#after i told him everyday for 2 weeks that my birthday was coming up

[justghostthings]

My partner 💞💞💞💞💞💞🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

[sourcherryandsprinkles]

hiii omg istg your modern jace works have been living in my mind RENT FREE THEY'RE SO DAMN GOOD but like a modern college jace bringing reader to meet rhaenyra and his brothers for the first time would be soooo cute, like i feel like joffery would LOVE that his big bro had a gf and would like pull her to colour with him and do stuff like that and rhaenyra would love her like a daughter, luke would LOVE embarrassing himm <3

Season 2 is premiering right now, but I have to wait until 10pm to watch since I don't have access to HBO Max... Please come to my ask and send me requests/let's talk about the new episode!! I will be opening them after I watch and giving my thoughts on the episode every weeks 🐉⚔️🖤

Thank you  so much for the love for modern!Jace. I really enjoy writing about him. This one was challenging to write as there was a lot of people to write about. I hope you like it!!

my taglists are here + you can send requests here at any time

—

When Jacaerys came home for Thanksgiving, he didn’t tell his family about you. You had only been dating for a couple of weeks and were still getting to know each other. It was too soon to announce that he had someone in his life. But a mother's instinct never fails to recognize the smile on her son’s face whenever he looks at his phone or the hushed phone call she had heard when she walked by Jace’s bedroom. 

Although she wanted to know everything about Jace’s new girlfriend, Rhaenyra respected her son’s privacy and let him tell her in his own time. That was until Luke spilled the beans after coming across a picture on social media where Jace was holding and kissing a girl’s cheek.  

In typical brothers behavior, Jace sent a lot of middle finger emojis to Luke for spilling to their mother. 

After a long phone call with her, a date was set. Joffrey’s birthday was coming up, so Rhaenyra saw it as a good opportunity to meet you. And Joffrey would love for his big brother to be there on his seventh birthday since he missed it last year. 

‘’Mom, we’re home!’’ Jace called as he opened the door of his childhood house, carrying small bags for your weekend stay. 

The sound of footsteps on the second floor filled the small entryway as Jace dropped the bags with a thud, making you jump. You took a deep breath, your nerves getting the best of you.

‘’It’s going to be fine. They’re gonna love you,’’ Jace reassured you, kissing your temple sweetly before an overexcited Joffrey came down the stairs. ‘’Here’s the birthday boy!’’ 

Joffrey hugged Jace, happy that he was home. It must not be easy for him to not see Jace everyday anymore. 

More footsteps came from the back of the house as Rhaenyra, with a blond toddler in her arms, came to greet you. Her warm smile was welcoming. You couldn't help but notice how Jace's features mirrored hers. Except for the hair and eyes. He must have gotten them from his father. 

‘’Hi. It’s lovely to meet you,’’ she said, her voice kind and genuine. ‘’I would give you a hug, but I’m worried Viserys is going to try to pull on your hair… He picked up this bad habit last week and we’re working on it.’’ 

You smiled, feeling a bit more at ease. ‘’No worries, it’s nice to meet you too, Mrs. Targaryen,’’ you replied, glancing at the curious toddler who was eyeing you with fascination. 

‘’Please, call me Rhaenyra.’’

Joffrey tugged at your and Jace’s sleeves, his eyes wide with excitement. ‘’Come, I want to show you my birthday cake. There’s a big dragon on it.’’ 

Rhaenyra was quick to correct the young boy, laughing dryly. ‘’There is no birthday cake in this house.’’ 

You chuckled politely, figuring out that Joffrey must have seen the cake by accident and Rhaenyra was trying to keep it a surprise. 

‘’Jace told me you have a massive dragon collection,’’ you said, driving the young boy’s attention to something else than the birthday cake. ‘’Is that true?’’ 

Joffrey grinned and began to tell you all about his dragons. He fetched some from the playing room and brought them over to show you on the couch, giving you all sorts of information about dragons. There was one of every color and size. Some had horns and a threatening stare, while others looked simply beautiful. 

While you were occupied with Joffrey, Jace went upstairs to drop your bags in his bedroom. When it came back, he watched the two of you from the corner, finding it sweet how quick Joffrey took a liking to you. He was usually shy around new people. 

‘’Where’s Luke and Aegon?’’ 

Rhaenyra set Viserys down on the floor so he could play with his blocks, and shook her head. ‘’I don’t know. Probably upstairs. Aegon is with Daemon in the backyard. Since we cleaned the old playset, he always wants to go outside.’’ 

Leaning over the banister, Jace called out to Luke.  ‘’Luke! Come here, you little shi—’’ 

‘’Language,’’ Rhaenyra scolded, her eyes pointing at Joffrey and Viserys. 

He apologized and you bit back a smile. He truly was a mama’s boy.

You didn’t meet Aegon and Daemon — Jace’s step father — until dinner. The latter looked intimidating, but he kindly smiled at you as you shook his hand. As he was helping his wife getting the food on the table, she gave him a subtle nod of approval, silently telling him that she liked you.

‘’I told you my mom would like you,’’ Jace said, pulling you with him in the hallway while the younger ones were being bathed and put to bed. His arms were around you, chasing your worries away.

You took a deep breath, feeling the tension leave your body as you smiled up at him. ‘’Now I know where you got your kindness and charm from.’’ 

‘’You think I’m charming?’’ 

Rolling your eyes, you tried to get away, but Jace didn’t let you. 

‘’Joffrey is very fond of you too,’’ he continued, his eyes sparkling with amazement. ‘’I’ve never seen him so at ease with someone he doesn’t know.’’ 

‘’He gave me a full lesson about dragons. He is so sweet.’’ 

Hearing this made Jace happy. For him, family was very important, so it meant a lot to him that you were getting along with his family. 

His gaze softened, his eyes locking onto yours before leaning down to kiss you. Your fingers gripped the fabric of his zip-up hoodie, kissing him back until  a loud, exaggerated gagging sound broke through the moment. 

You both turned to see Luke standing at the end of the hallway, a mischievous grin plastered on his face. 

‘’Do you want to see Jace as a baby?’’ Luke asked with gleeful enthusiasm. ‘’He had chubby cheeks…like Theodore from Alvin and the Chipmunks.’’

Jace groaned in embarrassment and you chuckled, imagining baby Jace with chubby cheeks. ‘’I’d love to see those photos,’’ you teased, nudging Jace playfully.

But Luke wasn't done. ‘’Do you know why there is no school picture of him in fifth grade?’’ he continued, leaning against the wall, clearly relishing the moment. ‘’There was this guy at school who was bullying me and Jace decided to put his big brother pants on and take him on a fight. This guy was two inches taller than him and much bigger, so Jace lost and fell, which knocked his front tooth out the night before picture day at school.’’

You laughed, picturing a brave little Jace standing up for his brother. ‘’You’ve always been protective, I see,’’ you said, turning to Jace.  A small smile tugged at his lips. ‘’Okay. Luke, that’s enough,’’ Jace decided, taking you away from him before more embarrassing stories could come out of his brother’s mouth.

—

House of the dragon taglist: @khaleesihavilliard @domoron @ididliquorice @lover-of-helios @lover-of-helios @shine101 @tanyaherondale @mikariell95 @serrendiipty @lantsovheiress @gilliananderfuckme @shine101 @tetgod @clayzayden@memeorydotcom @tnu-ree @futuregws @blackravena @winxschester @mysteriouslydelightfulchaos @xxlaynaxx @secretsthathauntus @pilarxxxaguayo @emmavan39 @stargaryenx @erylilly @bbblackmamba @rainedrop97 @dreamer087 @gothicgay14 @ashlatano7567 @superkittywonderland @justaproudslytherpuff @evesolstice @buckysmainhxe @padfootsvixen @scarletmeii @evesolstice @dkathl @kaywsworld @tetgod @padfootsvixen @domoron  @weird-addiction @angeliod @xjennyx2 @adaydreamaway08  @mymultiveres  @secretsthathauntus  @puffycreamcakes @thirsty4nonlivingmen @naty-1001 @katiepie67 @moshpot24x @hc-geralt-23 @lovelynerdytraveler @saturn-sas  @zgzgh @sssjuico10 @tabloidteen @timetoten @deekaag @wondxrgurl @aerangi @strmborns @astridyoo15 @daemonslittlebitch @queenbeestuffs @severewobblerlightdragon @agentstarkid @msliz @vane1999-blog @fairyfolkloresposts @todaywasafairytale07 @otomaniac @zgzgzh @thebeardedmoon @golden-library @kikyrizuki @hnslchw @camy85 @winxschester @armstrongscommentsection @withfireandbl00d @randomstory56 @JudgmentDays-Girl @darylandbethfanforever9 @darylandbethfanforever9 @aegonswife @dakotapaigelove @jays-bullshit

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[navire190413]

sooooooooo i passed jlpt n1! i officially have proof that i am somewhat fluent in japanese. very surprised i passed since i drank until 3 am the night before and i was so hungover the room was spinning while doing the reading section. my score even isnt that bad haha.

this weekend was a whirlwind. spent everyday with x-chan and was all ラブラブwith him, like we usually are. went to Uotoku, a fancy-ish 海鮮 izakaya in Ikebukuro, on friday night as a date. i made the mistake of reserving a table on their rooftop... i assumed they would have fans like most outside dining places do, but no such luck. it was incredibly hot. we just ate バターホタテ andマグロ刺身 then left because x-chan couldn't keep himself from complaining about how much he was sweating.

then we went to an old-style izakaya that was super cheap. while using the smoking booth, an older man came in and started talking to me about whats it like living in tokyo as an american and my tattoos. i thought nothing of it. just casual small talk while awkwardly standing in a glass box together. when i got back to the table, x-chan was upset that i spoke to another man and didnt just ignore him instead.

random picture of me in the smoking booth x-chan took of me lol

after the izakaya, we went to our usual bar since it was our friend's birthday party. we picked her out some stuff from Lush before going on our date that night.

after the bar, i tried confessing to him in front of ikebukuro station (hahahahah), but it just turned into a fight about how we have no trust between us and my heart isn't pure (i dont want to explain what happened between us in the past. neither of us cheated, physically or emotionally. he just has insane expectations about what is "good behaviour"). we were fighting for so long we almost missed the last train. basically it came down to the fact that since im pursuing him right now, i shouldnt see other guys but since he's not pursuing me, if he has a chance to take a girl on a date he wouldn't say no if he thought he would come to like her. soooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo.

but despite the argument, we still hungout on saturday. we went to our usual izakaya in ikebukuro and laughed about how big of alcoholics we've turned into. after that we went to the pokemon center at sunshine city. x-chan bought me some new handkerchiefs since im collecting them, and a mimikyu coin case since i desperately needed one. afterwards we went to gacha-pon like we always do. he really wanted a cool pokemon gacha, so we went to gigo after sunshine city to try to find one. we found a cool gachapon but he ended up getting 2 of the pokemon he wanted the least, so we just weny to our usual bar and left them there since it’s littered with gacha toys.

a really drunk woman started talking to us, and asking about our relationship. i told her we were exes, so of course she had to ask about what happened and why the fuck we're casually drinking with eachother and hugging on eachother. she first sided with x-chan, then sided with me and eventually told me to find a better guy if he decides to not pick me in the end because im too cute and カッコいい for that shit. that pissed x-chan off, but i convinced him to just ignore her.

we parted ways at the last train.

i got home and drank some more. while drinking, x-chan calls me and we talk until like 3AM. we made plans for the next day as well.

the next day we go to ueno to eat sushi, then go to karaoke, then go to gachapon, then go to another one of our usual izakayas.

when we broke up, a big reason was that i didnt quit smoking cigarettes (i never said i would, by the way). but lately x-chan has been smoking a lot of my cigarettes when we're together. i think its funny but im also screaming hypocrite in my head the entire time.

he actually invited me to his place last night. which is the first time in a month. i was staying at his house almost 3 days a week up until a month ago. we got into a big fight about how weird he is about human relationships. he's lonely but hates people, so i was trying to give him some advice which he called stupid. soooo i may have told him to just go ahead and die alone if he doesnt want to change. after that he got really cold towards me, but lately has been nicer. he ended up getting kind of sick an hour later so we decided to go to our separate places instead. but he invited me to come over on friday since we've been going out too much and spending too much money.

i am so stressed about this stupid fucking relationship hahah. we have plans to go to disneyland, tokyo game show, and 2 other live shows in the next two months. he's even talking to me about going to korea together in november. its so difficult. i know if he finds another girl to date before those events, he'll take her instead of me so i'm kind of panicking a bit. but it'll be what it'll be.

all my friends, american and japanese, despise him and want me to cut him off immediately since he is very obviously border-line mentally abusive. but i cant just cut off my best friend and the person i have the most fun with. i know this will probably end badly, but i really enjoy the time we spend together when we’re not bickering and he says he really does too. we just have a lot to work through if there’s the time to do so before he finds someone else.

also got this message from my american ex about me passing the jlpt and it felt like a shot to the heart. oof. ouch.

ANYWAYS enough about that. i’m gonna start studying for the 漢字能力検定 since im all done with the jlpt. i really gotta get my 漢字 knowledge up. i think im already level 4 out of 10, with 1 being the hardest. it’s a kanji test aimed towards native speakers, and even then 1 and 2 are apparenlty super hard. i took a couple practice tests and passed level 5, but gonna start with level 5 first for some review. you actually have to write the kanji for the test, so its gonna be challenging for me despite being pretty good at remembering how to write kanji. i picked up a study book on my way home and knew about 95% of what i saw while flipping through. just gotta get used to the test structure and everything. only issue is trying to learn the definitions along with the kanji, which will be some extra time studying compared to native speakers. finally excited to be studying again. i studied for years for the jlpt and it was so grueling and boring towards the end after being able to recognize all the grammar points and a majority of the vocabulary.

[teamkrissy]

 And now we come to the series of unfortunate events that I suffered in October and November of 2014. How much should I share? They aren't really relevant to Arachne, except for that they are the reason we had to move again. I'm sure she felt it, she saw me cry, she nestled on my lap with concern and worry for my tears. She watched me pack up our beautiful kitchen and take the cat grass down from the window where she could see the birds. Did she notice the absence of people from my life? The ones who came over every once in a while who we would never see again? Did she smell and then not smell the pregnancy pheromones?

 Our apartment complex was being saved from ruin by a bigger, stronger real estate firm. Its true, over the past 3 months, the pipes were burst and steaming in my ceiling every morning. We had become friends with the singular maintenance man, he was in our apartment every day before I went to work. I made him coffee and he applied another layer of duct tape to the pipes. The apartment became humid and left stains on the last birthday present I had given to my father (a white throw pillow.) There was also a plague of fleas from the upstairs neighbor who cared for strays. Arachne was so sick. At night, she would sleep in bed with me, under the blankets. In the morning, sometimes she would wake me up by trying to suckle from me. I tried all the flea collars and the drops. I sprinkled the carpet with baking soda, salt and diatomaceous earth and vacuumed everyday. There was a fresh new cake every time I emptied the vacuum's container. I took Arachne to a friend's and bug bombed the apartment. Eventually I went to the vet again and they said that the fleas had developed a resistance to everything on the market and now could only be eradicated through prescription drops. I got the drops!

  The new management left a notice on my door, stating I had 31 days to either vacate or sign a new lease with them for an unit that hadn't been built yet. Unfortunately, the notice was placed on the first day of my bereavement leave. Arachne was at a friend's house and I was driving out of state to help my family grieve for two weeks.

 So I returned to the apartment with just over 2 weeks to find a place for us to live. I told my boss, this may be a two week notice. Coworkers tried to help find places. Friends tried to offer their couches, again. I didn't make much money, everything in my price range had at least a two month wait list that I could join. The yet-to-be-built apartment the new management was offering was out of my price range, even after some haggling. I was exhausted. I quit my job and did something I had long ago vowed never to do. I moved into my Mom's boyfriend's house.

[diamonddstudded]

Hi I would really appreciate it if you could give me your input/thoughts into the situation I’m in💕 so I’ve been talking to a guy Over a year long distance we met on bumble...from the start I told him my intentions was a relationship and he said he wanted the same and was very persistent with me from the very beginning (talking everyday, very complimentary of me constantly swiping up on all my stories I posted of myself) he seemed to be very interested. We were talking for months even prior to me going to see him (which I was already going there for my birthday with friends) so we finally meet I ended up going alone because my friend got sick and at that point I was just wanting to meet him. So I travel to see him take the plane and what bothered me was he didn’t take time off of work so majority of the time I was there I was alone in the hotel, we really didn’t do much because he was working and he also said he was broke he kept trying to hookup with me but we didn’t fully hookup ...so I met another guy that I ended up having fun with, he we went out to bar, got dinner with and went to the beach with. I was honestly really upset about the guy I was talking to for months because I went there for him....he found out that I met another guy he was mad at me and said “he couldn’t trust me, that I had to prove myself to him” I told him how I felt and why I did that and he seemed to think it wasn’t justified...so we talk more he expresses to me how he wants a relationship again making me think he’s really interested by how much attention, consistency and overall compliments he gives me. I go there again, we drink and hookup but he leaves me without any explanation later he gets back into communication with me (after blocking me) saying I was talking to him about another guy when I was drunk that’s why he left...at this point I’m really upset by the way I am being treated and it just doesn’t make any sense to me. I ask him if he has a girlfriend he denies it...I go there again months later and same thing we drink and hookup again but I don’t even remember it. I wake up and he’s gone again and he has me blocked...I finally get in contact with him while I’m there and he tells me how he saw my phone and saw I was talking to other men that’s why he left called me “dirty and a hoe” but I expressed to him that I didn’t know how it was going to go that’s why I was potentially going to meet another guy. I was blocked for the rest of the trip....I put so much time, energy and genuineness into it with him and he would constantly lie, flip it on me making it my fault when it was never my intention to hookup with him...so I don’t know why he would do this to me. I really don’t get it. We get in contact again like 2 weeks later when I get back from the flight and he again is expecting me to apologize to him, made me feel bad about it all he said we were supposed to do way more then he saw my phone...I was going to go there again but then I get a call and find out he’s had a girlfriend this whole time...I told her everything sent her over 30 screenshots of it all (which described it all, our conversations that talked about it all...) she was so calm saying “hes had his sides before he’s just immature” where I was very upset...and confused as to why she even reached out to me at all? She said they broke up but then months later contacted me again asking if I was still talking to him...and how he was talking to her. Anyway, he’s still stalking my profile everyday many times a day, still trying to see me while still with the girlfriend I don’t get why he would do this and continue to do it...he even called me pure after the first time meeting. He’s been reaching out to me asking me to come I asked him to call me because I said he’s being aloof, send him one word responses he goes “I’m sorry but maybe soon” but doesn’t...but expects me to come?? I know I shouldn’t be so hung up on it but I honestly put so much time, energy into it. We had countless conversations of me being so upset with him, telling him my intention and he would have me come

Hi, okay so this sounds kinda challenging for you.

Tbh this guy's behavior looks like a big redflag!! He appears inconsistent, disrespectful and very manipulative.

If I were in your situation I would just block him and cut off all contact.

I think you deserve a healthy relationship, please prioritize your own well-being.

And I’m sure that someone better will come your way!!

[girltomboy]

My birthday weekend was so wonderful. My boyfriend and I attended the graduation ceremony for his class, he chose to not participate because he thought, since he didn't pass the year, he technically did not graduate. But we didn't know he *could* have participated, and they called his name but he was not there on the stage. And he tried to play it cool but I could tell he was a little bit hurt by it. He said it's meaningless anyway, since it's only symbolic and doesn't actually count as anything. I was frustrated that he wouldn't even go get his graduation diploma, but he insisted it's nothing so we forgot about it.

Near midnight he paused what we were watching and ran to the store to buy me a small cake and stuck a lit joint in it to wish me a happy birthday 😭 it was so cute I was sure I would cry but I didn't because I was happy in a cheerful way, not an emotionally raw way. And it was just funny. And he got me the pig plushie that I had seen in a thrift store window two days in a row. I literally wanted to go buy it myself but the store closes before I finish work. And on the day before my birthday when we walked by that store again, the plushie was not there anymore, and I wanted to point it out to him but I didn't (I regret not doing it now because I keep imagining what his reaction would have been!). And he also got me space erasers and a sweet card with a wooden whale on it. He only wrote "happy birthday, I love you" on it and apologized for not writing something more. I kind of expected to read more than that but I'm grateful for everything he did for me to have a nice birthday. He made me a delicious breakfast and then we went out and had taco bell and ice cream by the lake. And the next day my bestfriend came to the city with her boyfriend for some uni-related errands, and she gave me a lovely gift and introduced me to her bf. He is a guy she had been talking to for YEARS, he was texting her from Germany when we were in uni, and they were just friends talking about stuff. I remember how she used to tell me she thought about what if they were together, but she said she would not consider it because he's younger (and shorter). Really mind-blowing story they have. But they look cute together, and he's a Gemini like her. She told me about her job, and that she might come to the beach with us, which got me extremely hype and excited!! She got me a heat changing mug, some spring charms, and a colorful turtle bracelet that I never want to take off.

After that my bf left to his parents' house for the summer, and since then my week has been mostly empty, and so so so so sleepy. I had such a hard time waking up and staying focused at work the whole week. And it felt weird not looking forward to meeting and hanging out with my bf after work. I've just been napping and using my phone way too much. We video call but it's not the same, I like it way less now that I've had a taste of being with him physically everyday. Even though we spent the whole first 2 ish years of our relationship on video calls. But at least we spend time on discord with our other friends too, I'd been missing them and gaming together.

I only slept 5 hours last night and today I kind of want to go buy another box dye, a lighter shade this time. Last week I dyed my hair some kind of blonde, but it looks too warm for me, and my bf said it looks darker 💀 somehow. So I want to get that, some shaving foam, and body lotion. Also kitchen sponges, eggs, bread, some yogurt, parsley, and some razors. I plan on resuming my yoga routine (I've been perpetually exhausted and haven't done it in 4 days), using some hot cream for my back because it's been bothering me a bit, dye my hair + shower, and give myself a lotion massage. I've been watching OITNB and I forgot how emotional this show used to make me.

[zzztobi]

𖥻 ‹𝟹 pairing: dilf!bokuto x fem!reader

𖥻 ‹𝟹 tw: fluff, oral sex (f), love confession (?), dILF BOKUTO. (not proofread like always :p) nsfw content mdni.

𖥻 ‹𝟹 wordcount: 1,6k

you've been looking for a job for the longest time know, applying to every place you found, not even minding what the job was about. that is until one of your father's coworkers, called bokuto, asked you about giving some general classes to his 8 y/o son. all you needed to do is help him with his homework and assigments. an easy job and well paid, that is.

you knocked on the door, waiting for your dad's coworker to open it. you would have expected a normal size house, like yours for example. but man, this house was huge. a far "coming!" could be heard and the most handsome, big and attractive man opened the door with the brighest smile.

“ah, you must be (y/n), right?” still amazed by his presence, you just nodded, cheeks now a pinkish color. “well, c'mon c'mon, don't just stand on the doorway darling.”

he pulled you in to his house, still smiling to you. the nickname he gave you taking you by surprise, making your cheeks to grow redder. the interior of the house was almost blinding due to the white walls and furniture being reflected by all the dazzling lights. just a few pictures of him and his kid hanging around.

“your father told me you were a really good student, so that's why i thought you could help my son, but he didn't tell me you were this pretty.” he approached you, big hand on your lower back montioning you to keep walking inside, making you shiver a little. “my son is in his room. just walk upstairs to the second room on your right.” he kept that bright smile on his face the whole time. “i'll prepare something for the both of you!”

and with that he went to the open kitchen. you just muted an almost inaudible “okay” and went to his son's room where a kid looking exactly the same as his father was waiting for you.

after the first day, came a lot more. then weeks and months, you were earning a lot of money thanks to bokuto. and his son was doing pretty good in school thanks to you.

everyday you got to know a little more about him, since he always had a little chat with you after the study session was over. your learned that he divorced his wife after he knew she was cheating on him. that was when his son was barely 2 years old. then, he won the trial and the custody of his son.

he didn't get married again because he was really focused on his job and his son. that taking all his time in the day. you didn't know why but that information gave you some sort of relief. you learned that he was indeed way younger that your dad, 35 years old.

you noticed his behaviour towards you changed a little everyday, for the better of course. he would always compliment your outfit or hair, even if you just wore some sweatpants and a shirt. he always assured you that you looked good with anything.

you even started to put a little more effort on the way you looked just to hear his “you look really pretty today (y/n)!” or his “wow, you sure are beutiful!”. every compliment igniting somehing in you, something you were to scared to accept. 

today was like any other day, your dad drove you to bokuto’s house, you waited outside of it after knocking a few times and waited for him to open the door for you. but this time he opened the door a little surprised to see you here, a frown adorning his beautiful face.

“what are you doing here today? my son’s in a birthday party!” you just looked at him, mimicking his frown. then it hit him, he didn’t tell you that piece of information. “oh shit, i forgot to text you about it right?” he looked through his phone, searching for the message he never wrote and never sent you. 

“don’t worry bokuto-san! i can call my dad again to pick me up.” you smiled at him, a smile so bright and wide that made his heart jump everytime. a smile that he caught himself thinking about at anytime in the day. that derived  on him thinking about you; the way you talked, how your eyes squinted when you smiled, the way your hips moved, the shine of your hair, the colour of your lips. fantasazing after how good they would look around his cock or moaning his name. 

he thought this opportunity was given to him by god himself, he could not let it slip through his fingers. “oh no please! come inside, let me invite you to some coffee for the drive here! it’s my fault after all.” 

the evening with bokuto went by so fast with all the jokes and story telling, really enjoying spending time with him. in one of all the fit of laughters that you had during the evening, you placed your left hand on bokuto’s arm while you grasped your tummy with the other one, crying and laghing because of some of his colleges stories. 

that subtle touch and the happiness on your face made something ignite inside of bokuto’s chest. something that he hasn’t felt since the first years of marriage with his ex wife. something that he’s been longing for so long. something that he only found on you again. 

he put his own hand on top of yours, making you to look up at him. your heart doing backflips on your chest. this is where you realized your feelings. feelings that you kept bottled up, afraid for he outcome of it. 

you were afraid of his reaction. did he felt the same way? there’s no way, he was your “boss”. but if he did correspond your feelings, how would people react to it? it frightened you, what people would think about it, how would your parents react to it. for god’s sake he was your father’s coworker! this was supposed to be a job relationship with no feelings involved! 

all of this blurred out when you caressed his face and pressed your lips on his. a kiss so awaited by both of you, that took bokuto by surprise, but that he happily returned ignoring his inner voice telling him that this was wrong. 

he succumbed to the kiss, to the way your lips moved along his, the sound you made when he granted access to your own mouth with his tongue, to the feeling of your fingers caressing his cheeks and neck. he succumbed to you.

soon the kiss turned messy and desperate, tongues lapping and teeth clacking. his hands roamed your body, scared that if he stopped you would disappear. breaking the kiss you both looked at each other lovingly as if you were trying to express your feelings with your eyes. feelings that tip toed on your tongues, too scared to say something.

“y/n, i know this sounds crazy but fuck, i really like you.” your eyes widened at his confession. “i know this is wrong and i'm too old. but no matter how much i want to, i can't seem to get you out of my head.” bokuto looked nervous. surely his confession was something that you didn't expect but damn if it didn't make your heart burst.

taking both of his hands on yours, your eyes met his and with a warm smile you leaned into him again almost pressing your lips on him. “i like you too bokuto” the kiss was nothing like the first; it was soft and lovingly, pouring both of your hearts into it — all of your feelings exposed to each other.

your bodies soon moved upstairs to his bedroom. you laid on your back with bokuto's lips still on yours. his hands were everywhere: your waist, your hips, your thighs, your face. every inch if your skin was covered with his kisses and hands.

playing with them hem of your shirt he stopped, his eyes looked at you with pure lust and love. “can i baby?” you nodded too lost in the scent that surrounded you — bokuto's scent. “i'm gonna need more than that. use your words pretty” your eyes never left his face. “yes kou, i give you full consent to do anything with me”

he growled, pressing his forehead on your tummy. “you're gonna drive me crazy” resuming his movements, he took off your shirt with your own help. his shirt and sweatpants came after, only you left in a pair of shorts. pulling them down he almost salivated at the sight of your covered pussy in some blue underwear.

pressing wet kisses on your thighs, his fingers played with your covered folds earning some whimpers from you. he then proceeded to take off your underwear, now dampened with your slick. placing both of your legs on his shoulders, he looked back at you and smirked before giving a little kiss to your clit.

that little kiss turned into kitten licks and then into long desperate ones. his hot tongue ran through your folds, tasting every part of you as if your pussy was the first meal he had in ages. his tongue played with your pussy while two of his fingers thrusted into you. wet sounds and moans filling his senses.

he felt your walls clenching around his fingers, announcing your upcoming orgasm along with your high pitched moans and some “please, bokuto” he never stopped his ministrations, if so, he increased them. “i know baby, i know. just cum for me yeah? be a good girl and cum on my tongue” and with that you reached your high, the coiling feeling on your stomach unraveling.

at that exact moment you didn't care about what people would say. the only thing you knew was that bokuto was the man you would like to spend the rest of your life with.

©️ zzztobi 2022 — all rights reserved. please don't repost, translate or copy any of my work.

[snowdrop-ivy]

Favor. | Part 1

Summary: Ari Levinson was an ego embodied in a man. Yep, he's an asshole. Y/N knows it yet she still married him. How? She doesn't know. And now, she doesn't know how to get him to sign the divorce papers.

A/N: I got this idea from watching TRSDR haha so I decided to put my imagination and give it a go. LMK if u see any errors or if you liked it. This will be a mini series. Part 2 will be posted soon.

Word count: 4193

TW: Mentions of guns and violence.

A busy night in Wolfson Medical Center made Y/N's head ache more. Hundreds of people in line waiting to get checked while she hasn't had any time to eat or even drink water. Maybe that was better so she wouldn't think about that scumbag she used to call husband.

Y/N looked at the line to see the chairs full of people.

"I'll get some coffee. Send in the next patient will I do," Y/N told her secretary, Anna. Anna nodded.

Y/N went to the pantry when Dr. Jensen saw her. Dr. Jensen works in the surgery ward while Y/N decided to not to because he thought it'd be better if she does the in-patient and clinics. It's much busier there and when it's busy, Y/N's there.

"Long line, huh?" Dr. Jensen mentioned as she's getting coffee.

"Yep, lots of people," Y/N stretched but the pain on her shoulder became worse. This has been bothering her for weeks but some Ibuprofen masks it, so that's okay.

"You should get that shoulder checked out," He said when he noticed her visible pain.

She nodded. "Yeah, I'll get in line." Dr. Jensen shook his head and laughed at her joke. Y/N passed by her charts at the front desk to sign some of it. The nurses were talking to her all at once to inform about status, requests, and updates. Mind-bending. She told all of them what to do so she could return to her desk and get the line shorter. If it gets shorter, people get checked in everyday here. Hospitals are always full due to refugees coming in. She doesn't mind though, She always doesn't. That's her sickness.

"How can I help you?" She entered the room while looking at her charts. Once she brought it down...

"You have got to be kidding me!" She huffed. Lo and behold, the reason of her insanity is sitting in front of her with a test swab on his plump, pink, kissable fucking lips.

"Calm down," He stood then stepped forward to get closer to her but Y/N stopped him.

"I am calm, Levinson, stop right there." Y/N was firm on not getting him near her. Inside this small clinic that she has.

Y/N looked at him. He's wearing a gray shirt covered up by a flannel; her flannel. And he still has that disgusting, yucky, a little attractive-- just a little, mustache. His hair never changed from when they last saw each other, which was what? A year ago; when she threw her rings and slammed the divorce paper on him.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" She asked with her hands on her waist, glaring at him. She hates him, emphasis on the hate because she really does. Y/N looked over at Anna who was hiding behind the sphygmomanometer machine. "What the fuck is he doing here?"

Anna's lip trembled, her eyes exchanging from the chart to her, and shrugged. "Front desk said he's next."

Y/N looked between the two of them and dismissed her. "What do you want?" Y/N asked after she closed the door then leaned on it, crossing her arms and legs.

"I want you to calm down," Ari said, copying her stance.

"I told you, Ari, I am fucking calm," She gritted through her teeth.

"I need to talk to you. Five minutes."

Y/N looked at her watch that was ironically gifted to her by Ari on her birthday. 7:50. "No, three minutes. Start talking."

Ari grabbed his bag and explained his plan to extract another batch of Ethiopian Jews in Sudan. That's what they do. Y/N was an Israeli Mossad agent as well but she decided to stop after their last extraction since Ari was arrested and well, they got divorced. Not legally but they separated. Well, She separated. Ari's plan was to lease a diving resort in a lawless land in Sudan while Bimro would take groups to walk a thousand km to the port and will be met by boats to load them into a cargo. Y/N was impressed. Ari was smart, intelligent.

"I need you, Y/N, for this to work."

She rolled her eyes. "Of course, you need me, Ari. You always do, right?"

Ari stayed silent. He knows how to handle Y/N when she's on a frenzy like this. He just stays silent. He sat down and listened. Her words stung but he couldn't blame her. Ari knows he's not the best-- even an okay husband. And him standing in front of her for help is a dumb fucking thing.

Both of them stayed silent. She's calming herself and Ari was giving her the time she needs. She sat down and gathered his files to look at and assess. She asked questions and he answered. Together, unknowingly, they brainstormed. That's how they two worked. Ari was the mastermind, Y/N was the details. That's why Ari needs her, so she can plan it out carefully to the tiniest details.

"So, what do you say?"

She sized him up, squinting at his blue orbs. She's trying to find out why Ari needs her on this when he has people who can join him on this. She won't admit it but she misses the action; the thrill of it all. Their job was risky but that's the risk she's always willing to take. No doubt.

She scoffed. "It's funny how you ask for my help yet you haven't signed the divorce papers."

His jaw clenched at that word-- divorce. He hated it. In fact, he hated it so much he tore it apart. He gets that he was a jerk but he couldn't figure out why it led to divorce. What did he do that she despised him so much? Was it the job? No, Y/N loves the job. Was it him? Maybe.

"And now you won't answer me?" She breathed, massaging her temples. "Ari, look at me."

Ari looked at her and all he saw was... sadness. She looked so done. And she is. Y/N waited years for Ari to change and put her on his list but didn't. That last extraction was the last straw for her.

"Okay," He huffed, stood up and went to her until they were face to face with him. He leaned down to her height until an inch of space was left between the two. Until he can hear the loud beat of her heart. Until he can smell her scent, her familiar scent he can't get enough of: Vanilla. Her staple scent. "I'll sign it if you come with me."

"Oh you have got to be fucking kidding me!" She yelled, pushing him to create enough space between them two "Quit playing me, Ari!"

Mad is an understatement for what she is feeling. She knows she isn't so calm right now and people are waiting outside. Also, it's also unprofessional but she swears right now that what she wants is to choke the life out of him.

"Hey," Ari tried to soothe her but she pushed him away, again. "Woah! Stop pushing me!"

"Stop playing with me!"

"I am not playing with you!"

"Then what the fuck are you doing?!"

"I need you!" Ari shouted. His hands went through his hair. "I fucking need you, Y/N!"

Y/N wasn't shocked when she heard that. She's used to Ari needing her everytime and forgetting her when it's over. "Really?"

She looked at him. His gaze was so intense, eyes burning with honesty. He didn't say anything, he just slowly nodded.

"But when were you when I needed you?"

Ari looked at her, and he saw what he broke. The seven years of pain from their marriage was evident in her eyes. He couldn't answer her, not because he knew how to handle her but because he didn't know what to say. He was an asshole, he knows it and he doesn't deny it.

She opened the door. Wide. "Just leave, A. Just text me the details and sign my divorce papers."

Y/N spent the night finishing up the patients and packing. She doesn't have much to do so she decided to soak herself in a bath. A privilege she gets when he can. She placed herself in a nice, hot, and soothing lavender bath to help her ease her tension and mind. Y/N poured herself red wine while bathing. The wine was a bit of a bad decision because it did not ease her mind; it made her think of him and the memories they had.

Days have passed. She continued with the same routine until he received the details of the operation; they're leaving in two days to go to Germany meaning she has two days to pack which means that she has to go back to their shared home to do so. She doesn't have any clothes in her apartment other than coats and scrubs. Y/N looked for her key and drove down there. She wondered if Ari was staying there or somewhere. Y/N headed out the car and stared at their home, what used to be their home.

"Okay, close your eyes and lay out your hands," Ari smiled. It was their first anniversary. They're currently in Israel for an operation but it didn't stop Ari to buy flowers and surprise his wife.

Y/N followed him. She opened her eyes to a box, a small black box with a card that read "Happy first anniversary, wife."

"Ari," She gasped. "What is this?"

He shrugged and kissed her, a soft but gentle peck on her lips. "Only the best for the best wife."

Heads turned their way when she screamed and jumped into his arms. It was a key! She knew what it meant since they've been talking about buying a house. She really did not bother what it looked like as long as she got to live in it with him for the rest of their lives.

Y/N shook her head and took a deep breath before walking up the steps and jangling her key inside. At this moment, her breath's heaving, her palms sweating and knees trembling. Is Ari there? Did someone break in while they were gone? She patted her leg for the gun in her thigh holster.

A cold gust of air greeted her along with the pitch blackness of the house. She took a deep breath and walked around the living room full of dust. It looked untouched from when they last left or when she last left; a year ago. Y/N decided to walk around and explore their house. Nothing has changed, even the curtains closed so she opened it and was greeted with dust. She coughed from the enormous amount of dust that lived in it. She got alerted when she heard a commotion up the stairs. It sounded above the living room and that was their master's bedroom.

Is Ari here? She asked herself again. She walked up the stairs and took out her gun. It got silent, dead silent, when she got in front of the door.

She counted up to three while holding the knob. She took a deep breath and opened it before flashing her gun.

Oh...

It's just Ari...

Naked.

Like naked with his hands up, his cocky eyes enjoying what she was seeing. She was shocked. No, she took a step back with her wide eyes and mouth, face flushing from embarrassment.

"Freeze?" He wiggled his brows and smirked, eyes gleaming when he realized it was his wife.

She couldn't answer because he was still naked. His member smiled up at her. The ray of sun glistened on him and it made him... shiny? She shook her head, closed her mouth, and kept them in a straight line.

"What..." She breathed, her breaths heaving from the shock. "Are you doing here?"

"Well, honey," He smiled, grabbed a towel, and wrapped it on his waist. "I live here."

Oh... right...

"What are you doing home?" He emphasized on the home, raised his brow, still smiling. What the hell is he smiling about?

She didn't answer him yet. She went straight to the closet, got a bag, set it on the bed, and packed clothes while Ari was lying on the bed, fully clothed, watching her with his hands behind his neck and legs wide open showing his thing--his big thing.

"Deja vu, huh?"

She raised a brow and glared at him. "Yeah," She nodded. "I pack, you watch me leave."

He huffed. "Hey," He sat straight. "I went after you."

She looked at him square in the eyes. "I didn't ask you to." She grabbed her bag, headed straight to the car, and bawled her eyes out. She knew what he was doing yet she still can't make her way out of his charm. Y/N thought she had moved on but whenever she sees him, it all comes back to square one. The one where she'd drop everything for her. The one where he doesn't.

The next time they saw each other was in Germany. They had to go to NATCOR for their passports; their new identity. She doesn't know who decided her persona but she doesn't like it, not one bit.

"Really? We're married? Even on this we're married?" Y/N asked as she browsed her passport and new wedding ring which was her real wedding ring.

Ari had that smug, smile-y, arrogant smirk on his face and shrugged his shoulders. "I did not decide that."

Her eyes went around the table to see who was on this ruse but all of them shrugged. She looked at Ethan next and he decided to go back to his office and close the door. In the end, she rolled her eyes and slumped back on the chair, crossing her arms and legs.

"Okay, come on, you're up first. Your name?" Ari sat on the edge of the table with his arms on his lap, stared at her, waiting for her answer.

"Je m'appelle Charlotte Thomas. Né le 14 décembre 1989. Je suis marié et voyage avec mon mari pour une lune de miel," Y/N sighed after. Her persona is Charlotte Thomas, a married wife who is on their anniversary.

"Why are you here?"

She huffed. "Je voyage avec mon mari ici pour fêter notre anniversaire de trois ans."

Y/N raised her brow at him. He's still smiling, a wide, up the ear smile. His eyes and ears enjoying the sight and sound of her wife speaking a foreign language. "Very good."

Then they went to Rachel; a German tourist who's the best in martial arts. Then to Sammy; a fellow doctor who's their field doctor. Then there's Jake; their diver and electronic expertise. And then Max; their shooter, best in the field. They all practiced their personas as it is required and they have to be very careful since they will not be bringing ammunition, just their natural strengths.

Y/N's leg was bouncing and she was biting her nails. A habit she has whenever they start an operation. Their plane just landed in Sudan. People are starting to get off, but they decided to wait for everyone to go down before they will. Ari noticed her. His big, callous hand reached hers and stopped her from biting it. She tilted her head to see him lightly smile at her. He intertwined their hands and placed it on his lap, drawing circles on her thumb. Y/N took a deep breath and tried to calm herself.

The line to customs was long. She went in front of Ari. Max and Sammy were done. Y/N was in the same row as Rachel but Jake was taken to their office. She glanced at Rachel but she timidly shrugged. Customs was quick for her but they took a longer time with Ari.

"Is that your wife?" The officer asked him and pointed at her.

Ari glanced at her and nodded. "Yes, we're celebrating our anniversary."

The officer looked at them and stamped his passport. Y/N sighed when he did. Ari took her hand and started walking but a known CIA agent passed by them. She forgot who he was.

"Mr. Thomas," He called Ari.

Ari turned with her. "Walton Bowen," He confirmed, pointing his passport with him.

"You're back," He said, looking at you. "With company."

"Yes," Ari placed his arm around her. "Walton, this is my wife, Charlotte. Honey, this is Walton Bowen, he works in the U.S. Embassy."

Walton Bowen, right. The guy who's undercover for years now. She remembered her dad telling her that they sent him to monitor Sudan and for the operations to be off the grid. Y/N shook his hand and smiled. "It's nice to meet you, Mr. Bowen."

Walton took his time to answer, trying to remember who she was. "It's nice to meet you."

"Back to study ancient civilizations?" He turned to Ari. "Can I offer you a ride somewhere?" He asked as they glanced at Rachel passing by them.

"No, no, we're all set, thank you though. Good to see you though," Ari immediately pulled her before she could say goodbye. He called the guy who was picking them up and left Bowen's sight.

"What should we do?" Y/N whispered, walking towards the car.

"Just get in the car," He murmured.

"We can't leave him there."

"Just get in the car," He enunciated, taking her bag, and placing it inside.

They got inside the car and drove. Luckily, they saw Jake lining up behind Sammy. Both of them took a sigh before chuckling at each other. They headed for the Ministry of Tourism to lease the resort. They haven't done that since they'll want cash not checks. And they have to see his face for important purposes. They got seated inside the minister's office. A spacious green-colored office with a large portrait of the president on the left and masks hanging on the back of the minister.

The minister started browsing their brochure which she made. He placed it down and smiled at them. "This is beautiful."

Y/N did not respond. She let Ari do all the talking. She remained seated with her hands clasped and leg crossed. She was blankly staring at her and casually glancing at Ari.

"President Nimeiry would be delighted. He understands the benefits of a thriving tourist economy for the people of Sudan," Minister nodded. Ari smiled in return and looked at the portrait before shooting her a glance.

He smiled. "We couldn't agree more."

The minister looked at Y/N. She lightly smiled. "So, no kids?"

"We're getting there," Y/N chuckled.

"The price—"

Y/N looked at Ari when he heard a gunshot. Another after another. It messed with her. Who was getting shot? Who are they killing? Why are they killing? 

"—Is 500 thousand dollars."

"I thought we agreed on 250," Ari glanced at her. "When we spoke on the phone with the Embassy we... we agreed on 250."

Madibbo's face went blank. "The price—"

Another shot.

"Has always been 500."

All of the shots made her stand up and walk to the window. "What the hell is that?"

She was an inch close from opening the curtain when the minister laughed. "I wouldn't do that if I were you."

"President Nimeiry has many enemies. Now he has a few less," Madibbo joked but they didn't laugh.

Y/N looked at Ari; his eyes pleading, full of worry. She gulped and took a deep breath before sitting down. She felt her stomach tie in a knot from disgust. Her face scrunched up when he said that. 

Ari inhaled sharply, sighs, then pulled out an envelope full of cash. That's what they love: Money. "Well," He said, placing it on the table. "350's our best offer. We can write it down as 250 and you can take the rest and do something beneficial for the people of Sudan."

She gulped while looking at Madibbo and the money when he took his time to answer.

"You may not speak Arabic, Mr. Thomas," He bobbed his head. "But you do speak the local language," He laughed heartily.

Ari laughed with him. He looked at her and started to worry when he saw her face getting pale.

"Of course, this does not include the staff salaries," Madibbo informed, standing up to get liquor behind the mask.

"Fine. Fine," Ari replied. 

Y/N raised her head. "What staff?" She whispered but Ari just shrugged.

They went on to toast the Red Sea diving resort after that they got straight into the car that Ari will drive to go to the resort. She's in the car with Ari and Sammy. The drive to the resort took a couple of hours and it was exhausting and hot. Finally they arrived at the resort. All of them settled in the front and looked at it.

"It sure doesn't look like the brochure," Max said.

All of them looked at him and he shrugged. They all got inside and looked around. It was dirty to say the least— hot and dirty. Bugs everywhere, black water, and dust on top of everything. 

Y/N went out the back to look at the beach. Ari settled their bags then followed her. "What do you think?"

She squinted at him, wearing her sunglasses that they got matching. "It's beautiful."

It really was. The beach was magnificent; clear blue sea against the deep blue creating beautiful waves, the endless mountains added perfection to it. The hotel can be cleaned up to look exactly like the brochure. 

"Hey, guys!" Rachel yelled. "This paper from this week."

Max then yelled. "Hey, yo! This fish is fresh."

Both of them knotted their eyebrows in confusion and went inside the dining room. Y/N pointed out the ashtray. "This is new."

Ari was supposed to reply but someone ran outside the door hitting Y/N. She immediately ran towards him but was grabbed by Ari's big, muscular arms. "Stay here!"

She saw all of them run in one direction following Ari but Y/N mouth fell on the floor. Stay there?! She's not a kid. Y/N ran to them and saw people; lots of people.

"Hi," Y/N said to them, waving, panting from the run. "I'm Charlotte, this is Guy. We're the new owners of this hotel."

None of them responded to her. All of them stared at Max's spear gun. "Max, lower that thing," Ari said. "Come on."

"Abu Hamid," Their leader, she thinks, said.

Y/N and Ari greeted her. She smiled at them, especially at the girl wearing the hijab. 

"What the hell is going on?" Sammy quietly asked. 

"I think we just met the local staff," Ari replied.

The staff got introduced and all of them met in the common area. Y/N had planned out that this will be a functioning resort to be a front for the extraction. They all cleaned the hotel and when night fell, she was tired. So tired that she hasn't got any chance to eat. The team decided their rooms; Rachel was on the far right, Jake beside the staff's room; Max beside the front door; Sammy beside the back door. 

"Okay, so I get the room next to Rachel's?" Y/N asked. 

Ari crossed his arms. "We have to stay in one room."

She raised her brow, mouth agape from his statement. Y/N looked at their mates stifling their laughs. "Why is that?"

"Honey," Ari called her, adoringly. "We're married."

"We're fake married here!" Y/N exclaimed, throwing her hands in the air in disbelief.

"Well," Ari chuckled and pointed his finger. "Technically, we're still married."

Y/N grunted. Their friends bursted into laughter. Ari stifle his laughter but the joy was evident in his eyes when he raised his head to look at her. Y/N stood up and walked to their shared room. She looked back to call Ari. "You better sign my divorce for this."

The husband did not like that. He clenched his jaw, his hands balled into a fist, and slammed it into the table when he knew she was inside. Max whistled to tease him. He shot him a look and his whistle died down.

"You were a jerk huh," Rachel smirked.

He looked at her to stop. Ari decided to call it a night. Y/N knocked the door off and revealed a dusty, grimy, cold room. Luckily, she brought everything to make a functioning hotel. In less than an hour, Y/N turned it into a hotel room; a five star hotel room. Y/N fired up scented candles that she always brought, she had a mini solar lamp that he placed on a stool to act as a nightstand, and she sprayed her lavender scented room spray.

After the room makeover, she changed  into a nightgown. She took a relaxing shower, sprayed perfume, lathered lotion all over her body, and wore her eye mask for a relaxing sleep. The day was exhausting and she decided to let the bed eat her and take her to dreamland.

>>Part 2<<

[courtzlou07]

Wind in my hair

Jj maybank x femreader

Fluff

1000 + words

Y/N'S POV

I a lot of things about JJ, like his hair, baby blue eyes and his love for the pogues and I, but my favourite thing to do with JJ is ride his motorbike. My parents never really liked the idea of my riding around with JJ on a motorbike but after lots and lots of begging I convinced them.

The first time JJ took me on the bike he picked me up from my house and promise my parents that he would look after me they seemed a bit more relaxed after that. I sat on the bike behind him and he put his helmet on me (he only had one and he wanted me to be safe) and started up the engine waved my parents goodbye and sped off. The second we took off I put my arms around his waste and held on for dear life until we got to John B's, let's just say I told him I was never doing that again.

About a week later I had finished my shift at the wreck and JJ was picking me up, I walked out the door to see my blonde headed boyfriend leaning against his bike.

"I told you I wasn't going on it again" I spoke as I walked over to him.

"Well I thought you could try it once more and if you really don't like it you don't ever have to ride it again" he smiled at me and kissed my lips quickly. I rolled my eyes and agreed with a "fine" and hoped on the back.

This time he went slower, he didn't speed off and didn't make me wear a head because there want anyone around. I had my head against his back and arms around his waist with my eyes squeezed shut but after a while I loosened my grip and sat up to let the wind blow through my hair.

"See it's not that bad right. I guess I should of went slow the first time" JJ said as I closed my eyes and let the mist of the ocean hit my face as we drove past it. JJ looked back at me and smiled at how happy I was doing something he loved. Once we got to the chateau I was beaming I couldn't wait to get back on, drive all the roads and go all over the island.

So from that day on JJ and I went for a ride and everyday no matter the weather it didn't matter if it was just from work to home or from john B's to work it was our time. It's been 2 years since that day and I even got my own helmet that JJ bought me for my 17th birthday that had Y/N Maybank writen on the back (it was definitely my favourite present). Today JJ is taking me on a date for our 3 year anniversary and he's said he had a surprise.

--------------------

When I got home from work I went up to my room and got ready. I was dressed in a black bikini (because he said it was at the beach) a red crop top and denim shorts with black converse. I put on some light make up did my hair and waited for JJ. I heard him pull in my driveway, I ran down stairs waved bye to my parents and left.

"Hi baby" I said as I gave him a quick kiss

"Hi love, don't you look gorgeous" I smiled at his compliment and hopped on the bike. I put the helmet on and he started the bike.

we drove through cut to get to the beach, when we got there JJ had set up a tent with fairy lights hanging off it with snacks and some pillows and blankets inside the tent.

"Do you like it?" he asked with a shy voice. I turned around of hugged him as tight as I could.

"I love it baby its perfect" we walked over and sat down and started talking and eating. after a while we got up and went to get in the water I took off my shorts and top and ran into the water and JJ followed. we started splashing each other and playing in the water.

he pulled me in by my waist and put kiss on my lips, we stayed like that for a while just happy to be in each others arms. after a while we got out and sat looking up at the stars listening to the waves hit the sand. 

" y/n you know how I said I had a surprise for you" I look yup at him and nod with a confused face because I though the tent set up was the surprise.

"come with me" we got up and he lead me a bit down the beach, "close your eyes" I did as he said and waited for him to tell me to open them. once he did I opened my eyes to see and almost brand new dirt bike in front of me. 

"do you like it? I know its not brand new but its what I could afford.....if you don't like it you don't have to keep it ill just give it to-" I cut him off with a kiss  when we pulled away he had the biggest smile I've ever seen on his face.

" I love it, but now I cant ride with you"

" you can still ride with me baby but now you don't have to wait for me to go" i smiled at him and gave him another kiss.

" i love you so much"

" i love you more"

[yespleasetommyshelby]

Should've just asked - Part 2 - Oscar Diaz

One week, seven days, 168 hours, 10080 minutes, 604800 seconds, since he fucked everything up with y/n. Threw it all away because his own insecurities got the better off him, all because he didn't just ask.

He hadn't seen sad eyes since that day either, leaving him alone to stew in his own bubble of self pity. He hadn't left his home since that day, instead opting to send Cesar to the store when something was needed or delegating his Santo's jobs to other members. The bags that y/n and Sad eyes had left behind in the mall sitting against the wall opposite him, mocking him with their bright colours and smiling logos, he'd looked through them as soon as he'd gotten home, each one filled with balloons, banners, anything you would need to through a birthday, even a badge that read 'birthday king' in big bold letters.

Today was his birthday, his 26th, a day where he should've been out in the yard celebrating with one of his famous Santo's parties with the love of his life by his side but instead he was sat in an empty house, bar his younger brother, wallowing in a pit of self pity.

"You still sulking?" Cesar asked as he watched his brother stare at the blank space by his feet, interrupting his pity party.

"Fuck off." He muttered, reaching for the half smoked joint that had been abandoned in the ashtray an hour ago.

"It's been a week Oscar, you can't sit around moping all the time, yeah you fucked up, I get it, but sitting here isn't helping anything." Cesar sighed, this past week he'd seen a side of his older brother that he couldn't remember seeing before, sad and bitchy Spooky was not a pretty sight.

"You don't get shit." Oscar sighed as he lit his joint, breathing in the smoke before exhaling slowly. "I fucked up the best thing to ever happen to me, to us, I lost mi amor Cesar." He mumbled, his eyes filling with tears that he rapidly tried to blink back.

"I know, I know I've never had anything like what you and y/n have, how about we go to the mall? I need some new trainers for school." Cesar asked, watching Oscars face carefully.

"Can't you take your little groupie with you?" Oscar muttered, stubbing out his joint in the ashtray before leaning back and covering his eyes with his arm.

"Please Oscar, it'll help get your mind of shit." Cesar tried again, desperate to get Oscar out of the house and the hole he was currently wallowing in.

"Fine." He sighed, pulling himself up and heading towards the door, missing Cesar pull out his phone and send a quick text.

He's out.

-------

Just down the street y/n grinned as her phone dinged, the text she'd been waiting for finally coming through.

"Hey Sad eyes!" She called into the spare room where he had been staying for the last week, opting to stay and comfort the upset girl rather than spending nights in his own bed.

"What's up?" He asked as he opened the door, rubbing the sleep from his eyes.

"Were you seriously sleeping at 2 in the afternoon?" She asked with an amused smile. "Anyway, Cesar's managed to get Oscar out the house so I'm heading over there now, you coming?" She asked with a smile, excited yet nervous at the thought of seeing Oscar again.

"Yeah, yeah, I'm coming, just give me two minutes." The man grumbled before going back into the room.

Yes, y/n was still pissed about how Oscar had acted a week ago, calling her out for being a cheat in the middle of the mall after doing nothing more than planning his birthday. But at the same time the last week had been hell, she'd received multiple texts and missed calls from Oscar, all apologising for that day, for making a fool out of all three of them. No matter how badly he had embarrassed her that day he was still the only thing in her heart, the love of her life and she was determined not to throw it all away, they had fixed every other problem that had arose in their relationship and they was going to fix this too. Which is why her and Sad eyes were currently on their way to the Diaz household, ready to throw him the most surprising surprise party there ever was.

"Alright, you start to put the food out and I'll get started with the decorations." Y/n smiled as she went over to the bags sat against the wall, the same ones that her and Sad eyes had gotten at the mall. "I'm surprised he didn't throw this out." She mused, digging through the bags to find the balloons.

"I've told you, the guys borderline obsessed with you." Sad eyes laughed from the kitchen.

An hour later and everything was set up, banners covered the walls, balloons floated through the house and yard alike while the food and drinks tables looked immaculate, thanks to Ruby's help.

Everything was in full swing, music blasting, drinks in people's hands as she received yet another text that she was waiting for.

2 minutes out.

"Alright! Everyone be quiet, he's just coming!" Y/n yelled, the music being cut and the loud laughter turning to hushed murmurs as her nerves grew knowing Oscar was just about to walk through the doors.

The loud slamming of the front door caught everyone's attention as they stood anxiously waiting for the Santos leader, the faint 'what the fuck is this?' Making her chuckle only being able to imagine how confused Oscar must have looked right then.

"Surprise!" Everyone cheered as Oscar and Cesar appeared at the back door, Cesar sporting a grin as Oscars wide eyes roamed the crowd before landing on y/n.

"You did this?" He asked quietly, not yet making a move as his mind tried to decide whether this was real, if she really was stood right in front of him.

"Well." She smiled bashfully. "I had some help." She shrugged as Sad Eyes came from round the corner with two coronas in his hands.

"Happy birthday Spooky." He smiled, holding a bottle out for Oscar to take, smiling and clinking their bottles together once Oscar took one.

"Aye, listen man, I'm, uh, I'm sorry about hitting you, the other day." Oscar sighed, feeling weird having to apologise for punching someone who was basically his brother.

"No worries Spook." Sad eyes chuckled patting his brother on the shoulder. "Now go get your girl." He smirked, nodding towards y/n who was stood a few feet away talking to Cesar and Jamal.

"Hey, uh, can we talk?" Oscar asked walking up to her and rubbing the back of his neck from the nerves.

"Yeah, sure." She smiled, feeling her heart beating through her chest as she looked up into his eyes.

They were both stood staring at each other before Cesar clearing his throat pulled them out of whatever trance they were in.

"Hey Jamal how about we go find Ruby?" Cesar asked, raising his eyebrows at Jamal who just didn't seem to get the hint.

"What? Why? We see him all the time." The young boy shrugged, oblivious to the scowls he was receiving from the Diaz brothers and the amused look from y/n.

"Beat it." Oscar deadpanned, smirking as Jamal quickly turned and walked away leaving Cesar to follow with a chuckle.

"Was there any need for that?" Y/n giggled as she turned back to Oscar, looking up at him with an amused glint in her eye.

"Kid doesn't know when to take a hint." Oscar shrugged, not seeing the issue in how he spoke to Jamal in the slightest.

"Yeah well, he is Jamal." Y/n shrugged with a laugh. "Anyway, what was it you wanted to say?" She asked remembering why the Santo had come to her in the first place.

"I uh, I just wanted to say I'm sorry, ya know, for blowing up on you the other day, I know how stupid I was being and I called you out for bullshit you didn't even do." Oscar sighed, his hand that wasn't holding his beer clenching and unclenching at his side as he tried to find the right words. "Just uh, just the thought that you were out with some other cabrón made me see red, I didn't even think to ask, I just wanted to punch whoever it was in the face." He spoke quietly, y/n only just hearing him over the music that had started up again.

"Oscar, you're right, it was stupid." She snorted making Oscars heart drop his eyes going straight to the floor, it was too late. "But." She started, making his eyes flick back up to her immediately. "But I love you Oscar Diaz, I love you so fucking much that this last week has been killing me. I don't know what to do when I'm not with you Oscar, and I don't ever want to have to do that again." She sighed, a lone tear a sliding down her cheek which he quickly reached up to wipe away.

"I love you too mi amor, I know I get jealous and over protective but that's only because I don't want any one taking you away from me, not now, not ever." He mumbled shaking his head slightly before putting his bottle down on the nearest table.

"I know, baby, I know." Y/n smiled, reaching up taking his face in her hands, thumbs rubbing along his jawline gently. "You know if the roles were reversed I would've done much more to any hyna I thought was coming for you." She giggled, already having thrown hands with one before.

"Trust me, I remember, that shit was hot." Oscar chuckled, wrapping his arms around her waist as hers slid from his face to going around his neck, opting to rub the bottom of his neck rather than jaw line.

"Now what?" Y/n asked, her eyes flickering between his.

"What do you want?" Oscar asked quietly, not wanting to push her into anything that she didn't want.

"What do I want? I want you Oscar Diaz, I want you everyday for the rest of my life, jealousy and temper included." She laughed as he rolled his eyes sarcastically.

"Good." Oscar smirked down at her. "Because I ain't never letting you go." He whispered, pulling her towards him, leaning down and planting his lips on hers for the first time in a week.

"I love you Oscar." She mumbled happily, resting her head on his chest as his arms wrapped around her back.

"I love you too mi amor." He smiled, placing a kiss on her forehead and squeezing her tight.

"Also, watching you punch sad eyes in the face really turned me on." She mumbled with a laugh as she felt Oscar tense slightly.

"Is that right?" He chuckled, looking down at her. "Well it's been a week, we best take care of that." He laughed before pulling away and lifting her over his shoulder before heading into the house landing a swift smack to her backside.

"Woo! Spookys gunna get some!" Was heard as he carried her through to the bedroom, both of them laughing as he threw her onto the bed.

"You're so perfect mi Reina." Oscar whispered leaning over her as he stroked a few stray hairs out of her face.

"If anyone's perfect here it's you." Y/n smiled letting her eyes wonder his beautiful features. "Just promise me something." She mumbled after placing a quick peck to his lips.

"Anything." He answered immediately, ready to give anything and everything to make her happy.

"Next time, just ask." She giggled as he rolled his eyes.

"Putá." He mumbled as he leaned down for a slow kiss.

"But you love me anyway." She whispered.

"Always mi amor."

One week without seeing each other.

Seven days without so much as a smile.

168 hours without a kiss.

10080 minutes without an 'I love you'.

604800 seconds without each other.

One surprise party to fix it all.

[eartht137]

DEAREST HEART- Letter One

Okay, For The Better has got me at a standstill. Every time I go to write the next chapter, I get a very "bad" idea and I have to write it in to meld with what I have in mind, but as my birthday is approaching in 2 days and Halloween is quickly approaching, I have developed a very new and delicious idea. I thought up this story in the shower. Hear me out, okay? The blinds that cover the window in my bathroom fell, and I mean fell from the wall, so I had to take a shower in the dark with a candle. Well it gets pretty muggy in my bathroom, as there's not a lot of room, so I opened the window to get some air, well with the wind blowing and the leaves rustling I kinda got that weird feeling that someone was watching me (which I highly doubt). In this story the character/you are a new wife and mom and you've been unmotivated to do normal chores and upkeep due to de pression and anxiety. I kinda wanted to touch on some real topics that I felt may resonate as I've noticed there is a lot of depression and anxieties that have been major high and I just wanted to send a small message that you are seen, you are heard, you are worthy, you are loved. Even if it is in your own world, I'd rather have my own world that I can escape to and have things go my way than keep taking on the pressure of things we deal with everyday. Also this is another Dark Clark Kent. I know, I know, the idea of the man just does something to me. So with that curvies, I present to you Dearest Heart. Okay rant over for the day. Please proceed..........oh yeah MMMMMMmwwwwwwaaahhhhhhh

Dark Clark Kent x Plus Size Reader

Warnings: Non Con, somnophilia, masturbation, stalking, mentions of impregnation. Maybe other things too. MINORS DNI!!!

You were getting up and ready for work, since starting your new job, you'd found yourself a bit out of balance. Being a new wife and mom, trying to adjust, you'd found yourself falling in and out of a reel of depression and anxiety. You very rarely had the energy or drive to clean and sometimes your depression got you to a point where you didn't really want to keep up your hygiene. Finally, you'd gotten the burst of life you needed and decided to make use of it while you had the drive. You started keeping up your hygiene as you used to and cleaned your house day by day. You started cherishing more moments with your husband and son. You had noticed the more you took effort within the day, it helped you feel a bit better everyday. One day, you stepped outside to get a breath of fresh air and sunlight. As you were getting ready to head back inside, you saw a letter place neatly on the bars of you security door with small rose. You tilted you head in confusion and looked around. You took the letter, seeing that it had "Dearest Heart' written beautifully across the front. You walked inside while admiring the vintage parchment envelope.

"Baby?" Your husband asked curiously, making you look up and smile as he and your son watched you.

"Well I think the mailman left someone else's mail-again." You sighed tossing the letter down on the table by your door. You went over and spent the remainder of you free time with your husband and son before heading into your office and logging on for work.

On your first break, you rushed out of your office hoping to spend time with your loved ones. You giggled as you watched your husband and son sleep with their mouths wide open on your couch. You were about to step into the bathroom when you got the nagging urge to go back and look at the letter again. You stared at it from across the room a moment before finally giving in to curiosity and grabbing it. You studied it for a moment before your husband adjusting on the couch startled you. You quietly went to the bathroom and examined the letter. Looking at your phone, you realized you didn't have much time, and would just open it to see what it looked like inside. A very hopeful side of you prayed that in your head that it was filled with cash that some good saint just felt in their heart to give, but you knew that was a slim chance. When you opened the letter, you almost gasped, almost like a child feeling as if you if you'd just done something forbidden. The alarm on you phone vibrated and you jumped, the letter dropped from you hands. You laughed a bit at yourself, picked up the letter, tucked it away and went back to work.

One your lunch break, after making something to eat for yourself and your hungry boys, you found yourself practically lured back to the bathroom to find the letter you'd tucked away for later. You opened it and pulled out a very beautifully written letter, but the first line damn near made your heart stop. You read it over and over trying to make sure you weren't seeing things, but there it was in black in, your name. You took a deep breath and continued reading the letter.

My Dearest Y/n,

I promised myself I wouldn't try to interfere in your life, but my heart won't let my stand idly by. I know this is abrupt as you've never seen me in your life, at least you don't remember meeting me, its been so long ago; but I can't keep quiet about this anymore as my love for you has yet to subside. I know it sounds unbelievable, but I swore I'd never lie to you and I am a man of my word. You might be a little worried as to how I know you, where you live-but you'd be shocked at how much I know about you and it'd scare you to know how long I've watched over you. Little love, I've been a bit disappointed in you. You allowed yourself to get to far down and instead of talking it out, you've been bottling everything in. We both know how that ends. You can talk to me if you need to, but I was really disappointed in how you allowed things to get. You weren't getting out of bed, you weren't keeping your hygiene up, and you weren't keeping the house up; on top of that, you haven't been utilizing any of your self-care tools. You didn't leave the house for a month and you cried every night by yourself because you're too stubborn to get out of your own head for two seconds and let the people who love you in. You were also finding a new lie every week to call into to work, that was disappointing darling because you don't have to lie, just tell them you need a day for your health, you don't owe them anymore explanation than that, but I don't want you to lie again. Do you remember those 2 weeks your backside was sore and stinging and you couldn't figure out why? I'm so sorry dear heart but I had to light a fire in you some way, and I just can't allow you to behave in such a way. I also can't stand to see the woman I love not take care of herself. On another note, I do want to tell you how proud of you I have been with how much you love and care for our son. He's growing so big isn't he? Oh darling, I know you think he's your husbands, but I guarantee he is my flesh and blood, why do you think he stares at me so long when he sees my photo pass your screen. His blood is my blood, he knows who he is. I have decided dear heart, to be a bit more active in your life as I have come to realize that my standing by protecting in the shadows is not enough. It will be awhile my love, but one day we will be together. You, Me and our son. I love you both so much, I promise you we will be a family as we should one day. For now I will continue to watch from the distance and protect you when you need me. I will also be there to talk whenever you just want to talk out loud. Before I end this letter, I want to also tell you how proud I am that you've started writing. I love the stories you've been writing about me and I promise to fulfill every one of you desires as soon as the time is right. Only this time, you'll be able to enjoy it as much as I have. I will be writing again, you don't have to reply, but it would be nice. Keep up the good work sweetheart, I love you.

With All My Heart and Soul,

Kal-El

Your heart pounded in your ears, you forgot to breath and tears filled your eyes. You kept trying to convince yourself it was a prank, but the more you tried to deny it, the more you knew it was real. You sat thinking to yourself, when you'd written a story about him, you didn't know anyone named Kal-El. You immediately started walking around your house making sure every window and door was locked. You wanted to tell your husband, but once again the gut feeling told you not to, and you'd realized that your gut was really on point and that just made things scarier.

You finished you lunch break and the rest of that day unable to concentrate on anything. That night while you took a shower, you kept looking through the blinds to see if you'd see someone. On one had you wanted to see if there was someone really there and on the other you felt you'd probably shit yourself if you really saw someone. After a moment or two, you'd finally convinced yourself it was a sick prank and someone in the neighborhood was being an idiot. You laughed a bit and finished up, ready to finally get the sleep you'd been begging for all day. As you laid in bed, every noise made you jump. Every time something or someone would move, you'd go from the precipice of sleep to fully awake. You had been feeling watched for the longest time and you'd just blamed it on being crazy, but now with the letter confirming your nightmare, you really had no idea what to do. Your mind ran and ran until it finally shut itself down and you drifted off to a very peaceful sleep despite everything going on around you.

He sat in the corner of your dark room watching you breath calmly. He wanted so badly to go over and rock you to sleep as he watched you struggle to fall asleep, but he couldn't present himself to you just yet, not until everything was perfect the way we wanted it before he showed himself.

He sat there watching you from the other side of the room knowing that soon you'd throw the covers off of your plush body exposing your luscious curves that he loved feeling in his large hands. His hand stroked himself as he thought back to the first night he took you. You were sleeping so good, you didn't hardly move. His released his hard thick cock from their restraints and pumped himself as he watched your breasts rise and fall with your breathing. He thought back to the first time he tasted your nipples, how hard they got when he kissed and nipped them. How wet you got for him and how he once made you cum from playing with them only. He then thought about how delicious you were. His fist moving faster and rougher down his shaft. He remembered how tight you were when he first fucked you. How hot and juicy you were as he pumped deep into your soft pussy filling you with every inch of him. He wanted to ruin you, and he wished you could see the happiness he felt when you couldn't cum one night from yours or your husbands touches. His hand pumped faster as he remembered fucking you so good one night your orgasm woke you as you came, as disappointed as he was that he couldn't feel you cum around him, he was still proud to have your body so responsive for him. That sent him over the edge and he came hard wanting so badly to empty inside of you. He wanted to see you round with his baby again, but he wanted to allow you the time to fully heal. He used one of your husbands shirts to wipe himself clean, and he gave you a soft peck on the lips, smiling when you turned away.

"I love you so much. I promise things will be right soon. Sleep well dearest heart." He whispered before leaving. He couldn't wait until you found his next letter.

[maddiwrites]

Secret Lives (Part 2)

Paring: JJ Maybank x reader 

Summary: You and JJ never got along so your friends trap the two of you on a boat in the middle of the marsh to work it out. Only it doesn’t go as planned. (Part 2)

Note: I couldn’t be happier with the feedback I am getting from Part 1!! Thank you guys so much for helping me out and hanging on there with me as I figure all of this out! I’m so grateful for all the comments and messages and I am ready every single one! Now I saw a couple people asking to be a part of a tag list...so if someone could tell me how to set one of them up I would be more than happy to lol. I will tag the two people I’ve seen who asked to be tagged! But yeah, am I supposed to set something up for a tag list or do people just message me if they want to be tagged in my stuff? Someone let me know!! 

Word Count: 5.6k

Warnings: Language, angst, small parts of child abuse. 

Part 1

It’s been about two weeks since you’ve seen or talked to the Pogues. Everyday felt ten hours longer and the air felt thinner. You missed your friends. You missed surfing with John B, you missed debating about the accuracy of medical TV shows with Pope, you missed sleepovers with Kie, and yes, you even missed JJ. 

As much as you hated yourself for it, you knew you did the right thing. Staying with the Pogues would have caused more harm than good. It was clear as day that you and JJ would never get along because he didn’t like you and you weren’t going to stand around and be insulted by a guy you still can’t help but think about every single day. 

Every night, you pictured the hatred behind JJ’s blue eyes when he spoke about you being nothing but a spoiled brat who didn’t deserve his trust or your friendship with the other Pogues. Each word felt like an individual stab to the heart. You were use to people not liking you. The girls at your school hated you for not giving them the time of day, the boys threw hurtful remarks at you all the time after you rejected them. But they never hurt as much JJ’s. Because they didn’t come from the guy you loved. 

It didn’t matter how much JJ hated you. You couldn’t help but fall for his sparkling blue eyes, tan skin, and fluffy blonde hair. You swooned every time JJ laughed and smiled because you loved seeing him happy. You were turned on every time JJ stood up for one of your friends, threatening to fight whoever it was that was bothering them, even if it was an uptight Kook. You were silently heartbroken every time JJ told you and his friends about his sexcapade from the previous night.  You were concerned and personally infuriated when JJ would come to the Chateau with new sets of bruises without telling you where they came from because that little voice inside your head told you exactly where they were from. 

You loved him, and you hated that you loved him. 

But this was for the best. At least thats what you told yourself.

Kie didn’t agree though. She found you in your room the next day, ready to apologize for stranding you on a boat with JJ, but it just ended in another screaming match when you told her what happened. 

“So just like that? You’re gonna leave?” She yelled. 

“I can’t do it anymore, Kie! He doesn’t want me there, and I am so sick and tired of trying to get him to like me.”

“What about John B and Pope? What about me? You’re our friend too!”

“We can still hangout -”

“Without JJ? That’s so unfair!”

“He hates me, Kie! How would you like it if I forced you to hang out with Sarah Cameron, huh?”

“That’s not the same.”

“Its the exact fucking same, and you know it!”

Kie ended up storming out of your room, neither one of you feeling any sort of peace or satisfaction with your decision. You haven’t talked to her since, and you contemplated calling her every day. 

But you never do.

The alarm you set on your phone blared in your ear from the pillow next to your head - a reminder that you needed to leave to pick up your father. You slapped the touch screen of your phone until the stupid alarm turned off. The last place you wanted to be was anywhere outside of your room. The thought of being with you father, the man you continued to blame for all your problems, filled you with self-hatred. You hated how easily he was able to manipulate you to help him, making you and your mother out to be the bad guys. He used Andrew’s wealth as a guilt trip for you, saying that since you didn’t do anything to deserve his money, the least you could do was help him out because you and your mother left him with absolutely nothing. And you fall for it. You fall for it every single time because he says you use to be daddy’s little girl - that he had big plans for the two of you when you were old enough to learn life’s pleasures. Little did you know his biggest life pleasures had always been drugs, alcohol, and gambling.

You tied your hair up in a messy bun and bounced down the stairs. Swiftly, grabbing the car keys to your new Mercedes Andrew bought you for your sixteenth birthday, you sped walked past your little sister who tried showing you a new trick that she taught your maltese puppy.

“Look, Y/N/N!”

“Not now, Gracie,” You huffed. 

As you drove through the Cut, you couldn’t help but keep a lookout for your Pogues.  You tried not to slam on the brakes every time you caught a glimpse of blonde hair or swerve when you saw a guy John B’s height carrying a surfboard. 

You honked your horn twice when you pulled up to your dad’s shitty apartment. After no longer being able to pay his mortgage after your mom left him, he had no choice but to move into the cheapest apartment in OBX. He always tried telling you that was your fault too. 

A few minutes later, he walked out, looking like he hasn’t showered in days or knows how to change his socks.

He slid into the passenger seat with a grunt, barely passing you a second glance. “You’re late.” He said. 

You stayed quiet, knowing that anything you said would only piss him off even more since you weren’t in the mood to put up with his antics.

You drove him to his drug dealer’s house, parking outside of the one story home that looked like it was rotting from the inside out. Your dad made you take him here a couple times. Every time you stayed in the car. But today, your father had something different planned.

“Come on,” He said.

“What?” You looked at him with your brows pinched together in confusion. 

“I need you inside.”

“No, no, no, no. That wasn’t the deal.”

“Well it is now, so let’s go.” His voice was stern through his clenched teeth, his eyes unblinking. You stared at him for a long second, debating whether fighting with him was worth it. 

Without another word, you reluctantly opened your door and followed your dad into the house. It smelled like B.O and marijuanna, just like how you pictured a frat house would. Pots, pans, and plates were filled to the brim of the sink. A moldy meal that looked a couple days old sat at the round table tucked in the corner. 

Your dad lead you into the living room where three other men were sitting. Well two men and one boy you recognized immediately. You swallowed your nerves as they all turned to look at your dad, then you.

“What’d you bring me, today, Jerry?” The guy with the long black hair tied in a low bun looked at you like you were fresh meat. 

You took a small step closer to your dad, ironically looking at him for some kind of protection. You didn’t trust any of these men in this room. You didn’t care if they were your father’s friends. They were men who made poor life choices and you didn’t know how far they could take it.

You looked over at Rafe Cameron, who compared to these guys, looked like a lost kid in a carnival. He was sporting a black eye and jaw. He looked both shocked and scared to see you here, probably worried that you would torment his reputation by letting everyone know how he really spends his weekdays when he’s not partying on his daddy’s boat. Little did he know, he had just enough blackmail to use against you too. 

“This is my daughter, Y/N,” Your dad introduced you. “Y/N, this is Barry.”

Barry looked you up and down and smirked. “You look like you a part of Country Club’s world.” By the way he was pointing his thumb back at the Kook, you figured that was his nickname for Rafe.

“She is,” Your father answered for you. “Remember when you said you didn’t trust me to come up with enough money to pay you back for my blow? This is proof that I got it. That I’ll always have it.”

Bile rose up your throat and your heart twisted in your chest. Is this how your dad thought of you? An open wallet? 

Of course it is, you thought. 

Barry nodded, impressed that someone like you came from a man like your father. “Well, take a seat. Can I offer you anything? Beer? Soda? Maybe a whiff?” He pointed to the white line on his clear coffee table.

“No. Thank you.” You said slowly before looking up at your father. “I didn’t bring any cash...”

“Don’t worry sweetheart. I paid out this time - used the check you sent me for my water bill. But now Barry knows he can trust me with his shit - that I wasn’t lying about you.”

“Maybe you can help Country Club pass my shit around. You’ll get a nice discount if you do...and maybe something else,” Barry looked at you suggestively. 

“Don’t scare her off, dude, she just got here.” The other man said. He extended his arm out for you to shake his hand. “I’m Luke Maybank.”

In that moment, it felt like the whole world stopped turning. You stared at the man in front of you, drinking in all his features and matching them to JJ’s. Same blue eyes, sharp jaw line, and a perfect nose. You looked down at his hand as you hesitantly shook it. Dirty, dry, scuffed. You remembered the days and nights that JJ would limp into the Chateau. He would blame it on the Kooks but the details in his story never stuck, like he couldn’t remember them with each person he told.

“Maybank?” You repeated.

“Yeah,” He narrowed his eyes. “Do I know you?”

“I was friends with your son.” Just like that, you went from being nervous to being angry. You hated this man more than you’re own father. JJ didn’t deserve the beatings and the abuse from the man in front of you. He was nothing but a deadbeat dad who didn’t know how good his son really was to him. 

“I would have remembered a pretty face like yours.”

“He never brought me around your house,” You looked at Luke Maybank from his shoes to his face. He was wearing jeans with dirt stains on them, a fitted white tank underneath a grey and blue flannel that was ripped by the cuffs around his wrists. The bags under his eyes were as dark as the bruise on Rafe’s face and his chin was in need of a shave. “Wonder why.” You couldn’t stop the sarcasm that dripped from your tongue.

You wished you could say more, or spit in his face, or kick him where it hurts. You weren’t afraid of what would happen to you, but how he would take it out on JJ if you did.

You looked up at your dad. “I’ll wait in the car.”

You quickly walked out of the house, immediately taking in a deep breath of fresh air. Before you could hide away in the front seat of your car, Rafe called out for you to stop.

You turned, only because you didn’t know what he wanted.

“What?” You said.

“Tell your boys this isn’t over. They’re not going to get away with -”

“I’m sorry. What are you talking about?”

“The Pogues. They sunk Topper’s 2020 Malibu, 24-MXC.”

At least now you have an idea as to where his bruises came from. “Is that suppose to mean something to me?”

Rafe smirked. “I forgot. You’re not a natural born Kook.”

“And yet you and I are standing in the same douchebag’s yard. What a coincidence.”

Rafe sneered at you. If this were a cartoon, steam would be coming out of his ears. “Just tell them.”

When Rafe turned to walk back into Barry’s home, you called out to him. “How do you know it was them?” Rafe turned around. “What’s your proof?” He didn’t answer immediately, and you watched him wrack his brain for some bullshit lie, which gave you all the answers you needed. “I’m guessing there isn’t any but you think it was them because you gave them a good reason to sink Topper’s 2020 Mailbu, 24-MXC. A boat I know is the finest wake setter and number one in luxury, quality, and performance.” The only reason you knew that was because JJ would say it every time Topper and Sarah would cruise by you on the HMS Pogue, and the look on Rafe’s face made it worth every second having to listen to JJ repeat that almost every week.

If Rafe wanted to respond, he couldn’t, because your dad was now walking towards you with a mean mug on his face.

Before you could say anything, the back of your dad’s hand whipped you across the face. His wedding ring, the one he refused to take off for eighteen years, caught on the corner of your mouth, splitting your bottom lip.

Rafe jumped back, startled, and you bit back a scream. Your thumb skimmed over your lip, blood coating your finger. 

“Don’t embarrass me like that again. Got it?” You dad glared down at you.

“Sir...” Rafe’s voice shook with unease. If you weren’t silently shaking with shame, you would have been surprised that Rafe even said anything at all. 

“Trust me, kid. You don’t wanna get in between a quarrel between a dad and their kid,” Luke Maybank smirked as he made his way to his own truck that was parked in front of yours. 

You glared at the back window of the car, now shaking with both shame and anger. You knew there was nothing else you could do to change the way Luke treated his son. You knew you couldn’t stop him from hurting JJ. 

But it shouldn’t matter. Because JJ wasn’t your problem anymore.

                                                  ***************

The next morning your mom made you run her errands for her. A trip to the Cleaners to pick up Andrew’s suits, the pet store for dog food and treats, and lastly to Heyward's because, according to Gracie, he sells the best hot dogs she’s ever had. 

You were trembling with nerves as you stalked through the aisles. You kept your head down, focusing on finding everything on your mother’s list as quickly as possible so you could get the hell out of there. When you went to check out, Mr. Heyward studied you but didn’t say anything. Lord knows what Pope told him. You wouldn’t be surprised if he charged you extra just to make a point. 

“Thank you,” You said as he handed you the brown paper bag. 

He nodded silently. 

As you walked out of the store, you’re faced with three out of your four friends that you dreaded seeing. They were huddled together, whispering and bickering about something. When they heard the bell above the door chime, they all looked up at you. The four of you stood there like you had all just gone brain dead. Your mouth dried up and you forgot how to speak. 

Pope looked surprised to see you, like a ghost he wasn’t expecting to see. Kie looked glum, and you remembered your last conversation. You didn’t know what you were now. You couldn’t read JJ’s expression. His eyes are casted down on your face. He was staring at your lips. Your beautiful soft pink lips he’s dreamt about kissing for years. Now they were tainted and he was dying to know how, so he could wrap his hands around that bastard’s neck and set him straight. 

“Hi...” You said softly. You didn’t know what else to say. 

No one else had a chance to speak because the piercing noise of a police siren cut through the awkward tension. Officer Shoupe got out of his car and started approaching Pope of all people. 

"Morning Officer,” Pope said nervously.

Shoupe acted like he didn’t hear him. “I have an arrest warrant for felony of destruction of property.”

You instantly thought back to what Rafe said to you yesterday. Topper’s boat. How they’re not going to get away with it. 

You watched Shoupe with wide eyes as he told Pope to put his hands up. “Hands where I can see them.” Kie tried blocking Shoupe from getting any closer to Pope. “Young lady, out of my way.”

Heyward walked out of his shop when he heard the commotion. “You arresting my boy?”

Shoupe didn’t answer and forcefully pulled Pope’s hands behind his back. 

“Be careful!” Kie screamed at him. 

Everyone started screaming at Shoupe, trying to get him away from the boy who didn’t deserve this. Pope had a future ahead of him. One that didn’t involve relying on his parents money to get. He was a hard worker, stayed out of trouble, and even had a scholarship interview in a couple weeks that will be his one way ticket off this island. He couldn’t go to jail. It would ruin him. 

Your head started ringing as the people in front of you moved in slow motion. Rafe’s words repeated in your head - more importantly the words he didn’t say. He hesitated when you asked how they knew it was your friends. Because he didn’t know for sure. 

“Stop!” You screamed louder than anyone else, causing everyone to pause in their movements. Your friends looked at you with wide eyes and Shoupe narrowed his in suspicion. “Pope didn’t do it.” You couldn’t stop yourself from doing what you were about to do, but you knew it was better than Pope getting pushed down to the station. “I did it.”

“Y/N...” JJ started to say softly, but you cut him off. 

“You’re here for the Thornton’s sunken boat, right?” You continued, knowing that if you proved with some details that you were there, Shoupe would have no choice but to take you instead of Pope. “Pope didn’t do it. He wasn’t even with me when I did it.”

Shoupe shook his head. “Y/N, you don’t want to cover for -”

“I’m not covering. I was sick and tired of Topper and his friends always taking advantage of my friends, who do nothing but work their asses off to make sure families like mine can prop their perfectly painted toes up on some beach chairs and do nothing but lay in the sun all day. So I hit Topper where it hurt with something so replaceable as a boat because I know money is all that matters to that family.”

“Y/N, what the hell are you doing?” JJ said through clenched teeth. 

You shrugged. “What? I’m just telling the truth.” You took a deep breath and glanced at JJ one last time before focusing back on Shoupe. “You know my dad, Shoupe. And you know I’m not talking about Andrew. I mean, my real dad.” 

You tried to act like you didn’t just spill your biggest secret to really sell your story. You pretended like the eyes of all your friends weren’t burning holes in your head. 

Shoupe used to be the officer that would frequently visit your home when you lived with your dad. Neighbors would call the cops on your family a lot because the screaming got to be too much. Without your mom pressing charges, there was nothing he could do. 

“Yeah. Yeah, I know your dad,” Shoupe said softly, like he felt sorry for you that he knew exactly what you were talking about. 

“I guess I inherited his temper.”

“What?” Kie’s voice broke and tears started cascading down her cheeks. You forced yourself not to look at her. 

“I know you don’t have any proof that Pope did it. There’s no cameras posted around the Thornton’s dock.” You knew that because Sarah made you hang out with their friends a couple of times on that boat. “And there were no witnesses.” You were banking on Rafe’s reaction for this one. “So I’m guessing the Thornton’s, most likely the Mrs., paid you or something to make the arrest. But I don’t think the Sheriff would appreciate you taking someone who you have no evidence against in instead of someone confessing to the crime right to your face.”

You didn’t blink when you stared Officer Shoupe down, challenging him to go against you and fight his way to Pope. But both of you knew he couldn’t take Pope after this. 

“Is this true?” Shoupe looked at Pope.

“Yes -”

“Not you! I’m asking Pope,” Shoupe snapped, glaring at you. You knew you just ruined his entire day. 

Pope looked at you for some kind of answer. You tried subtly nodding your head, telling him it’s okay to agree. You wanted him to say it was true. 

You didn’t know what was coming next for you, but you knew you could handle it. You didn’t know if Pope could.

“Yes, sir,” Pope said.

JJ felt like he was punched in the gut. He didn’t want Pope to go to jail, but he sure as hell didn’t want you going there either. He wanted to tell you he was sorry, that he was an idiot, that he tried not to love you but failed. He knew he treated you like shit and he pushed you away. Yet here you were, still taking bullets for each of them. 

Shoupe nodded and began reading your Miranda Rights. You handed Heyward your groceries and said, “I’ll have someone pick these up.”

“Wait!” JJ tried calling out to you as Shoupe helped you into the back seat of his car. “Wait! No!”

You kept your head down as Shoupe drove away, only looking up when you knew you were at least a mile away from your friends. 

As Shoupe closed the door to a room where you were to wait to be interrogated, you smiled to yourself. Your mom was going to be pissed, you were about to get in a shit load of trouble, and the Pogues still may never talk to you again, but you knew you just saved Pope’s entire future - the one he deserved more than anything. 

And you were proud of yourself for that.

                                                   ***************

Of course Mrs. Thornton didn’t want you to go to jail. She wanted about $30,000 of restitution money to make up for it. You rolled your eyes when you heard that. All that family cares about is money. You knew she probably didn’t even care about the boat in the first place. 

Your mom screamed at you the entire ride back to your house. She took your phone and TV away and threatened to homeschool you for the next school year. Your mom was strict but her punishments never lasted long. She usually caved somewhere in the first week. You think its because she thinks your childhood was punishment enough and that behavior like this was to be expected because of it. You tried not to get that mentality stuck in your head, but sometimes you could get yourself into some trouble here and there. 

Another part of your punishment was to do the yard work around the house. Andrew had already written you a list by the time your mom forced you to wake up at 6 a.m.

You couldn’t even be mad at the punishment. Mulching the yard was the least you could do. Andrew even planned on paying the Thornton’s back if you worked for him for free the rest of the summer. 

It was about mid morning when a car pulled up your driveway. You felt like the wind was just knocked out of you when you noticed the junky Volkswagen van park. 

JJ hopped out of the Twinkie and walked in your direction. You didn’t know what to do. Were you supposed to say hi and pretend like nothing ever happened between you two? Would you go back to bickering? You looked down at your body and was mortified at what you were wearing. Although it was only some black leggings and a white tank top, you were covered in dirt and sweat, and reeked of cow manure, which you knew was what mulch was made out of. 

You tried pushing away the butterflies that swarmed your stomach when JJ stood next to you. You turned to look at him, unsure of what to say. You hated that he had this effect on you. Usually you were quick witted and were able force any kind of small talk. I mean, you were a Kook now after all. But this felt different. You didn’t want to have small talk with JJ. You wanted to really know him. His past, his now, his future. You didn’t want to be tongue tied. 

“Hey,” He said softly.

“Hi,” You wiped the sweat off your forehead with the back of your gloved hand. You glanced back at the van, waiting for one of your other friends to appear. “What are you doing here?”

“You weren't answering your phone and I got worried,” JJ sheepishly tucked his hand in his pockets and had a hard time of meeting your eyes. 

Ever since you mentioned a dad with a bad temper, JJ couldn’t stop thinking the worst for you. When you weren’t answering your phone, he wondered if he had done something to hurt you. The thought made him so sick with anxiety, he drove to your house to make sure you were all right.

“Yeah, my mom took my phone away. Turns out she doesn’t like it when her daughter gets arrested.” You tried to joke. “Why were you worried?”

JJ finally looked at you again. “What happened to your lip?”

You coughed from the unexpected question. You reactively bit your bottom lip and looked away. “I uh, fell on Sarah’s boat the other day.”

“Y/N...” JJ said softly and touched your elbow to make you look at him. 

“What, JJ?” You snapped, turning to look at him with a glare. He probably put two and two together the second you mentioned your dad yesterday in front of him. Just like you did when you met Luke Maybank. You hated that you had this in common with the blonde Pogue, but you also knew he could be someone you could confide in, which is something you never had. “Why do you care? Just because you know about my dad now doesn’t make us friends.”

“I was wrong, okay? I was wrong about you, Y/N.”

You scoffed, “I have an asshole for a dad, JJ. Nothing else has changed.”

“I was the biggest dick to you. You tried every day to be my friend and I pushed you away. And I’m sorry. The truth is, I don’t like change and I don’t trust people because my dad -” JJ paused and looked away towards the road, unable to meet your eyes. 

“Because your dad’s just like my dad,” You said, making his head snap back to you. “I met your dad the other. It turns out they have the same drug dealer.”

“You met my dad?” JJ’s eyes went wide.

“Yeah.”

“Did you...”

“I didn’t say anything other than how we use to be friends. But trust me, there was a hell of a lot more I wanted to say.”

JJ nodded and rubbed the back of his neck. “Listen, you were right. I didn’t take the chance to get to know you because I was afraid that I would like you a lot more than I wanted to, and then you would realize you were too good for us...for me. So I pushed you away. I tried hating you so you would hate me too. But truth is, I never hated you. I could never hate you. You’re smart, funny, kind, beautiful...” Your eyes flickered up to meet his and you noticed a pink hue running up his neck, which probably matched the one on your cheeks. “I’ve always thought that. And I don’t care about where you came from. You could have been born and raised a Kook or you could have been homeless your entire life. Nothing could ever change my opinion of you. I like you, Y/N. And I miss you. The Pogues miss you and they hate me and I hate me too because I drove you away. And I’m so sorry.”

You couldn’t tell if this was a dream or not, but you weren’t going to mess this up, even if it was a dream. Because JJ was standing in front of you, telling you he missed you and that he wanted you back with him and his friends, and you’d be a fool not to take him up on that because you missed them too and you were miserable without them.

“I miss you too, JJ.”

JJ smile grew wide at your words and for a second, you thought he was going to jump up and down and cheer. “Really? You don’t hate me?”

You shook your head. “I never hated you, JJ. I never could.”

“You should.”

“No. I shouldn’t. I get why you didn’t want me around. I’m a Kook now and I was being shady when I tried hiding my dad from the rest of you. You were just protecting your friends.”

“Turned out they weren’t the ones who needed protecting,” JJ said softly.

You shook your head. “I don’t need protecting.”

“Why do you still see him if you live here now?”

“It’s complicated.”

JJ reluctantly nodded. He hated that this was a part of your life he couldn't exert himself into just yet. He had to earn that. He needed you to trust him first before you let him into such a vulnerable part of your life. But he understood that. He understood that more than anybody. 

But he was going to make sure John B kept his eyes on you. JJ knew you two were close.

“I won’t push you to tell me. But you can talk to me about it. I won’t judge you.”

“Thanks, JJ,” You said graciously. People say that all the time. You can talk to me. For the most part you never believe them. You think its just something people say to make them sound sincere. But with JJ it was different. You believed every word.

“Just promise me if you see him again to take someone with you. Like John B or something.”

“Okay,” You said. You didn’t know if you meant it because all you could think about was that JJ cared enough about you to be worried. 

“Okay...” JJ said awkwardly. “So we’re good? Friends?”

Your heart cracked at the ‘F’ word but you knew you were crazy to hope for anything else. You were lucky enough to even get called a friend. You bit down on your bottom lip as your grinned and nodded. “Friends.”

“Good,” JJ nodded. “So, I’ll see you soon?”

“Yeah, I’ll see you soon.”

“Okay...” JJ clapped his hands in front of him nervously. “Good. Then I’m just gonna...”

“Yeah, I should probably get back to...” You pointed back to the mulch.

“Bye, Sassy.”

You turned back to the mulch in your wheelbarrow and bit back the urge to squeal in delight, at least until the van pulled out of your driveway again. 

“Actually you know what?” JJ said, making you turn around. He was walking back over to you with a determined look on his face. “Screw friends.” 

“What -”

Before you could process what was happening, JJ cupped your cheeks and smashed his lips against yours. You instantly kissed him back and pulled him closer to you by fisting your hands into his shirt. The butterflies in your body transformed into a stampeded and your heart was hammering against your rib cage. 

You’ve kissed so many other guys before, but this one felt different. There was a passion behind this one - a meaning that felt so deep it could only be explained through actions. Kissing JJ felt right, like you had done this hundreds of times before. 

JJ pulled away first and rested his forehead against yours, his eyes trained on your swollen lips. His breath hit your face and your legs went weak in the knees. 

“I’ve wanted to do that for about two years.” He said.

“What took you so long?” You said, your eye lashes fluttered up to look at him.

“I didn’t know what I had until it was gone,” JJ said, looking up at you. He pulled away to look you in the eyes. “I love you, Y/N. And I understand if you don’t feel the same way but - “

You pulled him in for another kiss as fireworks exploded in your head. You didn’t want to let go of this moment. You couldn't believe that everything you wanted was happening.

“I love you too.”

JJ’s eyes lit up like lights on a Christmas tree as did his smile that widened with each second. He picked you up by your waist and spun you around. You giggled above him and beamed down at him. You’ve never felt this happy in your entire life.

When he set you down, he kissed you again. “Say it again.”

You pulled him in close enough for your faces to be nose to nose. “I. Love. You. JJ Maybank.”

JJ shook his head and chuckled. “Unbelievable.”

He kissed you again, and you didn’t care if you didn’t get the yard work done in time because you fulfilled your duty as a Kook. You officially have everything you could ever want. 

And you wouldn’t have it any other way.

Tags: @allycat449-blog @zarahsloves

[t0shii]

% pretty hands

.! timeskip! tsukishima, kageyama (sep) x gn!r

.! fluff, not proofread, mention of food in tobio's

.! this is like a pt 2 to my other "pretty hands" post, check that one out also!

tsukishima

it was common for you to sit or lay in tsukishima's lap while he read aloud for you. originally, he wasn't fond of reading out loud for you. he thought it was weird and awkward but one night when you just couldn't sleep, you'd asked him and he agreed, saying "if it'll help you sleep.... i guess so."

tonight was one of those nights, it was storming horribly and try as you might, you just couldn't sleep. tsukishima had grown irritated at your tossing and turning, "turn the lamp on, i'll get my book." you're not sure if you should be happy he's going to read to you or upset he's only doing so to stop you annoying movements, nonetheless the do as told, the now lit lamp beside your side of the bed just barely illuminates your room and you look to your boyfriend for further instructions. "c'mon then." he holds and arm out for you to climb under and you do just that, your own arms clinging to a penguin plush he'd gotten you at an aquarium a year ago.

he'd been reading for ten minutes and you still weren't budging. he pauses and takes a breath, "you sleepy yet?" you look away shyly, your answer barely audible "...no" he frowns at this, "i'll finish this chapter then find a different book." he mumbles, adjusting his glasses. truthfully, you hadn't been paying attention to the book at all, instead, your mind (and gaze) wandered to his hands instead, they were so pretty. pale and slender, worn-down baby blue nail polish on this nicely trimmed nails from where he'd let you, to your surprise, paint his nails one night many weeks ago and a dainty blue and white bead bracelet with your initials you'd made for him adorning his wrist, to which you had the match of with his initials instead.

he begins reading again but you can't stop looking at his hand- "so as he- what are you doing?" he looks at you confused as you take his free hand in yours, " kei, did you know you have really pretty hands?" you look up at him, "well... no? no one's ever told me that." his cheeks dust a light pink as you continue to inspect his hand, "well you do. they're so soft too, and way bigger than mine, look." you press the palm of your hand against his. of course he already knew his hands were bigger than yours, it didn't take much to notice the difference. you play with and compliment his hands for well over twenty minutes until your eyelids get droopy and eventually, you fall asleep. all this time, tsukishima never knew he had such pretty hands.

kageyama

it was routine that every tuesday evening you and kageyama had a little self-care night. face masks while taking a bubble bath together, movies, and of course take out from your favorite restaurant.

bubble baths were reserved for any thoughts or concerns the two of you needed vent out and the other would comfort you accordingly so. one thing to note about kageyama is that he's a hand talker not only this but his hands are beautiful (a compliment he's received from you many times before) as your boyfriend rants on about how his coach was making him sit out of a match they were having in a few days because his wrist was feeling off, he flicks some soap in your eye. really, you hadn't meant to be so dramatic with your, "AH tobio, be careful!" and you almost felt bad as he curses at himself. "oh shit, baby i'm sorry." he blows gentle, cool air onto your eye, "is it better?" after making sure his hands were free of soap, he gently rubs his thumb over your eye, "no, it stings really bad, tobi." you pout.

even with only one eye open, you can't help admiring your boyfriends hands. how nicely trimmed his nails were with a silver band around his ring finger that you'd gotten him for his birthday almost a year ago that he refused to take off, a mole on his wrist (which he hates) and a freckle in the shape of a heart right beside it. his hands were just pretty, they weren't too large but definitely not small. you take his hand in your own two, removing from your eye, "why are you wearing your ring in the bath?" you furrow your eyebrows at him, "uhh i never take it off. only for volleyball because coach yells at me if i don't." "oh."

you inspect his hand, fidgeting with his fingers and he lets you. "you trim your nails earlier?" "mhm" "i can tell. where'd this bruise come from?" "bumped it on the corner of the dining table." "ah. did i ever tell you that-" "yes, you've told me my hands are pretty. almost everyday, actually." you giggle at him, "that often huh?" "yep." "well, i mean it every time." you mumble, kissing his knuckles, "i know you do." he retracts his hand from yours, hooking a finger under your chin to force your face up, "you're eye looks better."

[harryhandstan]

or the one where you forget harry’s birthday and try desperately to make it up to him

just wanted to write something small to try to get back into writing after my break! thank you all for your encouragement, excitement, and patience and I apologize for it being a few days later than I wanted it to be! this is probably the closest to angst that you’ll ever get from me :)

thank you to @1980holland, @summertimestyles, @tbslenthusiast, @bigspoonstyles​, @angryinternetduck, and @iconicharry for letting me run my ideas by you and being so kind in general. more thanks to @tbslenthusiast and @bigspoonstyles for being the most wonderful beta readers and just lovely friends overall!

this is another part of my dad!harry series so as always they are linked in order if you want to re-visit them or read from the beginning if you choose to!

⭐ I Want Your Belly ⭐ Wonderful and Warm ⭐ Washed Away in You ⭐ Do You Want to Build a Snowman? ⭐ A Styles Family Christmas ⭐

word count: 3.6k

“Harry, I’m running late do you think you could drop Sterling off at the sitter’s on your way to set?”

You’re already dressed, pulling on your shoes and grabbing your bag and keys from where they were tossed next to the dresser from the evening before. You dart into the bathroom to quickly brush your teeth.

Harry pokes his head around the doorframe, a wrinkled shirt in his hand, rushing through his own morning routine, “Thought she was coming here?”

“She can’t today, remember? Today’s our day to drop him off.” You put your toothbrush away just as he joins you, taking the toothpaste from your hand to use for himself.

“Alright, yeah. Y’ll have to pick him up later though, think it’ll be a late one for me today.” 

“That’s fine. I’ll throw his bag together and leave it by the door for you to grab on the way out. He’s already been fed and changed so he should be all set. I’ll transfer his car seat to your car too, so you won’t have to worry about that.”

He still has the toothbrush in his mouth, so you stand on your tiptoes to give him a peck to the cheek, adding a “bye, love you!” on your way out the bathroom door.

“Wait..y’don’t have anything else to say to me before you leave?” His mouth now rinsed, he crosses his arms and leans against the doorway, a tired smile working its way across his lips.

“Um..be careful? Don’t drive too fast with Sterling in the car.” 

“I never drive fast,” He takes a quick peek in the mirror, running his hands through his messy curls before turning back to you, “S’that all? Nothing else to say?”

You search your brain, trying to remember anything else you may have forgotten, “Oh! Right..”

His face lights up then, thinking maybe he was gonna finally hear the words he’d been waiting all morning to hear from you.  

“Make sure you tell the sitter there’s an extra pacifier in the right side of his bag that she can leave there in his cubby in case we ever forget one..and that I’ll drop a pack of diapers and wipes off when I pick him up cause I know he’s running low.”

His brow furrows slightly with disappointment, but you’re too busy to notice, blowing him another kiss before rushing out the door of your shared bedroom and down the hall to get Sterling’s bag ready.

He’s still pouting as he opens his top drawer to select a pair of socks for the day.

He couldn’t believe you forgot it was his birthday.

In your opinion, 6 weeks was not long enough for maternity leave. You’re sure no amount of time in your happy bubble with Harry and Sterling would’ve been enough. 

You were somehow able to push those 6 weeks to 12, your boss kindly agreeing to let you do what work you could from home. Eventually, that extension had to come to an end though and there was no other way you could avoid returning to ‘normal’ life.

You’re an hour into your work day but you still can’t shake the feeling that you had truly forgotten something. Harry’s words from the morning ring through your head again and again but you still couldn’t pinpoint what was special about this particular day. It was a Monday..was there some sort of significant anniversary from your relationship over the years, something small but important to him? 

You grab your phone when you have a chance, a quick lull in your morning that allows you to scroll through your phone’s calendar to double check anything your phone may have not yet notified you about. There’s nothing saved, and it does nothing to jog your memory of what importance today’s date holds. 

A text from Anne comes through and your heart stops when you read the message: Tell the birthday boy his present from me is on the way! I was a day later than I should’ve been sending it out so hope he won’t be too upset with me. All my love to you and Sterling as well!

No. Oh no. Guilt bubbles up through your chest and you cover your mouth to stop from cursing too loudly and scaring your nearby coworkers. You have to steady your hand so you can navigate your way through your contacts to Harry’s number, trying to calculate where in his schedule for the day he may be now. It was too early for him to be taking a lunch break, but you silently prayed he would be on a break in between filming scenes that would allow him to answer.

He had told you in the past that even if he wasn’t able to have his phone with him, it was always nearby. Especially now that you had Sterling, he tried to make himself available no matter how busy his schedule would be for the day. Even if he wasn’t able to answer, he would always make time to call back. 

So when you try 2 times with no success of getting through, you stop. You had both agreed before that 3 calls was your distress signal, and you didn’t want his mind to think the worst when he did see you’d tried to get through to him. A text seems too informal, too little for the man you love and adore. He deserved better than that, better than you, a partner who forgot one of the most important days where he should be made to feel special and loved every second.

It wasn’t like you didn’t know this day was coming, you did, of course you did. Being a new parent had well and truly ruined your memory. Turns out birthing a tiny human requires learning a ton of new information to keep your little one alive, meaning that even almost 3 months later your brain hadn’t been fully restored and you weren’t sure if it ever would be. 

How could you make up for something like this? You suppose you could pretend that it was all a joke; that you’d had this elaborate plan all along to surprise him and make him think that you had forgotten his birthday. But you couldn’t lie to him like that, it would only cause you to hate yourself even more later for covering it up. Plus, Harry knew you too well and would see right through that, and then whatever hurt you’re sure he was feeling now would only grow. 

You know he would eventually forgive you, if he hadn’t already, but that didn’t stop guilt from overriding your thoughts. If anything it made you feel almost worse knowing that he would be so incredibly forgiving.

God, you could only imagine the reaction of the fans if they found out. Some of them already had some questionable opinions about you, a few even going so far as to speculate if Sterling was truly Harry’s child, claiming that you had somehow “trapped” Harry into a relationship with you and that it would eventually fail. Harry had tried to ban you from going too deep, but sometimes your curiosity got the best of you, prompting you to scroll through Twitter or Instagram occasionally. It usually ended with you getting your feelings hurt and Harry having to remind you once again to stay away.

You try to find something in your memory, anything that he may have mentioned wanting (or at this point even needing) over the past few months. Aside from the mundane, everyday things like laundry detergent and shampoo to add to the shopping list, you couldn’t recall a thing. You only had 6 hours before you had to pick up Sterling, so you had to come up with something fast, something amazing.

What do you get for the golden boy who has everything?

You couldn’t believe you didn’t think of it before. It was something you had discovered not long after Sterling’s birth, but like many other things it had gotten easily dismissed and pushed down to the bottom of your list. 

Today, it only takes a few clicks through the website, a double checking of the spelling of the name that will be on the certificate, and a quick selection of a location for where you want it to be for Harry to now be the (hopefully) proud owner of his very own star in the sky.

After all it was Harry who found the name Sterling for your child, it was him who whispered “buonanotte nostra piccola stella” each night as he helped you put Sterling to bed; a phrase he had been most pleased with himself for learning, the Italian to English translation being “goodnight our little star”. If he couldn’t be there to say it, he made sure you knew the proper enunciation of the expression so that you could pass it along from him. It was always followed by 3 kisses to the top of his son’s head.

Thankfully, you were able to use the printer at work to print out the certificate and the map, slipping them both into a manilla envelope and tucking it away in your bag before you clock out for the day. Though you wished you had time to stop and select a nice frame, you only have 30 minutes before having to pick up Sterling, so you opt for a speedy trip to the nearest bakery and grocery store to gather what other supplies you’ll need for the rest of the evening.

By the time you and Sterling make it home, you still haven’t heard anything from Harry. You send up another silent prayer, more for his safety than anything, but also selfishly for yourself and his forgiveness towards you. It wasn’t unusual for you to not hear from him most days, and you remind yourself of his words from that morning about most likely having to work late. 

You push away the guilt that threatens to invade your thoughts again, doing what you need to do for Sterling to keep him content while you start preparations for dinner. Once you have him settled in his swing nearby, you take a moment to scroll through your music selection on your phone, deciding that having something playing in the background would be better than being alone with your thoughts while you work. 

You’ve just washed the veggies to chop for the salad when your phone dings, indicating a new message. You know it’s from Harry, and you’re almost scared to look. Instant relief floods your body when you do have the courage to take a peek: Home in an hour. Love you! Give bub kisses from me xx

The “love you” fills you with overwhelming comfort; takes you back to the day you first met him and how your heart skipped a beat when you realized it was you he was trailing through the crowd of people to approach, a cozy smile plastered on his face. You’ll never forget the gentle way he had spoken and how even though you were surrounded by at least a hundred other people at the party, he didn’t take his eyes off you the whole night. You let out a huge sigh of breath you hadn’t realized you’d been holding in and contemplate the best way to respond, finally concluding that simple was better.

Be careful, baby. Love you more!! Bubs and I miss you

His text gives you more motivation than you already had to power through making his favorite meal for him. An hour is plenty of time to get everything done, so when Sterling gets fussy and wants to be held, you tuck him against your side, doing what you can with one hand while keeping a tight grip on your son. You know he had missed you when he almost instantly relaxes at being close to you, and your heart hurts at the thought of ever being away from him again, even for something important like your job.

It still takes you a minute to get him calm enough to rest his head on your shoulder, so you don’t hear the sound of the door, or the clink of Harry’s keys or the sound of his footsteps falling down the hallway.

“Need some help, lovie?”

His voice, which normally calms you, nearly makes you jump out of your skin. So when you turn and say, “I thought you said an hour!” it comes out more like an attack than grateful to see him again.

“S’what I thought but we rushed through so I could leave earlier. Is that a problem?” His face is unreadable, somewhere between confused and disappointed with your tone.

“No! Of course not, Harry, I just..” That’s when your voice breaks, your guilt and emotions of forgetting his birthday finally being too much to hold back.

“Hey, don’t do that,” He’s moving the rest of the way through the kitchen to you, a hand smoothing a small circle over your back as you try to wipe your tears, “Please don’t cry.”

“I just wanted to have everything ready by the time you got home, to make up for this morning. For forgetting it was your birthday in the first place. I’m so sorry, H.” 

“You’ve got nothin’ to apologize for, angel. You don’t have to make anything up to me. We’ve both been crazy busy lately, I’m surprised I even remembered what day it was. Here, why don’t I put Sterling in his swing and help you finish dinner?”

“No, absolutely not. It’s your birthday and I know you’re tired. Plus, I think he missed us today. You know how much he loves his swing but I didn’t get very much done before he got upset.”

“Alright, well, I’ll take him while you get everything else done. How’s that sound?”

You nod an agreement at his plan, transferring Sterling from your shoulder to his. There’s a few whimpers of disapproval, but he lets out a small sigh of contentment once he realizes it’s Harry who holds him now. Harry turns his head to smack a few kisses to the baby’s cheek to further pacify him. Sterling’s eyes open briefly, gazing sleepily up at his father. 

“Hi, bub, missed you. Let’s go see what kind of trouble we can get into while Mummy makes dinner, huh?” 

“Not too much trouble, boys. It’s almost bedtime,” He winks at you as he turns to leave and you stop him, “Hey, wait, try this. Tell me if it needs anything.”

You stir a spoon through the pasta sauce you’ve had simmering away on the stove, bringing it to his lips with a hand underneath, careful not to drip it down the front of his white button-up or the top of Sterling’s head. He lets you feed him the spoonful, but doesn’t take his eyes off your lips.  Before you even have time to ask him how it is, he’s trapping his mouth against yours, a satisfied hum at the sauce mixing with the taste of you.

“Delicious.” He runs his tongue along his bottom lip, catching a bit of sauce that ended up smudged at the corner of his mouth.

“Really?”

“Really, darling, it’s perfect.” 

At this point it’s obvious he’s not talking about the sauce, and you push yourself up to plant another kiss on his lips.

“Another,” He gently demands, and you oblige, but he doesn’t pull away yet, “C’mon, few more.”

“Looks like Sterling’s not the only needy baby in this house tonight. How many more kisses do you need?”

He smirks down at you, “It’s my 27th birthday, innit? Think I deserve 27 kisses, don’t you?”

You send him away with the promise of fulfilling his request for the rest of his kisses later, finally able to rush through finishing the last of what was needed to complete the meal and call him back to see the table full of everything you’ve prepared. 

Sterling is bright eyed in Harry’s arms again, and you hope that feeding him will lull him back to sleep for the night. With him having to stay with a sitter on the days that you and Harry were both working, you’d recently had to switch to using bottles for some of his meals. The sitter had assured you that he was adjusting to the bottle well when he was with her, but it had been a frustrating transition for you. 

“You’ve just spoiled him to the usual way, love. It’ll get easier. Want me to try?” He holds out his hand, offering to take the bottle and Sterling back, but you refuse. You know Harry’s right, it will get easier eventually, but right now you know he’s just still tired and hungry. So you give in, lifting your shirt and tossing a blanket over him while he eats. 

“Eat so you can blow out your candles and then open your present.”

He sets a plate of food in front of you and passes you a fork so you can eat with your free hand.

His mouth is full of food but his green eyes light up when he looks at you, “I have a present?” 

“Of course you do. It’s your birthday, isn’t it?” 

“Can we skip cake and do the present first?”

You giggle at his excitement, but the truth is you’re nervous. You know he will be nice enough to tell you he loves it, but you also know him well enough to read the truth on his face. 

“Sure, birthday boy, whatever you want.” Sterling’s finished eating by now so you rest him on your shoulder, tapping his back a few times until you hear a small burp. Harry’s plate is mostly empty now, as is yours, so you tuck Sterling into his swing while you go to retrieve the envelope from earlier in the day. Your heart races as you may your way back to where he sits at the table, his eyes covered dramatically as he waits.

“You can open,” You slide the envelope in front of him and prop your chin up on one of your hands as you watch his fingers work to open the clasp. The papers sit upside down on the table and you inhale a deep breath as he flips them over. His face is full of curiosity as his eyes scan the page. 

“Did you..is this real?”

“Well I’m not sure how official it is but, yes, it’s real.” You take the map from behind the certificate and point out the location, “According to this it’s..”

“Is my star right over our house?” His eyes are wide as he studies the coordinates, “Can we go see if we can see it now?”

How can you say no to that? You let him lead you out the back door of your home and out into the cool air of the night. He only lets go of your hand when he reaches the edge of the yard, pointing straight upwards.

“It’s gotta be that big one, right? That mine, right?” You look over his shoulder down at the map and then back up to where he’s pointing.

“Yep, I think that’s the one. Unless..do you have the map upside down?”

“No! Do I?” He squints his eyes, bringing it closer to his face in an attempt to read it in the dark. 

“You definitely did. It’s that one there..to the left of the big one we thought was yours.”

“S’gorgeous, baby,” He tugs your hand until your smushed against his side and he tosses his arm around you, letting out a deep sigh as he continues to stare up at the sky, “Thank you so much.”

“You really like it?” You’ve got both arms wrapped around his middle now, enjoying the feeling of his chest rising and falling.

“I really do, angel. Can’t believe you named a star after me twice.” 

“Twice?” You tilt your head upwards to look at his face.

“Yeah. Twice. That one,” He points up again, “My favorite one though, the greatest gift you will probably ever give me, is probably snoring in his swing right about now.”

As sweet as the moment is, you can’t help but snort out a laugh at that, “If he’s anything like you, he’s definitely snoring right now.”

“Hey, I don’t snore!”

“Oh yes, you do. Feel like I’m sleeping in a cave with a bear sometimes.”

That earns you a big, booming laugh from him, and he pulls you even closer to kiss the top of your head. You turn your body to face him, squeezing him once and kissing his chest through his shirt.

“Happy birthday, Harry.”

“Thank you,” He places his hands on either side of your face, thumbs rubbing along your cheeks, a slow smile sneaking its way across his face, “Can I have the rest of my kisses now?”

The next time Anne and Gemma come to visit, he’s sweeping them down to the end of the hallway leading into your living room, to where he now proudly shows them the framed certificate and map sitting side by side on the wall. Of course they had both already heard about it before. The day after his birthday he had spent 10 minutes on the phone with each of them bragging about it. He’s got Sterling in his arms as he shows it off now. He holds him up next to the two frames.

“How lucky am I, huh? Not every man can say they have two stars named after them, can they?”

thank you for reading! I hope you enjoyed it!

as always likes, reblogs, replies, and feedback are welcome!

tag list: @1980holland, @summertimestyles, @la-cey, @tbslenthusiast​

[seonghwanotes]

730 days | song mingi

pairing: mingi x reader

genre: angst

word count: 2k

a/n: i personally hate this piece so much, it hits a little too close to home but i wrote it decently and its still cringy gah dayum & there's no part 2 because some things are better off this way

You were in a relationship with Mingi for 2 years now and today was your anniversary with him. Lately, you could never get to go out with him on your monthly anniversaries since he was always busy with work which you understood and didn't mind about. So, you were exhilarated that you finally got the chance to celebrate a special day with him today.

You got dressed pretty early and drove to his house because you knew that he would be late or forget that you both had a date planned out since he hasn't texted you all day long.

While you were driving to his place, you turned up the volume on the radio and drove silently. The memories of when you first met Mingi flooded into your mind as you drove by the familiar street.

You fell in love with Mingi the second you saw him at a distant friend's birthday party. He was avoiding people at the party so it wasn't that hard for you to start a small talk with him. That night was definitely one of the best nights you've had, Mingi didn't even hesitate talking to you, in fact even when everyone had left, you both were still chatting away without realising it was late night.

You let out a small laugh as you drove into the street that Mingi lives at when you thought about the day he confessed to you. You had been talking to him everyday for a few months now and there was a misunderstanding between the two of you which resulted in a fight. Mingi being the gentleman he is, came to your doorstep late at night apologising and also, confessed his feelings for you.

And ever since, things have been going amazing between the two of you. Or so, you thought.

You reached the place and parked your car in front of his porch, turning off the engine before you walked to his doorstep. You felt nervous, as if it was your first date with him. Your hand reached the doorbell and clicked on it.

"Coming!"

You took a few steps back, knowing that his tall figure would accidentally bump into you by accident if he was about to walk out. Within seconds, he opened the door and came out. The smell of his cologne immediately flooded your surroundings, making you flinch a little, followed by a loud sneeze.

He was in the middle of locking his house door when his head turned to your direction, "Everything alright?"

You nodded, rubbing your nose. You managed to steal a glance at him, he was clad in a pair of light blue jeans along with an oversized white shirt, a denim jacket over it. You, on the other hand, wore jeans as well and a flowy blouse with your hair let down.

"You look pretty," He commented, making you realise he was done locking his door. You smiled at his compliment and returned one to him, "You look handsome as well."

"Where do you wanna go?" He asked, holding your hand as you both started walking. Everytime Mingi touched you, it would make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside. This time, you didn't feel anything at all, not coming off as a surprise to you anymore.

"I don't know, I told you I didn't mind any place." You replied back.

"It's okay, it's better if you choose a place. I don't want to argue with you later about this." He said.

You looked at him with furrowed brows, wondering what he meant. Was he really going to argue with you before your date even started? That too, on your anniversary?

It took him a while to realise what came out of his mouth as he looked at you and tried to come up with an excuse. "I mean, I just don't want you to feel unhappy about it later."

You were obviously hurt from what he said earlier but you didn't want to show it to him, knowing that he would try to convince you to not feel this way. You hummed at his statement and looked at him, "Let's just go to McDonalds, I guess."

"McDonalds?"

"Didn't you tell me to choose a place?" You questioned him, starting to feel tired with his questions. You managed to catch him sigh and roll his eyes before he turned away, clenching his jaw.

Your relationship with Mingi was falling apart, that was for sure.

The first year together, everything was perfect and you had almost no arguments at all. You both went on dates a lot and took things up a notch. It felt like paradise whenever you were with him.

However in your second year, you felt like things started to lose its authenticity slowly. You began to argue with Mingi over the pettiest things and so did he. You've cried more during arguments with him than out of stress that now if you argued with him, you felt so numb and tired.

The relationship was getting toxic day by day.

"What's your problem now?" He finally asked, leaving a scar on your heart again with his blunt question.

"What's my problem?" You quivered, tears were starting to form in your eyes. You let go of Mingi's hand and asked him, "Why are you always arguing with me, Mingi?"

The look of fury turned into sorrow on Mingi's face as he heard your voice crack when you asked him that question. He knew that you had reached your point, you couldn't hold it in anymore. He had hurt your feelings to that point.

Yet, he didn't show any sign of pity towards you when he questioned you back. "Why are you like this? We've been fighting almost everyday."

You were on the verge of crying as tears collected in your eyes. "Why am I like this? Are you really asking me why I am like this? I've been trying my best to save our relationship every time it has been falling apart and you're asking me why am I like this? When are you going to realise that you have been screwing up our relationship, Mingi?"

He flinched at the mention of his name. You had never used his name before when you were together unless you were pissed or sometimes, jokingly. You had never used it when you were arguing as well. So it took him by surprise that his name left your mouth that day.

"Baby…"

Even him using pet names on you made you shiver, you knew it wasn't genuine anymore. He had stopped using pet names for weeks now, you didn't want to hear anything anymore. You looked at him in the eyes, hoping for him to tell you that it's okay and we would be alright. But he didn't.

Even though he put in more effort into your relationship compared to you, he was also the one hurting you the most that it was starting to drive you crazy. You loved him, you loved him with your whole heart and you didn't want to let him go. But in order for you to be alright again, you had to let him go.

Which resulted in you saying those words that you never expected yourself to say when you started dating Mingi.

"I think it's best for us to break up."

You both remained silent for a while, until you started sobbing and looked down. You hated this so much. You didn't want to show him that you were weak and vulnerable. You were at your lowest and you knew you couldn't hold it in anymore.

Mingi's hand reached to touch yours but you jerked away. "Please don't."

He immediately took his hand away and stood still in front of you. Seeing that he was quiet, you knew he was speechless and was thinking of what to say. You didn't want to look at him as well knowing that you would start to cry harder.

At the same time, you wanted him to ask you to stay. You wanted him to tell you that he was willing to fix things between the two of you. You wanted him to tell you that he loves you and he doesn't want you to leave him.

But he did nothing.

You didn't want to leave him, heck, it was stupid of you to even initiate the break up. but, you were not wrong. Mingi didn't even bother begging you to speak or wipe away your tears as he would.

You didn't want to assume things, perhaps he was hiding his pain as well as you did. Maybe it was going to take him some time to realise how fucked up the relationship was.

"Okay." He breathed out, a croak following along as he looked away.

You looked up at him, "Okay?"

"Yeah, let's break up." He said, making eye contact with you as you watched a tear roll down his cheek. You wanted to hold his cheek, wipe his tears and say that it was okay. You wanted to kiss him like there was no tomorrow.

But you didn't.

Instead, you started to cry. You covered your face with your hands as you cried in front of him. You didn't want to leave him, you knew very well you were still wrapped around his finger. You wanted to call him everyday, you wanted to text him good night and I love you everyday. You wanted to give him kisses every time he was sad after watching movies. But that wasn't going to happen.

You felt a pair of warm hands engulf you into a hug, hot tears dropping onto your blouse and Mingi held you tight for one last time. You dropped your hands and hugged him back, crying on his chest that you were starting to lose air.

You knew very well if you stayed in that position for a little longer, you would tell him that you were sorry and you would tell him to forget what you said. So, you pulled away from his hug. Mingi's eyes were red and puffy, he sniffed and looked up at the sky, holding back his tears.

You kissed him back for a brief second before he pulled away. His hand remained intact on your cheek, "It's okay Y/N, you don't have to apologise. I understand where you're coming from."

You couldn't help it. It broke you to see him in pain and you didn't want to see him in that situation ever. So, you opened your mouth to speak but Mingi stopped you by asking, "Can I kiss you one last time?"

Your eyes were glazed, you didn't know what to say. This was really it. This was happening for real and you had to accept it. You gave a subtle nod which led him to kiss you out of nowhere. You didn't move, you stood still as his kiss made you feel warm and content for one last time.

You looked down as he said that, shutting your eyes. You took a deep breath, telling yourself that it was okay and heartbreaks are normal. His hands took yours and he kissed them, before he talked to you.

"Just promise me that you won't give up on love because of what happened between us."

You had no words, you didn't even know what to say to him. You remained quiet for a while. He let go of your hands, "I love you Y/N, I always have and I always will. I'm sorry for hurting you all this while and not owning up to my mistake."

"I'm sorry too Mingi," Your voice croaked, you weren't able to tell the former cause it hurt too much in you to say it back.

"Just…" He paused, looking hesitant to continue his sentence. You could tell he wasn't going to continue his sentence knowing your answer, "Text me when you get back home."

After he said that, he walked back inside his house, leaving you alone at his porch - a crying mess. You got into your car and cried for a good 10 minutes. You wanted him to come out and kiss you, tell you to come inside and convince you to stay.

But you were both too egoistic for that. He knew you wouldn't bother his words, nor would you if he asked you to give him another chance. You looked up at his window, you saw his shadow through his sheer curtains and you could make out that he was crying as well.

No matter how much you loved him, you had to end your relationship before everything felt forced and fake. Before everything was merely a show. It was better to give your all in the relationship instead of giving only half or nothing.

So you drove back home.

[who-am-i-hahaha-noclue]

The first time my birthday sucked was after my older sister had her first suicide attempt. She had it two weeks before my birthday so on my birthday my mom brought her with us shopping and then brought her to her therapy appointment. I sat in the doctors office waiting room crying on that day. I had just turned 14.

The next year her suicide attempt was two weeks after my birthday.

And the year I turned 16 it was three weeks before my birthday. And I had begun to resent her. I barely talked to my sister for like 2 years, and thought of her a selfish. In reality I just didn’t understand the situation that was going on in her head. After that realization we started to talk more.

When I turned 20 she met this guy and introduced him to the family and we all loved him. I love her boy friend and he was so nice to her. They moved i together and planned to get married this spring.

I turned 22 today, and almost one month ago she died. I talked and saw her the morning she went into the hospital and she was perfectly fine. I had come to pick up her younger sister around noon, we were gonna go shopping. Around 2 in the afternoon she called me and asked when we were coming home and I told her we would be there by 3. When three o’clock came around I brought her home and walked her sister to the front door so I could say goodbye to my older sister. No one answered the door and we left. An hour goes by and my sisters boyfriend calls my mom and tells her he found my sister on the floor not breathing. When my mom came home from the hospital that night she tells my younger sisters and I that my older sister isn’t going to live and won’t wake up. Five days go by and they finally do an mri to see if she has any brain activity. They pronounced her 100% brain dead.

Now when I think of my sister I think it’s kind of funny that she died so close to my birthday. I am sad that I resented her for such a long time, and even felt annoyed when she was around. I wish I could hug her or hear her, because I miss her and she’s not coming back. I think about her everyday and I can’t call her or send her a text because there will be no reply. I hope she knows I loved her too, and even if I didn’t say it that I didn’t hate her because I know she loved me.