#guilt from both so strong that it keeps them from talking even longer

[mariatesstruther]

listening to hayley williams “why we ever - acoustic” and thinking about joel and tommy’s separation because apparently i enjoy making myself cry. but seriously:

OUCH. OUCH OUCH OUCH FUCKING OUCH

[asumi2020202]

The Right Choice

Pairing: Aemond Targaryen x reader(slight), Daeron Targaryen x reader

Summary: After everything that has happened, you thought he would change. Only for him to inflict a bigger scar as your hope for this marriage vanishes into thin air.

A/n:Thank you for reading.

Alternate ending of: Everything has a Price to Pay

_______________________________ฅ⁠^⁠•⁠ﻌ⁠•⁠^⁠ฅ__

War was at its peak. It had been almost two weeks since the last time you met Aemond in your shared chambers. Your wounds had healed leaving behind just some aches.

You knew that he didn't speak the truth. The informer of the green, Larys Strong had informed them that Aemond had returned to Harrehal. And that his whore was pregnant with his bastard.

You knew he would do so. You knew he would not be able to keep his word. Because if he truly was faithfully, then he wouldn't had slept with her in the first place.

You didn't really feel anything. You were disappointed,Yes, but you wouldn't hold him back if he did love her. You had your son and your family.

Instead of being dissatisfied with his actions and crying over it, you thought of asking your eldest brother to annul the marriage.

Aemond had broken the gentle girl you once were. The pain and betrayal numbed your mind. No longer did you care of what the others would say.

_________________________________________

Word had been sent to the Red Keep from Harrehal that Prince Aemond would bring back his whore to the Keep.

Your numbed soul hurt. Alicent didn't even want to call him her son but she couldn't deny it.

He had stated that a room should be prepared for... Alys. The name of his whore.

You simply couldn't stand the thought of being with him again. Not when that perpetrator would also stay with his whore inside your very home.

You asked the maids to shift your belongings and your son's to another room. Your mother, the dowager queen had told you to stay with Helaena since Aegon doesn't sleep with her.

She thought that since both of you had the same fate, you could find comfort in each other.

You had agreed. Hastily leaving the room along with your son to find your eldest brother, the king.

_________________________________________

Aemond had landed near the dragon pit. He got off of Vhagar before carefully taking Alys off of Vhagar as well.

Alys had tried to touch Vhagar. Trying to pet her like Aemond does but Vhagar gave a loud and angry growl. And almost tried to bite her before Aemond intervened.

Alys fearful of the dragon, hid behind Aemond.

He turned and saw Moonfyre giving a very angry and loud scream towards them before both the female dragons flew off in the sky.

Aemond, turning his gaze back to Alys, guided her inside.

_________________________________________

As he walked through the garden and inside the corridors, he could see you talking to someone. It was a man. He too had white hair like him and was tall like him.

Aemond asked a passing maid to escort Alys to her room before he saw you coming towards his direction. The man going the opposite direction.

As you tried your hard to walk past Aemond and avoid him, he grabbed your hand.

"Y/n.." he started.

You turned to look at him. He felt a pang of hurt in his chest. Your eyes looked hollow unlike the way it shined when you conversed with the other man.

" It was just one night . I didn't think she would get pregnant. I couldn't leave her there, knowing our enemies might attack any time. I really am guilted. I didn't wish to hurt you love. Please forgive me." He spoke, looking at your face as you looked outside.

"I'm sorry I couldn't satisfy you. That you sought out another woman for pleasure." You said. He was about to speak but you didn't give him the chance.

"From now on you can live with her. I hold no grudge. After all, it is my fault for not being able to hold my husband to myself.

But don't worry you can love her as much you wish from now. You and I will only be related through blood and name, nothing else. I already found someone who will love me."

"My love. I don't understand what you mean. Found another? We are married. I am your husband and you are my wife." He spoke up, hoping you didn't mean what he thought you mean. Anger and jealousy in his voice.

"No longer. I had asked Aegon to annul our marriage after you're raven arrived. And he did so. The whole of kings landing knows of what you did brother. The council has decided that me and my twin will marry each other so I can be relieved of the shame you bestowed upon me. Daeron and I did loved each other before he was sent to old town.

Now that I am no longer bound to you, I am free to marry him and my son does need a father. Aegon assured me that my son will be acknowledged by the people as mine and Daeron's son, as the people haven't seen Aenor yet. You would be wise to not disturb us." You spoke with venom as you walked away.

Annul the marriage? Your twin? When did Daeron return from old town? Aenor will be claimed as Daeron's son. His younger brother.

So many thoughts went around Aemond's head. He had messed up everything just for pleasure. He lost the only who loved him for who he was and now she left him along with his son.

Defeated, he asked a maid to escort him to where Alys was.

_________________________________________

All the family had gathered in the dining hall. Aemond came in and saw everyone already chatting and conversing. His eyes looked for you until they did find you.

In your right sat Helaena, conversing with you. And on your left, in his seat, sat Daeron.. he saw how the two of you held hands and occasionally smiled at each other.

His thoughts were disturbed as he felt a tugging on his arm. It was Alys.

The entire family's laughter and peace was stopped due to the unwanted face in the dining hall.

"Brother. I thought that this hall was only for family, you had been the one to tell me that. And yet you bring some whore here. Aren't you acting hypocritical?" Aegon said. Giving a disgusted look towards Alys.

Aegon noticed your discomfort with Alys present. He knew he treated his wife the same but Helaena was weird to him. Yet you... were his perfect little sister.

Aegon had completely changed after becoming the king. He couldn't quit drinking but he didn't go to brothels.

"Alys will be eating with us from now on. And I suggest you show her some respect." Aemond replied as Alys looked down.

"Suggest? Hah!" Aegon laughed. "Are you trying to intimidate me brother? I am the king. Your whore is of little worth to me." Aegon continued.

"Aegon." Alicent tried to stop her son. She got up from her seat and came around the table at your side and gently placed her hand on your arm.

"I could behead you and whore at once for the shame you brought to the house and my sister." Aegon said as Aemond had nothing to reply with. He only looked at your face as you turned away.

"Guards. Escort prince Aemond and that.... Witch! to their chambers." Aegon ordered as the said people were escorted away.

You looked at Daeron as he offered you a smile which you reciprocated and intertwined your hands together.

_________________________________________

"How could you?! You ruined everything that I had! Just to cover up one lie of yours! You decieved me!!"

"I'm sorry Aemond but I needed money to raise my child! I had to do it. I am sorry if I hurt you.. but I do accept that I never loved you to begin with."

Hurt?! You took everything from me! My child! My wife! My family!.. And now you tell me that... The child is not even mine?!!

Shouting could be heard throughout the castle.

Alys had been secretly seeing and writing to her lover. Not Aemond. Aemond had accidentally seen them kissing when he entered the room.

She confessed that she was pregnant before they even laid with each other. That the child was of her lover's.

Aemond in a fit of rage even slapped her when she told him that she only stayed with him for money to run away with her lover.

Aemond felt betrayed. Just as he felt when his father didn't take his side when he lost his eye. He felt blocked from all sides. Because of his mistake, no one in his family believes him anymore.

He ran out the door as fast as he could. He hastily reached the dragon pit and mounted Vhagar.

He took off to the place where Aegon had been coronated. As got off and pushed through the crowd. Tears flowed from his eye.

There you stood before the crowd. You and Daeron. As the High Septon finished his speech. You lips and palms were already cut. By the time he reached, you two were drinking from the cup.

He saw the way you both kissed eachother so lovingly, the same way he did when you both got married. But now he had to see his brother do that to you.

His mother, the dowager Queen. His brother, the king. His grandsire, the Hand. His sister, the Queen. All stood there and smiled. The crowd were cheering. Yet Aemond felt bitter.

_________________________________________

The Dowager Queen and The Hand had left for the Red Keep along with the King and the Queen.

Daeron was mounting Tessarion and you Moonfyre. Aemond ran to meet you. As he did, you looked down at him.

"It isn't mine. That child isn't mine." Aemond spoke. He was panting, having to run all the way to you.

"Oh that.. I already knew. Helaena told me 2 days after I last met you." You spoke calmly.

"Already knew?" He felt confused.

"Well if my mind serves properly, Helaena told me through her riddle 'The one who he sacrificed for is not his own.' "

Aemond didn't even know what to say, so you spoke for him.

"Brother..... I know it was a mistake you made. I won't blame you for seeking love hence I forgive you for what you did but I don't know if mother will. I am thankful to you." You spoke.

"Why would you thank me for what I did?" Aemond didn't understand what you said.

"I am thankful because for your mistake I was reunited with my twin, my husband. I blindly thought I loved you but it seems that I was wrong. I can only give you one advice... Move on." You said the last sentence coldly, not sparing him even a glance. And with that Moonfyre and Tessarion flew into the sky, roaring from above.

Aemond stood there, his one eye saw your pain and anguish. His tears fell endlessly as he stared into the sky.

_________________________________________

You stood near the corridor of the second floor, staring at the training yard. While your husband, Daeron, cradled your son to his chest.

You turned to your husband as he gently kissed you with one hand cupping your cheek and tilting your head up.

"I am to go get a dragon egg for my little princess." Daeron said as his eyes travel to your stomach.

"Princess? How do you know it'll be a girl? I am betting a barrel of wine that it'll be a boy. Mother's intuition." You replied to your husband, smirking at him.

"Let's see who will win. The father or the mother." Daeron spoke, giving you his kinky smile. You got on your toes to kiss his cheek as you both were leaving for your chambers.

Beknownst to you, Aemond had seen everything you two were doing. He felt hurt. Hurt because he couldn't experience it. Hurt because he saw how happy you were with his brother. He regretted everything he had done that day. The day he laid with the whore.

He saw you both leaving. While he was blinking away his tears, he saw you angle your head a little towards him. He saw you smile and rotate you head back to the front.

He heard you say a sentence before you left with you husband and child. One that completely broke him.

..."I finally made The Right Choice".......

-Lillian

[diariesofthelover]

A New Regular

synopsis: After his favorite bookstore in Gotham went out of business, Jason had to find a new one that he’d actually like. He decided to check out one a couple blocks down from his apartment in hopes that it’ll be a decent replacement, when he goes in he finds something worth coming back for.

notes: Jason Todd x reader, 3rd person pov, reader works at a bookstore.

Of course Jason’s favorite bookstore went out of business. It was a small store tucked away in one of Gotham’s less populated neighborhoods meaning that they never got enough sales and it didn’t help that their star customer was “dead” for a couple years.

Now he had to go searching for a replacement, god he had a strong dislike for that word, something that’ll at least be adequate enough since he knew that nothing could ever replace his original bookshop. Not with all the memories, the owners who knew him so well, the atmosphere, and that certain smell that brought him back to the last time where he actually felt happy. The place meant more to him than just a bookstore, it was a piece of his childhood that wasn’t tainted by anything, and now it’s gone.

His search began with another small shop that was only a few blocks down from his apartment, convenient. He wasn’t excited about this, no, he didn’t want to be doing this in the first place. His place should’ve never closed, it should still be there running and waiting for him, but it wasn’t which upset him more than he thought it would.

With a slight scowl on his face he made the walk to the unfamiliar bookstore by his apartment. Jason’s hood was up as usual, trying to keep his face away from people on the street for numerous reasons.

After a few minutes he made it to the possible replacement. It was nuzzled in between a cafe and a record store, fitting. It was small, smaller than the rest of the businesses on the block. With uncertainty Jason walked in, a doorbell sounded signaling his entrance. There were only a few other customers in the store, quietly picking out books to escape to, and no workers in sight.

“At least I won’t be bothered,” he thought to himself.

He headed straight for the classics, hoping to stumble upon a work he hasn’t read yet, practically impossible. As he searched through the novels he heard footsteps coming to this section, being who he was Jason was able to pick up on them several seconds before they got to where he was. When the steps came to a stop Jason looked up from the books to see who was near him now, was it curiosity, paranoia, or both?

What he faced was someone who was either an employee or an extreme book enthusiast as she was holding a stack of books that went so far up that her face was hidden behind the literature.

His first thought was to help, that’s the kind of guy he was or at least used to be, but he didn’t do anything as he looked away and went back looking for books to read. He wasn’t interested in meeting new people and talking to strangers anymore, even if they shared the same love for reading as he did. In fact, the idea alone made his stomach churn which is why he minded his business and kept to himself. People were probably better off without him in their lives anyway.

All of a sudden there was a crash as each book fell to the floor, the noise startling him a little.

“Shit,” he heard the girl swear under her breath as she squatted down to pick up the books.

Jason glanced over to her, she had a name tag signaling that she worked there as well as a defeated expression on her face. The longer he stood there not helping, the faster the guilt began to seep in.

God fucking damn it, fine.

Before he could even register what he was doing, Jason squatted down across from her helping her retrieve the dropped books.

“Oh thank you, you really didn’t have to,” she said shyly.

Jason didn’t respond, instead he gave her a slight nod as his way of saying, “no worries”. He was trying his best to avoid any eye contact and keep his eyes locked on the books but he couldn’t help but take a look at her face.

She was beautiful, fuck, so beautiful actually she may as well of come out of one of the novels she dropped. He quickly looked back down again hoping a blush hadn’t formed on his face, he knew that if he spoke now he’d stutter and make a fool out of himself.

She couldn’t help but steal a couple of glances of him as well. Her gaze went from book to him then back to the books then to his perfect face again. Some may have found him to look incredibly intimidating, most actually, and she did but she also thought him to be incredibly handsome. Maybe she’d been reading too much but he looked like he’d be a character from any of those classic romance novels that she loved.

Jason rose as he gathered the remaining novels. She looked up at him from where she was kneeling below him and to her he looked like god. Forget Austen’s novels, he was from a greek myth. His shoulders muscular and broad even under his red hoodie and brown leather jacket, his thighs thick with muscles hidden under the denim, and his height…well he was certainly tall, much taller than she. She had to be mindful of her facial expressions as she gawked at him for far too long.

He tried to make himself look smaller, tried to relax his muscles and hunch over. He didn’t want to intimidate her or scare her off. After being resurrected, his body began to change rapidly. Yes puberty kicked in but the lazarus pit was like an intense steroid resulting in him being huge, an absolute unit.

Sure, he liked how he looked when he was suited up as Red Hood but when he was without his mask and armor, he left like a brute. His size made him feel like some sort of monster. He didn’t want to scare good people away, especially women, but he knew he appeared incredibly intimidating to them all regardless of what he wanted.

And the scars, god that was the worst part for him. His body is scattered with them from all the fighting he’s done and violence he’s endured, his face not left unmarked either. As a kid, he thought they were cool, that it meant that you were strong and a survivor, now it makes him feel weak and reminds him of what has happened to him and what he became as a result. Each scar held a story, not the kinds he wants to be reading about.

All of these thoughts were swirling in Jason’s head as the bookstore worker looked up at him in what he thought was horror and disgust.

To his surprise she stood up with half of the novels in her hands with a sweet smile on her face.

“Thank you again, that was very kind of you,” she softly said still with a smile on her perfect face.

Jason hadn’t been called kind in awhile, it caught him off guard for a moment as a small smile broke out on his face.

“No problem,” was all he chose to say as he handed her the rest of the books.

“Do you need help finding anything? I practically know where everything is, especially in this section,” she let out a small laugh.

“I,” he cleared his throat, “I’m just browsing, thank you,” his deep voice contradicted his shy tone as he turned his back to her before she could see the blush that threatened to paint his structured face.

“Okay, well just let me know you if need anything, I’ll be around,” she said a little awkwardly.

Disappointed, she went over to the shelf behind Jason to do her job.

The two couldn’t help but look over their shoulders to sneak glances at one another, never catching each other in the process.

She only had one more book left to put away, Frankenstein. Of course, it was on the same shelf that Jason was currently browsing through.

“Excuse me, sorry,” she came up behind him to slip the last novel on the shelf. Jason stepped to the side giving her space, his eyes caught on the book in her hand.

She noticed his possible interest and stopped herself from returning it to its place.

“Oh, did you want to see this one?” She had a hopeful expression on her face as she reached the book out for him to take.

Jason read Frankenstein when he was younger but he hadn’t gone back to it since his death, he feared that it would hit too close to home. He didn’t want to relate to the monster, especially as much as he did, he wanted things to be different. He’d oftentimes fantasize about a life where he didn’t get killed or at least a world where Batman avenged him, these fantasies only screwed with his head more. Maybe it was time for him to really look at reality through a fictional lens, maybe it could help him figure some shit out.

Jason accepted her offer, his calloused fingers brushing against hers when he grabbed the book.

“Thank you,” he mumbled as he examined the new cover.

“I really enjoyed that one, it’s actually one of my favorites,” she beamed but got no response from Jason. She quickly grew embarrassed as she felt that he was bothered by her talking and overall presence. In reality, he wanted to hear more. After a couple of seconds of awkward silence, she turned away ready to leave him alone.

“Why’s that?” He suddenly asked causing her to turn back around again, his focus still on the book in his large hands.

Caught off guard she took awhile to respond, “The story, the character, well everything about it really I could go on and on.”

Jason finally looked at her, his cheeks heated but he didn’t care he wanted to talk to her.

“I’m listening.”

The pair went on to discuss the book that they both had a love for. Luckily, the store remained relatively dead and no one intruded on their conversation. Jason was mesmerized by the way she spoke and the way she thought. She was charmed by how good of a listener he was and his own takes.

For the next couple hours they had jumped from book to book, connecting pieces of their personal lives to literature, it was their way of getting to know each other.

He felt silly for ever worrying about finding a place that at least was decent. He ended up finding a treasure, one worth coming back for again and again.



[reidmarieprentiss]

Second Chances and Serendipity

Summary: Y/N is Will's sister, she meets Spencer when Henry is born, but she is already seeing someone else.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!reader

Warnings: bisexual Y/N

Category: fluff

Word count: 4.1k

main masterlist

The antiseptic smell of the hospital filled the air as Y/N made her way through the maze of corridors to the maternity ward. Her excitement bubbled over; her brother Will and his girlfriend JJ were about to welcome their first child into the world. The anticipation was electric, and she could hardly contain her enthusiasm.

As she approached the reception desk, Y/N's eyes scanned the area for any familiar faces. Not seeing anyone she recognized, she stepped up to the desk and smiled at the receptionist.

"Hi, I’m here for Will LaMontagne and Jennifer Jareau. My name is Y/N," she said, her voice a mix of excitement and nerves. "Do you know where I can find them?"

Before the receptionist could respond, a tall, lanky man with tousled brown hair and glasses stepped forward. He had been sitting in the waiting area, absorbed in a thick book, but Y/N's question had caught his attention.

"Excuse me," he said softly, his voice carrying a hint of curiosity. "Did you say you're here for Will and JJ?"

Y/N turned to face him, her eyes widening slightly. "Yes, I'm Will's sister, Y/N."

The young man smiled, "I’m Spencer Reid, one of JJ's colleagues and friends. Nice to meet you."

Y/N smiled back, feeling a warmth in his presence. "Nice to meet you too, Spencer. This is such an exciting day."

"It really is," Spencer agreed, his smile growing. "Would you like to sit with me while we wait? I can fill you in on what's been happening."

"That sounds great," Y/N replied, grateful for the company.

They walked over to the waiting area and took seats next to each other. Spencer closed his book, giving Y/N his full attention.

"So, how's everything going so far?" Y/N asked, settling into her chair.

"JJ and Will are doing well. JJ went into labor a few hours ago, so it shouldn’t be too much longer now," Spencer explained.

"That's good to hear," Y/N said, a sigh of relief escaping her. "I can’t wait to meet my nephew."

Spencer smiled warmly. "He’s going to have a lot of love in his life, that’s for sure."

As they waited, the conversation between them flowed effortlessly. Y/N was fascinated by Spencer’s work with the BAU and his impressive intellect. They talked about everything from books and movies to their favorite childhood memories.

"You know," Spencer said, leaning in slightly, "it's not often I meet someone who can keep up with my random facts."

Y/N laughed, her eyes twinkling. "Well, you haven’t heard all of mine yet. Did you know that octopuses have three hearts?"

"Really?" Spencer's eyebrows shot up. "That’s fascinating! One heart pumps blood through its organs, and the other two pump it through the gills."

"Exactly!" Y/N beamed, enjoying their playful exchange.

Time seemed to stand still as they delved deeper into their conversation, sharing stories and jokes as if they had known each other for years. The connection between them was undeniable, a magnetic pull that neither could resist.

Eventually, the door to the waiting room opened, and a nurse stepped in, her smile broad. "Will and JJ would like to introduce you to baby Henry."

Spencer and Y/N stood up, both feeling a little reluctant to end their conversation but equally eager to meet the newest addition to the family.

They entered the room, where Will and JJ were beaming with pride, baby Henry cradled in JJ’s arms. But even amidst the joy and celebration, Y/N couldn’t help but feel a pang of guilt for what she felt today with Spencer. The connection had been so strong, so immediate, that it felt almost surreal.

Will looked up, his face lighting up even more when he saw his sister. "Hey, Y/N! Did you and Spencer get a chance to meet?"

"Yes, we did," Y/N replied with a smile, glancing at Spencer who gave a small nod in agreement.

"Great," Will said, looking around. "So, where's Stephanie? I thought she was coming with you."

At the mention of her girlfriend, Y/N felt a slight tightening in her chest. She adored Stephanie, but today's encounter with Spencer had stirred unexpected feelings. "She couldn't make it," Y/N said, trying to keep her tone light. "She had to work late, but she sends her love and promises to visit soon."

Spencer's expression shifted almost imperceptibly, his smile faltering just a bit. He looked away, focusing on baby Henry, but Y/N noticed the change. The realization that she was already taken seemed to hit him harder than it should after one meeting.

"That's too bad," Will said, but he was quickly distracted by Henry's small movements. "Come on over, meet your nephew."

Y/N moved closer to the bed, her heart melting as she looked at the tiny baby in JJ's arms. "Oh, he's perfect," she whispered, gently touching Henry's hand.

JJ smiled up at her. "He’s stolen my heart already."

Spencer stood by the foot of the bed, his hands in his pockets. "He’s very lucky," he said softly.

Y/N glanced over at Spencer, feeling a mix of emotions. She couldn't deny the spark between them, but she also couldn't ignore her commitment to Stephanie. It was a confusing tangle of feelings that left her unsure of what to do next.

As the family cooed over Henry, Y/N found herself standing next to Spencer again. He seemed quieter now, more reserved, and she couldn't help but feel a pang of regret.

"I'm really glad we met today, Spencer," she said softly, hoping to bridge the sudden gap between them.

"Me too," he replied, his voice gentle but distant. "Congratulations on becoming an aunt. Henry's very lucky to have you in his life."

"Thank you," Y/N said, wishing she could find the right words to explain the confusion in her heart. But with Will and JJ so happy and Spencer standing just out of reach, it didn't seem like the right time.

They stayed in the room a while longer, sharing the joy of Henry's arrival. But the undercurrent of unresolved feelings between Y/N and Spencer lingered, a quiet reminder of the unexpected connection they'd shared and the complicated emotions that now accompanied it.

Over the next few years, Y/N and Spencer didn't have another chance to meet. Their paths never crossed again, but Y/N frequently heard stories about Spencer from JJ, Will, and the women of the BAU. Each tale only deepened her admiration for him, painting a picture of a man who was not only brilliant but also kind, compassionate, and remarkably dedicated.

"Spencer is something else," JJ would often say with a smile, recounting another of his incredible feats in solving a case or his sweet gestures towards his friends. "He’s always the first to lend a hand, and he’s so good with Henry. You should see them together."

Y/N would listen intently, her heart aching with each story. She couldn't shake the memory of their brief yet intense connection at the hospital. It was a feeling that lingered, haunting her thoughts and dreams.

Meanwhile, her relationship with Stephanie was becoming increasingly strained. They had grown apart over the years, their once strong bond now fraying at the edges. Stephanie was often busy with work, and their interactions became more perfunctory than affectionate. Despite this, they had gotten engaged, a decision that felt more like a logical step rather than a joyous celebration of their love.

Y/N often found herself lost in thought, wondering what her life would have been like if she had pursued a different path. The memories of Spencer, the way he made her feel so seen and understood in those few short hours, kept resurfacing.

One evening, as she sat alone in the living room, Y/N stared at the engagement ring on her finger, feeling a heavy weight in her chest. Stephanie was working late again, and the apartment felt eerily quiet. The silence gave her too much time to think, to reflect on her feelings and the growing disconnect between her and her fiancée.

She picked up her phone, scrolling through old messages and photos, and paused on a picture of Spencer from Henry's first birthday party that JJ had sent the lady’s group chat. They were both smiling, caught in a candid moment of laughter. She remembered how her heart had fluttered whenever she was near him.

Her mind wandered back to the stories JJ had shared recently. Spencer had rescued a kidnapped child, his quick thinking and bravery saving the day once again. She could hear JJ's voice, full of pride and admiration for her friend.

"He’s one of a kind," JJ had said, her eyes sparkling. "We’re all lucky to have him."

Later that evening, when Stephanie returned from work, Y/N took a deep breath and sat down with her on the couch. The conversation was long and emotional, filled with tears and difficult truths.

They both acknowledged the changes in their relationship and the love they once shared that had slowly faded.

In the end, they decided to take a break, giving themselves the space to reevaluate their relationship and their future. It was a painful decision, but one that felt right for both of them.

The sun was setting, casting a warm, golden glow over the Rossi estate. It was the perfect evening for JJ and Will's backyard wedding, and the atmosphere was filled with love and celebration. Y/N arrived, feeling a mix of excitement and nervousness. She had looked forward to this day for months, not just to celebrate her brother and JJ but also for the possibility of seeing Spencer again.

As she wandered through the beautifully decorated garden, Y/N’s heart raced with anticipation. She exchanged pleasantries with other guests, her eyes occasionally scanning the crowd, hoping to catch a glimpse of the man who had been on her mind for so long.

Finally, near a cluster of trees adorned with twinkling fairy lights, she saw him. Spencer stood slightly apart from the crowd, adjusting his tie and looking as endearing as ever. Her breath caught in her throat, and for a moment, she felt like that same girl in the hospital waiting room, her heart fluttering uncontrollably.

Gathering her courage, she made her way towards him. Spencer looked up as she approached, his eyes widening in surprise before a warm smile spread across his face.

“Y/N,” he said, his voice soft with a hint of disbelief. “Hi.”

“Hi, Spencer,” Y/N replied, her smile matching his. “It’s been a while.”

“Yeah, it has,” he said, nervously tucking his hair behind his ears. “You look… you look amazing.”

Y/N felt a blush rise to her cheeks. “Thank you. You clean up pretty well yourself.”

They both laughed, the awkwardness of the moment breaking the ice. The sound of music and laughter filled the air around them, but they seemed to be in a bubble of their own.

“So, how have you been?” Spencer asked, genuinely curious.

“I’ve been good, a lot has changed,” Y/N replied, thinking back to her recent breakup. “And you?”

“Busy with work, as usual,” Spencer said with a chuckle. “But it’s nice to take a break for something as special as this.”

“Absolutely,” Y/N agreed, feeling the old connection between them starting to resurface. “I’ve heard so much about you from JJ and Will. It’s like I’ve been keeping up with your life through them.”

Spencer’s smile turned a bit shy. “Yeah, I’ve heard a lot about you too. JJ’s quite the storyteller.”

They both laughed again, the nervousness ebbing away as they fell into a familiar rhythm. The conversation flowed, filled with giggles and shared memories, despite the years that had passed since their first meeting.

Spencer glanced down at his feet, then back up at Y/N, his expression more serious. “You know, I’ve thought about you a lot over the years.”

Y/N’s heart skipped a beat. “I’ve thought about you too, Spencer.”

They shared a quiet moment, the weight of unspoken words hanging between them. Then, with a smile that was both nervous and excited, Spencer extended his hand.

“Would you like to dance?”

Y/N’s smile widened, her heart soaring. “I’d love to.”

They moved towards the makeshift dance floor, the music wrapping around them as they swayed together. The awkwardness melted away, replaced by a feeling of rightness, as if this was where they were always meant to be.

And as they danced under the twinkling lights, surrounded by the love and joy of JJ and Will’s wedding, Y/N felt a sense of happiness and hope that she hadn’t felt in a long time. The warmth of Spencer’s presence, the ease of their conversation, and the gentle rhythm of their dance all made the world outside disappear.

After a few moments of comfortable silence, Spencer looked down at Y/N, his curiosity evident. “So, how’s Stephanie? I remember Will mentioning you two were engaged.”

Y/N felt a pang of guilt and hesitation. She had known this question would come up eventually, but it still caught her off guard. She took a deep breath, deciding to be honest. “Stephanie and I… well, we’re not together anymore.”

Spencer’s eyes widened slightly, and he looked at her with concern. “Oh, I’m sorry to hear that. What happened, if you don’t mind me asking?”

“It’s okay,” Y/N said softly, her gaze lowering for a moment. “We grew apart over the years. It became clear that we were more like friends than partners. We tried to make it work, but in the end, we realized it was best to part ways.”

Spencer nodded, his expression thoughtful. “That must have been difficult.”

“It was,” Y/N admitted, meeting his eyes again. “But it was the right decision. We both needed to move on and find our own paths.”

He gave her hand a gentle squeeze. “I’m glad you were able to make that decision, even though it was hard. You deserve to be happy.”

Y/N felt a warmth spread through her at his words. “Thank you, Spencer. That means a lot.”

They continued to dance, the conversation flowing naturally once more. Y/N shared some of the challenges she had faced during the breakup and how she had focused on rediscovering herself. Spencer listened intently, offering support and understanding.

“You know,” Y/N said after a while, “hearing all those stories about you from JJ and the others… it always made me wonder what could have been if we had kept in touch.”

Spencer smiled, a hint of shyness in his eyes. “I’ve wondered the same thing. I thought about reaching out a few times, but I wasn’t sure if it would be appropriate.”

Y/N laughed softly. “Well, here we are now. Maybe it’s fate giving us another chance.”

“Maybe it is,” Spencer agreed, his smile growing. “I’d like to think so.”

As the song ended, they stopped dancing but remained close, neither wanting to break the connection they had rekindled. Spencer hesitated for a moment before speaking again.

“Y/N, would you like to go out for coffee sometime? I mean, to catch up and… see where things go?”

Y/N’s heart skipped a beat. “I’d love that, Spencer.”

They exchanged numbers, their fingers brushing slightly as they did. The rest of the evening passed in a blur of laughter, stories, and the comforting presence of each other.

When the night finally came to an end, and it was time to say goodbye, Y/N felt a sense of anticipation she hadn’t felt in years. As she walked away from the Rossi estate, she couldn’t help but smile, knowing that this was just the beginning of a new chapter in her life—one filled with hope, possibility, and the promise of something truly special with Spencer.

Y/N arrived at the cozy little café, a smile already tugging at her lips as she spotted Spencer sitting at a corner table, looking around nervously. The warm, inviting aroma of freshly brewed coffee filled the air, blending with the soft hum of conversation and the gentle clinking of cups and saucers.

As she approached, Spencer’s eyes lit up, and he stood to greet her. “Y/N, hi! It’s so good to see you.”

“Hi, Spencer,” she replied, her heart fluttering with excitement. “It’s great to see you too.”

They hugged briefly, the familiarity of his presence already bringing a sense of comfort. They both sat down, and Spencer pushed a menu towards her.

“I wasn’t sure what you’d like, so I thought we could decide together,” he said, his smile shy but warm.

“Perfect,” Y/N said, glancing at the menu. “Do you have a favorite here?”

Spencer nodded. “The lavender latte is really good, and their pastries are amazing. I usually go for the almond croissant.”

“Lavender latte sounds interesting,” Y/N said, her curiosity piqued. “Let’s go with that and two almond croissants?”

“Great choice,” Spencer agreed, signaling the waiter.

Once their order was placed, they settled into an easy conversation. There was a lightness to their interaction, a mutual understanding that they didn’t want to waste any more time. The years apart had only intensified their appreciation for each other’s company.

“So, what have you been up to since the wedding?” Spencer asked, his eyes twinkling with genuine interest.

Y/N smiled, leaning in slightly. “I’ve been focusing on my career and spending a lot of time with my family. I’ve also picked up a few hobbies, like painting. It’s been really therapeutic.”

“Painting? That’s wonderful,” Spencer said, his admiration clear. “I’d love to see your work sometime.”

“I’d love to show you,” Y/N replied, feeling a blush creep up her cheeks. “What about you? Any interesting cases lately?”

Spencer chuckled, shaking his head. “Every case is interesting in its own way, but some are definitely more challenging than others. It keeps me on my toes.”

“I can imagine,” Y/N said, her tone playful. “You’re always the hero, aren’t you?”

Spencer’s cheeks turned a slight shade of pink. “I wouldn’t say that, but I do my best.”

Their drinks and pastries arrived, and they took a moment to savor the first sip. The lavender latte was fragrant and soothing, and the croissants were buttery and flaky, just as Spencer had promised.

“This is amazing,” Y/N said, closing her eyes for a moment to enjoy the taste.

“I’m glad you like

it,” Spencer replied, his smile widening. “I’ve thought about this a lot, you know. Just being able to talk to you.”

“Me too,” Y/N said softly, her eyes meeting his. “It feels like we’ve been given a second chance, and I don’t want to waste it.”

“Neither do I,” Spencer said, his voice earnest.

They continued to talk, their conversation punctuated with laughter and shared memories. The flirtation was natural and effortless, each playful comment bringing them closer.

“You have a way of making even the most complicated things sound fascinating,” Y/N said, her eyes sparkling. “I could listen to you talk all day.”

Spencer chuckled, a hint of shyness in his demeanor. “And you have a way of making me feel like the most interesting person in the room.”

“You are,” Y/N said, her tone sincere. “At least to me.”

They finished their coffee, but neither made a move to leave. The connection between them was undeniable, and they both knew they wanted more.

“Y/N,” Spencer said, reaching across the table to take her hand, “I’m really happy we’re here together. It feels right.”

“It does,” Y/N agreed, her fingers intertwining with his. “I’ve thought about this moment so many times, and now that it’s here, it’s even better than I imagined.”

“Me too,” Spencer said, his voice filled with emotion. “I don’t want to rush things, but I also don’t want to let go of this feeling. Can we see each other again soon?”

“Absolutely,” Y/N replied without hesitation.

Y/N and Spencer left the café, their hands still intertwined, and strolled down the charming, tree-lined street. The morning air was cool and refreshing, and the bright sun cast a romantic glow on the cobblestone path.

As they walked, Y/N couldn’t help but steal glances at Spencer. There was something about the way his eyes sparkled and his smile turned shy that made her heart race. She decided to push the conversation into more playful, flirtatious territory.

“So, Dr. Reid,” she said, her voice light and teasing, “do you always sweep women off their feet with your extensive knowledge of, well, everything?”

Spencer chuckled, his cheeks flushing slightly. “I don’t know about that. I think you’re giving me too much credit.”

Y/N raised an eyebrow, her smile mischievous. “Oh, come on. You’ve got to have a few tricks up your sleeve. I bet you’ve got all sorts of interesting facts to impress the ladies.”

Spencer laughed, a sound that sent a pleasant shiver down Y/N’s spine. “Well, I do know a lot of facts, but I’m not sure how impressive they are. For example, did you know that kissing burns 6.4 calories a minute?”

Y/N stopped walking, turning to face him with a playful grin. “Is that so? And how exactly did you come across that piece of information?”

Spencer’s smile turned a bit sheepish. “Let’s just say I read a lot.”

She took a step closer, their bodies almost touching. “That’s quite an interesting fact. Do you have any others related to kissing?”

Spencer’s breath hitched slightly, his eyes locked onto hers. “Well, there’s also the fact that kissing releases dopamine, which can make you feel happy and relaxed.”

Y/N tilted her head, her voice dropping to a whisper. “Sounds like a pretty compelling argument for kissing.”

The tension between them was palpable, a magnetic pull drawing them closer. Spencer reached up, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear, his touch sending sparks through her skin.

“Y/N,” he said softly, his voice filled with a mix of desire and nervousness. “I’ve thought about kissing you since the day we met.”

Y/N’s heart raced, her breath catching in her throat. “I’ve thought about it too, Spencer.”

They stood there, inches apart, the world around them fading away. Spencer’s hand cupped her cheek, his thumb gently stroking her skin. The anticipation was electric, every moment stretching out as they savored the closeness.

Finally, Spencer leaned in, his lips brushing hers in a tentative, tender kiss. It was soft at first, a gentle exploration, but the heat between them quickly intensified. Y/N responded eagerly, her hands slipping around his neck as she pressed herself against him.

Spencer’s arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her closer as the kiss deepened. Their lips moved in perfect sync, a dance of passion and longing that had been building for years. The world around them disappeared, leaving only the two of them, lost in the moment.

When they finally pulled apart, both were breathless, their foreheads resting against each other’s. Spencer’s eyes were dark with desire, and Y/N could feel her own pulse pounding in her ears.

“That was…” Spencer began, his voice husky.

“Amazing,” Y/N finished for him, a satisfied smile spreading across her face.

Spencer laughed softly, his hands still holding her close. “Yeah, amazing.”

They resumed walking, their hands clasped tightly together. The playful banter continued, but now there was an added layer of intimacy and sexual tension. Every touch, every glance carried the promise of more, a tantalizing hint of what was to come.

As they reached the end of the street, Y/N turned to Spencer with a playful glint in her eye. “So, Dr. Reid, are there any other fascinating facts you’d like to share with me?”

Spencer grinned, leaning in to whisper in her ear, lips brushing against it sensually. “I have plenty more where those came from. But maybe I should save some for our next date?”

Y/N laughed nervously, her heart racing with sudden arousal. “I’d like that. I’d like that a lot.”

They shared another lingering kiss under the shade of a tree, the promise of future dates and shared moments hanging in the air between them. In that moment, Y/N knew she had found something truly special with Spencer, and she couldn’t wait to see where their journey would take them. Her ring finger was feeling a little too light nowadays anyway.

[yourmumsweirdshit]

Alive - Part 1

Gwen Stacy x Reader

Masterlist

Gwen misses you. Not a day goes by where you’re not on her mind. The memories of you bleeding out in her arms flash repeatedly in her head. She lost you almost a year ago and she wasn't feeling any better than the day you left her. Every night she continues to wake up in pools of her own sweat as she jolts up, trying to catch her breath as she looks towards the photo of the two of you on her drawer, thinking of what went wrong, how she could've saved you. The guilt of your death gnaws at her constantly. Like the neverending cycle she seemed to be stuck in after your death, she continues to grab the picture, holding it in her hands as she does every night after each nightmare and stares at you, your smile.

The same one you held on your face as you took your last breaths, trying to be strong for her. Where did it all go wrong? She always seems to forget how it happened, the only part she continuously remembers is you dying. But as the vicious cycle goes and never ends she thinks back to the moments, the blurred lines becoming clear as she’s pulled back to the moment you carelessly throw yourself in front of her while she’s waiting for the pain that never arrives. You stole it from her. You lost your life for something stupid, you lost your life for her. It wasn’t meant to go this way, it wasn’t supposed to be you, what happened to you should’ve happened to her.

She was supposed to take the hit, she was meant to fall down and cry out in pain, not you. You were meant to be the one that finished high school and do something good with your life. She knows what she signs up for when she puts on the mask, the second she puts it on, it’s like signing a contract, understanding what may or may not happen to her. She knows the risk, she accepted the risk. You didn't. You had no idea what you were getting into when she approached you, complimenting the school project you presented to the class, something you thought would be good for vigilantes like Spider-woman. Curious to know more about it, she approached you after the class ended.

Originally, she thought approaching you was one of the best decisions she had ever made. Over the next few weeks you two had become stuck together like glue, having similar interests and hobbies. You both began ditching your own friends at lunch to continue talking with one another. Both of you drawn to each other like a moth to a flame. You were barely seen apart, you walked to classes together, even if you didn’t have the same subject, neither of you cared for being late to your own classes as long as you got to spend another minute with each other.

After school you’d usually stay with her for band practice, doing your homework while she played the drums. When she finished you'd walk together and usually stop at a cafe on the way to her house. Now she avoids taking that route home, preferring to walk an extra 10 minutes in hopes that she isn't haunted with the reminder of you any longer. Her efforts always fail as you never really leave her mind. The first week or so after your death was the most agonising, she seeked for you during school, only to remember what happened because of the constant pitiful looks she received from her peers.

When she hit the third week mark she began to feel something else, something different. Sometimes you’d feel distant, like you’re there, just far away, as if you’ve gone on vacation and she’s just missing you, it was a numb feeling, all she knew was that she missed you and couldn’t feel anything past that. It was a rare feeling to her, foreign, but it had happened a few times, mostly during the first month or 2 after you passed.

By now she had cut off communication with everyone, with her family, friends, band members, peers. Everyone. When she began pulling away her friends noticed and tried to stop her, repeatedly trying to hold onto her, keep her close. But she wouldn’t let them. She kept on distancing herself until they wouldn’t dare speak to her, only giving her a smile in the hallways. Everyone she had known and everything she loved had become nothing to her. All she wanted was you to come back, that was the only thing that could pull her out of this depression she slipped into, or that’s what she thought.

To say meeting other spider-people was a relief is an understatement. It gave her a feeling she hadn’t felt since you, being understood. You listened to her and made her feel heard. You were her support, her lifeline. Things that she had no one to turn to about didn’t exist when you were around. But since you weren’t here, she needed something else, someone else. Like a gift from God she was given not one but 5 people who have been through what she has, and have struggled with the same things. The universe gave her that break that she so desperately needed, she might not have been aware of it at first but she needed it. It got her away from you and what happened to you, now that doesn’t mean you left her mind. You never did, but with the help of the other spiders she didn’t feel so lost anymore, so unsure of what was going to happen.

For the first time in what felt like forever she didn’t feel so suffocated anymore, finally being able to take a breath of fresh air. Like her head has finally come out from underneath the water, the water you pulled her under. She was holding onto something that wasn’t there anymore. She needed to let go or she’d drown too. When you first met her she was under a lot of pressure, only just beginning to understand her abilities. You were her escape, no stress when she was with you, nothing was short of amazing when she was with you. Now, with you gone you seem to add onto the load she’s already got, the freedom you used to give her now being replaced with guilt, anger and sorrow. You can’t give her what she so desperately yearns for, what she craves for. What she needs.

This getaway she had with the other spiders got her through the pain you gave her, now leaving something similar to a bittersweet ending. Way more bitter than sweet, but its progress, she’s getting there slowly, step by step. When she got back home she had landed in a familiar setting, one she hadn’t been in for months but one she’d never forget. The alley she lost you in. Her chest tightens as she looks around, tears stinging her eyes as she looks around, the memories rush to her like it just happened. Her breathing becomes uneven as she feels the ghost of your body in her arms as she sits down where she picked you up to hold you. But her breath catches in her throat when someone grabs a hold of her shoulder.

Another Spider-Man? He takes her to a place he calls the lobby, filled with other spider-people. It’s not too long before the man she now knows as Miguel O’Hara begins to take her on missions. Her latest one was versing the vulture, she did it with ease, with grace, like a ballerina. She takes a deep breath as she looks down making sure everyone is okay. She doesn't get the chance to look too long because someone begins to clap from the sidelines. She turns her head to be greeted with a person she's longed to see for so long, one she's been dying to see. “Y/N?” She whispers as Miguel walks over to you, now standing beside you as you begin to engage in conversation with him. She isn't given the chance to stare a little longer because Jessica begins to call her over.

“I want you to meet a good friend of mine. Y/N.” Jess introduces you to the girl who’s still got her mask on. Her breathing begins to grow laboured the longer she stares at you. The heartache in her chest is stronger than ever as she fights the urge to reach out and touch you as well as cry and break down all at the same time. “Nice to meet you …?” You say, waiting for a name which she doesn't give. “Gwen, she must be tired from that amazing stunt she just pulled.” Jessica speaks for the white spider. Your smile falters for a split second before nodding in understanding. “I hope to see you around Gwen.” You respond before walking off with Miguel, looking back once more in hopes her mask would be off but she’s frozen in the same spot you left her.

“You alright there?” Jess asks as she puts a hand on Gwen's shoulder. “Hmm? What? Oh yeah, I’m good.” She responds as she pulls her eyes from you. “That doesn't sound very reassuring.” She comments with a laugh while Gwen pulls her mask off. “L/N?” Gwen whispers, her eyes moving to Jess. Jess looks from your fading figure in the distance to Gwen. “Yeah, how did you-” She stops mid sentence as she meets Gwen's eyes. “Something happened to her in your universe, didn’t it?” She asks as Gwens eyes go back to you. That can't be you, no way. You died 9 months ago, she saw you die, you died in her arms, she held you until your last breath, she heard your last heartbeat. But somehow, here you are, looking like nothing happened and that you just continued to age and grow in time with her.

“Hey, if you want, I can tell Miguel to do missions without her, avoid her, might make you feel better.” Jess says as she rubs her hand soothingly on her back. “No.” Gwen responds a bit too quickly, but she didn't care, the universe just gave her a second chance, a do over, a way to fix her mistake or prevent it from ever happening again. She wasn’t about to lose it that quickly.

[safiredreams]

Aries Sun - Moon Combinations

Aries Sun - Aries Moon: A person who is not afraid to rush into places where others fear to tread. Impatient and energetic, very easy to rile up. When an idea strikes there is no stopping them, go getters. Rushes headfirst into life. Can be prone to temper tantrums, easily bruised ego. They enjoy being challenged and are not afraid to call people out. Often struggle with selfishness and my way or no way attitude. Can hurt others by being too blunt with their opinions. Fast paced, extremely independent and rarely care about what other people think of them. If they want something, then you better get out of their way. Entrepreneur energy. Can get bored easily if things aren’t moving fast enough.

Aries Sun - Taurus Moon: A person who needs to enjoy living. If they desire something, then they will go ahead and treat themselves to it. Passionate and determined to achieve their goals. A strong opponent to have. They have stamina to keep going, enduring energy levels and if they decide to reach the top then most likely they will, even if it takes them a bit longer. Independent and yet can feel dependent on certain belongings and people, they need a sense of security to feel safe and emotionally fulfilled. Can treat themselves a bit too much. Great companion, easy to chill out with. Can get lazy and just stop all pursuits out of seemingly nowhere. Prone to self-centeredness.

Aries Sun - Gemini Moon: A person with a quick mentality. One of those people that will change subjects every thirty seconds, very excitable. Can trail off into tangents. Their quick wit is something both admired and despised. Sometimes can feel like they are shoving their ideas down other people’s throats. Great sense of humour. The type of person that walks into a room and forgets why. Eternal child energy that appeals to so many people. The person at the party that knows everyone even if they don’t. Can have a hard time sticking to goals, the type that wants this then that and then something else sounds great too. Fear of missing out. Falling in love with the cute barista one day then the cute bartender the next. Can say some pretty insensitive things.

Aries Sun - Cancer Moon: The person rushing to rescue the distressed lover. Full of courage and poetry. A sensitive individual that can mask this sensitivity by being aggressive and standoffish. Desires to create, to bring something into existence. Can connect to people easily and charm them into following them into the battlefield. You want to win, losing is too much pain. More understanding and careful when expressing one’s ambitions than the other Aries Sun and Moon combinations. Trust your emotions when jumping into ventures. Cannot keep going and pursuing unless emotions are invested and fulfilled. Loves to be taken care of like a child loved by their mother.

Aries Sun - Leo Moon: A person full of energy, drive, passion and pride. The main character of their own story and often wants to be the main character of everyone else’s story. Full of emotions, decisions are made rapidly with the heart leading the way. Intuition is to be trusted always. A performative person, heard from miles away. Wants to lead. Being oneself and not following trends is important. Attention getter. Can be too bossy. Born to be adored but is very adoring of others themselves. A classic lover, romance is everything, romanticizing their lives. Can struggle with feelings of grandeur. Loyal companion and friend, committed to those they love. Needs to feel important.

Aries Sun - Virgo Moon: A person that leads by example. Analytical and not as messy as other Aries Suns. Likes to tidy up their own messes. A real prim and sturdy entity. Think business casual talking about sport. Daily habits are important, so is staying physically fit. Needs to put things in order, great at delegating. If they impulsively pursue desires or throw words around without thinking can struggle with a sense of shame and guilt. More pulled back with their fiery nature. Great with their hands, can become a master of their craft. They don’t want a completely boring life, settling down is important but so it adventure and excitement. Can become too critical, both of self and others.

Aries Sun - Libra Moon: A person that has a hard time finding the balance between independence and connection with others. They require others to feel fulfilled yet their need to learn to be independent can often cause confusion and frustration. A harder time going after what they want, A harder time going after what they want, their vision doesn’t always match others and that can cause sadness and despair. A great communicator, a romantic vision of life and of who they are and aspire to be. Can feel like other people get in the way of what they want. Diplomacy comes easier. It’s important for them to not let other people’s desires and feelings get in the way of their own pursuit of themselves and their goals. Artistic talent is often present and so is social charm. Great flirts.

Aries Sun - Scorpio Moon: A person with a strong presence. A complete go getter, the type to withstand turbulent life storms to get to a place where they want to be. A hardened resilience. Dramatic and can let their anger consume them if not careful. May turn on themselves. A sort of burning fire in their heart. Sometimes words cut like daggers, can get too pushy, too abrasive with themselves and others. Can wait to make their move, harder to push past their limit. Competitive to the core and can be outright rude. Sarcastic and passionate tongues. Great sense of humour, often dry. They like people who can stand up to them. A sense of integrity is key. Realisation that they won’t always be the best in the room.

Aries Sun - Sagittarius Moon: A person that is seen as the life of the party. Fun loving and ready to strike up any conversation. They shoot their arrow fast and abrupt in one direction then turn and shoot the next in another. Impatient. Often really loved by random people, so joyous and full of life force that they can draw in anyone into their aura. Can be too honest when their honesty is not needed. Doesn’t have the easiest time settling down, always searching for the next big thing, the thing that will make the stay. Staying true to their morals is important, standing their ground and not letting corruption get their truthful and naïve spirit. Enjoys spontaneity and optimism that seems to help them get the best in life. Philosophers.

Aries Sun - Capricorn Moon: A person who knows how to be a boss. Often, they have responsibility early on in life and they carry on that responsible attitude into adulthood. Realists. Achieving high ranks and standards are immensely important. Laziness will never work. Entrepreneurs that build from the ground up. A solid skin that is hard to penetrate, insults that seem to never hit the mark when thrown at them. Ambition and achievement. A steady rhythm and a good, paced climb to the top of the mountain. Sensible and rational personalities. Learns from their mistakes.

Aries Sun - Aquarius Moon: A person for the people. They are a strange paradox between selfish and selfless. The type that does acts of kindness out of nowhere. Others may see them as uncaring and self-centred and yet they show up as the greatest friend out of seemingly nowhere. Not a follower, should be a tend setter. If they start following their own strange desires and dreams, then they will feel fulfilled. Can slow down and think things through before rushing into action. Not as volatile in their emotions. Does not enjoy routines, life should be a rollercoaster. Can overestimate their own genius. People are important to them. Pioneering spirit, altruism is often an important pursuit. Detached in personal relationships at times, too passionate at others.

Aries Sun - Pisces Moon: A person strong yet so gentle. They are so strong, yet they do not want to harm even a fly. Independence and assertion are mixed with a tenderness and languid nature. Intuition is to be trusted, ideas and desires that don’t make sense logically can be pursued to great success and emotional fulfilment. Can take a leadership role but can listen and allow others to take control. Can struggle at times to pursue ideas headfirst, slower at rushing in. Needs a close bond with someone special to them. Can be too trusting of bad people. Can translate illusive ideas into reality, creative pursuits are important. Damsel in distress trope. Rescuing or wanting to be rescued.

[hedwig394]

I'm Not Yours

Derek Hale x Sarah McCall

Timeline: In S2E4, when Derek is training his betas, one of them tries to kiss him.

Derek's POV -

Isaac barrels towards me with a vicious look on his face. I stare at him, unfazed. Like that can scare me. He leaps at me but I push him out of the way effortlessly. Sure, the momentum makes it difficult, but not difficult enough.

Erica jumps at me from above and I toss her to the ground. She's no better. In fact, she's worse. Isaac at least has the mind to know that he isn't the best, but Erica is full of overconfidence. It's going to get her in trouble someday.

Boyd looks at from above, and cringes as both the betas fall to the ground. I know their bones are broken, they must be. Guilt creeps up my spine, but I shove it down. If I'm to teach them how to protect themselves, then they must sustain a few injuries.

"Does anyone wanna try not being completely predictable?" I ask with a frown.

It is then that Erica jumps at me. But she doesn't try to attack. Instead, she wraps her legs around my waist and presses her lips to mine. Eyes widening in shock, I push her away immediately.

"Don't ever do that again," I say, fury churning through my body. My eyes flash red and I see fear in hers, but I don't care.

I don't want to be kissed by anyone who isn't Sarah.

"Why?" She asks, scared, "Because I'm a Beta?"

"No." I say, "Because I'm Not Yours." I make sure to wipe my lips, just in case her lipstick has left a mark.

Isaac groans from beside her, uninterested in what just happened. "Are we done? I got about a hundred bones that need a few hours to heal."

I bend down in front of him and break his finger, "A hundred and one."

Isaac looks at me in shock and pain, and I hiss at him. "You think I'm teaching you to fight? Huh? Look at me! I'm teaching you how to survive! So if you don't wanna die, I suggest you take this seriously."

I stalk away from them and rush to my loft after putting my jacket on. I had promised to meet Sarah there, and I don't wanna be late. I don't want to miss even a single minute I have with her. Her brother thinks that it's just him who has to do a lot just to see his girlfriend, but he's wrong.

I have to do twice as much just to catch a glimpse of Sarah.

She waits at me at the loft, her long hair flowing behind her because of the wind.

"Angel..." I say. It's one of the few nicknames I have for her, another main one being 'honey'. She turns around and looks at me. Joy fills her eyes and she rushes towards me, throwing her arms around me. She doesn't care that I smell like tar and dirt, doesn't care that the dirt is all over my clothes and face.

I wrap my arms around her, breathing in the scent of her sweet-smelling hair. I kiss her cheek and all the emotions I've bottled down almost spill out. No, I can't let that happen. I have to stay strong for her.

She steps back and looks at me with tearful eyes. I pull her towards me and kiss her deeply, savouring the flavour and taste of her soft lips. She opens her mouth and I slip my tongue inside, exploring her mouth. She tastes like the sweet fruit at the end of countless hardships.

Sarah tastes like mine. There's not a lot I can call mine, but Sarah is mine. And I'll be damned to let anyone hurt her or take her away from me.

And the moan she gives makes me wanna carry her inside and show her just that.

But I have to keep the lust in control since I'd rather talk to her and hold her in my arms in those few stolen moments we have together than have sex with her.

I draw my head to let her catch her breath. I can go on for longer, werewolf lungs and all. But she's human. My human.

I caress her cheek gently and press a kiss to her forehead. "I've missed you, my Angel."

"I've missed you too, Sourwolf." She sniffs.

"Come on," I say, "Let's go inside."

She slips her hand in mine and we walk inside the loft. Sarah beams at the simple arrangement of the place and looks at me. "I've missed coming here."

"I know, I'm sorry," I say ruefully. The loft has not been the same without her. After we got together officially, Sarah used to hang out at the loft frequently. At one point, she was living with me. Those were the best days of my life. Just being with her, inside her and spending time in her presence gave me more happiness than anything else.

But then Gerard Argent showed up along with his pack of Hunters. I turned Isaac and Erica, and Sarah's brother started to hate me. I don't care, Scott's a child. He'll understand the ways of the world after growing up.

But unknowingly, that caused a rift between me and Sarah. It was too unsafe for her to be with me, with hunters prowling around and an unknown beast to add to the list. I know how low Gerard can sink, he can threaten and hurt Sarah just to get to me.

I once had a thought of breaking up with her for her own safety, but she had said to me "I'll carve your heart out with a scalpel and keep it as a prized possession if you ever do that." And that had led to a passionate make-out session.

"Derek..." Sarah's voice makes me look at her. But she isn't looking at me, she's staring at my jacket. "Why do you smell like women's perfume?"

Aah, that is Erica's fault. "Oh, it's nothing. I was going to tell you." I begin casually, but she looks anything but casual. Sarah's glaring at me like she never has before, and I gulp. "Angel, believe me, it's not what you think."

"Then what is it?" She hisses viciously, and at that moment, I can't help but admire how strong and confident she looks.

Right, back to the point.

I explain everything to her, starting from training to the point where Erica kissed me, and at the end, Sarah looks like she could commit first-degree murder. "I pushed her away immediately," I say, desperation clawing at my insides. Will she believe me?

Sarah glares at me. Then, she looks at her feet with a sigh. "Do you like her, Derek?"

"No!" I exclaim, aghast. "Honey, she's my beta, and she's also underage. I don't like her. I don't like anyone but you."

She doesn't look at me. "It's fine, Derek. If you don't like me anymore. I get it. It's been a hard couple of months. And I understand if you wanna be with me. Maybe a werewolf will be better for you."

"Sarah," I ball my hand into a fist. "Look at me."

She doesn't budge, and I gently lift her chin up. Her warm, chocolate eyes meet my werewolf red. She looks a bit frightened, and I wrap my arm around her, pulling her hard against me.

"Look at me, Angel." I growl, "You're the only one I like, the only one I want. So don't even think for a second that I'll look at anyone else the way I look at you."

"I'm sorry," She says and my eyes go back to the usual green. "It's been so hard recently, so I thought that you'd give up and...." She looks at me worriedly, "Start looking for someone else."

"Sarah," I say calmly, "It's been very hard, yes. But I'm not giving up on you. On us. It's you for me, Angel."

Sarah gives me a shaky smile, and I continue, "And as for Erica, I pushed her away immediately and warned her to not do that again. You know why?"

She looks at me expectantly and I kiss her softly. "Because I'm not hers, Angel. I'm yours."

Masterlist

[vxlentinescookies]

This is a sequel of the previous Dark Cacao one were they fought and everything

Things have calmed down now, the awkward moment has open space for some time, peace and some further talks

But Dark Cacao has come into term with a little something

He likes Reader Cookie: (use any pronouns) are/is strong, resourceful, agile and very skilled, he could see so much potential, and it's a surprise to find someone who not only knows their way in a fight, but ALSO can match HIM

He wants to ask her out, the issue is: how!?

He was not a single clue, time to ask his soldiers for advise I guess?

Maybe even contact hollyberry?

(To resume, this is Dark Cacao finally knowing he likes Reader Cookie, asks others for advise to ask them out and fails miserably, but Reader Cookie is so amazed at the brave [though failed] attempt that decides to give the idea of a date a try)

→ ❛Between the sword and your opponent, pt. 2❜

→ Pairing ; Dark Cacao Cookie x Reader → Quote ; ❛❛It surely didnt go according to plan but, to say Hollyberry, who had been listening intently from behind one of the pillars, wasnt satisfied, would be an understatement.❜❜ → Genre ; Drama , Romance → A/N ; This was very fun hahah, pt 1 is here!

Its been a good few days after the incident, the one where you shamelessly flirted with Dark Cacao in the middle of a fight. To say the king hadnt been thinking about it was… an understatement, he had thought about it, quite a lot. It had leaked into his daily like like the growing vines of grapes, and in return, they were twisting and shaping around his brain like a deadly respite. This, paired with the following talks you both had about the help the kingdom of Rose Champagne wanted to offer to the kingdom of Cacao, and the inevitable flirting that came with your personality, Dark Cacao seemed to inevitably start falling in love. It was a force of nature he didnt expect, that he didnt take in consideration, but as time passed, he realized that these feelings were ever present, and that there was no way he could keep them hidden.

Love, for Dark Cacao, was something he had long since given up on. He no longer seeked it, and he no longer expected it, especially after the falling out with his previous wife and the loss of his son, that he still deep down loved dearly, he no longer felt he had a place in the grounds of love, therefore, he simply stayed on his own place, allowing himself to be moved by the currents of life while focusing on the current moments with his kingdom, his subjects, and the war ever present with Dark Enchantress Cookie.

Thats perhaps what made this moment the more jarring to him, to be flirted with after he felt unlovable, after he felt undeserving of being loved—And then, the fact that his heart was starting to beat with fervor and energy yet again, for someone he once hurt unintentionally… It put his mind and heart at a standstill, confused as to how to proceed, confused as to what to do exactly.

“Damn, sounds like you’re deep in the trenches of love, old friend” Hollyberry would tell them once Dark Cacao sought them out for help, after all, out of all his comrades, the hollyberrian was the most capable when it cames to matters of love.

“Sigh, Im just, confused as what to do… I’ve given up on love a long time ago…” He said, looking down for a few moments, before turning back at her.

His hands were tainted with blood, and his mind haunted by the warriors long lost in the wars the cacao kingdom had been part of, not to mention the small guilt that followed him for having fallen in the trap that was Affogato’s tricks. He sighed yet again, because then there was you, someone hurt unintentionally by his hand, even if he was under the tricks of the snake, he still felt like he owed his people something. 

“Oh c’mon, rid yourself of that long face, Dark Cacao!” Hollyberry would snap him of his thoughts, as she’d laugh heartily “Its clear what you must do, you must act upon your emotions!”

“Act… Upon my emotions?” He felt like he stayed in square one, unable to think of what exact way to move thorough this new challenge. “Right, but, how exactly?”

“You speak as if you hadnt been in a marriage once!” She spoke yet again, frowning for a moment before patting his back lively, and perhaps a bit too strongly “Fret not! What you must do, is confess and ask her out on a date! Dosent that sound logical?”

Right, a date… If only he wasnt rusty in these themes, perhaps the idea would’ve seemed more appetizing, but as it stood, he was confused and didnt know exactly what to do or say. Hollyberry, noticing this, would just sigh and shake her head, she thought Pure Vanilla was THE challenge in the ancient’s groups when it came to love, but Dark Cacao? Now he was winning second place.

You had been resting in your quarters, quietly taking a nap when it happened, a soldier knocking on your door causing you to wake up startled, and once the door opened, you would look confused at the soldier in question, looking at you with seriousness as he spoke the words sent by his majesty. He was requesting your presence in the throne room, words that left you dumbfounded as you brushed hair out of your face before nodding. You didnt put much thought about it, as you dressed to come see Dark Cacao in the throne room.

Walking towards the castle suddenly felt colder than usual, and your steps felt heavier, as if you were expecting something bad to happen, but thinking about it, the worse that could happen would be Dark Cacao shaming you and sending you back after your constant flirting… which didnt seem to be the case, if anything it did seem quite… out of character? The king didnt seem to be that fazed by your flirting, so… But on the other side, you could be expecting the end of the trip as he declared that all was well, and that the Cacao Kingdom would continue relations with the Rose Champagne Kingdom… Not really out of character and far more viable… still, if it were to be the case, why were you hesitating? Why were you feeling so heavy? Confused, you simply approached the door before stopping.

Were you, were you falling in love? No, there was no way, there was simply no way that you were falling in love with the King of the Cacao Kingdom, was it…?

“Your majesty, I’ve arrived…” You spoke as you finally took a step inside, bowing in front of the king, before he’d dismiss the other cookies in the room, letting you both alone in the room. “Is there, something you wished to discuss with me?”

“Yes, ahem… (y/n) cookie, there are some matters I must get to… involving you”

You lifted an eyebrow as he spoke, his nervousness apparent as he left the throne and walked towards you. Each step felt dangerous yet filled with a certain sense of unknown that scared you in some way. Yet you persisted, until he was right in front of you.

“Will… Ahem… Will you go on a date with me?”

“Huh?”

Now it was your turn to be taken aback. You stared at him dumbfounded as you felt all your worries and fears fade away into the dark. He looked at you curiously and you simply coughed before looking at him, smiling.

“... S-Sure, I dont mind!”

“You dont have to if you dont want to…”

“No-No, I do want to! Lets go on a date!”

It surely didnt go according to plan but, to say Hollyberry, who had been listening intently from behind one of the pillars, wasnt satisfied, would be an understatement.

[mint-yooxgi]

Longing - Yandere!Dragon!Changbin

Yandere AU & Dragon AU - First Person POV

Genre: Mature, Smutty Themes, Internal Monologue

Pairing: Changbin X Implied Chubby!Reader

Words: 1,678

Warnings: Possessive thoughts, some smutty thoughts, and some minor violent thoughts. Mentions of potential kidnapping, but nothing comes of it. This is a Yandere story, it will contain themes such as stalking, violence, obsession, possessive natures, and just general overall creepiness and swearing. You have been warned.

A/n: Again, I feel like I definitely could have made this much more feral than it is, but I think it's good! Dragon Binnie is just a softie at heart, but maybe that's just me hehehe anyways, Feedback is greatly appreciated! Enjoy!~

The Ninth of The Feral Drabbles

That human… Why does he even bother? Doesn’t he know that you’re mine?

The only thing worse than seeing how desperate this imbecile is in getting your attention, is knowing that you fall for it. Every. Single. Time.

Why does somebody as pathetic as him get to love you, and why- why, why, why, why, do you love him back?

I’ve known you for longer, but perhaps it’s the fact that I’ve waited so long to insert myself into your life that you don’t realize what’s right in front of you. I have always been ready and willing to serve you, to love you at a moment’s notice. Yet, none of that seems to matter to you. It’s so frustrating.

No, you would rather be with a mortal who can’t even protect you properly against his friends. He doesn’t stick up for you. He doesn’t defend your honour when they make nasty, pretentious comments against you, right in front of both of your faces. He lets them walk all over you, and does nothing about it!

Believe me, My Jewel, there have been a few times where I’ve had to strongly resist the urge to tear his throat out for remaining silent when those comments clearly affect you so negatively. I see the way you retreat into that shell of yours, one which I long to break you out of. You never have to worry about being too much, or too loud when you’re around me. Anyone who says otherwise will be fried to a crisp.

You should be showered in praise, not hid in a corner and talked down to in order to please others.

Come to me, My Jewel. I will let you shine. I will make you shine.

I just wish you weren’t so guarded around me.

Did I come on too strong? Am I too boisterous?

I thought that’s what you liked…

It must be him. He is the one telling you to stay away from me. He is the one keeping us apart, after all.

Oh, how I long to tear that bastard limb from limb. Only, that would make you upset, wouldn’t it? I would hate to be the reason that My Jewel loses her sheen, even if you aren’t aware of it. The guilt alone would eat me alive. Besides, it’s not like you don’t love him.

I hate that. More than anything. 

The fact that your love is wasted on someone so weak, someone so… undeserving makes me sick.

I have spent countless days and nights preparing for our life together, only for this bastard to steal you away from me. I cleaned my hoard. I rearranged the furniture. Hell, I even started decorating our nest with more things that I know you like. Only, my efforts were all in vain.

I wasn’t quick enough.

Do you not see the way I look at you? I know he does, and I know that he’s threatened by it. I am one of the strongest dragons in this territory, and I am not afraid to assert my dominance over him if need be.

I could take you by force. After all, dragons are notorious for stealing that which they desire most, especially when they wish to add such beauty to their collections. Only, I can’t bring myself to do that to you. I’m not like that, and I don’t want you to despise me. If you’re going to want me, it will be of your own free will, not because I’ve forced you to.

Which is why my situation frustrates me to no end. So badly do I want to tear you away from that no good, disgusting, vile - well, you get the point - man. However, I also know that it would devastate you. I need you to leave him of your own volition, not because I ate him in a fit of jealous rage.

Oh, how I’ve longed to torment him, too. He stole you away from me, and despite how I pride myself on how civil I can be, I have never wanted to lose control so badly before. It would be so easy, too. I could even make it look like an accident…

I won’t lie, I have thought about the various ways in which I could torment and torture him for what he’s done to us. Sometimes, those thoughts help me fall asleep, but then I picture you resting in my arms, and I manage to calm myself down.

You just have that affect on me. You make me want to be better - do better. I want to make you happy, and I will. I promise you that.

Eventually.

I’m working on a plan to help drive you into my arms, and after what I witnessed tonight, I’ll be putting it into motion much sooner, rather than later.

I almost lost my temper tonight, My Jewel. Something that has not happened to me in years. However, seeing that- that- that thing with his hands all over you drove me insane.

Doesn’t he know not to touch the art? Priceless artifacts are meant to be shown off and displayed, not for grimy hands to smear dirt all over their beauty.

Well, unless you’re a dragon like me. Then, it’s okay. At least I know how to take care of treasure, and that’s exactly what you are, Jewel. You are the finest treasure this world has ever seen, and I will spend every day of the rest of our lives proving that to you.

Though, please don’t think I view you as some kind of trophy. I may consider you to be the greatest Jewel in my collection, but that does not mean I see you as an object. I wouldn’t be going to such great lengths to have you if I did, and I never want you to think that. I don’t own you, but I will admit, long since have I desired to be able to call you mine. I desperately want you to call me yours, too.

I will protect you. I will provide for you. Anything and everything that you could ever dream of. I want to make all of your dreams come true, and then some. You honestly have no idea what you mean to me, what you do to me. So badly, I want to spend time with each other, getting to know every minuscule detail about the other’s interests and hobbies. Then, I want to partake in them all with you.

You, and you alone.

There is nothing I desire more than your happiness, and I know for a fact that you will find the greatest joy when you’re with me.

Honestly, My Jewel, when it comes down to it, I desperately long to please you. In any and every way I can. In every and any way imaginable.

I want to cook for you. I want to cook with you, and see you smile at me when I eventually fuck up the recipe because despite my best efforts, I am a horrible cook. They say it’s the thought that counts, though, right?

I want to go for walks together, exploring places you could never have thought up even in your wildest dreams. I want to show you my hoard, and let you pick out the finest of gems so I can make you a crown, a necklace, a ring. Anything to have you shining like the Jewel I know you are.

More than all of that, though, I want everyone to know that you’re mine, and I’m yours.

I want to please you in every intimate, intricate way you’ll let me. I adore you, My Jewel, and I just wish that you could see that.

I certainly adore you more than he does.

Does he even know how to please another person? Fuck, I was getting so heated watching his pitiful attempts to bring you pleasure. Even I could tell you were faking it.

Don’t you know you’d never have to fake anything with me? I would kill to be able to touch you, My Jewel. I have long since desired to learn every aspect of your body so that only I can be able to bring you the utmost pleasure in the most intimate of ways.

Let me get lost in the heat that radiates from between your legs. Let me spend hours licking at every part of you, until the only thing you can think about is the way my tongue feels on your skin. I want my name to be the only thing you can utter from those sinful lips of your, moaning praises meant for me and me alone.

Let me roam my hands all over that delectable body of yours. Let me carve my marks into your skin, so that everyone will know who has loved you in the most fulfilling of ways. I long to know what your body feels like pressing against my own, your arms wrapped around my back as your hands pull me in closer. I want your nails carving your own marks into my skin, claiming me as your own.

I’d let you see my wings. Hell, I’d even let you touch them as I’m making love to you. Maybe I’ll even tease you with my fangs, and my claws. A little bit of danger which in the throws of passionate loving never hurt anyone. Besides, I believe it would make things a bit more thrilling, don’t you?

Please, My Jewel, let me fulfill our greatest desires as one. Let me claim you as my own, and mark you with the most sacred of intimacies I know how. I promise you’ll never know fear, you’ll never know doubt. Only happiness, and an unquestionable, unshakable loyalty and love from the one who has always been desperately devoted to you from the start. The one who has been longing for your embrace far before I even knew what this feeling bursting inside of my chest was.

Please, just let me love you.

[martiandmichelle]

Me during a "blue" photo session. This is a God awful photo because, for some reason, in the middle of everything, I decided I needed a really good, deep stretch. You all know what that's like, right? You contort your body and say "fuck it" to the world until you get the kinks out. Well, that's me here, arms cocked, knees pointing in awkward directions, the works. But THE TITS still shone through.

OK, so that's my intro to what will be a kinda long post. (I wanted to give you something to look at before you went through the long read.) I need to make it a roundabout story but it's important and will kinda tie in to the one I started from the agency meeting.

So if you're completely offended by what I like to call "Relations with Relations" - RwR - or maybe more accurately "Sexual relations with relations" (otherwise officially known by a work whose first syllable is the opposite of "out" and whose second syllable rhymes with "nest" but begins with a "c;" yeah, you know what I'm talking about) than I suggest you tune out now. Otherwise, get yourself a nice cup of Joe, or glass of wine, or pint of beer, or whatever, and settle in for a totally sexual read.

(A side note: please don't hold me down to dates and names and whether or not I leave someone out. My body may look and feel like I'm in my 40's and now with my face lift, so do my looks, but my insides and brain are still 73 years old. Time in my brain is variable so dates have as much chance of being wrong as right. I no longer drive because I get lost - and because my boobs get in the way. I have no sense of direction. But, by God, I can read a movie script once and remember it on set. The brain is a weird thing.)

My first RwR happened a few days after my 18th birthday (God, almost 56 years ago!) when my 3-year older brother Chris, a big oaf of a man, not very bright but strong as hell, tried to rape me. He had a tiny small engine repair, small electonics repair shop in the middle of Nowhere, South Georgia and I would keep his books while I finished high school, what little accounts receivable he had. So it was early in my senior year of high school just after my 18th birthday that he came after me. I was already a DDD cup by then and he wanted them. I began to fight him off, as if I could, until it dawned on me: why fight it - maybe you'll like it. So I quit fighting and gave myself to him, both of us virgins. Well, I was spoiled from the beginning as the big klutz carried a 13 inch monster between his legs. For the next 4 years we had a torrid sexual relatoinship, especially after the rest of our family (parents and two sisters) moved away. We would fuck every morning before we opened his shop, during lunch, and all evening. He began selling me to his clients and friends and "his" business suddenly seemed successful.

It all came crashing down when I decided to find someone else so I could have children and he found religion. We began bitter enemies. Until about 4 years ago after his wife died. He decided he was merely human and not the second coming and came asking me for forgiveness - and forgiveness came with a big hug and a blowjob. Chris passed away last year at age 76.

May years passed before my next RwR. That was with my son-in-law and Michelle's then husband Phillip. Their marriage was falling apart as Michelle was as frigid as the ice in my water. My thinking was misguided and I hoped if I could satisfy Phillip's physical need then he would stay with Michelle and their two young kids, son Billy (4) and baby daughter Bonnie. I finally broke it off out of guilt. But remember two names on this list. That happened some 14 years ago.

The next RwR was with my niece, Josie, my youngest sister Marcy's daughter. She was having issues, especially sexual issues, with her husband and, as I tried to help her, it became clear that she was bisexual and had a burning desire to be with another woman, me in particular. I obliged happily. They eventually divorced, Josie got a series of breast enlargements, moved to Europe to do porn and got happily remarried. She keeps saying she's returning to the US, but not yet.

It was the following winter (2011, I think?) when one day my daughter Michelle came to me to do some sewing for her and her kids (I used to be damn good at sewing). The last thing she wanted sewed was the torn sweater she was wearing. She took it off and she wasn't wearing a bra, her huge (J cup tits - she was kinda heavy at the time) staring at me. To make her feel more comfortable I took my top off, too. I was much thinner than she so my H cups looked as big. She then admitted her problems with Phillip stem from her having very strong lesbian leanings and those leanings pointed to me. That day, I had sex with my daughter Michelle. Which, of course, led to me having sex with Michelle's wife, Maria, who you know well from this site.

About a year later Michelle set up a situation where my son Josh and she visiting me and she ripped my top off, knowing full well that Josh wanted me as much as she did. I was probably an "I" cup by then. And, well, Michelle was right. Josh and spent several years having sex every day until he got sick and was diagnosed with ALS. Josh died in November of 2019 and I still ache pretty much every day.

The rest of the RwR I'm going to list pretty quickly. There was my younger sister Rose (or Rosie) with whom I was very tightly bound physically if not emotionally - we never really saw eye-to-eye on anything. Then there was Chris's daughter, my niece, Becca, who moved in with us and is still a part of our lives and is also the one whose tits are as milky as mine. Then Becca's daughter, my grandniece, Zin(nia), again, still a part time lover of mine. Lastly, and I'm sure I've forgotten somebody (or somebodies) and two I haven't even mentioned here are my youngest sister Marcy and her husband Bryan.

So, in other words, I see no more boundary of having relations with relations than I would having sexual relations with anyone else. In fact, it's even sexier!

So that leads me to two weeks ago.

Often, when I have some down time, I'll go half way down the mountain from our residence to where we're building a studio. I'll wear something revealing to give the workers something to enjoy for all the hard work they do. So that day I went down there wearing some short shorts, heels, and a little tank top that maybe covered only the most delicate 25% of my boobs. I was talking to the supervisor when my cell rang. It was Roxy who was back at the house. She urged me to come back right away - that there was someone there I needed to meet with. Knowing Roxy and Kaatje and the others would never let a stranger in without plenty of reason, I agreed and took the 20 minutes walk back up the mountain.

When I walked through the front door Roxy met me with a queer expression on her face. I asked her what was wrong and she assured me that nothing was "wrong." She said there was somebody waiting for me in my study then she and Kaatje walked, unexpectedly, out the front door. Curious, I moved to my study.

There, facing a large poster of me nude on the far wall, lying on my side, my arm hiding my crotch but my huge boobs showing freely (it is my inner sanctum study after all), stood a man curiously dressed. All I could see was that he was wearing a dress shirt with, from my angle, nothing on the bottom. "May I help you?" I asked. And he turned around.

At that moment, had you slapped either one of us, our faces would shatter like cheap glass. There, wearing that dress shirt which was mostly unbuttoned and male short shorts with an impressive bulge up font stood my grandson, Billy, just graduated high school and just turned 18.

To be continued. . .

[loveandpeaceanddoughnuts]

October 31, 2018 - 7:30pm

cw: angst, established relationship, hurt/no comfort [ao3]

“How many times are we going to have this conversation, Kento?”

Her husband put his head in his hands. “I’m sorry, my love. I am. This was never what I wanted for us.”

“Then why don’t you change it? Why are you still working yourself to death?”

Nanami dragged his hands down his face. “There are people that rely on me. Children. You know I wanted out before it ever got to this point, but I can’t abandon them now.”

Her face twisted. “What about our children, Kento? How much longer are we going to wait?”

He slumped, and guilt flared in her stomach. It was a low blow and they both knew it. Nanami and his wife, Lina had wanted children for years, but it was never the right time. Nanami’s job was always too demanding. In his darker moods he considered it a lapse of judgement that he had allowed Lina to shoulder the burden of loving him, let alone bringing children into it. He had told himself for years that he would marry and settle down when he was out of the sorcery game for good. He never wanted his spouse to lie awake wondering if he’d be coming home alive.

Unfortunately for Nanami’s virtuous plans, he had fallen hard and fast for Lina. The moment they met, wide, earnest eyes locking over the pastry case in his favorite bakery, he knew that she was a woman he would break his rules for.

Lina had always known that loving Kento would come with sacrifices. He had always been honest with her about the realities of his life, and she had never regretted the trade. Recently, though, the late nights had been piling up. Nanami would stagger through the door at two or three in the morning, his handsome face bloodied and bruised. He never wanted to talk about what had happened on those nights, and she would patch him up and comfort him as best as she could. But even when he was lying beside her in their bed, her husband felt like he was a million miles away.

The work-life boundaries he had been so careful to maintain were crumbling, and Lina was terrified of what would happen when they were completely gone. It was that fear that she was hiding with her anger now.

“Do you even care about me any more? Maybe it would be easier if you could come home to an empty apartment. No one to worry about whether you’re alive or dead.”

Nanami recoiled like he’d been slapped. “Is that how you think I feel?”

“I don’t know!” Lina cried. “That’s the problem, Kento, I never know! You’re always so stoic, so goddamn self-sacrificial, I never know what’s going on in your head. I don’t need you to protect me!”

He stepped closer, reaching for her hands. “I know. I know. But you don’t understand…” Nanami cut himself off with a curse, knowing it was the wrong thing to say.

Lina jerked her hands away from his. “You won’t give me the chance to!” They stared at each other for a long moment, breathing hard. Nanami clenched his fists at his sides, aching to reach out to her but unwilling to try again after she pulled away. Nanami’s phone rang out in the silence, startling them both.

“You have to take that, right?” Lina rolled her eyes.

“No. I don’t. Nothing is more important than this.” Nanami looked pained, but resolutely ignored the call. That is, the first time. As soon as the ringtone cut off, it started back up again. Whoever was on the other line wasn’t giving up. “Please, love, talk to me. I’m listening.” Nanami switched off the ringer and made a show of placing the phone on the coffee table.

Where it promptly started vibrating so hard that it fell to the floor, face-up. Call from: Gojo Satoru.

Lina bit her lip and looked away. “You really do have to take it.”

“I don’t care, okay? Fuck that. I’m clocked out. I want to fix this, Lina, please.”

She bit her lip, tears welling in her eyes. “I feel so selfish.”

“Don’t say that-”

“No, I am. I’m selfish because I know how strong you are, and how much they need you, and I still want to keep you here with me.” Lina’s voice broke. “I know that other people would be hurt if I asked you to give it all up, and I still-” She swallowed a sob and closed the distance between them, pressing her face into his chest. “Kento, I’m still asking.”

Nanami felt the world shudder on its axis. He knew she would never ask that of him if she didn’t mean it, if they hadn’t reached a breaking point. “Lina…”

His phone buzzed again from the floor. This time a contact photo flashed on the screen, a grinning boy with pink hair. In a few seconds Nanami registered the call, how late at night it was, how rarely the kid contacted him directly. Something was wrong. Lina sensed it too, and her face fell as she stepped aside. “Take it.”

“Itadori, what’s wrong?” Nanami pressed the phone to his ear, trying to calm his breathing while keeping his eyes on his wife, who had curled into herself on the couch. “Why are you calling at this time?”

The boy sounded frantic. “Nanamin, Gojo Sensei said he hasn’t been able to reach you! There’s something happening in Shibuya, a curtain-” static crackled over his words, “civilians- need help-”

“Itadori? Itadori I can’t hear you, what’s going on? A curtain was cast in Shibuya?”

Lina’s head snapped up, watching her husband nervously. The call dropped with a dismal beep, and Nanami turned to her. “Lina, you heard everything.” He looked helpless. “Itadori is a child. I have a duty…”

She shook her head, eyes fixed on the floor. “I know, Kento. I know how you feel about those kids, and I love you for it. But I can’t take back what I said.”

He nodded gravely, and crossed the room in two steps to kneel by the couch. He reached for her hands, and this time, she didn’t pull away. “I love you, Lina. I want to give you the life you deserve. I want to give our family that life.”

He brushed away her tears with the back of his hand. “I’m needed in Shibuya. But after that, my love,” his voice shook, the closest he could get to tears in front of her. “My wife. I’ll be all yours. I swear it.”

“I want to believe you,” she whispered. “But there’s always going to be another mission.”

Nanami shook his head firmly. “Not after this. I promise you.” She watched him wordlessly as he strapped on his blunt blade and pressed his glasses to his nose. “Itadori is growing so quickly. He hardly needs me anymore, Lina. Really.” He shrugged on his blazer and she rose to tighten his speckled tie and smooth his lapels like she always did.

“I love you, Kento.”

“I love you too, Lina. More than anything.” She had already turned away when he looked back, halfway out the door.

[flowerandblood]

Wicked prayers, sweet penances (4)

[modern! priest • Aemond x Strong • female]

[warnings: sex content, smut, domination, religious guilt, incest]

[description: Aemond, a deeply religious person, enters the seminary, wanting to fight the thoughts, that have been poisoning his mind for years at the sight of his niece. He returns home as a priest, but the desire he has been running away from returns to him again. A story full of incest, sexual tension and religious guilt.]

Previous and next parts: Masterlist

* English is not my first language. Please, do not repost. Enjoy! *

______

Aemond thought he was now living in a Biblical paradise. He and she were like Adam and Eve, eating the forbidden fruit from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil every day. They both knew that as sinners they would be banished to the earth and cursed, but now, for a while longer, they could savor each other.

He had never been so happy, calm and fulfilled in his life. After their first time, he didn't dare touch her again that night, not wanting to hurt her. They decided, however, that they wanted to sleep naked, and feel the warmth of their bodies next to each other during sleep.

He wrapped his arms around her from behind, burying his nose in her hair, inhaling her wonderful, beloved scent. He hadn't slept so soundly in a long time.

From then on, they made love to each other every night. He had the impression that they were insatiable in this regard and couldn't tear themselves away from each other. They knew that separation awaited them at the end of the road, and they longed to touch and caress each other constantly.

Aemond tried to memorize every inch of her body. Her beautiful, slender arms and long neck, which he always kissed in the morning, immediately after waking up. Her gentle hands that touched him with such tenderness, such devotion. Her long, beautiful hair, which he stroked softly as he cradled her against his chest, after another of their orgasms.

Her full, firm buttocks, which he kissed with reverence when she was still sleeping in bed and he was preparing to leave. Her long, shapely legs, which he stroked as she sat next to him on the couch, reading a book with him. Her soft, sweet breasts that he sucked and caressed with his tongue every night.

Her full, glossy lips that he kissed constantly, even when they were cleaning, preparing dinner, or talking as they lay down. Her big, beautiful, bright eyes that looked at him with a hot, tender feeling that he reciprocated with all of himself.

He realized with horror, alone in the parish office, looking through the papers, that if he could, he would keep her with him forever, as he did now. It seemed to him that they now lived beyond the limits of God's sight and that punishment would never reach them. Deep down, he knew that wasn't true and that he was putting her in danger.

Every afternoon he got around to telling her that they had to end this, that she should go home, erase his number, and try to forget him. But as soon as he crossed the threshold of the parsonage, saw her in the living room, spreading the plates, telling him what she had read or what she had watched, he melted.

He would then approach her, grab her by the nape and pull her brutally to him, kissing her hungrily, interrupting her mid-sentence. Heedless of her moaning about the food getting cold, he would pick her up by the buttocks and take her upstairs. Then he made love to her tenderly, slowly, kissing her whole face with reverence as he experienced fulfillment with her.

He finally thought he couldn't hold back any longer. Over the years, he'd done everything he could to hide himself, not to think about her, but as soon as he saw her, it turned out that any efforts were pointless. He was completely, undyingly in love with her.

He sat early in the morning in the confessional, thinking of her, sitting with his eye closed, the multi-colored sunlight falling on him through the stained-glass windows. It was one of the days when the faithful could come to confession, but practically no one ever showed up. The village was small, a large number of people came on Sunday before the holy mass.

He opened his eye when he heard the creaking sound of a wooden door opening. He heard footsteps towards the confessional and shifted in his seat, mentally preparing himself.

He was surprised to hear that instead of going inside and sitting on the kneeler on the other side, someone knocked on his door. He opened it, frowning, and was shocked to find his niece standing in front of him.

"What are you doing here?" He whispered in horror, staring at her with a beating heart. For some reason, he had the feeling that if anyone saw him looking at her, everything would come out.

She was wearing a black dress with daisies and sneakers. Her front strands of hair were tied back. She looked pretty, girly and fresh as always. She smiled slightly at him, picking up the bundle she had in her bag.

"You said you'd have to stay at the parish office longer today, but you left the salad I made for you on the table." She said, placing the package at his feet.

"I thought I'd take a walk around here. I wanted to see those beautiful stained glass windows you told me about." She spoke lightly and softly.

Aemond pursed his lips and sighed. The momentary pandemonium gave way to admiration at how beautiful she looked in the light falling from the church windows. He thought, that everyone had a right to come to church, and as long as no one saw her enter the vicarage, no one should suspect anything.

He leaned back comfortably against the wooden wall behind him, stroking his chin unhurriedly, watching her movements. She walked up the aisle, looking around, glancing at the representations of saints in beautiful multicolored glass.

The altar itself was small but very nice, mostly wooden, with wonderful carved ornaments. In the very center of it hung a large Baroque painting depicting the Mother of God with the Child. Her footsteps echoed through the church.

She finally turned back, slowly making her way towards him and the exit. She looked at him with a smile, and he felt his cock involuntarily throbbing in his pants. He smirked, the sight of her always made him hot. She walked over to him and held out her hand, which he took and kissed reverently.

"Do you want me to keep you company?" She asked with a smile, looking at him from under her long black eyelashes. "You said that at this time practically no one comes and you sit alone for many hours."

Aemond stared at her intently, stroking her hand gently with his thumb. He felt that he was already completely hard, because of what she had just told him. He wondered if she knew what it sounded like and if she did it on purpose. He tapped his tongue against the side of his cheek, looking at her defiantly.

"How would you want to keep me company, child?" He asked calmly and low, his gaze completely dark. He saw her blush and purse her lips, lowering her gaze. She always did that when she wanted him to take her to bed. She looked so innocent compared to what happened to her afterward, as she lay beneath him, moaning loudly.

"Any way you want it, Father." She whispered softly, looking up at him, ashamed of what she had called him. The sound of this word in his ears made him pull her to him suddenly, so that she fell to his lap, gasping for air. He closed the door behind him with a loud slam, looking at her expectantly.

"So?" He asked casually, looking at her with his head raised. He knew she could feel how hard he was underneath her. He heard her swallow loudly.

"T-tell me what to do, Father." She said softly, they were close together in a very tight space, his scent making her head spin. Aemond smiled dangerously, thinking incredulously that the situation had turned him on ridiculously.

"Lower your dress." He said low. His niece shivered all over, his hands gripping her buttocks tightly. Obediently, she grabbed the straps of her dress and let them down slightly.

"Lower." He said menacingly, squeezing her buttock tightly in his hand. She inhaled deeply, all red, and pulled her straps all the way down so that she was sitting bare-chested in front of him. He looked in adoration at her beautiful, small breasts and pink nipples, sticking out with desire.

"You came to church without a bra underneath? Do you think that's the proper attire for the house of God?" He grunted, taking her breast into his mouth, sucking and licking her nipple.

She moaned softly, trying to muffle any sounds, pressing his face tightly to her chest, entwining her fingers in his blond hair. He slapped her hard on the butt when he didn't hear a response.

"Answer me, child." He hissed, looking at her darkly. His niece swallowed loudly, rubbing involuntarily against the bulge under his cassock.

"N-no, I'm sorry." She mumbled, apparently turned on herself by what was happening to the limit, a drop of sweat gently trickling down her neck. Aemond grunted in satisfaction and licked it off. He slowly undid the buttons of his cassock where his pants had been, and began to undo them.

"I have a suitable penance for you, child." He said, releasing his swollen, throbbing, thick cock from his pants, looking at her expectantly. His free hand slid down her thigh and pushed the fabric of her panties aside.

She rose obediently, trembling all over, impaling herself on him, falling lightly on him and rising again, panting softly, not putting it all the way in.

"Is that what you want, Father?" She asked in a shaky voice as she felt his breathing get louder. He tilted his head back, his eye squeezed shut in pleasure, his lips slightly parted. "Will you give me absolution?"

Aemond pursed his lips, staring at her with eye dark with lust.

"Maybe. It depends on how much repentance you will show." He murmured.

"I regret my sin, Father." She whispered, sinking down on his cock until the very end, both of them gasping loudly at the wonderful sensation. His cock throbbed greedily inside her.

"I regret it very, very much" She moaned softly, riding his cock with each word she spoke and rising up and down, establishing a slow, steady rhythm. Their wet bodies slapped against each other, causing them both to gasp in pleasure.

They both shuddered when they heard the door to the church open. They looked at each other in horror.

"Fuck!" He whispered through clenched teeth, as his niece climbed off him quickly with a loud, wet sound. His cock throbbed all over. He was literally one step away from orgasm.

He ran a hand over his face, as he saw her slide off his lap and kneel in front of him, hiding, so that she couldn't be seen through the bars on the side. They both looked at each other terrified. They couldn't do anything, they heard soft footsteps towards the confessional and someone opened the door on the other side.

Aemond shook his head, burying his face in his hand, disbelieving what was happening. He covered his penis with the material of his cassock, clamping his mouth shut. Someone knelt on the other side, the wood bent under his weight with a loud creak.

"Praised be Lord Jesus Christ." They heard the gentle voice of an elderly woman.

"Now and forever." He answered quietly, his voice trembling slightly. He kept his hand on his face, trying to hide from the woman what was happening to him. He glanced down as he felt his niece lay her head on his lap, looking up at him. He stroked her face gently with his free hand.

"Forgive me, Father for I have sinned. My last confession was one week ago. I have offended God with following sins: I forgot to do the chaplet of divine mercy three times. I cursed twice, I also shouted at my husband." She spoke with a trembling voice, apparently very frightened by the meaning of her sins, fearing for her salvation.

Aemond couldn't keep his mouth from curling into a smile. He thought that such sins were nothing compared to his own. He shivered as he felt his niece start to rise and fall slightly.

He glanced at her out of the corner of his eye, half listening to what the woman was saying to him. His mouth parted in shock when he saw her hand between her thighs.

Her cheek was pressed against his thigh, her mouth was pressed together, and there was a barely audible, wet sound of rubbing against something from below. He felt his cock pound hard again. He parted his lips and revealed his swollen, throbbing cock to her again.

She gave him a hazy look. Her mouth parted as she realized what he wanted. She licked his cock lightly with her tongue, and he tilted his head back, squeezing his eye shut.

"…I can't get my granddaughter to pray with me every day either. I'm afraid for her soul, my daughter is not bringing her up properly…" She spoke, completely lost in her thoughts, not paying too much attention to him.

Aemond covered his face with his hand again, as he felt her slide his cock into her mouth, caressing him gently, unhurriedly, her tongue teasing his tip.

His hand went to her hair, forcing her to shove his dick down her throat. He felt her hand tighten on his thigh and let out a muffled breath, but no sound came out her. She sucked his cock with devotion, the part she couldn't fit she massaged with her hand, the other caressed herself between her thighs.

He stared at the sight with his mouth parted, feeling that his heart was pounding like crazy. He was about to come.

He thought, that what they were doing was wonderful, terrifying, disgusting and beautiful at the same time. Her mouth sped up, tightening on him, sucking on him and licking his cock alternately, massaging him quickly with a soft, wet sound.

He threw his head back, pressing his lips together, holding her hair tightly as he felt his cum gush straight down her throat. She shuddered and sucked in a breath, swallowed silently everything he poured into her, but made no sound. She was falling quickly onto her fingers, apparently having an orgasm herself. He looked at her with a mixture of pride, admiration, and love.

"I firmly resolve, with the help of Your grace, to sin no more and to avoid the near occasion of sin. Amen." He heard at last. He swallowed hard, breathing unevenly.

"As penance, you will pray the rosary three times." It was all he could get out. He lifted his hand from her hair to the bars, making the sign of the cross.

"I absolve you from your sins in the name of the Father, and of the Son, and of the Holy Spirit." He spoke low, his voice trembling slightly.

"Amen." Said the woman.

"Give thanks to the Lord, for He is good." He said solemnly.

"His mercy endures for ever."

______

If you want to be tagged, leave a comment below. ♥

@zenka69 @melsunshine @opheliaas-stuff @chainsawsangel @letmeloveyouuuu

[bluecreates25]

ZOMBIE!GHOST HEADCANNONS ft. GhostSoap

Disclaimer- most of these are not original ideas but a compilation of things I've seen with my own ideas thrown in

So we've all see the theory that he broke his own jaw when he got infected so he wouldn't be able to infect people, right?

which omg is that both painful and hard to do. in addition, in the trailer, it seems like he maintains some of his humanity even after he's infected

WHICH IS DEVASTATING

because basically, I've done too much reading, and I've seen many scenarios

1. is that his group gets infected alongside with him and he remains the sole survivor

eventually, the grief of being alone, and how insanely draining it would be to exist as a rotting corpse, he would essentially shut down/ kill his own mind since he can't actually die.

this is the saddest in my opinion, because I believe he would have insane survivors guilt, and would be absolutely crushed (since in his actual back story his family was murdered, and so this would be the 2nd he's been unable to protect those he cares about)

2. is that he is already long time a zombie, but forms an attachment to some survivor passing through

like someone is passing through the town that he's in, and he immediately forms an attachment to them, but he is conscious enough to realize he would be seen as a threat and even backs up if approached

however, he has a desire to protect that person, so he mostly remains out of sight, watching the area. said person will essentially be protected by him, like he'll literally kill off other zombies to keep them safe

I have such mixed emotions about this, because I feel like he would be so lonely. absolutely infatuated with and determined to protect this person, but he would never allow himself to go near them

3. has to do with John 'Soap' Mactavish

I feel like they'd be with their team when Simon gets bit. the others would try to drag

Soap away or shoot Simon, but Soap isn't having any of that. even Simon would try to get him to leave, but Soap, loyal as ever, would refuse.

Simon would definitely break his jaw in this scenario, but do it while soap goes on a supply run, or is sleeping so he doesn't have to witness it

Simon would eventually give up on begging him to leave, Soap was ready to die with him. once they both realize that Simon is still somewhat conscious, Soap is adamant about taking care of Simon even as he decays, trying to keep him bandaged and cleaned as much as possible

Simon would become like a guard dog for Soap, protecting him from both zombies and other survivors. Simon is especially fast and strong since he still has some control over himself. I think Soap would have to keep a leash on Simon, because Simon's brain, while still holding some function, has zombie instincts, and he easily gets distracted. Also, I think Soap would be able to decipher what Simon's different grunts and groans mean (Simon unable to talk due to broken jaw and rotting) to where they can basically have full conversations

In the end, I think Soap would die of old age (Ghost having protected him his whole life), and we would circle back to Ghost being the sole survivor

OR

Ghost would eventually get to a point where his body has rotted so much that life isn't feasible for him. he can no longer function or protect Soap, and he is able to communicate that with Soap, who in the end shoots him. Soap would be put into absolute agony over this. Soap, being a demolition specialist in the military, makes me personally believe he'd absolutely wreck havoc.

I think he'd probably destroy a city with some makeshift explosives because while Ghost might've been technically dead for a long time, they were still soulmates, and this time, he was gone for good

I think he'd become reckless with his own life, a mix of anger and sadness. There'd be days where he'd be so depressed he wouldn't get up, and others where he'd do the stupidest shit just to not think about the fact he is now completely alone in the apocalypse

I don't think he'd get infected; I think he'd probably pick a fight with some survivor group, or one of his reckless expeditions would be the end of him. I don't even think he'd make it a half year without Simon.

I feel like this would contrast to if he'd stayed with his group after Simon was infected or if Simon had been KIA on a mission (not apocalypse au). I think if he had his team, he would've moved on and lived a good life, although grieving and completely dedicating Simon's death day as a day of remembrance. However, with Simon having been his only companion for so long and the man he threw away everything for, he might as well have died when Simon did

[venmotif]

I was thinking abt kohaku. bc rereading dark nights passing, except in eng they translated it to something stupid like awakened night patrollers. but thats not important

warning: this gets long

kohaku thinks he's a bad person, but he's really not - I actually find his moral compass incredibly strong given the circumstances he was born into and lives with. he's thoughtful and incredibly introspective, so he's done a lot of thinking in order to reconcile with the undeniable fact that what he and his family do is shady and considered immoral by society. and the conclusion that kohaku comes to is incredibly self sacrificing but honestly very noble. he mentions repeatedly that he'd rather have his hands stained, and have to live with the guilt of doing terrible things, if it meant that the greater parts of society could walk with clean consciences. he talks extensively abt how important doing things for the good of society is, even at the expense of the individual; while it can be called unfair that he's been born into circumstances like this that force him to be the one to do dirty things and he can lament that fact, he recognizes it as his duty, and he's dedicated to carrying it out to his utmost in order to protect the people he loves

kohaku recognzies that his actions are terrible, but commits to the ideal that society can be a better, cleaner place at the expense of himself. he mentions dreaming about a day when people like him and madara are no longer needed. kohaku sees himself as disposable, and just a necessary tool for society to use to handle the things no one else wants to touch, and then to be thrown away

when he and madara are collecting information about gfk, madara mentions how ibara always leaves himself an out of any situation, and that kohaku should think about doing the same - if their plan to eliminate gfk failed, he could pin the blame on madara and say madara threatened him. kohaku denies this vehemently.

he understands that his responsibility is undesirable, but he commits to it and does not think, ever, about shirking it in order to save himself. "don't be a fool. don't be like rinne - I never intend to pass my sins on to someone else," he tells madara(ch9). in fact, kohaku seems baffled and probably a bit annoyed in this case(madara loves egging him) that anyone would want to protect him, because he's already dismissed himself as expendable

he mentions madara, rinne and tsukasa as people who are "foolish" enough to care about kohaku's wellbeing, despite knowing what he does. he loves aira and cares about him deeply, and the same is true in reverse, but he tries to keep this part of himself hidden from aira in order to preserve aira's idealism towards idols, since he knows how much aira loves them

kohaku seems to think that if he told aira the truth, aira would no longer love him, for shattering his worldview, but almost certainly aira would care for him all the same - aira already knows what he did as crazy:b, after all, even if afterwards a bunch of blame was shifted around so crazy:b wasn't technically at fault. aira talks to leo while double face are gearing up for their job and expresses concern for kohaku because he mentioned that he had "shady work" and he'd distanced himself from aira shortly after - but after talking to leo, aira comes to the understanding that kohaku's distancing himself in order to protect aira, a person important to him. the funny thing is aira can't believe that kohaku cared about him that much - he thought his deep affection for kohaku only went one way(like an idiot. a loveable one though)

the thing is kohaku cannot fundamentally understand why people would want to care about him as himself, flaws and dirty work and all. he fails to realize that even with his dirty work as a factor, he has an incredibly strong moral character and cares deeply for other people, both generally as a greater society and specifically the people he loves. in fact, because of how he dismisses himself, he dedicates all his energy to improving the world for others, and his self esteem keeps himself from recognizing why other people would want to do the same for him

it's because you're a good person, kohaku. very lovable, murder and all

[deadlymousex01]

Skyrim Characters when you get hurt

Farkas, Brynjolf, Nazier, Aela, Arnbjorn, Lydia

You got hurt on a mission and there were no healing potions readily available (but let's face it if your actually playing skyrim you're usually stocked on those things, also for the sake of this story you don't have a healing spell). Sorry if this is a long one! Hope you enjoy! :)

Farkas

Farkas carefully wraps the bandage around your injuries making sure to not hurt you further. He's trying so hard to focus on helping you feel better but you can tell by the way his brow is scrunched he's more than a little annoyed you went so far into the barrow without him.

He got caught up dealing with some draugr and by the time he finished with them you were gone, so focused on your goal you didn't realize you'd left him behind until you were dealing with three draugr deathlords. You'd managed to keep them all at bay between shouts and your sword, even killing one of them, but they managed to get a few good hits in and if it wasn't for Farkas showing up you might have joined the dead. Once the two of you had finished them off your adrenaline had worn off and the decent cut down your back and side made it impossible to travel further, so instead Farkas got you both into a cleared out room and secured the door for the night so you could rest without risk of attack.

Now he was currently bandaging a cut along your arm and a wave of guilt washed over you. You had first been annoyed by his fussing, reminding him once again you were the dragonborn and perfectly capable of taking care of yourself but seeing his concern and worry made those feelings disappear quickly and be replaced by guilt. Once he finished with your arm he set to work building a small fire in the little pit in the room as you leaned back against the wall watching him.

"I'm sorry Farkas." You say softly. You know he's listening as his hands pause their movements even as he continues to face away from you. "I shouldn't have been so distracted and gotten so far ahead without you. We were warned this barrow was dangerous and I was reckless...I'll try to be more mindful about my surroundings in the future." You see his shoulders rise and fall with a sigh as the fire starts up. He moves to kneel in front of you, worry written all over his face, as he brings a large battle worn hand up to cup your cheek.

"I just want you to be careful, if anything happened to you..." He trailed off, but you knew what he wanted to say. Many think he's just a thickheaded brute but you knew better. Under that all that gruff was a intelligent and caring man. He sighed again looking you in the eyes. "I know you are a capable warrior, the dragonborn, and I don't want to belittle you but...please stay close to me until were out of the place."

You bring one hand up to gently hold his wrist and bring your other to cup his cheek like he's doing to yours with a smile. "I promise, and thank you for saving me, my big strong wolf." He returns your smile with a huff of a laugh before bringing his forehead forward to lightly rest against yours "You're welcome, my ferocious little dragon."

Brynjolf

"Of all the boneheaded, reckless, stupid stunts I've seen what you just pulled has got to be the stupidest one!" Brynjolf's angry whisper tickles your ear as he leans dow to talk to you. The plan was supposed to be simple; He would create a distraction downstairs in the basement of the estate to draw the guards down and then you would sneak in and rob them blind as the owner was supposed to be out for the night and his wife was not home. Well it didn't exactly work like you planned.

Brynjolf had to wait a little longer than expected to get into the estate as the owner was standing in front of the door he needed to get into talking with a guard. Deciding you didn't need a distraction you snuck into the building without him. It was going well in the beginning however you forgot to consider the owners mistress who was visiting her lover for the night. She had been sleeping in the bed and heard you sneaking around in the room over and came to investigate. You had been so busy trying to break into a safe you didn't hear her until it was to late and her dagger stabbed into your shoulder.

Luckily she had terrible aim and in the dark it was even worse so instead of stabbing into your shoulder it missed and ran the blade down the back of your shoulder and back. Your scream of pain and surprise, as well as turning around with your own dagger, caused her to scream in return and start drawing the guards upstairs. You managed to get out the window again and drop to the ground where Brynjolf was still hiding nearby. He knew what was going on the minute he heard the screams and saw the guards run into the house giving the two of you the chance to run.

You didn't get to go to far when the guards started running after you, so Brynjolf had pushed you into a small space between houses and pressed himself up against your back in order to fit himself. The wound on your back ached and burned but the feeling of your lovers body against yours helped distract you from it.

Once the guards had moved off elsewhere he slowly left the space before helping you out as well. Turning you around with his hands he lowered your collar to examine the cut.

"You're lucky your armor protected you from the worst of it, you'll need a couple stitches but you'll be fine." He turned you back to face him as he crossed his arms. "You could of been killed and it would of been because you were being stupid." You knew he was right but that didn't stop the annoyed feeling rising up at his tone.

"Oh like you've never made a bad call during a job."

"Oh plenty love," He said leaning down to be face to face with you with that signature smirk "But I'm clever enough to get away with it." You roll your eyes before turning to walk away. "You're a cocky bastard Bryn." He stops you but grabbing your arm and pushing you back until your trapped between the wall of the house and his body still smirking down at you.

"Aye love, that I am, and you can't resist it."

Nazier

You start to wake with a pounding in your head. As your open your eyes you realize you're back in the sanctuary, laying on one of the beds. You go to lift your arm but a sharp pain prevents you from doing so, instead you turn your head to see Nazier walking up to your bedside, a mug of water in his hand. He sits down in the chair next to your bed and helps you take a few drinks of water before setting it down on the end table and gently taking your uninjured hand.

"How are you feeling? We would of given you a potion but Gabriella said you needed to wake up first or it could do more damage than good." he explained gently running a hand through your hair, careful to avoid any hurt areas.

"I'm sore and hurting all over...how did I get here? Last thing I remember we were hunting down that rouge in the woods." Your head hurts as you try to recall memories that are escaping you. Nazier scooted his chair a little closer so he could lean against the bed.

"Turns out that rouge was a werewolf. The we hadn't any indication of that otherwise we would of been ready for him. You had managed to get close to him but he either smelled you or heard you because he changed quickly and hit you so hard you went flying back into a tree..." He trails off for a moment giving your hand a gentle squeeze. "For a minute after that I thought you were dead."

Your heart ached at the sound of his voice. It was so broken and hurt, like he was truly afraid he had lost you. Of course it could of been true, werewolves are hard to fight when your prepared for them let alone when you aren't. You squeeze his hand back encouraging him to continue.

"I managed to kill him and ran to check on you. You were hurt pretty bad, my healing spells are rusty but I managed to heal you enough to be able to move you and get you back here. Gabriella and Babette got you bandaged up and healed a bit more, but then it's just been waiting for you to wake up. You've been out for two days."

You gently bring your hand up to his cheek and give him a small smile unable to give him the comforting hug you want to. He leans into your touch before leaning down to place a soft kiss to your lips. You knew he must have been extremely worried if he's being so affectionate where the others could see. While the whole family knew the two of you were together, Nazier wasn't one to how it off much.

"Next time you go out I'm going to make extra sure we know everything about the next mark, I'm not going to let you go in blind again." You hum contently feeling safe with him nearby and as he leaves to get the healing potion you close your eyes knowing it will be a while before he lets you out of his sight again.

Aela

You limp toward Whiterun holding your side, the injury wasn't life threatening thankfully as you had been wearing your steel armor but like a idiot you hadn't remembered to bring a healing potion so now you had to endure the long walk back to Jorrvaskr. As you grew closer to the gates you could smell Aela's scent getting closer. Sure enough around the bend she came looking annoyed and worried at the same time.

"I could smell your blood from the gate, how badly are you injured? Why didn't you bring any healing potions?" She asks coming up next to you and lifting your arm to allow her to inspect your injuries. You wince as she does so, the sudden movement pulling at the wound and causing you to flinch.

"I'm fine Aela...ow...I just forgot to get some before I left since I didn't want to lose the silver hands scent. I had the element of surprise and I wasn't going to waste the chance to get 'em." You pull your arm around of her grip and lower it to relieve the strain it was putting on your side. "I had them all nearly taken care of when one pulled a hidden dagger out on me. Just got me by surprise but I'm fine. My armor blocked most of it."

She gives you a firm glare before poking your side causing you to flinch and yell in pain. "You are clearly not fine. Now lets go, don't want you to bleed out in the street." She moves to your good side and drapes your arm around her shoulders so you can lean against her for support. She leads the way through the streets gaining you both a few curious looks before you make it back to the hall. Leading you inside and to your shared room she sits you on the bed and begins to help remove your armor to look at the damage. Even with a healing potion it would need stitched up so she sits on the bed next to you and begins sewing the skin shut giving you the potion to help with the process.

"While I'm all for knocking a few silver hand heads, I wish you would of told me you were leaving to do it. I would of given you back up and probably prevented this from happening." Her quick and nimble hands make easy work of the stitches before she starts wrapping bandages around your chest and waist. "We've already lost two important people to the Companions... and to me ...I really don't want to lose anyone else. So next time, clue me in on your plans so I can make sure you don't kill yourself by accident alright?"

You nod as she finishes with the bandages and helps you lay back on the bed before joining you herself. Snuggled up together you give her a small gentle kiss "I'm sorry for worrying you Aela, I promise to tell you when and where I'm going next time."

"Good, cause if you don't I may be the one stabbing you."

"Wouldn't want it any other way, love."

Arnbjorn

"Arnbjorn, calm down! I'm fine, really, look! See? I'm fine!" This was of course a lie; your left leg was cut up and bleeding, your right arm was just as bad, you were pretty sure your left wrist was broken, and you could be sure you had at least one black eye and a cut lip. In truth you looked like hell however Arnbjorn was one move away from shifting into his werewolf form in a rage and going out and unleashing hell on anyone and everyone, wether they were involved in the bandits that did this or not.

Arnbjorn's chest was heaving so badly from his heavy breathing and growling, and his eyes had almost gone full black in rage you wondered if he was even hearing you or was just lost fighting the beast inside. While you knew he would never hurt you, you didn't want him to hurt one of the family by accident or go on a rampage in Dawnstar and force all of you to move again. You slowly limp toward him, every movement of your leg sending shooting pain up it, until you were close enough to cup his face in your hands.

"Arnbjorn...please...breathe. I know you want to help and the best way for you to do that is calm down so you can help me. Please love, for me." The mission had gone badly. The target had been ready for you and managed to capture you. They had started to torture you in the hopes of finding the rest of your family but you managed to get away and kill your target before you left. Arnbjorn had smelled your blood the moment you walked into the sanctuary and when he saw you, the beast started taking over.

His breathing started to slow down as you held his face and his body began to slowly relax. You watched as his eyes slowly returned to color before he let out a long slow sigh closing his eyes before opening them again. Without a word he immediately scooped you up into his arms and carried you downstairs and into the master bedroom of the sanctuary. He sat on the bed with you in his lap, protectively holding you against his chest as if the bandits were going to show up to finish the job. Babette came in and bandaged your wounds giving you a healing potion for the pain. After she left she shut the door leaving the two of you alone.

Arnbjorn buried his head into your neck deeply breathing in your scent and letting out a low growl. "I will be going out and killing the rest of those bastards." This wasn't a surprise, you knew he would. After losing and being betrayed by Astrid it had taken him so long to be open to the idea of having a mate again and once he did he was even more paranoid; making sure he knew where you were traveling to, who you were talking to, what your plans were, that your weapons were sharp and in the best condition, that your armor was intact. He had loosened up and a lot of these but he had been so hurt by Astrid betrayal you knew this was just what he needed to do to allow himself to be open to you yet still protect himself and you.

He laid you carefully on the bed and then laid next to you allowing you to position yourself against him comfortably without hurting yourseld further. "I know you will, I know you'll always protect me when I need it." He grunted in response before burying his face in your neck again.

"You're not leaving this sanctuary again until your wounds are completely healed...and even then I might not let you." You huff a laugh starting to feel drowsy from everything that had happened the last two days.

"Yes, love."

Lydia

Lydia let out a grunt as she helps slide down the wall to sit on the ground outside of the cave the two of you had just explored. Neither of you had expected the cave to be full of vampires however once you discovered it was you had been determined not to leave until you had cleared it out as it was so close to Morthal.

The two of you had gotten most of them taken care of when a gargoyle popped out and surprised you both. Its claws got a good cut in across both your legs and while you had managed to kill it you were definitely not walking very well by the time you had made it back to the entrance, needing Lydia to help you limp your way out.

"Here my love, rest here while I see if I have a healing potion or bandages." She digs through her bag managing to find a small healing potion and a few rags to cut up for bandages. Offering you the potion she cuts the rags into strips before carefully bandaging your legs.

"You'll need to rest here for a day before you'll be strong enough to reach Morthal. That potion was enough to heal your legs so you don't bleed out but you need to build up some strength. Wait here, I'm going to grab some firewood before it gets dark." When you nod in response she leaves for several minutes before returning with some wood. She sets up the fire before lighting it and then moves toward you. She removes her leg armor and sets it aside to help you lay down with your head in her lap.

"Thank you Lydia, you really were my shield in there. I probably wouldn't be here right now if it wasn't for you." You smile up at her, legs feeling numb from the potion working its magic. She gives you a smile running her fingers through your hair as you close your eyes and let out a sigh of contentment.

"Of course, you're not just my thane, you're my love. I would do anything to protect you, even lay down my own life for yours." You bring a hand up to stroke her cheek and she takes it in hers giving it a soft kiss.

"Let's hope it never comes to that dear, after all, someone needs to go home to the kids."

[scribeforchrist-blog]

Prayerlessness

MEMORY VERSE OF THE WEEK

=========================

+ 2 Chronicles 15:7 But as for you, be strong and do not give up, for your work will be rewarded.”

=========================

VERSE OF THE DAY

+ ROMANS 8:26 Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.

=========================

SUBJECT: Prayerlessness

=========================

** SAY THIS BEFORE YOU READ; HERE’S SOME CHRISTIAN TRUTHS **

I AM CONSTANT IN PRAYER

I AM A WARRIOR

I AM LOVING

I AM CONNECT TO THE VINE

********************************

THOUGHTS:

=======================

 Sometimes, we get to this season where we don’t want to pray; we feel like it’s a chore or a lot to do because we are taking away from our day. Every day, I pray for an hour in the morning, an hour in the afternoon, and 30 minutes or more of silence. I sit and wait for him to speak to me, and I do this every day, whether it’s the weekend or not and sure it takes away from things I want to do, but the point of prayer is to spend time with God and to separate ourselves from other things so we can put him first.

   If we think about it, he put us first when he gave his son to us so that we could have eternal life, so all we have is time to give to him. Still, sometimes, we are prayerless because we feel we won't have time for other things if we pray. Still, my mother taught me early on that if I put God first, he’ll make time for everything I want to do. He indeed does. I study guitar in the evening, and when I get out of the silent prayer with him, I usually have 30 minutes to practice. I’ll rush to get my guitar, and I practice. Sometimes, I can squeeze 30 more minutes in before dinner of video games, but sometimes, if my prayer session lasts longer, I don’t get to do both; in my opinion, when we choose God over all the things we want to do we win spiritually, but sometimes we get into this season where we choice everything over him because we don’t want to stop doing our plans.

  Genesis 3:10 He answered, “I heard you in the garden, and I was afraid because I was naked; so I hid.”

   A lot of times in verses, you'll see Jesus stop and go pray, and he’ll leave everything to do this; you see Daniel go pray three times a day, and you read about Moses going to the mountaintop to talk, see they got away from everything else around them. Still, prayerlessness sometimes happens when we allow guilt or sin to keep us away because we feel that if we go to him, he will shun us, and he doesn’t; he doesn’t do any of that; if we listen carefully, he’ll talk to us about what we did, it's our anxiety that causes us to think he hates us are he's going to rain down brimstone on us, and he isn’t.

   Adam and Eve refused to speak to God; they refused to communicate because they knew what they did was wrong and against what he said, and he never wanted us to be this way with him; he always wanted us to know he heard us when we speak, the bible tells us prayer continuously.

  •1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you.

 

•Romans 12:12: Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, and constantly pray.

 

•Colossians 4:2 Continue steadfastly in prayer, being watchful with thanksgiving.

   In these verses, we see where God is saying talk to me, let me know what you are thinking, tell me about your day, and do it as much as you like; you're not bothering me, and a lot of times, people will tell you that you can talk to them, but then out of nowhere, they are annoyed by you. Still, I can say this: God isn’t like that; he desires for us to communicate, but a lot of times, we lose that momentum because we feel, oh wow, he wants all my time and he doesn’t,

  As we do this, we are dying spiritually, and spiritual drought looks just like a plant that doesn’t get water, just like anything that requires maintenance; when we leave our prayer life like this, we are inviting things to go wrong, and that’s allowing the devil to get in the way the bible tells us to go to our room and shut the door, and that’s so we can have privacy with God. We can do it in secret without our phones, TV, or anything; it is just us and God and our thoughts, and that’s when we bring everything to him.

  Matthew 6:6 But when you pray, go into your room, and shut the door and pray to your Father who is in secret. And your father who sees in secret will reward you.

    ***Today, we learned about praying to God and doing it all the time, and when we don’t, we are killing our relationship with him by ignoring him. Another thing, just in case we forget what to pray for, that is one of the reasons why the Holy Spirit is there to help us in our weakness, and he's there to intercede when we don’t know what to do. Romans 8:26 Likewise the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words.”

   Suppose we ignore him and do other things. In that case, we will come to a place where we are allowing ourselves to do anything, or we get into a rhythm of repeating sins, which we talked about his week; we can't continue to go on in sin, and when we don’t pray we are acceptable to do this why we must keep our selves protected and pray to God so he can show us what we are doing.

  Earlier this week, we talked about Jesus knowing us, and even after we sinned, he knew we would do this sin. Still, when we do, we must go to him and say, Father, I'm sorry, and he will comfort you right where you are; he will hold you close; he loves every side; he even loves the side Adam and Eve was hiding he just wants to show us a better way to respond.

  For the Holy Spirit to teach us and show us, we must go to him and not hide what we are doing; I am so honest when I go to prayer with God. I am so direct and honest in a humble way ,because I don’t want to hide how I am feeling and what I am doing. God just wants to be our friend, our guide, and I hear many people say no, he doesn’t want to be our friend; he does. He's your father and your shepherd, but it’s up to us to go to him and get out of this season of prayerlessness,

©Seer~ Prophetess Lee

========================

PRAYER

========================

Heavenly Father, thank you for today. We ask you to help us to pray to you regardless and not to hide when we do wrong but to help us be strong and come before you and hear your voice. Lord, help us to spend more time with you and to love you more. We want to be on the straight and narrow and spend our life dwelling in you and not in this robotic way but in this authentic way, lord, give us more understanding and more wisdom and knowledge; lord, we give you our life and our situations, lord we ask you to please give us revelation into things we are praying for and hear us when we speak to you, lord we love you and thank you so much for everything. In Jesus' Name Amen

========================

REFERENCES

========================

+ Jeremiah 33:3 Call to me and I will answer you, and will tell you great and hidden things that you have not known.

 

+Matthew 7:7 Ask and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you

 

+ Isaiah 59:1-2 Behold, the Lord's hand is not shortened, that it cannot save, or his ear dull, that it cannot hear; but your iniquities have made a separation between you and your God, and your sins have hidden his face from you so that he does not hear.

========================

FURTHER READINGS

=========================

 Proverbs 22

Micah 5

Exodus 6

Psalm 120

=========================