#gonna do when i move out. like i am a grown woman and i should be able to choose how i spend my two precious weekend days. and my dad is a

[pepprs]

my mom isn’t letting my dad go back to his office bc him being out of the house stresses her out and makes her have a flare up and it’s like kind of insane. like i understand why the idea of him doing that would make her panicky and angry as someone who also struggles w separation anxiety and abandonment shit / has physical symptoms from that kind of stress (though not to the same degree ofc) but also he is a grown man. he should be allowed to go to his office and not have to shape his entire life around her needs. and she keeps guilt tripping him out of it and it’s impacting his quality of life a lot and the whole thing is kind of… hm

[strawberryspence]

They both have different stories when asked, “When did you first meet?”

Steve says it was in school, along the hallways with freshman Steve Harrington and sophomore Eddie Munson locking eyes for the first time. Eddie says it was in a party, drinking beer and selling drugs, a transaction.

Wayne Munson knows the truth. The truth that way before monsters, way before creatures from games came true, way before the end of the world, way before everything, that Eddie and Steve have already met.

Wayne remembers that day so clearly. A social worker coming to his work in the middle of the day looking for him. Something about Wayne being the closest relative, about his brother going to jail and his mother running away.

Eddie's been living alone for two weeks. Two weeks. Cooking and cleaning for himself, the only reason it got suspicious is because he didn't go to school and one of his teachers called home.

He watches as Eddie swings himself at the empty playground. He brought Eddie here because— where do you bring children? Playgrounds are perfect right? He doesn't have the slightest idea as to what he's doing.

Sometimes in the morning, Wayne doesn't even have clothes to wear because he forgot to do the laundry. It's the same reason he doesn't have a wife and children. If he can't take care of himself, how could he take care of a whole other human being?

Out of nowhere, there's a kid running to the playground. Stopping just in front of Eddie and introducing himself with a bright smile.

His nephew stares at the boy for a few seconds before answering, "Hi, I am Eddie."

Wayne listens to them chatter for a few more minutes, before the boy asks if Eddie wants to be pushed.

Eddie's still giving the other boy a look of disbelief, before he finally says yes.

The boy's guardian sits beside Wayne. She looks better off, with an expensive looking coat and purse. But there's a warm, comforting smile on her face.

She turns to Wayne, “Is that your son?”

Wayne turns to her, pursing his lips, “I— Yes— No— It’s complicated.” He sighs. He doesn't even know what Eddie is to him now. “He’s my nephew. I just got custody of him today.”

“Oh.” The woman breathes out. Wayne turns back to the kids, Eddie's laughing now and it's music to his ears.

Wayne spills his heart to the random stranger, some part of his heart knowing that it will be safe with her.

“I don’t know what I am doing. I can barely take care of myself, let alone a child.” Wayne starts, “But he’s never got a good home and I want to give that to him.”

She smiles at him, "Just the fact that you want to give him a good home is telling me that you’ll be just fine. Don’t overthink it, life’s too short for that.”

It hits Wayne straight to his chest. He still doesn't know what exactly to do, but he feels better knowing that he has a chance to give Eddie the home he deserves.

“Thank you.” Wayne says, smiling at the woman as they watch the kids giggle and play.

“Steve’s your boy?” Wayne asks.

She beams back at him, answering without missing a beat, “Yeah, he’s my boy. Not my son, just my nephew. But I love him like he’s mine.”

Oh. Well, isn't that just perfect? Wayne softens and thinks— huh— she does understand.

When the time comes, Wayne watches as Eddie says a tearful goodbye with the other boy. There's daisies in his hair, like it grows right with his hair and Eddie has one tucked between his ears. It's intimate, the picture perfect to describe puppy love.

Eddie stands and waves at the boy's moving car, until he can't even see it anymore. And then, Eddie looks at him, "Where do I go now?"

Wayne stoops on his knees to see him eye to eye, "You're coming home with me. But before that we're gonna go get some milkshakes, does that sound good with you, Ed?"

Eddie looks at him curiously, brown eyes staring at him, "Do you have money for that?"

It floors Wayne, how grown up this child is. Eddie deserves to know nothing about this. In his age, he should be thinking about playing and making friends and being a child. No, Eddie is concerned if Wayne has enough money for a fucking milkshake.

"Of course, I have money for that, Ed!" Wayne laughs, patting his head. He stands, hoping it'll hide the pain in his eyes.

"Okay." Eddie answers. Wayne offers his hand for him to take, Eddie stares at it.

"Let's go?" Wayne asks, and Eddie nods, finally taking his hand, "Let's go."

From that day on, Wayne swears to protect Eddie, give him the home he deserves. He changes his shift to the evening one so he can stay home with him, gave him his room so he can have the privacy he deserves. Wayne loves Eddie like he's his own.

Even when Eddie finally comes out, that love didn't falter, "Hey, Wayne?"

Wayne turns to him. Eddie's bigger now, curly hair growing into longer wisps. He's wearing a vest with patches, they sewed it together months ago. "Yeah?"

"Remember that boy? In the playground with daisies in his hair? The day you took me home?" Wayne hums, nodding.

Eddie stares at him, arms crossed like a shield, "Yeah, he was my first love."

Wayne blinks at him.

"And I think— well— I know. I am gay."

Wayne nods, "Alright."

He turns to turn off the stove. Sits down and talks to Eddie, makes sure he knows that he can't be out because it's too dangerous, makes sure he knows that there's nothing wrong with loving another man.

And at the end of the night, Wayne tucks him in, just before he goes to work, kisses his forehead and says him, "I love you, Ed. Nothing will ever change that."

-

It's not until years later that he sees the boy from the playground again. Wayne's pretty sure he saw him in a few of the local papers, but he wasn't really sure, the pictures are too blurry, too small.

But this— this is the clearest picture Wayne has ever seen and he's damn sure that the boy sleeping beside Eddie's hospital bed is the boy with the daisies.

Wayne coughs, and the boy immediately springs back to life. It's odd. It's the same boy, only older. But there's so much weariness in his eyes, the same look Wayne has seen on war veterans. He still has brown hair, smooth and golden.

Eddie wakes up right after him, eyes bleary, with a small smile as soon as he sees him, "Uncle Wayne. I love you."

It's the first thing Eddie's said to him after a week of missing. Wayne chokes with tears. He moves closer to hug Eddie, tears in his eyes.

There was a time that he thought he'd never be able to do this again, that this was the end. Wayne was ready to burn this whole town, the whole world even, for whatever they've been doing to his pure, innocent nephew.

But he's here, alive and awake in front of Wayne and he thinks he can finally, finally breathe again.

"Never do that to me again, Ed. Never."

Eddie chuckles, "Alright. I promise."

"I love you too, okay?" Eddie nods.

They separate and for a few solid seconds, they all just stare at each other before Eddie speaks again, "Oh, uhm, Uncle Wayne, this is Steve. Steve, this is my Uncle Wayne."

Steve immediately stands up, shaking his hand earnestly. Wayne stares at Eddie, waits for any indication that he knows, remembers that this boy was his first love.

Nothing.

Nada.

After breaking every NDA he signed and telling Wayne every little tidbit of his crazy week, Eddie finally falls asleep again with the help of a handful of drugs.

Wayne takes his chance, just before Steve goes to go and check on their other friend, the Mayfield kid.

"Hey, kid?" Steve stops on his tracks, before facing him.

"Sir?"

Wayne scoffs, "None of that Sir stuff. Wayne would do. I just have a question."

"What is it, si— Wayne?" Steve blinks at him, lips pursing at the obvious mistake.

"Do you have an aunt?" Steve looks visibly taken back, eyes widening.

"Yes. I have." He blanches, "I did."

Oh. Oh, no.

"You did?" Wayne asks; he knows what the answer is but he still wants to know what happened to that woman from the playground that day. The same one that he still thinks of when he has a tough time.

Wayne has always thought that they'll meet again someday, that he'll get to thank her for that one conversation. He missed his chance.

"She died when I was a kid. Cancer." Steve answers, his voice quivering for a split second, "Why do you ask? Did you know her?"

Wayne shakes his head, "No. I don't think so. You just reminded me of someone, and guess I got it wrong."

Steve nods his head, accepting his answer wholeheartedly, "Goodnight, Wayne."

And Wayne watches, as the door closes shut behind Steve, "Goodnight, daisy boy."

-

Steve and Eddie, Wayne thinks, are utter idiots.

First, they dance together for ages before they finally get their act together and date. Wayne might've as well held a white poster paper with "KISS" written on it behind them.

Second, they fight over when they first meet and none of them are even right. Wayne is exhausted, listening to them argue about it day and night.

Third, they're blind. Literally blind.

The day of their wedding, Wayne hoped that the two boys would finally realize that they've met that day on the park. He asked that nice girl, Nancy, to pick some daisies and to put it on Steve's hair for the ceremony. While, Wayne went out to pick one to tuck behind Eddie's ear.

As Wayne watched as the two boys proclaim their love for each other in front of their family, with daisies tucked in their hairs just like the day they first met; he's overcome with the feeling of joy and happiness over the fact that the two boys still found each other even after everything.

It's ridiculous watching them not recognize each other, so Wayne finally decided to end their (his) misery.

Eddie clinks a glass with a fork, "Uncle Wayne! Speech!" There's a flurry of clinking before Wayne finally stands up.

"Alright, alright. I'll do it." They laugh, putting down their glasses.

It's a small backyard wedding. The Hopper-Byers has decked the yard with bright lights that brightened the whole night. In the middle, there's one long table to fit all of them. On the end of the table, side-by-side, is Eddie and Steve.

"Alright, I have a confession to make." Everyone straightens up in anticipation.

"I know it's been a running debate between Steve and Eddie, as to who's right about where and when they first met." Wayne can hear Eddie saying, "It's me obviously!"

"Settle down, boy." Wayne says, making them laugh.

"The truth is they're both wrong. You both have been very blind to the truth." Eddie makes an appalled noise as Steve laughs.

"The truth is I know when they first met." Eddie squints at him, confused. Steve whispers something to his ear that Eddie answers with a shrug.

"Steve and Eddie first met as kids. It was the same day I got custody of Eddie. I bought him to the park after that, let him play, you know? Out of no where, this kid—" Wayne chuckles.

"This kid comes up to Eddie, introduces himself and asks if Eddie wants to be pushed. His aunt— his aunt was very kind to me even though I was a complete stranger spilling my guts out to her."

"When it was time to leave, Eddie says goodbye to this kid, and it was so intimate. I remember thinking it was the perfect picture for puppy love. The boy goes home with daisies tucked in his hair, while Eddie goes home with one in his ear."

"It's not until years later, when Eddie came out to me that he tells me that the same boy with the daisies was his first love. And it's not until a few more years later after that, when I first meet the daisy boy again, sleeping beside Eddie's bed in the hospital."

Wayne turns to Steve and Eddie, there's pure surprise in their faces as they watch and listen to Wayne's speech.

"I could never really forget about that day and that boy. The way he made my nephew happy on one of the worst days of his lives. And now, he gets to make Eddie happy for the rest of their lives." Wayne sniffs, hiding it with a fake cough.

"Love is iffy." Wayne says, causing everyone to chuckle, "But what you guys have? It's been set into stone way before you knew each other. That's as true as love can ever be and I hope you nurture and care for it for the rest of your lives."

There's no dry eye in the yard. Wayne's heart is full and content, because he's sure that his son will be happy and taken care for, for the rest of their lives.

Wayne raises his glass,

"A toast to the daisy boys."

-

→ Annalyn's POV | BONUS

(thank you for the overwhelming love for Annalyn's POV! i am so glad y'all liked it. 💗)

TAGS: @7-starboi @emly03 @a-new-kind-of-blue @leather-and-freckles @tiny-enthusiast @cherrycolas-things @the-redthread @lady-silkwing @ancielsol @sunshine1066 @lifeisnotsobadonceyoustopcaring @makewavesandwar @hunterbow04 @resident-gay-bitch @swimmingbirdrunningrock @bidisastersworld

[cyborgartalchemist2]

Imagine being so fucking aggressive about a ship you make jokes about Magneto and that very groomer scene from X-Men 97 that just... excuse the behavior? Because that doesn't sound very progressive in my opinion. Like yeah... rape culture in relationships just permeats fucking shipping but lets do nothing to argue against it. Lets make jokes that perpetuate the behavior and excuse men taking advantage of women.

To me having Magneto take advantage of a much younger mutant under his tutelage because she's desperate for physical connection and he's the only one she can touch is meant to showcase A) how Gambit contrasts Magneto and B) remind us that Magneto is never above using mutants for his own gains.

If this were reality most people would be calling Magneto a groomer and worse. We know Rogue was still a teen when Mystique took her in. We know that she's been an X-man for a few years. So Magneto was patient enough to wait until she turned 18?

Historically he hasn't done well with his love life. Scarlet Witch and Quicksilver's mom left him without telling him he fathered children because she was scared of him! (I'm only going on TAS and 97 here since this is an adaptation.) So where in the high heavens does everyome think he would be good for Rogue?

I don't care about the 'better than Remy' arguments because that's not the point! The point of who you ship Rogue with should be about if it's a relationship that is good for her! Is she their equal? Does she get treated with respect? Magneto looked at the Genosha council and without asking Rogue said "I'll lead but only if this woman I am trying to get back is my queen". LIKE DOES THAT EVEN SOUND MATURE? Magneto shows up, sees Gambit and Rogue being even mildly affectionate and starts pulling asshole moves on Rogue. And the narrative did nothing to make Rogue stand up for herself (which she would have) she should have told Erik "I'm a big girl I can get my own sugar for my coffee." She is shown numerous times to remind everyone she is no one's 'territory'.

Also wish to address the fact that making Rogue x Magneto comes with a 'sex is the only thing that matters!' Flavor that is exactly what so many of us are tired of in shipping. When did shipping stop being about the drama of a couple fighting against a narrative that pushes them apart or about finding love in the most unconventional of places, like alien hunting? And become solely about how nasty they can fuck? Seriously?

AND it's so blandly hetero it's not even funny. Because honestly the ways in which a couple can experience pleasure that don't involve traditional p in v penetration is vast and wild and there are enough types of gear and costumes and the like to facilitate that between Rogue and Gambit. Because that's all the argument has to stand on, is which man can fulfill her sexual needs. WHICH SHE HERSELF REALIZED WASN'T ENOUGH. She kisses Erik and goes "nope they're ain't any sparks there. This isn't going to be fulfilling ever."

Not to mention the fact that I can't genuinely see Magneto offering to die for Rogue. Sorry that grandstanding in Genosha was not the same. It was barely a heroic move... he still didn't save the Morlocks he promised to protect... he still failed. He couldn't save Leech and he couldn't stop the Sentinel either. Because yeah Magneto attempted to save Rogue and Gambit, but he did nothing to save the Morlocks at his side and he also survived without taking out the giant killer robot... but Gambit? Gambit said fuck it, gonna take this motherfucker to hell with me. He stopped Rogue from facing the sentinel so he could. And he actually stopped it. All on his own. Because that's what an x-man would do. Sure Magneto protectdd two people but sacrificed the morlocks yet again...

AND ON THE SUBJECT OF ROGUE x GAMBIT

Has Gambit always been great with Rogue? No, but that was the 90s and now look at how he handles shit? Comics writing has grown. It was a lot more heternormative and still had lots of rape culture hold overs in it.

Look at the episode when Cody shows up. He uses Rogue's connection to him from the past and then puts her in a situation that almost takes away her humanity. Her powers, which was what lured her into this trap in the first place, saved her from a man taking advantage of her. And the one time Gambit (in TAS) takes advantage of her, Morph in her form, told him to come and get some from her first. (So while he should have paused and woke Rogue up before kissing her, he had what he thought was an invitation.)

Gambit takes Rogue's decision to rule Genosha with Magneto incredibly well. He doesn't get mad, he doesn't call Rogue names, he doesn't do anyhting to hurt Rogue the way she is hurting him. He accepts it like a gentleman. Unlike Magneto who pursued Rogue's affections in unhealthy ways.

So uh... yeah that's my fucking rant.

[louisferrignojr]

gotta say that i disagree that nobody fights for buck. in s5 taylor said it best: buck's life is full of meaningful relationships, actually. every person of the firefam would fight for and support buck. he is and will never be alone again in his life, especially during the hard times (which they reiterated in 8x05). meanwhile, we see thus being contrasted with tommy not having any kind if support system like that. the same seemed to be the case for taylor. i know people want tommy to fight for this, and i agree that i definitely need him to check his trauma and fears to work this out with buck. but buck is the main character that has had seasons of alleged development. he died and came back, got clarity, was supposed to finally feel good in his own skin, worked out his childhood trauma with his parents in therapy, formed a support system, now discovered he is bisexual and felt free with it. and now tommy is the only one who should grovel? i get the idea but. evan buckley is the character we have seen grow and learn. i want him to put in the work as well. look at how he fought for his job when he thought he would lose it forever. THAT is what i need from him rn. if he is just giving this up with a shrug, then i don't want bucktommy in canon. we have seen tommy taking care of buck and supporting him in all his shenanigans. i need to see that buck is absolutely serious about this and ready to fight for it. if he doesn't, he still hasn't found his true love or still doesn't know what he wants in life. i am bored by this. we have been here multiple times already. do something else with evan buckley finally or just allow him to be a bachelor forever.

okay yes buck has meaningful platonic and familial relationships.

no romantic partner has fought for him. abby ghosted him because of her own issues even though she's a fucking grown ass woman, ali got a reality check and broke up with him when he was in recovery after nearly dying, which okay, fair enough. and while i believe taylor did nothing wrong in reporting the jonah story, the narrative wants us to think she prioritised her work, and she did betray buck's trust which, again, buck wanted to protect his firehouse (which is his family) so he wasn't being objective. reporters exposing scandals within govt orgs that are supposed to protect the public is not a bad thing, actually. the only time he's broken up with someone first is natalia and we were told it's because she was obsessed with his died-and-came-back experience.

and listen. i love tommy more than anything. but buck is still the main character. we're going to see buck going through the breakup, not tommy. we're not going to get much about tommy's past. we're not going to get any scenes with tommy and another character if buck isn't also there. you remember karen going to chimney and them day drinking together because they thought hen was being unfaithful (again)? i wish we could see tommy and chimney talking about their buckleys. but the way the show got rid of all minor characters and consistently treats LIs as nothing more than LIs... i'm not hopeful. we'll get one scene with tommy's Explanation and i'm not even hopeful it's gonna be well written (but i'm sure lou will be serving. god. they wrote such a shitty break up scene and he fucking ATE.)

yeah, buck fucked up by jumping the gun and asking tommy to move in with him when he couldn't even say the i love you, and i hope this will be addressed in future eps. but tommy immediately ended the relationship because he Knows Better and left buck heartbroken. this is what happened on the show. the average viewer isn't doing ten layers of analysis to understand tommy's perspective, nor should they have to. i love the metas, i'm digging into tommy's headspace in my next fix it fic, but this is still the dumb weewoo show.

i don't think tommy needs to grovel, i don't think he's the Bad Guy in this story, i have a lot of empathy for tommy and so does the GA! they're not mad at tommy, they want him back! they want bucktommy back! and i want them both to fight for each other, to apologise and admit to their fuck ups and admit how much they care about each other and that they want to be each other's forever love! i want them to say i love you!

but buck is still the protagonist in this story and i don't want to see him running back to someone who broke up with him in such a way that had him asking "wait, did you just break up with me?" because again, this is what happened on our screens. i want tommy making the first move, opening the door for reconciliation, showing that he knows he made a mistake out of fear from his past trauma, for buck to then know he is wanted, that tommy came back for him, and then put in the effort to fight for them.

hope this makes sense. and as always, for people reading this - this is not the space for you to bash on buck's previous LIs, please take it elsewhere.

[tapwater118]

The Post-Split Rant, part 3

a.k.a.: Grown Woman really should have finished this like 3 weeks ago give me a break

Part 1 | Part 2

yes i did just section the parts out like this just for the visual gag shut up

BFB Post-Split is my least favorite season, so now I’m gonna wrap up my whinging about it and move on with my life. These are my opinions, you’re free to disagree, bluh bluh bluh let’s just get on with it already.

BFB 28

Okay, I said I would talk about the eliminated contestants here, but I remember them doing more in this episode than they actually did for some reason. I guess I’ll get to them in BFB 29 I suppose.

Anyway the Announcer is back! Announcer’s actually my favorite host out of all the seasons (sorry Four), so when I watched this the first time I remember being really stoked to see him again. And I am glad to say they did him very nicely! He still has his slightly snarky demeanor (in spite of his monotone TTS voice), and is overall used in a very interesting way here. I’ll get more into it later, but it is very clear they didn’t just bring him back for nostalgia points, which I appreciate.

For an “all-in-one” challenge, this episode did it a lot better than BFDI 23, dare I say. Instead of spending a bit too long on the first few challenges and speeding by the rest, they spend time just on the challenges that they can get good bits out of and briskly walk past the others. I feel this approach works a lot better than BFDI 23.

Honestly, pretty nice episode. No real issues here. Not as good as BFB 20 or 26 I’d say, but a good deal better than BFB 22. Moving on.

BFB 29

They said it was impossible. They said it couldn’t be done. Post-Split actually has a second good Taco and Blocky interaction. They’re having an actual conversation! With witty banter and such!What is this wizardry? Why couldn’t we have more like this?

Not related to anything else really but I have to get this out. I find the over abundance of nicknames in Post-Split to be kind of grating at times but NOTHING grinds my gears as much as the stupid “blank”-ster nicknames. “Tacster” “Blockster” “Teadster” SHUT UUUUUUUPPPPPP. They’re just fine in isolation but they use them SO FREQUENTLY I HATE IT. Gelatin uses these the most and I honestly think it’s lessened my opinion of him to a non-negligible degree. Leafster is the only one that gets a past the rest suck so much shit.

Ok sub-rant over. Back on topic.

The whole, well not really backstory… interstory(?) they give Announcer here is very neat, I like it. Really adds a lot of depth to his character. Whoa, Post-Split just had compelling character development. I think I need to sit down. I guess I’ll also add here that it’s nice Taco has something to do other than whinge at Blocky. I mean, there’s a handful of other characters just kinda sitting around that they could also have investigating the Announcer, but I feel Taco fits this role the best (out of the characters available to do so).

The quality-downgrading bit near the end is also fun too- okay enough beating around the bush. I’ll talk about it here because I already have enough to say about BFB 30 on its own; they pretty obviously set Flower up to win. Having her be repeatedly ignored and tortured for those sympathy points, and then having her be the one to save the show to cap it all off.

I voted for Flower to win, and even if they didn’t set her up like this I still would have. She’s one of the few characters in all of BFDI that actually has a serious degree of character-growth throughout the series, from being the prototypical “mean for the sake of it” character in season 1 to having genuine compassion for those she cares about by the end of BFB. Gelatin doesn’t have any of this, and if I can be candid, I have no clue how he got so far in the season.

BFB 29 is good overall, but let’s not dwell on it any longer. The real meat and potatoes of this part of the rant is going to deal with the final episode, one I have so many thoughts on I have to split it into multiple segments. Let’s talk about BFB 30.

Smaller Thoughts on BFB 30

The scenes with the fake seasons add a lot to Four’s character, and are a nice lead in to the fact that he’s actually a huge BFDI fan who really just wanted to be in that show he really loves. Judging by his actions in the early days of BFB it’s obvious this was a rather late addition to his character, but his cruelty to the objects could likely be interpreted as just a culture difference between Algebraliens and objects. I could make a whole separate analysis about this, but right now I’ll just leave it that these aspects of Four’s character are rather interesting.

This is going to be really nitpicky, but I have no clue why Bubble would want Gelatin to win. He’s been nothing but horrible to her the entirety of Post-Split. Maybe you could say the same for Flower’s behavior towards her both here and in season 1, but in that case have her indecisive over her vote, not overly enthusiastic. This choice makes no sense. (Can you tell that Bubble is one of those characters I care way too much over how they’re written?)

Gotta say, very nice how they have Firey reflecting on his actions without outside prompting here, good sign of character development. Now if only they could have had him say something to this effect eight episodes ago… sigh…

From here the episode splits into two plots that it jumps between repeatedly. Going through every scene in the order they happen would start to get confusing, so I’ve given them their own sections. Gonna be honest, not really a fan of how either of these went. Let’s start with the better of the two.

Flower and the Battle for the BFDI

So, Flower and the Announcer start fighting over who should get the BFDI, and Purple Face comes out of nowhere to steal it for himself. They get in the bus, a bunch of other people give some silly reasons why they should have the BFDI, and then the bus is dangling off a cliff. Everyone hops out except those still fighting over the BFDI: Flower, the Announcer, and Purple Face.

Purple Face does not need to be here.

Flower wants the BFDI because she won, it’s her rightful prize, very valid. Announcer wants the BFDI because it’s his life’s work and, as he reveals here, the only remaining copy of that work, very valid.

Purple Face wants the BFDI just because he thinks he deserves it. His reason for wanting it is just as stupid as all the reasons the other characters (who aren’t Flower or the Announcer) gave for wanting it, and those were all treated as jokes. Hell, Firey (and by extension Leafy) DEFINITELY had a better reason for wanting the damn thing.

Why are we supposed to be taking this seriously? Purple Face has been nothing but a joke character the entire season, and now they suddenly want people to feel bad for him. So much of this scene is dedicated to him over Flower and the Announcer, the two this scene should have been focused on.

Time to get to the much weaker of the two plots.

Gelatin Helps Four Find Out His Value

Okay, I’m about to be way too overly negative, so let’s have something positive for a breather. “Choo Choo! Think again, Balloon Buddy!” is one of the best jokes in the entire series. I will not elaborate.

So, Four starts to run away, and all the characters who didn’t go after Purple Face (except Profily) chase after him. After a bit, they all end up on the sun, and a character gives a speech about how they’re all mad at Four, how he’s hurt them and been mean to them throughout the entire season, and he still expects them to all stick around for him?

Pretty nice speech, I wonder which character gives it?

Maybe Bubble? She’s constantly going under ire and has had to take a lot of shit this season.

Or maybe Flower! Maybe she could reflect on when she was a bad person, and how she turned around to better herself, and try to impart the things she learned onto Four.

Perhaps X! They’re Four’s best friend, and have certainly been hurt by him throughout this season. Maybe he could show Four sympathy for the objects? This is probably the best option, because of how close these characters are.

But no, none of these characters make this speech.

Gelatin makes this speech.

Gelatin.

Motherfucking Gelatin.

MOTHERFUCKING. FORK-FLINGING. PEOPLE-PUSHING. BOMBY-EXPLODING. GELATIN.

Gelatin is the last character who should be giving a speech about how being mean to people is bad. HE IS A GODDAMN MENACE! HAVING HIM SAY THIS MAKES HIM INTO A GIANT HYPOCRITE!

And then they play a montage on the BFB to show how fun this season actually was, and convince Four that they all really do like him. Am I the only one that thinks Four got off a little scot-free for the whole murdering and tormenting his contestants thing?

Whatever, let’s take a look at the supposedly “fun” moments of BFB that they want to give Four credit for:

Flower getting excited for like a second that she didn’t get eliminated, before running off in embarrassment because she tried to celebrate with the contestant who actually did get eliminated

A scene mere moments before Four despawns X again

A bunch of people playing with the popper toys, something that had no involvement from Four and likely would have happened regardless of his presence

A scene mere moments before Leafy painfully burns to death

Gelatin’s fork stack, which definitely didn’t involve Four because it happened before they showed up

The boring-ass train ride from BFB 21

Four’s almost-four-way-tie song, which I guess gets a pass

Aside from the last one maybe, how is ANY of this meant so show how much fun the cast has had with Four? And to top it all off the most unfitting piano music plays over the whole thing. Absolute dumpster fire of a montage.

Ending Thoughts on BFB 30

Everyone gets together to have a party and all is well in the world. Except for those 50000 dead Davids in Davidland. A shame, really. (that was a joke)

Wow, this best friends line sure aged well, didn’t it, Teardrop? (Actually thinking about it now they probably planned for Teardrop to join TPOT by this point. So why include this line when they already knew one of his best friends ditched him?)

This line is really corny. But also kinda charming? Weird. I guess all she really wanted in the end was friends, and now she has them! Good for her.

And you know, if I ignore how much I dislike how Post-Split reconciled Firey and Leafy, this scene is really cute. Very nice note to end on.

For the episode, that is. We still have stuff to talk about here.

So, about BFB 30 as a whole. Do I think it’s a good BFDI episode? Yeah, I guess. I have my problems with it (as I have more than made clear), but it still has a lot of laughs, and things conclude in a halfway decent way. So yeah, it’s a good episode.

But is it a good finale? I don’t think so. This is supposed to be BFB’s last hurrah, its final impact on the viewers. It should be putting its best foot forward here, but it drops the ball on so many things I can’t in good conscience say it was a satisfying conclusion to the season.

I just hope TPOT handles its finale a lot better.

Post-Split as a Whole

Welp, that certainly was a ride. Time for some closing thoughts.

While it might seem like I dislike characters like Gelatin from what I’ve said in this rant, I really don’t. I like these characters in the other seasons they’re in! Post-Split just kinda doesn’t do all that great with them.

Additionally, I don’t hate Post-Split either. I don’t love it, though. It’s just okay. It has some high highs, and some pretty deep lows. It has a lot of little things (and some major ones) that all together keep me from loving it like I do all the other seasons.

I’ve seen some people say the Split was the nail in the coffin for BFB, that there was no way Post-Split could have lived up to what came before. I don’t share this opinion. Episodes like BFB 20 and 26 (and to a lesser extent, 28 and 29, and to an even lesser extent, 22) show to me that Post-Split could have been something special.

So what happened? Why did Post-Split turn out the way it did?

I don’t know. I’m not here to do any meta-analysis or anything.

I’m just here to rant.

And rant I have.

[urfavouritegirlie]

Hi! I don't know if you accept requests or not (it's cool if you don't!) But do you have any hc about Aaron discovering he has a daughter? Lol. And what would be Miles reaction. Okay, thank you. Bye :D

Hi Anon👋, I’m not really taking requests but I had to jump on this one. However I can't promise all future requests being answered quickly because I've got studies to focus on but I will try and do as best as I can. I feel like this request was made based on the headcannon I had made up. Absolutely love love love it and I'm happy to write it. Now let's get on with it shall we.

Oh and btw, He would be a Girl dad right. I can't see it any other way.

"Girl if you don't call this man now, I will track him myself."

"Ok I heard you, I'll call. Just in my own time. I promise I will call."

"Fine. Gotta go now but he's got to know now ok. You can't do this alone."

I mutter under my breath something she can't hear. "Psh yes I can."

Homegirl leaves and I'm stuck here with a phone number struggling to call it. It's been long. Will he even remember me? Why I am scared? I'm a grown woman for goodness sake, just do it.

"Fuck it."

------------------------------------------

Aaron arrives at his place at the early hours of a new day. However he just wants to collapse in bed and forget about yet another near death experience. All gear on the floor only left in boxers and bandages and dried up blood. He escaped gunshots but not the sharp end of the blade. A non life threatening gash on his arm and the side of his abdomen. Chugged a few pills and was ready to get knocked into sleep.

Not even five minutes into sleep, his phone vibrates on his night stand. Great another thing to do. He semi consciously picked the phone and answered without looking at the name id. Not that there was one.

"Hello," he answers. Not a word back. If these scam callers where trying him he was going to find whoever they were and end it there.

He kisses his teeth and no longer wanting to entertain whoever disrupted his not so deep sleep.

"Is this Aaron?" Hearing his name got him into defensive mode but relaxed a bit when it was from a feminine voice.

"Who'er you?"

The woman tells her name and it rings a faint bell in Aarons head. He's heard the name before. Where though?

"Do I know you?"

She seemed a bit hesitant to tell but she spit it out anyway after taking a deep breath. "We've hooked up a few times many months ago."

In his head he's thinking it's another chick wanting to see him again or wanting to move things further by being in a relationship with him. Makes it clear to them from the start that it's not like that at all then blocks them. It boosts his ego a little.

"Look, I thought I had made it clear that it was a two-three time thing then we don't talk anymore. I'm not looking for relationship or sum," he said immediately to clear any confusion.

"What? That's not it. I have something very important to tell you," she says.

Nothing could have prepared him for what she had to say next. She sounded nervous before she took a breath to speak.

"Well...... I ended up pregnant. I gave birth to a healthy baby. I found your number and called to let you know. Listen and listen carefully. If you want nothing to do with the baby, that is fine. I just thought you should know. I didn't say anything while I was pregnant because I was focusing on me and my baby and in case something might have happened. And I didn’t have it in me to get an abortion," she said so clearly and calmly.

He heard right? Oh he heard right. Was he too tired and drugged up to believe it or was this for real. She gives him the time to process the news. Once all her words were digested he asks…

“You sure it’s mine? How do you know it ain’t anyone else’s?” He asks confidently.

She takes some air in quickly as if being accused of whoring around. She wasn’t gonna let that slide.

“You’re that last person I slept with. Even then I wasn’t hoe. Never was, never will be ok. Look we were both careless. We didn’t use condoms but I was on birth control which ultimately proved that it’s not as effective as I thought it would be. I’m giving you the choice to come see the baby or to leave the matter completely.”

She was serious in her tone. So believable. Maybe it was the tiredness causing him not to think straight but…..

“Send me your address.”

------------------------------------------

I could not sit still. Walking back and forth trying to find something to do to distract me. It's still early morning, slight heavy rain falling and sliding from the top to the bottom of the window. The baby was ok, asleep in the bouncer, slowly rocking. I try to sit on the sofa but my leg just keeps bouncing, with the tv on but not my attention on it.

That dreaded call ended about an hour ago and by the sound of his voice, he was serious.

I flinch at the sound of the buzzer. “Hello?”

“It’s Aaron.”

With not many words I buzz him in. Now in a few moments things could go right or left. This is right, right? I gave him options. That's a good thing right? I definitely didn't want to be one of those women who don't let fathers see their child for no reason. Thoughts stop swirling when there is finally a knock on the door. No more time for hesitation but the doorway felt so far.

Aaron POV

I'm soaked from the rain. It took me being inside the apartment complex to realise. All this time it wasn't on my mind that it was pouring outside. There's an elevator but the stairs seem quicker. I skip a step each time until I'm in front of her door. No time to hesitate. I put my fist against the door to knock.

The door opens with her standing behind it. I most definitely remember now. I’ve been with her more times than I’d like to admit honestly. Can’t lie it was the best, not that I’d admit it to her face. Now seeing her, she has a glow that I hadn't seen before.

"Hi"

"Hi umm sorry bout being soaked, its raining like shit outside."

She gives a small laugh and tells me to come in. I remember I've been here before a couple times. Her place always smelt nice and looked clean. I take my jacket off and hang it by the door. I follow her down the short corridor to the living area. We both turn to the living room.

"Well. Here she is."

In the corner of the room, a baby swing with the smallest human possible as cute as can be a sleep, protected from world. I sit on the sofa before my legs give out. She said 'she'. A girl. I have a daughter. I hold my head in my hands. She sits next to me and put a hand on my leg to calm me down.

"I know it's a lot to process. Believe me. I had the same reaction when I found out I was pregnant. All the worries left when I first held her. It was instant love. Sorry I kept it from you."

"Nah I get it. Whats her name?"

"Her name is Tiana."

"Its a beautiful name."

I don't know what came over me but the need to protect her came out of nowhere. Protect her from every evil out there. It's crazy to think she is a part of me. But what about me? It on dawns me that I hold the role of prowler. Am I good enough for her? Am I strong enough to protect her? Am I man enough to be her father. Am I going to end up abandoning her like my father did? All these thoughts consuming me all at once.

"Would you like to hold her?"

I look at her and she has a reassuring smile encouraging me to hold her. "I don't know how."

"Neither did I but I learned."

She stands and walks over to this sleeping angel. She picks her up and walks up to me. I hadn't met Miles until he was a couple months old, so I have no experience in holding a newborn. I sit up and back and open my hands. She's so small. I don't think I've seen something so precious in my life. My hands are almost the same size as her.

"Don't be scared. Here, move your arm to support her neck and then your other hand holds the side."

She helps me hold her comfortably. With all this fuss she moves around waking from her sleep. Shit here it comes. Big brown eyes stare at me with a twinkle in them. We are both strangers to each other but she has to have trust in me and I never would dream of breaking that trust. A grown man like shouldn't be feeling emotional but here I am. She was right. It was love at first sight.

"She's so beautiful."

"I know right. Big eyes, a cute nose and a head full of hair. She got that part from me."

We both break out into a short laugh.

I hesitate to ask the following questing seeing as we are not together. "What's her last name?"

"I put mine and your last name together hyphenated. If you don't mind."

"It's nice."

We spend the rest of the day just talking, actually getting to know each other. She works as a nurse at a hospital, I told her I do engineering which isn't a lie. I use it as a cover up from what I do other times.

"I have a nephew, my older brothers son. His names Miles. He probably would wanna meet Tiana. Is that cool."

"I don't mind, it's cool she has cousin."

We met at a diner, we talked and it seemed like we were both after the same thing. No relationship but a stress relief. Semi strangers with benefits kinda thing. No personal questions and no feelings.

Looking at it now, that might change now that she had birthed my daughter. Speaking of her she starts stirring in my arms and looks like she's about to cry. Her lips quiver and starts crying. It's hasn't even been ten minutes and I've failed.

"She's probably just hungry. Let me feed her."

I slowly had her over to mom. All of a sudden she lifts the side of top and puts a boob in her mouth. This looks private so I look away to the whatever was playing to the tv. She starts laughing at me though.

"What? It's not like you've never seen them before."

True. I can't look at breasts the same. All this time they were just sexual thing to me but its not even like that. It's a personal connection between mother and child. I change the subject. I ask her how old Tiana is and she tells me only four days old.

"So you're fresh out the hospital then? Was it not hard?"

"It was hard. I couldn't drive because I was still sore from giving birth, so my friend drove me back home. She's been such a help these past few days. Cooking and cleaning for me but she does have a job and her own family to take care of."

"Hold on. Don't you only get a few weeks off work before you have to go back."

"Yeah. Around twelve weeks and then I have to go back to work. Some weeks are even unpaid."

"Well that's stupid."

"Tell me about it but hey, I didn't build the system. Here burp her."

She hands her to me then leaves.

"Where you goin. I don't know how to do this."

"Relax I'm just getting her cloth so she doesn't throw up on you"

She can back as fast as she left, put a pink cloth on my shoulder and move her to my shoulder.

"Just pat her back until she burps."

She gets up to leave and looks like she's heading into the kitchen.

"What you bout to do now."

"I'm a bout to cook. You've got her so I have the time to."

"Nah order some food. Get some rest."

Took some time going back and forth but she sat down. Same time as Tiana finally burps. I move to get my wallet and hand it over to her.

"You know you have a lot of faith in a stranger."

"Same stranger that birth our baby."

"Hilarious."

She orders some food. Time goes by and it eventually comes. We ate, talked. Looking outside, I realise time has gone by fast. Looks like it time me to leave. I get to lay her down back to sleep in her swing.

"Looks like I gotta go now."

"Oh umm thanks for stopping by and seeing her. You make a great father you know."

Her words struck me to my heart. I want to be the best dad to her. Better than my father ever was to me and Jeff.

"Come by anytime. Oh here's your card."

"You hold on to that."

I grab my jacket, say my last goodbyes to both of them but man I so don't wanna leave. I might come back tomorrow. I grab my phone and start calling.

"Hello?"

"Jeff. I need to talk to you."

"Talk."

"I have a daughter."

"That poor woman."

"Ay now ain't the time for games. Me and her we cool. Yeah we were irresponsible but I stepped up. Think about it, you're an uncle now."

"I've been an uncle. Rio has siblings that have children."

"On our side stupid. Anyway can I take Miles to see her tomorrow?"

------------------------------------------

*The next day*

Jeff has allowed Miles to come with me to see Tiana. But he doesn't know that. I'm trying to surprise his since he wanna keep asking questions talking bout 'how come I don't have a cousin on your side?'.

"So what spot are we painting today."

"We're not doing that."

"We've been walking for so long. Where are we going?"

"You'll see man, just be a little patient. Don't wanna ruin the surprise."

"Surprise!?"

We arrive at apartment complex. I ring up and I'm let inside. The confused looks on his face makes me just wanna laugh but I can't give it away. We get to the door, knock on it and wait.

"Hi guys, come in."

Miles walks shyly behind me until we turn the living room.

"Miles meet your baby cousin, Tiana."

The look on his face is just priceless. Ain't never seen him so confused. He looks at me then at her mother then at Tiana again.

"You have a daughter. Wait does that make you my auntie?"

"Umm well..."

"Yes it does. See I told you. All those questions bout 'how come I don't have an auntie'. Well you got one now."

"It's nice to meet you Miles. Your uncle has told me a lot about you."

He breaks into a nervous laugh. "Unfortunately I haven't heard about you but it's nice to meet you. So uhh how you guys meet?"

Silence

"That's not important. Here come hold her."

Needless to say besides Miles being so puzzled, he was so happy that he has a little cousin. Since then Miles had come to visit and see her many times after school and during the weekend and has seen her grow. Rio and Jeff came later on with gifts. Rio was beyond excited. Jeff was just as surprised as Miles.

"Your family is really nice, I like them a lot."

"Yeah. I've got a present for you too."

I take her down stair to the parking area. Her eyes could have popped out their sockets. Her mouth open so wide, you'd thing her jaw dislocated. In front of us a white Range.

"Oh my gosh Aaron wha- what's this?"

I dangle the keys infant of her and drop them in her hands.

"People call it a 'push present' if I'm correct. Oh and that card, spend it on our daughter."

"You are spoiling her to the core and she doesn't even know what money is."

"Only the best for my baby girl. Besides I wanna try this mom and dad thing. That's if you want to?"

"We could do that."

A/N - Honestly, I'm not to sure I did a really good job on this one I can't lie. I might have to reread it again like ten times and make tweaks to it. But let me know in the comments.

[delusioncorner]

Gasp, Imposter!

Nightwing x Reader (T)

[Y/n] is a newer Bludhaven-based vigilante who has been steadily gaining the trust of a certain blue and black bird-themed masked hero. after he goes MIA for a week, he returns looking....slightly different.

-

I sit atop a building, listening to my completely-normal-totally-not-altered radio for any reported crime. It's weird resorting back to this odd secretive and secluded way of patroling but ever since Nightwing up and disappeared last Monday, I have no choice. He was slowly becoming my patrolling partner as much as he swore up and down that he "didn't want me around" and how I was "such a nuisance seriously go bother someone else" but he's a real softy under that dumb spandex exterior. He even gave me a special in-ear a couple of weeks ago just so he could talk to me, even if we were only several blocks away, checking in to make sure I was fairing well and even calling me if he needed help. He's gone though. Where? I don't know but god, hopefully he's okay.

A crackling through the radio snaps me out of my Nightwing-centered trance. I turn it up a little so I can hear the voices better.

...I have reports of a 211 on Red Line South. Backup requested immediately.

The dispatcher sounds a little worried. Maybe a bit too worried for a supposed robbery in progress. Jumping to my feet, I decided that the edge in her voice is enough of a reason for me to go check that out. I shake the nerves off for what feels like the 80th time that week and remind myself that this is not my first rodeo and it will not be the last. I do some stretching, sharing away any nerves. Welcoming that familiar light buzz that fills me every time I know I'm gonna kick some ass and help someone in this shitty town. I take a final deep breath. And I jump. Grappling from building to building. Flying and dipping through the air. As I soar through the sky I can't help but let out a cry of excitement and anticipation. I love this part of my night.

It's when I'm about halfway to Red Line that I see him. Nightwing, just a few buildings over running and jumping in the same direction as me. Does he see me? Does he know I've been worried sick about him for days? Unable to sleep because I had no idea what had happened to him? I go to yell his name but he plummets into an alley before my mouth gets a chance to form the "n". Landing on a fire escape, I wonder if I should go find him and tell him how sick I've been. How I've missed his stupid voice.

"Put the weapon away now!" A loud booming voice shouts, shaking me to my core. He sounds rough and gritty and one would think he was the criminal in question with a dangerous voice like that. Looking down I see Nightwing with his escrima sticks wielded and realize that I was once again a victim to my own thought and while I was pining over him he managed to sprint 2 blocks over to where I am now. I make a move to jump down but that's when I notice something really interesting. He's grown at least like 4 inches? Right? I mean he is looming over that robber- who, upon further examination, did in fact shoot that cop that was on the scene- but the robber couldn't be any taller than me....

I stay at my place on the fire escape and watch as this Nightwing skillfully disarms the menace while causing minimal damage to the man whose name is Doug because of course, returns the bag to the woman who was cowering around the corner, and checks on and stays with the cop lying on the side of the alley until his backup finally shows up 45 minutes later. The whole time I'm watching this I'm taking mental notes. His mannerisms are much stiffer and strict, he's not making his signature quips, and he definitely didn't do some sort of dumb flip while he was fighting that man which he almost always seems to do. When the backup arrives I make my escape to the top of the building. I had nothing to do with that altercation- even though I siked myself up and prepared for the fight of a lifetime with Doug the burglar- so there's really no reason for me to deal with any sort of cops tonight. I sit on the roof thinking about all the differences I spotted while observing Nightwing tonight and I decide that there's 100% something going on with him. Maybe he's ill? No, that can't be it he would've just stayed home, no? Well then maybe he's decided to turn a newer, more serious leaf? Noooo I don't think that's it either he really loves sassily fighting crime. Maybe he's brainwashed? But then why would he still be actively saving people? Wouldn't the brainwashers want him to go underground or something? I really don't think they'd-

"Who are you and why were you watching me?" The man parading as Nightwing snarls. God damn you, brain. I turn around to look for him. I don't see him at first But I know he's up here somewhere. That's when I saw him. A figure in the shadow. Hes big. Bigger than Nightwing that's for sure. Even though he's standing several feet away you can tell that this man is built like a brick house.

"Who are you and why are you pretending to be Nightwing?"

He's silent. Then he says, "I asked you first."

"Yeah okay, that's really mature. I'm Vulpine. You're impersonating my friend and I want to know why. Now you," I tilt my head up to show him I'm not fucking around.

"I'm a friend of Nightwing's. He's going to be out of town for a while but he wanted me to come here and make sure the city is doing fine." The man says this in a curt tone that makes it clear that he isn't going to answer any more questions I ask.

Tsk.

"And you had to dress like him?" Even though I can't see his face I just know he's staring at me.

"I had to make sure I didn't raise any eyebrows." He is very rapidly getting tired of me already. It makes me giddy.

"Hate to break it to you, dude, but little 5-foot-8-biult-like-a-dancer Nightwing is now.... what are you like 6 feet tall? He's somehow grown 4 whole inches in the past week and he's magically built like a freight train? Yeah fucking right. It would've been better if you just showed up in whatever you wear normally. Something akin to a bat, mayhaps?"

"You can't just say 'mayhaps'-"

"I can."

"No. You can't. Listen, I don't know what you know but it's clearly too much. I will be having a discussion with Nightwing about this as soon as possible. If I find out you were lying for even a second, I will find you." He steps out of the shadow he is under to deliver that last line. He's dramatic. I like him.

"Yeah, alright. When you talk to him tell him I miss him. Okay?" I give "Nightwing" a lopsided smile and decide that maybe tonight is not a patrol night. I salute the man and turn, jumping from the roof and grappling away. As I swing toward my house I can only hope that Batman- because that was clearly Batman- relays my message to the real Nightwing.

-

My first fic on here omg! This was loosely based on the newest edition of the Nightwing comic where Bruce dresses up as Nightwing and watches over Bludhaven for him. I thought It would be funny to write because clearly Bruce is built very differently from Dick and I just think it would be SOOOO obvious to others that it wasn't their typical Nightwing. It's not technically a Nightwing/ Reader fic buuuutttttttt it's like implied maybe. Like if you squint there's a small bit of chemistry and a lot of pining. Maybe I'll make another part.

[feuqueerfire]

A Shop for Killers Live Blogging

I almost started watching My Stand-In (8 eps out) but am feeling a pull for this instead. I knew this had Lee Dong Wook when I came across it but forgot until right now when looking at the poster again haha. I'm hoping it's fun and action-packed and interesting.

Ep 1 (June 18)

that was pretty interesting intro, some guy trying to kill Jian and the woman in the house seems a danger too and maybe also the other guy who was lying down

They don't write Jian's full name in the subs even though the characters are clearly saying Jung Jian

머더헬프 = Murder Help? Mother Help? the translations say "murthehelp" but what?

so is the intro going to come up later? I don't think it said anything about "_ ago" or "_ later" when this scene started...

he's dead?! well i'd like to see his body to make sure it's not a fakeout

1 year ago

Her uncle is 1) expecting some sort of attack and preparing for it and 2) terrorizing people who wrong them/Jian

the last thing he said to her was her student number? but that was a 1 year ago, they haven't had any contact since then or what

ayo what the hell, we're getting to see the body? and it's actually him, not some other guy to pretend he died?

Is the synopsis that the uncle dies? idk why I thought her parents died, so she started living with her uncle

what does the tattoo say

oh lmfao it says murthehelp, I suppose the episode title was correct indeed

Does Bae Jeongmin know anything? or involved in any way? he's offering to clean the bathroom where Jinman died and he could be just being nice or hiding something

Comrade Lee Yonghan - name to remember?

Jeongmin found a (burner?) phone hm

drama at the funeral

Jinman was helping out everybody with money troubles in secret?

lived together for 10 years? so 1 year ago, did she move out?

aw, Jian breaking down alone at home

gun selling website behind the hose business

how many ppl are on her ass bruh

Ep 2 (June 18)

jinman's name 3 times to the sky

bro wtf did Jinman do for everybody to be hating him or seeking revenge or somethingggg? Did his enemies kill his mother and come to kill his brother and SIL?

the same burner phone a decade ago

[Linguistics] They keep using 금방, which I didn't know meant soon but that's fun. it's the syllables switched of 방금, which means just now/a moment ago. short time in the future vs past.

this guy who knows the password reminds me a bit of Wi Hajoon for some reason. I should watch a show with him soon

I've had recurring nightmares as a child and pre-teen about home invasions and such people coming to our house and having to escape like this. so proud of little Jian for escaping

who did the car hit? Jian? why'd it seem like a grown man running towards the house though, it wouldn't be Jinman, right?

this is so fucked up man, her escaping the hospital room and having to hide in the morgue in a little space beside her mother's corpse and she didn't even fully know that the parents are dead

why is he so mean to her lakjdf let's kill him, especially cuz he's the reason her parents and grandma are dead anyway

can't go one korean show without some terrible bully children

fuckkk this bringing her back to that day and getting mad that he came so late despite saying he'd be right back and finally speaking again

hm, the woman with the bob left but she's gonna be back to get caught in the fire with her and Jeongmin later

Ah, a shop for killers; he has a shop where killers can buy

is Jian Code Green?

well, they killed him and are now coming for her, so much for code green

What's up with all this? They banded together to kill Jinman, I'm assuming? And now that he's dead, they're getting rid of their codes (literally in their bodies), and going to kill his niece? Why?

Ep 3 (June 18)

damn, he's on some drugs. and he's faking it to see what Jian would do or something I guess? what are the chances he's doing it again right now by faking his death?

What was that? Does Jeongmin also have a code thing in him? or ig not since it said Error

oh, is the woman actually here to help/protect Jian? I'd noticed that she wasn't with all the men who were planning on killing Jian at the end of last ep

does this woman speak Korean with an accent?

So we aren't counting bullets with the little pistol ig

close the workshed door at least

Brother... also a helper?

Ep 4 (June 19)

damn

name to remember: Bale

oh, is that "Brother" guy the same guy? I couldn't see his face

oh, that's Pasin

Is Pasin also dead, hope not

yesss Jian Muay Thai expert

pls the karaoke guy always singing at the restaurant while watching TV -> singing on TV is so fun

The Minsook girl seems like she could do so much better than hanging out with those bully, cowardly boys (i think it's funny that she stole Jinman's watch but after getting stared down, returned it and apologized). i hope she'll show up again

Damn, Pasin ran off with people's money?

D: these cameras

Brother's working with Mihye

Oh, Jeongmin suddenly becoming bolder/harsher and stopping Brother guy from speaking... just as he's about to give more info...

Brother says to not trust Jeongmin... but Jeongmin doesn't trust Brother... I don't trust either fully

Brother says Jinman's died because of Jeongmin but he doesn't know how

Brother and Jeongmin at each other's throats and Jian's guy pointed at Jeongmin. who to trust?

why would clicking on 0404 kill them... Jeongmin...

Weapon shopping mall

Mihye does know Brother, though I assume she met him as a child

...choosing Jeongmin?

ah, I did wonder for a second whether at least Jinman wouldn't think that Jeongmin had locker her in because how would Jeongmin know where she was even at night + not go get anybody?

well, Jeongmin turning out to not be good isn't a surprise, especially the way he started behaving once Brother was here but from when I suspected him at the start + started suspecting him again in the middle of this episode, they were good at making me go like hm, perhaps he's not evil

good parallel with Jinman being like you must be responsible for your choices and Jian's decision to keep it meant she witnessed the cat's death and also her decision to trust Jeongmin over Brother resulted in her current predicament.

Jian was dumb to trust Jeongmin but people are seriously being too mean and flippant about her in the reddit on-air thread, makes me frown.

Ep 5 (June 19)

a manual labour part-time job, not website-making

he's not working on his own obviously, he's got some other people he answers to. seems like the big draw is money?

oh yeah, I'd wondered if he had somehow known about the site already when he was first "finding" it with Jian but it was a passing thought

hmmm these people who recruited Jeongmin basically, are they the ones who killed Jian's parents and grandma? And are they ones who were at Jinnam's funeral? Because those people didn't seem to be the weapons buyers who were trying to kill Jian

Damn, the other guy really just got shot in the head

I guess Jeongmin's actor cute baby face helps sell this sort of role because I think they said he was a killer in Blind or something too

cameras everywhere, including seeing Jeongmin mess around

so those people want access to murthehelp?

Naur, how could Jinman fall for a fake recording of Jian? I don't even know if she'd call for help from this like that... wouldn't it be Jeong Jinman x3? Maybe he's playing bc girl what. I think he'd at least just call her phone straight up just to see

damn that's wild, he just believed that 5 second recording and killed himself while believing that the people who supposedly kidnapped his niece would let her go if he dies? doubt it. i think he's still alive or Something bc wtf

right, so the show also knows that's way too easy...

btw where are Mihye and Brother?

oh lmfao they just left her there to fend for herself

oh yeah, I was wondering what he'd done secretly when he remodeled the house

hm, so Babylon also came? and the two teams are working together now or what?

hilarious "[the killer robot dog] is gonna steal our jobs later, you know"

this fight/shooting scene is so video game-y to me

why didn't Brother get the gun from the hallway and sneak up on the guy or something? good thing Pisan got here at the perfect time ig

We found out stuff behind Jinman's death and who's behind it but I still found this ep boring somehow...

Ep 6 (June 20)

ngl I wanna just finish this show and be done with it today so maybe I'll watch at 1.25x (I did that for the second half of ep 5 last night) unless I start Really liking it and wanna savour it

So seems like backstory is: Jinnam was doing stuff and killing people or whatever in a big team, which included Bale. Then 14 years ago he saw Bale kill a child in cold-blood because "there can't be witnesses." The killers here all seem trained and capable. He probably leaves/runs away and that's why he finally goes to his family but Bale and the people are all chasing him and killing his family and want to kill him. because of him as a witness or some other reason? I think 13 years ago Jian was living with Jinman so it makes sense ig

oh, so they were mercenaries and the mission was to take that guy to safety but Bale killed civilians.

damn, Jinman lied on the stand for Bale

Bale is scary af

Enough scantily clad women in vulnerable positions i feel ill and upset every time

is this Mihye?

ah, Bale literally saying that he'd kill all of Jinman's family and friends if he's still alive

he said he'd take out Jinman last... but Jian is still left... idk I'm just looking for clues that he's still alive somehow lmfao

ah, no more bullets to properly take out Bale but they assumed he was dead

Who is the person who's supposed to be tailing Jinman?

Bale didn't give Jinman time to Breathe, mans went back to his family and Immediately they started dropping like flies

I liked this ep, action, backstory, and answers. and also perhaps a more engaging story or maybe just the sort of story i'm more in the mood for rather than the other episodes.

Also, Lee Dongwook looked good whenever he had his hair down like toward the end of the ep when he's out of uniform and has the bandaid on his face.

Ep 7 (June 20)

is the guy who Mihye's staying with the same guy who went to save Jian but then got killed + his arm chopped off?

ohh, it must be him because I'm remembering that he also typed the answer on the phone to show Jian, right? and he uses sign language here too. though is he the one who called Jinman when his brother died? probably not

ohhh these fuckers orchestrated that murder-suicide story for Jian's parents

wait the deaf friend who I've been thinking has a nice face is named Honda here and he was also the main character in The Director Buys Me Dinner?!

so even the guy who gave the warning actually did it so that Jinman would leave and be ambushed

oh yeah, I'd wondered if the car broken down lady was actually part of the plan and seems like yeah

so not just Bale's conspiracy but entire Babylon wants Jinman dead because he lied about what happened and how Bale "died"

He needs a long-term plan... and that's why he's either not dead or died knowing exactly what was going to happen after

Aw, Pasin, Mihye, Brother, Jian all in that house

I'm liking the backstory episdoes. I liked the backstory in earlier episodes of young Jian when people were dying and how her and Jinman interacted but then I got bored of the backstories in the middle of when she was a teenager because it felt like we weren't getting scenes that needed half the episode to itself but these two episodes were interesting to see why everything was happening and the story just interested me more. Interesting use of flashbacks though because in the earlier eps, we were doing 50-50 flashbacks and current time, both in Jian's POV but now we've done 100% flashbacks in Jinman's POV.

Last ep, 1 hour left, we'll see how they wrap it up.

Ep 8 (June 20)

parallels with her hiding in her room while this fucker's out to get her

oof, Brother dead

It's really not fun to have everybody fighting and dying while Jian just stands and watches in horror even while everybody's telling her to run, thus also distracting them. either help or escape bruh

okay I defended Jian from people calling her stupid in like the ep 4 reactions or whatever but she's so frustrating now. i get she Wants To Know What Happened but just giving away her position and trying to talk to this guy is so... like he literally has a gun

dying, the way the guy was talking about and to Jeongmin before and after killing him was really funny

oh lol Brother was wearing a bulletproof vest. but on that note, what about Mihye? and also I can't believe it's seeming more and more like Jinman truly just offed himself over a fake recording like actually wtf, like he actually would not do that he can't be so stupid

okay she did it, clean bullet through the head, good job Jian

ah, so every killer came to kill them all because Babylon was offering bounty for their deaths. but what about Bale? or is he just fine w Jinman dead or thought dead or whatever

so funny, they're all like yaaas tax-free prize + sales on weaponry

thought the bus would have Jinman lol

okay, duh. ofc he's alive duh and comes right after Jian has managed to escape/survive/etc.

Kind of anticlimactic but tracks with what we've seen in the earlier eps I guess. Also, no Bale? Some people on the on-air thread said we're supposed to assume that maybe Jinman was fighting with Bale and that's why he's weak and bruised? idk.

Overall:

Interesting premise + interesting execution with all the flashbacks, especially because it was like eps 1 - 4: about half is flashbacks to Jian's childhood/growning up with Jinman/teenagehood in her POV, ep 5: Jeongmin's POV flashback for about half, eps 6 - 7: almost entirely Jinman POV flashbacks, ep 8: almost no flashbacks. I think I liked some of the early Jian's POV eps (ep 2 comes to mind) and quite enjoyed eps 6 - 7 which gave us more backstory. I do have to say the flashbacks cutting through the current action was sometimes bothersome, especially after we'd established important stuff in the first few eps and were showing stuff in the middle episodes that didn't need as much screentime, specifically Jian's teenage life. I thought ep 5 was also weak af.

I found Jinman intriguing and mysterious and understood him despite being frustrated with how he treated Jian at times. Jian I liked way more at the beginning but then started being kind of annoyed toward the end at times. Mihye was soooo cool.

It was a surprisingly funny show, especially in regard to how this is just a job for these mercenaries and killers lol

The ending was a bit anticlimactic in terms of how things were resolved + there was a bunch of important threads that were unfinished (aiming for a season 2?). I wasn't surprised by the ending but I don't know if they were aiming for that anyway, I think they knew the audience to predict it and were okay with it.

idk what to rate it, like it's fine, I liked it well enough, likely will never think about it again, but may watch season 2 if it ever airs. I guess I liked it more than Killed Paradox (I actually barely remember that show, esp the second half? nothing in my brain)

Rating: 6.5/10

[bergeronprocess]

The men of Wylde Flowers power rankings

Keep in mind I'm still in spring, so I might learn more things about these guys that moves them up or down later. But for now:

1. ANGUS. Omg I wish romancing him was an option (Francis is very sweet though). He's perfect. He's a baker, he makes puns, he's part Scottish. Sigh...

2. Thomas. When my friend told me there's no romance route for him, I was mad as hell. He would just be perfect to like soften up over time and fall for. Dreamy. We could talk shit about Marty.

3. Damon. The game is trying to put us together lol we had one conversation where Lina was ragging him for being single and I chose the answer that was like "Aw Lina, let him be" and that conversation eventually led to like "Maybe we can go out sometime?" But nothing further yet. He just seems like a good guy overall.

4. Kai. All those surfing injury stories are gnarly but he does have cool stuff in his shop.

5. Francis. Nice guy, very cosmopolitan, talented at his job. Please go to sleep sometimes, Francis. Maybe I can make you a sleeping potion. Please sleep.

6. Parker. Just seems like a friendly fella. He has that good spatial reasoning - he has to for his job - and I like that. Has his hands full with the twins. He just had me get him some tulips for his anniversary and that was really sweet.

7. Bruno. The fact that his stand is called Soft and Son's but Otto doesn't want anything to do with it is so sad. Okay so maybe he has a drinking problem but nobody's perfect.

8. Shelby. I'm not put off by the "weird guy living in the woods" thing and he has some smart stuff to say. He alluded to some of his relatives having been killed in the Holocaust and that broke my heart.

9. Getting hit by a bus

10. Cameron. I'm from the south. I've seen lots of these charismatic smooth-talking religious hucksters. I don't trust Cameron one dang bit.

11. Otto. Totally fake ass politician trying to get the votes from an electorate of, what, twelve? I don't trust him either. Trying to spread all that "be afraid of your neighbors" Nextdoor crap. I just know he's gonna try to go all Crucible on the coven if he finds out anyone's identities. (I am trying to be friendly to Vanessa though - she told me the story of her friend Amy and I just felt sad for her.)

12. Marty. This man is the feds or something. We've had like 3 interactions and every one has me going 🤨. The fact he was clearly lying about his last name and almost tripped on it. The weird hesitation to tell me he used to be a consultant. Calling me a "girl farmer" like sir I am a grown woman. When I first learned that a rancher was coming, I thought oh nice maybe another romantic prospect. But even if a romance route was available for this guy, I would absolutely not take it.

Maybe next time I play through, I should pick "Claire" when Hazel asks me about my former fiance's name and then pursue Amira because she was coming on HARD to me 😳

I should power rank the women later too lol

[marstonandson]

Tearful Reunions

read on Ao3

words: 2183

Now that he's on his own, Jack stumbles across two people from his parents' past and gets a little comfort along the way.

--

Chapter 1: Mrs. Adler

Jack glanced up at the saloon, one he’d never been to before, wondering if this was even a good idea. It was possible she wouldn’t even remember him. The last time they saw each other, he was just a boy, but his few memories of her were good ones. She’d always been good to him, even from the beginning.

Taking a deep breath, he pushed open the saloon doors and strode up to the bar, surveying the place while he waited for the bartender. “Hey there, friend. Whiskey, if you could.” The man nodded and poured out a drink, sliding the glass toward his outstretched hand. Without any reservation, Jack downed it, barely making a face, and met the bartender’s eyes. “I was told I could find someone at this here saloon.”

In turn, the bartender narrowed his eyes. “Depends. If you got the proper motivation I may be able to help you.”

Without blinking, Jack reached into his pocket and slammed ten dollars onto the counter. “Do you know a woman named Sadie Adler? I was told she frequents this place.”

The bartender’s gaze slid down toward the money, where he carefully picked it up to leaf through it. Without looking back up, he nodded. “Comes in here to play poker from time to time. Should be in the back. She’s a scary one though, mister, I suggest you find someone else if you’re looking for company in bed.”

“Thanks.” Jack knew better than to argue about the situation, pushing off of the bar to walk past the drunken fools around him and toward the door the man had indicated. As he approached, he could hear voices.

“I fold.”

“Aha! I told ya, Thompson, you ain’t gonna get a cent outta me!”

“Of course not. You’re just a cheatin’ whore!” A chair scraped against the ground.

“I know you are, so what am I? See you next week when you’re ready to give me more money!” The door swung open and a middle-aged man stormed out, bumping Jack’s shoulder hard. Another man inside sighed.

“Oh, give it a rest, Adler. One day it’ll be your brains on the wall.”

“As if he could even move fast enough to shoot an armadillo stuck in mud. If it’s a duel he wants, it’s a duel he’ll get, but he ain’t walkin’ away from it.”

Jack breathed in, trying not to look as nervous as he felt, and pushed the door open. In the poker room sat a man and a woman. The woman had her feet up on the table, dozens of poker chips around her. Her blonde hair was streaked with gray, cut about shoulder length and adorned with a white hat. She glanced up as the door opened, and the smile faded from her face as she pulled her feet off the table.

“John?” she asked, nearly breathless. “I heard…I thought you was dead!”

For what felt like the thousandth time, Jack’s heart shattered. God, he really looked like his father, didn’t he? “I’m…I’m afraid he is dead, ma’am.”

“You know this feller, Adler?” The man beside her asked, looking between the two like it was a game.

Sadie’s face twisted from shock, to confusion, to recognition. She blinked once, then twice, then suddenly got to her feet, the chair scraping loudly against the wood. “Jack?”

His eyes pricked, but he blinked and smiled to hide it. “Yeah. ‘M all grown now.”

“That you is! You son of a bitch, c’mere!” She rushed forward, hugging him less than gracefully, and as relief coursed through his veins, he returned it. “You was just a boy last time I saw you! Now look how big you’ve gotten!” Sadie pulled away after a moment, inspecting him closer, her eyes taking in every detail of his new look. “I’m so glad to see you. How the hell are you?”

“I’m fine,” he replied, for a moment a little uncomfortable about the coddling when there was a stranger in the room. On the other hand, she reminded him of his mother, and he took comfort in that.

Sadie looked at him like she knew his answer was a lie, then gestured to the table. “C’mon, take a seat. And Mr. Martin, get out of here.”

“But -”

“I said get out.”

The man looked at Jack, then Sadie, then sighed, grabbing his hat. He sent Jack one last look before leaving the room, closing the door behind him. She grinned at Jack, gesturing toward the table again, and they each took a seat.

Sadie leaned her elbows on her knees, watching him like she was looking at a dead man. He supposed, in a way, she was. He was John’s legacy.

“How’s your Ma?”

Jack knew this question would be coming, but it still hurt as if a train had collided with his chest. “...I buried her last month.”

“Oh, no…” she murmured, her eyes darkening as she looked down at the ground. After a few seconds, she reached forward, placing a hand on his knee. “I’m so sorry, Jack.”

He closed his eyes for a moment, remembering how frail Abigail had become after John’s death, how her health had just been deteriorating for years on end until it finally claimed her life. He hoped, wherever they were now, they were together.

“I heard you was in Armadillo, Mrs. Adler,” he said, opening his eyes to change the subject. “Wasn’t even sure if you’d remember me, but I figured I’d stop by for old times’ sake.”

Sadie’s brows shot up. “Not remember you? The Marstons’ boy? How could I not remember you, Jack? You was always a little firecracker. I liked you. Never hesitated to give your old man some of that backtalk.”

Jack found himself smiling a little. “I’ll never forget those sweets you snuck me before dinnertime. Ma just about killed us.”

She lit up. “Thankfully we could use Uncle as a scapegoat, the old dog.” Jack hadn’t heard his name in a while, either. His chest twisted painfully again. She seemed to notice, and got to her feet. “Stay here, partner. I’m gonna get us some drinks, on me.”

“You don’t have to -”

“‘Course I do. You’re family.” She smiled, then left the poker room, leaving him alone with his thoughts.

Glancing up at the ceiling, Jack let out a long sigh and slowly reached for his father’s hat, taking it off to place on the table. His gaze wandered to the bookshelf in the corner, and he wondered if he ought to start writing that book he always joked he would write. Would that make John proud? Or would this, this life he was living now, make him proud?

For as long as he could remember, he’d wanted to be like John. And John always fought against it. Now, he supposed, he knew why.

The door swung open and Sadie returned with three glasses. She slid two of them toward him, smiling kindly. “Looks like you needed the extra.”

He didn’t even have the energy to thank her, and instead wordlessly picked up one of the glasses. Swirling the liquid around for a moment, he furrowed his brows. “You…lost your husband a long time ago, didn’t you, Mrs. Adler?”

Her eyes softened. “Yes, I did. It’s how I ended up joinin’ the gang. And jeez, Jack, call me Sadie already.”

“Sorry.” He watched the alcohol ripple in its glass. “After Pa died, I was so focused on takin’ care of Ma like he always told me to and…and now that she’s gone, I…” As his eyes began to burn, he brought the glass to his lips, trying to focus on the burn in his throat instead. He took a deep breath. “I found him, Sadie. Found the man who killed my father, and I killed him. I thought it would make things easier, but it ain’t. Nothin’s easy.”

Sadie was quiet for a moment, then scooted her chair a little closer. “No, it ain’t easy,” she said, the gentlest he’d ever heard her be, “It ain’t easy ‘cause you’re your pa’s kid. Y’know he did the same thing.”

“What?”

“Him, and me, and Charles, we all went after the feller who killed your Uncle Arthur,” she explained, leaning back in her seat. “I always heard the folk in camp talk about Dutch’s philosophy, or whatever it was. ‘Revenge is a fool’s game’, they’d say. But revenge kept us all goin’. It’s the only reason we survived this long. I killed the man who killed my Jakey, and I don’t regret it one bit.”

Jack looked down at his lap, placing the glass down and squeezing his gloved hands into tight fists. “It felt good,” he admitted, remembering the surprised look on Ross’ face before he fell to the ground. “Real good. But since then, nothin’s made any sense. Nothin’s fair. I…I miss ‘em both so much.”

“It’s a cruel world we live in, Jack Marston,” she agreed. “The pain gets easier to bear, but it also sometimes hits ya out of nowhere like a group of bandits. Someday, you’ll find a nice lady, settle down like they always wanted you to. You’re still young. You’ll be fine.”

“It don’t feel fine,” he choked, wondering why he was even saying all of this. Hot tears spilled over and began falling down onto his lap. The sound of a scraping chair filled his ears as Sadie came closer. His head soon rested against her chest, a gentle hand running through his hair. He cried harder, knowing he hadn’t been treated this kindly in months, making him miss his mother more than ever.

Sadie held him for a while, not saying anything, just letting him cry. Eventually, as it slowed, she sighed softly. “I never got around to havin’ children,” she said, “and it ain’t my place to say, but I’m proud of you, Jack. Real proud. You’ve grown into a fine man.”

Carefully, Jack sat up, wiping away at his face. “...Thank you.” He didn’t feel like one, but he appreciated the sentiment nonetheless. “I-I’m sorry. I didn’t think our reunion was gonna go like this.”

“Nonsense, don’t apologize. I just have that charmin’, put-you-at-ease effect on people.”

He smiled slightly. “I think my Pa would disagree with that.”

“And I’d kick his ass for it,” she replied, returning the smile. “Where you been stayin’?”

“Camping around, mostly,” he admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. “Since Ma died, I…can’t bring myself to stay at Beecher’s Hope.”

Sadie nodded, getting to her feet. “I didn’t have that problem. Micah burned my fuckin’ house down,” she sighed, offering a hand. “C’mon, my house ain’t far. Just for a night, let’s get a roof over your head.”

Jack blinked. “You sure?”

“Sure, I’m sure. Your parents were friends of mine, Jack, so you’re a friend of mine, too. C’mon now.”

Forcing air into his lungs, he nodded, reaching forward to take the last glass and down it. Then he took Sadie’s hand to let her pull him up. Together, they headed outside, mounted their horses, and he followed her to a small cabin a little outside of town. It was everything one person could need; a small kitchen, a single bed, a bathtub. 

“When’s the last time you got any sleep?” she asked, which completely caught him off guard.

“Um…few days, maybe,” he admitted. Sleep was harder than it had ever been in his life before. He’d be lying if he said the fatigue wasn’t getting to him; his whole body felt heavy.

Sadie gave him a knowing smile, like she had once gone through the same thing. “Lie down then, partner.”

“Oh, n-no, no, this is your bed. I can’t possibly -”

“It’s an order. In you get, before I cut off that pretty hair of yours.”

Jack gulped. No wonder his father always seemed to follow Sadie’s lead instead of the other way around. Carefully, he sat on the edge of the bed, then moved to lay down, breathing in the smell of smoke and whiskey. Sadie sat beside him, shaking her head slightly.

“Do you still read them storybooks you used to love?”

“Sometimes.” His body felt heavier by the minute.

“Last time we saw each other, you were readin’ one about…uh…flyin’ monkeys or some such…”

Jack smiled, his eyelids fluttering closed. “Wizard of Oz.”

“Yeah! The man behind the curtain. Callin’ himself a wizard is mighty high self-praise though, I’ll tell you that. And I’d be surprised if a scarecrow could walk around without a brain, but plenty of fellers do that every day…”

While she spoke, for a moment, he was on the couch at home, with Abigail in the armchair and John by the fire. He was safe. He was happy. He was young.

He was happy to have that, for just that moment, before sleep whisked him away.

[mew-cake]

I'd like to see you rewrite Magical Destroyers if you hate it so much.

This sounds like a sarcastic "well I'd like to see YOU do better" sort of comment but for the sake of creative exorcise I'll take it seriously.

It's hard to "rewrite" this series while still respecting it. Especially since it was a passion project from Jun Inagawa. He incorporated a lot of his personal experiences and feelings into the story and that's something I don't want to take away from. So for the most part, I'll only be adding ideas and themes to it.

Primarily, women. Add women. The whole story is an analysis of otaku fandom and culture, and women have been a huge part of that from the beginning. Even if socially, it's a male dominated space, women are still a part of that. So in this hyper stylized exaggerated world, explore what it's like to be a women in those spaces. The way shoujo series tend to be dismissed, the way women are sometimes "tested" to see if they're a "true fan", and the unwanted attention sometimes given just by existing as a woman within a mostly male fandom space.

The magical girls need to actually be given their own character arcs. I'll be honest half the time it didn't even feel like they liked each other. So make them actual friends, have actual relationships between one another, and don't make their entire involvement in the plot center around Otaku Hero lordy be. He can still be important to them (I would argue he should be more of a father figure to them), but he shouldn't be the ONLY thing important to them. They can still originate from Origin and whatever, but they have to be their own people.

In terms of specifics, take out the weird stuff in episode 4 about the kids. Because in that situation, the dads were objectively in the wrong. And especially don't imply that a crowd of grown men are aroused by an elementary school boy. Don't do that. Ever.

And if weird anime tropes ARE employed, SAY SOMETHING ABOUT IT. Don't just have the trope, say "this is a trope!" and move on. Explore why that's a thing. Let other characters express how it makes them feel. There was a brief moment in episode 2 when Pink mentioned how she doesn't like all the otaku staring at her, which was an interesting point that never gets explored!

Oh yeah! There was the "elite 4" type characters? Who barely made any presence in the show at all. Do something more with that. Honestly with Himawari and her brother, I thought they were gonna say something about how her brother forced his sister into indulging his weird fantasies, and she was conflicted because she didn't want to do that stuff, but she also loved her brother. But then they didn't. She was just mad that she wasn't killed by her brother too in a weird way?? I don't know. Anyway, explore that.

I have other ideas, but these are the basic concepts I would add. It's mostly me adding in MY own experience as an anime fan and how I feel about the culture and fanbase. Of course, all of this is a generalization. And writing out a plot summery is much different then actually writing a 13 episode TV show. I am not saying my version is better. This is simply my personal preference.

None of this is discounting what the actual anime does well, because there are good parts about it. But since you asked, this is what I would change.

[buginateacup]

9, 14, 18, 37 for the ask meme!

ooh Dal I hope you're ready for this...

Which fic has been the hardest to write?

Tea with Topsy. Hands down. I have others I struggled with for longer, but Topsy had a schedule and I would spend hours just trying to think through the hows and whys and who's doing whats of that fic so I could keep it straight in my head (unlike Megamind and Roxanne, wahey!) while trying to post regularly and not fuck myself by having something happen and accidentally cut a chunk of story because of it.

What’s the worst writing advice you’ve ever come across?

Cut everything that doesn't advance the plot.

Seriously WHY would you say that? Maybe this is because I'm primarily a fanfic writer but what the fuck? Half the time the plot is the LEAST interesting thing about a story! Because here's the secret. Unless your characters are on a QUEST, they don't know there is a plot. They are just trying to live their lives and thinking about what comes in two days, two weeks, two months. When the plot arrives it is a Disruption! And if you don't let your characters react or crash and burn or give them enough time to actually show WHY they are people who make bad or selfish or pointless decisions, you wind up with a very boring story or characters acting OOC just to move the plot along and I swear this is where half the "If I was X character I would simply not make X decision" comments. You need to give your story time to BREATHE.

Your characters do not know they are in a story. They are not going to think like a reader and as a writer you need to give them follow through so they are not little puppets getting pushed around a stage. It's like punching someone, you don't aim for their nose, you aim two inches past it.

Do you use any tools, like worksheets or outlines?

I use dot points. Usually when I realise I've written myself into a corner and have to figure out how to get out again. I have also been known to rough draft plot points a la gossip style story telling (hi Rings!) but that happens less than you'd think. I am not good at planning, but I like making sure I set something up before I knock it down so my brain and I mostly agree to disagree.

Talk about your current wips.

I...all of them? Ohhkay oh fuck alright I can do this. There are six open on my laptop right now. I'm gonna start with them.

Lindworm: You know the story of the lindworm? Woman wants a baby, fucks up the instructions, has a perfect child and also a dragon. And oops they're all grown up now and dragon wants a bride? (Or possibly a snack. He's kind of into eating people). But the bride wears numerous dresses and convinces the lindworm he can eat her if he takes off a skin for each dress she removes and by the time they're down to the last she washes him with milk and lye and wraps him in her arms and breaks the curse and he becomes a man again?

Yeah we're doing that with Megamind. Also there may be an AU I'm leaving a trapdoor for myself with where Roxanne fucks Dragon!mind after a few sheds. Haven't decided yet. Should I?

Consolation prize: I don't remember why I called it tha- oh wait yes I do. This is a gift fic I've been poking away at with a prompt for really inhuman Megamind being the one to rescue Roxanne and show why he's the big boss in town and he's ashamed he's not human enough but she embraces him anyway and they're incredibly tender with one another.

And...look. You know me. I don't really do easy comfort. There's something about trauma that makes me go "You cannot pivot straight into comforting someone while you're in the middle of a perfectly reasonable panic attack of your own. You gotta let your characters breathe and cry for a bit before they can have emotionally healthy conversations. But I'm trying! And everyone's probably going to be in shock anyway so we'll let that carry the emotional baggage. Also it is very tender in a let me wash the blood off your face kind of way. I should actually have it finished soon which is exciting.

Tea with Topsy (part 2): Not actually part 2 I just got sick of scrolling every time I opened it so I put all the published stuff into another document. It's technically on hiatus still but I'm finding it a lot more pleasant to work on when I'm not trying to keep to a schedule. There's lots of smut coming, some Megamind being threatening, and some Roxanne being sneaky (if we're lucky they might even say "I love you" this year) and Minion being best henchfish to ever hench. Plus plot! And emotional breakdowns! And more strawberry icecream!

Oil and Water: Okay that one's just smut. I'm aiming for 1000 words per chapter for the next couple of chapters and its really just Megamind and Roxanne exhibition hours and an idea I've had FOREVER about them getting busted. But they're having fun and that's what's important. (poor Warden better hope he never finds out what happened in his office).

Party Dress: Okay so! Did you know whatever Megamind fic goes up next on AO3 is going to be my 50th? Because that was a shock! And what is being human for except to ascribe random numbers pointless meaning, so I had to make it something special. I toyed with the idea of getting Paperwork Polycule or Blue Ruin started but they still need more work than I have the brain for so instead I decided it was time I actually finished the very first piece of Megamind fanfic I started!

It's a cute oneshot fairly early on where Megamind and Minion run into Roxanne who is avoiding the crowds at the Mayor's annual Christmas Party and they offer her a ride home. It was the first place I came up with a lot of fun/silly ideas that I'm sure people will be able to draw comparisons to other fics I've written when I post it.

Kittens: Roxanne discovers a box of abandoned kittens on her way to work and takes them home. Megamind appears, very annoyed she missed their appointment ("What appointment?" "The one where I kidnap you of course!" "Oh that. Pass" "Pass? What you can't just pass! This is a kidnapping!" "Sh! I'm busy.") And she shanghais him into watching them while she goes to get pet supplies.

There is purring.

As for the rest!

*deep breath* this part comes with musical accompaniment to set the mood

Blue Ruin - The 1920's Megamind is a mobster, Roxanne is a club singer AU.

A Cunning Disguise - Spy AU, Megamind and Roxanne are undercover as newlyweds trying to put a stop to...something (look its about the TENSION alright? What's important is how many times they have to kiss to throw someone off their trail)

Barley - aka 5 times Roxanne and Megamind wound up playing schoolyard games as he tried to kidnap her (chasey, hide and seek, dodgeball, nerf wars, the floor is lava etc)

Birthday Cakes - An Umbrella Academy fic where they find The Women's Weekly book of birthday cakes and insist they each finally deserve a proper one

Bluestocking - Working title, Regency AU where Roxanne is trying to keep her family estate and winds up married to Megamind for half historical scandal half revange reasons. They fall in love.

Catherine Wheel - Angst. Something goes wrong, Megamind gets injured, Roxanne yells her feelings, possibly everyone dies?

Chains - Megamind and Roxanne escape the Doom Syndicate and wind up in a safehouse that's really more of an abandoned garage for the night. Oh and they're handcuffed together.

Chicken - Megamind and Wayne team up to invite Roxanne to a threesome

Chunk! - Wayne punches Megamind and bends his ventral piercings. Roxanne has to but them out with a boltcutter. Edging for everyone!

Noone calls you Honey - TECHNICALLY complete but I have an idea for a later scene that involves Wayne fighting a speedster supervillain and Roxanne rescuing other damsels so its staying in the WIPs until I decide what to do with it.

Con Crunch - Roxanne sneaks into a Villain con, Megamind catches her and passes her off as his protege.

Dear Diary - The WIP title for Wait a Minute! Where Roxanne and Megamind are trapped in a time bubble for 30 days. Actual future chapters are drafted because I finally got the angsty one finished!

Dinner and Goodnight kisses - Actually cut from Topsy due to emotional damages. Roxanne asks Megamind to be her fake date for dinner, which he accepts. But she accidentally mistakes someone else for him instead. Cue betrayal, misery, and an apology dinner of takeaway thai food on her couch. And kisses.

Falling - Roxanne and Megamind have a ”one time thing” out of curisoity/boredom/horny. But it keeps happening. And so do feelings

Family dinner - Roxanne asks Megamind to be her date to her monthly family dinner with the horrible side of the family in the hopes she'll be banished.

Free on saturday? - 5 times Roxanne made Megamind be her fake date (and one time it wasn't fake at all) This one I borrowed some of my own family traditions and I will probably be a blubbery mess when I actually write the rest of it but its still tender right now since my Opa passed away.

Fly me to the moon - Once upon a time Nickel and I agreed to an exchange where she asked for Megamind and Roxanne meeting as adults. I had two ideas, one was Back of Beyond (which I'm delighted you enjoyed) and the other is this, Roxanne is a junior reporter kidnapped by a couple of of aliens and is being kept in their spaceship on the other side of the moon while they try to figure out how to ransom her for the fuel they need to get back to the rest of the galaxy. Also Wayne is a space cop. Mostly made of teeth. And Minion's robot body turns into a motorcycle.

Formal Wear - The continuation and the prequel of A Formal Affair, where Megamind and Roxanne start their little getaways and also Wayne finally gets the courage up to ask to be the wall they fuck against.

Gloves are off - There is a trend for hero and villain themed onlyfans. Roxanne gets asked to do a story on some of them and finds one account that does a really good Megamind impression. Like REALLY good.

Hadestown - A 13/Dhawan!Master Dr Who Hadestown AU where the Doctor is Persephone and the Master is Hades

Into Temptation - The next installment of the Crowded House collective. Its the night before a very big event and Roxanne asks Megamind to visit...(soft angst, smut and feels)

Intruder Window (my working titles are so I can save the doc, not because I know what I'm doing) - The Tapetum Lucidum series. I hope you're ready to get laid

Mentality Machine Misfire - Prequel to Rings. What did happen when Megamind and Roxanne wound up as Brain-bots?

Mer couture - The sequel to Haute Water. (I blame @kizzyanel) I'm waiting on the next Met Gala for more inspiration because at the moment its just Megamind and Minion pleasing Roxanne in the bath.

Mistress Roxanne - Megamind runs into Roxanne in a dungeon and finds out he has a hitherto undiscovered sub streak a mile wide. Sexy shenanigans ensue.

Nails - A Nails AU based on the short story from Round the Twist. There are mermaids.

Never drink alone - Wayne Megamind and Minion all get absolutely trashed on a particular cocktail at a Scott Family party (so much for that evil plan) a none to sober herself Roxanne has to wrangle them back to Wayne's room and keep them there till they all sober up. No one has a filter. Also truth or dare.

Noticeable - Pride and Prejudice AU - Mary asks Kitty for help to make her beautiful enough Mr Collins will ask her to marry him. Mostly about sisterly bonding.

Nowhere to run - Roxanne stumbles on Megamind right after he accidentally kills someone in self defense. She takes him home and cleans him up and keeps his secrets.

Operation Seduction - Wayne and Roxanne are fuckbuddies who team up to seduce Megamind.

Paperwork Polycule - Roxanne marries all her aliens to make sure they don't get deported. of course this means they have to live together for a year and oh dear what feelings are these? (Wayne and Minion have the most helpless crushes on each other).

Penelope - A Penelope/Colin Bridgerton story about Penelope writing a vicious takedown of herself as Whistledown and the fallout as the Bridgerton family comes to her defence.

Prime numbers - It's not even a real kiss! Just a kiss on the cheek because they were both laughing at the brainbot tangled in mistletoe. So why is Megamind running in a panic and who is Roxanne going to have to kill for making him feel like he's not even allowed such a small gesture of affection?

Roxanne is dead - (thrilling title I know) Except she's not, she's hiding in the Lair from everyone while the rest of the world THINKS she's dead. Megamind included. A lot of angst and slow feels

Same time next week - Megabyte and Dot don't intentionally make a habit of running into one another at Al's diner. But it keeps happening (will end in alley sex)

Selkie - Roxanne's greatest secret is her pelt. When her house is robbed and Megamind returns it to her, any number of strange things about her suddenly start to make sense. (Also there are whiskery seal kisses)

Six of Crows Bar and Restaurant - A slice of life AUabout the Six of crows but as restaurant workers

Speed Chess - A Queens Gambit oneshot about playing speedchess in the park

Table for Two - Sarcasm serves Megamind and Roxanne well when instead of the evil plan that was supposed to be happening, Minion has arranged...dinner?

Tattoo Roses - The flowershop/Tattoo parlour AU that I will have more than just slice of life scenes if I ever figure out how

The inherent evil of turtlenecks - Bernard is back and he is out for revange! Unfortunately Megamind has found his greatest weakness, advice on how to be a better supervillain. Homoeroticism and evil plans abound.

The Morning after - Roxanne and Megamind run into each other out of town and wind up spending the night together. What's going to come of this neither of them know.

Please Break Me Gently - Megamind collapses four steps into Roxanne's apartment after the Black Mamba fight. An adult retelling of what happens next with all the bruises left in.

The Vast of what comes after - A Vast of Night continuation of how and where Faye and Everett and Maddy come back.

Tofu - Megamind steals Roxanne's lunch one day and discovers tofu is an aphrodisiac to his species. Roxanne offers to help out

Toy Room - Megamind has a sex room built during his villainous days. Roxanne finds it. Fun times ensue.

Tryst in me - Sequel to "She's all out to get you" Wayne Megamind and roxanne have got a pretty good handle on how to run her city. But Roxanne really can't stop thinking about Megamind's hands. She decides to do something about it. (the something is Megamind)

Up n at em - Also technically finished but I have a sequel chapter about how they fell in love and how it was Roxanne and Minion first.

Voyager - Yes the one you used to write Embers to Ashes. the line "These are supposed to be gills!" still lives rent free in my head so its becoming a post movie angstfest at some point.

Waltz - Megamind finds Roxanne sneaking around at a party. The price for his silence? A dance.

Who bit my familiar? - A WWDITS story about Guillermo waking up a vampire.

You must be this tall to fire the giant laser - Megamind accidentally shrinks Roxanne down to 5 years old. Chaos ensues.

*falls over gasping* And there you have it! That music was in my head the ENTIRE time I was writing this out. (sometimes I really do have to wonder if I don't have some kind of ADHD)

Also thank you for making me tidy up my WIP folder, it actually shrank because I stuffed all the random bits and pieces and all those "An Idea" minifics the server pulls out of me into one document so yay! (I did not do those, that would have been another 20 odd)

[the-chosen-fanfiction]

Gentile. | Chapter 12

Now that Machaerus is in sight, Atticus has to drop you off, but not without a proper goodbye.

Chapter list

Panic is the first emotion shunting through you when you rouse at the feeling of a strong, bare arm around your waist. You squirm and move away from Quintus’ form, not wanting to feel his breath on your shoulder, and you sit up slightly, leaning on your elbows to face your husband—

– Not your husband. Relief floods you at the sight of a peacefully sleeping Atticus, hair tousled and face mushed against a rolled up fur that serves as a pillow. Underneath the blanket you see a sliver of chest hair and you swallow thickly at the sight, memories of last night dancing inside your mind. You cannot fight the soft smile that spreads and gently card your fingers through the soft, dark locks that fall in front of his face. You pull the dark woollen cloak that he had draped over you for extra warmth over your form and settle down next to him in order to relish in the rare moment of peace.

He huffs a soft breath that tickles your cheek and you hum dreamily, caressing the stubble that has grown to become a full beard at this point - it had felt simply delightful against your thighs - and he starts to show signs of awakening. Atticus’ eyelids flutter and you withdraw your hand slightly, fearing that your actions have roused him against your intentions.

The grin that tugs at his lips as he sighs a yawn takes away your concerns. “Hmm, good morning,” he mumbles deeply before opening one eye, his fingers already tangling in the fabric of your nightgown to pull you against him, “By the gods, I slept so well.”

“So have I,” you murmur, “You’ve worn me out.”

He chuckles and watches you with bleary eyes, chewing on the inside of his cheek. “I’m sorry. Also about the marks on your neck, by the way.” Your hand shoots up to the sore, crescent shaped spots he’s placed there, for you hadn’t even noticed them until now, and you flush. 

“Thank you for last night,” you whisper genuinely. He swallows and runs his fingers down your back, softly endearing you. “It was… It was wonderful.”

“There is more where that came from.” he flirts.

You bite your lip and smile. “Oh, I bet.”

He laughs and closes his eyes, comfortable in the pillow, “I love how you’re loosening up as time passes. A few weeks ago you would have waved me off with one of your adorable abashed whimpers.”

You hum and cuddle into him, listening to his heartbeat that lulls you into a drowsy state. “I wish we could always stay like this.”

Atticus’ fingers halt in their caresses and he huffs a smile. “Hm, me too. We should enjoy the moment while it lasts.” His fingers tighten their grip, causing you to gasp.

“Attic—Ooh!” you squeal in surprise when he pulls you on top of him, settling his hands on your hips. Your body arches towards him inherently, a look of astonishment on your face. He chuckles, raising one eyebrow.

“Too bold?”

You let out a small noise. “Perhaps.”

“Want me to stop?”

“No.”

A sudden roll of his hips makes you topple over onto him, catching yourself on his shoulders. He laughs, moves some hair behind your ear and hikes up your nightgown with deft fingers. “You beautiful woman,” he grunts, the fire inside your gut burning bright again in the same way it had done last night, “Gonna make you sing for me again, darling.”

And sing you do. The sun is already well in the sky when he finally allows you to rest in the furs he’s made you claw at. Exhausted already though the day has barely started, you lay paralysed, trying to catch your breath whilst he reaches for the damp rag he’s cleaned you up with previously to repeat the gesture, careful to not be too harsh in his scrubbing. 

A soft laugh leaves both of you when you let out a tiny yelp at the sensitivity of your body. Atticus presses a lingering kiss against your shoulder and sighs. “What am I to do with you now, hm?” 

You hum and look at him besottedly. “Are you going to sweep me away to unknown lands? Cross the border to Egypt, or alternatively, somewhere to the east? I think we could survive pretty well on our own.”

He makes a thoughtful sound and bites his bottom lip. “I think we would. I’ll have to give that some thought. Until then, let’s drop you off at Machaerus.”

You know that he is only joining you in your little fantasy and that it would never be carried out, but it still gives you a sliver of silent hope.

“I hope I can walk,” you whisper.

Atticus chuckles. “If not, that just means I’ve done a good job.”

With the bittersweet goodbye looming at the horizon, you dress and pack in silence. Worry settles in the pit of your gut as you lean against the wagon, watching him kick out glowing embers of the fire and empty a bucket of water on top of it, making it sizzle. He tosses it into the back of the cart and turns to you, his face slightly falling at your sullen expression.

“Hey, what’s going on?” He puts his hands on your shoulders and slides them down, intertwining your fingers with his once he arrives there. Atticus brings your knuckles to his lips and kisses them gently. “Our night was way too beautiful for you to be pouting, now.”

“It was,” you agree, “But I’m going to miss you.”

He smiles wryly and rubs his nose against yours before giving you a soft kiss. You resist the urge to chase his lips once he pulls back. “I’ll miss you too,” he muses, “But I’ll write to you.”

“Do you promise?” He nods.

Another peck lands against your lips. “I hope you do realise that we cannot kiss goodbye once I drop you off at the court,” he rumbles, “So let us do so now.” You lean your head against the wagon with a relaxed sigh as he tilts his head to deeply snog you. Courageously, you dare slip your tongue into it. The intimate night has made you more comfortable around him, and it’s surprising how easily you allow him to touch you.

You drape your arms around his neck and stand on your tiptoes as he softly grunts into your mouth, his arm tugging you closer around your waist, the other cradling the back of your head. You breathe one another’s air, that starts to grow shorter.

Something appears within the kiss. 

Desperation .

Suddenly, your eyes are burning and your throat feels tight with emotion. You don’t want him to go. You gently pull away from him, lowering your gaze so that you don’t have to look at him for a moment. 

“What if something happens to you?”

Atticus smiles and tips up your chin with his index finger. “Nothing will happen to me. I know very well how to stick to the shadows. With the years of experience I’ve got under my belt, it’s not difficult to remain alive.”

Nothing can truly take that fear from you, and so, instead of protesting, you simply sigh.

You stand like that for a while, drinking in one another’s presence. His warmth settles inside your bones as he wraps you in a tight embrace. “I’ll come and fetch you as soon as I can,” he promises. 

Alas, the time to leave approaches. The pair of you climb up on the wagon for the final stretch of your trip. Your head comes to rest against Atticus’ arm and he smiles, wrapping an arm around you and taking the reins in his hands. With a small flick of the leather line, he shifts the horses into a steady pace. It’s only a few hours off.

“I think,” you muse, “That you’ve given me enough inspiration to write about during my time in Machaerus.”

Atticus lets out a laugh. “And if not, I’ll gladly provide you with some ideas through the post. Which, for the record, should not be read in the presence of others.”

Your face heats up at the thought and your heart skips a beat. “Why not?”

“I think you know.” His cheeky grin tells a thousand tales.

You attempt once again to finish the poem and letter to your brother. It is coming together easier today. Atticus casts occasional glances down at the swirl of your pen against the parchment and hums whenever he sees a line he particularly likes. 

A pleasant squirm leaves you when he brushes his lips against your jaw right when you finish the concluding sentence of your verse and turn to him to meet his affection for a moment. “What have you written?” he queries right after you part from him.

You clear your throat and flick one page back, where the poem starts.

“Fragile she’ll lay in your palm, your world, she’ll rest close to your heart. The blessing that forms on your tongue pours out over her…” 

He listens intently as you recite your work whilst you occasionally glance at him in between stanzas, his responses and little huffs of amusement genuine, and with every noise, you find yourself falling more in love with him. The other side of the coin does also draw near - the end of your wonderful and pivotal trip together - but he promised he will return to you, and so, you will cling onto that.

“...And against your nature, pull through, for your sun, for she will bloom.” you conclude your composition, ending with a soft smile and a sigh. “I’m content about how it turned out,” you muse. 

“As you should. I’m certain that he’ll love it, darling.” 

The way he speaks to you feels as familiar as if you’ve been together for years now. You squirm a little and blush, leaning into him. “Thank you.” 

“If you ever need a business on the side, you should consider taking commissions.”

The smile drops from your features. “Hm, I fear that I will never be in a position to be making a name for myself.”

Atticus notices your sudden shift in mood and kisses the side of your head right as he veers the carriage left at an intersection, a fortress on top of a hill that can only be Machaerus appearing on the horizon. “I’m sure you will find your way in life. All you need is a little more time.” 

His hands tug the reins to make the horses slow and he turns to you. “I think this would be a good location to sneak in another kiss. After that, it will be best for you to sit in the back again. I’ll need to act distant and so do you, so don’t take it to heart, alright? I care for you, deeply.”

“I care for you too,” you whisper, adding: “I understand.”

“Good.” he breathes, “Really good.”

You shouldn’t dally, for it is only a matter of time before a patrol will come your way to assist you. Despite the short nature of the kiss, you melt into it, your eyes closing as his hand cups your cheek, the metal of his ring cool against your skin. You lock the feeling away, the way his plump mouth presses to yours, the slight and pleasant scratch of his beard against your chin, his scent and the heat of his fingers. 

He pulls away way too soon, thumbing at your bottom lip softly, a sad sigh leaving his lungs. “You beautiful woman,” he mutters, “How much I wish I wouldn’t have to drop you off at this pit of hypocrites.”

Your eyebrows shoot up in slight surprise, for you have no true idea about his political preferences, nor about whose side he really is on. Not that you are at all orthodox with your political beliefs and alliances. Quintus would highly frown upon your thoughts on how he treated the people of Capernaum and others in general. Speaking of which, you were guilty of adultery in every sense of the word at this point.

Reluctantly, you brushed your mouth against his hastily before climbing off the driver’s seat. “You cannot help it,” you told him after sitting down behind him. The wagon jerked back into motion. “You are only doing as you’re told.”

“Hm, I never knew that making love to the Praetor’s wife was part of my job description.”

You let out a tiny noise whilst your cheeks turn pink, a laugh leaving your lips. “I– I suppose?”

“You suppose?” His eyes glitter with amusement, “You reckon that it’s hidden somewhere in my contract between the small letters at the bottom?”

You click your tongue and he chuckles. “Alright, love,” his smile falters, “Time to put on our act now. A few men are riding our way.”

Taking your embroidery from your bag - something you hadn’t touched for a while - you try to appear busy with your craft whilst the soldiers brush up at the sides of the wagon, eyeing it suspiciously.

“What is your business here?” one man asks Atticus. 

“Atticus Aemilius Pulcher, sir, here to escort lady (Y/n), the wife of Praetor Quintus of Capernaum.”

The man lets out a sound. “Ah, Cohortes, we have been expecting lady (Y/n) indeed. Follow us. Hail Caesar.”

“Hail Caesar.” Atticus counters. Your eyes flit to the two riders riding at the back of the wagon now, your throat running dry at their scrutiny. They’re armed to the teeth, even their horses are covered in plate armour, with large shields and spears on their form. They look different from the cavalry in Capernaum. You shrink a little in your seat, finding comfort in Atticus’ proximity.

The wagon pulls up next to a large fortress, where a soldier quickly checks the back. “Hail Caesar,” he tells you, and you raise your hand in slight greeting. 

“Hail.”

The cart is led inside under tight security and you end up in what feels like a city altogether. All kinds of people are bustling about under the scent of bread and mud and you crawl towards the end of the carriage to take in the view. A few women whisper hurriedly amongst one another and send a curious glance your way, at which you give them a friendly smile. They frown and turn back to their gossipping, a confused look coming over your features. A few stray chickens hop onto the road right after the cart passes by, pecking the tracks its wheels leave behind in the hopes of finding something edible. Soldiers march to take over from their peers at the gate closing behind you. Somewhere in the distance, a horse whinnies. 

The wagon halts and you need a moment to gather yourself before a soldier appears in your field of vision, bowing as a greeting. “My name is Titus Hadrianus, my lady, commander Primi of—”

“With all due respect, Primi, I don’t think she cares.” Atticus interrupts, reaching for you so that you can take his hand and step out of the carriage. “We had a long journey, I don’t believe the lady needs to know your nonsensical string of titles, hm?”

“I do not suppose she does, sir. Excuse me.”

“Praetor Quintus has sent forward most of her belongings.” Atticus explains whilst you climb out of the carriage. He immediately releases you and takes a step away from you. Out of courtesy and to keep up the guise, you know, but it stings nevertheless. “May I inquire about whether they have arrived or not?”

“I believe they have, sir. This morning.”

“And is everything sorted out?” 

“Once this wagon has been unloaded, then yes, sir.”

Atticus smiles. “Good, Primi. You see, I need to report back to the Praetor as fast as I can. It may be an uncommon request, but I will need to leave behind the cart and take one of my horses on the way back. Once the lady can be picked up again, I shall take the wagon with me also.”

Titus nods. “That can be arranged, sir.”

“What of her safety? Will she have a confidant?”

You await Titus’ answer anxiously as he looks around. “Yes, sir. She should be here any time soon.”

As if on cue, a brunette sidles up to you with an expectant look on her face. She appears to be a few years older than you and wears a few pieces of expensive jewellery. “Uh, hello. You must be lady (Y/n), wife to Praetor Quintus of Capernaum, right?”

You give her a small smile and bow a little. “That would be me.”

“How wonderful to meet you,” She kindly smiles, “My name is Joanna. My husband works for Herod’s court. I will be your confidant during your stay here. If there is anything you need, you can come to me. For now, I will show you to your quarters.”

“Thank you so much, Joanna, it is a pleasure to meet you.” Your entire nature has shifted into your professional approach. “If you do not mind me doing so, I need to send off my escort first.”

“Naturally,” Joanna says, stepping back a little. 

You turn to Atticus and give him a smile as neutral as possible. “I’m grateful for your protection on our way here, Cohortes. Thank you. I shall inform my husband of your services, so that he may reward you accordingly.”

He puts a hand on his chest and gives a small bow. “It’s my duty, my lady. You will receive a letter in the post once I will come to fetch you.”

“Very well. Safe travels, Cohortes.”

“You stay safe too, my lady.”

Lingering for too long would raise suspicion, and so, you follow Joanna towards a large building, every step increasing the sudden heaviness of your heart. Behind you, Atticus starts uncoupling the horses from the cart and chooses the strongest one. 

“This way,” Joanna tells you, opening a door. She holds it for you, waiting for you to pursue her inside. You dare to cast one final glance in Atticus’ direction, hoping he’s looking at you.

You catch his gaze immediately, your heart stuttering in your chest. He gives a small wave as a greeting, which you reciprocate. The Roman woman still waiting for you lets out a small hum, pulling you from your little interaction to look at her in question. She smiles with a small raise of her brow.

“Interesting.” she muses, prompting you to follow her inside with flushed cheeks. “Very interesting.”

“Beg your pardon?” 

Joanna halts and gives you a tiny grin. “Nothing. Let me show you to your room first so you can freshen up. I’ll have some servants prepare you a bath.”

That does sound nice after two-and-a-half days travelling on a dusty road, so you don’t protest it and don’t bother pressuring her to tell what she meant by interesting .

You are led up some stairs and at the end of the hallway find a room twice the size of your own home. “This would be your place,” Joanna says, handing you the key.

It takes everything in your being to not gawk at the luxurious environment whilst observing the room. A large bed stands as the centrepiece in the middle of the room. Deep purple drapes adorn the windows and the carpets must have come all the way from Asia. Your small chest of belongings with the familiar letters SPQR on the front stands on the desk already. Around it, there are a few crates of other items you’ve brought.

“This is way more than I ever could have asked for. Thank you, Joanna.”

She gives you a small bow. A few servants brush past the two of you to head into the bathroom to prepare you a hot bath. “It’s nothing. After all, as your confidant it’s my task to make sure you are comfortable here whilst you visit us. Your husband paid us good money to keep you pleasant and safe.”

Your eyes widen. “He has?”

Joanna blinks in slight puzzlement. “You didn’t know? Everything is covered to the highest extent. You’ll be allowed to use whatever facilities you’d like.” 

Slowly nodding, you swallow thickly. “Alright,” you whisper, repeating “Thank you.” 

“If you need me, my room is three doors down on the right.” she tells you, “The door with the small red lilies on the panes. Meet me whenever you’re ready, so that I can give you a tour of the place.”

She heads for the door to leave you be. You sit on the edge of the bed and sigh, drinking in the unfamiliar place you’d have to call your home for an undisclosed amount of time. You aren’t sure if you like it or not, but what you do know is that you are definitely not used to it.

You wait for a while until the servants exit the bathroom quietly, the sign that the bath is ready.

The water is pleasantly scalding, yet your gut twists with dread as you rinse away the final remnants of Atticus’ lovemaking, although purple, beautiful bruises remain.

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[urfavouritegirlie]

Chapter 7

Aaron POV

Did I mention the I'm acting like a complete fool. Not once have I ever frozen over like this. I force myself to answer her question.

"I'm doing good."

"That's good."

The next thing that comes out of my mouth is out my control. I wasn't thinking at all. It's like brain went into auto pilot.

"I missed you."

She gives her sweet smile.

"I missed you too."

She then goes from looking at me to behind me.

"Oh my goodness, is that MILES?"

And with that her attention shifts to Miles. I turn to them.

"Oh jeez, you have grown so much. Look at you, you're a young man now. How are doin?"

"I'm doing good actually. It's nice to see you again but how is work?"

"Ugh so busy but not anymore. I have decided to move back here in New York. I can still work here. Travelling is fun but exhausting."

Did I hear that correctly. She's moving back. Yeah, but for how long. It's like I'm intellectually linked with my nephew right now because he asks her the question I've been thinking.

"For how long?"

"Oh for good. I missed everyone here."

"Maya, have you eaten? I know you had a long flight and plane food is tasteless." Rio drags Maya to the tables filled with food and serves her a plate.

"Yooo uncle Aaron, what happened man? I thought you were gonna put your rizz game on. She had you stuttering." Miles laughs at me.

"Man hush."

People continue as they were, dancing and eating. Maya and Rio are talking their girl talk. Jeff is still barbecuing and Miles had probably ran off to his room with his other cousins.

"So Maya, what are the men around the world like?"

This hooks mine and Jeff attention. The whole place is on mute but their convo. I look at Jeff and he's facing that table too. We are close enough to hear their talk but not to be noticed.

"Gurl, I seen em all. Especially the rich ones. Let me tell you something. As a global estate agent I have seen all kinds of celebrities. Ive sold places to artists, actors, athletes, models, CEO's and top business people . Rappers especially. You know how they like to flaunt their money."

"Tell me."

"So, you know 50 cent right?"

"You met 50 cent? Do tell."

Are you kidding me right now? Freakin' 50 cent? For a winter in Brooklyn, it's getting pretty warm right now. I want to hear the story but not at the same time.

"Yeah, I sold him a villa in the Bahamas. I was showing him the place and he was being a flirt the whole time. He said he brought the place because a fine woman showed him around. He even asked me to be one of his video babes and act as his wifey in his music video."

I'm so close to walking out and gearing up in my suit and hunting the man down.

"Well what did you say?"

"I said nah."

"HUH WHY?"

"Because....... I told him that I already have a man. Chile you know rappers, they just wanna get in your pants."

There's a warm feeling in my heart when she says that. I relax back in my seat.

"Aww look at you. He's got you starstruck."

I can hear someone approach me from behind.

"You almost had her stollen from you by 50 cent, personally I don't think I would recover from that." Jeff says.

"Don't try it man."

Maya's loyalty to me was beyond my mind. I mean I would do the same by probably rejecting Beyoncé or something. She's amazing and talented and all but she just wasn't Maya. I honesty don't see what she sees in me.

The day seems to come to an end with people going home and the sun disappearing with them. The rooftop is illuminated with fairy light and many light bulbs. From where I am sitting I can see Maya yawn. Jet-lag must be catching up for her.

"I didn't see you come with any luggage. Just your handbag."

"Oh yeah about that, my stuff is in another state. The baggage handlers put everyones luggage in the wrong plane. I'll probably get it delivered tomorrow or the day after. It's really annoying, I had some presents for people."

"Are you kidding me, you making it for Christmas is a present its self especially for a certain someone."

Maybe I should stop eavesdropping on Maya and Rio's conversation.

"How could I not, after you told me about Miles and Aaron talking about me, I had to come back." She turns around her seat to look at me and wink. I swear Miles has a big mouth sometimes but at least it made her come over.

Now it’s dark and some people have left. Meanwhile Maya and Rio were in the kitchen finishing up some dishes.

"Ok, we are finished. There was a lot of stuff to wash. I guess this goodnight."

"What? Already? But it's only......1:30am."

"Exactly Rio, it's late. I'm sure Miles has passed out in his room." Jeff announces.

Speak of the devil, Miles shows up from his room. He deffo looked like he took a nap cuz he has drool and pillow marking on the side of his face.

"Are you leaving already?"

"Oh Miles don't make me laugh. It's late. I'll see you again soon ok. You can visit anytime too. You know where I’ll be. Come here give me a hug."

He walks up to her and hugs her and she returns the hug but tighter. Call me crazy but I swear he just turned his head to give me a sly smirk. This kid knows exactly what he's doing. Lucky for me I will have her to myself.

"Ok we gotta get going. I'm sure Maya could also pass out at any moment."

"Thanks for coming over Maya, it's been a while and it was nice to catch up." Jeff says.

Rio and Miles escort us to the door after Maya put on he her jacket and took her bag.

"Thanks for the invite to this Christmas party. See you soon and take care. Bye"

And with that it's finally just me and her. We walk in the nearly empty streets of Brooklyn to our place. The air is freezing to the touch and can see that she's shivering. Without a thought I wrap my arm around her and bring her closer to me.

"Your warm. I probably won't let go."

"I wouldn't dream of it."

"You know I know Miles was tryna piss you off with the hug earlier. I could tell you were slightly irritated but brushed off."

"I may have told him about how you gave him all of your attention when he was a baby and how it almost made me jealous."

"You being jealous of a kid now and then is so petty. Well I'm here now."

"Yeah and you're mine. I really don't like sharing."

She stops in front of me and makes me stop. She looks up.

"Jealousy looks funny on you."

"I think it's only acceptable if it's for you."

She gives that smile again. I give her a smirk back. This makes her bite her lip and look away. Before she changes the subject, I place both my hands to each side of her side to make her look at me again. Her big brown eyes twinkle with the Christmas lights around us. Her nose and cheeks a light shade of pink from the cold.

I leaned over and both of our lips connect. It's a passionate and love filled kiss. She's stiff at the beginning because it was unexpected but she quickly relaxes into it. She lifts her arms to hold on to me as I move my hands to her waist. I lift her until her feet are off the ground for two seconds and then I put her down. We break apart from the kiss. She looks dazed and as do I.

"I was waiting to do that for so long."

She laughs and I pick her up and throw her over my shoulder. She's squealing as she hold on. We both continue until we get home. I scan the key and the door opens. We climb up the stairs. We reach the door but that's when I remember a slight flaw.

"The place is kinda not clean. I mean I didn't know you were coming. J-just wait here."

I speed walk in and do what I can. Remove pizza and Chinese takeaway boxes. Pick up a few boxers and socks. Especially hide the gadgets in a box. I was working on my suit and left it out. That needs to go. I do a mental checklist as I go back to open the door, where she's standing.

"Ron, I'm sure it's not too bad. Nothing I can't clean up."

She trots in like she wasn't away for eight years. She looks around the place and my heart start to pick up.

"Oh my God."

Oh God help me.

"You have a new car?"

Huh? What car? She jiggle some keys in my face. Oh.

"Not a car but a motorcycle."

Her eyes widen and they have a twinkle in them.

"Wha- since when?"

"Since you left. I gave away that old car."

She looks around some more. I did get the motorcycle some time after she left. It was easier for me to travel to my missions.

She takes off her jacket and hangs with my other ones. Some thing catches her eyes and I follow where she's looking.

"Oh damn. I didn't know you where into swords and stuff. It looks real."

She goes to touch it but they are very much real and very much sharp.

"Wait! Ummm did you see my punching bag."

She turns to the side and focuses on that. She starts giving it punches and kicks.

"Since when where you into boxing?"

"I used to do underground boxing remember. But now I just do it to keep in shape."

“Oh right. Almost forgot you used to fight.”

She does she eyebrow thing showing that she's impressed.

"It's like I'm getting to know you from beginning again or I'm finding out about this new side of you. Do you still do graffiti?"

"At my big age? Nah"

A/N - Yep kinda went over board with this one. Being a Christmas chapter and all. I aspire to write this much or more in the upcoming chapters. The starts ones were a bit shorter. I kinda end the chapter when I run out of ideas.

[robrae-is-forever]

Not going to lie, I am super disappointed with the new Spiderverse movie.

Spoilers btw but I’m just gonna ramble

It’s pretty clear that Sony wanted a trilogy and forced the writing team to stretch the film out into a duology, because this film is fucking bloated with nonsense and time wasting stuff, and that cliffhanger sequel baiting ending left me going, “That’s it?” 

When it slows down to compensate for the script being torn into two movies, it slows down and man you can feel it. It doesn’t slow down for anything important either; I get that the emotional moments need some levity but goddamn they go on for way longer than anything in the first film, and for a lot less important stuff, too. The first film was fast paced and kinetic, and after rewatching today I can say that it was never as dull as this when it slowed down.

Miles feels really generic after “growing up” and accepting his role as Spiderman, and I wasn’t expecting his usual dorkiness to wear off on me so quickly in this film.  He was an awkward teen being forced to fill the large shoes of the hero before him, and the first film didn’t have to play it up to sell his character to us. How can he be as good as Spider-Man when Peter already exists?

With good writing, which the first film had, and this film, whether due to how stretched thin it is or something else, doesn’t have it. Honestly, I really can’t stand how everyone is in love with Miles. Gwen shows up to Miles universe and goes, “It’s always so nice talking to you” and it really bugged me because I’m just like 

“bitch you haven’t talked to him in months, and you barely talked to him in the last film what are you on about”

And then the Peter from the first film shows up with his new daughter and is like “I had her because of you because I thought she’d grow up to be like you because I think you’re cool” and I’m like

“that’s fucking weird, maybe you should let your daughter grow up to be her own person instead of the awkward kid you barely mentored and don’t know anything about at all other than he’s a spiderman”

I don’t know anything about Miles in the comics or in the recent game because I’m a spider enjoyer not a spider fan, but there isn’t enough about Miles for me to like in this new film. He’s upset that he can’t be Spider-Man and himself, which is something Toby Maguire figured out all the way back in the early 00′s, and this film doesn’t do anything new with that plotline.

The first spiderverse film was good because it tread new ground with a well known backstory, about an outcast kid getting powers and learning to use them for good. The addition of a version of a burned out character we know and love, as well as the new spider people helping Miles as a person and fledgling hero, was entertaining. What does he have now that he’s grown up? Not much.

Now he’s just going through Toby’s phase, in a stretched out movie, where everyone loves him and thinks he’s so great despite not having as much of an interesting personality this time around, and also not doing anything important, either. He doesn’t stop the main villain, he just complains a lot that he isn’t getting his way. Don’t get me wrong, he’s still got some good jokes, and I like the Spot and Miguel, but this film was way too long with way too little happening in it. This film also focuses way too much on the side characters instead of on Miles, like it wants Gwen and Spot to be the main character, and as a result it really doesn’t feel like there’s a main character at all.

There are some other stupid things I don’t like, too. Why is there a pregnant black woman riding a motorcycle and fighting? Babies are soft and should not be exposed to battle with superpowered characters, and pregnant women have trouble moving around. Like, seriously. They can have trouble standing up in the later stages of pregnancy, because they can’t rotate and push themselves up because of the baby bump sometimes. So how am I expected to believe that she’s being a super bad ass, even with powers? I don’t know who she is, and I really don’t care. The first film gave us a quick rundown on all the spider people when they showed up, and I don’t know a single thing about this chick. At the very least, she didn’t have to be pregnant, it added nothing to the film while it was in motion and was genuinely distracting.

The whole spider society thing just made me think of the early Rick and Morty seasons with the whole “council of ricks citadel and evil morty” bullshit. I did not go into this wanting to think about that cartoon, and unfortunately it’s all I could think about in the quarter of the movie that it takes up. Try and tell me it doesn’t remind you of it a little bit.

Now, as a big ol shipper who loves well written romances, I can firmly say I’m not buying this “will they won’t they” shit with Miles and Gwen. She had barely warmed up to being Miles’ friend by the end of the last film, and I already outlined why above that I think it’s stupid, but to add to it, all Gwen thinks about is Miles in this film and I’m like “damn bitch have some agency”. They keep trying to insert all these little tidbits to make Miles jealous and whatnot and I’m just sitting here like

“no”

Here are some choice quotes from the first film to remind you of what Gwen thinks of Miles: “You know I’m older than you, right? 15 months older, but that’s pretty significant if you ask me”, “You don’t get to like my haircut”, “I don’t think you know what puberty is”, “Friends”...

Funny lines of dialogue to be sure, but definitely not romantic. Especially not when she lost her version of Peter Parker, then reunites with another one. I’m not saying she had to fall for burnt out Peter, but the fact that the first film did nothing with it, and then this film for the most part just makes her a one note track about Miles, really rubbed me the wrong way. Especially when she points out that nothing good happens to the Gwen’s who fall in love with Spider-Man.

I guess it’s all about expectations, ironically. Miles didn’t know how to step into Spiderman’s suit, and this sequel doesn’t know how to follow up it’s excellent predecessor. It barely has an antagonist, it’s bloated with filler, the dialogue is stupid in many places, and it’s nice visuals aren’t enough to make up for it.

The only thing I personally think will save the third film would be to subvert those expectations. Have Miles turn down/reject Gwen because she lied to him about his dad’s impending death, have him turn away from Peter for being in on it, and have him step into his own shoes.

[acourtofthought]

Just here to tell you, coming from the hateful blog managed by, what I assumed is a grown ass woman (I'm 28, so it's not a dig at their age, it's a dig at their immaturity) that they continue to vague your blog on their posts.

I hope you never let them get to you. I'm someone who came into the fandom thinking it would be a fun place to interact and talk about our favorite characters, sure, I'd expect disagreements, but I never in a million years thought I'd come across women who act this childish over a ship and bully, harrass and send death threats. Are there Gwynriels and Eluciens as toxic? Sure. I've seen it but it's mostly in response to them... and they somehow act superior and only dish it but can't take it. But no one should have to take any of this.

This unhealthy obsession to be right and bully others, who disagree, can't be good for them IRL. There's feeling passionate, then there's them. The comments I've seen them leave all over Instagram, it's so transparent because it's the same accounts. It's to the point new fans on tiktok are calling them out. Not gonna lie, I feel a bit validated to see videos on tiktok calling out their shitty behavior, but it shouldn't be the case at all. No one, under any circumstances should be bullied over fictional characters. 

Ship your ship, no one cares they love Az and Elain, but imagine when all this is over and the embarrassment if they are wrong in their reading predications. No wonder they keep their accounts anonymous. I would never act so narcissistic and gloat before the series is even over, I can HOPE and WISH, but I never go around with 100% certainty and bully people over it only for it to blow up in my face. I'm not SJM and elriels need to be reminded neither are they. I hope they can eat their humble pie, if the day ever comes and apologize for their behavior. But that's me wishful thinking. Sorry to vent, just hate seeing how they used your post to manipulate their follwers into trying to bully you. They seem to have a problem with popular accounts. Wonder why. Jealousy perhaps?

Vent away because sometimes you need to get the thoughts out of your head so you can move forward without them!

I think people forget to keep things in perspective.

I enjoy this fandom and these books and I'm having a good time coming up with theories. Sometimes I'll even get in heated debates over differences of opinions and while that part is never the most fun, I vent or fume for a hot minute than move on.

But my real life exists outside my laptop or phone and when I'm sitting on my deathbed (at what is hopefully 100+ years old because I want to live as long as possible 😂) Lucien and Elain are not going to matter to me. E/riel is not going to matter to me. Blogger XYZ who hated me is not going to matter to me (at least in terms of the opposite opinions within the fandom sense, as a real person they will matter in terms of my wishing happiness for them).

I love the thought of Elucien and I don't think E/riel is matched based on the information I have so far. And sometimes my post are going to be harsh........about E/RIEL and AZ. If that is my big crime to blogger XYZ to the point that they feel the need to write posts about me and encourage others to bully me then.....................what can you do, right?

The one benefit of being older in this fandom is to not be as affected by a strangers opinion of me. Honestly, at this point, I'm not even all that affected by someone in my family's opinion of me. I struggled with that for a very long time. My father is not a part of my life and for a long time I wondered what I'd done wrong that was so bad he didn't want to know me. My mother is in my life but I'm a disappointment as a daughter because I got tattoos, am not proper enough for her and don't believe in the God she does and again, I felt this constant need for approval from the people that didn't like me for me and spent a lot of time doubting myself and caring what they thought. I've dealt with a lot of bullying from my older sibling over the years and finally stepped away from that relationship even though I had always felt guilty not keeping her a part of my life, that somehow I was the bad person for cutting her out. The older I've gotten, I started to realize that just because specific people had an opinion about me didn't make them the right opinions. If you don't respect someone as a person than you shouldn't be listening to their thoughts on you.

I love animals and reading. I LOVE traveling but am afraid of flying. I feel most at peace sitting in front of an ocean or driving around in my car listening to music. I love coffee and desserts and I rarely sit on chairs the right way because I get fidgety. Stick me in a bathtub and leave me there for an hour and I'll be extremely happy. I have a very sarcastic sense of humor, love Broadway musicals, action movies, hate cooking and love going out to eat. I never really wanted to be a mother and left the decision of kids up to my husband but they turned out to be the best thing I've ever done in my life. I'm never the best at anything but above average at a few things like drawing, singing (but have extreme stage fright), and dancing. I always tip 20% even if the service was poor and can only drink one alcoholic beverage at most unless I want to have the worst hangover the next day. People might think I'm social and outgoing upon meeting me but inside I'm sweaty and dying, thinking over every single thing I've said and whether I sounded stupid. I am extremely introverted and tend to make plans only to desperately wish I could get out of them that day (though I usually end up having a good time).

I am a lot of things outside this fandom but if someone wants to base everything I am in my life on who I ship in an SJM book, if they decide I'm stupid or a terrible person because I like a specific pairing and in this particular fictional world don't think two other characters are matched then I realize I just have to let it slide. I believe that one day, they will come to realize none of it actually mattered all that much and until then I guess I'd rather them target me than someone who struggles with the opinions of others on the internet as I might have once done years ago.