#gonna put him in a salad spinner

[frnkiebby]

why is he so tiny

putting him in my pocket

just a smol boi. tiny. itty bitty.~🎃

[unlawful-waffle]

Renfield’s my poor little meow meow now

[columboscreens]

[ace-dodo]

"you like the new special event? Personally i-"

GENSHINNNNN

PUT GA MING IN ANY QUEST OR EVENT OR JUST GIVE ME CONTENT ABOUT HIM

AND MY LIFE, IS YOURS

[garlictoastedbread]

Today is my birthday, sorry for not uploading stuff uhhh-

Here’s a Mike for the inconvenience :D (wip)

[bravevolunteer]

@nineliabilityrisk asked: " why are you looking at me like that ? " jeremy. certainly not referring to the gay staring not at all- // dusty toybox

MICHAEL DOESN'T EVEN REALIZE until Jeremy questions him, blinking abruptly as his surroundings come rushing back all at once. He remembers trailing off as the conversation came to a natural lull, gaze set on Jeremy, and... how long had he been staring? It must have been too much, with the way Jeremy is looking at HIM now, to which Michael immediately begins to backtrack. He breaks eye contact immediately as he desperately searches for anything to distract with. Any reason to pretend he wasn't spending the time they were supposed to choose what to order caught up in how damn attractive he thinks Jeremy is.

"I... zoned out." It isn't a lie, not technically— he doesn't have to say WHY— but doubting that's enough to convince him, Michael decides to divert. He picks up the straw paper he had already been absentmindedly fiddling with, tossing it directly at Jeremy's beautiful face ( and hoping his focus on swatting it away will give enough time for the embarrassed burning at his face to go down ). "Pick your food, dumbass." Bold words from someone who hasn't looked at the menu ONCE yet, only picking it up now that he's used it to change the subject. They're at some shitty diner ( a normal one ), and clearly, Michael doesn't really care what he gets or where they are. "Have you, uh... been to this place before?" He just barely holds back from wincing at himself immediately; If THAT'S the best he could fucking do, he deserved to get caught staring.

[raointean]

Funniest responses* to the "What does "Blorbo" mean?" question

(In reference to my silmarillion fandom linguistics project, the results of which you can find in my "survey says" tag)

*not necessarily the full response, some are just fragments from longer responses. Also, I'm not filtering by "correct" or "incorrect" responses

Special Little Guy (gender neutral)

Lmao. That's like, my special little guy. He takes up my brain space. I'm rotating him.

you know how lilo from lilo and stitch has that doll she made, complete with backstory? basically like that

one's blorbo is a character one cares a lot about. it kind of has like... condescending or woobifying connotations? like expressing that Maedhros is your blorbo is sort of uh... one imagines like, a chibi Maedhros. cute, not scary. but it doesn't necessarily imply the speaker has distorted perception of the character in general, just a sort of fondness

The character a person wants to use as a doll/stuffed animal

A character who the author loves too much (and knows it)

"OMG Blorbo was in the new trailer for 5 seconds!" is a common statement

which often provokes... strange thoughts at 11pm.

Beloved character who you think about entirely too much and also enjoy putting in Situations

It implies some degress of being pathetic as well.

No relation to Blorbo Baggins.

The character you put under a microscope, put through the cheese grater, put into the salad spinner, and squeeze like a plushie.

A beloved character whom you want to both stick in a microwave and protect with all you have

character one fangirls* over (*gender neutral)

Just a little guy, whom I am deeply enamored of and just want to squish on the head and see what happens.

Favourive character, often pathetic, someone to pity as much as love

obsessed. baby. Will run my mouth off about them

the word "favorite" wasn't enough to encapsulate "the exact kind of character made specifically for me in the lab" either. my friendgroup started calling those types of characters "callouts" because they were calling you out by existing Exactly To Your Tastes

(not necessarily in a way that condones their actions, but deeply beloved nonetheless)

The "cinnamon roll" kind. Idk I love Namo but I'd never call him a blorbo, it just wouldn't feel right.

??

dear?

My personal favourite character, whom I want to adopt even if he's a dark lord

A particularly beloved (or beloathed-in-a-positive-way) character.

Generally seem to be problematic favs.

I think it was originally meant to be somewhat mocking, but it was wholeheartedly adopted and is now used unironically.

A favored character that usually is subjected to great amounts of trauma and or fluff.

A favourite character, usually male

The obsession character

Feanor/character you are unreasonably attached to esp. if they are a Bad Person TM

The character who is most special and beloved to you (and often that means you're gonna put them through The Horrors)

a character that makes you chew on the bars of your enclosure

Special little character from my shows(tm)

usually having an aura of kicked wet puppy (brimby)

You'd build a shrine to them

Idk, ask the children 😹. Er. Hot character you like? I'm sure people have very complex definitions explaining why they like the hot character but I don't take fandom that seriously.

Your guy (gender neutral), not a comfort character, but perhaps a character you would like to see experience the worst situations possible (affectionate)

occasionally blorbo from my floor (my cat)

Just a widdle pathetic guy 🥺😈

A favourite character, thuogh usually one you squash like a stress ball or squeaky toy rather than put gently on a shelf

Ungoliant

Guy (gender neutral) who I hold in my hand like a neat rock and look at

character whom i will put in a glass and shake

character you are putting in the metaphorical salad spinner

A favourite character, often a war criminal treated like they did nothing wrong, they are a little kitty

(character you're particularly attached to and usually put in physically and/or mentally torturous situations for fun)

A character you’ve imprinted on and like seeing in misery. They’re your wet cat you enjoy pouring water on but also toweling off

Your favorite character, to whom no harm may come (except in the service of angst)

my guy. my friend my buddy. the person

Literally your favourite ever character, but not like you want to f*ck them, more like "how much can i let them suffer?"

Your favouritest character from media that you like to put in all kinds of situations, but is not morally problematic.

favourite character you want to bully

a fictional character that you like to an obsessive amount, typically more than other favourite characters; your specialist little guy; someone you are unwell about; you don’t always have to like your blorbo per day but they must take up constant thought space

[phantomrose96]

You know after Faulkner's season 2 betrayal I thought I was gonna spend the rest of the series just kinda mad at him. But he really really nailed the boy-king descent into madness for season 3. I had him spinning so fast upon a single axis as to appear immobile before I even realized I was rotating him in my head. A truly sudden and violent propulsion into blorbo status. I want to write 10-page essays about him. I want to put him in the salad spinner. I want to relisten to whatever the FUCK that was when he drowned Sibling Rane.

[just-a-itty-bitty-kitty]

(hope I'm doing this right) Opportunist for the bingo game? :)

HERE HE IS!! THE BASTARD!! Opportunist is such a scrawny skrunkly little fella I wanna throw him out the window and light him on fire and squeeze him so hard he pops and put him in a salad spinner and hgfhbdyzjhxjwdhuwjxu

I have an unhealthy love for extremely flawed characters. Taking into account his well hidden self-worth issues and the need for validation, is it really a surprise that he's my favorite?? and if he's my favorite, that means I want him to suffer sooo bad god if I ever actually make a fanfic or au or anything this mf is gonna get ittttt just u wait

I also really like to think that he's capable of feeling guilty, but it gets repressed a lot, and he doesn't think he(or Witch) can get better, if that makes sense?? so that's why mf doesn't trust Thorn for a second. There's comfort in knowing that while you might be awful, there's someone else who is just as bad. So, if she actually changed, what does that mean for him?

I could go on, but imma stop here or this post will become 8274929726371839 characters long

[mcsm-confessions]

I HATE WHITE BOY JESSE IM GONNA BURN HIM ALIVE AND PUT HIM IN A SALAD SPINNER AND PISS ON HIS WIFE AND KILL HIM AND WATERBOARD HIM AND AND

~~~

[kens-ramblings]

Hello me with brain worms again (Tim version this time)! this is gonna sound insane so just hear me out right. per usual this can be whatever ship you want idgaf.

so tim is a singer who is in a situationship with whoever you prefer. he loves them, but feels like they only see him as a warm body yk. he writes ceilings by Lizzy McAlpine and preforms it at a concert that he knows his fwb will be at and then the fwb is like,,, “holy shit is this abt me??? no way he def doesn’t like me like that”(to add angst i like to think they have a no kissing rule in place bc it makes sense w/ the lyrics). some time passes but now the fwb is stuck on the song and is now like “shit maybe i like tim but there’s no way he likes me too” but then tim drops a double feature of once more to see you by mitski and you’re all i want by cigarettes after sex and maybe those songs include definite references to their relationship(you can also pick which lines are specific to them). so they are like “holy shit!! no way!!! i gotta go kiss this man rn!” but then when they see tim after the show and tim thinks that they are only kissing him to like appease him and not because they actually want to. and then a bunch of miscommunication and angst ensues. and yeah,, idk where it would go from there but i think it’d be very angst but eventually they do end up together and tim now gets to write cute and happy love songs.

this only even popped in my head bc those three songs randomly played one after the other on my playlist while i was reading tim angst so,,, yeah

if this rambling somehow inspires you please write a fic and tag me i love reading tim being put through a salad spinner

[frnkiebby]

his hands are fucking killing me~🎃

[thedevilundercover]

Fae Tim? ( ・◇・)？

:)

Hi Anon!

I actually have a Fae Tim series that I think I don’t talk too much about. I should actually talk more about it bc I freaking love it. (Link here if you want to check it out)

I was trying to get a subtle cryptid vibe from Tim if you know what I mean. He’s just a lonely little man guys. I’m gonna put him through a salad spinner tho

Please ask me about this AU I'm dying to talk about it more

[eyeballsoup7310]

So preface. I was gonna put this in the tags of a reblog of this post about how all of the bayou boys suck (affectionate), but that post is Rolan-centric and my rant wasn’t so I’m just making my own post. But the Rolan post is really good too and you should read it. Anyways here’s the ramble

The guys are all assholes and that's the point. people are jerks sometimes and people get into bad arguments and people leave each other over stupid things, and that's the point! (to me anyways). People suck! People are the worst! And yet they still do good, they still risk everything for each other, even when angry. Rolan still dies for his town, even after it kills him, and he still trusts Rand to finish the job even after constant fights, and he still trusts kian enough -even in death- to repeat his Song. Rand still believes post-metamorphosis Rolan even after all trust has been broken, and he still believes in Kian even when Kian's basically signed his death certificate for Becky. Kian admits something he's ashamed of (on top of dropping the fact he likes guys sometimes), probably to make Rolan feel less like a 'freak' at the tree, even knowing that they'll roast the hell out of him for it in the same the way he roasted Rolan.

The bayou boys are assholes and yet they love each other and it makes them so human even if they physically aren't. It makes sense to me that that's the way the story went, with Rachel being the final boss. She's just a kid and her brother and his friends were rude to her. She never saw the other side of that, she never got an apology. You can hurt someone and, even though those moments of shittiness don’t necessarily define you as a person, it doesn’t remove the pain you’ve caused them.

I love this damn campaign and I love these characters. I’m putting them into a salad spinner and watching them rotate very quickly

[merakiui]

First thing first, I must apologize for the upcoming ramble in all caps that I'm abt to place in your ask. Now that's out of the way, let's get in to this.

Okay, so I've now finished TMDG and all I can say is:

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA HOLY FUCKING SHIT--

THAT WAS SO WORTH THE WAIT OH MY GODD-- You've outdone yourself once again, Mera. YOU REALLY COOKED AND SERVED THIS ONE. MIGHT I SAY, YOU"VE BESTOWED US WITH A MAGNIFICENT FEAST 👏👏👏 😭😭😭✨✨✨

I really am unable to put my thoughts into words; they all just come out incoherent. Like, HOW THE HELL DID YOU EVEN MANAGE TO DRAG ME EVEN DEEPER INTO JADE LEECH HELL??? I AM EXPERIENCING SO MANY EMOTIONS THROUGHOUT READING THIS PIECE THAT I"M NO LONGER ON A ROLLERCOASTER RIDE ー NO, I"VE ASCENDED TO AN EMOTIONAL PLANE I DON'T THINK ANY MAN COULD DESCRIBE OTZ OTZ OTZ

Memes for visualization:

When you said MC was gonna be obsessive towards Floyd I was not expecting it to be that obsessive (not as hardcore as our Jade here, but i don't think no one could ever compare to our eel here). SHE"S SO DELUSIONAL I"M CACKLING-- and AAAAA SHE REALLY IS PERFECT WITH JADE, they truly are a match made in madness <3 I really love their banter, like they're already married to each other for decades and more (and god they will)

I was so filled with suspicion reading this fic cause the switch between Jade to Floyd really got me, "Is this really really Floyd??". It's nice to see that my suspicion came to fruition in the most agonizing way :))

AND JADE!!! Jadeee 🥺🥺🥺 how can you make one eel so- so-- UGHHHH infuriating?? So devious?? So gentle?? So loving?? So terrifying?? So many things at once that i can't help but put my feelings in a salad spinner??? Every moment that he was just being fluffy really got me swooning, only to get the reminder that he's indeed a cunning slippery eel (which just makes me fall even harder for him). Oohhh when he laid his feelings bare to be seen, when he's just... honest about it. He's just soo so so in love i just want to cry about it ueueueue..

I also like when MC is like: "I can never tell what goes thru Jade's head."

Jade: *Says the most poetic shit abt how he adores her like she's the moon.*

MC: "HE"S LYING!!"

Truly, i think TMDG has become my favorite fic of all time <33 this is such a wonderful way to end my year ✨✨

And so to end my ask, Happy New Years Mera!! Thank you for writing The Most Dangerous Game and all the other wonderful writings that have accompanied me throughout this year <33 Really, your posts are some of things I always look forward to read everyday. Wishin you another wonderful year to come, and hope you take care ✨✨💕💕

AAAAAAA OMG OMG THANK YOU!!!! THANK YOU SO SO SOSOSO MUCH!!!!! ♡(╥﹏╥) I'm very happy knowing it was worth the wait and that it could make you feel so many emotions!!!! It is my job to drag everyone even further into Jade hell!!!! >:D

Reader is so delusional omg!!! She's so silly... I loved writing her interactions with Jade because she really is just so perfect for him. orz delusional x obsessive...... waaaa truly the most crazy match of all time! They're so perfect for each other, but neither realizes it yet. Reader, you're pining for the wrong eel!!!!! I hoped to convey just how naturally Jade and Reader click, whereas with Floyd there's some sort of awkward strain. >_< Jade and Reader are so married!!!!!!! <3 Azul can be the priest and Floyd can be best eel at their wedding because Jade couldn't have done it if it weren't for Floyd (and Reader's obsessive attachment to him).

Jade is so many things in this fic,,, a conniving eel at heart. >:( but I love him when he's like that. I'm so happy he had you swooning!!! For all of his sleazy ways, he's extremely sweet when he's so gentle and honest about his feelings. AAAAA HE'S SO HEAD OVER HEELS/FINS FOR YOU!!!!!!! (∩˃o˂∩) and I'm glad you liked those parts of Reader being unable to believe a thing Jade says. T_T he is opening his chest for her to explain the truths locked away in his heart, and she's still questioning it......

Thank you so very much for reading TMDG and for writing such a kind message!!! I love those reaction images as well LOL. They illustrate how I felt while writing this story hehe!! <3 I am wishing you the happiest of new year!!!!!!! Thank you for accompanying me through 2023! :D sending you lots of love and wonderful things for your 2024!!!!!!!! (ᴗ͈ˬᴗ͈)ꕤ.ﾟ

[absolutelyzoned]

i wish there was more val velocity content i need to rip him to shreds with my teeth and beat him up and put him through a meat grinder and smooch him on the forehead and hug him and shoot him with my ray gun and ghost him and step on him and tell him its gonna be okay and put him in a salad spinner and