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prettywordsyouleft · 6 years ago

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Overheard

Summary: Even though you loved Taekwoon, being the partner of a celebrity always came with hearing what others thought of you.

Pairing: Jung Taekwoon (Leo) x reader

Genre: married idol au / angsty fluff? Tbh I don’t know what to label this one

Warnings: feelings of insignificance

A/N: requested by anon. I really loved that k-drama but gosh it’s been forever since I watched it. I think I remember the scene you mean though. Either way your request spurred me in this direction. Sorry it’s not a boyfriend story but I’m sure this detail change shouldn’t be too much of an issue!

Word count: 2599

You were used to the underhanded comments. You had heard them for as long as you had been dating Taekwoon. At first, they hadn’t bothered you as you had anticipated the backlash of disgruntled fans. But you loved Taekwoon more than anything else in this world. You were genuine, heck you had risked your job as VIXX’s senior coordinator just for your love. In your eyes, putting everything on the line for Taekwoon had meant something major to you.

To others though, your actions were seen as the problem.

“How convenient, the star who fell in love with the staff.”

“She’s only after her quick grab on fame herself. Did you see her? She’s not pretty at all, so she couldn’t get into the limelight in any other way.”

“She had to have seduced him. There’s nothing special about her. Wow, what does oppa see in her? She’s just old and frumpy.”

It hadn’t been your idea to go public with your relationship. It had remained a secret for an entire year because of the implications dating you had for him. Taekwoon hated hiding how much he loved you, yet you knew how much more he had to lose than you did. Your career was a huge part of you, and you had worked years to get up to this point. Even if you were an essential key to the smooth running of group and individual activities, you knew your role could ultimately be replaced and you could work elsewhere if needed. Yet his singing career could be shattered forever if the public took your relationship negatively. And because of this, you had broken up with him several times, not wanting to be the cause of ending his hopes and dreams just because you held feelings for him.

Those intense feelings brought you back to his side every time. It was the way he would look at you as if you were the only one he saw in this world that helped you through when the relationship suddenly was released by Dispatch, and his endless reassurances that you would both be okay was how you overcame the backlash. Most fans accepted Taekwoon’s happiness with you at his side, and the comments lessened.

But they never quite stopped.

Now, five years on, married and with children, you had hoped that your place at Taekwoon’s side would be measured up by the true definition of love and balance. You had done more than enough for the entertainment industry and had even gained endorsements yourself when you were newlyweds and again when you were pregnant with your first child. It had enabled you to use your position to voice things that mattered to you, and to other women alike. You had become an ambassador of women’s rights and supported many pregnancy and motherhood led initiatives.

Instead of seeing it as receiving fame by being Taekwoon’s wife, you had continued to use your strengths as a person to be effective and find ways to help others.

Doing so meant others had something to talk about you, however.

“Does she think she’s the newest Mother Theresa? She’s only the wife of a singer, not someone powerful in this nation.”

“I’m so sick of seeing her face branded for helping women, you can see right through her scheme it’s to keep her husband’s career relevant. His fans are too old and have families of their own to support now instead of paying his bills. Gosh, they need to go be quiet somewhere in the country.”

“Have you seen her body? After having her two kids she’s really let herself go.”

“Was there much there to let go of beforehand?!”

The hardest thing was overhearing these comments from the people who you worked alongside on campaigns. Yet you didn’t falter, not once. You weren’t doing the things you had done so to please these people. You didn’t have anything to prove either.

“Why do you let them talk about you like that?” Jaehwan’s wife, Tori asked and you glanced at your friend, smiling weakly. “They’re talking absolute rubbish about you, yet again! Weren’t they just praising your efforts on the new scheme to help victims of sexual abuse?”

“Let them be, they clearly aren’t happy with their own lives and need something to gossip about. They’re not hurting anyone.”

“Except you,” she mentioned, concern etched within her gaze. “Y/N, you really need to-”

“I’m fine, I promise. I’ve had this for the entirety of my relationship with Taekwoon, it’s nothing new.”

“It’s shouldn’t be something you’re fine with,” Tori said sadly, shaking her head and glaring over at the women in their fancy dresses discussing other guests at the event. “Taekwoon sure wouldn’t like to hear about this.”

“And he won’t,” you replied firmly.

It had been the one thing you had carried silently within. You weren’t naïve; of course Taekwoon had his fair idea of what the public had said in the past. But things were different now. The rumours and negative comments weren’t penned in online forums but by the people you collaborated with. It was harder for him, especially when he still had a somewhat busy career, to find out about such talk.

And you wanted it to remain that way.

“Get dressed, we’re going out,” he proclaimed and you glanced up at your husband from your laptop. On one side of you was your daughter napping and your son was sprawled out on the floor watching television. On the other side was a stack of proposals you had to get through this weekend to decide on the focus for next month at work.

You laughed softly. “You’ve just come home from the tour in Japan, aren’t you tired? Where are we meant to be going?”

“To my parents’ house,” he announced and your son diverted his gaze from his show immediately.

“To Grandma and Grandpa’s?!”

“That’s right,” Taekwoon confirmed and even your daughter stirred enough to catch on to her brother’s excitement. You watched your husband curiously. He grinned. “We can drop the kids off for the night.”

“Are we really getting to stay over?” your son asked once more as your daughter squealed in delight.

“Of course! They’re already planning the best sleepover!”

“Really?!” your daughter was up off the sofa you and she were upon and went running down the hallway to get her favourite toys together.

You sighed. “What have you planned?”

“I want to take my beautiful wife out.”

“Where’s she right now? I only see me here,” you teased, looking down at your sweats and reaching to touch your messy bun on your head.

Taekwoon shifted over to you and kissed you on the forehead. “She’s right here. Come on, you’ve been working non-stop and with me gone you had to look after the kids for the whole week. Let me spoil you. I’ll drop them off and you focus on getting ready.”

“How ready do I need to be? Date in a movie theatre ready or dinner at an expensive restaurant ready?”

He grinned. “You and your need to know everything. Just wear something that can do both. I’m not telling you anything!”

“Why did I marry you?” you asked as you closed your laptop, smiling to yourself all the same. “Not knowing things is my weakness!”

“I know and I’m going to use it well to make you remember exactly why you said I do all those years ago!” he called after you as you headed down the hallway, kissing both kids on their heads as you passed on by.

You couldn’t deny the excitement that built within at the idea of having a night with just Taekwoon. Sure, you often collapsed on the sofa together most nights but there wasn’t much said in those moments. You were both satisfied with your efforts throughout the day and glad that the kids were fed, bathed and tucked away in their beds. Tonight, you’d get the chance to really spend time with Taekwoon. To talk, laugh and hopefully do something other than fall asleep as soon as your head hit the pillow. The longer you thought about it as you got dressed in your favourite black dress that seemed to tick any and every box of date night standards, you realised how much you missed spending more time together. Having your children was something you’d never regret, yet sometimes you forgot what it was like before you had them. How you didn’t have to fight for his attention with two excitable little humans talking a million miles a second about their days to their attentive father. Even though you loved that scene too, tonight would be all about just you and him.

A small giggle left you and you continued to get ready, waiting for Taekwoon to return for you. And when he did, his eyes soaked you in hungrily, his lips soon finding yours. “Maybe we should stay inside instead. I don’t know if I want to take you away from here now.”

“I didn’t just spend all that time fighting with my eyeliner to have you keep me here. We’re going out!” you exclaimed and Taekwoon chuckled, kissing you again briefly before he took your hand and led you out to the car. After twenty minutes, you looked at your husband determinedly. “Where are we going?”

“I told you I wasn’t going to give you any hints.”

“What if I guess where then will you answer?” you compromised and Taekwoon laughed.

“You’re distracting me from driving. Stop being so adorable, baby.” You bit your lip and sat back in your chair, gloating with the warmth of his affectionate sentence. And before you could try again to guess the destination, Taekwoon drove the car into an underground parking lot. You read the names of the companies that used this facility and gasped, realising where he was taking you.

“You’ve brought me to see Jaehwan’s new musical?!” you enquired and Taekwoon nodded.

“And then dinner after, how does that sound?”

“Perfect!”

The show had been magnificent and you were now seated in a neighbouring restaurant waiting for your meal to arrive when you noticed a group of ladies being escorted to a nearby table. You diverted your gaze to your glass of water and sighed. Your reaction wasn’t lost on Taekwoon. “Do you know them? Oh, isn’t that Kim Soobin, one of the women you work with?”

“Yeah, they must have been at the show as well.”

“Do you want to leave?” he asked, his expression puzzled by your now quiet demeanour. You shot him a strained smile as you shook your head. “But you look uncomfortable.”

“I want to share a meal with you,” you insisted, reaching over the table for his hand. You held it gently and smiled more genuinely this time. “Let’s stay.”

“Y/N?” a voice called out and you blinked rapidly as you glanced up. Soobin smiled graciously. “Oh, it is you. Hello, Taekwoon, it’s been a while since I last saw you!”

“Hello, are you well?”

“Better now that I’ve seen you both! Did you watch the musical as well? Fabulous, wasn’t it?”

“Yes, it was very charming,” you mentioned and then got to your feet. “Would you excuse me, I just need to use the bathroom.”

“Of course, darling, I’ll talk with you next week at the office!” Soobin called after you as you moved off to the bathroom, standing in front of the mirrors and staring at your wide-eyed expression. Why were you anxious about running into Soobin? It wasn’t as if you had anything to feel inferior about around the woman. She was the wife of a politician and chose to work in a few various committees to simply keep her nose in among the gossip. Was that why you were frazzled by her appearance? Or had you wanted time tonight for just you and Taekwoon that having anything or anyone from your usual environment appear had diminished your joyous mood? You weren’t sure but you focused on composing yourself, smiling at your reflection before you stepped back out and went back to your table.

It was empty.

Following a familiar voice, you gasped when you found Taekwoon towering over the five ladies seated at their table. “Did you think purposely raising your voices as you gossip about my wife loud enough that I could hear would make me feel frustrated enough to come and rage at you to stop?”

“Oh Taekwoon, we weren-”

Taekwoon merely stopped to take a breath before cutting Soobin off. “You were basically asking for me to step over here. And I have, though not to do what you’re hoping for. Keep talking. Keep saying vicious things and making yourselves feel good about who you are whilst you spout nonsense. Everyone around you is well aware of how lonely you all are because you have busy husbands. Those husbands you find out what they’re feeling and doing by reading the news or social media posts they make instead of ringing home to tell you instead. Keep talking yourselves up to be amazing mothers and wives whilst under appreciating the hard work of others despite having in-house staff that keep your homes running so you can enjoy outings like this instead of tucking your children into bed and getting to know what they dream of. I implore you to continue. Because at the end of the day your lives are the sad ones, not my wife’s. I don’t care what you say about her, at all. Do continue. Your words mean nothing when I know how vastly different your world is from ours.”

“Excuse me?!”

“Oh, your meals are here. Enjoy,” Taekwoon mentioned, bowing slightly and returning to your table. He glanced up at you standing where you had stopped to listen on and smiled. “Ah there you are, our dinner is ready!”

You sat down at the table and smiled weakly. “You should have ignored them.”

“Is that what you do?” he asked softly as he cut into his steak with more force than needed. You didn’t answer right away and Taekwoon sighed. “You face so much more than I realised. I’m so sorry.”

“I’m fine.”

“I’m not but I won’t leave until we’re done eating. They don’t deserve the satisfaction of ruining someone else’s night.”

You grinned up at your husband. “Who said our night is ruined? You were right with what you said; our world is different, so let’s enjoy it whilst the night is still young, hm?”

“I love you, Y/N. I’m so glad you choose to be at my side, even if others don’t appreciate you, I do.”

“Woon-ah,” you called him affectionately, still smiling. “The people who matter do appreciate me. Sure, I’ll have to deal with their behaviour over the next week from you standing up for me like that but I’d happily ignore all their negativity if it means waking up next to you every day. I love you too.”

“Let’s not stay for dessert,” he announced pettily, and you giggled at seeing how red his neck was. “I think we can find something better elsewhere.”

“You told me to dress for anything. Ice-cream in the car whilst taking a late night drive sounds good to me, what do you think?”

“Anywhere is perfect if you’re there too.”

“Where else would I be? My husband is actually at my side and I don’t have to use social media to track him down either.”

Taekwoon blushed. “You heard it all huh?”

“Every word. It was quite the performance.”

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squirrel-moose-winchester · 6 years ago

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Chapter 14

Title: Falling for the Holidays

Pairing: Dean x Reader AU

Word Count: 4719

Summary: With October ending and the holidays underway, that only meant one thing for Dean Winchester. It meant returning to his childhood home and spending time with his family. It meant listening to his parents, especially his mom, ramble on and on about when he was going to find himself a nice girl, bring her home for the holidays, and then eventually get married and have children. However, Dean wasn’t ready for that sort of commitment, so in order to get his family off his back, he comes up with an elaborate scheme! But like the saying goes, “sometimes lies become truths.”

Warnings: Explicit Language, Angst, Arguing, Terribly written Donna (I can’t write her to save my life so I don’t know why I used her as a character), Consumption of Alcohol, Drunkenness, and I think that’s it.

A/N: Sorry everyone for taking so long with this chapter. I’ve been struggling a little with my personal issues so writing had proven a little difficult. But now I’m feeling a little better and banged out this baby in two days. And to make up for the long wait, this chapter is pretty lengthy. This is a loaded chapter and it moves fast paced, so I hope it’s okay and that it doesn’t seem a little too rushed. I just needed to move the series along so that we can get to the good stuff! Please let me know what you thought! I adore and appreciate the feedback! Thank you everyone for being so patient with me! xx

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Dean knew all along, but despite that, it didn’t prepare him for the confirmation out of Lisa’s mouth. Ben was his. He had a four-year old kid. One that he didn’t even know about since recently.

Lunch was eaten in silence, Dean trying to wrack his brain around everything, while Lisa was just too afraid to say anything, not wanting to chance it and make him angry. It wasn’t until Dean was nearly done with his food did he finally speak.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” He asked. It was a simple question but it was a loaded one as well.

“I was too afraid to tell you. I know that’s no excuse, but we were broken up and you were leaving for college. I’m sorry. I was just… I was too scared.” Dean sighed. He couldn’t blame Lisa for being afraid, but Dean deserved to know. But he knew now, and that’s all that mattered, right? Dean was an understanding guy, wasn’t he? Yes, he was. His mom raised him to be a gentleman, and that was how he was going to handle this. Like a real man.

“You should have told me. We could have figured things out.”

“I know… I’m sorry,” Lisa choked, trying to keep her tears at bay, not wanting to worry her son… their son.

“Hey, hey. Come here,” Dean called, opening his arms for Lisa.

She wiggled out of her seat and slowly made her way towards Dean, letting him hold her as she sat next to him. She quickly felt at ease, meeting Ben’s eyes before smiling. Ben smiled in return, taking another bite of his burger, smearing ketchup and mustard over his cheeks.

As calm as Dean pretended to be on the outside, he was a floundering mess on the inside. He had no idea how to be a father, and he had no idea how he was going to build a relationship with his son and not fuck things up.

Speaking – or thinking about – fucking things up… there was the ordeal with you. You kissed him, and despite needing to be with Lisa and their son, he wanted nothing more than to rush into your apartment and kiss you again. Show you just how much you mean to him and how much he wished he was with you, but things were just too complicated. Life wouldn’t be life it was easy, right?

While Dean was with Lisa and Ben, you were alone in your tiny apartment laying face down on your comfortably worn couch, with your head buried in your favorite plaid throw pillow, the one Cass made for your birthday. It was lumpy and was a far cry from a square shape, but the fact that he made it didn’t only make it hilarious, it was genuine. You loved it so much.

Suddenly, there was a knock on your door. The tapping timidly soft. Your heart clenched wondering who it could be, until you heard a familiar face.

“Y/N?” It was Cass! Coincident? You think not. You had thought about him and the universe delivered him to your doorstep!

Without hesitation, you sprung off the couch, retching the door open before colliding your small body into his much larger and muscular one. You could feel his body tense under your grasp, but quickly relaxed as his arms cradled around your back.

“What are you doing here?” The words came out mumbled against his chest, but still coherent for him to understand.

“Jo called me. She said she saw Dean at Lafitte with…” he cleared his throat, “... with someone from his past, so I thought I’d come check on you.” You wanted to laugh at his use of words however, you were glad that he didn’t say her name. You couldn’t bare it at the moment.

“Did I ever tell you you’re an angel?” You muttered. Cass didn’t say a word, but he smiled, tightening his hold around you.

Meanwhile, Ketch was sitting outside your apartment in the parking lot, thinking about what he was going to say to you. He had witnessed you kiss the man you were in love with and he was beginning to get frustrated. He wasn’t making any progress with you. He needed to think of a way to get you on his side and start believing that you didn’t need Dean, didn’t want Dean. He needed you to believe you wanted him.

“C’mon Ketch, get it together. You can do this. You have women eating out of the palm of your hands. You can get one girl to fall in love with you...” he gave himself a pep talk.

With one final breath, he hopped out of his car, taking his time to get to your apartment, still processing what exactly he was going to say to you. He was sure that you already had some sort of feelings for him, how strong were they? He wasn’t sure, but he just needed to get himself out of the friend zone and into the potential zone. You were the first woman he really had to work for and it was infuriating, but at the same time, there was something inside him that was being a tad irrational. He was getting confused.

You and Cass had just sat down on your couch, the angelic man eyeing the throw pillow next to you. “When are you going to throw that horrid thing away? It’s been two years,” he spoke, referring to the gift he had given years ago.

“What are you talking about? I’m never throwing this away! You made it for me, and it happens to be my favorite pillow!” Cass has heard you say those words a million times, but he still can’t believe you actually like, let alone love, the pillow he made you. But regardless, it warmed his heart. You were like the little sister, or cousin, he wished he had. His family were a bunch of dicks, with a few who were tolerable.

Just as you and Cass got comfortable, another knock came from your door. You started at crystal blue eyes as they stared back at you with confusion. “Who could that be?” You pondered out loud, a little disappointed. You wanted to tell Cass everything that happened, but was rudely interrupted.

“Would you like me to answer it for you?” Cass offered. You nodded in response, your heart hammering in anticipation.

What if it was Dean?! What would you do or say then?

Cass lifted himself off the couch and made his way towards the door, twisting the knob slowly before peeling the wooden surface ajar. He was met with a strange man he’s never seen before, his brows furrowing together, lips parting, in his signature lost puppy look.

“Oh. I wasn’t aware that Y/N had a visitor. I’m sorry, is she home?”

“If you mean Y/N has friends, then yes she does. A lot actually,” Cass sassed, not liking the aura he got from the man before him. Cass was pretty intuitive.

“I wouldn’t doubt it. Is she here?” Ketch asked.

“And whom should I announce is here to see her?”

“I’m her friend, Ketch. She left her things in my car so I thought I’d drop them off.”

“Cass, who is it?” You asked, now standing beside him. When he didn’t respond, busy starting down whoever was at the door, you shifted to his side so you could peek around him. Your eyes widened, completely forgetting about Ketch. “Ketch!”

“Y/N,” he greeted, giving you a sweet smile.

“Oh my gosh! I am so sorry! Please come in,” you slipped from under Castiel’s arms so that you were standing in front of him. You used your body to press up against your long time friend, shoving him backwards as he adamantly resisted you. Cass kept his eye on the British man, squinting, unsure if he could trust him.

When you were finally able to get Cass to step back enough to give Ketch enough space, he walked in, setting your bag on the faded love couch. “You forgot your bag, so I thought I’d come drop it off, as well as see how you were doing, but it seems you’ve got someone else already doing that,” he forced a smile on his face as he glanced over at Cass again, who was still glaring.

“Uh, yeah. Cass is a really good friend of mine. Cass, this is Ketch. He’s a friend I met on the plane ride back here,” you introduced.

“I see. It’s ni—,” Cass cut himself off, “it was unexpected to meet you.”

“Yes. Quite unexpected,” Ketch replied, clearly not happy with Castiel’s presence, as he eyed him down. He wondered if Cass was another hurdle he’d have to jump over to have you. “Let me guess… the Lincoln outside is yours?” Ketch asked.

“Yes. Is there a problem?” Castiel replied.

“Not at all. It’s just… it matches your trench coat,” Ketch scoffed, as if it was supposed to be a compliment.

“What’s wrong with my trench coat. It was given to me by my dearest friend,” he defended. That trench coat was indeed given by a dear friend of his – Dean.

“Umm, anyways…” your eyes shifted between both men standing in your house. Ketch I am so sorry for ditching you like that. I hope you didn’t worry too much about me. That’s the last thing I want. I don’t want to cause you trouble. I just had a lot on my mind, and I guess I was a little overwhelmed.”

Ketch’s attention fell on you while Cass was transfixed on the other man, untrustingly. “It was no trouble, and I completely understand. I just want to let you know before I go, that I’m here for you. If you ever need to talk, you have my number. I’ll pick you up, meet you here, and we can go anywhere you’d like.”

“Thanks Ketch. I really appreciate it.”

“Don’t mention it.” Ketch leaned in, giving you a hug, and behind his back, you could see Castiel tensing.

When Ketch pulled away, he gave you a quick kiss on the forehead, a sentiment he’s never done before. To be honest, it was a little weird. Kind of like he was overstepping the boundary. Yes, you liked him, a flicker of a crush in your heart for the man, and stray thoughts of maybes and what ifs swarming around the idea of being with him, but on the scale… your feelings for him had no match for the feelings you held Dean. If Ketch had a chance, he’d be waiting a long time for that to happen, unless you sold out on yourself and tried to use him as a means to an end, but also to the beginning of something that could work?

Once Ketch was gone, Cass glared at you like a father waiting for his guilty child to explain. You let out a deep sigh, falling onto your couch, Cass along with you, and you told him everything. Every. Single. Thing.

After that, Jo came around and you had to explain it a second time. A day latter, you found yourself explaining to Castiel’s girlfriend, Meg! Why? You weren’t sure. You didn’t even know her that well. But after a week had past, everyone was caught up and has accepted everything that’s happened. A fake relationship gone terrible wrong.

One week turned to two weeks, and soon Christmas was only a couple of weeks away, and no one had barely talked to Dean. Jo had a handful of short conversations, and Castiel was able to get one heart to heart talk with his best friend, but that was it. You had gotten no contact from him, and when you’d try to call him once, it rang twice before going straight to voicemail. Obviously, he had ignored your call, and that was enough to crush you.

According to Cass, Dean had found out that Ben was his kid. That was news you ever not expecting. It had taken a few days for you to settle with that information, but it made sense why Dean was always MIA. He has been busy trying to jump into fatherhood. Balancing school in hopes to graduate and learning to be a father was apparently time consuming.

BUT – and maybe you were just bitter – you were damn sure that if his friends mattered, he’d make the time. He’d make the time to have lunch with you and the others, he’d try to talk to you, even if it was through texting. He’d try something. But alas, Dean was drifting further and further away from you. From all of you. Just because of some girl. Just because of some kid.

Wanting to beat yourself up, you scolded yourself for having those thoughts. You didn’t give a rat’s ass about Lisa, but Ben wasn’t just some kid. He was Dean’s kid. And you couldn’t blame the four-year old for who his parents were. And you couldn’t blame yourself for feeling disappointed either.

Not only was Dean back with his ex, his first love, he had a baby with her! A living breathing person!

But what could you do about it? Zilch. Nada. Nothing what so ever.

With everthing that was happening, you had hung out with Ketch a few times since the encounter with him and Castiel, and eventually, your relationship had diminished into mostly texting everyday with a possible phone call. Once in a while you’d catch him around town and you’d stop to say hello, or sometimes he’d walk into your workplace ordering a coffee and scone, all the while flirting with you shamelessly. Even your co-workers couldn’t keep to themselves, butting into your conversations and business.

Things were starting to get better – which surprised you.

One night, you decided that you were determined to get the old you back with a night out with the girls! You and Jo rallied up all your lady friends, and headed out to the local bar, on a Friday night, and the place was packed as always!

“I’ll find us a table!” Charlie shouted over the blaring music, “you know what I like!”

“I’m gonna go with her!” Bess announced. Bess was a good girl. She never drank and was always happy to be the DD. All that mattered to her was having a good time and making sure everyone got home safe. You loved Bess. Every group of friends needed a Bess.

After grabbing the first round, and a few shots later, everyone was on the dance floor, grinding against one another, laughing, drinking, just letting loose, and for the first time in a long time, it was like you and Dean never happened. You were having fun.

Lost in the music, you found a strong grip around your waist, pulling you closer to their tall and muscular body, and you flipped your hair to one side of your neck, peeking over your bare shoulder to meet deep brown eyes staring back at you and a cocky smiled playing on his lips. It was Michael. Castiel’s big brother, Michael. The same Michael that Dean despised.

Oh… if only Dean could see you now. You’d rub it in his face just to spite him.

Jo and the other girls shared a look at each other, smiling in approval of the surprise guest. With a chorus of giggles, the girls wiggled elsewhere on the dance floor to give you and Michael some privacy. They knew if Cass or Dean was here to see this, they’d flip their lid! But they weren’t. And an attractive man is an attractive man. Why not have a little fun?

You were grinding up against him, your confidence back at it’s peak. You didn’t need Dean, you didn’t need to settle for Ketch, no – you could be single and have fun with no restraints.

Swaying your hips against Michael’s crotch, you slithered down before bending over and sliding your ass over his hardening length. That’s the moment you knew you were in control. You had the power. Then suddenly his hands were quick to pull you upright, one hand locked in your hair while the other pressed on your stomach, keeping you flush against him, allowing him to squirm his hips against your ass, letting you feel just how hard he was for you.

Fuck.

You shivered in his grasp, and Michael smirked. “I’m always in control,” he growled in your ear. His voice more intoxicating that the alcohol you consumed.

“Fuck,” you gasped. You had never met someone like him before. You’ve only seen him from afar, heard stories about his reputation, but this was the first time you’ve ever come face to face. This was your first time ever interacting with him, and shit. The rumors did no justice.

“Mmm,” he hummed, “If that’s what you really want.”

Before anything could escalate, someone interrupted. “Mind if I cut in?” a familiar accent filtered through your ears.

“Can’t you see we’re busy?” Michael hissed.

“K-ketch?” you questioned, pulling yourself out of Michael’s grasp. “What are you doing here?”

“Stopped by for a drink when I saw you dancing with him,” Ketch squared up against Michael. This was the first time you’ve ever seen this side of Ketch before. Was he drunk? What the hell was up with him? Was he seriously acting jealous right now?

“Sorry, is she your girlfriend? Maybe next time you should keep her on a tighter leash,” Michael chuckled.

Your jaw dropped at his words. You were offended. “Excuse you,” you stormed back in front of the cocky bastard. “I am nobody’s girlfriend, and you are a sexist asshole!”

“Feisty. I like my woman feisty. Bet you’ve got a filthy mouth in bed –” His words were cut short when threw him a right hook.

“Jump off a cliff, asshat” you spat before storming off, Ketch giving Michael a smug look before following you out of the club.

“Wow, that was impressive,” Ketch chuckled, swaying a bit on his feet.

“What the hell do you think you’re doing?” You barked. Ketch stared at you wide-eyed, not expecting you to lash out like that.

“What do you mean?” He asked flatly.

“Coming over like some jealous boyfriend! News flash, you’re not my boyfriend!”

“Sorry. I’m not sure what came over me. One minute I see you dancing with so random guy, and the next I’m walking over and the words just come out.”

“Look, Ketch. We’re friends. That’s it,” you sighed. After the few weeks, you’ve realized you didn’t like Ketch in any romantic form. You didn’t have a crush on him. You only liked the comfort he gave you. But now you had your other friends to help, and they were also getting you back on your feet. You had an actual support system and you were beginning to think for rationally rather than emotionally.

“I thought we had something?”

“Ketch… maybe we did, maybe we didn’t. We’ll always be friends but I don’t like you like that. I’m sorry.” Your words seemed a little harsh, but that’s what happens when you’re a slightly drunk. The filter comes off. “I think what I liked about you was the attention and comfort you were giving me during a vulnerable time, but I’m starting to feel like myself again. I mean, we’re still friends. Maybe we can hang out tomorrow or something?”

Ketch just stood there, eyes boring down on you. “Are you kidding me? Are you seriously turning me down right now?” He asked offended. “I spent weeks trying to help you and this is how your turning me down?”

“I’m sorry, but I’m a little drunk. And you gave me no other choice. I like you. I really do, but only as a friend. But don’t worry. Look at you. You’re a handsome fellow with a dreamy accent. You’ll find yourself a woman easy!” you tried to build up his ego.

Ketch let out an exasperated sigh, pinching the bridge of his nose with his thumb and middle finger. “You are exhausting. Ever think that Dean doesn’t like you because you’re just too much to handle? That maybe he likes simpler woman, like Lisa?”

Your stomach sank. His words hurt and they were meant to.

“Wow…” you laughed defeated, “Just… wow. How would you even know if Lisa is a simple person or not?!” You retorted.

“Y/N, look… I’m sorry. I didn’t –”

“No. No, you did. You meant it. Thanks. I was having a great night and you come crashing in like a big stupid British wrecking ball! Thanks a lot. I’ll see ya around,” you dismissed him, turning on your heels. “I need a drink…” you muttered to yourself, before entering the bar.

By the end of the night, you were plastered and Bess was having a hard time getting everyone in the car. Everyone was pretty shitfaced and she didn’t know how to handle it, so she called for back up.

She called Benny to grab Jo, Castiel to get Meg, and Dean to get you. She was surprised that she was able to catch a hold of him. Bess was well aware that Dean had been distant from all of his friends. The only person who saw him the most was Benny, because Dean would bring over his little “family” over to eat all the time.

When Dean arrived, everyone was shocked. “I told you he was coming,” Bess chided at those you didn’t believe her. She gave him the benefit of the doubt, and Dean didn’t fail her.

Dean approached the group, awkwardly greeting everyone. He quickly searched around for you, knowing that he was there to bring you home. He didn’t spot you and was about to ask Bess where you were when the loud voice of a certain, tiny redhead, boomed through the parking lot.

“The idiot knight in shinin’ armor arrives!” Charlie shouted obnoxiously, her words slurred. Castiel glared at her exasperatedly, grabbing her arm and shoving her into the back seat of his car. Dean sighed, instantly knowing that they’ve definitely heard your side of the story.

“I’ll bring her home too,” Castiel nodded, before giving his best friend and apologetic stare.

“Yo, Donny! Jump in! Us blondes need ta stick together, ya feel me?!” Jo yelled at Donna, who giggled before taking large awkward steps, as if she was trying to avoid falling into lava.

“How much, exactly, did they have to drink?” Castiel questioned, all sober sets of eyes on Bess.

“Well… Y/N kind of got into a fight?” She noticed all three men twitch at her words and quickly spoke again. “Not a fight! It was more of… uhh… she punched a guy, and this other guy followed her outside, and when she came back, she ordered a round of shots, and then another, and then random guys started buying everyone shots and well, by the time Abby was dancing on the bar, that’s when I called you. You have no idea how hard it was to get them all out of there.”

“She promised us doughnuts!” Donna shouted from the back of Benny’s pick up.

“Donna, what ya doin’ back there? C’mon and get in the truck. You’re sittin’ next to Jo!” Benny left to help Donna out of the bed of the truck and into the cab. Jo giggled while Donna attempted to climb in.

“I betcha thinkin’ I need to get some climbing lessons, dontcha? Well, that’s because I do,” she joked, making Jo laugh harder.

“Hey! What ya laughing ‘bout over there!” You slurred walking out of the bar, a beer bottle in hand.

“Y/N!” Bess shrieked.

“Oh yeah! The night’s still young, bitches!” Abby walked out right after. “Hey boys, care for a drink?” She wiggled her eyebrows before slinging her arm over your shoulder.

“What’s he doin’ here!” You grumbled, wobbling as you pointing at Dean with your beer, some of it’s contents flying out of the bottle. “We didn’t invite boys! No boys allowed! They’re goss!” You yelled, throwing your bottle at Dean. Luckily, he caught it, bringing the brown bottle to his lips and chugging what was left of it. “Hey! Dude, what the fuck? That was my beer!” you chided.

“We’re going!” Dean snapped, taking three long strides and throwing you over his shoulder.

“Hey! Who do ya think ya are? I’m gonna rip your head off!” You were punching his back and butt, his arms easily pinning your legs.

“I’d like to see you try, Sweetheart.”

“Don’t call me that. Only Dean can call me that!” You voice croaked.

“I’ll see you guys later,” Dean nodded in goodbye before hauling you to his truck.

Reaching his Ford, he wrenched the door open and swiftly set you in. But as he tried to buckle your belt, you resisted.

“I don’t like you, get away!” You whined, pushing at his chest, head, shoulders, anywhere you could. “Stop! I don’t need ya. I don’t need anything from ya,” you bonked his head with your fist like a hammer.

“Would you just stop! Just for like two seconds!” Dean hissed, grabbing each of your wrists and glaring at you. His eyes quickly softened when he noticed the tears streaming down your cheeks.

“I hate you…” you muttered before snatching your hands away and buckling yourself in, although it took a few tries.

By the time Dean had climbed into the driver’s seat, you were already out cold. He let out a deep sigh, sitting in his truck, watching you. If things were different, if Lisa hadn’t come back into his life, if Ben didn’t exist (or at least wasn’t his), he was sure he’d make sure that you were his and he was yours. You wouldn’t be out at the bar with the girls. Instead, he would have taken you out on a date, and you’d be wearing that little black dress to dinner. You would both have dessert, and then he’d end the night by taking you home and showing you how much he cared about you, prove to you how much he was in love with you. Make you believe that there was only you.

That it is only you.

As he parked in his usual parking space outside your apartment, he hopped out of the truck, and carefully opened the passenger door that you were leaning on. He held you steady as he widened the door, hooking his arms under your back and knees. As if you were light as a feather, he easily picked you up, using his hip to shut the door, before quickly locking it with his beat up key fob and shoving it into his back pocket.

It was late so no one was walking around the building halls, which Dean was a little thankful for. It saved him the trouble of explaining to anyone, and all he wanted to was to get you in bed safe and sound.

When he arrived at your front door, he raised his foot against the wall, using it as leverage so he could rest some of your weight on his leg while he dug for his spare key. He was able to easily get the key in the slot and twisted the door open, kicking the door closed with his foot until he heard the click of the lock fall into place.

He brought you over to your room, laying you in the middle of your unmade bed before removing your strappy heals. He cursed quietly to himself about how girls shouldn’t wear straps. That were so difficult to undo. When he eventually got it off, you were sitting up on the bed without him noticing.

“Oh, shit!” Dean whisper-yelled when he realized you were awake, intensely watching him. He was about to say something but you beat him to it.

“Stay—” your voice sounded small.

“What?” He asked, unsure if he heard correctly.

“Please stay. Don’t leave. Don’t leave again.”

“Sweetheart, I don’t think that’s a good idea—”

“Please! Please Dean, stay. Just for one night. All I want to do is sleep… so please.”

“Y/N—”

“Stay…” you whispered. And that was all it took.

“Okay.”

Say Something Nice Here!

Falling for the Holidays Tags: @hannahindie @pinknerdpanda @winchesterprincessbride @amanda-teaches @dancingalone21 @a-winchester-fairytale @dolphincliffs @oneshoeshort @brewsthespirit-blog @jerkbitchidjitassbutt @atc74 @natasha-baggins @heavymetalhauswife @linki-locks11 @spnwoman @veevm @chameleah86 @kdcollinsauthor @claitynroberts @roonyxx @rainflowermoon @ladylaylo @closetspngirl @mirandaaustin93 @salt-n-burn-em-all @flamencodiva @fangirlanotherjust @winchest09 @shamelesslydean @couldabeenamermaid @alexwinchester23 @algud @gracefultrenchcoat494 @prettyinplaid94 @shhhs3cret @cookiechipdough @justkending @adoptdontshoppets @screechingartisancashbailiff

#falling for the holidays #dean winchester x reader #dean x reader #dean winchester series #dean winchester #reader insert #au #au series #dean winchester au series #squirrel-moose-winchester

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lololova · 6 years ago

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“Castle, what are you doing? I was really comfortable on that couch,” Kate Beckett questioned as her husband kept pulling her with him towards the porch of their beach house.

Kate Beckett and Richard Castle had been married for no more than a couple of years and between the murders they tended to take small vacations during longer weekends to the beach house he’d purchased long before they met. The Hamptons house had been a lot bigger than Kate had anticipated the first time she’d been there but now she felt it would be absolutely perfect for when they had little ones living with them. Speaking of that first time she was there, they’d been unfortunate to get a murder quite literally stumbling into their pool which had ended with the two of them getting involved with the case. Fortunately they hadn’t had that bad of a luck the next times they’d vacationed at the beach. That second time they went there Castle had made sure to make up for the time they’d lost that first time. Gosh, those hands had done wonderful things to her. And his food along with the activities in the pool, mmmm. The most amazing part must’ve been...

“I know, but I want to show you something,” her husband interrupted her thoughts and took her back to the now.

She chuckled, “Haven’t you already shown me everything?”

“Not this,” he defended with a smirk glancing back to her and she rolled her eyes.

He loved surprising her, she’d noticed, and even though she’d never liked surprises she found herself loving his. Well, not at first, she hated the secrecy, but once the surprise was over she absolutely fell in love with it. Most of the times, anyway.

As they got out on the porch Kate felt the warm summer air shower her body, her summer dress allowing the air to reach her skin in a way her work-clothes never did. The grass under her bare feet was soothing and soft. She was surprised it was so warm, had expected it to be cold considering it was quite dark outside and the time must’ve been closer to midnight than not. When they started to reach the middle of the grass between the house and the beach she saw something catching her eyes within seconds. In the grass stood carefully placed lit candles a little here and there in what she presumed was a big candle-shaped heart. It was big enough for them to step inside and when they did Castle picked up his phone from his pocket only to surprise her even more when music started playing in the air.

“May I have this moonlight dance?” he asked, reaching out his hand towards her in invitation and she felt herself swoon over the love she felt for him.

“You may,” she said with a wide smile spreading on her lips and offered him her hand.

Castle pulled her into his arms and held her hand while the other snaked around her in order to land gently on the lower of her back while Kate put her free hand on his shoulder. They swayed to the music, their bodies close together as they gazed into each other’s eyes. Kate was drowning in his ocean blues like she’d done a million times before and she could almost swear he did the same. The light of the moon made his eyes even more magical, the shadows in his face made him only more mystical. He was beautiful, handsome. The grass tickled their bare feet but none of them cared, actually Kate only found it more romantic. Castle pushed her out a little in order to turn her around, her back against his chest as they kept swaying, his arms in a secure hug around her, and she felt his lips in her hair. They swayed in that position for a few minutes before he twirled her back to their original position and she couldn’t not stand on her toes to catch his lips with hers. The kiss was smooth, gentle, and she hoped he could feel every ounce of love she put into it, just like she could feel his. They pulled back before air became a necessity, both smiling wide.

“God, I love you Kate,” he breathed out and she bit her lip, looking down only to gaze up at him through her lashes.

“I love you too Rick.”

They danced some more in the moonlight, and when they got tired they simply laid down in the middle of the candle shaped heart, Kate’s head resting on his chest and their hands clasped together on his stomach. Castle’s free hand was fiddling with her long hair and she found herself drifting off from the pleasure along with the safety of being in his arms.

“Are you awake?” His whisper was barely loud enough for her to catch it but thankfully she wasn’t completely asleep yet.

“Mhmm,” she hummed, her eyes blinking to stay awake long enough to hear what he wanted to talk about.

“I was thinking,” he started and she turned her head in order to look up at him.

He was gazing up towards the stars and the moon but she could still see the wonder in his eyes and the small wrinkle he usually had when he thought about telling her something important.

“When we have kids,” she bit her lower lip at the when, not if, “do you think I should add kids to Nikki and Jameson or would that be too personal?”

His question had her chuckling and he glanced down at her with a quirk to his eyebrow.

“Since when do you worry about Nikki Heat getting too personal?” she asked and he scrunched his nose.

“Point taken.”

She thought about it though, having their alter egos joining them in the parenting process. Thought about how that would turn out in crime books. She became sceptical. “I don’t know to be honest. I mean, I have no problem with them taking another step but I’m not so sure it would fit into their genre. They’re crime books,” she said with all honesty.

He nodded. “I see what you mean.”

“Though,” she added in a light tone. “If you think you can make it work I’d say go for it.”

His gaze softened and she smiled, her heart skipping a beat due to the love she could see in his blues. And she couldn’t wait to tell him.

“You know, maybe you’ll have to rewrite the ending on the next one,” she said and his forehead wrinkled in confusion.

“What do you mean? I just finished it and you said you liked it, why would I change?”

She just loved how clueless he was, loved how it would all come as a big surprise for him. She’d planned on telling him later that week, when it was their anniversary, but now she couldn’t imagine telling it another way.

“Maybe Nikki Heat should already be pregnant in that ending,” she said and he got even more confused as she couldn’t help herself from letting go of a chuckle. She couldn’t stop smiling, her teeth grinning wide.

That’s when she could see the puzzle bits fall into place because he got this shocked look with wide eyes as he opened his mouth in a small o.

“You mean...?” he said, just barely louder than a whisper. “Are you…?”

Sticking out her tongue she wasn’t able to contain her happiness. Her whole soul glowing with the wonderful news. With a nod in place it didn’t take more than a couple seconds before he was pulling her up and claiming her lips with a joyous yelp. She laughed in the kiss as he pushed her onto her back only to follow, placing himself above her with his body close to hers. When his tongue seeked entrance, and got it, her laugh disappeared and got replaced by a moan. She let her hands start to wander, let them go around his body in order to pull him closer and started demanding more with her own mouth. He made a sound, a mix between a chuckle and a groan, and slowed down the kiss in order to pull away, their eyes getting stuck in each other’s.

“So, we’re having a baby,” he stated in a low voice, his lips pulled up in a wide smile.

“Yeah,” she whispered. “We’re having a baby.” The confirmation had his lips pulling up impossibly wider and she mirrored his expression.

They were having a baby. A baby. I can’t wait.

THE END

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kyndaris · 6 years ago

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Living the Lie

This is a short story I uploaded first to my Fictionpress. Maybe one of these days, I should really take a mental health day from work. Or find some gosh darn direction in my life. But, if I did...would I be as inspired to write? Ah, the bane of being a creator.

Throughout my life, I’ve always watched as others raced ahead. It hasn’t been easy. Keeping my head above the surface of the ocean known as life. Every moment, I fear a wave crashing down on me, or when my strength fails and I stop treading water. Worst of all is when you see people posting up their picture-perfect lives and outstanding achievements on social media when you’re all but drowning in a dead-end job that had nothing to do with your degree or the hopes you fostered as a young child.

No one needs to reminded of their failures. So, please take your bullshit and spam it on someone else’s wall. And don’t, for the love of God, downplay it in your bid for the most likes! I can tell when someone’s fishing for compliments and I won’t abide by it.

You might be wondering where all this vitriol stems from. The answer is simple. It comes from a deep well of antipathy and frustration. Of being listless and rudderless. Of having no aspirations when you graduated high school at the top of your class and watched as all your dreams were dashed against the rocks of reality before they even had the chance to bloom.

No. This is no fairy tale full of happy ever afters. This is reality. This is truth. Where those with direction and purpose are able to find fulfilment while their silent and unsuccessful counterparts fall prey to their insecurities or keep it tightly tucked away under lock and key. And then suffer the repercussions with sleepless nights before they turn towards drink or prescription drugs to ease their suffering.

It was not always like this, you know.

I remember a childhood filled with dreams. Of jumping between obsessions as if they were Halloween costumes. One day, I fancied myself an esteemed surgeon of some repute. Another would see me shredding tunes on my plastic guitar.

None of that was enough to prepare my young self for the despair and doubt and fear involved with surviving in a world that does not have your back. And which is always eagerly anticipating your fall into destitution.

Because the fact of the matter is: no one cares. No one ever will. You’re just another number falling through the cracks of welfare. A bottom-feeder trying to wring what’s left from the upstanding, proper tax-paying civilians.

Over the years, in order to survive this cruel world, I’ve clung to whatever job that came my way. Lived pay cheque to pay cheque. Constantly concerned with what the future held and green with envy with the respectable lives of my friends.

It was enough for anyone to contemplate the unthinkable.

The entire world owed me. And if I wanted to live in this world of unfamiliar faces and sacks of meat with their wallets full to bursting, I would need to take everything that I wanted, consequences be damned!

The job I had in mind was simple in concept. It was the execution that turned out to be my downfall, as you’ll soon learn.

At the time, I thought my plan was full-proof. I would use others just like me. The downtrodden. The world weary. But even the most meticulous and well-laid ideas can fall through.

Much as it did in this instance, considering that I’m penning this even as I await my final verdict at court. But neither the judge nor the jury will delay me from my magnum opus. This will be my final piece of work before oblivion greets me after the next few hours. The weight on my shoulders is unbearable but press on, I must.

It started off as innocuous as could be. I was the perfect friend, eager to help. And so, when my friends were putting down for mortgages and then taking expensive holidays overseas, they would invite me to house-sit. It was a simple task and some of them even bothered to bequeath me with gifts for taking some time out of my week to look after their precious belongings.

Slowly and surely, though I am loath to admit it, I became greedy. Seeing all the things that they had but I did not, sparked something in me. They did not know it, but I would squirrel away trinkets that I knew would not be missed. Maybe a Rolex here, or a few hundred dollars that they had hidden underneath the mattress. It was so easy and simple. And none of them the wiser.

But as the years dragged on, I found myself grow ever more listless. What was the whole point of living? Everything was all so routine. Nothing could surprise me. And with that came the dread of waking up every morning, knowing that life was meaningless.

There was some trouble at work.

To numb myself from it all, I started drinking. First, it would be a bottle of beer with my co-workers every Friday night. Then, it would be two shots of whiskey every night. I knew that I had a problem when I was chugging down three cans of piss-poor beer just so that I could function for the day ahead.

It came as no surprise when the severance package came. I took it, hoping it would be enough to pay my overdue bills as well as indulge in my alcoholism.

Gradually, though, I realised that trying to drown my doubts solved nothing. The peace I sought was a lie. If I wanted to make something of myself, I had to act.

Two years it took me. Until I finally landed an enviable sales position at one of the leading security firms in the entire city. Though I had my fair share of problems, it was my fair share of connections and skilful networking that ultimately won me the part. Having landed the job I so highly sought, I began the second part of my plan – unable to be satisfied with the paltry salary that I was expected to live off.

While I had suffered a few casualties among my side-job of house-sitting, in my extensive friendship circles, I was still a trusted and respected member of society. It was no difficult thing to convince them that I had shed my old ways and had devoted myself to keeping their belongings safe from undesirables – and at a discount that they could hardly say ‘no’ to.

Slowly but surely, I built up a most trusted portfolio and sent off bits and pieces of information to my accomplices. With the job already cased and the codes to the alarms provided, it was a simple affair of waiting for the right opportunity to strike.

The first few jobs were a resounding success. Thousands upon thousands began pouring into bank accounts before being evenly distributed through private transactions.

But it all slowly came apart when the others became greedy.

I remember one incident at the office. It was late and I had stayed back to fix up some paperwork. Even though I had almost a million dollars tied up in investments, I could not draw attention to the vast amounts of wealth I now had. It had to be used sparingly. A little here, a little there – if I wanted to keep the tax agents off my trail.

His name was Doug. A stupid fellow, really. More of a hired muscle than someone I would have deigned to initiate cerebral conversations with. In he barged into one of my most innermost sanctums, caring not that at any moment he could have disrupted our tenuous business network – demanding more. Always more.

More, more, more, more, more.

You can imagine how maddening it was for someone of my intellect having to rely on such individuals for my masterplan to work. And yet, rely on them I must for it would not be detrimental to everything that I planned if I was seen in the midst of a crime scene.

Still, Doug had made his point clear and I strived to find more lucrative targets. Who was I to deprive my employees of a bonus or a raise? Not if it meant that I was beaten to almost an inch of my life. Besides, more money for Doug also meant more money for me.

For two months, we managed to rake in far more than the quotas that I had set. I will admit, the success we had found had made me giddy. I wanted to keep pushing the boundaries – take on more risks, for the reward when we had overcome all obstacles was a high that I never wanted to come down from. The rush, the thrill…

And that was the fatal mistake I made.

Instead of being satisfied with what we had managed to do and laying low for a time, I was eager to do something much bigger. I allowed my base greed take control and dictate my actions rather than heeding caution, even when my security business was hit by an audit and was under much tighter scrutiny than it had ever been.

Yet the thrill of it! Oh, I could wax poetic about how invigorated I was during the last several months as I played the elusive mouse. To steal a quote from the deplorable detective known only as Sherlock Holmes, the game was very much afoot. And I was eager to win it.

To show everyone I was more than the dowdy middle-aged man with a growing bald spot.

Alas, you know how the story ends. I won’t trouble you with the details that were splashed across the newspapers for weeks on end. What I will reveal is that in those days leading up to my arrest, the betrayal struck a deep blow to my confidence. I knew it had been foolish but I had thought that over our long acquaintance, I would have been able to trust Charlie.

The gun feels heavy in my hand. I bought it soon after my encounter with Doug at my office. A means of self-defence should something similar happen again.

I kept it strapped to the underside of my desk. An insurance policy for dealing with my less than savoury associates. One could never be too careful and I had learned that the hard way.

They say that to take one’s own life is an act of cowardice. But as a I stare at this carefully constructed piece of metal, I cannot help but think that the old adage is a lie. Perhaps it is my pride but there is something beautiful about going out on my own terms instead of wallowing inside a prison cell.

What is important to leave behind is not my wasted body but instead my legacy. To have others know that they are not alone in their fight against this oppression of the mind and soul. I could have been a successful businessman had the fates looked kindly on me. I could have lived my life with a smile on my face, spread out on a beach towel on Venice Beach. I could have been the one that had both a wife and loving son.

All of it could have been mine. Had not others stolen the happiness I could have achieved!

It is nearly seven. By eight thirty, I will be bundled into a police vehicle and escorted back to court. I know that any form of resistance would be futile.

But I am so tired…

Tired of what this world aspires to be. Tired of the expectations placed upon all the young boys and girls as they are constantly reminded that they are special. That they have purpose and meaning. Only for them to find out several months before graduation that they will only be a very small cog in a very large machine.

To the first responders that will find this: I apologise for the mess. In the end, it was not as easy as I had hoped. I dithered on the cusp right until I saw the first flashes of red and blue.

To those that were hoping to recoup their losses: again, I apologise. Perhaps you will be able to sell some of my assets (little though they may be).

And finally, to the jurors. I will not hear how you have judged me. Or my actions.

Still, let it be known that I, being of sound mind and body, do enter in my final testimonial. To shed some truth on the world and cut away the lies we weave around ourselves.

I may not be a good man. But I am my own man. How many of you can say the same?

#short story

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pinksausageduo · 7 years ago

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ong seongwoo|bad boy

member: ong seongwoo genre: fluff summary: college au! badboy au! a reformed bad girl and the resident bad boy, she’s hard to get but he loves a challenge. will it end in disaster or love? collab: with iris!! @alliwannado-w1

seongwoo was bad and everyone knew it

he was in a top secret gang and had very dangerous friends

but that didn’t mean he wasn’t popular quite the opposite actually

he had heaps of friends and he was the one people usually went to for “party favours” but it was never talked about people just knew

though seongwoo himself was definitely talked about on every corner of campus

and he knew it

the girls loved him

and he knew that too

he might not wear a leather jacket because it’s too “cliche”

even if he does wear one occasionally

you can tell instantly he’s a bad boy

from the ripped jeans, worn converse, a tight white t shirt showing off his toned and defined muscles, his messy black hair, the way he holds himself and his attitude

but most of all the cocky smirk he has plastered on his face

he never hung around campus, barely attended lectures but still got really good grades?? but he visited the occasional party

where girls would throw themselves at him for one night with the resident bad boy

truthfully it was pathetic but you didn’t really care that much either

you were in your first year of college and it wasn’t bad

mostly it was better than high school

but in high school you were a completely different person

right now you’re just another everyday normal college student

in high school you were known as the school’s bad girl, you were in a gang and mixed up with “bad people”

but to you they were like family

and you ended up leaving your gang

because it started to getting really dangerous because one of your members upset one of the most dangerous gangs around leader

more and more people were going to hospital because of the feud between the two gangs and they wanted you to leave

in all honesty you didn’t want to but you ended up leaving

two years later you’ve still not been able to contact them, you miss them a lot but you’re moving on with your life

but then ong seongwoo comes into your life like a bloody hurricane and basically steals your heart

you two met at a party

the dance floor was packed and you were right in the middle of it having fun

and then suddenly someone grabs your hand, spins you around and brings you close to them

you instantly thought to kick them but then you meet those gorgeous enticing brown eyes

and your heart stops for a moment and you’re breathless

you felt a rush of love?

but you pushed your feelings straight down thinking it’s just the alcohol talking

then you realise it’s ong seongwoo

he smirks at you and whispers into your ear in a low seductive tone

“having fun?”

though you ain’t buying this crap, you were sure he did it with at least a million different other girls

and you are not the one to throw yourself at a guy with one sentence

“i was when you ruined it” you said coldly taking back your hand

he looks at you with a mix of surprise and shock

you give him a smirk as you say

“try another girl ong seongwoo and maybe they’ll fall for your bad boy charm” you rolled your eyes as your voice was dripping in sarcasm

seongwoo was so surprised since no girl has ever rejected him

well except in primary school when he pulled her pigtails while asking her out but that doesn’t count

though seongwoo always loved a challenge and you were exactly that

before approaching you, he was staring at you from afar and something hit him just wave of emotion

he never felt anything like it

everything about you was so beautiful, enticing and captivating

he just had to talk to you

even if he thought it was bullshit it kinda felt like love at first sight

but now his plan horribly backfired

usually if he did that move he’d already been able to steal a kiss from most girls

you were different though and he liked that

he liked that a lot

“what bad boy charm?” seongwoo “innocently” said back

“oh gosh please stop you know exactly what i’m talking about” you say amused by his antics

‘okay maybe i do” he says with a cheeky smile before continuing

“but how do you know it won’t work you?” he says with a heart melting look

and that’s exactly how your heart felt

he was good and he knew it

but you still couldn’t fall for him well at least not on the first night

and strengthened your resolve

“because i don’t date bad boys” you say with a raise of an eyebrow

“oooo do we have a good little girl here” he teases

you scoff at that statement nearly laughing

“trust me even if i wanted to be i couldn’t” you say some longing in your voice thinking about your gang

seongwoo looks at you curiously before you snap out of your thoughts

you lean and whisper into his ear

“night seongwoo, have fun and try not to think of me when you’re kissing another girl”

you smirk at him and walk away without a second glance

while seongwoo can’t help but grin even if he was rejected

he knew right then and there he was gonna fall for you big time

and even he tried to he couldn’t stop thinking about you

the next day seongwoo greeted you the moment you were out of your dorm

“hey” he says with a charming smile leaning on the back of the wall literally looking like he was filming a commercial but it was all EFFORTLESS

at least that’s what you thought and didn’t know he spent one and a half hours on his hair making sure every strand was in place

“it’s 7 in the morning seongwoo and i have to get to a stupid lecture what do you want?” you say tiredly

“i didn’t get your name last night” he says stepping closer to you

“that’s because i didn’t want you to know it” you retort sassily

then you grabbed his coffee cup and took a sip

“HEY! THAT’S MINE!!” seongwoo whines

“nope it’s mine now see you later pretty boy” you say turning around to leave

“oh come on at least let me get your name” he says

“you know where my dorm is but not my name, i’m not stupid seongwoo” you say sassily before walking off

“i’m picking you up after class” he shouts as you get further than away from him

“STALKER” you teasingly shout

seongwoo sighs as he sees you walk away but he can’t help but smile

you were definitely a piece of work but in his eyes you were a masterpiece

your quick comebacks and teasing made him feel things he’s never felt before

you were gorgeous, witty, smart, confident, funny and independent

how could he not fall for you but he need you to fall for him

seongwoo was going to win your heart

but unbeknownst to him you were waiting for him too

something attracted you to seongwoo and it wasn’t his bad boy charm as you so eloquently put it

but it was what was hidden beneath, the small signs of care when he was around you

that coffee was warm and not a single sip was taken from it and you knew he was going to give it to you, it was also your favourite drink

the fact he actually put effort into finding out where your dorm is

and how he didn’t knock on the door but waited for you

that was just the interaction tis morning

you couldn’t help feel all fuzzy and warm thinking about him

you didn’t admit it to yourself but you couldn’t spend any bit of your lecture concentrating and thinking about a certain someone

a whole month went by and you could 100% say you were falling for seongwoo

and him? well the whole school knew he was infatuated with you

for the first time in his whole college career he went to the library

just because you wanted to study

and spent more time on campus those for two weeks than 5 months

he always made sure to give you space to live your boring ass life

but would always meet you when you finish up your last class of the day

and of course bring you coffee in the morning

you spent a lot of time at your dorm, eating, talking, studying, watching netflix and just spending time with each other

the witty comebacks and flirty teasing was a constant

but you two had a lot of real conversations

about life, your future, the problems, insecurities, worries, fears and all the happy memories you had too

though neither of you mentioned gangs at all

seongwoo not ready to share that bit of his life because he was so scared that you’ll be running fro the hills the moment you hear about it

and you did not want to visit the past

it was genuinely amazing

seongwoo wanted to ask you out the only thing stopping him is how you would react about all the details of the gang

though you guys were already like a couple

while you watch netflix you two cuddle all snuggled up

occasionally you two hold hands too

he’s even sneaked in a few cheek kisses here and there

the first time he did it he remembered you shouting at him and chasing after him as he laughed

but you loved it

then seongwoo suddenly disappeared

you instantly knew something was a miss when he wasn’t there in the morning then no contact whatsoever for the whole day

then after you left him several calls and texts

and he didn’t reply and the calls went straight to voice mail

you were worried out of your mind

all you wanted to know that he was safe

after a whole week passed, you went to his dorm

it was locked and you instantly unlocked it by using your skeleton key

everything was like what you imagine a guy’s college dorm to be

but when you searched the bedroom something caught your eye

it was the symbol of your gang, a pagan symbol for protection

on a letter which was written with a code that your gang produced

you still remember it by heart

it only gave you an address and a change of password

there was anticipation and excitement rushing though your veins

maybe seongwoo was there

you were instantly shocked that you didn’t think of your old gang members first but seongwoo

and clutching the letter you realise in such a short span of time you really have fallen for him

but you were also so excited to meet your members again

you went straight back to your dorm and brought out your box

which had your old outfit you always wore to headquarters

black high waisted cuffed shorts, chunky black heeled boots, a plain black singlet, your old worn leather jacket and your red bandana

you quickly put your hair up into a high pony and wore the outfit, before putting some red lipstick on

also making sure you were armed with knives just in case

you left and when you arrived at the location which was a plain steel wall with the symbol painted onto it

but there was three small knobs and you twisted them according to the instructions

the door swung open and you were welcome to a dark bar

“who the hell are you” demanded a low voice as a gun was pointed right into your temple

you looked at the guy with no fear in your eyes

“wait woojin stop, i can recognise that outfit from a mile away. i got her that leather jacket and she loves that red bandana.” said a very familiar voice

as the guy called woojin lowered his gun you could see daniel’s face

and you broke out into a bright smile as he did the same

“welcome home y/n” he says happily

as you run into his arms and he spins you around laughing

“where’s everyone else? is everyone safe? why did you stop all contact with me for three years?!!!” you demand

he chuckles and says “that’s the y/n i know, and most of us are out, more people got hurt but it all sorted itself out, and by the time it was safe we didn’t know how to contact you”

“you still should have” you grumpily say before you hear you name called out

a brown haired teenager came barrelling into you and you reprimanded daniel instantly

“JINYOUNG IS UNDERAGE WHY IS HE HERE??”

‘we have even younger members” quipped in woojin

and you look at daniel ready to rip his head off while he takes a step back

“but you were in the gang when you were underaged plus i only do the motorcycle races and the underground fights” jinyoung answered still hugging you

“you rascal i missed you so much you better be safe during the races and fights” you reprimand sweetly

“i will i will, you still see me as that 8 year old kid you used to baby sit don;t you” he says with a cute pout

“yuppp you’ll always be my lil bro” you agree with a soft smile

“hey y/n sorry about the whole gun thing” says woojin shyly

“oh don’t worry about it, it’s protocol i know” you say nicely

“thanks for understanding” he says smiling showing off his snaggletooth

and you can’t help but smile back

“wait daniel the reason why i came here was because of ong seongwoo do you know him?” you asked daniel seriously

“does he know him of course he does they’re best friends” interrupted a new voice

you look up to see minhyun

“minhyun!!” you say brightly going over to him to hug him

“it’s so nice to see you again” he says genuinely

“are you still the resident healer?” you ask

“of course none of these idiots would be alive without me” he says jokingly

“very true” you agree nodding while the other guys started protesting

“but where’s seongwoo he completely disappeared on me without a single word, and i found this letter in his dorm” you said handing the letter over to minhyun

“wait wait how do you know seongwoo?” daniel asks bewildered

“OHHHHH I GET IT!!” jinyoung says loudly

as the realisation dawns on woojin the same time

woojin loudly announced “y/n’s THE GIRL”

“the one he talks about constantly, refuses to give her name to us, who’s basically the love of his life and the one he complains that he’s gonna lose if he tells about all of us??” minhyun asks

while your mouth kept on dropping at his words while you yourself were melting at his words

“YES THIS IS AMAZING I CALL BEING THE BEST MAN AND GODFATHER TO THE FIRST BORN!!” daniel shouts in excitement

you shake your head not understanding how this the same guy to be able to beat up 3 guys ruthlessly all at once and go 180km an hour with no hesitation in a street race

“guys for fucks sake i just want to know where he is that’s more important than an IMAGINARY wedding and future child” you say dryly

“we’ll make that a reality one day won’t we?” you hear seongwoo’s voice oozing with cheekiness and happiness

and you can’t help but burst into a huge relieved grin

you rush to hug him but you gently wrap your arms around him just in case he has any injuries

“you absolute idiotic moron you scared the shit out of me” you whisper softly as seongwoo’s wraps his arms around you gently

you instantly feel safe and like it was home in his arms

“aww you care about me” he cooes teasingly

“oh shut up” you mutter breaking apart slightly disappointed

“seongwoo why the hell are you out of bed you woke up from your concussion literally an hour ago and you have TWO BULLET WOUNDS” minhyun stressed urgently

before seongwoo could reply woojin gently swept him up and led him to the infirmary and put him on his bed

“i’m sorry okay!! i just wanted to see y/n” he says totally not sorry

“he’s so whipped” jinyoung comments with a smirk

seongwoo flipped him off for that but never denied it

“why didn’t you tell me that you were going??” you asked impatiently

“um because i thought it would be a quick job but ha yeah i got beat real bad” seongwoo mumbles embarrassed

“i literally broke into your apartment and found the letter, you really need to keep this stuff hidden” you say telling him off

“wow you were really worried weren’t you” seongwoo says happily totally ignoring the comment about his incompetence

before you can answer he adds “guys can you give us moment”

“OOOOOOOO don’t be making out when we’re back!” daniel teases

you flip him the finger as he leaves with everyone else

“seongwo-” you start before seongwoo interrupts you

“y/n just let me say this first” he begs which makes you agree instantly

“okay i’ve been meaning to say this for a while. gosh y/n i’m in love with you, i never believed the bullshit love at first sight thing but that’s exactly how it felt when i first met you at that party. over the course of month i fell for you and the only reason why i didn’t tell you about all this is because i thought you would leave me, now i see that really is not the case.” he says slightly nervous but mostly hopeful

“i wanted to ask you will you be my girlfriend?” he ended hesitantly not meeting your eyes

your heart felt like it was going to burst in happiness and love

“of course i will, i love you too seongwoo” you say your voice filled with affection

then seongwoo gives you his signature smirk/smile making you instantly melt

and brings you close with two fingers leading your chin towards his lips

you guys finally kiss after a whole month of flirting back and forth

seongwoo smiles as he kisses you gently at first then deepening it

you run your hands through his messy black hair making sure not to hurt any of his injuries

his arms wrap around your waist while kissing you with even more love and affection that before

the kiss was light flirty but passionate and full of love

just like your relationship with seongwoo

and you broke apart gently still noses touching

with sweet smiles and seongwoo whispered to you sounding very full of himself

“you totally do fall for bad boys”

you shake your head laughing before saying

“nah i just fell for you...” you stopped a moment before continuing because of seongwoo

he can’t help but smile at you making you want to kiss him all over again

and you ended up doing just that

which the guys totally interrupted on

but not before you said

“my bad boy”

this wasn’t anything like i planned it to be but oh well. i planned this collab with iris for ages but won’t be doing all the members. just the ones we feel that is most like a “bad boy” i hope you guys like it!!

as always please leave an anon or a message about anything love you all!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JEN!!! @kpopsincejune07 i hope this wrecks you to core and that you like it! i hope you have an amazing day work free and with friends and family. thank you so much for always being one of my biggest fans and i’m so glad we started talking. i love you heaps!!

#wanna one #wanna one scenarios #wanna one imagines #ong seongwoo #ong seongwoo scenarios #ong seongwoo imagines #ong #seongwoo #ong seongwu #ong seongwu scenarios #ong seongwu imagines #wanna one fluff #wanna one bad boy #kang daniel #hwang minhyun #bae jinyoung #park woojin

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envision-fandom · 7 years ago

Text

Christmas Suprise

Thomas Sangster Fanfiction

Couple: Reader x Thomas

Rating: Cute/fluff

You have been dating Thomas for a while now and you had both just taken another step in your relationship when he had asked you to move in with him. You had never felt happier and with Christmas right around the corner you were ecstatic that you would be spending it with the one you love. Christmas was your favourite holiday and you had already prepared everything from decorations to food and even a perfect gift you were sure Thomas would love. As you were decorating the tree you hear the front door being unlocked, signalling that Thomas was home from work "Baby i'm home, where are you?"

"I'm in here!" you call back.

"Wow you've really made our apartment look festive, I can't believe you were able to do this all by yourself! Sorry I wasn't able to be around to help."

"It's okay Tommy I know how stressful work is and I love Christmas so it's no bother" He comes up behind you and wraps his arms around your waist.

"You're the best girlfriend anyone could ever ask for" he says as he nuzzles his face into your neck "So what does my gorgeous girlfriend want for Christmas this year?"

You had no reason to think over Thomas's question, as you already knew exactly what you wanted. You turned to face him and smiled at his adorable face "All I want for Christmas is you!"

He chuckles at your request "But baby you've already got me"

You smile back at him, snuggling into his chest "I know! Then I don't need anything because everything I've ever wanted is right here in front of me" You look back up into his eyes and he pulls you into a tender kiss and you knew in your heart this is the happiest you have ever felt.

Time skip- Christmas eve.

You had been preparing most of the Christmas dinner, to be sure it was ready for the next day, making it easier to cook. You had moved all of your presents under the tree and had just gotten out of the shower and into your new comfy Christmas pyjamas ready for a night of cuddles and watching films with Thomas. You sat on the sofa, flicking through the Christmas films on Netflix waiting for Thomas to come home from work. He was a little late, but you didn't mind as you knew how stressful his job was and being a famous actor wasn't easy. You settled on watching Love Actually, it had always been your favourite Christmas film and you loved admiring Thomas and how cute he was as a child. You got to thinking about how cute yours and Thomas's children would be, hoping that they would look a lot like him, as he was so damn adorable. Your phone started to ring, startling you and interrupting your fantasy about your future life with Thomas. It was an unknown number "Hello?"

"Hey babe, it's just me. I'm really sorry, I know I promised you that i'd be home for Christmas but work is really hectic and they won't let me leave! I'm so sorry love please don't be mad at me?"

Your mood instantly changed and your previous smile faltered "Are you sure there's no way for you to come home?" you inquired, desperate to not have to spend Christmas alone.

"Yeah love, i'm really sorry, I promise i'll make it up to you!"

You didn't want to make a scene or cause Thomas to feel guilty, so you played it off as no big deal "Okay sure, it's no problem. Don't work too hard."

"Okay baby, i'll ring you later, I've got to go. I love you, bye." He ended the call and you were left sitting there, in your apartment feeling empty and alone. Tears began streaming down your face, as the reality that you wouldn't be able to spend your favourite holiday with the one you love sunk in. You made your way upstairs and curled up under the cold covers of your vacant bed, missing the loving touch of your boyfriend.

You woke up the next day, feeling even crappier than the night before. You had overslept and it was already 1 o'clock. You decided to ring up your parents to see if you could head over to theirs earlier, seeing as you had no other plans for the day. You began to get yourself ready, wearing your new red silk underwear and red velvet dress, trying to get into the Christmas spirit, but ending up feeling even more depressed knowing you couldn't show it off to Thomas- the person you had bought it all for. You finished up your makeup and headed out the door, not bothering to glance over at the unopened presents under the tree, knowing full well that it would only worsen your mood. After several hours of drinking and celebrating with your family, you decided it was time to head home- although you weren't too pleased to go back to your vacant apartment, you didn't want to intrude on your parents plans. Each step you took towards your apartment door, caused your heart to ache, knowing that you would once again be left alone. You sighed before opening the door, not bearing to face the dark emptiness of your apartment, but you were instantly taken aback by what you saw. A full Christmas dinner was sat on the dinning table, waiting to be eaten. Candles were placed all around the apartment and a trail of rose petals led to the bedroom. You walked further into the apartment, anticipating what you had yet to see. This was the greatest surprise of all. Thomas was sat under the Christmas tree, a ribbon placed on top of his head, wearing nothing but santa boxers and fluffy socks "Merry Christmas!" he cheered.

Tears started flowing down your cheeks and Thomas's grin instantly faltered, a look of concern plastered on his face "Love what's wrong?" He made his way towards you.

"Nothing's wrong. This is perfect! But how can you be here? I thought you had work?!" You playfully hit him on the arm.

"I did, but I knew I couldn't leave you alone on Christmas, especially when I promised you that I would be your gift. He smirks at you and leads you over to the dinning room “you hungry?”

“Starving!” You grin at him, finally filled with festive cheer.

After an amazing Christmas dinner, cooked by your very talented boyfriend, you made your way over to the tree to open the presents. Thomas’s reaction to the limited edition model millennium falcon you managed to snag him was priceless. You had never seen such shock and amazement on his face before, which causes you to giggle. Just as you finished unwrapping your last gift off Thomas, you look up to hug him, thanking him for such amazing gifts but instantly stop in your tracks. You were not expecting this and you were left completely speechless and frozen in place, unaware if you were dreaming or if what you were seeing was reality.

Thomas was knelt down on one knee, a small silver box in his hand, which contained the most spectacular, breathtaking ring inside. You blinked a couple of times, to be sure this was truly happening. Thomas takes a deep breathe, before looking into your eyes, a serious expression on his face.

“Y/N, you have made me the happiest man in the world. I have nothing but amazing memories of our time together and I cherish each and every one of them. I honestly can not imagine my life without you and I hope that you feel the same. So I guess what i’m saying is... Will you do me the honor of becoming my wife?”

You take a moment to process what has just happened, still too shocked to be able to function. You realised how long you were taking to answer when Thomas shifted uncomfortably, a worried look in his eye.

You jumped on him, pushing him to the ground and straddling him, wrapping your arms around his neck “Oh my gosh Tommy of course! 1 million times Yes!!” He pulls you into a tender kiss, both of you smiling uncontrollably. You both finally pull away and he places the ring on your finger. It fit perfectly and looked even more beautiful now it was on your finger.

“Now how about we make this Christmas even more special by heading to the bedroom for your last surprise” Thomas smirks at you, a lustful glint in his eye.

“That sounds perfect, Mr.Sangster”

He picks you up bridal style and walks towards the bedroom “This way Mrs.Sangster”

You blush at the use of the name and smile in content. Christmas really was your favourite holiday season.

Note: I hope you guys liked it! I wrote this really quickly because I totally forgot I promised to do a Christmas special, so don’t hate on it too much. Once again I’d just like to say how much I appreciate all the support, i love you guys so much (you da best!) and also I just wanted to wish you all MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!! <3

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spellyjane · 7 years ago

Text

Big Island Splash, Mash, Dash!

Belated Aloha, forgive me for taking two weeks to write this!

I thought we had landed on the moon as I descended the plane stairs onto the island of black volcanic rubble. After nine plus hours of flying I had arrived at Triathlon Mecca, Kona, a little town on a wisp of land in the middle of a massive ocean, noisy with wind and hot as hades.

Hawaii is halfway between Sydney and Chicago so provided the perfect location for a rendezvous with my Dad whom I had not seen for over a year. (Aww, thanks for coming and sharing this with me Dad. ×××)

“Downtown” Kona is small and super cute but that week was COMPLETELY overrun with compression-wear trussed, trucker hat clad, slightly weather beaten, uber athletic types. I almost fit right in.

I was pleased to get up and out of the hype on my first night, having a home cooked meal with my dear friends Ben and Lillian at their B&B located on a flower farm way above Kona. Ben and Lillian are a fab couple I met running in Jersey City. I laughed off their prediction back in 2013 after my first 70.3 that I would one day race at Kona, thinking of course that will never happen because I will NEVER do an Ironman. I was beyond flattered to receive a message from these guys on my return home from IM Texas with my IMWC slot secured, telling me that they had booked their flights to Kona! Just wow.

At the suggestion of a friend I had signed up for the big charity Underpants run. Yes! Why not? It is for charity, I figured that if I had to endure running along behind ironmen in their tighty whities, well it would be worth it, for the charity of course. I wore a pair of huge granny dacks sporting a kangaroo waving an Aussie flag on the butt and dragged my poor Dad to the start line. He did not run, just observed… (that sounds way more creepy that it really was.) I met up with some friends Mike, a seasoned Kona participant and Jeff a green Kona rookie just like me.

We had a hoot, Mike and Jeff were happy to be stuck behind the Coeur Team girls, how shallow, I mean really? Post run “analysis” and breakfast at Evolution hit the spot. Oh a tip for Underpants Run rookies I gleaned from post race observation: sweaty tighty whities may leave you exposing a whole lot more than you anticipated.

Simon arrived on the Thursday. We had decided to leave the kids solo in Chicago… just kidding, our friends Alex and Theresa stepped in there. Theresa was so super cute, she called the schools to make sure the boys got there ok, drove the boys to their after school triathlon sessions and gave up their whole weekend too! What a load off our minds, we were so grateful.

I was able to squeeze in some down time. Dad, Simon and I spent Thursday afternoon sitting on the lanai of our apartment sipping a beer, watching the sun go down, taking a million photos and solving the world’s problems. I don't get to chill with my Dad too often, spending time with my Dad like that has left a warm little glow in my heart. It was one of my favorite moments of the trip. (My Dad hates being in photos, but I do manage to snag him in a few pics on this trip.)

As amiable and easy going as you all know me to be, I knew I would be prone to a little pre Ironman World Championships fretting. I did not want to expose my loved ones to my potential dragon lady side so I sent Simon and Dad off to explore Volcano National Park on the other side of the Island on Friday. A rather unwelcome visitor arrived on Friday, perhaps the best euphemism I can use is “Aunt Flo”, what a cow, she was not invited and I was not expecting to see her. She threw me in a bit of a spin, but I pulled it together and added dealing with that to my race plan.

I got my race gear together, checked my bike and checked in. What an awesome hype! I had forgotten that I had listed my occupation on the Ironman registration form as “Secret Agent.” As I walked down the red carpet to check in they called me out, “Here is Kelly Phuah, she is competing in the women’s 45-49 age group…” [pause] “she is a secret agent!” Haha, cover blown!

I was welcomed into Transition by my very own volunteer escort, Craig. Craig and his wife, from Seattle, have been coming to the big Island for the last 10 years to volunteer for IMWC!

Whaaat!? I know right? Gulp, I felt a little overwhelmed at that moment. I racked my bike, hung my transition bags. Then I stood for a few moments on the red carpet, I let myself feel special for being there before heading off to eat and find an air conditioner!

I found my friend Mike and we talked race stuff and spectator logistics tips while sipping protein shakes with our feet up. It was the perfect pre race afternoon.

Dinner that night was right down in the middle of all the action at Honu’s, overlooking the athlete area and swim start with Ben, Lillian, Dad and Simon. There was much discussion over the spectator plans and I shared my hopeful race splits to help them know where I would be at certain times. I was worried about how the day was going to be for everyone who had come all that way to watch. I knew it would be a long hot day for them too.

I had to have the Hawaiian Pizza, oh wow, caramelized pineapple and kalua shredded pork, It was awesome!

I got antsy all of a sudden in the middle of dinner when I realised that I was doing a freaking Ironman the next day. I rushed our farewells with Ben and Lillian and dragged Dad and Simon home. I have no clear memory of going to bed or how I slept, my mind just leaps to Simon and I driving down Alii Drive at 4am!

Race Day

Goal: under 11hrs.

Gosh, how much detail can you handle? Do I make it sound epic and glamorous? I guess if you are reading this then you are either a really good friend or a weird triathlon junkie so I will just give you the ugly truth.

Treading water with 600 other women waiting for the start canon was crazy. Everyone was apologetically kicking each other. I looked back at the crowd on the shore and the pier and let the swell of excitement pick me up. I sighted the 1st boat and wiggled a little closer to the front. The cannon boomed and we turned from polite and apologetic to tiger sharks. I was kicked, swam over and grabbed, I had to restart my watch 3 times because the stop button was kicked. I am quite sure I did my fair share of kicking others too, it was impossible not to. And at one stage I found myself laying completely on top of another athlete, I have no idea where she,came from!

I found my rhythm eventually and was able to start really swimming. By about half way I could feel my speedsuit cutting into my neck and throat as I was sighting and turning to breathe. It left quite a good chafe and I looked like I had been strangled. I snuck a peak at my watch as we made the turn at the boats, I was happy to see I was on schedule for my goal of a sub 70min swim. I was enjoying the water, it was clear and fairly calm. I could see the bottom. I picked out a blue swim cap on the bottom and wondered if it’s owner was down there too. I made the last push to the pier and grabbed the stairs, I ripped off my speed suit with glee and made my way around to T1 on wobbly legs.

1:09:42

I rinsed off my face with some fresh water, grabbed my bag and dove into the tent, and with the help of another volunteer it was suit off, socks on, shoes on, glasses on, food in pocket, loo stop #1 and out to my bike. Helmet on and go go go.

4:44

Yay!! Spotted my posse as I took off on the bike.

Lol, my Dad showing me the way to go…

I settled in and got out onto the Queen K thinking ok Kona, show me what you’ve got, bring it, do your worst.

I had a plan, hold watts for an IF around .68-.69. Yeah, naa, that just did not feel right. I was hot and pushing those watts just felt a little more taxing than it should so I backed off a little and kept a closer eye on my effort than my watts. I guess the wind was kind because even at the lower watts I was still on schedule for a 5:40 bike.

The best tip from Mike, stay wet all day. So at every aid station I was grabbing a cold bottle of water and pouring it all over my body, it was keeping me relatively cool.

I was keeping an eye out for girls in my age group, I passed a few and but noticed as we got closer to the finish that we were all getting a little feisty and not letting each other get too far away.

The climb up to Hawi was the first time that I really felt good, not being familiar with the course had made me a little reserved but when I hit that climb I felt like I just had this one hard bit and I was more than half way. I made the turn for home at the top and launched myself down that descent with a mission. So much fun! I was ticking down the miles and aiming to be out on the run course in under 7hrs and that kept me on the gas all the way back into Kona.

Ugh, triathletes are disgusting, the visor on my helmet was totally aero but also saved me from taking a snot rocket the face. “Dude!!” I shouted as I passed, he looked really sorry, but still, look over your shoulder before you launch. Same goes for the girl taking a wee. Being splashed by someone else's piss is not cool either.

My guts were feeling a little sketchy nearing the end of the bike, I took a couple of Imodium hoping to hold off the horrible tummy cramps etc I seem to be prone to on the run.

I came hurtling down the bike finish chute, eyeballing my volunteer bike catcher, I dismounted like a swan gliding in for a landing on a lake while seamlessly passing my bike to the catcher. They will probably be playing that footage in the Kona highlights, because it was so freaking pro.

5:38:48

Into T2 in my socks, grabbed by bag, ripping off clothes as I ran, sort of like Superman - until my arms got hopelessly snagged in my super tight bike jersey and I resembled something more like a mad person trying to escape a straightjacket. Yay for those volunteers. So, shoes on, race belt in hand, loo stop #2 and off on the run.

4:33

Bahaaa, happens every time, my body rejoices for the 1st 2 km and I am lulled into a false sense of, “Oh hell yeah, I am going to be so amazing.” A quick glance at my overall time on my watch had me out on the run course in under 7 hours, yessss. I felt so confident that I was going to make that 11hr goal. All I had to do was manage a 4 hr marathon. Then at about kilometer 3 it began to suck. I saw my posse again at around this point, Simon and Ben ran alongside, giving me my position in the field and who was where, at that moment, they could have told me that there was a lion chasing me and it would not have made the bit of difference to my pace.

I ran on in misery, downing a couple more Imodium for my increasingly cranky gut. I had been taking salt tabs every hour, I had had mucho electrolytes and fluids on the bike and about 200 cals/hr all tried and tested and to plan.

Anyway, my mood began to shift, the discomfort in my gut was relieved for a little while. I was given a huge piece of ice at an aid station. I sucked it, rubbed it on my body, down my legs and sides, down my arms and over my face, I bit little pieces off and when it was small enough it put it down my top. (My gosh, that almost sound erotic - it quite possibly was!) By the time I was heading back along Alii Drive and saw my posse again, I was a different girl.

I got down to business, thinking, tidy posture, keep hydrated and wet. I was sad to see a few girls in my AG glide by but just kept to my own race and reminded myself that a sub 11 hr race was my goal and that racing someone else's game was not smart. There were 2 more loo stops on the run course, the last being out on Energy Lab road with about 16k / 10miles to go. After that I was feeling much better. I made it up out of the Energy Lab climb and headed for home gritting my teeth to hold on to that 4 hr marathon but intermittently smiling because I totally knew I was going to do it.

I was surprised to see another friend Liz cheering me on as I turned off the Queen K down Palani rd. Eek, that downhill was ugly, ouch, I felt like a robot, horrible form that I just could not fix at that point. I nearly cried when Simon told me I had a mile to go. A mile! Oh just make this OVER! Finally I entered the finish chute with an idiotic grin, feeling emotional, tired and proud. I punched the air 2 times as I crossed the finish line.

3:58:44

Total time: 10:56:31, 16/88 F45-49

So much room for improvement!

A friend asked me that night if I was keen to do it again, it only took one sleep for that answer to go from no way to yeah, I need another crack at that.

I got to spend another couple of days with Dad before we took off to opposite sides of the earth again. I was glad we got to see the town transform back into the cute little town it is 51 weeks of the year.

Mahalo!

I am surrounded by really hard working and intelligent people, people who inspire me to push myself and to be humble. (Well, I try with the humble bit.) I don't know many people more hard working and intelligent than Simon, he blows me away with his own dedication and humility and I live my life struggling to keep up with him. He is my biggest fan and I would not be doing any of this without his support.

My race experience was made really special with the support and fun with Ben, Lillian, Dad, Mike, Jeff, Liz and and Simon. Oh guys, thanks a million.

The online messages and texts from my family, my INTENT team mates, and friends were wonderful!! Pre race pep talks from my very good friend Jeff kept me in check. Much love to everyone who was following my race online and cheering along at home

My coach Rick Schopp at INTENT is also one of those inspiring people, I have put myself into painville at his instruction so many times but I am still here, I am still keen and I am getting faster. He has shown me that the pain pays off. Sending me the Urban dictionary definition of whinge when I slightly lost my shit during my second last intense training week leading into Kona was just the kick in the pants I needed.

(That sounds rough, he may have added a few additional kind words in there too.)

Much love to Alex and Theresa for taking great care of our boys while we were away.

Many thanks to the volunteers who gave their time and to the super cute little town of Kona for letting us take over!

Mahalo xo

Now I count down just a few weeks to Ironman Cozumel before we pack up and make the very exciting move to Denver, Colorado! Two more years in the USA before we head back to Australia.

Pic credits: Thanks Ben, Lillian and Simon

#racewithINTENT #iamspecialized #kona #IMWC17 #triathlon #ironman

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dontbeallupinmyfriesdawg · 8 years ago

Note

Ooh I've got a cute idea. What about a little reunion between Caroline, Bonnie, Elena, Tyler and Matt, a few years after TVD and they're all alive and happy and talk about their relationships (KC, KB, Stelena back together, Liz is revived and Matt can either be with Bekah or a human OC). Elena could be a writer and someone could be engaged... I just want all my babies to be safe and happy and for my ships to live.

A/N: A thousand apologies to the person who sent me this prompt ages ago. This is pure and beautiful and I’m honoured you sent it to me. I’ve just had so many exams and I only got around to writing this. I hope I’ve done your vision justice.

*For argument’s sake were gonna say that Klaus didn’t kill Tyler’s mom. Just the hybrids.

Thank you @purestheartslove for being my beta.

“I’m so glad you guys could make it!” Caroline exclaimed happily, nearly over-pouring Tyler’s glass of champagne in her excitement.

“Well your invitation was both heartwarming and semi-threatening so it wasn’t like we could say no,” Tyler teased, earning him a half glare from Caroline.

“All that matters is that you’re here,” she chided him. Raising her voice over the buzz of chatter in the living room. “Not my methods,”

“‘Car’s parked,” Both of them turned at the sound of Liv’s voice behind them. “What did I miss?”

“Caroline has alcohol as promised on the fancy invites,” Tyler smirked, looping his arm around Liv’s waist as she drew closer.

Caroline smiled softly at the couple. Thinking back to years ago, nearly a decade now. After she and Tyler had ended things and they were still raw and uncomfortable between them, he’d broken her heart and she’d shattered his in return. Never in a million years did Caroline think she’d be able to talk and joke amiably with him in her living room - the in the house she shared with Klaus no less.

They had both moved on and were living happy lives with other people, whom they respectively adored. Caroline had always inwardly taken pride in the fact, that she’d had a hand in bringing Tyler and Liv back together.

Despite what Tyler claimed.

Okay so, maybe it had had something to do with the fact that Liv’s brother had risen from the dead, hell bent on making Jo’s big day the wedding from hell and threatened everyone’s lives but somewhere along the lines, Caroline was certain Tyler had caught her memo about being adults and talking through his problems. So she afforded herself a pat on the back all the same.

After both reapplying to Whitmore and graduating, Tyler and Liv had decided to New York. They’d also decided to elope. Liv detested any sort of large scale function that involved her whole family - especially after the last time - and Tyler equally hated any kind of fuss and frills so, of course, it had seemed like the obvious solution.

Caroline had been thrilled for them, despite the party planner inside of her mourning the missed opportunity of arranging a spectacular ceremony.

At the mention of alcohol, Liv’s face perked up with interest.

“Good, I hope it’s something strong. That plane ride was hellish,”

“Just champagne,” Caroline replied, holding up the bottle and shaking her head. “How bad are we talking?”

“Try the fact that we were trapped between this sweaty-ass guy, who weighed about 300 pounds and a newborn that spent the entire flight screaming its ass off,”

“I got the screaming baby,” Tyler interjected, smiling humorlessly.

“If that wasn’t enough, our pilot decided to fly us through a tornado,” Liv deadpanned.

“The turbulence wasn’t that bad,” said Tyler, taking a swig of champagne. “She’s being dramatic,”

“Psssh, that’s easy for you to say. You, we’re snoring like crazy through the entire flight,”

“I didn’t snore!” Tyler protested.

Liv snorted.

“Why do you think the baby was crying?”

“Okay, well, drinks will help! Strong ones.” Caroline said, cutting into the couple’s playful bickering. “I think I have something better than this in the kitchen, I’ll be right back,”

“Oh by the way!” she added turning back around. “Is Luke coming?”

Liv chuckled and rolled her eyes.

“Luke is with his new fitness instructor boyfriend in The Cayman Islands- But he sends his best.”

Caroline nodded and headed out of the room, leaving Liv and Tyler to continue their spirited debate about who had the worse experience on the plane.

She wagered that antisocial hybrid of hers would be in their kitchen somewhere; lurking about, attempting to hide from what he described as a deplorable mixture of his relatives and Caroline’s friends. No doubt, he’d gotten through half their supply of bourbon already, Caroline mentally decided to stake him if he’d ignored her instructions and opened the good scotch she had been saving for the toast.

A smile formed on her face, as Caroline drew closer to the kitchen and she could distinctly hear the deep undertones of Stefan’s voice mingled with Klaus’ raucous laughter.

“You’d better not be up to no good in here,” Caroline called out, rounding the corner and coming face to face with a smirking Klaus and a slightly guilty looking Stefan.

“Are we ever, sweetheart?” Klaus grinned, knocking back the glass of brown liquid in his hands.

Seeing Caroline’s intent stare Klaus grabbed the near empty bottle of 1978 brandy from behind and showed it to her.

“Worry not love, it isn’t the good stuff I promise,” He strolled over to where she stood and placed an affectionate kiss on her forehead.

“I was just making sure our old friend had something substantial to drink while the two of us caught up.”

At the mention of Stefan, Caroline turned and flashed him an apologetic look.

“I am so sorry I haven’t had time to catch up with you and Elena since you arrived, I’ve just been so busy trying to get everybody comfortable that I just completely spaced. You guys must think I’m so rude-”

“Care, Care, slow down okay?” Stefan interjected. “Nobody thinks you’re rude, I’m sure it’s not easy playing hostess, especially to a bunch of vampires.”

“Ugh, you have no idea,” Caroline said, slumping down into one of the stools by the counter. “Where is Elena, anyway?”

“Uh, the last time I saw her she took off to go find Matt. Probably to grill him about his new sweetheart,” Stefan answered, taking a sip of his drink.

“Ooh, have you met her yet?”

“No, but considering we’ll only be able to see her two, maybe three more times before she gets suspicious that none of us are ageing, I’d better do it while I can.”

Caroline shrugged. “So we’ll compel her not to notice,” Noticing the pointed look Stefan was giving her she added. “With Matt’s permission… obviously.”

Klaus, who was rummaging around in the fridge for another bottle, laughed at that, prompting Caroline to glare at his muscular back.

“So how are you and Elena doing?” Caroline asked, changing the subject swiftly. “I hear her books doing well.”

“Number 1 New York times best seller,” Stefan replied, beaming proudly.

As Caroline had predicted, Elena saw sense and gave up on her ‘dream of becoming a new-age Meredith Grey, instead reverting back to her first love; writing. Under the pseudonym L.J Smith, Elena had released the summer’s hottest teen novel ‘The Vampire Diaries’. The story of Helen, a teenage girl struggling with the knowledge that vampires exist, while attempting to juggle school, family and love.

Was it predictable? Yes. But Caroline had to admit, Elena was a good novelist. In fact, she’d purchased a copy out of pure curiosity and found herself completely hooked and anticipating the next instalment, which Elena (or L.J) had promised would be released in the Fall. Caroline’s favourite character in so far had to be Carrie, Helen’s blonde, tenacious, fearless, best friend who reminded her of a certain someone. Although Klaus was less than impressed when informed of one of the story’s main villains, Nikolaj. A fearsome vampire hybrid, who could turn into a fire breathing dragon at will.

Caroline, needless to say had found that particular part hilarious.

“I haven’t had a chance to congratulate Elena in person,” Caroline mused, pouring the remaining bit of champagne in her hands into a glass.

“Hmm, yes nor have I,” Klaus interjected closing fridge. “Especially considering all the suggestions I have for Elena’s next book.”

Caroline turned and shot Klaus a warning glare as Stefan snorted in amusement.

“Well I’d love to sit here all afternoon and chat but I have a party to host,” Caroline said, swinging her legs off the stool and sweeping her hair out of her shoulders, exposing the diamond earrings Klaus had purchased for her birthday to the fluorescent light of the kitchen.

“And also the hostess with the mostess needs to tinkle so-”

“Okay, well we’re glad you invited us Care,” Stefan said coming towards her for a hug. “Hopefully you and Elena see each other at some point she’s been dying to catch up with you,” he hummed placing a kiss on her cheek.

“Hmm I hope so too,” Caroline smiled pulling back. “Hey, keep him in line the rest of the evening for me okay?” she asked pointing over to Klaus.

Stefan glanced at him over his shoulder and laughed.

“I’ll do my best.”

_____________________________________________________________________________

As Caroline headed up the stairs, she idly wondered if it was time to change the wallpaper in the foyer. Coming to a stop at the top, she frowned, hearing voices from the bathroom.

“Hello?” Caroline called out in confusion.

The voices stopped abruptly and then to Caroline’s surprise Bonnie emerged from the bathroom.

“Bonnie! Oh my gosh. When did you get here? Where have you been? I’ve been texting you, Bonnie!-” Caroline half chastised, half squealed pulling Bonnie into a tight hug.

“Oh!- Wow, hey Care. Yeah, I know I’m so sorry. I got here and I needed to freshen up so I just went straight to the bathroom,” Bonnie said, hurriedly attempting to answer all of Caroline’s questions.

“I’m so glad you came!” Caroline exclaimed, proceeding to hug the life out of her best friend.

“Are you kidding, I wouldn’t have missed this for the world.” Bonnie beamed, easing herself out of the hug.

“So where is he?” Caroline asked, a knowing glint in her eyes.

“Where is who?” Bonnie asked, shifting slightly on the spot, a faint blush on her cheeks.

“Kol, obviously,” Caroline said. “I know he’s here, he told Klaus on the phone last night he would be, he also said something about us preparing to have our entire liquor supply drained.”

“Mmm, well… you know Kol,” Bonnie chuckled, nervously rubbing the back of her neck.

“Bonnie are you okay?” Caroline asked, eyeing her, the tone of her voice shifting into one of concern. “You look weird.”

“Jetlag,” she replied quickly.

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah, definitely- uh, do you wanna go downstairs and get a drink?”

Before Caroline could answer a voice sounded from the other side of the bathroom door.

“Does that mean I can come out of here now?”

“Kol!?” Caroline said incredulously. Bonnie winced as she turned to look at her.

“What is he doing in there wh- what were you doing in there Kol?” Caroline demanded as Kol pushed open the door. Inexplicably, Caroline’s eyes were immediately drawn to the zipper on Kol’s jeans he was frantically attempting to do up as he emerged from the bathroom.

Only then did Caroline take notice of Bonnie’s rather dishevelled appearance; Caroline’s eyes darted between them and the widened in shock at the realisation.

“Were the two of you in there…. doing it, in my bathroom?!”

Judging by the smug look on Kol’s face and how embarrassed Bonnie looked in comparison, Caroline knew she had her answer.

“Seriously!?”

“I’m sorry, we got carried away, we’re sorry aren’t we Kol?” Bonnie insisted, elbowing a very un-sorry looking Kol in the chest.

“Ow! Bloody hell, fine I’m sorry. I promise Bonnie and I will replace everything we broke during our rampant love-making.”

“You’ll do what!?”

“Kol!” Bonnie shouted, scandalized.

“What’s all the screaming about up there?” A shrill voice demanded from the bottom of the steps.

Rebekah’s long legs, encased in a pair of ten-inch heels came into view. Looking up at the three of them with an unimpressed look she held up an empty bottle.

“You’re out of champagne Caroline. If I can’t drink I’ll be forced to socialise which if I remember correctly you insisted I didn’t do.”

“And I still am.” Caroline deadpanned, throwing Kol and Bonnie one last disparaging look before heading down the stairs, pointing her index finger at them threateningly. “I’ll deal with you two later.”

“Really?” Bonnie hissed at Kol, “You couldn’t have stayed in there three more seconds!?”

“What can I say,” he shrugged mischievously. “I like to make an entrance. Besides you weren’t complaining while we were in there.”

“Where’s your useless boyfriend,” Caroline asked Rebekah. “I sent him to get more drinks ages ago.”

“Honestly Caroline, if the responsibility of hosting is too much for you, perhaps you ought to leave this sort of thing up to the professionals.” Rebekah sang-song patronisingly.

“Oh, and that would be you I suppose.” she said dryly, eyebrows raised slightly.

“All I’m saying is, at my parties the guests are never dying of thirst.”

“At your parties, you compel a bunch of people to do all the work for you,” Caroline fired back.

Before Rebekah could fire a response the door was flung open and Enzo walked in holding ice and a large crate in his hands.

“Champagne on ice, just as her majesty ordered.” he quipped.

“Yeah, well, ‘her majesty’ ordered it about an hour ago so good job,” Caroline answered sarcastically.

“Lorenzo I could murder you,” Rebekah grumbled.

“Wonderful,” Enzo said. “Between the time I left and now, I’ve somehow managed to anger both of you.”

“You left me here, for God knows how long, with Caroline’s insipid guests-”

“-Don’t insult my guests!” Caroline gritted out.

“Women eh?” Kol interjected, strolling nonchalantly down the stairs. “There’s no pleasing them.”

“For my own safety, I’m not answering that,” Enzo replied as the two men shared a conspiratorial grin.

“I have other guests,” Caroline said, exasperated. “Enzo put that in the kitchen, Bonnie keep Kol away from people and Rebekah-”

Caroline angled her head towards the blonde original, her voice on edge and demanding. “-A smile wouldn’t kill you.”

______________________________________________________________________________

“Oh my goodness it’s beautiful!” Caroline squealed admiring the sparkling engagement ring, encased in a red velvet box in Matt’s hand.

“D’you think she’ll like it?” Matt asked, referring to a petite, honey blonde women in the middle of the room, making small talk with some of the other guests.

“I think she’ll love it.” she confirmed with a smile. “You know I’m really happy for you Matt and really proud.”

“Thanks, Care, I just hope this goes well,” he paused and flashed Caroline a bashful smile. “I really love her.”

“I can tell.”

“So does she know about us?”

Matt face contorted in confusion. “Caroline that was nearly fifteen years ago?” he whispered.

She nearly choked on her drink attempting to hold back her laughter. “No, Matt. I don’t mean us us. All of us.” Caroline said, gesturing to the scattered figures of their friends.

“Oh. No. No way.”

“Matt-” she began.

“It’s safer this way Caroline.” he insisted, stuffing his hands defensively in the pockets of his jeans.

“That’s a pretty big part of your life to withhold from someone,” Caroline gave him an imploring look. “Are you sure?”

“Positive.” Matt nodded. “I love you guys but I don’t really want her involved in all of this. I just wanna live a normal life, y’know?”

“Sure,” Caroline nodded “I understand,”

Although it was a lie, really. If Caroline was honest, she hadn’t thought about the prospect of living a life anywhere near normal in a very long time. Honestly, there wasn’t much about being human that she missed. Certainly not ageing. At that thought and seeing the laugh lines beginning to form in the corner of Matt’s eyes now that he was entering his thirties was a particularly surreal wake-up call. Eventually, Matt would settle down, lead his perfectly normal life and have kids.

And age.

And eventually, die.

Like all humans did.

One day, so would Bonnie and even Tyler. Even her immortal friends like Stefan and Elena may be living such different lives in 50 maybe 100 years from now. Who knows the next time they’d all be in the same place together.

______________________________________________________________________________

“Excuse me,” Caroline called out, tapping her spoon daintily against her glass. “Hello, can I get everyone’s attention please?”

“Here we go,” Rebekah muttered, downing her 3rd glass of champagne in the last hour.

“Vampire hearing, Rebekah,” Caroline whispered under her breath, invoking an eye roll from the Original.

“I would like to thank all of you for coming.” The attention of nearly all occupants of the room turned to Caroline.” Some us in this room have been through so much together and although a lot has changed and our lives have definitely panned out differently than we imagined I’m really proud of the people we’ve become and what we’ve managed to accomplish. I love all of you so much and hope that whatever happens next, I hope we’ll always remain a part of each other’s lives. So… here’s to us. Cheers.”

As a chorus of the same sentiment echoed around the room Caroline looked up and noticed Klaus smiling at her from across the room. She returned it and tilted her flute of champagne towards him, smiling at the irony.

Review Here.x

#klaroline #klaroline fanfiction #kennett #parkwood #rebenzo #klaroline shippers club #klaus x caroline #klaus and caroline #kc #fanfiction #klaroline drabbles

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flawedimagination · 8 years ago

Text

Rae of Sunshine- Chapter 3 Break You

Pairing: Eric/OC

Fandom: Divergent

Rating: M

Summary: Rae thought Amity was where she belonged. Even with her dark past fuming inside of her, she had always done her best to suppress it. With Choosing Day approaching she was confident in her decision to stay in Amity. That is until a certain Dauntless Leader came roaring into Amity's gates. Once Eric has Rae in his sights he is willing to do anything to have her, even if that means breaking her and destroying the world she lives in.

word count: 3,553

The compound looked ghostly at night. Empty of all its happy go lucky worker bees and the sound of all their buzzing. The only sounds that could be heard now were the chirpings of the pesky grasshoppers and crickets that roamed around in the fields. The chirping seemed to grow louder and louder until it suddenly ceased. Almost like something had interrupted them while rustling through the thick lush of grass.

A dark shadowy figure glided through the fields, heading in the direct of the wall that kept the unknown out. The silhouette moved through the thick forest where it stopped at a very familiar spot. Rae's old demolition site that had been abandon many years ago. It still contained all the shattered remnants of Rae's soul, along with the old beat up car. The hooded figure stepped further into the opening of the location, unveiling her hood.

"Lovely night for a stroll isn't it Johanna?"

Johanna was startled by the voice that came up from behind, causing her to suddenly jerk away from the hot breath on her neck. She peered into the glowing eyes staring back at her in anticipation for her to speak.

"Yes, it is. I'm glad it was nice enough for us to have our meeting you so urgently demanded. Now, what is it you want Kent?" Johanna said while straightening her back up.

"Oh come on Johanna. Don't you like our little chats we have? Okay fine I'll get to the point. He's not happy with Amity lately. First the shortage of food, now Dauntless patrolling around Amity. He's starting to become very displeased with your performance and feels like maybe Amity needs a little reminder." He threatened.

"No! No please! We're doing the best we can, but we have to have enough food for all the other factions, not just the Factionless. It's been hard reach your demands. As for Dauntless, there's nothing I can do. Their leader is growing suspicious. Please just give us more time. We gave you more than enough food last time."

"Johanna, he's been more than generous to Amity. I mean he's made sure to keep the chaos out of your compound. Remember he's the one keeping Amity from burning to the ground. And the only way to keep him satisfied is to give him your contribution to our cause. The more time given the more desperate our people become and you should know desperate people do desperate things." He warned.

"I know. I know what your people are capable of. Please just tell me what I need to do."

"It's simple. Get rid of Dauntless. Give us our food you owe and then wait until your services are needed again. See easy-peasy-lemon-squeezy. That is unless you decide to be uncooperative or Dauntless starts to cause us problems. Then we'll have to take some affirmative action people will start to get hurt, go missing, burn, but you already know that don't you?"

Johanna swallowed the malice of his words, knowing his threats we're real. "I understand. I'll have your supplies ready." She declared.

Kent smiled at her submission and chuckled. "Well, I'm sure he'll be happy to hear that. See the five factions have their system of operations and we have ours. You have a goodnight, Johanna. I can't wait till our next meet." He said slipping into the darkness of the forest.

Johanna narrowed her eyes as he disappeared into the murky woodland. Her mind was running in a million different directions. How was she going to get enough food together in time for the factionless on top of everyone else Amity had to feed? How was she going to get Eric and his Dauntless regime out of Amity? Did she just make a deal with the Devil?

Rae's mornings usually ran the same. She'd typically give herself an extra five minutes of sleep, which would result in her tardiness. She was lucky it was her day off considering the amount of sleep she got last night. The events from yesterday had her head spinning all night long. Rae wiped the sleep from her eyes and rolled out of bed. She needed to get ready for rehearsals with Joshua. Rae ran through her closet before settling on her favorite yellow sundress. She moved to the bathroom to brush her teeth and quickly ran her fingers through her loose curls. Stepping into the kitchen she could already smell the sweet apple cinnamon aroma in the air. Two apple turnovers and her peace tea were appropriately waiting for her along with her tea. After devouring her breakfast, she threw on her sandals and was on her way out the door.

Walking through Amity, Rae noticed a change in the atmosphere. The genuine smiles that walked around the compound seemed a lower than usual. This was probably due to the fact that Dauntless were hovering through the crowd. While most Dauntless moved swiftly to their assigned sentry duty. Some packs lingered around the dome, taunting any Amity that walked by. As Rae neared the dome, she knew she wouldn't go unscathed from their crude comments.

"Fuck! The guys back at home were right on one thing about Amity. The women here look fucking delicious. I mean look at those hips! Hey baby where you going?" one called out.

Some whistling followed suit but Rae just ignored their comment and moved to walk in before being stopped by a familiar face.

"Well Goodmorning Sugar. I've been thinking about you I wanted to get to know you a little better but you left in such a hurry last night I didn't get to. How about tonight we meet up for some cherry picking? Hmm, what do you say?" Luke proposed as he blocks her access.

"I'm afraid I'll have to decline your offer as Dauntless should be gone by this afternoon and I wouldn't want to cause you anymore insoluble feelings that I can't and would never return. Now if you'll excuse me." Rae quipped as she pushed passed Luke. She didn't bother looking back at his face as she pretty much had a good visual of what it probably looked liked.

As Rae entered she was astonished by all the decorations that were already up. There were elegant paper lanterns streaming all around. She could envision how beautiful it was going to look at night lite up. She noticed an array of ribbons and flowers that also adorned the walls. It probably was a good thing that Joshua was helping out with the decoration as it looked like a lot of work was put into decorating the dome.

Rae snapped out of her mesmerized state when she heard the loud banging of hammers. She looks over to the center where the tree stood and saw Joshua and another man working on the stage. Rae started walking towards the stage before being stopped by Cara.

"Oh, my gosh Rae. How are you? What do you think of the decorations? They were all my ideas. Their way better than last years don't you think?" Cara jabbered.

"Oh yeah. It looks really good Cara, you guys did a great job. I just came to see if Joshua wanted to go rehearse for a little bit."

"I don't know about that, we still have a lot to do. I'm sure your little song can wait." Cara said. Rae raised her eyebrow at Cara's comment. She knew Cara expected for her to roll over but Rae wasn't about to let that happen not when she and Joshua were finally starting to reignite their relationship.

"Well, why don't we just go ask Joshua what he wants to do." Rae declared as she brushed passed Cara. Cara trailed not far behind Rae. Joshua looked up from hammering to see Rae smiling at him.

"Rae, what are you doing here?" Joshua said surprised. "I thought we could rehearse a little since we didn't yesterday. Is that okay?" Rae questioned innocently. Cara was behind her with her hand firmly on her hips not looking too pleased with Rae.

"Of course! I'd love to. Besides we're almost done here anyway, I'll grab my guitar and we can go practice." Joshua declared while jumping off the half finished stage.

Rae smiled at the victory she just won against Cara, "Great!"

Rae enjoyed warming up with Joshua it gave them time to joke around and laugh. It was blissful to Rae, she felt like Joshua was the only one to make her feel truly happy. That's all she wanted with Joshua to be happy with herself and her life.

"The decorations look really great Joshua. That collar Cara has on you must be working." Rae giggled as he tuned his guitar. "Collar? What collar? All I did was help decorate." Joshua stated.

"Oh come on. It's obvious Cara wants you. That's why she pulled you away from me. To keep you all to herself."

"Rae, no one could ever pull me away from you."

"Do you really mean that?" Rae asked as Joshua leaned in inches from her face still smiling. "I do." He said. Their lips were millimeters apart when the doors suddenly burst open.

"Well well well. What do we have here?" Luke said with a pack of soldiers behind him. Rae turn blood shot red from the intrusion. First embarrassment came over her but was quickly turned into anger, but she knew she needed to contain it for Joshua's sake.

"We're rehearsing if you don't mind. Please leave we need to practice." Rae defended.

"Well if that's how you practicing mind if I chime in," Luke said walking towards the two of them.

Joshua stood up in front of Rae coaxing her behind him. Joshua puffed out his chest to try to intimidate Luke but his efforts were futile as Luke met his stance. "Look we don't want any problems," Joshua stated. Luke grabbed Joshua by the collar of his shirt pulling him dangerously close. "Well, then you should be causing any." Luke barked. "Let him go!" Rae yelled as she tried to pry Luke's hands from Joshua's shirt. Without any effort at all Luke's pushed Rae away with more force than he should have, causing her to hit the floor. She hesitated for a split second and then grabbed Joshua's guitar.

"You know what really bugs me about Amity? Hmmm? Pussy men like you." Luke spat as he reared his fist back ready to inflict pain. His actions were prevented when a guitar bashed the back of his head. Luke doubled back holding his head with his hands in pain.

"Motherfucker! You bitch!" he screamed.

Everyone in the room was in shock by the little Amity's actions even Rae, herself. The look of terror came over her face when she realized what she had done. Before she could even run the dauntless soldiers were already restraining her arms. She screamed and struggled in their firm hold. A stream of tears started staining her face as she looked to Joshua who was mortified by the scene. She kept screaming his name as they dragged her out of the room wondering what their plans were for her next.

She was placed in Johanna's office, which was unoccupied when they got there. Rae was still trembling, thinking about her punishment she would face for striking a soldier. ‘What would they do to her? What would Eric do to her?' She thought. Rae regretted not being able to control her rage but she couldn't just stand by watch Luke pummel Joshua like that. ‘Oh god! Joshua! He saw everything she did. What was she going to do now?' she thought.

Rae was pulled from her thoughts when she heard the door behind her fly open. She didn't look back to see who it was she wanted to make as little eye contact as possible. By the sound of heavy boots hitting the floor, she already knew who it was. Eric was silent as he made his way to the desk. As he sat down he kept quiet and only grinned at Rae. After a minute or two he finally began to speak.

"Well sunshine it seems you just can't stay out of trouble, can you? But I must say I was rather surprised when I heard you assaulted one of my men."

Rae didn't say anything, she couldn't even look at him after hearing his words. She thought back to last night and what had happened between them. Rae came to the conclusion that, that probably didn't help her situation. "You know, I knew you were different from the others. I could sense it, anyone in a five hundred mile radius could. You can act like your all about peace and harmony, but face it Sunshine you're just like me, full of rage and violence." He sneered.

"I am nothing like you!" she cried. "One of your men attacked my friend."

"And who was this friend?"

"It doesn't matter, the point is he was about to attack my friend and so my instincts just kicked in and I hit him with a guitar!"

Eric couldn't help but laugh, "If that's not a Hippie attack I don't know what is. Did you at least try to stop him with your ‘flower power'?"

"I did! He pushed me causing me to crash to the floor. I probably have bruises now!" Rae defended.

Eric demeanor changed after he heard about Luke pushing Rae. More importantly, he thought about how Luke had his hands on Rae. He was the only one who could touch. She didn't know this but she would soon enough. Before Eric could further his interrogation Johanna burst through the door.

"Rae! Oh, my goodness are you okay? Joshua came and got me and told me what happened." Johanna breathlessly said.

"Joshua is it?" Eric said getting confirmation on Rae's ‘friend.' He would be watching Joshua very closely now. Rae kept her head down and fiddled with her hands.

"Eric! What is the meaning of this interrogation? She has done nothing wrong. You have no authority when it comes to Amity and our punishments." Johanna claimed.

"I never said she was being interrogated. I just needed to get her side of the story and she has assaulted one of my soldiers. So since this involves Dauntless I have the authority to choose how to deal with this." He stated.

"Eric they were just getting ready for the festival coming up this won't happen again. Besides Dauntless is leaving today you have more important things to deal with than a small Amity incident." Johanna said hoping he would drop the punishment and leave with his Dauntless army.

"As it turns out Dauntless will be extending their stay here in Amity." He answered.

Rae felt her stomach flip, that meant more Dauntless, more Luke, More Eric. Her tears silently ran down her face as she looked to Johanna for some type of comfort.

"Under who's orders?" she asked. "Mine. Is that a problem?" he question. "Of course not everyone is welcomed here," Johanna said trying to seem calm by his answer.

"Good. I'm so glad I'll be able to attend the festival. You know how much Dauntless loves a good party." He said cheerfully as he got up to exit the room. "Oh and don't think you won't face any type of punishment Sunshine. You will, I just want to give the type of punishment you deserve. And don't worry about Luke I'll take care of him." He promised as he left the room.

Rae felt her whole world crashing around her. Johanna kneeled down in front of her and tried to stop her tears that kept pouring down her cheeks. "Calm down Rae. It's okay everything will be okay." Johanna hummed. "No, it won't! Dauntless won't leave. I can't take much more of this. Johanna, I need a stronger peace remedy. Please! I won't survive without it. The real me will come out and I can't have that happen. I might hurt someone like I did today. Please, I need it! Please" She begged.

"Shhh. Okay. Okay, I'll get you more. Don't worry I'll take care of it." Johanna said holding Rae trembling hands.

Eric stalked his way to the medical station to see Luke. He was infuriated that he thought he had the right to touch Rae after what had happened back at Dauntless. He needed to send Luke a clear message stating to never ever touch what is his. He found Luke doubled over hold an ice pack to the back of his head. He stood in front of Luke looking down at him like he was the lowest of the lows.

"You know I don't know what's more disappointing. The fact that you got taken down by a little Amity, a girl for that matter or that you still haven't learned your lesson from last time."

"Last time?"

Eric swiftly grabbed Luke's head bring him down making contact with Eric's knee. A burst of sheer pain went through Luke as his nose connected to Eric's knee. Eric then brought him up to his level shoving him against the hall. Blood trickled from Luke's nose splattering on Eric's hands. As it was Eric's style, he wrapped his hands around Luke's neck cutting off his air supply.

"I'm only going to say this once so listen carefully. If you ever touch her again, I'll fucking cut off your hands and make you wear them as a necklace." He threatened. "Do I make myself clear or do you need a little help understanding?"

"No! No! I understand I'll stay away from her! I swear!" Luke screamed. Eric threw Luke to the ground and continued to wipe his blood on the sides of his pants. "Good. Someone come clean this fucker up!" he commanded as he walked away.

After Johanna promised to get Rae a stronger peace remedy. Rae made her way home and was met by Joshua who was waiting for her. He ran to her and took her into his arms. She didn't cry and embraced his warm, caring arms.

"Rae I'm so glad you're okay. What happened? Will you be punished? I wish I could have stopped them. I'm so sorry, Rae."

"I'm okay. Eric hasn't made his decision on my punishment yet. Did you tell Poppy what happened?"

"No I've only told Johanna, but I can't say the same for the other Dauntless soldiers that were there." He exclaimed. Rae looked defeated in that moment word traveled fast through the factions it didn't matter which one you belonged to everyone knew everyone's business.

"Look, Joshua, what you saw today it… Well, it…"

"It doesn't matter. I should have stepped up more. Maybe if I had you wouldn't have had to do that. I promised you I would protect you and the first sign of danger I failed." He confessed.

"No Joshua you didn't fail. You could never fail. Your one of the most important person in my life." Rae said. Her words warmed him. Her brought her in putting his forehead against hers. They stayed like that for a while until they were interrupted by a dominating voice.

"Move along Amity," Eric commanded causing Rae to step back in fear. He knows who Joshua is now, his name, his face. Rae's worse nightmare was now a reality. Joshua stood there and looked at Rae. He knew who Eric was and knew his words shouldn't be taken lightly, but he also didn't want to leave Rae.

"It's okay Joshua. You should go. Don't worry about me, I'll see you tomorrow to practice." Rae assured him.

Eric stepped closer to Joshua, "Move along flower boy." Joshua swallowed whatever he was feeling and stepped away from Eric moving towards Rae. In fear of what Eric would do she stepped back a yelp "Goodnight Joshua. Please just go." Defeated Joshua said goodnight and turned away from Rae. He walked passed Eric who was grinning at the rejection. "Goodnight Joshua." Eric sneered. Joshua ignored Eric's sarcasm and made his way down the road.

"You don't have to be so mean you know. He wasn't doing anything wrong." She snide.

"Oh but he was. He was touching you and he should know he shouldn't touch things that don't belong to him."

"Fuck you! I don't belong to you. I'm not your property."

"You need to watch your mouth sunshine get this through your head sunshine you belong to me and I don't like other people touching what's mine. And if you don't understand that yet, understand this, if I see him touching you again well use your imagination." He warned as he caressed her cheek. He ran his thumb over her bottom lip. She flinched at his touch and tried to move away but his hold on her jaw was too strong that when she tried to move she was in pain.

"God I'm going to have so much fun with your punishment." He said calmly as he dropped his hand from her face. "What are you going to do to me?" Rae asked quivering.

Eric only smiled and turned to walk off leaving her to her own horrific thoughts. She almost couldn't hear him but it was clear what he said.

"Break you."

#eric divergent #eric fanfic #eric coulter #eric coulter x oc #eric divergent fanfiction #divergent #jai courtney #insurgent #rae of sunshine #fanfic #fanfiction #dauntless #amity #chapter 3

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littlemonsterlovestmnt-blog · 8 years ago

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Meeting the family for christmas

So this is from my first ask. How would Dean and Sam react from meeting shy!reader’s foreign family? They’re going to be Swedish since I don’t know why but they just asked for it. I will be writing Swedish with the help of a friend and the English translation will be in brackets beside it. And the readers name will be Hannah. Hope you enjoy little monsters!

I bit my bottom lip in anticipation, wringing my hands in front of my stomach and pacing around my room. I was wearing a comfortable pair of jeans, one of Dean’s red and green flannel shirts, and a Santa hat. “Hannah! We gotta go!” Dean shouted, then walked into my room a moment later. “Love the look.” He complimented, looking at my hat. I nodded, not fully hearing his words. “What’s wrong?” Dean asked, making his way towards me so he was standing in front, hands lightly gripping my shoulders. “Huh?” I asked, finally being pulled from my thoughts, suddenly aware of Dean in front of me. “What’s wrong?” He pressed gently. “Nothing.” I lied, shaking my head. “You know you’re an awful liar.” Dean teased .I sighed and shook my head, then pressed my forehead against Dean’s chest, shoulders slumping in defeat. “I’m just nervous about seeing my family.” “Why? Scared I’ll love the food and never wanna leave?” Dean asked, smirking. “More like I’m scared they’ll chase you away.” I sighed. “Not a chance!” Dean exclaimed, moving his hands so that he started massaging my shoulders. “Well, there’s also something I sorta forgot to tell you…” I started, blushing lightly, something I hadn’t done when I was alone with Dean for a few months now. “Yes?” “They, sorta, kinda, don’t know that we’re together.” I confessed. Dean was silent for a moment, his hands frozen on my shoulders. “They don’t know we’re dating?” “I was too scared to tell them!” “So we’ll tell them today.” Dean shrugged. “No!” I exclaimed, grabbing his forearms and shaking my head. “They know we’re living together, they’ll flip.” “We’ve been dating for months!” “But they can’t know that!” Dean was silent, frowning as he looked at me. But after a moment, he sighed and defeat crossed his features. “Fine.” He said, leaning in and giving me a quick kiss. “But we’re gonna tell them eventually.” “Eventually.” I repeated, nodding. Dean grabbed my hand and pulled me out of my room, to the garage where Sam was already waiting in the front seat. I jumped in the back, and leaned between the two front seats, knee bouncing nervously. “Sam, Hannah’s parents don’t know we’re dating. So keep it on the down-low.” Dean said, starting the car. “They don’t?” Sam asked, turning towards me.I blushed and shrugged, glancing down at the ground. “They’re so pushy and my dads old fashioned, and I didn’t wanna deal with the million questions.” “Don’t worry about it.” Dean said, smiling at me understandingly. “My dads got a shotgun.” “So do I” “YOU ARE NOT SHOOTING MY DAD!” I screamed as Sam laughed. “But what if he tries to shoot me?” He argued. I shrugged. “Oh well.” Sam chuckled. “You would let your dad shoot your boyfriend?” "Eh, I can always get a new one.“ Dean pouted and started the car as I leaned back in the seat.“I’d rather hang out with your family again.” I sighed. “Our family is just a bunch of friends, who, granted, we love, but we don’t even have any living blood relatives.” Sam said, shaking his head. “Yeah, but Christmas dinner with them was so easy! Charlie was awesome! And then dinner with Bobby the next day was so much fun! My family’s just gonna embarrass me and interrogate you guys.” I stated. “We’ll be fine.” Dean assured me. “Don’t jinx it.” You muttered, leaning back in your seat."They’re so Swedish.” I growled as they both rolled their eyes. “Well it is their heritage.” Sam told me and I rolled my eyes. “You don’t understand! You’re lucky we aren’t seeing my dads family cause they are even worse. But they’re small and my moms family, they’re loud, open, crazy and so so So… Swedish.” “You’re over exaggerating” “I’m not even half way through.” The rest of the car ride was spent in silence. I was mentally preparing myself for the dinner, while Dean was trying to remind himself not to show any affection to me. I heard a bing from my phone and checked my messages. I groaned while banging my head at the back of Dean’s seat. “Hannah, what are you doing?” Sam asked. “My grandpa’s coming!” "What? I thought he was family.“ Sam said as I rolled my eyes. "No! My Grandpa! Dad’s side! Mom invited him cause he’s escaping from New Jersey.” “You don’t like him?” Dean asked and I shook my head. “I love my grandpa, but you end up dating him instead of me.” I grumbled. Sam gave me a look while Dean rolled his eyes. “Why?” “He likes trucks, cars, food and violence.” I told them. “Looks like I’m gonna get a long with my future grandpa in law.” Dean laughed as I fidgeted. Sam gave him a look that obviously told him to dial it down. God, he was talking about marrying me already. They both knew I had problems with affection and opening up to people. I hadn’t even said “I love you” to Dean yet. I was too afraid I was going to lose him. But he didn’t seem to have a problem, he’s tried to tell me but always takes it back. Probably because he knows I’ll never say it back. “Sorry Hannah.” An hour later, Dean parked the car outside a medium red house with a beautiful garden. I took in a deep, calming breath, then slowly jumped out of the car.Before I’ve even inhaled the fresh air, my house’s door was thrown open, an overly excited ginger woman sprinting out of it, waving her hands in the air. “HANNAH!!!!!” My mom shouted, pulling me into her arms and crushing me in a hug.“Hi mom.” I said quietly, barely audible over my mom gushing over me.“Look how long your hair is! But you should get it cut with all those curls! Oh my gosh, the whole family is so excited to see you! And look at these boys!” She exclaimed, just a hint of an accent in her words, finally letting me go and looking over Sam and Dean. “Mom, this is Dean, and this is Sam.” I said, pointing the boys out. “Guys, this is my mom.” “Nice to meet you, Mrs. Murphy.” Dean said, smiling sweetly and offering her a hand. “Boy, put that down!” mom insisted, then pulled Dean into a hug. Dean’s eyes widened before amusement spread over his face, his bright green eyes glancing at me and sent me smirk and a wink. “You can both call me Helen or whatever!.”My mom said, then pulled Sam to her. “Um, okay.” Sam said, caught off guard by her loudness. “IS THAT HANNAH?” my sister Catherine’s unmistakable voice screeched from the house. I sighed and turned to the door, then waved. “IT’S HANNAH EVERYBODY!” My other sister Shannon shouted, and soon a whole crowd of family members were standing by the door. My aunts, Maria and Sussane and Patricia, my uncle Micke and Joakim, my cousins, Johannes, Jonathan, Rasmus, Julia, Tindra and Ben. My Mormor (mother’s mother) and Morfar (mother’s father) , my other foster grandparents, Aina and Gustav, my dad, my sisters, Shannon, Alexandra, Catherine, and my brother Michael. Our dog coco, my cousins dog Shiva, Valder, our other dogs Duchess, Cleo, Billy, Rosie, Lily, Brownie, Beauty and Cinderella. And my Grandpa. “C'mon!” My mom insisted, ushering me into the house. “Wow.” Dean whispered as he moved to my side. “Shocked?” I asked. “I didn’t expect them to be so….” “Loud?” I teased. “Outgoing.” Dean corrected. “Hey poofy hair!!!” Michael yelled as dean gave me a look. “Poofy hair?” “Shut up."I could feel the blood rushing to my cheeks as my family flipped out over me, the boys, their car, just about everything. Soon I were pushed into a chair at the large dining table, luckily right beside Dean. Unluckily with my dad on my other side. “So, Sam!” My cousin, Tindra who was sitting across from Sam, started, “what do you do for a living?”I watched in embarrassment as she rested her arms on the table while everyone turned their attention towards him. “Oh, uh…” Sam answered, glancing at me. “They know about hunting.” I told him, and Sam seemed to visible relax. “I’m a hunter.” He told my cousin, then looked anywhere but at everyone.But that would never work.“Where are you guys staying?” My mom asked. At the same time, aunt Sussane questioned, “How long have you known each other?”Then, of course, my other cousin Julia demanded, “You’re not dating, are you?” "Of course, not! They’re not Hannah’s type.” My cousin Johannes exclaimed. Sam and Dean looked around the room, unsure of who to answer first. Dean then gave me a questionable look. “We’re not your type?” He hissed as I tried to ignore him. “We’re staying in a house in Kansas, we’ve known each other almost a year, and no, we’re not dating.” I answered for them, my cheeks flaring up at the attention. “LOOK! She’s blushing!” Maria another aunt exclaimed.Everybody around the table laughed, and I groaned as I buried my face in my hands. “She’s always been a shy nerd.” My dad told Sam and Dean. “Shy nerd, what about poofy hair?.” Dean repeated, smirking at me .“Kan ni va så snälla och sluta? (Can we just please stop?).” I begged, using another language. “Aså, vi bara retar lite! (Come on, we’re just easing a little!)” My mom assured me. “Vad då? Känner du dig pinsam? (What? You feeling embarrassed?)” Alexandra the other sister questioned. “Jag tror hon gillar en av dom! (I think she likes one of them.)” Michael exclaimed, earning a laugh from all my family, only making me blush more. “Nej, hon är ju med Melissa!” (No, she’s together with Melissa!) Ben told them as I tensed up. “What are they saying?” I heard Dean whisper to Sam. “Nothing.” I told him, making my voice loud enough so my family knew I was done speaking in a different language. “Oh, Hannah’s just no fun.” Johannes said. “Oh, I disagree.” Dean said, leaning back in his seat, squaring his shoulders. I saw his arm start to move towards me, but he stopped, placing it by his side. “She’s plenty of fun.” My whole family laughed, and I just buried my face in my hands again. “No, really.” Dean insisted. “I mean, for Christmas we wore these God-awful sweaters around the mall!” “No way.” Rasmus said, shaking his head.“She would never.” Maria agreed. “Well, we did.” Dean shrugged, glancing at me with a smile. “Jag tror hon blev blyg hela tiden!” (”I bet she was so shy the entire time!”) Shannon exclaimed. “Men om hon gillar Dean då skulle hon har gjort det. Kanske hon gillar killar nu.” (But if she likes Dean then she would have done it. Maybe she likes guys now.”) Tindra giggled.

“Hannah?” Your dad demanded, looking at me sternly. “Nej! sluta nu!“ (No! Just stop it!”) I lied, face burning bright red. “Kolla på henne! Hon blir helt röd!!” (Look at her! She’s all red!”) Morfar laughed, clapping his hands. "So Hannah, how is it going with you and Melissa?” My dad asked trying to break the subject. I mentally groaned, hoping Sam or Dean wouldn’t notice. “Who’s Melissa?” Sam asked as Shannon chocked on her drink. “How can you guys not know Melissa if you live with Hannah? They are always together!” My grandpa said with a Santa laugh. “Melissa is Hannah’s girlfriend!” Michael shouted as Dean and Sam gave me a look. “You’re a lesbian?” Dean questioned with a whisper. As tear started to fill my eyes. “We broke up.” I interrupted as Maria gasped. “But you loved her. What happened?” "Yeah?“ "Did she want her boyfriend from Stockholm back?” "Are you straight again?“ "Did you find another girl?” Tears welled in my eyes as I tried to hold them back.“What’s for dinner?” I asked my mom, hoping to end the conversation. “It’s a surprise!” My mom announced in a sing-song voice, slowly standing up. “Why don’t you two strong boys help me carry the food in?” She asked Sam and Dean, who nodded and followed her to the kitchen. “C'mon, Hannah, you’re telling us you lived with those two, super hot guys, and haven’t-” Alexandra started. “No!” I exclaimed. “Guys, she likes girls.” Ben reminded them. She huffed and sat back in her seat, crossing her arms over her chest .“Can we please stop talking about this?” I pleaded.Sam and Dean started to walk into the room, both carrying bowls of some of my favorite food. Swedish food of course. skagen, meatballs, herring, etc.I smiled as Dean’s arm grazed against mine just barely as he put a bowl in front of me. "Why didn’t you tell us? You’re a lesbian?“ He asked and I shushed him. Sam decided to distract my family while I turned to Dean to quietly talk for the precious spare minutes we had left. "Why is this such a big deal?” I told him. “That’s because I’m your boyfriend. It’s kind of important if I want to know if you’re maybe cheating on me with a girl.” I sniffed. “You think I’m pretending to be with you and hooking up with a girl? You don’t trust me?” He rubbed his temples as if he was getting a migraine. “No, it’s just this all hitting me all at once.” I grabbed his hands under the table and held them with a squeeze. “Melissa couldn’t handle dating a girl that was her best friend. We don’t talk anymore.” I assured him. Just as my mom entered the kitchen carrying the big entree for the night, there was a loud knock on the door. My family looked around, sharing conspiratorial smiles. “Hannah, maybe you should get that.” My mom suggested. “What did you guys do?” I groaned, reluctantly standing up.I moved to the door, and opened it, expecting to see an old school friend.Not the guy I’d had a crush on as a child.His name was Benjamin. He lived a couple of miles away from me as a kid, and I had made the mistake of telling my family about my crush on him. You’d think I told them that I was betrothed to the guy, since they never forgot, and brought him up at every chance.Benjamin had grown up, though. He was no longer the afro nerdy kid with the huge curly hair. Now, he was tall, not as tall as Sam or Dean, but I still had to look up slightly. His hair was chopped off, and he had an easy smile.

“Tjena Hannah!” (Hey Hannah!) He greeted, opening his arms. “Uh.” I answered, staring at him. He laughed, slowly lowering his arms. “Same old, Hannah banana.” He commented. “Right…” I said, staring at him. “Did my mom-?” “Yeah, the whole family invited me.” He answered, nodding. “Of course they did…” I muttered, shaking my head. “Well, um. You can… We’re eating… Come in.” I managed to say, and Benjamin walked into my home, straight to the dining room. “Benjamin!” mom shouted, jumping up and hugging him. “How are you?!” “Good, thanks for inviting me.” He answered, giving my whole family a charming smile.But the smile faltered as he looked at Sam and Dean. “Benjamin, why don’t you sit here?” My dad unwillingly offered, getting up and moving to a new seat. “Thanks!” Benjamin said, plopping down. Reluctantly, I moved back to my seat, scooting the chair closer to Dean as much as I could without being obvious. “Hi, I’m Dean.” Dean said, reaching across me to offer Benjamin his hand. “And this is my brother Sam.” Dean added as Benjamin grabbed onto Dean. I watched in dismay as they both seemed to grip hard, checking each other out.Benjamin didn’t know that he had no chance. “How do you know Hannah?” Benjamin asked, letting go of Dean’s hand.“We live together.” Dean answered, smiling innocently.“Oh?” Benjamin asked, glancing at me. I guess my family told everyone that I was dating Melissa. “But they’re not dating!” Shannon quickly exclaimed while sending me a wink. I glared at her as she sent me a cheeky smile. I was going kill her in skagen. “Oh.” Benjamin said, a small smirk finding it’s way onto his lips.“But are you still together with Melissa?” He asked as everyone shouted no. “The food!” I exclaimed, reaching forward and grabbing a roll of bread.Luckily, that sparked everybody into action, and soon plates were being passed and laughs exchanged.“Who is this guy?” Dean whispered under the clamor of dinner.“An old friend.” I answered.“Not a boyfriend? Did you date guys too or only girls?““I mean… I had a crush on him when I was younger. Never dated him. Melissa was my first relationship.” I confessed, blushing horribly.“When you didn’t know me.” Dean reminded me.“Yeah… Sort from once I meet him until I meet you.” His eyes wandered to Benjamin as if he could kill him in one simple look. “Wow…. Big crush."“Trust me, if my ten year old self knew you, I wouldn’t have given Benjamin a second look.” I assured him, earning a large smile. “Viska inte på bordet Hannah!” (Don’t whisper at the table, Hannah) Mormor so kindly exclaimed. “Vad viskar ni om?” (What you whispering about?)” My dad demanded. “Ingenting!” (Nothing!) I exclaimed. “Kom igen nu, vad pratar du om?” (Come on now, what are you talking about?) Benjamin pleaded. “Oh great, he speaks it too.” Dean grumbled beside me to Sam. “Det är inget för fan!” (For fucks sake, it’s nothing) I assured them, blushing as I moved to grab a bowl of salad.

“Svär inte Hannah!” (Don’t swear, Hannah!) Benjamin teased while brushing his hand on my shoulder. I shivered and tried not to meet Dean’s gaze. “Förklara till mig ny annars får du ingen Skagen.” (Explain for me or you wont get any skagen) Benjamin said, grabbing my arm. He’d said it with easiness, showing that he was joking, but his grip on my arm still stopped me from moving. “Ge mig jävla Skagen om du vill fortfarande leva.” (Give me the fucking skagen if you still want to live.) I growled. “Let go of her, buddy.” Dean ordered, leaning forward so he could glare at Benjamin across from me. “You gonna do something?” Benjamin scoffed with an air of confidence. “Nope.” Dean answered, shaking his head. “But she definitely will.” “What did you tell him anyway?” Sam whispered. "I said I will kill him if he doesn’t give me the fucking skagen.“ Everybody at the table became quiet, probably for the first time that day. Benjamin laughed humorlessly, but dropped my arm. “We were joking. I guess you wouldn’t understand that since you don’t speak the right language.” “I speak enough languages to know that you’re a dick.” Dean muttered, just loud enough so I could hear, making me laugh, which I quickly tried to cover up. Then silence filled the room. “Alright!” mom shouted, clapping her hands, never one to stand the quiet. “Jonathan, I heard you just got a girlfriend!” Everybody moved on from Benjamin and Dean and I, and I managed to slip under the radar during most of the dinner.But that never lasted for long. “Benjamin, tell Hannah about your big competitions!” My sister pleaded.Benjamin turned slightly in his chair, giving me his full attention. As a kid throughout my life, I would have killed to be in this moment. “Well, I work with this racing that….” He started, but I quickly tuned out, already bored.Besides, Dean had grabbed my hand under the table.He rubbed small circles into my skin, somehow showing that everything was gonna be okay and that i’d be home soon with that small gesture. I didn’t know I had started smiling until Alexandra giggled. “Kolla på hennes ansikte.” (Look at her face.) She whispered to Shannon, who nodded.I rolled my eyes just slightly, and tried to focus on Benjamin’s words .“…I mean, if you want, I’d be happy to bring you to a meeting.” “Oh, uh, that’s… No thanks.” I said .“You’re just too shy to accept.” He said. “You can come to a meeting, then we can get lunch. Or maybe dinner.” “You know, uh, I…” I was never good at turning people down, it’s not like i had any experience doing it. “Tomorrow, maybe?” He pressed. “You know, we’ve got a hunt tomorrow.” Dean said, saving me. “Then the next day.” Benjamin shrugged .“It’s a pretty far hunt.” Sam said, helping me out. “How about I call you?” I suggested, knowing I never would. “Or I could call you.” He offered. “Um…” I replied, never good at these kinds of things. “Oh! She’d love that!” mom answered for me. “Mom!” I hissed, eyes widening. “You’re welcome, love.” She winked. “Benjamin, I-” I started, shaking my head. “Oh! Dessert time!” mom shouted, jumping up. “Hannah, come help me!” I sighed in frustration, dropped Dean’s hand, then followed my mom to the kitchen.“Sweetheart, Benjamin is asking you on a date! Stop being so difficult!” mom whisper-shouted.I silently nodded, fiddling with my hands.“Why are you making this so hard?” My mom pressed. "Is it Melissa? I’m sorry honey. I knew how much you loved her but maybe you like boys.” I was never good at confrontation, at telling my mom what I really wanted. Even when I told her I liked girls too or on how I felt about anything. I had panic attacks because of her which affected me my entire life. But, just this once, I had to do it. I took in a deep breath, then looked up at my mom, holding her eyes. “I-I just don’t really-” “ Bring out the dessert!” my dad shouted from the dining room. “WE’RE WAITING!” Morfar added. “DON’T EAT IT ALL!” Michael yelled .“IS THERE MEAT?!” Grandpa shouted as everyone laughed.Mom sighed and turned from me, ending the conversation. “Grab that bowl.” She ordered. “And tell Benjamin you’d love to go out with him!”Just as mom started to leave the kitchen, Dean appeared in the doorway. “I thought I could help.” Dean said, glancing at me.“Oh, so sweet!” mom exclaimed. “Grab a bowl.” Then she left the room.Dean rushed to stand in front of me, and was surprised to find me pulling him into a furious kiss. “I hate this.” I said, pulling away.“Wish I could say the same.” He replied breathlessly.“Dean, I’m too shy to tell them we’re dating, so now they’re trying to push Benjamin on me! If I just told them-!”“Hey, hey.” Dean interrupted gently. “You’ll never have to see Benjamin again.” He promised me. “And we’ll tell your parents we’re dating some other time. When you’re whole family isn’t around.”I nodded and wrapped my arms around him, burying my face in his chest. “Now, before anybody gets suspicious, we should get back out there.”I nodded and grabbed a bowl, as did Dean, then walked back into the mayhem.Julia had moved, and was now sitting next to Sam, one hand touching his arm. Sam fidgeted uncomfortably, nodding politely.“Oh, hey! I hope you don’t mind if we switch seats?” She asked, looking at Dean.“You can just take my seat.” I quickly offered, then, before anybody could argue, moved across the table to sit next to Alexandra.“Oh! I wanted to sit next to Dean.” Alexandra said, jumping up. “Benjamin, switch seats with me.”“Why do you want to sit next to Dean?” I demanded. Alexandras eyes widened at my authoritative tone, one I’d never used before.“I wanna ask him about hunting.” She replied, whirling around.Before I could stop it, Benjamin was sitting next to me, offering me a wink that sent my blood boiling. Dean looked at me across from the table, smiling at me sympathetically.But as Dean’s eyes drifted to Benjamin, his jaw clenched.“Hannah, have you told Sam and Dean about that time when you were-” Sussane started, laughing already at the memory.“Please no.” I begged quietly.“Oh! I love this story!” mom cackled.“-You were six and from when you were thirteen and had a crush on Benjamin, so you told him there were monsters in his basement so you could keep going over his house!” My aunt finished.I blushed furiously, then buried my face in my hands, shaking my head slightly. I had done that, and a lot more embarrassing things. But I didn’t want Dean or Sam to hear about how stupid i was as a child."Remember when she kept telling everyone to save a date for when she was eighteen because she was planning to marry him!” Johannes exclaimed.Then, to make matters worse, Benjamin wrapped an arm around my shoulders.I tensed immediately, head snapping up and eyes finding Dean’s, who’s were alight with anger. I watched as he clenched his fist, then forced his eyes down to his plate.He didn’t want to bring attention to our relationship.But I couldn’t let it slide.I didn’t know what had caused me to snap; my family’s constant teasing, Dean’s extreme understanding, or Benjamins annoying presence. Probably all three. But I couldn’t take it anymore. “Get your arm off me.” I ordered, and once he didn’t move, grabbed his hand and threw it off me.The table had gone completely silent, my whole family watching. “I do not want to go out with you. I don’t even want to see you again!” I exclaimed, glaring at Him. “And Alexandra switch seats with me.” I demanded, standing up and walking to my rightful seat beside Dean. Alex stood up, staring at me in shock and then stiffly made her way to her seat. I sat down with a humph, and glanced at Dean, him smiling openly at me. “I have something to tell you all.” I announced, figuring that I should get everything out in the open while I was feeling confident. “I’m dating Dean.” I stated.“No way!” Johannes scoffed.“It’s true.” Dean shrugged, his hand grabbing mine from across the table.I knew my face had turned a light shade of red, but I willed it away, staring at my family.“How long?” Dad asked quietly. “A few months.” I answered, trying to keep the tremor that was trying to find it’s way into my voice at bay. “Why didn’t you tell us?” mom demanded. “And you’re living together?” My dad questioned. “You’re only dating the one boy, right?” Mormor pressed. “She better be.” Julia grumbled in response. “Michael do you remember where my shotgun is?” With all these people yelling questions at me, my confidence started to fade, leaving me a stammering, blushing mess.But Dean was there to save me.“She was nervous about what you’d say.” Dean told my mom probably because he thought I was joking about daddy having a shotgun. “And, yes sir, we are. But I can assure you, we’re taking our relationship very slowly. Please don’t shoot me.” Dean said, turning to my dad.“And she’s only dating Dean.” Sam added.“Great!” Alex exclaimed.“But I have a girlfriend in Canada!�� Sam lied, scooting away from my sister. “Varför sa du ingenting!” (why didn’t you say anything?) mom exclaimed.“Vad annat har du gömt?” (Have you been hiding something else?) ”Hur träffades ni?“ (How did you meet?”) ”Har nu knullat?“ (Have you fucked yet?) “RASMUS!” “HANNAH!” “MAMMA!” “HANNAH!” “PAPPA!” “KAN NI SLUTA FY FAN!” (CAN YOU STOP FOR FUCKS SAKE!) "Ska jag gå nu?“ (Should I go now?) Benjamin asked ."Nej, Benjamin, stanna.” (No, Benjamin, stay) My mom answered. “Man vet aldrig om det kommer att fungera med Dean.” (But you never know if it’s going to work out with Dean.) Morfar whispered, not exactly quietly.

“Kan ni sluta!?” (can you guys stop?) I begged. “Jag är glad med Dean. Jag har alltid varit blyg och tyst men han får mig att känna ner bekväm med andra människor! Especielt när Messie lämnade mig för en jävla kille! jag älskade henne så jävla mycke men hon kunde vara med mig för att jag var en tjej. Jag har inte känt så här bra sedan Messie. Han är gullig, snäll och… Jag älskar honom!” (I am happy that I am with Dean. I have always been shy and quiet but he lets me feel comfortable with other people! Especially when Melissa left me for a fucking boy. I loved her, so fucking much but she couldn’t be with me just because I was a girl. I haven’t felt this good since Melissa. He’s sweet, kind and… I love him.”) Once again, everybody stared at me.I fidgeted uncomfortable, and blushed, then glanced down at the table. Dean, although he had no idea what I had all just said, squeezed my hand, making me turn my gaze to him. He winked, making me smile and relax slightly. “Fine.” dad stated, leaning back in his seat. “Fine?” mom and family repeated in unison. “Yes. Fine.” “You’re cool with us dating?” I asked quietly. Dad shrugged in response, giving a slight nod. “But if you hurt my daughter, I will destroy you. Michael, you can put the shotgun back.” “Don’t worry, sir.” Dean replied, squeezing my hand.I blushed lightly, but smiled at my dad, overjoyed by his reaction. “Hannah, are you sure?” mom whispered, leaning over so Dean couldn’t hear.I stared at her in shock. My father, the one who I was most worried about accepting my relationship, was cool with me dating Dean. But my mom, was questioning it? I thought she’d be throwing a party at the thought of me having a boyfriend! “I mean, Benjamin. You’ve liked him all your life. And you love Melissa.” She added. “I don’t anymore, I never had chance with him. Messie couldn’t handle being with me.” I stated, unable to mask the past sadness in my voice. “But I love Dean, mom” “I’m just gonna go then…” Benjamin said, slowly standing up. “See ya!” Dean said, waving to him, not hiding his shit-eating grin in the slightest. “I’ll walk you out!” Catherine offered, jumping to her feet and ushering him to the door. “We should go too.” I said, looking at Dean, who nodded and slapped Sam’s arm before standing.Everybody else rose to their feet, and I was rushed with hugs. As my mom pulled me against her, she rubbed my back. “I just don’t want you to get hurt.” She whispered. “I won’t.” I assured her, then kissed her cheek. “I also have a shotgun you know.” I told her and my dad patted me on the back. “That’s my girl.” My family followed me and the boys to the door, then waved and shouted goodbyes as I walked to the Impala. Sam let me sit up front, exhausted by dodging my sisters and in desperate need of a nap.I sighed in relief as Dean drove away from my house, making it fade in the distance. “That was torture.” I stated, rubbing my temples. “I’m so proud of you.” Dean said, grabbing my hand and raising it to his lips. “Dean, I thought I was gonna throw up.” “But that didn’t stop you from telling your family the truth. You told them how you felt, that you were annoyed by what they were saying… You’re so strong.” He told me.I blushed at his compliment, and had to look away for a moment. “I was just so upset.” I confessed. “I mean, even after I told them, they kept questioning me. Like they didn’t trust me.” Tears started to fill my eyes, but I quickly blinked them away. “Hey, hey…” Dean said, making me look at him. “Family is supposed to support you. If they don’t, ignore ‘em. And we both know we’re never gonna leave each other. So who cares what they say? They don’t know anything. And you stood up to family, one of the hardest things to do. The girl I fell in love with a few months ago would never have done that!“ I smiled at Dean, then scooted across the seat, so that I was right next to him. I kissed his cheek, his stubble rubbing against my lips. "Did you just say that you love me?” I asked and he rubbed his neck. “I’m sorry.“ Dean said, as he let go off my hand sheepishly. "I know that you’re not big on affection and that you don’t trust your emotions a-"I interrupted him and taking his hand again. "You know, I told them that I love you. No one has made me feel this way since Melissa. And I loved her. I loved her so much and she just broke my heart. But I know now that I love you Dean Winchester.”

Dean drove the rest of the way home in a comfortable silence, as he had a huge grin on his face. Both of us just taking solace in each other’s company. “I love you too.” “I know.” I made sure to push my family’s doubts from my mind, knowing that my opinion, and my opinion alone, mattered.“You know what’s great?” Dean said as I turned to him with a smile. “What?” He gave me a smirk. “That I get to tap that and not Benjamin.” "Dean Winchester!

#christmas #dean winchester #dean x reader #i love you #shy!reader #sam winchester #dean #fanfiction #tumblr

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airoasis · 7 years ago

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22 of the Best Motivational Speeches of All Time

It was halftime throughout one of my 7th grade football games. And we were losing 14 - 0. With our knees planted in the grass, my team was silently gathered, drenched in sweat and defeat. We all understood the game was over.That's when our

assistant coach ruptured through our circle and shattered our pity party, providing among the best inspirational speeches I have actually heard to this day.I can't straight estimate him because he said some

things that are improper for an article(and, in hindsight, most likely for a lot of 13-year-olds too). The point is, he harnessed the power of words to invigorate a physically and mentally drained group. And we returned clawing to win the game.Just like in sports, being motivated at work is vital for your performance.

This rings specifically true when you have a looming due date, an important presentation to provide, or colleagues or customers depending upon your performance.To help you remain motivated, no matter what your task tosses at you, we decided to put together 22 of the very best motivational speeches

from company, sports, home entertainment, and more. If you desire to get fired up for a job, watch these videos. Believe me, I was ready to compose a 5,000 word post after I saw them. And while the messages vary from speech to speech, they will put you in the ideal state of mind for taking on and squashing your next huge difficulty.(Disclaimer: Some speeches-- * cough * Al Pacino * cough *-- may consist of NSFW language.

)16 of the Best Inspirational Speeches 1)J.K. Rowling:" The Fringe Benefits of Failure, and the Importance of Imagination"

(2008 )In J.K. Rowling's 2008 Harvard beginning speech, the Harry Potter author checked out how 2 phenomena-- failure and imagination-- can be crucial to success. While failure can help you understand where your real passion lies, and where you ought to focus your energy moving on, creativity is what will permit you to understand with other people so you can utilize your impact to do good.We do not need magic to alter the world, we carry all the power we need inside ourselves currently: we have the power to think of better. "2)David Foster Wallace: "This Is Water"(2005 )From the opening minutes of David Foster Wallace's

2005 Kenyon College beginning speech, where he concerns start speech conventions, it's clear that Wallace has some major wisdom to share. The core of his speech: A lot of us ignore our own

close-mindedness. We picture ourselves as the centers of our own, individual universes, instead of seeing the bigger, more interconnected picture.If you're automatically sure that you understand exactly what truth is and who and what is really important, if you want to operate on your default setting, then you, like me, most likely will not consider possibilities that aren't irritating and miserable. If you've really discovered how to think, how to

pay attention, then you'll understand you have other choices. It will really be within your power to experience a crowded, hot, sluggish, consumer hell-type circumstance as not just meaningful, however spiritual-- on fire with the exact same force that lit the stars: love, fellowship, the mystical oneness of all things deep down. "3 )Brené Brown: "The Power of Vulnerability"(2013)The video above is an animated excerpt from researcher Brené Brown's speech, " The Power of Vulnerability. "In the speech, Brown checks out how our worry of not being great enough(amongst other worries) drives us to protect ourselves from our own vulnerabilities.

The option to using this emotional match of armor: Welcome vulnerability throughunderstanding with others.Empathy is a choice, and it's a vulnerable option. Due to the fact that in order to link with you, I have to get in touch with something in myself that understands that feeling."4)Al Pacino:" Inch by Inch"(1999)Yes, this speech is from a football motion picture(Any Given Sunday ), but trust me: This isn't your stereotypical rah-rah-go-get -'em sports speech. It's deeper than that. It's about life, and loss, and ... gosh darn it simply pay attention to Al Pacino, he's pouring his soul out!Either we recover as a group or we're going to fall apart, inch by inch, play by play, till we're

finished. We're in hell right now, gentlemen, think me

. And we can remain here and get the$& # @ tossed out of us, or we can combat our method back into the light. We can climb up from hell, one inch at a time."5)Steve Jobs:"The Best Ways To Live Before You Pass Away "(2005 )Thinking about the YouTube video of Steve Jobs'2005 Stanford commencement speech has 24 million views (not counting the 10 million+

additional views from replicate uploads), it's most likely that you've seen this one currently. In the speech, Jobs plays on 2 themes: linking the dots (anecdote: how taking a calligraphy class assisted influence the style of the Mac )and love & loss(anecdote: how getting fired from Apple helped influence his

greatest innovations ). Maybe the most remarkable part his speech comes

at the end, when he quotes the(now-famous)lines from the final problem of his favorite publication, The Entire Earth Catalog: Stay hungry. Stay foolish. "6)Ellen DeGeneres: Tulane University Beginning Speech(2009)Ellen's speech, as you might anticipate, has its amusing minutes. However it likewise checks out a few of the really individual and tragic episodes in her life that assisted push her into funny in & the first location. 2 essential styles of DeGeneres' speech: getting rid of hardship and being real to yourself. ForDeGeneres, that implied pushing onward with her career after her sitcom was canceled in action to her openly coming out as gay.Really, when I look back on it, I would not alter a thing.

I indicate, it was so essential for me

to lose whatever because I learnt what the most essential thing is ... to be true to yourself

. Eventually, that's exactly what's gotten me to this place. I don't live in worry. I'm free. I have no tricks and I know I'll constantly be OKAY, since no matter what, I know who I am."7 )Will Smith: Speech from The Pursuit of Happyness(2006)Here's another speech from the cinema, this time from the 2006 movie The Pursuit of Happyness. In the scene above, Will Smith's character discusses to his boy why he should not pursue basketball (since

he'll end up being "below par")before having a significant change of heart.Don't ever let someone tell you ... you can't do something. Not even me. All right? You got a dream. You got ta protect it. Individuals can't do something themselves, they desire to inform you can't do it. If you want something, go get it. Duration."8 )Sheryl Sandberg: Harvard Business School Class Day Speech( 2012)In her

speech to the HBS class of 2012 , Lean In author and tech executive Sheryl Sandberg deconstructed the

concept of the" career as a ladder."For Sandberg, a career has to do with finding chances where you can make an impact, not about chasing titles and planning a precise course. "If I had actually drawn up my career when I was sitting where you are, I would have missed my profession,"she commented. Exactly what's more, Sandberg shuns the

standard wisdom of keeping feelings out of the office. For Sandberg, you have to care not only about exactly what you're working on, however likewise who you're working with."If you wish to win hearts and minds, you need to lead with your heart as well as your mind. I don't think we have a professional self from Mondays through Fridays and a real self for the

rest of the time ... It is all professional and it is all individual, all at the same time. "9)Dan Pink: "The Puzzle of Inspiration"( 2009)Commissions, benefits, other incentives ... in the business world, these are the things that inspire individuals? According to Dan Pink in his 2009 TED Talk, such extrinsic motivators(a.k.a."carrots and sticks ")could actually be doing more damage than great. The most recent sociological research suggests that the real key to producing better work is to find intrinsic motivation inside of yourself.There is a mismatch between exactly what science understands and what service does. And what concerns me, as we stand here in the rubble of the economic collapse, is that a lot of companies are making their choices, their policies about talent and people, based on assumptions that are outdated, unexamined, and rooted more in folklore than in science."10 )Denzel Washington: "Fall Forward "( 2011 )In his 2011 UPenn start speech, Denzel Washington highlighted three reasons why we require to accept failure in order to achieve success. Initially,

everybody will stop working at something at some time, so you much better get utilized to it. Second, if you never ever fail, take that as an indication that you're not truly attempting. And 3rd, at the end of the day, failure will assist you find out what course you wish to be on.Fall forward. Here's what I mean: Reggie Jackson struck out twenty-six-hundred times in his profession-- the most in the history of baseball. But you don't hear about the strikeouts. Individuals remember the house runs.

Fall forward. Thomas Edison conducted 1,000 stopped working experiments. Did you know that? I didn't understand that-- since # 1,001 was the light bulb. Fall forward. Every stopped working experiment is one step better to success."11)Sylvester Stallone: Speech from Rocky Balboa( 2006) I needed to put this one next considering that it plays along the same themes as Denzel Washington's UPenn speech. In the

scene above, from the 2006 film Rocky Balboa, the title character(played by Sylvester Stallone )is having a heart-to-heart with his boy. The guidance he gives him: Do not let your failures or the adversity you face sluggish you down. Keep. Moving. Forward.Let me tell you something you already know. The world ain't all sunlight and rainbows. It's an extremely mean and nasty location, and I do not care how tough you are, it will beat you to your knees and keep you there completely if you let it.

You, me, or no one is gon na strike as hard as life. However it ain't about how hard you strike. It has to do with how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward. How much you can take and keep moving forward. That's how winning is done!"12 )Elizabeth Gilbert:"Your Elusive Creative Genius "(2009 )Following the extraordinary success of her book, Eat, Pray, Love, people started asking author Elizabeth Gilbert the very same concern over and over and over: How are you going to top that? In her 2009 TED Talk,

Gilbert explores that question while also taking a look at how our ideas

of genius and creativity have actually moved over the generations. While when viewed as different entities or states of being that anybody might use, genius and imagination have actually progressively ended up being related to people. And according to Gilbert, that shift has actually been putting a growing number of pressure on artists, writers, and other creatives to produce great work.I think that allowing somebody, one mere person to believe that he or she resembles, the vessel, you know, like the font and the essence and the source of all magnificent, innovative, unknowable, everlasting secret is just a smidge excessive responsibility to place on one delicate, human psyche. It's like asking somebody to swallow the sun. It just completely warps and distorts egos, and it develops all these unmanageable expectations about efficiency. And I believe the pressure of that has actually been exterminating our artists for the last 500 years

."13 )Charlie Day: Merrimack College Start Speech(2014

)Best understood for his role in the comedy It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, actor Charlie Day had great deals of knowledge to share during the 2014 start speech at his alma mater, Merrimack College. Day explained to the audience how college degrees are inherently valueless, since you can't trade them in for cash. Rather, it's you, your effort, and the risks you take that supply real value in life.You can not let a worry of failure or a worry of comparison or a worry of judgment stop you from doing the things that will make you great. You can not be successful without the risk of failure. You can not have a voice without the danger of criticism. You can not like without the danger of loss.

You must take these threats."14)Frank Oz/Yoda: Speech from The Empire Strikes Back( 1980)This speech from The Empire Strikes Back felt like a natural follow-up to Charlie Day's speech. In the scene above, Yoda-- voiced by Frank Oz-- is teaching Luke the ways of the force. One of his crucial mentors: Whether or not something can or can't be done (e.g., lifting an X-Wing out of a swamp)is all in your head. So rather of doubting yourself, think in yourself."Do, or do not. There is no try." 15)William Wallace: Speech From the Battle of Stirling Bridge (1297)OK, I'll confess: I couldn't discover a recording of the actual speech Scottish flexibility fighter William Wallace provided at the Battle of Stirling Bridge in 1297( the historian I spoke with stated something about"nonexistent innovation "and me"being an idiot, "however I digress ). Historic accuracy aside, there's no rejecting that Mel Gibson's variation of the speech from the 1995 movie Braveheart can assist get you pumped up. "Aye, battle and you might die.

Run and you'll live-- a minimum of a while. And dying in your beds several years from now, would you be ready to trade all the days from this day to that for one opportunity, just one possibility to come back here and tell our enemies that they might take our lives, however they'll never take our flexibility!!! "16)Orlando Scampington:" The Pillars of C.L.A.M."

(2015)Sometimes humor is the very best motivator. So here's an INBOUND Vibrant Talk

fromself-proclaimed author, thought leader, dreamer, cat owner, visionary, and"follower in limitless human capacity, "Orlando Scampington. As you'll quickly realize upon checking out the quote below, it's difficult to describe exactly what his speech is in fact about-- so I believe it's much better that you simply dive in and take pleasure in. "Culture is the bitter inebriated coachmen lashing motivation into the ungrateful workhorses, so

they drag the wagon of growth down the road of success. I think that's a very accurate example."17 )Kurt Russell: "This is Your Time" (2004 )

The Wonder on Ice is still considered the most significant upset in Olympic hockey history. And for good factor. The Soviet Union won 6 of the last 7 Olympic gold medals, and the United States team consisted only of amateur gamers. It was apparent the Soviets were much better. But, in the motion picture Wonder, which told the fish story of the 1980 U.S. Olympic Hockey Team, Kurt Russell's character-- Coach Herb Brooks-- understood that this video game was various. The U.S. was much better than the Soviets that day. And his speech communicated such a strong belief in his group that they managed among the biggest sports minutes of the 20th century."If we played 'em 10 times, they might win 9. But not this game ... Not tonight. Tonight, we skate with them. Tonight, we stick with them.

And we shut them down since we can! Tonight, WE are the biggest hockey group on the planet.

You were born to be hockey gamers, each of you. And you were meant to be here tonight. This is your time."18 )Jim Valvano: ESPY Speech(1993 )Less than two months prior to he lost his battle to cancer, Jim Valvano provided among the most impactful and timeless speeches about living life to the maximum. My words can't do it justice, so be gotten ready for some laughter, tears, and thought."I just got one last thing; I urge all of you, all you, to enjoy your life, the precious minutes you have. To spend each day with some laughter and some idea, to obtain your emotions going.

To be passionate every day, and Ralph Waldo Emerson said,"

Absolutely nothing great might be accomplished without interest,"to keep your dreams alive in spite of issues whatever you have. The ability to be able to work hard for your dreams to come real, to become a truth."19 )Mel Gibson:"The Valley of the Shadow of Death"(2002)The film We Were Soldiers happens in one of the most racially charged decades in American history, however Lieutenant Colonel Hal Moore-- played by Mel Gibson-- provided such a rousing speech that it brought an extremely varied group of soldiers together as one system. He knew if his soldiers might set their differences aside, then they would form a true brotherhood, increasing their chances of survival as a whole. That method, the memories of their lost brothers might reside on forever when they returned home." I cannot guarantee that I will bring you all house alive.

This I swear before you and prior to Almighty God: that when we go into battle, I will be the very first to set foot on the field, and I will be the last to step off. And I will leave no one behind. Dead or alive, we will all come home together. So assist me God. "20 )Kal Penn: DePauw University Start Speech (2014 )In 2014, Kal Penn delivered an uplifting speech that DePauw University will never ever forget. He recommended graduates to aim for

success however to not let it loosen their grip on the things that actually matter, like remaining gotten in touch with liked ones, being adventurous, and acting selflessly. He also comforted millennials everywhere, convincing them that their futures are full of prospective and

pledge because their generation's identity is rooted in innovation."Chance is all around us. You're graduating at a time where youth unemployment is high. But your peers are refusing to sit idly by. You're the most active, service-driven generation, the most imaginative, the most tech-savvy. You're creating chances, developing gadgets, placing an emphasis on social responsibility over greed. So stop stressing a lot. Why are you stressed?"21 )Charles Dutton: Speech from Rudy(1993) In the film Rudy, Sean Astin's character, Rudy Ruettiger, gives up the Notre Dame football group since he has to watch among his last games from the stands. After 2 years of difficult practices and never ever as soon as being apart of the group on the sidelines, he's done handling the humiliation. His friend Fortune-- played by Charles Dutton-- flips the script on him. He reveals Rudy that he shouldn't be embarrassed. He should be happy since he's shown to everyone that his perseverance and heart can bring him through any difficulty. He simply has to realize that himself. And the only method he can do that is if he remains on the team for the remainder of the

season." You're 5 feet nothin ', a 100 and nothin', and you got barely a speck of athletic ability. And you awaited with the finest college football group in the land for two years. And you're also going to walk outta here with a degree from the University of Notre Dame. In this life time, you do not need to show

nothin' to no one-- except yourself. And after exactly what you have actually gone through, if you haven't done that by now, it ain't going to never ever take place. Now go on back."22)Vera Jones:"But the Blind Can Lead the Blind ... "(2016)Last year at INBOUND, Vera Jones informed a moving story about the life lessons she's gained from raising her blind child. She describes how having faith in your future and letting it lead you toward your real purpose will help you conquer blinding challenges. She also talks about how following your enthusiasm and trusting your vision establishes compassion, which is a vital management skill."Passionately play your position no matter how bad things get. You are considerable. Why we are here is not for our own magnificence. Eventually, we're here to lead and serve everybody else. By doing that, we encourage others to do the very same. "Seen other motivational speeches that should be on this list? Share them in the remarks section below!

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thetravelingmama · 7 years ago

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I answer some Mom Questions!

1. The worst thing your kids have done? Nothing yet. She’s too young.

2. What was your first reaction when finding out that you were pregnant? I honestly said “Oh shit!”, but in a good way.

3. What was your most common food craving, or most unusual craving? I never had cravings. I did made a thing about eating one hamburger a month, if that’s considered a craving, then so be it.

4. What is the hardest part about being pregnant? (Revised, previously wrote wrong answer) For me, it was the weeks before I got my Amniocentesis test. Since I was a high risk pregnancy, it was truly stressful for both of us. After that test was done and passed, it was smooth sailing from then on.

5. Where were you, what were you doing when you went into labor? At home, it was around 10pm and I was cuddling with my husband watching TV.

6. What was your labor experience? Natural, epidural, meds, c-section? How long were you in labor? I had an epidural - who the hell does not want that? I pushed my baby girl without a c-section. I think I was in labor around 4-6 hours.

7. Was it better or worse than you had anticipated? It was like I anticipated. At first the pain was bearable but at one point I lost my concentration and all hell broke loose. From that moment on I could not focus and the pain got hard core. The funny thing is that I would not change a thing, like having a doula with me. For me and what I wanted to gain from that experience, I wanted my family there. No one else, even if they could have helped me focus.

8. Did you have a good pregnancy? Why? Oh man, I could write a huge list. I never got crazy (angry/sad/hormonal) with anyone. Not one part of my body swelled up. I never had dangerous situations. I slept perfectly during all my pregnancy, never complained about back pain. Mia never woke me up with her kicking late at night. I loved getting dressed and putting on tight clothes that hugged my belly, I never wanted to hide it. I loved the way I looked.

9. What were your thoughts about labor? That all the women that told me horror stories do it just to scare the living shit out of others. It’s just a natural process, pain is normal and if you focus you might get out of it faster than you think. I also think that the women who complain or describe it in a bad way are the chicks who don’t handle pain well.

10. What advice would you give other women about pregnancy? Don’t read ONE book about pregnancy, specially books that describe things like “What to expect...” Just let it flow and you’ll see that you never needed it.

11. Have you ever thought gosh I cant do this, and why? Hundreds of times. Most of all, it happened when sleep deprivation started. But that feeling never really leaves you, it’s always there. The great thing is that you find yourself actually doing stuff you didn’t think you could do. It’s very rewarding.

12. What are your views on young Mothers having children? There’s the side of being young that makes you be with your child through maybe a huge part of their lives, something that fortysomething Moms cannot do. You will definitively be there for most of their lives. Then, there’s the side of getting to live certain things on your own until the right moment comes to evolve into something else. I chose the latter. I would love for Mia to explore the world, to live a life on her own first, to get to live different relationships until she finds the right person to have a child.

13. Did you go through the baby blues or postpartum depression? How did this effect you? Yes, PPD. It was horrible - and sometimes still is. It never really leaves you, it props its ugly head up from time to time. The good thing is now I know when it’s coming and I go to my doctor to get help as soon as possible so that it doesn’t linger. For me, PPD made me feel like a bad mother, a bad wife. I felt like I had made a mistake millions of times - but I felt conflicted because I loved my child. It took a while to understand that it was a mix of hormonal imbalance and lack of sleep that triggered it... and that with help I could snap out of it.

14. What techniques did you use to get through the pain of contractions? For the time that I could handle them, all I did was focus on how the pain was going to come in waves and that I needed to breathe through it. The one second I forgot to focus and breathe, game over.

15. What were your first thoughts when you saw your baby? For me, it was a total shock. I sat there and thought “and what do I do now?” Yes, not all women feel all wonderful and full of joy when they give birth for the first time. I would even bet that most women go through the same thing that I experienced - but they say the “wonderful story” about falling in love and yada, yada, yada because they are afraid to be honest. You do experience true love and you do fall in love with your child. Not all women experience the same thing.

16. What is and how did you choose your baby's name? We chose Mia because of one of our favorite characters, Mia Wallace. I think she’s the coolest chick ever. I also wanted a easy name for her - instead of my name, which is just complicated.

17. What's the hardest thing about being a Mom? Many things. You lose a lot of yourself, you sacrifice a lot, sometimes more than you should. You are also expected to handle everything while in reality, you just need help and lots of it. You feel extremely lonely at some points, or maybe that you don’t have anyone to rely on other than your partner. People expect you to stop doing things you loved only because you are a Mom, and if you try to do any of those things, you’re judged. We also worry a lot more than others - but it’s normal, we’re doing our job.

18. Write something she has done to make you laugh. On Friday my kid and I had the following exchange, verbatim...

Mia: Mom? Me: Yeah? Mia: (she looks at me with a devilish grin) Oh Shit!

I started laughing and tried to tell her that she could not say that but my giggles did not help at all.

19. What's baby's favorite toy? It’s not a toy, more sort of a blankie. It’s a pink bunny that she calls “Coneji”. We travel with it, she goes to daycare or anywhere else with it. I have five of them, just in case one is lost. That bunny saves lives, trust me.

20. Biggest worry about your baby's future? For now, I don’t worry at all about her future. I do get sad because I know that I will not be there for her when she is my age. It is what it is.

21. What is the best part about being a Mom? Everything. Just looking at her is amazing. Hearing her laugh. Seeing her grow and learn. Watching her evolve, develop her character. Getting hugs or kisses. Seeing her with her dad. I can go on and on.

22. Do you believe in staying home or going to work? 100% going to work. I spent the first six months at home and decided that it was NOT for me at all. I need to earn my keep, I’ve never been comfortable with not contributing financially in a relationship.

23. What is the one thing you never had that you want for your kids? A relationship with her Dad that lasts a lifetime. I honestly sometimes wonder how different would I be if I would have had that experience. A couple of months ago I thought that I would give it a chance with my own Dad... but then I knew that it was going to be a waste of time and went on with my life.

24. What is your biggest fear as a Mother? Right now, I don’t fear anything. Even when I know I will not be there when she is older, I just know she will be ok.

25. Any advice for future Moms? Don’t read motherhood books. Don’t ask for advice and ignore whatever comes your way, specially if you didn’t ask for it. People will judge you for everything you do, so screw them. Listen to your gut, always. If you have a problem, research it. Get an amazing babysitter and pay her extremely well: she will be your best friend and the one person you can count on when you need to enjoy life outside your home. Let your husband be the Dad he wants to be, even if he does things that you would not do.

26. Anyone special you'd like to thank for helping you through parenthood? My babysitter. She encouraged me to not be scared of change, taught me that all children adapt. She taught me that I needed to let my child be so that she learned from her mistakes, that I did not need to save her 24/7. At first I was a very nervous Mom and she fixed that straight away. I’m now more carefree because of her.

27. What is your biggest pet peeve about being a parent? Although I stopped drinking a lot, I do miss knowing that I could go out and get drunk without having to get up early in the morning. Hangovers and an energetic kid who wants to play in the morning do not mix at all.

28. What is something you miss about the life before your kids? Two things: not having to announce that I was leaving the house (or plan it); the silence of us two. Although right now we’re not traveling as much, I’m not so worried about it. I traveled a lot since I was 4 or 5 years old, so it’s just a matter of time until we’re all on a plane going somewhere really far and awesome. Besides, I’d rather wait until the 2020 elections to see if this world gets a break from all the bad things that are happening - and I get to feel safe enough to travel again.

29. Any regrets or mistakes learned from? My mistake was having a lot of expectations about a lot of things that did not end up happening. It is still sometimes hard for me to understand that, but I’m doing much better.

30. What’s changed the most about you after being a Mom? I started seeing people for what they really are. I stopped caring about insignificant things. I stopped caring about what other people thought of me. I started believing in myself more.

31. Was your husband/partner a help or hindrance during the first few weeks after giving birth? He was my everything. He stayed with me during almost 4 months, which is impossible for many Dads out there because they have to get back to work. Since we own our business, we can work from anywhere we want to, so he was here with me at home, sharing the load.

32. What is the best thing about having a child? Besides the laughter, cuddles, kisses and hugs? Beside the all consuming love? Looking at her knowing that I will leave a small imprint of myself in her, so that I never leave her. That at the end of the day, I will have done my best to give her all that I could, all that I didn’t have; just to make her a decent, good human being. That my story continues, long after I’m gone, because I’m somewhere in her. It might be her character, it might be her smile, her laugh, the way she approaches things, the way she handles herself. That by having a child you make your life not only about you. That, while you sacrifice maybe more than you thought you would, you know it’s because at the end it will be totally worth it.

That while you sometimes feel alone or lost because you are exhausted or don’t know at times what to do... life has given you a partner, someone that will accompany you until your last breath. Someone that is there so that you strive to be better. Someone that does not let you settle. Having a child also binds you with someone, for good or bad. Marriage, for me, has always been a relative term. Being a parent is not. Parenting IS the thing that truly makes two people get connected, for better or worse. Parenting is more than a paper you sign. It’s a compromise, from both parts, that you will never abandon them, that you will be there for them always, when they truly need you or even when they think they don’t. Having a child is a promise of love and care. Some break that promise. Some leave. Some abandon you when you most need them. I’m lucky that it happened with someone I trust, admire, respect. Someone that I know will be an amazing father. Who will always be there, who will always care, that will be present, not only when it’s convenient or when they have time. A true father figure, something that for me is amazing to witness.

Having a child is experiencing love and dedication at its finest.

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bangyourheadnotyourheart · 8 years ago

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LION: My Movie Review

Sniff. Sniff.

While I do have colds, been sick for days now, but my sniveling was caused by watching Lion. This is a movie review and since I don’t really know how to make a review, I may end up summarizing the film instead. It is also kind of long. So, fair warning, spoilers ahead. But please, you need to see the movie. It’s moving, heartbreaking, it’s touching.

How I come across this movie: it’s Oscars season once again and there will be a lot of great films. First on my list is Hacksaw Ridge and I was supposed to watch it this weekend instead of Lion because come on, it’s Andrew Garfield and it’s based on a true story. Though I’m not quite a fan of war movies, I made an exception for Hacksaw Ridge because once I saw the trailer, I was hooked. But how come I watched Lion instead? Again, I planned to watch Hacksaw Ridge this weekend but during the week, while I was browsing instagram, I come across a picture of Viola Davis hugging a child named Sunny Pawar, the star of Lion. So I got curious and looked at the trailer for Lion. And I was a goner. It’s also based on a true story. I’m such a sucker for movies based on true stories. So I made it my weekend watch. I searched the web about interviews, behind the scenes, footages... I was so excited to watch it. There were warnings that tissues should be brought when watching because there will be sure crying. And they were right. I’m still wiping my tears as I am typing this.

So the movie: where do I begin? And what is it with stories of India? 3 Idiots, Like Stars on Earth and now this... all films touched my heart. Maybe because their plight is much similar to ours, their problems are like ours too. Maybe that made them more relatable for me.

So the movie begins with two young brothers - Guddu, the older one and Saroo, the younger one - stealing coals from a moving train, just so they could exchange it for two packets of milk. While waiting for the milk, Saroo asked Guddu if he could buy a jalebi - a fried street food. (I just had to type this because when they pronounced jalebi, it sounded very Jollibee to me - anyways). Guddu looked over. They only have the two packets of milk and nothing more. Guddu promised to buy a lot of jalebis for him. Saroo added that they would buy the whole shop. After that, the brothers happily returned home, dodging the questions of their mother about where they got the milk. The family was poor, with only the milk to share. Saroo offered some to his mother, but she shook her head. That scene for me, it showed how their family loved each other and will do anything for each other.

Guddu, being the eldest, has to go to work. Saroo wants to help in earning but Guddu refuses to bring him because he was small. But Saroo proved to his brother that though he was small, he could handle heavy lifting. What I loved about Saroo is that though he is very young, just five years old, he already knew that he has to help his family. This just tugs my heart. It’s so cruel that a child so young knowing these things. Kids at his age don’t have to even think of this. But he’s seen how hard his mother had worked, he’s seen how much his brother had done for them, so he must also helped. (And Sunny Pawar, watching all his scenes just made me want to hug him real tight).

Then we got to the ill-fated night when the brothers where separated. Guddu left the sleepy Saroo on a bench in a train station so he could ask about his brother working with him. He told Saroo to stay and wait for him. So Saroo stayed and waited but Guddu never returned.

That night was very tragic for Saroo’s family. It wasn’t just him who was lost that night (later on the film, towards the end, you’ll know why that night was so tragic).

In searching for his brother, Saroo got on a train and was trapped while it traveled miles and miles away from his home. He was alone. He was hungry. He was scared. He’d been on the train for several days. The train ended in Calcutta where they don’t speak his language (Saroo speakes Hindi while Bengali is used in Calcutta). He can’t read and write. None of his family can. He was lost more than ever. He was still screaming his brother’s.

I just feel for the young Saroo. And it is so scary in the eyes of a lost child how the world could be so cold and vast. He was almost got caught by, I don’t know who were they but they seemed like either human traffickers or those people making children begged on the street. He escaped and was temporarily rescued by a woman. I was relieved at first but that woman also had another motive. I was so happy that Saroo is such a smart and sharp kid that he knows that there is danger. So he ran away. I’m amazed by the way of how many running scenes the young Saroo did in this film.

He was brought up in the orphanage and was adopted into an Australian family. Even in the end, he never stopped asking for his mum. He never stopped asking the adults if they really searched for her.

Twenty-five years later, Saroo was starting another milestone in his life (college in Melbourne, he’s living in Tasmania), away from his loving foster family. While having a great time with his friends (some were Indians), he saw a dish of jalebi. He was drawn to it (as I was) and memories started to resurface.

It consumed him. He was obsessed at finding his family. He was always thinking about the family he lost and all the while he was slowly losing the family he already have. I get why Saroo never told his foster mom that he was looking for his family. He didn’t want to sound ungrateful. He was healthy. He lived at ease. He should be thankful. But he was still lost. He was still that little lost boy wandering in the streets of India. He was consumed by guilt. He kept seeing his brother anywhere. He knew that he could never live his life in peace knowing that his real family might be out there, still searching for him, his brother still calling his name, his mother still waiting for him to come home.

It was his willingness to help his family that made him lost that night. But it was the love and memory of them that paved his way back home, and of course Google Earth. I don’t know how to describe my feelings during that scene when Saroo found his home through Google Earth. He remembered the pattern of rocks where his mother worked and that was his starting point. I loved how that while Saroo was checking Google Earth there were also flashbacks of young Saroo as he was walking those streets. Tears fell (Saroo’s and mine) when he found his home. And the reason why he couldn’t find his home was because he was saying it wrong all along.

So finally told his foster mother what he’s been up to and she was accepting and hoped that he will meet his real mother. So to India he went.

I just had to admire Dev Patel in the last part of the movie where he retraced his steps. His character Saroo had never set foot there for twenty-five years but he was walking the streets from his memory. There was joy, melancholy and anticipation. And Dev Patel nailed it.

Saroo found his home but it was no more. He was frustrated. He found someone who could speak English and told him who he was. I thought at first that the man he talked to just left him but he was leading Saroo to where his mother was.

And with that. Isn’t a mother’s love amazing? She immediately recognized her son the moment she saw Saroo. She hugged him tight, kept calling his name and kept turning to the people around them to show them that her Saroo finally came home. In this moment, I didn’t hold back the tears. Their joy, longing and relief was so real. Though their reunion was mixed with grief when Saroo learned that his brother Guddu died that same night he got lost. The reason Guddu never returned that night was because he got hit by a train.

So the little boy finally made it home. And I love their final shot. It was of adult Saroo, walking in the train tracks. Guddu was there, finally smiling and calling him. Then we see again the young brothers, joyfully playing in the afternoon.

They showed an actual clip of Saroo’s real mother meeting his foster mom. It was another cry fest.

Wait. Let me get my bearing because I still can’t stop crying.

Everyone should watch this film. Especially if you needed a good cry. All the cast were amazing here. Sunny Pawar was a star. Dev Patel, gosh, I love you even more. And Nicole Kidman, wow. Her scenes were only little but they were powerful. And it helps to know that this film is working with organizations in helping the lost children in India.

Shall I recommend this: This movie is one of those which will stick with you for a long time. This is just one great story. Of course, I will recommend it.

Will I watch it again: yes. A million jalebis yes.

Fun fact: You will find at the end of the film why this movie is called ‘Lion’.

#lion movie dev patel sunny pawar nicole kidman spoilers saroo guddu

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