#has my 2020 style rip

[ruiniel]

Prickly thorns, tender roses

Fandom: Castlevania series (2017-2021)

Rating: Mature🔞

Relationship: Alucard/Original Female Character

Characters: Alucard, Original Character(s)

Story tags & warnings: Inspired by Castlevania, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Blood and Injury, POV Original Character, 'Happy Ending I Promise', Adventure, Post-Castlevania Season III, Eventual Smut, POV Alucard, Strangers to Friends to Lovers, Bloodlust, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Canon-Typical Violence, Non-Canon Relationship, Imprisonment, Disillusionment, Paranoia, Not Canon Compliant, Hurt/Comfort, Gore, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Blood Drinking, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Unresolved Emotional Tension, Emotional Sex, Drunken Confessions, Guilt, Mental Anguish, Heavy Angst, Monsters, Dark Romanticism, Personal interpretation of post-season III Alucard

Summary:

Set after the events of Castlevania (Netflix) Season III. After the betrayal of his young apprentices, Alucard feels barely alive in his lonesome castle. Days wear on, chipping away at his mind and sanity. And what is the son of Dracula to do with this unwanted visitor, suddenly come at his doorstep? Often the prickly thorn produces tender roses - Ovid

AN: You're being cursed with my first ever Alucard longfic from 2020. Not even rewritten.

I. Refuge

He looked outside the wide arching window, where heavy rain fell upon the world on a cold afternoon. This was the fourth day in a row when the even thrumming persisted against the silent walls of the castle. But then, at least my tomb is dry inside, he thought wryly. The door to the chamber opened with a dust trodden creaking to allow its master passage.

He paced through one of many endless hallways of the ancient structure with his elegant gait, one hand reaching behind his neck. Long fingers halfheartedly glided through fair, unbound hair. He descended the wide set of stairs, lost in thoughts of all and nothing, his bright golden eyes dimmed as he recalled meandering streams of forgotten times.

As ever, his gaze strayed to the wide painting adorning the wall to his right, depicting two figures. Blue eyes filled with purpose and kindness stared back at him; lately it seemed they were alive. He watched the other figure immortalized on canvas. Menacing but contained, it was yet one of the rare, if not sole existing representation of his father void of his renowned merciless and sullen might. He appeared...

Almost human. He lowered his eyes in a frown.

“Adrian! Adrian stop your fleeing this instant!” her voice still rang through the corridors of his mind, accompanied by her light scent of lavender and rosemary.

Caring arms wound around him. “I know you are loath to attend when the sun is so bright outside, but your lessons are not to be trifled with,” the fair-haired woman told the vision of her bright son, whose childlike face puckered in exasperated annoyance.

The images faded to nothing before him, leaving him in the solitary company of his half-human heart and its weak, endless beating.

His mother had always trusted them more than was perhaps wise. Now, after having barely survived an attempt to his own life at their hands, he was beginning to understand the determination of his father, if only an iota. He would never, and could never accept the unfathomable way in which his infamous father Vlad Dracula Ţepeş had chosen to dull his pain. Attempting to wipe humanity off the face of the earth as his last death cry had been a frightening goal even to his generals - and an achievable one at that, which made it all the more necessary to be thwarted.

Necessary. It was necessary.

How interesting that you feel the need to keep telling yourself that, an antagonizing thought hit him with the force of a physical blow. It spanned from a different corner of his mind, one come alive only after the harrowing event of a past not far removed. He drowned in the silence of the vast hall, where sparsely lit torches shadowed broken furniture and the echoes of a great and lavish legacy; memory returned him to the recent past. When he thought he’d found a compress to the aching void left behind by the departure of the Speaker and the Hunter. When he thought he was nurturing the flicker of humanity that drove a part of himself. But he’d mistaken betrayal for sincere interest and companionship, and with it came proof that humanity was burdened with it.

Their corpses may have rotted away by now, he was not sure. He had not gone outside ever since. Not for work, not for gathering or tending gardens or even delving into the rich knowledge of the Belmont vault he guarded, close to the castle of the father he felled. Not for feeding like the vampire kin of his father would. But lately, he found the endless struggle for power within leaning more towards his vampiric side rather than the soft, carefully crafted steadfastness inherited from his human mother.

The downpour continued outside. The sound of his steps his only company, the tall figure changed his direction in the great and empty abode, seeking the library. Loneliness had ever been his mate, but now with the disillusion of recent events, where he had been forced to end two beings he’d cared for, well, it seemed seclusion would be his forever tenant. And he had cared for them, and would have imparted with the humans all his knowledge in time. They came knocking at his door in search of a master, after all. He had done his part, though perhaps failing to account for the impatience defining human race as a whole. And failing to recognize its ruthless desperation owed to the brief flames which were human lives. Yes, he had stalled. And yes, he’d grown accustomed to their presence. Mistakes to learn from. 

Forced by circumstance, he ended their lives. The wound was still there, yet raw and seeping. And even as he speared their bodies through and hung them before his gates, he considered retrieving them afterwards for proper burial.

But then he had not.

Let them stand guard to my secrets, as was their wont. Let the others see. Fear was what they knew best, and what drove them. And it will drive them away from here. Was not living death endured better in solitude?

He walked instead of using his lightning fast shifts in space, his form weakened from the intentional renouncing of sustenance. Even blood would do, though he denounced the taste of it to the heavens.

Having descended the stairs and into the grand entry hall, just as he was about to take a left towards the library, there was a desperate and insistent rapping at the great doors of the castle. His movements turned stealthy in the blink of an eye, and the following second found him at the other end of the hall. The strikes had ceased and instead, the tall doors slowly opened. He rescinded locking them at all since setting the bodies of the young warriors Taka and Sumi outside. And truth be told... did he even need or want protection? His thought was severed by the immediate assail on his senses; the incensed and fearful scent of warm, human blood.

Who on earth would dare go past the horrors at the gate to enter here?

She ran. She ran as fast as her feet took her, through wood and fen, stumbling over gnarled limbs and underbrush protruding from the forest bed. Branches and tree boughs scraped her cheeks. Leaves caught in her pitch black hair as the woman stumbled in her flight, wary of the trampling hooves drawing nigh, gaining on her. It had been unwise to linger, most unwise indeed. But now here she was, losing ground the closer she heard the desperate whinnying of horses.

“Get back here you damned slut!” one was calling with ire in his bloodshot eyes, a heavily bearded man in robes of black and gold.

The woman was on her last remaining strength, and she faltered, near falling to her knees. And her eyes were deceiving her, as ahead materialized the walls and gates of an abode. No... that was no mirage or a fancy of the mind. The gates did exist! The great doors were indeed physical, and closer with each beat of time. She lunged forward with renewed hope, the primal will to survive taking precedence and fueling her desperate flee with a burst of strength. Soon the trees were sparser, and she reached a clearing of sorts, bolting straight towards the heavy metallic doors.

Were those—

Her heart dropped to her feet as the escapee gaped, wide eyed, at the two bodies impaled before the entrance to the castle. The woman turned to look behind her, where the riders pursuing her so fervently had skidded to a halt at the edge of the clearing. Their eyes were set on the same hanging, rotting corpses, the wide archways and tall towers of the ominously silent building. Their faces then focused on her, and hatred shone bright and dark through their eyes. They hurled insults and threats as far as the wind took them, but seemed to dare go no further.

The young woman wavered, and straightening her back, pulled the tattered cloak about her shoulders. She walked closer on hesitating steps, the faint scent of decay assailing her senses.

She looked back to the riders. They were still observing her, determined, waiting to see what she would do. If she fled back to the forest, she was theirs. The woman narrowed her eyes at them before looking back to the silent entrance.

The only way, Ravenna. Squaring her shoulders and steeling the shivering of her wearied and buckling feet, she rushed straight to the castle doors, striking at them until her fists hurt. When no answer came, she looked back to her pursuers, only to see them slowly approaching from the other side of the clearing.

Desperation taking hold, the woman groaned and with one last shred of an attempt she halfheartedly beat at the doors. “Please!” she cried.

Nothing.

Just as all hope failed her, there was a sharp noise of metal sliding upon metal from the inside, and a ghastly wail; the doors opened.

NEXT

[seawardboundsammy]

after many months of work, I reveal my magnum opus. The Sidestep Battlejacket.

pov: ortega seeing sidestep whole for the last time

Holy shit! It's finished!!!

This was my final for my costume design class and it took. so long. Weighing in around 800 pounds in faux leather and spikes, this is by far the most polished and focused battle jacket I've ever made. also noting that typically i wear big glasses! i just had to show off sidestep's eyebags (my hair is always teal though! ult fave color). The prop gun is a nerf gun covered in so much paint.

This design is based off my sidestep Arbor's suit combined with the dog themes sidestep has (eg: bite the hand). More thoughts and wips under the cut!

So this jacket has actually existed in some form since 2020. I bought this leather jacket with the intention of covering it in studs and spikes and then i petered out half way through. Then, after sitting in my closet for 4 years, i finally started back up on it.

These images were my gospel through the project. The design on the left was made a while before and then you can see in real time how i developed my ideas. I had the idea of the front side being "sidestep" and then the back side with the teeth being "retribution/vsona". like a mullet of trauma. the gun was made to match the organic flowing designs of the jacket, to fit the arboreal theme.

the painting of the teeth was a painstaking process filled with much masking tape and clean up. the arm stripes were free handed in a mad dash to the finish. I used Angelus Leather Paints (which i bought WAY too much of, a little goes miles also its so good not sponsored its just good paint) and every section got two coats of white and two coats of teal. The only exception was the orange which is much more transparent which took more coats and hand cramping with those letters. (which btw! no stencil! just moving my brush around all silly style).

i really wanted a prop to make the jacket into something that actually feel like a cosplay, so i hunted down the most sci-blaster nerf gun i could find on amazon and threw gallons of paint at it. the experienced among you may note that nothing wants to stick to that smooth of plastic, but with a solid sanding and angelus acrylic hardener i made it work. originally there were more stripes but it looked busy. there were also going to be two charms for charge and anathema but i um. forgor.

unsanded vs sanded (and some acetone to remove paint) vs final

the hood! good god that hood. that was ripped off an old hoodie and then i found a shirt at a thrift store that just happened to match the color perfectly. its. attached. if you know anything about sewing, please look away from this evil seam. the purple is just to keep it from fraying btw, the actual connection to the jacket it with a much thinner thread in big stitches as to not weaken the faux leather too much. also you can see where i was testing the paint lol.

if you read to here, thank you!! im so proud of this thing and i cant wait to wear it everywhere (when the weather allows.) have a sleepy steppy as a treat for sticking around

[pinkpogiclub]

comprehensive list of my favorite cycling moments in no particular order

the Mont Ventoux incident: twelfth stage of the 2016 tour de france. Sir Chris Froome is comfortbaly leading both the stage and the GC, wearing the maillot jaune. Less than 1k to go and the unthinkable happens: too many people are standing on the road and one of the motorbikes at the front suddenly brakes, resulting in one insane shot of Richie Porte face-planting against the camera. The result? Both Bauke Mollema and Chris Froome crash (no injuries for them, luckily) and Chris Froome's bike BREAKS. PANIC. It's very important to note that at this point team cars are stuck behind and are unable to reach him (both because of the narrow street and the absolutely staggerig amount of people there). So what does Chris Froome do? He starts running marathon style, ready to defend his advantage on the other GC guys tooth and nail. In the end he did keep his lead (after a bike swap from hell and twenty minutes under an amount of stress that could have killed a horse) but BOY was it an Experience to watch live.

the tiny couch of Milano-Sanremo 2023: otheriwise known as the one bed trope cycling adaptation and, in my opinion, a mandatory addition to every post-race waiting room. Not a single person on this couch wanted to be there apart from pippo, who was doing a very bad job at hiding his amusement. Look at this, incredible.

Lorenzo Fortunato's win and Alberto Contador's consequent metal breakdown: overall an incredibly wholesome moment from the 2021 Giro D'Italia. Lorenzo Fortunato (then 25 years old, relatively new and upcoming rider) attacks on the Zoncolan, one of the most famous and gruelling climbs of the Giro: everybody’s rooting for the kid, who then goes on to win the stage all by himself, reaching the top through apocalyptic weather. Admirable, right? Well, while all this was unfolding, Alberto Contador (who was at the time Eolo-Kometa's team manager) was live on Insta pacing around and having an absolute Moment on camera, literally hyperventilating and crying, begging everything and everyone for his protegé to win. He then went on to promise to ride from Pinto (his hometown) to Milan as a celebration. Iconic.

Sepp Kuss' Vuelta victory: AKA the birth of a legend and of my personal GC Kuss agenda. Vuelta de España, 2023: domestique extraoirdinaire Sepp Kuss wins his first stage and he's VERY elated about it (as we all are, tbh), smiling and high-fiving people even before crossing the finish line. On the podium he truly becomes man of the people by chugging down half a bottle of champagne without batting an eye: man of the people right there. By this point no one is really thinking anything of it, we’re all just vibing, happy for a rider who is partecipating in his THIRD CONSECUTIVE Grand Tour of the year. But THEN. It slowly starts becoming clearer and clearer that Jumbo-Visma (rip) has not one, not two, but THREE (3) possible final GC contenders, which is alone a very bonkers concept. In the end Sepp manages to keep the lead despite what looks like a messy (?) situation management from Jumbo-Visma and a stage finish on Angliru where the Jumbo-Vismen seem to be riding all for themselves, sprinting away from Sepp. All in all a display of incredible strenght by both the team (winner of ALL three Grand Tours with THREE DIFFERENT riders. INSANE) and Sepp himself.

Last time trial stage of the 2020 Tour de France: I could easily write a PHD thesis about this day alone. NOTHING encapsulates the drama of sports quite like this particular moment. In one already very odd Tour de France, ridden in mid-September due to Covid restrictions, Primož Roglic absolutely DOMINATES the GC from the very beginning: his team is strong and he keeps the yellow jersey up until the end, to the point where nobody really expects anything major to happen. Cue Tadej Pogačar (called by the italian commentators "il ragazzino terribile" aka "the terrible boy"), fellow countryman of Primož: he’s won a couple of stages and he's shown his worth, finding himself in a very honorable second place in the GC with a 57'' gap from the leader. Which could mean nothing. SO. Here comes the final TT, the very last chance for riders to try and make up some time before Paris: Primož is an excellent TT rider and he's got enough time over Tadej, which should grant him a comfortable victory or, at least, not too much lost time, right? WRONG. OH BOY. Tragedy unfolds as soon as Tadej starts his race and makes it clear that he's out for BLOOD: he clearly doesn't care about second place, he wants the yellow!!!!!! And so we're stuck at home, watching silently as this KID slowly makes up time, second by painful second, all while Primož is having the mother of all shit days on the bike, struggling so much that it becomes harder and harder for him to maintain his hard-earned lead. Tadej goes on to win the stage (surpassing Tom Dumoulin and Wout van Aert, who had both ridden an incredible TT) and, more importantly, his fist Tour at just 21 years old. I still get chills thinking about it. Fun fact: in Paris, Tadej wil also wear both the white and the polka-dot jersey. Totally normal behaviour.

Giulio Ciccone and his close call with excommunication: Tirreno-Adriatico 2023. Giulio is giving out an interview to a fellow italian journalist after the stage, when suddenly one team car speeds up behind him and very narrowly misses him, almost clipping his bike in the process. The result is Giulio breathing life into the infamous "porca mado.....nza", which is a revised version of an extremely NASTY type of blasphemy against the virgin mary. Iconic in its own way, threatened to take down catholicism as a whole in one clean swoop. 10/10.

Geraint Thomas' leadout for Mark Cavendish: last stage of the 2023 Giro d'Italia, Geraint Thomas has made peace with the fact that he’s lost his chance at winning La maglia Rosa. The peloton is steadily approaching the finish line and sprinters are getting ready to give it all for the win: suddenly, we see Geraint Thomas putting himself right in front of the leading group, effectively becoming Mark Cavendish's leadout man, guiding him to a beautiful final win in Rome (mind you, this was supposed to be Mark's last year before retirement). They're not teammates, so Geraint Thomas had no reason to do it except for the fact that he's known Mark for the better part of twenty years and he wanted to help him: INSANE narratives, we all cried at the sight of the two old men embracing eachother like little kids. SIGH

2023 Road-Race World Championship. This place has everything: rainy weather, beautiful landscapes, highland cows, Mathieu van der Poel taking a dump in a newly renovated house, childhood rivals standing together on a podium, Pogi in neon green. Also known as the day Mathieu van der Poel went from Good Rider to Insane Supernatural Being: from attacking with 20k to go in what probably was the hardest course ever designed in a Road Race World Championship ever, falling down while all the team cars were unreachable, tearing off a piece of his own fucked up shoe because it was bothering him, to winning while sopping wet and crying. INSANE. Bonus: this absurd newspaper front page that I wish I had framed in my living room.

[namedr]

What are your art inspirations?

Disclaimer: A LOT of RAMBLING

Honestly hard to answer, nowadays I don't really look at a lot of art anymore but mostly just movies.

Biggest inspiration over the years (from 2020 to 2022) would have to be Kan Liu. His painting style with mostly just the round brush and hard edges really spoke to me, especially when it came to lineart I was a massive fucking copycat lmao.

Around 2022 I also began falling in love with Sungmoo Heo. The perspectives and overall style just fucks so hard.

The most obvious inspo would have to be Seonhyeok Jeon though, who I still rip off blatantly.

In general I began taking art seriously around 2020, when I found Kan Liu, because I began training to compete in bodybuilding, which I did the next year. I began getting super interested in how the body and muscles work so I just drew those a fuck ton, and those anatomy studies ended up really helping my art skills in general.

Anyway! For animation... Hiroto Nagata and Q Kawa are big inspos.

This shit is so fucking RAW and HOLY SHIT when I look at how the perspective gets just in your face I always just think "what am I even doing man I have to PRACTICE". It's like watching a Zyzz or Ronny Coleman clip before doing a lift at the gym but for art, shit's motivational.

This cut in Ghost In the Shell as well is WOW, I think what speaks a lot to me is when an animation doesn't conform to what's standard in the medium and tries to push boundaries/be unique. Be it in this case through insane details, in the case of Mushoku Tensei through bg animation mixed with extreme foreshortening or just a crazy perspective and punchy movements in the Madoka clip.

Overall it's hard to say what else my inspirations are though. When it comes to manga and comics I can think of Batman Year One, The Climber by Shin-ichi Sakamoto, Ultra Heaven by Keichi Koike, Solo Leveling (big inspo in 2021) and Homunculus.

Also, even though everyone assumes it, I haven't played Cyberpunk 2077 or am that big a fan of the Blame! manga, I guess I just have a fairly similar artistic vision to both of those.

For animated fiction it'd be Spiderverse recently, Millennium Actress, Silent Voice and a million other anime I've forgotten the name of. Naoko Yamada's directing for Silent Voice or other anime like Hibike Euphonium and the Liz movie has always been amazing to me because she is able to express characters personalities through their body language, like they way they walk or stand, in a way I have never seen done before. Extremely recognizable and iconic style imo. A long time ago I used to be really into watching anime, but I don't care much for it anymore.

Other inspo would be this guy on twitter, his stuff is insanely cool https://twitter.com/be_myvu/status/1725069515107533178?s=46

It's like that Ralph Waldo Emerson quote - “I cannot remember the books I've read any more than the meals I have eaten; even so, they have made me.” I think throughout the years I've been so obsessed with all kinds of artists that I've taken in inspiration from everywhere. I cannot recall them all anymore, but they have made me the artist I am today.

Currently, like I said, I would consider movies to be my biggest inspiration because I find it interesting how cinematographers are able to stylize real life, which I'm trying to get closer to. If I could direct a movie, I would probably stop making art right then and there, but I'm not really working towards that goal anyway lmao. One day, being able to make a short film in animation would be something I would like to do though.

I'm not deep enough into the movie scene to get the street cred of being called an expert but I love them a lot. Fallen Angels made me fall in love with fisheye back then for example. Fight Club and The Batman have a grit to them visually that I find inspiring, and movies like Persona and Heat also come to mind when I think of movies I just love. I could look up my letterboxd for a more thorough answer but I feel I've already been writing way too long.

For video games, I guess you can imagine that I would say Signalis lmao. Besides that I can think of Subahibi (vn), Muramasa (vn), and Va-11 Hall-a for inspirations

Lastly, I guess huge inspirations are also a fuck ton of music. I mostly listen to either metal or hard techno, but I think I'll refrain from any more yapping.

I feel that this isn't really a great answer to the question, but it's the one I consider the most correct, because it's never as simple as just mentioning one artist. With a lot of these you wouldn't see a visual resemblence to my art, but in all of these I recognize a feeling that I also find in my own art.

Thank you for the question!

[foxglovefaun]

Hey yo!! I was just lookin over ur sketchbooks stuff, which is,,,,so grand and soulful I can’t put much words to it and wanted to ask do u use a specific type of pencil? Or any special thing like that?

thank you so much!! <3 ;0; my sketchbook is my safe place rn, so this means a lot. and i do! i have a lot of specific pencils. i have a series of tools that are in my everyday artbox, and i've narrowed down a collection that's been pretty reliable for me. i can introduce you! :) ...ok but r u ready for a infodump because

ok this is my everyday Graphite Mechanical Pencil Squad. I always have them in my box and i use them for just about every pencil drawing in my sketchbook.

(I added a post break because I didn’t think about it before :3 )

from top to bottom: - Steadtler: Mars Technico 2.0 -> used for longer pencil studies and anatomy stuff, as well as experiments with comic-style hatching. has a tiny built-in sharpener! I like using this for drawing the base for portraits coz it's got a real consistent value - Sakura: Sumo Grip 0.7 -> comfy. :) big. :) - Tombow: Mono Graph 0.5 -> my current baseline. I've used this pencil since 2021 when i first started recovering from burnout. I really like its weight balance, as the feed end is quite heavy. This pencil was engineered for writing though, so while it has a "rotating lead mechanism", it doesn't activate while I'm drawing. Apparently it's supposed to rotate the lead as you write so it stays sharp. :0 - Uni: Kuru Toga 0.3 -> very lightweight, sometimes feels fragile but is durable as hell. I use this for really fine lines, like details in the eyes or hatching around the nose in really small portraits. I used to use this size more in college, but I use it less nowadays.

speakin of that damb MonoGraph, i have S e v e r a l

I have six currently, which feels like a bananas number of mechanicals to carry at one time, but five of them carry different color leads that i use super regularly so i ignore this.

you probably are familiar with my multi-color sketches with blue and red and pink n stuff, and these are what i use for that. sometimes i use light blue to sketch, then clean it up with the dark blue, and then add portrait details with red. Other times i sketch with pink and then define everything with purple. anyway

i load them all up with Uni Nano Dia color leads. Historically I've used Pentel red leads and Prismacolor Col-Erase wood pencils, but these are my favorite now. They are all erasable and erase pretty well! (The lavender does not specify that it is erasable, but i assure you, it will submit to an eraser.)

speakin of erasers. This has actually been the most difficult squad to narrow down, as erasers are all super different from one another, even within the same brand. Sometimes they smear my shit, sometimes they rip up the paper, sometimes they lift okay but still leave a ghost. not these. These guys are reliable. They help me move. They text me back. - Muji: plastic eraser, hard type, black -> this was my biggest most recent surprise. Muji has very affordable minimalist materials that can look cheap on the surface level, but tbh I've never had an eraser serve me so well. When it comes to erasable marks, it lifts EVERYTHING off of my Talens sketchbook. I wish it came in a stick format for more control, but the brick will have to do for now. - Tombow: Mono Stick, plastic eraser -> bless. Soft to the touch but doesn't need a shit ton of pressure to lift stuff out and clean up. Performs consistently and creates a super clear surface. My favorite standard-sized stick eraser, hands down. - Tombow: Mono Knock -> badass. I've had this thing in my arsenal since 2008. I found my first pink one in Japantown San Francisco and carried it all the way to QC with me in 2020. It was finally put to rest after it broke in 2022, and was immediately replaced with the green one. It's kind of hard for an eraser, which is good because the skinny ones can tear under pressure, but it's precise, clean, and usually lifts everything out. Excellent for portraiture. It's also great for drawing on its own and I'll draw highlights or carve out shapes in big smudgy fields of grey. I highly recommend this tool. - Tombow: Mono Zero, elastomer eraser -> weird. so smol. does cool shit tho. This is my smallest eraser ever, and it took a while to find one in stock. It is so very fine that it has its own refill method and part of it is reinforced with plastic. It's clean tho, and so goddamb precise. - Kneaded eraser, brand ???? i dont remember, probably Mars : I love my kneaded eraser. I've always used it to press and lift when it comes to sketchbook stuff, but i recently learned that you can just kinda ROLL IT across your surface and it will lighten EVERYTHING, EVENLY. I lost my shit tbh, nobody ever told me I could use it like that and now I get legit excited to use it. Very satisfying. But also very sticky and sometimes Bad Texture, so I keep it in a little tin. along with the whole series i described, I also carry these with me in my box. Just misc tools that also live here. Tiny sharpener, blenders, supplementary erasers and pencils.

I also have a small frame-style box that I keep my basic wood drawing pencils in, as well as the tiny eraser and the 2.0 pencil because they fit. :)

Everyone lives in here, and i like that the box can sorta serve as a work surface too, using the lid like a lil table. It's also easy AF to just toss everything in there, so cleaning up my workspace takes less than a minute now.

i use all of these whenever doin sketchbook stuff. I always keep them in my newest travel box, which has served me very well when going down the avenue to draw outside. :)

i hope this gives u some feedback for choosing your own tools! :D I get my materials from all over the place, but when I was picking up the Mono Graphs en masse I was getting them from Stationery Pal at a pretty significant discount.

thank u for ur interest. :3 I have been wanting to assemble a post like this for a while and it felt good to just sit n think about my tools for a little bit. anyway. :3 take care. thanks <3 Hope this answered your question! (and hope it wasnt too much lmao sdfjkgskdjhfkjshd)

[tubbishtobias]

I know I’m late to this.

But here’s what I have to say.

2020.

COVID hit. I was a young girl, who was recently going through realizations of sexuality, friends etc. my friends introduced me to the dream SMP. I thought it was a little silly, then simping over these people playing Minecraft. But then I got into it. Like, super into it. Realizing there was more than just funny clips, there was actual LORE. I was so invested. I would sculpt clay of them, loving making little references of things that I like.

Going back into school post covid, I was so cringe. I thought my style was cool, and y’know, I did kind of eat. But I was happy. So happy. The friends that introduced me to it no longer liked it. They were too cool for it and kind of ditched me.

I had this community, that took a video game and made it into this super awesome story while still maintaining humor.

And they were real. It wasn’t like getting into a show, I think that’s part of the reason that I liked it so much. These creators were real, they have feelings, and lives.

They inspired me. Inspired me to keep drawing, even though the only thing I could draw was them. I loved it. Art block was no more lol

This is going to sound silly, but the dream SMP definitely helped me figure out my sexuality. Seeing other people so freely open about it made me think.

I didnt like when all of the trolls came and I was bullied relentlessly because I liked watching some people play Minecraft.

They helped me inspire my passion for steaming. Where I couldn’t imagine myself doing anything else but that. It seems so fun, to have a community that likes watching you.

Yea, all of my friends thought I was weird crying when Technoblade killed Tubbo with a firework, but I LOVED the plot. The lore. I didn’t even know what lore meant, or plot armor, or canon. Haha, I would give anything to have them back.

Technoblade especially. I didn’t know much about him before the SMP. But he is a super big part of my life and my joy. His ability to make humor, but maintain a serious atmosphere. His jokes, his PVP, he seemed like such a cool dude. Me cheering when he said that his cancer had been 99.99% percent removed.

2022.

I was going to one of the most exciting things I have ever done. A new experience, I was gonna meet new people. I was obsessed with drawing, the SMP, and HB. I was excited to meet people like me. I knew that I was trans, I wasn’t necessarily out tho.

I woke up one morning to a text from my friend. She used to like the SMP, but not really anymore. We were still friends.

She asked if I heard the news. Technoblade died.

I thought that she was joking.

Until I got another text from my friend. She’s one of my closest friends who was never really into the SMP but she knew that I liked it so she asked me about it.

I opened YouTube. Watched the video, sobbing. There was no way. You watch these people online, never having met them, only seeing what they want you to see on screen. You never know what you have until it’s gone.

My mum watched it.

She said that it was nice to see behind the scenes, seeing his dad, knowing that he’s a person. Writing RIP Technoblade we love you Alex as I went to my new experience the next day. A part of me seemed to just be broken.

Haha I’m sure this seems cringe. But like, everybody has there passions. These people inspired me. They made me who I am today, I wouldn’t be writing this if it wasn’t for them. Cancer has affected so many people in my life. It’s hard, it is. Knowing I will never get to meet Alex sucks. I mean, haha I probably wouldn’t have anyway. But him really being gone.. I don’t know. I know, people say, “he’s not really gone,” but it’s still different. He put on this attitude of wanting to power through it, making jokes. God, I miss him. I never met him, he doesn’t know me. But still, he made an impact on so many people. I know, this story has probably happened to so many people. But it feels good to tell it.

I know I’m not a super popular content creator. I May never be. But it’s nice to do this. It’s what I love to do, maybe I’ll have an impact some day.

Thank you Technoblade.

Im going to draw something for Technoblade 25, hopefully I’ll post it in a couple of days.

[happymetalgirl]

Undeath - More Insane

--------------------------------------------------

Well in the spirit of dusting off this blog and scrubbing off some of the rust with some brief album reviewing, what better way to ease back in than with some simple, good ol' meat & potatoes death metal. This is the third album from old school Floridian death metal revivalists (from New York), Undeath!

Their 2020 debut album, Lesions of a Different Kind, instantly hooked a great many death-metalheads clearly hungry for the primal, groove-focused, hardcore-influenced stew of gory, straightforward death metal that Undeath was cooking, myself included. Though a subtle feature of their craft, I think the band's hardcore influence is what ultimately gave them the edge over the surrounding death metal crop with the dynamic punch of hardcore, and the surge of bands with similar influence like Frozen Soul, Gatecreeper, Sanguisugabogg, and 200 Stab Wounds represented, I think, a shift in the death metal landscape toward leaning into allyship with the meteoric rise of metallic hardcore thanks to bands like Code Orange, Harms Way, Kublai Khan, and especially Knocked Loose. Undeath's sophomore effort in 2022, It's Time...To Rise from the Grave, deviated basically not at all from the mission statement they'd put out two years prior, in style or quality, to the dismay of no one really.

More Insane finally does show a change of trajectory for Undeath as they showcase some technicality and finesse through some slightly more sophisticated composition as a break from the infectiously filthy, nonstop go-dumb approach. Nothing radical, but I think a fresh approach for the band relatively speaking, even if Cannibal Corpse worship or Bloodbath worship aren't exactly new in the death metal landscape broadly.

I actually was kind of disappointed by this album's playing into those over-played death metal compositional tropes on my initial listens to it because the shift of focus onto more intricate guitar passages and more ornate song structures does indeed kind of clash with the simple, no-nonsense, anti-overthinking approach that made Undeath's hooky and delicious pair of albums before More Insane such a breath of fresh air for death metal. And it was disappointing to hear what I first heard as being dragged into the muck of death metal by the mere gravitational pull of it simply to keep on schedule and put out an album. The more I listened, however, without the expectation of the same jungle-pit-opening death metal experience the band already kindly delivered twice, the more I came to appreciate the finer details of the arpeggiated melodic leads on "Sutured for War", the ripping speed of the drumming on "Cramped Caskets", the intricacy of the riffing on "Disattachment of a Prophylactic in the Brain", Alexander Jones' more expansive vocal technical prowess all across the album, and the more I came to appreciate More Insane as a finely crafted death metal album in a slightly different vein that showcases the instrumental talents Undeath has to offer without sacrificing too much of the hooky, meaty core of the band's primary compositional appeal, and definitely one of the year's most solid death metal records from a band who has, through both their consistency and boldness, definitely earned being trusted to try something different and to expand their sound in the future.

The strength of More Insane lies less in the brute force and hardcore-infused muscularity of their prior output and more in the band's practiced and meticulously honed technical abilities in death metal's foundational elements both in writing and playing. And with less of a lean-in to the novelty of the hardcore influence that colored the previous two albums, Undeath prove that they're not on top of the death metal game because of a gimmick or a trend, but because they know their shit, and they've got their shit together, and in that sense, More Insane is an even simpler display of their death metal supremacy than It's Time and Lesions.

8/10

[theseasicksailorblog]

Indie Sleaze: 5 item shopping list

My non-negotiable 5 clothing items to live your indie sleaze truth, written as 2000s/2010s fashion historian.

Ballet Flats

Worn by school-teachers and it girls alike, ballet flats have always been a staple in fashion history, especially in the late 2000s and 2010s. For a first time wearer a simple black flat is a safe bet as it can be paired with anything, but if you want to sleaze it up, opt for a metallic or glitter variation. Something to note about indie sleaze fashion is that the more extra it feels, the better it looks, so don't hold back on cool, funky, flats. These can be found in thrift stores, department stores, and all over Amazon.

Metallic Fabric

Since the dawn of rave/party culture, glamorous lamé fabrics have used for just about every article of clothing possible. Cheaper spandex alternatives rose to popularity as The Cobra Snake era partying merged into mainstream. Shiny red leggings paired with a black cropped tank was peak casual 2010s sleaze attire. A great place to find styles like this is Los Angeles Apparel aka American Apparels re-brand. Though they no longer sell the fun colored disco pants and shorts, the lamé collection offers a variety of shiny colorful items with that trustworthy AA quality. Other places to look are party supply stores, poshmark/depop/ebay, rave shops, and of course Amazon.

Ultra Feminine Dresses

One of the most underrated pioneers of indie sleaze fashion is model and t.v. personality Alexa Chung. While Alexa is often grouped with the Twee (shopping list coming soon) and hipster aesthetics of the 2010s her ability to blend soft girlish dresses with last nights makeup allows for an uber sleazy effect. Mini shifts, polka dotted a-lines, and vintage baby-dolls all work as long as you pair them with unkempt hair and grungy tights to keep the edge, bonus points if your dress has a peter pan collar or your tights have rips. You can find these practically anywhere but start at your local thrift store as they usually have large selections of outdated dresses that were popular during this time period. Alternatively look at department stores, vintage/antique markets, and you guessed it Amazon.

Ringer Tee's and Shorts

Before athleisure was an over-saturated mess of "flare leggings" and Lululemon we took inspiration from student athletes everywhere with the iconic ringer tee's and ringer shorts. Getting their name from the contrasting ring of fabric outlining the seams of the article, ringer style pieces were seen everywhere and worn with everything. Both such versatile basics that could be kept casual or dressed up that you might see a ringer tee with a skirt, or ringer shorts with stockings and a blouse. Los Angeles Apparel has great options for both the shirts and the shorts, places like Walmart and Target often carry ringer shorts, and Forever 21 with great ringer tees, and as always Amazon.

Stockings/Tights

It doesn't matter if they're black, white, multicolored, fish-netted, or opaque, stockings always find a way to elevate a basic look and is often what takes an outfit from mainstream to indie sleaze. Don't worry about buying a super nice quality pair as stockings look best with ripping seams and enormous holes. But don't tear them with a fork like those tiktok girls did in 2020, it screams try hard as a real indie sleaze girl would rip them via dancing, curb sitting, and drunken stumbling. Just like the dresses, you can find tights anywhere. However I don't recommend secondhand as they are technically an undergarment and it's hard to ensure the level of cleanliness.

Spacehey saw it first https://spacehey.com/theseasicksailor

[stingandsnoutbindery]

Advent Anthology by @pacific-rimbaud

A Compilation of PR's one-shot entries for DHr Advent, years 2020-2022.

Fandom: Harry Potter

Relationship: Draco Malfoy x Hermione Granger

Art by the wonderful @chestercompany

My binderary baby and second fanbinding project.

read below the cut for the process and other binding deets.

Quick Specs

20,015 words | 179 pages | Quarto (1/4 of Letter)

Technique: Flatback bradel Title & Body Font: Libre Baskerville (in various style emphasis)

Fics included:

Les Pelerins (10k; 2020 entry)

I'm Never Lonely When I'm With You (5k; 2021 entry)

On The Virtues of Inexhaustible Burning (5k; 2022 entry)

Pac is the type I could trust to write anything and I know I'll absolutely love. Her advent fics, in particular, I especially adore. The writing is very visceral and I will not admit how many times I've reread these.

On The Book

I had not intended to bind any book/s for @renegadepublishing's binderary because of my hectic schedule, however FOMO won over and this book was born. It was a relatively quick design and typeset (I really do better under pressure lol). I wish I could say the same for when I started the actual binding though. This is the 8th book I’ve bound and I had expected it to go relatively smoothly, but this book fought me every step of the way and I'll indulge in expressing my distress on this post.

First, the print place I go to messed up my typeset, thus me having to travel back home to use our old crappy inkjet (that took 3 hours to print). And because said printer is crappy, I had to use 100gsm short grain to minimize show-through, and well, you can imagine how stick straight the pages are. Second, I made the case too small (I worked on the book after a toxic 12 hour lab day and was not in the right state) and instead of redoing the covers, I re-trimmed and repainted the fore edge (at cost of my lovely margins ..wails). Third & last, the vinyl refused! to stick to the cover and I proper burnt the HTV as well as my finger on my iron. In the book's defense, it was my first time using leather paper and I forgot to test their chemistry.

On The Bind

Everything else went swimmingly, aforementioned shit aside. I tried not to make this book scream Christmas and leaned into a more subtle theme through color choices. I finally got to use this lovely red leather paper from Itoya, which my parents bought me during their trip in Japan. Many thanks to @celestial-sphere-press for helping me out with the shops to visit!

The design cover was made on Illustrator. The words are actually the fic prompts which I arranged in concentric circles, inspired by the arrangement of the advent candles in our local church from years back. I have no idea what paper my print place used, but it has some nice pulp to it.

As I said, I melted the HTV and certain parts refused to stick, so I peeled all of it off, except for the spine title (which miraculously stuck) and used my foil quill pen instead. I used an off-brand one and it's really good!

I also did this sort of strip across the edge which I learned is called a "river" as Nic @bindsbymunchkin called it. The side near the spine though, looked asymmetrically empty, so I added the foiling. And as this is an anthology, the punctuations was a design choice to convey the start and end and pauses in-between stories (and mostly because they just look fancy lol).

Like my last bind, the edges are gold which is comprised of an undercoat of diluted dark gray Sakura acrylic paint and many layers of Liquitex iridescent gold acrylic ink.

Endbands are made with alternating colors of cream, gray, and gold DMC cotton threads, however I'm learning I don't very much like how sewn endbands look on small flatbacks.

The endpapers are my fave. I had already tipped in plain cream cardstock but then I was like: this book needs MARBLED PAPER! so I ripped off the one I had stuck and replaced it. It's actually not real marbled paper HAHA. I sourced it from this site, printed it on some heavy paper, and oh my god I believe the universe really meant for me to find this pattern because it coincidentally matched the colors of the endbands!!

On The Typeset

I wanted to keep things cohesive but also give each story its own character. Libre Baskerville was a lovely typeface to do that on.

From left to right: Les Pelerins, I'm Never Lonely When I'm With You, On The Virtues of Inexhaustible Burning

For Les Pelerins, I wanted to mimic the silhouette of the establishments in Montmartre, hence the varying heights of the letters. If I wasn’t on a time crunch, I would’ve spent more time editing the headers but alas this is what we get. INLWIWY is more straightforward– a pinecone, which was a recurring theme in the story. And I think OTVOIB is my favorite. I drew tiny gold cracks onto the coal rock which is a significant element in the story. It still gives me that stomach flip whenever I reread it (iykyk).

[jakeysfallingsky]

Among the Wildflowers - Chapter 1 - Jake Kiszka X Reader

Hi there, this was sitting in my phone notes for weeks and I finally turned it into a living document and realized it was 30k+ words in total - so please enjoy the first chapter of this story that was inspired by Jake's (not so new, now) haircut! There is much more to come for this story and much left to be written, but would love any feedback :)

Minors, please do not interact - 18+ content in upcoming chapters.

Summary: You're a hairstylist in Nashville, and the boys in Greta Van Fleet become your clients when they relocate to the city. They quickly all take a liking to you, one sweet guitarist especially. Jake is patient in his pursuit of you, but will your self-created set of rules hold you back from ever being anything more with him?

Word Count: 5600+

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol.

January 2020

It was a sunny winter day in Nashville, the cooler temperatures causing you to shiver as you walked from your car to the door of the salon you worked at. You had lived in Nashville since you were a teenager, relocating to the city with your family from the Midwest. Quickly falling in love with the vibrancy of the city, you knew this would continue to be your home for years to come.

You worked at a trendy salon, a lot of your coworkers also being younger. Most of your clientele were people around your age, and you enjoyed getting to know your diverse client base. Many artists of different varieties, people who worked for all of the surrounding record labels and studios, and of course - plenty of musicians.

Despite this, you tried to keep your personal life and work life separate. You didn’t accept the many invitations you received to come to art shows, local concerts, and simple hangouts. As much as you loved your loyal clients, you also wanted to remain a tried and true professional while you continued to establish your brand in the hair and styling industry. More than a few of your friends had their hearts broken by Nashville folks in the music or touring industries as well, and you had sworn off of dating anyone with a career that would take them away from the city frequently.

Sighing as you checked your schedule for the day, you saw that you had four new clients all back to back. You loved meeting new people and considered yourself a social butterfly, but you always tried to schedule a little extra time for first time appointments as you got to know your new client and their goals for their hair. Upon further inspection, you saw that three of the four individuals had the same last name and realized they had to be related.

“Hmm, some sort of family outing maybe.” You mumble to yourself as you get your area set up for the day. The first few appointments fly by quickly, and before you know it, there are four young men waiting at the front of the salon.

“Hi there!” You say cheerfully as you approach them. You introduce yourself and they go around and share each of their names as well. Sammy, Danny, Josh, and…Jake.

Jake is full on staring at you as you and his brothers speak. He’s left speechless as he takes you in - white Vans high tops, ripped black jeans cuffed at the ankles, black tank top that’s cropped just enough to show a sliver of your stomach and reveal your curves, and an oversized corduroy black button up over the tank. Your golden skin is accentuated by a dusting of freckles and your cheeks are tinted pink with a rosy hue. Your hair is gorgeous, long loose waves flowing down your back with curtain bangs swept along the sides of your striking eyes. There are words coming out of your full lips, but Jake isn’t listening. He’s realizing that you’re the most beautiful girl he has ever laid eyes on, and his nerves start to run wild.

“Jake…Jacob! You there?” Josh asks with a pointed elbow to Jake’s side.

“Oh-oh god, sorry, what was the question?” Jake stammers, cheeks turning red with embarrassment as he comes back down to earth.

You giggle at Jake, knowing that he was checking you out and thinking he is just too cute. “I asked if you are triplets. I get that Danny is a chosen brother, but the three of you just look so similar.”

“Josh and I are identical twins, Samuel is three years younger.” Jake explains and Josh immediately follows with “But I’m the oldest! By 5 minutes!”

“Okay, if you’re the oldest, then you can go first. Let’s go, boys.” You tell them and they follow behind you. 

Josh plops in your chair first, and after you discuss his trim and wash his hair, you start cutting and ask the group more questions to get to know them better. You learn that they’ve all just moved here from Michigan and they’re in a band together. Each of them is incredibly friendly, and you tell them about yourself as they share stories of their own. They almost feel like old friends, despite you just meeting them. They’re all quite chatty, except for Jake, who sits quietly and watches you interact with your brothers, chiming in with a brief answer to a question every now and then. Once Josh is all set, you trim Sam and Danny’s hair too, and then Jake is finally up.

“Your turn!” You say in an upbeat tone and Jake quietly takes a seat in your chair. His chestnut-colored waves flow past his shoulders down his back. “What are you thinking of doing with your hair today, Jake?” You ask as you start to inspect his hair, running your fingers through the ends.

“I uh, I don’t really like getting my hair cut,” he mumbles, “can you just take off the ends and even it out, please?”

“Yeah of course I can, I promise I don’t bite by the way.” You say cheekily and a small smile crosses his face and you take that as a win. He seems shy, but you can’t tell if that’s because he’s nervous about getting a haircut or he’s normally like this around new people. Jake’s uncharacteristic timidness is not lost on his brothers, who all picked up on that Jake is definitely nervous not only because he’s getting his hair trimmed, but because he thinks you are cute as well.

You push all of Jake’s long hair to the front of his shoulders and place a finger against where you think you should cut, about a quarter of an inch from the ends. “How does this sound?” You ask him.

“Sounds good.” He answers quietly and you nod and put a cape on him. The goosebumps rising on his neck where your fingers barely brush him is not lost on you, and you smirk to yourself as you take him over to wash his hair. His eyes flutter shut as you begin to work shampoo through his hair, and you look down at his beautiful features. He has a kind face with a strong jaw and cheekbones and full pink lips, with long lashes hiding the honey-brown eyes that you were careful to not get lost in earlier. He’s utterly stunning.

You finish washing his hair then take him back to your chair. You try to get him to chat a little bit more as you trim his hair, and you learn that he’s been playing the guitar nearly since he could walk, he loves to travel and cook, and he’s secretly a big fan of Imagine Dragons. The other three boys share a few looks, seeing the two of you really hit it off once Jake opens up a bit.

You finish his hair and ask him what he thinks. “Looks great!” He says with the corners of his lips curling up, and he means it. 

You turn to the group and sigh. “Well boys, it was a pleasure spending some time with you today. I do hope you’ll come back to see me next time.”

Josh immediately spoke up. “Oh yeah, we all look great. You’re our person for sure. Don’t worry, you won’t be getting rid of us anytime soon.”

You laugh. “Good! I had fun meeting you all today.”

Sammy then piped in. “Do you want to go get a drink with us later? We don’t have a lot of friends here yet since we just moved a few weeks ago. And you’re really cool.” Jake’s heart started beating faster at the thought of spending more time with you. 

You blush at Sammy’s  invitation and compliment. “Oh, thank you so much for the invite. I already have plans though. I can recommend some good spots for you to check out.”

Jake’s heart sank a little, but he wasn’t ready to say goodbye to you yet. “Yeah, can you give us a few spots?” He asked. You quickly wrote down a few of your favorite go-to spots and even your drinks of choice at each establishment and handed the paper to Jake. 

“You guys have fun, and keep in touch!” You waved goodbye and each boy waved back, Jake shooting you a shy grin as he turned to leave.

You walked back to your chair and flopped into it, trying to slow the quick beat of your heart. Jake was certainly going to be trouble for you, if you weren’t careful. 

The boys ended up going to one of the places you had recommended, and everyone got a beer, except for Jake. He ordered the drink you had written on the little piece of paper and smiled when he saw the bartender reach for bourbon. A girl after my own heart, he thinks to himself.

“Jake, my brother,” Sam starts once they’re at a table, “you fucked up by not getting her number.”

Josh and Danny nodded in agreement. “You were looking like a lovestruck fool back there, but so was she.” Josh said.

Jake shook his head. “Don’t say shit like that to me guys. She was so beautiful but way out of my league.” He took the first sip of his drink - your drink - and noted that it was delicious, because of course it was.

“Come on man, we wouldn’t lie to you. But, there’s always next time.” Danny said.

There were a lot of next times, as fate would have it. Each boy routinely came in alone, or together, to see you. They quickly became your favorite clients. You really hit it off with each of them in a friendly way, and it pained you a little to turn down their frequent invitations to get a drink, dinner, come to a BBQ, go to a show, or even just hangout. But, the Kiszka’s and Danny were relentless, partly because each boy thought you were just the coolest and so fun, and partly because each of them wanted to set you up with Jake desperately.

The boy was down bad for you. The confident and collected rockstar found himself a nervous mess every time he saw you. He couldn’t help but feel disappointed every time you rejected his or his brother’s invitations to do something together. Jake could feel that there was chemistry between you two, but something was holding you back.

Eventually, because the boys were big fans of yours, you were hired by Greta Van Fleet’s team to style the boys for photoshoots and promo that they needed to shoot, so you ended up seeing them more frequently than every couple months. There were even a few select occasions where you were flown out to their sets across the country, when they were shooting something on tour away from home. Your feelings for Jake and platonic, friendly love for the rest of the boys grew and grew, and your resolve to continue your professional-only relationship with them was wearing thin after several years of them being only your clients.

•

•

Present Day, 2023

It was a sunny spring evening and the band came over to Jake’s to hang out. After a bit of practicing and playing some video games, everyone was hanging out on his back porch.

“What are you guys up to for the rest of the week?” Danny asked.

“Jacob and I are getting our hair cut tomorrow, I forced him to make an appointment with me,” Josh replied as he grabbed another drink, “he needs one.”

“I do not.” Jake grumbled from his seat.

Sam looked closely at his brother’s hair. “You definitely do, probably a few inches, Jake,” Sam started, “you have split ends out the wazoo. Go for below the collarbone or something.” 

Josh hummed in agreement. “See! Told you. That would look good.” Jake just shook his head in response.

Danny chimed in as well. “Don’t be nervous Jake, aren’t you excited to see your favorite girl tomorrow?”

Jake sighed and nodded with a wistful smile. The rest of the boys of course knew how Jake felt about you, but no one knew just how deep Jake’s feelings and adoration ran for you. 

“Yeah, it’ll be nice to see her.” Jake said as he stared into his drink. 

“You should see if she wants to hang out with us Jake, it’s been awhile since anyone has tried to invite her somewhere.” Sam added. 

Jake nervously chuckled and the conversation shifted. Eventually, everyone headed out for the night and Josh clapped his twin on the shoulder. “I’ll see you tomorrow, I’ll pick you up.” Jake muttered a quiet thanks and said goodnight to his brother. He trudged upstairs to start getting ready for bed.

Jake sighed as he looked in the bathroom mirror. His brothers were right, he really did need a good amount of hair cut off. The thought of that scared him, but he knew if he asked you for something different with his hair, you’d make it look good no matter what. 

He brushed through his long tangles and took a frizzy lock of hair in his hand. He folded it back at different lengths to see how it looked in the mirror. It was then that he decided for sure that he would ask you for something shorter. His stomach filled with nerves at the thought of how much of his long hair would be chopped tomorrow, but he knew he needed it with how damaged and dry his hair was.

Jake crawled into bed and pulled up your Instagram to see if you had done anything fun lately to try to calm his nerves about what he was going to ask you to do to his hair. 

He remembers the day you followed him back, over a year ago, he felt like he had won the lottery. Every now and then, you two would DM back and forth, sending each other silly or interesting posts. Jake didn’t post often, but his stomach always filled with butterflies when he would see you like his posts or leave a comment.

He saw your recent post from a couple days prior that he had missed and smiled as he scrolled through your photo dump. He loved your bright smile and rosy cheeks that shone in each photo of you with your friends and family. Once he swiped to the last photo, his heart dropped. It was you and a man he didn’t recognize from your other posts, wrapped up in each other's arms at the top of a hike somewhere. Jake frantically tapped the tagged username, scrolling through the profile that unbeknownst to him, was for your high school best friend who had moved out west and was in a committed relationship with his partner. Once Jake saw the series of recent photos of your friend with his partner, relief washed over him. 

He sighed as he flopped back onto his bed, realizing that he was in way too deep for someone that won’t even hang out with him in a group setting. Jake decided that he would invite you to do something, one last time tomorrow, and if you declined his invitation, he would try to move on, even though the thought of that broke his heart. 

•

•

The next day was sunny and warm, putting a smile on your face as you walked to work in the morning. The weather was great, you were in one of your favorite comfy work outfits, and you knew you’d get to see a couple of your favorite clients today. 

The morning went by quickly and before you knew it, the twins arrived and were up front. 

“Hey guys!” You greeted them cheerfully. Josh popped out of his seat and smothered you in a big hug. “My sweet girl! How are you?”

You giggled and let go of Josh, missing the frustrated look on Jake’s face behind you.

Did he seriously just call her that?

“I’m great! It’s so good to see you both. How are you guys doing?” You spun towards Jake and he gave you a nervous smile. You didn’t initiate a hug and his smile fell a little. 

“I’m good, except for the fact that my brother got a hug and I didn’t.” God, that made me sound so pathetic.

You rolled your eyes playfully as you tugged Jake’s arm into you and lightly wrapped your arms around his waist as his came around your upper back. “Let it be known that the first hug was forced upon me but this one I’m choosing to partake in.” You teased, looking up at Jake, and his cheeks turn pink as Josh scoffs. You let go of Jake and wave both boys back to your area. It’s a quiet afternoon, so your chair and the one next to you are both open.

It’s no surprise to you when Josh flops into your chair, signaling that he’ll go first. Despite being completely head over heels for you, Jake still hates getting his hair cut and always lets his brothers go first if they’re there with him. Jake slides into the other chair and turns to face you and Josh.

You run your fingers through Josh’s curls. “I kind of like how loose your curls are,” you say, “I don’t really want to perm it today.”

Josh nodded. “If you could just clean up the sides and trim the rest, I think I’ll be good.”

You know Josh well enough to know exactly what he wants and you hum in agreement as you throw the cape around him. “We’ll be right back, Jake.” You say as Josh gets up. Jake silently nods and goes back to twiddling his fingers in the chair. 

You wash Josh’s hair and give him a scalp massage and he sighs. “I swear your fingers are magic.” He says loud enough for his brother to hear, trying to get a rise out of him. Jake rubs his face out of annoyance, but your response quells his anxiety.

“Stop being weird.” You snort as you turn the water off and wring his hair out. You take Josh back to your chair and comb his curls and pin them up. You grab your clippers and run them up the sides of his head, then trim up the rest of his longer hair as you two chat, Jake staying quiet next to you both. Running curl product through it, you diffuse his curls and he’s done within a matter of minutes. 

“What do you think?” You ask him. “Perfect, as always. You’re the best.” He responds and your cheeks darken at his compliment. 

Josh gets out of the chair and smacks his twin on the side of his head. “Your turn!” He says loudly.

Jake stands and sits in your chair without a word. You begin to run your fingers through the ends of his long unkempt waves. “You’re being awfully quiet today.” You tell him and he shrugs nervously. “Mind if we take these off?” You point to his sunglasses and before Jake has the chance to open his mouth, you’ve come around to his front and gently grasp both sides of his sunglasses and slide them off of his face. You turn to put his glasses on the counter and miss the way Jake’s lips part slightly out of shock and the deep blush that runs across his cheeks. Josh silently snickers, watching his brother. 

You come back around to be behind Jake and grab your brush, knowing your fingers will not be successful in detangling his hair. His hair is the longest it’s ever been and flows down his back and chest, but it’s unfortunately riddled with split ends and damage. He only lets you trim the very ends off every time he comes in because he hates getting his hair cut that badly. 

You brush his frizzy waves out and look at him in the mirror. “Just the usual? Quarter inch off your ends?” 

Jake clears his throat, his nerves rising. “Actually um, I wanted to try something different today.” He says quietly. 

It’s your turn to be shocked now. “No way! Like what?” 

“Well, we’re doing this whole ‘back to our roots’ thing, and that’s kind of what Josh did with his hair when he changed it all those months ago, and my hair used to be a lot shorter, like before I knew you, so um, maybe like that?” Jake stammers.

You don’t want to allude to how excited you are to actually give him a real haircut that he desperately needs, so you calmly ask him if he has any photos while you run your fingers through his hair.

Jake is distracted by the feeling of your fingers running through his waves. He fumbles, grabbing his phone out of his pocket and his hands are shaking a little from nerves as he pulls up his Instagram. Your heart aches for him as you notice how nervous he is. “See this from like 6 or 7 years ago? Maybe like that?” He says as he holds his phone up.

You peer at his screen to see his hair hitting a little below his shoulders in a poofy one length style. It was very cute on him for sure, but with your skill, you knew you could give him a style that would be more interesting and fit his personality well. 

“Hmm,” you hum as you run your fingers through his hair again, noticing that it seemed to soothe Jake a little, “that would definitely be good for the health of your hair, you’ve got a lot of damage going on. But maybe we could take this idea and give you the grown up rockstar version with some layers? Maybe take it shorter than these photos but still around your shoulders? That would be super fun. Does that sound okay to you?” 

He gives you a soft smile despite his nerves. He’s unsure what’s making him more nervous right now, the idea of cutting his hair short or being around you. “Whatever you think would look best.” He softly tells you. 

You can tell he’s a little unsure of such a big change. You wrap your arms around his shoulders from behind the chair and look at him in the mirror. He’s blushing again as you make eye contact. “This is going to be so cute on you, Jake! I’m so excited.” You say with a big smile and he gives you another small one in return as he nods. 

You stand up straight and push his long hair to one side as you grab the cape and fasten it around his neck. You notice goosebumps rising where your fingers brush his skin and you smirk a little. “Let’s get you washed up,” you tell him as you turn to walk over to the shampoo bowls. He stands up and Josh gives him an encouraging pat on the back as he walks by.

Jake sits down and is rigid as a board. You place your fingers on his shoulders and try to get him to lean back. “Relax Jake, this is going to turn out so good.” You tell him. He sighs as he tries to settle in. “I know, I trust you, I just hate getting my haircut and this is a pretty big change.” 

You start to wash his hair and notice his eyes close as you work your fingers into his scalp. “I’m proud of you, though. It can be scary changing something about yourself. You’re being brave.” You encourage him and he smiles with his eyes closed. “Thank you.” He says softly and you look down at him fondly as you finish washing his hair. 

Walking back over to your station, he sits down gingerly as if the chair is going to swallow him up and eat him whole.

You grab his shoulders carefully and lean him back so he’s sitting against the back of the chair. “I promise I’ll take good care of you.” You tell him quietly, so only he can hear, and he runs a hand over his face. “I know, you’re the only one I’d ever trust to do something like this for me.” He admits shyly.

It’s your turn to blush and you break eye contact as you focus on detangling his wet hair. Jake notices the color flushing your cheeks and he smiles. 

Josh is observing both of you silently and sends his brother a text when you walk to the back to grab different products for Jake’s hair.

Josh: Are you seeing the way she’s looking at you? And talking to you? And touching you? If you don’t ask her out today, you’re an idiot.

Jake: Really? Are you sure?

Josh: YES. This is painful. Make a move once we are ready to leave. 

You come back and Jake hastily closes his messages as you continue combing his hair. You section the sides out and pin them up and section and pin up most of the back of his hair, too. A small section is left hanging down his back. 

Jake is beginning to squirm as you get closer and closer to starting his haircut. “Are you ready?” You ask him, seeing his nervous movements in the chair. You want to make sure he really wants this as it’s such a big change, especially for him. “We can do something less drastic, or just a little trim if you want.” 

“No, I’m ready, I’m good.” He tells you. 

You nod and tilt his head down a little. Your comb is brought to where his neck and shoulders meet and you bring the scissors up. You glance down and see a good 6-7 inches of hair about to be cut off. “Okay,” you say, “I’m going to get started.” Jake doesn’t dare move his head, but moves his hand out from under the cape to give you a thumbs up silently. It’s such a Jake gesture that you almost laugh a little.

You close the scissors around his hair and watch the long locks fall to the ground. You continue snipping the rest of the section short, more and more of Jake’s hair falling.

You let down the next section and comb it out. “It’s looking good so far, Jake.” You say and Josh agrees. Jake gives you a nervous, close-lipped smile in the mirror that doesn’t quite reach his eyes.

“So, what can you tell me about the new album?” You ask Jake, trying to get him to talk about something that you know he’s excited about. You continue combing and snipping and the gentle tugs and sounds of your shears cutting what feels like most of his hair off is distracting to Jake.

“Well, um, we finished it a few weeks ago.” He starts. You give an interested hum and he continues. “It’s, it’s interesting really because we recorded the entire album live together instead of each of us recording parts separately like a lot of musicians do.”

You stop cutting and look at him. “That’s so cool!” You say genuinely and he blushes again and rubs his chin. “Yeah, we are a live band at our core for sure so it made sense.” He mumbles.

“Well, I can’t wait to hear it.” You say as you finish cutting the back to just barely hit his shoulders and unclip the sides. His long hair tumbles down his chest for the last time. You pull the last of his long hair to the back and begin to cut it to just skim his shoulders as well. His hair is now definitely a few inches shorter than the photos he showed you, but you had a vision for how you wanted his hair to turn out and you knew he would love it when it was all done. 

You finish cutting and ask him if he wants to see what’s been done so far. “Still needs layers, but it’s looking so great Jake, I think you’re really going to like it.” You tell him and Josh stands up to see how Jake’s hair ended up behind his shoulders.

“Looking good, brother.” He says encouragingly.

“Yeah, go ahead and show me the damage.” Jake chuckles nervously.

You grip the ends of his hair and with little effort, push it in front of his shoulders. He gasps as he sees how short his hair is. “Oh wow, this is different,” he says as he takes in the change in his appearance, “it looks a lot healthier.” You rub his shoulder reassuringly and notice the blunt ends of his hair tickling the back of your hand.

“It was pretty damaged Jake, but this is already looking amazing on you.” You tell him truthfully and he nods. He runs his hands through his hair and smiles as he feels how soft and healthy the ends feel. “I like this a lot,” he muses, “feels a lot like ‘me.’”

“I’m glad you think so, I agree.” you say as you begin combing his hair out again. You begin cutting a face frame and lots of layers, trimming more and more of his hair. After several more minutes of cutting and hair filling up Jake’s lap, you’re satisfied with his shaggy bob. You run wave product through his hair with your fingers and his eyes flutter shut involuntarily. 

“This takes two seconds to put in your hair, but it will help your waves pop and not be frizzy.” You tell him and his eyes open and he nods. You diffuse his hair and mess it up a little with your fingers once it’s dry. You’re in love with how his hair turned out, seeing how it accentuates his gorgeous face.

“What do you think?” You ask and he grins as you take the cape off and he messes with his hair himself. He pushes his wavy hair behind his ears and the face framing pieces fall forward and your heart does a flip, seeing how cute he looks. “I love it,” he tells you with a big smile on his face, “I never would have asked for this myself but you did amazing, as always.” 

“Aww, thanks Jakey.” You tease as he stands up and turns to his brother. “What do you think, Josh?”

“I think you may surpass me as the most handsome member of the band, maybe.” Josh answers with a toothy grin. “Looks great.”

Jake grabs his sunglasses and puts them on his shirt as you walk them to the front and they pay.

“Great seeing you both, as always. Don’t be strangers!” You say as you go to hug them both goodbye. Jake hangs on for a second longer than he should for a friendly hug and he clears his throat as he realizes this and steps back. Jake and Josh make eye contact and Josh swiftly says his goodbyes and steps out with the excuse that he has to make a phone call. 

Jake turns to you, his nerves seemingly returning as he looks into your eyes and runs a hand through his hair, noticing there’s a lot less for his fingers to pull through. 

“So, I was thinking, um, I know we’ve invited you out before to hang out and stuff and you’ve always said no but, I-I was wondering if maybe you’d want to come by our office and I could show you some of our new music?” He asks timidly and you feel butterflies erupt in your chest. 

“You want to show me your new music?!” You ask him, shocked.

He nods and smiles. “I would love to. You’ve always been one of our biggest supporters since we moved out here.”

You take a deep breath, knowing you’re about to break your own rules, but something in the back of your brain is telling you that it’ll be so worth it for the sweet man standing before you. “That’s so cool of you to offer Jake, I would love to.”

The biggest smile breaks out across his face, his dimple popping and everything. He can’t believe you’ve agreed to spend some time with him, especially alone. “Are you free Saturday? Or Sunday? Or any day really, I could make anything work. Even today, later, anything-.”

You chuckle as you cut off his rambling. “I don’t work on the weekends, is Saturday okay?” 

He nods enthusiastically and you hand him your phone with the contacts page pulled up. “Give me your number and I’ll text you.” You say with a soft smile and he looks at you sweetly as he takes your phone.

“Wow, I finally get your number after over three years? I don’t have to DM you on Instagram to talk anymore?” He says with a joking tone and you giggle. He hands you your phone back and you slide it into your pocket without looking.

“Let’s plan on Saturday morning, 10:00?” He asks. There’s something behind his eyes that looks like he wants to say something else, but he doesn’t. 

“Perfect,” you say, “I can’t wait.”

“Me too.” he grins. “Thanks again for making me look good today.”

Feeling brave, you reach up to ruffle his hair and tuck some behind his ear before pulling him into another hug. He’s so flustered by that and it takes him a second before he wraps his arms around you. 

“No problem, rockstar.” You say as you unwrap your arms from around him. His cheeks are bright red as you pull back. 

“S-see you Saturday,” he manages to get out and you wave as he turns to leave. 

Once he’s gone, you pull your phone out and see he added an emoji next to his name in your contacts. You smile, seeing he picked the red guitar emoji to follow his name.

Maybe, some rules are meant to be broken.

[siryouarebeingmocked]

Glass Onion (2022): Mixed company, mixed feelings

This movie is very Current Year, even though it finished shooting in 2021 and is set in May 2020. One minor joke early on; Blanc plays Among Us during lockdown, because he's so bored.

I am not making that up.

I had the same issue with the first movie. I wasn't sure what all the Topical References™ added to the movie. And I know we love to say that great art is timeless.

But as someone who actually does read a lot of old, public-domain, popular books, many  had topical social issues in them. Heck, the first Doc Thorndyke book is about fingerprinting, which was cutting edge science at the time, and even makes a self-depreciating joke about it's inspiration, Sherlock Holmes.

I've enjoyed the odd Clancy or Connelly or Cussler or Cavanaugh or Patterson thriller. And those tend to be pretty topical. (obnoxiously so, in one case) Not to mention my love of the Vorkosigan Saga, which was so progressive in the 80s it's still progressive now.

I've also seen stories that had poorly integrated topical issues and much better-handled ones in the same show. The same episode, even.

So I don't know why the political stuff in the two movies rankled. I'd say my issue is "politics I disgree with", but I just mentioned enjoying a book series which is clearly waaay to my left.

Heck, both movies are blatantly inspired by Agatha Christie, and I distinctly recall topical stuff in my mum's old copy of *Third Girl*.

Like, literally the whole plot.

I read it a long time ago, but I think I'd still enjoy it.

Other, less important criticism. And spoilers.

-Blanc intially felt like a caricature, which was very different from the way he appeared in the first movie. turns out that's deliberate. He later says he was playing up the folksy Southernness.

Even though he's an internationally famous detective who lives in a $10,000,000 Park Avenue penthouse.

Don't ask me about the high-waisted pants, the cute little scarf around his neck, or the 19th century bathing costume he wears to the pool. Apparently his style in this movie was partially Daniel Craig's idea.

Also, he's gay.

It's not made explicitly clear during the film, and the guy he's living with could be a roomie or friend or assistant, but Johnson confirmed it. I'm not sure what it adds to the film, except an explanation for the scarf.

And also some irony when Birdie flirts with him, even though he's famous and probably publicly known to be gay. Heck, just his visible discomfort in those scenes would be irony enough, whether or not he liked women.

Miles Bronn -possible shallow Elon musk parody --he’s fooling people w/ fake genius, when he's really just a charismatic idiot. And one who gets swindled, possibly. -There's one bit of irony. Early on, Miles guests on his private island get a COVID vaccine. It later turns out Miles is an idiot.

Since the movie takes place entirely in May 2020, the implication is that Miles should know it's basically impossible to develop a proper vaccine in just a few short months.

Cough.

The actual main protagonist isn't Blanc, it's Cassandra "Andi" Brand and Helen Brand. Andi is a tech genius who Miles ripped off. And also murdered. So her twin sister Helen, a teacher, steps in.

Anyone familiar with the Trojan War is probably going "hey, wait a minute..." Did I mention that this takes place on a Greek island in the Aegean Sea? Which has Troy on its borders?

And the first things we see in the film are tantalizing wooden boxes?

Helen poses as Andi with Blanc's help, so they can investigate the murder and figure out which of Miles friends, “the Disruptors”, killed Andi.

Both Brands are played by Janelle Monae. A famously left-wing singer and actress, whose biggest film role was in the movie Hidden Figures, where she played one of a team of black women in STEM forgotten by history.

And in this movie, Monae plays two hidden figures, eclipsed by white men. One maliciously, one charitably.

Birdie --Birdie is an idiotic middle-aged singer who keeps getting cancelled because she does dumb stuff. -She sexually harasses Blanc. This is possibly why Blanc's gay, to make it extra ironic. -She's introduced at a party during lockdowns. When she arrives at the island, she wears a completely decorative facemask.

-Birdie prides herself on her honesty. In this case, it means she's inconsiderate and narcissistic, with no filter. Which makes it kinda ironic (or something?) when the day is saved in the end by a combination of lies and truth.

Duke -Dave Bautista plays an alt-right mra. Supposedly.

-He supports a girlfriend and his mother, who abuses him. He's  three or four times mom's size. He goes "Mom, I told you not to interrupt when I'm recording!" and she physically slaps him. Not even any ramp-up, she just does it.

She also tries to disrupt his call with his friends by "helping" him solve Miles' puzzle box, right up until it's done, and she stops caring.

So the show decided to mock MRAs by...making one a male victim of domestic violence and emotional abuse from a woman.

And from what I saw on Youtube, plenty of people didn't notice the irony. In fact, I found an official Netflix short of the scene, and the comments were glad he was getting "put in his place" because he politely asked him mom to let him do his job.

Also, remember when I mentioned how Birdie sexually harasses Blanc?

This movie includes two examples of the exact sort of issues MRAs talk about all the time.

-I know he's supposed to be a parody, but of who, exactly? jordan peterson? andrew tate? Pewdiepie? All of the above?

I think they even got some alex jones in there when they mention how he sold pills. Specifically, "performance" pills for men, made from rhino horn.

-Duke carries a gun near his crotch at all times for most of the movie. Specifically, an underpowered Tokarev, I've read. On top of the abuse, he also self-cucks himself so his GF can try and pillow-talk Miles into supporting Duke's next endeavour.

Subtle.

And while I was looking up the gun, I found someone on /r/liberalGunOwners saying "well, maybe it's supposed to look Russian because he's pro-Putin like a lot of right-wingers?"

That's possible, but it would be a really obtuse reference in a movie chock full of really blatant references.

-Also, there's something a tad ironic about a supposedly (alt-)right influencer being a large, muscular, tattoo'd Hispanic man. Unless that's supposed to be a tan.

Claire -Claire is a left-wing, environmentally friendly politician. She wears beige, and always looks terrible (to Katheryn Hahn's frustration). She's also a hypocrite.

Some TVTropes editor: it's about progressive politicans that gradually turn conservative.

No, the message here isn't "conservatives bad". It's "hypocritical left-wing politicians are bad". And I'm not sure about the "left-wing" part.

Duke is a hypocrite because he self-cucks for advantage, and is also physically abused by his tiny little mom. Claire is just a straight up liar, as politicians often are. There's a contrast between his performative peacocking in every aspect of the way he presents himself, and Claire's beige cold mess.

I'm not kidding. That was the stated intent of her costume and makeup.

-claire calls duke an MRA. I'm not sure if the writers were wrong, Claire's wrong, or Duke actually calls himself an MRA in-universe. He's certainly a traditionalist, which MRAs usually aren't. He also wants women to get back in the kitchen, which MRAs usually don't.

And finally, there's Miles’ No 2., tech wizard Lionel, who spins Miles' straw - or napkin ideas - into gold. In fact, he spends most of the movie with a gold wishbone pin on his lapel. GEDDIT?

Duke is a right wing tradcon MRA who cares about physical appearances even though he has a bad social rep, Claire is a left-wing progressive with a terrible physical appearance and a good social rep, Birdie is an idiot who keeps saying un-PC things, and Lionel is the smart guy, who is apparently more or less apolitical.

Also, the movie has obvious inspiration from Christie's "And Then There Were None". And maybe Clue. Or Among Us.

Or all three.

[ruiniel]

Prickly thorns, tender roses

Fandom: Castlevania series (2017-2021)

Rating: Mature🔞

Relationship: Alucard/Original Female Character

Characters: Alucard, Original Character(s)

Summary:

Set after the events of Castlevania (Netflix) Season III. After the betrayal of his young apprentices, Alucard feels barely alive in his lonesome castle. Days wear on, chipping away at his mind and sanity. And what is the son of Dracula to do with this unwanted visitor, suddenly come at his doorstep? Often the prickly thorn produces tender roses - Ovid

Chapter tags & warnings: Dark Romanticism, Inspired by Castlevania, personal interpretation of post-season III Alucard, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Post-Castlevania Season III, Illness

V. Once was enough

She was being carried purposefully into an unknown direction by a stiff and grim lord of the castle. When he had removed the manacle trapping her ankle and leaned over her, the first impulse was to cower away in afeared suspicion. But her weakness was so great Ravenna could do nothing when his hands slipped beneath her, lifting her off the bed.

“Where are you taking me?” That he was not dragging her away in chains partially pacified her. It meant she may not be heading to her death after all.

“To a place with fewer odds of killing you,” his voice vibrated against the side of her face.

She tried breathing evenly but crumpled in on herself, her head falling heavily against him, despite her unease. “There is such a place here?” Ravenna asked, another bout of coughing the punishment for her wit.

A stubborn smile made its way to his lips, one she thankfully did not see. “Believe it or not,” Alucard replied.

Ravenna fell silent, aware that she would be incapable of fighting against him even if she tried. And so the woman renounced any thoughts of bravery and let her body go soft in his hold, feeling weaker as time wore on. She discerned a flat, repetitive thrum; the beating of a heart? She faintly wondered if vampires functioned as humans did. Were they not undead, by all means? A scientific explanation for their traits must exist, but unfortunately, it lay shrouded in mystery. In the minds of most denizens of the world today, these undiscovered laws of existence were the makings of arcane and loathsome magic, to be feared and destroyed.

They reached a spacious room where flames burned in an enormous stone fireplace, and Ravenna saw a few pieces of furniture scattered across the chamber. Most of it was in disarray, as with everything else she had seen so far.

He laid the ailing woman onto a long divan and turned away. Ravenna listened to his footsteps receding as she lay there, facing the flames. She had to admit this place was better indeed, and the warmth was welcome, the fire drying to her damp skin.

When the stranger returned, she heard objects being placed onto a table somewhere behind her in the fire-lit study. He neared her again, running up the sleeves of his white shirt, his gaze sweeping over her with utter indifference. The strangest being she had ever met then went and washed his hands in a basin placed on a table in one corner before he approached, carrying a bowl. He set it down on the floor within reach of her and stepped back, crossing his arms.

Ravenna looked to the contents, and what appeared to be strips of wood shavings.

“Willow bark,” she rasped, finding his gaze.

“For the pain and fever.”

“I know,” she coughed. Her shaking hand reached for the bowl, and she brought a few pieces into her mouth, chewing slowly.

“And do you know what you have?” came that same, unnervingly calm voice as he turned away again, only to return, holding a wet cloth.

“Short breathing, harsh cough... and pain in the side... fever,” Ravenna counted weakly. “… pneumonia. As per Maimonides… estimated year... 1200 AD.”

“You know your books.” Somehow, he succeeded to make that sound insulting. He placed the wet cloth on her forehead. “Then you also know you may die from it, and I am no physician on human ailments.”

“You know of physicians?...” The surprise was great.

He nodded, then looked towards the window, clearly not disposed to say more.

“Why are you helping?” Ravenna had to know, searching his face for any changes.

The scourge turned his blank gaze on her then, and it was so empty she felt a different type of chill, deep in her bones.

“I asked myself the same only moments ago. Is it your wish to be left to die?”

“No, of course not—” Ravenna managed, too weary to be incensed by his manner. But all of this came in such contrast to the... adornments set before his gate.

“Then rest,” he said, “And there is water.” He pointed to an ewer placed at the foot of the divan.

Ravenna was so depleted all other questions drained from her mind, and despite her fears, soon enough her eyes were closing. She fell into a long, troubled sleep.

When the young woman awakened, the burning had subsided from what she could tell, and her limbs felt less heavy. Ravenna reached for the water by her side and drank heartily. Once she was sated, her red-rimmed eyes flitted across the room, finding its other occupant. He had taken his place in a high armchair facing the hearth some distance away, on the opposite side of the divan. Silent, motionless; his elbow propped against the armrest, his face resting in his palm.

This was quite the turn of events. First, he prevents her demise, then he frightens her, threatens her, and now that she fell ill, he is… tending to her? This volatility was distressing, but what other choice did she have now? Here she was, trapped at the whim of a moody vampire. It was possible her previous thought would ring true. Maybe not for long, came the stab of doubt, if her newly gained affliction had anything to say in the matter.

“How are you…. how are you immune to the threat of daylight?” A good start as any to a conversation, considering the circumstances of their encounter. Or so she thought.

There was no reaction or response, as if her question went unheard. Ravenna looked at him, still sunken into his seat, looking utterly tired and worn. She seethed, retreating into silence. Hours passed, and the woman drifted in and out of awareness, coughing on her side from time to time. She felt the compress being changed, and the renewed chill on her forehead felt like a blessing each time.

Ravenna opened her eyes, late after another bout of fitful rest, to see the vampire crouched before the fireplace, stoking the fire. The light of red flames crawled up the chamber walls and gleamed on his pale-gold hair. No more than a ghost, he seemed, though Ravenna could not deny the distracting nature of his appearance. He was… perhaps about her own age in years? But she knew that with vampires these things were relative and deceiving more often than not.

“Well,” she broke the silence anew, “Since you are attempting to help me, or at least I think you are, I don’t suppose your design includes spiking me before your gate?”

He stilled his movements, if only for a breath, and looked over his shoulder at her. “That depends.”

“On what?...” Ravenna decided to bite.

“On whether or not you cease asking questions,” he grumbled softly, rising to his feet.

Ravenna scoffed. He had settled on being the fifth wall in the room. So be it. Her eyes roamed over the enclosure for anything of use, for any answers as to this place and the nature of its owner. She noticed a peculiar object, propped against a desk close to the armchair. A painting. It was the portrait of a young, golden-haired woman. She wore a violet dress and carried a bouquet of white lily flowers, her face fair and joyful; there was a strange familiarity to it, but Ravenna could not place it. Not the usual furnishing to be found in the lair of a vampire.

The woman watched him retake his seat, allowing the armchair to swallow him. His shirt was still rolled up to his elbows, and a pale forearm fell lifelessly over the armrest.

He appeared young, but then so old as if tied to an ancient sorrow that reminded the woman of certain Greek tragedies of old she read in lonesome seminars, during her formative years. Was this the burden of age, or that of the malice these dangerously superior creatures carried about them? Her eyes were closing on the last thought.

“You said you sought something here.”

Her eyes snapped open, but it was her turn to be silent now. He would not even give her his name, and now…

Moments passed before she heard a long-suffering sigh, and Ravenna turned her head to see him pinch the bridge of his nose, frowning as though he were utterly spent. Perhaps he was.

“Adrian is my name.”

An unwieldy smirk made its way onto her tired features. One step forward. “I come from Styria.”

“Styria?” he asked, gazing into the fire with a thoughtful mien. “You speak the local language well.”

“I was fortunate enough to have access to the right resources.”

“Reading is a powerful skill,” Adrian murmured absently. “I believe this world would do much better if it were a widespread practice.”

“Maybe someday,” Ravenna chimed, before catching herself. It was strange how disarmingly open he had been mere moments ago. Perhaps there was a way.

“I answered your question,” the vampire drawled with a slow flick of his wrist.

Ravenna was taken by a cough again - a long, throat-hissing endeavor that left her gasping and shivering. She barely felt something soft and warm cast at her feet and rose slowly to reach for the thick throw he had placed there, dutifully pulling the material across her frame. When she calmed well enough, Ravenna continued as he retook his seat.

“I seek a prominent family of monster hunters. They call themselves the Belmont Clan.” She watched him for any change in his expression, but there was nothing. “Surely you must have heard of them? We think they possess vast knowledge gathered through the ages in their trade, and I need their help. By word of mouth and research, I discovered my way into this area on my quest.” She paused, waiting for any sort of acknowledgment, but there came none. “… as I left the inn from the last village, a score of those insane traveling monks roaming these parts of your land pursued me. They must have overheard my questions, though nobody would answer them, which was strange to me. They thought me a witch or who knows what else. It was then I learned the Belmonts are not so well-liked here. The rest you know.” She waited.

For a good while, there was no sound but the crackling hiss of the fire as the flames of the hearth danced lazily in his golden eyes.

“The Belmonts are dead, and their home was destroyed. Your journey is in vain,” the soft words struck her, laced with icy bitterness.

Ravenna frowned. Trust a vampire to say such things. “What... what happened to them?” she asked, either way, fearing the answer she was already suspecting, her hope stubborn in the face of his dismissive manner.

“People happened.” Sharp words, like shards of broken glass. “As usual.”

“I do not believe it.”

“That is your folly,” he muttered, his head falling back against the armchair.

Disgruntled and disappointed, the young woman cursed it all. She cursed her long journey and her eager hope, she cursed the group of waylayers who had chased her to kill her for values they were unwilling to understand, and she cursed this vampire, who sliced through her purpose with his careless words. Pressure grew in her chest, up her throat, and stubborn tears of frustration beckoned but were blinked away. Her body and mind yearned for more rest, and so Ravenna slumped into the divan, sighing as her eyes rolled back, surrendering to another bout of restless sleep.

It was the middle of the night when he rose from his place. Slow, hesitant steps took him to where the woman lay abed. He bent and lifted the fallen throw at the foot of the divan, carelessly throwing it back over the sleeping stranger. She looked less feverish, and her breathing sounded marginally better.

Once again, at the crossroads, he thought, the memory of pleading faces and hopeful eyes causing a wrenching tug. The one once calling himself Alucard stood still for a mere second turned endless moment, watching the only other soul trapped in the shell of the past that was his home. Just then, her lip quivered and Ravenna frowned in her sleep, wrinkling her nose at a rebel strand of hair tickling her face. When he failed to rein a smile, he shook himself.

Fool.

He had learned a costly, no less important lesson well enough the first time. And once was enough. His gaze strayed to the window; not too far away, the remains of the Belmont estate loomed wretchedly among towering trees, the ruins kissed by the light of a grey moon.

Yes, once was enough.

NEXT

[staydandy]

Rugal (2020) - 루갈 - Whump List

List by StayDandy Synopsis : Kang Ki Beom is an elite police officer whose attempt to bring down Argos, a nationwide criminal organization, results in a group of masked assailants from Argos killing his family and blinding him. Kang wakes up in a hospital only to find himself accused of murdering his own family. Then he is approached with an offer to become a member of Rugal, a special team with abilities aided by biotechnology. He receives two artificial eyes with Rugal's tech built into them, and with them gains unique new abilities with which to take down criminal organizations. Kang Ki Beom and Rugal set out on a mission to wipe out Argos. (MDL)

Whumpee : Kang Ki Beom played by Choi Jin Hyuk

Country : 🇰🇷 South Korea Genres : Action, Thriller, Crime, Sci-Fi, Bromance

Notes : This is a Partial List - I didn't list every bit of whump, just what caught my attention the most • Adapted from the webtoon of the same name • This list is a little rough .. my list style has definitely changed since I originally wrote this one.

Episodes on List : 7 Total Episodes : 16

*Spoilers below*

1 : Kang Ki Beom is tangled in a yakuza conspiracy, he & his wife are targeted, he’s blinded then recruited & given bionic eyes

3 : (near end) Eyes are forcefully shut down, passes out

4 : The shutdown opened an opportunity for the eye's AI to awaken, the first interaction paralyzes him.

7 : Eyes fail, blind

9 : Eye AI is making him hallucinate

13 : Passes out from shock

14 : Eye AI tries to take control ... rips out the computer chip from his neck to stop it, passes out

More Whump Lists for this show: whumperfect

[solradguy]

hi! can you tell your whole process for learning japanese on your own? where did you start? what resources did you utilise? how did you find and manage your time and maintain discipline? also, how long did it take you to reach fluency?

I am sooooo far from fluent hahaha I'm stumbling through this language Gromit-style

Ok, so, circa 2014 I was studying Norwegian because I really wanted to learn a secondary language (thx American school system...) and I really liked the cadence/feel of Norwegian. That was my entire reason for studying it, I just liked how it sounded lol. But by 2016 I'd learned enough of it from Duolingo that it was time to move on to more difficult study materials.

Which I could not find for the life of me.

I got frustrated and decided it'd probably be best to pick up another language. Japanese was the one I saw the most since a lot of my favorite artists are Japanese, some of my best inking supplies come from Japan (with Japanese packaging), and there used to be a really good local Japanese restaurant too (RIP). Duolingo had just launched an absolutely shit Japanese course that motivated me to look for better practice materials.

I think I started practicing the kana through just writing them a whole bunch before finding out about Tofugu's hiragana and katakana mnemonics-based study articles. From there I did the three free levels offered by Wanikani. Wanikani is awesome, I learned a lot through that program and wish the full version one-time purchase was more affordable... It's worth it, I'm just broke haha

After a while I lost interest in studying Japanese because it's so difficult/time consuming and tried out reconstructed Classical Latin (HARD!), Norwegian again, and just barely dipped my toes into Esperanto. About a year before I got into Guilty Gear (2020), I picked up Japanese again by refreshing my progress on Wanikani. The Duolingo course still sucked but it had gotten a tiny bit better with its kana study tool, though I dropped it again before long. What helped the most this time were books. I tried out these:

Genki - Not bad. I liked how it broke down parts of grammar. However, it's definitely written for a classroom setting. The topics/vocabulary were all school themed and, on top of feeling like I was missing vital information by self-studying, it just got boring.

Tae Kim's Guide to Learning Japanese - This has a physical version but I read it through the free app/website. Much more advanced than Genki, but made for self-study and as a grammatical reference tool. It went a bit over my head and was too fast-paced, I learn kinda slow... Now that I'm much better at Japanese, I should try it again.

Japanese From Zero - My favorite of the books I tried. Goes slower, made more for self-study, and has some free supplemental materials on their website.

While Japanese From Zero was working great, I was losing interest again because my brain CRAVES variety. Straight up translating stories has helped me more than anything else. Japanese Short Stories for Beginners by LingoMastery was a good investment alongside Barron’s Japanese Grammar by Carl and Nobuo Akiyama and Japanese Verbs & Essentials of Grammar by Rita L. Lampkin to help with grammar concepts Japanese Short Stories doesn't expand on enough. IMABI (website) is also a very good grammar reference guide. It can be a bit dry, but I like that. It doesn't waste time and is very direct.

Lingodeer has been invaluable too. The free version is smartphone app only, but that's fine since I usually study right before bed anyway. It has a 5 minute quiz that's just snappy enough to refresh my knowledge without being so long that my brain gets bored of the repetition. The lesson modules also do a really great job at explaining grammatical concepts. There are some other study tools, like specific ones for practicing grammar and vocabulary, that I like.

Then in 2021 I got into Guilty Gear. Boy, did I get into Guilty Gear. Translating GG books has helped me more than all of these other materials combined (except the Tofugu kana articles). HIGHLY recommend going a little crazy for a piece of Japanese media if you wanna learn the language.

I can't speak it for shit though, to be honest lmao. But I set out learning it to read things so that's fine; there are very, very, few Japanese speakers where I live anyway. What I mean by this is that I don't have any materials to suggest for learning how to speak it or to improve listening comprehension, sorry...

If I'm not currently working on a translation project (which counts as studying!!), I try to do at least one of these forms of practice each day:

10-15 minutes of Lingodeer

Do Anki flashcards until I get bored. There's a deck that's all 60 levels of Wanikani, though Wanikani itself is still better.

Practice kana stroke order for the ones I still sometimes struggle with （ツ、シ、ン、ソ......）and at least 5 kanji

Read something in Japanese. Lately this's been Japanese-English Translation: An Advanced Guide by Judy Wakabayashi

There's a page on my Neocities with some study tools but it needs updated with a few things I've since found that work better:

[metalhead-brainrot]

[Album of the day] World Eaters - Demo MK-1

Guelph, ON // 2020

[Genres] death metal, war metal

[Themes] In the grim darkness of the far future, there are only riffs...

[FFO] Warhammer 40K*, Bolt Thrower, Chainsword

[Thoughts] You can't traverse the waters of death metal for very long without encountering Warhammer 40K in some form, and I'll confess I count myself a fan.** But you don't need to be a capital-G Gamer to appreciate this ripping demo, a solo project from multi-instrumentalist David Gupta. World Eaters's riffs are as violent as its namesake***, guaranteed to have you itching for the mosh pit. The first two tracks, "Devour" and "Baneblade," will pummel you with energetic rhythm, an auditory siege culminating in the death/doom hellscape of "The Warp" (my very favorite World Eaters song to date).

I picked this demo because I think it's rock-solid, but I'd like to talk about World Eaters's other releases as well. Grinding Advance (2021) is their second EP, doubling down on everything in Demo MK-1. "Armoured Spearhead (Hellhammer)" is six minutes of unbridled energy; "Expedition / Tomb World" is nearly nine minutes, the latter half containing clarinet-infused Nile worship;**** there's even a cover of "Running Up That Hill."

World Eaters's new split, Mothman and the Thunderbirds vs World Eaters, adds two new great tracks to the WE catalogue. It's also the first release without drum programming; joining as the second permanent member, Winter Stomp***** adds ass-kicking blast beats to the bands repertoire. I'm very excited to see more future releases with her style.

Now that Winter Stomp has pledged her gory chainaxe to the sonic blitzkrieg of the World Eaters, the duo have been able to play live. Living outside Ontario I can't say I've been to one of their concerts, but I bet they split skulls; if you live near Guelph, check them out.

Also, I would be remiss for not mentioning that World Eaters has always been very charitable with the profits from their music, leading several donation campaigns for Guelph Pride, an LGBTQ+ nonprofit local to World Eaters's hometown. Winter Stomp has also designed and printed some booty short merch reading, "Be Gay Do Heresy," which tempt me every Bandcamp Friday.******

Thanks for reading the long post today. Keep on killing, maiming, and burning.

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* If you're unfamiliar, Warhammer 40K is a popular tabletop strategy game played with painted miniatures and rolling dice. It's popular with metalheads because the lore is so metal. Indulge me in a quick tl;dr.

It's the 41st century, and the Imperium of Man has spread through the Galaxy under the tutelage of the God Emperor. Though once great, the empire was split 10,000 years prior due to infighting from his übermensch sons, the Primarchs. Now the empire is spread thin across too many star systems, losing the fight against three main threats: the Xenos (other alien civilizations), the Heretics (those who question the authority of a fascist theocracy), and Chaos itself (arcane beings from the Warp, the non-space between wormholes).

The God Emperor sits as a corpse upon his throne on Terra, every ounce of his psychic abilities maintaining the Astronomican, a beacon guiding spaceships throughout the Warp. Every day an increasing number of psychics are sacrificed to fuel his powers, for if the beacon fails, the Imperium collapses and humanity falls.

There are no good guys, and there is no hope. For in the grim darkness of the far future, there is only war.

** Never actually played anything Games Workshop except Necromunda, though I've read a fair few novels. I prefer wargames that won't bleed me for money and bury me in rules, so I mainly play Mantic Games's Kings of War and Firefight. One book for all the rules and force lists at a fraction of the price.

*** The World Eaters are a faction of heretical Space Marines worshipping one of the four Chaos Gods: Khorne, the Blood God, who sits upon a throne made from the skulls of those slain in battle. They are also my favorite faction; he kind of has a Conan-esque backstory of fighting in gladiatorial slave pits. And we all know how much metalheads like Conan.

**** The Egyptian musical themes are themselves referential to the content of the song: Tomb Worlds are the hidden domains of the Necrons, a xenos race that conquered the Galaxy aeons before humanity even gazed at the stars. Annoyed by the emergence of other upstart civilizations, the Dynasties of the Infinite Empire transferred their consciousnesses into mechanical bodies, intending to slumber in hidden tombs until the juvenile races extinguished themselves.

But occasionally something wakes the soulless early, by delving too deep in ancient ruins or experimenting with ancient and unknown tech. And what they find is always ruthless extermination, for the destruction of a Necron's artificial body does not kill a mind capable respawning eternally into an army's worth of mechanical warriors.

***** She's apparently from the Netherlands. Neat.

****** I already have one of their patches on my metal jacket. Very stylish.

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[From the band/label]

Thought for the day: A coward always seeks compromise.

David Gupta: Guitars, Bass, Vocals, Drum Programming Psychic screams from the Immaterium are: Adam Ujhelyi (Teleportise, Hellbreather) Justin Krawczyk (Frank Reynolds, BatBoy) Derek Prince-Cox (Wakeless, Yuzun, ex-Arise and Ruin) Stuart Charlton (First World Famine, Inverted Serpent) Nik Wever (ex-The Story Of..., Time the Destroyer) Recorded, Mixed and, "Mastered" by David Gupta at Doyle House. World Eaters logo and Demo MK-1 artwork by Meytheus Rexy, @meytheusrexy_art

[arliedraws]

Hiii I really love your art! I'm always impressed how ppl like you are able to simplify drawings like this and still get the emotion across! I'd like to ask how long you've been drawing/how long you've been drawing cartoons and how you learned designing your own characters/style and drawing all those face expressions?

🙏🏼🧡

Hi! Thank you so much!!!

Lately, I've been really frustrated with my art and style and technical abilities, so honestly, thank you for giving me a minute to reflect on where I've been! I'm annoyed at the obvious mistakes I am noticing in the things I've posted over the last few weeks but I realized during this that it's always a process and growth is forever.

This got longer than I intended, so I'll put the rest under the cut.

I've been drawing for a very long time, probably for most of my life. And for most of it, I have not been very "good" at it. I had friends who were very serious about drawing in middle school and high school, and in college, I used drawing and fandom to deal with depression and anxiety. Then I started dating late in college which took up all of my spare time for drawing, and then I had a really nasty breakup with my first (emotionally manipulative) partner. I was really depressed (not because of being single but because I didn't know who I was anymore), so I didn't draw or write for yearssssss (I did somewhat but not seriously and loathed everything I was creating).

Then Covid hit and I felt like drawing again.

This was four years ago that I made this comparison of my art. I genuinely like what I was doing in 2012 more than what I put out in 2020. So it's not a matter of how long you've been drawing but consistency and a willingness to take risks (and learn from failures).

You can see I wasn't thinking as 3-dimensionally in 2020 when I started to draw again. The character's expression is really bland and you can see I was focused more on aesthetics than character. I think I even recognized it at the time, and I was really pissed about it.

I guess it's been four years since Covid started, and four years since I really jumped back into drawing regularly. I won't pretend that I know a lot--I very much do not, but here's what has helped me in the last few years.

Think in terms of volume and shape. I always warm up with perspective exercises. I often use posemaniacs' 30 second drawing practice for about 10-15 minutes, or I draw a ton of 3D boxes and spheres and triangles. I like to draw stacked boxes at various angles just so I can get my brain to wake up and see 3-dimensionally.

Know what you want to draw and draw with intention. This sounds obvious, but sometimes, I pick up my pen and just. Draw. Like I'll draw a face or a body but it's just completely soulless and boring because I don't know what I want. Draw with emotion, and have a purpose. Otherwise, your drawing will be lifeless and boring.

Ditch "aesthetics." Seriously. Focus on character. Draw that person ugly. If it's a sexy character and you're focusing on their emotions rather than how attractive they are, it will turn out sexy regardless. For example:

This was supposed to be scary, but people got horny for it anyway.

Anyway.

Your character will determine "aesthetics." Your character wears ripped tights because THEY think it's cool (or they trip a lot and scrape their knees), not because YOU like ripped tights. This is not a hard and fast rule, it's just what works for me.

For example, I don't draw Sirius wearing band t-shirts because I don't think he'd care about Muggle bands (at least, I don't think he'd care enough to advertise that he did). Consider why YOU wear band t-shirts. My partner wears his death metal shirts because he wants to support small bands and talk to strangers who like the same, obscure music (I hate those fucking shirts but he needs to live his truth lol. Some are ok and have beautiful art, but others are gross and weird).

Point is, focus on character.

Side note: If you want to draw a hot character (or if you want to BE a sexy real person honestly lol), you need to internalize this: Sexiness is a state of mind. If you are a sexy, confident person, it doesn't really matter what you look like--people will want to be you or fuck you. This applies to characters as much as it does to real people. It's about being you, focusing on your strengths, recognizing your own worth, keeping boundaries, and giving people your full attention when they speak to you. Seriously. That's basically it. Ask me how I know.

4. Make faces while you draw. I use photo references to understand how the face works, but what helps me the most is when I physically make the same face while I'm drawing. That way, I can feel which muscles are moving in my own face. Plus, I love acting and playing pretend, so I get to "be" that character while I'm drawing. I'm a naturally expressive person and communicate with my eyebrows way too much, and I think you can see that in my drawings.

5. Study other artists. Do this all the time. I particularly love to watch process videos and observe sketches. Here are some videos, books, and artists that I regularly visit or study:

TBChoi -- this person is my favorite artist stylistically. Just search their name + expressions and study. They just understand the way muscles work in the face so well.

Aaron Blaise -- okay, full disclaimer, I've heard some weird things about this artist, so I don't purchase their materials. However, I have practiced with his videos for years and found them exceptionally helpful.

Artists on Instagram I tend to look at: sleepy_kc, krosrios, starbite, rhiwynter

And artists who have influenced me since I was a kid are Tealin, Rufftoon, Shoomlah, Makani, and so many more.

6. Oh. And also, draw things other than people. Draw animals, draw landscapes, draw that weird building. Play with shape and perspective.

And look, I'm not a professional. I am an underpaid English teacher with ADHD, an Intuos Pro, and a horniness for a particular fictional character. Take this with a grain of salt and just do what works for you.