#gosh i hope this makes sense. not sure how to phrase this

[skylightlover]

bonus question: is your f/o exactly the same as usual, or do you imagine them slightly different to fit our world (if they don’t already)

[feroluce]

Oh my gosh the way the Pop-Up Shop event ended and what it hinted at that's going on rn, and what it might imply about what's in store for the next time we see Sampo, I'm so excited AAAAAAA

Because it seems it really IS our Sampo, and whereas before I was absolutely delighted by the thought that he was possibly getting fucked with by some outside influence, and that was why he was saying such strange things... There's nothing quite like that going on here. There's no memetic virus messing with his head. There's no imposter, no possession, no nothing.

Just Sampo, and the ominous, all-consuming dread that hangs over his head like a guillotine, as he willingly walks right into what he is sure is a trap. ♡

Because this event was weird right off the bat, yeah? Sampo invites us in on a business deal that won't make him any money? The hell???

And I was just waiting on pins and needles for it to make sense, and oh, I was not disappointed at all. Because I've got a nice meta post about it over here, but Sampo actually DOESN'T make a lot of money most of the time- but he does always get something out of his dealings. He works for favors and good will and networking, but never for nothing. And it was the same here!

Sampo didn't make any money with this little business venture because that wasn't what he needed from it. That was never his goal to begin with. He just needed something entertaining.

Sampo has the key to get into the tavern's basement where Sparkle has been keeping his mask for him, but he still needs to be let into the front door of the tavern itself. The fun stories he got from this event were his entry fee. He leaves at the end because he's probably already on his way to Epsilon, where the World's End Tavern should be.

So that explains part of what was so strange this event. It's the rest of his ooc tendencies that have me like foaming at the mouth though because AAAAAAAAAA

There's long been hints of...some? kind of strain between Sampo and the rest of the Masked Fools. Like it starts all the way back in Belobog's main quest with the big infamous fourth-wall breaking sequence, where Sampo talks some shit.

And it continues in the Aetherium Wars event, where we finally get the confirmation that Sampo is a Masked Fool and even get to see him interact with Giovanni, one of his brethren! And where Sampo talks more shit. He also leaves the trailblazer a warning against Sparkle, who they hadn't met yet, and probably the Masked Fools in general.

And for some strange reason, it seems to be popular fanon that Sampo like. Talks a lot of shit? Or is rude in general? Like I feel like I see a lot of jokes about if Hook says a cuss word, it was probably his fault. But Sampo is actually pretty polite with everyone. I think the only time we really see him be harsh is when he has to set some hard boundaries in the museum event. Otherwise, he conducts himself like a model friendly businessman. Like he IS super shady and slimy, but he's still polite about it. I'm pretty sure the only time he actually talks any shit, and so bluntly, is about the Masked Fools or Epsilon as a whole. He really seems to have some sort of beef with them.

There's also his hilarious relationship with Sparkle, which I'm including for consideration because we don't know how common people like her are in the Masked Fools, so she might represent how Sampo interacts with a lot of them. ...But I'm pretty sure Sampo's grudge with her runs deeper than that anyway jdksajfdkljas

She's so funny I hope she fucks with him more FJDKSJAKD

Anyway, the point is, Sampo doesn't seem to see eye-to-eye with a lot of the rest of Aha's followers. And it was never hinted at before the pop-up shop event, but now I'm wondering if it might be like. An actual dangerous sort of situation.

Because during those brief packaging sequences, you get some. Pretty wild text dropped on you. There was actually a really cool explanation for it by another user already! But basically, all of the phrases are more fourth-wall breakage. They're mostly in-game achievements...except for one.

"This must be a trap create"

We never get to see the rest of the phrase. Just "This must be a trap create."

That is the only one we don't have an explanation for yet, at least as far as I know.

AN EDIT: Thank you to @/kittaykattz for this one, because it looks like someone DID find the source of this line. Unfortunately, it only came up in my search after I looked for the full phrase. I couldn't find it on the wiki before orz And yet this somehow does NOT make it any less ominous ajfdklsjkl The full phrase is "This must be a trap created by a Masked Fool!" and it comes from another in-game achievement, "Boxes and Ladders." Which is really cool, because I had figured the last line must be something from Penacony, since it was the only area not represented so far. So in that way, it fits perfectly with the rest of the text. Now we have one achievement from every area of the game, which fits with the theme that Sampo has been following the Astral Express, the trailblazer specifically. It's the way that it doesn't fit that's the weird part though. Because the rest of the lines that come from in-game achievements are all titles; that's why they were so much easier to find. For some reason, Hoyo saw fit to single this one out. They didn't use a title. They specifically chose the line about falling into a trap set by a Masked Fool, a trap with seemingly no way out, where one's only choice is to take a leap of faith and pray to make it out ok in the end.

Love that. Absolutely love that. That's so fucking tasty, I will be daydreaming for days on end now about Sampo finding himself in a horrible situation with no way out where all he can do is make a desperate attempt and pray to whatever might listen (probably not Aha fjaksljdk) that he'll survive it WHEEEEEE

Because Sampo talks so strangely throughout the whole event, but it gets worse day by day, morose and morbid and dreading and sometimes even almost like he's warning the trailblazer against something about to happen.

I've already lovingly discussed it in an analysis about Sampo's name (alias included) but like. There certainly are some fun connections there. The Sampo of myth was smashed and lost to the sea. Poisson was flooded. Brueghel died suddenly and left a final painting of a storm at sea unfinished.

The Masked Fools are referred to with imagery of water and the sea. And frequently so.

And so I do wonder what Sampo knows, and what he's expecting to happen when he gets to that tavern at the end of the world. If maybe he thinks he's walking right into a trap, and is doing it willingly, doing it anyway, because, well.

Belobog is on the line.

And Sampo has already proven he seems so ready to do whatever it takes to protect it.

[taeaura]

Your the only person on this app I've really seen actually understand Thomas, and the Hewitt's family the best. Very gay question i have, how would the Hewitt's react to Thomas having feelings for a man and or think about dating a man (probably didn't phrase that correctly but oh well.) Like all the stories people make, i know it'd probably be like some schnazz where Thomas falls for the victim or whatever, but how'd the family react to that victim being a man (if Thomas would even like a men.)

First of all, thank you!! I try. Second, this is a wonderful question! I'll try my best to answer it 🫀

TW: Homophobic/Transphobic statements {Tommy's a sweetheart, dw}

How the Hewitts Would React to Thomas' Partner Being a Man

Slurs. Slur after slur after slur - From Monty and Hoyt of course. And really invasive/inconsiderate statements:

"Well, at least someone learned to love your ugly mug..even if it's a man."

"So..who's the bottom/top?" - "You ain't taking it in the ass, are ya, Thomas?"

"Well Momma, guess you ain't getting any grandchildren, huh?"

"Tommy..are you sure you're not confused? I know a few gals who could change yer mind."

--

Thomas {and his future/current partner} will have the best luck with Luda Mae. This Southern Christian woman lives by the Bible {with exceptions..} - But she loves her son to the Heavens. She'll be disappointed, but not because Thomas is gay. She just wanted grandchildren. She'd be disappointed to find out her daughter-in-law was infertile, too. She'd be a bit confused, but she loves Thomas {and his partner} nonetheless. Be prepared for a minor spiral though:

"Thomas, hun, you might just be confused; It's alright. There's plenty of women who'll want you, just you wait."

Thomas..are you sure? Women can be just as if not better, y'know."

"I don't understand..is it something I did wrong?" - She'd be scared she raised Thomas wrong, I feel.

It'll take time for her to get used to, but she'll never insult or belittle Thomas nor his partner. And she'll get his uncles to stop, too.

--

Luda would invite Kathryn {The Tea Lady} over to "destress" {aka, spilling both her and Thomas' guts.}

"Oh you wont believe what Thomas told me today- It's..it's not too good."

"Well, what is it? You look a bit tense, it's best to get it off your shoulders."

She sighs. "Thomas told me he's 'gay'..."

"What?"

"A homosexual, Kathryn."

"Well..well that just doesn't make any sense; He just hasn't met the right woman yet!"

"That's what I told him!"

"It'll be alright. He's..he's confused, that's all. Ain't thinking straight."

"I know!" - "I just..I hope it wasn't something I did."

"Oh, nonsense, Luda. He's confused, just as he was when he started putting them animal skins on his face. It'll go away eventually."

But the animal skins never left - They only progressed {do you see the point I'm trying to make? 😉}

--

If you happened to be a trans man/trans masc, prepare for even more madness from all family members..

Thomas wouldn't love you any less, it's the family who'd give you issues.

"Oh, so it's a woman then?"

"Right...so a lady playing dress-up as a guy."

"Well, at least you're still getting some pussy; Huh, Tommy?"

"Great..two misguided freaks..how fun"

"Gosh, it's one thing to be gay, but you couldn't even get a real man, Tommy?"

And Luda Mae would bug Thomas and his partner even MORE about grandchildren..good luck.

As time progresses, his family will become quieter better. They'll keep comments to themselves and won't pry too deep :)

--

As Thomas' partner, - and I know this is a lot to ask of someone - you'll have to reassure him constantly. He truly thinks something is wrong with him from the way he looks, to the way he acts, and now to who he's attracted to. He loves his partner very much; He's attracted not only to their body, but to their mind - their soul. He lives a very sheltered life; So it's up to you {assuming you're his partner} to introduce him to certain aspects of life :)

How exciting...

He'll always affirm you in ways he can - He doesn't really view you as his "male" partner. His "trans" partner. His "Cis" partner. He doesn't give a fuck anyway. He just views you as his partner; Who happens to be a man. Who happens to be trans/cis. Even then, he's not really focused on that - He just likes looking at you; Especially your eyes. He feels connected to you, like soul ties.

Be patient with him, and he'll be patient with you - That includes shielding you from his family 🫀

____ Guys I hope I worded this right 😭🙏 Thomas does not discriminate but his family does

Please please please tell me if I worded something wrong or accidentally said something inconsiderate, love you all

[my-autism-adhd-blog]

I've always hated euphemisms and I'm wondering if that's an autism thing. It feels like it is. I feel like they don't actually change the weight of the conversation and they just add an extra step in me understanding what someone's talking about. Like I've been on this world long enough to know the phrase "passed on" but no matter what every time I hear it my thoughts process is gonna be "passed on what? like passed on a turn? Oh they mean he died!". Nothing about that makes the conversation easier, it just adds more delay between me hearing something and me coming up with the right reaction, and then I'm risking coming across as cold and insensitive. And the thought in my head is still that the person is dead now, same as it would be if you just said that. It's annoying and I really don't get why people use these.

Hi there,

I can get where you’re coming from. Kinda like how some say “dangit” instead of “dammit” or “gosh” instead of “god”.

Some people just chose to speak that way. Maybe to make the conversation easier to talk about? Since the topic of someone dying can be hard to discuss if you just state “the person died” point blank. It’s easier to state that they have “passed on” before getting more into the topic.

But these are just my thoughts as I write this, so I may be misunderstanding the entire thing. I’m not sure if it’s a neurodivergent thing or not, but I think both NT and ND individual can get annoyed with these.

My main point here is that sometimes people can find things like death hard to talk about. So certain phrases are used to ease the conversation a bit. Like saying “they passed on” instead of just saying “they’re dead”. That’s too direct and blunt for some people.

Maybe my followers can help with this because I have no idea if what I’m saying to making any sense.

Anyway, I appreciate the inbox. I hope you have a wonderful day/night. ♥️

[generalluxun]

Looking at the episode listings now & Season 3 just gets more tragic, cos from Chloe's perspective its like this:

Mums back, but still hates me (Killed me) but hey I can be a super hero cos destiny, chance, choice whatever!

Oh no, I messed up being a super hero, was humiliated before everyone and... Well at least mom seems to like me now?

Followed with, well everyone hates me and I'm useless I might as well leave, oh gosh Ladybug thinks I can be good and useful & chose me!

Capped off with, I helped Ladybug and the rest of the team battle an army of Akuma, we almost defeated Hawk Moth and even had a team photo!

Like, yes I know you know all this, sorry, but like...

From her perspective at the end of season 2, she had zero reason to think she was not on the team.

Then its months of radio silence, rejections and battles at her door.

Still, she tries at times, like with Star Train, even if no one takes her seriously.

Then she's targeted by the villains & almost manages to defeat Hawk Moths second in command but is told she can't be hero anymore.

Followed very shortly afterwards by her parents declaring she only loves herself, attacking her and Ladybug choosing the only other hero with a known identity & then Hawk Moth ambushing her.

Again you know this, but it really does just emphasize the tragedy to me.

Now,

I am sure there will be someone who will go, "She's not owed a Miraculous" and sure, but frankly no one is owed super powers. Or, "Marinette is not obligated to help improve a girl who is always awful to her." Again, fair in concept, but here's the issue.

As I noted elsewhere, she already was chosen to use a Miraculous several times, as in sequentially there were no massive gaps that would give her the impression this would be a rare or one off thing.

Thing is, as only Ladybug is making these calls & chose her each time despite their history it is Ladybug's job to tell her that it was never going to last. Or at least order someone else too, or to have opted against choosing her again in the first place.

& as for Marinette, well again, she wasn't obliged to try and fix the family situation but she chose too. We can argue about whether it was in character to try, or the method she picked was out of character.

But within the context of the story, she did opt to insert herself into the this situation. It feels disingenuous to then turn around and say she can just divorce herself from it. If nothing else, she should maybe like... Tell an adult?

Like, its for sure a messy situation.

I'm not blaming Marinette for how messy it became but I do think its fair to note how this would look from Chloe's perspective without Marinette or our audience context. IE, her beloved idol who she's given adoration & obedience told her she could be a good & useful hero; then dropped her for months, & seemingly lied about why.

I also think its fair to note that regardless of whether it was the personally logical or morally right choice, Marinette did choose to involve herself of her own accord. Even suggesting involving Chloe could make her a better person! So people acting as though she's, at the very least, not involved at all is just feels disingenuous ya now?

The Season 3 finalé sets up so much for the folks who believe S4/5 was a retcon as opposed to plan. I don't think it was a retcon, but I DO believe it was a betrayal of the narrative before that point.

The S3 Finalé frames Chloé's fall *explicitly* as a tragedy. Fu uses the phrase 'Some lose hope' to describe her situation. Losing hope isn't an act of evil, it's an act of desperation and defeat. In a greater sense it is also framed as a failure of *Ladybug*.

Because no matter what people want to say about Marinette's duty to hep, *Ladybug* does have duties and responsibilities. On her watch a child was isolated and broken down over several episodes by Hawkmoth and Mayura. Season 3 starts the pattern of Ladybug failing with every Finale *Which is a very weird story to write!*

Now, the S3 Finalé would have worked as a low-point/mistake for LB to circle back to and address shortly after. Have her find out about Hawkmoth/Mayura's manipulation, about Queen Bee confronting Mayura and rejecting her. About her rejecting an akuma before anyone else. Have Marinette discover that things are not what they appeared on the surface (come on this is a classic theme for superheros!) and institute a process of mending fences. Ladybug grows from the experience, Chloé clearly will have growing to do too. In the end though the abused child is heard, and healing/help is given.

Instead they just went with 'nah ignore all the setup, Chloé is just evil, always has been, she is actually the abuser not her parents, and she deserves it.' (A statement Thomas wrote into S5E23 which was removed in production without his knowledge)

So yeah, no wonder people think it was a retcon. There's no world where the reality makes sense.

[attorneytrash]

I really really really love Such Terrible Tales, it's one of my favorite fanfictions of all time!! I was wondering how you write a "period piece" so well with all the terminology, dialog, and flow of the work feeling so reminiscent of 19th-20th century novels! (It still has its roots and humor in the modern era, but you get me.) Do you do a lot of research and editing before you publish a chapter or does it just flow naturally for you? Did you read a ton of Jane Austen and bodice rippers before penning the Jackdaw? Have you you plotted out Such Terrible Tales in full before writing or do you just fly by the seat of your pants (or do you do a mix of both)? Sorry if this is nosy, I'm just so curious and invested and I'm looking into writing fanfictions that captures a similar feeling myself ^q^

OH MY GOSH HIIIIIIII wait i've never gotten one of these before. this is so exciting. fair warning my advice will be terrible but you did ask

first off thank you I can't believe you think i write a good "period piece" (what is the period? we just don't know) because I feel like i'm so slapdash about it and it's all Vibes. ANYWAY I'M REALLY REALLY HAPPY YOU'RE ENJOYING THE FIC. TRULY

genuinely one of the reasons I started writing STT in the first place was because I was on a kick of reading stuff that takes place in that general era (again, what the actual era is remains unclear). A few people have pointed out the Jane Austen of it all, and I think when I was in the middle of reading an austen novel you can tell because of the language in those chapters. basically, I don't know if this is true of everyone, but I tend to lean into the style of whatever I'm reading at the time. I also think it helps, if you like audiobooks, to listen to audiobooks in the style you want to write in! Especially with older works, audiobook narrators are really good at getting the flow and cadence of the language across, and it helps get your mind flowing along and sort of "hooked in" to that style. or it does for me at least!

ALSO I do jot down a lot of notes, specifically little turns of phrase that I like! so for example, I wrote down to use the word "directly" meaning "right now" (as in, "I will read you the letter directly") and "presently" meaning "in a short time" (as in, "we're expecting his arrival presently"). Little things like moving words around too ("what have you there" rather than "what do you have there" etc) give it that sort of feel. if that makes sense. i just take a lot of notes

One tip I will give is that a little really goes a long way with old-timey language. I notice it less when listening to the audiobooks, but in older books the sentences are LOOOOOOOONG which is what makes them so hard to parse sometimes. And often in romance novels that take place in victorian or regency era they'll overdo the language to the point that it makes you roll your eyes (though I'm sure I've done that once or twice too)

ANYWAY I'M PRATTLING ON SORRY as for the plotting. I have a bare-bones skeleton that has all the larger plot twists in it, so I can make sure to foreshadow things. That being said, I think part of what's fun about a serial fic is coming up with things as you go while still having to stay true to what you've already written. One thing I will say is that it's EXTREMELY helpful to keep a couple cheat sheets: one is a timeline, which keeps track of all the events that happened in the past, when they happened, etc. The other is a list keeping track of what every character knows and when they find it out. It's saved me many times when I've forgotten who's aware of what secrets etc.

YOU'RE NOT NOSY AT ALL and in fact I'm seriously thrilled to get an ask like this bc i could talk about writing for days. I hope your fic goes well and that you have fun with it ^^

[quicksilverdrabbles]

Taliesin: I must say, you've a very good nose for finding injured people, Inigo.

Inigo: Thank you. They are just up this hill.

Kaidan: Peak's Shade?

Lucien: Oh dear, I hope S'vashni hasn't killed anybody again..

Xelzaz: No, this one is still alive.

Inigo: There they are!

Gore: *sitting on the ground with his leg caught in a bear trap*

Lucien: Oh gosh. I suppose asking if you're okay wouldn't be very helpful here.

Gore: N-Not really- *sees Morana standing near the front of the group* Uh.

Morana: *sighs, shaking her head. She pulls out her notebook and begins writing in it, showing the finished phrase to Gore* Hello, my name is Morana. No I am not here to kill you or lead you to your death. *she tilts her head, considering, before turning the notebook back towards her and adding more* Or enslave you.

Gore: You- What? I mean, the killing or leading me to my death I would have believed, but where did enslavement come from?

Morana: *points at Yaksha* That one.

Yaksha: Haha. She saved me from a slaver.

Gore: That.. makes more sense. But, if you're not here to kill me, then... *he stares at the group, confused. His gaze finds Taliesin, and his expression falls into a glare* You're here to imprison me. You're with the Thalmor.

Taliesin: What.

Morana: *waving her hands frantically* No, we're not. *turns to Taliesin* I told you to stop wearing those robes!

Taliesin: Well I don't have anything else to wear!

Morana: I just bought you new Vagrant robes!

Taliesin: When???

Morana: Like a week ago! I told you about them!

Gore: What is happening.

Lucien: Ah, Morana can't speak very well, so she uses sign language. Me, Taliesin and Yaksha can understand her, and the others are learning.

Kaidan: *speaking over Taliesin's arguing* Anyways, Taliesin won't imprison you or anything. If he were still a Thalmor Justiciar he wouldn't be alive right now. I'd have made sure of it.

Inigo: Yes, do not worry.

Gore: ... Right. I suppose I'll believe it for now.. Um. *he winces* Can you guys- just get me out of this thing?

Kaidan: Oh shit I forgot about that- Yeah, we'll get you out. Yaksha!

Yaksha: Right here. Please bite down on this while we get your leg free. *hands him a leather strip*

Gore: Thanks..

Morana: *looks over at Gore's muffled yelling* Oh, you got him free.

Xelzaz: *sigh* No thanks to you!

Taliesin: Don't you look away from me, I am still talking to you!

Morana: *shakes her head*

Taliesin: Don't roll your eyes at me!

Morana: I wasn't even looking at you!

Yaksha: *checking for broken bones and applying healing salve to Gore's wound* How does that feel? Better?

Gore: Very much so. Thank you, er..

Yaksha: Yaksha. And that's Kaidan, Lucien, Inigo, Xelzaz, Taliesin, Styx, and Morana.

Gore: Quite a crowd you all have. Cute nightmare dog.

Lucien: Isn't she?

Styx: *barks*

Taliesin: *still rambling* It's not as if it is my fault the Thalmor hunt anyone suspicious! Of course people like Kaidan are going to be targeted if they stand out enough!

Morana: You're really not helping your case here.

Gore: Er, my name's Gore.

Inigo: Gore? That is quite a strange name.

Gore: It's a long story. Any chance we could talk about it back in town?

Lucien: Oh yes- Yes of course! Is he well enough to stand yet, Yaksha?

Yaksha: I am unsure. If need be, I can carry him.

Gore: I don't think that'll be necessary, big guy.

Morana: *still arguing* For claiming to know so much about fashion, you're certainly attached to those ugly robes.

Taliesin: UGLY?! Why you-!

Morana: *perks up, hearing twigs snapping at the bottom of the hill* Wait shut up.

Taliesin: You dare tell me to-?!

Morana: I said shut up!

Inigo: You heard it too?

Morana: *nods* ...

Kaidan: Yaksha, watch the lad.

Gore: Who the hell are you calling a lad-?

Thalmor Soldier: Well the mutt couldn't have gone off far! Spread out and search for him! And be careful, there are hunting traps everywhere.

Inigo: *whispers, sword drawn* We go on your signal, my friend.

Morana: *nods, drawing her dagger and dousing it in poison* Go.

~

Morana: *taps Gore's shoulder*

Gore: *sitting by the fire, leg bandaged* Hm? What is it?

Morana: *showing him her notebook* How's your leg?

Gore: Fine. Your healer works wonders.

Morana: Yeah, he's the best we could ask for.

Yaksha: *competing with Inigo to see who can fit the most honey nut treats in their mouths*

Morana: ... Assuming he doesn't choke to death himself.

Gore: Haha! I can see there's no end of excitement with these ones.

Morana: Are you sure you're okay travelling with someone who used to be a Thalmor? I'll understand if you don't want to.

Gore: Hm, well.. It'll take some getting used to. I think I'll survive, though. As long as he doesn't try anything funny.

Morana: You sound like Kaidan.

Gore: Ha!

Taliesin: *walks out of the tent wearing his new Vagrant robes* ...

Morana: Well, how are they?

Taliesin: ... They are. Acceptable. I thought most Vagrant robes had conjuration enchantments though. Are these destruction?

Morana: I enchanted them myself.

Taliesin: ... I suppose I must thank you, then.

Morana: I suppose so.

Gore: I'm really gonna have to learn your sign language so I know what you're saying without that book.

Taliesin: It seems Lucien has taken up the mantle of resident sign language teacher, if you'd like to ask him.

Gore: I'll be sure to do that.

[lil-scout-precure]

Junior Eurovision 2023 detailed opinions before the show. Part 1

Well, as I told you in my previous post where I made my tier-ranking for this year's Junior Eurovision, I will now make a new explanation about my opinion of each song by tier! As my second live-watch JESC, I'm very hyped to see how this year goes since it's more of a ballad edition, I got more than one winner, and well the live decides it all!

Let's start from the lowest to the highest tier!

Tier 5: "I heard better ones in previous years"

🇮🇹 Melissa and Ranya "Un Mondo Giusto"

First of all, I will clarify I don't have any beef with this or other song in low places. I'm more open in JESC, I support the kiddos, and also, the songs are at least decent compared to some songs of the adult edition I really hate or just bore me. But since there are a lot of entries I like from this year, the first one really didn't catch me too much compared to others.

For being their first song in JESC, Melissa and Ranya sing so good in a duo. The raspy voice of Melissa caught me off-guard with the soft singing of Ranya. And somehow, the combination goes well for the song, apart of the main melody and the Italian talent. But for being a ballad between others this year, it doesn't surprise me too much. Like Albania last year with "Pakez Diell". And I regret right now saying Chanel Dilecta's "Bla Bla Bla" was the downgrade of the downgrades after Elisabetta Lizza's "Specchio" in 2021; at least Chanel's song would have been more than welcome in the train of ballads of this year.

I really hope the live version in Nice boosts them a lot. Because they have potential nevertheless. They are nice girls! :D

🇬🇪 Anastasia and Ranina (still Oto and Nikoloz for me) "Over the Sky"

I had better hopes for the Georgian trio this year. Like, it was a surprise for me when GPB decided to call two Ranina finalists, Oto Bazerashvili and Nikoloz Kharati, to join Anastasia Vasadze (Ranina 2023 winner and direct representant of Georgia in JESC 2023) for this edition. And well, a trio already won the Junior contest in 2008 and Ranina always delivers potential winners, so surely they would have a song to get their fourth victory, right?

First with the good things, the song itself is good. Calm and more serene, but good. And the trio really works here, even the boys have their moment to shine! (considering they decided to make Anastasia the main singer and call the male duo "Ranina", something that still bugs me). The music has good potential. And the lyrics inspire me, even the "Ranina, hey!" chant. But with the downsides, not the best song I expected for them after hearing a masterpiece like Mariam Bigvava's "I Believe" last year (and other songs from Georgia in previous editions). Not bad, but softer in vibes than 2022.

Hearing the rumours of two expert ballet dancers joining them for the live version, I think a good staging can deliver this song to a well-placed position still (and if possible, maybe win?). Just to wait.

Tier 4: "Unlikely but potential Top 5/Winners(?)"

🇦🇱 Viola Gjyzeli "Bota Ime"

To think I had this one at the bottom of my list before the revamp. As someone who listened (at work) the Junior Fest 2023, I thought "no way, they gonna choose another Pakez Diell again" due to most songs (and the contest itself) being soft; and "Bota Ime" 's first version didn't surprise me when it won. But when I thought it would be in the lowest place for the list, the revamped version came in the YT channel of JESC and my gosh, what a glow up!

It's still not, as a popular TV phrase in Mexico says, "Que bruto, pero que temazo!" ("What a bop!"). But the studio version gave the song the strength it needed a lot. Viola's voice sounds so whimsical and with class. The entry is way less plain than Pakez Diell at least. And as for the lyrics (the same one that wrote Duje made this? WOAH), if the studio video made them have sense, I wonder how will the live deliver that "own fairyland" feeling I appreciate of the song.

I really hope they keep the vibes and world-setting for the live version. To see them ruining it would be devastating for this song.

🇬🇧 Stand Uniqu3 "Back To Life"

After Freya Skye's SLAY (even if sick bc of cold night ceremony, darn you, EBU) in Yerevan with "Lose My Head", I knew United Kingdom wouldn't play easy. Sure, Mae Muller's "I Wrote A Song" placed at the last places in Liverpool (something I won't forgive alongside LOTL's unfair last place and "Solo" at the grand final >:U), but in JESC they would still give fiery competition! And we have "Back To Life"

A group in Junior Eurovision is always welcome in my list. And Maisie, Yazmin and Hayla (the girls) really got some good vocals and energy for their song! Sure, not too great compared to Freya's entry and queen vibes, but the song itself is awesome (and necessary given the time, when a lot of ballads were revealed)! They remind me a lot of Fifth Harmony imo, maybe by vocals or the entire energy they give in the song.

If the staging and live version can upgrade their entry to a new level than it is already, maybe United Kingdom can get some justice for what they did to Mae and get a good placing!

🇫🇷 Zoé Clauzure "Cœur"

As always, I expect for the host/winning country in a Junior edition to have a good "defender entry", a song that shows the world they're not playing safe just because they won once and/or host the contest. France did it with Enzo's "Tic Tac" (even if the Discord fandom despises him fsr), Armenia with Nare's "Dance!" (and they really ALMOST WON TWICE A ROW like Poland in 2018-2019). And I had my hopes high for France (again XD) after Lissandro's win

For being a French JESC song not written by legend (and idol for some of my mutuals) Barbara Pravi, this one takes the cake for being as French as possible (in a good way) and still be likeable for every audience! Zoe's vocals sound SO CLASSY for someone so young, and the song itself could easily be confused for an adult Eurovision entry (with some tweaks). And yeah, the entry reminds me A LOT of La Zarra's "Évidemment" (another Big 5 robbed entry this year, no wonder she gave everyone the finger and left the Green Room before the end of the votes). Not of my 100% favorites or a song I see winning JESC 2023, but I still love it.

At this point I wonder if they will pull a "Paris/France reference" in the live staging (like La Zarra did this year, queen), because the song itself is so wonderful it screams good live version!

-------------------------------------------------------------------

And that's all for this first part! Next one I will get to the personal wild card tier! See ya!

[jonathankatwhatever]

It’s barely still 14 Feb 2025. I’m not sure about the connection, kinda feel distracted but I’m thinking about the determinant of a quadratic form as gsProcess. The determinant is B^2-4AC, in which B^2 is the coefficient of xy, and A and C are of x^2 and y^2. That says to me there’s a ‘square’ or area of both, of xyK, which is greater than, equal to or less than an IC of those separate squares. That’s clear, right? The xy term is the square of the roots, where square only means an area, which is the idea of a quadratic form.

Started having visions too complicated to render, and those wiped me out enough that I could sleep despite the neck pain, which continues to intensify, which is not making me happy. I’m engaging in less than optimal mood, if not behavior, because I’m so aware of the accommodations needed to minimize pain. This includes entire posture resets, which I hope will be beneficial (and soon!) but which are distressing, like trying to force your body how to play chords so your mind can be elsewhere. Isn’t that a strange sentence? Lots of meanings in an awkward phrasing, in the hesitation, in the reservation, in the subtraction from the flow, sort of like it was lopped off, and I can see different ways that can happen.

One way is that we take xK or yK - though I think the convention is we call the choice xK if it’s left-right, meaning we recognize the label may be positional, and that any particular Extent is viewed in a systemic perspective in which certain views are xK. That was awkward. The idea is like that discussed yesterday, about the formation of points, of Ends, as the intersections of gsPairings over a fixed Boundary. And then we said that means we may fit to that structure in a variety of ways, like waves, like trying to thread a needle in dim light in a draft. May take a few attempts but the structure of what is needed to fit is there all along, and as it is there, then something shapes it to take form, and here I’m going to take a leap and say it’s the elliptical because of how that slices.

Go through that and see if it makes sense because it was more a feeling that this is the central idea of a bunch more, rather than being the start of a thread I can follow or am forced to follow.

I just put myself through one of the most painful episodes of stretching I’ve ever experienced. Sharp pain but I rolled my neck over much better, to the point where the motion felt like dance, which I know means correct. Holy gosh that was painful. I hope it helps.

Slice one is you slice to the xK. Or to the yK in that Irreducible. That’s gs, literally makes squares, like you have walls in 4 directions and you slide them in and out. That means there’s a mechanism in this which is focusing that, which is thus a circle because that is then the focus Boundary. It’s a circle when laid over the bT which runs from 1:2, from 3rd End to the 1-0Segment. And if that tilts, then yeah, it’s now short of the focus, and thus you see explicitly why the ellipse is symmetrical over and thus around the center line.

We need to talk about the center line: it’s a Bip pole because it’s each, both, and neither of the xK and yK Irreducibles. Commas fascinate me. If you construct forward, you end up with a lot. If you construct backwards, you start to think maybe you don’t need them at all. Each-both-neither conveys that - functionality. Oh, I get it: use this notation form to distinguish gsProcess steps. This is a fundamental one, and it’s a way of phrasing f1-3, in which we can see the formation of the 1 as 3 and into 3 and the 3 as and into 1. It’s the communicative structure emerging within gs.

I’m catching a flavor of analysis going on at your end. Interesting. That also manifests the conception of Hexagonal, that we have 2 separate Things, each represented as its gsPerspective, which we can see consists of each-both-neither. Interesting how that counts 1-2-0 except 1 is ambiguous so the 1 is 0 is 1 over 2, which maps of course to 2Square and we know how that converts into 1Square because we just did that.

So now you can see the fullness of Hexagonal because that maps a single Thing as well. You can even render than as a layer folded back over the Hexagon so the inside Hex feeds the outside Hex, which of course is next to another inside Hex. That makes the famous or infamous 18. I like the life connotation, but of course the other 18 is then the death connotation because in that mythic form - see: it’s useful to be mythic - the life and death choices and outcomes are next to you, are connected to you but are not you until they happen. We just mapped mortality to Hexagonal!

What about the Irreducibles in Hexagonal? I think I just assumed this was the gsConstruction form, meaning it’s each-both-neither and thus represents as an xK or yK Hexagon. Is that sensible? Sounds nice, doesn’t it? Yeah, that’s how the projective forms work. I can see D12 and thus D24, and the way those communicate is through the mechanisms we’ve been describing. Like a fixed Boundary and the gsPairings over that map to Hexagonal in the extremely basic sense that you take any 1-0Segment to the center End and any road out. CR the Hexagon and you drive from a daytime bumpy potholed gravel road to black ice in the dark.

I think you may be rubbing off on me.

And a one and a two.

So we got as far as ellipses being the perspectives which slice across the potential focal area, meaning you get less than full focus or full visibility in the orthogonal sense, meaning there is gsProcess which separates and connects these perspectives, which you can see if you CR them and you get what? You’re cutting into the xK oriented bT, and that draws a midpoint line which draws an inversion of the xK bT, flipped not over the 3rd End or the 1-0Segment along the xK but over what becomes the Bip when Compose the Irreducibles to make gs. Both directions, up and down, both directions side to side. Same gsProcess composition steps repeating.

And that makes seeing a hyperbola easier: it connects over the inversion of the bT in HG. So what you see is literally a guesstimate of what it could be: it’s on the line and if that line happens kinda deal. Thus the more hyperbolic a statement, the less likely. The closer to the straight truth, the more it seems likely, but it’s still hyperbolic, meaning it’s still over all that connecting gsProcess, which means over Hexagonal and over gs in 2Square. All those mechanisms finally connecting, exactly like I hoped they would.

On the other hand, it’s annoying that my wildest dreams are coming true because part of me says come on isn’t this good enough? I have to say it’s reached the pretty fucking amazing stage.

I’m always amazed at the ability of pain to find new Pathways. Same question as in Mission, and same answer, same thing I talk about with the Sticks, that the other side is a gsPairing over Boundary, exactly as we have described and thus the evil which exists is the evil they generate exactly in the awareness process described.

I need to take a break. Been sitting in a coffee shop in Montclair for the last while. More on ellipses and ellipticals later, I hope.

[devils-dares]

heyyyyyy! first off, congratulations on 100!!! you so deserve it!

next, i'm here to request prompt 34 from prompt list 1 because i'm feeling v soft tonight.

i hope you have a lovely rest of your night! 🥰

thank you so much, my love!

34. “Why are you wearing my sweater?” “Because it smells like you.”

The coffee pot was practically empty by the time you went to go refill for what must’ve been at least the fourth time in two hours. Not wanting to waste any longer yawning, you settled for the coffee ground laden liquid at the bottom of the pot. Putting a couple extra sugars in the steaming cup to balance the bitterness, you grabbed your cup and settled back into your floor nest of legal paperwork.

It was now 1:47 AM and you were sure that whichever intern at the DA’s office sorted these papers was going to have the pleasure of being strangled by you. Highlighting words and key phrases wasn’t fun, but it would help Foggy and Matt with progressing in the case. Sighing, you spoke out loud to yourself, stopping every few minutes to rub the sleep out of your eyes. You let your head rest on your hand as you read, which turned out to not be the smartest move as you fell asleep.

About 30 minutes later, you were awoken by heavy pants and pained grunts. You snapped up and snuck into Foggy’s office, grabbing the baseball bat he kept by his desk. Heading to the kitchenette, you raise the bat and before the man on the ground could say anything, you whacked him with it.

“Ow! Wait, stop!” You hear him say. He struggles to get up and once he does, you slowly back up until he hits the lightswitch, illuminating his figure and more specifically, the horns on his head.

“You’re- you’re devilman, uh, Daredevil! What the fuck are you doing in my office?” You say, putting the bat down.

“Heh, good question. What are you doing here at 2 in the morning?” He says as he finally stands straight. It’s then that you realize how much bigger he is than you.

“Just- uh, work for my bosses. Let me grab a first aid kit, I know we have one. You see, I uh, got a boss, little bit of a klutz, that one. He’s blind and always comes in bleeding in some way. I keep it stocked for emergencies.” You walk to your desk, situated next to Karen’s. Digging through your drawer, you finally find the bright red box. As you walk back to the kitchenette, you see that he’s taken his cowl off.

“Oh! Sorry, here I’ll just leave it on the counter.”

“You’re wearing my sweater, did you take it from my office?” He says as he turns around.

“Matt? Holy fuck! Come here and sit down, let me patch you up. Oh gosh, I hit you with Foggy’s bat, I’m so sorry that must’ve hurt.” He chuckles at your rushed words.

“Take a breath, sweetheart. I’m okay.” He finally takes a seat and helps you take his top off.

“My god, Matt.” He grabs your hand as you gasp at the vast amount of cuts, scars, and bruises.

“It’s alright, most of them look worse than they actually are. If you don’t want to help me, I understand.” You shake your head at that.

“No, I got you.” Wetting a rag with rubbing alcohol, you grimace when he sucks in a sharp breath through his teeth.

“So I’m a klutz, huh?” He chuckles.

“Shut up, had I known you were parading as the devil at night, I would’ve just said insane. How do you even… you’re blind, right?”

“Yes. It’s… complicated. I was blinded by chemicals, so, to make a long story short, when it took away my eyesight it enhanced my other senses. I can kind of see a weird 360 outline of everything.”

“Yeah, complicated.” The two of you fall in a comforting silence.

“You don’t have any other questions? Don’t want to scream at me or hit me?”

“No, I’m just, I’m thankful for you, Matthew.”

“You- you are?” He questions, but the steady rhythm of your heart tells him that you’re not lying.

“Yeah, absolutely. You’ve saved so many people… including me.”

“Seriously?” He tilts his head towards you, eyes glazed over but still conveying concern.

“Yeah, uh, my fourth night in Hell’s Kitchen. My friends made me swear up and down that I’d go out with them. I came out a little tipsy and was shoved in an alley, but before the dude could lay a single finger on me, the devil was there. And now the devil’s my boss, so there’s that fantasy out the window.”

“Fantasy? You fantasize about me?” A smirk plays on his lips.

“Cram it, Murdock.”

“Okay, answer this question then.”

“Can’t you read minds?”

“What? No! Who told y- anyways. Why are you wearing my sweater?”

“It- I uh, hm. It’s cold, and I forgot my jacket.”

“No you didn’t, it’s right over there on your chair. So don’t lie to me.”

“Fine! It smells like you, okay? And it doesn’t hurt that it’s oversized and criminally soft and warm and- mmf!” You’re cut off as he presses his lips to yours. Your hands slowly inch their way up his face to finally tangle in his hair as his hands hold your hips in a featherlight touch.

“I’m sorry, I just really wanted to do that. You’re cute when you try to reason your way out of things.”

“Yeah, well I’m not the lawyer here, am I? And uh, if you ever happen to get the urge to kiss me again, you go ahead and do that.” He rumbles out a laugh.

“I’ll keep that in mind. Are you all done playing doctor?”

“Yeah, yeah. Shut it, your bandages look pretty. Please don't scare me again.”

“After that whack with Foggy’s bat? I’ll be sure to announce my arrival.”

You groan out an apology and he kisses your forehead.

“Can I ask you another question?” He murmurs, lips still against your forehead.

“What am I, on the witness stand?”

“Why are you here?”

“To save your ass, of course.”

“I’m being serious.” He cups your face in his hands, stroking your cheeks with his thumbs.

“Realistically, I hate being alone. I can't stand it. I can't sleep, can't unwind. I come here to do work and burn my brain out so I can't overthink anything.”

“Come home with me.”

“I’m not subjecting you to my snoring and drooling.”

“No judgement. And you can take as many sweaters as you'd like.”

“...Promise?”

He laughs and kisses you again.

“I couldn't say no to you even if I tried.”

[rrasado]

hi!! hope ur having a good day today <33 was wondering if I can order some platonic savanaclaw boys (or the first year gang) acting all parental/brotherly towards a yuu/reader who's markedly younger?? i was thinking around 10~12 mayb??

⸢ Found Family ⸥

Other notes ➽ Gosh my heart TwT, though since you didn’t specify whether you wanted this in fic format or headcanons I went with a mix of both! But please specify next time what format you’d like thank you!/NM. Raise a glass to us touch starved peeps 🍷

Featured Characters ➽ Ace, Deuce, Jack, Epel & Sebek 

Trigger Warnings ➽ Implied injury and negligence.

Summary ➽ When you receive familial love from NRC’s twisted students.

Ace as a younger brother himself found your presence to be an opportunity to experiment. More specifically— he wanted to know what it felt to tease and bond with a younger sibling the same way his own brother did. He did seem to enjoy messing with Ace so maybe he'll learn from you?

Remember your first meeting with him at the statues? He may have laughed at your betrayed expression after calling you a dummy; but he did attempt in making it up to you using a few comedic tricks he picked up.

Coin behind the ear trick? Pick a card? Just a few magic trick phrases and your attention is on Ace-nii whether it's out of curiosity or annoyance. But he did have to admit learning these sleight of hand tricks from his old man paid off.

The Heartslabyul red head could tell from a mile away how you seemed adamant on getting something from him. In hopes of messing with you for a bit the first year hooked an arm around your neck before giving a hard noogie to your shorter figure.

"Hey my hair!-" "You'll fix it again squirt, now— what's got you marching in here like a queen's guard.?"

If your annoyed expression was subtle before it grew evident after he bursted into fits of cakles, the offense on your honor didn't go unconsidered but your request was nothing but amusing to him. At this point you were close to deeming this confrontation fruitless but before you could sigh and turn the other way, Ace threw you a pack of playing cards.

"Look, you said you wanted to learn some stuff from yours truly, right~? Well let's find us a better place then 😌."

A grin crept on your face sending a sense of satisfaction to the first year. Maybe being a big bro wasn't so bad after all? With an amused chuckle he pulled you towards the direction of the garden.

"Your hands are a bit small for most sleight of hand skills— but I've got a few spare tricks bearable for a kid like ya!" "Oi I'm still growing !"

Deuce wasn't sure at first, the protective nature he bared whenever you came into concern was simultaneously foreign yet familiar. If he had to compare its something akin to his former delinquent brotherhood bond but in your case— it was more precious for lack of a better term.

It's funny seeing you two believe in the same urban myths, sometimes it becomes a game among the first year gang who'd discover the truth first, your or Deuce? (Epel has a winning streak-)

He's the type to protect any teenage dream you have going on, you want to be a celebrity? He'll be your number one fan, you want to be a great inventor? He's willing to bestow whatever he knew to a future field expert like you! Deuce-nii may not be the best at helping academically but life lessons are something he's never short of.

It was a conflict he couldn't prevent, no matter how bad he felt for you fighting for his honor. Maybe his fighting spirit started rubbing off of you the more you stick by his side; that's bad... should he start lessening his time with you? He doesn't wanna be a bad influence after all-

"Deuce?" "Ah- sorry, does it still hurt?"

You two were at Ramshackle's foyer patching up eachother after he intervened a festering fight between you and some scarabia brats. He didn't even know whether to feel touched or worried when you revealed why you threw the first punch despite knowing how wrong it is to resort to violence. Maybe he really was a bad influence-

"My honor is mine to defend- g-got that? Look it's admirable that you well... stood up for a brother but I want ya to leave the hits to me." You're too young to delve into that side of life, he thinks.

The frown anchoring your lips sent a twinge of guilt to the spade marked first year, great was he being too hard now? How does Trey-senpai make it look so easy lecturing juniors- Lost in what to do he simply let his body slouch, leaning into your frame before allowing one arm to wrap around you in some tired side hug manner.

"We have eachother's backs right? Hah 😅, when I was your age I might've done worse things than just sending an uppercut at some entitled bastards. We both have a long way to go huh..."

The slow nod was enough to earn a bruised close eyed smile from Deuce. "Let's just wait it out, I don't think I can physically take Dorm leader's lecture tonight... But— that doesn't mean we're not owing up to our mistakes ok!?"

Jack was practically experienced, to the point it came naturally for him to subconsciously send a glare or two at those who gave the youngest student the stink eye.

He told himself repeatedly that he'll just aid you from afar but after the events of the second arc well- he wasn't sure whether leaving you to the adeuce duo was wise. Hence your roster of big brothers grew by one when he let you ride on his wolf form (after much convincing of course).

The more rational part of him honestly felt concerned over your psyche, to be taken from your home no matter how good or bad must've done a number on your thoughts, right? He never brings it up for the sake of your current stability but he does try to sniff out signs if he can.

The beastman's expression was stuck between confused and indifferent. How did he end up walking to class with you on his shoulders?

"You're so tall and you're only 16? Is it because you're a beastman? Or- a guy? What do you eat? Can you eat vegetables?"

One question after the other; and the fact that you were resting your chin on his head meant that all your questions were directly broadcasted to his hearing. It wasn't like he disliked your curiosity, sometimes he encouraged it! After all truth can be reaped from a curious mind's persistence. It was his assurance that it'd take more than a few jabs to break your moral spirit. If Jack was brutally honest you were a bunny in the jungle.

"A mix of both, maybe if you listen to proffesor Crewel's lectures you'll get a better gist."

He was half joking but a vibration wavered his head's senses when you sighed in defeat. An annoyed groan followed not long after before your talkative streak was boiled down into a hopeless inquirer.

"He's scary and that thing he carries looks like a pet weapon... aren't you scared of him, Jack?" You're a kid of course you'd come to that sort of conclusion, shaking his head Jack rolled his eyes before uttering a reply.

"You said it yourself right? I'm big for my age so what's a beast gonna do." Childish logic it may, he saw it effective when your state became that of satisfaction. Your hum of agreement letting the wolf rest his worries.

Epel didn't get why you stayed there, did you even have a choice? He felt like RSA could've accommodated you better seeing as how friendly their students are. But the more you hung out with the first year gang the more backbone you began to express in your aura.

As a ruffian kid himself he got along with you pretty good! Except maybe the first time you met but it wasn't like you could critique his singing when you're barely above the nursery rhyme category-

Something you two tend to bond over are road trips! The conversations surrounding the topic can go on and on until Vil has to interrupt lest it reaches nightfall, it wasn't wise to keep you both up after all.

A bottle of apple juice sat on the balcony of the dorm whilst your shorter self sipped happily on your own beverage. The lilac haired male was on another rant regarding the sights of Harveston rendering his drink abandoned whilst his hands moved in all sorts of mannerisms; just so that he can emphasize the value he holds on his home town. A place he's sure you'd like to visit seeing as how bright your gaze was watching his explanation.

"If we went there after exams we'd make it in time for harvest season! There's lots and lots of apples there with different sizes and colors!"

"Would their juice also taste different ?"

"Yeah 😄! Not only that- the folks are gonna like ya, that much I can bet!"

He shared Jack's concerns over your wellbeing, this whole time the only adult you've come into respects is the staff but with your predicament, maybe a more domestic scene of people would help you better. His folks may be on the more traditional end of the spectrum but hey- who doesn't like old folk!

"They won't force me to work would they 😰?" Epel bets ten maddol that you got the idea from Ace but his sigh was left unnoticed, the first year shook his head in a dramatic manner hoping to at least get you in better spirits for this tentative plan.

"So what? I ain't letting that happen- and even if it well- did, I'd be with ya picking apples from dawn till dusk! We can make it a game where the winner gets all the pick >:D"

Your competitiveness flared even if you tried hiding it by suddenly drinking your juice faster. Epel clenched his fist in silent victory, perhaps you staying in NRC was alright.

Sebek was the most unexpected member of your found family, it was hard calling him a brother. Wayward uncle somehow fits him more but no one would dare bring up the idea in both his or your presence.

After Jack, he's actually the most diligent in helping your academics. At first it was simply him wanting to show the young master that he's competent enough to aid the cherished child of man; Lilia however doesn't miss the genuine proud smile he wears whenever you perfect a practice sheet.

The old fae concluded that sebek was projecting in a way, a young soul in pursuit for learning but unlike him who was faced with double standards due to his human blood, you had people looking after your progress. Waiting to cheer your success.

The diasomnia student felt appalled by the others, their cheeky grins when he told them he'd be tutoring you on selected days felt belittling as if they won some unspoken battle. How preposterous! He thought.

"For a still developing human you catch on quick, as expected of the young master though! Only the finest catch his gaze." Everyone around him knew how eager Sebek was to be the subject of Malleus' astonishment, but that desire for recognition was currently a fleeting afterthought. The determination in your eyes was enough to urge the green haired male to move on to the next topic.

"You sly human— think you can trick me into overworking you? If I didn't know any better it'd seem you're trying to sabotage my relationship with the young master by framing me!" Despite his exaggerated accusations, his actions were more endearing, as endearing as Sebek can be of course. He passed you some chocolate milk and fish crackers, a childish iteration of his own favorite meal consisting of Salmon Carpaccio. It's too early for supper but you need energy if you want to keep with his subconsciously placed expectation. Even with his eccentric assistance you can't help but to appreciate his diligence.

"Heh think what you want Seb 0w0. Though you can always say if you're tired of me—" "Cease the foolish thought! And let you disappoint the young master? I'll have you know I've gone too far to just give up."

As blunt as his answer was there was an irk in his psyche, the way you worded it could've been interpreted as having a history of being given up on...

"No matter what measly tricks you pull, know that I'm not backing down, human! Prepare yourself because I'll make sure even the young master would praise you!" And by then, maybe Sebek can be proud of himself to.

Tag list :: @luvielle @sherbet-shark @citirusu

[the-witty-pen-name]

Deadbeat Pt. 7

Lee Bodecker x F!Reader

18+ ONLY

Warnings: age gap (reader is 21), fluff, angst, cursing, abandonment, toxic parent, violence, toxic siblings, infatuation, cheating/divorce, insecurity, mild housewife kink, mentions of prostitution, mentions of alcohol, corrupt official, fake relationship, jealousy

Word Count: 2.5k

Summary: You work at the bar at the edge of town, the Sheriff is going through a divorce and needs to rent a room.

A/N:

IMPORTANT UPDATE

I made a Google form to be added to my taglists, so if you want to be added, the link is in my bio. I’ll only be adding people to the list if they requested to be added by filling out the form! This way all of the requests are just in one place so I don’t miss requests! Thank you!!!

I’m sorry for this chapter being shorter than normal, but it is more of a transitional chapter to set up some new stuff! I’m trying a new writing style in this chapter and this is why the word count is shorter. I’m nervous about posting this chapter honestly, since I tried something different. The following chapters will be back up to 3.5-4k as usual! This story is not over! 

Thank you all so much for reading and sharing my work. Everyone whose reached out and told me how much they love the story really makes my day, oh my gosh!! I love you all so much, I’m so thankful.

Address mentioned is completely made up. 

This is unedited, and I missed anything I should include as a warning let me know! I hope you all enjoy!

Tags and Requests are OPEN

Part One // Part Two // Part Three // Part Four // Part Five // Part Six

Lee never stopped telling you how much he loved you. At first, you had thought it was a spur of the moment exclamation but you were mistaken. When you realized he meant it, you reciprocated telling him you loved him too, making him the happiest man in the world. It all happened so fast, and your relationship was evolving quickly.

Maybe living together played a factor in how quickly the relationship progressed. It’s hard to just be dating someone you already live with and can’t take out on proper dates. It made everything else happen faster. He wished he could spoil you and take you to restaurants and walk into a room with you on his arm, but he couldn’t yet.

But from that moment on, he never stopped telling you. He said the phrase probably every moment he could manage. Every time he called from his office; he wouldn’t hang up without muttering the phrase. He’d tell you that he loved you before he left the house, or he’d just announce it unprompted when you both were home together, like it was some epiphany or declaration. He’d love to whisper it to you, especially at night with you pulled tightly to his chest.

He made sure he’d tell you in nonverbal ways as well, always letting you know he was thinking about you. Somehow, you’d end up with flowers on your desk at work at least once a week as well, never with a card. He’d cook, and on his days off, he’d spend them with you or he would surprise you by fixing things on the house. Never in a million years had you ever expected Lee Bodecker to be such a romantic, and when you’d joke about it, he’d say,

“You give me a reason to be, doll.”

It was thrilling, having someone to love and to have those feelings reciprocated. The ability to just be able to give and receive love was something he was never able to manage, perhaps it was just never the right person, or perhaps he had always been too selfish.

Now for the first time in a very long time, he wasn’t thinking about himself.

You gave him purpose and something worth fighting for.

“When this whole thing is over and we’re out of this town, I’m gonna marry you,” he said rubbing your arm as you lay in bed cuddled up to his side. You lay your arm across his tummy and rest your head on his chest. You hum in agreement, resting your eyes, both of you waking up earlier than you needed and you were enjoying the peaceful moment of the morning together.

“I hate seeing you with that Russel kid,” he’ll mutter, possessively pulling you closer, you could feel the vulnerability in his voice.

The past weeks have been really hard on Lee. It bothered him more and more each day, knowing Arvin was the one who got to drive you home from work and just being out and about with you. He knew you were his, and he never didn’t trust you. But you were so blind to the boy’s obvious feelings for you. It was something that would eat at him at night.

He couldn’t even blame you, if Arvin was able to sweep you away from him. Arvin was a good kid- took care of his family, worked a decent job, went to Church, and he was your age. He was much better looking in the traditional sense than Lee as well. Plus, you had a history. The boy was your first love and no one forgets their first love.

He knew you didn’t look at Arvin the same way Arvin looked at you, but he was always worried that a shift could come. If that damned reporter wouldn’t leave town and the more time you spent with Arvin, the more you’d see how much you’d actually want to be with him instead. You always told Lee he was the one you wanted and he believed you, but he worried that you would change your mind. He was so insecure, and he felt guilt, and he knew that he didn’t deserve to be happy, that he didn’t deserve your affection.

Sometimes he couldn’t let himself relax. Scenarios of all the different reasons you could leave him for polluted his mind and he hated how it took him out of being in the moments he just wanted to enjoy. He’d see you in his mind, happy with Arvin, marrying him instead and creating all those experiences with Arvin instead of him.

“He’s just my friend,” you reiterate, probably now for the millionth time. You were patient, and it never seemed to bother you, that the two of you ending up having this same conversation over and over. He needed the constant reassurance, and he hated the fact that he did.

“I want you, Lee,” you’ll mumble affectionately, trying to shower him with compliments and praise, to lift him up when he got down like this. “I don’t want any other man,” you’d affirm.

“This town is poison,” Lee mutters, looking out the window, the blinds pulled back as the sun is steadily rising. “Everything feels like it’s tainted,” he observes.

“Except us,” you correct him. He nods, but he knows his statement especially applies to him.

“Except you,” he sighs, his fingertips tracing circles on your bare shoulder.

“You don’t think you’ve ruined me, Sheriff?” you tease, making him smile, gradually pulling him out of his state. You’d lean up and kiss him, and the sensation would help his thoughts fade away for a few minutes. The feeling of your lips and soft skin against his own just putting his mind at ease, using his other senses to just keep his mind at bay.

He’s not sure if you realize how much he means it when he talks about escaping away from the town and marrying you. He thought about it all the time and it was what he was working toward. He knew even if he managed to go straight, if when Curtis left town, if the case around your mom was resolved, the town would still eat you up. The image of you both would be sullied. Reputation was crucial for survival in a town like this. You’d already been subjected to it before your relationship started.

He knew the solution was simple. He needed to take you away from Ross County, move to a new town where no one knew you both. It would just be a Sheriff and his new bride looking for a place to settle down. No rumors, or peeping eyes, or reporters, or exes, no corruption- just the two of you. Get a house, maybe start a family if you wanted that too.

He hoped you did. He’d be content either way, but he wanted a big family. His growing up was much less than ideal and it was just him and his sister. He loved the idea of a bigger family. He loved the image of having a house that was loud in a different way than what he grew up in. He often worried if he’d be a good father, but he never once doubted how excellent of a mother you would be if you wanted.

The only thing he wanted in his future was you, and everything else would be a blissful bonus of things he also doesn’t deserve. But to him you deserved the world and he simultaneously wanted to give you everything but then at the same time he felt like he would hold you back. You were young and had so many good years ahead of you. He couldn’t imagine you’d want to waste the rest of your life or even the rest of your twenties with him.  

You could get a job doing anything you wanted and he could run for Sheriff in the new town maybe, or he could do something else. It didn’t matter to him anymore really. The time he’s been with you has really helped him see what is actually important. It was the only thing he wanted. He wanted to be able to give you that because he knew that you deserved it and more than he’d ever be able to give you.

Laying in bed with you on this lazy morning, reminded him of the last time he was there when you were still bartending. It was the first time that pesky day dream of his started. It was something a lot bigger now than it was then. He loved you, and he was relieved he could say it to you now, and he wanted to settle down. This backwards way the two of you got together was a mess but it was yours. He wouldn’t trade it for anything, but he knew he needed to make things right.

He had been so blind, for so long, and he finally started to feel like he could be someone he actually wanted to be.

All he needed was time and he could set it all straight.

***

Arrest of Pimp in Knockemstiff, Ohio Reveals Corruption of Town Sheriff

By: Henry Curtis

Sheriff of Ross County, Lee Bodecker, has been allegedly involved in the coverup of a local brothel, run by Leroy Brown. Brown and several of his associates were arrested on Wednesday night by local police for drug possession and possession of illegal firearms. As the group resisted arrest, there was a shoot out at a small bar in Meade, which was revealed to serve as a front for their operation. Seven men, including Brown, were arrested Wednesday night for questioning by the local police.

While giving his statement, Brown confessed to the charges and in hopes of a lesser sentence, cooperated with police and provided names of all involved in the underground prostitution ring. He provided the police with twelve names, including that of the local Sheriff Lee Bodecker and his sister Sandy Henderson, who has since also been apprehended by the local authorities.

Sandy Henderson was apprehended on Thursday morning, and made bail for $500 that Saturday. Henderson and her husband, both denied an opportunity to provide a statement. The pair only stated they will be promptly returning home and want to put this behind them.

Although there has been no release of his official statement as of yet regarding this alleged involvement, Bodecker was taken into custody the next morning, apprehended by his deputies from his home. Deputy Bill Thomas has since announced that the Sheriff will be subject to a trial in the near future, and for now faces an indefinite suspension from his post until his innocence has been proven. Deputy Thomas has also said that regardless of the outcome of the trial, Bodecker will be unable to run for reelection next term.

With this new development, it is also worth noting that the Sheriff is a tenant of (Y/N) (Y/L/N), the daughter of Estelle (Y/L/N)-Tucker who is currently wanted by law enforcement for embezzling thousands from her husband Harvey Tucker’s company, Tucker Brokerage, and then fleeing with her sixteen-year-old son. When police arrived at her home Thursday morning to apprehend the Sheriff, deputies on scene took an official statement from (Y/L/N), where she denied knowledge of the Sheriff’s involvement in any of the alleged criminal activities nor any knowledge regarding her mother or brother’s whereabouts.

Woman Wanted for Embezzling Funds from Tucker Brokerage Arrested in Indiana

By: Henry Curtis

Former resident of Knockemstiff, Ohio, Estelle (Y/L/N)-Tucker was arrested in South Bend, Indiana yesterday morning before dawn. Being able to identify her as a wanted person, Este and Harold Turner, owners of the Sunnyside Motel where (Y/L/N)-Tucker had been staying for about three days prior to the arrest, notified the local authorities she was staying in one of their rooms. She also was accompanied by her sixteen-year-old son.

The boy’s older sister has now become the boy’s sole guardian and he has since returned to his hometown. According to the police, the boy was completely cooperative and they believe he had no knowledge of his mother’s crimes. In a statement given the night of the arrest, the boy told police he believed they were running from his step-father, as his mother insinuated, she had been a victim of domestic abuse. There is no evidence yet as to whether her statement is true, but there will be an investigation of husband, Harvey Tucker, to discover if this claim is true.

Both children of Estelle (Y/L/N)-Tucker have not agreed to speak about their mother or the situation to anyone except police. Daughter, (Y/N) (Y/L/N), said when she arrived in Indiana to pick up her brother, seemed to only care about getting her brother home safely. Locals report she never asked to see her mother, and only focused on her brother.

As of now, (Y/L/N)-Tucker will remain in the custody of the South Bend Police until they are ready to transport her to Columbus, Ohio where she will face jail time and then eventually a trial.

Corruption in Knockemstiff High School Staff, Principal Arrested for Illegal Distilling- Sheriff Involved in Cover Up

By: Henry Curtis

Principal of local high school, Mark Cunningham, was arrested today after local police discover an illegal distillery on his residence. Police had retrieved a warrant to search Cunningham’s land after receiving an anonymous tip from a source close to the Principal.

Following his arrest, Cunningham admitted to the felony, but also claimed Ross County’s previous Sherriff, Lee Bodecker, had prior knowledge of the still, and in exchange for his silence, he demanded Cunningham offer a secretarial job at the high school to his landlord, (Y/N) (Y/L/N), who is the daughter of Estelle (Y/L/N)-Tucker, who recently was tried for embezzlement.

The vice-principal of the high school, Meredith Lively, has stepped forth as interim principal until the position can be filled, and ensured the press (Y/L/N) had been fired effective immediately, despite her claims of being unaware any such deal had conspired. Police have found no evidence to contradict (Y/L/N)’s statement, and in an official statement taken from Bodecker, he confirmed that it was part of the deal she not be made aware of the circumstances.

New Sheriff Elected to Ross County

By: Henry Curtis

Former Deputy Bill Thomas has been elected Sheriff of Ross County. Following the trial of former Sheriff Lee Bodecker, who had been found guilty of all charges, Bodecker was barred from office, and given a five-year sentence.

Deputy Thomas in an acceptance speech during a recent town hall meeting, ensured residents of Knockemstiff that “one bad apple doesn’t spoil the whole bunch” and the Sheriff’s department under new control will keep the town safe, and clean of crime and corruption. When asked by reporters how he felt about Bodecker, Thomas only described his situation as “unfortunate.”

There has been no other evidence of corruption within Ross County Sheriff’s Department although the investigation is still ongoing. When asked during his trial if he received any corroboration from any other law officials, Bodecker stated he never involved other members of the force with his wrongdoings.

REAL ESTATE  

Room Available for Rent in Knockemstiff, Ohio

$50 monthly rent (utilities included)

1 Bedroom (250 sq. ft.), furnished

Private bathroom with shower

4 Birch Street

Knockemstiff, Ohio

Please call the following number with serious offers. Price negotiable.

PART EIGHT

Taglist

@scar-is-bi @jiminlife2k18 @asylummaniac01 @rosalynshields @charmed-asylum @jamesbuchananbuckybarnes1917 @alexandrathegreat3 @hersilencedscreams @malar-region @purplerain85 @vesper852 @smilewolfdolan @softshell-taco @champagnebucky @lilacmeadows @mollygetssherlockcoffee

[barnesandco]

Little Hands (II)

Series Masterlist

You, Bucky, and Anastasia pay Bruce Banner a visit. 

This is an entry for @star-spangled-bingo 2021. Word count: 1836. Square filled: “You don’t wanna know.”

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Warnings: More Sad Child. Needles, fear of. So much overthinking.

A/N: Gosh, I’m so glad I got this chapter edited in time. I hope you like it and I’m sorry for skipping out on y’all last week! To make up for it, there’ll be two updates this weekend, so look out for the next chapter tomorrow! Lmk what you thinkkkk

The Avengers Compound is every bit as spectacular as you could have possibly hoped, and yet you’re unable to fully appreciate it because of the sheer absurdity of the situation. Your hand is in the vice-tight grip of the supposed daughter of your neighbor, who happens to be an Avenger.

Said neighbor is pacing back and forth in front of you as you sit in Bruce Banner’s laboratory, with Anastasia beside you while you wait for Bruce to arrive. Ana is remarkably calm, her young features – the round cheeks, still-wet eyes – made mature by her abnormal silence. Something about her makes you think she’s used to this kind of tension. Something about her screams war-child. Perhaps this grip she has on you is the first demand she has made in a long time, the only tantrum she has ever been allowed to throw.

While you aren’t particularly experienced with children, you think you want her to feel safe with you, because it seems she hasn’t been elsewhere. Ana’s eyes flit around the room in the only behavioral indication of her youth – a childlike curiosity, shining in the face of this fancy, new place that gleams like a toy store. Every now and then, her gaze jumps back from the alien appearance of the lab to her father (?) who seems intent on wearing a hole in the tiles with his pacing.

It is beginning to wear on you: both Bucky’s pacing and Ana’s steadily increasing anxiety. He hasn’t said a word to her since he opened the envelope, only asked that you accompany him to the Compound seeing as Ana won’t go alone with him (You would have gone with him even if that hadn’t been so. Though the nature of your relationship is ambiguous at times, the strength of your friendship is not. You’ll figure this out. You won’t leave him alone). Clearly, there is some unspoken memory that has him convinced the claim in the letter is plausible. Neither of you would be here if it wasn’t.

Bucky doesn’t talk too much about his past. He has offered a few of the shattered shards of his past reflection to you in the few night-caped moments you have hammered on his door upon hearing shouts across the hall. Between that, and what you know thanks to Black Widow’s file dump, the big Avengers’ in-fight in Europe last summer, the consequent resolution to the Accords, and Bucky’s publicized pardon, you can guess at the traumas that lurk in the depths of him.

They’re traumas that are closer to the surface of his eyes now, pulled forth by this new life, this little soul that has no business with such dark things, and the implication that this holds. Ana, innocent as she may be, is an insinuation of what else might have been unwillingly torn from Bucky.

You don’t want to think about it, because it hurts to do so, because you care for him, in many, many ways. It seems that Anastasia is also starting to tire of it. With every step Bucky takes, her hand tightens on yours. Fortunately, soon, the door to your left opens, and Bruce Banner enters his lab.

He's appropriately disheveled for this hour in the morning. Under his pristine lab coat, one of his shirt buttons is done into the wrong buttonhole, but his eyes are alert, frantic even, though you get the feeling that this is a man always on the edge of escape.

Bucky lets out a breath he seems to have been holding at the same time as his shoulders tense. “Thanks for coming so early, Doctor Banner. I wouldn’t have called if—”

“You never call, so I know it must have been important. But it looks like I’ve kept you waiting anyways,” Banner says, his eyes widening as they move from Bucky, to you, to the little girl at your side. “What’s the matter? You know I’m not a medical doctor, right?” He asks, putting a work bench between himself and his visitors.

Bucky clears his throat, and doesn’t quite know how to say what he needs to. After a few more seconds of hesitation, in which Banner waits patiently, Bucky extracts the envelope containing the fateful letter from his pocket, and hands it over.

The furrows in Doctor Banner’s brow multiply spontaneously, and when he looks up, Bucky gestures with a subtle nod of his head to Ana. He has yet to explain your presence, but you think Doctor Banner is a smart man. It won’t take more than Anastasia’s tight hold on you for him to put two and two together. Sometimes, a scared child is just that, no matter how unusual.

Most of their ensuing conversation is held at a lowered volume, set by Bucky, probably out of courtesy for Ana. You can hear snatches and phrases, most of them confirmations of things you had expected and some, not so much. Lobby security cam footage… fingerprints… paternity test… serum… blood sample…

By the end of it, some facsimile of a plan seems to have evolved between the two men, because Doctor Banner turns away with a smile and you, taking it as a welcome, stand and approach him. He rounds his desk and shakes your hand, exchange introductions though he hardly needs one, and then, he crouches, the way Bucky had, and offers Ana his hand.

“Hi, I’m Bruce.”

“Ana.”

Bucky steps forward. “Anastasia—” the name is clumsy on his tongue, because he’s scared. You can see it, and you hope he knows you are, too, but you’ll stand with him regardless, “—Bruce is going to check that you aren’t sick.”

“I’m okay.”

“We need to be sure.”

“Okay.”

Banner pulls out a chair, and you’re about to sit Ana down on it, when she pushes you gently into it, and sits on your lap. You can do nothing but wrap your arms gently around her, so she doesn’t fall. The apology in Bucky’s eyes is melted with a sympathetic smile. It’s alright. A child developing an inexplicable affection for you is not the worst thing to ever happen to you.

Ana is warm and a comfortable weight on you, and you hold her as loosely as you can, feel the movement of her chest against your arms with each breath. Her hair is a mix of wool-thick and silk-soft against your chin, smelling faintly of the sugar-sweet strawberry scent found in children’s shampoos. Someone took care of her.

Someone she isn’t asking for. What kind of child doesn’t ask for their mother, past the initial, momentary heartbreak? How has she come to terms with the apparent change in custody, when the new custodian hasn’t?

Whether Bucky is to be the new guardian has yet to be determined. You can see Bruce pulling out a syringe and preparing a vial. You wonder if she’s scared of needles. Bucky flinches at the sight of them, even now. He’s said that his disdain for the cold clinicism of medicine dates back to long before Hydra. Medical equipment reminds him of worrying that his best friend was going to die. It’s the fear he has harbored longest, longer than his fear of war, of gunshots in the dark, of blood on his hands.

Ana shares it. When she sees the needle, she screams, and Bucky lunges forward to help you hold her in place. She’s so, so much stronger than you thought and while you can hold her limbs, her head thrashes about, and so does her torso, making it impossible for Bruce to get to the inside of her elbow.

In the chaos, your eye lands on a trinket on a nearby desk, sitting there like a peace offering, literally beckoning to you. “Hey, Ana,” you whisper-yell, trying not to get hit in the jaw by her head. “Do you like animals? Cats? I have a friend who has lots and lots of cats, and I could take you to see them.” It’s working. You’re out of breath, but she’s quieting. Most little kids love cats. You love cats. “I think Bruce has a toy cat. See, over there?” You dare to lift an arm to point at the maneki-neko on the table. Ana stills. Her eyes follow the hypnotic movement, and the syringe at Ana’s elbow does its job.

When the bandage is put on, you and Bucky let go with twin nervous chuckles of relief and disbelief, and Bruce puts the vial in a machine. Ana hops off to approach the desk, and bats at the paw waving at her like a mirror of it.

“We should have the results soon. I think the others are starting to wake up, if you want to say hi,” Bruce says, taking off his glasses and wiping them on the corner of his lab coat.

“Maybe later,” you say, seeing that Bucky is hardly in any position to converse casually with his teammates right now. Not to mention, it’d be a lot of work to explain Ana, especially before having any sort of confirmation of who she is.

Bucky pulls out a chair next to you while Bruce opens a laptop a few counters away, and an x-ray machine lifts its head behind Ana, who has moved on from the lucky cat, and is stroking the leaves of a flowering plant.

“Peace lily,” Bucky says, startling you. You look at him, the bags under his eyes, the way he almost looks his age right now, and fight the urge to hold his hand. “It’s the first flower I bought for my apartment. I put it in a community garden after a nightmare about the war. Didn’t feel right for me to have it.”

He's talking about the Second World War. The war always refers to his first war. You think he’s talking about peace, and not the lily, after what he’s done. After what he was forced to do.

“It’s not your fault,” is an automatic response, and never enough, especially for the war, because at least he was in his own senses, even if he was drafted. It always elicits a self-deprecating laugh, but right now, he’s too tired for even that.

Right now, he can only watch as the x-ray camera follows Ana around the room, from the peace lilies, to an Amazon elephant’s ear, to a strange sculpture made from Coca-Cola cans glued together by what looks like spider-webs.

Too soon, Bruce calls you over to his work station. You follow Bucky, one eye on Ana.

“She’s yours,” Bruce says, and Bucky inhales sharply. Now, you do take his hand, stroke the metal ridges with your calloused thumb. “But she has disproportionately more of your DNA than her mother’s.”

“What does that mean?”

Bruce wrings his hands. “She’s not a complete clone, but nearly a genetic copy. 80% of a clone, if you will.”

Bucky is growing increasingly uncomfortable, shifting next to you. “How’s that possible?”

“You don’t wanna know.”

[ray-ray-writings]

Oh Boy!-BadBoyHalo

One of you lovelies requested a part two to Oh Baby! So here you go! I hope I do it justice and that you enjoy! 

This is a BadBoyHalo x gn!reader. Again this is pretty heavily fem but I know there are people that do get pregnant that do not identify as a woman, and for that reason this is gender neutral. Also, COVID-19? We don’t know her in this fic. 

How Darryl and Y/N tell their families, friends, and fans that they’re expecting. 

Y/N’s POV

After Darryl and I celebrated our good news, we decided it would be best to make a doctor’s appointment to check how far along I was and make sure everything was alright in my uterus. The doctor determined I was 6-7 weeks along and everything was going fine. Darryl and I once again celebrated by ordering food from one of our favorite places. 

“When do you think we can tell  people?” Darryl asked excitedly, picking at his food. I chuckled as I swallowed the food in my mouth before answering, “Well I definitely want to make sure that I get out of the first trimester before we tell anyone. I just want to be extra careful incase things go wrong,” I explained softly, a hand falling to rest on my stomach. Darryl nodded understandingly, “That makes total sense and I agree.” “Maybe when I hit 14 weeks we can tell our parents. And then maybe you could even invite the boys down at around 16 weeks and we can tell them in person,” I stated, shoving another forkful of food in my mouth. 

Darryl let out a small gasp, “You’d let the boys come over and stay with us?” I giggled and nodded, “Of course! They’re some of your best friends and the most important people in your life. You know, we could even have our gender reveal party while they’re here! We could record some of it and upload it somewhere and announce it to your fans, if that’s something you want to do!” I stated excitedly, my mind already racing with ideas. A soft smile fell on Darryl’s lips. He quickly leaned forward and pressed a small kiss to my lips. “That sounds perfect baby. I’ll talk to them about it tomorrow!” He exclaimed giddily. “Sounds good!” 

*Time skip. Many weeks later*

Keeping the secret was really hard for the two of us. But somehow Darryl and I managed. We did have a few close calls. A few slips of the tongue that caused raised eyebrows and hushed whispers, but we always managed to recover from the small mistakes. 

I was so excited to finally be out of the first trimester. Darryl and I planned a dinner for both of our parents. We invited them over under the pretense that we simply wanted to see them and catch up. The four didn’t seem to bat an eye. They came over and enjoyed a really nice meal with a very sweet dessert. After we finished our plates, I offered to brew some coffee for our parents. When everyone agreed, I immediately made my way into the kitchen, Darryl following close behind me. We had to keep our giggles quiet as we poured coffee into the four new mugs we had purchased. 

Yesterday, Darryl and I went out and bought four new mugs. But not just any four mugs. On each of the four mugs, the phrase, “Grandparent. Established: 2021” was written. Bad and I thought this was the best and funniest way to announce it to them, as well as giving each a cute little gift. 

Darryl and I quickly carried the mugs back into the dining room, making sure to cover the labels of the mugs so no one would see before they all were revealed. The mugs were removed from our hands and the four began sipping on their hot drinks. Darryl and I watched with glee as their eyes got wide as they caught sight of the writing on the mugs. All heads snapped to us as we began to giggle at their reaction. “Are you serious?” Darryl’s mom squealed. I simply turned to the side to show off my small baby bump causing the four to gasp in surprise. “Surprise!” The two of us exclaimed together. The four parents stood up and rushed over, wrapping their arms around us in a tight hug. Happy tears fell from everyone’s eyes as we basked in the announcement. The rest of the night was spent sitting around the table talking and laughing. It was an amazing night for everyone. 

*Time skip. Two weeks later*

Today was the day! The boys would be here any moment! Darryl had left early in the morning to pick the boys, Dream, Sapnap, and George, up from the airport. I would have gone with him, but I felt a little too ill. The morning sickness had died down a bit ever since I left the first trimester, but there were definitely days I still felt sick to my stomach. That being said, it did give me enough time to cook up a big breakfast for everyone to enjoy. They had said in the group chat that no one really had time to eat. 

It was perfect timing because as I finished the last pancake, the door swung open. “Honey! We’re home!” Four voices teasingly called from the front door. I quickly turned off the stove and rushed to the door. “BOYS!” I exclaimed in excitement, wrapping my arms around all three in a big hug. “Y/N!” They cheered back, immediately returning the hug. “You’re just in time! I just finished breakfast, come, come!” I babbled, grabbing someone’s hand and pulling them with me. 

The four boys followed me into the kitchen and quickly gaped at the sight. “You didn’t have to do all of this” Darryl whispered, moving forward and pressing a kiss to my cheek. I smiled and shrugged, “I wanted to.” Clay, Nick, and George quickly grabbed plates and piled theirs high of the breakfast foods. “Plus, it makes our announcement a little smoother” I murmured to Darryl as the two of us followed behind the three. 

Once all plates were piled, we moved to the dining room and began eating. We talked and laughed as we caught up with one another, discussing how their flights and things like that. Our discussion was interrupted by a loud beeping from the oven, causing us to jump. 

“Oh gosh! I have a bun in the oven!” I exclaimed standing up and rushing to the kitchen to turn off the stove timer. As I approached the dining room once more, I could hear the boys laughing and when I appeared, they began teasing me. “You’re so forgetful Y/N,” Clay teased, taking a bite of pancake. “Yeah how could you forget your oven’s on?” George also poked, taking a sip of his juice. “Hey, don’t be mean to Y/N! I’ve left buns in the oven before.” Darryl defended, giving me a slight wink. “Oh I remember that!” I exclaimed, “We’re still dealing with that today… And then for the rest of our lives as well.” The three boys fell silent at my statement. Confusion fell onto each of their faces, “What? What does that mean?” Nick questioned. I couldn’t help the grin that covered my face as I rested my hand on my stomach and turned sideways. 

An audible gasp left the three boy’s lips. “No way!” Clay uttered, “No way!” “Way!” I responded, turning to face forward and walk to my chair. “We’re going to be uncles?” Nick questioned softly. Tears pricked in my eyes at the question, but I nodded excitedly. “Yeah, you’re going to be uncles.” The sound of chairs scraping against the floor greeted me before three bodies slammed into me, hugging me tightly. I giggled as I attempted to wrap my arms around everyone to hug them back. Darryl’s chair scraped against the floor and soon his arms wrapped around us as well. 

We stood there for a while, just hugging. Our food was getting cold, but none of us cared. “Do you know the gender?” George asked, pulling his head back a bit. I smiled making eye contact. “I don’t, but our mommas do. They’re in charge of the gender reveal, which is this Saturday. We planned it so that you three could be here for it.” I answered with a grin. The boys seemed to be touched at what I had to say. “You didn’t have to plan your baby’s reveal around us,” Clay uttered softly. I simply scoffed and shook my head, “Of course I did. You’re a part of our family. You’re way too important not to include in this type of stuff,” I answered honestly. Tears seemed to form in everyone’s eyes at my response. “You’re our family too, Bad, Y/N. We love you” “We love you too.” 

*Time skip to Saturday*

Today was the day. We find out what gender our baby is today. I couldn’t help but grin as I watched everyone interact at the party. Darryl and I decided to combine the baby shower with the gender reveal so everyone could get together for one big party. It was also so that the Dream Team could be here for both without having to go home and then turn back around to come for a different party. Besides, they would already be coming back down a month or two after I gave birth so they could actually meet their niece or nephew. 

Darryl’s arms wrapping around me, startled me out of my slight daze. “We’re ready to cut the cake whenever you are,” He murmured, pressing a kiss into the side of my head. I hummed in response and turned to him, “I’m ready”. He ushered me to the table where the cake that our mothers had made. Our moms made a cute cake that was white on the outside with pink and blue decorations on the outside, with “Boy or girl?” Written on the top. “Gather round for the cake cutting!” Darryl called out. 

“Do you really have no preference?” Darryl questioned as everyone made their way over to the front of the table. I smiled and shook my head no, “I honestly don’t care, as long as our baby remains healthy, I’m okay with whatever they turn out to be.” Darryl hummed, kissing the side of my head once more, “I completely agree baby.” Once we made sure that everyone was ready, the two of us picked up the knife together. Darryl’s hands rested over mine as our hands hovered over the cake. The knife cut into the cake easily, a piece was quickly cut. I took a deep breath as we let go of the knife. Darryl reached over and grabbed a spatula to move the cake piece. 

“Ready?” He exclaimed to the crowd. Shouts of affirmation resonated back. Darryl slowly moved the piece out of the way causing blue M&M’s to fall from the center of the cake. Everyone that had gathered around burst into cheers at the reveal. I wrapped my arms around Darryl’s neck after he set the cake down on a plate. His arms came to rest around my waist. “It’s a boy!” I whispered, “It’s a boy Darryl. We’re going to have a baby boy.” “That we are, sweetheart.” 

The two of us let go of our hug and turned back to the crowd. “Well come get some cake!” I exclaimed, motioning for everyone to come forward. Nick, Clay, and George were the first to charge forward. Excited babbles fell from their mouths about having another boys join them. They chattered about how they were going to teach them everything there was to know about Minecraft, not that they couldn’t do that with a girl, but they couldn’t help but be so excited about a boy. A grin fell on my lips and my hand fell to my tummy as I listened to the four babble about everything they were going to do with our baby. Only one thought came to my mind as their words rang in my ears… Oh boy! 

*Bonus*

The day after the gender reveal, Darryl posted a photo of the two of us hugging after we cut the cake. It was a picture that I didn’t know existed, but was so glad it did. The response was overwhelming. The fans exploded at the announcement. Many comments and tweets were so supportive of the two of us having a baby together, claiming it would be the best and cutest kid ever, which I couldn’t help but agree with. Fans being excited about the baby just made me even more excited, I couldn’t wait to hold my baby boy in my arms.

 There you go! I really hope you enjoyed, if so please be sure to leave a like!!

[annieharkness]

Glimpses: Part 12 (Kathryn Hahn x Fem!Reader)

Part 1 // previous chapter <<< >>> next chapter

Summary: Will you be able to go with Kathryn?

Word Count: 2k

A/N: This is a little shorter, I know, but I hope all of you still enjoy it. Look at this little tag list we have going on now!! - I might actually get a little emotional that so many of you are still reading this little story. With all that being said, here we gooooo. xx

Tag List: @danvers97 @zafirosreverie @srtamercurio @wanatag @pulledbythestars17 @plantowl​

Don't forget to check out the new official Playlist! :)

_____________________________________________________________________________

“You can’t take her.” Jennifer is walking up and down in Kathryn’s office. She arrived here right after you had left, ready to plan to thrip to New York, as well as the upcoming project. Kathryn shifts her focus from her hand to her manager and huffs. 

“NO. Kathryn, no. You know it yourself. First of all, she is a distraction. Yes, you like her, I KNOW, but this is not you. This is not how you do your job.” Jennifer looks at her boss with pleading eyes.

Running her fingers through her long mane, Kathryn bites the insides of her cheek. “you’re right, I know you are, but at the same time…”

“NO BUTS, Kathryn.” Jennifer interrupts her, prompting Kathryn to shoot her a short glare. 

“…but at the same time I haven’t been this happy in years.” Thinking back at the time you spent with her, a small smile creeps onto her face.

Jennifer gets it. She understands Kathryn’s point, but as her manager it’s her job to secure the actress’ job, which is why she needs to make sure there are as few distractions from work as possible included in the trip.

Placing a hand on her arm, Jennifer looks at Kathryn with warm eyes. “Sweetie, I know you don’t like it. I don’t like it either, because I know how good the time with her is for your heart. But we can’t have this. Not now. Not during your shining moment. Yeah?”

Slowly but surely, Kathryn starts to nod as she can feel the sadness rise in her chest.

Meanwhile, you and Alex are having the same conversation back in your room. She tries to talk sense into you and talks animatedly to her phone, as you try to find a way to accompany Kathryn.

“Honey, you simply can’t. There is no way. It’s during the exam phase. You can’t be abroad for that.” She shakes her head.

Considering your options, you try to talk against her. “I could ask for online exams.”

“… there is a multiple hour time difference - you can’t be serious, Y/N.”

“I could postpone exams?” You raise an eyebrow.

Alex shakes her head harder now. “NO GIRL. No. Kathryn wouldn’t want you screwing up your education for this. You have leftover classes, exams to write and then you’ll have to write term papers you have to prepare for,” you take a visible breath. “Yes love, I am aware you could write those on set but we all know you wouldn’t. It’s better for you to stay.”

You want to argue. You really do. But there are a few things holding you back. First of all, you know Alex makes a valid point. Second of all, you don’t even know where you are standing with Kathryn. What are you to her? What is happening with her? The lines are so blurry that it’s hard for you to see, so you think it might be better not to assume and make a fuss about all of it.

Lastly, you don’t even know if she wants to have you by her side in the first place, because, again, it’s not like she is your girlfriend or anything. Not that you wouldn’t want her to be.

So, just like Kathryn does with Jennifer, you agree to what Alex says and make your decision to stay, even though it hurts your heart just as much as it hurts hers.

Given the fact, that she has to leave for New York right the next morning, it’s not possible for you to see her again. You think back at the soft kiss she planted on your lips as you left her house under yesterday’s hot afternoon sun. You feel so good with her and you can’t stop to think back at how beautiful her eyes look up close - even more beautiful than on all her pictures that Alex and you have been sending back and forth whenever Kathryn did a new promo shoot.

It’s late afternoon as you’re lying on your bed and stare at the ceiling, a random Marvel movie running in the background.  Alex has been trying to hype you up all day, but, given the fact that Kathryn is gone for an unforeseen time, you still feel sad.

You turn off the movie because you can’t seem to concentrate and connect your phone to the speakers to play some music. You remember that you can sit on your windowsill that’s facing the backyard and and decide to sit down and watch the birds in the tree outside your window as you open Spotify and it starts playing the last song you stopped on. “She” by dodie fills the room and you don’t think you related to a song like that ever before.

It really describes the feelings of uncertainty that you have right now. It doesn’t help that you never really took the chance to talk to her about all of not. Not properly, at least. This mistake leaves you with this endless feeling of emptiness that seems like it’s eating you up from the inside as you don’t even know if she feels the same in any way. 

Your phone chimes and you nearly fall off the windowsill as you shoot up to reach for it. It’s the group chat you thought had died a while ago that you joined right after Kathryn appeared on Wandavision. 

Apparently, news of Kathryn’s casting already sank through and everyone is screaming about it. Unwilling to share any knowledge, and also way too careful with it, you want to put your phone away as it chimes again and your eyes widen.

You immediately click the message.

“New York is wild! Haven’t had time to get to you yet. Seems like everyone and their mom wants to speak to me today. Just left my second meeting and now I have to leave for a work dinner in a few. How’s the day going back home? xxx K.”

A bright smile creeps onto your face as you realize she uses the “everyone and their mom” phrase that you use so much whenever you describe difficult situations to her. You decide not to reply immediately - you don’t want her to assume you are sitting on your phone just waiting for her. 

Instead you opt to create some art and grab your supplies. There is an empty canvas behind your bed and you feel like there are enough feelings trapped in you to create something cool on it.

Your mom works long on Mondays, so you haven't realized just how much time has passed as you perform the last of the night and call it a day. Your picture is colorful. Very much so. The acrylic paint hasn’t even dried yet, but there are already tons of ideas floating around in your head about what to do with the artwork from here on out. Maybe you should get some fine liners and work out the edges, maybe do some highlighting as well, you don't know yet.

Just as you want to put the brush aside your phone lights up on your bed. You can't pick it up just now because the slowly drying paint sticks to your fingers and you anxiously reach for the closest paper towel to white it off as best as you can. Not expecting anything, you finally reach for your phone and pick up the call before reading the name - an automatic reaction to late night calls from Alex.

You are greeted by a very familiar, yet unexpected, face. Kathryn smiles into the camera and adjusts the lights around her. She is clearly in her pjs, with no make up on, her hair open and messy, falling off her shoulder. You can see she is wearing a loose gray shirt and your whole body starts tingling as you realize it's the shirt she gave you to sleep in last weekend. Immediately, your brain runs wild and you try to figure out if she packed this exact shirt on purpose or just grabbed the one that was available easiest as she was probably in a rush.

Luckily, Kathryn interrupts your train of thought. “Hey! Hiya hon! I just wanted to check in. Make sure you’re alright because you haven’t replied to my message.”

For the first time you look at the clock. It’s 8.30pm and you haven’t had dinner yet.

“Shit.”, you mutter and your hand flies to cover your mouth immediately. 

Kathryn, who hasn’t heard your muttering, looks confused. “Sweetheart, is everything alright?”

You smile thankfully. “Yes! Yes it is. I guess I was just wrapped up in my art and you pulled me out of it and I always need a minute to adjust. I’m fine. It’s late though and I haven’t eaten yet. Thank you for reminding me.”

“Good. Do you want me to order you pizza or something. Because I totally would.” She reaches for a notepad.

“Alright Mom…” she looks at you for a moment and you can’t tell if she is shocked or amused or anything really because she stopped reacting completely and just stares at you. Right when you are about to start panicking about the situation she bursts into laughter.

“I mean I’M SORRY. How dare I offer pizza.” She continues laughing. You love this. This is easy and light and you realize once again just how much you enjoy her company. Gosh, you miss her already.

You remember her message as you make your way downstairs. “How was dinner, Kathryn? And the rest of your day? Tell me about it!”

For the next 10 minutes, as you prepare your own dinner, she tells you about her day and the plans for the next few weeks. The two of you laugh and make jokes and for a moment it seems like both of you have forgotten that you won’t see each other for a while. After she finishes talking, you fall into a comfortable silence and just look and smile at each other for a moment.

“I like you, you know?” She is the one to interrupt the silence. “Spending time with you makes me really happy and I’m sad you can’t come to Europe with me. I need you to know. I wish I could’ve taken you with me.”

Your heart melts and your hands start to shake as you realize Kathryn might indeed feel the same way. You put the knife, that’s in your hand from making dinner, aside. You’re unable to answer right away and fight for the right words, so she continues on with her short monologue.

“I just wanted to call tonight to check in and see how you are doing since I had to kick you out so abruptly last night and maybe we can do this from time to time, check in on each other? I would love that.”

Check in on each other? Why is she so vague all the time? For a moment you thought she’d confess her feelings for you but here you are again, uncertain of what she really thinks about you. You smile, though, and try to keep it calm because you don’t want her to get annoyed with you already.

You realize it’s getting close to 9pm, which means it should be about midnight at her place. Taking responsibility, you send her off to sleep and have a short dinner followed by some reading yourself.

Before Kathryn hangs up, she promises you to call again before leaving for Europe completely. She also wants to know if you want a souvenir from NYC (why is she so cute?) and tells you to call her anytime you need something or someone. With that, she shoots you the brightest smile and leaves you to it.

The ecstatic feeling you felt when you talked to her fades quickly as you come down from the call. Suddenly, your home feels all quiet and lonely and the silence is killing you. You walk back up to your room to sit on your bed and stare out of your window to enjoy the night sky. The tree right next to your room is slowly moving in the wind as its branches scratch the glasses surface.

You decide to call it a day as the week ahead is full of work and school and the weekend was eventful, so you change into comfy clothes and get ready for bed immediately. You fall onto your bed a few minutes later just as your phone lights up again.

"Good night, Sweetheart. It was great seeing your face. xxx K."

[tinyboxxtink]

"....So I Married A Monster" *Chapter 3*

So I gave you a LITTLE lovin' at the end, give me a break. I'm loving all the angsty comments I'm getting. Really gives me a rush relishing in your pain. MWAHAAHAHAHAHA. I'm kidding I love you all please don't leave me.

Chapter 2

Chapter 4

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-------

The next morning

As soon as you dropped Kylie at daycare and Maggie at school, you headed to work. You worked as an executive at an advertising company, so it gave you a lot of freedom to work from home. Really helped the whole "single mom" thing.

But today you had to go into the office for a meeting, and you were dreading it. The one day you could really use to yourself, you had to go and be around people, pretending to be okay. This was going to be hell.

During your meeting, you felt your phone buzzing in your pocket. You immediately went for it, thinking maybe by some miracle Rafael had figured out a solution super fast. But to your horror, it was a text from Billy.

LUNCH?

Oh god. He knew didn't he? He knew everything. There was no way in hell he was getting you alone in your house right now. You quickly texted him back discreetly.

I'M AT THE OFFICE TODAY.

*BUZZ*

THAT'S HALFWAY TO THE CITY. COME ON, I PROMISE I'LL HAVE YOU BACK IN TIME TO PICK UP THE GIRLS.

Was he serious? He wanted you to meet him in the City? Closer to Rafael? What kind of game was he playing? Well, at least you'd be in a public place. He couldn't murder you in front of an audience. And he promised you could pick up the girls, surely he was just going to let you leave after lunch. Right? While you were thinking it over, your phone went off again.

MY TREAT

His treat? Well, that would be a first. Sure he took care of them when they were married, but since their divorce he hadn't offered up a penny more than his legally obligated alimony and child support.

"Miss Y/N, do you have somewhere better to be?" Your boss interrupted your thoughts, you noticed that the whole boardroom was staring at you.

"No sir, sorry sir," You shook your head as you typed a quick OK back to Billy before shoving your phone back into your pocket.

-------

After your meeting you headed to the restaurant address Billy texted you. You sat in your Uber running your fingers nervously through your hair and checking your makeup. Though you really weren’t sure why-- Billy wasn’t the cute harmless man you fell in love with anymore, you had to remember that. No matter how much his smile made your knees weak.

You walked into the restaurant to see Billy already at a table. He smiled and waved at you, you walked towards him and joined him.

“Hey, sweetie,” He went for a hug, but you went for the handshake.

“Hey, Billy,” You nodded as you sat down across from him. “So, what’s up?”

“I just wanted to make sure you were okay,” He kept that hundred watt smile focused on you, you felt yourself blush.

“Okay?” You tried to act nonchalant as you picked up a menu and browsed it.

“Yeah, you know after I found out you were with that animal, Barba,” He picked up his own menu and began to peruse it. You were glad he wasn’t looking at you in that moment because as soon as he called Barba the animal as opposed to himself, your fists clenched.

“Oh? Yeah it was no big deal…” You tried to keep your voice calm.

“So what did he say about me?”

“N-Nothing, I kicked him out as soon as I hung up on you, Billy,” You glanced up at him. You weren’t lying, you did kick him out right after you hung up. And it was the biggest mistake in the world.

“Really?” He looked genuinely surprised, but elated. “You just believed me over him, just like that?”

“Well, of course Billy,” You nodded as you put the menu down. “You’re the father of my children, I’ve known you for almost a decade. I...loved you,” You gulped as you sipped the courtesy water. You didn’t know if it was a great idea to toss that in, but you figured you needed to throw him as far off the scent as you could.

“...Loved?” Billy asked curiously.

Shit. Abort Abort.

“I mean, I’ll always care about you Billy,” You put a hand over his, giving him the sweetest smile you could manage.

“And Barba?” He gripped your hand a little tighter. “Do you love him?”

Shit. Alright, stay calm.

“I thought I might,” You nodded sadly. “Before you told me what a...monster, he is,” You hated even saying the words, but he needed to buy what you were selling.

“Oh, honey,” Billy gave you a sympathetic smile. “You know that’s what I’ve always loved about you. Always so trusting, and loyal...those are really great qualities in a woman,”

“...Thank you?” You sounded offended.

“Gosh,” He chuckled. “You know I am starting to forget why we even broke up,”

Oh God.

“B-Because you were always working, and you thought it would be unfair to keep going like we were going on the kids, and me,” You reminded him.

“I did say that, didn’t I?” He half laughed. “Gosh, you know I think I...I really messed that up,”

“...What?” You nearly choked on your drink.

“I think I made a huge mistake, choosing my...work, over you and the girls,” He gave you a genuinely apologetic smile.

“Oh, Billy you--” You tried to dissuade him, but he wasn't having it.

“No, you know what Y/N having the girls this past summer, it reminded me how much they mean to me. How much you, mean to me,” He took your other hand in his so he was holding them both now.

“But you know what? No more. Screw my job, I’m choosing my family this time,” He gave you the most loving smile and look you’d ever seen on him. You were starting to be even more confused than ever.

“...R-Really?” You blinked in disbelief. “You’d just...give up, your...job, for us?”

“Yes, I would babe,” He nodded, rubbing the back of your palms with his thumbs.

Suddenly, you remembered what kind of “job” he actually had. How could you get out of this? What would make sense? Wait, a thought occurred to you.

“...No,” You removed your hands from his.

“....No?” He repeated, his tone shifting. “What do you mean, no?”

“I mean, I’m not going to let you back into our lives, back into the girl’s lives. Get their hopes up that we can be a happy family again, and then you just take off again when you start itching to get back to work!”

“....Itching?” His nostrils flared. “Is there a reason you used that...specific phrase, Y/N?”

“No, it’s a term, Billy. Look it up,” You were getting more brazen, knowing you had a crowd of eyes around you. He wouldn’t try anything.

“You sure that’s not a certain lawyer talking, sweetheart?” He didn’t let up.

“....How do you know him, anyway Billy?” You suddenly changed the subject.

“Excuse me?” Now it was his turn to blink in disbelief.

“You knew him, when you called me,” You reminded him.

“Well yeah babe, I know he’s a--”

“A monster,” You finished.

“Yeah, I told you--”

“But, how would you know that?” You asked again.

“What?”

“He’s a prosecutor, Billy. You’re a...whatever it is you are,” You crossed your arms. “So how, do you know him?”

“Because….” You saw the wheels turning in Billy’s head. “Because he and the NYPD set me up!”

“They set you up?” You asked curiously.

“Yeah,” He sniffed and rubbed his nose as the waitress came and took your orders. He eyed her nervously as she wrote down your requests and left the table once more.

“You gonna elaborate?”

“Look right before I met you, I was living in the city,” He sighed, starting his story. “And I was on a harmless jog in Central Park, and these tourist girls got spooked and this bitch detective brought me in, started getting her whole squad zoned in on me for some reason, including your man Barba,”

“Just for no reason?” You gave him a look.

“Yes!” He pounded the table, causing some stares. He took a deep breath, and repeated himself. “Yes, babe,”

“Uh huh,” You nodded as the waitress brought your drinks. It was only lunch but you had ordered a martini, you needed it to get through this.

“Look I thought you said you believed me,” Billy’s eyes narrowed. “...Or was that a bunch of bullshit?”

“N-No,” You suddenly sat straight up, remembering you needed to keep up your act.

“I’m just trying to understand the whole situation, baby boy,” You threw your old nickname at him to diffuse the situation.

“Right…” He licked his lips with a smile as the waitress came and sat the food down in front of each of you.

“Anyway, babe they set up this whole thing. They went on a vendetta against me, I swear to God. They-- they started pulling all these records of me from places I lived, trying to pin me to something, anything. And then their Captain…” He stopped and chuckled, but not his normal chuckle. This was more...sinister, darker.

“She just had this...thing, for me,” He smiled as he remembered her, the “Good times” they had. “She begged me to spend this bender weekend with me and when things didn’t go her way, she tried to say I ‘kidnapped’ her, raped her, did all this nasty stuff to her,”

“....Why would she make that up?” You took a bite of your food. He was just spilling all of this information without you even prying, this seemed too easy.

“Because she’s a BITCH, that’s why!” He suddenly yelled again and pounded the table, more people turned to stare this time before he quickly got himself together once more.

“Billy, I’ve never seen you like this,” Your voice shook as you spoke.

“I’m--I’m sorry, Y/N,” He blinked back tears. “They just...they put me through hell,” He began to show you scars on his face and pointed to his ear. “She...when we went on our little bender, she got so hopped on pills and booze that she beat me within an inch of my life,”

Your hand went over your mouth as you saw his injuries for the first time. You put your other hand and traced the scar, tears in your eyes. He couldn’t have just faked those scars, there was no way for him to know you’d start questioning him like you had.

Maybe...maybe he was telling the truth. You had just taken Rafael at his word, and those articles at theirs. Stories could always be spun, and if it made the NYPD look good, that would make the best story, right?

“Billy…” You wiped his cheek with your thumb, tears were spilling down them. “I am so, so sorry…”

“It’s fine,” He sniffed, wiping snot from his nose as he pulled himself together. “I just...I just want to move on,”

“Yeah…” You nodded, patting his cheek gently with a small smile.

“So, will you let me come home?” He asked you with a sad smile.

“I…” You looked down at the table, mulling everything over. You really, really didn’t want to believe Rafael had been the liar here, just covering up for his best friend.

But...Billy seemed genuine, you had known him so much longer than any of them, maybe you knew him better than they did. You knew he was the wrong guy they should have tried to send away, maybe he was just the victim of their dirty captain. But the whole…”job” aspect, you weren’t sure of. You still didn’t know what he did, and why he had been gone all the time. Rafael’s explanation seemed logical.

“...I’ll think about it,” You looked at him with a small smile.

“You’ll think about it?” He quirked an eyebrow.

“Billy, you really hurt me,” You felt tears come to your throat. “You have to know that,”

“I know, babe…” He gave you a sad smile back, taking your hands again. “I get it, I have to earn your trust again,”

“Yes,” You nodded, glad he wasn’t going to press it. He nodded and looked at the table for a moment, then looked up at you with that smile of his.

“...You know, if you want the afternoon off honey, I can pick up the girls,” He offered.

“E-Exucse me?”

“You want to go see Barba, don’t you?” He was now smirking. “You want to verify what I’m saying, right?”

“I...um…”

“Go for it darling, that’s how confident I am you’ll make the right decision,” He encouraged you.

“...Right,” You nodded, downing the rest of your martini. “And if I don’t, you’ll have the girls as leverage,”

“Aww now Y/N…” He kept his smirk, it seemed more evil now when you looked at it. “I won’t need leverage, will I?”

“....No,” You gulped. You didn’t entirely trust him now, but you weren’t about to turn down a chance to see Rafael. Besides, if what he said was true, Billy would never harm the girls.

“Good then, so we’ll see you at home?”

“Sounds good,” You nodded as Billy laid down his card on the check. You got up and headed to the door, dialing Rafael’s number. You remembered that he had said not to contact him first, so you thought you’d do him one better.

-------------

Rafael was in his office putting together his opening argument when you knocked on his office door.

“Come in,” He said nonchalantly, thinking it would be his assistant with a memo.

He glanced up from his desk as the door opened and dropped his pen when he saw you. He blinked a few times, making sure he wasn’t hallucinating as he stood up from his chair and approached you slowly.

“....Y/N? What are you--?”

“Shut up,” You cut him off with your words before catching his lips in yours in a hungry, aggressive kiss.

You didn’t care what Billy had said, or what events led up to right now. You just knew at that moment you needed Rafael. And you took him, no regrets. You two spent several seconds just kissing and drinking each other up, hands roaming all over each other’s bodies.

You’d think you two had been separated for months, not barely 24 hours. But you both had been sure it would be ages, maybe ever before you saw each other again, and like you had said before you’d never been out of each other’s lives for more than a day since the day you met. Fine, maybe you were a little overdramatic.

“What are you doing here, tonta?!” He suddenly broke apart from you and chastised you. “I told you, it’s too--”

“Billy sent me,” You simply said, breathless from the kissing.

“...’Billy’, sent you?” His eyes narrowed. “And why exactly did Billy send you?”

“...We need to talk,” You bit your lip nervously. “But...but I just...I just want us to be us, for a little bit longer,”

“...A little bit longer?” Rafael’s eyebrows furrowed. He didn’t like the sound of that one bit.

“Just...please, Rafa?” You begged him, your doe eyes wet with tears. You knew what you were about to have to do, and you just wanted to be happy for a few more minutes.

“...Bueno,” Rafael sighed, before he grabbed you by your waist and carried you over to his couch, before resuming making out with you like two teenagers.

He didn’t like the sound of where this was going, but he knew he wanted to put it off as long as possible. And he had missed you like crazy, even if it had just been 12 hours. He loved you so much, and so fast, it scared him.

You didn't know what you were going to say to Rafael once his tongue was out of your mouth, but right now you didn't care. You just wanted this to go on forever---

And then there was a knock at the door.