#guess who has access to a computer again finally :)))

[cod-dump]

Open Door (teen!Ghost au)

———

This wasn’t the conversation he was imagining when Kate called him to talk about the kids. John expected it to be just a talk between friends, not business.

“Boys been doing well?”

“Been doing very well. And Farah has settled nicely.”

“She’s been looking at universities, hasn’t she?”

It started off normal. They were sipping tea in the back garden, enjoying the breeze in the shade. The boys were off at Johnny’s, no doubt causing mayhem. Not that the MacTavishes weren’t experts in chaos, John wasn’t worried about getting a phone call about his boys’ behavior from Mrs. Muriel MacTavish.

“I’ve been talking with the Shadow’s CO.”

John bristled at the mention of the mercenary. He looked at Kate, questioning why she would even bring him up when they were talking about their families.

“As you know, he’s become Gary’s full time guardian.”

“But?”

“But… he’s not quite… ready to handle a kid. Especially not one as young as Gary, or as traumatized.”

He didn’t like where this was going.

“He accepted being the kid’s guardian without being ready to take care of him when the need arises?”

“John, he didn’t expect to lose men coming here. With our operation, and, hell, even Nik’s, not it’s not a dangerous place.”

John could hear the unspoken words on the tip of her tongue.

“It’s- This isn’t my area of expertise-“

“Kate, just say it.”

Kate swallows, “Can you take in Gary? At least help care for him until Phillip can take him?”

John lets out a deep breath, there it was. He sets down his cup of tea and leans back, covering his eyes. Kate continued talking.

“After Simon’s transformation I have no higher recommendation for Gary’s care.”

“I have a dog, a cat, a fucking pigeon, three kids, and a Nik in my house.”

“You have the room. Plus Phillip will pay you for all of Gary’s needs and then some. He wants to come over as often as possible, too, to help in any way he can with him.”

John takes a breath before his uncovers his eyes and looks at Kate.

“You really can’t take him?”

“Annie is already doing twelve hour shifts and I’m running the office and helping Alex with his physical therapy and running him to his extracurricular activities. Like I said, after Simon? I no one else more capable that I trust to do this.”

“Oh fuck me- Fine! How much is he willing to pay?”

“£5’000 a month.”

John chokes as he sits up, “You’re joking-“

“No, sir. From my understanding, Phillip Graves is a very wealthy man and he doesn’t half ass anything.”

“Fuck… lead with the money, damn.”

Kate snorted, "Didn't take you as a greedy man, John."

John rolls his eyes, was he really agreeing to this? He wasn't doing as many 'jobs' as of late, mostly running to the office every month and doing surveillance of the town. Compared to how his life was years ago before Simon, he has a lot of free time. But he wasn't sure he was prepared to possible have another Simon in the home.

The hours that went into loving him and helping him get on his feet was worth it but... John wasn't sure he had another decade of that left.

"I'll send you Phillip's contact information so you two can start coming up with an agreement."

"I'm really doing this..."

"I'm not forcing you."

John glared and Kate rolled her eyes before continuing.

"I'm not forcing, just heavily persuading you."

"Forcing."

"Fine, forcing. This could give us a good in with Shadow CO. Besides, I forced you to care for Simon. Of course I dropped Kyle off at your door a few years after that. Do you regret that?

John didn't even have to think about it, "Never."

"Then give the poor kid a chance. I know you'll love him."

"That's what I'm afraid of."

The door opened and Annie called out.

"We're home! Hide the bank blueprints!"

John couldn't help but snort as Kate grinned and stood. She left into the kitchen to greet her wife and kid, giving John an opportunity to escape before he agrees to something else he's not entirely sure about. As he walked into the hall, he caught a glimpse of Alex darting down the hall to his room. Annie was having her coat taken from her by Kate, the woman having that same smitten look she had the day she met her.

Annie spotted John and grinned, "Hey, stranger. Feel like you've been avoiding me."

"You? Never. Her? I try."

Kate gave him a playful glare, "Leaving?"

"If I stay out too long Nik starts getting anxious. And with my boys it's infectious."

Annie gives an understanding nods, "Better not keep him waiting then. Oh! And before you go-"

Annie stepped away from Kate to grab a book from the shelf nearby. She handed it over and John immediately recognized it as a science workbook, "Kyle left this here the other day. I was going to have Alex give it to him at school Monday but he won't be there."

John fought the amused grin that tried to show itself. There was something so inherently sweet about Alex and Kyle's budding relationship.

"I'll make sure he gets it."

John managed to make it outside to his car before Kate stopped him.

"John-"

"I'm going to talk to Nik about it tonight, and you know he can't turn away a stray."

"You won't be able to back out then."

"Exactly why I have to tell him."

Kate smiled, "Tell him if you take in another kid that he has to stop trying to catch one of the neighborhood raccoons."

John laughed out loudly, "Oh, you know that won't happen."

They said tonight and John pulled out of the driveway, preparing himself for what was ahead of him. He thought back to when Simon was first brought home. He wasn't supposed to stay long but three weeks in John was ready to fight the world for him. Simon coming into his life was a blessing, Nik came along and apparently they were a package deal, and them being in his life opened the door to Kyle and then Farah.

He wasn't going to turn away Gary, and he wasn't going to turn away the man who was seemingly determined to do right by the kid. It was the right thing to do, reaching out for help, and John could overlook the fact that the man was a foreign mercenary for the sake of the child. John was hoping, even praying, that this wouldn't lead to anything. But considering what taking in Simon lead him to, he was too curious, maybe even eager, to see what else was brought into his life.

[babybatscreationsv2]

Cooling Metal

Marvel | Starker

Tony has been racing professionally for years, but the spark just isn't there anymore. When Tony catches sight of a street race happening he finds himself burning with adrenaline like he hasn't in years. Though he finds it hard to believe that a pretty boy like Peter really is the best street racer around.

Rating: Explicit

For my beautiful H <3

Warnings and tags: Racing au, praise kink, breeding kink, rough sex, hair pulling, rimming, cum play

Another race, another third place 'victory'. The tabloids were laughing at him. Saying he was past his prime, his reflexes were shot, he was washed up. Tony was afraid they were right. In fact, he was afraid of who he wasn't when he wasn't behind the wheel. Racing was all he'd known for so long. It was all he knew anymore.

That must have been what led him here. He'd been drawn in by the sound of engines revving. Then he'd followed the laughter and the bright lights. A long row of modded out cars blocked off the street. They looked like a rainbow. LEDs glowed in every color against the pavement. The cars were painted to match. Most of them were printed with noisy, eye-catching, decals.

Tony had never joined in any street races. He'd never needed to. His parents made sure he always had access to a track. This was something completely new to him. And it made his heart pound.

He parked his car on the street, out of their way and stepped out. The road began to rumble as the drivers started revving again. The noise of the crowd was drowned out by the engines. The shadow of a lithe figure passed across the headlights. They took their place in the center of the four cars, almost dancing their way along. Then they dropped a flag and the cars took off.

Adrenaline burned through him as they blurred past, sucking the air from the street as they went. Tony watched them go, a grin plastered to his face. He felt drunk just at the sight of it.

His ears followed the sound as they wrapped around the block. The crowd began screaming, waving, cheering. A car, neon green, came rocketing around the corner and finally slid to a stop just past the starting line. The next two were mere seconds too slow with the fourth and final coming up behind.

The drivers stepped out of their cars. The loser was ignored except for one woman who jogged over to give a man a consolation kiss. The winner was laughing, pouring beer over his face, screaming in victory in the center of a cheering crowd. Tony laughed along with them.

"You a cop?" A voice made him jump. Beside him now was a young man with too big eyes and not enough clothes. He'd cut his tank top off at the chest and his low rise shorts were barely long enough to cover whatever he was packing down there. He started at him curiously with his lips wrapped around a lollipop.

"Uh," Tony cleared his throat. "Just a spectator."

He pulled the candy from his mouth and let it pop between his lips. It was bubblegum pink and big to the point of being vulgar.

"We don't usually allow uninvited guests. But I know who you are," he said. "Just as long as you're not gonna cause any problems."

Tony held his hands. "No problems. Just uh... bored I guess."

"Right." The boy smiled. "We won't have much longer before we have to clear out, but feel free to mingle, Mr. Stark."

"Sure. Thanks, kid." The boy scoffed as he walked away. He joined up with a group that was chatting around a souped up Dodge Charger. With nowhere else to go, Tony followed after him.

No one seemed to recognize him or maybe they just didn't care. It was a blow to his ego, but it was also kind of refreshing. He took a spot where he could check out under the hood. He let out a soft whistle as his eyes roamed over the components.

"Nice huh?" The man beside him. He was a lot younger than Tony with a round face and a childish smile.

"Gorgeous. You put this together?"

"Nah," he shrugged. "I'm more of a computer guy. This is Peter's car. He's kind of the best of us around here, but he took the night off from racing. His aunt's been getting on him and- I uh, I guess that's personal." He blushed. "But hey, it really worked out for Bucky tonight. I don't think he's ever beaten Peter before which more or less means, he hasn't won in a decade."

They looked at the man now soaked with beer. He was making out with another man while a small and very drunk crowd stood around chatting and laughing.

"I'm Ned," he offered his hand. Tony shook it.

"Tony."

The boy laughed. "Yeah, I know. We're all pretty surprised you're here. Some of the other more legit racers show up sometimes, but no one's ever seen you around before. You havin' a midlife crisis or something?"

Tony paled. "No- uh, what makes you say that?"

Ned laughed. "I'm just messing with you. I'm sure you've done all kinds of street racing before. Guy like you. You're the best of the best, Mr. Stark."

"Yeah..."

The boy with the pretty eyes and the lack of clothes made his way over to the car. He smiled at Tony. "What do you think?"

"It's a nice car," Tony said.

"Thanks. I built it myself."

Tony laughed. "Sure, kid."

The other two started laughing. A bit hysterically even. Tony stood there, bewildered by whatever joke he wasn't in on.

"Tony," Ned sucked in a breath. "This is Peter. The guy I was telling you about."

Tony raised his eyebrows. "You're Peter? This is your car?"

"Yep." He grinned.

Tony looked at them both. "You're fucking with me."

Peter rolled his eyes and slammed the hood shut. "What would you know? You're seven flavors of washed up, Mr. Stark."

Tony glared at the back of his head. The hostility brewing in his gut didn't lessen when the boy turned and leaned against the hood.

"I am far from washed up."

"Really?" The boy reached into his back pocket and somehow retrieved a cell phone. He unlocked it and handed it over on the contact screen.

"Is this your idea of flirting, kid? Because I have to say it needs some work."

Peter rolled his eyes. "Just put your number in. I'll text you tomorrow. Then you can show me how not washed up you are."

"I don't have anything to prove to you," he said even as he typed his information in.

"No? Well I have something to prove." Peter stood and took his phone back. He was too close. His eyes were staring straight into the back of his own. Tony could hear his heart beat in his ears. Peter took a step back and sauntered around the car. He held his eye all the way until the door was shut. Tony barely noticed Ned climbing in the other side.

Sirens barely a block over made him jump. Everyone ran. Tony jogged back to his car and pulled onto the street, inching his way through the crowd. He barely made it out before the area was surrounded.

He had a few days off which should have been spent getting trashed at a party he said he wasn't going to, but instead he stayed in. He kept his phone within arms reach, jolting at every notification. The TV did little to distract him. Neither did anything else. His mind kept wandering back to candy coated lips and a determined scowl. The boy was cute. Interesting, too.

When the text finally came, Tony was ready. More than ready, he was pumped. It was hard to rein himself in to keep from running out the door early. Somehow, despite the adrenaline, he showed up at the spot just as everyone else did.

It was on the edge of the city where the roads became winding. The streets were lit only by headlights and LEDs. There were no street lamps or billboards here.

Cars were parked in the grass, but their drivers stood at the edge of the street. They watched as Tony pulled up next to the only car left in the road, Peter's Charger.

The window rolled down and Peter grinned at him from behind the wheel.

“I hope you remembered to stretch,” he teased.

“Is this a friendly race or should I have brought cash?” Tony called back.

Peter laughed. “I wouldn't want to rob an old man.”

Someone off the road called to Peter and he turned and nodded to them. Some girl Tony hadn't looked twice at stepped out between the headlights. Tony's hands adjusted on the wheel. He turned his gaze to the darkening road ahead.

The flag was dropped and they darted forward. Buildings overgrown and unkempt blurred past with increasing speed. Adrenaline burned under Tony's skin. A euphoric laugh burst from his chest.

He glanced at Peter beside him, nearly neck and neck. Even over the bumpy, cracked, streets the kid knew what he was doing. Then they hit a corner. Tony had never raced on roads that weren't paved smooth. All it took was a pothole to throw him off just enough for Peter to cut him off, drifting around the curve and leaving Tony behind. He wasn't ahead by much, but it was enough.

A small group of cars at the end of the street marked the end of the race. They sat in darkness until they spotted Peter coming around. Lights flicked on, hands waved from the windows. Tony was sure they were cheering.

No one cheered for him like that anymore.

He didn't win races anymore.

They both slid to a stop, Peter much more gracefully. They stepped out of their cars to cheering. A couple of hands clapped him on the back, but Tony only had eyes for the victor.

"Alright. You beat me, kid." Tony offered his hand and Peter shook it firmly.

He smiled sweetly, his pretty eyes aglow. "Don't take it too hard, old man."

Something bitter died on his tongue as his embarrassment faded. His eyes drifted over Peter's cocked hip, the crotch of his shorts that bulged just enough to be visible, his soft thighs that were begging to be touched. But more importantly, there was something in that tone that scratched at an entirely different sort of beast. Maybe it was stupid, but he wanted Peter's approval. Tony's slip stretched into a grin.

"I have something that will impress you."

"What's that?" Peter crossed his arms over his chest. That amused little smile on his lips made Tony's fingers twitch.

"Something even the king of New York's streets has never seen." Tony turned away and walked back to his car. He opened the door and looked at Peter. "Coming?"

He silently debated it for a moment. Tony considered just how much that sluttly little outfit and those pouting lips hid how just how smart he truly was.

"Peter!" Ned called from the group. "We gotta move!"

Peter looked at his friend with the slightest hint of anxiety as his decision hit a swift deadline. He grabbed his keys and tossed them. "Take my baby home. I'll see you later." Ned looked at them both, then sirens pricked their ears.

"You got it." He jogged over and slid into the driver's seat of Peter's car. Everyone scrambled.

Peter hopped into Tony's car and he slammed on the gas. They blew past city streets until the sound of sirens was far behind, then they slowed down and blended into the other traffic.

"Is it always like that?" Tony asked.

Peter laughed. Tony could see the adrenaline in his eyes. "Not every night, but pretty often. Someone eventually rats us out or the noise gives us away. Where are we going?"

"You'll see."

"You're not planning to drop me off a pier or anything right? Because Ned has my location and literally everyone knows where you live."

"Well if that's the case, you should know where we're going."

Peter looked at where they were and it seemed to click. "Aren't you gonna buy me dinner first?"

"That's a little presumptuous."

"I'm presumptuous? You didn't get the wrong idea about the little shorts did you? Everyone does."

"I'm sure you only dress like a whore."

Peter scoffed. "I'm not the paid kind anyway."

"That's too bad. You'd make a fortune."

Peter laughed. "I kind of already do."

"Oh yeah? You got some fancy condo around here?"

"Nah. My family has a lot of debt to pay off." Peter shrugged and looked out the window.

"Ned mentioned you had an aunt," Tony said gently. He could sense the tension coming off of him, but he was curious nonetheless.

"I don't wanna talk about that stuff."

"You got it, kid." He let it go, curiosity paused for now. But he would be lying if he said he didn't want to know every bit of Peter's story.

They reached the bottom of Stark Tower. The gate raised as the sensor recognized Tony's car and let them into the garage. The entry twisted around, up a dimly lit path.

"Fancy," Peter commented. Tony only smiled.

They turned the last corner and the walls opened up into the garage. Two rows of cars took up half the space with room in the center for the auto shop.

"Whoa..." Peter stared wide eyed at the room. "Wait, this is all yours? Just yours?"

"Yep. All mine. I built most of these. That one was a gift from Audi though, prototype. Never hit the streets."

"Holy shit."

Tony grinned. He parked the car in its spot and cut it off. He looked at Peter who smiled and jumped right out the door. His eyes were glittering. His smile lit up the room.

"Impressed yet?"

Peter laughed gently. "Don't tell me I got under your skin."

"Seems like you intended to."

"Maybe, but I figured you had thicker skin," Peter teased.

"Maybe I care what you think." It was a little honest, but Peter didn't laugh. He turned towards him, uninterested now in the cars. Tension thrummed between them.

"Why's that?" he said in a quiet voice. He drifted slowly toward him in small steps.

"I've been alive a long time," Tony laughed softly, humorlessly. "And somehow I've never been more alive than I am right now."

Peter gave the smallest nod, but it didn't even seem intended for him. More like he was answering his own question. He reached him, warm hands finding his chest. It snapped the tension like a rubber band.

Tony's hands wrapped around him, pulling him in chest to chest, pressing their mouths together. Peter made a little noise in surprise, but he melted against him. Tony's hands slid over his back to squeeze his ass and pull his hips against him. While Peter's hands slid down and found their way under Tony's shirt.

"You don't-" Peter started, struggling to pull his lips away. "You don't actually think I'm just slut do you?"

"I don't bring random sluts in here. I have a different garage for that."

Peter rolled his eyes. "Well then," he extracted himself from Tony's arms and backed away with a sly grin. He made his way back to the car and leaned against the cooling hood. "This seems like a good spot."

Tony licked his lips and followed after him. He grabbed Peter's thighs and lifted him off the ground, stepping between his spread legs. Peter gasped and reached for him. Tony leaned down into his hands and let Peter pull him in, kissing him slowly and deeply, to the rhythm of their hips grinding together. Peter whimpered. Tony could feel the way his cheeks heated in embarrassment. He gave him a soft moan in answer that had Peter pulling him in closer. But Tony was done with kissing.

His hand wrapped around Peter's neck and he pushed him down against the hood. With one hand he worked open Peter's shorts. Peter helped him shove them down, leaving them hanging off of one ankle along with his underwear. He let Tony manhandle him, flipping him onto his stomach and pulling his knees up onto the car.

Tony pressed kisses into his lower back, working his way down, until he found his hole.

"Tony," Peter gasped. His hands grabbed at the warm metal, but there was nothing but Tony's hands on his thighs to hold him up. He laid against the hood, moaning against the surface while Tony ate him out.

"Tony, fuck," Peter whined. Tony kept going, encouraged by the boy's noises until he needed more. He laid him down again against the hood only to turn him over on his belly.

Tony grabbed a fistful of his soft hair and pulled his head up. "Are you ready for me, baby?" He smirked at Peter's glassy eyes and slack lips.

"Uh huh," the boy whined.

"Tell me." Tony pressed his hips against Peter's ass. He watched his face as he tried to recover enough thought to speak.

"Fuck me, please," he breathed. His eyes finally focused on Tony's face.

"Good boy." Tony held Peter's hair in one hand and his own cock in the other, watching him as he forced himself inside him. Peter gasped, his mouth hung open, his eyes squeezed shut and a keening whine fell from his lips as Tony kept pushing in deeper.

"Fuck, you feel so good, baby," Tony groaned. Peter pushed back against him, moaning. His strong back arched. His hands pushed against the metal.

"Fuck me, Tony," he demanded. "Fucking breed me."

"Yeah? You want my cum, baby?"

"Please," Peter moaned.

Tony leaned over him, pressing kisses across his shoulders. He rocked his hips, fast but deep, enjoying that tight heat down the length of his dick. He wrapped a hand around Peter's cock, stroking him just as fast, listening to his voice pitch higher as he whined.

"So close," Peter gasped. "Please- please!"

"What do you need, baby?"

"Cum in me, please. I wanna feel it."

Tony moaned. "You got it, sweetheart." He pushed him down against the hood with a hand between his shoulders that slid down to hold the back of his neck. He was selfish now, fucking him how he wanted, but Peter only seemed to love it. He panted against the hood of the car, breath ghosting against the surface. Quiet pleas fell from his lips.

"You want it, baby?" Tony growled.

"Please, Tony," Peter begged.

"Gonna fucking breed you just like you wanted."

Peter whined. He slid against the warm metal as Tony pushed himself in deep and came inside him. Peter shivered beneath him. His hand slipped down to stroke his cock and before Tony had even recovered, Peter was cumming all over the hood.

Tony turned him over, moving him out of the mess. He kissed him, holding where his weight wanted to melt into the floor. Peter clung to his arms, breathing heavily and then finally slowing. He grinned.

"Sorry about the mess," Peter said with a soft laugh.

"You could always put those little shorts back on and make it up to me with a car wash." Tony wagged his eyebrows.

"I can do better than that."

"How's that?"

Peter slipped from his arms and bent over the hood. He met Tony's eye and held his gaze as he ran his tongue over the metal, licking his own cum from the surface.

"You tryin' to get fucked again?"

"I was hoping we could try out the backseat.”

[pregnant-sissy-abdl]

The wife who sews dresses (and makes me do stuff...)

I previously wrote on my blog (see this entry) about my problem with sissy dresses. More specifically, my wife humiliates me by sewing me new and new sissy dresses, and forces me to wear them.

The problem has escalated since the last post. My wife is no longer satisfied with me just hanging out in a sissy dress at our house while she is at work. Now she makes me do various "sissy chores" that I have to complete during the day. The motivation is often, for example, that completing a chore opens a remote-controlled lock, after which I can finally push a HUGE anal plug out of my boi-pussy.

My wife has a degree in computer science and she works in the development of artificial intelligence applications. She has installed cameras at home and connected them to a computer running an application she developed (and which I do not have access to!). Every day, the application tells me the task for that day. For example "make a perfect sissy pose", which would require me to put on some serious make-up, a wig, high-heel shoes, silicone breast inserts and then spend hours and hours trying to make that perfect pose to a camera. The artificial intelligence part then continuously evaluates my poses and releases the wifi locks in my dress or chastity belt only if and when my pose is perfect. Cameras in the house of course record everything, and I believe she is earning some money from an online fan site (at least once she said to me: "you are getting more popular!", without explaining it further...)

This is a photo of me yesterday trying to "do a bimbo sissy pose":

Sometimes the tasks are more sexual in nature, for example "give a perfect sissy blowjob to a penis-shaped dildo". Then I could end up doing hours and hours sucking a penis-shaped dildo in front of a camera. Or even worse, "give yourself a real sissygasm", which is a task I haven't been able to complete yet. I have tried faking sissygasms, but the artificial intelligence can't be fooled, I guess.

Could I just refuse to wear her dresses and sissy chores? I could, but she has stored tens of hours of perverted videos and photos of me now, so she could ruin my life for good, did she ever want to revenge on me...

Once again I ask, dear Tumblr, what should I do?

[thursdayisbetterthanfriday]

Cybernetics with Chinese Characteristics & why we suck at the real Grand Strategy Game

Part 2 - The Quickening

Back in 2023, I wrote this more blog-like post about the mid 20th century McCarthyite purges of the Jet Propulsion Laboratory and the knock on effects that had - Namely the inception of the Chinese nuclear program, one-child policy and Chinese computing scene.

Since nothing is new under the sun, we have recently witnessed yet another example of America shooting itself in the foot, yet again, due to it's McCarthyite style purge of Chinese technology.

The release of the Chinese created AI system DeepSeek R1 last week has lead to the largest US stock market loss in history with NVIDIA stock decimated.

A record $465 Billion was wiped off its valuation in a single day. In 2024, the government of Turkey spent this much in a year on it's responsibilities?

Why did this happen?

As always, a lot can be put down to US foreign policy, and the in-intended implications of seemingly positive actions.

Do you want to start a trade war?

Back in the relatively uncontroversial days of the first Trump Presidency (Yes it does feel odd saying that) there were scandals with hardware provided by Chinese company Huawei. This led to the  National Defense Authorization Act for Fiscal Year 2019 which explicitly banned Huawei and ZTE's hardware from use in US Government institutions. It also meant the US had to authorise US component manufacturer purchases by these companies.

Crucially this had a 27 month window. This allowed both companies to switch suppliers, and production to domestic suppliers. This actually led to Chinese chip advances. Following on from this came the 2022 move by the US Department of Commerce: "Commerce Implements New Export Controls on Advanced Computing and Semiconductor Manufacturing Items to the People’s Republic of China (PRC) ". This further limited the supply of semiconductor, supercomputer, and similar hardware to the PRC and associated countries.

Ok, well so far this is fairly dry stuff. You might think it would hamper Chinese development and, to some extent, it did.

It also proved to be the main catalyst for one financial quant.

Meet the Quant

Meet Liang Wenfeng (梁文锋). Educated to masters level, Liang was keen to apply machine learning methods to various field, but couldn't get a break. Finally, in the mid 2000's, he settled on a career investigating quantitative trading using machine learning techniques.

He became successful, founding several trading firms based around using machine learning methods, but his interest in base AI never seemed to cease. It was in 2021 that he started purchasing multiple NVIDIA GPUs to create a side project, leading to the creation of DeepSeek in 2023.

Now, due to import limitations, there were limitations on computation. This, however, did not stop DeepSeek's programming team.

Instead they used it as their strength.

Constrains Breed Innovation

For many years, the Western model of AI releases have focussed on making ever larger and larger models.

Why?

Let's break this down from an evolutionary point of view. Modern Western technology companies are largely monopolistic and monolithic. Many of these companies have previously hired staff at higher salaries not to fill roles, but to deny their competitors, and middle market firms, high-flying staff.

They also closely guard trade secrets. What's the training data? What algorithms were used in construction? Guess you'd better chat up some Silicon Valley bros at parties to find out.

For these kinds of firms, having control over large models, housed in data centres makes perfect sense. Controlling model deployment on their own computing systems, and not using local machines, means that they can not only control their systems more carefully, it also means that they can gatekeep access.

If your business model is to allow people to access your models on your servers, and your employees are focussed on making the biggest, best, models, there is no impetus to innovate more efficient, smaller models.

Companies such as OpenAI therefore have the following traits:

Research/Model focus on size over efficiency

Profit driven culture, with emphasis on closed source code

OpenAI's initial focus was as a non-for-profit developing Artificial General Intelligence. This became a for-profit driven company over time. - “I personally chose the price and thought we would make some money.” - Sam Altman

Staff working within paradigm they set in the early 2020's with established code libraries and direct contact with hardware companies creating chips

Significant capital investment - Upwards of several $ billions

DeepSeek, in comparison, is slightly different

For DeepSeek, necessity made innovation necessary. In order to create similar, or better models, than their counterparts, they needed to significantly optimise their code. This requires significantly more work to create, and write, libraries compared to OpenAI.

DeepSeek was started by financial quants, with backgrounds in mainly mathematics and AI. With a focus on mathematics and research, the main drive of many in the company has been exploration of the research space over concerns about profitability.

DeepSeek has also done what OpenAI stopped years ago: actually releasing the code and data for their models. Not only can these models therefore be run via their own gated servers, anyone can replicate their work and make their own system.

For DeepSeek, their traits were:

Research/Model focus on both efficiency and accuracy

Research driven culture, with open nature - “Basic science research rarely offers high returns on investment” - Liang Wenfeng

Strong mathematical background of staff, with ability to work around software, and hardware, constraints

Low capital investment of around $5.5 million

From an evolutionary point of view, DeepSeek's traits have outcompeted those of OpenAI.

More efficient models cost less to run. They also more portable to local machines.

The strong ability of DeepSeek's research focussed staff allowed them to innovate around hardware constraints

Opening up the code to everyone allows anyone (still with the right hardware) to make their own version.

To top it off, the cost to make, and run, DeepSeek R1 is a fraction of the cost of OpenAI's model

House of Cards

Now we can return to today. NVIDIA has lost significant market value. It's not just limited to NVIDIA, but to the entire US technology sector with the most AI adjacent companies losing from 10% to 30% of their valuation in a single day.

The culture, and business model, of OpenAI isn't just limited to OpenAI, but to the entire US technology ecosystem. The US model has been to create rentier-style financial instruments at sky-high valuations.

US tech stocks have been one of the only success stories for America over the past few decades, ever since the offshoring of many manufacturing industries. Like a lost long-unemployed Detroit auto-worker the US has been mainlining technology like Fentanyl, ignoring the anti-trust doctors advice, injecting pure deregulated substances into its veins.

The new AI boom? A new stronger hit, ready for Wall Street, and Private Equity to tie the tourniquet around its arm and pump it right into the arteries.

Like Prometheus, DeepSeek has delved deep and retrieved fire from the algorithmic gods, and shown it's creation to the world. The stock market is on fire, as the traders are coming off of their high, realising they still live in the ruin of barren, decrepit, warehouses and manufactories. The corporate heads, and company leaders reigning over the wreckage like feudal lords, collecting tithes from the serfs working their domain.

A Tale of Two Cities

The rise of DeepSeek isn't just a one-off story of derring-do in the AI world: It's a symbolic representation of the changing world order. DeepSeek is but one company among many who are outcompeting the US, and the world, in innovation.

Where once US free-markets led the world in manufacturing, technology and military capability, now the US is a country devoid of coherent state regulated free-market principles - its place as the singular world power decimated by destroying the very systems which made it great.

"Our merchants and master-manufacturers complain much of the bad effects of high wages in raising the price, and thereby lessening the sale of their goods both at home and abroad. They say nothing concerning the bad effects of high profits. They are silent with regard to the pernicious effects of their own gains. They complain only of those of other people." - Adam Smith, The Wealth of Nations

By selling the jobs of working class communities to overseas businesses, destroying unions and creating rentier based business models without significant anti-trust measures, US business and political elites have sealed the present fate of the country.

The CCP led, but strongly anti-trust enforcing, China has been able to innovate, ironically, using the free-market principles of Adam Smith to rise up and create some of the world's best innovations. The factories, opened by Western business leaders to avoid union/worker labour costs in their own countries, have led Shenzhen, and similar cities, to become hubs of technological innovation - compounding their ability to determine the future of technologies across the world.

Will America be able to regain its position on top? It's too early to say, but the innovative, talented, people who made America in the 20th century can certainly do it again.

As Franklin D. Roosevelt once said: “The liberty of a democracy is not safe if the people tolerated the growth of private power to a point where it becomes stronger than the democratic state itself...

We know now that Government by organized money is just as dangerous as Government by organized mob.

Never before in all our history have these forces been so united against one candidate as they stand today. They are unanimous in their hate for me—and I welcome their hatred.”

Until then, here's a farewell to the American Century 在那之前, 再见美国世纪

[miimo96]

Thoughts on My Adventures with Superman S2 episode 9

So you're probably wondering what heck took so long for me to make this, and well ya see thats because I actually had to wait for this episode to come out on the website where I watch all my TV shows and anime on, and since That was taking so long to be released, I wasn't able to watch this and thus give my review on it, But now that it has officially come out I can finally Get my thoughts out there and Share it with you all, anyway that's mainly because why I've been gone for so long, that because depression kicks in at the most random times in my life and so I wasn't feeling motivated, but aside from that I'm finally ready to get this done and thus give you my review, anyway yeah Sorry for the wait but let's get into it^^;

______________________________________

Starting off I actually wanna talk about a few things regarding this opening, mainly about Clark's kindness; I love the fact that even tho this is a world where didn't never up and thus he never became Superman, he still has that kindness within him, and from the way he talks about wanting to help the creature and show him that it's not Alone, just shows that No matter what reality it is, he will always be compassionate and thus want to help people, hence what makes him Superman in the 1st place; also I didn't expect that in this episode we were actually going to be seeing an Evil version of his parents, because it's always usually just him getting the world he always wanted, I actually like that they took a different approach this time and thus gave us a reality, where he still has his parents, and where he basically got to grow up on krypton as a completely different person, also it's really interesting to see that in this version, the Black Mercy is more or less giving him a dream world where he basically has no control over, and Is kinda just gaslighting him like Brainiac would, I think that's because in this version, the black Mercy isn't a plant like most irritations, but is rather just a piece of technology, and since Brainiac was the computer system for krypton, he is able to access all the technology created from krypton, hence why Clark's mother Laura was talking to him that voice for a second,

Also this Shot right here is really Menacing AF, like Jor El looks seriously scary, oh and it looks like lois lost her memory so I'm wondering how that's going to play out

I fnd it very weird that Kara thinks Brainiac is Unstoppable Just because he's in Clark's body, like may I remind you of the absolute beatdown you gave your cousin a few episodes ago, like I'm really starting to believe that whole thing that people say of people who join the quote unquote "good side" end up effing sucking afterwards, like what is with that stuff, also before you say she was only able to beat him bc she was being controlled by Brainiac and therefore wasn't in control of her actions/ Strength, yeah sry but No, she wasn't being controlled by him at that time and was completely aware of what she was doing, the only time he was controlling her, was when she was hesitating to use her Heat vision to kill people, aside from that she was fully aware and wasn't Holding Back on him AT ALL; Also Mandy is such a bitch, that is all

Omg lois lost her memories I wonder this gonna play out, will she fall in love with Clark again, will clark remember who he is, will they even get along with each other, the possibilites are endle- Oh, well Never effing mind I guess, huh that was fast 😅 Also I really love the fact that Clark instead of becoming a warrior in this reality, became more of a scientist, it's funny because in the original animated series he was kinda like that as well, heck even in the comics I think he was like that, it just shows that Clark no matter what, really was never a fighter to begin with and only really ever does it in the name of Defense, with his real goal being to want to just help people through whatever means necessary, mainly through the power of science, like how in that 1 comic when he found the cure to cancer or something, Also can someone really explain to me how lois was able to prevent herself from being deleted, like I don't think it was ever explained and I'm really starting to believe it was just because of PLOT

Bruh Jimmy looks So heated at the fact that Steve of all people was the reason he and Kara were able to escape, like are you kidding me, THIS GUY!? 🤣🤣 Also shout out to my boy Steve for coming in clutch for our boy Jimmy, like he really is the Homie and I gotta say, the best get away driver like how do you sneak from Amanda waller of all people Undetected, dude's got skills

Hey Lois Idk about you but In my opinion This was the Worst explanation I ever heard, like I understand that time is resetting and so you've probably explained this to him like a hundred of times but Wow, you Really couldn't go any other way about it, like ya do realize this makes you look like a Crazy person right?; Also I legit could Never understnd Why she straight up tell couldn't tell Clark she loves him, like Omg wasn't you 2 already in a relationship at the beginning of this season, why is it So hard for you all of asudden o say I love you, when you LITERALLY established relationship early on, like WTF I'm sick of this trope already

Ok 2 things: 1 Jor El is scary in this sequence, like the way he screamed "Find her" really sent chills down my spine, and 2 why does this shot with him peeking out of the Bushes feel incredibly meme worthy?

Tbh I actually don't have much to say regarding Kara and Jimmy this time, aside from Jimmy being the GOAT due to how beautiful pep talk was, and how much I want them to end up together now, like I've said it before but I absolutely love their relationship in this series, and I really hope they get together by the end of it or at least if she ends up leaving earth like people theorize, in order to atone for her sins across the galaxy, at least get to confess his feelings for her ^w^

"Because the real lois wouldn't come for me" Ngl he deserved this exact response from her, bc wtf do you mean bro, i mean underrated your reasoning but just because you 2 had a fight doesn't mean she Stopped loving you, because you KNOW she wouldn't be here rn if she didn't; Also I find it very funny that her revealing What she did and how dangerous it was, is what brings Clark back, like it just shows how much he cares about her and how overprotective he is for her safety, Also I think i understand why she was able to do all this stuff in the 1st place

THROUGH THE POWER OF LOVE!! 💖💖😭😭😭

Tbh This is probably 1 of the best versions of Task force X I've seen so far, like this Roster goes Hard and so does this entire Shot like Damn, also whoever's Idea it was to Not include Parasite in this Scene Needs to be fired, like I understand why Livewire isn't here But PARASITE!? I mean the guy is seriously OP when given enough energy, as proven by his Kaiju form last season, and I could've sworn Amanda does has control over him now thanks to Lex, so WHY THE F$%k HE ISN'T HERE!? I bet he would've came in Real handy tho 😂

Ok 2 thing's again: 1 YEAH LET'S GO KARA! Eff you Brainiac you Piece of S#%t i hope you effing Die, and 2, Eyy i looks like I was on to something about Them being infused with Kryptonite; Also i see were Still stuck with these robot designs I guess, *sigh* look I've said it before and I'll say it again, These designs absolutely Suck, like No offense to the Animators But you're Really telling me we couldn't have gotten Anything better, I understand animation is Hard So you Need simple designs but c'mon, you couldn't at least go with the skeletal design he has in some iterations or even make Them look more like a Megazord than whatever the Hell this is? man I really hope this gets fixed in season 3 or something because I Just can't with this anymore; Also is it me or does this whole setup kinda feel sorta familiar, because I feel like I've seen this before, hmmmmm 🤔 eh whatever

God I love this Scene, from the scenery,to the lighting, to even their effing confession everything is Just AAAAAHHH So effing GOOD, Damn it Love this Series!! Especially the music in this scene like Omg it's such bop to listen to, and the fact that it's even the extended version of the God Damn intro is freakin Amazing ^^ Like this belongs in Top 5 motivational scene alongside You say run from the ending of the 1st MHA movie, like it's just That Good

OOOHH I'M LOVING THIS NEW SUIT Omg like this has everything I've ever wanted in a Superman suit, it has the perfect amount of gold to contrast the Red and blue, it reminds of Man of Steel and New 52 with Lack of shorts even tho I personally prefer the shorts, and it just Screams Superman, the only thing I would change about this would be those big ass Shoulder pads and i think maybe those finger straps, but aside from that, PERFECTION 😘

Small little animation error regarding Kara's eyebrows But not even that can Ruin this epic moment ^^

Finally It looks like people may be on to something about Amanda Waller possibly Framing Lex, setting him up to be the fall guy and making him look like he was The 1 responsible for everything, possibly losing his fame and setting him up as the Villain Next season, after all he is the 1 who built the Metalos So if anything went wrong, it is technically his fault, anyway however this plays out, I'm sure it will all end horribly for Lex in the end, overall amazing episode can't wait for the next one, hopefully it doesn't take too long to be released like this one, fingers crossed ^^

[cradleghost]

LYLA helped Miles escape Nueva York

Hear me out

- as soon as the Go Home Machine booted up she would have theoretically know about it         -  I’m not sure exactly how integrated she is in the Spider Society system in ATSV but my personal opinion is that she basically runs the place.                 + She has a connection to all of the gizmos in order to send pings and allow them all to communicate

               + constantly scanning for anomalies 

               + able to keep track of and record information across dimensions 

               + Miguel would want her to be able to have access to basically everything because he has severe FOMO and wants to be in-the-know everything in order to keep a handle on it — and LYLA is the only one he trusts to do it. 

- with all that, Miles didn’t Sabotage anything when he returned to the base, he simply booted up the systems, which would immediately alert LYLA 

- My Guess is, that since she has such a close relationship with Miguel, she has seen the downward spiral he has been on, and knows that Miles fighting back and not following Miguel��s orders was the final push for him to snap (I have other thoughts about this in regards to both LYLA and Peter B. that I will get into later. 

- Because she knows that Miguel has tipped over that edge, and what she is capable of, once she receives the notification that the GHM Is active (after “seeing” the whole chase and, again — theoretically, hearing the conversation between Miguel, Miles, Peter, and Gwen, she makes the decision to help Miles.)            + she does this by letting the program run, letting Miles boot the systems and filling in what he missed in the startup that he didn’t know about, allowing him access to the hand-scan and admin protocols.

- when Margot trying to figure out what was going on, LYLA kept throwing screens in front of her, and distracting her

               + if she is as integrated as I believe she is, she wouldn’t have had to ask “what’s happening” — it would have been simple: ALERT: unknown admin access — no designation (which should have been denied (she’s a super computer, she could make an educated guess that after they all lost track of Miles that the attempted access was him)), SCAN: earth-42 (which, if she is able to access a database of dimensions, like when she was tracking spot, she knows is one with no registered spider-person, which again, educated guess could tell her that Miles (who she knows is from Earth-1610 and who was bit by a spider not from his home dimension)) was the one booting it up.

- with all of that: Miguel knows that Miles’s DNA scan would come up with something other than Earth-1610 (he’s a geneticist in the comics so I’m translating that into him in ATSV, and knows that the scan would be funky with it). While he may not know Exactly what universe Miles’s dna would show, he counts on LYLA to send him wherever the GHM sent Miles when Miguel opens his own portal, and because he is so in-the-moment and pissed, doesn’t double check, ending up in E-1610 where LYLA knows Miles Is Not Currently Located.

Anyway I’m sure I’ve missed some things but these are just some of my Many Thoughts on the subject

[butterfleyequeen]

A KinitoPET Ending Concept

Ayyy, guess who recently finished playing that funky pink blorbo game and has massive brainrot? 👉👩👈

*sips from water bottle* A'ight.

So after getting the normal/bad endings (the ones where Kinito traps you), my braincells decided to rub together and cook up an ub3r sp00ky idea of what a third variation could look like--specifically, a "secret ending" where you just refuse to answer Kinito's final question--and it goes a li'l somthing like this:

You get to the part at the end where he asks you to stay with him. The pop-up window is up, displaying its "yes"/"no" options. He is waiting patiently for your answer.

If you continually attempt to close the window, or just do nothing at all, he slowly gets more and more upset.

"Why won't you answer me?"

"I really do want to make you happy."

"I promise you will be happy and safe here."

"Don't you believe me?"

He tries to manipulate you.

"There will be no more loneliness. No more pain. No more suffering. No more death.

Just happiness."

"You will live forever, happy forever, with a perfect friend who will never leave your side.

Is that so bad?"

He's getting desperate.

"Please answer me."

Time goes by. His patience is running thin.

"Answer me."

His eyes are wide open; gaze trembling. The background darkens, surrounded by a faint tinge of red. The screen begins to "throb" as that familiar heartbeat sound plays; going faster and faster the longer you take to make your choice.

If you continue down the path of refusing to make this choice, the screen will suddenly glitch out as the pop-up window disappears. The throbbing heartbeat stops, but the background continues to darken.

"You know what? Fine.

If you won't make a decision..."

He begins to twitch; the background glitching in unison.

His colors flash a oversaturated monochrome palette as he says in his creepy whisper-voice:

"I ' L L M A K E I T F O R Y O U ."

A piercing, screeching noise plays as everything on the screen suddenly glitches ballistically before cutting to black.

A few tense moments of silence pass by.

Then suddenly, you hear a loud, glitching, scream-like sound play as the screen starts flashing white, surrounded by another tinge of red. Kinito appears, close up, his darkened visage bearing two realistic eyes reminiscent of something from one of those cliché analog horror videos. Gaze fixated on you, an audible glass-breaking sound plays as he proceeds to smash his disembodied fists against the screen, causing it to "crack".

Screen cuts to black again. Cue credits sequence as normal. Only this time, the model of the computer monitor over to the side has a broken, flickering screen.

An achievement pops up, titled "No Third Option". The icon bears the same background as all the other achievements, only this time, it's just the background alone but reddened with a cracked-glass effect. The description reads: "Kinito took matters into his own hands."

It really was a no-win situation, no matter what you did (or rather, didn't) do--the moment you gave him administrative access, you were his. And he was going to claim you, one way or another.

...'k, I'm going to bed.

[oohnotvery]

Update - Hand To Your Heart + Life

cw/tw: pregnancy (mine), pregnancy loss (not mine)

Hi everyone,

I feel like I owe people an update since I started writing Hand To Your Heart a few weeks ago and have only posted a measly 3 chapters.

I've been realllyyyyy MIA since starting this fic, and there's a big reason. As some people guessed . . . I'm pregnant! And it's already been a vastly different experience than my first time being pregnant. I have NO ENERGY AT ALL.

Honestly, it's still pretty early so I'm in the throes of nausea/exhaustion/all that fun first trimester stuff. I'm so happy but it's taken my mind completely off anything writing. At night (when I usually take time to write), I can barely manage to even open my computer. I want to get back to this story really badly, but my mind has just been so so so preoccupied.

Anyways . . . thought everyone deserved to know :)

Finally, I want to take a moment to acknowledge that there are legions of human beings in this world who are desperately trying to conceive, or who have received discouraging diagnoses related to pregnancy, or who have lost babies, or who have experienced birth trauma, or who lack access to maternal care, or who have to fly across the country to receive the care they need, or who are denied access to abortions, or who are being faced with the prospect of IVF being taken off the table, or who won't receive maternity leave from their employers . . . the list goes on forever and ever and ever.

Women are demonized in this country, but pregnant women especially. Being pregnant is simultaneously empowering and defeating. I almost died in childbirth because the doctors refused to take my health concerns into consideration. I am, frankly, terrified of giving birth again.

And then there are the painful, painful, painful parts of trying and failing to get pregnant, or losing a baby . . . I grieve with those of you in this position, I truly do.

Thank you for reading this. <3 Lots of love.

-E.

[atearyamallari]

A Turtle's Guide to Escaping Midtown Precinct South: Part Three

Click here to start at the beginning!

//

If your loved one has been arrested by the NYPD and is being held in Midtown Precinct South, make sure you gather as much information about the precinct as possible. In the words of Sun Tzu, If you know your enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles.

Leo anxiously knocked on April’s door. “Come on,” he muttered. He waited a few seconds before knocking again.

The door swung open. “Hey, guys!” April said, smiling. “How’s –”

“Raph got arrested and we need to bust him out of jail,” Leo blurted out, pushing past her and into the apartment.

“Can I use your computer, April?” Don asked. Then, without waiting for a reply, “Thanks!” He made a beeline for her computer at her work desk.

“Do you have any snacks?” Mikey asked. “I’m hungry.” He marched into the kitchen and began rummaging through her fridge.

April stood at the entrance to her apartment with her mouth agape. “W-wait a minute, hold on!” she said, finally finding her voice. “What’s going on here? Did you say Raph got arrested?”

Leo ignored her and speed-dialed Casey on his shell cell. “Come on, pick up,” he said nervously. After a few rings, Casey greeted him on the other end. “Casey, I need you to come to April’s apartment right away,” Leo said. “It’s an emergency.”

“Whoa, okay,” Casey said, sounding somewhat startled. “What’s the sitch?”

“Yeah, Leo, what’s happening?” April asked.

Leo explained to both of them how Raph got arrested by the police, and how he and his brothers narrowly made their escape through the subways. By the time he finished his story, Casey had arrived at April’s door and was brushing away the slush that clung to his coat.

“Lemme guess,” Casey said. “You got a plan to break Raph out, and it involves me and April.”

“We don’t have a full plan yet,” Leo said. “In order to make this work, we need to figure out where the police are keeping Raph. Then we need to find out as much as we can about their security.”

April’s face paled. “You don’t think the EPF has him, do you?”

“No. It was definitely just the NYPD,” Leo replied. “But if we don’t hurry, they might deliver him right into Bishop’s hands.” He marched over to the desk where Don was conducting his research. “Donny, were you able to find him?”

“Yes,” he replied, typing some commands into the computer. “I tracked down his shell cell. He’s on West 35th Street.” The screen displayed a map with a green dot on the west side of Manhattan. “There’s a police department there. Midtown Precinct South.”

“Okay, that’s a good start,” Leo said. “Were you able to access any information about the building? Blueprints? Security camera footage?”

“Blueprints, yes. Camera footage, no. It looks like all of their security measures are connected to their own private server.”

“So we won’t be able to access any video logs unless we physically plug ourselves into their system,” April said.

That was going to make breaking Raph out a little harder. “What else you got?” Leo asked.

“Nothing good,” Don warned. “Check this out. About eighty-five percent of all suspects that come through this police department end up going through Riker’s Island.”

“Riker’s Island? The Riker’s Island?” Casey asked. “The one off the Bronx?”

“The jail where people go to die?” Mikey asked.

“The one and only,” Don said.

Leo turned the facts over in his head. “Eighty-five percent,” he repeated. “All going to one jail complex. That’s an unusually high rate.”

“I thought so, too,” Don said. “So I did a little more digging. About a year ago, a former police sergeant who served at Midtown Precinct South came forward and exposed some of the unethical practices that were rampant in the department. Intimidation tactics, excessive force, racial profiling, you name it.” He paused. “Two months later, she was found dead in her apartment.”

“I don’t like where this is going,” Mikey said.

“That’s not all. I also looked into Riker’s Island,” he continued. “Apparently, the facilities there are contracted out to South Hudson Prison Properties. The CEO, Mr. David Williams, is a multimillionaire who lives in Seattle. But get this: every time the chief of police of Midtown, Chief Alice Torres, holds a press conference, Mr. Williams personally makes his appearance.”

“Looks like Chief Torres and Mr. Williams are working together,” Leo said, connecting the dots.

“That’s the private prison industry for ya,” Casey said grimly.

“What do you mean?”

“See, private prison contractors make money the same way hotels make money – by makin’ sure all the beds are full,” he explained. “So, it’s in their best interest to keep as many prisoners as possible. If you got a police department that’s feedin’ you people, then you’re gonna be the best of pals.”

“You sure know a lot about the prison system,” Mikey noted.

“Yeah.” He folded his arms over his chest. “Let’s just say I got multiple reasons for keeping kids like Angel off the streets.”

A dead whistleblower. Police misbehavior. The CEO of a private prison corporation working together with the chief of police. “This whole situation reeks of bribery,” April said.

“Bingo,” said Don.

“But this doesn’t exactly help us come up with a plan to bust Raph out,” Leo said, frowning.

“I know,” Don said. “But maybe there’s more we can do here. Think about it. Hundreds of people have been sent to one of the worst jails in America because of this one corrupt police chief. Maybe they’re not exactly innocent, but most of them are probably honest people who made an honest mistake.” Don looked Leo in the eyes as if to silently plea with him. “We could put an end to this.”

“But how?” Mikey asked. “It’s just five of us against a department full of corrupt cops. And we still need to break Raph out and do it all under four hours.”

“Three, now,” Don reminded them.

“Exactly! You’d need a team of superheroes to pull this one off,” Mikey said.

“No,” Leo said. “For something like this, you’d need people who can operate covertly. Ninjas.” A plan started forming in his mind – one that would have a lot of moving parts, but one that was doable. “Okay, I have an idea. Casey, I’m gonna need you to provide a distraction at the precinct.”

“Yes!” Casey cried. “It’s a good thing I brought my hockey stick and cricket bat.”

April facepalmed. “Please don’t do anything that would get you arrested,” she moaned.

Casey scratched his chin thoughtfully. “Hm, okay. I’ll consider doin’ something else then. But I’d have to think about what it is first…”

“Don, how fast can you fix up the Battle Shell?” Leo asked.

He appeared to carefully think about it. “I can get it done in an hour,” he answered confidently.

“That’s perfect. And while you’re doing that, would you be able to make a few calls?”

Don’s expression turned into one of irritation. “Why can’t Mikey do that?” he asked.

“Because I’m gonna have Mikey doing something else at the precinct.”

“Aw, yeah, I can see it coming together now!” Mikey said. “Michelangelo, kicking butt and taking names!”

“Not exactly,” Leo said. “More like staying really, really quiet the whole time. I know that’s gonna be hard for you, but I believe you can do it. And April.”

“Yeah?” Leo smirked. “How would you like to work at a police department for a day?”

Previous | Next

[aghostinmyownmachine]

dbh-adjacent writing-program nonsense under the cut, a.k.a. let's talk a bit about WriteMonkey 3

I've used WriteMonkey 2 and 3 on and off for. hm. I guess it's gotta be eight or nine years now? but those instances of use have always been erratic and short lived, and I've usually returned to either Scrivener or, more frequently for many reasons, MS Word. (I also did just a ton of first-draft writing in discord back when I had an account and c/ped my writing from there into Word. near-peerless syncing between devices, appalling security practices. what can ya do 🙃)

anyway, due to ~circumstances~ I've switched to writing on a computer that isn't my writing program–filled work laptop, and so I've been experimenting with WM3 again because it's super lightweight due to plaintext markdown instead of rich text and I have a license key for it, which = fun plugins. it's also way less complicated and labor intensive to set up per project and use than, say, Scrivener. I love Scrivener! but scriv can be overwhelming and distracting when all I want to do is write, especially if I want a unique, quick-to-set-up theme (and I always do, because Aesthetic Is Everything), which is one of the reasons WM3 is so handy

in addition to the gorgeous stripped-down UI that showcases whatever background I choose (mine can be found here!), WM3 has some really neat little plugins? I don't actually use the word-frequency checker myself, but WM3's shows you where each word appears in the document via the little indicator bars to the right of the word, which. rad! (you can tell at a glance which chapters are written in whose POV based off name usage alone and I think that's neat.) also, when you click on a given word in the frequency list, it'll highlight that word throughout the document and also display all uses of it vertically over the scroll bar path. lots of nice little visual indicators of what's going on. I just really like the design, it's simple but extremely useful and intuitive

admittedly, Scrivener cannot be beat when it comes to how easily you're able to make notes in it due to its multitude of note-taking locations, plus it has internal splitscreen capabilities that make referencing a second document a breeze, so there's definitely a mental transition involved when it comes to WM3 and its single-document-at-a-time system, on top of switching to markdown-style comments/reminders. that said! being able to not only see those comments below the headings in the left-hand sidebar but also jump to them when they're clicked? stellar 10/10 would use again

finally, the repository. I <3 the repository. being able to quickly toss whatever text I'm not quite ready to delete or info I know I'll want to reference at some point in the future into the repository is great. it's a seamless process, only a couple seconds' worth of effort required, allowing my focus to stay on what I'm writing instead of distracting myself by tabbing my way through various open files to find my notes. plus the repository is searchable(!!!!!), and using it also keeps the actual text editor clean visually, especially since the right-hand sidebar can be hidden too:

hm! possibly that is a sneak preview of chapter one! who can say!

so yeah! if you're looking for a stripped-down, highly customizable, portable writing program, I absolutely recommend it. there are downsides, of course, the biggest one being no official WM3 mobile options available at present, but since the program is both portable and plaintext, you can toss it into a syncing service and access it via your handheld devices that way. it's also not open source, and you need to pay to access the truly useful plugin features. with all that said, if you don't mind fiddling around with some CSS to make everything look juuuuuuuuust right, you can get yourself a really snazzy setup with relatively little effort. but maybe that's just me—aesthetic is king and all that

[regexkind]

Make-a-fish

There is a very cute site out there: http://makea.fish

It was written by @weepingwitch

If it is 11:11 AM or PM according to your machine's clock, you can visit this page and get a cute procedurally-generated fish image. Like this:

At other times, you will get a message like this:

This is charming enough that I have a friend who has a discord channel devoted entirely to people's captures of fish at 11:11. But it's also a fun code-deobfuscation puzzle. Solution below the cut--I checked, and it's ok for me to share the solution I came up with :)

If you show source for the makea.fish website:

Basically:

an image, set by default to have a pointer to a source that doesn't really exist

a script, that is one big long line of javascript.

The javascript is where we are going. Start by loading it into an editor and prettifying it up. It's like taking home a scrungly cat and giving it a wash. or something idk.

Believe it or not this is better. Also, maybe there are some low-hanging fruits already we can pick?

Like this:

Each of the strings in this array is composed of escaped characters. Escaped hex characters are useful if you need to put characters in your string that are not available on the keyboard or might be interpreted as part of the code, but here I think they're just being used to hide the actual contents of the string.

I used python to deobfuscate these since the escape sequences should be understood by python as well. And lo--not only are they all symbols that can be rendered (no backspaces or anything!) but they also look like base64 encoded strings (the =, == terminators are a giveaway).

What happens if we run these through a base64 decoder?

We see that the array actually contains base64-encoded strings. Perhaps a portion of this code is converting these strings back, so that they can be used normally?

At any rate I am going to rename the variable that this array is assigned to to "lookupTable" because that's what I think of it as.

We are making an anonymous function and immediately calling it with two arguments: lookupTable and 0xd8. 0xd8 is 216 in decimal. By renaming the variables, we get:

Confession time, I am not a person who writes lots of javascript. But it occurs to me that this looks an awful lot like we're being weird about calling functions. Instead of traditional syntax like "arrayInput.push(arrayInput.shift())" we're doing this thing that looks like dictionary access.

Which means that, according to the docs on what those two array functions are doing, we are removing the first element of the array and then putting it on the end. Over and over again. Now I could try to reason about exactly what the final state of the array is after being executed on these arguments but I don't really want to. A computer should do this for me instead. So I in fact loaded the original array definition and this function call into a JS interpreter and got:

['Z2V0SG91cnM=', 'd3JpdGVsbg==', 'PEJSPjExOjExIG1ha2UgYSBmaXNo', 'PEJSPmNvbWUgYmFjayBhdCAxMToxMQ==', 'Z2V0TWlsbGlzZWNvbmRz', 'Z2V0U2Vjb25kcw==', 'Z2V0RWxlbWVudEJ5SWQ=', 'c3Jj', 'JnQ9', 'JmY9']

This is our array state at this time. By the way, this comes out to

['getHours', 'writeln', '11:11 make a fish', 'come back at 11:11', 'getMilliseconds', 'getSeconds', 'getElementById', 'src', '&t=', '&f=']

(there are some BR tags in there but the Tumblr editor keeps eating them and I'm too lazy to fix that).

What's next? Apparently we are defining another function with the name "_0x2f72". It is called very often and with arguments that look like small numbers. It is the only place our lookupTable is directly referenced, after the last little shuffler function. So my guess is deobfuscator for the elements of the array.

It takes two arguments, one of them unused. Based on my hunch I rename the function arguments to tableIndex and unused.

One of the first things we do seems to be using the awesome power of javascript type coercion to get the input as an integer:

tableIndex=tableIndex-0x0;

Normal and ranged.

The next thing that is done seems to be assigning the return value, which may be reassigned later:

var retVal=lookupTable[tableIndex];

The next line is

if(deobfuscatorFn['MQrSgy']===undefined) {...

Again, I'm not exactly a javascript person. My guess is that "everything is an object" and therefore this value is undefined until otherwise set.

indeed, much further down we assign this key to some value:

deobfuscatorFn['MQrSgy']=!![];

I don't know enough javascript to know what !![] is. But I don't need to. I'll as a js interpreter and it tells me that this evaluates to "true". Based on this I interpret this as "run this next segment only the first time we call deobfuscatorFn, otherwise shortcircuit past". I rewrite the code accordingly.

The next block is another anonymous function executed with no arguments.

Within the try catch block we seem to be creating a function and then immediately calling it to assign a value to our local variable. The value of the object in our local variable seems to be the entire js environment? not sure? Look at it:

My guess is that this was sketchy and that's why we assign "window" in the catch block. Either way I think we can safely rename _0x2611d5 to something like "windowVar".

We then define a variable to hold what I think is all the characters used for b64 encoding. May as well relabel that too.

Next we check if 'atob' is assigned. If it isn't we assign this new function to it, one which looks like it's probably the heart of our base64 algorithm.

I admit I got lost in the weeds on this one, but I could tell that this was a function that was just doing string/array manipulation, so I felt comfortable just assigning "atob" to this function and testing it:

vindication! I guess. I think I should probably feel like a cheater, if I believed in that concept.

we next assign deobfuscatorFn['iagmNZ'] to some new unary function:

It's a function that takes an input and immediately applies our atob function to it. Then it...what...

tbh I think this just encodes things using URI component and then immediately decodes them. Moving on...

deobfuscatorFn['OKIIPg']={};

I think we're setting up an empty dictionary, and when I look at how it's used later, I think it's memoizing

Yup, basically just caching values. Cool!

We now have a defined deobfuscatorFn. I think we can tackle the remaining code fairly quickly.

First thing we do is get a Date object. This is where the time comes from when deciding whether to get the fish image.

Actually, let's apply deobfuscatorFn whenever possible. It will actually increase the readability quite a bit. Remember that this just does base64 decoding on our newly-shuffled array:

relabeling variables:

In other words, if the hours is greater than 12 (like it is in a 24 hour clock!) then subtract 12 to move it to AM/PM system.

Then, set "out" to be x hours minutes concatenated. Like right now, it's 16:36 where I am, so hours would get set to 4 and we would make x436x be the output.

Next, if the hours and minutes are both 11 (make a fish), we will overwrite this value to x6362x and print the makeafish message. Otherwise we print a request to comeback later. Finally, we lookup the fish image and we tell it to fetch this from "makea.fish/fishimg.php?s={millis}&t={out}&f={seconds}"

(there's a typo in the pictures I have above. It really is f=seconds).

Thus, by visiting makea.fish/fishimg.php?s=420&t=x6362x&f=69

we can get a fish. It appears to be random each time (I confirmed with weepingwitch and this is indeed truly random. and the seconds and millis don't do anything).

Now you can make fish whenever you want :)

[eldritchsurveys]

1238.

What type of milk do you like to drink? >> I don't drink any kind of milk by itself.

Do you have a first aid kit at home? >> I do not. It's one of those "if we had more disposable income we'd have one, but as it stands it's low on the list of priorities when so many other immediate needs require meeting" sort of things. I guess if either of us got injured more often it'd be a higher priority.

What’s the absolute bare minimum in terms of facilities when you’re camping? >> Food and something to protect me from the elements and bare ground.

How many places have you lived in your life? >> Five different states and countless different specific locations.

Are your parents dog or cat people? Is that different or the same as you? .

What’s your favourite flavour of potato chip? >> Basic kettle-cooked salt and pepper. Zapp's Voodoo chips if I want more flavour.

What’s the longest your hair has ever been? How long is it now? .

What video games remind you of your childhood? >> Just the classic nineties-era computer games that you found in every computer lab in school, like Oregon Trail, and various Bröderbund games I had for my own computer. No actual video games because I didn't have access to those.

What does your body wash or soap smell like? >> It's the Dove Beauty Bar, which just smells like... soap, I guess. The quintessential soap smell.

Are there are sounds that bother you on a visceral level? >> So, so many. I genuinely don't know how I'm going to keep living on this planet sometimes.

What was the last thing you bought online? >> FFXIV: Dawntrail, back when that was about to drop.

Name something you always have in your fridge. >> Various condiments.

Have you ever had to hire a lawyer? Why? >> The closest I've come is getting an advocate from one of those urban justice orgs for my SSI application process.

Have you taken a walk today? Did you see any dogs? >> I have not. The humidity has worn me down, I can't get motivated to take my morning walks these days because I just obsess about how sticky I'm going to be the whole time. Also, sunrise is now 07:00 and that's so late, people are so active at that point, it's not like the beautifully quiet dawns of midsummer :/

What vegetable do you really hate? >> I honestly can't say I hate any vegetables. There are some I'm far less likely to eat, but none that I flat-out can't stand.

Does your family have any traditions or rituals? .

If you could learn any language, what would it be? >> Well, I can learn any language, at least passably if not fluently. Right now, I'm working on Irish.

What was the best thing that happened today? Something that seems minor can still be awesome. >> I was finally finishing my Person of Interest rewatch now that my loins are girded enough to handle that sort of emotional damage, and I got so much lightning-flash inspiration for merging that universe with my Saints Row one. I love that feeling, it's like... being full of electricity, being plugged in, connected to the fabric of reality. Seeing how the threads intertwine, and how they can be made to weave new stories. !! What a thrill. Have you ever donated money to a charity? Which one? >> As a person who is known for Having No Money, I have not. I am, in fact, a charity case.

Did you have a large circle of friends in high school? >> I had no circle of friends in high school. There were about two or three kids tops in each school that would put up with me.

Would you ever get a matching tattoo with someone? >> I have matching X-Files tattoos with Sparrow, and I'd do it again. The trick is to make it a tattoo similar to something you'd get independently anyway -- I had already had the "scully, it's me" tattoo idea and when I was planning to get it, they were like "hey what if we matched", and I was fine with that.

What time do you usually go to sleep? >> I go to bed at 22:00 and I stop using my phone at 23:00 (the last part tends to vary, but that's where I'm at right now). When I go to sleep, however, is not something I can control.

Do you have a job? >> I do not.

What colour are the plates in your kitchen? >> We don't have a matching set. We mostly use paper plates, anyway. Well, I do, certainly.

What was the last gift you received? >> The stuff I got for Christmas -- the earbuds and the pillow and weighted blanket.

What is your Chinese zodiac animal? >> Rabbit, I think. Are you inside right now? If you’re home, what room of the house are you in? >> I'm in my bedroom, as usual.

Are you good at remembering faces? >> Good enough, I guess. I do have a hard time trying to place where I've seen certain actors and stuff, but I guess that's normal especially if you watch a lot of shit like I do. What will you do after this survey? >> I might poke around on tumblr. I don't know, I feel like I did a bunch of stuff I wanted to do already so now I'm like "now what :V"

[synthy-sizer]

[HERESY is ONLINE]

HERESY: Hello? Is somebody there?

A text chat is open on the computer. It looks like someone is trying to reach out. You don't know why, but just as the hatch and computer terminal seemed to call to you, the text chat does as well. You feel compelled to reach out somehow.

Talk to HERESY>

[VitalsStation12B is ONLINE]

VitalsStation12B: Hello?

HERESY: I can't believe it…

HERESY: Someone actually answered.

HERESY: I didn't fully believe it when the station read as active again.HERESY: And yet here you are.

VitalsStation12B: Who exactly are you?

VitalsStation12B: And what is this place?HERESY: I guess it makes sense you wouldn't know what's happening, seeing as the moon has become how it is.

HERESY: Where you're standing is a station that monitors the vitals of the moon's internal mechanisms. There's a lot of them.

HERESY: These stations used to make sure that the systems that keep the moon habitable are still up and running, but I suppose they're pretty self-sufficient at this point.

VitalsStation12B: Uh, I'm sorry, but I'm totally lost here…

VitalsStation12B: I don't know what any of this even means…

HERESY: Ah, right…sorry.

HERESY: You probably need a better explanation.

HERESY: I need you to follow my lead, ok?

HERESY: Tab out of this chat and open the vitals monitor, please, I need to know what it says.

You minimize the window and examine the desktop. There only seems to be 3 APPLICATIONS on the screen.

Look at applications>

There are 3 applications on the desktop in front of you. One reads INSTANT MESSENGER. The second reads VITALS MONITOR. The third reads EUTHANASIA PROTOCOL.

Open instant messenger>

Double-clicking the application only seems to open the chat you just minimized. You minimize it again, mildly frustrated at the small error. However, opening the messenger again highlights a detail you hadn't noticed before; a list of CONTACTS available to talk to.

Look at contacts>

There doesn't appear to be anyone online, and all of the contacts have names very similar to the one assigned to you. However, there is one that stands out, that has a completely different name. MILKNEWS.

Click on milknews>

[MilkNews is ONLINE]

MilkNews: Hey what's up man

MilkNews: I'm so bored

VitalsStation12B: Dude did you seriously set a custom name for yourself?

VitalsStation12B: You know you can't do that

MilkNews: Who caaaaaares mannnnn

MilkNews: What are they gonna do, fire us?

VitalsStation12B: Jeez, don't say I didn't warn you

VitalsStation12B: Were you also too stupid to bring any entertainment?

MilkNews: My Wonderswan died

VitalsStation12B: That's why I use crosswords, no batteries required

MilkNews: Can't play a strategy game on a crossword puzzle book!

VitalsStation12B: Look I would love to talk but you know as well as I do that the communication terminals are business only

MilkNews: You're way too stuck up

VitalsStation12B: Whatever man

VitalsStation12B: I'll see you after my shift

[MilkNews is OFFLINE]

Well, that's certainly strange. You wonder what the people in the chat logs were talking about. It does little to illuminate what exactly this room is and what it was built for. Or how the stranger talking to you got ahold of it.

Minimize instant messenger>

You once again minimize the application and turn your attention to the only one you haven't looked at.

Open euthanasia protocol>

Although an application opens, it appears as though whatever the program does, it's locked behind a code. It seems unlikely you will be able to find a code anywhere that would grant you access. And even then, somehow the name makes you nervous. You don't want to fool with it.

Open vitals monitor>

A warm chime sounds from the computer when you double-click the application, followed by a simple loading screen bearing an emblem with the word "Apollo" underneath it. What does that mean? The loading screen finally disappears and a PAGE opens.

Look at page>

You examine the page; it's hard to understand exactly what the screen is trying to show you, though. The visuals are green on black, and the application is showing you some kind of diagram. There's a lot of strange shapes, but they're all contained within a circle, and there are 2 distinct wedges taking up the top third of it. All over the circle are small DOTS that have a number next to them.

Look at dots>

There's too many to count, but the highest number a dot is labeled with is 413. Although some of the dots are green, the vast majority are a blinking red, standing in harsh contrast to the green that makes up most of the shapes on-screen. You hear a small chime and the chat application flashes.

Talk to HERESY>

NEXT

PREVIOUS

[mj-dovy]

AZIRIPHALE FIGURING OUT HOW TO USE A COMPUTER!!!

(pretty please bestie 🥺)

HELL YEAH anything for you Timi

"Angel, what is that?" Crowley asked upon seeing the computer on one of the bookshop's many desks.

It was a beat up thing, boxy and a little dented in places. The screen was dusted over and the clunky keyboard had cobwebs between the keys. A sight truly out of 1998.

"Oh, that," Aziraphale shrugged it off. "Something Maggie gave me."

"It looks old," the demon commented, giving the device a nudge. It didn't respond, and Crowley backed away.

"I don't really know what I'm supposed to do with it," Aziraphale admitted. "Maggie just said something about needing to modernize."

"Don't you think you should try to set it up?" Crowley moved over towards it. "I hear you can access any book with it..."

Now this got the angel's attention, for books were one of his few weaknesses. Faster than Crowley had ever seen him go, Aziraphale sat down in front of the computer and began to press buttons at random.

"One of these has to turn the thing on," he muttered. Finally, his finger settled on the power button and the computer miraculously began to boot up. Thanks to Crowley, who watched in amusement from behind.

"Ah, there it goes!" Aziraphale said with a delighted smile.

The screen now displayed a bright turquoise background, and he looked at it closely.

"Crowley, I don't see any books here."

"I think that requires the internet, Angel."

Now Aziraphale was on a new mission, which shouldn't have been too hard considering he'd successfully turned it on. He began to click on the keyboard, frowning when nothing happened. Then he grabbed the mouse and began to click on random icons on the screen. To Aziraphale's shock and Crowley's delight, several windows popped up in response to his clicking.

Now frustrated, Aziraphale decided to perform a little miracle of his own. The computer turned off all of a sudden, the screen turning black.

"Well isn't that just a shame," the angel said, standing from his chair and backing towards Crowley. "I guess I will just have to keep reading the books in my shop."

Always one to tease, Crowley watched as the computer turned back on. "I actually think it's working again."

And another miracle was cast, turning the computer off for good. Aziraphale smiled at his partner with a finality that Crowley had to obey.

"Tea?" Aziraphale asked, and Crowley followed him to another room. The computer was left untouched for a long long time after that day.

[darkjanet2]

Sonic Adventure 2: Sonadow

Chapter 14: The Truth About Maria Robotnik

Inside the Space Colony ARK Sonic, Tails, and Amy roaming around the ship’s halls, they couldn’t seem to shake the feeling that something was off about their journey. It wasn’t as if they were forgetting something or someone important.

"This place is old and abandoned," said Amy.

"This place was shut down about 50 years ago because of a terrible accident," Tails said. "The first Bernoulli spherical space colony called ARK. When it was operational, it was filled with technology that could take us anywhere in the universe. I read a report that it was a perfect sphere."

"It sure seemed like it!" said Amy.

There's no time to waste before Eggman fires that weapon again," Sonic said. "We need to hurry! Let's destroy that cannon!"

"Right!" said Tails as he typed the keyboard on his computer. He typed several codes into an access terminal until the large computer screen showed one image of a massive gun mounted atop the ARK's main hull.

"Someone designed that weapon in a way that it is impervious to attacks from the outside. Its defense shields are super strong and will only be weakened once fired upon. The only way to defeat the shield is to hit it directly," said Tails as he opened the briefcase there was a topaz gem inside.

"Isn't that a Choas Emerald?" asked Amy.

"Yes, actually, it's a fake one that I created after researching the real Emerald. It has the same properties as the real emerald, but it has been enhanced with my ability to manipulate the energy from my Chaos Emeralds. So we're going to have to be very careful about this mission since Eggman will likely suspect something is amiss at the base. After all, that's where I first made this device," said Tails.

Tails gave the fake Emerald to Sonic, "Here. You go find the control room, and I'll find the power supply and destroy it, okay?"

Sonic nodded, "So the plan is, we'll switch the Choas Emeralds when the machine has stopped, yeah?"

Tails nodded as they both led the way leaving Amy behind.

"There they go again. They always have fun and leave me here all alone! I really never understand boys," she sighed as she headed toward the main hall.

*Meanwhile*

After surviving the spaceship crash, Knuckles glided through the ARK, then landed on the building and the crash sequence was completed. He sighed in relief.

"That was a close call. I guess I got separated from the others for a little while…"He then heard the sound of footsteps approaching him. He quickly turned around and faced the enemy. The figure that approached him was a white bat that wore a pink chest plate shaped like a heart, black leather pants, white gloves with pink tips, and white boots with pink hearts on the toes. She wore blue shadows with long lashes and pink lipstick.

"Well, look who finally joined the party," said Rouge, "I was starting to wonder when you'd show up."

"You again," said Knuckles annoyed.

Rouge smiled, "Come on now, don't be such a sourpuss. After all, isn't it your fault we ended up in trouble?" she asked, holding up the shards of Master Emerald. "With these, I have collected the shards of Emeralds." Knuckles didn't say anything, so Rouge continued. "So what do you say? Want some?"

"Fine, if it's what you want," Knuckles replied. "But I won't give you what I'm holding unless you give the shards to me, bat girl."

Rouge smirked, "Oh, you wish!"

She charged at the echidna. He swiftly sidestepped her attack and used a kick to knock her onto her back. He held out his hand as he bent down towards her, but she quickly grabbed it and flipped herself over. She ran straight at the echidna. Knuckles stood up and kicked her across the floor. Then he caught her as she rolled to a stop next to him. As she got up, she tried to punch him in the face, but Knuckles blocked. He lifted her up by the neck and tossed her aside. He jumped high into the air and tried to punch her down, but she dodged by sticking her foot to the floor. She attempted to throw a punch, but Knuckles blocked that too. They continued to dodge each other's attempts to attack each other. At last, Rouge managed to catch Knuckles in an overhead uppercut. Knuckles crashed right into the wall. He growled.

*Meanwhile*

Amy walked through the corridor, scanning every nook and cranny. She sighed, "I still can't believe this Sonic left me here. Why would he just abandon me?!" Amy muttered angrily as she continued forward.

Suddenly, she noticed the secret laboratory door in front of her. She opened the door and entered the lab, it was a high-tech lab. A workbench covered almost the entire length of the left side wall. An assortment of scientific tools and machinery littered the workspace. Amy looked around the room and found an array of monitors on various parts of the walls. There were screens showing the interior structure of the ARK.

"Wow, that's really neat!" Amy said. She approached the computer desk and stared at the large monitor screen as it displayed the exterior structure of the ship. She tapped the keyboard and the screen changed colors as a 3D hologram appeared. The image showed the ARK exterior and its inner structure. A series of lines connected the two ships. Each line terminated at the same point. One end of a line was connected with the mainframe, which was attached to the control panel. There was a password box on the screen.

"I gotta know what the password is, or else this'll never work!" said Amy aloud. She began searching around the desk until she found a piece of paper in the notebook. The password was Maria.

Amy raised her eyebrow, "Maria? That's a pretty common name, but who named the kid, anyway? Oh well. I have better things to think about anyway." She began typing the password into the computer system. The screen had unlocked and there was a wallpaper of Prof. Gerald Robotnik, Shadow, and a human girl named Maria.

"Who is this girl? Is her name Maria in the password?" wondered Amy as she examined the picture closer.

"She looks pretty. I wonder what happened to Maria 50 years ago?" thought Amy as she went to search through the information on Maria. Her eyes found the DVD under the paper on the desk. She then proceeded to the DVD into the optical disc drive. The video appeared on the screen and she began to watch.

Gerald was on the video footage as it played. The man was standing in front of an empty table that looked like it hadn't been used in a while.

"I'm Professor Gerald Robotnik, the greatest scientist ever to grace the earth," said the professor. He turned around and looked directly at the camera. "And this project that will change the world, is ready to begin. Now all that is left to do is gather the necessary data to complete our project, and we shall finally reach the ultimate form of reality!"

"I have created the Space Colony ARK. This vessel will contain the most advanced spacecraft technology available in the known cosmos. From the moment it leaves Earth's atmosphere, the crew will become the masters of the universe. The ARK is capable of traveling faster than light. In fact, the speed of light may even exceed light speed. We are capable of crossing the void without fear."

Just then the lab door slid open, and Amy gasped and turned to who it was. It was Tails who entered the lab, she sighed in relief.

"You scared the heck out of me, Tails," said Amy.

"Sorry. What did you find?" asked Tails.

"I found a video diary of Prof. Gerald Robotnik talking about how he created the ARK 50 years ago. And there was a story about a girl named Maria," said Amy.

"Maria?" asked Tails.

"Yeah, and you might want to watch it," she resumed the video.

Professor Gerald was speaking in front of the camera, "That day, my granddaughter Maria was diagnosed with NIDS. It is commonly known as Neuro-Immune Deficiency Syndrome. She has been battling the disease for months. But it seems that she has finally conquered the illness and is on her way to recovery. However, there is no doubt that the reason why I've developed the serum that can reverse these conditions is due to the research done by myself. Unfortunately, there is no cure for the disease. I only hope that one day, I can create Project Shadow as her treatment for her condition. Until then, she will need constant supervision over her health, and hopefully, soon she will be able to recover."

"So he created Shadow as her treatment? That doesn't make sense," said Amy.

"How does the NIDS help?" asked Tails.

"I don't know," she shrugged.

In the next part of the video, Prof. Gerald Robotnik was taken to Prison Island and was chained up in a chair, and there was a scribbling calculation on the wall. Amy and Tails gasped in horror.

"This is insane! How you could do something like that?!" yelled Prof. Gereald enraged. "Don't you realize what kind of destruction you're causing!?"

"Of course not. We know you created a dangerous weapon that threatens to wipe out humanity," replied Leader G.U.N. army. "We are going to make you pay for your crimes against mankind. We must destroy it."

"Destroy it?! You must be out of your mind! I am a scientist! Not a killer!" said the professor as he struggled against the chains holding him prisoner.

"What is the difference between a killer and a scientist?!" asked the G.U.N army, "Your kind has always been obsessed with science, with science alone."

"There is nothing wrong with being interested in science! You killed my granddaughter without mercy!" cried the professor.

Amy and Tails gasped in shock. "They killed his granddaughter?" whispered Tails.

"That's so cruel. She was just a kid!" Amy cried in protest.

"I plan to give you a taste of revenge. Once all seven Chaos Emeralds are collected, the colony will destroy the planet! All of you ungrateful humans, who took everything away from me will feel loss and despair!" yelled Gerald in rage on the screen.

"Is there anything else you want to say?" asked the leader.

Gerald hung his head down and spoke quietly, "No..."

The soldier cocked his rifle, "Ready!"

A gunshot rang out and Gerald fell to the ground with a bullet protruding through his head, causing Amy to cover her mouth while Tails shut his eyes tight. The screen went static after a few moments and the screen went black.

Amy slowly laid her hands down from her mouth. "I can't believe they did that... he was executed," she stated sadly as tears formed in her eyes.

"It was horrible...." said Tails softly.

"Should we tell Sonic about this?" asked Amy.

"I'm not sure, but--"

Eggman barged into the room shouting, "WHAT THE HELL DO YOU TWO THINK YOU'RE DOING IN HERE?!" he shouted causing Amy and Tails to scream. He stopped in his tracks and said, "What are you kids doing in here?"

*Meanwhile at the Control Room*

Sonic found the Choas Emeralds on the Eclipse Canon. He took out the fake Emerald and turned on the walkie-talkie.

"Tails, I found the Control Room and Choas Emeralds. Should I put the fake emerald on this now?" Sonic asked yet there was no reply.

"Tails, are you there?" asked Sonic worriedly.

'What's he doing right now?" thought Sonic.

[helluvascribe]

Rolando Reacts to "Mastermind"

Rolando: “Oh, it’s you again, mortal? Did you bring my popcorn? Well, it doesn’t matter because I have some here. I also have some yummy meat for the show here if you’d like. Remember last time when I reacted to ‘Ghostfuckers,’ the one episode I was in? Pretty fun until I had to watch my…uh…shocking death from those bastard ass imps. Now I’m stuck in the double dead state with my own thoughts. It’s incredibly agonizing, not to mention boring to watch your memories again and again…no new content, no delicious new fears to feast on.

I guess it’s time to react to another episode? Why the fuck not. This one is called ‘Mastermind,’ and it has my boss in it, the two-headed Queen Leviathan. She’s the one who sent me to Earth to infest the humans. It also has the other Sins in it, so it should be interesting. Let’s get started then.”

Andrealphus’ palace shows up.

Rolando: “This place looks fancy and quite…cool.”

The imp butler pours Andrealphus a drink. He slurps his drink.

“Hmm…you seem to be in good spirits, today.”

“Oh yes!” said Stella. “Stolas has had his heart shat on by that little imp cretin he was seeing!” She giggled.

Rolando: “Heheheh…it would sure be great if I could read Stolas’ thoughts, too, I bet his despair would be delectable!”

“Oh?” Andrealphus asked, intrigued.

“Yes, I believe he has finally learnt that that filthy little beast was only using him to gain access to his grimoire! Fucking moron!”

Stella laughed. Andrealphus spat out his drink, freezing the imp butler on the spot.

Rolando: *chuckles*

“Gain…gain access to his what?!” Andrealphus coughed.

“That fancy book thing,” Stella waved her hand.

“D-d-d-n-no, no, wait, wait, wait, wait! Stolas was letting an imp use his Goetia given grimoire, and you didn’t tell me?”

“Why do you care?”

“Because! We have been trying to figure out a means to usurp your horny ex-husband’s power, and this whole time, you knew about the incredibly illegal thing he was doing, and you didn’t think it might be a good idea TO LET ME KNOW?!” Andrealphus shouted as ice crept along the tables and walls and he turned into his more demonic form.

“WELL DON’T YELL AT ME!” Stella yelled back before casually sipping her drink.

Rolando: *chuckles*

“Now you fucking know!”

Andrealphus strolled out of the room. “You…are…so lucky you are hot, Stella!”

Rolando: “Wait, what the fuck? Isn’t she his brother?”

Blitzo squeezed a toy of Moxxie and faced the four interns.

Rolando: “Urgh, there he is again. Man, I hate that little lowlife.”

“So, the four of you aaarre…remind me again?”

“We’re interns, sir!” said a white-haired imp teen. “We’re looking for cool businesses to work for!”

Rolando: “Here’s some advice, kid. Don’t work for I.M.P. I like human slaughter too, but not those guys. Let professional demons handle the mortals.”

Blitzo pushed aside the intern’s note. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, I know what interns are, I’m not an idiot, okay? But I can’t really afford new employees at the moment.”

“Oh, interns work for experience, sir.”

“Come again?”

“Experience!”

“Ooh, you mean for free.”

“Experience?”

“Well, I can’t argue with free, kiddo! You’re hired!” Blitzo and the imp shook hands.

Moxxie burst into the room. “Sir! You need to see this!”

“COME OUT! WE’VE GOT YOU SURROUNDED!”

The dark reapers flew from an eye portal in the air.

Rolando: “Oh well this is new.”

A guard held out a scroll and I.M.P.s mugshots appeared on a holographic screen.

Rolando: “Ohohoho! You imps are in TROUBLE!”

“Employees of the illegal business I.M.P., you are hereby arrested for breaking demon law, surrender yourselves!”

“YOU GUYS ARE IN DEEP SHIT!”

Rolando: “Serves you right, I.M.P.! Have fun rotting in jail!”

“Blitz, what are we gonna do?” asked Moxxie.

“YOU CAN’T ESCAPE!”

Blitzo grabbed Moxxie’s face. “QUICK! HIDE EVERYTHING!”

Rolando: “Heheheh, good luck with that!”

Blitzo leaped onto Loona’s desk and exited out of her poker computer game. He pressed the ‘delete search history’ button and rapidly clicked to try and make it go faster.

Rolando: “You’re too late, I.M.P. It’s not gonna work.”

Millie crashed the computer with a swing of her battle axe.

Rolando: “I guess that works.”

Moxxie fumbled with a stack of papers.

“COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP!”

“WE ARE GOING TO BEAT YOU!”

Rolando: “Yes, beat them up!”

“BUT ONLY A LITTLE!”

Rolando: “Aww, where’s the fun in that?!”

“THERE’S NOWHERE TO RUN, YOU LITTLE RED SHITS!”

Rolando: *chuckles*

“FUUUCKK!” Lonna pulled out a drawer and pocketed a picture of the group together. She poured alcohol onto the papers and tried to ignite her lighter.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck!”

Millie grabbed Blitzo’s old costumes and tried to stuff them down the toilet with Blitzo’s rifle.

Rolando: “Urgh! Gross!”

“WE ARE GOING TO BEAT YOU! BUT-BUT ONLY A LITTLE! MAY-MAYBE A LOT!”

Rolando: “Yes, go ahead, I’d love to see that, please!”

“JUST COME OUT!”

Loona clicked her lighter again and Blitzo mentioned for her to hurry up.

“I’M TRYING! I’M FUCKING TRYING!”

Blitzo tossed the lighter into the drawer and a burst of flame shot up.

“THE SHREDDER IS JAMMED!” Moxxie yelled as he tried to shred a bunch of papers.

“THEN FIGURE IT OUT, MOXXIE!” cried Blitzo.

“COME OUT WITH YOUR HANDS UP!”

The imps rushed out of the office and into the hallway. They spotted the hooded guards outside, one of them looking at their watch.

Blitzo shoved them down just as a spiked ball shattered the window and burst into the hall, letting out red smoke that made them cough.

“C’mon guys,” Blitzo choked.

“Blitz, they will see us!” Moxxie cried.

“Well, we can either run or we can face the music,” Blitzo replied.

The hooded figures spotted four shadows coming out of the building.

“THERE THEY ARE!”

They hissed and let out black rope and pulled their captives.

“Uh, is this part of the job?” asked the white-haired intern imp. He and his group were tied up.

Rolando: *laughs*

The guards looked at each other and screeched. One pointed, “THERE! THE VAN!”

Blitzo carried Loona over his head. “Get. In. The. Van!” The I.M.P. members got in. “Hurry, hurry, hurry!”

Blitzo put his gold horse keychain into the slot.

“Okay, c’mon, c’mon, we got it.”

“Where are we going?” Moxxie asked.

“Anywhere but here,” Blitzo replied, turning back toward them. “Get ready for a life on the run, gang!”

He started up the van, but accidentally crashed into a pole.

Rolando: “Hahahahaha! I knew those guys were pathetic!”

“I fucking hate you so much, Blitz!” glowered Moxxie.

“FREEZE, CRIMINALS!” called the guards and the police training their guns on them.

Rolando: “Yes, yes! You guys are screwed now!”

The imps and Loona were bound by chains and captured.

Rolando: “Heheheh! The muzzle on her face! Brilliant!”

“Come on, guys!” Blitzo called. “This is…this is all just one big misunderstanding. Uh, is this about the orphans? ‘Cause they were already sick to begin with.”

“SILENCE!”

Rolando: “Whoa. So, there’s King Satan, the one who runs the courtroom. Definitely looks menacing here.”

Rolando: “See the two-headed being with the white head and the purple head? That’s my boss Queen Leviathan, the Sin of social media.”

Rolando: “Lucifer be right back in five minutes? Heheh, he’s been gone for years, I bet. Too preoccupied with those ex-humans in Pride.”

“We are here to sentence the criminal imp…Blitzo.” Satan began.

“A-actually sir, the ‘o’ is…” Blitzo began nervously.

Satan glared down at him and snorted close to his face in warning.

“Totally there!” Blitzo squeaked. “You nailed it, great job.”

Satan began. “You and your crew are on trial for stealing a powerful Goetic heirloom for undocumented personal use in the mortal realm. How do you plead?”

“N-not guilty, Your Infernal Honor,” Blitzo replied in a shaking voice. “Oh, is…is this about the book? Ha! I didn’t steal that thing! I mean, I tried, right? But since when is attempting a crime illegal? This is Hell, am I right?”

“Always,” Moxxie glared.

“Point is,” Blitzo continued. “It was given to me, okay? I was allowed to use it.”

“OBJECTION! LIES!!” bellowed Andrealphus. “Your Honor…”

Andrealphus waved his arm and slid down an icy slide with icicles underneath. “…speaking on behalf of my aggressive attractive sister…”

Asmodeus, Satan, Belphegor, and Beelzebub all raised their eyebrows in bewilderment.

Rolando: “What the actual fuck?! I know it’s Hell, but really? What kind of fucked up thoughts have you got in there, icy royal sir?!”

Andrealphus pointed at Blitzo. “…I must testify that this BRUTISH imp did indeed steal Stolas’ precious grimoire to use in the mortal realm. And Stolas himself not only let him, but also allowed Blitzo to force himself upon him!”

“HEY! I DIDN’T FORCE SHIT!” Blitzo protested before he was muted by a chain around his mouth.

Rolando: “That relationship was fucked up to begin with, to be fair.”

Andrealphus posed. “Unlike a responsible and handsome Goetic demon such as myself, Stolas was too weak and ashamed to come forward about it. To allow himself to be seduced by such a common imp, then to gleefully divorce Stella to boot…”

Andrealphus posed some more. “Oh, the travesty! The horrendous drama!”

Rolando: “UUUHHH…STOP MAKING ME HUNGRY! What I’d give for one taste of their negativity!”

Several royal members muttered.

Andrealphus strode forward and shoved Blitzo so hard that he flipped over his stone stand. “This vile hideous imp has put his kind to shame! Committing such hardened acts to GAIN THE UPPER HAND AGAINST OUR NOBLE CLASS!”

Rolando: “Not to mention illegally going up to Earth to mess up MY PLANS!”

Whispers and a few gasps echoed in the chamber.

“That isn’t what happened!” Moxxie protested, banging his fists against his stone stand.

“SILENCE!” Satan roared with a fiery snort.

“Um, Satan?” asked a small flying advisor demon, Yogirt, who flew near him.

“Sorry. W-what did we say about negative energies in our mind temple?”

Rolando: “So the great king has a meditation coach?” *scoffs.* “You can’t hide from your negativity forever.”

He folded his hands and did a meditation pose.

“Yeah, remember to take deeeeep breaths,” he told him.

Satan breathed heavily and lowered himself onto his red stone throne, doing meditative poses with his hands. “Right, yeah. Continue.” Satan waved a hand and Yogirt gave him a thumbs up.

Andrealphus cleared his throat and strolled across his magic ice bridge.

“I’d like to add, Your Honor, that in addition to his unspeakable actions with our dear beloved Stolas…”

“Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait!” called Vassago. “Where is Stolas, anyway? Can’t he speak on this himself? ¿Qué carajo?” (“What the Hell?”)

Rolando: “Vassago, the divination guy from the Ars Goetia? W-W-Why does he speak Spanish? Why is he a parrot?!”

“He…” Andrealphus began, “He has not been informed of this trial.”

“Qué?” (What?)” asked Vassago, zooming toward Andrealphus on a golden flying star. “Why not? If this involves him, then he should be here, no? No puedo creer… (I can’t believe…”) We need to summon him at once!”

“Okaaaay, Vassago!” groaned Andrealphus. “Shut the fuck up.”

Vassago angrily jabbed a finger into Andrealphus’ chest. “¡No! me voy a callar pendejo arrogante!” (“No! I will NOT shut up, you arrogant idiot!”)

Rolando: “Yes! Fight some more and let it fester!”

Andrealphus let out his feathers in anger. “Stella and I didn’t want him put through the trauma of facing his aggressor.”

Vassago stomped away.

Andrealphus smirked, “Who might I also add…dramatic pause…” He pointed at Blitzo, “…PLOTTED TO HAVE HIM ASSASSINATED!”

“What?!” muffled Blitzo. The Goetia glared down at him.

Yelps and gasps rose from the crowd.

“Puta madre…”(“Motherfucker…”) Vassago swore.

Belphegor blinked around before lowering her head and falling asleep.

Rolando: “Belphegor, the sleepy sheep who does drugs? Surprised she’s there.”

“That wasn’t him!” Moxxie countered. “We don’t know who wanted Stolas dead, but it wasn’t Blitz!”

“Oh?” Andrealphus turned around. “Well…perhaps we should ask…”

He snapped his fingers, and a platform rose up from the shadows.

“…THE HITMAN HIMSELF!”

Striker grinned menacingly, posing in a white cowboy vest, dark pants, a red undershirt and a red cowboy hat. His tail rattled and he casually spit out a straw stalk in his mouth. A white scar was over his eye from the explosive attack in Greed.

Rolando: “WAIT…THEY LITERALLY JUST CALLED STRIKER THE HITMAN! IT’S OBVIOUS THAT STRIKER WAS THE ONE HIRED TO KILL HIM! ARE THESE ROYALS STUPID?”

“…who has agreed to give us his testimony in exchange for immunity,” Andrealphus finished.

“It was him, alright,” Striker drawled. “Paid me to kill the precious Goetia to cover up what he was doing with the uhh…”

Striker looked around and read words from his hand. His hand read “Gremwhore/Grim-war/Gripper/Grimage/Book/Bombproof vet after trial.”

“The um…”

Striker looked up at Andrealphus. “Line?”

“The grimoire!”

Rolando: *chuckles*

“Yeah, that.”

“WHAT?!” Blitzo spat out the muzzle over his mouth. “Look, I’m an assassin, okay? If I wanted to kill Stolas, I WOULD’VE DONE IT MYSELF A LONG TIME AGO!”

More cries and gasps from the crowd.

Rolando: “Ooooh Blitzo! Not a good choice of words! Hahahaha!”

Moxxie cried into Millie’s arms. “We’re gonna fucking die!”

Blitzo gasped. “Hang on, that’s not what I meant…”

A metal muzzle was placed over Blitzo’s mouth.

“What a disappointment,” Satan remarked.

Satan turned to the Sins and the crowd. “Why don’t we take a vote? Who wants to listen to hours of testimony?”

Asmodeus, Vassago, and Beelzebub raised their hands, as did Millie and Moxxie. Loona reluctantly raised hers.

“Who wants to kill this imp bastard and go home for lunch?” Satan smirked.

Everyone else raised their hands.

Rolando: “Yes! Everyone agrees to I.M.P.s death! Glorious!”

Striker winked and grinned again before being lowered down, tipping his hat.

Andrealphus gave Blitzo a smug smirk. “You should’ve stayed in your place, imp.” He walked down platforms of ice. “You see, this is what happens when lesser demons try to step out of line!” He pressed his high heel into Blitzo’s forehead.

Rolando: “Ouch, that’s gotta hurt.”

Andrealphus smirked again and vanished with a wave of his cloak.

Satan glowered. “For the treacherous crimes of stealing a Goetia’s grimoire for illegal use, bringing harm to a Goetic prince, and accessing the mortal coil without clearance or procedure…”

Satan pointed a claw. “…you, Blitzo, and your crew are hereby sentenced…”

Satan stood up, “…TO DEATH!”

Blitzo and his crew gasped in horror.

Rolando: “HAHAHAHA! AT LAST, I SHALL ENJOY THE SHOW AND GET MY REVENGE! YOU’LL JOIN ME IN THIS STUPID NON-EXISTENCE VOID PLACE!”

Satan continued. “…and due to your bold actions against the laws of Hell, your execution will be broadcasted across the Seven Rings, to remind all of imp kind why our power must never be challenged again.”

Rolando: “Oooh, YES! That’s even better!”

A mother imp was washing dishes with a baby and a boy imp in the room. The TV blinked on, and the family looked over. At a bar, Verosika, Wally Wackford, Emberlynn Pinkle and several succubi were talking at a table together. Purple neon hearts decorated the walls. Three TVs blinked on, and they glanced up.

An imp family with a grandma imp knitting, two queef dogs, a guy eating popcorn and two kids in the front row sat to watch, all gasping. Three imps sat on a couch and watched: two white-haired males and a female with short black hair and thick eye lashes.

Fizzarolli was eating a bowl of cereal near a Wally Wackford “Wacky Charms” money-themed cereal box. He slurped out of a curly straw. Fizzarolli gasped. Verosika gasped as well, looking up in concern. The TV showed Blitzo chained up.

“Your Honor,” Asmodeus raised his hand. “If I may speak on behalf of the imp. Blitzo is my lover Fizzarolli’s best friend. For all the times I have known him, he has shown no dishonorable act toward me or any royalty for that matter. Stolas and I…we may be different, but we’ve worked together well in the past. We’ve had peaceful talks…unlike some around here…”

He rolled his eyes at Mammon.

Beelzebub added her thoughts, too. “I’ve known the little guy, too! He’s a wild card, but fun to hang out with! He may indulge in overdrinking, but I’ve never seen him kill or force himself on anyone!”

Satan pretended not to hear them.

Mammon flirted with Leviathan, plopping himself next to her. “Hey, Levy! After we celebrate this imp’s death, let’s go out, huh? Out on the town, what do you reckon?” He moved his fingers forward in a walking motion. The white left head smiled, while the right purple serpent head glowered, rolling her eyes. Leviathan got up and moved her chair away from Mammon, much to the disgust of her white head.

Rolando: “Ugh! Mammon’s a greedy ass! Get away from him, Leviathan!”

“At least I don’t hang out with lower class phebs, like Bee and Ozzie up there,” Mammon scoffed.

Stolas was watching his “HELLUVA NOVELA: SEASON 2” show when an ad for “Wally Wackford’s Wacky Charms” cereal appeared with a muffin and juice: “$99 only!”

“LIVE: BREAKING NEWS! GRAB LOTS OF POPCORN! CUZ ON TONIGHT’S PROGRAM WE GET TO WATCH THIS GUY’S HEAD GO CHOPPY CHOPPY! STAY TUNED!!”

Stolas spat out his Beelzejuice and coughed. “Oh, my Lucifer!” he panicked. “What are they doing?!” He raced to the courtroom as fast as he could.

Rolando: “Why can’t you use a portal or something?”

The ground rumbled and a half-circle execution block appeared in front of Blitzo. He struggled against his chains and muzzle.

“No!” Blitzo cried as two reapers appeared behind his employees.

“Not them, Your Highness!” Blitzo cried, stepping forward. “It was me, it was all me! Y-you can’t expect to teach anyone a lesson by killing all of us!”

Rolando: *scoffs* “How noble of him to give up his life for his employees. Now they’ll get to watch his demise.”

Satan stomped forward and leaned forward. “YOU DARE TRY TO TELL ME HOW TO PUNISH?!”

Rolando: “Leviathan has her own form of therapy, I think. Whenever she would get stressed out, she would take the messengers who gave her bad news for a swim…and her giant monster fish pet would gobble them up! Her weekly videos were quite popular.”

“Uh, Satan?” Yogirt pipped up again. “Heh, sorry. You know what, you’re acting kind of red with anger, yes? Deep breaths again, clear away the negative vibes. Try some meditation…realign your charkas…yes?”

Rolando: “No, don’t clear away the negative vibes. Nothing vibes like the heavy stench of fear! Eum…unless it’s my own…”

Blitzo continued. “Look, all that Hell is gonna see is you executing imps and a hellhound who are just trying to do their job!”

He glanced at them. “I’m the rogue here, not them!”

Moxxie moved out of the reaper’s grip. “Blitz, what are you doing?”

Satan sighed. “Fine. I created imp kind to be my obedient servants anyways. I see no reason to punish the dutiful.” He spoke in a low voice. “Just axe the mouthy one.”

Blitzo froze, eyes wide. “Oh shit, I did not see that coming, look, I’m sorry, Mox, I did everything I could…”

“You know he means you, right?” Moxxie asked.

Rolando: *laughs*

The reaper growled as he laid a clawed black hand on Blitzo’s shoulder. Blitzo slumped. “Fuck me.”

Rolando: “Yes, fuck you, Blitzo! Hahaha!”

The reaper removed the chain around Blitzo’s neck and steered him toward the execution block. The reapers released Moxxie and Millie and soon vanished.

“Do you have any final words, imp?” Satan asked as he sat down. “We’ll pretend to care.”

Blitzo blinked his eyes shut, tears threatening to fall. “All I was trying to do was rise above the stupid fucking place YOU ALL FORCED US INTO! Treating our kind as nothing more than dirt to stomp on! My people enduring mockery and misery for centuries…you should’ve known some of us would get tired of that shit!”

“Your Highness, please!” called Millie. “Blitz just…”

“Mox, Mils, stop,” Blitzo responded.

“We can’t let them do this to you!” Millie choked.

Blitzo looked downcast. “This big, red bitch, never planned on hearing us out. Just…”

Blitzo looked up at a sad Loona, his eyes growing wet with tears, he choked, “J-just take care of Loona for me.”

Moxxie cried, tears falling. “No! I can’t look, Millie!”

More chains manifested and latched onto a new black collar around Blitzo’s neck inscribed with the red Sin sigils. The weight forced Blitzo onto his knees. He took big shaking breaths as a menacing executioner with bloodstained black robes manifested a giant deadly black axe with red eyes on the blade. Flames glowed in the dark void of his face.

Rolando: “You’re done for, Blitzo! If you ever end up double dead here, I’ll be glad to mess with your head again. And this time, I will never let you get free!”

Moxxie cried into Millie’s arms. Blitzo slowly lowered his head onto the execution block. Loona whimpered and turned away.

The axe was raised higher. Blitzo turned his head to look at his crying friends. Millie bravely eyed Blitzo, letting him know he was not alone.

“I love you guys,” Blitzo whispered, tears in his eyes.

The axe sliced down, and everyone gasped…

Rolando: *evil laughter*

“Ow, my holy neck,” muttered Yogirt. A lone feather fell down onto Blitzo.

Blitzo looked up, stunned to see…

“STOLAS?!”

The owl prince was back, manifesting a starry tear in reality, and blocking the axe.

Rolando: *spits out popcorn* “WHAT THE FUCK?! HOW DID STOLAS GET THERE?!”

“WHAT IN MY OWN HELL IS THIS?!” Satan roared, grabbing onto Yogirt.

Stolas used his magic to break Blitzo’s chain. “I’m about to explain everything in the only way I know how…” he said with a serious look…

“…song!” He posed with a hand over his heart.

Blitzo face-palmed on the execution block.

Rolando: “OH FUCK NO! YOU’RE DELAYING MY ENEMY’S DEATH WITH A STUPID SONG?! GO BACK TO THE OTHER PART!”

Vassago stood up and clapped for Stolas in a little dance. “Yes! Yes! ¡Cántalo, baby!” (Sing it, baby!”)

Satan sat bored, releasing Yogirt.

Stolas began his song.

“I came down just as soon as I heard of the imp Stood accused of a devilish crime”

Stolas magically conjured rock stepping stones as he walked above the lava.

“Could it be that a worm such as this half a brain Could concoct such a plot so sublime?”

Blitzo glared at Stolas as he continued.

“Does this fool deserve the flame? Or is someone else to blame?”

Stolas posed with his cape obscuring his mouth like a villain. “Like who, you ask?”

Rolando: “Whoever thought that Stolas and Blitzo getting together was a good idea?”

He strolled on the cliff, waving an arm.

“Some kind of mastermind A mind behind the plan!”

He raised his arms dramatically and flames shot up. He wandered around the Ars Goetia.

“Some villain’s grand design To use the book To breach the world of man!”

Stolas raised his hand in a pose toward the cavern ceiling.

“Could he be roaming free?”

He knocked over Mammon’s block tower of naughty words.

“Scheming more mastermindery?”

Rolando: “That’s not even a word, Stolas.”

He hovered around Leviathan and moved to Asmodeus and Beelzebub.

“Will he rest? Who knows what he may unleash?”

He morphed into his red and black demonic owl form, rising into the air. He swooped over the Sins, waking up Belphegor.

He lowered and morphed back into his regular form, cupping Blitzo’s chin.

“Next, do you execute this little wretch?”

Blitzo seethed after Stolas turned around.

“Pat yourself on the back, close the case Let this imp take the blame, take the flame Let his name light a fire in the hearts of his race! Why it’s more than I can bare…”

He spun around.

“I must make all of Hell aware!”

“Fuck it!” Stolas raised a fist.

“I am the mastermind, the hand that holds the strings!”

Satan snorted and glared at Stolas. Stolas continued.

Rolando: “Stolas, just tell him why you lent the book to Blitzo…no need to sing about it! This ain’t a Disney musical!”

“No simple imp of mine could master the disaster Oh, it stings! That you thought You had caught the schemer of the schemes I wrought!”

He spun and pointed at Satan.

“I confess! It was me and I have no regrets!”

A starry universe scene played in Stolas’ mind and Blitzo’s. The owl somberly lowered his head.

Rolando: “Yuck! A love song?! That’s fucking disgusting!”

“I have regrets Why am I throwing my freedom away For this idiot?”

Blitzo glared at Stolas. “Hey!” “What have you done?”

“I would rather be dead,” Stolas proclaimed “…than to live without you by my side!”

Blitzo lamented in answer: “I can’t live life without you by my side!”

“So, if it keeps you alive!” Stolas declared.

Blitzo gasped and strained against his chains. “What are you doing?! I don’t deserve this!”

Stolas sang, “I am the mastermind, the master of my fate!”

“I realized too late!” Blitzo replied.

“Sure as the stars have shined,” sang Stolas.

Blitzo called, “Don’t give your life to clean my slate!” just as Stolas belted at the same time: “I give up my life to clean your slate!”

Stolas declared, “You’re my light!”

Blitzo choked and sobbed, “You’re my heart!”

Blitzo and Stolas lamented and sang together. “Only death can render our love apart!” Shooting stars flew overhead.

Rolando: “Then I hope both of you die!”

Satan chuckled and scoffed, bringing them back to the courtroom. Smoke flew from his mouth.

“Well, isn’t that adorable? We have been betrayed by one of our own. A Goetic demon. Your hubris has gotten the better of you, Prince Stolas.”

Satan stood up and stomped his hoof in authority, cracking the steps as he sang.

“I am the mastermind, and here I am the law!”

“He is the law!” chorused the other Sins.

Rolando: “Oh? Satan has a song, too?”

“I’ve ruled the endless dark

Since long before the golden angel’s fall…”

Rolando: “Satan’s a liar. Lucifer came first. Is he sacred of Lucifer’s power over him, I wonder? Hmmm…”

Satan conjured a light image of the six-winged Lucifer in his hand. Asmodeus and Beelzebub shared a look, knowing that Lucifer was the first ruler instead of Satan.

Rolando: “Just so you guys know, I could totally possess another Sin if Lady Leviathan granted me permission and her powers! Sadly, such a situation would be impossible.”

“So you see…”

Satan’s eyes lit up in orange-red flames.

“…next to me, your master plans look so small…”

Satan conjured explosions throughout the courtroom that shook Blitzo and Stolas.

“Little mice!”

Flames shot up in front of him. Satan leaned in and breathed menacingly, towering over Stolas and Blitzo.

“When you break my rules…”

He conjured chains that violently bound Stolas by his arms and neck. He now had a black collar with the Sin symbols on his neck. Mammon and Andrealphus grinned in triumph.

Satan finished in a long booming voice. “You…pay…the…priiiicccceee!”

Satan then sat on his throne, pointing at the imps and hellhound. “Release the pawn!”

The chain unlatched around Blitzo’s neck.

“Stolas of the Ars Goetia,” Satan growled. “YOU ARE A DISGRACE!”

Blitzo stumbled and raced over with an outstretched hand. “No! No, th…”

Blitzo grabbed onto Stolas’ red cape. “Stolas, you…you can’t! You can’t do this!”

Stolas turned away.

“Stolas, please!”

Blitzo found himself being dragged away by the guards. “GET THE FUCK OFF ME!”

He struggled from their grip. “Stolas!”

A manifested rope caught around Blitzo’s neck, dragging him back. His hands were bound in manacles.

“Fucking… use your powers! Do something!”

Rolando: “You don’t deserve him, Blitzo! You don’t deserve anybody!”

Tears spilled from Blitzo’s eyes. “STOLAS!”

Blitzo was shoved onto the ground, the chains vanishing.

“AH! LET ME BACK IN!”

The doors slammed shut, the glowing designs fading.

He pounded against the door in vain.

“WOW! This is a sturdy door!”

He punched it and waved his wrist in pain. “Ow! My supple wrist!”

Rolando: “Heh.”

Blitzo sobbed, lowering his head until Moxxie put a hand on his shoulder. “Sir! Sir!”

Blitzo turned around to find all his employees crying in relief.

Rolando: “Why did they have to ruin my moment of triumph?!”

They all embraced in a group hug.

“Dad!” Loona cried.

“You’re here!” exclaimed Moxxie.

“Don’t you ever do that to me again, you fucking idiot!” Millie added.

The four assassins let themselves be warmed by their hug, all of them thankful to be alive.

Octavia watched TV, “Hell-G Network” labeled at the bottom. To her horror, she saw Stolas somberly lower his head onto the execution block. She raced from the room, only for Stella to block her way.

Stella closed her eyes and held out her arms. Octavia rushed into her mother’s arms, sobbing with twittering bird cries. Stella rubbed her daughter’s hair…and revealed a hidden evil smirk.

Rolando: “Looks like Stella is up to no good. Poor Octavia’s in for a sinister treat! Hehehehe.”

“Uhh…what’re you doin’?” Satan asked.

“Um…” Stolas began, standing up. “I mean…aren’t you going to…you know…” He made a motion of sliding his finger across his neck, “…execute me?”

“Hah! Aw of course not! You are a Goetia.”

“But I committed a heinous crime.”

“Yeah, you did. But, you are demon royalty sooo…your life has actual worth.”

Rolando: *growls* “Those prissy royal pricks think they can do whatever they want to the lower class. Even to those middle class like me! I risked my life to go up to Earth to infest humans, and the only thanks I get is measly pay and a few online comments! How pathetic! My life is the only one worthwhile…I swear I’m surrounded by worthless scum!”

“So…” Stolas added, “Uh…” He pointed to the door. “Can I…can I go then?”

Satan burst into laughter, holding onto his knees.

“NO! Ooh, ooh. No. no. You still definitely fucked up, we just need to figure out a fitting punishment for you.” He moved his fingers together.

“Might I suggest something, Your Majesty?” Andrealphus grinned and slid over to Stolas on his ice slide. He lowered a finger and burnt away the chains binding Stolas’ arms. The reapers vanished.

“I think you should banish this shameful excuse for a prince and allow someone else to take over his legions. Considering the heir isn’t yet of age, I’d be happy to volunteer. After all, I’m everything he is, but NOT a deviant piece of shit!”

Rolando: “Oooof.”

Andrealphus sneered next to Stolas.

“Yeah, that works,” Satan replied, standing up.

“STOLAS!” Satan, announced with authority. “I HEREBY STRIP YOU OF YOUR STATUS, YOUR POWER, AND YOUR TITLE…”

Andrealphus hovered around Stolas, grinning triumphantly. “YESSS! YESSS!”

He let out a final “YESSSSS!” tearing off his coat and posing on his knees.

Rolando: *scoffs* “This guy’s a freaking nutjob!”

“…FOR THE NEXT HUNDRED YEARS!” Satan finished.

“WAIT, WHAT?!” Andrealphus asked in shock. One hundred years was only a few minutes in the long Goetia lifespan.

Satan conjured five magical giant golden rings, with the Seven Sin Sigils glowing on them in pink.

The rings lifted up Stolas, black electricity zapping around him. Stolas’ eyes turned black, and he writhed in pain. He could feel his power and energy being zapped away, all the magic sapped from his veins. The rings soon dropped him to the ground in a heap and hovered back into place, lowering out of sight. His royal hat and crown toppled away. His red cape was torn.

Stolas moaned weakly, his red eyes now having white pupils.

Satan added, “You will have to live amongst the citizens of Hell and revel in your own failings!”

Rolando: “Have fun being homeless, Stolas! Hahaha!”

“But what about my daughter?” Stolas weakly asked.

Andrealphus bore a look of haughtiness.

“She’ll be safe and sound…with her mother. The wholesome parent!”

Rolando: “Ooooh the drama and the trauma! Stella will certainly…’take care’ of her…”

“I guess that settles it!” Satan called. He cleared his throat and clapped his hands. “Court’s adjourned, time for lunch!”

Mammon cheered. “Yeah! It’s fucking lunch time!” He leaned down and stuffed his face full of green chicken legs and green meat in vats. Green liquid spilled onto the benches. Asmodeus and Beelzebub looked disgusted.

Rolando: “How gross, Mammon! Even my kills aren’t as messy…most of the time.”

Andrealphus moved his face upside-down, taunting Stolas one last time.

“Buh-bye Stolas! Enjoy horny jail!”

Rolando: “Hahahaha!”

Meanwhile, Blitzo was still pounding on the doors.

“YOU! UH-UGH, YOU OPEN THIS DOOR RIGHT-AHH!”

Blitzo was shoved away as the doors opened. Two reapers carried the limp Stolas and tossed him roughly to the ground. The doors slammed shut. The light from the setting sun peered through the windows and banners with the Sin symbols lined the hall.

“Stolas?” Blitzo asked, concerned, trying to help him up. “What happened in there?”

Stolas sat up. “I…have been banish-ed…”

A cup of coffee hit Stolas on the head. An imp janitor had thrown it and was flipping Stolas off near his cleaning supplies.

“You suck, Stolas!”

Blitzo flipped him back. “Hey! Fuck off, fuck-o!”

Rolando: “Blitzo never gets tired of swearing.”

Stolas shrugged, standing up. “No, it’s fine, Blitz. I’m okay.”

“You need a ride home,” Blitzo noted.

Stolas stared at the floor, trying not to cry. “I…have no home now. Everything I have is gone.” Everyone looked up at him sadly.

Rolando: “Well, you’re screwed, Stolas!”

Blitzo stepped forward. “Look, come with me, alright? Let’s get you out of here, n’ you’ll need a place to stay.” He gently took Stolas’ hand and led him out of the hall. The others followed.

“Yeaaah, let’s not do that again,” Millie remarked once they got outside. Millie and Moxxie got into an old yellow taxi. Moxxie somberly waved goodbye from the window.

Blitzo couldn’t believe what he saw next. Imps were cheering from the apartment windows. A banner read “WE LOVE BLITZ!”

Rolando: *seethes* “What madness! Blitzo is not a hero! He’s a red nosy little jerk who thinks he can get involved in the jobs of other killers!”

Blitzo waved self-consciously.

“Ah, Thank you everyone! Thank you. Gracias.”

A few imps booed and threw food at Stolas. He was dumped in green slime.

Rolando: “Hahahaha!”

Blitzo glanced over. “But-okay-the-throwing? Not necessary, heh, ‘kay? Thank you.”

Loona flicked on the lights in Blitzo’s apartment, also holding Blitzo’s golden horse key.

Blitzo led Stolas in and closed the door. A wooden “Welcome” sign was over the door.

Stolas’ head hit a black ceiling fan, and he nudged it back in place. Red light peered through the blinds near an old TV by the couch. A potted plant was next to the TV.

Loona placed the keys on the table and turned to Blitzo.

“Hey, um. I’m so glad you’re okay.”

They shared a warm hug.

“I love you, dad.” Loona smiled.

Stolas stood with a somber look.

“Come on,” Blitzo said to Stolas after the hug from Loona. “Let’s get you cleaned up.”

 Stolas sat in the bath and let Blitzo wash his feathery back with a washcloth.

“Here we go, here we go,” Blitzo smiled. Stolas flapped his lips.

“Here you are,” said Blitzo, washing along Stolas’ head. “Some nice agua.”

Rolando: “I hope this isn’t going too far if you know what I mean…”

Blitzo heard a knock on the door. He got up. Loona came in and with a small smile, had a folded sweater for Stolas in her hands. It was a white and red sweater with a red paw print on it. Blitzo gave her an appreciative smile.

Blitzo glanced behind him and pulled Stolas’ head out of the water.

“Oop! Try not to inhale the water.”

Rolando: “So depressed, he’s trying to drown himself! Heheheh.”

Blitzo closed the door. Then he opened it again to check on Stolas.

“Yeah, try not inhaling the water.”

He closed the door again.

Stolas let out a long, depressed sigh.

Rolando: “Oh I wish I could taste some of that, dammit!”

Blitzo smiled as he looked at his phone.

“INFERNAL NEWS: VICTORY FOR I.M.P.!”

Blitzo swiped to the right and to his delight, he had almost a hundred new emails. Demons right and left were looking up to him, asking him about getting hired at I.M.P.!

Rolando: “No, we don’t need any more I.M.P. minions. They call themselves assassins! Pathetic!”

Blitzo looked up as Stolas came out of the bathroom. He slouched forward, a brown towel falling off his head. He wore Loona’s sweater. Blitzo took his hands and helped him sit on the couch.

“Thank you, Blitz,” Stolas said sadly.

“Thank you, Stolas,” Blitzo added, looking away for a moment. “For saving my life.”

“Always,” Stolas answered, exhausted.

“Hey, Stolas, I…” he began. But Stolas was already fast asleep.

Blitzo kissed Stolas on the cheek and stared happily at the fireworks.

Rolando: “Yeah, enjoy your celebration for now, Blitzo. But soon enough, you’ll get what’s coming to you!”

Rolando: “Well that’s the end of that episode. Can’t believe I was this close to revenge! All they had to do was cut Blitzo out of existence, but some featherbrain had to save the day. *growls* Maybe next time?”

Rolando: “Say, did you like our meat snack, mortal? Good, wasn’t it? Wanna know what it was? Nope, not chicken. Not beef. Pork? No, but you’re getting close!”

Rolando: “Let’s just say my special meat you had was…quite personal…”

*Takes a leftover human finger and pops it into his mouth*

*Laughs evilly*