#good and dykey. but also be serious

[fappellmoan]

every time theres a ruby edit the search is ruby cruz boyfriend. leave her alone!

[lesb0]

A Treatise on Pop Celesbians/bis 🌈✨

(by someone who only listens to music from the 15th-16th century)

I'm super happy that tiktok is making it possible for small artists to breakthrough and blow up BUT when it comes down to chappell, sabrina simply slays more and is the better artist. She genuinely loves being a pop princess, has so much fun on stage, and started serious singing lessons back at Disney ages ago. her work is more cohesive and better produced, her stylist is doing really well with establishing her silhouettes, her vocals are stronger, and she also naturally has the adorable Disney girl look that the industry eats up which propelled her career so fast

chappell is purposely drag "ugly" which is very fun and will def get her some Halloween costumes this year, her fun little songs are so catchy and cute, but the production and style and her skill level needs a lot more work. Beyonce wasn't good at first either, remember when she was just solanges off key pretty little sister? I love that she's a successful rags to superstar story and she is really bringing the community together rn, it feels good. but, she doesn't know how to be famous. It's making her extremely depressed and miserable. She sings improperly for a soprano and it's going to ruin her vocals. quickly. she HATES having a fandom. she was reeeally lucky the pandemic algorithm picked her up right before the great tiktok boom but that doesn't have longevity. also I know she's freshly out but I can't be obsessed with a new lesbian who totally disregards lesbian culture. it's just so blah to see another drag queen appended onto male culture. I just want to see Dykey Dykes who are super proud to be one of us, cultural-historically and all, not a sad hag adopted by gay boys.

Billie adores her craft and has the strongest vocal signature out of anyone on the charts by far, she's an incredible artist and is the most mature performer. She is so protective of other famous women in general even though she started out as a baby in so many precarious positions herself. I know shes going to keep making good catchy music about loving pussy. I hope she puts some effort into learning production because obviously her brother doesn't want to do her sex songs LOL

Muna Absolutely EATS at vocals, punchy beats, they have such a strong sound and the butchfemmebutch thing is so, so powerful & sexy & real. They are thee perfect band imo. but the stylist is so inconsistent with branding that I couldn't recognize them as the same band I learned about from my gay friend in 2020. they're constantly serving cunt. but only the good taste lesbians are there to eat it.

Zolita has released some absolute bangers but her vocals haven't kept up with her high production standards and the rebranding from vampire to nun to barbie to cheerleader isn't helping her establish a solid pop artist identity! she should've stayed in the indie zone, dark and whispery and gothic was her thing. But I love that she's never shyed away from aggressive out and proud lesbian aesthetics and marketing, I still have her lesbian sex stickers on my laptop!

peach prc sacrificed getting 1m+ views early on in her career to be an out lesbian. she's a good singer, but she's stuck singing about her ex boyfriend because that's what got her the #1 single. I love her adorable fairy femme4butch aesthetic even if her music isn't good

As for JoJo I don't know WHAT she's doing with the whole troll cringebait thing but it's funny and shes rich enough to take care of generations... It's very responsible that she's keeping the new annoying dyke brand away from her little girl brand at target, she's growing into a good woman which is rare to see.

King princess CAN be a good pop artist but she's too inconsistent. she has a billion dollars and doesn't need her career anyways she's just having a good time.

I still think Hayley kiyoko could've been the queen of dyke pop if she would've dropped acting and modelling but she really is such a triple threat in talent and has the right looks that there's no way she shouldn't come out really successful but she is a woc so there's a whole different standard and many darker elements at play when considering the racism to killing her career.

I don't know why st Vincent moved into doing pop for 5 seconds. but Los ageless is my jam. Annie has been disappointing for a long time!

[hazzzyrider]

for the ask game: 5, 13, 18, 24, 39, and 50 ^w^) 💖

(From https://www.tumblr.com/hazzzyrider/760700649723789312)

5: Have you got any kinks you haven't tried yet but really want to? If so, what are they?

Probably knifeplay. I've tried rough play but serious blood-related stuff takes a lot of time to prepare and learn.

13: Do you have a favourite sexual memory? If so, what is it?

A threesome with two really good friends. I had a crush on the first, we went on a date, they told the second (their partner), we spoke with each other, second had a crush on me and we just all ended up really liking each other and fucking <3

18: What is your favourite nsfw compliment to give?

If I call you biteable, it basically means I want us to destroy each other so thoroughly we become a melted mess in bed <3

24: What is your perviest confession?

I don't think anything can really live up to that. This whole blog has my perviest stuff posted. Probably something CNC-related that I can't post here or it would scare off a lot of people hahaha

39: What sex act do you think you are best at? Describe how you do it.

Eating that thang out

50: Describe your body as positively as you can.

I'm very soft!!!!!!!! My boyfriend also called me dykey the other day and I basically got wet on the spot from that <3

[im-so-tethered]

THIS IS AN 18+ SPACE

Just wanted to start my pinned post off with that. If you are under 18, please do not follow or interact with any of this. You may feel ready or something, but your brain is not ready. Trust me.

Anyways! Hi, I’m Laura and I’m in my early 30s. 🥰 I have finally accepted that I’m some kind of she/they transfem in the past 5 years. I’m a huge slut and I’m desperate to be used! If you’re trans I’m kissing you on the mouth. Things you should know:

I am in a happy relationship, but I’m somewhere in the polyamorous world. Not really looking for serious relationship stuff, but some casual sexting is very encouraged. t4t mostly just b/c…y’all get it, you know? Come be a slut with me n_n

stuff i’m very into and you’ll see a lot: dom/sub stuff (i’m into both, but lean sub usually), pet play (leash me, call me a good girl), other kink stuff like rope play, orgasm denial, punishment (you might see some consequences of consensual violence)

i try to tag consensual non-consensual stuff as #cnc since that’s a little more spicy understandably

I say I’m bi, but gender is complicated. you will see all kinds of bodies here, but also a lot of titties and cock

i’ll use #come and play for interactive stuff like asks and begging for attention. also, if i ever post my own stuff i'll use that

constantly tempted to post more pics, but i’m also trying not to jump into the deep end b/c horny brain go brrrrr

don’t come here for detrans stuff or misgendering kink stuff. do not want it.

i will block empty/ageless/minor blogs. also will block if the vibes are off.

this is a sideblog and i follow from i**l****g**

I use mommy and daddy in a dykey way and sometimes i'll reblog posts that use it that way

[chapst1ckmcdyke]

Signs you need to seriously get tf out of a relationship

No seriously. if you see these behaviors I don't care how petty it seems. get tf out of there. 

Your s/o saying that they're attracted to broken people. ex: "they're just more interesting/I feel bad saying it but people with trauma are just x y z"

Trying to convince you to not cut/dye your hair or wear certain clothing/makeup. Or outright not letting you at all. ex: "I don't think you'd look good with x y z hair you'd look dykey/boyish/maybe if you were thinner etc"

You’re uneasy to bring your s/o around your friends. this might not be obvious, but if you sit down and think hard its probably because they might say something wildly inappropriate or offensive or just boundaryless. Personal ex: not wanting to invite them out because they made a joke about not being able to see to a blind man, making jokes involving slurs to lgbt people, making jokes that might be fine among well-known friends but not to first-time strangers. Maybe you don't know why you're uneasy even if you do think, but the feeling is akin to anxiety, like you're walking on eggshells, not embarrassment.

None of your friends like them. while no, you should not take your friend's approval without question. But if a large chunk of your friends or family don't like your s/o- in the way that they approach you quietly when they're gone to ask "why tf are they acting like that/saying that stuff" or every time they're around each other a fight erupts, you should really consider why its a common consensus and issue.

Since entering the relationship you've lost passion in your hobbies and you don't know why. This isn't "oh I've had a bout of depression for a few months now I think its that" this is "I used to love writing/drawing/cooking/singing but I haven't been able to for a long time and I can't put my finger on why" especially if you have bursts of wanting to resume these interests when they're gone/ you're away from them.

finding yourself strategizing how you’ll be able to have your emotional needs met. this will be individual to every person. but an example could be that you might feel high strung and need a hug or some cuddles but you know that you have to go through a ritual or performance instead of being able to just go up and hug them. 

Your sexual desires and satisfaction are not considered important. in simple words, did you get to cum? who cares! they certainly don't. they already finished and don't feel like going anymore/they might say they feel bad and put on a big show abt it, but they put all the pressure on you for you to finish or say that you just need to let them do x y or z yet never initiate those behaviors. also, see above if you feel you need to scheme to be able to have them care enough to let you finish. (for clarity, this scenario doesn't apply if they aren't interested in having sex, nobody owes anybody sex but if both parties are enthusiastic but you’re left as chopped liver, this is a problem) also if they give excuses to not want to wear a condom or make it increasingly difficult where its either unsafe sex or no sex and they hold your sexual gratification over your head as incentive/say condoms aren't eco-friendly/ say they’re allergic/ too big/ etc.

swallowing what you want to say. ex: they violate boundaries with a comment or a joke you don't like, but you swallow it in order to keep the peace and feel you have to be the bigger person with an “uh huh” or agreeing with them when you actually don't in an attempt to shut down the conversation and avoid an argument or a long drawn out debate. this happens, all the time.

constant button pushing. This is a form of boundary violation and power dynamic that can vary widely on how it presents itself. it could be not letting you sleep because they won't stop talking, it could be poking you in sensitive spots to watch you jump to the point of annoyance or in inappropriate situations. it could be forcing you into debates or “kitchen sinking” things that don't matter, making thinly veiled jabs that can be denied as jokes etc. Chances are this will not be enough to present itself as aggressive but as just petty enough to make you feel petty for mentioning it. but even when you tell them you don't like it, they’ll continue until a full argument arises or say “oh sorry I forgot” as many times as it takes to reach that argument or there are enough outbursts its not worth it. 

becoming upset when you grow/heal/change. This might seem obvious but the ways this behavior manifests can be subtle like the rest of the list. chances are they’ll be whiney when you do something new. “what? I wanted you to start hiking with me forever ago! but it's funny you want to now.” interchange the word hiking with gaming/DnD/cooking/camping/anything really. any sign of you becoming happy or discovering something new is regarded with childlike self-pity or a claim they wanted to show it to you first and you should feel guilty for liking it now. 

“they have a lot of growing to do, but if I stick around they’ll find themselves and be happy and I can share in that!” yeah no. this is a really sweetly, flowery, worded way of saying “they have a lot of problems/ are immature but it's fine because I can be a foil to fix them and then they’ll be happy and ill be happy!” this is the manic pixie dreamgirl narrative. you’re not a person, you’re a ploy to actualize someone else’s dream and desires while your own are sidelined. this is a serious sign of codependence that society especially encourages in women. 

there are many other red flags for a bad relationship, but these are the ones I wanted to share because they’re often overlooked or seen as normal in the society we live in. but they’re unhealthy as hell and yall, I'm not kidding, RUN FOR THE GOD DAMN HILLS if you check off some of these boxes. 

[livvyofthelake]

i really wish more cool people watched once upon a time so i could talk about it the way we all talk about riverdale.

like, mary margaret gets arrested for murder because regina framed her by putting a heart in mary margaret’s jewelry box and burying it by the toll bridge, by the way the murder she was accused of was the wife of her boyfriend. regina faces no real consequences for this!

by the way, regina (who is the evil queen and can rip peoples hearts out and control them with it) still has random peoples hearts in her vault even LONG after she’s been redeemed. like, season 6, she’s fully considered redeemed, she still has a few random peoples hearts

like we call characters like nancy wheeler and veronica lodge girlbosses but you literally do not know what a real girlboss is until you’ve seen the insane women on this show, don’t even get me started on zelena’s entire pregnancy plot line, that’s a whole other post for another time!

hook murdered his father when he literally did not even have to, like he really just felt like it. he also murdered david’s father when david was like six years old (david is his best friend and also his father in law)

when emma was 14 she ran away from her foster family, robbed one convenience store with a girl she just met in a very dykey way, and then had the most dramatic breakup of all time with this girl. they meet later when they’re both 30 and emma almost kills her.

i haven’t even touched on all the fairy tale drama and plot twists! peter pan is a villain! the queen of hearts is the evil queen’s mother! little red riding hood is a werewolf! i know everyone has been making reboots and shit for a few years now trying to make fairy tales cool, but once upon a time started airing in 2011, and you guys have no idea how fucking revolutionary this shit was in its time!! and it’s so good because once they realized they couldn’t really be a serious drama anymore (like after season 2) they just went all in on being a camp masterpiece! some of you misuse the word camp because you don’t get that camp is intentional, but once upon a time’s camp is completely intentional... david jousts in the back of his ford truck using a two by four... they knew exactly what they were doing!

god does anyone want to talk about once upon a time let’s talk about once upon a time please let’s just talk about once upon a time

[momestuck]

Let’s read Hiveswap Friendsim - volume 6

We just met a cool assassin and the sleaziest Ally(TM) ever. What horrors awaits us next?

Unusually, this time we have a pair of trolls for one of them. But first, we’ve got Elwurd - cerulean blood, equal to Vriska. Kuprum and Fokyl meanwhile have yellow blood, equal to Sollux.

Elwurd

Elwurd is created by Magdalena Clarke, who previously wrote flyboy Vikare.

As soon as our protagonist meets Elwurd, they freak out - understandably because the last few bluebloods we’ve met have been various levels of sadistic monster, starting right back with Ardata in the first episode.

Elwurd’s soundtrack is pretty cool, distorted guitars and a piano. I wish I knew how to describe music! Her (gendered by the narrator) quirk seems to be capitalising the letter L, and nothing else.

But the narrator’s into her look as well, which is good because otherwise the narrator would be entirely unrelatable. We get a moment of introspection...

The narrator chooses to hang with her without an option. The now-standard episode structure is lampshaded...

But we get to choose the closer place or the farther place. This is pretty much random. Let’s go far.

Before long, Elwurd gets a text.

Apparently her ex is like, haunting all the places they used to go together, and flirting with all her friends.

Guess Elwurd isn’t as punk as she looks.

We learn that Elwurd’s ex is a jadeblood, and she gets the idea that we should pretend to be her new partner to fuck with the ex. Eesh. Also apparently troll jerking off can only be represented by ‘a complicated motion’, so xenobiologist headcanoners take note...

To be fair, last time it was to flee from the cops. That was a bit more serious.

The narration notes that there is no way for this to end except with you falling in love with her.

We get to choose between ‘Fake date.’ and ‘FAKE DATE!!’ so... yeah. So much for those misgivings! :D

Let’s be a little reserved...

If her looks weren’t lesbian enough... check out that poster.

Unfortunately, the ex turns out to be...

Hey there Bronya. And oh great, we’re in a lesbian love triangle with trolls.

By which I mean holy shit yes we’re in a lesbian love triangle with trolls!

They make a perfect couple!

We get dragged in as the fake date. Bronya is a little surprised and hurt that we’re with Elwurd. But, she insists, she’s just here for the sweater.

We’re still in Tagora’s robe. ...his bathrobe? We’ve been in a dressing gown this entire time?

Help I’m enjoying this dumb lesbian romcom stuff... I have simple tastes ok

Narrator gets some good ideas, occasionally. We get the magic f-word, and that rounds out the arc!

So what are our other options?

Well first, let’s see what kind of failure mode we get from picking the closer place to hang out this time...

This one gets an entire background!

Unfortunately, at this point she ditches us for a hotter troll girl.

Honestly!

Now if we’re a little too enthusiastic about the fake date...

Unfortunately, she takes this as a sign that we want to rebound from our own fake ex. We go along with this and she decides to take us out to get over our breakout. So I guess we won’t be seeing Bronya in this one...

Honestly. This lesbian troll is like... less given to petty cruelty than most trolls? We’ll take it!

Check out this troll hipster.

We’ve been taken to, it turns out, a lesbian coffee shop. Because we’re an alien, “nobody’s gonna ask”. Actually, what does that sign say? ...no, it just says coffee. However, it’s using the older, upside down Daedric alphabet used in Homestuck, instead of the newly created Alternian alphabet used elsewhere in the Hiveswap games...

And we’re here for...

Slam poetry.

Lesbians!

We agree, probably unwisely, to do some troll slam poetry. Or rather, excessive bodily force poetry. This is going to end sooo well. I mean, we already know we’re on the failure branch.

Unfortunately, troll slam poetry is...

...not that familiar. ‘Tubes and pushers and levers and sacs’. Eep.

Inevitably, also, troll slam poetry involves actual slamming. I was waiting for that joke to arrive.

I am really curious how this is gonna end.

Oh, trolls. ‘If our hate was real enough...’ God this is a fun episode.

This sounds like an exceptional idea. No way this can go wrong. We talk about knees and random Earth celebrities, and finish the performance by hitting ourself in the face.

Luckily, this doesn’t alienate Elwurd. She wants to know about our ‘fakeup’. Which is to say, she’s thinking about Bronya. What does our dear protag do...

They tell the truth about having lied. Elwurd is...

...not impressed. But I appreciate the Cowboy Bebop ref.

Honestly, of all the ways that could have ended, that’s not the worst.

I liked this arc. It had lesbians.

Kuprum and Folykl

This episode’s called “of text and envy, green”, and we’ve had envy in Elwurd’s route, so I’m guessing the next one is gonna be some kinda 4chan thing. Aysha U. Farah is back.

We wander into a poorer neighbourhood. Before long, we’re hiding in an alleyway.

The text on the Condesce posters - once again in upsidedown Daedric rather than the new font - says ‘OBEY’.

Our two trolls arrive on the scene with various kinds of ‘lol’ - and sure enough, > greentext notation.

To be more specific, Kuprum uses greentext, and Folykl (how’s that even pronounced? follicle?) puts in random spaces. Not sure which is which yet. Their theme song is kinda chiptunesy.

I don’t think even people on /b/ talk like this anymore! ...but maybe that’s just wishful thinking. I’m not gonna check.

We get to choose to stick up for ourself or take it lying down. Let’s get trolled.

They make fun of us some more and leave. Even the narrator thinks we dodged a bullet there.

So let’s ‘take it lying down’. The narration comments on this...

Apparently saving them the effort of dunking on us is an appealing trait, to Folykl at least. We learn that Kuprum - the boy - is psychic, while Folkyl has no eyes. Guessing she had them put out because her psychic powers were an issue or something, though why they didn’t just cull her...

heh

We are told that Kuprum really does straight up say ‘LOL’ out loud. And the reason that Folkyl doesn’t have eyes is a disease called ‘voidrot’ which only affects yellowbloods, meaning ‘her body doesn’t retain energy like it’s supposed to’.

The subject of Trizza comes up. I believe Trizza is the current Heir, predecessor to Feferi. Presumably at some point over the course of Hiveswap, she’s going to die.

The two have differing opinions...

The narrator decides to compliment on blackrom. The narration highlights that this is a weird thing to do, but that’s our narrator. They tell us they’re actually pale.

This leads us to the non-instant-death choice for this branch:

Let’s insult them. They’ll probably appreciate that.

Kuprum takes it as a challenge, like we’re making a move on Folkyl. I feel like our narrator doesn’t have long to live.

Anyway, this leads to Folykl approaching like...

And that leads to, uh... her kissing us and then...

this happening?

Yeah, I don’t even know what this chapter’s supposed to be about. 4chan kids with weird kinks?

And we get drained of our psychic energy, or something. Yeah uh... that was... fuck even knows. Aysha, you ok?

Well, let’s not insult people and get into a bizarre vampiric psychic energy smooch thing. Especially when like... how old is Folykl supposed to be?

So yeah we get judged as normie.

The narration grumbles about this assessment.

We move on, returning to the bluebloods lured into the square (by hacking their GPS, or some troll equivalent I forgot). The narrator tries to go meet them, and the 4chan kids remind us this is less ‘prank’ and more ‘class war’. One of the bluebloods goes to call the drones. A ‘chartered scuttlebus’ shows up, and we get more insults for trying to board it without having an appropriate hemospectrum rank.

Heh. There’s some rather explicit commentary about how violence is only acceptable in a certain direction in this society, and these kids couldn’t confront the bluebloods directly.

The drones show up and we make an exit. Unfortunately we meet a drone coming the other way, and the two kids are blasted apart.

The narrator manages to distract the drone long enough for Kuprum to wreck it. There are a lot of comments about our uselessness in a crisis.

Shit’s gotten a bit real, but you still gotta lol.

The narration makes some pointed comments...

And we get our friendship screen.

I really don’t know what to make of this chapter in all honesty. Like ok, getting to chill with a lesbian doing suitably dykey things, like relationship drama and slam poetry, was a lot of fun. And like, if it wasn’t for the failure branch, I’d be pretty happy with the 4chan dorks too.

But... what the heck was up with that branch where Folykl smooches you and drains your energy after you insult her relationship? That’s like... a very weird way for a chapter to go.

I feel like it was trying to make a point like... yeah they are kind of jerks to each other but they provide something important and really care under the ribbing, something about like... hurt people coming together in a horrific situation. But they could have made that point perfectly well without that whole ‘kissing the narrator suddenly’ thing which just felt really uncomfortable.

All the same, there we go. Three friends for the price of two!