How You Turn My Word; Chapter 2
The day continues, and this time you find yourself in an entire new world... a world called The Underground.
Character; Lilia Vanrouge
Content; Gender-neutral reader, more shenanigans, reader isn't happy
Content Warning; Intoxication (Lilia), swearing
Word Count; 2.7 K
Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 |
Don't put my work into AI; I'll make sure you end up in the Bog of Eternal Stench.
Lilia’s night was not going according to plan and he was mentally cursing himself over it.
Thing Lilia did not plan for #1; he got lost. To be fair though, many a thing had drastically changed since the last time he romped around the mortal realm. A few hundred years would do that though. Humans now seemed to live in tall metal boxes rather than the humble cottages of ages past.
Thing Lilia did not plan for #2; a red flower deceiving him and containing something akin to liquor. So he was flying around lost while under the influence, which only worsened his situation. (Lilia did not know it, but the red flower was in fact a hummingbird feeder with sugar water which had been left out in the sun for too long and had fermented. Make sure to change your hummingbird feeder often on hot days so you don’t cause a nectar-loving friend to fly while wasted)
Thing Lilia did not plan for #3; getting himself stuff in one of those tall metal boxes, and he was now stuck inside some cursed metal labyrinth. At least it was not iron or silver, as it did not burn, apparently, humans no longer fortified their abodes with those metals. Perhaps the times have changed for the better?
But Lilia finally escaped the infernal metal labyrinth, perhaps luck was finally on his side tonight after all! He bumped around a few corners. My my, what a small hovel. Perhaps things have not changed all that much from the last time I was here… But Lilia was rudely pulled from his thoughts when something swatted him clean out of the air. And the culprit? A rather rotund grey cat with large blue eyes, which was now carrying Lilia into its lair, most likely to play with him for a bit before deciding that it had had it’s fun and ultimately put him out of his misery.
His night went from a jolly and somewhat embarrassing tale he would regale about at the local tavern, to a bedtime story parents would tell their children about the dangers of going places that you really shouldn’t. Should he get out of this sticky situation Lilia would not live this incident down.
The cat placed Lilia in a collection of socks and then sauntered off, calling out at the top of its lungs. Great, it's getting company for supper, and I’m the appetizer. How lovely. But Lilia knew he would have a better chance of getting out of this situation if he stayed calm and waited for an opportunity to escape. Even while tipsy, he could keep his cool.
And the feline was back and yanked Lilia out of the sock hole. Cracking open his one eye he saw that the cat did not come back with its hungry friends, but rather, a human. That was both good news and bad news. Good news; he most likely was not going to be eaten tonight! Yippee! Bad news; the last time he was in bat-form in a human’s abode, he was chased around with a torch, which he really did not want to go through again. So his best course of action was to play dead in this situation.
When the human left the room though, he took his chance and took flight once again, trying to find a way out. The cat was trying to catch him again, but Lilia knew of its tricks this time and dodged every swipe it sent his way.
But he was pulled out of his thoughts when the human screeched at the cat, “YOU CAUGHT A FUCKING BAT?!”
Oh yeah, they did not sound happy, not at all, but it seemed to be directed more at their feline companion rather than him.
As he was busy flapping around, trying to find an escape but to no avail, he also heard the human whispering to him. “Don’t fly towards my head, bat. I’m just trying to get you back outside. You’re a nice bat, right? Nice bat, nice bat.”
Were he not preoccupied and in a better state of mind, Lilia would have been amused by this. Currently, though he was occupied with trying not to be eaten and finding a way out of this cursed place. He was not in a laughing mood. All Lilia wanted to do was get back home, pass out in his bed but he would also be happy with his sofa as well, and pretend that this was nothing more than a bad dream after a night spent tavern hopping. Dealing with a horrid hangover would be better than this… and he was most likely going to have one of those anyways. Tonight really wasn’t Lilia’s night, not at all.
Then the human grabbed the cat, and Lilia was finally left alone. The window was open, but he didn’t know that, as his mind was too preoccupied with you know, not dying, that he hadn’t noticed that the human had opened it for him. So where did Lilia go? Well, he went back into the metal labyrinth (air duct), and fumbled around until he tired himself out. It wasn’t the most ideal of spots to crash for the night, but it was better than going back and possibly being eaten, Lilia would rather avoid that. So this was going to be his bed for the night, a lonely quiet corner of the air duct system, where he could hopefully wake up sober tomorrow. But he yearned for his warm quilts that awaited for him back at home, back in Faerie, or as some call it, the Underground.
Lilia wasn’t even supposed to be in the mortal realm in the first place, but curiosity had won him over, and he even ignored the travel advisory that was in place. Some crow fae had travelled there about a century or so ago and had yet to return back, hence a travel advisory. But yet here he was in the mortal realm, tiny, drunk, and utterly lost. His bad decisions could be looked into further detail once he got some shut-eye. So he wrapped himself in his wings and passed out in the corner of the air vent. Hopefully, when he woke up he could turn this disastrous day around.
…
Upon waking up, Lilia groaned — or rather, in this case, squeaked — and stretched his wings out. So the wretched metal maze and last night's fiasco was not some liquor-hazed dream; how lovely. Utterly delightful.
At least the strange maze echoed sound quite well, so he knew what exits to avoid. Not that one, he could hear a dog barking, and the feline encounter was enough for him. No, not that one either, he could hear children screaming.
Finally, he came to an opening, there was some quiet chatter, but it was far enough away where Lilia felt comfortable enough to explore this potential escape route.
Why does this look familiar? AM I BACK IN THE BUILDING?! Yes, yes he was. At least there was no sign of the ca–
“Mrp?” Speak of the devil.
The cat got out of its den and lept at Lilia, who dodged the attack, and the cat pushed some books off a desk. The cat was also screaming at him, and causing an all-around ruckus. Lilia managed to outmaneuver the feline, but soon a brand new human came into the scene.
The new human took one look at Lilia and backpedalled out of the room. But the human had just created another escape route for him, and Lilia flew, well, like a bat straight out of hell for it. Too bad the next room contained two more humans, including the one he had encountered from last night… maybe they would be nice again and spare him for trespassing on their small abode?
In the midst of the chaos, the human from last night knocked him out of the air with a broom. Okay, that hurt little Beastie. But that swing and the crash landing into a table caused Lilia to shift back into his human form, which also caused sparkles to happen. Did humans still think magic was evil? Well, he was about to find out.
Everyone remained silent, and after the sheer noise of the chaos, it was deafening, even the cat was quiet. And Lilia stared at the human that had knocked him out of the air, you. And you were staring straight back at him, looking utterly baffled. Well, this is awkward… I think I have overstayed my welcome…
Lilia snapped his fingers, and he started to disappear into sparkles yet again, this time going home since he wasn’t able to use his magic when stuck in bat form. And it was happening without a pinch, but you seemed to trip on thin air and crash landed on his feet, disappearing with him; a stowaway coming to Faerie.
… Well this is no good now, is it?
…
…
…
When the green sparkles subsided, you found yourself sitting in some sort of bog, and the water had made it into your mouth by some twist of fate. While you were busy spitting the bog water out of your mouth, the stranger was standing by the bank, dry, without any sulfuric-tasting water in his mouth, and looking better for wear.
Pulling yourself out of the bog water — eugh, you smelled like eggs now, great — you pointed an accusatory finger at him, water dripping from the end. “Where,” you spat out some extra bog water from your mouth, “am I? And why does it reak of eggs?!” You would have looked and sounded more imposing, but you were sopping wet, covered in mud, and spitting out coughs trying to get the bad taste out of your mouth; which wasn’t really commanding any sort of respect.
The stranger, Lilia, snorted before letting out a cough, trying to hide his amusement very poorly. He waved his hand, green sparkles surrounded you and you were now dry, still covered in mud, but dry. “Faerie, although some call it the Underground.”
You opened your mouth, but he wagged his finger at you. “And before you blame me for bringing you here, you have no one to blame for this but yourself!” Despite the cheeriness, there was something cold and off putting in his eyes, like he was calculating something. But that moment passed, and the almost annoying cheerful facade came back in full. “As for the smell? That so happens to be The Bog of Eternal Stench!”
“Like eternal eternal?” You really didn’t need to smell like rotten eggs for the rest of your days.
The stranger just chuckled, “Fret not, Beastie, I decided to return the favour, since your feline friend decided not to eat me. But it is indeed ‘eternal eternal’ if you don’t have the means to get rid of it.”
Beastie? “Uh, okay.” not the most eloquent of things to say, but really, could anyone blame you? You just fell through some kind of portal, magic(?) was real, and oh yeah, so were fae/faeries or whatever the hell they called themselves. So ‘Uh, okay’ was perfectly fine in this situation.
Mr. Sparkles — if he was going to call you Beastie, he deserved a dumb nickname — just gave you a smile, exposing the barest hint of his fangs; despite his small frame, he was still dangerous, and the hairs on the back of your neck stood on end. It was as if he was assessing you, to see if you would be worth the trouble to help. You didn’t know if either option would be good by the way his magenta eyes twinkled with mischief.
He let out a huff and started walking away, and you followed. “I wouldn’t recommend following me, Beastie,” he hummed, and you tripped over a rock, vines keeping you to the moss. “The court would not take kindly to you.”
You glared at him and tried ripping the vines off of your feet, but they didn’t budge. “And why should I listen to you?”
Mr. Sparkles booped you on the nose, “Well, it would ensure that you made it out of here alive, which I believe you would find beneficial and all.”
Obnoxious prick. But he did have a point, you would rather make it back home alive rather than fucking around and finding out (aka dying). “So what? Are you going to just leave me here? No welcome brochure? Thanks.”
You were being sarcastic, since it was either sarcasm or having a full-on existential crisis, since hey, magic wasn’t real in your world! Dimension? Galaxy? Where the fuck was this place?! How the hell did you end up here?!
“Hmm good point…” he snapped his fingers and there was now a book sitting in your lap. “This should suffice, do be warned though, Beastie, I may call on you later to return the favour. For now though,” he started to turn into green sparkles, “toodaloo!~” And he turned into a bat, flying off into the sunset, leaving you alone at the edge of the swamp with the only things to your name being the clothes on your back and a book in your lap.
How to Survive the Underground; For Humans! … Did he just give you this world’s equivalent of a For Dummies book? What the fuck? Was this kind of sick joke to him?
…
…
Once some of your ire had subsided, you decided to sit down on a boulder and read a bit of the book while there was still some sunlight out, but it was dipping into the horizon fast.
How to Survive the Underground; For Humans!
By Yelworc Erid
Preface …… i - iv
Chapter 1; Surviving Your First Night…… 1 - 10
Chapter 2; Edible Food for Humans …… 11 - 31
Chapter 3; The Basics of Fae Etiquette …… 32 - 35
3.1; Species Specifics …… 36 - 146
3.2; Government Specifics …… 147 - 169
Chapter 4; Help! I Have Been Indentured to a Fae! …… 170 - 200
Chapter 5; Adjusting to Fae Social Life …… 201 - 224
Chapter 6; Transmittable Illnesses & Diseases …… 225 - 261
Chapter 7; Fae Courting Practices …… 262 - 264
7.1; Species Specifications …… 265 - 366
7.2; Government Specifications …… 367 - 389
7.3; Accepting a Courting Proposal …… 390 - 393
7.4; Refusing a Courting Proposal …… 394 - 401
Chapter 8; How to Handle Fae Children …… 402 - 452
Chapter 9; How to Leave the Underground … 453
Chapter 10; Adjusting to Life in the Underground …… 454 - 482
Acknowledgments …… 483 - 485
Looking back up to the horizon, you quickly turned the pages to Chapter 1; Surviving Your First Night.
“If you are unable to find yourself some suitable shelter, one should find themselves safe by camping out in a rowan tree. These trees can easily be found by their vermillion clusters of berries. They keep away all native species of the Underground,” you read out loud, turning your attention to the trees nearby, searching for those berries. “Rowan tree, rowan tree–”
A loud screech coming from the undergrowth only pushed you further.
Nope, I do not want to find out what THAT was! Nope! NoPe! NOPE!
Finally, you found a tall enough tree and you hauled your ass up it like there was a fire below you, and you were up in the canopy, far enough up that nothing could reach you, but also high enough where you needed to be careful, since you didn’t want to meet an early death because you made a wrong move. But for now, you were safe.
“Nice try buddy,” you muttered to yourself, trying to get comfy. Wood wasn’t the comfiest thing in the world, but you weren’t really in the position to be complaining. “I am not on the menu.”
The screech came again, this time closer; yeah, you weren’t sleeping tonight. The sun was now beyond the horizon, and there was no moon, the only light coming from the stars above; it was very pretty, but you could see jack shit. This was going to be a long night… and not a fun one, since you could also see the glowing eyes of unknown creatures which were, quite frankly, freaky as fuck. So yeah, no sleep for you.
“This fucking sucks,” you grumbled, and a chittering from the bog seemed to mock you. “This really fucking sucks.”
…
…
…
…
Tags; @busycloudy, @eynnwwyjth, @identity-theft-101, @ithseem, @krenenbaker, @lucid-stories, @ryker-writes, @twistwonderlanddevotee, @xxoomiii
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Author's Note; This chapter is shorter, but it felt natural to end the chapter like this. This chapter, and the previous one, were both rewrites of an old WIP, so from here on out I don't have to rewrite! YIPPEE!!! Rewriting takes me forever, so we shall see what I come up with next.
If you liked this, do check out my masterlist for more content!
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Mer!MC Headcanons - Older Brothers
I said I'd write 'em, so here we are. They were getting stupidly long, so this is just the three older brothers.
The concept is that MC is a merperson from the human world who somehow found their way into the Devildom.
If people like these, then I may do the rest of the brothers.
read the younger brothers here and the side characters here
GN!mer!MC x Lucifer, Mammon, & Leviathan
Warnings: none
Lucifer
He first notices you at Diavolo's private beach. After a lot of pestering, Lucifer finally agreed to take a break there, but insisted on going alone. He's looking out across the sparkling ocean in a place where the artificial sunlight creates a soft glow. And that's when he sees you. First, just a tail, shimmering. And then the top of your head, hair and skin glistening as the ocean water drips from you. He feels your eyes on him, even though you're far out in the waves.
Lucifer stands on the shore, letting the waves trickle around his ankles. He won't go too far. He's waiting for you to come to him. He knows you will. And in the end, you do. Swimming in slow, large circles, each round bringing you closer and closer to where he waits. You're wary of him - you're from the human world and you aren't familiar with demons. But this one looks strong. When you get close enough, he smiles, completely disarming you.
And he will take the time to find out who you are and where you came from. He asks about your life in the human world, how you ended up in the Devildom. When he deems you harmless, he finds himself focusing more on how entrancing you are. The way you bob in the water, the brightness of your scales, the delicate magic that hums beneath your skin.
Lucifer comes back over and over to the private beach. The others are surprised, but they don't question it because he so rarely takes breaks. But Lucifer only wants to see you. He'll ask you if you want to come back with him. He's found a spell that will allow you to have legs. He will accept your decision either way and in the end, he knows you'll always need to return to the sea. But for now, will you take his hand, MC?
Mammon
He heard that there was a treasure chest at the bottom of one of the Devildom's many deep dark lakes. So he goes diving with an underwater breathing spell and nearly has a heart attack when he finds you instead. You hide behind a large rock, just as frightened of him, then peek around it as Mammon recovers himself. You both stare at each other for a long time, neither one feeling brave enough to come closer. But Mammon can't talk to you like this.
He swims to the surface, breaking into the Devildom air. Your head slowly rises from the water a few feet away from him. He asks you who you are. Mammon wants to know how you got here and where you're from. He's treading water as best he can, but he's losing strength. So you swim over and take it upon yourself to escort him to shore. He blushes profusely as you grab hold of his waist and use your powerful fin to propel him out of the deep water.
Mammon is dripping on the shore of the lake, just talking to you. You spend so much time chatting, he completely dries out. He finds a kindred spirit in you - shiny treasure is something you enjoy, too. And you can tell that he's interested in your tail. You get as close to the land as you dare, flopping out the end of your tail beside him. He touches it carefully, the rings on his fingers catching your eye as he moves them across your scales. You shiver at the touch.
When Mammon comes back to the lake, he finds you waiting on the shore, your tail wrapped around a large treasure chest. He falls to his knees in front of you. You lean across the chest and tell him you found what he had been looking for in the lake. He takes your hands. Don't ya know that he already found the treasure in this lake, MC? You're more precious to him than any chest. He still takes the chest, but not before he takes out the shiniest jewel to give to you, along with a promise to return.
Leviathan
It's at Siren Beach where Levi first meets you. He's there to visit Lotan, of course, but before he has a chance to say hello to his old friend, he spots you there in the water. You're immediately interested in him. Something about him makes you want to come closer. He's cautious about you, not sure what a merperson like you would be doing here at this beach.
Despite the pull he has on you, you're skittish about getting too close. But Levi doesn't wait around for you to come to him. He's concerned about you and what you're doing in Lotan's area. He takes the initiative to swim out toward you. His swimming skills impress you. The ocean is calm here, but his arms are strong and steady. He reaches you easily.
You can't help getting playful with him, swimming around him in circles before he finally manages to get you to slow down a little. He gets you to tell him who you are and where you're from. He's a little baffled about a human world merperson getting all the way out here. But he's distracted when Lotan arrives and it's clear right away that you've already befriended the great sea beast.
The three of you play together in the ocean for hours. Levi comes back to visit Lotan, but he finds himself looking forward to seeing you, too. As he gets closer to you, he starts to think you'd be better off back in your own home. He brings it up to you one day. He can find a way to bring you back to the human world. When you shut that idea down and tell him you'd rather stay in the Devildom with him and Lotan, he gets flustered. Y-you don't have to stay just for him, MC! You wrap your tail around him and pull him close so he understands why you have no plans to leave. You enjoy the way his blush deepens.
younger brothers | side characters | masterlist | Thank you for reading!
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“Nine would have treated Martha better than Ten did”
I need to talk about this argument that never seems to stop circulating.
Note: Not a venomous/anti post. There’s more than enough of that across fandom spaces as is, and this is supposed to be a place for ✨sweet, blissful escapism✨
When making this argument, people seem to envision a scenario in which Nine never met Rose.
While I can appreciate a good hypothetical, recognizing Rose's significance to the Doctor (Nine and Ten) is essential to understanding why things with Martha played out the way they did in the first place.
In the third series, the Doctor is grieving. This grief is deliberately threaded into nearly every script, whether spoken aloud or not (and these are just a few examples):
He's burning in Rose’s wake the entire time Martha travels with him, which is why it’s so frequently called upon: It’s 100% deliberate in framing his grief. He grieved as Nine too, of course— having been fresh on the heels of the Time War — but then he met Rose, which changed everything.
Back then, he was still a rude, traumatized pain in the ass, but we watch Rose soften more of those jagged edges with every episode as they grow closer; as he lets his guard down and forms a deep connection with her.
He falls in love (against his better judgment) and it's game over.
And yes: provided S1E1 had been titled 'Martha', one can realistically assume things might have unfolded similarly to how they did with Rose. However, it wouldn’t have been that way just because the Doctor was Nine and “Nine was different” — it would be because he wasn’t already in love with someone else. The same can't be said for the start of S3.
Think of it like this: if Rose AND Martha had been in that cellar — if Nine had taken both of them along with him in S1 — we’d eventually be looking at the most melodramatic love triangle ever, what with him living in close quarters with two brilliant, gorgeous, compassionate young women... But Doctor Who is plenty “soap opera” as is with just one woman in the TARDIS.
(I certainly wouldn’t object to reading that fic, though)
Now, regarding the unrequited elephant in the room…
His inability to be romantic with Martha isn’t because he thinks her lesser, nor is it for lack of compatibility. It isn't because Rose is any better than her. It certainly isn’t just because he’s Ten.
It’s really only for one reason, which can't be denied — and now I’m a broken record:
He is still in love with Rose.
(cut from a tenrosedaily gif)
Nine is Ten, and Ten is only such a mess in S3 because he’s just lost the love of his life. Martha merely got caught in the crosshairs of a volatile Time Lord in mourning, and yes — it sucks. Absolutely.
But it also feels dismissive to chalk Ten and Martha’s relationship up to little more than some sort of mindless dance of pining, jealousy, and toxicity.
Ten trusted Martha with his life over and over again — and hers, with him. He constantly praised her brilliance, happily carting her around time and space with no intention of letting her go. In the BBC’s extended universe of novels/comics/cartoons/etc, there’s so much depth to their relationship: love and trust and trauma and sacrifice. They had their own special bond as mates, their own complexities — so it’s a bummer that it's forever overshadowed by the other things.
I’m not denying that there was a lot of stuff that sucked/was for sure toxic about Ten's S3 behavior, but so many of the things I've seen him catching flak for can be directly attributed to being A Clueless Fucking Alien Idiot (not a trait that’s unique to Ten) — as well as his flat-out obliviousness to Martha’s feelings.
So yes, I agree: if Rose never existed, he would have treated Martha differently as Nine. He also would have treated her differently as Ten. Certainly.
But Rose did exist, and when discussing canon, it matters.
“He tells me that he absolutely, 100% loves Rose... He tells me how my daughter; my wonderful, beautiful, clever little girl saved him from himself before… And he says that’s all because of me! I made her into the Rose Tyler that saved him.”
-Jackie Tyler, Flight Into Hull!
Martha got the short end of the stick in S3. She came round at the wrong place and time, but that doesn't mean it was all bad. It doesn't mean the Doctor didn’t adore her. It certainly doesn't mean the time they spent together was wasted or worthless. They were brilliant!
Sure, he could be a twat, but let it be known that he was a twat with Rose as well, both as Nine and Ten. I’m sure Tentoo can be plenty infuriating, too. So while I'll defend Ten (and Tentoo) into the ground forever and ever and ever, I'll concede that he's fucked up.
The Doctor is a certified Pain In The Ass. It’s one of the things I love so much about this character — dynamics.
But never forget that Martha was goddamn tough as nails and overcame every bit of it. She moved on with her life, and the Doctor moved on with his. One can only pray that, when they inevitably drag her back onto the show (which feels inevitable if I'm honest), we see at once that she's been living her best life for all these years.
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4 for the ship writing thingie :)
4. a kiss where it hurts
The movement in the corner of his eye catches his attention, and Zuko smiles. "Good morning," he says, finishing his sentence and glancing up at his bed.
He's at the small desk in his bedroom, the one that has a strict no-paperwork rule on it. Letters, though, are allowed, and Zuko reads over the drying characters on his correspondence to Katara before frowning and looking up. There is no obnoxiously loud yawning or ridiculous stretching coming from his love, not even a mumbled "five more minutes" or tired groan.
Zuko gets up, stretching his wrist for a second before walking over to Sokka's side of the bed (a phrase that still sends a thrill running through Zuko every time he thinks about it) and sitting on the edge.
"Hey, love," he says softly, resting his hand on Sokka's shoulder. Sokka doesn't say anything, and Zuko's heart twists. "Is it your leg?"
Sokka lets out the tiniest of affirmative hums. Zuko stands up and Sokka turns his head to look up at him, his eyes pleading in a way that breaks Zuko's heart.
"I'll be right back. I'm just going to send for some warm towels," he says quietly, and Sokka's expression is replaced with a soft smile.
When Zuko returns to the bed, he notices how Sokka has moved closer to the center of the bed, his back still to Zuko in a silent invitation. Zuko accepts it, crawling into the bed behind him and wrapping his arm around Sokka to pull his back into Zuko's chest to hold him. He feels Sokka's tense muscles relax in his embrace, and after a few minutes he lets out a sigh. "Thank you," he says.
"Of course," Zuko says, planting a kiss on his shoulder, then another one when there is a gentle knock on the door and he slips out to grab the bowl of towels.
A minute later, Zuko has coaxed Sokka into rolling onto his back and letting Zuko slide a pillow under his knee. Zuko shoots pointed looks at Sokka whenever he tries to do something before Zuko does, and by the time Sokka is settled, he's watching his partner with a fond smile as he finally starts putting the towels in their place. One on either side of his leg, then before he puts one over his knee, Zuko leans down and gives the joint a gentle kiss. It's so soft that Sokka can hardly feel it, but it makes him feel better all the same.
"I hope you don't have any early meetings," Sokka mutters as Zuko joins him on the bed again. "Because I'm going to go crazy unless you stay here for a while to keep me company."
Zuko smiles, kissing him on the lips before wrapping his arms around Sokka. "The world can wait, love. I'm not going anywhere."
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