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thinking-in-symbols · 4 years ago

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Quinquennial Life Assessment

So, it’s been a few years. When I was 19 I posted a sort of “roadmap” for the evolution of my life on this blog. Today I thought I’d revisit that. I want to take a look back and see what progress I’ve made, and then in a separate post I want to turn to the future, think about how my vision for it has changed, and consider how I can reincorporate these goals into that vision.

This is the list of things I wanted to get done in varying time frames. I’ve crossed off the things I’ve done to get a sense of my progress:

1 year:

At 19, my hopes were to accomplish the following things by age 20:

- Joined, and consistently participated in, at least 2 campus organizations that suit my interests, at least 1 of which should be competitive in nature - well, I joined the ISO and KVRX, my college radio station! Neither of those were competitive, but in retrospect I don’t really care about that :-)

- Made concrete plans to study abroad - Nope, unfortunately I never did this. I’m not quite sure I regret that, all things considered - I traded that experience for other things. I did make plans to spend a few months abroad of my own accord, and I would have gotten away with it, too, if it weren’t for that meddling global pandemic. But as it stands I haven’t done this.

- Learned C++ and python to proficiency - Hm. “Proficient” is a relative term. But I think I have a tendency to downplay my skills, so in the interest of counteracting that I’m going to count myself as “proficient” in these languages. I think that’s fair.

- Gone on at least a several day road trip with at least 1 friend - I’ve gone on several trips with @meeshbug, my very lovely girlfriend and best friend in the world :-)

- Decided on a concentration beyond the extremely vague umbrella of “computer science” - Unfortunately as far as my education is concerned I never really did this. If anything my interests have *broadened* rather than becoming more focused. More on this later...

- Made meaningful, ongoing contributions to an open-source project - You know what? I’ve published the source of everything I’ve ever made, and I’ve gotten to the point where I can make stuff that’s not trivial. So I’m giving myself credit for this one.

- Learned to cook enough meals to eat in most days and not get sick of my own food - I wish. I’ve learned to cook a fair amount of stuff but I still get way too depressed and lethargic to apply that consistently. Whether I consider myself to have achieved this honestly depends on the month.

- Learned to keep my living area clean - I’m much better at this than I was at 19, but at 19 I could barely clear a path to walk across my room. So there’s more work to do. More on these last two later.

- Gotten a pet - Meesh and I have a dog named Courage (after the dog of cowardly fame) and a cat named Jax!

2 years:

- Independently written a piece of software to completion and deployed it publicly - I’ve always pretty bad at actually seeing projects through to completion, but I do have a few full, independent projects under my belt at this point. I’ve built a simple game engine, a pathtracer, plugins for games I like, and some other stuff.

- purchased and begun regularly using some basic amateur radio equipment - Ah man. I got my license but I still haven’t gotten any equipment. I guess I have to get on that...

- purchased and begun experimenting with some basic music recording equipment - This one I’ve done, but I haven’t done as much experimenting as I’d like.

- hosted a party - I did this for my 21st birthday and it’s one of my favorite memories! Honestly this was probably the last time I had all my really close friends in one place. I’m actually getting kind of emotional about that.

- done some kind of hallucinogen - I have now done this. I definitely did get something out of it, albeit not what I expected. This is something I actually only did pretty recently and it’s still having a pretty profound effect. Maybe I’ll write a separate post about this.

- Gone camping with friends - Despite my best efforts, this hasn’t happened yet. Pretty fucked up.

3 years:

- learned to play another instrument besides the piano (guitar?) - I don’t feel comfortable crossing this one off quite yet, but I went ahead and bought myself some guitar equipment and have been messing around with it lately :-) I think I’m going to have to bite the bullet and pay for lessons if I’m serious about this, which I am.

- Written and recorded a song - Damn, I can’t believe it’s been 5 years and I haven’t even done this.

- Met a group of people I can play music with - nope

- Owned a leather jacket. I can’t believe I’ve still never even owned a leather jacket - I’ve done this and wore it frankly too much. Kinda cringe.

- Worked as a professional software developer - Yep! Worked as a software developer for a retail company for a couple years. I’m actually not working as a software developer right now, though; I’m working in a sort of adjacent position. More on this later.

- Participated in research related to my field - That’s pretty ambitious. Not sure I’ll ever do this, unfortunately. But we’ll see.

- Been to a film festival - Oh shit, I totally forgot about having written this. That’s a cool idea. I should do this, it’s not like it’s hard (well, at least in principle. I guess covid kind of changes the situation).

- Gotten a dog - Courage is one of those, I think, although he might also be part rat.

- collected 50 records - Lol, my dumb ass really thought I was going to buy $1,000 worth of records on college money. No, I haven’t done this, but I’m on my way there.

- Purchased a desktop computer - Well, my dad gave me his old desktop. That’s not really a purchase but I think it counts.

5 years:

- Begun accepting freelance development gigs - haven’t gotten here yet and I’m not totally sure this is a direction I want to go in my career. Freelancing has its own stressors as I’ve come to learn from others. No career path is sunshine and roses and I’m trying to internalize this fact.

- Participated in a student film - Nope. I don’t even know why I wrote this down to be honest.

- Gotten laid by solving a 5x5 Rubik’s Cube in front of a girl because surely that’s gonna have to work on someone eventually, otherwise I wasted a lot of time - These are getting weird. Surely I didn’t really expect this to happen, right? Well, either way I now have a long-term girlfriend, so I don’t - wait, Meesh has seen me solve a Rubik’s cube and she saw it before we started dating. So actually I’m going to give myself credit for it. I’m the one who makes the rules here.

- Fleshed out my political opinions - Yes, I now know everything about politics and can answer 100% of questions on political issues. Just kidding. But I know where I stand.

- Participated in a protest or some other kind of political event - Done! Went to a few protests as part of the ISO, participated in lots of their events, and attended some protests with friends as well.

- Studied abroad - Nope :-/

- Learned a language other than Spanish - I took a semester of French! But I don’t quite want to give myself credit for this one because I really would like to learn a different language to something resembling fluency.

- Run a marathon - Lmao. I am in much worse shape now than I was when I wrote this post, and even at that time I could probably do like 7 miles if I really pushed myself. How sad.

- Gone hiking outside of texas - This is weird because I’d literally already done this when I wrote this post. But I’ve done it more since then, so hey!

- Been out of the country with a friend - This I had also already done. I guess the point is to have done it without “adult supervision” or whatever. I haven’t done this since writing this list so I guess I have to leave it uncrossed.

10 years:

- Lived with a girl for an extended period of time - Meesh 🥰

- Spent at least 6 months living on the road in an RV, preferably with a dog and a girl - God, I am so close to being able to do this. I don’t want it to be an RV anymore - those things are expensive. But a van? Still pricey, but doable, especially if I’m willing to sacrifice some comfort. This has actually been front-of-mind for a while. I’ll let you know when I get the balls to pull the trigger.

- Started making Real Money - Well, yep, I have gotten to that point. I do have other thoughts on this, though. Money is weird, man.

- Lived in a long-term living space outside of Texas (i.e. not including RV time) - How long is long-term? Three months? If so, I’ve done this by living in Boston with Meesh for a few months after she went there for law school. However, I anticipate staying there much longer in the near future, so I’ll wait on this crossing this one off.

- Written a book about something, idk - Not yet. I’m halfway to the deadline on this one and I have some ideas, but ideas aren’t worth all that much, especially to me, who rarely sees them through. We’ll see where this goes. It’s not exactly a priority and historically I struggle to get even my priorities done. It might make more sense to replace this with recording a concept or narrative album, for which I also have ideas that I happen to take more seriously.

- Learned to solve a 6x6 Rubik’s Cube - nope

- Gotten laid by solving a 6x6 Rubik’s Cube - nope

- Lived in an apartment where I pay all the rent - Yes! :-))) We love independence

- Earned an advanced degree (this one’s iffy) - This hasn’t happened, and whether it will ever happen is something I’ve been thinking a lot about. I sort of decided half-way through college that I would be totally burned out on school by the time I graduated. But in retrospect it takes way less time to burn out on work than it does to burn out on school, and grad degrees are a different kind of thing. So it’s worth revisiting.’

- Given a best man speech (Sam, this means you have to get married within the next 10 years. Good luck out there.) - Holy shit, Sam, you maniac, you actually did it! Sam got married back in 2019 and I gave his best man speech! It’s another one of my favorite memories :-)

- Gone on a cruise with someone I’m dating - Hmm, not yet. I’ve gone on cool trips, but none on a boat. Maybe that’s something to aim for after the pandemic passes :-)

Retrospective:

1yr: Completed: 5/9

More than half isn’t bad! I’m not gonna worry too much about whether I got these things done within their assigned “time-frame”. I’m a procrastinator in my heart and I don’t see any reason to put that kind of pressure on myself. The point is, they got done. That’s enough for me.

The things I did best in in this category were academic things, and things to do with relationships. I’m proud of the academic achievements, I really feel like doing them has increased my belief in myself and my sense that I’m good at the thing I’ve spent the last four years studying. And of course, I am so happy to be in a loving, fulfilling relationship that brings so many good things into my life. I almost feel like the things I accomplished sort of fell into my lap - of course I’m gonna do programming stuff as a programming student, and getting pets / going on road trips are things I did as a result of my relationship with Meesh. I don’t say that to downplay the accomplishments, but I do think it’s worth noting.

The things I haven’t done are more to do with personal development, which is disappointing. I would like to be able to say, 5 years down the road, that I’ve done the personal development I expected to do in just a single year, but maybe that’s a lot to expect. These are problems I’ve dealt with my whole life. I think what this means is that I can’t expect everything to fall into my lap. Those things are going to take real concerted effort to change. I’m not quite sure how to go about that, though.

2yrs: Completed: 4/6

Two-thirds! Even better!

Lots of these are one-time accomplishments, not so much long-term commitments to personal development. The good news is, I did them, and I think those resulted in some development in their own right :-)

Again, though, the things I didn’t do so well are the things that require long-term, concerted effort. For instance, while I crossed off the one about experimenting with music, it’s really only the initial investment that I’ve really done at this point. It remains to be seen whether I’ll be able to follow through on the commitment to actually experiment and learn.

3yrs: Completed: 4/10

This category also follows the same pattern I’ve noticed with the last two. The other thing I’m noticing is that so, so much of my effort over the past few years has been going towards developing a very particular skill: programming / computer science. Music and art are so important to me, but I’ve done very little real development in those areas. I mean, I’ve done some. But not as much as I would have hoped for half a decade.

5yrs: Completed: 4/10

This is getting a little more fun because less of my goals have to do explicitly with my degree. I’m starting to think beyond college, which is good, because the stage of life I’m in right now requires me to start thinking about the kind of life I want to build now that I’m done with school. Also, I’m at the deadline for this one right now! So this is a particularly interesting category because it really shows where I thought I’d be by this time.

The goals I accomplished in this timeframe are, again, mostly things I’ve done through my relationship, but politics also feature pretty prominently on this part of the list. I spent a lot of time reading and researching political issues during college and really did look for ways to participate. I honestly made politics a pretty big part of my identity over the last 5 years, and I think it will stay that way forever, but I’ve gotten to the point where I think I need to devote less of my mental energy to knowing more. I know what I need to know. It’s time to think about other things.

10yrs: Completed: 4/11 (and counting!)

There’s some career stuff in this section that I’ve been able to do, which is good news. I’ve always been scared about entering the working world. All things told, it’s gone more smoothly than it could have. But I also have lots of lingering doubts about what I want to do in the long term. So one of the most pressing goals I should aim for is to resolve those doubts.

Ultimately, I have a lot of time left, and I’m not even done with this time frame, so I’m not gonna spend much time dissecting the things I haven’t done. What I’ll do instead is say that while I didn’t do everything on this list, I feel proud of the things I have accomplished. I said when I first wrote this list that it’s sometimes hard for me to feel that my life is moving in any particular direction, and I’m still feeling like that five years later, to be honest. But looking back on these things has helped me see that I actually am making progress in my life. Not in all the ways I want to, but that’s OK. There’s still time.

In the next couple days I want to come back to this and reorganize this list into an updated set of goals, for the same time frames. Maybe that will help me think through exactly what it is I want out of the next five-ten years, with the benefit of having analyzed the things that I did and didn’t do well over the previous five.

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be-ca-lm · 4 years ago

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do you have SAD?

happy daylight savings time if you’re in a hellcountry that follows it. extra congratulations if you suffer from SAD, or, seasonal affective disorder, like me!

the darker months and earth’s farthest point from the sun means that our bodies don’t get the right wavelength of sunshine, natural vitamin D, and quality of sleep that we do in the brighter, warmer parts of the year.

so before getting thrown into a spiraling, horrific, near-suicidal depression and social isolation that i do every year, i have taken to PREEMPTIVELY STRIKING at this meteorological affliction of the mind as soon as daylight savings time kicks in and we lose an hour of lifegiving sunlight.

here’s what works for me:

- i invested in this happy light that has full-spectrum wavelength light that our brains respond to in producing happy hormones and chemicals

- i take 1,000 IU vitamin D every single day. this has the most noticeable effect on my physical and mental well-being. a little after taking them, my whole body feels a little warmer and lighter like i’ve been given a giant hug or something

- sleep schedule sleep schedule sleep schedule. i suck at this so much but when i get at least a full 8 hours a night, my mental health improves by leaps and bounds. when i stay up late which i naturally always want to do...i just get sad and start a vicious cycle of tired+sad

- stay active and moving. in the summer months, i don’t need much to get me outside on walks, hikes, activities, but when it’s cold i start getting immobile and this contributes to grogginess and sadness. we need those endorphins! i can’t rely on myself to do yoga at home or even light stretching. i won’t go on a run with only me to motivate myself to go out in the dark or cold. so this time of year, i choose to pay for classes, a gym, yoga, boot camp, whatever strikes my fancy that season because that works for me. if i’ve invested in it, i WILL go. someone else doing the “thinking” part for me and just telling me what to do and how to move my body is 100% worth it to me during this timeframe

- years ago i did the work and spent a good amount of time in therapy to get rid of the constant negative voice and self-talk in my head. i have never gone back to letting it live in my head rent-free, but I know that if it ever creeps back in or gives me issues, i will immediately find a therapist to work on that. i can’t afford to get in the place i was mentally the last time that voice ruled my life. i barely survived. you are worth it. talk to someone, please.

- DRINK WATER. i drink around 3 litres a day, but it gets harder in the cold season because water makes me cold and i hate being cold. it is miserable. SO.....tea! The perfect excuse to drink tea! All day long I drink tea and have a cozy cup to hold in my hands and sip and feel warmed and loved but also classy and sophisticated. i have black teas and chai for the mornings and i have herbal and decaf teas for afternoons and evenings (i’m very caffeine-sensitive and won’t sleep if i drink black tea after 5pm or have chocolate after 7pm). tea is not everyone’s thing, but make sure you’ve done some research and experimenting with different styles and flavors and price ranges before you write it off totally. i keep a stash of herbal teas, peppermint, chamomile, chai, decaf chai, constant comment, earl grey (my fancy loose leaf addiction), oolong, and more. i don’t love green teas, so i skip them. i’m really digging this peach and ginger herbal tea and this double spice chai lately, both of which are cheap brands you can find in a grocery store.

- if you don’t take a multivitamin, now’s the time to start. i take my vitamins with me at breakfast, and what i take has varied throughout the years. a lot of vitamins might be overwhelming if you’re not in the habit, but once it becomes part of your routine, i have seen improvements with adding things like probiotics, fiber, and biotin to my vitamin regimen. if you’re a woman, prenatal vitamins contain a lot of wonderful things like biotin and folic acid that will snatch your hair and nail game without needing to take multiple different pills.

- be extra forgiving with yourself on your period during these months. if you feel hopeless and lost and uncomfortable in your body, a bad period can really intensify these things and we tend to blame ourselves and get frustrated before looking inward and admitting, “oh hey, my hormones are literally at their lowest levels of the month right now. i don’t have to be so hard on myself because this isn’t something psychological that i can fix. it is my body naturally going through a cycle, and my job is to nurture myself with food and water and sleep. in a few days i will not feel this bad as my hormones rebound.”

i believe in you, fellow SAD people! stay hopeful and warm and hydrated. it’s not your fault the earth is orbiting far away from the sun right now.

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let-it-raines · 5 years ago

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Pitching a Tent ⛺️ (1/1)

Emma Swan does not want to go camping. Who even goes camping anymore when things like air conditioning, indoor plumbing, and the internet exist? Why would anybody in their right mind sleep on the ground instead of the softness of a mattress? David says that it’s an adventure, and while she doesn’t believe him those first few hours of trekking through the wilderness, she does once she drunkenly wanders into a British man’s tent in the middle of the night.

Created by the 2 trope game of | wilderness + awkward first meeting |

Rating: Teen (yes, I know, the innuendo in the title is not indicative of this)

A/N: Can I give one big shoutout to @galaxyzxstark for sending me the prompt that created this story but also for literally brightening my day every time I see her tags underneath one of my stories? You are the best! Thank you❤️

And thank you to @captainsjedi for organizing @csseptembersunshine to give me the motivation to finish writing a lot of little things that I’ve been working on☺️

Found on AO3 | Here |

Tag list: @kmomof4 @snowbellewells @tiganasummertree @xellewoods @galaxyzxstark @thejollyroger-writer @idristardis @snowbellewells @karenfrommisthaven @skyewardolicitycloisdelena91 @scientificapricot @captswanis4vr @a-faekindagirl @emmas-storybook @searchingwardrobes @ultimiflos @jamif @dreameronarooftop15 @nikkiemms @resident-of-storybrooke @tiganasummertree @wellhellotragic @bmbbcs4evr @onceuponaprincessworld @jennjenn615 @mayquita @captainsjedi @teamhook @kmomof4 @ekr032-blog-blog @superchocovian @ultraluckycatnd @cs-forlife @andiirivera @qualitycoffeethings @jonirobinson64 @mariakov81

-/-

“Toothbrush, toothpaste, bug spray, sunscreen, sleeping bag, whatever, whatever, whatever.”

Emma runs through the list that David sent her in email after email and text after text. It’s ridiculous. The man puts a ring on Mary Margaret’s left hand and all of the sudden he starts making her highly organized lists and reminding everybody of everything at all times. And by everybody she most definitely means herself and possibly Ruby, but since Ruby is dating Mulan, Mulan usually keeps everything organized for the two of them. So that just leaves Emma to be this mess of a person who is pretty much treated like David’s child instead of his friend.

They have a weird relationship, but it’s fine.

And she really does probably need packing lists sent to her two to three times so that she can make sure to pack everything and have time to buy what’s missing on the list. Or, like she’s done now, she can pack the morning of and be missing everything that she needs that she couldn’t find at the Wal-Mart she went to at three in the morning. Some very interesting people were walking the aisles – and she is including herself in that.

Getting hit on while wearing pajama pants with Santa Claus’s face plastered all of over them is not something she ever thought would happen and will probably never happen again.

But David and Mary Margaret have very oddly decided that they want to go camping as some kind of joint bachelor and bachelorette party, and Emma would much prefer a half-a-day thing where they spend the daylight hours wandering around in nature or canoeing and then sleep in a nice, air-conditioned cabin that has beds and indoor plumbing and a solid roof over their heads. But no, the soon-to-be Nolans have decided that they want to sleep in sleeping bags on the floor of a forest. Supposedly, it’s a beautiful place with a gorgeous lake and human-made campsites carved out, but Emma is not going to believe it until she sees it.

This is what happens when you don’t have parents to take you camping as a kid – you are entirely unprepared to live in nature for a little over forty-eight hours even if you do consider yourself a resourceful person like Emma considers herself to be.

“Dry shampoo,” Emma mumbles to herself, moving from her bedroom to her bathroom and grabbing the bottle before shaking it and spraying it into her hair so that her hair won’t be disgusting tomorrow. She’s going to pull it back into double French braids, but still.

David better be bringing snacks on this trip. She is not going to be able to survive without snacks.

Damn.

Why didn’t she buy pop-tarts when she was at the store this morning?

Probably because she was running away from the weirdos who hit on people wearing Santa Claus pajama pants in May.

Oooh, she needs to pack her pajamas.

(She really does need that list.)

Emma’s phone starts buzzing on her bed, and she lunges over her backpack to check it.

Ruby: Get your ass outside. It’s time to go.

-/-

Okay, okay, okay.

So maybe David and Mary Margaret were right about how gorgeous it is out here. Emma wasn’t sure at first, especially with the three-hour drive that it took to get to the campsite and the hour-hike through some pretty shady (literally and figuratively) woods, but once they got to their destination, she was definitely a little more open to it.

Or a lot open to it.

The air is somehow different out here, fresher and less saturated than the air of the city. There are no traces of gas or garbage or the intense crowding of people. Emma loves living in Boston, loves almost everything about it, but sometimes she can do without the crowds and all of the industrialization of the city. Walking out of the hordes of trees and into the open space of the campsite to see the sunshine sparkling down on a clear blue lake that stretches out over the grounds, ripples moving through the water as fish swim and birds coast in the sky, is now one of her favorite views in the world.

The lack of honking horns and people talking on cell phones is pretty refreshing too.

Emma could, however, do without the bugs that are buzzing around her despite the spray she’s soaked her body in and also do without the possibility of bears and snakes coming out of nowhere to attack her.

The random animals walking around terrify her. Obviously, she’s encroaching on their natural habitat, but this wasn’t exactly her idea, okay?

It’s surprisingly easy to set up camp, even if her tent gives her all kinds of fits that explain why it was under fifty dollars, and after it collapses in on itself for a fifth time, David sighs and sets it up for her. She swears that she is a resourceful person, that she could probably survive a little while in the wilderness, but that might be entirely too optimistic thinking with how the whole tent thing went. Nothing like a camping trip to humble expectations on how she would do if she ever signed up for Survivor.

Is that show even still on the air?

As soon as she gets internet service again, she’s finding out.

“Do you find the whole camping and joint bachelor and bachelorette party thing weird?” Ruby asks her as Emma lays out her sleeping bag, tucking her pillow inside so nothing gets on it during the day.

“I find it all extremely weird,” Emma huffs, twisting her head to look at Ruby who has been far too amused by Emma’s struggles today. “Except for the fact that they want to do this together. Two peas in a pod. I never thought the separate weekend trips were going to work out even though I was really looking forward to going to New York.”

“You and me both,” Ruby sighs, plopping down on Emma’s sleeping bag, ��but I think this could be fun. I mean, ten of us, some beer, and the wilderness. What could go wrong?”

“As someone whose tent fell apart multiple times, I feel like the answer to that is everything. I have lived in Boston my entire life. I was not made for this.”

“You’ll adapt. I know for a fact that Mary Margaret brought things to make s’mores for you.”

“She did not,” Emma gasps, turning to face Ruby before sitting down on the ground too, a rock hitting her ass. Ruby nods, a smile on her face. “Did she really? God, I love Mary Margaret and her resourcefulness.”

“She also brought you hot chocolate.”

“Even better.”

“And I,” Ruby hums, reaching into the inside of her vest to pull out a flask, “brought whiskey and earplugs just in case all of the couples here get ideas that you, our little spinster, are not taking part in. I mean, you could, but I doubt you’d be quite so loud by yourself.”

Emma can’t help but laugh at Ruby and the smirk on her face. Anybody who brings their own flask of whiskey when they know that David, Victor, and Graham have brought an entire cooler full of drinks is a resourceful woman. And Emma can always go for some spiked hot chocolate. Well, not always, but it does sound nice for sitting around the fire tonight.

And the earplugs. She did not think about that. She doesn’t really want to.

“I love you for that.”

Ruby mock gasps, putting the flask back in her pocket before covering her mouth with her hands. “Don’t tell my girlfriend that.”

“Tell me what?” Mulan questions as she pokes her head to the inside of the tent.

“That I love your girlfriend,” Emma chuckles. She stands from the ground and brushes at her ass, the feel of the rock probably going to be imprinted there forever. “Obviously you have a lot to worry about.”

Mulan rolls her eyes. “I think I’ll be fine for about thirty-two different reasons on that front. Do either of you have a bobby pin? I’ve got this piece of hair that won’t stay back, and it’s driving me crazy.”

“I have a couple in my backpack, babe,” Ruby tells Mulan, not bothering to get up from the ground. “In the bag with my toiletries.”

“Thank you. You guys want to go hiking now that things are set up? I think our other option was fishing.”

“Hiking,” Emma and Ruby say at the same time. “Definitely hiking.”

-/-

“Is everyone wearing sunscreen?”

Mary Margaret has asked that question approximately seventeen times today, and while it has been very much appreciated, now that the sun is setting over the lake, everything cast in an orange glow, no one really needs it. At least, Emma doesn’t. What she needs is something to eat that’s not a bag of trail mix, even if that trail mix was really good. She would know. She ate the entire bag when they went hiking earlier, but they were out there all afternoon long.

She needed substance to survive.

(Okay, so she definitely wouldn’t last on Survivor.)

“Yes, Mom,” Emma teases, picking up her water bottle so that she can take another sip. “We have all protected our skin.”

“You say that like I didn’t save that pale skin of yours earlier by handing you my bottle.”

“True, true,” she sighs before getting up from her folding chair so that she can walk toward Mary Margaret and wrap her arm around her shoulder. “Thank you for taking care of me. You’re the best.”

“I also brought you snacks. You probably love me for that too.”

“Oh, I do. I’ve been told of the s’mores and hot chocolate, and let me tell you, I can’t wait. It’s what’s going to make sleeping in the wilderness bearable.”

(That kind of sounded like a pun, but it really wasn’t…and now she’s thinking about bears.)

“I think it’s kind of fun. David and I go camping all of the time.”

“You guys literally stayed in a lodge with a spa the last time you went camping.”

“Semantics.”

“David,” Emma yells as her hip bumps into Mary Margaret to tease her, “when is the food going to be ready? I’m starving.”

“You are not actually starving,” David corrects, looking back at her from the grill that’s set up at the campsite. “You’re just in that state of Emma where you’re always slightly hungry.”

“What can I say? I like food.”

David laughs at her before turning around and flipping the hot dogs on the grill. She doesn’t even like hot dogs, but she can’t wait for these.

The rest of the night idles by, everyone beginning to get a little tipsy on beer or Ruby’s smuggled whiskey – definitely a lot of the smuggled whiskey for Emma – and as the sky completely darkens so that the only sources of light are the clear stars in the sky and the large fire that everyone is sitting around, Emma completely settles into being outside camping. This is actually the kind of thing she could get used to.

It’s definitely the whiskey and the s’mores talking.

Probably more the whiskey than anything, but she knows how to hold her liquor and isn’t that affected by it.

So maybe it’s the chocolate.

She doesn’t know, and it doesn’t really matter. At the end of the day all that matters is that David and Mary Margaret are having a good time. This is their weekend, and to watch Mary Margaret have her head rested on David’s shoulder with content smiles on both of their faces is all that matters.

Emma’s not entirely sure if she believes in true love, especially not with her relationship history, but if anyone has it, it’s David and Mary Margaret.

Or, at least, they have a good love that they both choose to work every day for, and that is probably a better qualification of true love anyways.

Little by little, everyone trickles off into their tents. Graham and Belle are the first to go, followed by Ruby and Mulan, Ruby teasing Emma about using her ear plugs. Emma rolls her eyes at that, but when she goes to her tent, zipping it up so that nothing can get in – which is something she doesn’t even want to think about – she does twist her ear plugs before putting them in her ears so she can’t hear anything else.

Better safe than sorry, right?

-/-

The moment Emma’s eyes open, she notices two things.

Her head is killing her.

She really has to pee.

Like, really has to pee.

And after checking her phone and confirming that it’s only a little past three in the morning, Emma reaches over to grab her boots, stuffing her pajamas pants inside of them, and unzips her tent so that she can go find somewhere to pee.

Definitely not the weirdest thing she’s ever done at three in the morning but also not the most normal.

Victor, for some insane reason, has decided to sleep in a hammock outside, and since she can tell that he is very much awake doing whatever it is Victor Whale does while awake in the middle of the woods in the middle of the night, Emma uses the flashlight on her phone to wander into the woods to try to find a tree to pee behind somewhere Victor can’t see or hear.

If they do this again, they’re going somewhere with bathrooms. Emma is putting it in whatever unwritten rule book there is.

Her head is still pounding, the haze of the whiskey and lack of sleep definitely evident, but Emma manages to find a tree, pee behind it, and start working her way back toward the camp.

Only, which way was the camp? To her left or to her right?

Oh shit. Maybe it was neither left nor right and somewhere in between? What’s in between left and right? Straight? Yeah, definitely straight.

“You can do this,” Emma whispers to herself, giggling a little bit when she realizes that she is actually talking to herself.

Is it possible for Ruby’s whiskey to be spiked? Can alcohol be spiked with…more alcohol?

That’s too confusing to even think about it. Maybe she can’t hold her liquor the way she thought she could.

Left. Right. Straight.

Yeah, straight.

Emma trudges through the woods, having to avoid some limbs that she doesn’t remember avoiding the first time. And when did she even wander this far into the woods to begin with?

Damn Victor and his damn sleeping bag.

After what feels like walking for hours, Emma finally sees the opening of the woods back out into the campsite, and it’s just in time since small droplets of water are beginning to fall from the sky that has her putting her phone away in the waistband of her pants, wishing she hadn’t taken her bra off. It’s also what makes Emma hurry to her tent, quickly unzipping the entrance and stepping inside before zipping it back up and toeing out of her boots, thankful to be in the warm, dry enclosure of her tent, fully ready to go back to sleep before her head can hurt her anymore.

“Who the bloody hell are you?”

Okay, so her head is definitely deteriorating or something because that was a British man, and even if that’s what her GPS is set to sound like because she can’t figure out how to change it back to the default voice, she knows that it’s not what the voice inside of her head sounds like.

And the warm hand that she feels on her shoulder can’t be part of her imagination either.

Shit.

She’s about to die, isn’t she? There’s nothing like being about to die that sobers a person up enough to see that she is very much not alone in this tent, the dark shadows of a man skipping across her vision. And where is all of her stuff?

“Are you okay?” the voice says again, and then suddenly there’s a flash of light, a lantern being turned on, and things start to make so much more sense.

Kind of.

Because a grown ass man with black hair and what she thinks are blue eyes is sitting next to her blinking at her with his brows furrowed together and his lips parted. He’s also not wearing any clothes, but the moment she noticed the firm muscles covered with hair and the particular piece of anatomy that males possess (wow, maybe she’s still a little drunk if she can’t even think the word dick), her eyes glanced back up to his face even as her cheeks warmed.

What is happening?

“Why aren’t you wearing any clothes?” Emma finally says, and the man simply blinks at her again.

“Why are you in my tent?”

“I asked you first.”

Wow. Real mature, Emma.

“You broke into my bloody tent.”

“I’m pretty sure this is my tent,” Emma sighs, and she does not at all watch as the man grabs a pair of boxers and pulls them on. “Or, at least, I thought it was. Is this not my tent?”

“No, lass,” he breathes, continuing to get dressed in jeans and a t-shirt, “I don’t believe it is. Are you drunk?”

“Um,” she hums, reaching up to rub at her eyes just to make sure that she’s not hallucinating, and when her surroundings come back to her, she realizes that she most definitely is not.

This is most definitely not her tent.

Holy shit.

Where even is she?

“Shit,” she mutters aloud, standing up only to hit the wires that are holding the tent up, but none of that matters as she reaches down for her boots and stuffs her feet into them, quickly unzipping the tent and stepping outside only to trip on the entrance and stumble out onto the ground.

Face first.

Into the mud.

Because it’s raining.

She knew that. Of course, she knew that.

“Woah, woah, woah, lass,” the man sighs, his hands reaching under her arms to pick her up off the ground. This could not be any more embarrassing. It simply can’t. “Where do you think you’re going?”

“Back to my camp so I don’t get murdered by the man I apparently just barged in on.”

“I’m not a murderer.”

Emma blinks up at him as the rain pours down on the two of them, the power of it increasing with every second that she stands out here, and she might as well get pneumonia because she’s going to get murdered anyways.

Positive thinking for the win.

“How am I supposed to know that?”

“I guess you’ll have to trust me,” he sighs, a bright smile on his face that she can see under the moonlight. “How do I know that you’re not a murderer? You’re the one who broke into my tent, after all.”

Emma chuckles and starts shaking her head before reaching up to cover her face with her hands. Her entire body is going to be bruised tomorrow. “I’m so, so, so sorry. I don’t – I may be the slightest bit drunk and was in the woods because I needed a place to pee and I didn’t want to do it near my campsite because Victor was sleeping in a freaking hammock outside. I mean, who does that? He’s so weird, and he’s probably getting soaked in this rain right now and I – ”

There’s a tug on her wrist and suddenly she’s being pulled back into the tent of the mystery man, and if she gets murdered tonight, there’s absolutely no reason for her to regret eating four s’mores.

None at all.

(It was five.)

“W-what are you doing?” she hisses, little bumps rising on her arms as a cold chill settles over her.

“Love, as much as I am enjoying your rambling, I don’t enjoy standing in pouring down rain. We were getting drenched out there.”

“I am not your love.”

“Well, maybe if I knew your name, I could call you something else.”

This man is really attractive, and Emma still isn’t entirely sure that she isn’t dreaming.

“Emma Swan.”

The man smiles before reaching back to scratch behind his ear, a half smile on his lips. “Killian Jones at your service, milady. Now, Swan, you were saying something about walking away from your camp? You’re here with other people, aye?”

“My friends for a, like, super weird joint bachelorette and bachelor party.”

“Ah, well, that explains your state of intoxication. Though, I didn’t know that women were now wearing pajama pants with Santa’s face on them to bachelorette parties. That’s a bloody shame.”

“Ha ha,” she murmurs as she rolls her eyes. “Look, bud, these pants are super comfortable and warm except for right now because I’m covered in rain. Can someone even be covered in rain? Is that a thing?”

Thunder crashes down around them, a slow rumbling that’s followed by bright flashes of lightning, and now all Emma can think is that if she doesn’t get murdered, she’s going to die by lightning strike on her walk back to the camp she’s actually supposed to be in.

(Murder, pneumonia, or a lightning strike: the three most common causes of death.)

How does she even get back? Where in the world is she?

Killian clicks his tongue, and her head snaps away from looking at the roof of the tent to looking at him, and all she wants to do is slap the cocky grin off of his face. Or kiss it.

Woah, okay, that’s definitely the whiskey talking. This is not a romantic comedy. She’s not sleeping with the random man that she found in the woods.

Horror movie. It’s a horror movie. Not a romantic comedy.

Get it together, Emma.

“What?” she asks, crossing her arms over her chest and really wishing that she hadn’t taken off her bra because this guy can most definitely see her tits through this shirt. Then again, she saw his dick.

What a weird night.

“Well, I’m thinking about this little predicament we’re in,” Killian sighs, pulling his damp shirt over his head so that she gets a good flash of his abs and the trail of dark hair that dips into his pants before he’s throwing on a sweatshirt over his shoulders and all she can see is the messy shock of dark hair on his head. “First of all, you need to get out of those clothes. I have a flannel shirt and some boxers you can wear. I wish I had something different, but I’m afraid I’m going to need my pajama pants since I’ve soaked my jeans.”

“Yeah, no, I’m fine. I’m leaving as soon as I figure out how to get back to my friends.”

“Stubborn lass,” he mumbles under his breath before digging through his bag and tossing the clothes at her. She catches them, and she’s about to protest once more when he turns around so that he can’t see her. “And you’re not going to get back to your friends tonight. You may as well wait the four hours until the sun rises, but it’s too dark and the rain is too bad for you to find your way back right now. I imagine you can’t be far, probably just across a little patch of woods, but you were obviously pretty drunk and could have wandered for a long time without realizing it. Have you finished changing so I can turn around now?”

“What? Are you a gentleman or something?” she huffs, pulling her wet shirt over her head before sliding the sleeves of the flannel onto her arms and buttoning it up.

Killian looks behind him, his eyes glancing up and down her body before he winks. “I’m always a gentleman, love.”

“Whatever.” Emma finishes changing clothes, balling up her pajamas and putting them in the corner with her boots as another bout of thunder crashes down around them. “Thanks for the clothes. And the shelter and not murdering me or whatever since I did kind of intrude into your tent.”

He turns around with a nod of his head, but instead of replying to her, Killian bends down and starts unzipping his sleeping bag, spreading it out and laying it on the ground. “Now, Swan,” he sighs, “I know you’ve already seen the family jewels, but I need to get out of these pants and need you to turn around. But you may sit down if you like.”

Emma does what he says, turning around before sitting down on the warmth of sleeping bag, and she very pointedly ignores the sound of his zipper being undone and the rustle of clothes being shed. If only she had those earplugs that Ruby gave her. Those would be pretty helpful right now.

Four hours.

Emma is going to be here for four hours until the sun rises, and she is leaving as soon as she can find her way back. And she is not going to sleep no matter how much it is calling to her. She doesn’t sleep over with men she goes home with at bars, and she’s not sleeping in the vicinity of a man who might be a murderer (even though she doesn’t really think that) who could have been out here waiting for someone to stumble into his tent.

Probably not the best plan.

Probably not his plan at all.

The sleeping bag shifts beneath her, and Emma feels the warm heat of a body next to her, and when she turns to the side, Killian has laid out on the blanket, his arms crossed behind his head, and his feet at the ankles. Is he about to go to sleep?

“So, Swan,” Killian starts, his voice as even as it has been this entire time, “you’re a bit of an open book to me, and I can tell that you very much think I’m going to murder you even though I should think that about you. I’ve not heard of many murderers who wait in tents for their victims to come to them. So, I figure we might as well get to know each other since I imagine there will be no going back to sleep involved here.”

Well, that was kind of a creepy reading of the mind.

Emma twists over on her side and mimics Killian’s position, kind of wishing she had a pillow right now too, but beggars can’t be choosers. Wandering in unknown woods while drunk is definitely topping the list of her worst drunk moments over that time that she asked every woman in the bar if they would be willing to braid her hair because her arms had turned into actual noodles…and then she asked everyone if they had noodles for her to eat.

She still kind of hates Ruby and Belle for allowing her to do that instead of taking her home.

“I’m not sure there’s much to know about me,” she finally tells Killian while light flashes outside.

“Nonsense,” he scoffs, hitting his elbow into her. “You seem plenty interesting. I mean, look at how much excitement you’ve already brought into my boring weekend with my mates. Liam could never be this exciting.”

“Who’s Liam?”

“My older brother. He’s in the tent next to us, is probably wondering why the bloody hell I’m talking to myself, and then down the way are Robin and Will. It was Liam’s birthday on Wednesday, and he decided we should go camping this weekend. So, my brother is just as crazy as your friends for wanting to do this. Though, I suspect maybe I’m a little more equip at camping than you are.”

“What the hell gives you that idea?”

“The fact that you are in my tent.”

“True,” she sighs, completely and totally ignoring just how good this guy’s shirt smells. And it’s also really warm. Warm enough that she doesn’t really want to give it up. “What do you do, Killian Jones? And are you British? You sound British.”

“That’s because I am.” Emma twists her head back to the side only to find Killian grinning at her with that cheeky smile and a raised brow that she imagines must be what he does when he’s charming someone. “I’m a writer, actually. I’ve got a couple books out now, nothing big or anything, but it pays the bills. As do the occasional articles I write. It’s…tough, you know, because sometimes my mind doesn’t cooperate and the industry sucks, but I love it. And I’m able to live in your country because of it too, which is a plus since my publishing company is American.”

Okay, so British dude whose tent she invaded is a writer. That’s honestly pretty cool, and she is most definitely going to look up his books when she gets internet back. Not that she’s going to tell him that. He seems to have a bit of an ego even if it is a charming one.

“Well, that’s fancy. Am I going to end up in one of your books?”

“Absolutely. I’m already plotting it in my mind.”

“Of course you are.”

“So, love, what do you do for a living? I need to know as research for my book.”

Emma laughs, twisting a bit on the ground to make herself more comfortable. “I’m a cop.”

“Badass, Swan.”

A little swell of pride swells within her. Damn right she’s badass. “I know. I’m usually not a bumbling drunk idiot crashing tents, believe it or not.”

“Oh, I can tell. You were too flustered for this to be your first time, and you know what they say, you never forget your first.”

“Is that supposed to be an innuendo?”

“Always,” he chuckles, waggling his brows across his forehead, and her stomach does this little weird twisting thing inside of her. “So, tell me about these friends of yours who are celebrating their upcoming nuptials in the woods.”

And that’s exactly how Emma starts weaving the tale of Mary Margaret Blanchard, David Nolan, and the weird, sickeningly sweet, wonderful love story that they have. She most likely gives a little too much detail, which she blames on the lingering effects of the whiskey-s’more hangover, and that tiny underlying fear of what exactly this situation right now involves. Obviously, there are no rules for her life in these odd hours between night and dawn, and when Killian doesn’t tell her to shut up, she takes that as a sign to keep going despite the fact that she has probably never talked this much to someone she has known for under two hours in her entire life.

Sometimes she doesn’t even talk this much to her closest friends.

That does something to her insides, twisting around her heart and either the large or small intestine, but Emma is easily able to ignore it as Killian asks her questions about her friends and shares little snippets of his own, reaffirming what she already knew about the fact that every single person on earth is at least a little bit crazy. If they’re put together in a group, however, the craziness factor multiplies tenfold.

Killian is thirty-two years old, though he says he sometimes feels much older than that, and honestly, she believes it with the way that he talks, all quick wit and flowery words that are laced with innuendo. It might be a British thing. She’s not sure. She’s only ever met one other British person in her life, and that was only for thirty seconds while he asked her how to get downtown.

But this particular Brit is charming and funny and has her laughing so much that her stomach hurts nearly as much as her head is really starting to with the hangover that’s really coming in. He reads, like, all the time, which makes sense for his profession, but he’s also one of those people who does in-depth research for his books by actually going out and doing the activity he’s describing. It sounds a little extra for her, but it’s apparently how he got into both kickboxing and sailing, as well as being able to mix a mean drink, and she can appreciate all of those things.

Kickboxing because she enjoys that, sailing because it seems kind of cool, and a good mixed drink because, well, that one is kind of obvious.

The conversation flows so easily, a natural progression that almost seems false in its genuine state, that Emma doesn’t notice that the rain has stopped pounding down on the tent or that thunder is no longer making her jump every few seconds. And she definitely doesn’t notice that sunlight is beginning to peek through.

But Killian does, and when he brings it up, disappoint washes over her.

Why in the world is she disappointed that she has to go back to her friends? And her clothes. And oh God, her toothbrush. Her breath is probably awful right now.

Her clothes are still soaked through, so Killian insists that she can keep on her measly borrowings from him, and so looking like the most ridiculous person in the world wearing an oversized flannel shirt, boxers, and a pair of hiking boots, Emma steps out of the tent only to come face to face with three other men all sitting around a firepit drinking coffee.

“Damn, Jones,” one of them whistles, “I knew you knew how to pick up women, but doing it out in the middle of the woods is damn impressive.”

“Shut up, Scarlet.”

Ah, she thinks, so that’s the Will she’s been told about.

And the one with blue eyes and curly hair is likely Liam so the one remaining is Robin.

“Lads,” Killian continues, walking toward the fire and grabbing a canister sitting on the griddle before pouring what looks like coffee into a mug, “this is Emma. Emma and her friends are camping somewhere nearby. I’m thinking across that patch of woods since she mentioned a lake. But Emma, here, was a tad bit intoxicated last night – ” At this he hands her the cup of coffee, and she is even more thankful for him “ – and got a bit turned around when she was relieving herself. And then the storm started, so she stayed with me for a bit. Though nothing untoward happened. On my honor.”

Her cheeks heat at that, but she ignores them and takes a sip of the coffee, also ignoring the fact that she probably just burned her tongue and also that there is absolutely no creamer or milk or sugar in this. But caffeine is caffeine, and that’s all that matters.

“Hello,” she croaks out, waving her hand in the air at the three of them. This is about ten thousand times more awkward than barging in on a naked stranger last night. Oh shit, she really did that. “It’s nice to meet all of you. Thanks for the coffee.”

“That’s a nice outfit you’ve got on there,” Liam laughs, shaking his head the slightest bit. “I trust my little brother is telling the truth when it comes to him being a gentleman last night.”

“Younger,” Killian quickly corrects, looking between she and Liam. “I am your younger brother, and yes, as I told you, I was a gentleman.”

“I mean, he was alright,” Emma teases as her eyes squint up at the rising sun. “He didn’t give me his pillow, I saw his dick, and he wouldn’t stop talking, but other than that, he was great.”

Liam, Robin, and Will all break out into laughter that has her shoulders straightening a little bit and her confidence rising as she arches her brow at Killian. He looks both affronted and impressed with his parted lips and raised eyebrows, and that’s exactly what she was going for there.

“I thought you said you were a gentleman, Killian,” Robin laughs. He puts his mug down on the ground and wipes away at his eyes. “How did she see your dick if you were being a gentleman? Were you pitching a tent…inside of your tent? Talk about inception.”

“Alright,” Killian sighs over the laughter of all of his friends – and her too – before he wraps his arm around her shoulder in a touch that very literally might send all of the lightning strikes from last night down her spine, “I think I should probably help Emma find her friends before they start missing her, and I fully expect the lot of you to have cooked breakfast by the time I get back, yeah?”

“You can have some peanuts and whatever you catch in the lake.”

“You’re awfully cheeky for it to be so early in the morning, Will,” Killian sighs, squeezing his hand against her shoulder.

“I got a great night’s sleep last night. Unlike you, obviously, because you look like shit.”

“That’s all on Emma.”

“Hey,” she scoffs in protest even if she knows that it’s true. “You could have gone to sleep.”

“And run the risk of you murdering me? Never.” He cocks a smile at her, one that’s slanted and boyish and probably charms all of the girls Will was teasing him about, before tilting his head back toward the woods. “You ready to go, Swan?”

“Yeah,” Emma sighs, taking one more giant gulp of coffee, “I guess I am.”

With her phone – still without any kind of signal because apparently they are in the most remote place on the planet even though Boston is less than three hours away – and her wet clothes in hand, the two of them start trekking around the perimeter of the woods so that Emma can figure out where in the world her friends are. She knows that she definitely came through the woods, and Killian’s got a pretty good idea of the area now that it’s sunlight outside, so they should be able to find it.

Hopefully.

How far can someone really wander while drunk?

That seems like it’d be a really funny question to google. The answers would be something else.

“So, your friends are interesting,” Emma says, trying to think of some kind of small talk. It’s not awkward walking in the woods, but she can still feel the lingering effects of Killian’s hand on her shoulder and figures talking might make it go away no matter how illogical that is. “Well, friends and brother.”

“They’re a bunch of assholes who I didn’t think would be awake,” Killian sighs, holding up a stray branch for her to walk under, “but I do love them.”

“That’s how all friends are, I think. At least, I think so. If not, we’ve surrounded ourselves with the wrong people. Then again, I kind of think I can be an asshole sometimes, so I probably deserve asshole friends.”

“You? An asshole? Never.”

“I feel like we have not known each other long enough to mess with each other like this.”

“Then what the hell is it you were doing back at my campsite with my friends?”

“Valid point,” Emma laughs before stopping in her tracks to try to see if any of this looks familiar. It all just looks like…wood. And leaves. “Do you know where we are?”

“Aye. We need to keep going straight. I think the rest of the campsites are out on the other side.”

“Whatever you say. I’m still not entire convinced that you’re just leading me into the woods to murder me.”

Killian barks out a laugh, his head thrown back, before he places his hand on the small of Emma’s back and gently guides her forward. “Swan, I promise you that you are going to make it out of this situation alive.” “Whatever you say, Jones.”

They idly chat as twigs and leaves crunch underneath their boots, and even though Emma knows that it’s been at least a fifteen-minute walk (damn, drunk Emma), it surprises her when the two of them walk through a clearing of the woods and the familiar sites of her actual campsite come into play.

Okay, so Killian’s tent doesn’t at all look like hers.

What the hell was she even thinking?

Obviously, she wasn’t.

“This you, love?”

“Yep,” she sighs, looking over at David and Ruby sitting by their firepit with mugs in their hands before turning around to look up at Killian. He’s smiling, that crooked one, and his messy hair has at least two leaves in it. Camping is really not for everyone, and they’ve still got another day of it. Hopefully tonight she won’t wander into a random man’s tent. “This is me. Thanks for not murdering me.”

There’s a subtle shake of his head, those lashes landing against his cheeks, and the smile stays there. “You are ridiculous.”

“You like it.”

“Yeah,” Killian mumbles while his hand reaches up to scratch at his scruff, “I do. You are surprisingly quite the charmer.”

“I don’t think it’s surprising at all.” Killian laughs at her shrug of her shoulders before swaying into her space, the toes of his boots knocking into the toes of hers, and her breath hitches at the touch. “So, thanks for helping me find my way back. I promise I won’t barge into your tent in the middle of the night. Though, you should really think about wearing clothes. Just in case and all.”

“Just in case,” he repeats, and Emma fills a chill run down the back of her spine at the dark tone of his voice. “Or, you know, you could. I don’t think I’d mind. You do have to give me my clothes back.”

Her eyes roll, but her heart flutters all the same. Emma is not the type of girl to meet a guy and immediately hit it off. There are too many things in her past, too many bad relationships that have burned up in flames, but she’s not committing to life here. She may not even be committing to anything at all. It was a weird night, and she might as well let it roll into a weird, wonderful morning.

“I think I’m going to have to keep them.”

“Huh, then maybe I’ll have to stumble into your tent in the middle of the night to get them back.”

“I’ll make sure I’m dressed again in my Santa Claus pajama pants.”

Killian laughs as his head dips so that his lips can tentatively press against hers. He’s as unsure of everything as she is, which makes a hell of a lot of sense considering how weird this situation is, but Emma responds to the kiss, slowly moving her lips against his as her hands move up Killian’s arms, gripping onto the soft material of his sweater as Killian’s hands thread into her hair, familiar and yet entirely unfamiliar shivers covering her body as soft lips move against and with hers.

What a few hours.

What a damn good kisser.

Emma pulls back, not entirely sure what kind of pacing is going on here or what she should do, and she laughs when she remembers that she hasn’t brushed her teeth and probably has awful breath. Then again, so does Killian.

Obviously the height of romance.

“Why are you laughing? I don’t usually have women laugh at me during a kiss.”

“Well, that’s because you’re not kissing women who probably have bad breath and smell like a forest.”

“I wasn’t going to say anything.”

Emma pulls back and slaps his chest, which really only makes Killian waggle his brows across his forehead, the confidence coming off of him in waves.

“You’re a jerk.”

“Only a little.”

“Or at lot.”

“Definitely a lot,” he laughs before kissing her cheek and squeezing her hip. “Do you want to go to dinner with me sometime? Preferably when we’ve both had the opportunity to shower and brush our teeth. A proper getting to know each other.”

“Can we go somewhere with air-conditioning?”

“Absolutely,” he smiles.

“Then yeah,” Emma sighs, pressing up on her toes to kiss Killian’s cheek, “we can go to dinner sometime. You can also come back to get your clothes sometime today.”

“You going to see if you can google me before that?”

“Damn right.”

Emma steps away then, walking backward to the camp and waving Killian away before turning around to walk between the tents where Ruby and David are sitting with their jaws practically on the floor.

“What the hell was that?” David starts.

“Who the hell was that?” Ruby continues.

Sighing, Emma sits down on the folding chair and looks at her friends. “Man do I have a story to tell you guys.”

-/-

Killian and his friends join their group for dinner later that night, but the dinner with brushed teeth and styled hair – plus that ever-important air-conditioning – comes a week later in Boston.

Killian is her date for Mary Margaret and David’s wedding two months later.

Two years later, they get engaged in a tent with Emma wearing her Santa Claus pajama pants and Killian wearing his boxers, but she insists that he takes them off, for authenticity and all.

And the story of how they met most definitely ends up in one of Killian’s books.

It’s a murder mystery.

#pitching a tent #cs fic #cs ff #captain swan fic #csseptembersunshine #captain swan

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rivieraestateshq · 5 years ago

Text

Full Name: Ocean James Samuels

Age: 23

Faceclaim: Nick Robinson

Role: Staff

Occupation: Lifeguard

Residence: Salt Flats - Apartment

Ocean was born and raised on a commune in Ojai, California. Literally - his mother had a midwife and gave birth to all four of her children that way. While the entire family had an appreciation for the arts, as did the entire commune, the Samuels family really thrived in it. Ocean’s mother Skye designs clothes, his father is a graphic designer, and his siblings Sunshine, Forest, and Rain excel at painting and sculpting, music, and dance, respectively. All of them saw their future in the arts, all of them except Ocean, which made him a bit of an odd man out. Sure, he played guitar, but not nearly as well as his brother, and that was about it. Instead Ocean loved science and math, studied it intensely, becoming a favorite among the science teachers at his school for his inquisitive mind and genuine curiosity about the world. Maybe it was because the commune was so earth-centric, but Ocean had always been fascinated by nature, both in an obvious and not so obvious way. While he loved hiking and camping and kayaking, things of that nature, he loved knowing how nature truly functioned at its core. It had been difficult for him to narrow down what he wanted to study in college because of this, and ultimately he had chosen to major in Biology with hopes of becoming a doctor. Sure, his parents would have rather him done something non-traditional like his siblings, but they loved and supported him all the same. Growing up in such a nurturing environment on the commune - where the whole community felt like family - meant Ocean had so much love in his life, and it made him a happy, outgoing person. But it did not prepare him for the harsh reality of the world beyond it.

It wasn’t until Ocean went to college that things change. He went to a college close enough to come home on weekends. But it also gave Ocean his first taste of independence. That was where he met Steven, who would become his first serious boyfriend. From the start, his family and friends didn’t like Steven, and it wasn’t because Ocean was dating a guy - none of them cared about that kind of thing in the slightest. No, it was like they could see Steven for who he really was even if Ocean couldn’t. Eventually though, Ocean would. It wasn’t long before Steven’s controlling nature really made itself apparent. He started dictating how Ocean dressed, encouraging him to go the gym more frequently, chastising him if he showed too much emotion (such as getting too angry or excited or sad about things even if it was warranted), for talking to loud, for talking too much, for being too outgoing, for not being outgoing enough. It was never ending, and nothing Ocean did seemed to please Steven, and the more frustrated his boyfriend became because of this. Little by little, Ocean chipped away pieces of himself like he was one of his sister’s sculptures, and eventually even he no longer saw any trace of the hopeful, optimistic, sunshiny boy who’d left the commune with an adventurer’s heart for discovery. Now all he saw when he looked at himself was a mess, a waste of space, and Steven did nothing to curb these thoughts (and often fueled the fire of Ocean’s despair).

When Ocean graduated college, he no longer thought he was smart enough or compassionate enough or dedicated enough to be a doctor. He was lazy and stupid and cold, or so Steven told him. Nothing could shake Ocean out of his enthrallment with Steven until his family and friends had an intervention for him. At first, nothing was really getting through to him, Ocean not wanting to hear anything they had to say. But then he saw his sister Sunshine cry. His dad cried too, but he did that all the time, never afraid to show emotion. But Sunshine was a rock, always strong and resilient, so when he saw her crying for him, Ocean knew he needed to let Steven go. And he did even though it was devastatingly hard, even though Steven put up a fight, almost literally when he slammed Ocean against a wall, though that was as far as it went. Eventually Ocean changed his number, and everyone on the commune (which Ocean rarely left following graduation) watched out for him because they all still loved him, even if Ocean no longer loved himself.

About six months after dumping Steven, Ocean came to the conclusion that he couldn’t move on in Ojai. He needed to get away, to go somewhere bright and open and free, somewhere far away where he could block everything out. He’d worked his way through college as a lifeguard during summers, so when a position doing that opened up at Riviera Estates, it just felt right. With his parents’ and siblings’ and friends’ blessings, Ocean said goodbye, knowing that leaving was the only way to unpack all the horrible gifts that Steven had given him and figure out just what he wants to do with his life.

@stormyxoceanxblue

#Riviera Estates #ross lynch #Character: Ocean Samuels #taken character #Riviera Estates Bios #Riviera Estates Bio

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bighandslittlefeet · 6 years ago

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Hello Everyone!

So we left Sydney in Val the Van and have been on the road for six days now! It's been marvellous. We’re not sad to see the back of Sydney, serving coffees and running escape rooms can only hold your interest for so long, and I think we packed in all of the good touristy stuff in the first two weeks, so by the end of two months we were definitely hankering for something new! We’re sad to say goodbye to our friends and new work colleagues of course, but the open road beckoned, and on Sunday we set off in a freshly packed Val. We made a short stop for coffee at Four Brothers for Espresso and had a cheeky egg and bacon sarnie and then began the journey properly.

We headed south to go north, hitting up Jervis bay as we had been told by numerous folk that it was truly unmissable. It took us a good five hours to get down, owing to bad traffic on the main highway, it looked to us in passing that a lorry driver had had a serious near miss and was on the side of the road shedding tears to a police officer, meanwhile, we were all diverted down into the valley and onto the b roads. A lot of traffic wound its way through two very picturesque, but very small, seaside towns. Eventually though we made our way out of Sydney and further and further south.

Jervis bay is a nature reserve park with stunning beaches known for their high silica content which keeps them cool and makes them brilliantly white to look at. As we arrived at the park boundary we decided to buy a two day pass, after talking with a really nice park keeper who was sure that the campsites inside the park were a rip off and we’d do much better commuting in and out. So we drove in, the road becoming less and less sealed, further and further, the bush growing more and more tangled and dense. We came to the end of the road. The far end of the peninsula. The furthest beach. We did the obligatory suncreaming and made for the nearest beach. The view was stunning. A sweeping bay with white sands as far as could be seen interspersed with pockets of green and rocky outcroppings encroaching on the shore. We soon realised that this particular edge had quite a lot of rocks and weeds in the amazingly clear water and made our way back to Val, and proceeded to the other side of the headland. This beach, similar in beauty, was replete with a smattering of folks, swimming, eating, sunbathing, and so we felt more comfortable getting out togs off and jumping in. Val came with a full face mask snorkelling kit and two other normal snorkel masks and mouthpieces, so we took the opportunity, as recommended gain by friends, to do a bit of snorkelling. It was chilly water, but gloriously clear. We could see small silvery fish about a handspan in length, and a few jellies here and there. The sand quickly dropped away into the bay and we stuck to the shallows. Later, reading a pamphlet on the beach we would find that we were meant to always face the sea, as sharks were regular guests of the bays! Luckily we were spared any sightings that day!

After a short nap on the sand and a dry off in the early afternoon sunshine we made our way back out of the park. We drove to Hyams beach, another stunner, but the sun was beginning to get low on the horizon and we were starting to get peckish. We made our way to a shop to pick up foodie stuff, the plan was to make a bit of a mexican feast, poached chicken, smoky pepper mole, quac, salsa, blackened corn, and warmed mini tacos. We then made our way over to another site we had identified at bream beach. We couldn’t have done any better, well priced, on the edge of a lake and the people who greeted us were so super friendly. And the kangaroos. They lived on the site. 15 of them, just out of season, so there were some very small young ones! Very cute and very friendly. We watched the sunset with a glass of wine and had leftovers as it was too late to cook.

The next day we headed back into the park. We headed to steamer’s bay, a secluded beach a bit of a hike from the nearest parking spot. It was recommended no swimming, and as we crested the hill we could see why, the beach ran long and shallow and must have had quite a significant drop off as the swell was immense, waves taller than our heads relentlessly crashed onto the beach. We descended the steep staircase into the bay and walked the beaches length and breadth before turning back to the staircase and the walk back to Val. That night we made the feast and ate very well indeed. The next morning we set our sights on hunter valley, a location renowned for its wine and more importantly north of Sydney. We set off and broke the journey for a coffee and a bite in Wollongong, a small seaside town just south of Sydney. A lovely cafe playing Paolo Nutini, served great coffee and a bacon and egg roll - scrambled this time, not fried, and with a nice tomato relish. The BNE as they are called here, seems to the staple of cafes rather than the BLT, as in the UK. I think it is rather excellent. The time in Wollongong was rounded off with a walk up to a lighthouse and along the coast for a little stretch before once again we headed back towards Val. Some of you may know that Becca and I have a collaborative Google map on which we have been bookmarking places to see and go on this trip and we actually had one marked for this town. As we walked back through town to the car park, we passed Chicko’s a fried chicken hut - we couldn’t remember for the life of us why we had tagged it but it looked like it was doing roaring trade. We would have had some had it not been for the lovely food we had just had! And also, fried chicken mid morning seemed a little odd!

Back on the road we blasted the tunes until we climbed the foothills, into the mountains, and finally the valley. An uncanny sense of deja vu took over as it seemed we were transported into the South of France, vineyards and gateways with no fences, lined the route sporadically. Until we hit the towns which were a strange american cultural mix, I could have been in France, although driving on the wrong side of the road! We pulled into the campsite we had booked and set up camp, the temperature was cooler here, and so we shrugged on some jackets and walked across the way to a brewery. We got a tasting platter of local brewed beers, reasoning that tomorrow we could do the wines. We sat and chatted as the sun gto lower and lower in the sky and decided to have a bite to eat at the brewery. A very satisfactory fish and chips and chicken parmo later, and we were contentedly strolling back to camp for a deep sleep.

The next day we did our first campsite wash. The temperature was up so the clothes hung in the sun and were dry in no time. We were soon picked up by our tour which we had booked in Sydney a few weeks ago as a sort of early Christmas treat to ourselves. When in Rome… The tour had been recommended by a friend and was run by a winery/restaurant known as Two Fat Blokes. Julie, our van driver came picked us up at the gates of our site and warned us that today we would be drinking around a bottle and a half of wine each and so had plenty of water on hand - we rubbed our hands with glee. The other couples on the bus were Swiss and American and we picked up a trio of Irish women before making our first wine stop at Leogate. The nine of us sat at a long table outside under a shaded canopy and we were served a flight of 10 or so wines of varying styles and ages. They were all young and fruity and really quite nice. My old world sensibilities have definitely been eroded by this experience. We barreled back into the van, after a few obligatory photos of the vines with the mountains in the background, and began the drive to the next cellar door. Conversation was much more lubricated, thanks I am sure in no small part to the copious quantities of wine just imbibed on near empty stomachs, and we began to chat with the Americans, who turned out to be an Australian and an American who had been dating long distance and were here during their week together. I was asked who my team was, which I had no reply to, until Becca told me he was enquiring about football - at which point I was at even more of a loss. Grasping at straws I related how many people in the UK seemed to be interested in the NFL now, and I myself had picked up a t-shirt at a charity shop which I had been reliably informed was to do with an american sports team, but which I had bought because of its florid tie-dyed aesthetic.

The bus rounded the corner and we were suddenly in a spanish villa. An uncanny sense of deja vu washed over me again, as were were ushered through large oak doors into a high vaulted room. The dude who lead our tasting this time had a very nice pair of DMs on and was a pretty chilled and nice guy. Another flight of wines and we were soon in the van on our way to the two fat blokes pop up restaurant where we had been promised not only nine more wines to taste but also a flight of tasty cheeses to accompany them. The cheese was phenomenal. I’m proud to say the best of the cheese was imported from good ole europe! It was stunning. A real range, and all of them worked very well together on the palate. A new cheese, which I had not had before - a labna, was incredibly creamy and flavoured with a light floral tang. The smoky, the creamy, all went together with the light, the fruity, the well bodied, the red, the white, the rose, and the liqueurs that were placed before us. Placed by, frankly, our alcoholic guide, who admitted to always having at least ten of such and such a bottle on standby, and could happy put away a bottle or two of x and y wines by herself! Much respect. The tasting was made all the more hilarious by the bunch of Irish lasses who had the most amazingly over the top reactions to every cheese we had, it was either ‘the best fucking cheese I have ever tasted, oh my god, Sairosie, have you actually tried this cheese, it's incredible’ to ‘it literally tastes like, and you’ll forgive me for saying this - bird shite’. It was a hoot.

We were the first to be dropped off by the van and we settled into the van quite merrily, making our pre-planned ham and cheese toasties as our designated drunk food. But! These were no ordinary ham and cheese toasties!! As I set about making the roux to form the basis of the cheese sauce, Becca sliced the sourdough breads and began buttering every side. Soon we could begin construction. A doorstop slice of bread, a smear of the cheese sauce, a slice of edam, a few slices of chunky deli ham, a slice of edam, another smear of the mustardy cheese sauce, and finally another double buttered sourdough slice to complete the architectural marvel. Straight to a hot pan, toasted to a golden crisp on both sides, the innards, steaming and goopy. A triumph if we don’t mind saying so ourselves.

The next day we took to the road, bidding goodbye to our strange little campsite in the rolling vines of Hunter Valley. We made a stop at the two wineries we had visited prior to the two fat blokes stop and bought a couple of bottles for Christmas. We then made our way over to Nelson Bay. We spent some time durdling around on a very lovely beach and then made our way up to the headland lighthouse which had stunning views of the bay. We had a spider - an australian coke float, and shared some scones and cream. A questionable variant on the British Cream tea, to be sure. That night we found ourselves in a lovely beachside campsite next to the beach. We tried for another walk but the wind was so strong that it was like being sandblasted. We quickly gave up and turned in as the sun set. That night we found the joys of staying in a powered site, the next day all of our gear was fully charged and the fridge was lovely and cold, now flashing error signs for us as the second battery contended with watery first morning light falling on the solar panel. We set off towards Seal rocks, our next stop, having been recommended a campsite there known as Treachery Camp, by a colleague of Becca’s in Sydney. En route we decided to have lunch at the Rick stein signature restaurant. We hadn’t had any fresh fish yet and we had been looking forward to it down here. So we opted for a fancy meal to treat ourselves. We drank sparkling water on the balcony and ate spiced crab and wonderfully fried fresh fish, and bbq’d king prawns. It was fab!

Soon again we were on the road, barreling along the edge of lakes, and through winding twilight forests. Before we knew what hit us we hit the unsealed road and poor Valerie began to bounce and scream like no-ones business! We slowed to a five km/h crawl and still felt like we were sat on a giant washing machine. After a three kilometre stretch we hit the campsite and found ourselves in the midst of the remains of a festival type hangover. To top it off we were told that they didn’t assign sites we just had to find a spot ourselves. We were a little stressed and found ourselves between some trees - which we soon found out dappled our solar panel! We set out for the beach which was desolate, windy and beautiful. But alas we had no signal and had not expected being without it so couldn’t contact family to let them know we’d be off grid for two days. We didn’t feel like decamping either - only wanting to put Val through that dirt track once more when we left. We made some cracking food though, a very tasty cassoulet, and soon the rabble rousing crowd left and it became a much more young family beach vibe place. We grew more comfortable and relaxed.

We rattled our way back down the unsealed road two mornings later and were soon back on the road towards Port Macquarie. And I’ll leave you with this little tidbit of the next installment - koalas, friends and drinking - oh my.

With Love, Hugs, Spotty Signal and Low Battery Level Power Packs,

Sam and Becca

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sunyoonandstars · 7 years ago

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Hi there~. Can I have a ship with BTS, please?? I’m an honest person and I keep my words. I care others’ feeling and always put them before myself. I love my family very much. I’ll always support everyone who needs, give them my 100%… just don’t betray my trust. Not much confidence. Others usually say that I’m polite, feminine, caring, reliable and fun to tease. Since I don’t talk much, some might get an idea that I’m shy and reserved but I’m actually outgoing (kinda dork 😬), unconscious humming song, clueless sometimes, can be lil bit sassy time to time and clumsy… very often. I love sweets (let’s say all kind of food) flowers and ANIMALS. I can’t resist dogs. Actually I can’t resist most of animals. I just wanna pet them 😆. I’m adventurous, love being outdoor and traveling, enjoy themeparks, hiking, camping, star gazing, festivals etc. You can say, I’ve sweet and girly appearance with a tomboy habit 😂. I prefer walking to driving. I like drawing and enjoy listening to music. I’m scared of some spooky things but also a fan of Horror movies. I’m really slow when it comes to love. There are times I don’t even know that they were flirting with me. So he has to be obviously, consistency and patient with me😅. I always find a man who considered, help people in need without asking or good with kids and animals are attractive. Thank you❤️ Please take your time ~.

Hey there @chana-ninja ! ☺️ Of course, I’ll gladly ship you with one of the members!

And, without doubt, I ship you with our beautiful sunshine Park Jimin! ☺️✨

It was really an obvious choice, at least to me.

First of all: You’re so pretty! ✨💜 And even only judging by your appearance you’d fit really well as a couple.

With both of you being caring, loving, warm and bright souls, you’d make for a perfect match. Also, since Jimin is at his chore still very insecure (which, as I imagine, also applies to [romantic] relationships), your honesty and reliability would be greatly appreciated by him and make it easier for him to trust in you and your relationship. Similar to him, you are very supportive of the people you care about. And Jimin would often desperately need your support even if he might not tell you so. Still, he would also see to it that you’re always well taken care of and sweetly remind you that, even though your tendency to do so is admirable, you should not always put others before you but also take good care of yourself.

Jimin would instantly be drawn to your positive aura and your feminine, gentle and polite nature since he repeatedly stated that his ‘ideal type’ would include all the above traits. It seems, though, that you’re both prone to being teased, so Jungkook would surely have his fun at both of your expenses. But the two of you wouldn’t hold a grudge. Because you’re far too kind.

Jimin wouldn’t mind that you don’t talk that much (at first) or even appear to be shy to the untrained eye. To the contrary. He’d find it endearing and highly relatable (considering that he is practically the same with people he does not know all that well), even more so once he would discover your dorky, sassy side. Also, he’d find your little habits and traits like your subconscious humming along to songs, your occasional cluelessness or your clumsiness incredibly adorable and would never cease to remind you of that fact.

You’d have the sweetest dates going to cat or dog cafés to cuddle cute kittens or puppies together, taking walks or hikes or spending your day off in a theme park, trying all the rides and tasting all the snacks. Because you both LOVE food. He’d spoil you and bring sweets and other snacks whenever he’d come over.

“I’m really slow when it comes to love. There are times I don’t even know that they were flirting with me. So he has to be obviously, consistency and patient with me 😅“

Haha. I don’t think Jimin is even capable of subtle flirting, so you needn’t worry about that. Even before dating he’d be very attentive to you and your needs, always smile that gleaming eye-smile of his for you, laugh whole-heartedly at your jokes, be whiny whenever you wouldn’t give him the attention he’d crave, constantly pay you the sweetest compliments and literally cling to you. Until you’d finally realize that he’s practically already head over heels in love with you. 🙄

“I always find a man who considered, help people in need without asking or good with kids and animals are attractive. “

Well, it seems you have found your man. I don’t believe there are many more out there as considerate and bountiful as Jimin is. As we all know, he also adores animals, especially cats …

And in case you wondered if he’s good with kids … just look at this.

I know, a bunch of pictures doesn’t prove anything. But he definitely does not seem to ‘hate’ them … (Just imagine him as a dad … 🙈😭)

Anyway, I can really see the two of you together. You’d be such a cute and lovely couple. I hope you’re pleased with the result. ☺️💜 Take care! I hope you have a lovely day! 💜

#bts ships #bts ship #i ship you with jimin #park jimin #how is he so perfect #jimin ship #also #you're so pretty #he's so cute #hope you like it #submission

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outhereontheprairie · 5 years ago

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Northern Lights Camp, Turtle Mountains, ND

For me, personally, I find it very difficult to go back and revisit certain places from my past. As with most things when it comes to myself, it’s black and white. Either I love and adore the place (Garrison, ND) or I can’t even face it (almost any place from high school). But on this beautiful day in late September, I got to go back to a place that, even in its dysfunction, was so beautiful to me. It was a place I loved with all my heart. And when I got to return as an adult, I found I loved it even still. Even with the bad memories bombarding me, I walked forward into the golden sunshine and fell back in love with Northern Lights Camp in the Fall.

Let’s go...

Northern Lights camp sits on the shore of Lake Metigoshe in the Turtle Mountains of North Dakota. North Dakota has mountains? Well...no. I mean, for North Dakota they’re mountains! But really they’re just a lot of high hills absolutely smothered in trees and dotted with lakes. And the best time to visit (in my opinion) is always in fall. This is one of those hidden treasures of ND. It’s not notorious like Fargo, or tackled by tourists all summer like Medora. It’s ND’s own, special place where the locals mostly like to go.

Dad and I like to do one day trip (always to explore somewhere abandoned) before it gets snowy. In 2016 it was the Fort Ransom area. Last year it was Arena, ND. This year, we went to the abandoned SRA (where he went to high school) and then headed up to Northern Lights Camp. My dad now works for the church that owns it. And my history with this place? Well, I used to attend this camp in the fall when I was at church boarding school. And it was the highlight of my year. I adored “camp week”, as we called it. Camp week happened just after the first week or two of school started. It marked the beginning of fall and the beginning of getting to truly know everyone at school. I hadn’t been back to Northern Lights (or the Turtle Mountains) for 13 years. It was time.

(below: the boys’ cabins and bathroom)

I can say that, even through the restrictions and rules, Northern Lights always marked a bright place during a very dark time in my life. But coming back as adult was wonderful! No restrictions! I can walk all the trails, I don't have to stay in one spot, I don’t have to stay away from the “pizza hut” (we’ll get to that), and although we didn’t have time to take canoes to Masonic Island, no one was preventing me from doing so. Now, Northern Lights isn’t just a beautiful and quiet place, but a freeing one as well. Let’s walk around!

(Below: boys’ cabins and part of the brand new cafeteria building - they didn’t have that when I went here!)

View from the front of the camp looking at the building that houses the chapel up top and rooms/bathroom/laundry on the bottom. We usually were limited to staying in this open green area when I was here as a teenager, always had to be within sight of staff. Lots of activities and meetings and of course - the beginning of capture the flag happened here!

My favorite sight in camp ever since my first visit - the girls’ chalet and trail down to the lake, through the woods. Only the senior girls got to stay in the chalet! It was a huge treat.

Below: girls’ bathrooms and the little trail up to the girls’ cabins.

Here are the revamped girls’ cabins for grades 9-11. Why weren’t they this nice when I was there!? Our cabins were so ghetto! But we never minded. I can’t say I loved the cobwebs and spiders but I was so excited about camp I didn’t care much.

Looking down the path from the girls’ cabin to the common area of camp.

There was a new swing on this tree I hadn’t seen before! It was fun. Husband and I tried it out. I can only imagine the antics we would have tried on this thing as teenagers - it probably would have been banned for us immediately due to sheer stupidity on our part! But hey, as a teenager you’re invincible!

Back to my favorite view. Honestly, one reason I ended up returning to boarding school my senior year was for all the senior perks. One perk? Getting to stay in the very nice chalet with the other senior girls! Such a treat compared to the moldy, spidery cabins. It doesn’t look like much, but this was luxury to us! It had a bathroom inside and nice warm rooms. No drafts here! It was every bit the treat I was hoping for when I finally got to stay here as a senior with the rest of the girls from my class.

I had to head down this trail, of course. Usually we were forbidden to, back when I was here for camp week.

Into the woods we go!

And the trail goes into a clearing where you can see the meeting building from another angle.

And back down the trail to go past the boathouse and to the lake!

Here we are! Lake Metigoshe!

There’s Masonic Island - so near yet so forbidden to us. A few brave students canoed there and didn’t get caught. They spoke of weird stone alters and structures, but always got spooked and left immediately. Here’s what I could find on Masonic Island online. Anyway, just like most everything else we were forbidden from doing, Masonic Island is harmless and we were probably kept from going there for the main reason we were forbidden from doing anything - they were afraid we would meet up with boys. Can you hear my eyes rolling? Anyway.

The light wasn’t great on this day, it was very harsh and my camera is still on the fritz, but I did my best to capture the place.

Below you can see the boat house and a corner of the meeting building.

Immediately I turned to the trails. I was never allowed to hike the trails and knew it was what I wanted to do when I visited as an adult. So that’s what I did. I was alone. And I set off, marching down the trails looking for my formerly forbidden destination.

It was ridiculously exciting to walk the trails. And I felt deeply sad that I hadn’t been allowed to during camp week. Because the trails are gorgeous and quiet and healing.

Especially in fall, as you can see, these trails are perfect to walk down. Although, as I said, I was doing more of a determined march down them.

There were such pretty views of the lake!

Then I turned to go into the deep woods. I’m surprised I wasn’t worried about getting lost. As I said, I hadn’t been allowed on these trails during camp week (looking back, why would you forbid the students from literally walking in nature when they’re at camp? Well because they could meet up with boys of course!)

But somehow, my internal compass steered me correctly.

I blazed the trails. I felt like I was being drawn to my destination and very much enjoyed the journey!

Just through these trees (below) you could see the sparkling lake.

I tried not to march away from my memories as I went down the trails. I let them come. It was fairly healing, actually.

There was so many sun-dappled paths to explore!

Being from North Dakota, I am fascinated by groups of trees because they are so rare.

All I could hear was my own breath and the crunch of leaves and grass under my feet.

I came to this oak tree and somehow knew I was on the right track, even though I’d never been on the trails before.

I could feel it. I was getting closer.

I reached a clearing and let my instincts guide the way.

Here we are. The Pizza Hut.

A mysterious place I was always forbidden to go during camp week (add that to the long list). Only certain older kids went here. When I was a freshman/sophomore it was the older girls who wouldn’t let me go here (for whatever reason) and when I finally got back as a senior it was older boys and staff (usually male staff). But I was fascinated! Just try to keep me away from something abandoned! I went once as a senior during capture the flag but it was too dark to see much.

So it was the first place I went 13 years later when I got to camp, of course. I marched right down the trails to the Pizza Hut. This is what I had in my mind when I knew we were going to visit. I was finally going to see the Pizza Hut. That place always only reserved for the “right” students or staff, which I never seemed to be one of. Now, I was finally here. You may think, what’s the big deal? Well, for one thing it’s a mysterious abandoned tower-like structure in the woods. And I’ve always been obsessed with abandoned places. For another, I’d heard of it ever since I was a freshman and had always been kept from it. When you are restricted in every way, shape, and form, often for no reason or just ridiculous reasons, you want to break those restrictions. Even if you’ve had to wait years into the future to do it. I wish I could put it into better words but sometimes you just have to walk in a boarding school student’s shoes to understand.

Before I left, I asked one of dad’s friends (and a longtime camp caretaker) what the Pizza Hut was all about. Here’s the scoop!

It was a weather research station way back in the day.

Then they stored the old pizza ovens from SRA here, and there they remain to this day.

There are giant water tanks in the basement, too. They were supposed to supply water to the camp but that never happened.

Basically, a lot of ideas went into this place that never got completed. And now it’s boarded up and it’s a climbing wall for campers.

Now I know! And now you do, too.

Back down the trails I went, this time to find my people. I had accomplished one goal - I saw the Pizza Hut. Later I took dad back there. He was interested too. But we couldn’t find a way inside - bummer.

I found my husband exploring on his own and told him a few camp stories. He asked about the trails on the boys’ side of camp. And I told him it was the boys’ side - I was absolutely forbidden to go near that side of camp. He snorted and said, “What is camp for if you can’t do half the stuff!?” I told him it didn’t matter at the time. Not much, anyway. Camp week was freedom compared to the rest of the school year. He just shook his head. But it’s true. It was, as sad as that is.

We met up with dad who was excited to show us some trails he worked on earlier in the year when he was at camp helping out. And they just so happened to be on the boys’ side of camp! Scandalous.

What was interesting to me was dad’s experience as an academy camper here vs. mine. He could go anywhere and do anything including kissing a girl in the bushes and not get in trouble! I can not tell you the hell I would have caught had I been found in the same situation.

He kept saying things like, “I bet when you were here you guys would run off into the woods too!” or he’d ask me if I’d been on this trail or that. No. We weren’t allowed. I said it over and over again. He seemed mystified by that. His experience was so opposite. Was it because he is a male and I am female? Probably. Because it was the 70s vs. the early 2000s? Maybe. A totally different staff? Possibly. I may never know.

Below: a page from my dad’s 1975 school yearbook - they loved camp week back then just as much as we did!

I asked dad about these old wagon wheels and parts around camp and he said somewhere along the way someone dumped them around camp to lend a “rustic” touch.

It was exciting to go on more trails I had never seen, and again I felt sad that we were forbidden from going on these trails. Because they’re so pretty! Whereas the trails on the girls’ side meander over the hillside overlooking the lake, the boys are in the deep, deep woods and have swampland dotted throughout.

And because of that, there were so many mushrooms we found!

I was delighted. I had never seen the classic red capped mushrooms with white bases before in ND!

Usually I just see mushrooms like these big, soggy guys on this tree (below) or the typical white mushrooms.

Dad helped me get shots of these by pulling the grass and leaves away from the mushrooms. We were charmed.

We reached a swampy clearing and found what dad wanted to show us.

A big rope swing in the middle of the woods! How fun is that!?

Dad hopped right on and told my husband to push him. LOL!

So he did! Then husband took a turn trying to climb the rope swing. I was too busy photographing mushrooms to try it. That’s pretty typical of me!

I got the shot! Isn’t it beautiful? Nature is amazing.

We ended our time standing by a place on the boys’ trails overlooking a bit of the lake.

Dad shared his camp week memories. Told us the story of him kissing a girl in the bushes. I was scandalized. Husband thinks we are all weird.

I shared stories of the highlight of camp week - capture of the flag.

It was always boys against girls (of course) and always late at night. We started at the flagpole on the green by the cafeteria. If you were an underclassman (especially freshman) you were usually made to guard the line. It was always the older and athletic kids who got to go deep into the woods on trails and hide and guard the flag. And staff did play with us - mostly the male staff. The female staff tended to sit on the steps of the cafeteria, the light from the windows spilling over them, sitting and sipping hot drinks and watching us play. When I was a freshman/sophomore I was a) an underclassmen and b) nowhere near athletic (I cried through PE class). I was relegated to being ignored or told to guard the line. When I came back as a senior I had more say but was still terribly not athletic and by that point didn’t care as much. I had more of a run of the girls’ trails. Do I remember who won? I think the boys usually did. The male staff usually went on the girls’ team because the boys’ took it so dead seriously. As in, they were ready to fight you to the death over their flag. Ridiculous - but then again, I’m not a terribly competitive person.

The part of capture the flag I always liked was painting my face. Just with whatever makeup we had, I think. Not all girls did it, and usually it was just a few smudges on the cheeks. In fact, I’m not even sure when the trend started. But I took it to new heights. I may have been useless athletically but never artistically! So I would paint super elaborate designs all over my face with eyeliner (I think they usually looked like spider webs - I have photos somewhere) and usually a few other girls wanted me to help with their’s, too. I was happy to help. There’s a place for most people in some parts of capture the flag, I guess!

I look around this place and I see the sheer beauty I saw before, as a teenager, and I understand why I adored it so much despite everything. I loved the cold mornings. The camp food. Dipping toes in the freezing lake. Painting our faces for capture the flag. Sure, as an adult I see the glaring dysfunction. But then? I just saw the leaves starting to turn and the lake sparkling thought trees. And it was good.

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#Northern Lights Camp #Turtle Mountains #North Dakota #fall #autumn #woods #Lake Metigoshe

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caslikescoffeeandfreckles · 8 years ago

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219, for the prompt list! :) alsooo, I was wondering if I could be added to the tagged list?? or tagged for when you post new ones? They are honestly amazing and I love your writing!

Prompt #219: “I didn’t ask for any of this! But do you know why I put up with it all? Because I love you!”

I changed the wording a bit because it was a little too overdramatic for the scenario. Also, sorry for taking so long to write this! I tried to make it up to you by making it longer :)

Let it be known that Castiel Novak is a pain in Dean Winchester’s ass.

But he’s also the kindest, smartest, greatest person Dean knows — and the hottest to boot — and Dean is a good boyfriend so he doesn’t even hesitate when Cas asks him along on a nature excursion.

Which is why he’s awake at the ass crack of dawn on a fucking Saturday freezing his balls off with Cas’s weird tree-hugger club.

Cas shivers next to him and bounces back and forth. “Aren’t you excited?” he asks, a suspicious amount of cheer in his voice for someone who once threatened to break all the windows in Dean’s car for waking him before 10 a.m.

Dean works up the fakest smile in his repertoire. “Can’t wait, babe.”

Cas sidles up closer to Dean’s side, burrowing his cold nose into Dean’s neck. Dean tenses until he feels Cas’s nose slip higher until his lips brush his ear. “I can’t wait to be up there with you,” Cas breathes and it may be 5 a.m. but Cas’s deep voice still gets Dean’s blood pumping. “Hiking, star gazing, sitting by the fire.”

Getting eaten alive by bugs, shitting in the woods, waking up with crippling back pains from sleeping on the fucking ground, Dean thinks sourly.

But Cas is still snuggling him and his voice is so warm and happy so Dean just hums and dips to press a kiss just at the edge of Cas’s beanie. “Sounds wonderful.”

The bus arrives ten minutes later and Dean nearly cries with relief. He steals a seat in the very back for him and Cas and there’s a vent right above them blowing warm air on their numb faces. Dean tips his face us and sighs.

He can feel Cas laugh at him and he scoots closer on the seat. “Don’t worry; it’ll be a lot warmer by the time we get to the park.”

It’s a nine-hour drive to the Rocky Mountain National Park. They only stop four times for food and/or bathroom breaks and Dean spends every second in between stops either making out with Cas or clinging to the small 21st Century luxuries he’s about to be robbed of for three days.

They get to their drop off and Dean wants to sob as he watches the bus drive away. But Cas takes his hand with an energetic squeeze and Dean returns the pressure with a wistful smile.

He can do this. He can rough it for three days if it means seeing Cas this happy.

But his resolve is already crumbling three hours up the damn mountain. He was complaining about freezing before but now he feels like he’s walking toward the gates of hell. Sweat is soaking through his clothes and burning his eyes. He can taste the salt every time he licks his dry lips because he’s fucking thirsty but refuses to drink too much because he hates pissing outside. Just because having a penis makes it easier doesn’t mean he likes whipping it out for all the squirrels and butterflies to see, okay? He can’t help but toss the women of the club some sympathetic glances.

But Cas looks so in his element. He takes turns walking at the front of the group with their guide and lagging behind with Dean, which Dean feels a little bad about until Cas starts rambling about plants, ones that can be eaten and those you should avoid. He talks about insects and Dean tries not to cringe every time Cas finds one and holds it up for Dean to see.

Dean points out a beehive at one point and Cas squeals, pulling out his camera to take photos from a respectable distance and talks Dean’s ear off for another half hour about bee colonies. Dean smiles and takes Cas’s hand.

They stop about two hours before sunset to create a camp. Dean volunteers to set up the tents because that’s at least one thing he knows he’s good at and Cas goes off with a few others to gather firewood.

They end up seated next to each other around the fire eating some weird packaged gunk.

Dean only has to suffer through three bites before Cas slips him a bag of trail mix and Dean stares at him in awe.

“You’re a literal angel,” he declares.

Cas rolls his eyes and holds his hand out and Dean pours some of the trail mix into his palm. “You holding up okay?” Cas asks as he picks out the raisins.

Dean takes them and tosses a handful into his mouth. “Of course,” he says between crunches. “Doing great.”

“Tomorrow night is supposed to be clearer so I think we should go stargazing then.”

Dean wants to grimace. Stargazing. Aka freezing your ass off away from the warm fire; just the two of them laying on the cold, dirty ground, vulnerable on the mountain at night with the fucking bears and probably like wolverines or some shit.

But the fire catches Cas’s eyes as he starts rambling off all the constellations they’ll be able to see more clearly than in the city and he makes a joke about Dean’s freckles and all Dean can do is smile back.

“I can’t wait, Cas.”

Cas’s smile softens before he rests his head on Dean’s shoulder.

And it’s nice.

Dean has the cool mountain air at his back, a hot fire at his front, and Cas’s warmth at his side and he takes a deep breath through his nose and lays his head over Cas’s.

I can do this, he thinks again.

Tomorrow will be better because at least he knows what to expect.

You poor naive bastard, he thinks in the morning.

Everything hurts. Like everything.

His back, his legs, his feet, his neck, his shoulders, his throat, his fucking bladder because he hasn’t peed in like twelve hours.

He lies perfectly still on his back in the tent. He’s pretty sure he has some Advil in his backpack. It probably won’t help a ton but it’s something. The problem is he can’t fucking get to it because it hurts to just breathe and Cas is already gone; Dean can hear him outside the tent with the rest of the troupe.

He knows he should call for help. He knows. But he fucking can’t. Like what the fuck is he supposed to say? Cas, I can’t move my entire body and my bladder is straight about to explode?

No thanks. He’d rather die with dignity.

What if I die and piss myself?

Fuck.

He’s trying to muster the energy to make a move when the tent door unzips and Cas crawls in, smile bright and sunny and Dean kinda wants to kick him for it.

“Morning, sunshine,” Cas greets as he continues his journey up Dean’s body until he’s straddling the paralyzed man. “Sleep well?”

Dean can only grunt a response. Cas apparently doesn’t find it odd because his eyes kinda go cloudy and he’s leaning down, lips parted.

Fuck, fuck, fuck.

He kisses Dean’s throat, lets his soft lips skirt across Dean’s skin. Dean clenches against the pleasure, trying to get the strength to say something. Then Cas’s hand is wandering down his chest and stomach and it incites a hiss from Dean. He can feel Cas’s lips smile against his neck before Cas starts nibbling and it makes Dean’s body go lax for a hot second as Cas’s hand drifts lower before- NOPE.

Dean lurches up, throwing Cas off him and every muscle in his body screams. He keeps moving though, using the momentum to tumble toward the door.

“Dean?” Cas asks, sounding offended. “What the-?”

“Sorry,” Dean almost yells. “But I- I gotta go. Gotta go. Oh my jesus fucking christ.” It’s like the pressure is increasing the more he moves and he trips out of the tent door and away from the camp without his shoes.

Cas tries to talk to him when he returns but Dean can’t. He just can’t. So he starts taking the tents down instead and the awkward moment is forgotten in their rush to get continue their hike.

It’s hell. Absolute fucking hell.

Dean’s thighs are burning like he’s straddling the fucking sun and he feels even nastier than yesterday with all the sweat and the fucking bugs that keep flying into his face.

And of course no one else in the damn group seems to be affected. Oh no, they’re just having a grand ole time talking about the fucking trees and their favorite hiking trails back home.

Like these fuckers do this shit for fun. Regularly. What the fuck?

“Do you think we’ll see any of the wildlife?” some chick named Hannah asks.

“Oh yeah, don’t the bighorn sheep give birth in the spring?” Alfie wonders. “That would be amazing to see!”

“The elk would be cool.”

“Or bears,” someone pipes in.

Dean’s head snaps up. “Bears?” He looks to Cas. “Bears?”

Cas smiles like Dean’s just being cute and takes his hand. “Don’t worry, Dean. I’ll fend off any bears that come toward you.”

Bears turns out to be the least of Dean’s worries that day because in the next few meters Dean manages to rip his pants on a bush.

Then Cas finds a giant ass spider in his hair and Dean takes off so suddenly he runs into a tree.

He falls in a stream while refilling their water bottles and has to hike is soggy boots that squelch with every tired step.

By 2:00 Dean is praying to get mauled by a bear.

Instead he steps in a pile of shit and that’s fucking it.

“MOTHERFUCKER!”

His roar echoes through range and everyone in their group turns to him.

“Oh my fucking- this stupid fucking son of a-”

“Dean, it’s all right,” Cas tries to tell him.

“No it’s not!” Dean screams. “This is so fucking typical! I can’t fucking believe it this is such fucking bullshit what the fuck was I thinking letting you bring me here?”

Cas’s shoulders tense. “Excuse me?”

“Maybe we should give them some space,” Alfie suggests and the rest of the group sneaks away.

“Why are you so angry?” Cas demands. “It’s a simple accident, Dean, it’s not that big of a deal.”

“Because there’s shit on my shoe, Cas!” Dean points at it for emphasis. “And my feet are soaking wet and they hurt and I’m tired and I haven’t pissed since this morning and I’m fucking hungry because I can’t eat that disgusting goo you guys try to call food and I fucking hate this! Goddammit!”

“You said you liked camping!”

“I said I used to go camping. When I was a kid. Like I was forced to go with my fucking dad. I hate this shit, Cas! I fucking hate it! Everything is gross and dirty and you have shit outside! It’s the worst!”

“Then why did you even come?” Cas yells.

“Because it makes you happy! The only reason I put up with any of this shit is because I love you!”

Dean’s voice carries again and they can feel the leaves tremble. Just like that, Cas’s angry face is replaced with something surprised and... touched? He looks soft and happy and it nearly gives Dean whiplash.

He can’t figure out why they’re not fighting anymore when Cas gives him this look from under his lashes.

“Love?”

Dean blinks. “What?”

Cas takes a couple steps toward him, smile getting broader. “You said love.”

“I-” Dean gasps as his own words circle his brain. Shit. “Cas, I-”

But Cas’s hand is there suddenly, covering his mouth. “Please stop talking,” Cas whispers and Dean can only nod as his heart beats wildly in his throat. Cas’s hand drops to encircle Dean’s wrist and he squeezes. “I love you too.”

Dean swoops in to kiss Cas, arms snapping around his waist to pull him close and Cas is just as excited for it. His hands slide through Dean’s hair, holding his head in place as Cas deepens the kiss and steals Dean’s breath.

And it’s fucking amazing.

Absolutely perfect.

Until Dean sways a little and they hear the disgusting squelch of his boot.

Dean pulls away, beat red. “Oh my god.”

Cas only laughs. “We should really clean your shoes.”

Dean drops his head to Cas’s shoulder. “I don’t think I can do this anymore, Cas.”

“Yes you can,” Cas promises as he strokes Dean’s hair. “Because when we get home, I’m going to make it up to you. We’re going to take a long shower and I’m going to order enough take out to feed us for a month, we’re going to sleep and then I’m going to-” He leans in to whisper in Dean’s ear and it somehow make Dean redder.

He nods furiously as Cas steps away with a sly smile, beckoning Dean to follow. “O-okay. Y-yeah, that sounds fair.”

#lightwooddanvers #asks #this is a disaster omg im so sorry #destiel #deancas #drabble #au #college au #established relationship #hiking au #??#mine

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weownthenitenyc · 6 years ago

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Start planning your summer getaway with some of the best festival experiences for 2019

Whether it’s discovering new underground acts or indulging a travel buzz, music fans demand an extraordinary experience from festivals these days. A festival no longer means piling into a field for a weekend and accepting the meager facilities on offer. More often it’s a wallet-friendly trip to a different country, to combine music with local culture, nightlife, sightseeing, and gastronomic delights. From partying in a 17th-century Balkan fortress or an Icelandic glacier, to pool parties, beach raves or lakeside gigs, there’s something here for everyone.

SEA STAR FESTIVAL – SUPERSTAR DJs AND MEDITERRANEAN POOL PARTIES IN CROATIA

May 24-25 | seastarfestival.com

Acts Announced: Sven Vath, Nina Kraviz, IAMDDB, Illario Alicante, Enrico Sangiuliano, Petar Dundov live, Vojko V, Krankšvester, High5, Fox, DJ Jock, Lawrence Klein, Unique, Hazze, Buntai, Smoke Mardeljano

Sea Star is another coastal dance extravaganza hatched by the experts behind EXIT, so it’s no surprise that it’s been nominated in the Best Medium Sized Festival category in this year’s European Festival Awards – less than two years after its first edition (it was also nominated for Best New Festival last year). Sea Star will return this year to the idyllic Stella Maris lagoon in Umag, Croatia on May 24 and 25, with special opening and closing parties on the 23rd and 26th. With over 70 artists on six stages, from local Balkan heroes to international superstars, Sea Star is an event with high production values in a stunning Mediterranean paradise. And if you need a time-out from dancing, Umag’s historical Baroque and Renaissance buildings and winding streets are a hive of quaint bars and restaurants. Still, it won’t be long before you’re drawn back to the lagoon with that 4/4 pulse nearby… Sea Star festival takes place from May 24-25, with an opening party on May 23 and a closing party on May 26.

SECRET SOLSTICE – GLACIER RAVES AND SURREAL MIDNIGHT SUN IN ICELAND

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June 21-24 | secretsolstice.is

Secret Solstice is all about unique experiences – the most obvious being the fact that the sun doesn’t set for the whole 96 hours, so get used to midnight pool parties in bright sunshine. As well as an eclectic line-up of US, European and local acts, Iceland’s premiere music festival is a bucket list party in the capital Reykjavik during the magical summer solstice. The carbon-neutral festival prides itself on using Iceland’s stunning natural spaces and rugged landscape as a backdrop – while the main stage hosts many of the blockbuster acts, you can literally have an underground vibe, at exclusive raves in a glacier and a 5,000-year-old lava tunnel. Back above ground, catch DJ sets in naturally heated lagoons or at boat parties in the midnight sunshine – and marvel at glistening waterfalls, black sand beaches, caves and vast volcanic fields on special day trips. Secret Solstice is celebrating its fifth anniversary, and 2019 is set to be its biggest edition yet.

EXIT FESTIVAL – PARTY IN A 17th CENTURY FORTRESS OVERLOOKING THE DANUBE IN SERBIA

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July 4-7 | exitfest.org

For four days every summer, the 17th century Petrovaradin Fortress opens its gates for EXIT – the award-winning music festival in Serbia’s second city, Novi Sad. EXIT began in 2000 as a student protest fighting for political change, and over the years it’s grown into one of Europe’s biggest festivals, with [thousands] partying in the stunning citadel perched high on a cliff overlooking the River Danube. The positive activism remains in the air, and each year has a specific theme (it was ‘Freedom’ in 2018). EXIT has possibly the most diverse line-up of any European festival, with 20 outdoor stages that feature everything from death metal to pop, indie, reggae, and techno – among cobbled paths, courtyards, grass verges, ramparts and underground tunnels. The Dance Arena is the festival’s energetic hub, with 20,000 raving in the fortress moat waiting for the awe-inspiring moment when the sun rises above the ancient walls. Many DJs say the Dance Arena is the greatest place in the world to play, and after Nina Kraviz closed EXIT 2018 with an extended set until 9am, she called it “one of the most special places on Earth.”

DOWN THE RABBIT HOLE – WHERE YOU ARE WHO YOU ARE WHEN NO ONE CAN SEE YOU

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July 5 – 7 July | rabbitresort.nl

Down The Rabbit Hole says adventure, confusion, surrealism and psychedelics, which has been an inspiration for (psycho) rockers, DJs, artists, designers, and filmmakers ever since the rise of the pop culture in the uncurbed 1960s… Good company, so get ready to tumble! We have all the time in the world, there’s no rush. Take your time to dine in dozens of restaurants from all corners of the earth, go meditate in the forest, lie down in the green pasture, swim for a bit, strum by the campfire, discover hidden discos… Have a ball with brand-new bands or finally see that classic artist in full swing. We’re out and we’re loose! Build your own party and celebrate, enjoy what you do, all with an open mind and in a sustainable way: we’ll keep it green & clean. A trip to Down The Rabbit Hole is a perfect summer getaway! Bring your own camping gear or rent luxurious accommodations at our Rabbit Resort at Groene Heuvels – Beuningen (near Nijmegen).

OFF FESTIVAL – A VOYAGE OF UNDERGROUND DISCOVERY IN POLAND

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August 2-4 | off-festival.pl

OFF is a unique boutique festival that values experimentation and diversity above everything else – with founder and organizer Artur Rojek’s hands-on vision an inspiration to ambitious promoters and dreamers worldwide. OFF takes place in ‘Valley of Three Ponds’, Katowice – a beautiful green hideaway in the industrial Silesia region, with a huge choice of bars, restaurants, and cultural centers to explore in the city close by. OFF ignores popular trends in favor of an expertly curated programme of esteemed artists – with the festival bringing many acts to Poland for the first time. It was created in 2006 as a way for Rojek to indulge his “dreams and passion for sharing music”, even if that means a black metal band can play next to a techno DJ, a post-punk act, avant-garde noise-rock, hip-hop, jazz, post-rock and beyond. From the greatest international underground heroes to essential forward-thinking Polish artists, OFF is an inspirational meeting of minds.

LOWLANDS – MUSIC, ART AND CULTURE CLASH AT THE DUTCH CAMPING PARADISE

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August 16-18 | lowlands.nl

A Campingflight to Lowlands Paradise is the Netherlands’ most prestigious music festival that’s been a rite of passage for the Dutch since 1993. It takes place in rural Biddinghuizen – only an hour away from Amsterdam, so there’s even a chance to add in a city break either side. It’s a true music, arts and culture weekender, featuring the world’s biggest headliners on the circuit, as well as installations, theatre, comedy, film, debates and even science workshops. Each of the uniquely designed stages are covered so you can party rain or shine, and the iconic ‘Armadillo’ area is the festival’s power station, quirky bars, DJ booths and artisan restaurant areas that surpass regular festival food stalls. The Dutch are world-renowned as expert festival organisers, and Lowlands is a perfect smooth operator, from the intuitive layout to the lack of queues for bars, food and bathrooms – with the best campsite facilities of all the big European festivals. It’s a proper lost weekend too – Lowlands doesn’t do day tickets, so once you arrive on the Thursday you’re on a journey with your fellow happy campers until Sunday. This vibe was picked up by 2018 headliner Nile Rodgers, who posted: “Lowlands was fire! This was an amazing f-ing crowd! Truly insane, and that’s how we like it!”

SEA DANCE FESTIVAL – PARTY ON THE STUNNING ADRIATIC COAST IN MONTENEGRO

August TBA | seadancefestival.me

Acts announced: David Guetta, Robin Schulz, Ofenbach, + many more coming soon

Sea Dance in Montenegro is an extension of the EXIT family – a gold standard guarantee in the festival world. Like EXIT, Sea Dance is also an award-winner, and was voted Best Medium-Sized Festival at the European Festival Awards after its first edition in 2014. The festival bottles some of the magic of EXIT’s dance stages and transports it to the alluring golden sand beach of Budva on the Adriatic coast, with narrow medieval streets just a short walk away. EXIT’s famous No Sleep Novi Sad stage is repackaged for Sea Dance, with over 100 performers shared around numerous other stages. Evan as a relatively new addition to the festival scene, Sea Dance already has reputation for securing the biggest names in electronic music. Montenegro was recently listed by Skyscanner as the number one cheap holiday destination, with mountain biking, hiking and watersports available for those with energy left after dancing all night to the world’s biggest DJs.

AMSTERDAM DANCE EVENT – IMMERSE YOURSELF IN ELECTRONIC MUSIC CULTURE

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October 16 – 20 | amsterdam-dance-event.nl Acts to be announced soon

Amsterdam is world famous as a hub for nightlife and electronic music, and every October it becomes the centre of the electronic music universe for five days during the Amsterdam Dance Event (ADE). Some 400,000 people hit the Dutch capital every year for ADE, which features more than 2,500 international artists performing in over 100 of Amsterdam’s most iconic venues including Melkweg, Gashouder, Claire, Shelter, Paradiso, the NDSM Docklands and De School. But it’s not simply a five-day rave – ADE offers an inspirational conference programme that covers all aspects of dance music culture and the industry. By day, across Amsterdam’s five main districts, there are dozens of seminars, workshops, exhibitions, artist interviews, feature and documentary screenings, DJ showcases and tech classes. Amsterdam Dance Event takes place over five days every October and is the ultimate festival for electronic music fans, who can even learn more about the culture between the parties.

Festival Guide 2019: Start planning your summer getaway with some of the best festival experiences for 2019 Start planning your summer getaway with some of the best festival experiences for 2019

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