel moved closer, his hand reaching out to gently touch your arm. βIβve missed you. Itβs different when youβre not around.β
You felt a surge of affection at his words. βIβve missed you too. But this is important. People need help, and I want to make sure Iβm here for them.β
Joel nodded, understanding in his eyes. βI get it. Just remember to take care of yourself too. Iβd hate to see you running on empty.β
You chuckled, appreciating his concern. βIβll try. But having you here now brought a smile to my face.β
He smiled, his gaze lingering on you. βWell, Iβm glad to be here. Can I help with anything?β
You thought for a moment, then nodded. βActually, if you could help me restock some of these supplies, that would be great.β
Joel moved closer, his hand gently brushing against yours as he began helping with the supplies. The shared task created a comfortable silence between you, with only the soft sounds of organizing supplies filling the space.
As you worked side by side, Joelβs gaze lingered on you with an intensity that made your heart race. Without warning, he leaned in, his lips brushing softly against yours in a tender, affectionate kiss. The kiss was a sweet proof the connection you shared, and you responded with equal tenderness, savoring the closeness.
Just as the kiss deepened, the door to the infirmary swung open, and Dr. Ramirez walked in. Her eyes widened slightly at the sight of you and Joel but quickly masked her surprise with a professional smile.
βSorry to interrupt,β she said, her tone warm but slightly teasing. βI came to check on things and see if you needed any help.β
You and Joel pulled away; a bit flustered but smiling nonetheless. βWe were just finishing up,β you said, trying to sound casual. βEverythingβs in order.β
Dr. Ramirez nodded, her gaze flicking between you and Joel with a knowing look. βAlright, if you need anything, just let me know.β
As she moved to her office, you glanced at Joel, your cheeks still slightly flushed. βWell, that was embarrassing.β
Joel chuckled, his hand still resting lightly on yours. βYeah, but I guess itβs a good thing everyone know youβre my girl.β
You looked up at Joel, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips. "I suppose it is. Itβs nice to be able to be open about us."
Joelβs expression softened; his gaze warm. βIt is. And Iβm glad we donβt have to hide anymore.β
You squeezed his hand gently, feeling a sense of contentment. βMe too. It makes everything feel more real, more... solid.β
Joel nodded, his eyes never leaving yours. βDo you want to have dinner at my place?β he asked.
You looked up at Joel, a smile spreading across your face at the thought of spending more time together. βDinner at your place sounds wonderful. Iβd love that.β
Joelβs face lit up with a warm smile. βGreat. Iβll make sure to have something good ready for us.β
You both made your way to Joelβs place, the evening air cool and crisp. The walk was filled with easy conversation and shared laughter, a comforting routine that had become a cherished part of your days.
When you arrived at Joelβs house, he opened the door and gestured for you to enter. The interior was cozy, with soft lighting and a welcoming atmosphere. He led you to the kitchen, where a simple but inviting dinner was laid out on the table.
Joelβs cooking was surprisingly good, and as you enjoyed the meal together, the conversation flowed effortlessly. You talked about everything and nothingβyour favorite memories, plans for the future, and the little things that made you both laugh.
After dinner, you moved to the living room, where Joel had set up a comfortable spot with blankets and pillows. You both settled in, the atmosphere relaxed and intimate.
Joel looked at you with a soft smile. βIβm really glad youβre here.β
You snuggled closer to him, feeling a deep sense of contentment. βMe too. Tonight has been perfect.β
He wrapped his arm around you, his touch warm and reassuring. βHereβs to many more nights like this.β
You smiled, resting your head on his shoulder. βIβd like that.β
As the evening wore on, you both talked about your past experiences and shared stories from before the outbreak. Joel spoke about his life before everything changedβhis family, the dreams he had, and the struggles he faced. You shared your own experiences, including the loss of your fiancΓ© and the challenges of adapting to this new world alone.
Joel listened intently, his hand occasionally brushing against yours as if to reassure you. βItβs amazing how much weβve both been through,β he said softly. βAnd yet, here we are.β
You nodded, feeling a deep connection. βYeah. It feels like weβre building something meaningful despite everything.β
After some time, you both decided it was time to call it a night. You stood up, stretching slightly as you gathered your things. Joel walked with you to the door, his presence a comforting constant.
As you reached the door, Joel hesitated for a moment, then gently grabbed your wrist, stopping you from leaving. He looked at you with a mix of hesitation and hope in his eyes. βI was wonderingβ¦ would you like to spend the night here? Itβs been nice having you around, and Iβd love to have you stay.β
You looked at him, surprised but touched by the invitation. The warmth in his eyes and the sincerity of his voice made it hard to resist.
βIβd like that,β you said softly, a smile spreading across your face.
Joelβs expression brightened, and he pulled you into a gentle hug. βGreat. Letβs get you settled in.β
Joel led you to his bedroom, a space that felt both lived-in and welcoming. The room was simple but comfortable, with a bed covered in worn but clean linens and a few personal touches that spoke to Joelβs characterβphotos of his family, a well-loved guitar leaning against the wall, and a small stack of books on the bedside table.
He gestured to the bed with a slightly sheepish grin. βSorry, itβs not much, but itβs home.β
You smiled, feeling a sense of warmth and acceptance. βItβs perfect.β
Joel nodded, his expression softening. βIβm glad you think so.β
You both prepared for bed in comfortable silence, the familiarity of the routine helping to ease any lingering tension. Joel showed you where you could find anything you might needβextra blankets, a lamp for reading, and a small cabinet for any personal items you might want to keep nearby.
As you both settled into the bed, Joel turned off the lights, leaving only a soft glow from a nightlight on the dresser. He slipped under the covers, and you followed suit, the warmth and comfort of the bed providing a welcome respite from the dayβs events.
Joel turned toward you, his eyes meeting yours in the dim light. βIβm really glad youβre here,β he said softly, his voice tender.
You smiled, feeling a sense of peace as you settled closer to him. βMe too. It feels right.β
He reached out and gently took your hand, interlocking your fingers. The simple gesture was filled with meaning, and you could feel the connection between you growing stronger.
βGoodnight,β Joel whispered, his voice carrying a note of affection.
βGoodnight,β you replied, your heart fluttering with contentment.
A few days later, you and Ellie were seated at a table in the bustling dining hall, enjoying a well-deserved lunch. The room was filled with the murmur of conversations and the clinking of utensils, creating a comforting background noise.
Ellie, always full of energy, was animatedly talking about a new comic sheβd found. βYou wonβt believe this,β she said, leaning in with a conspiratorial grin, βbut this one hero has the power to control weather. Iβm telling you, if I had that power, Iβd totally make it sunny all the time.β
You laughed, shaking your head. βSounds like youβve been reading too many comics. But I suppose a bit of sunshine wouldnβt hurt.β
Ellie grinned, grabbing a bite of her sandwich. βTrue, true. But, seriously, how are things going with Joel? You two seem... really happy.β
You smiled, feeling a warm flush at her question. βWe are. Itβs been nice, spending time together. Heβs been really supportive, and I think weβre figuring things out.β
Ellieβs eyes lit up, clearly pleased with your answer. βIβm glad to hear that. Heβs been a lot happier since you two started spending more time together. Itβs like heβs found a new spark.β
You nodded, feeling a sense of contentment. βItβs been good for both of us. Weβre still taking things one step at a time, but it feels right.β
Ellieβs expression turned thoughtful. βI know itβs been rough with everything thatβs happened, but itβs nice to see people finding happiness again. Especially you and Joel.β
You appreciated Ellieβs support and her ability to lighten the mood. βThanks, Ellie. That means a lot.β
Ellie glanced around the dining hall, then back at you with a mischievous grin. βSo, are you guys planning any big adventures together? Or just sticking to the small stuff for now?β
You laughed softly. βWeβre sticking to the small stuff for now. Just enjoying the moments, we have together.β You paused, βIβm still a little bit scared of him waking up hating me again.β
Ellieβs eyes softened with understanding. βI get that. Itβs natural to be scared after everything youβve both been through. But youβre doing great, and Joel is different now. Heβs not going to just wake up one day and hate you.β
You sighed, a mixture of relief and lingering concern in your expression. βI hope youβre right. Sometimes, itβs hard to shake that fear, especially after everything thatβs happened.β
Ellie nodded thoughtfully. βI think you both just need to keep talking and being honest with each other. The more you communicate, the more youβll build that trust. And remember, itβs okay to have those fears. It just means you care.β
You managed a small smile. βThanks, Ellie. Itβs reassuring to hear that.β
Ellie grinned and took a bite of her lunch. βAnytime. And if you ever need someone to talk to or just need a distraction, you know Iβm here. We can have a comic marathon or something.β
You laughed, feeling the warmth of Ellieβs support. βThat sounds like a plan. Iβll definitely take you up on that.β
As you and Ellie finished your lunch, you stood up to clear your plates, the conversation easing into a comfortable silence. Just as you were about to head to the serving area, you suddenly felt two strong arms wrap around your middle, pulling you into a warm embrace. A soft, affectionate kiss was placed on your cheek, making you feel a surge of happiness and surprise.
You turned your head slightly, finding Joelβs smiling face close to yours. βHey there,β he said, his voice full of warmth and affection. βI didnβt mean to interrupt, just wanted to steal a moment with you.β
Ellie watched with a grin, clearly pleased with the sight. βLooks like someoneβs got a fan club.β
You blushed slightly, leaning into Joelβs embrace. βHi, Joel. I was just catching up with Ellie.β
Joelβs gaze softened as he looked at you, his hand gently resting on your side. βI figured Iβd come and see how you were doing. Plus, I wanted to see if youβd be up for a walk later.β
You smiled, feeling content in his arms. βA walk sounds nice. Iβd love that.β
Joel nodded, his eyes twinkling with excitement. βGreat. Letβs finish up here and head out.β
You and Joel exchanged a tender glance before you both started to clear your plates. Ellie gave you both a playful nudge. βIβll leave you two to your walk. Enjoy, and remember, Iβm always here if you need me.β
+++++++++++++
βSo?β you asked, as Joel was smiling in complete silence.
βSo what?β he asked without erasing that smile from his face.
βArenβt you going to talk?β
Joel chuckled, his smile widening. βI guess Iβm just enjoying the moment. Itβs not every day I get to be this content.β
You raised an eyebrow, playfully nudging him. βOh really? And whyβs that?β
He looked at you, his gaze tender. βBecause being with you like this, just walking and talking, itβs exactly what Iβve wanted. Itβs simple and perfect.β
You smiled, feeling a warm glow from his words. βWell, Iβm glad youβre enjoying it. So, whatβs on your mind?β
Joel glanced around, taking in the scenery before meeting your eyes again. βI was thinking about how nice would be if you go to my place tonight. Ellieβs gonna spend the night with Dina and I want to spend the night with you.β
βThat sounds wonderful,β you said with a smile. βIβd love to spend the night with you.β
Joelβs face lit up with a genuine smile, and he took your hand, gently squeezing it. βGreat. I was hoping youβd say that.β He leaned and kiss you on the lips, βNo I gotta go helping Tommy, see you later, sunshineβ
You pouted, grabbing his hand before he could go anywhere βWait? That was all?β
Joel chuckled softly, his eyes crinkling at the corners. βI thought Iβd surprise you with the invitation, and I wanted to make sure you knew how much I enjoy spending time with you.β
You raised an eyebrow, playfully teasing. βWell, I didnβt realize the evening was just an invitation and a kiss goodbye.β
Joel grinned, clearly amused. βAlright, alright. If you want more, I guess Iβll have to come up with something better.β He pulled you into another kiss, this one longer and more lingering.
You smiled against his lips as you pulled away. βThatβs more like it. But seriously, I was looking forward to spending time with you.β
Joelβs gaze softened, and he cupped your face gently. βIβm looking forward to it too. Just had to help Tommy out with something. I promise, Iβll make up for it.β
You nodded, still holding onto his hand. βIβll hold you to that. See you later, Joel.β
He gave you one last smile before heading out, leaving you with a warm feeling and the anticipation of the evening ahead.
+++++++++++++
When you arrived at Joel's place, the sun had just dipped below the horizon, casting a warm, golden glow across the surroundings. Joel greeted you at the door with a welcoming smile and a quick, affectionate kiss.
"Hey, glad you could make it," he said, taking your coat and hanging it up. "Iβve got a few things planned, but we can start with something simple if youβd like."
You stepped inside, feeling the comforting familiarity of Joelβs home. βIβm sure whatever youβve got planned will be perfect,β you replied, smiling at him.
Joel led you into the living room, where heβd set up a cozy area with blankets and cushions. The room was softly lit by lamps, and the atmosphere was inviting and warm. A few candles were flickering on the coffee table, casting a gentle glow.
βI figured we could start with some dinner and then maybe just talk or something elseβ Joel suggested, his eyes reflecting the soft light.
You nodded, feeling content with the simple but thoughtful setup. βThat sounds great.β
Joel moved to the kitchen and returned shortly with a plate of homemade foodβsomething comforting and hearty. He set it down on the table, then joined you on the couch.
As you both ate, the conversation flowed easily, just like it had during your earlier moments together. You talked about your days, your plans, and even some light-hearted topics. Joelβs presence was reassuring, and you felt completely at ease.
After dinner, Joel suggested putting on some music. He rummaged through his collection, finally settling on a classic that he thought youβd enjoy. You both snuggled up under the blankets, the music playing softly in the background.
Joel occasionally glanced at you, his hand resting casually on your knee. The song played, but most of your attention was focused on the comfort of being next to him, the warmth of his touch, and the quiet contentment that filled the room.
Joel turned to you, his gaze tender. βYou know, Iβm really glad weβre doing this. Just being here with you, it feels right.β
You smiled, leaning into him. βI feel the same way.β
Joelβs hand moved to gently brush your hair back from your face. βWhatβs your biggest fear?β he asked out of the blue?
You sighed, leaving his gaze for a moment βYou waking up and forgetting you love meβ
Joelβs brow furrowed slightly at your answer, a mix of concern and curiosity in his eyes. βWhy would you think that? I donβt see any reason why that would happen.β
You took a deep breath, feeling vulnerable as you shared your fear. βItβs justβ¦.you knew I told you we didnβt get along before, in fact you hated me, Joel.β
Joelβs eyes softened as he listened to your concern. He took a moment before responding, his voice steady and reassuring. βI know things werenβt easy between us before. And yeah, I didnβt handle things the best way back then. But thatβs in the past. What matters now is how we are right now.β
He reached out and gently took your hand in his. βThe truth is, Iβve changed. And I see you differently now. I see you for who you are, and I realize how much you mean to me. Whatever those old feelings were? Theyβre gone. What we have now is real, and Iβm committed to it.β
You looked into his eyes, searching for the truth in his words. βBut what if one day you wake up and those old feelings come back? What if something changes?β
Joel shook his head, his gaze intense and full of conviction. βI donβt believe thatβll happen. Iβve come to understand how much you mean to me, and how deeply I care about you.β
He squeezed your hand gently, his expression earnest. βIβm not going to let those fears control us. Weβre building something strong, and I want to keep building it with you. Iβm here, and Iβm committed to making sure we have a future together.β
You felt a wave of relief and warmth at his words. βThank you, Joel. That really means a lot to me.β
Joel smiled softly, leaning in to kiss your forehead. βIβm glad. And if you ever need reassurance, just ask. Iβm always here to remind you of how much you mean to me.β
You nestled closer to him, feeling a deep sense of comfort and closeness. The fears that had been troubling you began to fade as you focused on the warmth of his embrace and the sincerity in his voice.
Joelβs gaze lingered on yours, his eyes filled with a mix of tenderness and resolve. Slowly, he leaned in, his lips brushing softly against yours. The kiss was gentle at first, a careful exploration of newfound trust and affection.
As the kiss deepened, it became more passionate, conveying all the emotions and reassurances that words alone couldnβt fully capture. Joelβs hand cupped your face, his touch warm and reassuring as he pressed closer.
You responded to the kiss, your own hands moving to rest against his chest, feeling the steady rhythm of his heartbeat. The kiss felt like a promise, a shared understanding of where you both stood and where you hoped to go.
When you finally pulled away, both of you were breathless, your foreheads touching as you gazed into each otherβs eyes. The room seemed to fade away, leaving just the two of you wrapped in this moment of closeness.
Joelβs smile was soft, his voice barely more than a whisper. βI needed to do that. To show you just how much you mean to me.β
You smiled back, your heart full. βI needed that too.β
Joel gently brushed a strand of hair from your face, his touch lingering.
After that, everything happened in a flash. Neither of you realized when you removedΒ your clothes, but there was too much desperation in your touch; you wanted to discover how his fingers could leave a mark on you, tracing invisible lines across your body.
He kissed you again, slipping his tongue past your lips, gasping when he felt your fingers running your fingertips across his bare chest, tracing the lines of a map leading to where you couldnβt stop.
With one of your hands, you pulled him down by his neck to hold you against your lips again. Once you tasted them, you couldnβt get over the taste of them over yours, and you couldnβt get over the whimpers he left in your mouth.
He was hovering over you, giving you a passionate kiss. He was between your legs, exactly where you wanted him.
He pulled his lips away from yours for a moment to glance down at you. To appreciate the features of your face and the nature of your body to admire the features of your face, and the nature of your body being displayed just for him right now. You felt the crimson color rushing up to your checks and for a moment you felt embarrassed under his stare, but he smiled at you.
βYou look beautifulβ. He swallowed hard, stroking your cheek with his thumb.
His hands on your tights only increased the sparks in the place you wanted him the most, you wanted to follow the path even when you knew it was leading to a treacherous destination.
You continued kissing slowly as he caressed your thighs with his gently touch, as he wanted to worship your body and devour every single sound coming out from your mouth. He kissed you down over your neck, kissing, nipping your skin between his teeth.
And God, he loved the way you were making him feel. The fact this time was different to everything you had experiencing before. At this moment, you werenβt driving for only passionate reasons, but for caring feelings for each other. You werenβt in a rush and that turned him on. He was hard for you and he wanted to meet where religion was, between your thighs.
This time he was making love because he had drowned himself on your religion.
Both of you gasped aloud the moment he began to push slowly inside you. His hands reached for yours, interlocking them as he kissed you softly, muttering, "You're so beautiful like this". He was mesmerized by the way you were nervously giggling and cocking your head back in delight. He bit your neck, prompting your hands to move up to his neck, and his hands ran down your entire body without a layer of clothing on you, focusing on every thrust and diving deep to ensure he was making you happy.
You opened your eyes and stared back at him, entirely focused on you. You couldn't help but roll your eyes as his hands massaged your breasts while he continued to devour your lips. Your back arched, followed by a moan against his lips. Every thrust felt so fantastic, you couldn't help but think you were in the celestial realm You could tell you were getting closer as you squeezed him and kept your gaze fixed on each other. He pushed harder, one hand caressing your cheek and the other gripping your knee to guarantee you fell apart.
The noises you made drove him insane, as he felt himself reaching the edge of the cliff. He wanted to stare at you under him as you cameΒ and with a loud gasp, he did it at the same time falling over your exposed chest, your heartbeats mingling.
You moaned softly beneath him, and Joel raised his head to look at you, flashing him a cute smile he hadn't tired of, as you kissed him on the lips.
"I love you so much," he replied, gazing at you with admiration. βIβm so in love with you.β
I love you.
Iβm so in love with you.
Those three words were echoing in the shadows of your mind. Your expression softened and you felt your blood rushing. You were sure they had had an impact on you.
βAnd I love you so muchβ you whispered back, your voice trembling slightly with the depth of your emotion.
Joelβs expression softened even further, and he brushed a tender kiss against your lips once more. The connection between you was undeniable, a blend of passion and deep affection that had grown stronger with each passing day.
You rested your head on his chest, feeling his heartbeat steady and strong beneath you. The world outside seemed distant and unimportant in the warmth of his embrace. For a moment, everything felt perfect, and you allowed yourself to fully embrace the love and happiness you had found with Joel.
Joel gently ran his fingers through your hair, his touch soothing. βWeβve come a long way, havenβt we?β
You nodded, your eyes closing as you savored the moment. βYeah, we have. And I wouldnβt change a thing.β
Joelβs arms tightened around you, pulling you closer. βNeither would I. Hereβs to more moments like this, and to whatever the future holds for us.β
You smiled, feeling a deep sense of contentment and anticipation for what was to come. βTo us,β you agreed, your heart full of love and hope.
+++++++++++
The soft morning light filtered through the curtains, casting a gentle glow over the room. You stirred, waking up with a smile on your face. The previous nightβs intimacy and love still lingered, and you turned to look at Joel. He was sleeping peacefully beside you, a contented expression on his face.
As you watched him, you felt a surge of happiness and affection. You reached out, gently brushing a strand of hair from his forehead, your heart full of love for him.
But as Joelβs eyes fluttered open and he met your gaze, his expression shifted dramatically. His sparkly brown eyes filled with love, widened in horror, and a look of confusion and fear crossed his face. He pushed himself up, scrambling back slightly.
βWhat...What the fuck are you doing here?β he asked, his voice trembling with a mix of shock and fear.
You were taken aback, your smile faltering as you tried to make sense of his reaction. βJoel, whatβs wrong?β
No. It couldnβt be that, right?
Joelβs eyes were filled with a pained realization. βOh my god, you came to my house trying to seduce me into sleeping with you?β
You felt a sharp pang of pain at his words, and your heart dropped. The warmth you had felt earlier was replaced by a cold, unsettling feeling.
βNo, Joel, thatβs not what happened,β you said, trying to keep your voice steady despite the hurt. βWeβre in loveβ
He chuckled. βIn love? Me in love with you? I could neverβ he said.
Your chest tightened, and the hurt in Joelβs words felt like a physical blow. You struggled to keep your composure, fighting back the tears that threatened to spill.
βJoel, you canβt mean that,β you said, your voice shaking. βLast night, you said you loved me. We shared something real.β
Joelβs expression was a mix of confusion and pain. βI donβt remember saying that. Last night I was with Loriβ
Thatβs it. You were back at were you used to be.
The weight of Joelβs words hit you like a punch to the gut. You felt a mix of betrayal and heartache, as the realization sank in. The warmth and affection from the night before felt like a cruel illusion.
βSo, what? Youβre saying last night meant nothing?β you asked. The tears you had been holding back finally spilled over. βYou really donβt remember? You donβt remember how we talked, how you told me you loved me?β
βI donβt love you.β He said, sternly.
βBut Iβm your sunshineβ you sobbed.
Joelβs laughter pierced through you like a blade, and you could barely stand the weight of the realization. Each word he spoke seemed to tear away at the fabric of your heart, unraveling the dream youβd clung to so desperately.
The room felt colder, the air heavier, as you fought to control your sobs. Every touch, every shared moment that had once seemed so real was now reduced to nothing more than painful echoes of a memory that never truly existed.
He didnβt remember the stealing glances, the kisses, the touches and the promises than now seemed to fade with the cruel destiny meeting the ending meant to be.
You had taken a risk at falling in love with the version of a Joel who loved you back, and he didnβt exist anymore. He had faded just when he had told you he loved you.
He didnβt remember falling in love with you, he didnβt remember all the time you spent together, and he didnβt remember loving you, but you didnβt think this would hurt this much.
βJoelβ you said, pleading him to remember.
βOut.β He said, gritting his teeth. Β
You stood there, the pain in your chest almost unbearable, as Joel's harsh words echoed around you. The warmth and affection you had shared just hours before now seemed like a cruel illusion, shattered by his denial.
"Joel, please," you said, your voice trembling. "Just think about everything we shared. It was real."
Joelβs eyes were hard, and he crossed his arms defensively. βI don't remember any of it. And I can't fake feelings I don't have.β
You felt a deep, profound sadness, the weight of his words making it almost impossible to breathe. The life you had envisioned, the love you had felt, seemed to slip away like sand through your fingers.
βPlease, justββ you tried to reason with him, but the look in his eyes made it clear that any further pleading was futile.
Joelβs expression remained firm, a mix of regret and frustration. βEverything I know is that you took advantage of me.β
The sting of Joel's words cut deep, each one echoing the finality of a dream you had cherished. The accusation of taking advantage of him felt like a betrayal, intensifying the emotional agony you were already struggling with.
You took a shaky breath, trying to hold onto the fragments of your composure. "Joel, I never did that. We have somethingβ"
Joel interrupted; his voice cold. "I donβt want to hear it. You need to leave. Now."
The finality in his tone left no room for argument. With a heart heavy with sorrow, you nodded, unable to find the words that might change his mind.
You were only on one of his shirts, trying to find your clothes.
You stumbled through the room, your movements disjointed as you searched for your clothes. The pain and confusion made every action feel like an immense effort. Joelβs gaze remained fixed on you, his face a mask of distant resolve.
You found your jeans, but it was crumpled and stained, and you struggled to put it on with trembling hands. The fabric felt rough against your skin, a stark contrast to the comfort you had felt just hours before. You glanced around for your other belongings, the room now feeling foreign and unwelcoming.
βI... I canβt find my blouse,β you said again, your voice a whisper filled with desperation and trembling.
Joelβs eyes flicked to you briefly before he spoke with a tone that brooked no argument. βDonβt worry about it. Just wear my shirt. I wonβt wear it again.β His voice was cold and icy, not more softness as when they used to whisper things on your ear.
The coldness in his words made it clear that there was no room for negotiation or further conversation. You nodded numbly, the shirt you were already wearing now feeling like a heavy shroud setting your skin on fire.
As you finished dressing, you glanced around the room one last time, trying to memorize the space you were leaving behind. The sight of the room, so filled with the promise you fooled yourself onto believing.
There was an intensified the ache in your chest.
Joel stood by the door, his posture rigid as if he were bracing himself for something. His eyes didnβt meet yours, focusing instead on some distant point. The silence between you was heavy with the weight of the broken bond that never existed.
As you pulled on your shoes, your heart cracked completely sank in deeper. You looked up, meeting Joelβs eyes one last time.
βJoel, Iβm sorry for everything,β you said softly, your voice barely above a whisper. βI never meant to cause any harm. I just wantedββ
Joel cut you off with a slight nod, his face still set in a hard expression. βJust go. Please.β
You swallowed hard, the lump in your throat almost making it impossible to speak. The intensity of Joel's gaze, filled with a mixture of pain and indifference, made it clear that any further words would be futile.
With one last, lingering look at him and the room that just yesterday had witnessed three empty words that now didnβt meant anything, you turned and made your way down the hall. Each step felt like a weight lifting off your shoulders, even as the burden of what you were leaving behind pressed heavily on your heart.
As you reached the front door, the cool morning air hit you, providing a stark contrast to the warmth you had felt just hours before. The quiet outside was a jarring reminder of the world that continued, indifferent to the personal turmoil you were experiencing.
With every step, you tried to reconcile the reality you faced with the memories of what you had thought was true, a momentary field of dreams. The pain was sharp and immediate. How would you continue life after losing another love?
+++++++
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tl;dr version: a very frequent and more recent flavor of trans exclusionism, transmisogyny, and transphobia at large has started to bubble up as an overpowering, overwhelming (and fake) acceptance of gnc cis people.
The actual long version:
Trans people, especially trans women, when they want to come out or explore their gender are often met with loved ones, family, or friends telling them "you can just be gnc, you don't know you're actually trans, men can be feminine, you should try that before scary life changes" we often talk about how this is a move by abusive, transmisogynistic people in our lives, who pretend to to care about gnc people, but in reality it's just transphobia manifesting as a false support. They often manipulate trans people into not pursuing transition and then lay on all the manipulation to convince us we were so silly to think we're trans afterwards.
Though there's a lot of people who still see it as honest support for the gnc, most of us are pretty clear that it's transphobic. But, another way this takes form is from other trans people, there are a lot of trans people with internalized transphobia who only view the existence negatively and when you talk about people potentially being trans, you activate their rapid internalized self hate: how can you say that? You can't know someone else's gender! You're forcing them to be trans! Men can be gnc! You're actually the transphobic one!
You also see it take form as things like "egg prime directive." "You can't tell the egg they might be trans!!!" Yes, you can. And you probably should. Trans people are not some mythical once in a blue moon thing. We are everywhere. There's lots of us. Being trans is not a bad thing, it's simply just a thing. Acting like you can't tell people they're trans is treating trans people like we're dirty secrets, a thing to be ashamed of, you're treating it like an insult. The truth of the matter is, telling someone they're exhibiting things associated with trans people can help speed up the process, less dysphoria to agonize over, less confusion as to what's going on, you can help kickstart a path to happiness.
But these people don't. Cuz they don't *want* people to be trans, and very specifically don't want people to be transfem. I don't need to get into the polls that showed most transmascs think telling a friend they might be a trans woman is morally wrong, you've seen it already. I don't need to tell you about how a transfem mentioned a specific person in the media seemed transfem, just for people to harass them (idk pronouns) off the site, just for people to confirm that yes - the individual in the news was likely transfem. And with that realization didn't come an apology, didnt come a new understanding, the trans and "pro trans" harassers stuck to their guns "recognizing transhood in others the way you see it in yourself is the same as transvestigation, the right wing transphobic conspiracy theory!"
This topic has been talked about a lot this past year, with the egg joke discourse, people getting harassed and ran off the site for correctly mentioning someone seems transfem, the constant harassment and blog deletion of trans women, the onslaught of harassment from the transandrodorks and terfs, etc etc. but I feel like it never gets correctly classified as a form of exclusionism. We easily recognize truscum exclusionism as what it is: "youre nb? You don't try to pass? You don't shave? Lol fake trans" it's the blue hair with pronouns schtick. It's gatekeeping the community. But, in the same respect, the "you can't just say people are trans" "it's ok to be gnc!" anti egg joke types of people are just as exclusionary. One end it's "you aren't a true transexual" and the other is "be gnc instead, being trans is a bad thing."
It's the projection of internalized transphobia into a policy. You can't tell anyone they're trans because you don't see trans people as anyone, you see them as weird monsters. That's a really depressing form of exclusion, but exclusion all the same.
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green with envy.
pairing: theodore nott x reader.
request: omg i need more of theo x reader with a hint of flirty draco
song inspiration: jealous by nick jonas.
author's note: ask and you shall receive. here's draco scheming to make theo jealous, which we all know won't end well. happy new year's my loves. we're staring 2024 off with a bang π
βMerlin, they canβt possibly be serious.β Draco muttered in disbelief. βThose two truly arenβt fooling anyone.β
Blaise glanced up from his book, searching for the cause of Malfoyβs offense. The Three Broomsticks was packed, but it wasnβt hard to spot the reason for his friendβs griping. Tucked into a secluded corner of the tavern, you and Theo gravitated towards each other like magnets, leaning into one another, foreheads pressed together, talking and laughing like you were the only people in the world.Β
It had been this way ever since Blaise could remember.
As always, Theo wore that stupid love-struck expression on his face as he listened to you talk, chuckling softly as you waved your arms around animatedly. You, on the other hand, seemed completely oblivious to the pining and yearning coming from Nottβs end. Anyone with an ounce of common sense could see that Theo was clearly in love with you, yet you remained blind to his affections.Β
βTheyβve made it very clear that theyβre just friends,β Blaise replied, repeating the same tired words that you and Theodore declared over and over again over the course of your friendship.
βAnd you believe them?βΒ
βOf course not.β Blaise affirmed as he flipped through the pages of his book once more. βBut who am I to burst their blissful bubble of ignorance?βΒ
βTheyβre clearly in denial,β Draco remarked, watching intently as you picked a nonexistent piece of lint off of Theoβs quidditch sweater. βItβs been seven years of this pathetic teetering between will they or wonβt they territory. I canβt stomach another day of it, Blaise. Someone needs to do something.βΒ
βWhatever half-arsed plan youβve cooked up in that ferret brain of yours, I want no part in it.βΒ
Draco tapped his fingers against the wooden table, a familiar smirk curving at his lips. Blaise sighed in exasperation. He knew that look. He hated that look. It usually meant that Malfoy was hatching a scheme that spelled nothing but trouble for Blaise.Β
βIβm serious, Draco.β Blaise said in a stern voice.
βSo am I,β the blonde replied. βThose two need a push and Iβm more than willing to provide it for them.βΒ
βI already know that Iβm going to regret asking, but what exactly are you planning?βΒ
Draco smirked. Blaise swore to Salazar that there was an evil gleam in his friendβs eyes as he turned over to face him. βIβm going to flirt with Y/N.βΒ
βAre you mental?β Blaise exclaimed. βNott will send you to an early grave. Did you see what he did to Pucey for trying to chat Y/N up? Poor bastard had to eat his meals through a straw for weeks.β
βThen I guess itβs your job to prevent that from happening, Zabini.βΒ
There were a million protests on Blaiseβs lips. Everyone knew that Theo was overprotective of his best friend. It was an unspoken rule that you were off-limits and Blaise had seen first hand the consequences that befell anyone that dared to hit on you. It usually ended with someone in the infirmary and that someone was never Theo.Β
Draco was well aware of this fact as well, but he seemed to have a death wish. Before Blaise could stop him, Malfoy scooped two glasses of butterbeer from the counter and made his way over to you just as Theo excused himself for a smoke. You looked up just as Draco slipped into the booth, sliding beside you to take up the vacant spot your best friend left.Β
βFancy seeing you here, Y/N.βΒ
βHi, Dray.β You greeted the blonde with a smile. βI didnβt know you were here, too.βΒ
βHow could you?β He drawled playfully. βTheodore seems content keeping you all to himself.βΒ
You rolled your eyes fondly. βYou couldβve easily just come over to join us.β
βThatβs exactly what Iβm doing, darling.β Draco set a mug of ice cold butterbeer down in front of you. βAnd I brought your favorite.βΒ
βHow sweet of you.β You beamed, totally unaware of his schemes as you clinked your glass against his. βCheers, Draco.βΒ
βCheers, Y/N.βΒ
The sweetness of the butterbeer lingered on your tongue and the foam rested on your upper lip as you savored the taste. Your tongue peeked out, trying to lick the remnants away. Silver eyes flashed mischievously as he clocked the action, a smirk curling against his lips.Β
βHere, let me.β Draco brushed his thumb over your upper lip, wiping away the foam with ease. His fingers were soft and featherlight and nothing like the calloused feel of Theoβs hands.Β
Your best friend had a bad habit of burning his fingertips from the countless blunts and cigarettes he smoked. Despite the fact that you offered to heal them with magic, Theo always refused. He said it made him more manly. Though you rolled your eyes at him, you found that you didnβt really mind his scars and calluses. It only made him that much more endearing. Why you were thinking of Theo while another man was touching you, you had no idea. Or perhaps you did and you were just in deep, deep denial about it.Β
βHave I lost you, love?βΒ
With a blink, you found yourself staring back at Malfoy. βSorry, Draco. What were you saying?βΒ
βI asked if you were using a new shampoo,β said your friend. He twirled a strand of your hair between his fingers, using the ends to tickle your cheek. βYour hair smells divine.βΒ
You paused, narrowing your eyes at Draco. βWhat are you doing, Dray?βΒ
βIβm not doing anything.βΒ
βYouβre up to something.βΒ
That much was obvious to you. Years of friendship told you just as much. Draco was currently plotting something. Before you could question him further, a shadow loomed over the both of you. When Theo had left for his smoke break, he was carefree and grinning, but now tension colored your best friendβs features. As he glared down at Draco, Theo clenched his jaw and balled his fists at his side.
βKeep your hands to yourself, Malfoy.βΒ
βTeddy, he was just helping me withββΒ
βDraco doesnβt need to help you with anything.β Theoβs eyes flashed with anger, the blues and greens of his irises turning stormy as his gaze dropped to the lock of hair tangled through Dracoβs fingers. βWhat he needs is to walk away before I break his fucking jaw.βΒ
Draco raised his palms up. βI donβt want any trouble, Nott.βΒ
Despite his statement, you sensed that trouble was exactly what Draco was aiming for. Instead of walking away like he shouldβve, Malfoy leaned over and kissed your cheek in parting, which only further incensed Theo. If you hadnβt grabbed hold of the end of his coat, Theo wouldβve hurled himself at Draco and punched the cocky smirk off of your friendβs face.Β
You tugged at Theo and placed yourself between him and Draco, watching as the blonde returned to the table Blaise was currently sitting at. For good measure, he winked at the two of you as though Theo wasnβt already pissed enough as it was.Β
βWhat the hellβs gotten into you?β Theoβs gaze flickered back to you, his eyes darkening as they met yours.Β
βWhy the fuck are you letting him touch you like that?βΒ
The bite in his voice puzzled you. Theo never snapped at you, so you werenβt quite sure how to react. He almost soundedβ¦jealous. Not that Theo had any reason to be. Right?
βWhat are you on about? Draco was literally just wiping the foam off of my mouth. Itβs not a big deal.βΒ
Downplaying the interaction seemed to rile Theo up even further. βYes it fucking is,β he gritted out. βHeβs flirting with you, Y/N. How can you not see that?βΒ
The accusation of Draco Malfoy flirting with you was entirely laughable. Though you were accustomed to Theoβs overzealous tendencies, you usually didnβt mind his overprotectiveness since it deterred creepy guys from making advances towards you. But this was Draco, for Godricβs sake. Youβve known each other since you were in diapers. There was no way in hell he was actually trying to make a move on you.Β
βYouβre being ridiculous, Teddy. Malfoy was not flirting with me.βΒ
βOf course he was! Did you not see the way he looked at you? The bloody git was all over you, playing with your hair, touching your lips. I should his bash his fucking head in for even glancing in your direction.βΒ
The rest of Theoβs rant was incoherent, a mixture between English and Italian curses that drew the attention of those around you. With a grimace, you tugged Theo towards the back of the Three Broomsticks. He continued swearing as you led him away, dead eyes filled with fury as you ushered him into the bathroom.Β
There was a murderous expression on his face as he spewed threats and curses. You locked the door behind you, sighing as you surveyed the angry boy before you. Knowing Theo, his constant ranting would only fuel the fire of his anger. You needed to calm him down before he made good on his promise to pummel Draco into the ground.Β
Unfortunately, Theo had already worked himself up to a fit. A frown was evident on his face, his knuckles turning white as he clenched his fists, the veins on his forearms protruding as violence threatened to spill over. You said his name a few times, but he didnβt seem to hear you. He was too angry to take notice.Β
While dealing with an angry Theo was by no means a new occurrence for you, it seemed harder to pull him out of it this time. You had never seen him this furious. A small part of you was mad at his overreaction, but another part of you was oddly flattered that he cared so much.Β
Perhaps it was foolish to do so, but you relished in the fact that such a small action could elicit such a response from him. If you didnβt know any better, you wouldβve surmised that Theo was acting out of jealousy. His possessive behavior had always given you a strange sort of thrill. It made you feel wanted, it made you feel desired, and that in itself was more dangerous than any drug.Β
βTheodore.βΒ
Theo paced back and forth, contemplating acts of violence against one of his oldest and closest friends.
βTheo.βΒ
He wondered how much trouble heβd get into for beating Draco into a bloody pulp. Would they suspend him? Theo reckoned it would be worth it.Β
βTeddy.βΒ
The sight of Draco brushing foam off of your lips flashed through his mind again, playing on a torturous loop. Malfoy didnβt get to touch you like that. No one got to touch you like that. At least not without Theo breaking every bone in their hand.Β
βOh for Salazarβs fucking sake.βΒ
You grabbed the front of Theoβs sweater and dragged him down to your level. There was absolutely no thought process behind your actions besides stopping his rant. With your lips pressed firmly against his, you accomplished just that. Theo froze for a second, his eyes fluttering close as you kissed him. The tension left his body, his anger melting away to give room for a different sort of heat to spread through him.Β
The minute his body language changed, you pulled away. Theo looked down at you, his dead eyes burning with searing passion. You felt his gaze piercing right through you. There was danger lurking within him. Like he was the predator and you were the prey. Youβve never seen him look like that before. Theo lookedβ¦feral. Theo looked hungry.Β
βIβm sorry, Teddy. I was just trying to calm you downββ
You reeled back as Theo cupped your face in his hands and smashed your lips together once more. This time, there was no surprise in the kiss. There was just fervent passion, arduous desire, and mutual destruction between you. Theo didnβt kiss you like he wanted you. He kissed you like he needed you.Β
As he pinned you against the wall, Theo gripped your hips and pressed his body against yours. The kisses grew sloppy and desperate, the two of you scrabbling for more. You groaned as his erection brushed against your thigh, leaving him the perfect opening to slide his tongue past the seam of your lips. You were vaguely aware of banging into the pictures on the walls, the sound of them clattering to the ground registering somewhere in the back of your mind.Β
The two of you were like a tornado, knocking decor and toiletries around as you continued to sloppily make out. You were sure that you were making enough noise to alert the whole tavern. Yet you couldnβt bring yourself to care as Theo bit down on your bottom lip. You moaned into his mouth as he set you down on the counter. One hand gripped your throat while the other slipped underneath your skirt.Β
Theo dragged you closer by your thighs, wrapping your legs around his waist as he grinded his hardness against your throbbing core.Β
βMalfoy couldnβt touch you like this, bella.β The low rasp of his voice sent shivers down your spine. His hold on you was possessive and utterly fucking sexy. Heat rushed between your thighs as his fingers tightened around your throat. βOnly I can touch you like this. Do you understand, dolcezza?βΒ
βYes,β you answered breathlessly. βItβs you, Teddy. Only you.βΒ
Pleased with your response, Theo smirked as he ripped off your tights. Your eyes nearly rolled to the back of your head when he rubbed his hand against your clothed sex. He palmed you through your panties, swearing when he felt how wet you were for him.Β
βYouβre fucking mine,β he growled against your ear while he slid your panties to the side and teased along your folds. Slender fingers curled inside of you, eliciting a filthy moan that echoed through the walls. βThis is all for me.βΒ
Watercolour eyes seized the breath from your lungs. The declaration hung in the air with finality. There was no room for question or doubt. Theo was merely stating the truth.
You were his. You always have been.Β
Theo withdrew his hand, fingers dripping with your arousal. He refused to break eye contact as he stuck them into his mouth, licking each digit clean.Β
You whimpered, pulling him in by his belt loop. He moaned as you impatiently tugged his jeans down, palming him through his boxers. He felt big. Bigger than youβve ever had before.Β
But you wanted it. You wanted him.Β
βI need you, Theo. Please.βΒ
βIβm yours, Y/N.β Theo panted into your mouth as you released his cock from the constraints of his boxers. βAlways.βΒ
You swallowed thickly as you looked down at his impressive size. His cock was hard and throbbing in your hands, precum leaking from the tip. Theo was massive. You had no idea how he was going to fit. Still, the challenge thrilled you.Β
Spreading your legs open, you bit your lip as Theo positioned the head of his cock at your entrance. He kissed your lips sweetly before pulling back and nuzzling his nose against yours.Β
βDeep breaths, baby.β You nodded, inhaling and exhaling as he pushed the tip in. βYouβre so tight. Gonna let me stretch you wide open, bella?β
Tears pricked at your eyes as he breached your walls, stretching you just between the line of pain and pleasure. βYouβre so big, Theo. I don'tβI don't know if itβs going to fit.βΒ
βWeβll make it fit, Y/N,β he promised, pushing further in and groaning as your walls hugged tightly around him. βJust like that. Youβre doing so well, sweetheart.βΒ
Once Theo was fully sheathed inside of you, his movements stilled. He caressed your cheek and pecked your lips. βCan I move, baby?βΒ
βYes,β you exhaled.Β
βGood girl.βΒ
You fluttered at his words and Theo cursed as your walls gripped him like a vice. βFuck, pretty pussyβs squeezing me so tight. You drive me fucking insane, you know that? I get so jealous of anyone who even looks at you.βΒ
βI like when you get jealous,β you admitted, wrapping your legs tighter around his waist. βYouβre sexy when youβre angry.βΒ
Theo flipped you over so that you were facing the mirror. As you gripped the marble countertop, he thrusted sharply inside of you and watched as your face contorted into pleasure. Whispering praises into your ear, Theo picked up the pace. He intertwined your fingers together and placed each palm against the mirror.
βOpen your eyes, bella. I want you to watch while I ruin you.βΒ
Your eyes snapped to your reflection, taking in your flushed cheeks and mussed hair. Behind you, Theo fucked into you with a punishing pace. He groaned as he watched himself slide in and out of you, relishing at the perfect fit. It was like you were made for him. As your moans grew louder, Theo stuffed his fingers down your throat and gagged you.Β
βGod, fuck.β Theo hissed, his eyes meeting yours in the reflection. βHarder, baby. You can take it. Let me fuck out my frustrations.βΒ
βYou. Belong. To. Me.βΒ
Theo punctuated every word with a thrust, hitting the sweet spot within your walls with each rut.Β
βIβm yours, Teddy.β You said breathlessly. βAll yours.βΒ
He smiled, placing a tender kiss against your neck as his fingers slipped between your legs. Theo rubbed at your clit, urging you closer and closer to your orgasm.Β
βAre you close, principessa? I can feel you squeezing me, milking me dry. Take it all, dolcezza. Youβre mine, but Iβm yours too.βΒ
βMy hands are yours.β Theo squeezed your tits, flicking his thumb over your nipples.
βMy lips are yours.β He angled your chin towards him, claiming your mouth with open mouthed kisses.
βMy cock is yours.β He drove deeper inside of you, making you arch as you cried out his name.Β
Theo swallowed your moans before capturing your lips with his. βMy heart is yours, too.βΒ
βItβs all yours, Y/N.β
Your heart squeezed at his declaration. Nothing had ever sounded more beautiful than Theo pledging every part of himself to you.Β Β
βOh god. Fuck, Theo. Please. Iβm gonna cum.βΒ
βCum for me, bella.βΒ
Stars dotted your vision as the orgasm rocked through your body. Theo kissed your neck, marking his territory, while you squeezed around him. The heat of his touch seared your skin as he held you. If it werenβt for his strong arms wrapped around you, you wouldβve collapsed.Β
βSo fucking perfect,β Theo said between pants. βMy beautiful girl.βΒ
Your name tumbled off of Theoβs lips as he came. It was the sweetest sound youβve ever heard. Coming from the most beautiful boy youβve ever seen.Β
The two of you slid down to the floor. Theo wrapped an arm around you, cheeks red and hair disheveled. His pretty eyes fluttered open as he traced over the hickies and bruises heβd left on your body, admiring each mark gently. With his brows scrunched with concern, he brushed a thumb over the bite mark on your shoulder.Β
βWas I too rough?β Theo whispered, kissing over the spot. βDid I hurt you, Y/N?β
You smiled at his gentleness, smoothing at the worry lines creasing his forehead. βNo, it was perfect. God, you're fucking hot when you're jealous.βΒ
Theo chuckled, kissing the inside of your wrist. The playfulness in his expression faltered as concern and hesitation bled through. βDid youβI mean, fuck, did you enjoy it? I didnβtβyou still want to be my friend, right?βΒ
βNo.βΒ
Theo felt his heart drop down to his stomach. Heβd fucked it up. The one good thing in his life and heβd fucked it up. You brushed your fingers over his cheekbones, tilting his chin so that you were face to face.Β
βI want to be so much more than just your friend, Teddy.β The sigh of relief that he released made you grin. You leaned in, giving him a soft peck on the lips. βMy heart is yours, too. Itβs always been yours.βΒ
The weight of his smile made your heart ache. βNow that you know how I feel, thereβs no need to be jealous anymore.βΒ
βAre you kidding? Iβm going to be even more insufferable now. I need everyone to know that youβre mine.βΒ
βThey already know, Teddy. We were the only ones living in denial.βΒ
βWe made it pretty damn obvious, didnβt we?βΒ
βYou threatened every guy who dared to even look at me.β
βPlease,β Theo started, a smile tugging at his lips. βI saw the dirty looks you gave to the girls who tried to flirt with me.βΒ
You chuckled. βOkay, so maybe weβre both a littleβ¦β
βPossessive? Obsessed? Head over heels insane for each other?βΒ
βAll of the above.β You declared, tugging at his hand. βNow come on, Teddy. Before someone figures out what we were really doing in here.βΒ
βI think they know, love.β Theo teased. βYou were pretty loud.βΒ
βLike you werenβt loud yourself, Nott.βΒ
You rolled your eyes fondly as he helped you up. Theo straightened your skirt and smoothed your hair down, kissing your temple. He reached for the doorknob with one hand and linked his fingers with yours with the other.Β
Fortunately, there werenβt too many people waiting for the loo. You wouldβve been embarrassed to walk out together hand in hand, but Theo made sure that every set of prying eyes quickly found something else to look at. With a cheeky grin, he lifted your knuckles to his lips and placed a lingering kiss upon your skin.Β
As you walked out into the main hall, a wolf-whistle rang out from one of the tables. Draco raised a toast in your direction while Blaise shook his head.Β
βCanβt believe that half-arsed plan of yours actually worked,β Zabini said.Β
Theo furrowed his brows. βWhat plan?βΒ
βThe one where Malfoy flirts with Y/N in an attempt to make you jealous.βΒ
βI knew you were up to something,β you said with narrowed eyes. βWhat an idiotic plan.βΒ
βIs it idiotic if it worked?βΒ
Theo shook his head in disbelief. βYouβre mental, Malfoy. I truly considered tearing you to pieces.βΒ
βYouβre welcome,β Draco said with a smirk. βClearly that jealousy was put to good use.βΒ
The blonde winked at you, making Theoβs fingers tighten around yours. βOh, Teddyβs going to kill you. This time, I have no plans of stopping him.βΒ
Dracoβs silver eyes widened as you released Theo. βZabini? A little help here?βΒ
βIβd start running if I were you, Malfoy.βΒ
Without hesitation, Draco bolted out the door. You snickered as the blonde disappeared down the snowy street, his platinum blonde head bobbing through the crowd. To his credit, Theo gave him a proper head start.Β
βIβll be right back, dolcezza.βΒ
βDonβt be gone too long, Teddy.β Theo smiled, leaning in to press a soft kiss on your lips. βAnd try not to hurt Draco too badly, yeah?βΒ
Despite his pout, Theo nodded as you tugged him down for a proper kiss. He smiled against your lips before peppering kisses on your nose and cheeks.
βFine, but only because you asked nicely, principessa.βΒ
You smiled, watching as Theo chased after Draco. Beside you, Blaise grinned.Β
βItβs about damn time.βΒ
With a flush, you rolled your eyes at your friend. βOh shut it, Zabini.βΒ
TAGLIST
@annaisabookwormΒ @marina468Β @yaraasthingsΒ @the0doresloverΒ @bubybubstersΒ @moony-artemisΒ @natasha887Β @lucyysthingsΒ @criesinliesΒ @bunnymallowoΒ @niktwazny303Β @letmedownslowsΒ @siriuslyalovergirlΒ @wordsarelifeΒ @clairesjointshurtΒ @daydreamingabthar@moonflowersandsparkles
#jealous theo makes me want to chomp on dry wall <3#theo nott#theodore nott#theo nott x reader#theo nott smut#theo nott x you#theo nott x y/n#theo nott imagine#theodore nott x reader#theodore nott x you#theodore nott smut#theodore nott imagine#theodore nott x y/n
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FAKING AN INTEREST
f1 grid x platonic!reader (implied landoxreader) smau
based on this request! (this may need a pt 2 honestly)
warnings: none, just men having the audacity
masterlist the playlist
βο½₯οΎοΎο½₯*:ΰΌ
q.qΰΌ
:*οΎ:*:βΌβΏγγβΏβΌ:*οΎ:ΰΌ
q.qΰΌ
:*ο½₯οΎοΎο½₯β
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yourusername made a new post!
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yourusername what the fuck is a DRS?
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danielricciardo what he say fuck me for?
β€· yourusername hi! im free may 28 if you want to hangout may 28 lmk im not doing anything may 28 please msg me if ur available may 28 so we could maybe hangout or do something may 28 !!
β€· danielricciardo ill clear my schedule - what day did u say u were free?
β€· username1 mad about being labelled as a fake f1 fan only to turn around and flirt with the drivers? is she fr?
β€· yourusername get a job, touch grass?
username2 how does she know them im so confused
β€· username3 she went to school with oscar i think?
logansargeant will you stop posting the worst pictures of me?
β€· yourusername say please?
β€· logansargeant please y/n im begging
β€· yourusername start using the metric system and i'll consider it.
lilymhe come back to williams i miss u
β€· yourusername can i bring lilyzneimer? π₯Ί
β€· lilymhe omg yes!! lily-ception
β€· oscarpiastri @/yourusername dont take my girlfriend to enemy territory tf?
β€· logansargeant enemy? βΉοΈ
yourusername made a new post!
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yourusername congrats on driving fast bestie
tagged: oscarpiastri, lilyzneimer, jensonbutton
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username4 jenson button? what are you doing here?
β€· yourusername forming a danica patrick hate club
β€· yourusername we're discussing gentle parenting tactics for logan <3
β€· logansargeant is this why jenson keeps telling me that sharing is caring??
β€· jensonbutton in my defence i told her it wouldn't work π€·
β€· yourusername we'll see about that - alex_albon do you feel cared for?
β€· alex_albon im staying out of this.
oscarpiastri thank you y/n!
β€· yourusername so proud of u bestie
β€· oscarpiastri i already paid for dinner you can stop pretending to be nice now
β€· yourusername brb faking an interest in our friendship rn
β€· username10 she's never letting that comment go fr
username7 their friendship confuses me but im so here for it
username8 oscar paid? who's shocked
β€· username9 not me!
β€· username10 not me!
β€· yourusername me tbf he usually forgets his wallet
β€· oscarpiastri i leave it on purpose, actually
β€· yourusername gold digger π«΅
username8 she literally only goes to the races so that she can post about it on ig and pretend she knows what's going on
logansargeant you never congratulate me :(
β€· yourusername tf u want me to congratulate u for? brushing your teeth?
β€· logansargeant no one else will :(
username6 where did u find that picture of oscar?
β€· yourusername wdym find? i took it loool
yourusername made a new post!
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yourusername glorified uber drivers
tagged: logansargeant, alex_albon
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logansargeant best biscuits ever
β€· username5 biscuits?? that wasn't very wtf is a kilometer of you
β€· yourusername one of us! π¬π§ one of us! π¬π§ one of us! π¬π§
β€· landonorris one of us! π¬π§ one of us! π¬π§ one of us! π¬π§
β€· alex_albon one of us! π¬π§ one of us! π¬π§ one of us! π¬π§
β€· logansargeant oh! so this is hell!
landonorris cute! don't do it again!
β€· yourusername i snapped the head off yours hoping it was a voodoo doll.
β€· username3 do they hate each other or..?
β€· yourusername yes.
β€· landonorris cancelling our lunch plans
β€· yourusername i was kidding pls dont im so hungry
β€· username4 lunch plans? y'all seeing this???
username6 the picture of logan im dead
β€· yourusername he was modelling for his cookie design
lilymhe i want the alex one
β€· yourusername boxed it up just for u <3
β€· yourusername alex said he'd give it to u later
β€· alex_albon i lied. i ate it. no regrets.
yourusername made a new post!
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yourusername lando norris fakes an interest in the menu
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username5 y/n out here living our dream </3
β€· username6 god i have seen what you've done for others π
β€· yourusername lando eats chicken nuggets with a fork you can have him
β€· landonorris this is defamation, my lawyers will be in contact.
landonorris in my defence, that place was FANCY and i wanted to pretend i wasnβt about to order chicken nuggets and chips
β€· yourusername fancy?? oscar literally ordered a cheeseburger??
β€· oscarpiastri dont expose me like that y/n
β€· logansargeant one of us! πΊπΈπ¦
one of us! πΊπΈπ¦
β€· yourusername it's not funny when u do it <3
logansargeant you never want to go to lunch with me :(
β€· username7 logan try not to get jealous challenge - hard
β€· yourusername i literally had brunch with you like yesterday?
β€· logansargeant ok and?
username11 she is never gonna let that comment go is she. we get it, you know f1.
β€· yourusername why should i?
β€· username11 it wasnt that deep
β€· yourusername why should i give david coulthard the platform to perpetuate negative commentary on women in motorsport?
β€· yourusername why do we keep allowing men to talk down to women with genuine interests instead of providing them with opportunities to excel in the field?
β€· username2 say it louder for the people in the back queen
username1 lando looks so fineeeee
β€· yourusername too bad he sucks at chess
β€· landonorris you cheated!
lilymhe u look so sexy let me take u out π«’
β€· yourusername only if ur paying π«’
β€· lilymhe weβll put it on alexβs card
β€· yourusername sounds good
β€· alex_albon do i have a say in this?
β€· lilymhe no.
β€· yourusername no.
β€· landonorris no.
β€· oscarpiastri no.
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yourusername y/n l/n fakes an interest in getting her degree πΎπ₯
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landonorris that caption isn't even a lie π€
β€· yourusername sorry cant hear you over the sound of me being a graduate
β€· landonorris did you not literally spend the last year asking if youβd βfinish this degree or if it would finish youβ ??
β€· yourusername i literally have a piece of paper that says i finished it
β€· landonorris talk to me when you get a trophy
β€· yourusername ok mr won one race now thinks hes the shit
β€· username4 gagged.
landonorris but fr, congratulations y/n! proud of you always!
β€· username4 always huh? im smelling soft launch
β€· username9 go back to bed grandma
oscarpiastri congrats on reading and writing stuff bestie!
β€· yourusername thanks king! <3
username6 intelligent queen we loveee
username6 suck on that david coulthard.
β€· yourusername he better be sleeping with one eye open
β€· username11 got a degree and now thinks she's better than a literal racing legend
β€· yourusername dude do u like need a hug or something? if i didn't know any better id think you were in love with me
username2 shes so unserious i love her
lilyzneimer congratulations gorgeous!
β€· yourusername congratulations to you too lil <3
β€· username3 hot girls get degrees π€· i don't make the rules
β€· lilyzneimer still cant believe the girl that used to sleep in biology graduated university
β€· yourusername me neither tbf
β€· oscarpiastri same.
β€· yourusername no one asked u vroom vroom
username13 what was your dissertation on?
β€· yourusername net-zero carbon development in race mechanisms and engineering !
β€· username13 oh you SMART smart
β€· landonorris debatable
logansargeant well done! does this mean no more highlighters abandoned on the floor of williams hospitality?
β€· alex_albon please say yes π
β€· yourusername but watching you trip over them was so funny π
ybfusername those 3am library trips finally paid off! π
β€· yourusername jet lagged delirium and caffeine i will miss u
β€· ybfusername im so proud of us
lilymhe graduate, baker, sexiest woman alive - is there anything you cant do?
β€· yourusername have a genuine interest in motorsport π€·
β€· lilymhe wait till they find out you fake an interest in golf too π
β€· yourusername im only there to see u bbygirl
yourusername made a new post!
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yourusername here to watch my friends drive fast cars.
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landonorris well, some of us drive fast cars
β€· alex_albon what are you trying to say?
β€· landonorris speak up a bit i cant hear you from the podium
username8 lando? yn?
β€· username8 i feel like im interupting something
β€· username4 can we let them just be friends and not ruin this pls
lilymhe oh we are so back
β€· yourusername and weβre never leaving! <3
β€· alex_albon oh god
β€· logansargeant please no
β€· yourusername fine, ill leave π
mclaren hope to see you in our garage soon y/n!
β€· yourusername i have always looked good in papaya
β€· username8 admin how much did lando pay u to say that?
β€· mclaren π€«
oscarpiastri williams take her back she keeps slapping my hat across the room
logansargeant you literally told me you're only here to get maxβs autograph and sell it on ebay?
β€· yourusername ok and?
β€· maxverstappen1 poster or hat?
β€· yourusername both please π«Ά
β€· maxverstappen1 bring a pen
β€· username7 what have i just read?
β€· maxverstappen1 im supporting y/n's financial endeavours?
#f1#formula 1#f1 grid#f1 x reader#max verstappen#lando norris#oscar piastri#f1 grid x reader#mclaren#lando norris x reader#lando norris smut#lando x reader#lando smut#lando norris imagine#lando norris fanfic#mclaren f1#lando norris fluff#propertyofwicked#f1 smau#lando norris smau#logan sargeant#logan sargeant x reader
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strawberry bliss (nsfw)
the part 2 to strawberry sweet β€οΈ
summary:Β miguel loves using his strength on you ;)) and this little snippet of you guys watching a replay of his recent game shows just that, with some sweet lil fluff and playful banter :)) and then miguel fucks u so good he hits your factory reset and you go back to being a lil shy babie around him oh no :3
tw: he also finds out you have a daddy kink, mention of shane dawson (derogatory), mention of physical violence (bros a wrestler what did you expect), overstimulation, a bit of breeding kink, heavy praise kink, a bit of humiliation but on the sweet side
A/N: this takes place about a year or so after strawberry sweet, where miguel and reader are in an established relationship and make quippy cute banter with each other
A/N # 2: pls reblog so we can turn more ppl into whores π
π hope you enjoy!Β
===
"BABYY THE COMMERCIALS ARE OVER!"
Miguel runs from the bathroom and meets you in the kitchen, you with the tray of strawberry drinks squealing as he tickles your waist.
"AHH IT'S GONNA SPILL!!!" you scream, and he backs off, smiling as you regain your balance.
You balance the smoothie cups on the tray and move forward, but Miguel blocks your way.Β
"M'scuse me, I have a game to watch," you pout up at him, but he doesn't budge.
"Mister, my boyfriend will be very angry if he finds out I'm late to the game >:( "
"Aww, such a shame, pretty girl... can't I just get a little kiss?"
"Let me through!"
"Can't, hermosa, you gotta say the password right up against my lips~ the password is mwah mwah mwah i love you miguel you're so handsome miguel~"
"You're cheesy," you roll your eyes, and he laughs as you set the tray down in front of the bed facing the TV. "I want the old Miguel back, he was cute and he had actual rizz."
He slumps against the couch. "The Miguel that was a total pervert over your old smoothie girl uniform?"
"Oh my gosh, I totally forgot about the uniform!" You giggle. "I hated it. Did you know on my first day they gave me a size too small and they had the audacity to try and gaslight me by saying I got fat?"
"Fucking weirdos," he pulled you into his arms, your back against his chest." Glad I got you out of that mess, mm?"
"It was just one mess into another, Mig, you made me your sugar baby," you tease, and his face scrunches up.
"Bebita, I may be rich but I'm not your sugar daddy. I'm just two years older than you."
"But think about it, I was sixteen when you were eighteen! Like- that's two years but the maturity difference is huge! That's creepy, Miguel. You wanna go to jail?"
"Ay, por dios. We're in our twenties, we met in our twenties. End of discussion. And I've already been to jail. Twice."
"What?!"
"Ay! ay! end of discussion. The match is starting," he pinches your nose then turns to watch the TV just as the host's opening spiel ends. Miguel feels you sit up in his grip when the crowds on the TV cheer as he comes up on screen, flashing a grin to the audience.
"Ew, who's that?" you mumble, cheeks stuffed with popcorn and Miguel snorts, rolling his eyes.
"That'sΒ me,Β yourΒ boyfriend, the guy who's gonna absolutely obliterate downgraded Shane Dawson in about..." he snaps his fingers just as his opponent comes out on screen. "Fifty-eight seconds."
"I really don't see the resemblance, Miggy, you're just being a bully."
"Y'know," he pulls you closer, absentmindedly kissing your neck as he feels you squirm in his hold. "I don't get how you let the physical violence slide but I compare some white guy to Shane Dawson and you call me a bully."
Your face heats up a little, and you turn away, mumbling shyly. "C-cause you look really badass when you throw them around like that... "
"Mmm?" he teases, nuzzling his nose in your neck. "I do?"
He feels you freeze up and chuckles, his hands trailing down to your thighs.
"Y-yeah," you whisper... "a bit..."
"Oh, and you like how strong I am, hmm? Is that what it is?"
It's cute how you shake your head and brush his hands away to turn up the volume on the TV, when he just goes right back to kneading your breasts and riling you up.
"Querida, you gotta answer me, y'know I can't understand you when you mumble like that~"
"What was the question?" you mumble, looking up at him with what he knows for sure are the most adorable bunny eyes he's ever fucking seen.
"I said," he nibbles down on your ear with a little growl, "do you get off like a cute little bunny when I show off? Is my baby that kinky~?"
" I-I... maybe..." you twitch as his fingers toy with your nipples. "Miggy, please..."
"Please what baby? Please stop or please give me more?"Β
Miguel knows the answer, obviously. It's just that he can't get over the fact that he landed the prettiest girl with the cutest stutter when she's nervous.
"Please..." you whisper.
He chuckles against your ear, leaning in and lowering his voice just the way he knows you like it, especially when he's buried all the way inside you.
"Please what."
The tiniest gasp comes out of your lips. "Please... please f-fuck me... please?"Β
Before you can even finish, you're over his shoulder and on the bed as he kisses everywhere on your face, growling at the inconvenience of the fact that he cant hold you still and fondle your chest at the same time.
"M-Miguel..." you whimper, twitching in sensitivity. "You're always teasing me..."
"Oh?" he mocks you, flipping you over on your stomach and gripping your hips, leaning in real slow to drawl darkly in your ear. "I'm the tease here? When you're shaking your little ass all over me? You rile me up like this and expect me not toΒ fuckΒ you the way you deserve? hmm?"
"S-Sorry..." you mumble, and Miguel laughs breathily, having the time of his life making you all shy and embarrassed.
"S'okay, baby, you just gotta make up for it, yeah?"
With a playful swat to your ass, he rips off your shorts and his fingers tease your folds through your panties.
"Miguel..."
"Yes...?" he kisses the arch in your back, smirking when your thighs tremble.
"Please hurry..." you gasp.
"Don't worry baby, you'll be asking me to slow down real soon~"Β
===
His favorite sight of all time is you underneath him, with that blissed out look on your face and your chest heaving as he fucks every choked breath out of those pretty lips.
"Fuck, bebita," he whispers. "Creaming all over my fingers like the cute little plaything you are?"
You whimper, closing your thighs shakily, but his free hand just forces your legs apart and he curls his two fingers in you, tickling your pussy and making his hand even wetter.
"Hmm? What did you say?" Miguel mumbles close to your ear, and makes sure that at the precise moment you try to speak he speeds up his fingers, making your words melt away in warm red pleasure as more juices coat his fingers.
"S'too much..."
"Bebita, you asked for this," he whispers darkly. "We're not even halfway done."
You mewl out his name and turn your head to the side. He takes it as an opportunity to bite down on your neck and relish in the high-pitched pleasure drunk squeal that forces out of you as your little pussy sucks in his fingers.
"Shit. I can't take it anymore," he grumbles, his fingers moving even faster as he leans closer, forcing you flat against the bedsheets as you moan and cream all over his fingers like a cute little bunny, just too pleasure-drunk to utter even a word.
"Come for me baby," Miguel almostΒ begs. "Come for me so I can fuck you the way I know you want me too, okay?"
You gasp at his dirty talk, and he laughs at the fact that you never stop getting shy when he says these things.
Or when your little pussy makes those wet noises when you'reΒ really reallyΒ close.
"Fuck you're so cute," Miguel grins, licking the tears falling from your hazy eyes. "So sweet, letting me do whatever I want with you~ Come for me, gatita, you know you want to~"
Your moans make him grin and he thumbs at your sensitive little bud. His teasing sends you over the edge and you gasp and whimper, clinging onto him as he helps you through your third orgasm.
When you come down from it, Miguel is smirking down at you, and licking his fingers clean of your juices, humming lowly as his tongue traces his long fingers sensually.
"Wanna taste it right off your pretty pussy baby," he whispers, making you blush. "But I'll save that for later~"
He really means he'll save it for when you're too fucked out to close your pretty legs around his head.
Miguel kisses your hips as he flips you over again, tracing his rough hands over your ass and thighs, making you shiver and mumble something he almost can't hear.
"Daddy..."
His wandering hands freeze.
He grins.
"What was that?" he teases.
Your breath stutters.
"What- I-"
He leans in dangerously close, pinning you down on the bed with your ass right against his throbbing hard cock.
"What did you just call me?" he drawls, and you whimper.
"I-I called you Daddy," you bury your head in the pillows. "S-Sorry... if it makes you uncomfortable-"
Miguel thrusts his hips forward, sinking halfway into your wet, warm little cunt. The squelching of your little hole is nothing compared to the pure, unadulterated, sinful noise of pleasure that leaves your lips.
"Oh," Miguel groans. "That made me reallyfuckin' uncomfortable alright."
Your thighs shake as he sinks inΒ really really slowly,Β making sure you feel every inch of him stretch you out.
"Say it again."
You gasp, tears forming in your eyes. "It's embarrassing..."
"Fuck, you really have to do all these things that make you so lovable, huh?" He groans, pulling your wrists and holding your arms behind your back. "Got the cutest little face, the cutest little pussy, and you always got these little kinks that make you soΒ cute~"
He starts moving his hips, making you slur out his name and clench around him.
"My cute little milkshake girl, doing all these cute things for me and no one else," he whispers, and you nod helplessly,
Miguel runs his hands up and down your waist, making you sigh and whimper into the pillows.
"Wanna repeat what you said? No one's around, baby, just you and me. No need to be shy~"
"Daddy..."
"Fuck,Β you really are such the perfect little cutie, aren't you?" Miguel teases, pounding you harder.
It's music to his ears when you finally get toΒ thatΒ stage of it, just uncontrollably whimpering and moaning and making all these noises of pleasure as you let him do whatever he wants to you.
"C'mon, say it again, another time won't hurt~"
"Such a t-tease..." you whine, and he chuckles fondly, pressing a kiss to your sensitive neck.
"Sorry, baby, not my fault you're soΒ fuckingΒ adorable," he groans, shuddering when you clench down on him. "Daddy's close, baby, wanna come with me? Feel good together, hmm? Can you even understand me you dumb little baby?"
Miguel coos as you take in high-pitched breaths and gasps. Your tiny fists clench the sheets shakily, and your thighs thump helplessly with every thrust of his hips.
"Come back to me, baby," he whispers as his thrusts get sloppier. "Help me out one list time, kay? Wanna be my good girl?"
"Mhm..."
"Ah," he laughs. "Daddy broke his pretty baby so bad? Sorry, gatita, you just feel too good. Let's come together, okay? I'll get us there, baby~"
You whimper loudly one last time, creaming helplessly around his cock. Miguel pins your back down onto the bed, leaning in and growling right against your ear as his orgasm takes over as well, making sure you take every bit of his cum inside you.
The twitching of your thighs finally slows as Miguel pulls out, turning you onto your back and lightly running his hands up your thighs, waist, and breasts, kneading them softly and eliciting a whine from your lips.
"So sensitive," he pinches your nipple, making you gasp. "But I'll keep my hands to myself...Β for now."
You blush at those words, nuzzling into his neck as he chuckles at your bashfulness.
"Didn't know my good little girl had aΒ Daddy kink. So cute," he whispers. "Got the sweetest little baby all to myself~."
Miguel brushes his lips against yours, smiling when he tastes a hint of strawberry,
HisΒ second favorite sweet thing in the goddamn world.
"Oh, baby~" he coos. "You felt so fucking good. Can we go again, gatita?"
You whimper, twitching helplessly, and blushing at the feeling of his fingers toying with the cum trickling down your thighs.
But you don't say no.
#atsv miguel#miguel o'hara#miguel o'hara smut#miguel oβhara smut#miguel o'hara x reader#miguel spiderverse#miguel spiderman#miguel x reader#spiderman 2099#clndstnlki's strawberry sweet saga
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Lando is secretly dating a girl he knew from high school, and she meets Daniel Ricciardo at one point, Lando brings y/n to a race very discreetly and there is some jealousy with Daniel and it ends up with a quickie in his motor room, and lastly their relationship is exposed in some way
PleaseβΊοΈ
You're mine and it's time to let them know II Lando Norris x Reader ββ½β
SUMMARY: Lando has loved nothing more than to have you all to himself for so long but it only takes Daniel Ricciardo to make sure the world hears you scream you're his.
WARNINGS: **18+**
A/N: I switched the request a little I hope you don't mind It just sort of worked better in my mind like this ;)
"You ready darling?" Lando walked into your shared bedroom after the last-minute business call he had to take. "Woah." He bit his lip eying you up and down.
"No baby...I know that look we're already running late." You couldn't hold back the smirk at the way you saw your boyfriend looking at you knowing that look would only lead to another and you'd both end up wrapped up in the sheets soon after.
"What? I don't know what you're talking about." Lando feigned innocence although he walked towards you wrapping his hands around your waist loving the way you felt in his arms especially when you looked like this.
"Lando." You said his name in a warning tone as you finished putting your earrings in.
"It's times like this I hate that we're a secret...how am I supposed to keep my hands off you tonight?" Lando pouted, his usual child-like behavior showing.
"Well you've done for 6 years I'm sure you'll manage another night." You smiled grabbing your boyfriend's hand before guiding him out.
"At least let me kiss you." Lando stopped and pulled you back you as you were about to open the front door.
"I just put lip gloss on." You pouted this time.
Lando obviously didn't find a problem with this as he happily took your pout as an invitation to close the space between you both and kiss you a little more intensely than you'd thought he meant.
By the time he pulled away, Lando knew he had left you in a daze. "Lan-" your breath skipped as you saw the lip gloss around your boyfriend's lips.
"That should do for a few hours," Lando smirked as he took his fingers wiping the gloss that had spread around your lips and proceeded to use the back of his sleeve to wipe the excess around his own lips before exciting through the front door.
________
You arrived on separate cars not being new to the hundreds of cameras that would be waiting at the entrance to the gala. After so many years of hiding their relationship, everything was rehearsed when they were in public.
It was fun, you thought almost like your own Hannah Montana movie. People knew who you were, completely aware to your ties with Lando from being classmates in high school to working together in the same industry now.
That's at least as much as the public knew. They weren't familiar with the longer version of the story where Lando and you had actually been more than classmates in high school and were in fact in a long relationship and had mutually decided to work in the same industry to stay together.
Lando of course had always dreamt of being a driver and wanting to stay close to him but also sharing a passion for communication you'd been offered a job as communication manager for McLaren allowing you to stay close, but not close enough for people to suspect there was more.
So thankfully it also wasn't odd for you to appear at the F1 gala as you had been invited ever since you'd started working with McLaren.
What was unexpected though was the fact that a certain someone would take the opportunity to make a move now that he wasn't going to be in the team anymore.
"You look beautiful." Daniel walked to you a drink in hand before he took another one from a passing waiter handing out glasses of champagne.
"Thank you, Dani, you clean up well too." Daniel handed you the new drink as you chose to reply kindly not a stranger to men trying to hit on you but another driver was certainly new territory.
"You know when we were working I was certain you had to be seeing someone but coming to the gala with a dress as gorgeous as this without someone by your side...that is a surprise." Daniel was a lot more intense than you'd expected making you choke on your drink.
"Uhmm...actually-" You were interrupted before you could come up with something.
"y/n come dance with me." Lando walked up to you placing his hand low on your back which took you completely by surprise.
"I was actually hoping to dance with her myself-" Daniel laughed with Lando except Lando didn't seem to find the humor.
"Hmm was always faster wasn't I?" You gasped at the insinuation and watched Dani's smile drop but before you could say anything else Lando had taken your hand and was taking you somewhere.
"Lando!" You shouted after your boyfriend who didn't seem like would stop until he got to his destination.
Lando didn't stop until you were both in a secluded hallway.
"Lando what the fuck wa-" But before you could say anything else Lando had pulled you in holding your waist tightly into him and kissing you passionately.
"You're mine okay? I'm tired of hiding it." He whispered and you could feel his breath tickle your lips as you tried to process what was happening.
"Lan where did this come from?" You weren't exactly opposed to the idea of finally going public but you certainly didn't think today would be the day.
"I just...I'm having a hard time keeping my hands off you in this dress." Lando smirked repeating his words from a few hours earlier before he took your hand once more pulling you into the men's bathroom and locking the door after him.
"Lando what has gotten into you!" Your smile deceived you as Lando picked you up and sat you on the bathroom counter.
"Can't a man just show his girlfriend how much he fucking loves her?" Lando smirked as he kneeled in front of you and wasted no time in attacking the space between your legs.
"Ahh-" You were breathless in seconds as Lando licked at your clothed clit for a few seconds before shoving your panties aside and sucking you directly.
"Let me see you baby-" Lando seperated his lips from you for a few seconds and you knew exactly what he meant.
You shimmied the straps of your dress off your shoulders letting Lando see your bare chest as his hand came up to cup your left boob.
"Lando please fuck me-" you begged your boyfriend as you felt yourself getting close.
"Only because we need to be quick pretty girl." Lando obliged coming up to kiss you and letting you taste yourself on his lips as he aligned himself with you.
"Mhm-" you moaned into your boyfriends lips as he pushed into you starting to set a pace immediately.
"How does that feel baby?" Lando asked.
"Mm so- so ahh-so good Lando-" You were struggling to formulate words with how good he could make you feel.
"That's it darling, let everyone hear who you're screaming for." Lando grunted.
"AHH LAN!" You weren't able to contain your volume as Lando quickened his pace without previous warning but something told you he intended for this to happen.
"Who's making you cum baby?" Lando asked as he could feel you start to clench around him.
"Ah-Ah- you- you Lan-only you-" You moaned not even sure how loud you were being but quite frankly you didn't care.
"Fuck...that's it." Lando was satisfied enough as he slowed his pace after fucking you through your orgasm and finishing himself. "That's it, darling." He kissed you softly, a clear contrast to the way he'd just fucked you seconds before.
"Everyone's gonna know now Lan-" you commented as you pulled the straps back over your shoulder and Lan cleaned you up gently.
"That was the idea yes-" Lando smirked proudly planting a kiss to the inside of your thigh before pulling your dress down and patting it down for you.
"Was the idea everyone or Dani?" You asked laughing to yourself knowing how childish your boyfriend could be.
"Hmm let's say one of those was an added bonus" He winked as he watched you fix your hair and tried to clean yourself up a bit.
"You're insane." You turned to face your boyfriend.
"And you still said yes." He smiled before kissing you once more, proudly wrapping his arm around your waist and enjoying the rest of the night unashamedly with you by his side.
A/N: This is the first time I do a twitter au on Tumblr but don't expect them frequently cause I hate doing them I just thought it went well with this story ;)
#f1 x reader#f1#f1 imagine#changetyre#f1 one shot#f1fic#smut#f1 smut#f1smut#formula 1#lando norris#lando norris x reader#lando norris smut#lando norris imagine#lando norris fic#fi driver x reader
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i'll make a proper full post for this but basically
we're gonna be going to community college soon, and we quit our job at applebees as a host because i realized our knees were starting to get absurdly fucked up, and we were already heavily disabled and if we continued to fuck up our knees we would not be able to work anymore entirely forever so yeah
we were gonna need assitance anyways because we were doing part time min wage, and i'm already looking for a new job and got some good ideas on where to look but while we do that and go to school again, gonna need rent/food/uber help
very very very soon we wont be needing to make so many donation posts and may be able to stop making them entirely which is my goal because i really hate relying on kindness not just because it's not relilable, but because it's a major blow to our ego and we were raised in a "pull yourself up by your bootstraps" household which is absurdly unrealistic but you know how it is man
rent is 1300 as always, plus food(we got groceries today thouugh :3) and we're still trying to get a bedframe for about 125 plus shipping and whatnot, and rent is due on the first(17 days from now). we also need to get our phone's screen repaired bceause it has gotten dangerously cracked and i do not want it to break on us when we need it for so much. also i refuse to upgrade to a different model
once again within the next few months we should be able to cut off these donation posts entirely and focus on just our normal bullshit and yeah
0/1300
ko-fi: https://ko-fi.com/tf2heritageposts (our podcast is on here for 1/month and has two episodes so far, plus our commissons)
cashapp: $theteufortdozen
venmo: @theteufortdozen2
paypal: https://www.paypal.me/blucheavy3
if you use any other payment method not listed here, dm us
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ππ¨π―π ππ πππ¬π¬, ππππ ππ ππ¨π«π
Farleigh Start x Fem!Reader
Summary: Hating Farleigh had never stopped him from using you
Content Warnings: Language, Fwb, Forbidden Relationship, Unedited, Dark Fic, Dark Humor, Coarse Jokes, Jealousy, Possessiveness, Smoking, Weaponizing!Ollie, Smut (+18), Minors DNI, Slight CNC, Breeding, Neediness, Exhibition Kink, Grinding, Extreme Degradation, Humiliation Kink, Praise Kink, Hate Sex, Hair Pulling, Rough sex, Messy Sex, Spitting, Orgasm Control, Dirty Talk, Choking
He'd definitely bully me if he was real, and I'd be in love with him
"It's not like we're actually going to eat anything. Mother only insists we all make use of the furniture," Venetia's rambling is incessant as she walks briskly into the dining hall. You know her irritation is the by-product of the undiagnosed anxiety that comes with being forced into an uncomfortable Dior slip on such short notice.
In all fairness, you weren't doing so well either. The dress you are currently wearing is just as suffocating and Venetia's Saint Laurent heels dig into your bone. Your outfit is a velvety, laced up nightmare.
A torture chamber.
You wholeheartedly wanted to crawl into your own bed and forget about everyone and everything. In fact, the only thing keeping you mildly excited for dinner with The Henrys happens to be-
"Gentlemen!" You exclaim, before cleverly adding, "And you've brought Farleigh with you."
You all congregate at the left side of the dinner table, while the Henrys and The Henrys wives all mill about the dinner party. There are'nt any rules to things like this. It's all so self explantory.
What was not all too self explantory was your seating positions. Venetia forces you to sit in between herself and a very vexed Farleigh.
"How interesting," Farleigh barely addresses you in his tired monotonous lilt, "You're almost, nearly, just about, decently dressed." You bristle as you lower your behind to your chair, all while Farleigh shoots you a tight-lipped smile.
"Wow!" Your words drip with sarcasm, promptly halting Farleigh from flirting with the man to his immediate left - one of the Henrys closeted sons, no doubt. "That almost, nearly, just about sounded like a compliment!" You exclaim before leaning over beside him in a daring display of confidence. You place your hand tentatively on his thigh before whispering, "Am I going to have to use my rape whistle?"
Farleigh's scoff sends a string of lightning shooting down your spine.
"You're such a slut, I think you'd enjoy probably enjoy it." His breath is hot against your cheek and would be considered vile.
It should be vile.
Why can't you bring yourself to find Farleigh as vile?
With his elbows lowered underneath the table like a good little gentleman, Farleigh lets his fingers crawl tentatively over your thigh.
The games are on.
Your heart is beating at a million miles an hour with your mind reeling at not only Farleigh's large warm palm finding its home on your ample thigh but his words.
They are in complete contrast to everything you two have experienced together thus far on your stay in Saltburn.
As his fingers inch their way towards your inner thigh you're absolutely breathless. All you can think about is your escapade in the pool the evening before.
Both Catton siblings had been immersed in a very Catton argument, leaving you and Farleigh to your own devices on the banks of the stone pool.
With both your arms leaning over the ledge of the pool and Farleigh pressed to your side, no one could barely tell that Farleigh already had two digits dipped inside your weeping cunt. His hand moved slowly and deftly, so as not to cause too much of a stir in the water and give you two away. And he did it all while leaning his free hand out of the pool, cradling his copy of Jane Eyre with his eyes glued on the pages.
"F-Fuck Farleigh, can I cum?" He sighed at your agitated state.
"Not until I'm finished with Chapter 18." He mumbled almost distractedly, as if your needy voice was something akin to a pesky fly interrupting his reading.
Chapter 18, as you'd probably guessed, had never ended.
His cousins were back from their argument and his fingers left your cunt just as quickly. You had both went back to pretending to hate each other and you were left to 'rub one out' in the safety of your room like some hormonal teenager.
You truly are furious with him.
"What's this I'm hearing about a rape whistle?" Felix pipes up from the other side of Farleigh, equally dressed up all spiffy for the Henry's "You didn't rape anyone, did you?"
Farleigh's response is more of a hiss, "Of course I didn't-"
"Surely there must be more savory topics of discussion at the dinner table other than rape?" Comes the quick mediation of Elsbeth, who sits at the head of the table, clutching her string of expensive pearls as if they weilded the power to rid her of all these insolent little kids.
"Of course there is," you exclaim before turning your head to smile at the presence beside Ventia, nestled quietly in his seat like a little pauper.
Farleigh's manicured fingernails sink half moons into the skin of your thigh, peeking up from the slit of your dress as you lean away from him and say, "You must be Oliver! It's a relief to see another commoner around here." It was so undeniably petty to weaponize Farleigh's greatest foe, but the vexation of not being made to cum the night before still hangs heavily on your shoulder. And at the end of the day, you really just were a petty bitch.
"It's a pleasure to meet you, Ollie!" Slightly leaning over Venetia, the boy looks pale. As if he was biting down on his words. God, his tongue must be riddled in scars.
"Pleasure to meet you." Oliver cooly mirrors the warm and inviting smile stretched across your face.
"Don't lean over me," Venetia mumbles, "I'm not a child."
Meanwhile, Farleigh scoffs once again. While he injects himself in your conversation, his hands move swiftly to cup your vagina, nearly raking a gasp out of your throat in the process. "She won't sleep with you, mate." his brown eyes are trained on Oliver's. "She's a slut but not that big of a slut."
The extreme degradation laced in Farleigh's voice is enough to have you nearly moan out in front of all your friends, their family, and all the bloody Henrys.
Farleigh knew exactly which buttons to push to have you melting catastrophically against his fingers. He knew what words could have you slipping into subspace and he knew how to get your cunt weeping.
"Jesus Christ, could we not do this right now?" Venetia asks, staring pointedly at her cousin, and not at the sight of your legs parting to further accomdate his lazy rubbing against your cunt.
"I'm sorry, Cousin," Farleigh replies, "but it's not my fault your best friend is a raging bitch."
A breathless chuckle escapes your clenched teeth, "I-I'm not a-"
"Yeah, I am so completely done with this conversation," Venitia says, before strangling the stem of her wine glass and chugging it down as if it was nothing but water.
You turn back to hiss into Farleigh's ear, "You're such an a-asshole-"
"Say that again but don't sound like you're on the verge of squirting on my fingers in the middle of dinner." His grin is shadowed by the dimness of crystal chandlier and all the little candles posted along the table. "This is what you get for being a bitch," he says, socasually it makes you break your resolve by shifting in your seat, to better grind your cunt against his fingers, even for a mere second.
It's almost enough to make you cum right then and there.
"Oh-ho!" He aims a guffaw at the sky, "You really are a needy little slut-"
"This dress is shit," you suddenly push yourself out of your chair, creating the minimal noise of wood scraping against the floors. Most eyes are on you and Farleigh slyly removes his hands from in between your thigh. He leans over the table, bringing his fingers to his lips before spreading them over his gums like you would cocaine.
"I have to go change." You say to Venetia, before promptly (and very rudely) bowing out of the dinner.
A few seconds later, you hear Farleigh mumble something about needing a smoke and your heart rattles wildly in its cage. His footsteps are brisk behind yours, and you can feel his eyes sinking into your figure.
While your feet carry you to your destination and you let your brain catch on, you're already sneaking into Farleigh's room.
"Ah! Trespasser!" He exclaims excitedly behind you, with his hands stuffed in his pocket.
"You're so fucking annoying!" Your complains barely escape your throat before he's attacking you in a sloppy, open mouth kiss. He steals the air right out of your lungs, until he's breathing for the both of you. Farleigh slips out of his Abercrombie suit blazer, discarding the material as if it truly meant nothing to him.
His hands are everywhere, with special interests in your breasts compressed tightly by the uncomfortable stitching of your dress.
"This dress..." you mumble distractedly.
"Fuck this dress." He says, and you wholeheartedly agree. Perhaps it was desperate of you to turn in haste. Lifting the ends of your hair to present the zipper to him.
"You look fucking ravenous." He admits in a grave whisper, with his lips grazing the side of your neck, "I wanna fucking eat you." He says, "I wanna be inside you."
"You have such a dirty mouth, Farleigh," the groan that escapes his throat as he zips down your dress lets you know that you may have found your way in.
As the dress spills around your heeled feet, followed by your lacey underwear, Farleigh reattaches his full lips to the skin of your back. "What did you say?" His voice is like the rough gravel encircling Saltburn and you let your eyes roll to the back of your head as you arch backwards against him. His hardness presses against your ass and your fingers weave their way into his curls.
"I said youre a dirty boy, Farleigh." He ruts against you, almost as a second thought. "A dirty fucking boy,"
"Fuck," his hands dig into your hips, rubbing you against him. All as he pleases. "Fucking, fuck. I'm not gonna cum like this-" He says suddenly before spinning you back around.
It is few and sparse moments when you're reminded just how much taller Farleigh is than you and eventide it happens, the wind is knocked out of you. Farleigh advances on you like a literal predator until you're forced to fall backwards on his bed.
He barely undoes the bowtie, and only a few buttons go loose enough to showcase the beautiful expanse of his chest.
"You're absolutely soaked aren't you?" He asks, hovering on the bed above you.
"I need to cum, Farleigh, please-" You knew it was the only way to get what you wanted. You had unashamedly resorted to begging for a man who hooked his nails into your hair, forcing you to sit upright as he parted your legs.
"Look at you," he whispers before cackling maniacally. "You're so stupidly wet, you filthy fucking girl-"
"O-oh fuck, Fuck Farleigh," Your try by all means to grind your cunt into the mattress but is doesn't happen.
"When are you going to learn that I own your orgasms?" He whispers, with his other hand furiously undoing the belt of his fitted pants. "You don't cum until I say. You don't touch yourself until I say. You don't even fucking think about cumming until I say-"
"You're such a big little baby," you spit back, "A big needy, little b-"
You're once again pushed backwards and Farleigh's mounting you with his leaking cock locked tight in his fist.
You automatically lift your legs to present your cunt to him and he groans at the sight.
"I'm going to cum inside of you." He promises.
"I want you too."
Farleigh's eyes are heavy as he slides himself inside you. He looks down at you like you were the most precious thing in the world to him. A treasure trove.
"Fuck- I need you to carry on talking." Farleigh says before shutting his eyes tightly. "Fuck you feel so good-"
"You're doing so well, baby," his hips rut inside you, accidentally pushing his cock in way too deep, way too fast and you both hiss and moan. "Such a good boy," you say with your hair finding his own curls, "You're being such a good fucking boy, Farleigh-"
"Open your mouth," you comply robotically. Farleigh places his hands on the underside of your chin before tipping your head backwards. His chains dangle above you as you stick your tongue out and he spits directly into your mouth. "Such a slut," he says, "Such a filthy fucking good girl." His words have you grinding your cunt against his cock until soon, you're both on the precipice of cumming.
"F-Fuck-"
"Such a good girl," he whispers, with his breath ghosting yoir face and the sound of skin slapping against skin only grows louder and louder. "S-So fucking good-" He whispers over and over again until your cunt clenches around his cock, promting Farleigh's orgasm with a quickness.
His cum spilling inside you has you slipping unceremoniously into your own orgasm and Farleigh wails in both the pleasure of your cunt milking him dry, or your fingers still pulling his hair like crazy.
"Fuck!" He exclaims before slumping on the bed beside you, "Get your fingers out of my hair, you psycho-"
"You love it, though," there's a teasing lilt in your voice, and all Farleigh does is scoff before patting down the pockets of his pants.
"You give me endless reasons to smoke," he says, before tipping his head back, unknwongly leaning into your embrace as your fingers coil through his soft curls.
"You'd smoke anyway."
#saltburn#saltburn x reader#saltburn smut#saltburn x you#farleigh start#farleigh saltburn#farleigh start x reader#farleigh start smut#oliver quick x reader
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I miss brewer harryπ€
Perhaps we're due for a little check-in π
Read the full fic "Trying"** if you haven't already
Warnings: fertility concerns (very brief mention), daddy kink, oral sex/throat fuck (m receiving), unprotected sex (p in v), use of sex toys/accessories, edging, anal play, forced orgasms and overstimulation, ruined orgasm, squirting, breeding kink, dirty talk
WC: 3.7k
As much as you two wanted a baby together, Harry was a bit happy that it hadn't happened just yet. The mere act of actively trying for it was bringing you two close in a new way that had him falling for you all over again. He'd thought about you as a mother before but now it was noticeable and tangible. He could picture it so clearly.
"What?" you inquired as a nervous giggle bubbled from you and he chuckled and shrugged.
"Nothing. Just...looking." he said simply and you smiled and continued with securing the ties on your sleeping shorts into a little, messy bow. Your top half was still bare, but he wasn't just looking at your breasts. You noticed how his eyes trailed down to your tummy.
You were a little nervous that you hadn't gotten pregnant yet. You'd been trying for like three months! Harry had gone to the doctor the year prior, before you even talked about trying and he was fine. But you hadn't checked on that yet. You wondered if you should. Maybe you had fertility issues that you didn't know of.
"You're fine, baby." Harry reassured you as he hugged around your midsection. You swore he could read your mind. He then smooched a kiss to your temple. "There's like a very specific window for this and if we miss it, it's not happening." he reminded you and you nodded.
"Right..." you responded as you interlocked your fingers with his.
"It'll happen. Besides, if it happens now we're having Taurus baby. Famously incompatible with Aquarians." he reasoned and you chortled.
"That shouldn't be a problem unless you're planning to be romantically linked to our child." you said and he scoffed.
"Jesus..." he scowled, "S'not just in that context." he said as he squeezed your fingers with his and you giggled.
"I know. Just being an asshole." you confessed.
"You know, the other day, when you were chopping up a papya for me?" he inquired and you nodded. "It just hit me how much love is inside of you. And how that would make you such a great mother. Like I know you hate chopping fruits, particularly that one." he said and you hummed in agreement.
"Smells like puke." you mumbled, "You're nasty for eating it as much as you do." you grimaced and he laughed.
"Alright, we can agree to disagree." he said, "But you know, you still did. I didn't even have to ask you to. You just knew." he said and you smiled, "You have an instinct to nurture and dote on and it's so fucking beautiful." he said before kissing your cheek. "When it happens, you're gonna be so good at it." he reassured you.
You pried his hands off of you and twirled around. You got on your tiptoes and kissed him deeply. He was slightly taken aback but quickly wrapped his arms around you and gave you a nice bear hug as your mouths moved together in perfect harmony. Your hands slithered up his nice, firm biceps. Then, those broad shoulders of his. Then up his neck and finally you were holding his face. He started to accelerate the speed of the kiss and your lips twitched up in a grin.
"Easy, daddy." you whispered and he smiled.
"Sorry, baby." he murmured with the most pussy-clenching rasp. "You get me really excited."
With your bare chest pressed against his, he could feel your nipples hardening as you got aroused from your steamy kiss. Your tongue darted out over his bottom lip before he opened up and let you slip it into his. He moaned as your slow and searing kiss grew more and more lewd by the second. Harry's arms released you and instead his hands gripped your hips before letting them slide back towards your ass.
"Yeah, daddy....you're getting so big and hard for me." you praised quietly. Your right hand slid down his brawny chest and chiseled abs and finally reached over that growing bulge in his boxer briefs. You palmed over his bulge a few times before reaching between his legs to fondle his balls too. You could feel it twitch as it came alive. He moaned as you slid your hand inside and guided his half-hard cock upward. "I like it when your tip comes out the top of your briefs. You're so fucking big." you mumbled happily and he smiled before kissing you deeply again.
Just moments later Harry's cock was at full mast. He was dying from your index finger just barely grazing over his tip every now and again. It was starting to make his pre-come bead at his tip.
"Fuck, get on your knees f'me." he ordered and you grinned before pulling away. Harry slipped out of his boxer-briefs before sitting on the edge of the bed with spread legs, his thick erection standing straight up. You loved it when he was so hard that it twitched and stood higher. Your mouth watered at the sight of him so you just went after him without another moment to lose. "Oh shit, baby...." he groaned as he watched your cheeks hollowing out as you sucked his tip, drawing the pre-come up and out of him so that you could get a taste of him. "Shit..." he moaned lowly as he brought his right hand up to your head and wove his fingers into your hair.
"Take more." he said as he gently pushed you down and you relaxed your jaw to get him in deeper. When he was in the back of your mouth you started to stroke what didn't fit as you bobbed your head up and down his cock. His cock was so slippery with your drool and his own arousal. You gagged when he pushed you down a little more, "Shhh...just a little more." he appeased you, it almost felt patronizing. "Relax, baby." he reminded you and you breathed in through your nose and relaxed your throat so that he could get deeper. And boy did he...you were stuffed.
"Fuck yeah. Good girl." he praised you as he started to gently thrust up into your mouth and down your throat. He took a slow pace so that you could properly breathe between each one. You could feel yourself getting all sticky between your legs as your slick started to pool into the crotch of your shorts.
You loved it when he fucked your mouth. You loved the flavor of him on your tongue and the scent of his skin. The weight of his big, fat cock in your mouth...it did ungodly things to you. The vibrations from your muffled moans tickled down his cock causing him to sink in a little deeper. Your eyes were brimming with the tears collected in them from him triggered your gag reflex with each thrust. After a few more they inevitably spilled down your cheeks as you choked around him and tapped his thigh and he pulled you up by the hair.
"You're alright, baby. Breathe." he cooed as you started coughing a bit. He smiled down at you as you took a nice deep inhale. "Alright?"
"Yeah." you assured him with a pleased smile. "Need you." you said softly as you glanced up at him with those pretty, glassy eyes.
"Alright, baby." he smiled and helped you up and out of your shorts before you climbed onto the bed, "How do you want it?"
"From behind." you said and he smiled.
"Mmmm...s'gonna get so deep." he said with a delighted smirk and you nodded.
"Yeah. That's what I want. I wanna feel it tomorrow and the next day too." you said as his lips hovered over yours. Your foot ran up his calf quickly before you tangled your leg with his.
"Yeah, baby? Do you need daddy to pound the horny out of you?" he asked and you nodded.
"Please, daddy." you implored, your desperate gaze met his. He smirked and quickly flipped you over onto your tummy.
His big, warm hands ran up your thighs and gripped your butt before he landed a sharp smack against you. You gasped at the unexpected sting and then you felt his lips smooch down where he spanked you. And then he did it to the other side and your fingers dug into the bed covers to get through the stinging sensation. Your grip loosened when it started to subside.
"You're dripping for me." he hummed and you bit your lip as his fingers tickled over your labia for a moment. "M'gonna get the wedge pillow. " he said and you smiled.
"Yes, please." you hummed and felt him get off the bed. After a few moments you heard him return.
"Hips up for me, baby." he instructed softly and you wiggled around until you were able to arch up high enough for him to slide the wedge right beneath your hips. He already reached part of your g-spot in general, but when he was fucking you from the back and you were angled this way with the cushion, he reached it perfectly. He didn't even warn you before he pushed into you forcefully making you choke on a moan as he squeezed your hips.
"So fucking tight..." he mumbled as he held still to let you adjust for a moment. You felt so fucking full. You swore that he was in your tummy.
"Move! Please, move." you begged and groaned as he slightly drew his hips back and then thrust back in before grinding into you. "Fuck daddy, right there!" you gasped as his tip collided right against your spot. With each grind of his hips you felt a tingle zap through your entire body. Harry then pulled out and sunk in again to deliver a toe-curling thrust. The sounds that left you were obscene. Suddenly you heard a soft buzz and moaned. "Baby..."
"Grabbed your Pebble too." he said and you shook your head.
"You're gonna fuck me up." you mumbled and he smirked.
"Good. Lift a little and get it on your clit." he instructed. You did as he requested, the ergonomic shape of the pillow and toy you were using allowed for the toy to fit perfectly over your clit. The thing about this toy was that it was a sucking toy, the incessant slurping against your clit always pulled orgasms from you with an unbelievable ease. It drove you crazy every single time, you'd always end up squirting and were left a trembling mess. "I know s'hard with this toy but I want you to put off your orgasm as much as possible, okay? I can feel it if you come without permission." he reminded and you bit your lip but nodded.
"Yes, daddy." you responded as you got the toy into the best position and you tensed up as your clit got sucked into the opening.
Harry smirked as he saw your body tense from behind and your hot little muscle squeezed around his cock with the added stimulation. He retreated almost to the tip before mercilessly plunging back into you over and over again as you whined and whimpered for him to keep fucking you. He loved how your fists would clench the bed sheets hard as your walls started to throb in perfect time with his heart beat. It helped him keep his pace until you started to just squeeze, your legs started to stiffen up a bit and he smirked.
"What did I say?" he asked as he stilled inside of you and your body relaxed for a moment before your hips jolted a bit when more of your weight rested on the toy again, causing your clit to feel the sucking even more intensely.
"Sorry, y'just feel so good." you mumbled and he smiled.
"You feel good too, baby. So warm and wet f'me. You've got the most welcoming little pussy." he hummed as he kneaded your ass and then sightly pulled your cheeks apart to get a better look at your other little hole. He had tried to open you up there before but your nerves always got the best of you and you could never get past the second plug. He let a little wad of spit trickle down over it and he lived for the way you whined when he rubbed his thumb against it.
"Gonna let me get in there?" he asked and you chuckled, "Obviously not today, another time. For now s'just gonna be my thumb." he warned as he pressed against the tight muscle just a bit, "Relax, love. Just relax." he encouraged you and continue grinding his cock into you while he pushed his thumb into your bum until he had it in all the way and you whimpered at the full feeling. You were absolutely stuffed. Your toes were curled and your fists clenched as he played with both of your holes. "As much as you say you don't like it...your body says otherwise. You're absolutely drenching my cock." he chuckled, "You're such a little slut for me." he hummed as he thrust in hard and you whimpered, "Let me use you how I see fit." he spoke so deeply that it made you even wetter, "Want me to put a baby in you..." he mused and you moaned as he started to grind against you, getting that spot with every gyration of his hips. That, added with his thumb inside of you and then the fucking sucking toy on your clit, it was getting to be way too much.
"I-I'm gonna come!" you warned him and he chuckled and pulled out of you quickly leaving you completely empty. He saw your body relax and he just squeezed your hip reassuringly.
"That's good, just relax a bit. Let it pass." he encouraged you and you were truly trying your best but your stomach was still tensed tight despite your limbs having relaxed a bit as the peak of your pleasure started to fizzle out.
"Please...it's too much." you pleaded.
"You can take it." he assured you. You knew very well that you could take it but you liked to get whiny because he always babied you just a bit but still had his way with you. You just loved the extra attention he gave you to get you to comply with whatever things he wanted to do with you. He lined himself back up to your drippy opening and eased back in and you sighed in relief. He felt your warm, velvety walls start to flutter when he bottomed out against your g-spot again before he started to hump against you. His tip was prodding and rubbing into that deliciously sensitive spot inside of you as he rolled his hips into you from behind. You were trying not to drool from how good it felt. Your skin was covered in goosebumps as you tried your hardest to stave your orgasm off. "Good girl, you can do it, my love." he assured you with a light chuckle as he felt you trying to not let his movements push you over the edge.
"I can't...I can't..." you cried pathetically. The stimulation to your clit was just about to have you coming undone at any moment. You were trying your hardest not to think about it, "Please, daddy! Please let me come!" you implored. Even if he didn't give you permission you were going to come regardless. He chuckled as your walls fluttered around his girth erratically. "I need to come, please!"
"Go one then." he hummed patronizingly and just like that, the feelings peaked and you started to shiver. All of the wonderful tingling sensations and butterflies started swarming out from your tummy and through your limbs. But suddenly, Harry pulled out of you and while your orgasm continued due to the toy, the best parts of it that came from his cock fucking into you started to fizzle.
"Harry..." you whined as your hips twitched a bit. You felt him kiss the small of your back before he smiled against you.
"A little punishment for being impatient." he said and you felt so annoyed at him.
"You're being mean." you huffed.
"Am I, baby?" he asked and you nodded. "M'sorry. I'm gonna make you come really hard, I promise. Wanted to make you squirt, but you're just a little needier than usual today." he said.
"I'm ovulating." you mumbled and he paused for a few seconds.
"Oh..." he finally exclaimed and you hummed, "I didn't know that." he said.
"Took a test before you got home." you informed him. "S'why I was feeling a little nervous. Because if we...do it tonight and I don't get pregnant then...something might be wrong. With me." you explained quietly. A solemn feeling settled between the two of you and Harry swallowed thickly as he grabbed your hip gently and pulled the pillow from beneath you.
"Baby." He said softly and you reached beneath your body to pull the toy away from you and he grabbed it and turned it off. "Hey, hey, hey...look at me, my love." he hummed and you sighed as you rolled over and he hovered above you and kissed your cheeks. "I love you." he said with a smile, "No matter what, we're gonna be fine." he assured you.
"Promise?"
"Promise." he smiled and you smiled slightly. "Now, can I make you come?"
"For real this time?"
"Yeah, baby. For real." he chuckled.
You opened your legs for him and he slid back inside of you. You hummed in delight as he bottomed out inside of you. Your nails dug into his back and scratched down hard in response to the force of his thrust. He was effectively rearranging your guts, completely stealing your breath away.
"Get your clit for me, love." he said and instead of reaching between your bodies, you grabbed the toy and he smiled as you got it back on and slid it back between your bodies. You gasped as your clit got sucked into the opening and then Harry started to speed up his thrusts. His eyes met yours and he smiled. "This is the one, baby. Gonna knock you up." he hummed, "Fuck, you're gonna be so gorgeous with our baby making your tummy grow." he said and your eyes squeezed shut, "Nuh-uh, look at me. Look at me while I breed your needy little pussy, baby. You want it so bad, don't you?"
"Yes, daddy! Please, give me a baby!" you whispered as your tummy started to feel warm with the pleasure swirling deep inside of you. It was starting to spread throughout your entire body.
"I will, my love. I'm gonna come so deep in your pussy, there'll be no choice but for it to catch." he said and you looked at him with an impatient expression in your eyes. "Oh fuck, your little cunt is so good!" he panted.
You felt like you were on fire, your body was growing tense, the feelings of your desire, lust, love, and pleasure were blossoming to unmanageable amounts. They were going to burst from you. You could feel it literally swelling inside of you, a pressure that was familiar and made for the best orgasms.
"I'm gonna come!" you gasped and he groaned.
"Yeah baby, come for me. Make a mess all over my big, fat cock." he grunted as he pounded into you until the most lewd moan broke from your throat and then moments later he felt the first gush of you squirting against him. His lips turned up in a smile and your eyes fluttered closed as you also smiled wide in relief.
"Fuck! Thank you, daddy!" you panted, "Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! But please, come inside me. Please fill me up!" you mewled.
He lowered himself further as his thrusts grew harder, he was fucking more cum out of you. You couldn't help the shrieks that escaped you as his hips pummeled into yours until you were squirting again from the endless stimulation. Your legs were shaking and your nails digging into his ass as you held him as close as possible.
"Fuck...here it comes, baby. Gonna give you so much cum." he groaned as he started to grind into you before he froze and started to cum. His hot, creamy load erupted from his twitching tip that was buried deep inside of you. He moaned so fucking pretty, it made you dizzy.
"Fuck daddy, I can feel it filling me up...." you smiled happily as he completely stopped and smiled down at you before dipping down and kissing you deeply.
Your lips met his eagerly and tenderly as your bodies started to come down from those incredible highs. He wasn't growing soft all that fast, so he carefully turned you onto your sides so that he could stay inside of you as you kissed each other languidly. Honestly, it had been a while since you had actually made out with your husband and it was nice. He was holding your thigh to keep your leg draped over his hip and he was rubbing up and down it. Your hand was perched over his firm pectoral. You loved his brawny chest so much. Slowly, your kiss started to simmer down and soon he was pecking all over your face as you giggled quietly.
"I love you so much, baby." he hummed quietly.
"Love you too." you whispered happily. "I'm sure this one was it."
"Think so?" he asked quietly and you nodded.
"I do." you confirmed happily, "We'll see in a few weeks." you shrugged and he smiled and kissed your lips quickly.
"Oh you'll be seeing something in a few weeks... a positive test." he assured you.
He was so optimistic, you could see it in his eyes and in turn that made you feel optimistic about your chances to get pregnant this time. You both wanted it so badly that there was no way it wouldn't happen. You giggled and kissed him again.
"Then we'll need to do as much as we can to ensure that happens. You're in for a long night, Mr. Styles." you smirked.
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