#happy birthday to my shit self

[ladyy--lazarus]

Mon, Nov 11 & Tue, Nov 12

[thepastelyakuza]

Mr. “I’ve been around a few times” 👀

[dreaming-hibi]

October Birthday: This one moment with you KHR Fanfic | Tsuna's Birthday - October 14th

⁍ Tags: KHR OCs, Tsuna Birthday Fic, Tsuna x Lucia ⁍ Featuring: Tsuna telling Reborn he sucks, Tsuna being a simp for Lucia (OC), me being very self-indulgent when writing this ⁍ Words: 2007 ⁍ Warning: for some reason this ended up being a fic about Tsuna turning 18, which I don't think is actually special but in my headcanon any Tsuna older than 19 is no longer being bossed by Reborn

Reborn gets to call all the shots on October 13th and 14th, because apparently both birthdays belong to him. Tsuna can never get a break, but I guess that's what Lucia is there for.

It was a wonderfully fine day. The sun was bright, its rays weren’t too hot nor was the shade they provided too cold, and the crispness of the air rustled and enriched the golden leaves dancing about. On this day, October was blooming. 

“I do understand the meaning behind joint birthdays, but—” Lucia heaved a sigh as she readjusted the rucksack weighing heavily on her shoulders; in hindsight, she shouldn’t have offered to carry her twin’s stuff too. “What’s the point of coming to the mountains?” 

The previously abandoned path, towered on both sides by thick and imposing trees of orange and red leaves, was bustling with the enthusiastic energy of their group — not one insignificant acquaintance had gone uninvited. Lucia wondered if the whole of Namimori town was there, and if they were there for want or for threat.

“Don’t ask me,” groaned Tsuna, carrying more backpacks than was humanly possible and, was that a hint of orange she could see in his eyes? 

“Because you had no say in this?” 

“Because I had no say in this.” 

Lucia could only laugh at that comment, but even her laughter was cut short as Tsuna gave a strangled scream and disappeared from her peripheral view. It took her less than a second to turn around, concerned he might have fallen victim to another pitfall — there were an awful lot of them for some reason. 

“Tsu—”

“What are you saying, Tsuna? This trip was your idea,” said Reborn, his unnecessarily bulky outfit hiding the brunet from view. The rough edges and gray of his costume closely resembled one of the rocks they had been running from earlier.

Lucia didn’t want to think about it, but the thought made itself known nonetheless, Did he disguise himself as a rock to chase us?

“I don’t think Tsuna can answer you... like that,” she gestured to the whole of them, feeling even more sorry for the brunet when Reborn jumped on him to get off. She crouched down, both hands extended to help him up, “Are you alright?”

“Physically? Could be better,” Tsuna answered, sitting up with as much dignity as someone who was now covered in dirt could manage — it wasn’t much, but it still was enough to make Lucia break into a smile. He took the handkerchief she offered to clean his face with a nod and added, “Mentally? I wanna kill him.” 

“Oh?” challenged Reborn, lips curling into a smirk. “I would like to see you try.”

“Demon.” 

“Loser.”

Lucia watched, awfully interested in how Tsuna thought he could possibly win an argument against the Reborn. She had known them, been welcomed into their midst and she had yet to see Tsuna win once against the child. She was unapologetically intrigued by this fool’s errand he had embarked on.

“Say tha—”

Unsurprisingly, as a known hitman of the underworld, with years of underhanded methods under his belt, Reborn won the argument by kicking Tsuna in the face. Mid-sentence. Without holding back.

You tried, Lucia put her hands together in prayer, hoping the kick didn’t cause a concoction. There wasn’t much she could do for the brunet, perhaps she could compliment him later for his daredevil attitude. 

“Everyone is waiting, let’s go!” and off he went, a trail of destruction and death in his wake. Reborn, elementary school kid appearance or not, was not a person to be trifled with. 

Lucia watched as the rest of them welcomed him, chatting cheerfully or even congratulating him on his birthday. She could understand how his attitude might be seen as charming or even cute, however, such skills could only be applied to people who were ignorant of the devil’s true nature. Although she wouldn’t go as far as calling herself Mister Wise Guy, she was confident she wouldn’t have fallen prey to Reborn’s charms anyhow, for she had found something far more charming than pretense. 

“Here, let me help you,” she said, taking some of the bags Tsuna was carrying off his hands. He had shown off his superhuman-mode for long enough, it was time he returned to his everyday-Tsuna-mode. 

Tsuna nodded in thanks, but something about his crestfallen face pulled at Lucia’s heartstrings. She could tell he was worrying about something, and it was something he didn’t want to talk with her about, but she wouldn’t be his girlfriend if she didn’t know how to pull such information from him. 

“Hey—” Lucia felt affection and appreciation warm her heart when his eyes focused on her, she only had to say one word for him to make her the center of his world; she felt seen and loved. “—you know, someone once told me it’s okay to need help.” 

“Yeah.” Tsuna scratched the back of his head in embarrassment, recognizing that she was throwing his own words back at him. Just as he had taken her hand and helped her through her darkest moments, Lucia wanted to do the same for him; both the easy and the hard, she wanted the two of them to see through life together.

“Do you want to talk about it?” 

“I did, have a trip in mind,” he admitted after a minute of silence, a weight seemed to lift off his shoulders as he picked himself up and walked by her side. “But in my fantasy, it was only the two of us.”

“Oh?” Lucia said, patting herself in the back for sounding so well put together despite feeling her heart beating right out of her chest. Her cheeks, bright red, could be compared to the radiance of the sun. “And where did we go, only the two of us?” 

Tsuna huffed, she could tell he was more embarrassed than annoyed by the question, “A planetarium.” 

“A... what?” Lucia had no problem holding conversations in Japanese these days, though, apparently, there were still words she didn’t know of. “I’m sorry, can you say it again? I’ll pay more attention!” 

“Planetarium, un planetario, a place where you can see stars,” he helped her along, his cheeks reddening. Lucia couldn’t fathom what there was to be embarrassed about, until he continued, “You said you wanted to go on one of those manga dates, so I thought...”

This time, instead of her heart, it was her feet that tripped over each other, causing her to stumble right into Tsuna. From this distance—there was none—she could feel his heart beating a fast rhythm, much like her own was doing. 

“It’s your birthday, you should do something you enjoy,” she whispered, wanting to keep this one moment between them. 

“I... enjoy seeing you smile.”

“You’re so stupid, Tsunayoshi.”

There was something exceedingly schoolish about camping in the woods and eating around a campfire, or at least, it certainly felt that way to Tsuna. How many times would anyone, in their daily life, have the time to hike a mountain and hold a birthday celebration like this? Statistically speaking, he wasn’t sure the number could exceed the hundreds. 

Even if his calculations were wrong—which definitely were—Tsuna highly doubted there was anyone, nowadays, who went camping and actually bothered drawing lots for lookout duty. And no, this wasn’t just because he lost six times in a row.  

Tsuna sighed, this was totally because he lost six times in a row. He didn’t bother looking up at the sound of footsteps, this he could accurately give out a name for. 

“You don’t have to keep me company, Lucia,” he said, failing miserably at not sounding like a sullen child who had lost at their favorite game. “I lost fair and square.”

“I wouldn’t call drawing lots with mafiosi fair, they never miss a chance to cheat their way through something.”

“Should have known.” 

“And I’m sure Reborn cheated but... He cheated by making you lose.”

It certainly worked in making Tsuna feel better about himself, after all, he should have expected such behavior from Reborn. Tutor or not, Reborn wasn’t satisfied until he made Tsuna suffer in one way or another, it was to keep him “humble” or so he said. 

“Actually,” Lucia started, drawing closer to him. Tsuna didn’t let such a gesture agitate him, he knew she wasn’t used to the chill of autumn, he could be totally cool about his girlfriend plastering herself to his side. Yup, he could totally do that. “I was hoping you would, you know, lose.”

“...What?”

“Not like that.”

“Is there any other way?”

“Yes.”

Tsuna had to raise an eyebrow at her, what other way was there to interpret her words? The lots were for the lookout duty and she wanted him to lose, therefore she wanted him to be on duty, what else was there to say? Sometimes, he truly and really couldn’t understand what went on in his girlfriend’s head.

“Stop looking at me like that!” laughed Lucia, standing up. She offered him a hand and, really, he shouldn’t be following her after she wounded his feelings like that but, follow he would — because he was that much of a loser for her, apparently.

“Your explanation better be good,” he said, lacing their hands together. It was at times like this that Tsuna realized how much of a simp he was. His heart was soaring with joy from the simple act of holding her hand. 

“Let’s hope it is!”

Their walk through the forest was silent and uneventful — save for Tsuna almost bringing the two of them down when he tripped over a log. It was around when Tsuna started to feel the burning need to ask where they were going that the sea of trees parted before them, leading into a cliff. 

“Why—”

Thousands of stars filled every corner of the dark sky, each shining just as brightly as the sun, if not more. Tsuna gasped as one of those stars began a fast descent, creating a single trail of ethereal blue that lasted but a few seconds. He looked to Lucia, his thoughts going to her even as the night sky begged for his attention. 

He found her already looking at him, her eyes reflecting some of the twinkling lights of the stars in ways he only thought were possible for manga characters. Was it real? Or was this simply a by-product of his feelings for her?  Under the eternal light of the stars, his jumbled thoughts and erratic heart seemed to hold little significance. 

“Is this...” Tsuna started but fumbled partway through, what was one supposed to say in the face of such a surprise? 

“It might not be the planetarium you thought of, but this feels just as special to me.” 

And how could Tsuna not love her in the face of that? He had dreamt up this whole fantasy of the two of them going on this fantastic date, only to have Reborn ruin the whole experience for him by organizing a camping trip to the most remote of mountains known to Japan and now his girlfriend was bringing that fantasy back, because she had seen how much it meant to him. Sure, he had had fun with his friends today, and would do the same on his birthday tomorrow, but some of that happiness had nothing on the dizzying sensation he felt whenever he was the cause for Lucia’s smile. 

“As long as you’re happy.”

“It’s your birthday, Tsunayoshi, you’re supposed to be the one getting spoiled.”

Tsuna laughed at that, something about her being angry at his silliness making her all the more endearing in his eyes. “I think I am.”

“Really?” 

“Really.”

Lucia grinned, her hands coming up to cradle his face as if he was something precious, something beloved. The chill he had felt until moments ago melted under the fiery touch of her fingers, “Happy birthday, Tsuna.” And thus she bestowed a noisy kiss on his nose, as though he were a frog prince in need of saving. Tsuna chuckled, he truly and really couldn’t understand what went on in his girlfriend’s head, and he was happy to keep it that way.

[justghostthings]

My partner 💞💞💞💞💞💞🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

[awkwardlyaaron]

The growing list of what I've learned on the violin

Ode to joy

Happy birthday

Mary had a little lamb

Scarborough fair

We wish you a merry christmas

My Bonnie lies over the ocean

Oh Susana

[cosmicloved]

happy tomo day to all who observe *is the sole observant*

[mr-selfdestruct]

I removed myself from a toxic situation everyone clap

[nyandereneko]

Last Sunset

Word Count: 1,769

Summary: “It’s the last sunset of the year,” the woman wreathed in starlight noted as she rested her chin on her hands. “It’s truly stunning, isn’t it?”

Author’s Note: Happy last day of 2022, I can’t wait to kiss this year goodbye! More important than that, happy birthday to my wonderful amazing love Zhongli!!! I can’t believe this is the 3rd year in a row we’re celebrating his bday together, I guess I should narrow down anniversary stuff if he’s gonna be sticking around this long 🥺🥺 I could go on a long rant about the rollercoaster that was this year and everything Zhongli means to me but I’ll let the fic and everything I post going forward speak for itself. This year is going to be a good year, no matter what, and with Zhongli by my side I know it’s not impossible 💕 thank you for reading and I hope you enjoy!

Reblogs Appreciated!!

*****

The sun set over the vermillion harbor, ushering in the twilight with open arms and eager eyes. Its light was snuffed out as a delicate bell might extinguish a flickering candle, an analogy that suited the region known for its deep chasms and towering cliffs of ore just fine. It was a land rich in valuable resources and traditions that’d managed to beat the odds and stake their claim as enduring staples of Liyue’s history and culture. Nova never tired of hearing Zhongli discuss the various things she had yet to learn about his home, and even some things she already had. Concepts and thoughts and memories that’d been forcibly ripped away from her, lost as a result of the Fatui’s meddling and the unforgiving flow of time and its penchant for deteriorating anything left in its wake.

Where the latter influence was concerned, it wasn’t anything personal, of course. That’s just the nature of time, of a constantly evolving and progressing world.

The former Archon and his wife had gotten themselves settled at a corner table on the front patio of Third Round Knockout—one of the harbor’s premier eateries that enjoyed a distinguished and unique reputation;  it’d more than earned it over the years. Locals and tourists alike were sure to find something to whet their appetites at the humble Chihu Rock landmark, and the visiting duo was no exception. Zhongli especially, considering he’d been frequenting this establishment practically from the moment of its founding, and its reliable and expertly crafted menu had yet to be usurped as his top pick out of everything the harbor had to offer.

Even the lavish luxuries of Xinyue Kiosk and Liuli Pavilion had failed to earn his devoted patronage.

“It’s the last sunset of the year,” the woman wreathed in starlight noted as she rested her chin on her hands. Her feline ears twitched and flicked in response to the constant cacophony that crowded the air as her tail absently swept the ground behind her. She rolled her head to one side as she admired the way the evening’s fading glow made the white caps glisten like stars in a sea of night. “It’s truly stunning, isn’t it?”

A pinch at the tip of her ear got her attention, and she snapped her head around in a flash. The fingers that tangled in her wavy locks coaxed her face closer to their operator, securing her focus on his dazzlingly handsome features. “It’s difficult to admire anything else when I’ve got such an unrivaled beauty by my side.”

He moved in to seal his outrageously embarrassing remark with an earnest kiss, but Nova spluttered and coughed and shoved him back a few inches. Face stoked like a furnace and heart beating with the vigor of a raging fire, she swallowed involuntarily and struggled to calm her nerves as Zhongli’s amber stare likewise swallowed her like a crashing wave. Her dark eyes fluttered shut as she allowed the soothing, tingling sensation to wash over her, drowning her in its frothing depths the same way it always did when he so much as breathed in her direction. Her fur was still standing on end, but it wasn’t like this was the first time they’d ever done something like this…far from it, if they were both being honest. And it certainly wouldn’t be the last exchange of its kind that they shared. 

So why didn’t it ever seem to get any easier for her to stomach his magnificence, for her to not pale in comparison to his brilliance and radiance like a shadow seared away by the sun?

Nova was hopelessly smitten with him, wooed and awed by her husband’s charms, his charisma, the very nature of his alluring aura and enchanting presence. He may have been quick to dismiss her arguably overblown perception of him, but it was a perspective he and anyone else would be lucky to rip from her cold, dead hands. Zhongli counted his wife’s devoted affection and appreciation as a blessing every day since she’d crashed into his life like a falling star, drifting perfectly into place to fill the void in the open arms that awaited her so eagerly, intent to never release her from their desperate grasp.

“I’m sorry, I just can’t help myself,” his lips whispered as they traced the edge of her ear, redoubling the bristling of her fur as his enticing tone shot bolts of lightning through her veins. 

“Well, it is your birthday, so I suppose you can do what you want,” the flustered girl replied, a little out of breath as her strained voice and tense nerves only made it harder to maintain her grip on the fraying tether of her composure. 

“Oh, really?” he teased with an unmistakably amused chuckle. “You’re willing to give me free rein to do whatever I want?”

A sharp gasp escaped her lips as his found her throat, trailing down one side with an onslaught of dizzying kisses that left her vision swimming. She briefly wondered if she really was just going to pass out here and now, but she certainly didn’t want to. She didn’t want anything to ruin his annual birthday celebration, especially nothing that could be considered her fault. At the same time, she couldn’t help feeling a little guilty and lackluster about the mundane nature of the celebration she’d planned.

“To a point, yes, of course you can do whatever you want,” Nova answered firmly, making sure he met her gaze and processed what she was saying before she continued. “I just…I just want to make sure you really are doing what you want, you know?”

Zhongli caressed her cheek as she averted her eyes, giving her wandering gaze some time to drift back to him before he responded. “And what gives you the impression that I’m not?”

“Nothing specific, I guess,” she answered as she swirled the colorful drink in her glass, opting to watch its weak current slosh against the rim rather than face her companion directly. “I just know it’s been hard, for like 500 years and counting. It was hard before that, but it’s been even harder since. And I just…I don’t want to be dull, a disappointment. I don’t want to be tedious or a bore. I don’t want to come back into your life only to make you regret me coming back. On top of that, I feel like…a lot of the time it feels like you’re just too larger than life to make or get surprises and gifts for, and I know that’s my own fault. I just don’t want to drag you down, love, I want to be an interesting and engaging and worthy partner for you, the Archon of Geo, the god of Liyue! Even as a nobody that happened to transcend my mortality, it’s hard to imagine I could ever measure up to someone as remarkable as you. It’s even harder to imagine I could ever make someone as amazing as you happy, especially because—”

Zhongli abruptly ended her dejected speech with a breath stealing kiss, seizing her face as the tips of his fingers grazed her hairline, caressing her as if he was touching the most delicate, cherished thing in the world. Their warm, familiar lips molded together as if they were two parts of a single whole. At this point, maybe they pretty much were. Even after all the years of suffering and separation, there still wasn’t a single soul in the entirety of Teyvat that either party yearned for more than the other. Bound together by an immutable bond and a voluntary contract of sorts, even if they got stranded on opposite ends of the universe, they were certain they’d find a way to close the gap and return to the place, the person, where they rightfully belonged. 

The Archon’s gilded gaze coated the object of his affection in gold leaf as he adjusted his hold, one hand shifting to encompass more of her face as he caressed her like a precious gem, an invaluable treasure. His other hand found her knee, fingers tensing on the curve of her leg just below the hem of her skirt before they started to creep upwards towards said fabric; ever so carefully, ever so precisely. Nova slapped her hand over his wandering touch, digging into his wrist with her gloved grasp as her head filled with a distracting, all encompassing haze.

She was a hapless yet fortunate victim of his subtle, insistent, expertly orchestrated ministrations.

“The greatest gift I will ever receive in my lifetime is you, kitten,” Zhongli confessed, clutching the hand that’d grabbed him in order to raise the back of her glove to his lips. “That means all the more now that I know what it’s like to live without you, to live despite believing you were lost to me forever. So, when a day like today comes along, I’m not very particular about what we do, as long as we do it together. Sipping tea with you, reading books with you, watching plays with you, even just sitting next to you, existing next to you…that’s more than satisfying enough. And I don’t want you to waste your worries on any inconsequential or unfounded doubts or concerns going forward. Do you think you could do that for me?”

“If you’re that serious about it, why don’t we make a contract?” Nova suggested with a purr, flipping his hand over to leave a kiss of her own on both the ring and the gem that decorated his gloves.

“What terms did you have in mind?” he crooned as his voice dropped, the kind of deep, rich tone that vibrated in his throat and denoted just how little time she had to convince him of her ploy before he made a move of his own.

Of course, it wasn’t as if Nova was averse to participating in whatever activity he had in mind. On the contrary, she was probably more eager than he was. And that made the chase that much more thrilling. She rose from her seat with an impish smirk, keeping her hold on him as her tail thrashed with an excitement that betrayed the true extent of her interest. “I suppose we could discuss it over tea, if you’re in the mood to turn in for the evening.”

With her next breath he was on his feet, squeezing her hand with a strength that communicated the depth of his longing and subsequently made her heart want to erupt at the mere thought of it. “I thought you’d never ask.”

[hangryyeena]

:)

[doggirlbuck]

my family is throwing me a surprise party tomorrow and not only do i have to think about how i will act surprised because only a couple of them know i know about it but also im not entirely sure how thats going to go considering its at my house and i will be there the whole day but im sure it will be great regardless

[bigwishes]

Embarrassed?

Tom sat there staring down at his phone, typing like his life depended on it.

"if this is true I will literally trade anything to get bigger, you can make me a dumb jock, make my dick small, Ill even take being a walking joke, you can take anything you like so long as I can get huge!"

He had stumbled upon a site called "give'n'take" which was claiming that it would allow him to trade something he currently has for something he wanted. He had seen claims from guys claiming to of turned into their dream self over night by giving up something that they never really liked about themselves anyway.

But it was Hard for Tom to pick something he wanted to give up, he had almost won the genetic lottery in his eyes. A fat nine inches down stairs, 6.5ft tall, a good amount of body hair, not enough to be annoying but enough to drive guys wild. Everything had made him a walking stud that oozed confidence with every step. All but one thing that is. Tom had loved bodybuilding ever since he could remember, he loved the look of huge guys and he loved the idea of being one, but on his 23rd birthday he looked in the mirror and saw after years of work he looked nothing like a bodybuilder. sure he had some size but there was no real mass. He just looked like a guy who played sport on the weekend. He wanted to be so much bigger. He got hard imagining himself being the guy who had to turn sideways to get through a door or who rocked up to a house party in gym shorts and an XXL stringer tank top that clung to him like it was about to snap. Unfortunately his height was against him, his long muscle fibers took ages to develop and when they did it was so evenly spread out it didn't look like he had done anything at all.

He'd do anything to be bigger, he'd be happy with anything taken away so long as he was huge. So he left the choice up to the people behind the screen.

---

The next morning Tom woke up and instantly felt strange, he felt off balance some how like his body had gone up 30 pounds over night and when he got up and looked in the mirror he realised...it had.

"HOLY SHIT" Tom yelled out into his empty apartment.

His body had beefed up and become more defined without any more work. He couldn't worship himself for long though as he instantly began investigating to see what had been taken, but it didn't appear like anything was missing at all.

He was still packing, he hadn't shrunk in fact he might of even gained an inch or two and he didn't have any issues remembering anything from his engineering degree or any day to day stuff. The thought crossed his mind that maybe they had forgotten to take something, or maybe because he wanted to be big so badly they cut him a break.

Tom's worries melted away as he smiled and flexed his newly enhanced biceps.

"mmm, not as huge as I was hoping for but I'll keep working on it"

Tom picked up his gym bag and decided to head out to see what his new size could do, and to stick to the habit, he didn't want all this new size to make him forget to work out and end up losing it all in a few months.

Tom arrived at the gym and changed into his workout gear but he looked and felt different was he...bigger? nah, he thought to himself, its just him getting used to being this big although as he stared at his new size in his reflection a new thought entered his mind.

"Maybe this tank top is too tight...I probably shouldn't be such a show off and buy some looser clothes to cover up"

He shook his head and decided to think about it when he got home, right now he just wanted to see how strong he had gotten.

As Tom worked out something weird was happening, he knew how to exhaust his muscle, he new how to overload the weight and really make it feel like work but as he added weight with each set it felt just as easy as the last.

He'd occasionally see his reflection in the mirror wall and he looked like he was getting even bigger, and his tank top felt even tighter than before. Surely it was just the pump he thought to himself as he continued to lift and push his body.

He sat down at the cable row and put the pin almost at the bottom of all the plates, surely this would be a struggle for him. Tom leant back and pulled when suddenly.

Cutcshhhhhhh!

the sound of ripping fabric rung out in his ear as he felt the shoulder strap snap and felt the fabric split across his back.

"aw shit" Tom said as he stood up and took of his shirt.

Immediately he saw his reflection in the mirror, he looked huge. His muscles bulging he couldn't help but pull his gym shorts up and flex, this is what he wanted to be an absolute tank...

but, everyone probably thought he was a dickhead flexing outside of the changing room, he thought to himself. He started to wonder if he was that guy now, the guy who'd workout shirtless and annoy everyone in the gym.

He noticed a few dudes looking at him like they were waiting to get on the machine. His face turned a slight pink on his cheeks and he was flushed with embarrassment.

"oh s-sorry" Tom stuttered as he quickly tried to move out the way

Originally he thought he'd just move on to the next exercise but he realised he was shirtless and bolted for the changing room. Once inside he gazed at his reflection again.

"maybe...I shoulda asked to be just a little smaller, fuck now I gotta walk outta here shirtless"

Tom couldn't get a grip and didn't no what had come over him. He had never felt a shred of embarrassment in his life but now he was worried what people would think about him being shirtless in the gym.

The changing room was empty and Tom took the time for a few more poses before he was gonna make a run for the exit. He flexed his arms as hard as he could and felt the blood rushing into the muscle, but it was strange, the muscle wasn't just pumped up, it was like it was still pumping up. He tilted his head and watch in the mirror, slowly but surely his shoulders and arms were expanding, his chest was filling with mass and size. He saw his already huge legs slowly expanding out into colossal pillars as they stretched his shorts. He could hear the fabric starting to strain and quickly bend down to get his gym bag.

The moment he leant over he heard the changing room echo with a large tearing sound as he felt the tightness relieve across his ass. Tom's face turned bright red as he quickly reaches around to make sure it was just the shorts he had split and not his underwear.

He let out a sigh of relief as he felt his underwear was still in tact, he stood up and took a step hearing has his massive thighs tore and split his shorts with just one step. He was almost at the door when he saw his hulking figure in the mirror.

He stood frozen admiring his huge body, he flexed his entire body at once loving how huge he had become, he noticed his underwear was straining and the fabric was starting to become see through and then he remembered....he had to walk through the gym like this to get out....

A wave of embarrassment washed over him, everyone was gonna be staring at him

Tom quickly grabbed his bag and made a break for it through the busy gym. He had hoped to run but his body was so big that was almost an impossible task, so jogging was next but even just a slight jog left him out of breath and gasping for air. By the time he reached the door he had multiple people staring at him confused as he was huffing and puffing like he had just run a marathon.

He swung open the door to the gym and bumped between two guys that were on their way in. Tom tried to apologise but the only noises that came out were him gasping for air and trying to catch his breath. He flashed a quick apology wave as he climbed into his car which was luckily parked right in front of the entrance.

Tom looked down trying to slow his breathing and catch his breath when he noticed his huge hard on. His dick was like steel, the thought of everyone staring at him....judging him....

Tom started his car trying to ignore it but he heard the two guys he had just bumped into talking, muffled by his window.

"bro did you see that guy, there is just a thing as too big"

Hearing those worse Tom felt a swirl of shame and embarrassment swell in his stomach and work its way to his pelvis as he started taking deep and slow breaths.

"I know right dude, and the way he was so out of breath just walking through the gym, and working out in his underwear? what a loser"

the two men walking into the gym laughing as the door shut behind them

The words echoed in Tom's ears, he couldn't help it, he gripped his steering wheel so tight he thought he was going to break it, he bit his lip and closed his eyes as his dick began to twitch and erupt. Tom let out a pathetic moan as he looked down to see not just his underwear soaked but his car seat and thighs caked in cum.

Tom looked into his rear view mirror, his head, traps and shoulders completely blocking the view, his face was flush as he felt more embarrassed than ever before in his life, He started his car and quickly reversed out.

"god...I'm such..."

His dick instantly got hard again.

"fuck, I'm so big....I'm...too big"

Tom started panting as he drove out of the parking lot.

"I'm a fucking big, freakish, loserrrr--eerruuuuughh!!"

Tom couldn't help unload himself into his underwear and over his car seat thinking about how pathetic he was...

Well...he did say he was happy for them to take anything, His confidence seemed like a fair price.

[httpsserene]

𝐡𝐨𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐲 | 𝐨𝐩. 𝟖𝟏

summary: you accidentally leak a private song you made as a birthday gift for your boyfriend.

content warning: mdni. suggestive and sexual themes. humor. i consider this to be crack taken seriously. menace and unbothered king oscar piastri. a couple uses of yn. one threat/suggestion of self-deleting (in minecraft ofc). song referenced is on the way by jhene aiko ft. mila j. 

pairing: oscar piastri x singer! fem!black!reader

genre: smau.

from, serene: was this requested? no. i did this for myself. do what you will with that information. enjoy, loves !!!!

⌕ join taglist | feedback & requests | upcoming chapters | table of contents ↻

imessage • yn -> oscar

yn’s soundcloud

twitter

imessage • oscar -> yn

twitter

twitter • oscar & yn

instagram • oscarpiastri • april 6th

liked by 2,341,988 others

oscarpiastri everybody knows what's on my plate for my birthday breakfast, lunch, dinner, and dessert 😋🍽️

view comments

yninsta: gave you permission to post this and you didn't even tag me 😠

➥ oscarpiastri: tagging you is unnecessary. ➥ oscarpiastri: as you already made a whole song about how much you enjoy our..."activities" and posted it for public consumption :) ➥ yninsta: please deactivate your account 🫡

landonorris: mate just block me out of respect 🫠

➥ oscarpiastri: you see, i already respect you very little🫶��� ➥ landonorris: "tell your friends tinker bell fucked your brains out" ➥ landonorris: i vow to never let you have a peaceful day ever again 🫶🏻

charlesleclerc: my son, please. i have learned too many things i did not need to know about you in 3:42 song. have mercy 🤧

➥ oscarpiastri: somebody has to be the family disappointment 🤷‍♂️ ➥ olliebearman: it's me. i'm the one driving a haas next year 😖 ➥ leoleclerc: everybody's knows m not bringing the shame to our family's name :) 🐕🐾 ➥ alexandrasaintmleux: nobody is a disappointment! family dinner is postponed this month btw. i think charles might cry if he has to look at you oscar.

logansargeant: dude wtf 😳

➥ oscarpiastri: do you have something to say? ➥ logansargeant: ....no ➥ oscarpiastri: hm. that's what i thought

user1: oscar posting "for your eyes only" pics i can't believe it

➥ user2: we all know the song is dirtier than the pics

user3: it's always the quiet ones 🙂‍↕️

➥ yninsta: stay away from them they only cause headaches 😒 ➥ user4: don't you mean backaches? from the way he blows your back out CONSISTENTLY ➥ yninsta: i hope you know that i'm having you blacklisted from any of my future live shows and tours @/user4

user5: everybody tell him happy birthday 🫵🏻

➥ user6: ion have to tell him SHIT 👹 ➥ user7: he already got her, i'm not wishing him a hbd ➥ user8: i'm not spoiling him, she got it covered 🥱 ➥ user9: y'all r lonely n miserable HBD OSCARRRRR!!!!

mclaren: oscar, i respect your game—but i think you missed the point of the emergency pr meeting that i was forced to be in earlier - admin

➥ oscarpiastri: yolo - kimi raikkonen ➥ mclaren: valid ig

general taglist (ask to join):

@saintslewis/@cherry2stems/@lorarri/@mindless-rock/@biancathecool

@barnestatic/@darleneslane/@lovingaphroditesworld/@smoothopz/@vetteltea

@tallrock35/@spideybv28/@loomiscorpse/@hiireadstuff/@namgification

@gg-trini/@multi-fandom-rando/@landoslutmeout/@love-simon/@iloveyou3000morgan/

@rexit-mo/@oscahpastry/@sweatrevenge5436-blog/@bokutos-babyowl/@oliviah-25

@evermoreandroyalblue/@riveristhebest1/@xylinasdiary/@ashiekins/@flowergirl1134

@hearts4robs/@c-losur3/@bloodyymaryyy/@awritingtree/@lammys-thinking

© httpsserene 2024 - photos used from pinterest.

[mackjlee9]

* when's yer day of birth, i need a deadline 🤨

Uh...

Next Saturday~ so you have a week, but again~! You don't have to draw me anything, sweetie 😭

[vampiresbloodx]

Based on this post!.

Your beloved Natasha.

avenger!gf!Natasha Romanoff! x civilian!cafe!owner!reader.

Trigger warnings: some negative self talk, mental health issues mentioned, slight homophobia, nevertheless, a sweetness overload off fluff.

Natasha Romanoff, the romantic she ever is at heart, who wouldn't show that to anyone but you and you only. Her beloved. Her light. Her everything.

Surprises you a visit at your work, you've already complained to her jokingly that your co workers are all gossiping about the one and only avenger the famous black widow coming to the cafe just to see you and flirt with you constantly, that they are suspecting more between the two of you and you can't hide forever. Nat likes it though and loves to tease you about it.

She understands where you're coming from though. She hears your worries and concerns, Nat will happily sit there and listen to you talk about everything and anything for hours upon hours, holding you close, reassuring you as many times as she can to bring ease to you. But she gets it. She knows when you're actually serious and want to discuss important stuff with her, she will be by your side regardless, and make sure not to let anything bad happen to her beloved.

(this girl will straight up kill for you.)

As she comes into your work, with a bright, cocky smile, seeing you immediately at the counter with a raised eyebrow at her as if you don't look happy to see her, which you definitely are. Your cheeks burn as customers look at her, even though she doesn't go on press a lot or talk as much to the public as captain America does, she's still pretty well known. The kids especially know her and love her, even the elders are fond of your Natasha, and you find that incredibly sweet as you know she has those thoughts that get to her in the dark of night when it's her brain being mean to her, telling her that everyone would be fine without her here. And you're always there to kiss those mean thoughts away, making sure she knows how loved and safe she is.

As she greets you with a kiss, doesn't care who's watching, she smiles at you.

"I have a surprise for you when you come home tonight" she suggests with a small smirk.

God you're already flustered mess already, as you try to gather your words to speak.

"what's the occasion? I would have known if it's your birthday or a gala or our anniversary."

She shakes her head with a soft look on her face.

"none of those, don't worry моя любовь." She mutters sweetly, wanting to kiss you more as her eyes go down to your lips.

She's really not subtle, is she?.

Sadly, the moment is ended quicker than you both had hoped as a customer interrupts you two.

"uh sorry, can I get my order?" He asked, clearly looking uncomfortable.

Natasha fought the urge to roll her eyes, so did you.

You nodded at her, as she knew what you meant and walked away after sending you a wink.

Your cheeks burned hotter than the sun.

"yes, hi, what can I get you?."

-

You weren't too shocked to see Natasha waiting for you, already at the front door as she heard you coming from a mile away (you're not sure how she knows, but you appreciate it) and immediately you're greeted with her lips.

"hmf! Hi!" You mumbled through the kiss as you laughed, placing your hands on her hips.

Her hands traveled up your body, practically groping you as she grabbed at your ass from behind, causing you to let out a squeal.

"baby" you whined.

"sorry, can't help myself when you look that good."

"I smell like shit" you pouted.

"still I'd eat you" she said proudly, walking away as your eyes widened at her.

You shake your head, letting out a chuckle as you chase after her.

But before you could fully see what was happening, she covered your eyes with her hands.

"don't peak, sweetheart" she murmured, her voice sending a chill down your spine.

You bit down on your lip, humming as she lead you through your home.

She ended up making you sit down on what you assumed was a chair, maybe the dining table? Who knows. You were so tempted to open your eyes, just to disobey her, play with her, but you knew something about tonight felt special, yet every night and day with her was special.

It was never a dull moment.

"open."

You hear her say, you happily do so.

The first thing you saw was red roses. Which, you liked the romantic gesture from her, but then you saw more and more flowers all piled neatly into a bouquet. It was beautiful. Of course, Nat would wait all day for you just to treat you to something sweet like this. It was worth it.

Your eyes started to well up with tears.

"honey? Are you okay?-" she immediately got up, worried look on her pretty face as you fought back the urge to cry.

"I'm fine I'm fine, I just. No one has ever done this to me before. I'm just. Overwhelmed. Not in a bad way, it's a good overwhelming feeling" you choked back a sob, looking into her eyes. "God I love you so much."

She smiles, pressing her lips to yours and pulling you in closer.

"I love you more than anything."

-

Later during the night, as you're wrapped up in a warm blanket, covering you and Natasha as her arms were over your shoulder, and you felt warm and happy inside, you couldn't even focus on the movie, only just her, and the bouquet of flowers that were placed on the dining table, where they'd get plenty of sun.

"I'm curious of what the type of flowers you choose mean" you randomly asked her.

"hmm? Oh, well, I didn't really think all that through -" she said, looking embarrassed as she scratched the back of her neck shyly, you chuckled, kissing her cheek.

"I still love it, it's just interesting what you picked. Even if you didn't mean to, it means a lot to me, I absolutely love it."

She blushes.

[lizzy06]

Takami Keigo(Hawks) x Reader Fic Recs!! (Tumblr/Ao3/Wattpad)

My Hero Academia Fic Rec Masterlist

lay low (take it slow) ✨by @andypantsx3/andypantsx3(college student! reader, hurt/comfort, fluff, eventual smut) What even was the right google search for this situation? How do I sew someone back together without passing out? How do I not barf on the pro hero I’m stitching up? Or, Hawks’ game of double agent lands him in the shaky hands of one (1) very unequipped English major.[COMPLETED]

Falling for You ✨by @flannel-cladpika (oneshot, soulmate au, fluff)Every year, on your birthdays, you two will switch quirks.[COMPLETED]

Golden ✨by @meganshinsou-tm (oneshot, soulmate au, fluff) When you touch yoursoulmate for the first time a thin gold line with be etched around your wrists.

Soul Chicken by @hitsuackerman (oneshot, soulmate au, fluff) Soulmate AU where the first words your soulmate says to you are written on your wrist and while Hawks has an absolutely unhelpful phrase written on them, y/n has something….unique.

Bird Hunting | Pt.2:Bird's Nest✨ by @a-n-conrad (oneshot, soulmate au)In a world where your soulmate was found through a symbol appearing on your left forearm, hinting at the quirk of your soulmate, you had to admit that you were lucky. You already knew who your soulmate was. The only issue was that there was really no way for you, an ordinary person, to get anywhere near the number 2 hero.

Petals and Feather✨ by @a-n-conrad(oneshot, hanahaki au, angst with happy ending) You’ve finally gotten a job as a sidekick after graduating from UA about a year before. But after working with Hawks for a few months it starts to get a bit hard to breathe. How are you supposed to fix a case of Hanahaki disease when you happened to fall in love with the most emotionally unavailable hero alive? [COMPLETED]

BNHA Soulmate AU Week Day 4: Save Your Soul by @writing-freak (oneshot, soulmate au, fluff)part of soulmate au week; everyone has colorful marks on their skin where their soulmate touches them for the first time. you’re determined to hide your soulmarks: a pair of hands on your waist.[COMPLETED]

“you really have got nothing to do on a friday night”  by @bakugohoex (oneshot, fluff)in which your friend keigo invites you to a pro hero event as his plus one, the event leads to a lot more than you expected.[COMPLETED]

Little Moments by @bnhascribbles (oneshot, fluff)Just Hawk's early morning visit.[COMPLETED]

lavender latte✨ by luxdeoro (coffee shop au, fluff, mutual pinning)You serve Hawks a lavender, oat milk latte. Not only is he hooked on your drinks, but he's hooked on you as well.[ONGOING]

a spoonful of sugar✨✨ by Mossful (fluff, angst) In which the Reader bakes and Hawks eats.[COMPLETED]

Pocket Full of Feathers✨ by forthesanityof1 (fluff, humor) You are an investigative journalist starting at a new agency. A chance meeting brings you and Hawks together and starts some odd behaviors on his part. You dismiss it, but end up meeting the hero again and again over time. Slowly, you start to realize things are occurring both within and outside of your control.[COMPLETED]

(Quirk)y Days✨✨ by wotefokizbrunch(fluff, angst, hurt/comfort) In a world where 80% of the population has some wacky power, it is expected for strange shit to happen on accident, or even on purpose, like that one time a villain hit Hawks with a deaging quirk; he left that morning for work his grown ass self and then you had to pick his 5-year-old-self up from the agency.[COMPLETED]

and i've gotta crow ✨by dashielldeveron(enemies to lovers, ) “We’re engaged to be married.” No, you are not. After an accident that was that bastard Hawks’s fault, you decide to play along with your diagnosis of amnesia, among other things, because how far can you make your former bully bend over backwards for you?[COMPLETED]

Color Blind✨ by HeroAssociation(soulmate au, fluff, angst with happy ending) Takami Keigo, otherwise known as the Winged Hero Hawks, had one such mark. He never expected, nor looked for, the person that would change it. Then he found you by accident.[COMPLETED]

The Harpy by romanceisdeadbutimnot(enemies to lovers, fantasy au, fluff) Desperate for adventure you volunteer to check the monster traps protecting your small village. To your surprise you catch a wounded half bird half man, and decide to nurse him back to health.[COMPLETED]

What's Got Your Feathers In A Bunch? by darkenedniqhts(oneshot, fluff, humor)When Hawks saves you from a villain attack, you hit it off surprisingly well, considering the circumstances. Everything is going great, until he meets your roommate.[COMPLETED]

Compelling/tumblr by @bnhascribbles/ ScatteredScribbles(oneshot, hurt/comfort) Hey listen, I’ve got a lot of baggage when it comes to my quirk. Could you repeat the word “yes” if you’re here of your own free will? Oh, and since you’ll probably say that either way and since I’m an emotionally compromised freak, just know that I’ll never actually feel secure in our relationship. This’ll definitely be a recurring thing, and it’s probably gonna be the reason why we end terribly.[COMPLETED]

 Blush by @flannel-cladpika (oneshot, fluff)[COMPLETED]

Headlines✨ by @bnhascribbles(oneshot, fluff) Holding up the newspaper in plain view, you take steady, ominous steps towards his desk. “Any last words, birdbrain?”[COMPLETED]

Stuck In An Elavator With You by @yeahimaloser (oneshot, fluff)he hadn’t really dated anyone before (not seriously anyway), so when he began to develop feelings for a certain someone, he was surprised, to say the least.[COMPLETED]

The Sky is Everywhere by @dira333/Fogfire(oneshot, hurt/comfort, angst with happy ending)Post-Break up is before the Break up…[COMPLETED]

Sometime Around Midnight✨ by 0weCrew(friends to lovers, fluff, hurt/comfort, angst with happy ending) All you wanted to do was enjoy a quiet night looking up at the stars. But fate decided to mess with you instead, and Japan's favorite birdbrain crashed your pity party of one by scaring you shitless.[COMPLETED]

Preening✨ by royalwilds(oneshot, fluff)Hawks loves your hair, playing with it, brushing it, washing it. you realize that it comes from another instinctual nature of his. You try to figure out how to return the gesture.[COMPLETED]

Babybird by Pomenocti(oneshot, fluff)Just Hawks being a dad.[COMPLETED]

Crash✨ by ivan_glee(oneshot, fluff)In which Reader is sunbathing and gets an unexpected visit from the No. 2 hero.[COMPLETED]

A Lungful of Smoke✨ by UnluckyAmulet(oneshot, fluff) As if nearly dying today wasn't bad enough…now you have a crush, too. Damn it.[COMPLETED]

Little Bird by alaskasmonsters(oneshot, fluff) Hawks wasn’t just the charming number two pro-hero the world knew him as. No, he had other sides to him, sides only you, his roommate, had the privilege to uncover. Especially his more birdlike quirks. Like how much he relaxed when people took care of his wings…[COMPLETED]

crawl home to me✨ by Hawnks (supermintfluff)(oneshot, strangers to lovers, hurt/comfort) What is a hero besides determination and hunger? What is a lover if not a resting place?[COMPLETED]

Shiny Things by royalwilds(oneshot, fluff) Hawks has more bird-like tendencies than you initially thought. He likes to present you with odd items as gifts and finally you figure out why.[COMPLETED]

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery by galatiq(oneshot, fluff, humor. coffee shop au) When you put a coffee shop and a nasty storm together, apparently you get Big Bird from Sesame Street crashing into your window. [COMPLETED]

Flowers, Wings, Smirks and Quirks (Ingredients for Love) by ENDisI (oneshot, angst with happy ending, hanahaki disease au) Why was it when you joked about Hanahaki not being real, fate just slaps you awake and tells you "Oh, it's true. You didn't know?" [COMPLETED]

i am your salvation✨ by luxdeoro(oneshot, angst, hurt/comfort) Keigo loses his wings and most of himself, and you're around to try and pick up the pieces.[COMPLETED]

Balcony by RyeTarts(friends to lovers, fluff, slight angst, smut<18+>) After saving you from an office building fire, Hawks thinks that your paths were no longer intertwined. Oh how wrong he would be.[COMPLETED]

Birds Of A Feather by CheerieCherrie(fluff, explicit skippable chp.6) You move to Japan for a change of pace in your hectic life. It doesn't happen, thanks to one chaotic bird man.[COMPLETED]

[bivht]

Astrology Observations

😎Virgo moons are polite and respectful until you cross their boundaries. But people accuse them of being rude even when THEY were the ones put in a super uncomfortable situation

😎Aquarius and sagittarius placements are free-spirited. You tell them to do something and suddenly it’s an obligation rather than a choice and they don’t want to do it anymore lmao

😎Cancer risings and their low-key unhealthy relationship with food :0

😎Taurus is branded as the foodie of the zodiac but I think Sagittarius is the ultimate foodie

😎I like to see the moon sign as who a person is at their core. And the moon sign in your mercury persona chart is very insightful to how you express yourself.

for example:

Aries moon- expresses themselves passionately, perseverant, doesn’t give up easily, likes to keep things tidy, hard working, could be naggy, aggressive

Taurus moon- sweet and charming way of talking, logical, doesn’t like believe anything without concrete evidence, self care, words of affirmation, has definitive personal boundaries, slow down when you’re eating babes, when they’re toxic they’re some of the worst kinds of toxic

Gemini moon- domicile (home sign), real sweet talkers, witty, critical thinking skills on point, charmers, just the right amount of flirty, know how to talk themselves out of a situation, scatterbrained, PERFORMERS

Cancer moon- sweet, will remember your birthday, wants to include everyone, confused easily, overstimulated easily

Leo moon- humorous, dramatic af, will spread love to whoever gives them attention, gives their love to everyone, critical thinking not their forte

Virgo moon- domicile, polite, respectful, knows how to remain professional in awkward situations, hates the feeling of being stuffed full?? 7/10 full is sufficient for them, due to this they’re usually slim, “perfect” self expression, neat and tidy, expresses gratitude for every tiny thing, eats slowly, critical thinking on point, extremely private (esp. about relationships)

Libra moon- diplomatic, likes to agree, charming, soft and sweet but also vengeful, avoids confrontation, talks shit behind backs instead of addressing issue directly with person

Scorpio moon- opinionated, probably a coffee addict, death stares at people they dislike, private but not the same as virgo, virgos tell you things but won’t go into detail, scorpios just won’t tell you. so fiercely loyal, their charm is fatal

Sagittarius moon (detriment)- happy, seems like they’re always having fun, don’t take themselves too seriously, charmers, funny facial expressions, stuff themselves full. they DEVOUR food, tendency to overindulge so can be chubby cheeked, struggle to articulate themselves in a professional manner, hates being nagged, lacks critical thinking, they get bored easily so consistency is an ongoing struggle, can be flirty

Capricorn moon- logical, down to earth, realistic, charming, articulate, their smart little jokes, a bit reluctant to try new things but they will, loves feeling in control (more than anyone else), really patient, consistency is key, can be rude and dry, may make shy, insecure people shifty

Aquarius moon- they talk in a very self-important way, very recognisable tone of voice, an intellectual, research whore, likes to share their found knowledge with people, lecture people, full of themselves

Pisces moon (detriment)- ehhem OVERSHARER to the T, silly humour, a bit unreasonable as they don’t follow logic, poor critical thinking skills, either super empathetic or lacks any empathy, can be flirty

😎More of an assumption but Leo+Virgo (and/or taurus)= hating slimy and mushy textures like eggplant, okra, durian

😎Chiron in the 6h can be obsessed with hygiene and cleanliness. My brother has this and he will not eat from the same spoon or drink from the same straw as anyone else, not even his own mother. He’s criticized and scolded by his mother because of this

😎A mother with 10h mercury is scrutinizing their childrens’ speaking abilities and how they interact with people in public

😎Aries mars has a fit looking body

😎People with sun 1h in the mars persona chart can seem really athletic

😎Sometimes individuals with neptune hard aspects (esp. square) are accused of having a mental illness (bullied)

😎Mars square neptune is a really anxious placement. Their panic is so clear on their face. They get really nervous about things more than others. Their intentions are confusing and people find it hard to figure out what your intentions for your actions are