#guillermo does this to nandor

[darkshrimpemotions]

Which member of your OTP bites the other casually to show affection? Like just chomps on their arm or something like this out of love?

[paperlignes]

WHAT WE DO IN THE SHADOWS (2019-2024) SEASON 6, EPISODE 5: NANDOR'S ARMY

[rel312]

“I wish I had two Guillermos. Then you could have one, I would have one, and then the two Guillermos could become friends or even lovers. Then I could say, like, ‘hey Guillermo, go fuck yourself’ and then he could do that”

Nandor what the fuck????

[nadjasnandor]

the number of times i thought nandermo were about to kiss in that episode. their chemistry is insane.

I think Guillermo thought the same.

[nandermoenthusiast]

The coffin lands with a crash, Nandor already out of it gracefully as his vampiric nature grants him.

“Have you survived the fall Guillermo, are you allright?” he asks haughtily and with a barely concealed predatory grin at the yelping heap of limbs and clothes that is Guillermo right now. Of course he was never truly worried for his well being, Guillermo might be human, but he is no regular human, if his van Helsing blood has anything to say about that. Nandor just likes to tease.

“Yes master, im fine, i just wasnt prepa-“

Nandor offers him a hand out of the coffin, the way Guillermo has done so many times before for him. Nandor looks at him curiously, Guillermo looks all flustered right now, hes cute. Hes always cute of course, but damn. He hasn’t even realised the obvious parallel yet, just took his hand absent-mindedly as he was rambling about something. His hair is all mussed up too. Cute.

Probably the moment registers into Guillermo’s mind as Nandor hears his muttering protests suddenly cut short. He’s looking at their gingerly intertwined hands and kinda looks like hes about to swallow a frog, or maybe like he’s about to start crying again. This fucking guy. Always a theatrics with him. But Nandor has learned to lean into his little guy’s moods. He leaves him to his maybe horny maybe emotional thoughts and finishes helping him out of the coffin.

The air is thick between them now. He can sort of hear Guillermo’s heartbeat from this distance, the little guy probably has a concert thumping in his ears right now. Nandor enjoys playing with his food, always has, and today is no different. He takes a step closer. Guillermo takes an infinitesimal step back. There is a wall very close to his back. Right where Nandor wanted him.

“You know as i was saying about the cameras, Guillermo…” he starts feign-casual as he very not casually hovers over him, black eyes boring into him with the fire that only very rarely comes out in front of the crew. Guillermo looks like he’s a mixture between disbelieving and like he’s gonna pass out from hyperventilation at a moments notice. It’s an endearing mix.

“Y-yes, you -were saying something about your hair…” Guillermo couldn’t physically look away from Nandor if his life depended on it right now.

“And other reasons”, very seriously.

“- Yeah”, an exhale.

Just look at his eager little eyes. Should he put the guy out of his misery? Well come to think of it, should he put himself out of his own misery? He’s been in love with the guy for the better part of a decade now. Of course he’s not about to say that now. Let him play the part of suave vampire for his Guillermo, let him fullfill any fantasy he’s ever had, at the very least this very first time they do this dance. There will be time for the mushy stuff later. Come to think of it, what is Nandor doing?? Acting on years of pent up sexual and romantic tension, of course, but what is he setting himself up to? Heartbreak.

Violent, earth shattering heartbreak. Maybe not today, maybe not in 10 years, but soon. Soon to a vampire anyway. No- you don’t know that. If Guillermo loves me, he might find a way to not leave me like he always does. He always does leave. But then he also always comes back. Doesn’t he? Nandor loses himself in these thoughts for a moment, and Guillermo seems to notice his mind is suddenly somewhere else.

Oh, to be known so completely. Oh, to have a worthy partner, a partner who knows everything about you, a Lazlo to your Nadja, a Charmaine to your Sean, a Sire to your Baron. And to have to lose it in a matter of years. Just his luck. But also like Colin Robinson said, dont be sad cause its over, smile cause it happened.

Nandor’s eyes keep searching Guillermo’s as he draws closer and closer, eyes intensely registering every microexpression on his beloved’s face, the little crinkle between his brows and the small nervous smile that’s forming around his lips. His hands land seamlessly and delicately on either side of Guillermo’s face, and he feels his breath hitch. He really doesn’t give a flying fuck if he’s gonna suffer for a thousand years, Guillermo is here right now and he looks like he’s gonna break under his touch. One hand goes to cradle his head, thumb delicately swiping over Guillermo’s ear and pulse point, as Nandor brings their noses together and they breathe the same air for a moment. The other hand is held gently across his cheek, just there, a reassuring weight. “I’m going to kiss you now”.

And Nandor kisses him.

[jack-fruit]

Alright look. As mad as I am about the constant shipbaiting and the way Nandermo as a whole is treated by the cast and writers/directors, I am willing to look past it. I will be okay with Nandermo as a super special bromance with no sex or kissing or whatever. IF

AND ONLY IF.

They actually have the goddamn BALLS to commit to it. Because Nandor's entire arc revolves around being unhappy and lonely as a vampire. He wants companionship, he wants to be loved, he wants someone he can spend his eternal life with. We can already tell Guillermo fills that role, but I want NANDOR to realize that. I want him to fucking. Tell Guillermo. That he is his person. And it can be as platonic and chaste as the showrunners goddamn please as long as it happens. Because anything less would mean none of the character development Nandor underwent in the past 5 seasons would matter.

I'm already not happy with the direction they're going with making Guillermo human, but I can understand it. Guillermo thought being a vampire would solve all his life problems and make him happy, just like Nandor thought traveling would, thought getting married would, thought ANYTHING he's done would make him truly happy. They are two sides of the same fucked up coin, and their arcs are so inherently tied together that they HAVE to stick together. Because anything less would fall flat.

[imdayyydreaming]

and when nandor practices his confession to the guide on guillermo... what then?

wwdits has followed this structure in a way in season 4, before the wedding when the only real vows exchanged were between nandor and guillermo. so like this isn't unfounded.

it follows that nandor could totally start talking to guillermo like he's the guide but then accidentally slip into painful honesty and not realise until it's too late and then... BAM guillermo knows and the viewers know but nandor will NOT acknowledge it

aaaaaand this is how we can still win

[finngualart]

listen...

[mayaishiipeters]

01x05 // 05x09

they just wanted to hang out :)

[bottombaron]

How do I know Guillermo is a size queen?

Boy heard that the man he dreams about rearranging his insides every night was going to wish for a bigger dick and instead of stopping him or otherwise advising against it (like all his other wishes) he immediately and enthusiasticly committed hours of his life to make sure that it was the 1 wish that came out perfectly

[themarionette-theporcelaindoll]

nandermo may not be happening to YOU but it happened to me

[biracy]

This really IS queer tv

[nadjasnandor]

the guide's comment about nandor's relationship history (ie. he is more about the conquest than the victory) is funny because i don't think it's true at all. the marwa situation was like that for sure, but nandor's other on screen relationships like jen, gail and even freddie showed that nandor very much wants to settle down and he's willing to revolve his life around said relationship. he's said it so himself: he wants what laszlo and nadja have! the problem is that he failed to notice he was settled down for over a decade and now he is losing his little mind trying to recreate that.

[pomidorfriend]

Simms going 'that's his boss!' about the toxic nature of nandermo is the funniest shit. My man, Nandor hasn't paid Guillermo a fucking dime in his life. That's not a boss, that's an Owner. You wanna talk about workplace ethics now?

[incorrectquoteswwdits]

Do I still have to write that essay I promised I would if Nandermo went canon!!?