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summerwritesfics · 1 month ago

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🧙🏼‍♂️Seduction Places Me In Line, Revealed To A Submissive Side

Pairing: Hanzo Hasashi/Kuai Liang Length: 10043 Words Rating: Explicit 🔞 Warnings: Wizard AU, Wizard!Kuai Liang, Knight!Hanzo Hasashi, BDSM, Dom/sub, Dom Kuai Liang, Top Kuai Liang, Bottom Kuai Liang, Bottom Hanzo Hasashi, Top Hanzo Hasashi, Basically Top/Bottom switches up at points but Kuai’s still in charge (this is the last time I’m ever writing Top!Kuai btw), Anal Sex, Anal Fingering, Anal Training, Spanking, First Time Bottoming, First Time Blow Jobs, Dildos, Ice Dildos, Inappropriate use of cryomancy, Riding, Multiple Orgasms, Degradation, Praise Kink

We Are Entranced, Spellbound Masterlist

Notes: I wrote this earlier in the year and just never got around to editing until now. It feels like forever since I posted smut (even tho it wasn’t really lmao). I will be honest, I got extremely burnt out on writing smut when I did Kinktober back in 2022, and I’ve not really been able to bounce back since. But, I’m still trying to get back into it, I guess need to re-build my confidence lmao. Like the tags say, this is the last time I’m going to be writing Top!Kuai (and by extension Bottom!Hanzo) 😬 I know I’ve only written it like… 3 times including this but I’ve been doing a lot of soul searching since I wrote this, and realised the dynamic really doesn’t spark joy for me so I’m taking Marie Kondo’s advice. But, figured I’d still offer this one final fic before I completely bow tf out of that particular race. Honestly I’m mainly posting this because I do wanna write more in this particular AU and this… Kinda sets everything up for it. 😂 Just know that in future instalments Kuai is gonna fall into a power bottom dom role, rather than doing any more topping. :) Title is from She Dominates by Blitzkid.

Hanzo stared at the old stone house in front of him. The feeling of dread looming over him was almost enough to make him turn around and leave. But he knew he needed to do this. He needed to both tell the occupant the truth, admitting to his own sins, and hope that the wronged party would have it in him to forgive and aid him in his quest for justice.

He came to the doors, lifting the surprisingly heavy bronze knockers. He slammed it down, listening to the way it echoed slightly. There was silence for a few seconds, but then he heard a strange scraping. The door didn’t budge, but a flap up the top opened, although he couldn’t see any eyes peering out at him.

“If you are one of Lord Shinnok’s guards,” a voice on the other side of the door warned in a low tone, “I would suggest turning and fleeing, before I turn you into ice cubes.”

“I’m not of Lord Shinnok’s guard,” Hanzo assured, although he couldn’t help but look down at his feet in shame. “At least not any more.”

When he looked back up, he finally found a pair of eyes in the peephole, glaring at him. Clearly, he’d recognised Hanzo’s voice. And given the venom in his eyes, he wasn’t exactly happy about the visitor on his doorstep.

“Hanzo Hasashi,” the voice growled, eyes narrowing at him. “You have some nerve showing up here.”

“I realise I have no right to be in your presence, Kuai Liang,” he started, bowing slightly to show submission and respect. “But I have something important to discuss with you.”

Hanzo watched as the flap slammed shut, and he almost thought Kuai was outright rejecting even so much as a conversation. That was dismissed when he heard what sounded like bolts being undone. And then the door opened, revealing the man in question.

He’d aged somewhat since the last time Hanzo had seen him, the beard was definitely new. Actually Hanzo had forgotten just how short Kuai Liang actually was, he only just about came up to Hanzo’s chin. And yet, even with that, just the look on his face told Hanzo if he wasn’t careful, Kuai would still make good on his ice cube threat.

“Speak,” Kuai spat, leaning against the doorframe, and looking at Hanzo like he wanted this to be done as quickly as possible.

“I understand that you are angry, and you have every right to be.” He tried to keep eye contact, hoping that would make him seem sincere in his words. “I killed your brother under the belief he was the one responsible for the deaths of my wife and son. I would not wish to see me either, if I was you.”

Kuai was silent, but his mouth was tight, like he’d picked up on something and didn’t particularly like it. “What exactly do you mean by ‘under the belief’?”

Hanzo couldn’t help but flinch, as he explained “I have recently discovered that the true assailant of my family was Quan Chi, not Bi-Han.”

“So he was innocent?” Kuai questioned, pushing himself off the doorframe. If Hanzo was honest, he was fully expecting Kuai to punch him in the face. “I was right all along. Bi-Han was innocent.”

“I thought you deserved to know the truth,” Hanzo shamefully admitted, and he was surprised by how Kuai didn’t attack him. It was clear he wanted to.

“Is that all?” Kuai asked, grabbing the door clearly with the intent of slamming it in Hanzo’s face.

“No. I-” He took a deep breath, knowing what was about to come from his mouth next would not be taken well. “I need your help.”

Kuai's immediate reaction was to laugh. It was a deep sarcastic bellow that indicated he didn’t believe what he’d just heard. He stopped suddenly, staring at Hanzo with an expression he could only describe as manic.

“Oh? You’re serious, aren’t you?” Kuai stepped forward, getting in Hanzo’s face as best he could. Hanzo had to give it to him, he was extremely intimidating when he wanted to be. “In what world would I ever help you?”

“In one where Quan Chi was also the orchestrator of Bi-Han’s death.” He knew that it was risky to point that out, but it was the only way he could think to maybe persuade Kuai Liang. “He manipulated me into believing Bi-Han was responsible, his plan all along was for your brother’s demise. If it had not been me, it would have been another.”

“And what, pray tell, do you exactly need my assistance for?” Kuai finally pulled away from him. He clearly was still unhappy, but seemed to concede at the very least Quan Chi was the cause of both their misery.

“As you know Quan Chi is a powerful wizard. I could not hope to defeat him on my own.”

“So you need an equally powerful wizard to help take him down, is that it?” Kuai Liang asked, looking at his nails as if he was bored.

“Please.” Hanzo attempted to get down on one knee to try and show his submission. “You are the only person I can turn to.”

“Hm. I’m sure I am,” Kuai commented, tone uncaring but not cold. Hanzo looked up, but he had a sinking feeling Kuai was going to make this difficult. “I’ll be honest, I’m not particularly inclined to help you, but the fact you are apparently desperate enough to both come begging at my doorstep and act so god damn pathetic about it is extremely amusing.” Kuai placed his hands on his hips, bending down slightly. “So I’ll throw you a bone, of sorts. You may stay and continue your attempts to convince me.” He stood back up straight, looking down at Hanzo with contempt. “At best, you might actually manage to persuade me to assist, at worst, you’ll make a fool of yourself and I will get some entertainment out of it.”

“Thank you,” Hanzo whispered although he wasn’t entirely sure this was something to be grateful for. At the very least, he had a chance at pleading his case to Kuai. If he’s actually going to listen, and not doing this just to humiliate me.

He stood back up, and Kuai moved aside slightly to let Hanzo inside. Now all Hanzo had to do was figure out a way to actually get Kuai to agree.

Hanzo’s attempts to convince Kuai to help him were going poorly, to put it lightly.

Initially, he’d just been attempting to reason with him, being met with short sarcastic answers. Kuai wasn’t biting, it seemed. It would absolutely take more than words to convince him.

And so Hanzo had begun trying to help in little ways. The keyword being trying. First, he’d tried to reorganise Kuai’s potion shelf, only to accidentally knock an entire line of them over, causing them to cascade onto the floor and break. Then, he decided to try something he wouldn’t break as easily, so he went for Kuai’s bookshelf instead. Only to find a couple of the books were somehow alive, and Kuai had to swoop in and save him from being eaten.

And now he was trying to aid Kuai with brewing potions. So he’d gathered what ingredients he thought the recipe asked for. Well, he must have gone wrong somewhere, because next thing he knew, the caldron was exploding, leaving a rather impressive hole in Kuai’s floor.

“Hanzo, my dear,” Kuai began as he temporarily patched up the hole with some ice. He placed his hands on his hips once he was done, and turned to Hanzo. “I do understand that you are trying to be helpful, but I have to be honest, you are really starting to piss me off.”

“Then tell me what I can do for you Kuai Liang,” Hanzo replied, resisting the urge to grab onto Kuai’s shoulders as he did. “I needyour help, and I swear I am willing to do anything to get it.”

Kuai raised an eyebrow as he questioned “anything?”

“Anything,” Hanzo reiterated, although he wasn’t too hopeful given the way Kuai Liang silently regarded him with a blank expression.

“You do realise that is a very dangerous thing to offer, don’t you?” Kuai questioned, his eyes narrowing as if to challenge Hanzo’s resolve. It was a dangerous thing to offer, yes, but it was an offer Hanzo was willing to make.

“I do, and I still mean anything.” He took a step forward, hoping to prove his intention. “I would wait on you hand and foot, you could use me as a guinea pig for your potions. God you could even fuck me if you really wanted. I mean anything.”

Kuai’s eyebrows practically shot to the top of his head as he questioned “where did that last bit come from?”

“Um…” Hanzo actually wasn’t sure, it just felt like the sort of thing that’d come up when someone questioned if someone meant anything. “Isn’t that usually where these sorts of conversations go?”

“I think that’s just your mind being in the gutter, Hasashi.” Kuai crossed his arms over his chest, slowly approaching Hanzo. “If I didn’t know better, I’d almost think that wanting to fuck me was the real reason you came here.”

Hanzo choked on his own spit a little, feeling his face heating up at the insinuation. He probably didn’t help his position by loudly protesting “that’s not what I’m here for!”

Kuai just hummed, in a way that indicated he didn’t believe him in the slightest. His entire air was one of smugness and knowing he currently had the upper hand in whatever happened here. Hanzo had just accidentally given him complete control of the situation, and he was starting to think that might have been a horrible mistake.

“Very well, let’s make a deal,” Kuai began uncrossing his arms and walking over to Hanzo. “I will help you, on the condition that I get to fuck you, as you so helpfully suggested.” The look on Kuai Liang’s face told Hanzo he was absolutely calling Hanzo’s bluff. He didn’t believe Hanzo would truly go that far, but was willing to capitalise on it if he did go through with it. “Although I will warn you that my previous sexual partners have very much described me as insatiable, and if you agree I believe you have no idea what you are letting yourself in for.”

Kuai was trying to put him off, it was clear to see, but Hanzo refused to let himself be intimidated.

“I accept your conditions,” Hanzo said confidently, keeping his head held high. He watched as Kuai’s face briefly showed a second of surprise, before resettling onto a smug look, although this time, it was much darker.

“Well then.” Kuai grabbed Hanzo’s arm, and began to guide him towards the door to his quarters. “There is no time like the present, is there. Let’s get started.”

Hanzo felt sure in his resolve. After all, it’s just sex right? As long as nothing happened that would make him question his entire relationship with sexual intercourse, he’d be fine.

Right?

“Let me get one thing clear, Hanzo,” Kuai stated as he began to pour himself a glass of red wine. “I am in control tonight, you will obey my requests without question.” He topped off his wine, leaning back in his chair and glancing Hanzo up and down. “Do you understand?”

“Yes,” Hanzo agreed, trying to not squirm under how intense Kuai’s gaze was.

“I believe you mean, yes Sir,” Kuai corrected, a smirk crossing over his face that made him look so ridiculously handsome that it made Hanzo want to scream.

“Yes Sir.” Hanzo shuffled slightly, straightening himself out for some reason.

“Good.” Kuai took a long sip of his wine, and once he pulled the glass from his lips he began to swirl the liquid that still remained. “Now. Strip.”

Hanzo didn’t have to be asked twice. He pulled up his shirt, revealing his toned chest, and desperately hoping that the cool air would distract him from how hot his face was becoming. He unhooked his belt, throwing it aside before hooking his thumbs into the hem of his trousers and pulling them down. He kicked them away, now in nothing but his undergarments. He knew Kuai would want them gone too, so why Hanzo paused on the spot like he had no idea what to do next was a bit of a mystery to him.

“All of it,” Kuai ordered, voice almost impatient. He took another mouthful of wine, likely to keep himself from saying anything more.

Even so, Hanzo grabbed his underwear and closed his eyes as he yanked them down. He wasn’t sure why, maybe he just didn’t want to see what Kuai’s initial reaction to seeing his dick was. After a couple of seconds he opened them, just in time to watch Kuai licking his lips.

“I can work with this,” Kuai hummed in approval, before holding up a single finger and making a spinning motion with it. “Let me see you.”

Hanzo held his breath as he awkwardly did a full turn. When his back was to Kuai, he heard a low whistle from the other man. He knew Kuai was pushing his luck to try and get Hanzo to admit he hadn’t thought this all the way through. Hanzo was stubborn, he’d agreed to this, letting Kuai do whatever he wanted.

And at this point, he was curious just what Kuai had in mind.

Once he was facing Kuai again, the other man was lent to one side, using his hand to prop his head up. He’d put his wine down on a table next to him for now, the hand that had been holding it at his own crotch, rubbing and pushing down against it.

“So, do tell me,” Kuai started with a groan, “have you ever been fucked before?”

“Yes, Sir, I have had sex before.”

Kuai released his crotch and held up a single finger again, this time waggling it back and forth.

“No, that’s not what I asked, love,” Kuai said in a tone that was somehow a mix between sing-song and threatening. “I asked have you ever been fucked before?”

Hanzo swallowed, now understanding Kuai’s real meaning. He wasn’t questioning if Hanzo had ever had sex before. He was questioning if Hanzo had ever bottomed before. Of which, there was only one answer…

“No, Sir, I have not.” He looked away as he said that, not because he was particularly embarrassed by it, but because he realised that Kuai might have been right. He had no idea what he was letting himself in for. He was so woefully unprepared to be in this position.

“Well then.” Kuai pushed himself to sit up straight, leaning forward and grinning wide. “I guess I’ll have to train you to be able to take cock then, won't I?”

Hanzo couldn’t believe how much of an effect that one sentence had on him. He felt a shudder down his spine and a fire in his gut, his cock almost twitching in interest at the thought. He’d never believed he would enjoy being submissive in the bedroom, but now he was starting to wonder if he’d been wrong. And Kuai clearly knew the effect he was having, and was revelling in it.

“Come here,” Kuai ordered, sitting back again and gently patting his lap.

Hanzo began to approach, and when he was close enough, Kuai grabbed his hands. He allowed Kuai to move him and position him as he wished, and soon enough he found himself lying across Kuai’s lap, ass up in the air and his slowly hardening cock pressing against Kuai’s thigh. Kuai’s hand was on his ass, fingers pressing in as he groped at the muscle and Hanzo had to suppress a moan.

And then, suddenly, Kuai swatted his hand against Hanzo’s ass.

Hanzo yelped and jolted, doing his best to twist and glare at Kuai in the hopes for an explanation.

“You tried to lie to me, so you need to be disciplined.” Kuai’s answer didn’t help, so Kuai rolled his eyes slightly before adding “you tried to escape my question about if you’d ever been fucked before.”

He brought his hand down again, making Hanzo groan. “I- I didn’t-”

“You did.” The hand came down again, and once more, Hanzo felt that heat begin to build inside him. “Please stop lying to me.”

“S-Sorry Sir,” Hanzo breathed out as he felt another slap connect with his ass. He could feel his cock growing hard between his stomach and Kuai’s thigh. He couldn’t believe this was actually turning him on. “I- I just misunderstood the question.”

Kuai hummed in vague interest, slapping a couple more times, before stating “I will show you some mercy for now.” His hand began to rub Hanzo’s ass in circles, kneading the flesh as if to soothe it. “Just try not to lie again. I don’t appreciate it.”

“Yes Sir,” Hanzo sighed in relief, although he couldn’t believe that internally his mind was screaming for more. He actually debated doing something that could provoke Kuai into starting the spanking again.

Until he felt a finger trace down his crack, and then rubbing around the rim of his hole.

Hanzo gasped at the sensation, just the single digit probing at him, almost threatening to breach him but not actually doing so.

“So tight, you really are untouched, aren’t you?” Kuai commented, his other hand coming to part Hanzo’s cheeks slightly. “Lucky me, getting to be the first one to take you.”

Hanzo almost whined in protest when Kuai took away his finger. He tried to look over his shoulder, to find Kuai grabbing what looked like a vial of oil. He used his thumb to pop open the lid, before slowly pouring the liquid between Hanzo’s cheeks. As Hanzo felt it trickle down and over his hole, Kuai’s finger was there, rubbing around the rim again, smearing the oil all over.

“Relax,” Kuai told him, as he began to press his finger inside. Hanzo gasped, and admittedly did the complete opposite of what he was ordered, clenching up. Kuai sighed, pausing his action and bringing his other hand to press down on Hanzo’s shoulder blades. “I need you to relax, it’ll be less uncomfortable for you if you do. Trust me.”

The words trust me sounded like they came from many personal experiences. Hanzo had no doubt about that. Taking a deep breath, he tried to let himself relax, doing his best to at the very least stop clenching. This seemed to be what Kuai was looking for, as Hanzo felt that finger start to push inside him again. As strange as the sensation was, he tried to stay as neutral as possible, even as he felt it go deeper. Soon he felt Kuai’s knuckles brush against his ass, telling him the finger was as deep as it could go.

Honestly, Hanzo wasn’t sure what he felt right now. It was weird, definitely not like what he expected, but not terrible. Then the thought occurred that this was just one finger, and his hole was clinging to it so tightly. How the fuck is a cock ever supposed to fit in there?

He felt Kuai pull the finger back slightly, before pressing back inside. Again, Hanzo couldn’t quite figure out what he thought. He was just going to have to keep going and see what happened. Kuai began to pump the finger in and out, deliberately trying to coat Hanzo’s inner walls with as much oil as he could. The point of his actions didn’t seem to be pleasure but preparation.

And then Hanzo felt a second finger pressing against the rim.

As he felt the tip pop inside, he couldn’t escape the loud moan at the way it began to stretch his hole. As it joined the first finger, he began to feel them both worm their way inside him, his walls struggling to accommodate him. He could feel himself trembling, his cock rock hard against Kuai Liang’s thigh.

“Oh my,” Kuai purred, twisting his fingers as he drove them deeper. “This wrecked from just two fingers? You’re going to be a complete mess by the time I’m done with you, aren’t you?”

“I-” Hanzo couldn’t get out an answer, as he felt Kuai’s fingers brush against something inside him, and all that came from his mouth was a pathetic whine.

Kuai noticed this reaction, and his fingers were immediately searching for that spot again. It was so obvious when he found it, because every time his fingers pressed against it, Hanzo made more of those desperate noises. The fingers gently prodded at it, practically massaging that spot and turning Hanzo into a shuddering mess.

“Good to know,” Kuai said under his breath, something Hanzo didn’t understand and guessed he wasn’t supposed to hear.

He couldn’t help the noise of protest when Kuai Liang pulled his fingers out completely.

“Shh, that was just to slick you up and start stretching you out,” Kuai informed him, once more manhandling Hanzo to get up and off his lap. “I have a better idea to stretch you properly and make sure you’re ready for me.”

Kuai stood up, guiding Hanzo to around where he’d previously been standing when he stripped down. Hanzo watched as Kuai flicked his hand out, summoning magic and focusing it towards the floor. Ice began to take form on the floor. It took him an embarrassingly long time to realise what Kuai had created.

A cock. Made of ice. Standing proud on the floor.

“I… Don’t understand,” Hanzo muttered, staring at it before looking back at Kuai.

“Think of it as training wheels, if you want.” Kuai grabbed Hanzo’s chin and forced him to look back at the cock. “You are going to ride it, and every so often, I am going to increase the size, until I’m certain you can take the real thing.” That made sense Hanzo guessed, although it sounded a bit embarrassing. Kuai’s hand caressed his cheek. “It’ll feel better than going straight from a couple of fingers to a dick.”

He felt Kuai slap his ass again, before pulling him forward. Next thing Hanzo knew he felt himself being pushed down onto his knees. Kuai was down with him, placing Hanzo’s hands on his shoulders, while his own hands found Hanzo’s hips and he began to position him. Hanzo felt the cold ice press against his hole, and his fingers dug into Kuai’s skin. And then he was being pushed down, and the ice cock began to work its way inside him, stretching him more than Kuai’s fingers ever could.

“That’s it, just stay relaxed,” Kuai whispered words of encouragement, continuing to press Hanzo down.

It was cold, and caused a shiver to go up his spine as it began to press deeper than Kuai’s fingers had. He threw his head back slightly as he slipped down low enough for the majority of it to be settled within him. He looked towards Kuai, seeking guidance or assurance, something to know what the hell he was supposed to do now.

“Now use your knees to lift yourself up slightly,” he instructed, helping lift him up with the grip on his hips. Hanzo did as he was told, biting his lip as he felt the ice cock slowly leave him. Kuai stopped him when just the tip was still inside, before beginning to push him back down. “You’ll want to keep lifting yourself up and down like that.”

Kuai let go of Hanzo’s hips, clearly intending for Hanzo to try and do the work for himself now. He tried, lifting himself up ever so slightly, but slowly letting himself fall back down. It felt bizarre, having something moving inside of him, but it was absolutely getting to the point that he couldn’t deny how good it felt.

“Good,” Kuai growled in approval, before slowly peeling Hanzo’s hands off his shoulders. Hanzo whined, but found the other man pressing them back, until Hanzo was propping himself up using his arms. “Use your arms to balance yourself, but keep them behind your back.” Kuai grabbed Hanzo’s chin and teasingly ghosted his lips over Hanzo’s, as if to promise a kiss that never came. “I want to be able to see you.”

And then Kuai peeled himself away, walking back over to his chair where he sat down, picking back up his wine to be a casual voyeur to Hanzo fucking himself. Hanzo did as he had been instructed, lifting himself on his knees and leaning his weight on his arms, sliding up the cock until he reached the tip and then allowing himself to essentially fall back onto it.

He was slow at first, unsure of his actions and if he was doing the right thing, but the more he repeated the motion, the more he found himself getting into a rhythm. His ass began to relax, making it easier for the ice to go in and out. Kuai watched him intently, still sipping his wine with one hand, and the other once more palming his own crotch.

Then, as Hanzo lifted himself up, Kuai flicked his wrist. Hanzo heard a crack underneath him, and on his descent he realised the ice had gotten slightly thicker. He remembered what Kuai had said about using it to stretch him, and as his ass swallowed the ice, he took a second to try and get used to the new size.

He resisted the urge to stall for too long, aware of Kuai’s still intent gaze. Once again, he began the same actions, slowing down to try and allow himself to adjust. This time, he found getting into the rhythm a lot easier, and he was once again fucking himself down on it at a steady pace.

It continued like this for a while, Kuai would flick his wrist, increasing the size, Hanzo would slow down to get used to it, and once he did, Kuai would increase the size again, and the whole cycle would repeat. Hanzo had no idea how long it’d been. It felt to him like he’d been here for hours, just fucking himself for Kuai Liang’s amusement, but it was realistically more like minutes. All Hanzo knew was that fire in his stomach built every time the ice was buried deep inside him and his cock was now fully hard and bouncing with every movement he made.

Kuai’s eyes never left him, he watched for every reaction, every moan, every facial expression and even every time Hanzo’s cock twitched in interest. He was still fully clothed, but Hanzo could see the outline of his cock in his pants, practically begging to be set free.

Hanzo suddenly realised Kuai hadn’t increased the size of the cock in a while. Yet his interest stayed the same, like he was waiting for something to happen. It was while he was pondering this, that he let himself fall down, and as he did, the ice brushed against that same spot Kuai’s finger’s had previously been abusing. Hanzo wasn’t sure what came over him, all he knew was that the action had him practically screaming, screwing his eyes slightly shut and a realisation that his crotch had become particularly wet.

As he slid his eyes open, he looked down at himself, and with the white now painting his thighs and the floor, he realised he’d just come.

“Wonderful,” Kuai commented, and when Hanzo looked back up the other man was clapping slightly. It was then Hanzo realised that this was exactly what Kuai had been waiting for. The wine glass was empty on the table, and Kuai reached for the vial of oil once more, before pushing himself up onto his feet. “I think you deserve a reward for putting on such a good show for me.”

Hanzo wasn’t sure what the reward would be, but something about the idea made him eager for it. As Kuai reached him, he stared up in what he could only describe as need. Kuai smirked once again, reaching down to gently brush some of Hanzo’s hair from his face.

Then Hanzo was once more being rearranged. He was pulled off the ice, and then was pushed back down against the floor. He heard the previous ice being broken, before a hand was taking his wrists and pinning them above his head. Something cold encased them, and when he looked up, there was a thick layer of ice keeping them restrained. When he looked back down, Kuai was running a hand down his torso, looking over him in a way Hanzo could only describe as hungry.

“Open your legs nice and wide for me,” Kuai sweetly requested, and Hanzo tried to do as he was asked.

He was certain this was it, and Kuai was going to use him. Except Kuai was still fully dressed, and seemed to have no intent on stripping himself off just yet. Then Kuai dipped his face low, bracing his hands on Hanzo’s thighs and forcing them apart just ever so slightly wider. Hanzo had no idea what he was doing.

And then Kuai licked a stripe up Hanzo’s cock.

Hanzo gasped at the action, but it was nothing compared to the throaty moan when Kuai took his cock into his mouth and practically swallowed it whole. Hanzo didn’t have time to question it, as Kuai’s head began to bob up and down, lips and tongue trailing along his cock in a way that almost had Hanzo’s hips bucking. He’d never had a blowjob where he wasn’t the one in charge and setting the pace. Watching as his cock slid in and out of Kuai’s mouth, Kuai’s hands on his hips kept him still and unable to meet the other man's movements.

One of Kuai’s hands released its grip, lowering between his legs. He felt the fingers prod at his hole, before slowly beginning to enter him. Hanzo clenched his fists, trying to silence the sinful noises that Kuai was forcing out from the back of his throat. The fingers immediately sought out that one spot again, and when they pressed down against it, Hanzo trembled at the way it made him feel.

He didn’t dare move, aside from arching his back as Kuai’s fingers rolled in circles, practically massaging the spot, while Kuai’s tongue swirled around the head of his cock. The double stimulation was maddening, especially just how skilled Kuai was with both his hand and mouth. He could feel himself begin to reach a peak, and he knew he was close to another orgasm.

“Kuai- Sir- I’m going to-“ He was cut off by Kuai Liang giving a particularly hard suck, knowing what Hanzo was about to say and doubling his efforts to make it happen. Hanzo barely had time to contemplate that before he was loudly groaning, and coming inside Kuai’s mouth.

Kuai kept suckling at him, almost like he was trying to milk Hanzo dry, before finally pulling his fingers free and letting go of Hanzo’s cock with a wet pop. Hanzo watched as Kuai sat up straight, opening his mouth and sticking his tongue out, letting him see his cum pooling on it. Then Kuai closed it, audibly swallowing, before the pink muscle popped out from between his lips again to show the white substance was now gone.

Fuck. That was one of the hottest things Hanzo had ever seen in his life.

Still he couldn’t think that all this was a bit of a tease. He needed Kuai to fuck him before he completely lost it.

“Please,” he croaked, his voice sounding hoarse. “Please, I need you to-” He cut himself off. He couldn’t say it, the words died on his tongue.

“Need me to what?” Kuai questioned, tilting his head slightly. Hanzo just groaned in response, causing Kuai to chuckle. “I can’t do anything without knowing what you need, Hanzo.”

Hanzo screwed his eyes shut, swallowing his pride as he whispered “I- I need you to fuck me.”

“Hmm, so desperate for it, aren’t you?” Kuai teased, pure delight all over his face at just how needy he’d made Hanzo. He ran his hands up Hanzo’s thighs, making him squirm with want. “Well, since you asked so nicely…”

Kuai reached for his clothes, slowly pulling it away from his body, piece by piece. But gods, he was being so slow about it. Like he was deliberately taking his time just to wind Hanzo up some more. Eventually he was free of his shirt, and then his hands were hooking into his trousers and pulling them down. As they came down his thighs, they were down enough for his cock to spring free. Hanzo couldn’t help the sharp intake of breath at the sight of it, hard, precum beading at the tip. The thought that it was going to soon be inside him was more exhilarating than he could have ever imagined.

Once free of his clothes, Kuai slotted himself between Hanzo’s legs, hands taking hold of his thighs again and pushing them even further apart. Hanzo felt Kuai’s cock between his legs, rubbing up and down against his hole. Threatening to penetrate but not actually doing so. Teasing him. Fuck. What is it with Kuai Liang and teasing me?

“Please,” he whined pathetically, twisting in his bonds, desperately trying to get Kuai inside him.

Kuai just once more laughed at him, one hand moving to grab Hanzo’s hips, once more keeping him still. With the other hand, he grabbed his own cock, gently stroking it a couple of times. He then used the grip to angle it just right, right against Hanzo’s hole, and begin to push inside.

“Yes,” Hanzo groaned, as he felt Kuai’s cock finally breach him. He still felt a stretch, evidentially Kuai had still wanted his own cock to do some of the work in that respect, but it didn’t hurt. In fact, how full he felt was wonderful.

“Ah, perfect,” Kuai growled as he bottomed out, hands digging into the flesh of Hanzo’s hips. “So perfect. You were made for me, weren’t you?”

Hanzo didn’t get a chance to reply, as Kuai swiftly pulled back before driving straight back into him. Kuai thrust a couple more times, changing his aim slightly with every movement. Hanzo groaned lightly, but then Kuai’s cock drove into that same damned spot that had previously driven him to orgasm, and he was practically mewling. Kuai had found what he wanted, and Hanzo knew the man was going to abuse it without mercy.

Kuai gave a hard thrust as if to make sure, Hanzo practically jolted at the wave of pleasure that came over him. And after that, it was like the floodgates opened. Kuai began to roll his hips, forcing his cock in and out of Hanzo’s hole with purpose. He didn’t even slowly build up his speed, just went straight into overdrive, fucking Hanzo hard and fast. With every thrust forward, Hanzo’s entire body was shoved, his cock, somehow growing hard again and aching for attention.

“Feels good, right?” Kuai managed to growl out between his own laboured breaths, moaning himself with every thrust he made. “You feel so fucking good around me, Hanzo.” Hanzo could feel Kuai’s fingernails digging into his hips. “Can’t believe no one else fucked this hole before me, it’s so god damn perfect.”

Hanzo couldn’t even think about speaking, all he could do was cry out like a whore as Kuai used him. He focused on the sensation of his hole giving way for Kuai’s cock, the way his toes curled from the pure pleasure he was feeling. How the fuck could he ever have sex with any other person, knowing this was how good it could feel with Kuai Liang?

He choked on spit, realising he was going to cum yet again.

“G-going to-“

“Are you going to come again?” Kuai asked, somehow thrusting even faster at the idea. “Go on then, come for me.”

God, why was it like that was a command that his body felt it had to instantly obey? Hanzo’s back arched completely off the floor, eyes screwed shut and tears in the corners of his eyes as he felt his own cum shoot all over his chest. Kuai Liang paused, burying himself as deep as he could, groaning at the way Hanzo clenched around him. He reached a hand forward, drawing a finger through the cum pooled on Hanzo’s chest, just playing with it, smearing it further across Hanzo’s skin.

“You are coming a lot, aren’t you?” Kuai taunted, taking a small amount of Hanzo’s cum on one of his fingers, and bringing it to his lips to lap it off. “I’d almost think you’re really enjoying yourself.” All Hanzo could do was make a small moan of agreement. “Do you like me using you, Hanzo? Do you like taking my cock like a good little whore?”

“Yes,” Hanzo whispered, causing Kuai to bark out a laugh.

“Welcome to my world,” Kuai chuckled, and started to rock his hips again. “I’m usually the one in your position, though how the fuck could I resist a hole this good?” Kuai dragged his nails lightly down Hanzo’s sides, and once more took a bruising grip on his hips. “Should I cum inside you? Fill you right up?”

“Yes!” Hanzo was shocked at his own eagerness, even as he continued to beg “please cum in me!”

“As you wish~”

Kuai picked up the pace, chasing his own pleasure now. It didn’t take too long for his movements to become erratic, and the next thing Hanzo knew he felt Kuai pressing in as deep as he could go, and then he felt his walls being painted with Kuai’s seed. Kuai thrust a couple more times, emptying himself completely within Hanzo, before finally retreating.

Hanzo lay there, panting and desperately trying to get air back into his lungs. And it was as he was lying there, believing he was truly spent, that he realised his cock was growing hard again. Or… Had it ever gone soft in the first place? He usually had a high drive, and could usually last a couple of rounds, but never like this.

Next thing he knew, Kuai was kneeling beside him, breaking the restraints and sitting him up. Hanzo felt a glass being pressed to his lips, and he greedily began to gulp down the water he was offered.

“We aren’t done, by the way,” Kuai casually informed him, and Hanzo almost choked on the water from how blunt it was. “I just thought you’d appreciate a water break.”

Hanzo pushed the glass away, swallowing what was in his mouth before asking “you still want to go?”

It dawned on him how hypocritical that question sounded when his own cock was lying at full mast between his legs.

“I warned you I was insatiable.” Kuai took a swig of the water himself, before offering it to Hanzo again. “And I have only cum once, in comparison to how many times you have.”

Hanzo huffed, but accepted the water again. He hadn’t realised how thirsty he’d been.

“Of course, we can stop, if you really want to,” Kuai drawled sarcastically, like he already knew the answer.

“No,” Hanzo complained immediately, giving Kuai the answer he expected. “No, I want to continue.”

Kuai gave a triumphant smile at that, drinking what little remained of the water and sliding the glass away off the floor.

“Well then, let’s get back to it.” Kuai held out his hand, and in front of them another cock made from ice materialised. He lent in close to Hanzo’s ear and whispered “I think you know what to do by now.”

“Yes Sir,” Hanzo replied, crawling over to the ice. He shifted so he was knelt above it, trying to line it up with his hole. He felt the cold catch against his rim, and then he was pressing himself down on it.

As he settled, Kuai walked around in front of him, leisurely stroking his cock as he did. He reached a hand forward, tangling his fingers through Hanzo’s hair, and it took everything in Hanzo not to nuzzle into the touch.

“So, tell me Hanzo,” Kuai started, gently patting his cock against Hanzo’s face. “Have you ever sucked a man off before?”

“No Sir,” he replied, trying to ignore how embarrassed he felt by that. After Kuai’s outstanding efforts earlier, he knew he had no hope of matching that.

“I guess I’ll have to teach you that too.” Kuai moved his thumb down to Hanzo’s lips, pressing down on them. “Open wide, try to keep your teeth out of the way.”

Hanzo opened as wide as he could, extremely conscious of his teeth as Kuai began to slide inside him. He wasn’t entirely sure what he was expecting dick to taste like, but it was a little underwhelming, if he was honest. It just sort of tasted like skin.

“Good,” Kuai commented, resting a hand on top of Hanzo’s head. “Now, start to move your head back and forth.”

Hanzo tried to do so, clamping his lips around the length and slowly pulling back. His eyes flicked up to Kuai, trying to read his expression as he began forward again. He misjudged how much of Kuai he could take, as the tip of the other man's cock hit the back of his throat and he immediately gagged. Kuai had taken his entire length with such little effort, he hadn’t expected it to be so hard.

“Easy.” Kuai used his hand to pull Hanzo back to a more comfortable length. “I know I made deepthroating look simple earlier, but you have to have sucked a lot of dicks to get to that level.” He winked slightly and Hanzo couldn’t help but widen his eyes at how readily Kuai could admit his sexual history. “Just take what you can, no need to rush.”

Kuai used his grip on Hanzo’s head to help show him how to move. As Hanzo’s body swayed back and forth, he felt the ice cock begin to slide in and out of him slightly. Not enough to really get him off, but enough to make him desperately want to fuck himself on it again. But right now, he wanted to focus on Kuai Liang, and doing enough of a good job to please him.

“That’s it, you’re a natural,” Kuai groaned, lightly thrusting his hips to meet Hanzo’s face as he drew forward. “Try to use your tongue a bit.”

Hanzo wasn’t entirely sure how, but he pressed his tongue upwards against Kuai’s cock and let it trail along the length. The throaty moan and way Kuai’s fingers tangled in his hair indicated this was the correct action.

“God, yes, so good.” Despite Kuai’s insistence, Hanzo wasn’t entirely sure he was really doing good enough.

He attempted to push forward more, wanting so badly to be able to take Kuai to the hilt, but then it hit his throat and once again he found himself gagging. Kuai sighed, pulling Hanzo off him completely. Hanzo looked up at him pitifully, his own saliva dripping down his chin, as Kuai’s cock hung tantalisingly in front of his face.

“I understand you are trying to please me, but you need to listen to what I’m telling you.” Kuai lightly rubbed his cock at Hanzo’s lips, and Hanzo couldn’t help but mouth at the tip. “You won’t take it all in, not on your first time. Your gag reflex will always kick in. Just take in what you can, it’s what you do with your lips and tongue that matter far more than how deep you go. Do you understand?”

“Yes Sir,” Hanzo replied, pressing a kiss on the head of Kuai’s dick.

“Good.” He held the base of his cock, patting it against Hanzo’s lips a couple of times. “Open up.”

As soon as his mouth was open, Kuai was pressing back in, and Hanzo took his advice, forgoing his attempts to take Kuai whole and focusing instead on his movements. He made sure to purse his lips, using his tongue to lap at and trail along the flesh. He sucked hard on the tip, before making his way back up the length, revelling in the taste of precum building on his tongue.

“There we go,” Kuai moaned. “That’s it, just a little more.”

Hanzo doubled his efforts, sucking on the cock like his life depended on it. He was moaning himself now, the ice cock nestled inside him still rocking with his movements. His own cock was neglected right now, but god he felt it sway between his legs.

Kuai suddenly held Hanzo’s head still, and seconds later Hanzo could taste salt, as something thick began to fill his mouth. Kuai thrust a few more times, before pulling out, and leaving Hanzo with his cum.

Kuai cupped Hanzo’s cheek, and whispered “swallow.”

Hanzo rolled the cum around his tongue for a minute, before attempting to swallow it. Unused to the consistency, he felt himself choke slightly the first time he tried. The second attempt it went down easier, but he still found himself coughing slightly once it was gone.

“Sorry, I should have warned you it’s strange your first time.” Kuai got down onto his knees, all the while stroking Hanzo’s face, and rubbing the saliva still dripping down from his mouth into his skin. “Still, that was excellent, well done.” The proud smile Kuai gave made something inside Hanzo sing with joy. “I think you deserve another reward for that.”

Hanzo was expecting another blowjob, only to be surprised when Kuai twisted his own body, turning his back completely to Hanzo. He was admittedly confused, although Kuai pressed himself backwards, so his back was flush against Hanzo’s chest. He grabbed Hanzo’s hands, bringing them up and wrapping them around his chest, making sure the hands were directly over his pecs.

And then, Hanzo felt Kuai grab his cock, and press it against his hole.

“So here's what’s going to happen,” Kuai started, pausing for Hanzo to moan as his cock was surrounded. Kuai was already lubed up, and Hanzo wondered just when he’d done it. Was this part of Kuai’s plan all along, or does he just like to be prepared? “You are going to fuck me, while also fucking yourself on my makeshift dildo. Understand?”

“Yes sir,” Hanzo breathed out, burying his face into Kuai’s shoulder as he bottomed out. Kuai felt so fucking good around him, he had to savour it for a moment. His fingers dug into the flesh of Kuai’s pecs, grabbing hold of them and marvelling at how soft they felt.

He began pulling back, finding that as his cock slid out of Kuai Liang, the ice sank deeper inside himself. And as he pressed forward into Kuai, the ice slipped out of him. He groaned, if he thought Kuai fingering him and sucking his cock was the heights that double pleasure could bring him, he realised now that he was sorely mistaken.

He could feel his entire body shake as he desperately tried to start a rhythm, but it was so hard when he couldn’t tell which he wanted more. To be seated deep within Kuai Liang or to have the ice cock all the way inside himself. It was like he was chasing two different pleasures and both of them were deliriously good.

Kuai wrapped a hand back, taking hold of Hanzo’s face and pulling it up. It was then that Kuai claimed his lips with his own, Hanzo moaning straight into Kuai’s mouth as he eagerly opened up to let their tongue’s mingle. Kuai accepted the move, swiping his tongue around Hanzo’s mouth and desperately tasting him. Hanzo gave a particularly hard thrust that had Kuai gasp.

Kuai pulled back slightly, still twisted to look at Hanzo the best he could. “Come on Hanzo, you can fuck me harder. I’m not that delicate.”

Hanzo wasn’t sure how the hell he could fuck Kuai harder than he already was doing, but the realisation that it’d mean he was fucking himself harder immediately encouraged him to at least try. His pace had been steady, not exactly slow but not as fast as it could be. He tried to speed up, trying to make his thrusts forward harder. He knew that Kuai probably had that same bundle of nerves that had made Hanzo see stars, but he had no idea how to find that spot in this situation.

“God, yes, that’s it,” Kuai growled, hungrily kissing Hanzo again, “so fucking good for me.” He lightly bit Hanzo’s lip. “First a perfect ass, and also a perfect cock. I’ve hit the jackpot with you, haven’t I?”

“Fuck,” Hanzo groaned under his breath, and by the Elder Gods he was going to cum again. He could feel his movements starting to stutter, not sure if he was trying to get himself to climax faster or if he was attempting to slow down so that this heavenly experience would last longer.

“Are you going to cum again?” Kuai asked, licking at Hanzo’s lips. Hanzo just nodded his head in agreement, squeezing Kuai’s pecs like they were a stress ball. “Good.” Kuai began to rock himself back and force, meeting Hanzo’s own movements. “I want you to cum inside me, pretty boy.”

The pet name caught him so completely off guard, all his efforts to try and not cum completely dissolved, and he immediately shot his load deep inside Kuai Liang. His partner laughed, kissing him again but continuing to move, like he didn’t want a drop of Hanzo’s cum anywhere except his ass.

“You liked being called a pretty boy that much?” He taunted, and Hanzo felt his face going hot again. He’d never been called such a thing before. Handsome, yes. Beautiful, yes. Pretty? No. Pretty boy, not even a combination of words he’d ever think to use for himself. “So many ways I could exploit that.”

“Please.” Hanzo wasn’t sure what he was pleading for. If he wanted Kuai to not use such a weakness against him, or if he wanted him to never call him anything else.

He felt Kuai untangle his arms, and pull himself off Hanzo’s cock. He was removed from the ice, it unceremoniously being broken, and he felt himself once more being pushed to the floor. This time however, Kuai Liang straddled his waist. He reached a hand behind, stroking Hanzo’s cock a couple of times, clearly trying to coax him to hardness again.

To his surprise, it took very little to get his cock interested.

God what is this man doing to me?

Once satisfied, Kuai repositioned himself until he was hovering above Hanzo’s cock, and soon he was lowering himself, while making sure to stuff Hanzo back inside him again. Hanzo groaned, hands balling into fists as he threw his them over his face. Kuai really wasn’t lying when he said he was insatiable. Hanzo wasn’t sure how much cum he had left in him, at this rate he was going to be completely dry for the rest of his life.

Kuai’s ass settled against Hanzo’s pelvis, resting his hands against Hanzo’s chest for stabilisation. He didn’t stay still for long, and soon he was rolling his hips, lifting himself and practically riding Hanzo’s cock into oblivion.

Hanzo’s hands darted forward to grab Kuai’s arms, at least to have something to hold onto. Kuai didn’t seem to mind, and it was clear he was trying to focus on himself this time, Hanzo practically just a glorified sex toy for him to use. Even so, Hanzo felt the way Kuai clenched around him, and wondered if this was the same thing Kuai had felt when he was the one topping.

“Gods, you are so big,” Kuai groaned in wonder as he forced Hanzo’s cock as far as it would go. “Best cock I’ve had in years.”

Well. That was definitely a nice stroke to Hanzo’s ego.

Even so, rather than smugly revelling in such a compliment, he found himself absolutely mesmerised by Kuai instead. Way his body moved, how his muscles flexed from the actions, how effortless this all was. He didn’t even look half as worn out as Hanzo felt, barely breaking out in a sweat. It was like he could go on all night and not get tired. His face was contorted into pure pleasure, his mouth open and tongue hanging out, eyes alternating between wide open and screwed shut.

Fuck, Hanzo was beginning to wonder if he’d died and gone to heaven at this point.

Kuai let out a loud moan, throwing his head back as he came, shooting all over Hanzo’s chest. The way his ass clenched around Hanzo was enough to send him over the edge as well, and soon he found himself cumming inside the other man once again. Kuai rolled his hips a couple more times, a satisfied sigh escaping his lips.

This time, Hanzo didn’t think there was any way for him to get hard again. Satisfied as he was, there was just no way. His dick was practically dead, and no amount of resuscitation was going to bring it back.

As Kuai finally got off him, Hanzo practically went limp on the floor, closing his eyes. He felt a pair of lips press against his cheek, and when he opened his eyes Kuai was nuzzling against his face.

“Think you can last just a little longer?” Kuai asked, and Hanzo resisted the urge to laugh in his face. Insatiable was an understatement. “I just want to cum one last time. You don’t have to do anything except be a warm hole for me to fuck.”

God, Kuai was trying to kill him, because he swore to the Gods that if it could, his dick would have gotten rock hard from that last sentence alone.

“Okay. One more time.” He agreed with a smile. Even if he was done, there was a weird satisfaction in knowing Kuai could still find use for him.

“Thank you.” Kuai kissed the tip of Hanzo’s nose, before gently flipping him onto his stomach.

Hanzo lay still in wait, feeling Kuai press himself against Hanzo’s back. He could feel Kuai’s cock probing once more at his hole, before slowly sinking into him. Hanzo moaned, his ass sore, but somehow it still felt so good. Kuai was practically covering him like a blanket, pinning him to the floor. Not that Hanzo could move if he wanted to.

He felt Kuai begin to thrust, practically pounding into Hanzo with such force it knocked the breath out of his lungs. Kuai’s lips were at Hanzo’s neck, mouthing at it and sucking kisses into his skin, marking him. And Hanzo wanted it. He wanted everyone to know who he belonged to, wanted everyone to know that Kuai Liang owned him.

Kuai’s dick was pistoning in and out of him, the other man moaning and groaning into his neck. His arms wrapped around Hanzo’s front, holding him close. There was a possessive note to the action, like Kuai thought someone could take Hanzo away from him. He wanted to assure him that wouldn’t happen, that if Kuai asked him to be his, he would be in an instant. That he and only he would ever have Hanzo in this way.

Hanzo would not submit to anyone else, only Kuai got that pleasure.

Kuai gave a particularly hard thrust, biting into Hanzo’s neck as he did, and Hanzo once more felt the satisfying sensation of being filled with cum. Kuai jerked his hips, before finally unhinging his jaw. Hanzo felt Kuai completely withdraw from him, and he was equal parts devastated it was over and relieved he could rest.

After all, maybe he could convince Kuai to let this happen again some time.

Kuai rounded to kneel in front of him, running a hand through Hanzo’s hair and smiling down at him.

“That was wonderful,” Kuai told him, before reaching to help Hanzo sit up, and eventually stand. “Come, let’s clean you up.”

Hanzo didn’t say anything, just let Kuai lead him off to what he assumed was a bathroom, internally plotting how he’d bring up the possibility of doing this all over again at a later date.

Hanzo was lying back in the bed, staring at the ceiling with his hands on his chest. Now that he was cleaned up and the adrenaline had completely worn off, he was trying to compute what he’d just learnt about himself. If Kuai still refused to help him, he guessed he’d at least discovered what a pleasurable experience being in submission could be. Even if deep inside, he wasn’t sure it’d be that good with anyone other than Kuai Liang.

He looked up towards where Kuai was leaning against a desk, a cigarette in his hand and exhaling the smoke from his nose. Hanzo cleared his throat, feeling like he needed to say something.

“That was… intense,” Hanzo commented, unsure what other word he could use to describe it. He watched as Kuai smirked to himself.

“I did try to warn you.” Kuai shrugged, taking one final drag of his cigarette before putting it out on an ashtray.

“Do you do that a lot?” Hanzo questioned, because the only way he could conceive of Kuai being that skilled in sex was that he’d had a lot of it. Skilled enough to make Hanzo reconsider his entire relationship with sexual intercourse.

“Not… like that.” Kuai grimaced as he pushed himself away from the desk and began to walk over to Hanzo. “Although I suppose the benefit of almost exclusively being the receiver is you learn a thing or two about what feels good and what doesn’t.”

“I see.” Kuai had definitely made comments throughout that suggested he preferred to bottom. But regardless, he was definitely excellent at playing the dominant. “Well… You’re very good at it.”

“Thank you,” Kuai chipperly replied, and Hanzo almost laughed at how proud of himself he sounded.

“So. Does this mean you’ll help me now?” Hanzo didn’t really want to spoil the good mood, but he needed to know the answer. He was relieved when Kuai Liang gave him a sloppy smile.

“Well, that was what we agreed.” He sat down at the foot of the bed, looking at Hanzo with what he’d almost describe as a fond expression. “I will help you get your revenge, Hanzo Hasashi.”

Kuai Liang was a man of his word, thankfully.

“But, I think you probably need a bit more rest before we start talking about that.” And then that previously fond smile turned back into that signature smirk. “I did rather run a number on you.”

“Maybe I should run one on you, just so we’re even,” Hanzo commented without even thinking what he was saying.

Kuai laughed in response, “given what just happened, do you really think you can handle me, Hasashi?”

Hanzo felt his face go hot, as Kuai hopped off the bed. Kuai did seem like he'd be a handful in general in the bedroom, regardless of what role or position he was in. Hanzo felt like he was up to the challenge, even if Kuai clearly didn’t think so.

“That said…” Kuai said with a drawn out drawl, slowly walking away towards the bedroom door. “I certainly wouldn’t say no to riding your cock again, pretty boy.”

Hanzo spluttered at the use of that pet name again, and even without turning around to see him, Kuai began to cackle at the reaction. He didn’t say anything more, just gleefully continued to leave the room, practically skipping with the knowledge he’d gotten under Hanzo’s skin that much.

As Hanzo threw himself back down against the bed, he ran his hands down his face and despite himself, smiled.

This was going to be a very interesting alliance.

#mortal kombat #subscorp #sub zero #kuai liang #scorpion #hanzo hasashi #🧙🏼‍♂️we are entranced spellbound

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weebsinstash · 2 years ago

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Ok but like imagine singer reader who’s like the star of a show but is underscovered so like one day after working a shift for Val she goes to her room and starts singing and Val overhears it from the cam and mic and every demon seeing is just screaming for more

I've thought of like, hypothetical scenarios where "Reader is helping clean a set as a janitor as a second job or is help cleaning the strip club after close (i don't think it actually closes though, like conceptually) and Valentino catches you signing and bopping your hips because no one is around so you're getting sassy with it"

Like I think I mentioned it before but imagine Reader just being like "just collab with other artists or industries or just like sponsor a talent for something else and then bring them to porn later, more people will want to fuck a celebrity turned sex worker over just a sex worker outright, it's the purity culture of it or whatever" and Val is just "k bet" and decides to make you some kind of test subject or like, he discovers your secret career or maybe you have a sms account where you're blowing up for songs and dance covers or whatever and he decides to kind of like, see what happens if maybe he promotes you a little more. Like his boyfriend literally basically runs the tech and media world of the Pride Ring, it would be very easy to arrange you a TV spot or some kind of performance where he could sort of test, ok you think you're such hot shit, let's see you walk the walk. Also lowkey I just straight up see them doing insider trading shit, buying stocks in companies or your label or whatever before they know youre going to drop a song or do a certain sponsorship and Valentino is like "oh this is actually pretty lucrative, tf 😳"

You know how celebrities and public figures will like deliberately have PR stunts where they pretend to date for publicity and shit. Imagine Valentino tries to do that with you and realizes oh wait shit you know what I'm too possessive for this shit actually 😜 or he even, decides he himself will be the "celebrity" you're publicly dating like lmao the articles and photos of you two together drop and it starts rumors and people are responding with that one image of the hamster and the banana and he's like "hmmm business opportunity while I can simultaneously be a creep maybe? 🤔" like he leans in, maybe even being publicly flirtatious and such, doing things he knows will get clicks and articles, like suddenly he's getting you really fixed up to hang out at clubs together and be some sort of weird power couple and also like, depending on your public persona maybe he's using the absurdity of the pairing to gain attention, like if you're a sweet peppy popstar and you're a little shy and then there's. Him. No extra commentary needed lol. Like you know how certain headlines male you go "no way" and you just have to read and see for yourself? He capitalizes on that. He IS a businessman after all

Also god yeah I still occasionally think of that one "readers room is an old set they don't use for whatever reason and it has hidden cameras someone turns on" because of all the different routes for that. Like imagine you're toiling away as a server and you find out about the livestreams and one night you're pissed and he's getting under your skin and you start being a brat and then whenever he basically starts threatening you, you hit him with "oh, well, if im such a stupid bitch I guess I can get another place to live and ruin your little livestreams right? Or what if I just walked into my room and stared directly at the camera and let everyone know that I know they're watching which will INSTANTLY lose you at least half the viewership because they get off on knowing I don't know I'm being watched?" And it just shuts him right up as you basically tell him you're not going to pay rent anymore and you're going to use your wages on things you want for yourself and he can just deduct your rent from all the money he makes from the livestreams

Like I just sit and think of ways Reader could fuck with him or try and turn around this creepy situation to her benefit. Like you're in your room and you know you're sitting at an angle where no one can see your phone and you're occasionally maybe even browsing the chat of your own livestream and you see username [mod] mothpimp repeatedly being a creep and you know it's him so you just text him something like "oh you can say I got a nice ass in a chat room but be a bitch to my face?" And like THIS is how you tell him you know. Or like, something you already do a lot is talk aloud and so you just say shit out loud to make the stream laugh at him or mock him and shit. Like you roll your eyes and 'slam your phone down' "Valentino is such a cunt. Acting like he's hot shit and He's That Bitch when he's got literally no ass, cake nonexistent"

Because think about it, if you aren't happy or at least calm, your streams suffer. Yeah the hard-core fans will notice changes in your demeanor, or, like, maybe reader kind of adapts to this like lowkey traumatic situation and becomes completely desensitized to being watched in her room because maybe it starts having legitimate benefits, besides all the consequences. I imagine realistically it would be very difficult to keep anyone from letting you know about the livestreams and I've even considered Valentino not letting you have a phone or certain tech so that you quite literally cannot find out you're online without your knowledge, but, I mean, for fictional stories you can do anything. It's My sleepover and I get to pick the movie and I like the idea of Reader becoming like actually semi famous over this shit because it's like, yeah perverts are watching but maybe some people start watching you because they think you seem nice or maybe they share a hobby with you and some people are like getting legitimately parasocial, like developing that one mental illness where someone believes a celebrity or artist or singer is performing specifically for them and confessing their love for them" which actually now that I think about it that's a Villain!Present Mic fic idea I started a draft for ages ago

But yeah like, maybe Reader even forces Valentino's hand to give her a decent or even substantial wage on the argument that, you being able to buy shit and like entertainment stuff gives you more to do in your room, and thus, more content for the streams, and like, he seems like a tightwad who barely pays his employees shit but like, he's also A Total Weirdo Himself and he's curious/eager to see what all you would do because, bruh if an employee hadn't began livestreaming your room he probably would have just watched the streams privately. I've also considered, for this concept and also just in general, imagine stumbling on Valentino's phone left open or he's got some hot pink laptop he leaves open or like maybe you're even in his house (like the gang was in the limo and he stopped at his house to grab something and everyone is briefly inside) and you just discover he's got, um, a suspicious amount of materials of you saved. Screenshots, photos, I've even be like "what if Valentino was openly indifferent and maybe even rude as fuck to the Reader but it's a fucking lie and he's a tsundere and he leaves his phone open one day and you find it and there's just like tons and tons of videos where he just came in your room while you were sleeping and just watched you apparently"

And, also ok, to be horny on main like, his eyes glow in the dark and shit and imagine going to sleep in like shorts or something and during your sleep you just kind of roll around and wind up over the covers or partially exposed and he can just walk up and, take his finger and just part the crotch of your shorts and underwear. just looks at/photographs/drools over the sight of your pussy like a creep. you eventually snap out of sleep with his mouth between your thighs and all you can see is the glowing pink in the darkness as you basically wake up with an orgasm, like 🥵🥵🥵🥵🥵 and of course he still needs to get off too and, well, since you're awake now and everything, and already so dripping wet for him---

#id honestly like to practice singing more bc its just fun to do but my anxiety is so bad i dont even like doing it in privatw #also when you live in apartments you have to bw mindful of neighbors hearing you #but ughhhh i love art and music and i wanna do more fun stuff in my free time #yandere stuff #sinprompts #hh #sorry i keep forgetting someone wanted me to tag hazbin stuff

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yelenasdog · 4 years ago

Text

the pillowtalk of a pessimist (spencer reid x fem reader)

genre: fluff with a millisecond of angst

summary: pillowtalk takes an interesting turn for spencer at the mention of the harsh realities of his work.

words: 1.3k, she’s a shorty.

warnings: nsfw themes (nothing smutty, it’s just implied and also directly stated that they slept together), typical criminal minds violence + death, and maybe cursing? idk.

a/n: btw this isn’t the fic i was ranting on about that i’m writing, she’s still in the works. also! this could be an x oc or anybody bc i didn’t use y/n if you would prefer to read it as such.

🂦∙🂦∙🂦

A pale stream of moonlight shone through the open window of apartment 23, the home of Doctor Spencer Reid. It illuminated a small section of his bedroom, specifically on one of his many floor to ceiling bookshelves, a beacon of knowledge that was there 24/7 for the taking.

The gold engravings on the spines of his many reads shimmered, a beautiful contrast to the dark mahogany the shelf was made out of.

The room smelled like a mixture of his cologne, her perfume (Chanel no. 5, specifically), and the results of their previous affairs that lingered in the crisp air of the night.

She took a deep breath, settling down further into the white duvet, pulling it over her bosom in response to the chilly temperature. The dark green walls of the room welcomed and calmed her, overwhelming the girl with a wave of serenity that could only be brought to her by him.

He quickly took note of her unsteady breathing and shift in position, immediately jumping to action. He pulled her closer by her shoulders with his strong arms, eliciting a squeal from her and a chuckle from him, more so at her reaction than the move itself.

Her head laid on his bare chest, her hair splayed out with half of it residing on his pillow, the other half on his bicep. She could have appeared to be an angel, although in his eyes, she truly was.

She rested her hand on the left side of his chest over his heart, her fingernail ghosting shapes on his tanned skin. Circles, squiggly lines, even abstract faces.

“How do you do it?”

Her voice was quiet, barely above a whisper. If his hearing wasn’t so acute, he was sure he would have missed it. This would have saddened the genius greatly, as he valued everything she had to say with a burning ferocity, and even one word lost would be a shame.

“What?”

He was confused by the nature of the question, attempting to search every corner of his brilliant brain for what she might have been referencing. Was it an equation? No, she hated math. Perhaps the way he so effortlessly could play any instrument because yet again, math. He decided that couldn’t be the subject at question either, she played better than he did, glorious melodies flowed from her fingertips. So the doctor was truly stumped.

The answer was simpler than he had imagined.

“Your job.”

With those doe eyes he was so fond of, she looked up, meeting his own glance.

If the term “heart eyes” was able to be personified, Spencer would be the guy to personify it whenever his eyes landed on the one in front of him.

“What do you mean? I get up in the morning, drink some coffee, and get to it.”

She giggled, but the sound he loved so much ceased with her pout.

“That’s not what I mean, Spence. How do you go on everyday, seeing body after body,” she trailed off, obviously distraught. Spencer wrapped his large hand tighter around her, placing his chin on her hairline.

“How do you consistently manage to look at these victims, these people, with lives that they never got to finish living-“ A tear slipped down her cheek, she bit her bottom lip, tasting her own salty droplets on her tongue. She sniffled, burying her head further in his neck with what he presumed was shame.

“And not break down when you do.” Her voice was muffled, but the emotions she felt were evident nonetheless.

He took a moment to carefully articulate an appropriate response. The gears in his mind turned ever so diligently, finding a solution to dry her tears.

“It’s not much different than what I initially said. I get up in the morning, drink some coffee.”

He pushed a hair away from her face, admiring her distinct features as he often did. She looked up, moving her left hand to trace his sharp jaw as he sat in thought.

“And I realize that these people that are now dead, are a part of the hundreds, of throusands, of millions of people that die every year. It’s a part of life, what gives it meaning.”

She gave a dry, humourless laugh.

“What, you don’t have a specific statistic for that?”

“Oh, I do, but I don’t think you want to hear it.” He tilted his head, weighing the option of disclosing the information but deciding against it.

“But the bottom line is, they have families. Families that are grieving, and hurting, and needing answers and justice. I cannot do my job and give them the closure they deserve if I’m staying focused on my own emotions and delving deep into who the victims were, rather than how to catch those responsible for hurting them.”

She moved on to her back, stilling managing to keep her eye contact with Spencer.

“But you’re a profiler! That’s what you do! You’re supposed to, what did you call it, ‘delve deep’ into who they are.”

“Pretty girl, are you trying to tell the one with 3 doctorates how to do his job?”

She rolled her eyes, lazily throwing a hand on his neck, right behind his ear. She ran it back and forth, savoring the intimate moment.

“Yeah, yeah. Shut up, Agent.” She taunted, poorly trying (and failing) to agitate Spencer. She had a hunch (that was more true than either of them would let on) that it wasn’t possible for her to do so, and he found himself proving it to be correct.

“I just had to learn to let the family do what they had to do so that I could do the same.”

The girl’s tone softened as she spoke, staring at the popcorn ceiling.

“I guess so. I’m just too empathetic, my heart is too pure.” She joked, a feathery laugh falling past both of their lips.

“Of course. I would expect nothing less.” He teased back, enjoying the dynamic they both held in the tender moment.

“You amaze me.” She muttered, leaning in, analyzing him and his ruffled post-sex hair, his gorgeously long lashes, and his light 5 o’clock shadow that donned his chin.

He huffed quietly, doing the exact same thing, minus the scruff of course.

“I could say the same to you, pretty girl.”

Their lips connected once again, in a different manner than the feverish and needy kiss from before.

This time, it was a union of two individuals, allowing themselves to mould together in a way only the two of them could. It was slower and sweeter, with more feeling poured into their lips while they moved in sync.

“M’ tired.”

“Yeah? You wanna go to sleep, bubs?”

She grinned as she snuggled into his arms, her exhausted eyes fluttering to a close.

“Bubs, huh? That’s new.”

A worried frown made its way onto his face as he rushed to cover up his previous words.

“D-do you not like it? I’m sorry if I made you uncomfortable-“

“Spence.”

He stopped, looking over her for any microexpressions, only seeing positive signs. That wasn’t technically profiling, right? He hoped he would be in the clear if she ever was to find out.

“I love it, baby. Say it again.”

“Bubs?”

“Mhm. Say it again.” She sounded with content. He smirked, a proud feeling infiltrating his body, causing him to puff up his chest in the slightest way.

“Goodnight, bubs.”

He reached up, his paranoia forcing him to close the window above him, despite being a more than qualified FBI agent with a revolver safely tucked away in the top drawer of his night stand that never quite was shut all the way.

It was just the pessimist in him.

She wrapped around his figure, intertwining his form with her own.

“Sleep well, Spence.”

He felt happy with her, happier than he had been in a long time. He relished in that, allowing it to lull him to a well needed rest.

But what could he say, she just brought out the optimist in him.

🂦∙🂦∙🂦

hj posting at a time that isn’t 3 am?????? unheard of. also i may or may not have pulled an all nighter to write whatever tf this is bc my ex posted something with his new gf and i felt pathetic LMAO. anyway, i hope your day is fabulous, go drink some water and remember things are what you make of them and it’s all about intent! love you, xx hj.

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angelthebedsheet · 4 years ago

Text

scrapping with bakugo and SLEEPING his ass

a/n: i was watching fight videos and remembered that girl knocking her bf tf out while they were play fighting so we finna host a fight club in the ua common room lmao male reader btw

lets get it

contains cussin as usual, fighting, usage of the slur nigga, black! deku, black! mina, angry bakugo, meechonmars/dopeisland vine reference, TODOROKI, KAMINARI, SERO AND MINA ARE MESSYYYYY

——————————————————————————

Bakugo Katsuki

“You guys should fight.” Kaminari said. “Why should we? I don’t wanna hurt him even though I’ll win.” Bakugo said, not looking up from his phone. “Right, okay, but the last time you said you got bitched out by Midoriya? Don’t bite off more than you can chew, baby.” M/N commented, scrolling through his feed. “H-Hey don’t include me in this!” Midoriya exclaimed as Bakugo scoffed. “Shut the fuck up. Don’t forget how you got laid out by ya moms in front of Aizawa.” Bakugo said as he glared at him. “That’s how you feel? Aight then bet. Get up.” M/N said as he stood up. Sero and Kaminari shot up and started to move the furniture. “Did I hit a nerve?” Bakugo said, mockingly as he put his phone down. “Nah. We jus gon have to fight without our quirks. I bet you I’ll sleep yo ass.” M/N said. “If you start leaking then that’s on you.” Bakugo said as he stood up.

“Aww shittt. It’s about to go down. Place ya bets!” Kaminari said. “Bakubro don’t go overboard! He’s still your man.” Kirishima said. “And I will fight my man. Ain’t no special treatment.” Bakugo said as he fixed his slippers. M/N fixed his pants and kicked his slides off. “Without shoes?” Midoriya mumbled. “I think this is very inappropriate behavior! You shouldn’t fight your significant other! He’s also your classmate!” Iida said while making chopping motions. “Iida, my nigga. Respectfully shut the fuck up.” M/N sang as he cracked his knuckles.

“I-you know what I’m going to be quiet.” Iida mumbled as he crossed his arms. Aoyama only snickered and patted his shoulder. “ROCK HIS SHIT!” Mina exclaimed. Uraraka looked at her. “W-Who’s side are you on?” She asked. Mina shrugged and giggled. “Girl, ion know. I just wanna see some hands get thrown bad girl club style.”

“You ready, bae?”

“Fuck yeah. You ready, M/N?”

“Aight then! Fight!” Sero called out. “Kaachan’s gonna start with a left hook.” Midoriya whispered to Uraraka. “Deku, darling. We get that you read him just give us some funny commentary or shut it.” Aoyama said as he threw a pillow at him. Midoriya squealed as he caught it. Bakugo swang on M/N. “Weave!” He called out as he moved from the swing. “M/N better win this. I wanna see Bakugo get knocked out.” Todoroki grumbled while recording. They watched as Bakugo and M/N kept swinging on each other, until Bakugo punched him in his side too hard.

M/N winced and backed up, holding his side. “Oh shit. Baby, you okay?” Bakugo asked, worriedly as he looked at his side. “Oh nah, I’m finna whoop ya ass.” He said as he took off his hoodie and tossed it at Todoroki. “YUH! GO CRAZY ON HIS ASS, M/N! MINK MINK MINK!” Mina yelled as she stood on the couch. “SHUT IT, PINKY!” Bakugo yelled. M/N pulled up his pants and ran up on Bakugo. Bakugo dodged a punch and swang. M/N ducked and punched him in the jaw. “BOW.” He exclaimed

“DAMNNNNNNNN.” Everyone yelled, standing up as Bakugo folded. “K.O. Nigga! Take yo ass to sleep.” M/N exclaimed. “Oh my god...” Momo mumbled as Mina stared at Bakugo’s knocked figure. Iida crouched down and gently slapped Bakugo’s cheek. “Oh wow. He’s. He’s out.” He said. “Period I guess. Shit.” Sero said as he chuckled. “You just knocked him out that easily? How? Did you hit a pressure point?” Midoriya asked. “Bro ion know. All I know is that I knocked the nigga out. Aight move I’ll take him to Recovery Girl.” M/N said as Todoroki tossed him his hoodie. He pulled it back on. He slipped his slides back on and put Bakugo over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes.

“I now have the best video I’ve ever seen. I’m never deleting this.” Todoroki said as he sent it to the 1-A groupchat. “He... He just put Bakugo to sleep, kero.” Tsuyu said. “Told y’all I’d knock his ass out. See yall.” M/N said as he went down the hall. “I bet you Bakubro’s gonna be PISSED.” Kirishima said as he plopped back down on the couch. “Then it is what it is. If Bakugo gets dragged twice in one day it was meant to be.” Todoroki commented as he lightly smiled at the video. “I’m surprised Bakugo went down that easily.” Jiro said as she fiddled with her earphone jack.

——————————————————

“You’re TRASH.” M/N yelled as he pressed down on the buttons. Mina could only laugh as she watched tears roll down Midoriya’s face. “My dick is in yo mouth. My dick is in yo mouth.” He exclaimed as he got in Midoriya’s face. Midoriya sniffled as he continued to play. Sero started wheezing. “Damn, bro. You really do eat ass at playing 2K.” Kaminari commented. “S-Shut up, I know.” Midoriya whined as he wiped his eye.

They perked up as they heard stomping footsteps. “WHERE THE FUCK IS HE?” Bakugo yelled. “OH SHITTTTTT ROUND 2, YALL!” Mina screamed as she jumped over the couch. Todoroki ran out of the kitchen, one hand holding his bowl of soba and the other holding his phone up. “Woah waittttt.” He said as he slid to sit in the corner. Bakugo swang around the corner, hands popping. “Oop, lemme move because I do NOT want to be caught in this.” Midoriya said as he paused the game and ran out the way. “Shittt I even got my Mortal Kombat music and Jiro’s microphone.” Kaminari said as he stood next to Sero.

“You.” Bakugo growled as he pointed at M/N. “Hey baby. How’s the jaw?” He asked as he looked at Bakugo. Bakugo’s eye twitched before he lunged at M/N. Kirishima yelped as Kaminari immediately started playing the music. “Round 2! Fight!” He announced in the microphone. “Nah you not finna mush like that, bro.” M/N exclaimed. “AAAAAAANDDDD THEY SCRAPING LIKE DOGS!!!” Kaminari yelled as Todoroki slurped on his soba. “LET’S GOOOOOO!” Mina exclaimed as she jumped up and down. Midoriya watched with his jaw dropped as Bakugo dragged M/N by his ankle out of the living room.

“OH SHIT THE FIGHT’S MOVING.” Kaminari yelled as he ran after them. Mina and Todoroki got up and jumped over the couch to chase them. Sero, Midoriya, Tsuyu and Hagakure slid into the hallway. They all watched and recorded as Bakugo and M/N threw connecting punches at each other. “GET ON TOP, M/N! WHOOP HIS ASS AGAIN!” Mina yelled as she clapped her hands. “Should we intervene?” Midoriya asked Sero. “Nah give em a couple minutes, then we step in—” Sero was cut off by Kaminari screaming into the mic. “GODDAMN!” He yelled as M/N kicked Bakugo in the chest, knocking the wind outta him. Bakugo groaned as he curled up in a ball.

“NOW WE STEP IN.” Midoriya yelled as he ran and grabbed M/N from pouncing on him. Todoroki stood there recording Bakugo. “Damn. That’s rough, buddy.” He commented as Kirishima helped Bakugo up. Mina high fived M/N before running to Bakugo. Sero shook his head. “Well shittttt. This has been another Bad UA Club fight.” Kaminari said as he looked at Kirishima and Mina helping Bakugo.

#x black reader #bnha x black!reader #bnha x poc!reader #crack fic #no cap this was making me WHEEZE #this was mad fun to do #did my aggression towards bakugo shine thru even tho im a baku kinnie?#absolutely #did i project onto mina and todoroku bc im messy?#but you know DAMN well mina and todoroki would be that messy in a fight #esp todoroki he prolly watching that fight before he goes to bed #they probably ooc but idc #its 2:02am #its been a while since ive made one of these #uhhmm love yall

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darthbecky726 · 4 years ago

Text

Bad Batch 1x01 spoilers

I've never done something like this before, but I figured I'd start. Reactions to the first episode of The Bad Batch. (This ended up being a lot longer than I intended, but whatever)

Spoilers under the cut

Red logo burning away starts strong

Yay narrator dude!!

Feels like clones wars

Animated rots scenes!!

And what grevious did after the rots beginning

HOLY SHIT DEPA!!!!!

And caleb right???

And we're in

Omg who voiced young caleb bc it sounds a lot like fpj but aged down and he def doesn't sound like the 14 I know he was when this happened

I like how we started out on familiar characters but not ahsoka or anyone from tcw. We started w young kanan and his master and we know what happened to them and all but if anyone watching hasn't seen rebels they wouldn't be lost as to who caleb and depa are, they'd just assume they're random jedi in o66

Good ol droid screaming as it falls off a cliff

Wow. Them.

I love crosshair

And wrecker

And tech

And echo

And hunter

B1's are so dumb

Lmao the salt from hunter

I feel like depas forehead pearls are a bit unrealistically large but I have no cultural standpoint to really know so...

Caleb's voice is too deep in the same way that jack frost from rotg's voice doesn't match his character model

Ah wrecker not really knowing what she means and echo, the one who has been trained to deal w people and hung out w ani and obi is just like 'thanks general'

Obes kenobes mention

Why is echo so pale

Depa and caleb feel a little too pale too tbh I wonder if it's the lighting or the whitewashing

Wow caleb is a lot like ezra, I can see why kanan wanted to train him lol

Is this what separates caleb and depa, leading to her telling him to run??? Do I need to read dume???

Oh no

Noooooooooo

Bb didn't get the order!

Oh caleb nooooo! Nooooooo they didn't receive that order, they can help you!!!

And he's gone

Oh I need an au where caleb stayed with bb and they helped him after depa died

Hunter sounds so much like rex it's weird like ik they're supposed to sound the same but it feels like wrecker is replacing rex or something. Even tho ik rex's story is over for the time being

Crosshair, no! Don't shoot at him! He's baby

Oh no did crosshair get o66???? It didn't seem to trigger anything in any of the rest of them, but is crosshair close enough to 'reg' for it to have triggered???

😭😭good soldiers follow orders

"sure thing, boss" "hey hunter got a sitch"

Crosshair acting sus

Oh I love watching padawans fight, they're so good!!

I hope that hit to the tree did a lil cognitive recalibration for crosshair, he was acting crazy

Caleb looks so scared!! He just watched his master get gunned down by his friends and now strange clones are trying to kill him/confusing him

Oh caleb

Oh no crosshair don't try to kill him!! Hunters trying to help!

Also hunter doesn't sound as much like rex w the helmet off, but it's weird bc most of the clones are distinguishable by voice even w helmets on. I guess it's the 'im in charge' voice

Star wars if caleb had gone w the bb

Oh hunter u sly dog lying to crosshair so he doesn't go after him. U gotta figure out why crosshair responded to o66 and no one else in ur unit did

Oh crosshair knows he's been lied to

I will always love coming-out-of-hyperspace shots

Ooh kamino, always nice this time of year

Echo is done w wrecker

Why hasn't crosshair taken his helmet off yet, lil bit sus

They better get his chip out on kamino, I don't wanna deal w this

Oof hunter

Oh who’s that, giving me cloud city vibes

Extreme cloud city vibes wow

Never realized how many clones are just on kamino

Coruscant guard?!?! FOX?!?!

The vibes here, omg

‘The war is over’ wow

Oh no who was that

A female jedi, doesn’t appear to be shaak, couldn’t see any montrals but never know, we don’t officially know how or where she died

Ok wow none of the bb has their helmets on except for crosshair, who got the order. The regs around kamino all have their helmets on. That scene in victory and death when ahsoka took rex’s helmet off-

And crosshair, he’s actins strange too

Oh tech, do u guys get bullied by regs a lot??

I love their barracks

Lol he finally took his helmet off only to stick a toothpick in his mouth, can he get anymore cliched?

Wrecker is seeming a lot more infantilized than he was in the s7 eps...

Yeah crosshair’s being sus

Ooh, he shifted his toothpick

Lmao ‘what programming’

Well documented my ass

Tech’s speech patterns are so stiff and robotic, it’s like he has to remind himself to talk in basic instead of binary or some shit

Tech throwing shade at crosshair

I can’t quite tell if we’re supposed to like crosshair at this point

Lmao we been knew

Oop ‘more machine than man’ the vader parallels are serving folks

Understatement.

Ugh sheev

Crusty ass bitch

Straight from rots wow

Who is the mystery child and why does he look mandalorian

Ooh he gone

Oh no, the beninning of the empire

Cheering?? Why?!?

That imperial march fade in tho

Thank you echo

Oh shit mystery child is female

Omega, I would not have guessed the pronunciation of your name by reading it wow

She def seems mandalorian

Ugh kaminoans

Oh the kaminoan pronounced it as it usually is, huh.

Omega’s character model def seems more masculine than female, I now headcanon her as trans

Ugh tarkin, I hate that crusty bitch

Empire politics ugh

I love how much shade is being thrown at tarkin and his stormtrooper proposal lmao

Why do all these clones have the standard haircut?? ik them boys like their variety, even if these boys are still under o66′s programming

Wrecker you’re being extremely loud

They’re all being loud in the mess, why

They remember, kid

Lol child

Oh my sweet summer children

The dad instinct was clearly passed genetically from jango lol all these clones got it

Why are background characters so mean? What about it, shiny? Why is ur hair regulation, reg??

The Sad Batchn omg the slander

Lol the food fight I’ve read about in the fics, its finally happening!

Is she.... australian??

The over-animation of character movements in this is reminding me of the looser style of rebels, as opposed to the more clunky style of tcw

Lmao he’s still got food on him

Food fight!!

‘Not again’???!!! Echo!! Wdym not again?! Food fights have happened before?!?? Wait. W bb or w torrent, bc I can see torrent having food fights on the resolute-

Crosshair’s just eating his food until someone messes

I like how echo still has his kamas

Oh no echo!!

Oh echo’s trauma, he doesn’t trust medical droids! Where’s kix when u need him, huh?

Lol, comically long name for a robot trope is alive and well, huh

Lmao the droid lowers his voice like ik this is a perceived bad thing, but I will not tolerate this slander, boys u need to get off kamino

‘The shock’ lmao whyyy

Lmao tech!!

Oh, echo recognized tarkin from the citadel!

‘When you blew up’ lmao

Oh they make me sad

Aaaaah fox!

Man the domino squad nostalgia

Those droids look cool

This is a neat scene, I like seeing them in action

Wrecker reminding me of hevy, but he’s got the training and success to back it up

Live fire???? No!!

Ugh I hate tarkin

Oh no wtecker

Did he just get shot!???!

Oh no crosshair, be careful!

Tarkin’s trying to kill them!!!

Lol wrecker I love you

Echo using his mech hand as a weapon, truly an arc

Now I wanna see what happened on felucia

I like how tech’s just sitting on the droid’s shoulders

And hunter just had a knife

These boys, I love them

Oh no tech bby

Hot damn that was cool

Wrecher things so too lmao

Tarkin’s like “why didn’t that work??’

Oh new baby clones

No tf they could not, they would never serve the empire and those bitches

I love that they have a window apartment lol

Ugh tarkin u shifty

They all stand at attention, only after glaring at tarkin

Oh no onderon

I hate tarkin, he’s a bitch

How quickly could bitch lord and darth sad have replaced the armory on kamino??

Crosshair still acting sus

Neither does echo, kid

No.

I like omega.

Crosshair, with the sassy hand on the hip-

What does that even mean?? Or elude to??

Lmao tech messing w wrecker, they rlly r bros

Its prob the vegetation

Oh, I missed onderon, but not this much

Lol the put-upon sigh

Its clearly saw and his rebels

Saw! Looking sharp, what’s w the hair....

That’s a very geometric beard, saw

They didn’t kill any jedi!

That’s not what happened, tech

‘The clones’ bitch that was rex and ahsoka, check urself

Aw, I’ve always like the design of imperial probe droids

Thank you, echo

It seems like crosshair’s o66 programming and his mutation are warring w his morals

Lmao the shade

I knew she was an enhanced clone!

Oh, so she is (at least on paper) trans! She’s a clone of jango, and yet she’s female! That must be her modification, but it makes me wonder why

Lol *flicks toothpick*

Aw, they have a picture of themselves! Recent-ish, too, its got echo!

Oh no, AZI!

The difference between them arriving earlier and now, the lack of escort...

Creepy how they had to open the hanger door themselves

Oh no! Everyone!

The coruscant guard, I wish they had gotten better

Tarkin u dramatic bitch

‘The brig’ this ain’t some tallship

Lol echo that shade

Their blacks are different from the ones seen in the past

Crosshair, stop being a bitch

Oh, I don’t like that phrase!! And the fact that crosshair screamed it in echo’s face makes me uneasy. Did rex fill echo in on why fives died?? I hope so...

Crosshair, ur chip hurting??

This child, I like her.

No! Don’t hit hunter!

No crosshair!!!!

I dislike this immensly

So they do still have inhibitor chips!

Tarkin you monster

Oh poor crosshair

ihatethisihatethisihatethis

Lol tech I love you

Wrecker you sweet pea

Lol that’s adorable

I love how they form a “wall” its so suspicious

He was about to say that, omega

Aaww, echo protective boi

Wrecker shut up tf

That was cool

Sneaky bois

This reminds me of rex and ahsoka sneaking around in v&d

Echo runs so stupid

Oh no they winter soldier’d him!

If he says who the hell is crosshar, I will lose my shit

Yes, he has. They took it from him.

The toothpick

I wonder how they’re gonna get crosshair back to normal

Not good that they nabbed the sniper

Oh, crosshair shot him in the same place he got hit during training!

Ooh, a kaminoan on their side!

I hope omega doesn’t die

Poor trigger etiquette, crosshair

Wonder if omega has any speciality training

They’re just gonna leave him there!?!?!?!?!

Nooooooooooo!!!!!!!

Omega reminds me of young boba

Oh, so its in her dna

Go back for crosshair!!

Holy fucking shit that was amazing! I didn’t expect it to be that long, but I’m not complaining! This ended up being a lot longer than I anticipated, but I don’t feel like cutting anything out, so sorry for the long post but at least I put it under a cut.

#bad batch spoilers #bad batch #spoilers #star wars #long post #play by play #sw #becky's fandom rambles

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skinks · 5 years ago

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Please Please talk to me about Maggie Tozier and what she’s like and looks like and what Dilfworth Tozier loves about her and made him put a ring on it and in general how much her two boys love her and how she loves them.

[cracks knuckles] here we go

I was looking through my copy of the book yesterday to answer this ask but then I figured, y’know what? Canon can suck it. I tend to beat myself up over accurate characterisation for Richie and Eddie, but they’re main characters, Maggie and Went are not, so the details are inconsequential. Their ages in the Dilfworth fic mean that they’d have a pretty different life experience from their book versions, what with growing up in the 60s/70s, but imo all that matters is that they love Richie and are good parents. Canon is ours now!!!

- my no.1 headcanon rn is that Maggie sings like an angel, and sings all the time. In the car, in the shower, gardening, housework, cooking. She and Went have a pretty good record collection, but if Went is listening to something and hears Maggie singing to herself in another room of the house he shuts that shit off quick so he can hear her.

- I wrote in ithots that Richie busts out into song at the drop of a hat, right? well, where Richie gets encouragement with his Voices through Went participating, Richie gets his incessant singing from Maggie, because he grew up in a household where that was welcomed.

- Maggie doesn’t even notice she’s doing it until Richie joins in, or she turns around and sees Went gazing at her all dopey, and she gets self-conscious

- until Went is like “I don’t know why. You know I think you’re a songbird” and then grins and calls her Magpie. She says stop. He says, Maggie-pie? She throws a dishcloth at him but secretly loves it because she fell in love with how frank and practical he is most of the time, but also how silly he is only when it comes to her and Richie.

- he only calls her that when they’ve had one too many anyway, otherwise it’s all sweetheart, honey, darling, Mags. Marguerite, in Richie’s stupid French Waiter Voice. “Yes ma’am” for when he’s rearranging her guts. Maggie’s the one to call him “my love” the first time, but she said it kinda exaggerated and jokey, and Maggie just doesn’t joke the way Went and Richie do so Richie noticed the way his dad just cracked tf up and was like wow, Mom must be really, really funny

- so y’know how Richie calls Eddie “my love” in the book, and is generally quite physically affectionate? He picks all that up from his parents, watching their example. Wants to make Eddie laugh like that

- for some reason I always imagine she speaks like, French or Italian fluently. I’m stealing @honeyreynolds hc that her maiden name is Avery for Tex Avery, but maybe her own mother was European. She tries to speak French with Richie as a baby/toddler so that he’ll be bilingual, and she’s so proud/frustrated because he’s clearly smart and has a knack for linguistic imitation, but his attention span is just. Non existent

- still makes lil kid Richie giggle by doing exaggerated Italian and making him guess what she’s saying

- I think she’s pretty elegant and reserved and almost shy on the surface with a rly wry sense of humour, so people tend to think she’s snooty, but she’s just... so concerned with keeping the peace and not saying anything bad about someone. Tries to see the best in people. This can lead to a lot of embarrassment when Went is so upfront and medical-frank about stuff or if Richie’s being a dumbass in public, but really she just envies their typically masculine lack of inhibition

- this is because she’s got this killer wicked streak. Maggie’s got a hidden well of scathing diatribes and Went knows it because

- they met on a plane in 1971 when Maggie was flying back to college for her final semester of senior year, and the man in the seat next to her started having an attack of some kind. The stewardesses appeal desperately for any doctors on board, nobody answers. Anyone at all? We’ll have to land the plane! Maggie’s trying to slowly shift away from this man and his spasms without seeming rude when she hears a deep sigh in the seat behind her and someone saying “I’m ethically bound to admit I have a licence in dentistry,” in a voice like he’s in on some joke nobody else knows.

- this guy unfolds the longest legs she’s ever seen and comes to squat right next to her and her apparently dying seat partner, she notices he’s nice looking and keeps glancing at her, there’s banter. Eventually he shrugs and is like “imo this man has a bad case of wind.” And Maggie just TEARS Went a new one like oh nice diagnosis DOCTOR DENTIST where’s your seatside manner?!?! what kind of name is WENTWORTH anyway! and Went’s like 👀😳😍 and then the dying man lets out a giant fart and Maggie recoils, all her pretty poise and indignation turning to base disgust and Went bursts out laughing and offers her the seat next to him

- turns out his first residency is in the next town from Maggie’s college. She’s only dated preppy meatheads before who only ever tried to flatter her and stopped listening when she talked about her music theory degree or the books she likes. But Went always grins and side-eyes her and cranks the volume whenever Maggie May comes on the hits station, because then she’ll whack him with a book. She’s so SWEET he loves goading her into releasing some more of that plane rage, like one day she’s prowling on the edge of a rant about her TA and trying to be reasonable. Went’s like, do it. You’ll feel better. So she fuckin rants her head off for ten minutes until her hair’s all dark and wild like an Arthurian queen and she looks over at Went reclining all impressed on her dorm bed and he’s like. I have never been more in love in my life. Can you sit on my face and make fun of my name again

- so yeah they’re both like, quietly distinguished and outwardly calm model citizens of Derry but in private Went is the fuckin roastmaster and is Maggie’s outlet for frustration whenever housewife suburbia gets too much

- I always picture her as having dark and quite curled hair, sort of Lauren Bacall eyes, and she’s probably tall too. Like 5’8 to Went’s 6’0 or 6’1 which is why Richie turns out to be 6’2 lmao. A family of giants. Honestly the whole time I was writing the Dilfworth fic I was imagining Mary Elizabeth Winstead, that’s my early-30s Maggie that Went is so excited to come home he’s stocking up on condoms. God I bet she’s got some of those single dark beauty mark freckles on her stomach 🥵 Wears hats with big brims. Sundresses. Secretly likes to pretend she’s on a mysterious trip to Rome as she sits in the park watching Richie catch dragonflies. Maybe when she’s older and Richie’s a teenager she looks kinda like Olivia Williams, bc I’ve had a big milfy thing for her ever since she was the mother in the 2003 Peter Pan.

- most kids in Derry have a crush on either Richie’s mom or dad or both and this is unfortunately quite damaging to his self esteem, even though Maggie INSISTS he’s just so handsome. She hates seeing him so insecure

- she tried pot once in college and hated it. The only times she comes close to getting hammered is on book club wine because it’s the only way she can get through them asserting the female orgasm doesn’t exist, then she comes home mildly tipsy and joins in on Went and Richie’s raucous game of cards

- felt a bit left out when Richie was small, with how well Went was able to go along with the silliness. Went sees this and gets Richie to make up a game where she’s Queen Margaret of the Tozier Court and made Richie a knight. They all spoke in bad Medieval Voices all afternoon, and it becomes one of those super long-running family jokes, and Maggie still feels all happy inside whenever Queen Margaret comes up

- ruthless decision maker!!! She had to be, because Went’s so laidback he’s horizontal and is always like “idc what we do as long as you guys are chill” and Richie can’t concentrate long enough to pick what colour gumball he wants, so she has to be staff sargeant. They go to Disneyland and she’s like C’MON BOYS HUP HUP HUP and Went’s like “oh cripes son we’re being hustled!!” but they love it as much as she loves them doing what she says

- great cook because of her indeterminidely Mediterranean mother.

- she genuinely wants to understand Richie’s strangeness but is also stumped as to what to do to bond with him, since she can only think of things she’d do with a daughter. She WANTS to brush Richie’s curls and bake with him but she thinks he wouldn’t like it, so they stick with singing. Is delighted when Eddie very politely and very intensely asks for her help making Richie a birthday cake. She sees how different they are together, and remembers Richie coming home at 5 years old declaring he was gonna marry Eddie Kaspbrak when he grows up, and she thinks... well, if I must have a son-in-law, I would love this one as much as I love my son.

#maggie tozier #richie tozier #wentworth tozier #ficlet

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thatsystemerror · 4 years ago

Text

the best things about Outer Banks

*spoilers ahead*

Holy hell, this turned out so long. I decided to make a second post solely dedicated to quotes because I just could not fit that in here anymore. I guess it speaks for this show that I had enough material to make two... Anyways, enjoy!

pt.2 - The Best Quotes From OUTER BANKS

NOT the pace at which John B and Sarah’s relationship develops

noT AT ALL

sorry, done with the venting now

anyhow, the group being TIGHT ™

JJ making you feel one of three ways:

“oh heLLO, JJ” (mostly without a shirt scenes)

“ugh, JJ” (he brought the gun and/or is being a dick scenes)

“awww, JJ...” (you know which scenes)

Kie’s outfits

the golden hour lighting

the sets being actual houses

the beach/sea/surfer aesthetic

the van

The Chateau™

JJ’s rings

Pope’s contributions being overlooked, always

everyone’s motivation on this show: “How much?” “400 mill”

conclusion: that’s worth fucking shit up

Kie actually being really skilled in politely but determinedly shutting her guy friends down when “macking” on her

ya know, until the Pope pity party at the end...

cuz that’s what it felt like, for real

I actually thought JJ and Pope might have a thing going...

the soundtrack full of surf guitar music

the intro font always making it feel like some 90s Miami-set crime show is about to start

John B’s hair, I think?

I mean, I don’t know what you’re into...

I just feel like it’s a breath of fresh air on the boy’s-hairstyles-tv-landscape

getting major “Don’t Breathe” vibes from the blind old lady shooting up her house

I appreciate them trying to make her actually kinda creepy, because they usually fail miserably with "scary” elements on non horror stuff

I don’t know if you catch my drift, just thought it was well done...

Sarah getting stung by a jellyfish and everyone just like not really caring??

all of them thinking for even oNE SECOND that they weren’t gonna get screwed over with the gold

JJ looking like the lead of any 90s teen production at all times

JJ just effortlessly blending in with the waiters at the party

or that time when he fake cried on command to save his ass

but like every character has good acting skills (or simply is a good liar, I guess it’s a matter of philosophy)

JJ and Pope betting money on Kie and Sarah

Kie starting a fire to save everyone’s ass

the Vlad and Val thing (cheesy for sure, but adorbs nonetheless)

highkey though the guy playing the drug dealer is a really good actor, cuz I’m sure he’s nice and cool and all irl but as Barry all he makes me think of is this:

Topper’s Frosted Tips™ (gosh that sounds so unbelieveabley sexual I can’t believe it’s not sexual)

JJ constantly trolling every authority figure

Sarah not being the perfect-snobby-rich-chick-daughter despite being expected to be by everyone

JJ robbing the coast guard of a pen? because he ignored him

“bring it on Aggie, you bitch” sign (I don’t think stroms can read but nice touch)

especially the first few episodes finally being an accurate depiction of how teenage boys always wear their hat floating like 5″ above their head and hoW FUCKING DUMB IT LOOKS!!! thank you! please stop...

Pope loosing his pants at the cemetary (like imagine him having to explain that to his mama)

the “friends” awkwardly waving at Kie’s dad

that one silouette shot ✨cinematography, bitches✨

never actually seeing John B give the BMX bike back to that poor kid...

going back to save the Big John photograph from the street (tears, man... tEArS)

John B being a major wuss while Sarah is cleaning his wound

NEVER having the gun when actually needed

ALWAYS having the gun when it could get you in major trouble

JJ taking the blame to save Pope

JB’s finger guns after his first kiss with Sarah (John B you smooth mf...)

that opening shot in ep.4 zooming in on the boat through the storm clouds

everybody being collectively surprised to see JB in a school building

the blood splattering against the window of the car with JJ and his dad in it (terrible scene, A+ effect!)

JJ sneaking through the swamp with a backpack on his head

the actor of Sarah’s dad managing to give you the creeps with some subtle crazy eyes even before it turns out he’s actually crazy

Kie fooling Pope with her British accent

Rose thinking she’s some kind of High Priestess at the midsummers party

John B putting a bow tie on JJ

BROMANCE™ (alternative title)

JJ delivering the note dancing flirtatiously

Sarah thinking pushing John B down would magically have made him invisible to Topper watching them for thE LAST 5 MINUTES??!

JJ twirling Kie around when leaving the Kook party

Topper accidently confessing his creepy-stalker-love to a 13 year old

Kie slapping John B

John B slapping Kie

violence is not the answer, kids! but I guess these were friendly slaps, so it’s okay

JB telling Sarah how “everything’s fine” with the Pogues and then cutting to it being definitely not

John B saying: “I don’t give a shit if she’s an axe murderer” and Pope making this face: 😲

a brilliant plan being ruined by a porch light

everybody constantly shitting on 1... 2... 3!

is that a The Shining reference I’m seeing????

how tf did it take them so long to realize she’s blind I-

and then once they did, Sarah states: “that bitch can’t aim” ???

like yeah, obviously, you just said it yourself sHE’S BLIND!!!????

anywho, John B not even bothering to fake excitement over the fishing trip

JJ finding “that’s what she said” disproportionately funny

the group wordlessly agreeing that somebody should probably look after JJ at the drug dealer’s

Sarah confidently telling JB she’s a virgin without it being all awkward (rare sight in teen shows back in my day)

Pope’s “Thrasher” shirt (like damn that’s off brand, but funny!)

JJ getting floaties for drinks in the whirlpool

the Whirlpool Group Hug™

JB telling Sarah goodbye before the fishing trip and me deadass thinking for a sec that he set an alarm to creep into his gf’s room in the middle of the night

Ward having sOmE NErVE to interrogate JB after killing his father (and later basically calling Rafe a psycho?!! like bitch get a mirror and baptized, thank you)

John B driving through the fence at the airport

Sarah yelling at her dad “you’re gonna kill him” like that’s gonna stop him lol

the cop at the airport giving us real talk about what police first aid training probably looks like

JB wanting to tell the cops what happened out of the goodness of his heart

Wheezie sticking up for her sister

Rafe calling John B a maniac (the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree, I see)

JB locking himself in, in a house with Topper (like god damn, Karma’s a bitch huh)

Sarah, a teenage girl mind you, getting away from a trained-special-force-FBI-whatever-cop-dude in full armor by KNEEING him

Rafe talking to his Emotional Support Dealer™

the Pogues standing up to their parents for frIEnDsHIp!!!

JJ about to play “Operation” on his dad to get the keys

the missed opportunity to use “I Shot The Sheriff” on the soundtrack

I’m still a bit salty....

JB getting out of the cop car like that’s just normal

Pope going to shake Kie’s hand to make up

Sarah making it just in time

Ward being the “final card” lmao

Pope’s fam taking JJ into their group hug

the chill fisherman dude (with a wild romantic past?) taking in JB and Sarah

I demand a spin-off for that guy’s story btw

I’m so sorry for how long this must’ve taken to read. Seems like a good time to remind you that there’s more though:

pt.2 - The Best Quotes From OUTER BANKS

It’s a great show (even though in parts I would’ve preferred them to step off the cheese grater a little bit). Overall (aside from the obviously heavy themes), it reminds me of all the Australian teen shows I used to watch growing up (mixed with “the Outsiders” maybe?) and it makes me actually a bit excited for summer.

And I hate summer, so that’s saying something!

@thatsystemerror

the best things about - masterpost

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selfcareparker · 4 years ago

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LMAOO I WAS GONNA BRING UP FALCON AND THE WINTER SOLIDER BUT I WASNT SURE IF YOU WERE WATCHING IT HSKAJ (are you liking it? i know it’s only the first episode but ya know, another one tomorrow night- well tomorrow night for me, and did you like wandavision?? i loved it!!)

oh my goodness i’m watching lion king while writing this and i haven’t seen it in a while and i am..... emotional. but anyway, i love that streaming services think that imma pay for them while they charge $50 a month. like yes of course i have that kind of money and i am going to give it to you to watch tv 🙄 that $50 is budgeted to sims thank you. (ALSO SIMS!!! i’ll get to that in a minute) now see if i don’t google levidia right this minute LMAOO, not that i’m gonna use it.. just for the research...

AND HDKSHS SEND THAT CHAOS WALKING LINK LMAO i saw it for the third time with a different one of my friends and she wasn’t the best one to see it with? she literally was on her fucking phone and i was like ok whatever her loss not mine, and idk if you’ve read the books or if you’ve seen it by now, but by the end of the whole movie, after they’ve confirmed THE THING throughout the whole movie she asked the dumbest question and i’m like diD YOU NOT WATCH THE MOVIE, and i guess she didn’t. so. this sounds so vague but i don’t wanna spoil the movie for you just in case lol.

THE STORY LMAOO, so A DIFFERENT FRIEND LOL, like my oldest bff, we had a day together and we wanted to go see chaos walking. and i honest to God thought that no one would be seeing this movie. like NO ONE. every day, i checked the theater seating and no one was there right? plus i really wanted us to have the theater to ourselves. so we sit in the wrong seats, the row in front of us, STILL THINKING WE’RE ALONE. and then these 3 older people came in AND IM ABOUT TO SCREAM FHSJSH AND IM LIKE “are we in your seats?” and they we were like uh yeah, AND IT WAS SO BAD LMAOO , we’re moving and everything would’ve been FINE but my friend’s reclined seat was going down so slow and as it’s going shes LITERALLY SAYING ALOUD “awkward awkward awkward” so she thinks forget it, lemme just get up. HER BAG GETS CAUGHT ON HER CHAIR AND HER FRIES AND THEY SPILL ALONG WITH HER HONEY MUSTARD 😭😭 ALL OVER THE FLOOR! so i’m trying not to laugh lmao but those aren’t even our seats and we just made a mess, so naturally, i get on the floor and start cleaning it up with my napkins (this is going for too long) AND MY FRIEND IS STILL SAYING “awkward awkward awkward awkward” and i’m really abt to crack up bECAUSE LIKE SHUT UP HAHAHA and we’re cleaning it and shit and the oldest lady is gonna say “yeah you’re not gonna make an old lady get on the floor, are you?” AND I WANTED TO LAUGH AND SCREAM AT THE SAME TIME BC DID WE ASK YOU TO, NO, so then i had to get the manager and she helped us clean it, we got new fries and everything was fine, it’s just a crazy story bc LITERALLY WE COULDVE AVOIDED IT AND EVERYTHING BUT THESE ELDERLY PEOPLE HAD TO COME AND SEE THIS MOVIE😭😭 at least the gentlemen was nice.. he helped us clean. but then his wife was like “i aM nOt siTTiNg tHeRe” and at first i thought she was a teenager bc of her stink attitude but her husband was nice. and it’s not like we weren’t cleaning it up, we were!!! like i was so apologetic- anyway.

about sims! do you play console or pc? wait,, you already told me you play pc bc your computer was broken, i’m glad you can play now though :’)) litetally when i read in the tags that you’re playing sims !!!! and are you hyped for bunk beds? i have cc so i’ve had them for a bit, but they were glitchy... but i’m so excited we have them now! i should really play sims today...

GURL IM SO PROUD OF YOU 🥺🥲 i know you aren’t fluent in everything and you aren’t a linguistic genius LMAO but it’s still soooo amazing :’) here i am reading the captions while ur just going hahah, yea i tried duolingo but.... i didn’t stick to it HDJSH talking to you though makes me so interested because you know all these languages, not even studying them like that, but you have this foundation and ahh it’s just super cool. LOL YOU DONT SOUND LAME HAJA IM TELLING YOU ITS SO SO COOL, i’m loving this lesson btw oh my goodness- HSKAJS YOU THOUGHT I WOULD ALREADY KNOW THAT??? HDYSJHS MY ONLY ENGLISH SPEAKING ASS??? HAHAHAHHAH i find that word (Rindfleischetikettie- i’m not gonna write the whole thing i’m sorry) very interesting... like... wow. did you have to google that or did you just know lmao

OKAH THE WATER THING HDKDJDKS UR GONNA TERRIFY ME HAHAH OH MY LORD- first of all CROATIA 😍😍 but thinking about it like that, I WOULD FREAK OUT TOO HAHSGSG i never go that deep into the water, or if i do i have my dad with me lol and i kind of hold onto him bc ive seen/heard too many things about people being dragged into the sea. but i loveee the water (i wanted to be a mermaid soooo bad ohmigosh)

I DONT UNDERSTAND HOW ONE CANNOT LIKE MUSIC ITS AWFUL !! lmao yeah i haven’t even listened to harry’s his first album, everyone says they love it more. I WAS GONNA SAY IMMA LISTEN TO ONLY ANGEL BUT THE WAY YOU DESCRIBE IT HUHAHAH also i have never listened to anything by mgk (i actually had to google who he was IM SORRY😔) i’m tempted to listen tho lol PLEASE JUSTIN BIEBER- I PROMISE IM NOT LAUGHING AT U IVE JUSY NEVER HAD SOMEONE SAY THAT B4!! like i don’t know many people who’ve liked him bUT NOW IM GONNA LISTEN & the cardboard cutout- okay. 😭😭😭

oh my goodness to see the vamps live 🤧 TO SEE ANYONE LIVE PLEASE JJDGSHAHGD and little mix is so good oh my goodness- i actually haven’t been to that many concerts.. i was at my first one, elsie fest (it’s like a broadway thing really) in uhhh october of 2019, yea i took my mom for her birthday bc she loves darren criss and i’m obsessed with glee lmao OH MY GOODNESS YOUVE BEEN TO SO MANY!!! and those are such great artists 😩😩

LMAO UR FINE, hamilton is a musical that lin manuel miranda wrote and i think generally made? i’m obsessed, but basically it was on broadway and then recorded and put on disney+ ... idk i guess it counts a film bc it’s like a movie really cuz it was recorded but in what 2018 or 2016? i don’t remembers the date that is on disney+ but it’s strange how i got into it, a lot of my friends were obsessed and i was like uhh why? and while researching it and watching it, trying to figure out why people love it... i fell in love with it LMAO but the music is FANTASTIC and lin is incredible😭 but yes yes yes i loveeeee high school musical!! my dad actually took my cousins to see it on ice or something (i absolutely forget lmao) but i don’t know how people don’t know hsm. it upsets me.

OKAY IM DOWN TO THE BOTTOM HAHAHA (it takes me so long to respond, now i’m on lion king 2 WHICH IS SO GOOD PLEASE FHHSSHHSHSH) i could respond in chunks but i kind of enjoy responding like this? it feels a bit like a letter but if this whole thing is overwhelming i’ll cut it up lol

+ yes that was me about your fic and sleep and everything lol but it was so good😭 i don’t understand how you write peter so well like you have this ability to capture his.. everything? i’m crine. all the time. over your fics. & i cannot describe my happiness for youuuu :’) i’m so happy you’re writing again 🥺🥰 the thing about how you only want to write the long peter fic but you don’t know how to continue... i feel that so so so hard, i don’t think i told you but ughh i was so blah bc of that feeling of having pent up inspiration for only one fucking thing and not being able to write it. it’s so frustrating 😭

not to add more to this but i need to vent a bit? the situation is definitely different bc with your major it obviously requires for you to ya know, know english lol, but uhm bc i’m homeschooled ive been cheating on all my work SHSHDHSJ like i google the answers but i’m still learning! it’s just..... i find it so unnecessary, like going for an audition no one is gonna say to me “i want you to chanel the knowledge within yourself of the centripetal force of the circle that is the table on this stage” like tf??? there’s literally no point. i’m gonna be getting into voice lessons again soon and i’m already doing dance, AND i’ll be doing this summer camp program (more hamilton lol) and thinking about school is only making me stress more, like i haven’t been able to rehearse dance at all this week bc of it...... so

hahaha reading your tags, lonely anon would still be accurate HAHAHHAHA // another add: yea i love ur current theme, i’ve gotten used to “seeing you” like this, but anything will look super pretty :)) ALSO HOW IS IT STILL SNOWING THERE, i swear it’s getting warmer and warmer by the day here 😭🤧

these long ass posts, my gosh🥲 lonely lovely anon <3

Omg yes it does feel like a letter sldkdj and then the few days of waiting also make more sense okay i love this ❣️💕❤️💓❤️💞🧡💜💘(wtf)sksjhz

Dear lovely anon,

ALSKSJVKD yes i‘m liking falcon and winter soldier dlkdh i haven‘t watched the second episode yet but i‘ll watch it tomorrow! but i didn‘t watch wandavision........ eidislskks i was going to but idk i wasn‘t that interested in it and watching series is already too much of a commitment (what can i say i‘m a Sagittarius—🤧 (no i’m joking i actually know NOTHING about starsigns)) didjj that i couldn‘t force myself to watch it, ALSO i hate (idk if this is an unpopular opinion) when every episode is like a whole hour. i‘m rewatching an old series today (it‘s german so i won‘t even get into it) and the episodes are 25 mins each and i‘ve already watched 8 episodes today ridlndjdjd,,, and i feel like if the episodes were an hour each i wouldn‘t have gotten past episode 2 today like idk.... even if series had the same length in total, i prefer when the individual episodes are shorter idk why tho tbh (so yeah i already wasn‘t 100% convinced about watching wandavision so i just couldn’t make myself watch a bunch of 1hour episodes— i‘ve heard that it‘s good tho- but i‘m not much of a series person so. Dldkk (have we talked about this already??? sorry i don‘t remember what i said lol and i couldn‘t find my own post anymore so dkdjsh) (WAIT I JUST CHECKED THE WANDAVISION EPIOSRDES ARENT EVEN THAT LONG??? Okay wait i might watch it now - did you like it? let me know if i should watch it— why did i think they were 60minutes???)

okay another confession i‘ve never watched the lion king????? i mean i watched it when i was a child but i was too young to actually pay attention to any kind of plot i just liked the songs lol sldkdj i‘ve been meaning to watch it for years tho 🦁 (idk it just felt appropriate to put a lion emoji lmoaoo)

OH MY GOD THE CHAIS WALKING/CINEMA STORY AHSJSKKS😭😭😭😭 NOOOOO (very fitting that there was so much chaos when you were watching a film that has chaos in the title loool) and the “awkward awkward awkward“ SAME SKSKSLSKDJ, that‘s literally me 24/7 ahajshshhshshsh. Like i was so skdjdjdkdllsldksnsnsnsb while i read what you sent me djslslsjdjdbdn why are old ladies always so grumpy btw 🥲🥲🥲 at least the man was nice tho! and wait did i read that right... you have fries (which, to me, are called chips dusuusldk) at your cinemas?? (Movie theatres sorry sksjsh) we just have popcorn and nachos and drinks i want chips too when i‘m watching a film what😭😭🥺🥺🥺🥺

Also i still haven’t watched it so thanks for not spoiling it!!! (idk when i’ll watch it i’m so bad with films and even worse with series💀💀💀- same with cherry. i literally forgot all about cherry, i was SO hyped when the trailer came out like i’ve never been so excited about a movie... and then it came out... and i still haven‘t watch it like what‘s wrong with me???? Dkdjdjdjdklsl i feel like i‘m not gonna watch it anytime soon tbh, but i wanna watch chaos walking i just have to find the time

Okay and @ your other friend who wasn‘t paying attention like why are you even watching the film then???? but ok (omg this sounds so mean i‘m sure she‘s very nice but in this situation just like❔❔❔)

SIMS ahhh, BUNK BEDS, ahhhh sdljdjdjdkdkdldksj i actually haven‘t played it since the update 🤧🤧 i made both of my sims (enisa (bestselling author already, thank you) and michael (aspiring doctor)) go to university and bro it takes so long 😭😭 and you can‘t do anything else if you want them to do well so literally the last three times i played sims i was just constantly clicking their homework and computerd to write their assignments (i play it in german so idk what its called on the sims) and do their presentations and do them all over again so that they get better or whatever for HOURS, but imma play again soon

also i‘m living my fanfiction life loool, so i made my two sims neighbours (on the same plot tho but i made two small separate houses lol, i still wanted to control both of them at the same time but i made sure they didn‘t interact before i wanted them to skdjdjdk). and first they both experimented and got some experience in the love department you know (all genders, cause i have to live my sexuality even in a pc game slskdjh— wait, i‘ve never lived my sexuality irl like i‘ve done NOTHING nothing with guys nothing with girls (🥲) but maybe that’s why i want to do it even more in the sims) and then they met at uni and realised like hey we‘re neighbours and now they‘re together (but michael accidentally had an alien baby with another woman (who was an alien which i was not aware of) cause i wasn‘t paying attention like i said woohoo not try for baby like michael why is your pull out game so weak tf LSHDDHDJDJSKKDKSKDKS okay but making out and flirting and doing all the fun stuff in the sims turns me on way more than it should PFAHAHHAHSH) so idk why i told you this but I’m creating that neighbour!au in the sims lmaoooo

i did not have to google Rindfleischetikettierungsüberwachungsübertragungsaufgabengesetz (just did it again😌 sisjshhs) but i might have mixed up the words überwachung und übertragung or i might have even forgotten a word skskks but in the end it doesn‘t matter (by linkin park- ok i‘m so sorry it‘s 2 am and i have a headache from having waveformers in my hair all day but i still wanted to reply to this now so sorry if i‘m not making any sense right nowbahahshah)

i wanted to be a mermaid too dldjdksksj like h2O and all those series convinced me i could be one like. i remember i‘d always go in the deep pool and attempt to swim like them in all the series with that wave motion i must have looked so crazy with my goggles as well dkdjsksöksj (i was like twelve but still)

so mgk has two sides one is hip hop/rap which is like ~~~~ idk he has good and bad songs, but his latest album is like punk pop snd I LOVE IT SO SO SO SO SO MUCH, so if you like punk pop I’d recommend his album tickets to my downfall (i don‘t blame yoj if you don‘t like it tho like about a year ago i would have HATED that type of music dkdkdkkd)🥴

Okay talking about music, there‘s this german rapper and he is... not a good person. he‘s literally a criminal and extremely sexist but to me he‘s still hot???????? he‘s even cute at times even tho he has tattoos everywhere and is like 6‘5 and is super aggressive but i see him and i‘m like 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 my heart beats only for you💘💘💘💘and he released a new song today and i watched the video and i‘m wondering wtf is wrong with me 😃 (he did look particularly cute cause he was high so idk he wasn’t really aggressive in this one) 😭 so i thought i‘d share that LMAO IDK

(not saying tattoos aren‘t cute btw i LOVE tattoos imma get some soon, but you know he looks like someone your grandma would be afraid of (and in his case rightfully so💀)

okay wait i‘m getting so tired it‘s 2 am i think i‘ll have to do the rest tomorrow but i wanted to do it now😭🥺🥺 see you tomorrow

it is now 3:42 am and i couldn‘t sleep so here we go again

girl you can laugh at me for liking justin tho skskks i wanna laugh at myself idk, like i said i really really really liked him a few years go, basically my life was at least 50% justin and then he went on a break for a while and released an album last year which i hated 🥴 but this album is wow. (Still weird to me because it‘s literally the definition of pop and i don‘t ever listen to pop?) and it‘s so weird because i used to know so much about justin and had so many friends who loved him as well and now it‘s like I’m listening to someone new? Don‘t get me wrong i never KNEW justin and i never will and i‘m aware of that shahsh but yeah i used to be soooo used to him and it‘s like reconnecting with an old friend and you realise you don‘t know that friend anymore- like you don‘t know them anymore at all. I mean justin is weird nowadays 😂😂😂 so pls laugh at me tbh dskksjsjsh

awww it‘s so wholesome that you gave your mom tickets to the concert 🥺🥺🥺🥺 i gave my mum tickets for pink like 2 years ago and she loved it so much and i was like 🥰🥰🥰 (i went with her) AND OMG GLEE ok so unfortunately i barely remember glee, but i used to watch it too!!!! And it‘s actually on my list of series i wanna watch (again) so youre making me want to watch it even more (but like i said i‘m bad with series so 😩😩😩 who knows when i‘ll rewatch it)

When all this pandemic shit is over (let‘s be hopeful <3333) then you need to go to as many concerts as possible!!!!! i‘ve been to SO MANY and it‘s literally one of the things in my life i‘m the most grateful for, concerts are some of the best experiences i‘ve ever had in my life especially the ones that are in smaller concert halls where you can feeeel the vibe and everyone‘s energy (and that sounds awful thinking about it mid-pandemic 😐) anyway—

Okay omg you‘re absolutely making me want to watch hamilton right now like omg i WANT TO WATCH IT NOW but it‘s 4 am sodndkdldl

what you said about my peter fics🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺like omg i love these emojis they literally just describe how i felt when reading what you said so, yes, 🥰🥺 + thank you :) it really means a lot <3

and no omg i totally get the studying thing. like last year before i graduated .. was that last year? yes wtf omg okaykdjdj, so the last three months before i had my final exams we were just in a lockdown and we didn‘t even have online classes. We had nothing except one teacher who left our group chat (😭) because she was mad at us (?) and one maths teacher who did an online ““lesson““ once a week. he‘d ask: so does anyone have questions. us: . Him: okay, bye then. So. Yeah dndldldj. But we had one online test and it was in german and like i read the book wee were supposed to read? but the questions on the test were all unanswerable (is that a word?) and i had to google everything (got an A tho 🤪 but only because i googled everything so i was so scared that i wouldn‘t be able to get a good result on the final exam because what if i‘d gotten used to just googling everything and i couldn‘t do it by myself anymore? anyway it was all fine in the end but yeah at times i couldn‘t even study because i had so much anxiety about studying and yeah- like this whole annoying cycle. but you said you‘re still studying———- okay wait 👁👄👁 i forgot what i was going to say??????????????????????????????????????????????????? Like wtf. Is wrong with me? And i‘m reading what you wrote again and i just don‘t know what i was going to say? Like i get what you‘re saying obviously but i‘m like? Idk 4am brain ayeee, please vent more if you need to and elaborate further because right now i‘m???? Too dumb to respond to this right now wtf. I‘m so sorry lmao ddlkdjdjd what is even going on like i‘m sitting here open mouthed just like ? But btw the fact that you have Voice and dance lessons is like SO FUCKING COOL like oh my god that is sosososos cool wtf, i was thinking that when you first talked about it too

And “i want you to chanel the knowledge within yourself of the centripetal force of the circle that is the table on this stage” ODHDKSLDBDJDOFIDKDNDLDK

Yes i know about the weather dkdkdkjd but it‘s getting (a lot) warmer here too and where i live we kind of get a weird type of wind called föhn (which literally means hair dryer but idk if that‘d the reason why it‘s called that, i‘m too tired to think of whether it makes sense rn) and it gives me headachesssssss and the changing weather is also giving me headaches 😭😭😭😭 so this season right now is just headache season and i hate summer so i wish it would just snow again lmao (okay it‘s getting so late that it‘s early already snd i can hear this bird chirping so fucking loud wtf i‘m also getting a headache 🤧🤧🤧) but at least i can do my new theme soon (i hope it‘ll look good🥺 and omg thank you for what you said about my current theme- i always feel like i‘m so bad with aesthetics, i obviously like my theme but i feel like every single person on tumblr has a theme that is prettier than mine so it was very nice to hear you say that you love it👉🏼👈🏼 (i‘m so used to it by now that i actually hate it lmao so it‘s getting yeeted soon and i‘m making megan thee stallion my pfp 🤪 (if the graphics and shit works out skdjdjdj)

#lovely anon #<333 #okay its so late now i dont wanna post it now in case i‘m too tired to notice losds of mistakes #but i also wanna post it now so.#*loads #i‘m posting it #and i absolutely do not mind if you answer like this!!!! but if you ever do feel like it‘s too much or you uust want to respond to one thing #in particular sooner then pls go ahead! <3

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anonymous-pretzel-3 · 5 years ago

Text

So much has happened in the past week, idk how to keep up mentally, emotionally, and all the other "-ally's" anymore (not that I knew how to be fore, but 🤷🏽‍♂️)

I don't have the spoons to go through a full rundown of everything that's happened, but here's a basic outline I may expand on later:

I had therapy last Tuesday and talked about my sudden spike in feelings of wanting to leave this God forsaken hell that is my parents' house again and how I figured out a way I might want to talk to them about it without actually burning any bridges if and when I was granted the opportunity

Literally only a couple of hours later, my mother decides it's ok to spank my brother again (over him cutting up some paper my baby sister drew on for our godsister because it was her birthday that day or something like that)

My dumbass decided to take this opportunity to do something I knew was going to get me into this kind of trouble and fucking did it anyway (i.e. confront my mother about it)

*cue her threatening to punch me, shoving me into a wall and basically pinning me there while acting like she's about to physically hurt me while screaming in my face about how I can't tell her how to raise her children and calling me and my friends some names and bla bla bla trauma trauma trauma*

It was 9:30 at night, so when my mother told me to get out of her face, I grabbed my drawstring bag that holds all of the stuff I usually carry around with me everywhere these days, and I left and spent the night at a friend's house who I didn't know was also mid breakdown because of stress

That night their boyfriend (who is also a mutual friend) and another mutual friend also spent the night because they were helping to provide emotional support and stuff because everyone was having a shitty night (the other two are also dating and had some sort of important conversation too that I technically don't really know how well that went, but they're still talking and together I think)

I spent the rest of the next day internally freaking out at work because I had to go home that night and face whatever consequences for my actions were going to be, and since nothing like this has ever happened before, I didn't know what to expect

Forgot my mother had class Wednesday nights, so we set a time to talk the next day

According to my sister and the way I read all the adults' actions and what they said, they weren't overtly angry and no one has threatened to hurt me or kick me out yet, so I guess that's something?

Thursday morning I had my psychiatry appointment before I got a chance to talk to my mother, so now I have to wait another week-2 weeks before I can see a professional about the result of this :')

I had the conversation with her after the appointment that has left me royally emotionally fucked up since

Still cannot sort through my fucking emotions and beliefs for the fucking life of me

Spent the night at a friends place again and all day Friday with friends

Had work on Saturday

Told my mother the complete truth for once Saturday night about where I was planning on going Sunday and morning before D&D and why for the sake of communication

Basically got told I was a bad person among other things, which is exactly why I never tell her jack shit

Helped my friend with some of our other friends clean their mom's house because their family was going to house a stray cat we found outside of my friend's place of work that Friday

Ended up taking the cat back with us because they and their boyfriend weren't confident they were going to be able to take care of them

(Cat ended up going with two of our other friends)

Had D&D and the DM called me a nazi for "talking bad about her friend (insert my name)" because I basically repeated that I was a bad person

(Still haven't stopped internally laughing about that tbh and still hate that it fucking works like how dare lmao)

(Seriously, when you have such a visceral reaction to being called a nazi in any context, including a joking one, because the thought is so horrifying, your brain automatically starts thinking good things about you instead on command because Fuck That Shit^TM)

Had work yesterday and got told by my boss that I need to work on getting faster (which duh, I know, but also how tf is he so nice about it and been so patient with me wtf)

Finally got confirmed today by friend who got me the job in the first place what I already knew all along: I'm probably going to end up losing my job because I'm not getting fast enough

(They still think I can improve and they still believe in me somehow which really means a lot to me, but still. Lowkey haven't stopped crying because of so many mixed emotions piling up)

I'm supposed to talk to another friend about what happened between me and my mom today, but that's probably not going to happen because lowkey avoiding replying to everyone because everything is too much especially since at the exact same time my friend was texting me about my job, another friend (and their boyfriend) was texting me about possibly letting me get an apartment or something with them and letting me pay less for rent

I simultaneously hate my life and love my friends so deeply that I'm being torn apart by these two emotions alone

I literally would probably be dead if it weren't for them, and I definitely would have been a lot worse off

Anyway, I gtg fold clothes now, but those are just some thoughts I needed to jot down real quick. And in case no one has ever told you:

Only nazis would say such cruel things about you that you tell yourself. Don't punch yourself in the face, but metaphorically punch that voice in the face and tell it to shut the fuck up because you're not a nazi. You're a beautiful and amazing human being, and God damn if you think I'm going to let you get away from the nazi metaphor lol Go find some self care and love yourselves 💜

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skizmin · 6 years ago

Text

Ravenclaw Woojin

genre: fluff of course, sorta?? enemies to lovers but?? not really???, an adamant y/n and a soft woojin,,,, none of the other members appear which i didnt even realise until i finished

okay so woojin is ravenclaws most trusted prefect as hes the eldest one and literally does The Most to make himself available for others

seriously once he asked the defence against the dark arts professor for a 2 week extension on his assignment so he could tutor 5 people for the upcoming charms exam

like,,,,,,,, damn

anyway so you actually do this extended course of charms, youre in the same class as woojin and for some reason??? the fact that hes so naturally good at it pisses you off

especially when youre falling slightly behind in that class

okay a LOt behind

your like,, only friend in that class is dropping it next term to focus on her divination classes and she doesn’t get it either but it doesnt affect her grades not nearly as much as it affects yours.

shes all “dude just ask for woojin to tutor you” and youre like

No NO no

no way are you being tutored by kim woojin. the idea just embarrasses you

you’re usually fine with getting help from peers but woojin?? everyone goes to him for tutoring and you sorta just dont??? wanna put yourself into that group???

you feel like it makes you inferior to him for some reason which is the worst feeling ever

(even tho you totally arent bc youre beating him in potions anyway)

anyway so its a wednesday morning and the class is about to end to allow the students to go have breakfast (you know how extended courses are out of normal school times ye??)

you’re tired as fuck

confused as fuck

hungry as fuck

everything as fuck

but then “y/n!” called you to your senses and you stopped packing your things

your professor had just called you up, an ancient tiny little man who was apart of the great battle of hogwarts some time ago

“yes sir?”

“come here would you?”

you shoved your ink jar into your bag and nodded, walking out from behind your desk and saying bye to your friend who was leaving already

god she really did hate this class you thought lmao

the majority of the students were still packing their things away in a slow drawl probably instigated by the dim, sleepy light of the chilly morning

“anything i can help you with?” you awkwardly asked your professor who smiled at you, stepping down from his place standing on books to look up at you

“yes actually, ive noticed you’re falling behind.”

you cringed, hard, not even wanting to turn around and see who was watching

“i suggest you get a tutor if you wanna get an A for this semester, y/n.”

“sir, i don’t have time to be tutored!”

“well then i guess you’re going to fail this course y/n. just be tutored enough to catch you up on the syllabus and then i can help you with the rest, okay?”

you internally groaned. this was bad

“you’re smart, it’ll only be about 2 weeks before youre caught up. im sure theres plenty of people that would tutor you.”

you nodded and politely fare-welled the teacher before turning to walk out of the classroom

the classroom was surprisingly empty, and you were happy to see that, not really excited about your professor sharing the fact that you were failing the course

sighing to yourself, you walked out of the door, planning to go meet your friends in the great hall

“hey! wait! y/n!”

you whipped around, half scared to death

the halls were practically empty yet

there was kim woojin

standing right next to the doorway you had just exited

your head tipped back. had he really been standing there the whole time?

“do you wanna meet tonight or something? we can go to the library?”

you gave him a pointed stare

“what? why?”

woojin was a little taken aback, he grew smaller under your gaze.

“oh, so i can- you know, tutor you? i heard you were behind by a bit.”

he looked almost embarrassed at how you were responding to his offer as you sharpened your gaze on him

“i dont need you to tutor me. i can find someone else.”

and with that you left a frowning, dumbfounded woojin standing in the hallway as you stalked off to the great hall

stupid woojin

who did he think he was asking you to meet him in the library

surely you can catch up on your own, you really dont need his help. you’re like, shaking your head lmao

smh

but anyway, the end of the day comes and you grab all these phat stacks of parchment and take you study charm books to the library and sit at the farthest ever table away from literally everyone

you start studying properties of all the spells youve learnt this second term

you get to the third spell, aparecium, one youve been having a lot of trouble remembering

you groaned, looking up in your book what exactly the spell meant and remembering it was in fact a revealing charm and you didnt have any pages with invisible ink on them.

you began flipping further into the book, trying to find the incantation for concealing ink writing so you could practise

“h-here.”

you fuCKING LEAPED IN YOUR SEAT

BITCH TF

THAT SCARED YOu oh my god what was he doing here

“s-sorry for scaring you b-but, its got concealed writing on it so you can, like- practise?”

he sounded sorta hopeful as he slid the paper over to you, hands nervously twining with each other in front of him afterwards

your pride was getting to you tho so

“i’m good at that spell, i don’t need to practise it.”

woojin blinked and squinted at you a little, trying to figure out whether or not you were lying

“ooookayyyy. anyway, anything else you want help with? i can explain it a little bit for you?”

you resisted the MASSIVE urge to roll your eyes at him

we get it, youre good at this

“im okay, thanks.”

you expect woojin to leave then, and it seems he does too as he stutters in his movement before clenching his eyes shut

“do you not l-like me or something? or did i-, did i do something to you?” he peeked an eye open to gauge your reaction

he looked almost

scared?

oh no, oh no

what was this guilt? you could feel your glare softening in an instant

why are you liKE THIS

“n-no! i dont!” you stuttered out a reply, eyes widening slightly

and then, he smiled. and he smiled wide

you felt blinded almost, your heart started palpitating. so this is what it was like to have woojin smile at you, and you only.

you were fucked

“oh! okay then! sorry i just-, i just thought i’d annoyed you or something so..” he trailed off, tapping his shoe on the ground suddenly very interested in the lamp on the library desk

“anyway!” he spoke up again. “i’ll uh, i’ll leave you to it. and don’t forget to practise aparecium. it’ll be on the next test for sure.” he grinned at you again and you sorta maybe might have felt heat crawling to your cheeks.

“t-thanks woojin.”

he nodded at you, still smiling before leaving

you banged your head on the table, what in the world was that interaction

whilst burying your face in your hands you noticed he had left the enchanted paper with you, you shrugged

might as well use it, right?

,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, shit

1 and a half hours later yu were groaning out of pure frustration with yourself. no matter how perfectly you practised the incantation or how directly you swished your wand at the page, nothing appeared

no writing or anything

you were beginning to wonder if woojin gave you the right piece of parchment, that this was the one with the invisible ink

you shook your head, looking at the clock closest to you and deciding it was too late to be studying and that your brain mustnt be working right,

you packed up your stuff and went back to your dorm, making sure to get as good a sleep as possible because you had another extension charms lesson tomorrow morning

,,,

anyway so you woke up late in the morning with a sore neck and red eyes.

this was Not Good

quickly tugging on your robes and frantically shoving things into your bag whilst brushing your teeth you rushed out of you dormitory and ran all the way to the charms classroom

you ran in out of breath, your professor looking at you with an unimpressed look. “glad to see you could make it y/n.” he drawled before turning back to the blackboard

you whined as you saw him writing a test warning for 2 weeks time, sleepily stumping your way over to your friend who was laughing at you loudly

unpacking your things, you glanced around the room. eyes landing on woojin who had a hand resting under his chin staring right back at you

your cheeks went a bit red when he smiled at you, giving you a small wave before turning his head to the board again

your friend next to you shoved you a little bit, when your turned your head you face her she simply mouthed an i saw that

you rolled your eyes and paid attention to the rest of the lesson without any distractions

anddddd thennnnnn it was over

you blinked, your notes were cleaner today than usual

“hey, y/n!” you looked up to find woojin standing in front of your desk, toothy grin on his face as per usual

your heart sorta skipped a beat before you were able to tell it not to

“hey woojin :))” you smiled, trying your best to sound friendly whilst not looking like an absolute fool

he sorta squinted at you a bit before “so uh, how was studying?”

it was your turn to look at him sceptically this time

“it was,,,,,, good??” you questioned, unsure of how to respond

woojins smile sorta falters before coming back with a somewhat sad lilt to it

“ah, right. well i gotta go. my friends are waiting.” and with that he nodded at you and left

you were confused as fuck

well, that was certainly weird

anyway, for the next week and 3 days, woojin completely avoided you

you’d be fine with this of course if you hadnt gotten that little soft spot for him a while back

it sorta hurt when your smiled at him and he sorta just sadly smiled back and looked away, or if you were gonna say hi to him he’d scurry away before one word could leave your mouth

you were really down about it honestly

bUT you also didnt have time to worry about it

your test was in FOUR. DAYS.

AND you had studied everything else to the best of your ability apaRT from the revealing charm, aparecium.

you wanted to cry, no one could explain it well enough to you and you could say the incantation right bc everyone spoke too fast and apparently you had to use it MULTIPLE times on the tes to maKE QUESTIONS APPEAR.

QUESTIONS

INVISIBLE QUESTIONS THAT COUNT TOWARDS YOUR MARK

basically, you were having a mental breakdown and you knew there was only one person left to try and explain it to you

kim woojin

again, he was A V O I D I N G Y O U

which made you angry bc you neED TO GET AN A

anyway, so your class on a tuesday was an afternoon class and you sorta just planned to corner him there after class

flitwick usually left 10 minutes early to arrive at his choir practises on time and put a charm on the door so no student could leave early

so the time comes, the bells ring and students rush out of the class you go and lie in their beds or whatever most teenagers do nowadays

and you make your way over to woojin’s desk as he packs up his things, he was always the last to leave

you coughed to get his attention, when he looked up his eyes widened

“i need your help.” you stated, eyes boring into his, you could swear you saw pink flush over his cheeks

“im uh, im busy. sorry y/n-”

“just one charm? please? i really need it, no one else can explain it.”

woojins eyes softened and he bit his lip. he was contemplating.

“okay.” you smiled at him widely “lets try now, okay?”

you nodded, placing you bag down and grabbing out some enchanted pieces of parchemnt, including the one he gave you

you sat down next to him and he look confused

“whats the paper for?”

“the aparecium charm.” you replied simply, turning to face him

a look of realisation dawned over his face

“i thought you said you were good at that charm?” he muttered

you looked at him weird, why was he acting so strange?

“i lied, i didnt want help back then but i do now. so,”

and then he grinned widely, taking a piece of paper that wasnt the one he gave you and telling you to watch closely

“aparecium.” he said, clearly. swishing his wand almost expertly

you looked at the paper in front of you and saw the writing of hello appear on it in your cursive handwriting

you looked up at him in aw.

“can you say it again? slowly? i dont think im pronouncing it right.”

woojin giggled

G I G G L E D

and repeated himself, clear and slow. you nodded at him, taking a random piece of paper and clearing your throat

“wait!” woojin yelped “use this one!”

you furrowed your brows as he shoved the piece of paper he gave you in the library in front of you

“uh, okay?” you replied, glancing up at his smile

clearing your throat again, you swished you wand and spoke clearly. “aparecium.”

nothing happened to the paper and you groaned loudly

“oh, y/n, your pronunciation is perfect. its the swish thats wrong.”

you bored your eyes into him “what?”

“youre doing it this way. youre supposed to do it this way” he flourished his wand to demonstarte to you the wrong doing

you still furrowed your brow, not really seeing the difference between the two

“here, i’ll show you”

o hMY GOD HE

HE JUST GRABBED YOUR HAND HOLY SHIT

SIRENS CALL THE AMBULANCE

YOU REALLY ALMOST CHOKED ON AIR

suddenly you felt fire all over. red surely covering your face as you tried to concentrate but holY SHIT

“okay so youre going like this.” he moved your hand in his own, making out the movement you made before

“but you should be doing this.”

o h

ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh

now you get it

you wanted to bang your head on the table for being so dumb about it

“oH RIGHT! woojin you’re literally a life saver!”

he laughed again, retracting his hand from yours as red splashed over his cheeks and onto his ears

“well, go on! try it!

you smiled, looking down at the paper and saying a strong and clear incantation whilst moving your wand exactly how woojin showed you to

you squeALED in excitement as ink dotted onto the page!

you grabbed woojin by the forearm and raised it above both of your heads in celebration

he laughed and cheered along with you before you settled down, beginning your massive thank you speech.

“seriously i couldnt have done it without your help i could have faile-”

“y/n, read it.” woojin smiled at you

“what?” you replied, confused

“read the parchment.”

eyebrows furrowing once again you looked down at the parchment with now visible ink

do you wanna maybe go to hogsmeade with me this weekend?

your eyes widened

no way

no way no way no way

you snapped your eyes up to meet his

this is why he avoided you! he thought youd rejected him in such a selfish cold hearted way!

“i’ve uh, actually liked you for a while. we missed last weekend but im down to go next weekend if you want?”

“i- i, i mean, y-you! of course! i’ll go with you, yeah! oh my god i am so sorry you mustve thought i was such a bitch i shouldnt have lied im an awf-”

oh my fUCKING GOD

CODE FUCKING RED HIS HANDS WHERE ON YOUR CHEEKS

AND HIS LIPS ON YOURS

BREATHING? WHOS SHE

your eyes clenched shut as you reached to grab the front of his robes, kissing him back

you felt so goddamn dizzy, your mind cloudy at the absolute bliss of the feeling of his lips and how they moved against yours

he started smiling against you and had to pull away, his eyes glimmering and heart beating out of his chest

“i’ll pick you up at your dorms at 10, okay?”

god, youve never smiled harder.

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kpopbread · 7 years ago

Text

Nct Dream reaction: you’re the clumsiest shit to ever have stepped foot on Earth

Request: hiii~ i really liked your clumsy reaction with nct can you do one for dream?

This was a surprise to see that people liked the first one! I will try hard with this one though it probably won’t be as good LOL

Read part one: click dis

(Credit to gif owners)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Mark & Haechan:

The original was Nct 127 and I included these two guys. You can read it here: Mork and Diva

Renjun:

Despite you being severely absentminded you did somehow manage to be a pretty decent cook. Even if you did manage to set an entire kitchen cabinet on fire- that was only twice though.

So being a good friend of our fellow neighborhood moonmin stan you were assigned the difficult task of..... baking his birthday cake. Yeah. And you were freaking the hell out.

You tried your ABSOLUTE HARDEST not to fuck it up. After 3 stressful hours of concentration and tears you finally finished without wrecking it. You got the candles ready and on the count of 3 you proceeded into the living room for Renjun’s surprise.

‘Wow, I haven’t even dropped it yet!’ you beamed inside your head. But all good comes to an end as when you screamed “HAPPY BIRTHDAY IDIOT” to our boi the candle’s glow was quickly replaced with light smoke. Fuck. Your dumbass just blew out his candles.

*sigh* “well I guess I’m not getting a birthday wish this year.”

I would think that Renjun would normally be pretty patient with you. Apart from this one time.

He looked so disappointed in you and you legit wanted to disappear into thin air JUST LIKE THE FUCKING FIRE ON THE CANDLES HHHSHHSSHHS

Jeno:

I think Jeno would lightly poke fun at you for being clumsy.

For example you two would be hanging out, probably watching bee movie or something, then out of nowhere- this fucker decides to give you a cringe attack

“Hey, do you remember that time when you ppffft -you went to meet me after school and you- you hugged that random teacher instead of me baHAHA”

Hearing him laugh about you like that made you want to punch him in the throat BUT you tried to keep a calm nature.

“We do not speak of that time”

“A-and, he ran away and almost hit that random student sjsjdhs”

By this point, you decided- heck, what tf is calm anyway

“JENO YOU ASS I SAID WE DO NOT SPEAK OF THAT TIME”

You would push Jeno to the side, trying your hardest not to erupt into laughter.

“Asdfjsjsjdjdjdjdj JENO shut up already omg”

Jaemin:

For Jaemin, I don’t think he would really pay attention until someone else pointed it out. After that he found himself notice every small mistake you made: he was shocked when he calculated that on average you drop something every 16 minutes like wow what

So today you were planning to scare Jaemin (for the banter you know). You decided to wake up extra early just so you could catch him off guard at practice.

But obviously, something had to go wrong right?

You stood outside the practice room patiently, completely alert and awake. Just as a figure appeared from the door, you screamed “BOO” but you got more of a shock than Jaemin did.

“ARGHHH WHAT THE HECK”

What? That ain’t Jaemins voice.

As Taeil slowly turned his head in your direction, one hand clutching his chest in shock, you probably had the biggest jumpscare of your life

“SHIT OMG” you blurted out as you yeeted down the corridor like you were an Olympic sprinter.

“What the fuck just happened” Jaemin shot an inquisitive yet amused look at Taeil as he watched you scream down the corridor.

Chenle:

This dolphin ass probably screamed and cringed everytime you were clumsy

Like you two were most likely deaf now because of how many times he’s yelled

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAA”

“wheeee Chenle omg! I’m like deaf in my right ear now”

This was kind of a cycle: you do stupid shit, he screams. So now everytime you were over at the dorms the members would try their best to stay out of Chenle’s way if you were present lmao

He’s the sort of guy that would laugh at their friend failing at an easy activity. Tbh same. Like that one time you accidentally sent ‘#deezhoesaintloyal #shaggedyourmum’ to your nan and he LOST IT

“WHATTTATATATA HOW EVEN DID YOU ACCIDENTALLY DO THAT AHSHHSHS”

“ACTUALLY STOP”

U haven’t seen your nan since that incident. Legend has it she’s in the mountains running a camp for hoes to help them be loyal

Jisung:

This kid would just be utterly confused

Like how many times can you forget to save your pokemon game like no I don’t want to hear you rage about it no thanks

“Reason number 36 on why Nintendo needs to remind you every 5.4 minutes to save your game in very imperceptible ways-“

“Can you actually please stop now? It’s not like Nintendo would do that anyways- they’re too busy concentrating on a cardboard box.”

“Oh- shots fired! But fyi it isn’t just a cardbo-“

You were cut off by the smoke alarm echoing through the dorms.

“Shit!”

You and Jisung jumped up in sync and sprinted to the kitchen. Oh, shit. The fucking cabinet’s on fire again.

“DMSJSJDJSJSJSN JISUNG HELp”

He kinda just looked at you blankly, then proceeded to pull a ‘wtf’ face at you while grabbing his phone for blackmail material.

Extra:

Taeil’s soul leaving after you scared the life out of him

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Andddddd we’re done! Thanks for reading lads @taesdayoff hope you liked!

#nct reactions #nct dream #nct 127 #nct u #nct 2018 #nct scenarios #nct mark #nct haechan #nct renjun #nct jeno #nct jaemin #nct chenle #nct jisung #kpop reactions

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lattetimes · 7 years ago

Text

So How About Them New Episodes, Ammirite Ladies??

here’s what i thought of the new episodes via live reactions as i watching them!

overall, it was kinda underwhelming but there were parts that i really did like! and if you liked these episodes, that’s awesome!

MAYOR DEWEY WINS

was this title a reference to the movie/book John Dies at the End, cause if so then i’m shocked i caught that

apparently it is, would you look at that. btw i kinda liked the movie.

damn, Sadie took this hard. and Steven never told Lars’ parents. so i guess Sadie has to do that herself.

why tf does Steven care if Dewey wins?!

OH, IT’S BECAUSE HE DON’T WANT SHIT TO CHANGE AND HE THINKS HAVING A NEW MAYOR WOULD BE BAD WTF DEWEY DOES NOTHING

ok wow, there’s only 24 people in Beach City and he never noticed that Lars was gone!?

“is that why the donut shop was closed?”

“we’ll hire a new donut boy!” DEWEY. DUDE. ARE YOU FOR REAL?!

“high school mayor” lmao

how did he run unopposed for 10 years!?

LARS’ MOM KEEPS A SHITTON OF TOMATOES IN HER PURSE SHE READY TO THROW DOWN ALL THE TIME

i don’t like that Steven is so adamant on Dewey winning.

jesus, Steven, let Nanefua win. she’s obviously the better person for the job

“i’m done pointing my finger at you, and now i direct all my fingers on both my hands to the citizens” top 10 anime deaths

NANEFUA WINS, OH MY GOD YES

STEVEN, DUDE, REALLY?! LEAVE CONNIE ALONE!

“i don’t know what you’re talking about, but i need to get a new job” 2018 mood tbh

episode rating: 2 tomatoes out of 5. i can’t stand Steven in this episode at all. but hey, NANEFUA WON!!!!!!

RAISING THE BARN

....was Lapis’ main concern that Steven dropped his phone on Homeworld? not the fact that he was... idk... ON HOMEWORLD?!

ok Lapis is ready to bail immediately and tbh i dont blame her

did she just uproot the entire bard wtf?!

BARN THE DIAMONDS, BARN THE DIAMONDS, BARN THE DIAMONDS!

episode rating: 1.5 barns out of 5. BARN THE DIAMONDS, BARN THE DIAMONDS, BARN THE DIAMONDS!

GEMCATION

^ mfw Amethyst basically spat an egg out her mouth (it was kinda gross)

well. Greg got some kinda house.... still don’t get why the crew is so against having Greg get a house

also, where’s Peridot?

“remove all shoes before entering” Pearl fucking THROWS A RANDOM ASS PAIR OF SHOES

OKAY PEARL SCREAMING “PARTY GUY, NO!” WAS ACTUALLY KINDA FUNNY

S H O W M E P A R T Y G U Y Y O U C O W A R D S

“Steven, you should join me. become a raisin” ok Garnet

did. did Steven completely cut Garnet off as she was talking about Pink Diamond and the Gem War with the whole, “yeah, yeah, i get it, Mom. i already heard this story” kinda thing? B R U H that ain’t okay

AND GARNET JUST SHUTS UP AND WAS LIKE “good, you understand”

PEARL WAS GONNA STRAIGHT UP ADMIT TO SOME HUGE THING AFTER HER “THERE ARE THINGS THAT ARE IMPOSSIBLE FOR ME TO EXPLAIN” LINE AND HE CUTS HER OFF WITH “CONNIE HATES ME”

WHY COULDN’T STEVEN AT LEAST TELL THESE FOUR THAT HE WAS SO WORRIED ABOUT CONNIE HATING HIM?!

I’M KINDA GETTING SICK OF SEEING STEVEN MOPE LIKE THIS FOR 3 EPISODES STRAIGHT AND I HOPE HE DOESN’T KEEP THIS UP FOR THE NEXT 2

OH NO, PLEASE DISREGARD ALL OF THE MESSED UP THINGS YOU SAW ON HOMEWORLD CAUSE CONNIE IS (rightfully) UPSET WITH YOU. LARS D I E D.

GUITAR DAD SAVES THE DAY

i love Greg Universe

how would you not notice if you aren’t getting any service on your phone? your phone tells you when you’re getting service or not

bruh you almost made your dad drive off a cliff for you to get phone service

Greg Universe is a ride or die kinda guy

this ending shot is cute, i’ll give you that.

episode rating: 2 party guys out of 5. Party Guy should’ve bitten Steven’s phone and his shit attitude. also PEARL WTF ARE YOU TELL US ALREADY

BACK TO THE KINDERGARTEN

Connie i miss you

“of the three things i have to do in the sink now, this is the one i least mind you seeing” B R U H

Peridot listens to country music, this is disgusting

HOLY SHIT AMETHYST IS TOSSIN’ PERIDOT AROUND LIKE SHE WEIGHS NOTHING AND I’M CRACKING UP

“can i bring my music?” “NO.” damn Amethyst you already threw Peri around like she ain’t nothin’, let her bring her music if it’ll help her

aaaay, they’re in the train again!

dang, Peri really loved the barn.

i kinda like that Amethyst is going around trying to figure out which member of the Famethyst came out of which part of the Kindergarten. kinda cute.

so everything is seriously determined by the nutrition, right down to the style of a Gem’s hair? ...huh. iron deposits determine hair styles.

damn, Peri went with a sucker punch to the gut with her little speech about how Kindergartens kill off life and are just “lifeless husks” once all the Gems are done being formed. and Amethyst feels awful about it, dang.

ok. there’s a flower growin’ in the Kindergarten, and that should technically be impossible due to all of the nutrients in this one area being used up. this could be interesting.

ok, so now the trio is gonna farm & see what happens. ok, ok, i can roll with this i guess.

FARMING MONTAGE

look at them flowers

they proud

don’t make Peri live here

why the flamingo thingy taller than both of them

gods i didn’t need to see Steven happily showering

they’re talking about how the flowers are probs gonna look beautiful i bet they all died, they’re too positive about this. $5 them flowers are dead.

them flowers are dead,

...now they’re arguing, cause Peri blew up on them. alright. this ain’t good.

aaaaaaaaaaaand Peri crushed the original flower that grew here. both Steven & Amethyst made pained whimpers. ok. this ain’t good.

oh it’s a Gem creature- haven’t seen one of those in a while!

IT ATE PERIDOT HOLY FUCK

SMOKEY QUARTZ IS BACK

ngl i like Smokey’s theme music

btw there’s no dialogue from Smokey, just a quick 2 second thing

Peri doesn’t reform with a star on her

ok, that was kinda cute. and having a technician that also likes gardening is cute too

episode rating: 3.5 dead sunflowers outta 5. it was an okay episode & i did like it.

SADIE KILLER

heh, i get it. cause lady killer.

oh god, that looks bad

WHY IS THAT MOP SO BIG

instead of reading off a long-ass list to the overly worked employee, just hand Sadie the list so she won’t fuck up?

“and a coffee. hold the coffee.” same tbh

oh. he’s in a band with the Cool Kids. WE GET TO SEE THE COOL KIDS!

“...i hope he [Lars] is safe and all, but working all these shifts by myself has been a huge drag” GIRL, LARS DIED IN SPACE AND IS STILL THERE

Steven stealing all the napkins is something i’d do tbh

man, i love the Cool Kids

is my girl Jenny rockin’ the bass? aaaaaaaaaaay!

Sour Cream, what the HECK IS RAP-A-BILLY?

“Doo-doo. Butt. The government corrupts” Buck is the voice of this generation

welcome to EB Games

they... they admitted to following her home from work....

“doo-doo. i think i broke your bed” Buck wtf

also, i guess them watching all of Sadie’s horror movies gave them inspiration to do that weird donut-brain-eating song. weird.

“we are the working dead, and we lurch for minimum wage” same Sadie

......ok, she’s freaking everyone out. and they look uncomfortable. Sadie, seriously stop. they’re concerned.

...she. put lipstick on her eyes.

see, if she wasn’t freakin’ everyone out with this, i’d say this song is a bop.

ok they’re fine now & thought it was lit ok cool cool cool. i ain’t a big fan of the lyrics tbh, but i do like the song.

“aww, doo-doo”

ok so Steven’s askin’ for advice on how to write horror-themed songs from Sadie. how about LARS DIED ON HOMEWORLD

SADIE’S ADVICE IS:

LOSE YOUR LIFE TO A BORING JOB

LOSE THE ONE PERSON YOU WERE CLOSE TO

LOSE YOUR MIND WORKIN A TON OF SHIFTS

GIRL FOR THE LOVE OF GOD

Steven puttin’ Sadie on blast, good lord he just sang an accidental roast tryin’ to sing shit like she does

HE STOLE ALL THE NAPKINS AGAIN

“you can’t help being cute no more than i can help being cool” Buck, you’re a blessing

“yoooooo, what if this is all a dream?” Buck, wtf?

oh. Sadie’s goin’ with them. okay.

OH. SHE QUIT HER JOB. UM. OKAY?

episode rating: 3 funky riffs out of 5. Buck Dewey is great.

KEVIN PARTY

I DO NOT WANT TO WATCH THIS EPISODE, BUT IMMA DO IT ANYWAY

DIDN’T EVEN START THE EPISODE AND I STILL FEEL UNCOMFORTABLE

let’s just get this over with...

why’d Steven wait this long to track down Lion?!

siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh, here he is......

gods, i still hate him

stop being gross to kids, leave Steven and Connie alone ya freak

at least he knows they use they/them pronouns.

how did he find out where Connie is? doesn’t she live far away from Beach City? did he track down these two kids just to “invite” Stevonnie?!

“no one turns down an invitation to a Kevin party” i sure as fuck would

lmao Kevin has an old phone

“your name’s Steven? weird, i thought your name was Clarence” OI, DON’T INSULT CLARENCE LIKE THAT

rude, Steven brought snacks and ya just toss ‘em into the void?

ok. he’s creepily obsessed with Stevonnie cause apparently they make parties and shit like that hella fun. um. stop? being obsessed with kids??

WTF WHY IS LION AT THE PARTY

Connie actually showed up. and had Lion the entire time. that’s. super fucked up. Lion is the ONLY way to get to Lars directly!

and also, there’s TWO KIDS AT A PARTY WITH OLDER PEOPLE?! NO ONE BUT DERRICK QUESTIONS THIS?

Kevin’s gonna try to get them to talk to each other... so they can form Stevonnie... so his party won’t suck...

also, he keeps calling them 7-year-olds........ siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh, ok Kevin.

KEVIN YOU IDIOT LET THEM TALK TO EACH OTHER SO HE CAN SAY SORRY DON’T GIVE HIM YOUR “COOL GUY” BULLSHIT

“i need those old people to whisper my name when they die” tbh goals

“who’s Sabina?” Kevin got all red in the face and almost lost his cool

so Kevin’s gonna try to make Steven look like he’s moved on from Connie or some shit. this won’t end well.

NO, NOT DERRICK’S JACKET

now we get a montage of 2 kids being uncomfortable surrounded by older people at a party they should’t be at, ok.

at least Connie looks cute. and she got a haircut! so cute!

NOT CUTE NOT CUTE NOT CUTE

GOD, I HATE KEVIN

Steven, what are you doing?

STEVEN, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

ok, quick recap cause i didn’t mention this: Kevin thought Steven & Connie were dating, so, Connie only went to the party to see if Steven’s okay and if they could talk. Steven decided to follow Kevin’s advice for some reason, and Connie thinks Steve’s new BFF is Kevin, and Kevin has no concept of what friends are.

so. Connie didn’t text Steven cause she preferred talking face to face about this, and that texting him wasn’t good enough to work out these issues. very fair point. still don’t get why you legit stole Lion from him, but the not texting back thing makes complete sense.

ok, she rode Lion to his house while Steven, Greg & the Gems were away (the episode Gemcation). and that’s when she bumped into Kevin and got the invite. ok. now Kevin is slightly less creepy, but still disgusting nonetheless.

oh, yay! they’re talking it out! and Steven isn’t disregarding Connie’s anger!

yay! they’re friends again!

don’t form Stevonnie, don’t form Stevonnie, don’t form Stevonnie, don’t form Stevonnie, don’t form Stevonnie, don’t form Stevonnie, don’t form Stevonnie, don’t form Stevonnie, don’t form Stevonnie, don’t form Stevonnie, don’t form Stevonnie, don’t form Stevonnie, don’t form Stevonnie.

LMAO GET FUCKED, KEVIN, THEY AIN’T FORMIN’ STEVONNIE

episode rating: 1 Lion out of 5. least fave episode, tbh. but hey, we got Connie back!

#su spoilers #su leaks #su criticism #su critical #spilled latte

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survivor-tierradelfuego · 4 years ago

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Ep. 10: “Not all hero’s wear capes, some wear pajama pants and robes!” - Cody

Amy A

Everything worked out PERFECTLY. Ugh I love a good plan. Hopefully my new core 4 plus Najwah stays in power.

Olivia A

WHAT THE HELL!! Grae was my closest ally this is so disappointing. On top of everything, Aimee didn’t even vote with us!! So we’re at a 6-4 disadvantage. I don’t think anyone wants to work with us. Our last hope is finding and buying the idols and utilizing Kalle’s fake idol. I hate this.

Pedro A

woke up on the bottom...and thinking i was going home...guess what...im still here ahahahhahahahahahahhhaahhah...yall though...kalle is my guardian angel ...like if it wasnt for that girlll i would be out

ben kessler

Wednesday, July 29th, immediately after the tribal grae got voted out: heheheheheheheheheheheheheheheheh

Aimee

I had a long day and now Grae is gone. I’m honestly crying. Jay asked if I was okay and the river of tears just started flowing. I only knew Grae for a short while and really wanted to get to know them more. They brought such a beautiful, fun and loving energy to this game. Grae, I really am going to miss you. I’m just gonna go hug a stuff animal.

Maddison

I knew Pedro was going to play an idol. He didn’t do one single puzzle, it’s obvious he felt safe. Snakes are slithering.

Kalle N.

I truly cannot believe that our plan worked but it did and my splitting headache is totally worth it. I really feel like I deserve an Emmy or an Oscar for my performance with Maddison and Olivia after tribal but it's fine. I have absolutely no idea what comes next but boi will it be messy. I'm so sorry it had to be Grae but I didn't know what else to do. Also I hate that I'm working with Ben but don't worry I will use my chaotic energy to go against him eventually. I will now be erasing myself from the narrative and taking a break for several hours. Thank you for coming to my TED Talk.

Najwah

OK last night's tribal was wiiiiiiild af. I think the funniest part is that this all started with me planting a seed. I told Amy L that she is at the bottom of their alliance and that I was open to working with her to get Maddison out. She spilled all the tea about Maddison having two idols and that she's been wanting to gether out for a while bc she says the same thing to everyone lmao. I think the thing that pissed Amy off is that she told her "I feel closest to you" anyway, Amy didn't respond to me immediately so I thought she wasn't on board at first so I told Cody I'd work with him and that I have the idol from Alan. Ffs. Wrong move. Cody just trust other people wit information and it's really annoying. While I love Sarah, I can't really trust her bc she's really close to Ben and Aimee - who I do not trust. Well, Aimee I am not sure about. I guess I only don't trust her because of her close Ness to Ben and Ben blatantly lies. Anyway. So Amy told me that their alliance is still trying to vote Pedro which is perfect for us coz we can still stay Hanúha strong. So at this point I realise I wouldn't have to play my super idol and Cody wouldn't have to play his extra vote. Anyway. Amy tells Kalle about the plan to get Maddison out. I send Amy a long ass message Pedro sent Zack that Zack sent me. She tells her group that Zack had sent it to her, to solidify their vote for Pedro. And then She, Kalle, Ben and Pedro form an alliance and they pull off one of the most epic blindsided. I mean, wow. Amy told me beforehand so I saw it coming and I told Cody about it too. Lmao but Ccody just can't be low key he wrote something about Maddison's two idols and he asked in the Old Hanúha group whether anyone had known about the plan lmao obviously Ben was like "no" and wtf. Ben's facial expressions at tribal was hilarious especially because I know he careful conducted this whole genius plan. I mean people still think their alliances are with their alliances and that no one has moles but there are so many layers right now and there are a few moles.

Cody just needs to shut up. Be like Ben who claims that everything he is doing is for James lmao but is in a secret alliance with the person that got James out lmao love it. I love that I can see through some of the BS right now. The only person that could fuck up my game is Cody atm but I am taking a leap of faith and trusting him. He needs to trust me too. I kept telling him to just trust the process last night and he kept freaking out. I think the realisation of Ben being a BSer got to him a bit. Also, he toldd Sarah that I spoke to Amy? Like I'm so fkn mad. Can he just shut up? Ugh that's my biggest problem right now. I LOVE CODY OMG WE SPEAK ON VIDEO CALL LIKE EVERY HOUR LMAO but I'm just scared that he is too trusting with certain people, especially at this point in the game. He also doesn't know how to be low key lmao which is kinda funny. Also, Pedro. Wev ebeen talking a lot. Pedro's friggin Greek they're speech and the vote with Grae that ended with "sorry not sorry" just. Lmao. I wish I watched this on TV. I'm sad that it happened via skype😂😂 also I am not sure how this VL confession thing works. Did I say the right things? Yall probably have all the tea already. I'm a little sad that Grae went home. She seemed genuinely nice but she was our only option because Olivia won immunity. Maddison also made us all uncomfortable coz she took the time to chat to none of the new people at merge. Like? Olivia and Grae made the effort. She just seems too safe. Too comfortable. She isn't even participating in this challenge. Is she THAT comfortable or just pissed? Who knows? Never keep to yourself like that. It makes people suspicious. Pedro does seem very smart and manipulative though and I will be weary of him. Let's go idol hunting then woohoo.

Najwah

Also I keep laughing at how ridiculously bad I am at answering questions at tribal. Omg. Embarrassing. I need like a few minutes to THINK. I always look back, and wonder why tf I said what I said. In retrospect, I'd answer last night's question with "don't we all feel like we are on the outs?" ugh. I'm so bad at it. I realise it makes me look dumb and perhaps that's not a bad thing. I don't mind looking dumb tbh. Lmao.

Cody A.

I haven’t done one of these written confessions in a while! Obviously things have been absolutely fish crazy. Idek what fish crazy means but it just came to me. And on the topic of fish... I’m pretty positive I called Maola a bunch of sharks at tribal council.

If it wasn’t for Naj last night, I would have been completely blonde sided by the vote. I had no idea what was going on, I thought the plan was to put votes on Pedro and Madison and one of them would go.

About 20 minutes before tribal naj called me and said she did not want me to feel left out of the events that were about to occur. She told me the real plan of Pedro and Madison both playing idols and Pedro casting the sole vote on Grae. Not going to lie I was scared shitless... I was so close to writing kalles name as a safety net for myself. What if Pedro would’ve cast the sole vote against me? At the very least it would’ve been a 1-1 tie between myself and kalle. I just didn’t want to be Denise’d out of this game.

Ultimately I trusted my gut which told me to just trust naj. If I had got fucked over last night, at least I would’ve went out trusting the right people. Naj also told me about a 4 person alliance between Amy, Pedro, Kalle, and BEN... My Ben!!! Smh. So moving forward I have to be very careful with the information I give and receive from Ben which sucks because I thought I could trust him more :/ Basically THANK THE LORDT FOR NAJ. Not all hero’s wear capes, some wear pajama pants and robes!

Kalle N.

So this entire time that I've worked with Ben, he always dictates our moves and every single thing I can or can't say to certain people. If I suggest something he immediately turns it down and will only do what he wants. Men are the worst. Anyways, a little bit ago after he told me what our next move is and didn't let me have any input, he suddenly said "Actually what do you want to do? You go ahead and tell me what you want". That is EXTREMELY sus and makes me think that he's just trying to make me feel better while he's secretly plotting against me. I could go along with it and just let him vote me out bc honestly I'm exhausted, or I could reveal all of the insanity that happened in the last vote to my other alliance and then expose him to his own tribe for working with me. Which would get him voted out. But that's a lot of work so I'm ngl I'm leaning towards just getting voted out myself

Aimee

I’m so glad I’m not actually on an island playing real life Survivor right now. I would constantly be in the ocean or somewhere in the bushes bawling my eyes out. And then coming back to camp like, “oh hey guys! No puffy face here, I promise! Yeah everything is peaches! Hanuha strong! Those red eyes are just from too much sun, I think I need to lay down in the shade” I’m not crying over Grae and how shitty I was to Maddison or anything, JayKay I totally am! I hate that I didn’t tell Maddison the votes were going her way. I’m not even sure why I didn’t. I’m so sorry Maddison, I really hope we can rebuild our connection and work together again. I just feel like barf and am exhausted. Trying to play this game with a full time job is tough. I hope I have the emotional fortitude to pick myself back up and put on a poker face. The last thing I need is anyone figuring out my tells and knowing what I am up to. I want to work with Ben and Maddison the most at this point. I hope I can make that work out.

Pedro A

I'm honestly scared...for the next tribal ...I feel like everyone is gonna go after me...cause apparently I'm the villan lol

Kalle N.

It's a little hard to focus on the game at the current moment bc an exciting/terrifying development may be occurring in my life in the next couple of days. I'm having a prolonged anxiety attack. We were going to try to take out Aimee so F's in the chat to pay respect. Don't know what I'll be doing. Need to go cry in the shower now.

Najwah

Sigh. It's been a very long day. I really played hard at this challenge, knowing I have a 15% DA. Do I think it's insane that someone came into the game when half the players had already been eliminated and over half the 24 hours had already passed only to NOT even try to eliminate the one person not in our alliance in there, then pretend it's all kumbaya and eliminate our alliance (who we said we won't eliminate, we made a pact?) one by one? I mean yeah it's damn insane. And not that I'm a sore loser or anything, but I wish she'd have been there when things were actually heated and when everyone else was putting in the hard work. This isn't endurance in my opinion. This is coming into a game late and reaping all the benefits. However, well done on her tactic. Love it honestly. I think she made good moves and knew when to strike and for that, of course I think she's a fkn Queen. Even though I felt as though I was so close to winning immunity, even though I tried really hard. At the end of the day, it's how you outwit and outlast your opponents. Next time I'll be sure to not read challenge rules at 4am and then try to actually understand the game properly and how I too, can make things easier for myself dammit coz I think i keep making everything so hard for myself in this game ugh. I just need one fucking WIN. Goodness I am playing so hard. Wow. Wow. Starting to wonder what panderosa is like lol must be fun. Anyway I need to sleep coz the sleep deprivation is making me feel sick af and making me paranoid about having corona.

Aimee

https://lovelyygifss.tumblr.com/post/618070044309700608/deserved-more-than-0-votesssss QUEEN SARAH!!!!!!! 👑 ♥️ This challenge proved to me so much that Sarah is in it for the long haul with me! I could tell she was never guessing for my word and I wasn’t trying hers. Team Casanova is once again coming up equal on all challenges and I love to see it! I can’t believe I got to have my Michele moment and come from behind after being hours behind in the challenge and eliminating the last three people in a row to kick down that damn puzzle! I am on such an adrenaline rush!!! After the low lows of last night this rollercoaster of game really proves you can get right back up and thrive! Haha it was so hard saying my word since I’m a pretty positive person and my word was “not.” Sarah and I never gave up in this challenge and we ended up being the last two remaining!!! I also really bonded with Najwah and Cody. That challenge was so much more than immunity it was also a great opportunity to bond with cast mates and I really capitalized on that. Even during this challenge I patched things up with Maddison too and it seems like we are back to trying to make things work with us. I feel like Grae would want that for both of us too. I went from crying my eyes out the night before to total redemption today. It was on my bucketlist to win an individual immunity and I did it on something I never knew I could win. I’m just so amped and trying to calm myself down. I’m just https://youtu.be/erG5rgNYSd Wheeler island in the sun The song I was listening to when I won immunity. 🎃🐻🌈🍑❤️💜🧡💛

Sarah

There have been so many things that have happened today... This morning Ben, Naj, and I gave Cody enough coins for him to hopefully get the idol. Cody showed me what was in the store and how there were two necklaces for $20 which was odd. He got one of the necklaces and we thought it was a real idol. Tbh we still don’t know if it’s a real idol. Cody sent a fake message to Ben and I showing that it was a “fake idol” (he got the message from Naj when she had found a fake idol). We thought it was real but when Cody found it it said “what seems to be an idol,” which makes me think someone planted a fake idol there and he did get a fake idol. I will send in more soon...

Najwah

I thought that making it to merge would be enough for me lol but somehow my goal is just to get further now. I'm at a crossroads though bc there is no one I really want to get out or back stab or whatever. Cody found a supposed idol yesterday. I told him just to tell Ben it's a fake idol and if Ben wanted to use the fake idol, he could give him my idol. Thing is, Cody is paranoid about it being a real idol or fake one that he found. I think he should just chill about it and it'll be fine. I just want Cody to be calm, I feel like without Zack's constant talking and scheming, the silence is getting to him a bit. But I quite like the silence. He thinks it means something is happening or people are plotting against him. I just think it means people are trying to sleep lol. I mean even if he was a target, he still has an idol. Ugh. Anyway it's actually a religious holiday for me today and tomorrow. So I will spend time with my husband and perhaps go to a fancy restaurant or something. I haven't felt fancy in so long and I realised everyone in this game has really seen gross, messy haired, late night Najwah lmao like I usually don't even let my friends see me this way

Najwah

It's silly trying to keep wondering who tf I can trust. I need to just go with my gut. There are a few people in the game I really like. Cody, Sarah, Amy, Pedro and Aimee. I don't know the rest and I don't trust Ben. I don't know what he's up to. He was supposed to be in some secret alliance with Kalle and Amy but he told Cody and I about them so what's really happening? Who knows? Also he keeps asking me what do I want to do who do I want out? Lmaoooooooooo.

Najwah

We had a lot of deep, crazy conversations yesterday and one of my favs were actually drooling over survivor players and realising how gay everyone is lmao. I love that. As someone who has struggled with my sexuality for most of my life, thinking I'm gay for a long time and then finding myself attracted to boys too was bizarre in the early 2000s. and being told being bisexual is a "phase" or "confusion" or that it was bc I went to an all girls school (shout out to Rhenish girls High), being in a space where everyone is really open and accepting of all this is amazing. I'm happy i live in a country where gay marriages have been legal since 2006 and ironically being trans or gay is not that big of a deal here as it is in countries way more progressive than ours. I still struggle with non binary pronouns but I am learning thanks to this game. I feel free just being who I am, whoever tf that is in this game. And for that I'm obviously very thankful. Today, I'm married to a man who appreciates my sexuality and is open to me exploring it even more. Its been a long journey and it makes me extremely happy seeing people in this game, so much younger than me and so much more sure of themselves. I'm happy that they will be spared a lot of pain and confusion. I love GenZ. I love that they just are who they are and there is no pretense. This Is so important and a luxury previous generations could only dream. Of.

Sarah

From two nights ago.... https://youtu.be/uebz8rVKNbg https://youtu.be/xQyiuiGeEpo

Olivia A

Our plan for this vote feels really ambitious but I think it’s gonna work. We’ll likely get the numbers back :)

Maddison

I’m going to have to use my advantage tonight to save my ass. Guess that’s what advantages are for, eh?

Ben Kessler

I am trying to vote kalle out. If it works, my name will be out there but it may pay off. Maddison and Olivia are definitely going for me which is fine. I need to tell Pedro 5 minutes before tribal to trust me.

Kalle N.

Maddison will use her advantage, Olivia will play my idol, the only votes that will count will be the votes we put on Cody. That's it that's the plan

Cody A.

https://youtu.be/PuZChTTJzzU

Pedro A

Okay so me olivia kalle and amy are voting cody...plus maddison will leave tribal......and olivia will play the idol kalle has....i swear if olivia votes for me...and i go HOMEEE....IM DONEE...i have a bad feeling about this tribal...im trusting the devil lol

Olivia A

Kalle has been playing double agent this whole time and told everyone about the safety without power advantage grrr what a mess

Maddison

I’m making a big move tonight and I’m not sure yet how it will pan out.

Olivia A

Kalle has been playing double agent this whole time and told everyone about the safety without power advantage grrr what a mess

Olivia A

Initially we were going to all (Maddison, Cody, Najwah, Sarah, Aimee, and I) vote Ben but we are going to switch it to Kalle because Aimee and Ben are kinda close and we want to keep Aimee as a number. I’m happy to see Kalle go after how much she has lied to Maddison and me.

Olivia A

I am SO nervous for this vote. Here is the whole plan: Maddison will play her safety without power advantage and I will play the (fake) idol that Kalle gave me. This is just so that Kalle doesn’t get tipped off that we know about her lies. Kalle believes Maddison, Amy, and I are voting for Cody and think that she is voting for him as well. In reality, Cody, Aimee, Sarah, Najwah, Amy, and I are voting for Ben. We suspect Ben, Kalle, and maybe Pedro are voting for me and expect it to work because of the fake idol that Kalle planted. I really hope this works because if people are lying then I’m definitely going home.

Ben Kessler

Dearest confessional, My life is out on the line. I am in a very vulnerable position right now and if I stay in the game tonight damage control must be done. There are many complicated plans and I work best under chaos, so these votes are hopefully good for my game overall. If kalle actually gives her idol to Olivia and we vote out kalle, maddison and Olivia and Amy will be pissed, but they do not have the numbers. I would need to do some more work to make sure I get the info that kalle is currently giving me, but it's not as bad as going farther with kalle and then losing later on. I now need to video call kalle goodbye.

#episodes

0 notes

stylo-xx · 7 years ago

Text

Eyes Closed (M)

G-Dragon: Angst/Small amount of fluff/Eventual smut

PART 2-A: The One About The Night Before

A/N: Crap sorry it’s so late you guys, I was trying to edit as fast as I could I swear! But if there are typos my bad lmao Anyway I feel like this one is a bit short but I hope you enjoy nonetheless!

P.S. Part 2-B should be out some time tomorrow.

(Part One)||(Part Two-B)

I woke up with a jolt and a cold sweat, feeling like the entire room was still spinning; physically feeling like I got hit by an eighteen wheeler. I brushed some of the mess of hair from my face and through half lidded eyes I tried to look around the room to make sure I didn't end up in some stranger’s place; thankfully for my dignity I wasn’t but unfortunately for my ego, I wasn’t.

“Ugh what time is it?” I groaned reaching for my phone on the nightstand. Fumbling around the nightstand the only thing my hand was met with was the touch activated lamp that blinded me with a bombardment of light. “Argh no!” I threw my arm across my face. I frantically hurried to shut off the lamp that felt like it was emitting the rays from the sun. Only managing to open one eye I looked around for my phone and discovered it was strewn on the floor with a mess of clothes and shoes. I groaned again not wanting to leave the comfort of the bed, I outstretched my hand nearly falling off the bed and quickly nabbed my phone and hauling myself back into my previous position under the covers. Pressing the home button to my phone I again was greeted with a flash bomb of light and covered my face with my hand; slapping myself in the process. Still adjusting to the light I peeked through my fingers desperately looking to find the time. ‘2:00 p.m. fuck’ With my phone unlocked I went wide eyed, ‘Shit, shit, shiiiit’ I thought; I had 17 missed calls and 10 voicemails from Saige. Looking for some kind of answer I scrolled through her text messages that only seemed to get more and more aggressive the further I scrolled along.

‘Alex where the hell did you go?’ <received 1:44 am>

‘Itsf o k im with djsaho’ <sent 1:52 am>

‘Ok bitch you are waaaaaaay too fucked up, where are you?’ <received 1:52 am>

‘Urd th e bitc yo bcht’ <sent 1:55 am>

‘I’m being serious Alex, if the paparazzi or some douche bag from the internet get a picture of you like this we are royally screwed’ <received 1:55 am>

‘Dnt wrry Gbe okie’ <sent 1:56 am>

‘Dont do this to me McMahon, WHERE ARE YOU????’ <received 1:56 am>

‘Byiii cee yu ntx wek’ <sent 1:57 am>

‘Wtf do you mean see you next week???’ <received 1:57 am>

‘Alex?’ <received 1:59 am>

‘HELLO?!’ <received 2:01 am>

‘ANSWER YOUR PHONE I KNOW YOU KEEP DECLINING THE CALL’ <received 2:05 am>

‘I swear to God when I see you I am going to kick your ass’ <received 2:06 am>

‘AND WHO TF IS DJ SAHO?! YOU SAID YOU WERE DONE WITH DATING DJS’ <received 2:06 am>

‘Oh my God Alexandra PLEASE JUST ANSWER YOUR PHONE IF YOU DON'T WANT TO TELL ME WHERE YOU ARE’ <received 2:10 am>

‘Ok somebody told me you went home with someone, for your sake I hope it was Jesus and not that DJ Saho or whatever’ <received 2:15 am>

‘Open the door! You know I can hear you and DJ what's his face laughing!’ <received 2:30 am>

‘I don't care that we are staying at the Palace Hotel Alexandra. I WILL break down this door if you don’t open up!’ <received 2:32 am>

‘OPEN THE DOOR’ <received 2:33 am>

‘No oo itd coolr ift yo u berki t don’ <sent 2:33 am>

‘I SWEAR TO GOD’ <received 2:34 am>

‘Fine see if I care when you end up on the cover of some Korean tabloid and Ji-Yong finds out you're here’ <received 2:36>

‘wh att’ <sent 2:36>

‘Good night Alex :)))’ <received 2:37>

Re-reading the last exchanges between us my heart felt like it started beating so fast that it was bound to burst right out of my chest any second. ‘Fuck. Fuck, fuck, fuuuuuuuuuuck. How could I have been so stupid?!’ I thought to myself. Normally I’d say I don't care but that is far from where I am mentally. Suddenly I was brought out of my thoughts by a loud knocking on my door. Still paranoid with the thought of J-him seeing me I climbed out of bed and approached the door carefully. The closer I got to the door the more anxious I became; that mixed with the killer hangover that hit me like a ton of bricks was quite possibly the worst combination of things that could happen at a time like this. The knocking started to feel like the noise was pounding against my skull, wanting to rid myself of this monstrous beating on my brain I opened the door without hesitation. Only to be met with the last person I would ever think would show up at my door.

“Alex?” he raised an eyebrow.

“Tim?” I reciprocated.

“Jesus H--no offence but Saige wasn’t kidding when she said you might look like you crawled out of Hell this morning”

I clenched my jaw “Just come in before anyone else has to endure my ugly” I slammed the door shut behind him causing myself to wince at what sounded like an explosion went off in my brain.

Trailing behind him I watched him maneuver his way over the mess that was all over the floor; just clothes and shoes in different piles scattered in every square inch of the room.

“Jeez, you didn’t want to clean up first?” he said finally making it to the bed.

Too exhausted to argue I rolled my eyes and plopped back on the bed beside him.

“Man, guess you had a good night last night?” he smiled leaning back on his elbows.

“Ugh, if this is what this hangover from Hell is indicating...I wish I hadn’t” I covered my eyes with my arm “When did you get in by the way? I thought you were going to be in Japan until tomorrow? And not that I don’t love you but why are you here in the first place?”

He chuckled “To answer your questions: I got in about three hours ago, I had a change of plans aaand Saige sent me on a recon mission”

“Why?”

“She said and I quote ‘Dear God Tim would deal with her because I can’t take her after last night’ end quote” He chuckled again “Also seeing as two of my best friends just got here the night before and one of them was already causing trouble I decided that spending time with that girl in Japan was not really worth it…”

I uncovered my eyes with a gasp “Oh my God, you are such a jerk--”

“Relax” he put up his hand “whatever we had between us wasn’t really going anywhere anyway. I think she really just wanted to be with me so she could say she was with me. Seeing as who I hang out with nowadays, it's getting harder and harder to figure out who wants to hang out with me for me and not for ‘Tim Drake, the DJ who so happens to be signed to Seungri’s music label so that must mean he is friends with BigBang’. I mean they’re not wrong, I am friends with them but still it the principle of the thing” he rolled his eyes.

Merely looking at his face I could tell he was genuinely hurt, he was one of the nicest and most sincere people I have ever met and just knowing that my selfish wish somewhat came true made my heart hurt.

“I mean I guess that’s what you get for being such a hot shot DJ with an attractive everything to match” I said trying to make light of the situation.

“Shut up” he laughed “By the way, are you just gonna chill in your underwear the entire time or are you gonna put on a robe?”

I looked down at my bra “Tim it’s not like it's the first time you've seen me in my underwear. I think we are past that point in our friendship”

“I mean I don’t have a problem, I just don’t want you to think I’m being a perv” he said sincerely.

“I would never” I jokingly gasped and placed a hand on his shoulder “Anyway, tell me about your new life here: How do you like it? How’s it been? Besides that girl, how is your love life here? You know all that good stuff” I rolled over on my side to face him.

“Its been..good?”

“That doesn’t sound too convincing Timmoth” I squinted my eyes at him.

He let out a small laugh “No I’m serious! Everything's been great so far, minus the whole ‘love life’ thing” he air quoted.

“So does that mean you and Chaerin still haven’t talked?” I rested my head on my arm.

“Yes, that means I still haven’t talked to Chaerin. Honestly I don’t think that’ll ever happen. I mean I invited her to my party so the only thing I can do now is wait and see if she decides to show up. But I’m not going to be completely heartbroken if she doesn't, at this point I’m used to getting the short end of the stick with her” he sighed.

“She’ll show I’m sure of it, if there is one thing that sticks with you after breaking up with your boyfriend no matter how long ago it was you always remember those tiny details about them. She, I’m sure, is no different”

“Don’t even get my hopes up” he playfully pushed my shoulder “Alright enough about my lackluster love life, what about you huh? I’ve only heard about your rendezvous through what people tag me in on twitter”

I rolled on to my back again staring up at the ceiling “Ugh. I’ll just say it’s slim pickins in LA. I seriously feel like I’ve about dated everyone in Hollywood at this point. I’m just so bored with everyone there, Saige suggested we move to Manhattan for a while to get a change of scenery and...men”

He let out another small laugh “Orrr”

“Or what?” I turned my head to face him.

“Or you could come move here and not only would have a complete change of scenery but you’d get to be with me and also an entire new buffet of men to choose from” he wiggled his eyebrows “Ya know” he cleared his throat “I happen to know one or two, single, billionaire musical geniuses that--”

“Ha-ha very funny” I interjected “don’t even go there Tim”

“Oh come on Alex!” he put a hand on my shoulder “You’re gonna see him this weekend anyway, why prolong the inevitable?!”

I brushed his hand off my shoulder.

“Okay, okay I take it you’re still mad at me about me not telling you that he was coming until you were on your flight over here, but what was I supposed to do? If i had told you earlier you would have either A) not come at all or B) run out of the airport and go AWOL again!” he scrunched up his eyebrows.

I took and deep breath and looked away from him.

“And I couldn’t just not invite him when all of the other guys were going to be there, that would have looked super shady on my part. Besides I know you two have your issues, that you still refuse to tell anyone why you guys broke up about in the first place, but he’s also a homie”

I turned back to glare at him “Okay well then why don’t you marry him then if he such a good homie?”

“Very mature” he stuck out his tongue “look you and I both know I love you more than anyone in the entire universe, but you also gotta understand he and I are still cool. He’s also one of the biggest musical influences here and I’d really rather not get on his shit list”

“Are you just doing this because you want me to talk to him?” I raised an eyebrow “What about girl code? If I hate someone you hate them right back, you don’t just hang out with them like it’s nothing and twiddle your thumbs up each other's asses!”

“First off, ouch how dare you say I broke girl code ” he pretended to act hurt “And secondly, I didn’t just do this because I wanted you two to talk...well actually that’s partially it...but that’s not the point! What matters is that we all enjoy ourselves this weekend and celebrate not only my day of birth but also my first album finally dropping; all while making sure it is completely drama free for everyone involved” he smiled.

I crossed my arms and let out a big sigh.

“Besides, I think after last night you don’t need anymore drama to be broadcasted out for the world to see”

I sat up quickly “W-what do you mean?”

“Oh, you haven’t seen?” he sat up with a concerned look on his face “Well ummm...here let me show you”

‘Oh God, Saige was right why didn’t my drunk ass just listen to her?!’ I thought to myself. ‘Oh man she really is gonna kick my ass when she sees me…’

Tim, taking out his phone pulled up some news article that held embarrassing pictures of my drunk self with some guy. Thankfully most all of them were grainy and the pictures were kind of dark, all except for one.

“What.the.f--” I let out a blood curdling scream.

“Hyung, don’t get me wrong I just don’t think this is a good idea” Seungri tried for the thousandth time to pull Young-Bae back by his arm. “I already told you, we at least have to make sure he’s alive” Young-Bae said undeterred by the maknae’s actions “What are you so afraid of?” “And I already told you, if Ji-Yong Hyung is even possible of being conscious he is going to be pissed that we woke him up just to see if he’s still living and have us maimed!” the younger man pulled on his Hyung’s shoulder.

The older man simply smiled “Not me”

“Oh must be nice being the golden star best friend! In case you haven’t noticed, Ji-Yong Hyung loves to show me gestures of his affection by inflicting nothing but pain on me and therefore gaining some kind of sick pleasure from hurting me!”

The older man stopped in his tracks causing the maknae to slightly bump into him “Seungri we’ve all been friends for longer than ten years, don’t you think if he actually wanted you dead he would have done it by now?” he smiled and continued walking.

Seungri stuck in the spot that he stood thought before he spoke “You know that’s not actually very reassuring!” he called after his Hyung.

Young-Bae now at the end of the hallway shot Seungri another smile but this one evoking an eye smile along with it. The maknae picked up his pace and swifty jogged to the older man’s position. Both now staring down the door to Ji-Yong’s condo they both were thinking about the repercussions of actually waking the dragon. Young-Bae not wanting to take the first blow pushed the younger man in front of him.

“Well go ahead, knock on the door” he gestured with his hand.

Seungri dramatically pointed to himself “Me? You want me to knock on the door?”

The older man nodded.

“Hyung were you not listening to anything I was saying back there?” he stared at Young-bae incredulously “Wow. you all must really want me out of BigBang, well it was nice knowing you”

“Yah” the older man smacked him behind the head “Don’t be so melodramatic and knock on the door would you? And besides we can't afford to lose you. You're too important”

The younger man rubbed the back of his head “Wah. do you mean that Hyung?”

“Yea if we lose you then who else are we going to pick on? Dae-Sung? Not on your life” he said with a smug smile on his face.

The maknae looked to the heavens and closed his eyes, cursing at his Hyungs in his head; the only place he was safe to do so.

“Yah!” another smack to the back of the head “Quit being a dick in your thoughts and knock on the damn door!”

Seungri went wide eyed; guess he wasn’t so safe in his own mind after all. He shakily raised his fist in the air toward the ever menacing black door. What laid beyond that threshold could either be a nice Ji-Yong welcoming them into his home or the actual Ji-Yong who was going to rip Seungri a new one for waking him. The maknae took a deep breath before he gave three small knocks.

“Hyung?” he whispered.

Young-Bae side eyed him “What human being in your right mind is going to be able to hear that?” The older man grabbed a hold of the maknae’s fist and raised it to pound on the door.

“No, Hyung wait!”

With not even a full knock, the door swung wide open. As if it were some cartoon, the two stuck both their heads over the threshold and looked inside.

“Hello?” they said in unison.

The two stood up straight and began to walk over the threshold at the same time only to get halted by squashing into each other. The older man glared at the maknae and shoved his shoulder to get by. Seungri merely rubbed his shoulder and closed the door behind him. Looking around the living room gave no impression of anyone actually living there, everything was perfectly in its place making it look like it was some kind of eerie museum. “Ji-Yong-ah?” Young-Bae called out peeking into every doorway. Seungri having already accepted his fate decided to go rifle around his Hyung’s things in his living room; picking up a sculpture here, touching a nicknack there, leaving fingerprints on his vinyl records...whoops, breaking off a piece of said sculpture. “Yah” Young-Bae called out to him. The maknae quickly put down the abstract sculpture and shoved the broken piece behind some books on the bookshelf. He looked to his Hyung who was whispering ‘he’s in there’ and pointing to the door that was left ajar. Again as if the two were in some Scooby-Doo cartoon, they carefully tiptoed into the sleeping man’s room. There sprawled out all over the bed, with half of the sheets and comforter dangling off the bed, was the sleeping form of their best friend. With his mouth parted and a slight trail of drool coming out of his mouth Ji-Yong let out a loud snore that startled the maknae causing him to step back onto a squeaky cat toy; Young-Bae slapped him on his shoulder. “Yah! Are you trying to to get us killed?!” he whispered loudly. “I thought you said you had nothing to worry about!” Seungri loudly whispered back. “I don’t! I’m just worried about you” the two of them continued their whisper argument only to be startled again. “Yah! If you two are done pretending like I can’t hear you, you can both kindly get the fuck out” Ji-Yong lifted his head up sleepily. “Sorry” the other two said in unison. “What do you even want at this hour?” he said plopping his head back into his sea of pillows and tangled bed sheets. “It’s three in the afternoon�� they said again in unison. Ji-Yong dazedly lifted his head again looking toward his window “No it's not there’s no sun” Walking to the window Young-Bae pulled the curtains back “that's because you live like a vampire and have black out curtains “ “Yah!” Ji-Yong struggled to bury himself under his sheets “What are you trying to kill me?!” “Ok enough” the dreaded man walked to his bedside “we dealt with your drunk ass last night, it's all been fun and games but now it’s time to wake the fuck up” he pulled him by the only foot that was sticking out of the covers. Ji-Yong clawing at his bed like a cat protested. “Come on man just get up!” “Do we have a photoshoot?” he asked in a muffled voice with his face firmly planted onto the mattress. “No?” “Music video shoot?” “No?” “An interview?”

“No?”

“A record to write?”

“No, Ji-Yong why--” “Then I have no good reason be even be conscious” he said taking his foot back “ “Seriously man come on, Seungri and I--” “Seungri?” Ji-Yong quickly lifted his head and snapped it in in their direction. “Yea Seungri, who the hell else did you think I was arguing with?” “I don’t know Young-Bae, I’ve stopped questioning the voices” The other two glanced at each other raising an eyebrow. The dazed man rubbed his face with his hand “Ok I’ll bite, why the fuck are you here?” “Because you can’t keep living like this! I hardly get to see you when we’re not on tour or doing some kind of press junket or variety show, even then we pretend like everything is all ok when it’s not. All you do is drink yourself stupid, complain while you're drunk, smoke so much that I swear one of these days you’re going to need an iron lung support or something! It’s like the Kwon Ji-Yong I grew up with doesn’t even exist anymore!” Ji-Yong pursed his lips “Tsk. What are you my girlfriend all of a sudden? Get in line you're not the only one who noticed. Any other complaints or can I just go back to sleep?” The dreaded man let out a heavy sigh “Pfft. yea right we’d all know where that would go real fast…” he said under his breath. “What was that?” he threw off the covers hopping off the bed and walking to square up to his best friend. Seungri, having been silent the entire time, noticed this was going to take a turn for the worse and intervened before any fists went flying. “Ji-Yong Hyung” He turned to glare at him. “Young-bae Hyung” he held up his hands between the two “Why don’t we just go to the kitchen and get some food and some coffee in you guys huh? We can eat a little, talk a little...not using harsh words...and just get rid of the bad energy from last night” The two older men glanced at each other “fine..” they said in unison and headed out toward the kitchen. “Hey Hyung” the maknae trailing behind the two spoke up again “Don’t you wanna maybe change out of your clothes from last night?” Ji-Yong stopped in his tracks to glare at him. “N-nevermind…” Along the way Ji-Yong stopped to boot up his laptop that was sitting on the kitchen island then made a b-line for the coffee maker and his pack of cigarettes. Young-Bae simply leaned against the furthest wall and looked down at his feet, still fuming about his little spat with his best friend. Seungri, even in everyday situations, made his way into the kitchen last. He caught a glimpse of his Hyung’s laptop screen and immediately stopped mid-step. Ji-Yong raised an eyebrow “what did some porn pop up or something?” he asked lighting his cigarette “N-no. just a picture of” he cleared his throat “Kim Tae-Hee popped up” he gave a weak smile.

The older man gave him a questioning look “Ahh ok?” and turned to ash his cigarette in the ashtray before him. His fingers slightly trembling from the actions of the previous night caused him to accidentally drop his cigarette into the sink. “Aish!” he hollered as he threw his now soggy cigarette into the bin and turned away from the other two to light another one. The maknae, wide eyed, looked to his other Hyung as a plea for help. Trying to subtly beg the dreaded man with his eyes that he needed him to distract Ji-Yong while he closes out of the webpage on the laptop’s screen; needless to say his actions were lost in translation. Young-Bae not understanding what the younger man was trying to tell him raised an eyebrow and mouthed ‘what?’, Seungri balled his fists in silent frustration and turned the screen toward his oblivious Hyung and emphatically pointed to the news article that blatantly held pictures of ‘DO NOT CALL HER’ in the arms of a man that wasn’t Ji-Yong and at the same exact club they were at the night before no less! Young-Bae went wide eyed and quickly dashed in the direction of the unsuspecting man before he could turn back around; he put his arm around his shoulder. Ji-Yong feeling suspicious about his two friend’s actions wasn't sure what to think; truthfully he didn’t want to think at all he’d much rather be back in bed ignoring everyone. The maknae glanced as his two Hyungs talked it out and as Young-Bae took it upon himself to have a death grip on Ji-Yong’s shoulder forcing him to look out the window as he poetically described the meaning of their friendship to him. Seungri acting quickly turned the laptop back toward him and carefully closed the article but not before looking at all the pictures and reading the headline. ‘Alexandra McMahon Out Partying in Seoul With Mystery Man: Keep reading for pictures below’. Oh shit he was really going to be in trouble now.

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