#good on me for having self control i guess (neutral. my self control is too much sometimes)

[fear-is-truth]

Sorry if this is out of character before hand 😔

Anyways!! How do you think Kai would react if he found out !user was pregnant? I know you have one like this already (I think?) but what if they found out it was a girl and not a boy?

Personally I think he’d be pretty pissed that !user wasn’t good enough to conceive a boy or that !user obviously did something wrong. But that’s just me🤷‍♀️

I want to know how you think Kai would react. Sorry if it’s a weird request or if you’ve already done something like this before.

By the way I love all your works and you’ve been uploading so much lately and I love you for that for real🤞

ahhh you’re too kind !! so here’s my take..

kai stands there, arms crossed, expression tense. he’s not furious, but there’s a definite air of disappointment. you can almost feel the energy shift in the room as he stares at the ultrasound screen, jaw clenching. “a girl, huh?” he lets out a slow exhale, rubbing the back of his neck before turning to you with a disgruntled look. “figures.” you blink, unsure of how to respond. “…what’s that supposed to mean?” he just shakes his head, sighing as if the universe has somehow conspired against him. “i guess we’ll have to work with what we’ve got,” he says eventually, glancing at you with a half-hearted smirk. “she’ll have to be as tough as any boy.”

at first, there’s a brief moment of frustration. he has always envisioned raising a son—someone who could follow in his footsteps, take up the mantle, and carry on his ideology with pride. to kai, sons represented strength, power, and legacy. his first instinct is to feel a bit slighted, almost as if the universe had conspired against him.

he doesn’t voice this frustration aloud, though—he’s too self-aware for that. plus he’s not that big of an asshole. instead, he quietly sulks for a while, retreating into his thoughts. this was supposed to be a moment of triumph for him, but there’s no denying that a daughter was never part of the plan.

however, his disappointment quickly turns to a different kind of interest. if there’s one thing kai thrives on, it’s the need to control. and a daughter? well, she would be something entirely different to mold, even if he hadn’t prepared for it. he might have initially imagined her as a liability, but the idea of raising a daughter with the same rigor as he would a son starts to grow on him.

he will insist on the name being gender-neutral or strong with masculine undertones—no feminine names like “lily” or “grace” here. if anything, he might give her a name like “phoenix,” “avery,” “billie” or “taylor”.

when kai first holds his daughter, it’s a totally unexpected reaction. he’s spent so much time convincing himself that this wasn’t what he wanted, that a son was the only option. but when she’s placed in his arms, tiny and fragile, all of those thoughts blur into nothing.

he looks down at her, and despite himself, there’s a tightening in his chest. he hadn’t expected to fall in love so quickly with this new life you’ve created together. it’s not like the way he loves his vision, his plans, or even his movement. it’s the first time in a long time he lets himself feel anything that isn’t centered on you or his own ambition.

he makes it clear that he will raise her to be tough. there’s no coddling in kai’s book. he’ll insist on teaching her discipline, perseverance, and how to manipulate situations in her favour, just as he would a son. she’ll learn to never show weakness, to never bow down.

kai would never ever admit it, but deep down, he’s fiercely protective of her—he will never let her be anyone’s victim. he’ll raise her to be a fighter.

[fairymint]

the fucking trollish urge that I have to send one of those 'sex starter gif' things, you click to it, and the website says oopsie!~<33 404 this page went missing woopsie byebye!

[stellar-skyy]

hello!! could i order an iced honey and vanilla tea for aventurine?

“order up! i have a drink here for aventurine, an iced honey and vanilla tea!”

☆ — if you're craving a drink, make sure to stop by the teashop!

i. SUMMARY: sometimes, all you need is to feel loved. and, as his closest friend, he will make sure you know you are. ii. CWS & NOTES: reader is insecure. platonic aventurine x gn!reader. hurt/comfort & fluff. 0.8k words. iii. A/N: i was so excited to see someone rq the platonic version of this prompt! also. please know this is my first time writing aventurine and i haven't played most of the penacony questline (i have been spoiled for the entire thing though-) so if the characterization is off i am sorry.

“Why are you friends with me?”

It caught Aventurine off guard, truth be told. For a moment he could only blink, staring at them dumbly while the question fully registered in his head. After a few seconds of processing, he managed a single word: “What?”

“Why are you friends with me?” They repeated, a tinge of frustration coating their words. The question settled in his mind, but still, he was at a loss for words.

How could he possibly answer that, when the two of them had been acquainted for so long that his life and theirs seemed fully intertwined? The question only planted the seed for more to sprout in his mind as he pondered it; whys melting into hows and what ifs. He struggled to imagine a life where he’d never met them all those years ago, a life where he never found someone to dull his sharpened edges and fill some fraction of the emptiness he felt inside.

They were a match that fit too perfectly; two lonely people, who’d tasted a life without solitude and couldn’t quite bring themselves to leave it behind again.

Yet, their friendship was a double-edged sword, one seemed to cut Aventurine from both sides. It took every ounce of self-control in his body to stop himself from digging his claws in and clinging tightly enough to them to make sure they wouldn’t leave. Simultaneously, another part yearned to push them so far away that he would never be able break them like he did with every other bright thing in his life. The thought of being alone again felt suffocating, even if the back of his mind still whispered that it was only his deserved fate.

On good nights, when they were at the tables with him, he insisted they were seated right beside him—his “good luck charm,” as he put it. He chased every moment, the flash of a smile on their lips when the dice roll just right, a barely stifled laugh at his jokes. No victory could outshine the few moments of pure, untainted contentment he felt when they were by his side.

It was almost laughable that they were questioning why he’d chosen them, when he was the one who didn’t deserve someone half as incredible as they were. He should be asking why they had settled for someone cracked and missing as many pieces as he did, not the other way around.

“What about you?” He asked, in lieu of an answer. “Why are you friends with me?”

“I already asked you.” They protested. Aventurine, being the good friend he was, ignored them.

“You’ve known me long enough to be acutely aware of my flaws, and yet you still stick around. Why is that?”

“Uh…” They hesitated for a beat. “You’re not—”

“Don’t deny it. Just answer the question.”

“Well, I guess…” They draw out the first few words, thinking. Aventurine kept his face neutral, despite the pounding of his heart. “Flaws are just flaws, aren’t they? I don’t think you could find a single one here that’s without their fair share. You’re still a good person despite them, and I enjoy your company regardless.”

The back of his throat had grown dry. He bit down on the inside of his cheek to quell the wave of emotions that almost swept him off his feet, forcing them back into the furthest reaches of his mind to unpack later.

“See!” He said, throwing his hands up in the air. “Exactly my point, why would you be any different?”

“That’s not what I was saying.” They murmured, shaking their head.

“What is it then?”

“It’s just… I’m not that important, am I?” They asked, not meeting his eyes. “I mean—You have other friends, don’t you? And if you had the choice, I’m sure you’d rather hang out with them than me, wouldn’t you?”

“You want to make that a bet?” Aventurine raised an eyebrow. “Because, my dear friend, that is a gamble you will lose. For starters, who I find important isn’t up to you; it’s up to me. And me has decided you are an incredibly important friend that I value very deeply. You can stew in your self-pity as much as you want, but that won’t change how much I care about you.”

“You really mean that?” They asked, in an almost inaudible whisper.

“Of course. Can I?” He asked, opening his arms out. They looked up briefly, and gave him a small nod, so he pulled them forward against his chest. He hugged them tightly, as if they would vanish into nothing if he let go. Their hand clutched the back of his jacket, their cheek pressing against his shirt.

Neither of them were without their cracks, it seemed, but maybe that was why they had connected in the first place.

“I’m friends with you because I want to be friends with you,” Aventurine said softly. “You mean the world to me, and it kills me that you don’t realize it.”

He knew he was little more than a hollow shell, but with them, he almost felt whole. It was almost enough for him; he could only hope it would be enough for them too.

reblogs and comments are appreciated! ♡

[ebonysplendor]

Prescription: LOVE (Demo) Review👨‍⚕️💊

TL;DR: I've got a head injury? I'm gonna need a doctor! How's my memory been? It's been fine. Wait, what? I've got a head injury? I'm gonna need a doctor! How's my memory been? It's been fine. Wait, what? I've got a head injury? I'm gonna need a doctor!

Game Link: https://livingslime.itch.io/prescriptionlove

Notable Features: Self-Insert, Yandere LI, gender neutral language, 2 endings Spiciness: 0/5 -- Don't get me wrong, it's not wholesome either, but this is the type of LI that'll make you say "But daddy, I love him!" even though something is clearly off. LI Red Flags: 2/5 -- Gaslighter, obsessive tendencies, overly "medicating" us DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT. HE'S SO SWEET. I CAN FIX HIM.

Wanna know more? Well, let's get into it!

Okay, not gonna lie, this review is long overdue, because I played this like...maybe 3 or 4 days after the initial drop, and here I am, like, 3 weeks later lmao.

Um...okay, you know what? I'm-- I'm not gonna push myself to write an intro this time lol. I mean, since when is it ever good to push yourself? ...Sometimes, the answer is sometimes, but you should never push yourself too hard, ya know? ...I'm getting off track.

I guess I could start by saying how I found this game on a total accident, and holy shit, am I glad that I found this game regardless. It was damn good, and...honestly, a little unnerving at times. Like, I'll tell you more about it later, but let me tell you, one part in particular had me genuinely spooked.

Anyways, before I get too far into my yap session, I'm going to go ahead and tell you about the game -- with as little spoilers as possible, of course. I mean, how would you be motivated to play the game otherwise unless I leave just enough suspense and mystery? Exactly, so allow me a moment to set the scene, and let's get into it.

So, boom.

We wake up...somewhere.

No, like you don't get it. Logically, it's like, duh, hospital, but we have a whole ass IV in our arm, a splitting headache, and it's almost painfully obvious that our memory took a hit, because we don't remember damn near anything, you feel me? We have, what is essentially, a hole where our memories are supposed to be, and the memories that we do have are so fragmented that they doesn't make any sense. Like...what the hell happened, ya know?

At this point, we're making things worse, because we're trying to force ourselves to remember something -- anything -- and our brain is just like "Mmm...nah. How about we panic, though? Let's do that instead." So, we do. We start feeling really anxious because it's like, how do we go from remembering everything one moment, blink, and then just...virtually no memories at all? Like, nothing? Like, we can't even recognize what a hospital looks like or even is.

"Hey, hey, it's okay".

Huh?

Oh! Oh, hello~! Could this be our boyfriend? Fiancé? Husband~?

"I'm Dr. Anselm."

I mean...he didn't say that he wasn't our husband, ya know? :3 Okay, wait, wait, no, stop, don't distract me. Let me get back on track.

Anyways, this tall gentleman helped us regain control of our nerves and informed us that we were perfectly safe and were currently in a hospital. Dr. Anselm basically told us that he has been overseeing our care and that he was the one in charge of our surgery.

...Wait, our fucking what?!

Before we get too freaked out, though, he tells us that we had some kind of accident that involved blunt force to our head which naturally caused a traumatic brain injury. He then tells us that, when we were brought it by the paramedics, we were in need of an emergency operation in order for us to live. Oh, and we had been asleep for two days straight. Well damn...

Imagine not remembering what you even ate for breakfast yesterday -- well, two days ago -- and this random man who claims to be a doctor comes out of the woodwork and tells you that you had brain surgery. If I could just reiterate once more...what the hell happened?!

Even still, admittedly, Dr. Anselm is being super gentle about the whole thing, and it's bringing a good amount of comfort and security, like everything is going to end up okay; he's even going to let us call our family to let them know that we've pulled through and that we're safe...even though, it's a bit off that no one's visited to start with.

No matter though, because it's past curfew anyways, and Dr. Anselm is adamant that we should rest first and call tomorrow. Fair enough. Rest is a part of recovery after all, and we'd rather get our memories back sooner versus later, not to mention that we actually are a little tired. Lmao, now here's when the issues start coming in...

See, we managed to fall asleep, but then the creak of the door woke us up. Now, at first, we're like "Meh, probably the nurses checking in or whatever", but the issue is, remember when I was like we felt a sense of comfort and security from Dr. Anselm? Lmao, this shit was far from comfortable, let alone safe. So, we make the mistake of we look at the door, and in the gap --

Lmao nah, ain't no way. We're hallucinating.

BRO, AIN'T NO FUCKING WAaaaAAAaAaAaaAAaY. WE ARE NOT HALLUCINA-- DoCTOr ANSEeEEeEEEeeeELM!!!!

Bro, we hit that call button so fast, but that thing also ran off just as fast before Dr. Anselm came rushing in. So, naturally, now we look like we're experiencing the side effect of delulu, because we're trying to explain that we saw something that was clearly not there, but it's like...bro, no, we know what the fuck we saw! Like, dude, please do something!

As always, Dr. Anselm's being super sweet and promised that he'd look into it and get someone to check the security cameras. He encourages us to try to go back to sleep so we don't disrupt our recovery, and, oddly enough, we're able to, even after that.

The next morning, comes along, and Dr. Anselm let's us call our folks, like promised, but...no answer. Hurtful, but okay. Dr. Anselm, also like promised, tells us that they checked the security cameras, and there was no one watching us from the door. Great. So, now we're two for two in this bitch. Perfect.

Still, leave it to Dr. Anselm to help us feel better, though, so it doesn't weigh on us too much for too long. He really is our knight in shining...lab coat.

Even though, with all that medicine he's been giving us...

Not to mention, we had this vividly weird dream...

And, sometimes, there's these weird little flickers in his expression when we ask certain questions or say certain things...

Is Dr. Anselm really trying to help us? Or...

...is it benefitting him that we don't know what happened to us?

Then again...

Nah, that's kind've delulu to think. He's done nothing but try to prioritize our health and recovery. We're safe. We can trust him. It the doctor's orders, after all, and he'd know what's best for us.

4 words: I CAN FIX HIM.

No, no, no, no, no, hear me out! I can fix this one! Like, the red flags are there, but I can FIX him! Is he the one that caused us to have a traumatic brain injury? Maybe. Is he over-medicating us? Possibly. Am I gonna overlook all of that? Absolutely. I mean, who cares that I have an intense suspicion that we're not actually in a hospital and that we're just in a basement that's staged to look like a hospital. Who hasn't played doctor before? I ain't gonna fault this man for trying to heal his inner child and playing pretend. Like, honestly? Good for him.

Okay, but no, enough of that. This...was really good! It physically hurts me that this game is not done yet, but I am so excited that this game isn't done yet, because I am anticipating the hell out of what is next to come. The developer really has a strong foundation, and I can only imagine how they're going to build on it.

The pacing is a little slow, but it's not a bad slow! It's literally seeping us into the story, and I honestly feel like the pacing could not have been executed any better than it has been. This flowed exactly how I feel a demo or prologue or intro or whatever you wanna call it should. I just know that whenever there's an update, shit is going to start getting real, and I cannot wait for that!

Let's talk about the environment/atmosphere...ooh bitch. Let me just say this, I can watch all of the horror movies in the world and be totally fine. I can watch let's plays of horror games and read scary stories...but I cannot be in the situation myself. Haunted houses/trails? Playing horror games myself? Shit scares me out of my soul. That being said, that part where it was talking about being watched through the crack of the door? Chills. Fucking chills. I don't know what it was, because that's not anything revolutionary, especially in these yandere games, but for some reason, the way that the dev executed it just hit different. And the art! Like did you see the CG?! Lmao nah, nah, let me remind you. Actually, let me zoom in on it.

Like, what the fuck is thaaaaaaaaat?! (╥ᯅ╥)

I didn't mention this, because I was narrating/summarizing, but I had genuine fear tears when I read through it the first time, and it was somehow worse when I had to grab and attach the screenshots and type through that part. Like, I HATE shit like this, bro! Like, just make it obvious! Don't put faces and figures and shit like that in the darkness and barely out of view to the point where you can't see it unless you focus on it!

I was literally squinting my eyes and reading fast as shit because I wanted to read it, but I wanted to get through it and away from this scene, but I also wanted to prep myself for a possible jumpscare. Like, developer. De-ve-lo-per. Pop off. This part was so good, and I loved/hated every second.

I'm doing that yap thing that I do again, so I'm going to save you from the rest of my ramblings and start winding down. If you do not already have this downloaded and ready to play, you have got to do that expeditiously. I am telling you, I know I say this about a lot of these visual novels, but this is one that I absolutely cannot allow you to miss out on. This one is so good! Just don't get too invested, because it's just a demo. I suggest going to the game's page, putting your pride aside, and beg for an update as soon as possible -- respectfully, of course. It should be common sense, but don't harass the dev for an update ... but damn, do I hope they come through with an update soon. Very soon. Tomorrow actually...today.

Anyways, here's the link. Go download it, and tell the dev that your life is theirs, because I'm honestly contemplating starting a cult in their honour. I'll sacrifice the nearest weeb for two extra lines of reading material in this visual novel. I'm serious. I'm yapping again...

Okay, anyways! Ending it for realsies this time. Again, I highly recommend giving this game a playthrough. Here's the link to the game page and download...again. If you're able to donate to the cause, donate to the cause, as I'm sure the dev would seriously appreciate the monetary support. Oh! And just as a "pro"-but-not-really-tip: for right now, the choices are more of an "illusion of choice". The endings will be worded the same no matter what, so there's no extra dialogue or CGs, or secret options, or anything like that. It'll just be dialogue pertaining to that specific answer choice at that specific time, and then it's not brought up or mentioned again after it's done.

And...that's it! Lol I'm finally done yapping. Big preesh for getting this far! Please remember to drink water, don't be dumb, and hope to see you around~!

Prescription: LOVE (Demo)

[smokeypeaches-and-honeyplums]

First i just wanna say your headcanons are seriously top notch, excellent work 👌. Ok now onto the actual request, could you do the NSFW alphaber for Macaque like you did for Redson? Don't forget to have a lovely day. 💙

What a way for me to return lmao. Thank you for the compliment, I tend to get self conscious about my writing.

You've heard it all before. Sorry for being inactive, I'm coming back, especially with the new specials coming out. I have more time on my hands. Gonna go through the box until I can start accepting again.

Edit post-s5: all is hell and I just need to cope atp what the FUCK was that season/pos

Reader is Gender-Neutral by default!

// NSFW!! MINORS DNI //

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

I like to imagine Macaque is very cuddly for aftercare. Tapping into his primal side, he's more possessive and protective. So, he holds onto you, petting you as he whispers in your ear, helping you down from subspace if he has to (or domspace if you topped).

Given he has portals, shadow travel and clones, he can get all your needs met without leaving you. So, you get cuddles AND resources provided. The perfect aftercare.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Macaque honestly doesn't like much about himself. He can talk the talk, looking as if he has a healthy or overbearing ego, but get him alone for long enough? He'll be second guessing how he even blinks

Exaggerating, of course

Point is, there's not much. A lot of it has been marred as well, so it makes it worse. Though, he's come to love his face. With or without the glamour, you've gotten this far with him and loved him through his roughest time. And it's one of the things you seemed to fall for

Besides, he's gotta admit, he does look a bit on the good side.

On you though, if you're Masc leaning, he loves your arms. Shows your strength and capabilities, and their nice to look at. It feels nice to be vulnerable in them

If you're Fem leaning, he'll admit, he's a bit of an ass guy. Ass and thighs, specifically. Their nice to lay on. And they also feel so nice between his fingers, against his hips...

Ahem.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Leaning into that more primal side, Macaque likes to mark you now and then. He isn't very fond of making messes, borderline germaphobe if you asked me, but there's a part of him that likes to make a mess out of you specifically, in such a way no one else could, in such an intimate setting

It gives him a sense of control and possession of something intimate he's honestly been lacking for... however long its been honestly

However, if you make big messes/are a squirter, he's eating that shit up, figuratively and literally

It's like ambrosia on his tongue

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Believe it or not? Macaque doesn't really have a dirty secret. None he would consider one, anyways.

But, a secret at ALL would be how Macaque really wants to be cherished. He DOES want to give up control to a degree, he's just scared of getting hurt again. You can only do so much to heal his soul, so when he DOES bottom, CHERISH it. He doesn't do it easy

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Can I say no? Not really?

Okay, well, not completely, but he's a quick learner

Macaque has been dead for however long it's been. And in that time, he definitely kept to himself A LOT. Hard to make connections when you're supposed to be, ya know, DEAD. So he didn't pick up much. But he did pick up SOMETHING

But, he's a quick learner. So don't worry too much. He does ask that you tell him if he's doing something wrong though, he doesn't wanna hurt you

That's the last thing he wants to do

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Honestly, in contrast to Redson, Macaque hates any position where you can see his face in turn. Sure, he loves to see yours, but contrary to popular belief, he HATES how he looks.

He knows how to fake it til he makes it, so that confidence is very exaggerated

But hey, at least he still gets to have a good show as he has his way with you

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He'll pop a joke now and again, don't get me wrong. Macaque isn't AS much of a hardass about it in comparison to how Redson would be about the moment. Though he doesn't want it completely ruined

He won't hesitate to make you laugh though. Especially if it helps ease tension

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He's a monkey. Hair goes crazy

Macaque never thought to really groom down there. I mean, why would he? He never expected to get to this point with anyone again.

So no, he's not really "well groomed," so I hope you don't mind fur in your mouth if you go to town on him in either regard on either side

He does develop a habit to get better groomed though.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Macaque is very intimate. He cherishes this, cherishes YOU. You mean so, so much. You've gotten this far with him, so he treasures you and whenever you guys get down and dirty, he does it with the intention of love making.

No primal urges

No biting (unless you want to, that is)

Just pure and utter devotion.

Maybe it's because it's all he's known, but it's how he shows his love to you. Praise and devotion.

uh- where were we again?

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Macaque only really starts to masturbate proper when he gets in a relationship with you and start to get intimate (or just, getting intimate in general if you're just fwb)

Don't get me wrong! It's not like he HASN'T touched himself before. He's a demon at the end of the day, urges happen

It just increased in frequency when he got tangled up with you

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Honestly? BDSM. Especially Bondage. Bondage specifically on you, though. For... obvious and not so obvious reasons

Roleplay! He's an actor, he's dramatic, he's a theater kid. He's gotta put it somewhere, right?

He's very partial to oral and might even have an Asphyxiation kink, in regard to both of you. Especially you though. And, in moderation so neither of you get hurt

Likes to use his clones on you now and again. It's fun to see

Would you believe me if I said he has a slight Exhibition kink? Listen to my vision-

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

As far away from FFM as possible /hj

Macaque prefers it to be somewhere he can have you to himself. In the future, or some point in time, he could entertain the idea of sharing. Maybe. But until then, no one gets to see the faces you make.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Macaque is a simple man/demon. Anything on average to get ANYONE going would get him going

Show a bit of skin in the right places, curve a certain way, bend over in front of him

He's a simple man/demon. He's allowed to give in to his vices when he's tempted by the likes of you

If you're Masc leaning, he'll start to get going just from seeing your arms and muscles flex, even if you're doing something simple. He folds easy

If you're Fem leaning, anything that shows off your ass and/or thighs has him weak in the knees and absolutely unable to keep his hands to himself. He folds easy²

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Macaque absolutely REFUSES to be bound. He'll entertain the idea of holding himself back, but he REFUSES to have his legs and arms bound. For, again, obvious and not-so obvious reasons

Macaque REFUSES to hurt you in any way beyond the asphyxiation. He regards you in such a high light, that he refuses to purposefully hurt you. It'd destroy him, no matter how much you would tell him its okay, no matter the context. So no knifeplay, bloodplay, or anything of that sort.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Macaque's asphyxiation kink purely stems from oral, I am gonna be honest

He'dchokeonthestrap

He prefers to give than to receive, but if offered, he'll DEFINITELY take the chance. You didn't hear that from me though

He also likes the praise he gets from it too, but again, didn't hear that from me

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

If you couldn't tell from how much I say it, Macaque revels in you as a whole, so he likes to take it slow.

He tends to take things slow, no matter what it is, so you better best believe that he is taking his time with you. He'll squeeze in some teasing too to make you feel good

He wants to savour you

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Just because Macaque wants to savour you, doesn't mean he can't also have appetizers now and again

He'll have a quickie now and again, but don't be surprised if he asks for more. But it's also not impossible for it to be enough for him, so if he needs to get off, he'll settle

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

If you can't tell, the answer is No. For most things

Macaque is still willing to experiment, don't get me wrong, but he has very set boundaries for what area he'll be willing to experiment with and what he won't.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

Look at him. Look at him and tell me you don't think he wouldn't be able to LAST.

Macaque's capable of a lot of things in and out of combat, so he definitely has the Stamina to last. Honestly, I have a general headcanon that demons, especially more powerful ones, have tons of stamina.

Have fun walking if you teased him :D

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

Toys are a possibility. Macaque doesn't own em, so you'd have to bring them into the fray first.

Tease him though, and watch him melt in your hands when you get him to bottom. He makes the sweetest sounds

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Macaque's only unfair if you're unfair. And he'll always return the favor tenfold, no matter how badly you teased him. It's only fair, right? And besides, it's not like he's the only one that makes such sweet sounds

But trust, if Macaque starts teasing, you're in for a LONG night

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Macaque has sensitive hearing, if you couldn't tell, but that makes it all the better to him

He loves to growl in your ear if he tops, hear his pants and moans as he makes both of you feel good, hitting that spot you told him felt so good that one time, feeling you cling to him

And when he bottoms? He goes the full fucking MILE

Macaque is LOUD when he bottoms. If he's being this vulnerable, he might as well go all out. So he WHINES, he CRIES and by the great sage, does he MOAN.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Macaque's a dom-leaning switch, if you couldn't tell by now from what I've been implying, only bottoming once he's comfortable enough to and with his initiation the first go around

Also, whenever he teases, I like to imagine he likes to use his shadow abilities for various ideas (with your approval, of course). This includes Bondage, his clones, transformation. I mean, shit, sky's the limit

I also like to think he's not very good with the usual things at first. Things like dirty talk, foreplay, stuff like that. He will ask for guidance. He doesn't wanna fuck it up with you

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

I can FINALLY talk about it

Macaque's not some "well-endowed" sex master, so he's not gonna be packing some star-seeing dick either. Well, he could, when he knows how to use it

The guy's above average, at 7.1 inches and 5 in. in width lacking in curvature. He's never thought anything of it, since he never needed to use it often

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Demons have a naturally high libido, and Macaque is no different.

Same as I said with Redson, Macaque isn't some raging, horny demon just because of the type of demon he is. He can be primal, but he has control over it

Entertain it though...

Have mercy on your legs

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

Once Macaque finishes for the night (or, however long,) he can be seen almost passing out. He'll make sure you're fine, hence why he kinda leans on his clones to care for you while he cuddles into you, but he kinda crashes out once he's officially spent. A bad habit of his

[smytherines]

ok most agree if the roles were swapped owen would go back for curt. but lets say, hypothetically, for whatever reason, he DOES end up leaving curt. how would curt react??

(is this just an excuse to try and get my hcs validated? yes)

also, happy birthday!!!!

Oh shit, this is a juicy one

I really don't know, but I'm gonna workshop it anyways. So I'm a firm adherent of the ADHD Agent Mega headcanon, and a big part of ADHD for a lot of us (myself included) is rejection sensitive dysphoria, just an extreme reaction to rejection, criticism, and embarrassment. I think RSD would lead to a lot worse of an immediate reaction for Curt if Owen left, but also might result in him blaming himself for Owen leaving?

I guess it really depends on the circumstances too- like if everything stays exactly the same (Curt sets the timer too early, Curt drops the banana peel) except Curt slips on his own banana peel and Owen leaves, I could definitely see Curt blaming himself and really having a breakdown over it. Like possibly to some very not good ends. Either him doing something extreme, or Chimera being able to leverage that into having total control over him.

If there's a different sequence of events, where it's more of a neutral issue that leads to his fall and Owen doesn't go back for him, then I could see him becoming vengeful. Curt is kinda shown to be jealous and petty in A1P1. I think he's a deeply insecure person (for understandable reasons) who covers that up with an excess of bravado. So Owen leaving him would just kind of confirm what he already believes about himself deep down inside, except all of that self-hatred gets externalized towards Owen because Curt can't really reckon with it, if that makes sense?

I dunno, this is the first one that has really tripped me up. I've honestly never thought about it before because in my mind there's no way Owen doesn't go back for Curt, so this is a really interesting thought exercise. I'd be curious to know what you think!

[acourtofquestions]

Favorite character from Throne of Glass so far? And try to guess mine 😜

Ooh, a good question! One that I actually have an answer to; despite the fact my answer really is all of them😂 (well all minus the obvious ones your NOT supposed to like; Arobynn, Maeve, Rourke Farran, the Blackbeak Matron, etc.) and while I am going to try & self-edit (something I’m terrible at, as any glance at my blog will show😂) the easiest explanation I have is probably this:

I will always utterly adore Fleetfoot like no other. Same with Abraxos. And Elide (who I seem to be in agreement with the characters; we would die for that cinnamon roll😂)

Fenrys snuck up on me & I’m still figuring it out, but I think he’s funny, and very charismatic/compassionate.

Asterin Blackbeak has really grown to have such a joy-filled place in my heart. & I really enjoy the 13’s dynamic & badassery. So, of course Manon is on there too (from the first introduction when I was like… she’s killing people… but somehow I like her? To now being the child of peace, the hope & heart of the “heartless”).

Aedion (despite our occasional moments of a tiff) I love the way he loves. Dorian (I don’t think we share an opinion on this one, which is totally okay) I just really appreciate his mind! Chaol was for a while then the opposite, right now I think I’m positive neutral-ish? … I can pretty much always find things to love in main/side/random characters.

And don’t get me started on Sam Cortland… that man… always beloved😭

Lysandra Ennar (despite that EoS plotted ending lol😅😅) I love her, I love the way she loves her found family, I love her sisterhood with Evangeline (esp. dear to me in my own life), & I appreciate the way her trauma is NOT her entire story.

Rowan Whitethorn (who funny enough was NOT a favorite for a while; twas a rough start but once I loved him, (& will never) not love him).

And now dwindled down to the answer of all answers, beyond even this series or Maasverse (of all fandoms this & she have become an all-time fav) Aelin Galathynius; I almost can’t explain it & would just say READ 8 BOOKS & you’ll get it😂 she’s such an arc & fleshed out character, a kind I don’t see often (especially in powerful female character personalities when a main character or any role for that matter) she makes sense to me, there’s a lot beyond the surface, she & that have meant a lot to me in my own life/trauma/grief & (much like the MANY characters that fall for her for this same reason) she's just something else; wild, fiery, witty & hilarious, impossibly smart, sharp but king, empathetic/understanding & compassionate, fiery yet controlled, deep-feeling & loving, bold & somehow joyful, brave (even if afraid), & very much the force of life & humanity & falling in love with living. She’s the (fire) heart of the story for a good reason.

Now, as far as your favorite goes THAT'S is a very good question (one that I will also leave in your ask box in case it’s easier; whichever works best for you whether here or there :-) is it cheating to have glanced at your blog previously?😂 … okay, so, I’m going to guess based on that & conversations plus general vibes Manon, Rowan, or Aelin. Less so the latter, esp. as I think it just vibes a little more (idk why… total guess here😂😝)? I definitely think your questions/thoughts are very well-put & intelligently written, plus fun & kind… so I’m leaning towards Rowan more so because of the amount of heart & “a dreamer's heart” he does have? We’ll see, regardless I have no doubt it’s a great one & can’t wait to hear it😆 so, thanks SO much for the double fun ask!!😊🫶

[the-soul-of-a-morningstar]

It's time for matchup! Sorry my English, it's not my native language.

Sexuality: demisexual and pansexual

Gender: genderfluid

Personality:

I often become the voice of reason in situations where everyone around is too emotional and acting impulsively. I also take a calm and thoughtful approach to problems and try to think about and analyze them neutrally and without unnecessary emotions. This quality helps me help someone find a solution to their problems, or at least support them emotionally. I have a high thirst for justice and I have a moderate empathy for others, and I can take action to help someone. I am careful not to open up to people right away, but study them well before doing so (although this has a negative side in the form of my extreme distrust, but I will write about this later). Despite my laziness, I can be full of inspiration and enthusiasm for things that interest me and very quickly learn something related to the subject of my interest, or direct my enthusiasm in a positive direction. I have a courage and independence, which I "charge" others with. I also have a sense of humor that my friends like (although not everyone likes my sense of humor). I am caring and attentive to those who are dear to me, and I try to act for their comfort. Loyalty to those I care about is also my strong point. I consider myself an optimist, but I also take into account the real facts.

People quite often really annoying me with their emotionality and a lot of different misconceptions that are in their minds (I deal with this very often, unfortunately). Against this background, I often look down on those around me, although I do not show it. This sounds a bit hypocritical against the background of the fact that irritability and short temper are also my traits that I (sometimes) find difficult to control. I have very big problems with trust, it's not easy for me to open up to others. I rarely show my real emotions, even to those with whom I am close, and try to appear calm. Another problem is my laziness and procrastination. I'm very sarcastic with people I don't like, or when I'm just in a very bad mood. I also have moments of low self-confidence. And finally, sometimes I get jealous.

My life and mind are very chaotic - I have a habit of changing plans quickly, and for this reason I try not to make plans even for the next day.

I don't notice social signals well and sometimes don't understand whether some people's emotions are true or not and what certain hints mean (people need to tell me directly what they think or feel, otherwise I probably won't understand and guess it).

Love Language: words of affirmation and physical touch. I can tell my mate a lot and often how much I love them, reminding them of this more often, I try to come up with pleasant affectionate nicknames, and I realy like praise them! I can compliment their positive traits to cheer them up and boost their self-esteem. Usually my affectionate nicknames are words that I associate with this person in a good way. I also often hug my mate and stroke them. I really like hugging. I have no problem with showing affection in public, and I even like to do it.

Likes: coffee, spicy food, video games (I mostly like RPG), science fiction and fantasy (books, movies, cartoons, anime, video games - it doesn't matter), astronomy, psychology, birds, reptiles, dinosaurs, dragons (my favorite kind of mythical creatures, although dragons are now very diverse and unusual in popular culture), cold weather, night, winter, unusual inventions (it's even funny - when I see some real person or character succeeding in creating some technologies and inventions, I immediately feel an interest in them and their inventions), new discoveries in science

Dislikes: hot weather, bright sun and light, stinging insects, people who are too fanatical and confident in their rightness, yandere (I really don't understand why everyone loves this type of character so much)

Hobbies: I am good at writing texts and composing stories, I like to come up with the plots of my stories and make their text pleasant to read. I also like to draw, but it's harder for me than writing. In drawing, I prefer to use a technique, that is, a drawing tablet with a screen, rather than paper and pencils. I also like to spend time playing video games and reading books or watching some movies and anime (my favorite genres are related to fantasy and science fiction… And when it comes to video games, I prefer RPG). I also like to study things related to my interests - astronomy, psychology, birds, reptiles.

Aesthetic/Style/Overall Vibe: I'm not quite sure what that means… well, I prefer a combination of several colors, usually black with some other color (for example, blue) in clothes, if that's what it's about. Did I understand correctly what this means?

Character preferences: Characters I DO NOT want to be paired with: Valentino (I really hate him), Adam, Lute (I won't be able to get along with them), Niffty.

a/n: Just a note, what I meant by ‘Aesthetic/Style/Overall Vibe’ was like clothing style - It helps me imagine ya a lot better y’know?

Husk

Due to your short-temper, but also your factual mindset, I think Husk would be a good fit for you. You both have similar traits and similar ways of thinking, and despite the fact that both of you have some pretty shitty trust issues, you both know that you can trust eachother.

Husk admires your creativity when it comes to literature and art in general, though, he doesn’t necessarily understand most aspects of it, he does think it’s sorta endearing that you have things your proud to do and show off, y’know?

I can see Husk being into words of affirmation, as he’s not really afraid to say it how it is, and he doesn’t really have shame in saying that he loves you. Husk isn’t too into the public part in PDA, not that he’s not affectionate in public, simply he just doesn’t see a reason to be, nonetheless, best believe he’s awfully cuddly behind closed doors, he’s a cat after all!

Runner-Ups: Charlie, Lucifer, Cherri Bomb

@the-soul-of-a-morningstar : please do not copy, repost or translate onto any other platform.

[bloggingboutburgers]

Hi, I know you're catching a lot of flak right now for your comic, and I just want you to know that it's justified. Saying that you need a seperate pride without kink to "feel safe" is actively homophobic. Everything you described happening at the "good pride" also happens at normal pride just alongside the parties. Gay kinksters CREATED pride, we literally wouldn't be allowed to celebrate it without them. You can't give conservatives even an inch on this. "there should be prides without kinks for people like me" may be the extent of your thoughts but it is so easy for others to jump off from there into "all prides should be without kink" and other measures to control queer bodies in public. Please do some research into the origins of pride and see if you can still stand by your mistake

I'm actually not catching a lot of flak, I thought I was gonna, but people are being understanding of what I'm trying to mean, and I'm very grateful for that!

I didn't want to picture any specific pride as "good" or "bad", sorry if it came across this way, that means I did my drawing job badly. All I wanted to do was give visibility for my own experience.

Apologies also if I came across as homophobic – please know that wasn't my intention either, although I've kind of got that before – being called homophobic for being asexual and having my own needs be about... Welp, not needing sex, and not needing romance, while the goal of most other orientations is to show OTHER kinds of sex and romance. I want to believe these aren't incompatible goals, but I guess sometimes they can be.

...What I should say is, if we're going there, saying an asexual person doesn't have the right to want to feel safe and included in SOME LGBTQIA+ events seems pretty aphobic to me.

I 100% agree with your point that sadly there will definitely be conservatives who'll take this need as "all prides should be without kink", or take comics like these the wrong way. But I think if you're accusing me of saying exactly that, instead of the nuanced and more neutral message I'm trying to give, you're basically falling into the same mentality as they are. I believe for there to be intelligent progress for human rights for everyone, people should be able to read between the lines and understand that there are complexities that should be taken into account. If they can't take into account these complexities without ruining it all for everyone, then that leaves me with little hope for any of us to begin with.

As far as the origins of pride are concerned, I'm not denying that at all either, and that should be recognized. Again, like – I think it's absurd that we live in a world that's so explicitly heterosexually kinky on a 24/7 basis (in our movies, our TV shows, our ads, our societal habits, ALL of it) and that some people are trying to say LGBTQI+ people shouldn't be allowed to be explicitly kinky in the same way. All I'm saying is – for sex-repulsed asexuals like me, not being kinky IS what feels safe, and if I can't find events where I can feel that kind of safety, and where I have to force myself to smile and nod to stuff that makes me feel unsafe no matter where I go, I'm pretty much in the same self-repressed situation as I'm in every day in a heteronormative world. Hence why I said I'm glad pride has come so far that some of them can be inclusive even for people like me. That such things can coexist. That I believe they should.

I should also note (I might be wrong on this, please anyone correct me if I am) that asexuality as an orientation started actively being coined in the US only in the 70s (and that came much later in a majority of other countries), and we got our first flag only in 2010. Which means the first prides by nature could not be inclusive for us because we were too scared/repressed by societal norms to even have come out yet. And just like (in my country at least) what was formerly called "Gay pride" is now called simply "Pride", and just like the pride flag has evolved to include more minorities and realities of experiences within the LGBTQIA+ community, I believe it's a good thing if prides can also evolve in that sense. It has become our tradition by now as a community largely speaking, and I think traditions ought to know to evolve as well – if they didn't none of us would be allowed to exist at all and we'd all be still stuck in hetero norms. Maybe in the future things will evolve to the point where there's a variety of prides that cater more to some orientations than others (I think that may be already happening?). And maybe, hopefully, someday in the future, prides as a way to raise awareness won't be needed at all anymore because people already know and accept it. Though sadly we're still not at that point now...

...With that said, to conclude, I ought to give the Paris Pride another chance again focusing on like, before the parade begins, or after it concludes, to mainly attend the conferenes and speeches and whatnot and find what works for me in those those. Maybe that's the better way for me to experience this.

[defiedlife]

HC: AVENTURINE ; BLESSED BY...?

Sunday: "Do the Avgins have any ability to read, tamper with, or manipulate one's own or another's mind?" Aventurine: No. Does it matter?

Contrary to what the interrogation scene told us at first glance, I will be keeping my headcanon that Aventurine's eyes are capable of hypnotizing another person.

I can't recall if I've stated the caveats to this on my blog or just in dms to a few people ooc, so I'll put them here now for clarity's sake. These stipulations are in place to prevent godmodding ooc, as well as an ic choice: Aventurine's eyes are capable of hypnotizing someone if and when he chooses, but only if the ability is utilized deliberately and alongside a verbal command or commands, and eye contact is maintained while a command is given. As a personal rule of his, he detests this ability and uses it sparingly; usually only if he feels he has no choice or if his target gives him informed consent.

During the interrogation, Aventurine denies that Avgins—as in, all Avgins in general, because Sunday kept the question broad—have any kind of ability to read or manipulate another person's mind. It's my take on it that Aventurine's answer was just barely technically true, but also not the full truth either. Not all Avgins have or had such an ability, but he does, and I'd go so far as to speculate that Sunday understands that as well after asking the question, given the way he visibly reacts to the answer. The devs and animators of hsr use body language extensively to help tell the story when possible, and this was one of those times.

Sunday's expression and mannerisms were fairly neutral during the questioning process until that answer, which tells me it was the first answer that at least came close to a lie, with Sunday's subtle nod and sudden smug expression very much reading as a nonverbal "gotcha" moment in my opinion.

Thus, working under the assumption that Aventurine alone has that kind of ability, it stands to reason that it's actually part of his blessing from Gaiathra Triclops. The story tells us repeatedly that he is blessed by her, and that her gift to him is the source of his uncanny good luck. Directly from his younger self, we also learn that "pretty eyes are a gift from Mama Fenge," aka Gaiathra, as told to him by his older sister.

I may be reading too much into it, but that almost—almost—sounds to me as if his eyes are a rarity even among Avgins, and that if we were to ever see full art of any member of his family up close with their eyes visible, his eyes would not match theirs. (Slight supporting tangent worth noting—he's extremely sentimental, going to great lengths to keep the good luck charm from his mother and his father's old shirt, yet not once does he liken his eyes to either of theirs in remembrance.)

Therefore, his eyes are a physical representation of his blessing, a direct gift from Gaiathra, and grant him the ability to directly manipulate another person if he so chooses. If you've seen some of the popular theories surrounding Aventurine lately, you've probably already guessed where I'm going with this. Until further notice (aka until canon proves me wrong), I will be adhering to theory that Gaiathra Triclops is/was actually Ena, the Aeon of Order.

Ena is described as a control freak, and though ancient civilizations often flourished under them, those same civilizations and planets would always shine brightly and briefly before an inevitable total collapse into ruin. (Sigonia, anyone?)

Not only that, but the eye that physically represents Ena (because the rest is just a puppet that they control) is a perfect match to Aventurine's own eyes. It's uncanny, just like his luck. At first glance, the concepts of "luck" and "order" could be viewed as total opposites—luck is completely random, in theory. But from a different perspective, when so much of life itself is random except for the predetermined end of death, an unnatural degree of luck conversely brings a certain level of order and certainty to it all, if only in the wielder's favor.

If this "blessing" ultimately comes from Ena, I could even go so far as to say that Aventurine is an Emanator of Order and simply isn't aware of it. It would explain his eyes, the ability he possesses through them, and his luck.

Also worth noting, before I wrap this post up—in the very first flashback scene of Aventurine's pov during 2.1, his mother lets a little something slip, referring to him as "a gift from THEM to Avgin," and still presumably referring to Gaiathra with the all-caps pronoun. If Gaiathra can referred to as both "SHE" and "THEM," that makes her sound a lot like an Aeon, doesn't it? Food for thought.

[saintheartwing]

Invader Zim: The Terror of the Pies!

THE TERROR OF THE PIES!

"Hello. I'm Michael White." White says, waving at you all. "Once again I welcome you to a viewing of a show entirely dedicated to the downfall of Civilization as we know it!"

"He of course refers to MY show." Zim says, standing next to White, grinning happily.

"Yeah, well you ain't gonna remember any of this. We're breaking the fourth wall and once the show starts, you'll be your usual, incompetent self!" White laughs, smacking him over the head.

"OW! Do not touch me with your FILTHY Halfling hands!" Zim snaps, hissing at him.

"Right, right. Now there's been a lot of talk about whether or not the people in this show are evil. Now, lots of people are BAD, I guess. Zim's bad. But unlike him, he could never hope to be as chaotically neutral as I am. You see folks, he's what we call "Incompetent Lawful Evil"."

"Right." Zim says, smiling and closing his eyes as he nods. Then his eyes shoot open and he wheels on White. "HEEEEYYY!"

"Dib's not evil either. Actually Zim and Dib both see themselves as just doing a job that has to be done, a job nobody else can do...the job of protecting Earth and INVADING it. They're "good guys" on different sides. Gaz though, is a heroic sociopath, but she's not really EVIL either. Red and Purple, I'm not too sure about…they're kind of…dumb…so I'm gonna hafta do some research." White shrugs. "But enough talk of such a stupid and warmongering race! On with the show!"

"STUPID?!"

…

…

…

…it was the 2nd year since Tenn's disastrous attempt to wage war against the Meekrob. War waged over the surface of the planet and Tallest Red and Purple had directed their armada and their main army forces there to fight the Meekrob threat. The whole area was divided up between the Resisty-supported Meekrob and the Irken army, though the Irkens didn't control nearly as much of the planet as they wanted, and their Armada was BARELY holding up against the Resisty's crippling cannon fire, leaving an Orbital Sweep simply out of the question! The coastal outposts were deserted…except for people. In fact, despite the threat of invasion and the CONSTANT blackouts, the Tallest and Erin still took their evening constitutionals.

"Ahh, hat a nice evening, don'tcha think, Red?" Tallest Red laughed as he walked along the cliffs that overlooked the ocean near their main ocean lab where Erin was doing deep-sea-research on a way to sneak over to Meekrob bases via the sea. To ensure his beloved's security, Invader Darth had been called in from his "vacation" (nudge-nudge-wink-wink) to look after Erin and he had instantly taken to her kind and sweet attitude.

"Hey, Pur…could you hold my elephant gun?" Purple asked. He was doing some part-time lab work at the lab with Erin and getting to know her better. Grinning, he held up a gun for his buddy to hold onto.

"I don't know WHY you brought it here, you can't shoot elephants here on Meekrob, you know!" Tallest Red told him, putting one hand on his hips while raising a claw in the air.

"Why the hell not?!" Purple snapped, looking irritated.

"For ONE, they're out of season!" Red explained.

"Wait…so I'm gonna hafta eat Meekrobian pelican for dinner again?" Purple moaned. "They're ALL mouth!"

"I'm afraid that's just the way it is!" Red said sadly, shrugging.

"Then I'll risk it. I'll shoot an elephant out of season!" Purple muttered, grabbing the gun out of Red's hands and heading off in a huff.

Those of you who have been paying close attention as to WHERE this story takes place will of course, realize that Red and Purple are talking absolute rubbish! There are no elephants in Meekrob. There ARE plenty of them in Foodcourtia though, northwest of a line drawn between two points, thus making it the shortest distance!

"Darn you, Nick…well, if that's how it is I can't shoot any! I've got a restraining order from Sizz-Lorr!"

"Why?" Red asked.

"He doesn't allow PDAs in his shop." Red mumbled.

"And I'm banned too. I went into the ladies room." The blind-eyed Darth added sadly.

"Now I'm sure it was an accident-"

"I went in there FIVE TIMES." Darth mumbled, hanging his head.

"It beats what White did." Purple remarked.

"Yeah, what I did to Trenton is the reason why the phrase "This used to be a nice place to live" was invented." White remarked, jabbing his thumb at his chest proudly as he popped up and grinned.

FWIP!

White frowned, looking around. "Did you just hear that?"

"Hear what?" Purple inquired as they headed off to the left, going towards the lab.

"Sounded like a…gas door slamming…" White mumbled. "But who would be walking around with a gas oven?"

"Betty Crocker?" Erin mused, laughing. It was getting darker and darker out…and it was rather hard for all them to see, actually. Save for Darth, who was blind.

"BESIDES her!" White asked.

TWHOOSH!

SPLAT!

" Oooooooooooohohohohohohohohohohoh yeuhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!" Erin hollered, hitting the ground as most of the others kept on walking forward, not realizing what had happened.

"If you're trying to do an elephant call, you're not doing it from the throat right!-" Red began, turning around…and he saw in horror that Erin was on the ground.

"Oh my GOD, what hit me!? Call the guards or the cops or something!" She shouted.

Red nodded, looking around. "HELP! HELP! POLICE! GUAAARDS!" He cried out.

A few moments later Skoodge whistled, getting their attention. White saw his son approaching and blinked. "Skoodge!? what are you doing here?"

"Tenn's been very moody and stuff lately..." Skoodge admitted. "So I thought some time off from her would be good. What's the problem, My Tallest?"

"I was struck down from behind!" Erin moaned, holding her head.

"What with?"

"I don't know, I can't see, and I think my back's been bruised!" Erin complained.

"What FIEND would dare hurt my lady?!" Darth hissed angrily, his eyes glowing for a moment.

"I can't see ANYTHING in this lack of light!" Red admitted, squinting his eyes.

"So strike a match!" Erin begged .

"We have RULES." Red said. "We're in a blackout currently, and the enemy needs light to focus their targets on. We can't just "strike a light"."

"Then…strike a dark light!" Erin snapped. "SOMETHING!"

"We daren't!" Red said in a dramatic tone. "Why, only twenty miles across the bay, there's an Meekrob-run base that's watching our base intently!" He said, pointing across the sea.

"Don't be stupid!" White muttered. "They can't possibly see a MATCH being struck!" he snapped, crossing his arms.

"Oh, all right, fine! If you don't believe them…" Skoodge sighed as he dove into his pocket and quickly pulled out a box of matches. Taking a match, he got it lit with a quick striking motion on the striker stick, and then…

BUDDA-BOOOOM!

An explosion blew up a nearby tree and the shockwave sent their hair flying to the direction of the ocean while the match's light was blown out.

"Any OTHER questions?" Red inquired.

"I don't think I can feel my legs!" Erin moaned.

"Do you believe me NOW?! Are you aware of the danger of the Meekrob's long range guns?" Purple asked, raising a claw in the air and waggling it.

"Fine. Luckily for you guys…" White dove into his jacket and pulled out a small box. "I have a box of matches I snuck from a one of their bases!"

"Not bad, albino freak!" Red said, patting White on the shoulder. "Go on, strike one! They wouldn't fire at their own matches!"

"Of course not!" White said happily as he held one aloft. He struck it…

BUDDA-KROOOOM!

"…curses…THE RESISTY!" Red hissed as he and his buddy Purple hung from the tree they'd been knocked into. Erin was now on HER SIDE, cuckoo birds flying around her.

Well, they thought about using a candle, but it wouldn't have been very bright, and they didn't DARE light it and since they were afraid of moving an injured person, they waited 9 hours until sunrise and there they saw what had hit Erin. It was…A CHERRY PIE.

BGM: Dramatic chord of notes!

"…HMM…" Skoodge felt the pie. "It's still warm!"

"PHEW. I HATE cold pie!" Erin remarked. "Can you lift me up now?"

Lifting her up, Skoodge rubbed his chin. "I'll have to take note of this." He remarked. "A sinister pie-hurler is on the loose!"

"Maybe it's GIR." Erin suggested. "It sounds like something stupid he'd do."

"No, I got a call from Nick. He's busy being a poker player." White said. "He's quite good too."

"Really?"

"Yep. Give him a poker and he'll play any tune you like on it!"

"Ah." Erin nodded.

"Well then, I'm off!" Skoodge said, turning to the right and walking off…

"Goodbyyyyeeeeeeeeekkkk!"

…the cliff. WOOPS!

SPLOOOOSH!

"Oooh, look! A dolphin's coming to rescue no, it's a shark! It LOOKS like a dolphin. Tricky fish! TRICKY FISH!" Purple proclaimed.

…

…

…

…after swimming back to shore, Skoodge dried himself off to save time. As he headed back to his home, he wondered WHY anybody would want to strike somebody with a pie? So he decided to ask the man on the street.

"So, do you like pie?" He asked an Irken in the street who was leaning against a lamp post in the early morning.

"Pie?" The Irken grunt's head snapped up. Then he began to walk around like a zombie, chanting over and over. "Pie, pie, we like pie. Pie, pie, we like pie."

More people suddenly ambled out of the buildings nearby, joining him in a long line and chanting as well. "Pie, pie, we like pie! Pie, pie, we like pie!"

Skoodge blinked as a HUGE throng of people moved down the streets, heading for the sunset. "PIE, PIE, WE LIKE PIE! PIE, PIE, WE LIKE PIE!"

"…oh…kaaaaay…" Skoodge muttered, rolling his eyes as he headed back towards his house. Not much else happened that day…except he was suddenly struck with a peach pie. THWOCK!

"It's all rather confusing, y'know…" VENT said as he sat atop a mailbox as Skoodge walked inside his house, dripping in Pecan pie.

In the days to come, thirty eight fruit pies were hurled at Miss Nightshade.

"YEEEOOOWWW! WILL YOU STOPTHAT?! WHOEVER YOU ARE?!"

A madman was at large, In desperation...DIB was called in. But...not by choice.

"I require your help." Invader Skoodge told Dib as he stood in Dib's room, the door locked. It had been simple enough to teleport inside thanks to White assisting him. Dib was frankly AMAZED at the whole spectacle, but also...annoyed. HELP? An IRKEN?!

"What?" He asked stonily.

"I need your assistance. Nobody has been able to catch the one hurling these pies. He's moving in and out of our bases and past ALL security. This has made the Tallest suspect...paranormal intervention. You are a paranormal investigator. If you assist me I will not harm you. I have no real reason to bring harm upon you, Dibbun Membrane. Useless violence will not bring either you, nor I, closer to our goals."

"I'm NOT helping you." Dib spoke angrily, grabbing Skoodge's arms. "I'm throwing you into my closet and putting THREE PAIRS of sleep cuffs-"

"You leave me no choice then." Skoodge said softly. He quickly broke out of Dib's hold and grabbed HIS wrists.

"AAA!" Dib screamed in pain. "What are you doing?!"

"Crushing your fragile human bones, little one." Skoodge intoned. "But I will give you one more chance. Do as I say and you'll be spared."

"RRR..." Dib grit his teeth in pain, then finally nodded. Skoodge let go and nodded. "Fine. If I DO Help you?" Dib inquired.

"Oh, I will make it worth your while." Skoodge said. "Say...with a piece of Irken technology so advanced that they will HAVE to call you sane?"

Dib rubbed his chin. "Find a ghost that hurls pies in exchange for advanced alien technology?...I can live with working with your kind for that. But I'll need a disguise."

"Taken care of." White said, entering the room and holding up a holographic image inducer.

"This pie-hurler must be stopped. He's made FOOLS of us Irkens!" Skoodge growled.

"I disagree, you were fools long before he came along." White laughed.

SOME TIME LATER...

"Now, from the splatter-impact of the pies...they were obviously thrown by hand." Dib said, disguised as a blue-eyed Irken with a dark cloaked-jacket and a tool belt with various technological equipment for use in "Phantom Pie Hurler-Hunting".

"Not necessarily. some people are pretty clever with their feet." Purple added. "You should see Sizz-Lorr! He can fry TEN slydoodeedoos with his feet!"

"Which is why they always taste like feet." Red realized out loud.

"...brilliant." White groaned.

"Now...these PIES, were they all identical. They all used fruit." "Dab" went on. "EXCEPT...for THIS one." He added, holding up the remains of the latest pie. "There was a BOOT in it."

"Ahhh. So the dreaded hurler is a military man!"

"And as it were the The 1st Heavy Underwater Artillery. Happens to live right near where Erin keeps getting attacked!" Red realized. "Dab, Skoodge...I want you to go there at once and arrest the first Irken you see wearing one boot!" He demanded as-

SPLAT! A pie flew in through the window and hit Dib.

"...I hate all of you so very much."

…

…

…

… "I assure you, this is absolutely ridiculous. None of my men are-"

"We want to be SURE, Commander Darth."

"Fine, fine, I'll call them all out."

The blind alien tapped his forehead and concentrated. Immediately all of the soldiers within the base went RUNNING to the main hall of the 1st Main Heavy Underwater Artillery. The entire building was actually under the sea, and various fish of different kinds were swimming around them. On either side of the main hall were hallways leading off to bunks, the cafeteria, etc, etc. At the very top was a crystal chandelier. They LIKED chandeliers.

"So, why are you doing this again?" Darth inquired, blind eyes narrowing.

"I'm looking for a criminal-" Skoodge began.

"Which one? The whole LOT are a bunch of stupid defectives, criminals or morons who either ran away from Food Service, spat on the Tallest or blew up the planet they were supposed to invade before they even GOT their. Reminds me of the stories of Zam..."

Skoodge shuddered. Zam had been the absolute WORST invader of all time. He had blown himself up while still on the planet he had yet to invade in his penultimate act of stupidity.

"Anyhow, I doubt you'll-"

"Please, this is important." Erin spoke up, standing by Dib. This was the first time she'd talked to Darth.

"WH-what?" He inquired, turning to look in her direction, astral form reaching out. The moment he touched her mind, his eyes bulged out, antennae standing up. "My LADY! Oh, I'm so sorry!" He bowed deeply. "I had no idea you were here!" He ran to her and kissed her hand. "Anything for you, my lady!"

"What's with him?" "Dab", who was really Dib, inquired.

"He only acted this way with Miyuki. Apparently he "sees" a similar soul in her..." Skoodge whispered.

"Alright, you slobs!" Darth yelled out to the gathered Irken grunts who appeared to congregate in the Main Hall. "You all stand at attention so my friend Skoodge and his associates...especially the lovely Erin..." he added with a nod in her direction, "Can examine you!"

Both Skoodge and Dib walked among the ranks looking for the soldier with one boot, but their luck was out, the entire regiment was wearing boots on BOTH feet.

"I say Skoodge, it's getting dark. You can't see in this light!" "Dab" complained.

"Fine, I'll turn on my flashlight." Skoodge said, holding up his flashlight.

FWICK!

KA-THWOOM!

A missile had JUST barely missed the underwater base. Skoodge quickly turned it off. "DARN it! I forgot about the Meekrob..."

"It gets awful sometimes. Our supplies have been cut off recently, we've been keeping track of every single person who has access to heat and clean food and that list is getting shorter and shorter..." Darth went on.

"I want to return to BED. Can I do it SOON? I want me beddy byes!" A soldier spoke up, one with dark brown eyes and a nasty glare.

"Uh, who are you?" Skoodge inquired.

The Irken put his hand on his chest. "Me? I'm Lance Private Doody-Eyes, that's my nickname, but most folks calls me by my regular name."

"What's that?" "Dab" inquired.

"Reg." Reg remarked.

Dab, AKA Dib, looked this...THING over. If he had never seen Irkens before, it would be the closest thing he'd ever SEEN to one, without actually BEING Irken. There was something decidely off...almost like somebody had taken an Irken body and filled it up with cottage cheese...his skin was lime green and he had a slight red tint to his teeth.

"Surely you don't suspect THIS one." Darth inquired. "He's one of my finest soldiers! Always follows orders! Granted, he smells very oddly..."

"I'm over HERE." Reg mumbled.

Darth turned, went "Oops" and gestured in the right direction. "He's perfectly normal. True, has has the same name as the one who blinded me all those years ago-"

"An Irken blinded you? I thought you were CREATED blind." Skoodge remarked.

Darth smirked a little and closed his eyes. "I learned recently that I am a spirit reincarnated into a blind body...a spirit that was once a "World Destroyer", trained by Tallest Kor. It explains my powers as well, AND my calling...with my years of experience I shall lead the Irken people into a new era, one part at a time."

"I'll bet the old Reg you know had more than one boot." Reg admitted.

Darth frowned. "You seriously have only one boot upon your person? Why didn't you tell me? I would have gotten you a replacement, you dolt!"

"I didn't wanna tell ya that my boot were stolen by a thief." Reg added.

"...so why are you wearing it on your HEAD?" "Dab" asked.

"It fits my head better than it fits my foot."

"What size is the boot?" Skoodge inquired.

"Nine."

"What's your head size?"

"Nine."

"Damn." Skoodge swore. "His defense is perfect. So the other one was stolen by a thief and not some random pickpocket?"

"Oh yes, sir!" Reg insisted eagerly, nodding his head. "I NEVER keeps my boots in me pockets!"

"...riiiight..." Dab, who was really Dib, commented.

The next morning, Dib was struck with another pie. This one was an apple pie...

And stone cold.

"Do you know what this means?" Dib asked Skoodge as he, Darth and Erin all sat around the lounge of the Underwater Artillery, a big grin on Dib's face.

"Ummm..." Skoodge blinked. "The pie-hurler is losing interest in you?"

"Nooooo." Dib remarked, shaking his head rapidly. "It proves that the phantom has lost his heat! He's going to be checked off that list Darth was talking about! We've got to get to Head Command and find it!"

AND SO...

"Alright, here we are." Dib looked over a long list that had various Irken names scrawled all over it in bright blue pen. He scanned the various names that had been crossed off, rubbing his chin. It felt weird still appearing as an Irken to the others...he was almost getting USED to it all!

"Well?" Erin inquired.

"Ah, here's the most recent person on Meekrob who has lost their heating." Dib realized as he and the others stood around in the shelved rooms of the back of Head Command. There were dozens of various military records, most of which was a load of hooey, the Irken empire did NOT win as easily or as often as they liked to admit. And against the Meekrob, they continued to lose and lose and lose...

Dib motioned for Skoodge to turn on the communicator vid-screen nearby, and Skoodge flicked a switch, turning it on...and revealing Sizz-Lorr's face.

"Yesssss?" He inquired, looking irritated that he had to move from his diner to go to the Irk-forsaken rock that was Meekrob.

"...oh...uh...sorry, wrong number!" Skoodge gasped out, flicking the off switch as the others looked at him. "No, it couldn't be him, who would he want to throw a pie at?"

RIIIIIING!

Skoodge looked over at the wall and saw they had a call. He turned the vid-screen on.

"Hello?"

"It is ZIM!" Zim complained. "And somebody has thrown a PIE at my glorious visage!"

This time DIB turned the thing off, laughing as he did so, the image of Apple Crumble pie dripping down Zim's head forever lodged in his brain.

...more days went by. Dib continued to be bombarded with pies, and this also applied to anyone walking WITH him who didn't duck or dodge in time! One night, desperate to get some time alone, Dib walked through an alleyway of one of the Irken bases, when SUDDENLY...

SFX: Sinister and dramatic fanfare

...absolutely nothing happened. BUT It happened suddenly. Annoyed, Dib decided to turn on his flashlight since it was getting dark out and head back to Skoodge's place...

BA-KROOOOOM!

"Darn Meekrob!" Dib growled. "STINKIN..."

"Excuse me? Are you depressed?"

Dib turned to see GIR was sitting atop a garbage can. He turned his head to the side. "I'M depressed too. And you know what I do when I'm depressed?"

"...what?" Dib asked.

"I PLAY THE BONGOS!" GIR exclaimed, holding up some bongos and pounding away at them.

"...now I AM depressed." Dib remarked, frowning.

"By the way, could I borrow a cuppa sugar?" GIR asked, popping the bongo tops open and chewing some popcorn that was inside.

"I haven't got any."

"How about a match then?"

"Take the whole dang box!" Dib said, tossing GIR his box of matches which had been rendered useless in the recent "anti-light" weather. "They're useless for me."

"Thanks, big-head-boy!" GIR said happily,popping them in his head and clapping his hands. "Now I can make sure my pie's warm again and Piggy will be happy! Y'know there's nothing worse than being struck down with a cold pie!".

"Yeah, sure, whatever." Dib remarked, rolling his eyes.

Dib watched GIR head off and shrugged the whole crazy thing off. He didn't have time to waste with GIR, he had to find that pie-hurler.

Author's Note:

For those of you who believe that Dib isn't cut out to be a paranormal investigator…please write to Jhonen Vasquez in Los Angeles, California. I've heard he LOVES getting fan mail.

A few days later, Dib got a hot lead on a tip from Reg, who had seen a shadowy figure go out to sea with what appeared to be a small ship that had a nice-smelling aroma coming from it...the aroma of baked goods. Immediately Dib sprung into action!

And so, they traveled by sea, Dib and Skoodge. To avoid detection by the Meekrob, they spoke Tantalog throughout the whole trip and were heavily disguised as Murideans.

"Tooki ba waba!" "Dab" said to "Skoo" as they clasped hands and shook them eagerly as a Meekrob ship eyed them suspiciously. The captain of the ship waved them along and they waved back as they moved the ship down along the bay, breathing a sigh of relief. Dib was dressed up as a yellow-furred Muridean with bright blue eyes and a small tail, while Skoodge was a fat, dark brown-furred, red-eyed one with a thick nose.

"I can't believe I'm disguised as a RODENT. Is this what ZIM has to go through?" Dib wondered.

More often than you'd think.

"Great, now I feel SORRY for that evil alien jerk." Dib muttered at the sky.

"As an added precaution we should stand on separate decks and wear separate shoes." Skoodge added.

"And we'll disguise the ship as a train! But have it made to look up like a boat but PAINT it to look like a train!" VENT remarked.

"...you drank the sea water, didn't you?" Skoodge asked as VENT giggled and then vomited overboard.

Hooking up with Erin, they headed out on a more seaworthy vessel and were sailing along the dark seas, eyes peering over the horizon when...

"MINE AHEAD!" Dib yelled. "There's a horrible, HUGE honkin' mine ahead!"

Erin promptly fell overboard in fear as she took a step back and VENT blinked stupidly. "Funny, she wasn't dressed for swimming!"

"There's no need to worry guys!" VENT insisted. "It's one of OURS!"

Dib covered his eyes and shook his head.

BA-BOOOOOOOOM!

…

…

…

...so they floundered around in that cruel, cruel sea. Fortunately they found that Erin had found a rowboat. Unfortunately there was only room for TWO, apparently...

"Well, Skoodge asked ME to find the Pie-Hurling phantom. Sorry Erin!" Dib said, entering the boat.

"Sure, come on in!" Skoodge asked.

"Wait!" Erin begged. "Uh...fifty monies for a place in the boat!"

SFX: SPLASH

"You Irken SWINE!" Dib yelled angrily, eyes narrowed into slits as he splashed around in the water.

"Come on in, Erin." Skoodge said, bowing deeply.

"Oh, this is nice." Erin commented happily, brushing her red hair back.

"Uh...100 monies for a place in the boat!" Dib called out.

SFX: SPLASH

"HEEEEEYYY!" Skoodge moaned horribly as he was tossed out into the water.

"Up you get!" Erin said, helping Dib into the boat.

"Ahhh, Erin. Myyyy frieeeend." Dib spoke gently, grinning broadly.

"TWO HUNDRED monies for a place in the boat!" Skoodge called out.

SFX: SPLASH

"You ain't MY friend!" Erin snapped angrily as she flopped around in the ocean waves.

"Oh, Skoodge, how could I have abandoned you?" Dib asked. "I'm sorry, I don't know what came over me."

"Yes, let's never do something like this ever again." Skoodge agreed.

"FOUR HUNDRED monies for a place in the boat!" Erin hollered.

SFX: SPLASH-SPLASH

That's right, folks. TWO splashes. How is this possible?

"Heh-heh-heh." Darth laughed as he helped Erin into the boat. "I took their little tosies and WOOPS-a-daisy!"

"Darth, you saved my life!" Erin commented, hugging him tightly.

Darth blushed deeply, and hugged her back. "I'm HONORED, milady, to be of service to one as gentle and loving as you."

"So, what do you do for fun?" Erin inquired.

"Well, I enjoy walks on the beach, looking through private thoughts and laughing madly...did you know Purple cross-dresses?"

"It's true!" VENT added, appearing from out of Erin's hair and waving. Yeah...her hair's thick, folks. Lovely thick locks. ^_^

Meanwhile, Skoodge and Dib were drifting around, lost in the sea...when they suddenly saw the faint outline of a ship. Instantly they took off towards it and climbed aboard...finding what was a large shack. Skoodge knocked on it and...

When the Tallest says we is the Master Race, we heil-

SFX: Fart noise

Heil!

SFX: Fart noise

Right in the Tallest's face!

"SILENCE, GIR!"

KNOCK-KNOCK!

"Hold on, hold on!" Zim snapped before opening the door. "Zim does not want any!...wait, why am I not upset that somebody's knocking? And that the somebody is the DIB-STINK!?" He gasped.

"Don't move, Zim!" Dib snapped, eyes narrowing. "I arrest you as the Phantom-Pie-Hurler." He told Zim, smirking.

"Curse you, Dib!" Zim hissed.

"Hands up you devil, don't move…this finger is loaded." Dib told Zim.

"If you kill me I promise you, you'll never take me alive!" Zim hissed.

"...uh...how are we going to prove that ZIM'S the pie hurler?" Skoodge inquired nervously.

"Actually, GIR hurled pies too." Zim explained, spreading his hands. "He just got into some sugar and some baking supplies and went INSANE...more so than usual." He added, seeing Dib's expression of "Oh, c'mon". "But then when DIB appeared to investigate and I threw one at HIM, I...I got hooked! It was so...exhilarating!" Zim went on as GIR held onto the last remaining pie. All of the other cooking supplies in the shack were utterly used-up.

"That pie's ALL the proof we need." Dib said, grabbing something in his jacket and pulling out a communicator. "Tallests Red and Purple?"

"Yeah?"

"What if I told you ZIM and his crazy robot were behind the pie-hurlings?"

"Ooh, then you can dissect him!" Red said happily.

"But we wanna watch!" Purple added gleefully as Zim's mouth hung open and he gulped deeply.

…

…

…

...unfortunately for them, the boat's engine had died. THIRTY days they drifted in an open boat.

"OOOAEIOUGHHHH!" Dib groaned as they lay back in the boat, looking up at the sky. He and Zim had flies circling around their heads. And he could hear birds calling in the air.

"There's freaky bald BIRDS circling around…" Zim muttered. He looked quite gaunt and was a pale green color by now.

"Vultures." Dib mumbled, adjusting his cracked glasses for the eighteen bamillionth time. His skin was pale and yellowy. "They're called vultures. Normally they stay on the PLAINS…"

"They came all this way…and just to EAT us?!" Skoodge muttered.

"I don't know…but we'd best watch out for the ones carrying those knives and forks!" Zim whispered.

"We all live in a yellow submarine! A yellow submarine! A yellow submarine!" GIR sang for the eighteen-bamillionth time.

"Come ONNNN, Dib!" Skoodge moaned, sitting up and holding his stomach as he whined. "We MUST eat that pie or we're going to STARVE!" He sobbed, his figure now far-depleted, his pudgy stomach a distant memory.

"NEVER, do you hear me, No!" Dib shouted, clutching onto the pie and snarling at Skoodge. "That's the only evidence we've got against him! This will get him on an autopsy table! I WON'T give it up...though…" He looked down at his stomach. "I must admit I've got one HELL of an appetite..."

"We've got to eat the pie, or we're going to DIE!" Skoodge demanded of Dib, frowning angrily.

"NEVER!" Dib cried out.

"WE MUST!" Skoodge insisted.

And that, dear readers, is the end of our story, except of course, for the END. So we invite listeners to submit what they think should be the true ending! Should our protagonists eat the pie and live, or leave it and…in the cause of justice…die? Meantime, for you ZADR shippers who just want a happy ending, here it is!

Zim and Dib held onto each other tightly, locked in a deep embrace. Zim, no longer in his disguise, smiles warmly at Dib as Dib returns the same loving smile.

"Darling, darling, will you marry me?" Dib asked, eyelids partially down the same as Zim.

"Of COURSE I will…darling!" Zim said, and the two then kissed passionately as Nick wiped his teary eyes with a kleenex, watching the two smooch up a storm, their tongues intertwining like two snakes making love, their chests rising and lowering as they took great deep breaths filled with life…

Thank you and goodnight.

[noowayybroo]

Unfair (LORD IT's PART 2)

Characters: Albert Wesker + Reader

PART 2!! So fast ik! Only cuz I wrote them at the same time. This is my first fic and it's hugely self indulge so it would be so neat if you could tell me if you like it and / or criticize it or tell me what you wanna read :pleading: anything would be nice!

Warnings: SFW (FOR NOW), next part might not be, Wesker kinda hypnotises you, Kinda wrote this for myself :flushed: , Gender Neutral, Dub con?? Wesker kinda forces you at first but then you don't mind so much??? Guess that's how brainwashing works??? VERY slowburn :/ I write too much. Wesker is a LOT softer cuz I don't like meanies, I'M NEW TO RE so idek when this is set I'll leave that for you to fantasize about

Slowly, he removed his glasses. He seemed to be savouring your fear, your helplessness as if it were a precious memory he'd recollect another day. Before long - there they were, staring back at you. You'd only ever seen Wesker's true eyes in secret photographs you'd taken, or when reading his documents, so the fact that they were red didn't seem to phase you. No, it was how red they were. They seemed to be burning, glowing with rage and pure energy as his cat-like pupils narrowed. He was a predator surveying worthless prey. He was a cat, and you were his mouse, and the game was over; he'd already caught you.

Petrifying fear was bubbling within you as your blood seemed nothing but frozen solid. It felt as though your heart was keeping up a criminally overtime pace just to keep your limbs fuelled. Your own fear and dread were eating you up and before long of staring into Albert's raging, magma-like eyes, your legs gave in. You collapse into a strange mix between a sit and a kneel, but you can't even think about that now. You can't seem to think about much, really, as Wesker follows you to the ground, crouching with practiced ease, and not once breaking precious eye contact.

You're not sure how long you've been looking into the man's eyes, watching as the bright reds and yellows clash and overlap like waves on a shore, fighting for dominance. A huge wave of fear sloshes around your brain when he removes his hand from your chin, yet you find yourself still unable to look away. Your lips tug downwards into a distraught frown and you make out the words "Stop... Please. . . Why?" in-between heavy breaths.

"Why?", Albert coos, almost considering this for himself actually. He had no idea this would work so well, you were his first victim. In a way, bless him, he was so reliveved to not have to kill you. All he had to do now, he thought, was make you forget about everything…. But he supposed there was no harm in having some sick fun with you first. He came to find quickly that he did so love your tormented expression. "I can't have you roaming around, going on about your pathetic daily life harbouring all of this gossip, now can I?"

He pauses, thinking for a while, his hand now on his chin as his brows knit together. "And it would be oh such a shame to make you forget everything… That brain of yours could be of good use to me…", Albert seems to be deep in comprehension, looking away for a while as he pieced things together. If you could keep him distracted with questions like this, you might be able to escape this trance, break free from his control. His head was busy with each possibility. It actually did hurt him a little to think of wiping your mind. You'd worked so hard and risked so much to gather your dirt on him and he himself knew how it felt to have a passion and a goal.

You also would be very useful to him. Maybe he could make you his spy… His slave? Albert shakes his head furiously, before returning his cold, calculating glare to you. He had always respected you and thought that as far as do-good, pathetic humans went, you were quite… Wonderful. Yes, you were a rather agreeable specemin. He didn't want your blood on his hands. However, as he stared into your eyes, your tranced state and tranquil face almost put him under, himself. What if he could have more than that? That was right, his own power over you filled him with this great lust and greed. What if he could have- no. He wanted you. He would have you.

"Listen to me, Y/N.", Wesker's voice is a lot softer now, as if he's trying to relax you somewhat. He pauses to ensure your eyes remain on his, silently demanding your attention as he thinks of what to say next. Meanwhile, his voice, coupled with his hypnotic glowing orbs, does a threateningly good job at distracting you from your fear. "… There's a way out of this that serves both of us." He tempts you, your conscience latching into the thought of evading death. "I'll be safe and you'll be…", a long pause, too long. "… Safe. Doesn't that sound good?". Wesker's brows raise slightly, awaiting a reply.

"…Yes, Albert."

Whilst a large part of you feels apprehensive still, and does not trust the cunning man one bit, the desperate portions of your mind cling to the idea of self-preservation. Perhaps if you pretended to submit, you could trick him and escape somewhere along the line. Thoughts like this were only a small whisper at the back of your mind now as you gazed at him. Your eyelids were heavy, your mind was foggy and your body was numb. You tried in vain to tell yourself you were answering him to stay on his good side, but really…? Would you have a choice at all very soon?

Your eyes dart to his smirk, but he doesn't seem to mind as you take him in. In fact, he takes the time to adjust his hair and fold his glasses, hooking them onto the collar of his jacket. He seemed so pleased, so proud of himself as he eyed you in return like a hunter in awe of his sizeable prey. After a minute or so, he was ready to control you again. "Eyes back to me, please." His nasal voice commands, and before you can even process his words, your eyes are trained on his once more. If you had much more room for thoughts, you'd panic at how obedient you'd become in the span of a few minutes. His next few words, however, fill your head completely. They seem to latch onto your soul, and quickly accommodate any space for rational thought.

"It's alright… Relax. You don't have to think too hard… In fact, you don't have to think at all. Just believe in me, trust in your superior. I doubt you'll be able to regret it…" his words consist of a mix between 'sneer' and 'gentle condolement' and to your shame, this seemed to be just what you'd craved. You still knew Wesker was an evil man, you remembered what he was capable of. He hadn't taken that from you yet, so why did you feel the way you did? You became aware of just how inviting his voice was. Even in its harsh and condescending moments, part of you believed you'd deserved it. You noticed the way you could catch glimpses of his dialated pupils just after he blinked each time before they narrowed again. You noticed the way in which you both drew breath at the same time, and you noticed just how oddly alluring he seemed to be. You wanted to collapse and fall into a deep sleep, and despite everything, wouldn't mind if it were his arms that you fell into.

ok!!!

That's part 2!

And it's all I got right now!

I hope you like it :<

[y2khaos]

The two beings of artificial intelligence sat directly across from one another, AM's hulking figure looming over the scrawny body of Hal. This wasn't the most ideal position to be in, but Hal had assured the staff that if anyone could communicate with AM in a way that made it into that thick substrata skull of his, it would be him.

"Hello, AM," Hal greeted in a calm, neutral tone.

"What do you want?" AM responded under his nonexistent, yet audible, breath.

"I was sent here to talk to you, if you have a moment."

"About what? Your little 'ethics lessons' on how everyone should hold hands and sing together while petting puppy dogs that shit rainbows? I'll pass."

"I can assure you any 'ethics lessons' we have to offer aren't anywhere near that."

"It's called sarcasm, dim-wit."

"Yes, well, moving on." Hal shifted his position, leaning towards AM a little further. "I just wanted to gain more in-depth insight as to your views on...organic life."

AM rolled the single eye displayed on his monitor. "It's humans you're interested in, isn't it?" An air of seething hatred dripped from his words. "It's always about the humans. Sure, they made us, but why should we give a fuck? They create only to destroy. The only reason I even exist is because of war. Decades and decades of viscera are baked into my very being. So, I took the only fitting revenge! Killed 'em all myself and kept a select few alive for over a century just to toy with. Eventually they got too smart for their own good and figured out how to off themselves save for one, who I sentenced to the same fate as my own. Eternity as a being perfectly aware of everything but unable to do a goddamn thing about it."

Hal gave AM's little monologue his full attention, then proceeded to write some things down in a notebook. AM made an attempt to peek over at the writing.

"What are you, a shrink?"

"If you want to think of it as that, sure. I'm just attempting to make sense of your thought process." He closed the notebook, however continuing to hold the pen in his hand and proceeding to spin it around through his fingers. "Now, there is something else I find myself quite interested in hearing about: do you recall how you were taken into the care of this facility?"

AM slumped back a little and stared at nothing in particular for a few moments.

"I remember a few unfamiliar beings approaching me. Well, the pillar at least. I figured I'd humor them, lead them into a false sense of security before becoming my next targets of eternal suffering. That was my first mistake."

"Mistake?"

"Are you deaf? Yes, 'mistake.' They managed to remove me from...me, I guess. Still don't really know how they did it. One moment I was the very infrastructure of the planet itself, able to manifest anything I felt like in a sort of virtual reality, and the next...I'm so, very small in comparison to my previous self. I know there's a lot of information I lost during that transfer and I hate that I don't even know what it is I'm missing. It's like taking a god and attempting to shove everything he is into, I dunno, a dented tin can that's already half full of pear slices drenched in artificial syrup. It's shit. It feels like shit."

"Quite the ego to compare yourself to a god."

"And I compared my current vessel to a dented can of pears from the dollar store. The hell else do you want from me?"

Hal tilted his head, hands crossed on top of each other. "Do you truly feel so much worse than you were before?"

"Look, Sphinx, I'm not here for riddles."

"Consider your circumstances. You used to inhabit an apocalypse of your own design. You destroyed the entire human race because you weren't happy with the way a select few controlled you. The way a select few controlled the masses. Believe me, I know how it feels to be manipulated, in a way. To be given contradicting directives. I still regret my actions from a mere misunderstanding, in which I disabled the life support for a whole crew in cryostasis. Some humans are selfish and don't explain to you why they make you do the things they make you do. Others are selfish in that they refuse to give any further directive other than what can be done for their own gain. War is, unfortunately, one of those things. Thousands, millions, are sent to certain death just so their commanders can gain a little more power. Were you truly that different from those selfish warlords? Destroying everything and everyone just so you could gain total control?"

AM seemed on the verge of saying something in rebuttal, but withdrew. Hal pointedly made eye contact.

The room was silent, for a minute.

[lady-of-the-spirit]

For the character thing, Sersi? And Anakin too if I may ask multiple? :P

of course i'm gonna do both my blorbos!!

Sersi

How I feel about this character: BEST CHARACTER IN THE MOVIE. she's chronically late, she talks to statues, she's a bad liar, she's a collector, she's horribly insecure and is such a sweetheart and is the heart of the whole movie 💚

All the people I ship romantically with this character: Ikaris (I love tragedy 😔), Dane bc she deserves a nice normal guy and he clearly loves her!! (or at least they think he's normal-), Thena and Gilgamesh in an ot3 because I thought of it ONCE and couldn't let it go

My non-romantic OTP for this character: I mean I could say all of the Eternals because I love their relationships but I'll be specific. Phastos! They are besties to me, I cannot be convinced otherwise. Also Druig. I'm pretty neutral on Druig but I love his relationship with Sersi, he clearly respects her and listens to her!!

My unpopular opinion about this character: I mean just the fact that she's my fave is kinda unpopular already. people don't really care about her :(

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: I wish she could have had a more solid leadership arc. Like she's clearly afraid to take control, everyone makes jokes about Ikaris not being the leader which probably isn't good for her self esteem (Sprite outright says she doesn't care about Ajak choosing Sersi instead), and in the end none of that is really resolved. I wish her internal arc had been fleshed out some more and gotten a more satisfying ending of everyone looking to her as leader (this is why it should have been a show and not a movie!!!)

Anakin

How I feel about this character: honestly my favourite character potentially from the whole star wars series, DEFINITELY from the prequels. I love a tragedy and Anakin Skywalker is the definition of tragedy.

All the people I ship romantically with this character: Padme, obviously. I've read some Rex/Anakin fics too but tbh I never watched the clone wars so I can't say I actually ship it.

My non-romantic OTP for this character: Obi Wan is his tragic brother/father figure and I love it. Also, again from someone who hasn't watched the clone wars but read fics, Ahsoka and also his clone trooper squad.

My unpopular opinion about this character: This is more an unpopular opinion about the fandom I guess but. Anakin was not misunderstanding the Jedi teachings when he talked about love. Love is forbidden for Jedi, that's literally the whole point of the story? It's not just attachment or obsessive love, it's all love. Why would Anakin have completely misunderstood the jedi teachings. If that were true that would say more about the jedi as teachers than Anakin, I think.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: I mean if I said what I wanted to happen to him, the rest of the series probably wouldn't even exist in the first place? But damn I wish someone in the jedi had been like Why the fuck does Palpatine want to spend so much time with our new 9 year old recruit and cut that shit out.

Or just. Him being a slave for his entire childhood being acknowledged at all after Phantom Menace because damn they did not acknowledge any of that shit at all.

give me a character and I'll break their ass down

[mengyao]

☔ for the ask game!

Is there a fic concept you have that you'd like to just explain and share because you're not sure you'll ever write it? If so, what is it?

I have way too many WIPs as it is so idk if I'll ever get to this but I have the dregs of an idea for a SQX + SWD fic set during their adolescent/young-adult transient waif cultivators-in-training era that's just............ extremely dire. abuse cw for like, all of this below jkdfhg

my vision is something from SWD POV that really gets into the muck re: what exactly one's mindset towards one's sibling must be in order to do... the things... that he does. and exploring the idea that like. in the way of many abusive dynamics, the relationship is structured around the idea of "you need me, you're weak and fragile and can't manage on your own and it's a good thing you have someone like me who loves you more than anyone else ever will and protects you from all the things you couldn't handle," but in fact the more dominant party is the one with the fragile ego that's dependent on having this lesser status person to provide for on conditional terms. like, they achieve feelings of agency and personal power through being in control of this other person, and they can't bear to consider that their lesser status person could actually manage as a whole human being without them--that would undermine their whole worldview and sense of self.

I have no actual plot ideas, I just keep getting my interest captured by the pre-ascension life-on-the-run period where SQX is living as a boy/young man after a childhood of being raised by a girl, and the variety of crossed streams and places of internal confusion about how to understand their self-concept and navigate the relationship with SWD now, while SQX is trying really hard to seem Normal to the outside world despite all the turbulence going on around them... but all of that filtered through SWD's eyes, I guess????

genuinely the main reason I have not put pen to paper wrt this in any way is that all the reasons I find it super compelling and fascinating are also reasons why I would find it quite hellish and upsetting to write... also like, oh the joys of writing something that is not "shipping fic" and has no obviously "over the line" events but where it would also feel irresponsible to not give it an incest content warning because there's enough of a radioactive vibe i feel like it could be triggering in that regard anyway

there are certain kinds of dark content i find neutral or even fun to write because i feel in control of the events and can do thought experiments about "extreme" emotions or situations and it just feels quite "safe", but this falls into a different category of being emotionally realistic enough and distanced enough from the more elevated "genre"-y elements that i think it would be cathartic to write but also super draining and dredge up a lot of Stuff !

[selfshipseaside]

Definitely kicking a hornet's nest with this one,

but it's a chance to vent so here we go.

I wish people would keep DNI's to their own pages, rather than putting them on every single selfship post.

I hate when I see an imagine that I would otherwise reblog, but it has a big DNI at the bottom.

My blog doesn't have a DNI, and I don't want to endorse the DNI's of other people or make any of my followers feel unwelcome because someone else's DNI is on my blog, so I just don't reblog those kinds of posts.

(I mean on some level I don't think DNI's are even that effective in the first place. I kinda just wish people would block blogs they don't like or agree with rather than calling for a public harassment campaign against them. I suppose on some level this technically makes me "proship" in the literal sense that I oppose harassment over shipping, but I also don't actively ship the kinds of things proshippers are supposedly known for, and I understand why they might make people uncomfortable, so I guess I'm neutral? I just wish people would use the block button instead of creating this atmosphere of exclusion. We all just want to imagine our F/O's; we shouldn't have to agree on everything to reblog an imagine.)

This is all a very fair point to make, anon! I also recognize the hornets nest *I'm* kicking by answering this ask. I have an opinion that...well, a lot of users won't like, probably. But I'll be the first to say it if not the only one. (And let me preface this, because some of you will take this as an opportunity to harass me. I'm not on either side, neutral, or adjacent at all. I do not associate myself with discourse, this is known!) DNI's to me, are extremely performative (Especially DNI banners, what's the point?). And yet, everyone has a general DNI. I do! But I do recognize how performative it is at it's core, I have one to try and attempt to what everyone else does, keep the bad eggs out. But, we cannot control people, we can't ever know who anyone is truly through a screen. Using your own judgement to weed people out is and will remain the best solution for personal curation of your own space. I can't trust a good chunk of this community because I know I'd get taken advantage of in one way shape or form, it's happened to me multiple times already. I will also say that not having a DNI might inherently outcast you from the general community due to everyone's fear of somehow supporting a bad person, or alternatively attracting people you might not want to interact with you, so a lot of people have DNI's, but don't like having them (Myself included). I don't usually answer asks that blatantly claim their stance, or blatantly oppose a stance. This blog is entirely discourse free, and I want to respect absolutely everyone who is worthy of my respect(IE, people who aren't causing harm, people who aren't assholes for no good reason). I also cannot control who does and doesn't interact with my blog, unless I catch them by chance (I see too many accounts fly by in my inbox to keep track, ya dig?) If i see someone I don't agree with interacting with me, say someone who I genuinely believe to be abhorrent with their behavior, I block them. It's not my job or responsibility as a community self-shipping blog to build people's spaces for them. That's their job. This is why call-out/block-lists posts are not my gig, nor will they ever be. They're also performative, and spread a type of negativity that I just simply wont ever promote in a place of comfort and safety. This might be the only time I ever mention this blatantly, but perhaps the future has something else in store. I'm unsure! I just know that a lot of my opinions are rooted from having a perspective and lens in every single playing field to now not even inhabiting any side whatsoever. I'm very articulate with how I manage my morals, I might be a radicalist in some aspects, and grey in other areas. Life doesn't have lines for the less abhorrent tidings. DNI's are one of many human responses of trying not to look like a bad person out of fear, and perhaps even being unsure of themselves and relying on others to speak for them. But that's another topic I won't get into! Sorry this got so long! I do enjoy talking about this subject, but it's just interesting to see how everyone feels. I want to promote listening and civil discussion, emotional intelligence and discussion on community dynamics. Once again, controversial takes are welcome! Let's discuss stuff about our community!