#hajime post lobotomy

[loquaciousscribe]

Izuru Kamukura with Ultimate Adventure! Reader. Reader is badass and know what to do… and yep, they gonna do cool stuffs like having so much many ideas. They are basically ISTP.

gave me a stroke trying to read that

IZURU KAMUKURA ♡ ULTIMATE ADVENTURER! READER

he would like to listen to stories of your adventures because they're somewhat entertaining, even though he can predict almost everything that happens

he can be kinda a buzzkill, because that's just his nature, but you surprise him sometimes(not that much still though)((maybe turning to despair might surprise him?))

when you're not describing adventures that he knows he can never accompany you on, you're picking his brain, asking questions to figure out how his brain ticks(think hajime and nagito kinda)

you're observant enough to tell when he's bored[er..?] of whatever you're doing and switch it up. he notices and almost makes a game of it, seeing how fast you could change subject

i struggle to say if this relationship would actually be romantic or not, at most y'all aren't official but hang out a lot

junko kinda gets in the way with all the despair stuff

feeling angsty and low-key kinda want to say junko kills you(or rather makes him kill you) so he can feel despair, but idk how well that would work,,, so i'll leave you with that

if you don't somehow die, and instead turn to despair then you'd end up cooped up in some room, or glued to junko's hip because that would cause the most despair

doomed romance:(

hopefully this wasn't terrible, went down more of an angsty route.. obviously

[hermitsdump]

I love conversations w my bestie hatsune miku but

Now I read all my messages immediately after they send

in sukuna's voice

or just. Imagining him saying these things is so ajshchsksmcjskd

[beelas-bees]

[grabs hajime hinata and stuffs him in my pocket] oh this? this is my character now. yeah, I own him.

[opensesamepandemonium]

#6

Hajime Hinata x Nagito Komaeda - Danganronpa 2: Goodbye Despair (+ general Danganronpa franchise)

Taking the pinacle place of all the SDGR ships, (but 6th for me) is of course, Komahina.

I will be the first to admit I was a late-comer to the unbridled madness that is the Komahina fandom. This is mainly because it took two full play-throughs of SDGR2 and help from some magnicifent authors on AO3, to change my mind about Hajime being a 'meh' protagonist and Nagito being a straight up psychotic lunatic (although that kinda still tracks..)

Apart from the blatant marketing and writing to make these protag/antag boys an obvious yaoi ship, the deeper you delve into understanding Nagito and Hajime as individual characters, the more that their relationship makes sense. (TLDR: their outlooks on what hope/talent/self worth etc was completely changed because they met one another. and its kinda beautiful).

Like a few ships on this list, the pairing is a wee bit toxic. Although to be fair, a lot of that is due to their faults as individual characters. *ahem* Nagito low key being all g with murder if its for the sake of hope - meanwhile - Hajime being 'oh yeah cool, lobotomy all the way' *ahem*. Nagito also would straight up worship Hajime post NWP, which has similar unhealthy vibes to another pair I will talk about later on.

AND let us never forget that gay lil "uwu i'm all tied up! you're gonna have to feed me, Hajime~~!" scene. Nagito knew exactly what he was doing; that boy is a straight up hoe.

Art by: Gothcowboyz

[thekamukuraproject]

I am very obsessed with Izuru but I have only recently grown okay with Izuru and Hajime as the same person but only in a particular way...

Because I hate when Hajime and Izuru are seen as the same and completely interchangeable. I often see people frame it like Hajime is just acting weird or that Izuru is just like a parasite in his brain and he's cured post sim and I've always despised that. It makes it sound like nothing mattered. Like all that heavy brain alteration did nothing because of a virtual reality. Y'know, despite the brain being so unbelievably sensitive to manual changes that neurosurgeons have to keep a patient awake during the procedure to ensure they don't accidentally fuck everything up immensely.

And the stuff about Hajime being "suppressed" irks me.. Like he's there trying to get out or his consciousness is asleep. It sounds like brainwashing. And that's just not how that works. It's not what happened. Hajime underwent surgery and they slowly snipped away his neural connections to his memories, reactions, and other behaviors. That does sound extremely sifi and silly but it's possible!.. Partly. MRI's can see what areas in the brain light up and respond to certain associations and those areas can be severed. It's not perfect but it can do a lot of the heavy lifting when the scientists at Hope’s Peak want as much of Hajime gone as possible.

Hajime is not Izuru. That makes it sound like Hajime, who remembers everything that has ever happened to him and who remembers the people in his life and the things he cared about, it makes it sound like he's still there. He isn't. He's a changed irrepairable person. It is more accurate to say Izuru is Hajime, which admittedly sounds exactly the same with just the names switched but it is FAR better to interpret it as I think.

Izuru is Hajime because Hajime is just the face and body and later on the residual memories that the sim was able to piece back together (note that the pieces with those neural connections weren't removed. It wasn't really a lobotomy. Nothing was removed. So the simulation, assuming it took subconscious memories and brought them more closely to the "surface" of the subconscious to fix the brainwashing. Hajime's neurons could, theoretically, still be kicking and working in there to make a neural map I guess) Izuru is Hajime because he was made to be a husk filled with only Talent and other natural human bits a brain needs to survive, and by the end of the Kamukura Project, Izuru is only Hajime by name. A name that Izuru doesn't remember or need because it's for a boy who let himself die in the desperate attempt to feel important and worth something to himself. And so the name is gone too soon enough.

But if Izuru is a Hajime who was forced to forget his name, family, friends, and just everything that he cared for in his life...Why would he so easily gain everything about himself back after a really intense simulation? I can understand parts of what was Hajime very gradually returning because that is something the brain can do. Like if you get tetanus you'll become paralyzed and the only way to *not* be paralyzed anymore is for you to either not have had tetanus or for your brain to grow around the blockages and create new connections so your brain can communicate with the rest of your nervous system but this process takes months or sometimes even years to recover from. Something like brain surgery is going to have long last effects regardless of the simulation.

If Hajime did regain his thoughts and opinions and memories, wouldn't he be so irreparably changed? The fact he had brain surgery preformed on him cannot be denied. There are canon images detailing it. Izuru can try to regain their identity back but so much is irrepairable it'd probably hurt far less to just make a new identity... Or honor the identity that was abandoned when Hajime's life was nearly eradicated.

For those who have ever read Piranesi. It would be so so similar to that ending with Matthew Rose Sorenson. At the end he states he is neither the original nor Piranesi but a third secret thing because of his experiences in The House and his memories from reality and he does sound a little bit like the Piranesi who is masking his understanding of life in the House and I cannot imagine the post sim hajizuru slurry that is poured out into the real world would behave any differently...

Izuru takes the name Hajime to honor the one who he used to be and because everyone around Izuru knows him as Hajime but he masks that burden of talent that Izuru has been plagued with since their birth and I think it's kinda really encapsulated in dr3's hope arc. He shows up to save Makoto and the remaining survivors and is completely calm and serene about it really. its so alien and different from the freaked out Hajime from the simulation. To me it's always felt like Hajime post sim is just the Izuru who took up the belief to look towards the future and not dwell in the past because that is how you heal and Hajime never learned that but Izuru did.

[sweepweep]

No one can convince me that they didn’t “train” Hajime and Izuru like a dog during the lobotomy process.

Like a full eraser and rewire of someone’s mind and body doesn’t happen in one surgery, so during the process, they (for Hajime) would’ve conditioned him to expect surgery at certain times, expect tests at certain times, they probably took away any contact he had with the world and referred to him as Izuru Kamukura to try and speed up the process.

When it comes to Izuru after the final lobotomy, they would’ve had to “train” him even more. I mean, they now have a newborn with the abilities and strength of a god, who they’ve neglected to teach empathy or morals. If they wanted to do a test, and he said no, there was nothing they’d be able to do.

And of course they needed a way to keep track of their super-tool

That’s why my hyperfixated brain has decided that post-game Hajime/Izuru has one arm with a tattooed barcode, which if scanned, will show the entire process, including pre and post, and test results.

And that his other arm is scarred beyond belief with a mess of lichtenberg figures from his wrist to elbow from electrical shock. The scientists and doctors wouldn’t have been able to get remotely close to him if he didn’t want them to. So how better to control him than with a long-distance shock at the press of a button.

They weren’t going to bother teaching him how to feel things like regret, empathy, or morals, because a super weapon would be weakened by those. So they had to have control before he figured out everything and went off on his own and did whatever he wanted.

TLDR: The Hope Cultivation Plan was probably a lot more fucked up than we bother to think about. I could go on and on about this if asked (or not) to

(I do currently have a fic in process about this, of which I will shamelessly link when it’s done)

[hajihiko]

I find it funny anon said that cuz now all I’m thinking is

*EPIC RAP BATTLES OF HISTORY*

ADULT MUNDANE LIFE VS LOBOTOMY!!!

(All jokes and lighthearted)

ok well it depends are we talking post or pre Experiment Hajime. BC I can't compete with post lobotomy obvi but the rest mþdjdjdh

[avpdfreak]

can people stop acting like hajimes trauma isn't a big deal . because that's just not true .

IN THIS POST I WILL BE USING SHE / HER FOR HAJIME . it is my hc

no not all of hajimes problems are due to "wanting to impress chiaki" it's a LOT more then that , hajime has shown interest for hopes peak sense he was a kid . so she's always dreamed of having a talent of some sorts , almost like how kids dream of being astronauts or doctors , things that are hard to achieve and not possible for most .

it seems to me that hajime is a gifted kid burn out , in the beginning of the games , hajime makes comments on how it's a lot more peaceful , then her regular life , not having to always be working .

i think this shows how hajimes desire of talent would cause her to overwork herself , it's very possible that hajime is one of these people who would do ANYTHING to achieve their goal . this is supported by the fact hajime got a whole lobotomy just to able to have a talent , to feel special .

a big misconception regarding the lobotomy thing is that she only did it go impress chiaki , which is most likely not true , yes that did play a part into it , but most likely the biggest factor was desire to have talent , to fit out , to feel special . when hajime finds out she's a reserve course student , it's very heavily implied that she feels as if , without talent , she means nothing , she's different from the others on the island . different because there's nothing interesting about her , nothing she's good at , etc .

also on the lobotomy thing , it seems hajime has neglectful parents , seeing from the fact that her parents canonically agreed to the kamukura project .. meaning they allowed their child to get a lobotomy ,, no parent would do that .

to lazy to add more rn ,,

[dangakkisland]

Veiled Hope (Beta: H.O.P.E) Concept art below

‹long post be warned (If you don't feel well to touch on subjects like death, corpses even if with not much detail I recomend watching after yourself and maybe pass this post for another time!)

For starters Veiled Hope was supposed to be called "H.O.P.E" or "E.S.P.E.R.A.N.��.A" As in the portuguese script I wrote for it, the "Veiled" part came from another work called "Veiled Shadows" which fused with H.O.P.E; One more reason for the name was because it was fully focused on Izuru after the Hope cultivation program jumping the entire part of the DESPAIR arc

Izuru's uniform is the same as Hajime's right now the only difference was the symbols being green spades rather than light-red diamonds (Notes from the images above: Always keep the card theme between Nagito, Hajime, and Chiaki, possibly could work with Makoto/Mitarai in the end but not when they don't know both his identity yet)‹ this is not followed anymore

[He was still Ryota Mitarai/Ryota Nanami instead of Mitarai Nanami, the change was because it just sounded way better and it flowed like a feather.]

Yasuke alive and well even after Junko took his life for unknown reasons I put as "Later but related to Hope's peak academy and the Future Foundation"⟩ if I followed I would probably blame the Ultimate Pharmacist and her magic medicine or the same thing that Kyoko used to jump back from the dead.

He also has lobotomy marks, I put his state as "Depression, Delusion, Dependent all with extra steps"

His design would be only Yasuke in a Black and white suit probably something relating to Monokuma as a callout for Junko somewhat in the design, the only note in specific is make the sole of his shoes reflect the weird red eye on Monokuma/ half of the Hope's peak symbol under the sole of his shoes.

Mahiru! Her redesign as the Ultimate despair, all smiles. All the Ultimate despairs received redesigns but the starter ones were way more brutal like Mahiru's (She used to have way more teeth than she is supposed to, that was to reflect the smile dillema and fuse it with despair) and Servant's (After Another Episode he had to amputate one of his legs due an infection and the injury was way more gorey than it should {Removed})

There was one flashback scene of Izuru dancing with a students half alive half dead corpse {Removed}

Izuru's cave like hideout painted pink {Removed}

Izuru disguised as Junko for Makoto {Removed in this certain situation}

Kyoko and Izuru serious talk in private, Izuru disguised as Hajime {Removed but depends on certain situations}

Kyoko animated failed execution {Removed}

Ultimate despairs break Makoto's security system in the most silly way possible (Metal pipe) {Maybe just because its funny}

Shirokuma was supposed to be a big role, I didn't elaborate much myself only letting a note about how it wandered in vents EVERYWHERE in red marker

Makoto sick with despair after seeing the first chapter of Super Dangaronpa 2, He couldn't get a hold of reality as the security system was locked (Flooded by the Junko AI). Byakuya taking his duty of watching the Killing game instead when Kyoko tried to figure out how the Virus got there filling everyone involved in their Seniors with serious distrust.

I was thinking on making this longer bit actually this is everything giving no spoilers for the story at all, mostly just removed content and some character designs with unused descriptions. I'll probably do it again when I finish completely, I can't tell how long it will take probably years 1-2 however it could be probably so worth it and I'll fight as long as I can

[dullahandyke]

Hang on actually before I hit post limit.pinned post so I can edit this and have my tumblr thoughts even tho I'm post limited

-

6.40PM

Yup okay hit the post limit <3 new followers please know this is normal

-

6.47PM

Anonymous asked: did they put bugs in him again

Yknow it's hard to tell but I think they might have. Guys we need to get riku dewormed again, this keeps happening to him :(

Anonymous asked: I forgot I had notifs turned on for your blog . Oopsie daisy

HAHAAAAAAAA ANON I CACKLED.... flattered u have urgent coverage on which large surface I'm thinking abt being slammed into at any given time but ig this is an object lesson in paying too much attention to me or something

-

8.06PM

Listening to a queer history podcast and it's so funny they're explaining to me what yuri is... I know ❤

-

8.14PM

on my laptop now bcos i gotta study for this stupid test..d. and then afterwards theres a powerpoint im actually rlly gonna enjoy presenting but i gotta facking put it together, augh

-

8.51PM

niche complaint but it sucks shit when animanga do the 'character suddenly becomes hot as part of a daydream/joke' gag and they dont go full bishie. give that man a delicate jawline NOW!!!

-

9.13PM

really happy with this sticker on my laptop. whenever im feeling down i just rememebr that this man got a lobotomy

[ID: a black frame meme featuring Hajime Hinata from Super Danganronpa 2 at the chapter 1 cabin party, smiling and holding a glass of orange juice. It is captioned, "This man, got a lobotomy.]

-

9.18PM

whew im a sneezy girl. the sneezing sneasler. wait thats a pokemon. ritalin on friday unless i have a heart murmur

-

9.37PM

@effervescentleaf asked:

-

9.39PM

i know im constantly posting abt my beard but its still weird as hell to consider that i have a beard that other people can see. when people look at me they see androgyny. what the fuck. i keep being drawn to people with beards and make-up/long hair/jewelry/whatever the fuck else as my favourite examples of gender non-conformity and like. IM that. im that with my stupid eyeliner. what the shit

also that reminds me im not gonna have time to do my eyeliner before my class test tomorrow :/ now i Could just go without it bcos i'll have a presentation later in the day that i should probably be serious for. but where is the fun in that. i will be wearing a hawaiian shirt instead of a t-shirt and thats all that can be expected of me <3

-

9.55PM

i probs need to eat a proper meal but the call of pop tarts it is so great.... sighhhh i got the bread out the freezer for soup so ill see if thats defrosted. and if not. squints. cup noodles. kinda want the cup noodles anyway but the soup is gonna expire soon so i gotta be fuckinnn responsible and nutritious or whatever

sidenote i kind of rlly enjoy having just one long ledger of posts all day. kind of fun

-

11.51PM

Ugh fuck my gay life I gotta make a PowerPoint... I'm tired I'm a bit sick i gotta sleeeep... wanted to make it fancy but ig that's fucked :(

-

12.01AM

I saw a video of a cat and now I miss bubbles :( bubblesssss... I'm going home tomorrow tho so I'll see her then :)

[alstroemerian-dragon]

izuru is so interesting to me conceptually. like i know in canon he’s kind of nothing unfortunately. at least in game canon, he shows up right at the end, says some eugenics-y shit, voices hajimes intrusive thoughts, and then hes gone, but. the concept of him, as hajime, but with everything that made him Hajime Hinata stripped away and buried under so much conditioning and bullshit that he cant reach it, is so. its SO. yknow.

its the whole argument about what makes us the people we are, right? if you take a person, and then erase literally all the memories they have of their own identity, are they still that person? have you taken away everything that makes them Them and made them a completely different one? how does that change, and pardon the philosophical question, their soul?

and the thing about izuru is that you can not tell me the memory repression was perfect. you can not tell me that hopes peak academy perfected the art of lobotomy so well that they completely erased every speck of hajime hinata that existed inside izuru kamukura. that boy felt what was missing he knew there was a hole the size of the fucking ocean in his head and he felt every centimeter of it. did he care? up for debate. izuru didnt seem to care about anything, really (which… i have some thoughts about his eugenics conditioning by the academy in regards to that but thats maybe another post). but i definitely think given enough time, some of that would have started to come back. maybe even after the events of the first game, when the school was open again, and junko was dead, and izuru was able to actually explore the place he was held and experimented in and look at the files, and discover his old name. something like that would definitely trigger some memory recovery, or at least a moderate breakdown of some kind.

i dont know. people have said before that izuru is kind of an interesting metaphor for depression if you think about it, and theyre right, he is. he doesnt care enough about anything in life, he doesnt care about hygiene, nothing is going to catch and hold his attention because he thinks he knows how everything in the world works so whats the point in even trying? but he isnt just a metaphor. thats who hajime was during that time. now im definitely one of the people who thinks hajime was a pretty depressed kid anyway, unable to fulfill what he thought he needed to be, constantly pressured to be something he wasnt and couldnt be. but izuru was so much worse. they gave that boy fucking. ultimate depression. super high school level depression. i definitely think the only reason izuru didnt ever do anything drastic about how utterly miserable he was is because. a lot of it was background noise to him? his brain was just blocked off so those triggers were unable to fire? and because. to be honest. thats truly so much work. especially with the reflexes and instincts and empowerment the experiments gave him. and junko’s despair was just intriguing enough to keep him moving

its just something i think about. if someone had been willing or able to just. talk to izuru and offer him a hand. understand that he was hurting and that he didnt have to be. that just because there were holes in his identity didnt mean he couldnt create his own pieces to fit into them. i truly think that if he’d had that kind of presence during the tragedy his brain would have unlocked itself. maybe not all the memories would come back, but he’d be able to feel stuff again at least. and thats… something.

[komeeder]

bizarre like. danganronpa headcanons that i have that i literally believe so much it might as well be canon to me.

i dont even ship them or anything but i believe with all of my heart that if makoto just gave byakuya a little kiss it would have fixed everything wrong with byakuya.

kokichi is agender jester gender . no gender just chaos. guy is too silly to follow gender rules

i think that komaeda never really cared to think about gender since his life is just So Much and he doesnt socialize with other people enough to really be able to even think about his place gender-wise among other people, but post-game if he heals and is able to become more social and comfortable with everyone else, other trans or genderqueer friends of his could introduce him to the idea and he would probably be trans or genderqueer of some flavor

actually realizing i have a lot of gender thoughts about these characters. not my fault that they look so transgender and gay.

chihiro is a complicated topic but the plot in the game is still transmisogynistic regardless of the writer's intentions, and while i dont really have a strong opinion on what chihiros gender is i personally view them as trans feminine, binary or not.

the concept of byakuyas drag persona of polaris p polanski is so interesting to me. he definitely has some kind of bizarre internalized stuff going on LAWL

gundham is too powerful for the lowly human concept of gender.

imposter is of course genderfluid for the. you know. imposter thing kinda but i think that if they were left to just be themself they wouldnt have a particularly strong or a more fluctuating sense of gender

gender is boring to izuru of course. agender in the sense that gender is a somewhat. emotional and social feeling and after the "lobotomy" he is probably unable to feel any kind of connection to such a social and emotional concept. when hajime emerges from the game and regains some of his original self, this aspect of izuru probably lingers and probably leaves hajime with a gender crisis. among you know. all of the other identity crises.

the second i saw rantaro he was so enby to me. im not sure why but he just radiates enby energy. not nonbinary i mean enby. this distinction matters to me for some unknowable reason. unknowable even to me.

[eggs-can-draw]

you: Hajime and Izuru post sdr2 brainstate Mainly my thoughts on it but also applied to the au

Ok so like they’re two people two separate identities but also they’re not. They’re like hot metal kinda. Never specifically one at a time and never not a weird mesh of both it’s not a clean merge. Sometimes he’s more Izuru and sometimes he’s more Hajime but they’re both still Him. And like (esp at first or just. If you knew either of them before the nwp) you can kinda tell what’s a Hajime reaction or idea, and what’s an Izuru one but they’re both still semi responsible for the idea and feeling, y'know? Lots of memories from the tragedy and Before the lobotomy were lost in the weird melting pot of a brain merge but over time he manages to get a lot of it back (NEVER LEARNS WHO KOKICHI MOM WAS THO THAT GOT COMPLETELY LOST IN THE BRAIN MERGE) Neither of them have like. Independent thought? Like they’re both having the same thoughts if that makes sense but also little bits and pieces are very much One of them and not Both of that makes sense

The macro is both tho. Also they don’t share feelings usually Thanks for coming to my Ted talk

firedemongaming: Izuru just intentionally blocked access to the knowledge of Kokichi's mum right before the merge just to piss off Hajime. He knows he'll never have full control again so he's a little spiteful. Also MoM asked that no one else learn of her identity as Kokichi's mum. And, while he knows they're technically the same person, to Izuru, Hajime is still someone else

you: Enough of someone else to keep the knowledge away from him lmao It was part of the trade deal. She wants to remain a free horse

Haha post sdr2 Hajimmy/Izuwu thoughts let’s gooooooo

[isdisorigionalenoughforyou]

[infizero-draws]

uggjdhgsjjggh komahina,,,,,

[hajihiko]

Hi, I loved your last art! Ultimate Imposter is an underrated fave of mine and I love the enby headcanon for him. I'm also curious about your thoughts on Hajime's gender identity. I see post-canon Hinata as inherently gender-fucked, at least a little, because I can't imagine going through everything he did wrt human experimentation and not coming out the other side with the realization that gender is fake. I know you don't like labels and I'm not asking for that, I'd just like to hear your take on the topic 🤔☺️ And sorry if you've talked about this before

My thoughts are basically like .... "you cant understand my gender or lack thereof if you dont have the insane amount of information and same experiences that I do. Not 100% sure I understand it myself on account of the ... yknow the forced brain altering and emotional amnesia. However retaining my identity post-lobotomy was kind of a big deal so I'll just default to that both to make it easier and because it feels better than nothing at all. Mostly don't care though"