#happy to have it back in my life
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Oh! I forgot to tell you, I started a new skincare routine (more so just switched out different products) my skin is glowing! I fucking love it!
Cleanser - Pure Skin Face Cleanser by First Aid Beauty [day/night] (new!) $24-$42
Exfoliator - Pineapple Exfoliating Powder by Good Molecules [3x a week day/night] (new!) $16
Toner - Hydrating Toner by CeraVe (new!) $11.99
Serum - Flowermelon Hydrating Serum by Kiramoon [daytime] (new) $36 / Hyaluronic Acid Serum by The Inkey List [night] (new!) - $9.99
Moisturize - Moisture Surge 100H by Clinique (didn't change) $29-$84
Since I'm not working, I haven't been able to keep up with my skincare. So, my best friend when out and got me a few things. I told her what I usually use...which is up there in price, so I told her not to spend $200 on me. Just get me what is similar. Now she's an aesthetician, so I trust her judgement and so far, she hasn't let me down.
I have combo skin (oily/dry) and with my glasses it just makes it so much worse. This new routine keeps my skin feeling refreshed without the excess oil that causes my breakouts. And a few of my dark spots have lightened up a lot. So it's a win for me!
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the tradwife movement is the same as it has always been - back in the kitchen, back to breeding - it just has better branding.
when i was younger, i hated pink. i was not like other girls. this is now something i'm embarrassed of - this was not me being a "girl's girl."
but it was expressing something many of us felt at the time: i literally wasn't what girlhood was supposed to be. this is a hard thing to explain, but you know when you're not performing girlhood correctly. it isn't as easy as "i liked x when girls liked y" - because there were other girls that liked x, too - but i never figured out exactly the correct way to like x, or to be interested in y.
now there is the divine feminine. this is the same rhetoric it has always been: women are biologically driven to like pink and ribbons and submitting to our husbands.
the problem is that the patriarchy found a better PR team. because yes, actually, i want every woman to have the choice to be a homemaker. i also want her taken seriously for her legitimate home-making labor. i want her to be recognized as also having a job, just unpaid. i want men to have this opportunity, too.
but it is no longer "i made this choice and I love it." instead it is a sixteen-paragraph rant about how selfish it is that my generation isn't having kids. instead it's long videos about how if you feed your children processed foods, you're going to kill them. instead it is "this is what womanhood is supposed to be. i feel bad for any other choices you're making."
the shame spiral is just prettier. it is large houses devoid of personality. it is the implication: if you don't have this, you aren't happy. the solid, everlasting assurance: women are actually supposed to be submitting. this is the default. this is the natural state of things. all other attempts inflict suffering.
but you can no longer say i'm not like other girls. you can no longer reject this image completely. you cannot find it revolting, even if you know that the underbelly is toxic and festering. sure, it is the same repackaged patriarchy. but the internet does not have shades of grey. you should support and reward other women! your disgust is actually internalized misogyny. not because you are seeing a vision of yourself the way they're trying to train you to be. not because you feel her ghost pass within an inch of your earlobe. not because your father will eventually ask you - why can't you be like her?
because they figured out how to make it beautiful: women will sell other women on this idea, and we will find the singular loophole in feminism. sure, she's shaming you in most of her videos. sure, she implies that a different life is obscene. but she just wants you to be happy! you'd be happier if you were listening!
and the whole time you're sitting there thinking: i'd actually just be happier if i had that kind of money.
#spilled ink#writeblr#warm up#this is an incredibly difficult idea to express#but i basically keep watching the same timelooped interaction:#someone makes tradwife content where she's like ''i think it's SO sad when ppl don't have kids EW''#and then the response is ''... go fuck yourself? i think ur life is miserable and bad ?"#and instead of being like ''oh we are all under capitalism huh''#the response is like ''you CANT say that. she made a CHOICE. she is ALLOWED to have KIDS and be HAPPY#unlike YOU who is UNHAPPY bc you don't have KIDS.''#like .... these are people who will throw the first stone. and then when you lob one back#they ask why you're so violent. they tell you that you're a bad activist.#and you're like. PARDON????? you implied being a woman meant i need to submit to my husband???#and they're like - well it's just my belief. so what if i'm invalidating your entire identity.
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🏹💘...!
#spuffy#btvs fanart#spike#spike btvs#buffy the vampire slayer#btvs#spike x buffy#my art#please don't repost#happy valentines day now time for me to disappear for 2 months#screaming at them : stop it#screenshot studies bc why not#proportions ? i don't know her#drawing these while listening to the patapon ost#buffy crying and being sad immediately after being brought back to life can yall please hear me out i have a vision#number one is i wanted to draw the fat ghibli tears#sarah michelle gellar#james marsters
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Quality bro time 🌱💅
#hello guys i am back with dreamworks trolls HCS WOOOOOOO#isnt life great#floyd moves in after band together#and hes very happy to have a subject he can scene-ify#this is the only person aside from poppy branch will let do something like this#he idolizes his older brother still!!#they remind me of me and my siblings fr#myart#fanart#trolls#trolls band together#floyd trolls#trolls branch#branch trolls
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being aromantic is like. hey btw you're going to live a life that is the culmination of most of society's worst nightmares. sorry lol ✌️ but then you turn around and take a really good hard look at it and it turns out that living in that nightmare is fucking awesome and you get to wake up every day and take that fear that other people have and laugh and hold it close until it's a great joy for you instead. and being happy is a radical act that you define instead of someone else. and you're sexy as fuck that's just a fact of life i don't make the rules on that one
#aromantic people are just sexy i'm not making the decisions here it's just facts#course ur hot as fuck. it came free with the aromanticism#being sexy is just default settings for aromantic people 👍#hope this all helps. anyway i'm on my 'i hope i die alone <3 i can't wait to die alone <3' kick rn#i think the existential fear that people have of Not Partnering specifically is so. well.#obviously that shit is strong and it is SO awesome to be free of it.#realizing you're aro and you don't Want a partner can be such a hit to the solar plexus#cause society says that's the only thing that'll make you happy. so either you go without that thing or you force yourself#into doing something you don't want which would make you unhappy anyway.#so you think it's a lose lose situation and you have to come to terms with what amatonormativity presents as the worst possible situation#but then! whoa! turns out personhood is inherently valuable in and of itself and romantic partnering is just a construct!#and that nightmare is now your life to do with as you please... define as you will... structure as you want...#best case scenario. is what i'm saying.#every day i wake up ready to spit all that amatonormative rhetoric back in life's teeth by being alone and being happy#and it's so fucking satisfying. every day.#fucking JUBILANT being by myself. and i love being a living breathing 'fuck you' to the romantic system#you need a partner to be happy? oh that's sooo fucking crazy guess i'll go be miserable then. in my perfect fucking dream life lmao#yeah obviously it's the worst possible outcome on earth to die without a partner. so terrible. can't wait for it :)#aromantic#aromanticism#aro positivity#aroace#arospec#sorry to bitches who are sad about not having a partner. i could not give a fuck though get better soon#you couldn't EVER pay me enough to go back to a mindset in which my inherent value wasn't enough by myself.#FUCK that shit. absolutely miserable and a bad life outlook in general. like genuinely do the work w/ amatonormativity and get better#life is something that can be so fulfilling whether someone wants to kiss you or whatever or not#i'm on antidepressants and i have people i care deeply about. what the fuck would i need a partner for lmao
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… and it all came flowing to his brain, three years of his youth. (ID in alt)
#jjk#jujutsu kaisen#gojo satoru#kenjaku#geto suguru#ruporas art#happy boxing day :partyexplosion: this is technically a redraw of an old piece i did!!#one of the top tier scenes of jjk - the tragedy was truly crazy i remember seeing this back then and had my whole life sucked into stsg#for a bit wraghhhgds it came back when s2 started airing but not for long... i knew i wanted to do a piece in celebration of the boxing tho#after this........i wonder if ill have the strength to do more jjk art... after that new chapter *puts my hands behind my back*#*staring longingly into the distance* but it was fun revisiting these scenes. im also queueing this before the ep airs#so im excited to see how devastating the effect will be in mappa's animation!!!
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With the end of season two comes a second redraw!
[Nov 2022] [June 2023] [June 2024]
#better drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#lan wangji#I was really looking forwards to this redraw - though the jump in skill isn't as dramatic as the last one I still am proud of my progress!#It's really incredible to look back on this last year and how much has happened since then.#Both in my personal life and this blog.#I started the second season while I was going through some pretty rough times and it truly kept my sanity afloat.#I challenged myself a lot more this year! And while it didn't always turn out the way I hoped-#-being messy and earnestly trying to do something different has been my favourite part of art.#There will always be a lot of room to grow - I don't think art and creativity has a ceiling.#I went from doubting that I was even an artist to joining a gamedev team as the lead artist! That's character growth!#Thank you all once again for joining me on this journey B*)#Thank you for all the messages and support you have sent my way these last 18 months.#I'm so happy to have been given the chance to create something for this community. You've given me so much and I am so grateful.#I'll take a little break to post some personal project stuff this week and resume season three after that!#Onwards to another season of silly (and sometimes serious) comics!
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"feels like we could go on for forever this way.." (x)
#wooo new header for me <33#also back to skk posting i missed them sm#wanted to pratice some scenery and try a new style which simplifies my current one and focuses more on colors and painting#and i'm super happy with how it turned out i think i won#for forever fits skk so well it rly brings back the bittersweet memories of when they were once partners and each others halves#and it just feels reminiscent of days gone by and they were once so close but time and life their own decisions have torn them apart#ben platt's voice is so pretty i love this song sm i heard it for the first time again in years and was slammed by all the emotions😭😭#i was so normal abt deh when it first came out i swear#bungou stray dogs#bungo stray dogs#bsd#dazai osamu#osamu dazai#nakahara chuuya#chuuya nakahara#soukoku#skk#lotus draws
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consumed with the urge to draw with ed holding cat. that's all
edit: metal arm wrong side bc canvas flip
#the legs look so fucked to me so cropped version first#edward elric#cat#I cannot explain#is it not self explanatory#probably bad to post this at 1 am my time but my impatience has always been strong and today is no different#fma#fma03#fullmetal alchemist#fmab#I really struggled with this and I still don't completely love it but I wanted to post something#it's been about a year since I first got BACK into fma#still into it lolol#fan art#anyway life updates... nothing really#I have been listening to hozier's new album for weeks and I saw him in concert which was awesome!#today I saw the PJO trailer and it brought me happiness#sketch#proportions are so fucked like I love edward's build but it really is hard for me to nail down#hope someone enjoys!
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The Wild Robot
My Response After Watching it
Y’all. I believe in humanity again if THAT is what people can create. What a story. WHAT. A. Story.
Please. Please. PLEASE. Take the time to watch it. It is BEYOND worth it.
#the wild robot#just being jayus#serendipity247#serendipitouslyjayus#I may have just discovered my new favorite movie#This is so good that I will buy a hoodie#Y’all don’t understand#I stimmed so hard at the movie theater I was shaking my seat#I skipped the entire way back to my car#faith in humanity restored#wild robot#I will watch this#Over#And#Again#Pedro Pascal was a serious mood#The story was delectable#The art was scrumptious#The humor high brow#The message heartwarming and forever life changing#I am so very very happy right now#I also saw a shooting star IN THE CITY#It’s a good day to be alive yall
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Wasted summers
#gravity falls#relativity falls#mabel pines#dipper pines#pines twins#my art#No piece of media has come back and consumed my life at a rate not even light could surpass#Gotta love a good au#i want to do a bunch of redraws with the relativity au because i have the power to do so :>#also happy october everyone!! and spooky month
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scene from where the apple falls by @jupiters-junipers :-) wholeheartedly recommend any and all of her work
#klance#voltron#vld#ok now time to freak it in the tags#to be honest i saw colleen blogging her read of New and the two of us went back and forth in dms for like 20 mins straight#abt all the things we like abt europas work#and i was like okay i have to assert my membership in the europa fan club too hang on#ive had 'draw europa report scene' in my art to-do file for months but thbeyre all so good#i couldnt choose!#due west is obviously The One the flagship#but they all deserve love....#i tell you to be honest im a coward i usually avoid any unfinished fics cause i like to binge but for europas work its simply worth it#anyway i envy you if you dont know who im talking abt bc that means u get to read her work for the first time...sighs dreamily#art#my art#ANYWAY THIS ONE IS SAD. EUROPA UNDERSCORE REPORT YOU ARE A TWISTED INDIVUDAL (affectionate)#im putting my life in ur hands with those happy ending tags.... save me help me..... auuughghh...
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something bad happened to you, and you died, and you came back wrong.
not wrong all the way. the little ways. you forget important dates, stopped going out with friends. it's harder to make you smile. you're apathetic towards things you used to love, afraid of places you used to go to cheer up. quieter. flinching. different.
you came back for love. you're still here for love. what pulled you back was a brightness so loud that even death couldn't outshout it. death heard the call and smiled at you and said okay. go home. somebody is waiting for you.
but you came back different. like lot's wife; you've turned into salt. you used to chirp through life in hops and skips; but now you lose skin just standing up. you have to move slower, skimming across this world without-touching-it. most things feel dull - until they're suddenly all-too-much. life, and being alive just rushes up and over you and you get hopelessly crushed.
you try to explain it to them: it is ugly, but this is what you are, now. the huge golden hoop of your halo now a little bronze ring. you are still watering your plants and wearing the same clothes. after all, you worked hard to come home. this life; so odd and off-color, now that you are wrong.
but they waited for you - it's just that they wanted the "you" that happened before this. the "you" that could sing in the show and hug people tight and look at a blade without breaking down to cry. the you with a smile in pictures. god, holyshit, it's like looking at a completely different person, isn't it. that other-you; the one they actually wanted.
you are the consolation prize. you are the body that forgot the ghost. you are the memory of the bad thing, and the death after; like you are wearing that memory as a banner. you are a fragment, an assembly. simulacrum. you don't make eye contact in mirrors, afraid the light will glance off and your true nature will flash back at you.
you hear them talk about it in their hushed, desperate whispers. sometimes they even admit it to your face; harsh and violent, acid thrown at christmas dinner. god, can you just fucking be normal again. you do not remember what normal is. you had to climb so far to get back here; you are far too exhausted. you want to open the glass door of your heart and show all the gears. can you help resolve whatever got messed up?
you try so, so hard. you came back for them. because you believed they would love you, even when you were so horribly broken. because you believed they would be patient. because you believed unconditional meant "without exception." you cannot do things the same way. you just get tired too quickly these days.
you want to put them on a couch and pour them the tea with hands that shake more than they remember. you want to line them up and draw them a map of where you have had to wander. you want to show every bruise in a backsplash; the little helpless ant of your soul carrying all that weight, over and over. you want to say: yes! it is different! but i did it for love!
you want to say: "i'm not the same, but i'm yours and i'm here. can that be enough?"
#this is very obviously about my battle with#ptsd#but i think it's also like a pretty apt metaphor for a lot of things like setting boundaries or going to therapy or choosing recovery#i was thinking about the 'comes back wrong' trope and i was like. oh no i have feelings about this bc i have mental illness#and once i stopped masking - i was WRONG. i was different#here's the good news: i am now INNUNDATED with love. fucking swimming in it. excelling at it. the people who stayed#learned my new self. my new different body and how i am different but i am trying. they have held me so tightly#and my life no longer feels quiet. it is not based in my suffering. it feels like i have been growing a tree in my chest#and now it is flowering.#it is so lovely to be surrounded by people who have said - oh! you cut off so many branches i was worried you weren't the same. but now...#... this is just a new you. and i love you. and i love that you're different and happy.#(but yeah also im nb so i was absolutely influenced by Trans things)
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I got a really tough question.
What’s your favorite Twst event of ALL TIME?
I like Harveston
this truly is the hardest question. :( but after much consideration, I think Endless Halloween Night wins out for me, because it's nonstop Characters Being Silly the whole way through. the whole thing is just lots of these little dorks having the most ridiculous interactions, which is always my favorite! and of course the big twist is SO delightfully stupid and doubles down SO hard that it becomes AMAZING and I 100% unironically adore it. AND it's Halloween! everyone is in their cute little costumes and having a spooky adventure! it's great!
however, I am ALSO a big fan of the Harveston event! how can I not be! everyone is wearing comfy winter outfits and getting along really weirdly well with Epel's grandma and he's getting a little worried about that! my terrible loud son sews a plush squirrel and then gives it a silly little nickname and refuses to leave it behind when it breaks! the ending shot with the sled! I LOVE IT.
obviously we need the best of both worlds now
#art#twisted wonderland#malleus in the background: RYUU } >:(#(this is an au where sebek wears his own halloween costume and isn't obsessively trying to match with malleus)#(unless malleus is also wearing a patchwork squirrel costume. hold on wait i should've drawn that instead)#my favorite is when people draw sebek's room and have risugurumi just hanging out on his desk or something#SHE GAVE HER LIFE FOR HIM#well she gave her leg or something anyway#it's been a while i forget#anyway endless halloween night also has my favorite cutscene#which is the five second long cutscene that is literally just floyd going OOH WHAT DOES THIS BUTTON DO and then a battle starts#thank you twst#i believe this is also when trey finds out that sebek's dad is a dentist and immediately makes it weird#while rook is just. dancing around and singing opera in the background.#'did...did he hit his head when we fell through the mirror?' 'no he's just like that'#i have to stop or i'm going to end up recounting the entire event#(sorry this took so long!) (i have been back in Deadline Hell)#(i didn't mean to actually answer this on halloween but it kind of worked out! HAPPY HALLOWEEEEEN)
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angel sunshine for an angel sunshine | for @huhfeatjhope
#bts#btsgif#dailybts#rékagif#hoseok#jung hoseok#bts hoseok#jhope#btsjhope#usersky#bebbi... it's your birthday but honestly i am the one who got a present with you.#a lot has happened lately but u stayed in my life even tho i would have understood if you'd have decided to leave#i don't know what i did to deserve this but i am so thankful#thank you for not giving up on me#you are a blessing for many people in their life#you are the best person i've ever known and what you mean to me cannot be expressed by words#i love you and i wish you nothing but all the happiness and sunshine and warmth and love in this world#happy that even tho we are both terrible at texting back we still keep in touch and i can call you a dear friend#happy happy happy birthday darling! may you always stay the sunshine that you are!
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even after settling down, theyre pretty cautious.....
.......it doesnt last long
#princess tutu#princess tutu spoilers#ahiru#fakir#fakiru#art tag#my anime straight couple ever. nobody is doing it like them#anyway i know theres not a lot of reasons to think the 'confessing love = disappearing' rule still applies post-canon#but ahiru being human again necessitates that there are still reality-warping powers at work#and it's because of drosselmeyer that she was ever human in the first place so i can see them being nervous about it#also this is an aside but i picture after fakir writes ahiru back into a girl they kinda have to flee gold crown town#to avoid fakir getting his hands chopped up by cultists and everything yknow#they settle down somewhere else in the german countryside with a little village nearby and have a simple life#ahiru keeps practicing ballet and fakir keeps writing and theyre happy :)
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