#half the time they go ‘idk man i don’t see any issue’

[pervertwhore]

same beer belly anon here! hi! :3 also.ajdjwldnwkkansns raaaarrrgh your fuckign brain!!!!!

leon would be pretty insecure and would need quite a bit of reassuring! he would miss what he thinks was his 'prime' (I.e re4 build) and reader would literally be on their knees, worshipping all that he is and showing just how much they love Leon for him, regardless of his body <3

your dark leon got me acting up in a way that sets feminism back a couple hundred years uhmm😳😳😳 he would be bad! terrible, even! you would only fuel his alcoholic behavior rather than fixing him (there is no fixing him and you were a fool to think that in the first place.)

but pros are uhm uhm he suffocates you with his belly on the regular soooooo🤷‍♀️ like i had this image of Leon laying on top of reader, their stomach is pressed down to the floor, meanwhile his tummy is pressed right up against readers back, trapping them essentially. they have to deal with Leon's body weight pressing down on them, his arms wrapped around them and his sheer strength keeping them in place. and he's smirking the entire time as he watches reader struggle to move. he! would! be! awful!

NONNIE!!!!! IM GONNA KISS YOU!!!! this is literally sensational LIKE YOU GET ME!!! YES!!!!!! BEER BELLY LEON AGENDA IS GETTING SPREAD AND THE WORLD CHEERED!! world peace has been restored :33

insecure! leon is sooo regretful :(( like he looks at himself in the mirror and even though his tummy doesn’t take away from his skills AT ALL, he still feels so inferior, like he looks around at the people around him and even though change comes with time, their changes weren’t the same as him gaining weight so he’s literally crashing out — but YOU!!! at least help alleviate the deep rooted anxiety and just inner self loathing he’s developed over the years.

i think it’s hot idc!! riding him or sucking on his cock while he has a beer in hand, like he’s so “im disgusting, don’t do that,” like hello im currently between your thighs with my hands down your pants what are you saying??

just think abt it with me nonnie… sucking on his fat cock (hard or not) while he’s sitting back on his couch and drinking a beer.. he’s so embarrassed?? like cmon! don’t lower yourself to his level, find a better man, a man that’s not broken, one that’s not an alcoholic and not one that’s let himself go ;(( he’s drunkenly babbling but your kissing his into thighs and tummy before popping his cock in your mouth and sucking slowly while telling him that he’s the most attractive man in the world STOP!!! he cums so fast it’s so humiliating BUT IT HELPS!!! cuz you reassure him that he’s all you’ve ever wanted :33

now..dark! leon is a whole other story i fear.. he would be a horrible partner but IDC!! i still want his ass in my bed and on top of me 🔥 NO LITERALLY, there’s no way to fix him, he’s too far gone! at one point you tried to point out his addiction and it turned into an argument and you kinda stopped trying.. like yea you’re an enabler but whatever he physically can’t be in a relationship with someone trying to fix his issues it will make him crash out. he uses alcohol as a way to cope and i fear he’s never gonna give it up (>_<;)

and YES!! he does use his strength and weight against you :(( you can complain and whine all you want, but you and him both know you enjoy it. (me too girl) like he’s quite literally folding you in half, he doesn’t care if you’re flexible or not. in any context, dark! leon loves when you cry, dacryphilia king!! he just loves making you cry and seeing you squirm and try to fight to get him off of you.. like aw, sweetheart, did you really think some pushes and kicks would work against him?

him pressing his tummy against your back…UGH.. you’re so right, his cock is so girthy inside you, he gets so painfully rough with you :(( shoving his cock deep again your cervix and keeping you still..his arm wrapped around your neck as he holds you in a head lock :( and idk if you fw this but him slapping you around while you’re sucking on his cock >_< like you gag & squirm and he pinches your nose and gives you a few hard smacks across your face so you can get it together!! CMON!! you know better than that 😒 but again..YOU TWO BOTH KNOW YOU ENJOY IT!! smh! don’t try to hide it!!

[littlejuicebox]

Little Lockpick.

Okay this is the last addition for the weekend.

My ADHD hyperfixated on Dadstarion and now I need to focus on my big girl life and job for the week.

Definitely didn’t mean to go this crazy on the writing but hey, when inspiration strikes. 🤷‍♀️

I really need to update these headers at some point. Problems for future Gina.

Summary: Toddler Gale has developed new magic skills and wants Papastarion to open a lock NOW. Right now. Tav has some interesting news after an appointment.

Tags/Warnings: kids, babies, parenthood, fluff, idk what else?

*

Astarion is in his office, trying to work, which is almost impossible with Gale sitting on his lap. The toddler is fiddling with something in his small hands as his father reads over a scroll for the second time, trying to focus on the words. It’s become increasingly difficult to do so as frustrated huffs and grunts escape the almost-three-year-old.

“Daddy! Help!” Gale exclaims, pulling Astarion’s attention from the scroll and down to the little silver-haired boy. The toddler is shaking what’s in his hand up at his father, nose crinkled in displeasure.

“Hmm…” The elf murmurs, taking the little toy — if you could call it that — from his son. It’s a small padlock. The toddler had been trying, quite incessantly, to open it for nearly half an hour. It was enough to keep Gale pre-occupied while his mother went to her appointment, but now the toddler is getting frustrated and his father knows there will soon be a melt down if the issue isn’t remedied.

“Little prince, where did you find this?” Astarion asks while handing the tiny metal lock back to Gale. The silver-haired boy climbs off his father’s lap. Uncoordinated legs take him over to the bookshelf along the office wall, and he points to the bottom shelf.

“Found here! Right here.” The toddler babbles, crinkling his white eyebrows at his father, wondering why the older man is asking him such a silly question. Gale is growing more impatient, upset that Astarion simply isn’t doing what he asked and opening the lock. But no, daddy insists on asking him these questions instead, “Why daddy? Why? Open it!”

Tiny fingers grip the loop of the lock again, trying and failing to release the mechanism with sheer force. The child’s two little arms aren’t strong enough to pry open the lock. Gale is growing more and more frustrated. Red patches flush across his cheeks as he grunts, compelling Astarion to move from his chair and crouch in front of the toddler, intending to placate him.

“We need a key to open the lock, Gale. I was hoping there would be one near where you found the lock but I don’t think—“ The elf starts, but he’s cut off by a high pitched wail escaping his son.

“OPEN! OPEN! OPEN!”

The little boy is throwing himself on the ground now, still gripping the offending toy. Fat, frustrated tears are falling from his gorgeous green eyes. He’s practically the spitting image of his father, and even in his tantrums he is a beautiful, adorable thing. But Astarion begins to panic, knowing Gale needs to calm down, he needs to calm down before—

The toddler shrieks at the top of his lungs and a powerful gust of wind comes from nowhere, knocking Astarion onto his back and sending a flurry of papers shooting off the desk.

It’s ironic, Astarion thinks, that his son is named Gale and the first spell he can unintentionally cast is a gust of wind whenever he’s throwing a tantrum. The elf is groaning in pain as his eyes clamp shut; he is trying desperately to regain his composure before he addresses the toddler. These terrible twos have been… well, terrible. Astarion’s patience is running thin.

He remembers his wife’s coaching. Deep breath in, long exhale out. The poor little prince doesn’t know any better.

The wind scares Gale into silence. He doesn’t yet understand his powers, and when he sees his father knocked prone on the floor, he starts crying again. They’re sticky, snot-filled, guilty tears, this time. He doesn’t understand how he conjures the wind, but he does know that the damage is his fault. Despite his current tantrum, Gale is an overall empathetic and sensitive boy, and the vision of the damage he’s done worries him.

“Sorry, daddy!” The toddler gasps through choked cries, sitting himself up and bunching his hands in tight, worried fists which he brings to the sides of his face, “I a bad boy!”

Astarion rolls himself up to a sitting position and scoops the child into his arms with a belabored sigh, “You’re not a bad boy, Gale.”

He soothes the child in a soft coo as he rubs small circles on the little boy’s back. Gale’s small body continues to wrack with sobs as his father places a kiss on his crown of silvery curls and whispers, “You’re just an exceptionally powerful one. But you get that from your mother, little prince.”

The elf stands, taking his son with him in the process as he walks out of the office, headed towards the bedchambers and still rubbing the little boy’s back as the toddler begins to calm down.

The papers will just have to be cleaned up later.

*

“Again, again, daddy!”

When you find your husband and child, they are both laying atop your bed, facing away from the door. Gale is giggling incessantly and clapping his hands together, asking his father to repeat something.

“There you two are. What are you doing?” You ask as you enter the room, one hand on your stomach. You’ve just come from an appointment with Jaheira.

The two men turn their heads and grin at you practically in unison. It makes you chuckle. It’s truly startling, how similar they are from their looks to their mannerisms. You catch sight of Astarion’s old lockpicking kit between the two of them, and your eyebrow cocks curiously.

“Are you really showing our toddler how to pick locks, Astarion?” You ask as you make your way to sit on the bed with the rest of your little family.

“Yes. But it’s a bit of a story, love. I’ll fill you in on the details later.” Your husband responds, handing the padlock and one of the tools to Gale, where he attempts to mimic the previous motions of his father. His tiny tongue sticks out as he focuses.

Astarion moves to kiss your cheek and then lightly brushes his fingers against your abdomen, subtly greeting the growing life inside, “How did the appointment go?”

“Good…” You murmur in a long, drawled out way. By your tone and the large grin spreading across your face, your husband can tell something is up.

His eyebrow cocks as he assesses your face, trying to decipher the thoughts behind your eyes. Whatever it is, it obviously isn’t bad news, and the knot in his stomach he’d constantly carried prior to this preliminary check-up is starting to finally subside as he analyzes you.

It took a long time to conceive this round; you two had nearly given up. When you finally missed your moonblood, both of you were waiting with bated breath for the first month. This experience was a sharp contrast to Gale’s conception, which happened easily, by accident and without much thought. Both of you had been emotional, nervous wrecks up until now.

“What is it, darling?” Your husband asks, smiling despite himself, simply matching your energy.

“Jaheira is almost certain it’s twins, Astarion.” You respond, and then you’re laughing as you watch your husband’s face turn from shocked to excited to worried to overwhelmed all in the span of a few seconds.

“Twins?” He asks, dumbly, trying to process the new information. A hand comes to rake through his curls as he exhales through the shock, “Love, we might need to hire some more help, I know you said you didn’t want to, but—“

“Yes, I was thinking the same. Especially if they’re also going to show Gale’s same penchant for spells.” You agree, and at the mention of your son’s name he perks up and grins at you, proudly showing you the lock, “Speaking of which…”

You reach into your robe pocket and retrieve a small beaded necklace before patting your lap, and beckoning to your son, “Come here to me, my little love.”

Gale obliges happily, crawling over to settle in your lap. You kiss the crown of his head and then clasp the small necklace onto the toddler. Astarion is watching you curiously, his head tilts to the side as he brings his hand to grasp the necklace and examine it. The toddler sure does love that lock, he’s barely acknowledging either of you as you speak around him.

“It’s a dampener,” You explain, “I was telling Jaheira about the recent development. She gave me this. It won’t completely take away Gale’s powers… but it should help to reduce the strength of his spells until he learns to control them himself.”

Astarion nods with a relieved sigh, “Good. If I’m being honest, darling, I was worried he might accidentally hurt you.”

You nod knowingly and then groan as your stomach begins to growl. The appointment took a bit longer than you thought; it’s past your usual lunch time. You begin to stand, pulling the toddler in your arms with you as you say, “Now how about lunch in the sunroom? I’m starving.”

Astarion hums in agreement, “Go on, my love. I’ll grab the food and join you two in just a moment.”

You nod and carry Gale out, singing softly to the little boy as you head to the sunroom, leaving Astarion to gather his own thoughts for a moment.

The elf throws himself back on the bed with a groan, running his hand through his curls once again. Twins.

Twice the joy. Twice the work.

Astarion cannot help but to laugh, and then smile, even though he knows the next few years are going to be hectic. Perhaps more hectic than he’d imagined. Before long he’s rolling off the bed and headed to the kitchen, planning to prepare a platter of sandwiches and tea for himself and his two — four — little loves.

[who1ssheesh]

NSFW Xanxus with s/o? 👀

Xanxus NSFW Headcanons

Warnings: seks and swearing; fem!reader; huge OOC; 100% wrong grammar, english still is not my native (it will be one day is this how it works idk); no beta we die like tyl tsuna

Note: tbh, this is really short since I'm still holding back my filthiest thoughts?? The add-on section with sub Xus can be NOT considered serious but those make me raaaaaaaaaawrrr aooga

• Fucking horndog end of the story leave lieks uwu

• No really, he riles up in a second and in the most inconvenient situations. And if you don’t give him what he wants, Xanxus will be very broody for the whole day. Good luck, you will need one ngl

• Xanxus obviously likes (LOOVES) seeing you in revealing tight clothes, this bitch will drop stuff on purpose just to see your bottom if you're wearing a short skirt that day. He will not hide it, man will just be sitting with the nastiest smile, and you know you have to get that thing up since he won’t

• More of a thighs and ass type tbh. Any breast is good if he can see a nice cleavage.

• I really imagine Xanxus as a big juicy man despite Amano’a art style. His thighs worth dying between, his tiddies look heavy I can hold them bb. And I think he also enjoyed someone not really slim? He loves something to GRAB

• Not even in a sexual way. He will always grab your ass even around people and he can't even give you a coherent answer why. He just stares zero brain head empty - he can't admit out loud he loves your body, what a loser

• HUGE size kink. The nastiest, craziest size kink, he is going to be feral with a small s/o like he really means to snap them in half

• Also has a big dick, so……..can’t complain

• Choke him. Never in your life you can even choke him a little bit, but Xanxus appreciates the effort. Your both fragile feminine hands cannot do anything against him and even grab his neck fully, and that feeling of power over you gets him going.

• Then you feel his hot touch around your throat. He is going to show you how it is done

• Enjoys the fight. Someone too obedient is not his type at all, he gets bored quickly, he loves his girlie to has temperament. Scratch him, grab him, bite him and never hold back. Xanxus enjoys smell of blood, seeing your marks all over him after

• Touch. His. Scars. I’m sorry for involving feelings, but he will like it

• You can never dumbfound him with love-bombing btw. Unlike SOMEONE ahemsqualoahem

“I-i love you”

“Yeah, who doesn’t”

But he still thinks that’s lame and kills the mood

• Yes to power play but GOD FUCK NO WHAT ARE YOU DOING GET THE FUCK OUT YOU FREAK to Daddy kink. He has too much going on with parents and has big issues, especially with fathers. But props to being the first person Xanxus calls a freak

• Get on your knees for him and he’s so WEAK

• Speaking of weak. Xanxus thinks too much with his dick, and you won’t have much problem convincing him about something through a good blowjob (or sex in general). He knows your trick but doesn’t mind, since he’s had a good time, nay? Though sometimes he’ll fuck around and just go away “well, bye now”

• Corruption kink and no one will convince me otherwise. Having a confident skilled woman is good. But how about the most stoic, morally right woman turned into the filthiest nastiest whore just for him? Bonus point if she's a virgin, something clicking in his head. Xanxus enjoys the fact he's one and only or at least, if you break up, he's still your first and no other man will satisfy you she same way (those are his words, not mine)

• Such a dirty talker. But usually Xanxus tries to get an answer from you and just laughs and your fucked-out pathetic state. He won't stop until your eyes are glossy and absolutely empty, his dick is the only thing on your mind.

• Xanxus is shameless but still gets really angry when you two get caught. HOT TAKE. It's not about him btw, he doesn't give a shit about being seen with some one-night-stand but YOU as his partner are different. He wants people hear you and know how good he's making you feel, he wants then to see how hot, awesome, smart, pretty, confident you are BUT! Xanxus is the only one who sees you in the nastiest, most vulnerable state.

• Hot take again - he's not against eating you out. First - being between juicy thick thighs worth dying for, second - he again turns it into a dominating moment, where HE decides if you're having an orgasm.

Secret-secret headcanons I myself BELIEVE

• Sit on his face. Xanxus will act like a bitch but in the end you will notice he likes it WAY too much and even has some shade of pink on his cheeks

• Just try to dominate him in general. Use the same dirty words he uses for you, don't be scared to insult him. You both are too fucked up and horny at this moment anyways, Xanxus' brain won't even comprehend what you are telling him and that actually he's supposed to get angry

• Xanxus didn't know this is his kink - a beast being tamed, huh?

• After the first time this idiot didn't even talk to you, trying to process what the hell happened. But seeing you the same as always, still treating him as a big smart boss, and that's what everyone believes, makes him hard instantly.

• Xanxus doesn't like sex toys at all (he can make you see stars without any help) but JUST MAYBE that's the first time you get whips? Question mark?

• Nah, he won't just become suddenly submissive, that's not the point. He will insult you, bite you, scratch, choke you, fight against you. If you can't handle him, you don't deserve him in this state, okay?

[bonesandthebees]

Hi!

I don’t have any friends irl or online who knows anything about this whole mess of a situation, so I hope you’ll allow me to mull this over here or just scream into the void.

I just find the whole broader context of this whole issue fascinating in a deeply disturbing way. I was going to try to understand why dream acts the way he does, but I think I might drive myself mad doing so. Anyway, I think it’s very apparent the happy go lucky time of progressiveism online is over. Obviously, there has always been bad shit online and marginalised communities have been under fire for a long time. What I’m trying to say is there has been this illusion of progressive attitudes, which has eroded away and people are just saying the quiet part out loud these days.

I don’t know if dream is publicly shifting to draw in a right wing audience or if he completely lacks the ability to empathise with/is too stubborn to recognise other people’s feelings and perspectives. Neither options would surprise me tbh. I could go on, but I don’t want to spoil my evening and your whatever your time time of day is. Idk, weird guy.

Anyway, I hope you are doing well! 2025 have been a lot this far, huh? I watched eternal sunshine of a spotless mind this weekend, which made me read Alexander Pope’s Eloisa to Abelard and I finally got the title to World Forgetting. That fic is my all time favourite fic, so I have no idea why I didn’t look into the title before. That’s on me!

(I hope you’ll allow me the moon as a sign off. lol that reminds me that I need to put my tarot cards in the window just in case the full moon decides to show up)

– 🌕

hello welcome to the anon club!!! I shall call you full moon anon :)

it really is getting scary to see the backwards steps we're taking culturally right now. like with all the social media tech billionaires cozying up to trump and the way people are caring less and less about things like calling others slurs and of course the entire tradwife/hating on feminism/i'm just a girl tiktok bs. but I do try to remind myself that backwards steps like those are usually in response to progress. we've seen a huge positive shift in attitudes towards the queer community over the past decade and a half alongside other social issues like racism and feminism, so it's kind of expected that we were going to swing backwards at some point. the reason this is reassuring though is because it's a reminder that it's cyclical, meaning we will push forward again and make even more progress next time. we just have to (unfortunately) wait this out and keep trying to push forward.

ok now as for dream talk I am going to put this under a read more because I do not need to subject my followers to thoughts on what's going through his head unless they wanna see it

yeah, trying to understand dream's whole thought process here is really enough to give you a migraine. it just doesn't make sense because he is objectively making himself just look like a terrible person to work with to outside ccs (will leak your private dms if you ever have a falling out, might go on a huge essay length twitter rant about you if you ghost him, etc.) while also just annoying everyone who isn't part of his core audience. also, I feel like if you're trying to get a more right wing male audience I don't know if openly discussing how you're autistic is going to help you there given... yknow. how those people tend to be in regards to neurodivergent people. like I could be wrong but to me that just doesn't seem like the best strategy if that's where you're trying to shift.

so I'm inclined to think it's the latter: that he's too stubborn to recognize other people's feelings and perspectives. that seems to be where his head is at when he talks about his gripes with tommy and tubbo, especially when he calls tommy disingenuous for... not having the same opinions he did when he was 16? idk man I don't want to understand dream too much

2025 has been so much though. like what the hell.

BUT YEAHHHHH eternal sunshine of the spotless mind!! I hope you enjoyed that it's literally one of my all time favorite movies. and yeah that line from Eloisa to Abelard just hits so hard both in the context of the movie and just in general, so when I was writing a story about amnesia I knew I wanted to tie it into eternal sunshine somehow

[lcandothisallday]

Hiiii. I wanted to know if you would write about Jeremy coming out of ACL surgery and confessing his love while he wakes up from anesthesia. I just love the caretaker/lovey aspect!

Jeremy (WMCJ) x f!reader

hmm idk how i feel about this lol

You had only been dating Jeremy for a few months when he told you he had to go into surgery for his ACL. The only issue being he had known for a bit now and only decided to tell you the night before.

“How come you’re only telling me now!” you exclaim in question. “I could’ve tried to book off of work to join you—”

Jeremy sighed. “That’s exactly why I didn’t tell you until now. You can’t afford skipping a day of work just for me. I’ll be fine,” he shrugged nonchalantly.

“I don’t think you know the lengths that I would go for you, J,” you state matter of factly, swiftly moving to straddle his hips, careful of putting your weight anywhere near his knees before you wrap your arms around neck. “I’ll be there when you wake up. I promise. And best believe I’ll be there for every step of your recovery. Okay?” you whisper sweetly against his lips, before you kiss him, not giving him the chance to object.

The next day comes around and to say you were anxious the entire day was an extreme understatement. You couldn’t believe your boyfriend put you in this position—forced to go to work worried for him. By the time it hit 2:00 pm, you knew you had to find any excuse to leave.

“Please Anna—he’s in surgery as we speak,” you plead to your boss. “If I had known earlier I would’ve asked to have the day off sooner.”

“I told you before— that white man is gonna be the death of you,” she tsked. “Y’all only been dating for what? 3 months and he has you missing half of your work weeks. You needa set your priorities straight,” she stated sassily.

At that, you can’t help but sigh. “Anna I’m in love with him…” you admit quietly, the first time you say it out loud. You had contemplated the feeling, thinking it was entirely too soon to know. But in that moment you knew—and if it meant risking your job, you’d allow it. “I don’t want him waking up in that hospital room alone.”

Anna shook her head and let out a dramatic sigh. “Fineeee. You may leave early…but I expect you to pull extra hours when he’s recovered because lord knows you’re gonna baby that man child.”

You can’t help the smile that overtakes your features. “Thank you so much!” you say, feeling relief.

Without hesitation, you speed out. You make it to the hospital in record time, even before Jeremy is out of the surgery. You wait in his room, scrolling through your phone with your leg bouncing anxiously to desperately try to kill time.

Finally, after what felt like forever, your head snaps up when you hear and see the nurses roll him into the room. Despite his relaxed features, seeing him still unconscious made your heart sink. You stand up to your feet quickly and rush to his side, taking his hand in yours.

“Did the surgery go well?” you ask one of the nurses. She nods and smiles. “Yes it did. He should wake up in the next hour—he’ll probably be a bit loopy from the anesthesia and meds.”

You nod in understanding, your hand giving his a light squeeze which the nurse noticed. “He told me about you,” she started, piquing your interest. “Your name’s Y/N right?” You nod again.

“What did he say?” you ask curiously. She chuckled. “Well we noticed that he came in alone and asked if there’d be anyone to help him with recovery…and he mentioned you reluctantly. Said he felt guilty for dragging you in but knows you’re too stubborn to let him do anything alone.”

“Damn right,” you breathed out.

She chuckled again. “He’s lucky to have you…although I feel sorry for you. He seems like a handful. Kept going on about some detox drink,” she teased, causing you to let out a laugh.

“He definitely is at times. Wouldn’t change it for the world.”

The nurse and you exchanged a few more words before she told you that she’d be back when he’s awake to explain recovery.

You watch the nurse leave before you pull a chair closer to sit on. In the meantime, you take the time to admire your sleeping boyfriend. His eyelashes laid against his cheeks and little specks of his freckles littered his nose. He truly was such a handsome man—if only he just dressed a bit better you thought. But as he says, he didn’t choose the hippy life, the hippy life chose him.

About 20 minutes later is when Jeremy started to wake. He groaned and shifted slightly before you saw his eyebrows furrow. You quickly call for the nurse before you’re rushing back to his side, his hand back in yours. Eventually, his eyes blinked open and it took him a moment to focus on you.

“Hey,” you begin softly with a smile. “How you feeling?”

An adorable toothy grin widened on Jeremy’s face. “Hey baby,” he replied back. “I’m feeling good…I think? I don’t know—I’m hella drugged up.”

You giggled at his response. “Yeah—the nurses said you’d be loopy," you explain, as you brushed a strand of his curls away from his face.

He hummed. With a drowsy smile, he looked at you again, his words slightly slurred. "You know, you're like... the most amazing person in the universe," he mumbled, his eyes struggling to focus.

You chuckled softly. "Baby that's just the anesthesia talking," you replied playfully. "But I'll take the compliment."

"Good," he hummed in satisfaction, resting his head back on the pillow comfortably. “You’re also like super hot,” he murmured, causing you to keep giggling.

“I’m lucky to have you,” he continued. “No one has ever cared this much about me…and I love you.”

Your heart melted at his words, your hands moving up to cup his face. Whether he truly meant it or not, you weren’t sure but it didn’t matter because you felt the same.

“Oh J I love you too,” you hum, leaning down to press a kiss to his lips. “But I fully expect you to say it again when you’re alert and sober,” you giggle.

Jeremy grinned. “Deal…now can you kiss me again? I hear it’s part of the recovery,” he mused cheekily.

[squib-2006]

Dr pt2 spoiler warning

This was a fantastic set of episodes

• Kai and wyldfire are everything. Kai having to deal with someone who acts like he did in the earlier seasons is poetic justice and funny as hell.

• I also like how they kinda tried to explain why Kai seemed calm after sea bound and nyas seaifcation. I guess Kai meditating with wu would make him calmer. At least it confirms that Kai was upset (even if they didn’t show it)

•I am kinda upset that nothing from skybound was brought up with the Djinn. I personally don’t really like skybound but I still find that it could be used more than just oh yah that happened right wink wink. I mean we had to suffer through skybound for something right?

• I actually really liked sora and nyas whole plot with the Djinns curse. It was fun and had a nice conclusion.

• Coles return is great I love his little gang in the land of forgotten things. My favorite has to be the skeleton girl (I forgot her name probably cuz they only say it like 2 times) she’s funny.

• I do wish there was a scene where nyas like btw I found Cole and the other ninja react. I mean she does mention it at the end but no one except Zane has any real reaction.

• Beatrix going off the rails was really funny. It felt like someone gave a teen with daddy issues an insta death weapon.

• rapton switching sides kinda came out of left field for me. Like the guy isn’t the brightest bulb in the box I think it would be more likely for other characters to switch sides. Also how did he recover from being tased so quickly? Man was out cold and not two minutes later he was up and walking around.

• kinda felt that the whole being sucked into non existence should have had more lasting effects (totally not because I want to traumatize or brutally injure Kai no why would I want that /s) tho fake out deaths are pretty par for the course with ninjago, this one actually didn’t make me feel all that much cuz I knew the moment wyldfire got pulled in that this was a fake out. They wouldn’t kill one of there new characters that quickly.

•so wus just legitimately fudging dead. Never thought we would see the day when this old mad would just peace out. Also ghost wu legit looks like he’s slowly loosing his form or something cuz in the first half he appears with his full body but in the last scene he’s in he’s just a chest and a head. It might have just been a stylistic thing tho.

•I’m not mad jay only showed up for around 30 seconds (this just might be my bias tho cuz jays probably the ninja I care the least about, not that I hate him or anything he’s just not that interesting to me) it’s kinda refreshing for me cuz nya gets to be her own character for a bit and not be completely attached to Jay and Jay gets to take up less screen time (if I am being honest Jay had so much focus in the wild brain seasons it kinda got annoying to me personally) idk if he’s actually lost his memories or if that leak is wrong cuz it would make sense cuz he has not searched for the ninja (specifically nya cuz that man is a simp for his gf) Arin missing him by a second is hilarious to me.

•not sure about how I feel about Lloyd being the linchpin for the entire thing. Part of me thinks that it would have fit the shows themes better if all of them used their elemental powers or something else to power the cores to fix everything. But another part of me understands that Lloyd get main character privileges cuz he’s the son of ninjago god.

•still kinda frustrated that they are changing how elemental powers work. Originally they were from the first spinjitzu master, but the whole source dragon being the source (for lack of a better word) of the elemental powers, it completely retcons and nerfs the first spinjitzu master. It would have made more sense if they still came from the powers of the fsm and were gifted through the source dragons to people.

•the implication of the cursed realm merging with the rest of the realms brings up the question if the departed realm merged to? Does that mean no one can die??? Or is there some sort of force that still keeps the departed realm separated from the rest (like how the people in the land of the forgotten can’t leave) or can some dude just wander in to the departed realm and see like there dead grandma chilling with the fsm having tea or some crap like that.

•Lloyd going I forgot there are two of them now towards Kai and wyldfires antics is peak writing. And all the arson and explosions the two created is just beautiful.

•I think the Kai and wyldfire duo should be called like the arsonist or the kaboom duo

•THE HUGGG!!!! My boi was so happy looking when the tackle hug was done.

•I just cant get my brain to shut up about these two. They give off tired dad who sometimes gives in to his old chaotic ways he’s sworn he’s grown out of and living embodiment of chaos and fun daughter who drags her dad into crazy things.

Tdlr I loved this second half and had a few issues with it but it was still really good.

[zinnynia]

give ur opinions on every half life cast member go into details i want to see how ur brain functions

My opinion on the Half Life cast? I don’t have any/many opinions about most of them, so I’ll just not talk about those characters.

I’ll be going from least - most thoughts and opinions, starting with Lamarr.

Though, not really about Lamarr, but headcrabs in general. Out of every alien and enemy in Half Life, Headcrabs and Headcrab Zombies are the scariest to me. Idk man, they’re terrifying, and the concept itself is depressing.

D0g + Eli and Russell are all three very cute characters. I always love seeing them interact with Alyx, and their relationship with her is very sweet. D0g was made by Eli, and Alyx kinda just continued to add more to him, making him the D0g we all know and love. I haven’t completed my Half Life: Alyx run yet, but so far, Russell and Eli seem like really nice parental figures for her. Russell is funny, and has genuinely made me smile and enjoy his company in stressful situations, and Eli just seems like an overall great father. I think I have daddy issues.

I don’t really like Adrian. It’s not that I hate him, or like him at all. I mean, the art of him is kinda cute tbh, and maybe the angst and shit, but he doesn’t really hit the spot like Alyx, Gordon and Barney. I mean, his concept is kind of cool, I guess, but I really wish we could see more of him. Maybe in Half Life 3 (if it comes out), the G-Man could possibly use Adrian against Gordon, as sort of a way to “distract” the gang and make Adrian join the Combine ranks. ..I could be cooking some fanfic ideas for y’all, so PLEASEEE cook up some Combine Adrian AU fr fr. Make him hot too (I might have a thing for the Combine Ngl).

Alyx is girliepop. She ate, slayed, and left no crumbs. What I really like about her is that she doesn’t really idolize Gordon, like what most of the Resistance does. She treats Gordon like a normal human being, and has shown from time to time that she genuinely cares about him. I think she’s well written, but what I don’t really like is that she’s the “love interest” of Half Life. I don’t really think there needs to be romance, because the story is already pretty good. I also find Freemance kind of… iffy. Gordon kind of knew her when she was a baby, and I can’t imagine popping out 20 years later and some kid I knew started crushing heavily on me, or their dad starts shipping us together. But that’s controversial, and if you ship it, you do you. Not my business, and it’s all fictional. Plus, they’re both consenting adults, just the idea is kinda weird.

The G-Man’s concept really intrigues me, and I feel like a lot could be built off of him in Half Life 3 (if it ever comes out). I’ve written a Half Life OC kind of based around it, actually! Basically, the G-Man manipulates and uses resistance members to distract the gang, taking and stealing them, along with Alyx. This causes the gang to feel stressed and discouraged, hopeless even. Barney is nowhere to be found (he’s safe and untouched), so it’s just Gordon and Eli. I feel like a lot could be done with this, and builds more on the G-Man’s manipulative and antagonistic character. It would also be cool if the Combine joins forces with the gang, and defeat the G-Man, then agree on a truce, leaving Earth or co-exist together. I also just feel like I’m intrigued by the G-Man so much, mostly because I’ve written my story’s main antagonist similarity to the G-Man coincidentally.. and that’ll be a story for another post.

Last, but not least… Gordon and Barney omggg!!! Barney and Gordon are both my most favorite characters of Half Life, Barney especially. About a year ago, when I laid eyes on Barney, something inside of me literally just…. Clicked. I was like “I like this man. He’s my favorite character now.”

^^^ Pieces of artwork I made when I first got into Half Life))

I didn’t really understand it, until I really started to look into the fandom, realizing him and Gordon were best friends, and how he practically missed Gordon for 20 years, holding onto crowbars and thinking about the beer he owed Gordon. This REALLY hit me, as I’m in an oddly similar situation.

^^^ The him))

My childhood best friend and I were pretty close, despite knowing each other for only 2 years. We got split up, but met again, but never got the chance to reconnect and actually chat. But throughout the years, I always bought lockets, and sometimes items with sunflowers. Lockets, because he and I were BIG Undertale fans back then (also FNaF and Pokemon), and our parting gifts were paper heart lockets. Sunflowers, because of flower symbolism (wishful thinking, happiness, etc etc) and the idea of “Summer.” We always did everything together, like paper crafts. Another funny thing is that, after finding him again recently, our dynamic is somewhat similar to Freehoun in a way. Me being the more chatty one, while he’s a little more silent. My problem is that I'd rather hear him talk, because he’s really everything I’d want to talk about (no homo 4 him pls I swear). It’s also funnier that he’s a science guy and works out, and is taller than me. It’s giving……. Gordon to Barney.

It’s also funny that a lot of the fanfics I’ve read and liked remind me a lot of us. One fanfic had Gordon and Barney have a conversation, talking about how they can’t “resume” where things left off. That reminds me about a thing he told me one night, about how we weren’t the same people we were in 2nd and 3rd grade, but truthfully I didn’t love him (platonically) for who we were, but for who he is. On the topic of fanfics, I’ve written my fair share (2), and they’re all vents about him in the form of Freehoun! Though, they aren’t technically romantic, they could be interpreted as romantic.

^^^ Old artwork I made based off of my fanfic "Never Again."))

And speaking about Freehoun, I’m actually not much of a “Freehouner.” Sure, it’s cute, but I think they’re just really cute friends. The things they’d do in Black Mesa, and the beer. The way Barney looks at Gordon, and how upset his face was when he had to part ways in Episode 1. Anyways, it took me 7 years to finally have him back (technically 2 + 5, but we didn’t get time to really chat, so I add the 2 years), and I told him “I’d wait another 7 years if it means I’d get to talk to you again” and I also did kinda write him a 2 page (platonic) Valentines Letter that he DID kinda print out cus it was a google doc. Letters are kind of our thing, because I always gave him letters back then when I had a way to send them (via people/connections).

Plus, Gordon is kinda fine...... And Barney's really cute. Like??? PLEASEEEE who decided to make two good looking best friends like tf? And can we PLEASE TALK about how sad Barney looked at the end of Episode 1???? Shit still has be crying.

[shorthaltsjester]

you hit the nail on the head with my issues on their failure to address the groups dynamic with scanlan, bc the show paints it that the group still not caring much for scanlan isn’t even an issue, when all the other characters have had these moments of the group rallying behind them during their struggles, scanlan is just kinda left with “now i finally matter bc i have real family” and that’s kinda it?

and i think the vax and scanlan dynamic suffers greatly from this too bc literally last season ended with vax admitting he didn’t believe in scanlan (“i thought you’d run back there”) while scanlan stayed bc HE believed in VAX (“i don’t believe in that matron stuff but you do and i believe in you”) yet this season just reinforces that with no payoff. vax’s only acknowledgement of scanlan was “you’re rather quiet back me up here” and that’s IT, the group as a whole had a bigger reaction to keyleth and vax kissing than scanlan returning from his coma to help😭

i never expected bard’s lament to go exactly how it did on stream nor did i expect scanlan to fully even blow up at the group but my issue is that even if we’re exclusively looking at the show’s writing w/o c1 knowledge, they focus heavily on the development of scanlan’s devotion, that he starts off selfish and becomes someone who feels a sense of devotion and responsibility to multiple people, despite having this underlying feeling that no one cares for him and he doesn’t matter. and that arc and growth has been really amazing to see, but then why have all that development over 3 seasons if over half the people he’s become devoted to STILL don’t view him in a similar light? hell even him opening up about that a LITTLE bit was just used as an immediate transition to keyleth and vax announcing they’re going for keyleth’s aramente… anyway SORRY FOR RAMBLING IN YOUR INBOX and who knows what’s to come with season 4 but i just think it’s a lil ironic that the character who’s had built up self worth issues over feeling overlooked was just… extremely overlooked in the very arc that was supposed to address it.

oh anon. yeah yeah big agree to everythigg bc said . yeah . please do not apologize for rambling in my inbox it’s so very welcome (the delay in response is because sometimes i forget this thing exists and notifications are not friends of mine so apologies for That).

but no like. truly as my criticisms have grown for tlovm re: the reliance on a pre-existing care for the story being told even if you do not have pre-existing knowledge of the story itself for audience buy-in, scanlan has long been a strong rebuttal to my concerns about what the cost of a required lack of character depth might be in a story like tlovm where character depth is integral to the themes and the plot. because like you mention season 1 and 2 really do the work of setting up scanlan and all his flaws and his dynamic in the group and his inability to be genuine with them and the pain he therefore can’t really unpack With them. and then s3, in emphasizing so much the kaylie and scanlan dynamic, kind of loses sight (or maybe. gains sight — but i’ll get to that in a sec) of scanlan’s motivation for favouring kaylie so strongly over vox machina even in a time of turmoil (e.g., seeking her out rather than sticking with the group before whitestone — while he didn’t know about the attack, he Did know they were in the middle of Very Short Timeline End Of Dragon Fighting Urgency, his comment at the end of the season that kaylie is his Real family). and it also doesn’t use the group’s recognition of the fact that kaylie is this powerful force for scanlan at all since they don’t even know about kaylie until half way through the season and most of them don’t even get lines about the fact that scanlan is in a coma at all so. picking battles ig.

idk man it’s like. yeah i also didn’t expect a 1-for-1 bards lament and i actually agree with the sentiment that a perfectly written vox machina adaptation might not have any bards lament moment at all, but given the two seasons of character writing setting up the very same issues that amounted to bards lament in the campaign, there was a requirement for some release of that tension for a story that i would call well done, and, well. we got a calm and collected scene. for the sake of a happy and satisfying ending. in the vox machina show. yknow. based on a campaign notorious for its happy ending.

time doesn’t exist and i can’t remember if this ask was sent before or after the round table from my personal hell where sam explicitly said that most if not all of the scanlan and kaylie scenes were rewritten After Recording because it wasn’t until then that they’d realized what scanlan’s motivations were . that paired with the tlovm team talking about wanting to avoid cliffhangers at the end of s3 so not having bards lament but then still including a cliff hanger with the whispered one stuff. i will always enjoy tlovm because those are my blorbos made real with animation but. sometimes they are Not my blorbos sometimes they are bad iterations of them. it doesn’t matter that their creators are in the writers room if every messy part of the characters that make them compelling and humanizes them have been reduced until easy to swallow and wrap up with conveniently satisfactory end-of-season beats. i won’t call it objectively bad character writing (but i think it is) but i will say it has been extremely hard to get my non-critter/dnd friends who tend to enjoy stories for the characters in them to enjoy tlovm, since they almost always lose interest in characters they see as fairly flat with occasional bursts of depth that just highlight how flat they appear otherwise, and most of those friends have identified scanlan as a high point of the character writing. which is maybe why i find the choices around his arc deflation the most :/-inducing

[illiicits]

A year and a half

Hi everyone! This is my first cod work. I’ve played the game for years mostly multiplayer but I’ve always held the call of duty games close to my heart. I just found the tumblr side of cod and can I just say these works are 🥵 and very well written. So if you write thank you so much for giving me entertainment. Secondly, this is not proof read and the idea came randomly. I may make some more parts depending on if you guys like it. I’m thinking different months and some other issues thrown in with the Y/N life. The original story was going to be just college Y/N having to wait 6 months for ghost to come back and during the time he’s gone she starts classes back up. There would be a guy who crushes massively on Y/n and he’s always breaking boundaries. (No cheating, cause ew but I love civie Y/N trope). Let me know if you guys would want more.

Warnings: mention of sexual acts (nothing graphic i don’t think, kind of sad vibes, nicknames (babygirl, princess and love), idk any other warnings lol.

Word count: 1758 (something like that).

———————————————————————————————————————

The first day:

The light filtered through the closed curtains around the edges. It was barely noticeable but it definitely was there. You turned your head to look at the clock on your nightstand reading 5am. With a small sigh you turned to look up at the ceiling staring at it.

Closing your eyes and focusing on remembering the weight and warmth of the body lying next to you. Embedding the feeling and weight of the tattooed arm laying across your bare stomach. Your pointer finger lightly tracing the tattoo.

A soft deep groan escaped from Ghost, his arm laying across your body tightened around your bare torso, pulling you closer to his body.

You’ve been with the man for awhile now, but somehow knowing he’s stark bare and his legs are tangled with yours has a warmth heating your face and down your neck.

You knew he left love marks all over your body. You could feel them pushing in your skin as a reminder of yesterday.

Last night was different than the other times. He had been different. He was desperate and angry that he was leaving you so soon after he just got back months ago.

<————————————>

He had stormed his way into the front door of your shared home. He was grumbling to himself looking through the house to find you. It didn’t take him long for him to find you snuggled into a blanket on the couch watching some tv show he no doubt will have to listen to you talk about over and over again when something exciting happened, not that Ghost minded, he loved seeing you happy and excited about something.

You startled when you noticed movement out of the corner of your eye. Ghost is always so quiet on his feet, moving in complete silence even when he’s home.

“You scared the shit out of me baby” you said giggling at yourself. “I’m sorry my love.” Ghost replied pulling the blanket away from your body as he went to sit down on the couch next to you. He tugged your wrist lightly guiding you to sit on his lap. “I’m so sorry my love” Ghost started his voice deep and sad. “I tried everything to get out of it but they need me. The team needs me.” Ghost said softly moving a fallen hair back behind your ear.

Your stomach sank at his words and you stared at your hands that sat in your lap. “How long is it for this time?” You asked softly, holding back the lump in your throat. “Yo-you just got back though, can’t they send any other team?” You questioned Ghost stuttering a little, finally looking at his face. “About a year they are guessing but could be more”. He wrapped his arms around you and gave you a little squeeze. “I don’t want you to go… I- I don’t want- please don’t go.” You started crying, choking on the words. You pleaded with him not to go. You just got him back from the last mission.

How can you do a whole year? You missed him desperately already.

“I know baby girl, I know… shhh. It’s alright you’ll be okay I promise.” Ghost tried soothing you with hushes and kisses. He held you as you cried into his arms. He hates seeing you like this. “We won’t be able to talk at all during this mission. They strictly are cutting all outside communications. No cellphones, no computers, mail, emails or anything of the sort”. You sobbed harder little hiccups leaving your lips. Ghost stared at your wet cheeks and puffy red eyes. He leaned down and kissed each eye and then your nose. “I’m sorry my beloved.”

“We won’t be able to talk about anything for a whole year?” You cried out, the reality of what it would be like without talking to him for a year… how would it affect your relationship?

Ghost and you sat on the couch for a while cuddling and watching your tv show.

Before bed the energy had shifted. You had showered and came out in one of Ghosts black shirts, the fabric ended mid thigh. You had gotten in bed and his arms instantly wrapped around you pulling your body nice and close to his. He kissed you sweetly, innocently until he got bored of it and decided to escalate the situation. He had pulled you on top of his lap kissing you deeply and rubbing his hands all over your body.

That night ghost and you made love over and over again. Sweet and slow, fast, deep and desperate. He left love marks and bruises all over your body. Something about this time was different, the sex the night before, the way Ghost carried himself, the way he talked about the mission information, at least what he could tell you. Not being able to text, call or mail him anything hurt. That was what was different. Not texting or anything at all was different. He always made a little time to talk and text at least once a week.

<————————————————————>

You sigh as he finally woke up and kiss your cheek, staring into your eyes after. He watched as your beautiful bright eyes filled with sadness and tears. The morning had dragged on as you watched from the warmth of the bed.

Your eyes followed his movements as he threw on his boxers, followed by his black cargo pants with more pockets than he actually probably needs. Eyes lingered on his hands as he looped his belt and buckled it, the loud noise sounded deafening in the quiet of the room. He threw on a long black sleeve shirt. His dog tags hung around his neck.

Ghost could feel you watching his every movement. His heart is heavy at the inevitable time where you both go to base and you say goodbye to him for the next year or more.

He hated it.

At some point his packing was done and you found yourself behind the wheel of his car. One hand on the steering wheel and the other holding his hand in a death grip. You pulled up to the base gates watching as men in gear holding guns walked around your car, one with a dog. You handed over the id and information Ghost had handed you to the gentleman. They all stood a little straighter when the guy checking the information boomed out some information. The gate had opened in front of your car, you grabbed the information saying a small quick thank you to the man, driving off and into the direction Ghost told you.

You parked and tears filled your eyes a little, but you will yourself not to cry. Trying to hold back the lump threatening to spill out from your closed lips. Ghost jumped out of the car coming around to your side and opened the door for you. He took your hand in his lacing your fingers together. As he opened the back door, grabbing his duffel bags and throwing them over his shoulder.

He looked down at you, squeezing your hand in his once, twice, three times. A silent but meaningful message to you- I love you. You squeezed his hand back tighter, one, two, three, four; four times. A silent I love you too. You walked hand in hand into the building, dreading the moment where you can no longer pass through.

Loud laughter and booming voices filled the room. Men all dressed similar to your boyfriend stood in a group all with luggage and gear of their own. You don’t remember what any of Ghost’s squad members had said to you. Their voices went in one ear and out the other, your ears were ringing loud. Heat filling your face as it reddens and tears wet your cheek.

The time had come for them to leave.

With a heavy sigh leaving Ghost lips, he turned to look at you, grabbing your forearms and pulling you tightly into an embrace as you let out a quiet sob.

Ghost held you in his embrace squeezing you tightly as his one hand cupped the back of your head and ran his rough fingers over your soft hair. Ghost lifted the mask to uncover his lips. He rests his cheek against the top of your head every so often to kiss it. “You’ll be alright, love” Ghost whispered to you. “And- and I’ll be fine too. I promise I’ll be- I’ll be safe” he promised. “As safe as I can be princess.”

His promises didn’t ease the pain and worry that was already starting to fill your head. You pulled back and looked up into his eyes. His eyes normally masked with light emotions that for strangers would be there and then gone in a flash, but with you, you could read his eyes something that bothered Ghost sometimes. Eyes locked on eyes; you stared into them, Watching the small amount of water that made his eyes glossy pool in the corner but he didn’t dare let them fall.

He was sad and he was sorry.

You knew he was, but none of the words he whispers to you and no matter how many promises he makes, nothing will change the feeling sinking into the depths of your mind, heart and stomach. You appreciated the effort though. Giving Ghost a soft smile and getting on your tippy toes to kiss him.

“I love you.” Ghost whispered against your lips while his arms wrap around your waist pulling you up off the ground and squeezing you to him.

“I love you too.” You whispered back tears falling down your cheeks making your kiss salty.

“Let’s go, Ghost!” Price yelled from down the hall. “Give her a kiss and hug from the squad too.” He yelled down the hall; Hollers and whistles followed after the 141 cheering at prices words.

Chuckling Ghost let you back on your feet, slipping his body away and grabbing his bags he discarded on the floor.

One quick kiss to your lips and cheek.

“I’ll be back in a year, love.” Ghost spoke softly, a promise lingering in the tone of his voice. “Be good, and stay safe princess.”

A smile broke through your grim expression.

“I will.” You promised.

“You better come home to me Simon Riley.” You told me.

“Always.” He replied with a wink; then he turned, tugging his bags on his shoulder and walked down the hallway towards his squad mates.

That was the start of a year and a half with out him.

[spiderpussinc]

I don’t think it’s very fair for you to try and knock others from reading Miguel’s OG run because truthfully that’s the only place you’re going to get his full character since every run after that is just “Let’s place him in different time scenarios to fix other people’s problems”. I’ve read ur reasonings and some of the issues I just don’t see and that’s coming from someone who’s ALSO half Hispanic and had similar family experiences. Idk I guess comic Miguel is rlly important and relatable to me and you shouldn’t turn others away from having that potential connection too. :/

NAH LOL it is *not* the only place to get his character truthfully -- his character is not consistent between runs, or between comic and movie! Not even Pdavid's runs have an unified version of Miguel since he just becomes an author self-insert after one point. The way Pdavid writes '92 Miguel - Gabriel is also shamelessly almost the same as he wrote Bruce Banner - Rick Jones. (another series where he ended up being pushed off the book after he started making really weird decisions; and notice these last two are white guys, which is how pdavid depicts Miguel all the time.)

I haven't even told people to not read them. In multiple posts i say 'read the first ones to see how it is, stop when you get annoyed, look up summaries, don't feel obligated to treat it as canon because it isn't.' If anyone feels threatened by this they should examine where that defensiveness is coming from.

I'm gonna be real with you that's like saying "the only way to REALLY understand Miles Morales is to read his ultimates run." You know, the one where his mother gets eaten alive by Venom, his dad thinks he's at fault for killing her and nearly beats him with a cane, where the closest thing he has to peter is a clone named jessica drew, and that eventually gets completely retconned in a universe explosion so main universe Miles can be rewritten. Do you remember seeing any of the things above in ITSV? Would you call them *the only real way to fundamentally understand Miles as a character?*

I keep seeing the rhetoric that 'real fans' have to subscribe to the very first script of these characters and that somehow enjoying their ATSV versions is fake-stanning and that is just... not true. That's not how comics work. Our most iconic, definitive, memorable traits for MANY of these superheroes have come from subsequent comic runs, rewrites, feats of adaptation and the interaction between fanwork-becoming-canon. Even uncle Ben's 'power and responsibility' schtick is NOT an original part of Peter's first draft. That came from re-imaginings and rewrites.

I'm really, truly not a fan of the argument that 'relating to parts of a character' completely absolves the text from criticism. It's not a good comic. It barely tries to be latino rep and frankly, I'm not going to praise it for just placing a label on him and doing nothing with it. I don't care for this white man's truth. It's racist and creepy and I should be paid reparations for having to read a storyline where the same girl gets paired up with two different brothers and then their father just to end up getting killed for a sexier token love interest. I am constantly frustrated by the argument that new fans should be forced to read it and potentially get turned away from comics forever; it's one of the worst offerings you could give them. 90's Marvel and DC are a public fandom joke and nearly led the market into bankruptcy!!!!! (Marvel filled for loss in 1996. IT WAS BAD. That's part of why the whole 2099 line went up in flames! The money was going down the drain.)

I've been a comic reader for a long time and I just can't give them blissful innocence passes like that. The current editor-in-chief at Marvel did yellowface and pretended to be a japanese man for years to write some shitty superhero weeb comics with no accountability whatsoever. He still has a job. RUNNING the company!

And here's the thing: I like Miguel too. I have a shitty family and I empathize with that but I KNOW he deserves much better than to be confined by white people's scripts and fetishes. I *want* him to have a chance, multiple chances even, to be completely rewritten and remolded by latine voices without the need for them to constantly refer or tie back into that white man's work; It is our right just as any other.

ATSV throws away most of Miguel's baggage, and straight up refuses to refer to the weird indepth sludge pdavid had going on; the artbook doesn't mention these first comics or most of his runs, they actually talk about other groundbreaking sci-fi concept work and the idea of basically rebuilding the landscape from scratch, and I am deeply thankful they do that. One of the biggest themes of the movie *is* that the idea of comic canon is fraught and full of holes, and that we should subvert it into joyful and honest expressions of these characters' cultures. These are movies that begin with the Comics Code Authority stamp, a censorship marker that among other things explicitly prohibited the positive depiction of pro-civil rights narratives and homosexual relationships, and actively turned their nose at protagonist black characters — & proceed to rip it to shreds. That's what we should be doing!

[koishikomeijiofficial]

like let me put it all out there

until dawn is a shit excuse for a game and if you’re a fan i don’t like. hate you or anything. but i certainly don’t trust your taste in media.

i’ll start immediately with the racism. the use of native american folklore as a spooky scary plot line is already annoying as fuck, but to do it in the way supermassive does is just irresponsible. for one, just saying the creature’s name out loud MULTIPLE times despite one of the most important things being that even uttering its name invites some Real Bad Shit, yet you’re telling me this old man with a flamethrower that is supposedly native himself and an expert on these creatures would just??? carelessly say it over and over and over again? again, he’s supposed to be an expert and also native. he should KNOW to keep his mouth shut when it comes to just saying the creature’s name. and on top of that, you’re really telling me This Expert Man would die THAT easily by running after he’s just finished telling another character that the creatures can’t see you if you stand still. now let me state ahead of time that i’m white, so i do not have the experience of native people having their folklore yoinked and mishandled like this, and people who are you are free to correct me on anything i get wrong. i just feel like the handling of the creature and its lore and just kind of…. making up things (like the motion based movement) is so shitty and irresponsible. when you’re handling something like this that has significant meaning to people, you need to handle it with the utmost care and respect. there is no respect in until dawn. also worth mentioning is that the existence of the creatures feels like a half-assed secondary plot line; josh’s dumb bullshit couldn’t make a long enough game apparently, so they had to stretch it out by putting in some random Spooky Scary Monster. they’re two completely different stories that are barely connected, and the connection in the first place is flimsy as fuck

also your choices Don’t Matter. the game wants you to believe sooooo bad that choices matter, but the story doesn’t change no matter who lives or dies. the only change you experience is the interviews at the end. the story itself doesn’t change. any character who is able to be killed just stops being important or even relevant to the story at the first instance of them possibly dying because idk these devs couldn’t be bothered to properly branch anything. every scene is the same no matter who’s there. the choices get you the same reactions from the characters no matter what you do.

also. the fact that a completely innocuous choice can change whether matt wastes the flare gun on his own or not???? that’s complete bullshit. just say you hate your players.

until dawn as a game also just makes me sick. the constant jumpscares aren’t scary, they’re just fucking annoying and badly done, and the sickness doesn’t come solely from the gore, but the way it’s handled; every death except one or two is via head trauma. decapitation is all over the place, head squashing, face smashing, eye stabbing, etc etc there is just WAY too much for me to see it as scary deaths. it feels more like the devs have a massive decapitation fetish. it’s just torture porn. if i wanted torture porn i’d go read a mid rated hentai. the obsession w heads also carries over into their other games, but it’s at its most egregious here in UD. the drawn out heads getting ripped off, the lingering camera on the heads dropping to the floor with the expressions changing, its past the point of horror and firmly in the camp of Devs Obviously Jerking It To This Shit.

also if you praise anything about the gameplay i want to study you under a microscope. WHAT fucking gameplay? you just walk around, pick things up very slowly, and press buttons sometimes. yes there are good games that are just walking simulators, but my issue with UD is that it’s being advertised as this great “butterfly effect” horror adventure where choices matter and that it was exciting and fun. it is None of those things. “butterfly effect” is just a fancy way to say “we made a bunch of choices that didn’t actually matter but we want you to fall for it anyway”. there is nothing exciting about it. you don’t run from things, you don’t chase anything, you just slowly walk and sometimes hit a QTE. a walking sim indie game that tells me it’s a walking sim with a story is always going to rate higher in my books than a “game” whose advertising is a complete and utter lie.

this series of videos hits on a lot of these points and i recommend them wholeheartedly

tl;dr until dawn is a bad game and if you enjoy it you’re not terrible but you’re also ignoring a lot of passive problems and also racism. the racism is pretty bad. and so is the egregious decapitation fetish

[nosleep83]

ROTTMNT SEASON 3 IDEAS!!!!!

(These are really messy cause I mostly just copy and pasted from my notes haha)

First of all, the main antagonist.

I think that the main antagonist for season 3 should definitely be the sister Kraang (I’ll be referring to her as Kraang 3 or just Three). Remember, she’s still alive. She’s only being contained. And considering how it only took 3 Kraangs to nearly take over all of New York, I think Three would be able to escape from any earthly containment. She also just has amazing potential to be a main villain. She’s definitely the most psychotic out of the 3 Krangs (Hell, the first thing she wanted to do when she was freed from the prison dimension was kill something) and loves to see people suffer. I could bring up many other times she’s acted like a psychopath but I don’t have time for that lol.

As for her motive, she didn’t seem hellbent on conquering Earth like her brother, she mainly just liked to cause pain. And with her brothers gone I don’t think she’d make it a priority to conquer Earth, at least not quite yet. I think all she wants is revenge. She’d want to torment anyone and everyone who messed up their invasion. And we all know who ruined the invasion…

Another thing is just how horrifying it would be for everyone to know Three is out there and wants revenge. They’ve all already been VERY traumatized by the Kraang and the invasion, and to have to go up against one AGAIN when they thought everything was okay and that they’d gotten rid of the Kraang for good would be insanely traumatizing. Basically I just want more trauma lmao.

I think it would be interesting if Three started becoming more present gradually throughout the season. Sort of like in Thanks To Them, how the entire time there was a build up toward Belos possessing Hunter at the end of the episode. I think it would be interesting if, as the episodes progressed, there would be more hints that Three is back. Maybe an episode about half way through the season it would finally be revealed to the turtles somehow (maybe they find her or it’s on a news report or smth idk)

Anyways moving on from the antagonist I want to see how everyone is doing after the invasion and how they’re each individually dealing with it. I want to see how Casey Jr is doing adapting to a normal life with the younger versions of his family and grieving the ones he knew. I want to see how Raph is handling being possessed and the guilt he more than likely has from hurting his family and helping the Kraang. I want to see how Leo is dealing with the trauma of being in the prison dimension and nearly (accidentally) causing an apocalypse. Obviously, I want to see how Mikey and Donnie are doing after the invasion as well, it would feel wrong if their trauma from the event was ignored, but I just can’t think of anything for them right now. My brain is tired haha.

The turtles’ issues and trauma, even from before the movie, just need to be addressed more. Don’t get me wrong, it’s not like the writers did a bad job with their struggles. They did great, I just think more time was needed to talk about their issues more in depth. Another thing is that some of the turtles’ issues are talked about more than others. For example, we needed more time to see how Mikey feels like his brothers need to protect him because he’s the youngest and such. This part can mainly be summed up to me thinking we needed more time with each turtle.

Also I just want more of the side characters, man. Characters like Sunita needed much more episodes. I already enjoy the side characters, I just think getting to know them more would make me enjoy them more yk.

WE NEED MORE CASSANDRA. PLEASE. We didn’t get to see much at all of Cass being a good guy, and I’d just really like to see it. I would also LOVE to see her and Casey Jr interact and see what kind of dynamic they’d have.

Splinter’s neglect needs to be addressed more and he really needs to work on it more. I already now that throughout the series he gets better, but he still has so much making up to do. I want to see the turtles be really upset with him. To be hurt by the lack of attention he gave them. Raph in particular was arguably affected the worst by Splinter’s neglect (since he’s the oldest) and I’d love to see Raph talk to him about that.

Now, the most important part. WE NEED USAGI. We need rottmnt Leosagi I’m dying on this hill. Now that might just be me hoping since when it comes to gay relationships Nickelodeon usually doesn’t go farther than gay parents but hey, if The Owl House could do it, I’m sure if Rottmnt really tried they could too.

Anyways that’s all lmao thanks for reading all of this :] feel free to tell me your thoughts about it!

[my-castles-crumbling]

Hi Cas!!! It’s wedding anon. Real quick, CONGRATULATIONS! My partner and I are both young teachers, and I have to say, i’m SO happy for you. My fiancé moved schools after they treated them badly, and didn’t allow her to use Mx. instead of Ms. (which is really important to them). 

Idk if you’re still taking advice, and i’m from England so there’s definitely some differences, but I teach 11-16 yr olds and honestly?

I’ll always say the best thing to do is be on their side. If they get caught in a hallway, oh they’re on their way to me. If they’re uniform is wrong (idk if it’s non uni in the US but like, breaking uniform rules) then I already punished them and they can’t change it (jewellery wont come off/don’t have spare clothes). If they’re eating in classes, yeah i told them, i’ll talk to their teacher. 

Obviously you have to be careful with serious issues but the silly small rules really freak out the youngest years and really piss off the oldest years. As long as you have boundaries to how far you’ll help them, say for example, any kids can always come to my room and chill out- but if they make anyone uncomfortable they are not welcome back. 

Also at my school there’s big queues for lunch, but you can get an early lunch pass to skip it. There’s a kid in my tutor base (idk if you have those) whose friends all have early passes for dinner cause of a club. So I gave her one so she can eat with them and then come to my classroom and do her homework. 

Oh and try to not set group tasks with a fixed number of people. If you’re alright with it, all group activities go better when they’re with friends. Especially at that age. But not if you limit the number. “It’s supposed to be two, but i’ll allow three.” “Groups of four, yeah okay you guys can be a five.” As long as they DO the work, it’s easier for everyone. 

(And when they’re dicks, remember that they’re learning from their parents and the internet. It’s not their fault. I know you know that, but the most important thing at that age is more than one second chance. Cause they’re gonna be teal annoying basically all the time) 

ANYWAY- there’s a new development you WONT believe. 

Also, WOW, your mum tried to wear a wedding dress to YOUR wedding, damn you really get it then 😭

(Oh god I haven’t even begun to worry about what she’ll wear if she comes).

I feel like parents get a free hand at  being a dick more than others, but for good reason. My mum sacrificed so much for me, and grew up in a totally different way than I did. I don’t blame her for her attitude, but I’m getting a little sick of the guilt tripping.

I stopped going to church every weekend during university (once i moved out) about six years ago, and my mum DROVE UP to my dorm and sat me down and gave me a three hour speech about how she CANNOT STAND me not going to church cause then i’ll go to hell and she just wants me not to go to hell and why don’t I just go to church and pray to god so that she can know I won’t go to hell.

And not to get into a thing- but the reason i’m against being a christian is because of christian’s. Like it’s fine if you decide the way you live is what will get you into your heaven, but like- don’t act like everyone else you meet who also isn’t a devote christian is going to go straight to hell. In fact, trying to decide who does and does not go to hell feels incredibly not christian. 

Anyway, as you can see I have a complicated relationship with my mother and with religion. So I sat my mum down yesterday and told her that I want nothing more than her at my wedding, and that i’ll happily take whatever suggestions she has, but that where I get married has to be up to me and partner. I also tried to explain that we literally CANNOT marry in a catholic church due to their rules but she just yelled more about our queer marriage. 

At one point she said “since your wife is only half a women can’t she just become a man for your wedding” and then she had to sit through my own thirty minute speech about how to not devalue my partners identity… but like- can trans people marry in catholic church’s if they’re just a straight couple and the trans person just doesn’t tell anyone???? I feel their system is flawed. ANYWAY. 

She’s not coming. She won’t be at a wedding “facilitating the devil”… WE’RE GAY, by her standards just standing next to my partner is “facilitating the devil”.

I know her tones though, I think she’s gonna change her mind. 

So my dad hasn’t been around much of my life. He’s coming to the wedding only if my mum is. I don’t really care whether he’s there or not. I’ve already told him he’s not walking me down the aisle. He doesn’t give a shit (he never has). He’ll show up if my mum does, or not if she doesn’t. 

(It’s a long story but when I was in second year at university, I lost my campus dorm… and this annoying bartender guy took me in when I almost became homeless and cooked me food and stuff and like- he’s my dad now, i’m a found family girlie). 

ANYWAY. So yeah, but he’s also super catholic. So he, who doesn’t give a shit about ANYTHING, who never supported my mum, who laughed when I told him I was engaged cause he NEVER KNEW i’d been dating my partner… of five years. HE wants to find me a wedding venue. And this isn’t to be nice by the way, it’s to exert his power in any way he still can. 

And naively I had thought maybe he was being nice. BUT THAT PROVED NOT TRUE. Just… let me build up to saying this… 

So my sister has helped me find actual potential churches that would accept our marriage (“only if YOU want, don’t listen to mum”) and my dad has… are you ready… PUNCHED A FUCKING REVEREND. 

Yep you heard that right.

And NOT because he was homophobic. 

No no, they were ALREADY mocking me and partner, saying how funny it was that we were going to hell for BEING US. 

No, he punched our CHILDHOOD churches reverend (not the same person we had back then but still) because he has the audacity to call my dad a BAD father and husband for- everything (apparently my dad got to gossiping with him about cheating on my mum, and that time he hit me, and that time he smashed a beer bottle over my sisters cat).

You forget how psycho your family is when you’re away for so long (I know my sister forgot too) until your back. Around them again. 

But ANYWAY. He’s sort of invited. He’ll either come with my mum if she comes. Or not if she doesn’t. I don’t care if he’s there. Unless he punches someone again, i’ll probably never even notice him. 

The funny thing about all of this is, while yes a venue is one of the most important things, we’re not actually getting married until January 2026, that’s like a year and a half away (my partners always wanted a winter wedding cause they’re fucking adorable). 

Anyway, that’s the update. A year and a half until my wedding and my dads punching reverends and my mums yelling about the devil. 

I shouldn’t have invited them.

Hi hon!

Thank you so much for the advice, I really appreciate it. I'm definitely going to keep all of that in mind.

As far as your update- OH MY GOD

Well, I am SO proud of you for standing up to your mum. That's NOT easy. And your dad sounds...wow. But I'm glad your sister is being so supportive!

But I do want to say- I think you were right to invite them. And the reason is because if you chose not to invite them, you would never know if they would be supportive or not. You would be assuming the worst. But by inviting them, you're giving them the choice to be supportive, and you're assuming the best. Is it going to hurt if they don't show? Absolutely. But now you know that they chose to not be supportive. And that was them. Does that make sense?

But again, I am so proud of you for standing your ground and standing up to your parents. And for defending your partner when needed! You're amazing <3

[theinsanecrayonbox]

X-Force #48 time!

Spoilers: Arkady has no lines, but isn’t knocked out for the remainder of the arc and/or dead

Got to love how everyone else’s line art from later in the issue icon boxes are somewhat dignified, but Arkady’s is him getting shot. He’s got better panels later here geeze. Also thanks for the reminder of when in the timeline this is since publishing books in order is for nerds apparently.

So it starts with Beast breaking into the Green House to steal…

A vegan mech suit…ok…

Sage ran off to protect something else though, so the rest of X-Force (minus Ark since he got knocked out because Beast really hates him for some reason) watched Beast ft off with said suit. What was she protecting? A Beast clone.

So it’s time for a team meeting! The clone has memories up until the 80s for some reason (why keep copies of memories that are incomplete?? The point of the memory copies was so the respawns would be up to date so when you died on your missions they’d replace you without anyone noticing a difference). The idea is to wake up the cane and pick it’s brain to help them stop Beast Prime. Not everyone is on board with this idea for very valid reasons.

Once again Sage is the only one who cares about the fact that Beast keeps murdering Arkady

Anywhos, they go to wake the clone

Again Sage being the one to use the brain cell…however it’s interesting that they give a specific time stamp for Beast 2’s memories. New Defenders #142 came out in 1985; when did everyone on X-Force first appear;

Interesting, he’s only be potentially familiar with half of them.

Anyways, clone wakes up, little fight, he says the catch phrase…and I admit I heard it in the 90s animated voice from then on, which I have not heard any of the war criminal diatribes. Tom is put in babysitting duty. Beast 2 breaks containment then googled himself to find out how evil Beast Prime has been, so he runs away…probably to go hook up with Wonderman if the cover to the next issue is anything to go by.

Now, I’m split at the moment about this. It feels like a cop out to have a new younger/not evil Beast that will probably stay around after we kill off the evil one and then pretend it never happened. The trend of doing this is really annoying. Sure no one liked this twist yo evil, but it happened and it mattered to the overall story, and shouldn’t be ignored. Could this be a great parallel storyline about how Beast 2 has to work to repent for things he never did but everyone still sees him as a villain, thus mirroring what the other reformed villains are put through; oh heck yeah but it probably won’t. Because everyone wants him to be good again and doesn’t want to see him bad; it’s why Wolverine can get away with murder but Sabretooth can’t lead a team with good intentions. Writers these days don’t care about overall character growth and the world advancing as a whole, they only focus on the story they want to tell at that moment and don’t bother considering how it affects other parts

So idk. Arkady probably won’t get to kill the man who keeps murdering him, so whatever I guess. At least we know who survives the arc I guess.

[sweetsmalldog]

Castlevania: Nocturne Episode 6 liveblog

While the episode is loading I read the synopsis and hope Sypha or Trevor get mentioned if not by name by Sypha being how the Belmonts got Speaker Magic

Oooh moon

DROLTA!!!!

This is my favorite Drolta outfit now I love the blood red coat with the white pants

Idk what the horses are doing

Oh is that the Messiah?

Drolta’s hair looks so good

She’s got daddy issues for the fucking sun

Oh this poor lady

The shot of the snow white skirt spread around them while she drinks that poor woman’s blood is absolute cinema

“Please call me anything but grandad” This man has given me Trevor vibes if Trevor was old the whole time maybe it’s just a Belmont thing

Ritcher deserves these answers actually yeah why was his mom sending him to Tera and not you old man?!?!

I take back what I said about him having Trevor vibes Trevor was funny even when he was depressed at least

A deal?!?!?!

So you’re a stalker old man

It is a bit creepy

Tera has a lot to tell both these kids

What is it with the Belmont family always been alone and when they have family not being one

How many “Last of the Belmonts” has their been at this point?

I feel so bad for Maria and Ritcher. Tera is all they had and now they find out she’s been keeping this kinda of stuff from them, straight up lying to Maria about her dad and agreeing to never let Ritcher know his grandfather was alive and around

YOU OWE HIM SOME FUCKING BIRTHDAY PRESENTS YOU ASS

Ritcher my boy I’m adopting you too actually all your guardians keep hiding important shit, You and Maria are my kids now. Tera can visit but you don’t half to see her if you don’t want to

“Your a Belmont your not supposed to hide in a hut. And you’re not supposed to kill vampires for money” FUCKIN TELL HIM RITCHER

SYPHA MENTION LETS GOOOOOOOOOOOOO

“And she left you out” that’s so cold I love it

“I was the best magician the Belmont line ever produced” yeah and Sypha would be so disappointed in you now

Oooh this is why Ritcher can’t do magic either shit

“Evil will always win, Ritcher” ONLY WITH THAT FUCKING ATTITUDE

I hope Ritcher figures out how to use his magic again, I hope he proves his grandfather fucking wrong

Please don’t give into this Ritcher please

My son nooooooo

He looks far to fucking happy about Ritcher sobbing I fucking hate this guy actually

Ooooh Annette’s doing magic!!!!

Ritcher isn’t useless he’s just traumatized

“It’s the source of your fury but it’s not the source of your power” that’s such a good line holy shit

I love this contrast between Ritcher’s grandfather tearing Ritcher and the idea of the Belmont’s down with Annette’s mentor builds her up, speaks of her ancestors well and their strength and how hope isn’t lost

“There is light in this darkness”

Edouard voice coming in ;-;

Hi Olrox!

Why do they keep killing all the gay people?

It’s a bit soon to talk about immortality together Mizrak

“I’m not in love with you” damn ok

YOOO THEY REMEMBER!!!! ISACC WAS ALWAYS RIGHT HE KNEW HE KNEW!!!!

NIGHT CREATURE REBELLION LETS GO PLEASE

Maria my daughter he sucks he isn’t worth your time

I fucking hate the Abbot so fucking much

MARIA RUN GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN PLEASE

Olrox ripping this entire facade down I knew there was a reason I liked you

Hiiiiii Drolta <3

Please don’t hurt my daughter Drolta

NIGHT CREATURE REBELLION!!!!

OH FUCK OFF OLD MAN LIKE YOU CARE

Oh Ritcher-

Yeah you were a terrible father you fuck

DID HE JUST LEAVE HIS GRANDSON TO DIE?!?!?!

OH FUCK ITS THE GUY DROLTA WAS HANGING OUT WITH

IS HIS AXE A GUN?!?!?! THATS SICK

The old man is actually just pathetic ok

The flash of Julia fuuuuuuuck

Why don’t the vampires ever try to turn any of the Belmonts?

If Maria dies I will be distraut

HIS MAGIC IS BACK!!!!!!!!!!!! LETS GO RITCHER!!!!!!!!

THIS IS SO SICK!!!! THE ONE GLOWING EYE THE MUSIC CINEMA!!!!!

THE BLUE FLAMES!!!!!!

LETS FUCKING GO RITCHER LETS FUCKING GOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I may have a new favorite Belmont… sorry Trevor

“I half to live”

The sun rising and the burning river and the headband flowing in the wind I fucking love Castlevania this is so damn pretty

[icharchivist]

you ever get a compliment so specific on your field of study that all you can do is cry

I haven’t really kept up to date with my life on here bc things have been messy but this year i’ve been trying to finish up my uni diploma, which i had left in pause for years because health issues, esp mental health, just made it impossible for me. One of the class i still had to pass was English Literature analysis for this semester, because of a mix of “i can’t process all of those texts” and the fact it was an oral analysis presentation and my social anxiety had kicked up so badly those past few years that any physical presentation led me to such mental states crumbling that i just mostly didn’t manage to finish it up.

the oral was today, i’ve been stressed for weeks about it, i didn’t read half of the recommended texts, i don’t remember half of the lessons i did participate in, and i was so panicked i couldn’t bring myself to study at all, those past few weeks have kinda been a stressful nightmare on that point

I still managed to push myself to go to the exam (major upgrades on the last time i tried to pass it), despite an awful night and the fact i have constant dizzy spells these days (probably bc of stress)

turns out not only i was getting interrogated on the subset of the class that i didn’t vibe with at all/am not at ease at all, but i fell on a text we studied in class when i was sick, and therefore, it was legit my first time seeing the poem at all.

so i go in, lacking all sort of confidence, thinking to myself i mostly just need to show i was here and i’ll still validate the year with that. I try to yolo an interpretation of the poem as i can.

Only so that at the end of the presentation the teacher tells me it was incredible, that this interpretation was really good, and when i mentioned i was really uncomfortable because i actually didn’t know the text at all, she told me it’s even MORE impressive that this is what i came up on my own in 30 minutes. She then asked me if i was pursuing further degree in literature because i “clearly have a gift” for analysis and was disappointed when i said no because she said i would really bring something to the field.

i was panicked for weeks over all of that and now i got this compliment and i cannot process it properly, i’ve been crying for the past half hour or so

I genuinely lack so much confidence in my analysis in general (despite trying to hold up the appearance that i’m actually super confident, promise! any confidence you see on this blog is me lying through my teeth) so being told that by a professional on the field is just. oh god. 

anyway idk if i’ll manage to process more brainpower for today but for now i’ll just stay in a state of limbo a moment over the most specific compliment i could get on something i genuinely care about to start with.

man.