#this is a disaster omg im so sorry
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nandermoenthusiast · 8 months ago
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oh my god i got so emotional SHUT UUUUUP
#911#911verse#evan buckley#so this is what crying about a character is actually like#like i do be crying at times dont get me wrong#but i just love buck so much. i kept stopping the episode and going. omg omg omg#omg its happening. omg idk if i can actually watch this. omg its happening !!!!!!!!!!!#jesus christ JESUS CHRIST#like i know we throw the word around a lot but this is MY SON#and everything that happened in the episode. it was like it was happening to me#i felt actual physical damage and actual butterflies as the kiss moment approached#like theY DID THAT#THEY MADE MY BI SON CANONICALLY BI#idk to have this shift in a characters perception this late in a procedural….. 911 you gods#i really hope they can somehow make more seasons cause they would deserve ti#it. and like. this doesn’t have to be the end of buddie??#they could get them together at any time bc buck realizing hes into men is a lot other worm can than buck realizing hes in love with#his best friend. i just dont know how they would do it with eddie bc they would have to pull a lot of focus over there too with a big#chance of feeling repetitive with their narratives#maybe they just show them together after a timejump and say they worked some stuff out idk lmao#ANYWAY I AM STILL CRYING BECAUSE BUCK MY SON IS A CANONICAL BISEXUAL JEALOUS DISASTER JUST LIKE HIS MAMA ❤️#THIS IS WHAT REPRESENTATION IS ACTUALLY ALL ABOUT (and i mean his horrifying handling of the feelings of being left out of course lmao)#THE LOOK EDDIE SHOT HIM TOO#i am too frazzled rn i just need to scream i think#hi. im sorry this is me coming out of the 911 closet now that wwdits is on hiatus#evan buckley!!!!!#SON OF MY SONS#LIGHT OF MY LIFE#APPLE OF MY EYE
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jeromefart · 2 years ago
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added jerome to tomodachi life i cant wait to torture him with frilly pink dresses and latex body suits
also i should probably keep this in the tags bc it’s embarrassing but who cares anyway when i play tomodachi life my brain likes to connect every event into this crazy plot and i map out all the characters daily routines and i treat them like theyre in a little tv show or something and i even write out the imaginary plot in my notes app. so anyway one of my NEW plot lines is that me and jerome have arranged marriage. im hoping we hate each other and get divorced and married again and have like 3 kids and divorce again. i set his relation to me as spouse and idk if that actually does anything but whatever
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tinycoffeeroom · 8 months ago
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thank god for bikes | arthurtv
inspired by @mrstelevision 🤍
face claim: steph bohrer ♡
request: here !
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📍 london
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liked by gkbarry, max_balegde, and 98,302 others
y/nsworld about last night ˚ʚ♡ɞ˚
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user1 i'm in love with you
gkbarry cant believe i didn't even get photo creds ↳ y/nsworld please forgive my sins oh great gkbarry
user2 y/n!! i think the guys u mentioned on ur twt was george clarke and arthurtv!! arthur posted on twt about george getting hit by a bike on a wall!! ↳ y/nsworld !! let me check his twt <3
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liked by y/nsworld, wroetoshaw and 29,492 others
arthurtv first pic taken moments before disaster (at least this one won't leave a scar)
georgeclarkeey don't know what was worse, the bike ptsd or you dribbling down your shirt ↳ arthurtv your mum doesn't mind my dribbling ↳ y/nsworld the dribbling was funnier to watch tbh ↳ georgeclarkeey take that mr television
gkbarry i didn't even notice it was you guys hiding in the corner ↳ georgeclarkeey just wanted some alone time with my boyfriend x ↳ arthurtv stop telling people i'm your boyfriend!!
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👤 max_balegde liked by max_balegde, arthurtv and 38,028 others
y/nsworld wine in coffee cups and classic literature in a park, my idea of heaven ꕤ
max_balegde got home off my head and now andrews mad i've ruined dinner plans ↳ y/nsworld andrew baby im so sorry :( ↳ andrew_spanndy could never blame you xx ↳ max_balegde god just date her already wooooow
gkbarry regret introducing the two of you, my poor ears will never recover from this ↳ y/nsworld thats your fault for putting two professional yappers together xx
arthurtv pretty sure that's bride you're reading... wouldn't call werewolf smut classic literature ↳ y/nsworld and how do YOU know what's in the book? 🤨
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👤 arthur_tv, max_balegde liked by y/nsworld, arthurnfhill and 30,395 others
georgeclarkeey totally normal photo to promote the newest useless hotline ep x
max_balegde rip my purple crocs... can't believe y/n stole them right off my feet... ↳ user2 !!! y/n at the arthurtv podcast recording?? my y/ntv senses are tingling ↳ user3 i'm pretty sure she was there bc her and max are friends... ♥️ y/nsworld ↳ user2 they've never randomly had their friends at recordings, dw you'll join the y/ntv cult soon
📍 ibiza
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👤 georgeclarkeey, chrismd, arthurnfhill liked by arthurnfhill, y/nsworld and 45,028 others
arthurtv thank you spotify for inviting us out! (photo cred: y/nsworld)
user2 i am going to scream from the rooftops, y/ntv'ers unite!!
y/nsworld should receive compensation for having to look at george's bare grippers the entire weekend ↳ arthurtv will bring round some wine this weekend ↳ y/nsworld good boy ↳ user2 ... y'all are fucking with me atp
📍 ibiza
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liked by arthurtv, gkbarry and 83,028 others
y/nsworld beach bum 𓇼
gkbarry happiness looks so good on you ↳ y/nsworld i love the bones of you
user2 !! WHO TOOK THE PHOTO I FEEL INSANE ↳ y/nsworld my friend! :)
📍 ibiza
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liked by y/nsworld, georgeclarkeey and 49,204 others
arthurtv decided to stay in the sunshine a few more days :)
user3 user2 i fear you may be onto something ↳ user2 i'm gonna eat glass. like i am actually putting shards in my mouth rn ↳ y/nsworld omg pls don't
y/nsworld looking good mr television ↳ arthurtv why thank you miss world
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liked by arthurtv, max_balegde and 83,028 others
y/nsworld use code ynsworld for 15% off ⋆⭒˚。⋆
max_balegde leaving my bf for you rn. ↳ andrew_spanndy not if i leave you first ↳ y/nsworld i can date both of you at the same time xx
arthurtv djsidjief djg ↳ y/nsworld you ok mr television?
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y/nsworld didn't even think about what i was wearing when i went to go see mr hill sing about cold coffee, sorry guys you got the wrong arthur xx
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👤 y/nsworld liked by y/nsworld, arthurnfhill and 93,294 others
arthurtv someone forgot to change over to their finsta so i guess it's hard launch time... somehow got the most gorgeous girl on earth to agree to date me, must be my fantastic sense of humour
y/nsworld lbr most of them already knew, we weren't exactly subtle ↳ arthurtv speak for yourself xx
theburntchip it's the big ol' hog you got in them trousers ♥️ y/nsworld ↳ arthurtv ah yes forgot about that
max_balegde take care of her or me and andrew are snatching her real quick ↳ y/nsworld ... i may have to do some rethinking
user2 i can't believe i was right... VINDICATION ♥️ arthurtv, y/nsworld
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👤 arthur_tv liked by arthurtv, gkbarry and 104,845 others
y/nsworld told him i forgot to change to finsta but really i just wanted to show that i bagged a hottie ✮⋆˙
georgeclarkeey still can't believe you snatched him from right under my nose ↳ y/nsworld we're still in the honeymoon phase so i may give him back x ↳ arthurtv what the fuck
gkbarry crying into a pint of ice cream thanks xx ↳ y/nsworld you know you're the love of my life xx
y/nsworld also user2 sorry for gaslighting you xx ↳ user2 i have never been so happy to be gaslighted could do a happy lil cry ↳ y/nsworld our fave y/ntv'er we love you ♡
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starillusion13 · 1 year ago
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omg Hi! Im not sure if you’re still accepting requests but if you still do… I would like to request an ot8 ateez x reader where they all leave her because of a misunderstanding and then they chase her back after but she doesn’t forgive/give in so easily ? Thank you love ❤️
Lost you forever
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Pairing: Ateez! ot8 x fem! reader
Genre: Angst, Mafia, Mature
Warnings: crying, mention of death, poison, mentions of mafia activities like shooting and deals in mafia, misunderstanding, pregnancy(?) [plz tell me if I have missed something] oc doesn't forgive easily coz she is deeply hurt.
W.C: 5.3k (i was so into it sorry)
Note: please I want to thanks to people for reading and reblogging. Reviews are always appreciated 😭. Applause to the ones who come up to me to interact and they know how friendly I am. Okay enough!
Network: @cultofdionysusnet @k-vanity
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“I have found her.”
All the noise died down with just one sentence. The room is now pin drop silent with all the heads turned towards the same direction and eyes focused on one person. The one who has just entered through the main door and whose voice made everyone stop in their tracks.
The leader of the group with a blank expression, walks towards the said person and grabs the collar of the leather jacket, eyes burning with his creased forehead but somewhere he wants to believe the words he has just heard.
“You realize what you are speaking right, Mingi?”
Nodding his head, he stares right back, “Absolutely.”
“Are you sure that’s her? Maybe, you might have mistaken someone else.”
Closing his eyes for a second, he sighs, “I have seen her with my own eyes, up so close to realize enough that it was her. Her sweet smile and those soft hands, everything is same.”
The one holding his collar loosen his grip and walks over to the table to get back his drink.
“Hongjoong, stop drinking.” The eldest scolds the leader before turning towards the other, “Then where is she and why didn’t you bring back her here? Where exactly did you see?”
“She was working at the café, down the Ross street. The target’s location was last seen in that café and when I reached there, he had already left and then when I heard that sweet voice asking if I need something?”
“did she see you?” The youngest asks him with curiosity filled in his eyes.
“No. I ordered a simple coffee just to see her longer and when she handed it over to me, I felt her soft and innocent hands touching my rough and ruthless ones. I was wearing a mask so she didn’t notice me but she was hiding her pain really well with her sweet smile.”
“But her eyes were telling something else.” Mingi turns towards Yeosang on hearing his response.
Everyone is feeling guilty that they are the reason you are working all alone there and having the pain inside you which your eyes reflect enough to let them know how you are feeling. They have been with you long enough to know every detail of your actions, to read your emotions from afar, to know if you are happy or to realize that you are hiding something then why. Why did they misunderstood you back then and left you all alone helpless?
“I want to see her. Take me there, just tell me which café is that exactly and I will be on my way there.”
“San, calm down. Take it slow. I know that you are eager to meet her like we all are but we can’t just go there like this. You know what we did back that day. I don’t think, she would want to see us again.”
If they had this much power in their hand to erase that day or to change the situation that occurred that day then they would have done long way back but now its impossible to do so. It’s been three years that they have left you but when their mission in this new country led them to cross your path again, they are not going to leave this chance out of their hand. Searching you for so long and not getting any sight of you has made their life a disaster. Hongjoong has been drinking a lot since he found out that he had done wrong with you and not a single member of his gang can control his vigorous nature but being the leader of the uprising mafia gang, he has to control his limits to not let the opposition know his weakness. Yunho is not better than him here, being the fighter of the group, he is overdoing and exhausting himself just because he can’t get you out of his mind and showing his anger on others. Well, Seonghwa needs to be calm here as being the eldest, he finds this as his responsibility to check if his members are doing okay and him being the second in command has to be with the leader most of the time. But the question is how can he just pretend that he doesn’t think about you, his thoughts are always storming inside his head which are revolving around how to get you back. San is restless, he is almost every time being out of the house doing illegal shits without even informing the leader and just messing up things, which sometimes almost bring them to face a hectic situation but thanks to Wooyoung who is always there to save him but what about himself. He is the one who would show his emotions up his sleeves but when it comes to get you back, he is lost in a void. He doesn’t even know whether to be angry, upset, mad or just forget about you. Forget about you? Is it even possible? Mingi is always out of the base, he has taken upon himself to look out for the targets and engaging with the spies all around to know the motives of other gangs and be prepared but one thing is always flashing to him, thoughts of you. Jongho has kept himself silent for most of the times, away from his members and just trying his way to find out where you are. Are you even alive? He is always there to bug Yeosang to find you in every corner of their hometown but you were nowhere to be found and once they had lost all hope of you being alive. Yeosang has taken the job of being hacker too seriously and that just to find you till the last cell of his data but everytime, he is just getting disappointed.
🐚🐚🐚🐚🐚🐚🐚🐚
“Thank you for your order. Have a great night ahead.”
You smile sweetly towards the customer who just left the café and its almost nine at night so you should get prepared to leave for the night. You are always the last worker to leave on the busy scheduled day as you live just few houses away from here and the manager is too sweet to even let her guard accompany you to reach your house. She once requested you to do the extra night shifts on busy days as other workers live bit far away and you could be much helpful to her. She has this warm motherly aura and so you couldn’t reject her request.
“Y/N, I’m so sorry that you had to stay back late again. It’s Halloween season and you know how people are crowding over here.” Your manager having a guilty expression on her face approaches you.
“Oh no, it’s really fine with me. I can keep my mind off with some stuffs while working here so it’s not a big problem. I rather enjoy being here than staying at home and overthinking.”
“You are so sweet. You should take some leaves and rest for few days as I haven’t seen you taking leaves or going out with someone. Don’t waste your young age everytime working here. Have some enjoyment and refresh your mind.”
“Working here gives me the happiness. I don’t think being with someone can actually refresh my mind or rather haunt me…..Nevermind, you must go back as your son is waiting for you and after getting everything back to it’s place, I will hand over the keys to Mr.Lee.”
Nodding her head and waving at you, she rode back to her place leaving you and Mr. lee, who must be in the locker room getting his stuff and later waiting for you outside.
Arranging all the stuffs, it took twenty minutes as your other co-workers had almost done everything before leaving and the previous orders were simple so you didn’t have much to do. Picking up your bag from the counter, you give a final glance to the place to make a mental note if everything is fine. Satisfied with the result, you quickly went outside to see him already standing and waiting for the keys but he is looking impatient.
“Are you fine, Mr.Lee?”
“U-uh yeah…” sweats visibly lining the forehead and lips quivering. Why is he sweating in this cold night?
“If you need help, please do tell me.”
“Actually, I need to leave early… my daughter needs some help and she has just now called me so I think I cant go with you today.”
“Its fine with me. I can manage on my own, its just few steps and I will be home so don’t worry and leave. I hope your daughter is fine.”
He thanked you several times and left. Like always, your smile is still having that warmth even in this chilly night. Your hands rub your arms and you start walking towards your block. Everything is like usual until you start to feel someone is following you but waving it off as if it must be your fear of walking alone without him. Also, it’s Halloween and anything creepy can happen. Even the children’s pranks are creepier than ghosts. You quicken your steps, hands gripping the bag tightly.
You feel a hand on your shoulder and you almost had screamed when another hand pressed over your mouth, shutting you up and muffling your scream. Your eyes closed tight and hands trying to remove the palm from over your mouth.
“Y/N. Don’t be afraid, it’s me.”
You froze. Not due to the chilly wind just blew past you but because of the very familiar voice. Familiar? You don’t think it has that same familiarity like before. Every morning, this used to be the first voice you would listen while waking you up and engulfing you in a big bear hug. That’s past as now you are used to being wake up with your alarm or nightmares. Just a reminder, he is the part of causing that nightmare.
Parting your eyes, you can see the tall man standing in front of you. Looking down at you with a soft look on his face, teary eyes and hands slowly slip down from your mouth to your biceps to hold them firmly. The street is brightly lit due to the decorations for the occasion so everything is very clear for your eyes. You stare back at him and not knowing how to react as your body and mind is going against each other but you know a little part of your heart still beats for him, for them.
He is about to pull you in for a hug when you stop him with your hands pressed over his chest, preventing him from coming any closer.
“Y/N….”
“Stop it. You should not just hug randomly someone. You may know me but sorry I can’t really remember you.”
“Random? You are my angel. I want to hug you and say sorry for what I have done. Don’t pretend that you don’t know me, please tell me you have missed me equally.”
“Look, you must have mistaken me with someone else but I’m not her.”Pushing his hands off from you, “Even if I know your name doesn’t mean I know you, you are just like the rest of the customers in my daily life whose name I have to hear often. So it’s nothing special and as I don’t hear your name anymore maybe I would forget it forever.”
“Y/N!”
You make a ‘tsk’ sound on hearing him shout your name. Even if they pretend to be polite or gentle with you, they are the ruthless uprising mafia gang so what do you even expect less from them while controlling their aggression?
“This is you. Shout on me. Blame on me. but. Don’t show your kindness to me again. You have literally showed your true colors that day and look here we are. Standing face to face and you still shouting on me just like that day. You are still the same, Yunho.”
Hearing his name coming out of your mouth after three years is sending a wave of warmth to his heart. Atleast, you called him by his name even though your words are straight away piercing his heart like a sharp knife, you haven’t spoken to him like this ever but he knows he deserves it for leaving you that day.
A black SUV comes to a stop near to a side of you both. If it were any other time, you swear you would have got frightened but the raging veins with hatred towards him is not minding any danger surrounding you. You didn’t look at it’s direction but can hear several footsteps are nearing you. Why are you not scared? Is it because you are feeling safe in his presence? No, it’s just you don’t want to be saved or show your weakness, atleast in front of him.
“Doll.”
Don’t turn back. You are just imagining things. He can’t be hear even yunho is not here, right? You want to believe this but the presence behind you is too near you, his warm hands placed over your shoulder sending a jolt through your body. It may be warm but is lacking the warmth, you can only feel the coldness of feelings there. Turning around, you look into the eyes of Mingi, who just called you with the name he gave you on your first date with him.
Okay, so everyone is here. All the eyes are just looking at you, only you. If it was something back in those days then you would have become shy and hide behind Yunho and not look at them but this time, your daring eyes precisely staring back at them. Their eyes filled with regret meeting your eyes filled with hatred.
“Why are you all here?”
“For you.” Hongjoong replies quickly enough and this made you raise your brow.
The scene is like a deja-vu, very similar to the last time you had seen them. Them circling you under the night sky and you are the centre of the situation but that time, they had that rage in their eyes for blaming you and hoping you to vanish from their eyesight but this time, they have the fear…of losing you again.
“it’s not funny. If you all are going to have some Halloween pranks on people then go somewhere else, don’t waste my time.”
“It’s really not funny and also not a prank. We are really here for you.”Hongjoong said calmly.
“And? You got to see me. You needed to know if I’m alive or not and now you might kill me as I already know a lot of your things and it’s dangerous for you all to keep me alive. Go ahead, shoot me.”
“Y/n, are you insane? How can you think like this that we will shoot you?”
“San, it’s very obvious from the way you were pointing the gun to my forehead with fire in your eyes.” You point to the middle of your forehead with two fingers. They would have found your acts childish but your tone is too harsh for their ears, making it obvious how much hatred you have towards them.
The said man fidgeting his fingers, looking down and a single tear escapes his eyes. The tear of losing you. You are so near to him, just few feet away where he can run to you and hug you tightly and pull you in for a kiss yet so far away because of the way, your eyes glaring at him.
Mingi moves aside when Hongjoong comes in front of you, “Princess-“
“Don’t call me that when you don’t know how to treat one. I’m not your princess. Well, I’m no one to you.”
No one to him and this word burns his heart. Not only his but others too. Still he tried to speak to you.
“Whatever happened that day, we are really guilty for that. We are extremely sorry to treat you that way. I don’t know what happened to me and I put the blame on you, thinking it was your plan, everything I had lost that day was because of me and I lost you but trust me, each day I have spent regretting for this. Please forgive me. Please.”
He is no more holding back his tears, being a leader is a great responsibility and controlling his emotions in every situation is the major part but you were always there with him by his side where he could express himself, to show his vulnerable self to you but this time instead of comforting him, you are mocking back at him.
“Are you crying because of regret or losing your mission that day? I’m sure it’s about the shitty mission or what else-”
Yunho turns you around harshly and this time you can see his flaming eyes, “Are you making fun of him? What happened to you really? You have totally changed. This is not Y/N, we knew back then.”
“Exactly, this is not your Y/N anymore. This is me. An orphan who lives alone in this block and works by the café down the street. Also, not nice to meet any of you.”
You give him a blank expression. His grip on you tightens and you just stare at the hold, hissing but not telling him to leave you. Why? Because you want to feel him. No. You want to see how much he can lose control on you and the physical pain is nothing compared to the mental pain, you have gone through the years.
“Please come back to us. We are here to take you back, to your home, our home.”
Seonghwa. Please don’t speak like that. He is a siren for this because even if you want to hate him, his voice is always as if lurking you to trust him, his words which are still soothing to your ears, remembering those feather kisses. No. They are pinching you like a thorn just like your words are doing to his heart.
“There is nothing called ours. My place is here and nowhere else. I guess you don’t know the meaning of a home. Home is somewhere you can feel warmth and comfort, a forgiving atmosphere to erase your pain into happiness. But the place you are mentioning is a prison to me, hearing the name suffocates me, the memories haunt me. Atleast, here, I’m okay by myself, far away from you all but still nothing is a home to me.”
“Why are you saying like this? Please don’t push us away when we just got you back.”
“So? I should forgive you all and get back to you. Never. This is not happening ever.”
You walk towards him, his ears perk up hearing your heels nearing him, Yunho has left his grip on you but his hands aching to touch you again. The memories of you both spending nights together with warm skin against skin, hushed promises surrounded by the burning love but now even if your skin is warm, the touch was cold with numb feelings.
You pull the strap of Seonghwa’s jacket and other hand block his hand which he was about to raise and swiftly pull the gun out, pointing it towards his forehead. Others come to a warned position.
“If I shoot you here and wait enough to bleed you to death.” You turn to look back at them, their surprise faces looking back at you but no one daring to step forward. “Then if I say, please forgive me. Will it be worthy?”
“But…but we didn’t hurt you. We…we just….” San doesn’t know how to complete his sentence. He is lost within his own words. Seeing you after years, your coldness towards them, even pointing gun towards one of their member and remembering how you and him were in the same position last time causing his hands shake. So ironic for a mafia member. No matter how strong they are, how ruthless they can be but when it comes to you, you are their weakness.
“It’s not always hurting someone physically. Their way of act towards you speaks volume and the words you told me while pointing the gun is way more painful than if you would have actually shoot me.” Turning, towards Seonghwa, “You have already killed me that day. I am dead for you.”
“Baby, please don’t say like this.”
“How many times do I need to tell you that I’m nothing to you all? Stop calling me names.”
Wooyoung’s eyes go wide on hearing your shout. He is so much taken aback by your outburst that he is almost looking helpless towards Mingi standing near him.
“I’m sorry…I mean…please don’t say like this. You are everything to me, to us. You don’t know how messed up we were when we left you. I’m so sorry to leave you but please atleast lets forget about that incident and please come back to us.” Wooyoung stutters but not again using the endearment.
Mingi chirps in, “Human can may make mistakes. Whatever happened that day, we know it was not your fault, it was a mistake and we really forgive you for that. I’m sorry for being harsh on you.”
“Yes. We are really guilty. We should have listened to you but rather we blamed you on the spot and said such harsh words which even if I want to take back, I can’t. I didn’t let you to explain but ended up on a conclusion.” Wooyoung ends the sentence with tears spilling from his eyes silently.
Do you forgive them? Yes. but Why? They are still telling you it was your mistake. You cant forgive them so. No.
“So you still think that it happened because of my mistake? It was an accident?”
“Y/n…”
“Stop it, Yunho. Don’t speak a single word. I’m getting annoyed with you.”
Your steps come to a stop in front of Wooyoung whose eyes are shining to get you so close to him. He raises his hands but got yanked away by you. Maintaining a straight eye contact with him, you grab his collar.
“look at me and say that it was my mistake. It all happened because of me.”
He remained silent. He parts his lips but nothing coming out and this is making you impatient.
“Tell me!”
Hot tears streaming down your eyes. Still your body is not getting enough warmth and craving for it during the cold night in that lonely street. Even if you are with all of them still you are feeling alone. Your vision is getting blurred but you roughly rubbed your eyes with the sleeves of the shrug. Your breathings are getting heavy and you are losing control.
The youngest pulls away Wooyoung from your hold and holds your red hands in his grip which are shaking due to the tight fist.
“Please, calm down. It’s me Jongho. It’s not your fault. No one is blaming you. Take deep breathes and calm down.”
He knows that you are hyperventilating and he still knows how your body is reacting and you hate this. You harshly pull your hands away from his hold.
“Don’t touch me. My body aches when I remember how I let you monsters to touch me, everywhere, every day. I’m feeling so ashamed of myself. Don’t make me regret more. I hate the fact how you still know this about my body and am beyond surprised that you still remember me. Oh wait, you have to remember every detail of your enemy before plotting a nice plan and attacking them, right? And today is the perfect day.”
“You are not my enemy. You are my-“
“Stop. Don’t complete that sentence, Jongho.”
“Don’t speak to him like that, he was not even there during the whole mission, he was in for a quick need for back-end support for Yeosang.”Mingi says in a moderate tone.
“But was there long enough to blame me.”
Hongjoong places a firm hand on Mingi’s shoulder, “No one is blaming you. It was an accident and you didn’t know what to do there.”
“I know that whatever you did was to save yourself and I’m glad that you are fine.”
You stare at Hongjoong for a few moments and then burst out laughing like a maniac. Any other person would have found you weird and commented that you have gone mad. Even they would have made fun of you and teased you that how foolish you looked like while laughing like this.
Frustrated groans and your hands raising to your scalp and you mess your hairs. You are totally acting like a drunk person.
“hongoong, did you hear what he just said? Did you hear everyone? He said that I did that to save me. Huh. To. Save. Me.”
You skip steps towards yeosang and slap him, “You think I have killed Mr. Kim to save myself?”
“Y/n!”
You could barely hear Seonghwa and Yunho’s shout when you grabbed Yeosang’s biceps and shake him. He is shocked not just because you have slapped him but seeing you losing your mind like this and having no control over your actions and he is still thinking that something like this might have happened which cause you to kill Mr.Kim.
“Tell me Yeosang. You think I did it for myself? Tell me.”
Nothing he said in reply, just stared right back at you, the only thought running through his mind is to hug you and say that he won’t be leaving you again. He would protect you from the whole world. His daily searching to get your location was always in vain and he still can’t believe his eyes that you are standing in front of him but your eyes showing the amount of hatred in you for him. a helpless cry audible to his ears to which he was deaf during last time.
“So, you do think it is.”
You take a few steps back, staring back at each of them. San tried to come near you but Yeosang stopped him and shook his head.
“I…I did it…I killed him…It was not an accident.” You look up to the sky and smile to yourself, “I did it to save my family. I shoot him to save you all from his evil planning. You all were my family and I tried my best to face him, my hands were shaking, head was spinning. I couldn’t place the actions and words right in place but I knew I had to do it to save you all.”
“save us?” Hongjoong asks you in surprise.
You chuckle sadly, “Your beloved dad had only invited you to the party so that he could destroy you and your gang. He realized that you are not his own son and Jungwoo is his real son so to give him all the power, it was a better option to erase you from the path. I got to know this because Jungwoo told me and he didn’t want to support his dad in this way and somehow mr.Kim tried to kill me when he heard that I wont let you join the party.”
“That’s why…that’s why…you were whining to spend time with us and cancel the schedule.”
You nod on Jongho’s statement.
“I didn’t know how to stop you so before I could come up with a plan, you were already in your way to catch your target at the party held by Mr.Kim. And…and…when I tried to follow you all, he caught me and poisoned me.”
“Why did he poison you?” Wooyoung almost shout hearing this.
“He wanted to see you all going down first seeing me die and then it would be fun to end you. He really succeeded here.”
“What do you mean?” Yunho asks you slowly. You glance towards him but nod a bit.
Picking up your bag which is lying on the floor because of the previous commotion, you look down and tears flowing continuously, “even when I was poisoned, I escaped from the room and when I reached the scene, you were already in the middle of the bloody scene with your target. He was going to leave the place and would leave you all dying in the bomb blast and that’s how I thought it was best to kill him.”
“You didn’t tell that you were poisoned, we thought you were acting of feeling sick.” Even though Seonghwa confessed what he did feel right back then still he is feeling guilty towards you. You stare right back into his eyes.
“When I shot him in front of you all, Hongjoong snatched the gun from me and you harshly pulled me towards the exit and then it went on with you all blaming me.” You cast a glance towards San, “you pointed the gun at me and threatened me to kill if I don’t spill whose spy I was. You even doubted me with Jungwoo that we were cheating behind you and it was our plan to destroy you.”
Huh. Such cheap thought they had. They all blamed you and called such names and even threatened to kill you. It was not enough that they even insulted you in front of everyone present in the party even tried to prove your imaginary relation with Jungwoo.
“I’m sorry…”
“Mingi. Say sorry to Y/N who was trying to explain everything to you all, who was enduring the pain of spreading poison in her body and was still trying to protect you. Go hug her and pull towards you and say everything is okay, whose hands were shaking because she never killed anyone in her life before despite you all trained her in every field for her self-defence. Go and listen to her and ask her. Are you fine?”
He can’t match your eyes so he looks down regretting his every move, you throw a dirty look at him yet somewhere your eyes showing a little bit of sympathy. Your body still reacting to their touch and wanting to run to their embrace making you hate yourself.
“You can’t go. She is dead. Your Y/N is dead. Congratulations, you have killed her that day. You have killed a new life with her as well. She didn’t even get to know who her father is. Mission completed Boss.”
You stare straight and boldly towards Hongjoong.
“Her? Father? What are you saying?” Yeosang is impatient on hearing such things from you. He is confused just like the others and their heart is racing whereas yours is calm but painfully beating.
“I have lost my first baby and one of you lost the honour of being the father for the first time. It was too late when I woke up in the hospital, the poison had already been spread too much. I don’t know how I am still alive but maybe atleast Jungwoo didn’t leave my side.”
It was a big storm for them. As if the ground disappeared from underneath their feet. You were pregnant and they were unaware of it. If only they had agreed with your warnings, then they would have been having a happy family time with you and their baby together. No matter whose baby she was, she would have been theirs, they all would have given their fatherly love to her.
Without saying any more word, you begin to walk towards your way and didn’t even look back for the last time towards them.
“Y/N…”You heard wooyoung calls you from behind and they might follow you.
Still facing your back towards them, you speak slowly but audible enough for them, “Don’t follow me or come to find me again. You have left me that day, helplessly crying in the garden. Don’t expect me to forgive you and go back to you again.”
You walk away, far away from them where your silhouette getting lost in the painful dark but they know atleast you are safe and alive beyond that darkness. Their eyes follow the last bit of your presence.
They won’t be giving up on you like this. They will get you back someday but they also know that they have lost a part of you forever.
“I love you but I have lost you.”
PART 2
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Perma Taglist: @mymoodwriting @justhere4kpop @anyamaris @yeoobin @icchyi @jwnghyuns @piratequeen-queenofgames @dinonuguaegi @oreharuuu @eriny123 @sanwifesstuff @kiwiisnthereoops @kiwiraccoon [open!]
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yakumtsaki · 3 months ago
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Dear readers, we've been through so much together and you know at this point it takes a lot for me to describe a situation as 'out of control'.. yet here we are. So Kea moves in and the following happens in the span of like 2 hours:
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Barth beats up Felina.
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Kea beats up Spice.
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Barth beats up Cyan.
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Felina beats up Barth. Like seriously, ENOUGH. I've decided that next generation when we're at the third cousin tier relation I'm just gonna let whoever wants to date a cousin do it because holy hell, breaking them up has been a disaster. Everyone is near aspiration failure, everyone has shit grades, we're BROKE, and to top it all off..
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-HELLO AGAIN
Why. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING WE DON'T OWE ANY BILLS LIKE THIS IS LITERAL THEFT. I also love how everyone is already so miserable so the repoman just comes and takes all the fun objects we can't afford to replace, FML
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Barth's aspiration meter is absolutely pathetic as a result of everyone viciously assaulting him and desperate times call for desperate measures..
-Well well.. If it isn't Glitched Butler #9.. How's it hanging? ;)
-Same as always, I'm here to not cook and to open the doors we no longer have thanks to Baby.
-You know what, I'm too depressed to seduce you so will you just sleep with me?
-As you well know my butler programming prohibits me from doing anything helpful!
FFS. It's ok Barth, I will fulfill your throw a party want, I don't see how anything could go wrong with the situation in this house being what it is!
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-Hey there! Join our party! Sleep with me! I COMMAND YOU
Barth please get it together.
-I CAN'T FUNCTION ROMANTICALLY BECAUSE I'M SO SAD BUT I REFUSE TO THROW ANY WANTS THAT DON'T INVOLVE ME SLEEPING WITH SOMEONE
OK DO YOU MAYBE SEE THE PROBLEM WITH THAT APPROACH
-NO
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-Ugh, Spice is so hot when he's crying after I beat him up.
Ok Kea, I'm only gonna ask this once: are you fucking kidding me????
-What? It's only natural to be attracted to your girlfriend's ex who is her cousin and your enemy.
I'm just gonna pretend I didn't see this shit and move on.
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So I have invited several of Barth's existing and potential lovers to this party and my goal is to figure out who, if anyone, I'm gonna marry him to. Now please enjoy this sequence of events:
a) Barth is flirting with my current top spouse pick, Stella Terrano, and it's going great!
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b) Barth leaves Stella Terrano to go sleep with GODDAMN GUNNAR. Since I can't seem to shake this fucker off, the only option remaining is to give him a ridiculous fake accent to make him bearable.
-Oi luvs you, Barth!
-Why are you talking like a servant from Downton Abbey? Also who the hell caught me cheating now?
Who knows or cares? Let's continue:
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c) Barth goes downstairs to beat up Cyan.
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d) Klara aka my former top spouse pick attempts to leap into Barth's arms and HE LETS HER DROP
-Äääääh mein arsch!
-Sorry Klara but I refuse to get caught cheating by Gunnar..
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-..unless it's with Stella Terrano!
LOL OMG, I really thought I'd have to marry him to fucking Gunnar due to THIS SHIT:
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But God's mercy finally shines upon me!!!
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Oh man I'm so upset by this >:)
-Ha culd youse do 'is, ya broke ma 'eart!!!
-What?
-Oh my, turtles are considered the sexiest animal in my planet👽
Stella ffs. Oh well, so sad, goodbye Gunnar, I was really hoping to add your freakish lack of chin into our gene pool but looks like I won't have the chance huhu!
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e) Barth flirts with Stella again and is caught cheating AGAIN..
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f) ..by Sarah Love who I keep forgetting exists but man that's a HARDCORE slap, she legit got her fingers in his eyeball(s)
-SORRY WHATSYOURNAME BUT I THINK BLINDING ME IS A BIT OF AN OVERREACTION
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Yay! See Barth, our amazing party did the trick and now everything is gonna be ok!
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-IM BLIND IM BLINDDDD I CAN'T SEE
Excuse me?! You know what Barth I'm done helping you, nothing is ever good enough for you!
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h00nerz · 2 years ago
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murphy’s law!
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masterlist | 1k celebration
pairing: choi beomgyu x gn!reader
genre: angst, fluff, high school au, troublemaker!beomgyu, stuco president!reader, kind of one sided enemies to lovers if you squint
word count: 3.2k (im so sorry)
warnings: none afaik? just burnt out reader
prompt(s): #5 — “why are you crying?”
requested: “hi! congratulations on 1k followers!!! for the event, can i have prompt 5 with beomgyu? what i had on mind was like highschool au and reader just had a bad day or smth and had to stay after school to clean, and started crying in the classroom alone and beomgyu was also in the school and heard reader crying and found that it was his long time crush? i hope this makes sense! sorry if this was too long too😓 thank you in advance!!♥️♥️” — @loveliii
authors note: omg the first drabble of the celebration... except apparently i can’t write drabbles so it’s more of a oneshot plz forgive me.
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MURPHY’S LAW STATES: everything that can go wrong, will go wrong. Now, you had no idea who Murphy was, but you used to always believe he was full of shit. There had been plenty of instances where things could have gone wrong, but they didn’t. 
In fact, when it came to your case, it seemed like things usually went right. You got good grades, and got along well with all of your teachers. You were the captain of your school’s volleyball team, and had even been elected your school’s student body president your last year of high school. Things always went well for you, which is why you had never really been a believer in what that Murphy guy had to say. 
At least, that’s what you thought before today. Because now, you were starting to think maybe you had taken your past ability to narrowly avoid disaster for granted. Because today, just like Murphy had once predicted, everything that could go wrong did just that: go wrong. 
It started with your stupid charger. The night before, you must have apparently unplugged it, because when you plugged it into your phone before going to bed, it never charged. Which meant your phone died, and that meant your alarm never went off. And that meant you woke up ten minutes before school started, and your bus was going to be there any second. 
So, in the quickest fashion you could muster, you brushed through your hair so you looked at least somewhat presentable then slipped into your uniform. You were incredibly impressed by how fast you’d managed to do that—just over 60 seconds! It must have been some kind of record. Less impressive, though, was the fact that even though you had been so speedy, you watched as the bus you were supposed to be on drove away in the direction of your school, leaving you behind. 
Thank goodness for all those years playing volleyball, you had built up enough stamina to (barely) get you from your house all the way to the school. You were twenty minutes late, sure, but hey, at least you were there, right? Your first period teacher was not so understanding, almost immediately assigning you to detention after school. 
Detention. You never got detention. In your four years at that school, working your ass off to be the best student you could be, a child your parents could be proud ofc, not once had you gotten assigned to detention. The realization that for the first time ever, you’d been punished by a teacher, was a foreign feeling as you sat at your desk and replayed everything that had happened. Detention, all because your stupid phone charger decided not to work the night before. 
“Damn, I thought you were immune to detention.” A voice behind you whispered, and you glanced over to see Choi Beomgyu grinning at you. Of course Beomgyu had seen that all. 
Choi Beomgyu was the exact opposite of you. He had fights with teachers basically on the daily, and you were pretty sure he was failing most of his classes. Not because he was stupid, by any means, he was actually really smart. He just didn’t try, he didn’t care about school the way you did. What he did care about, though, was teasing you as much as was humanly possible. 
And of course, he had just seen you, the student body president, run into class twenty minutes late and get detention. 
You had half a mind to bite back at him, because oh would that be satisfying, but you weren’t looking to talk in the middle of class and make your punishment worse than it already was. You instead gave him a side-eye glare, and he must have found it amusing since he started to giggle. 
Once class got out, you really shouldn’t have been surprised to glance over your shoulder to see Choi Beomgyu following you, hot on your tail like he was some sort of lost puppy. You groaned quietly to yourself, hoping that if you ignored him long enough, he would get bored and walk away. Unfortunately, Beomgyu was a very patient man. 
“I can’t believe you were late! What happened? Did your carriage lose a wheel on the way here, your highness?” He asked, using his long legs so he could get right up next to you.  
You stayed silent.
“Come on, you can tell me! I’m like, the king of being late. I won’t judge.” He nudged your arm with his elbow, with just enough pressure for you to fall out of your rhythm. Now, he finally had your attention as you turned to look at him, eyes narrowed.
“Look, I’m not in the mood today, okay?” You told him flatly, and you were expecting him to find your irritable mood amusing, and find a way to push your buttons further than he already had, but he didn’t. 
Instead, his face softened and he (surprisingly) went quiet. You didn’t bother sticking around to figure out what that was all about, not when you still needed to get to your class on the other end of the building, and you were not risking being late to a second class. So, you gave him a small nod, a thank you for leaving you alone, then walked away.
The rest of your day wasn’t any better. 
In your history class, you got your grades for a test you’d recently taken, and nearly fell out of your seat when you saw a big fat C staring back at you. And your horror increased tenfold when you saw it wasn’t just a C, but a C minus. Never in your high school career had you gotten a C minus. 
At that point of the day, you were starting to become convinced that someone had put some sort of curse on you. You didn’t really have any enemies who would have done that to you, though. Except maybe Choi Beomgyu, but you had a feeling putting a curse on someone was too much effort for him to be bothered with.
By the time the school day was over, you were completely exhausted. At lunch, your best friend, Sumin, accidentally spilled her drink on your uniform, and now you were wearing some extras from the lost and found that were much too big for you. You wanted nothing more than to go home, crawl into your bed and have a good cry, but you still had to do your detention. 
You weren’t really sure what to expect from detention, considering you’d never had to do it before. You knew you weren’t looking forward to it, though, and just hoped it wouldn’t be anything horrible--especially since it was your first offense.
Your first period teacher was waiting for you in her classroom after classes got out, and she greeted you with a sympathetic smile. “Y/N. You know you’re one of my favorite students, so it really broke my heart when I saw you come in late this morning.”
The urge to roll your eyes arose, but you managed to fight it. Here she was, acting like you had betrayed her or something, when really, it was her decision to punish you for something so small. 
“I understand.” You replied with a nod, avoiding her gaze. 
“Good. So, I figured out the perfect thing for you.” She stood up and began to walk out of the classroom, with you following closely behind. 
Apparently, the perfect thing for you was some storage room that clearly hadn’t been cleaned in a long time. There had been racks with boxes of textbooks that must have gotten knocked over, since the books were now all over the floor. And the room was covered in a thick layer of dust that made your nose itch the second you stepped inside. She left you with a singular rag, a bottle of cleaner, then left you alone.
You stood in the doorframe, assessing the room in front of you. Just from looking at it, you knew it was going to take you at least a few hours to clean the entire thing by yourself. Which meant it was going to be a few hours before you could go home, a few hours before you could go sleep this horrible, awful day away. Even worse, you were sure that something would go wrong during those next few hours that would prolong the time even longer. 
Throughout the whole day, ever since you first realized you’d missed the bus, you had felt tears pricking your waterline, but you had managed to hold them in. You were going to wait until you were in your own bedroom, in private, before you even thought of letting them out. But now, as you stood there, staring at the mess in front of you, you could no longer hold them in.
It was like the floodgates had opened up, and all of the emotions you’d been restraining all day were released. A sob racked through your body, and you were no longer able to keep yourself steady, your knees unbuckling beneath you and causing you to collapse onto the floor. It was wildly embarrassing, the way you became a mess on the floor of the dirtiest room you’d ever seen, where anyone could walk in and see you. 
And of course, because stupid Murphy just had to be right, that was exactly what happened. 
There was a soft knock at the door, and you hurriedly looked over your shoulder to see the absolute last person you wanted to see poking his head in. You were overcome with horror as you snapped your head around to look away, praying as hard as you could to whatever deity would listen that he hadn’t seen your tears. 
“Woah, are you crying?” He asked, and you shook your head.
“No. Why would I be crying?” You sniffled, picking up the rag and spray bottle you had dropped onto the floor and standing up. He caught a glimpse of your face again when you walked past, and he scoffed. 
“You’re totally crying. Why are you crying? What’s wrong?” He asked again, stepping further into the storage closet and shutting the door behind him. 
You shot him a glare as you attempted to stand one of the racks back up. “I’m not crying. Besides, even if I were, I’m not telling you. You’ll just make fun of me.” You mumbled the last part. Standing the rack up was proving to be futile. 
“No I wouldn’t!” He defended himself, watching as you struggled to push the rack up. “Here, let me help you with that--”
“No!” You snapped at him, and he backed up with his hands held up defensively. You tried one more time to stand it up, and let out a frustrated groan when it once again wouldn’t budge. You had no choice but to surrender, and move to the side so Beomgyu could help you. 
You were angry that you had to get his help to move the stupid thing. Now you were forced to be thankful he had showed up and barged in. “Thanks.” You muttered, brushing past him as you went to once again get your little rag and bottle.
“You’re welcome.” Beomgyu replied, and though you were facing away from him, you could hear his annoying, cocky smile in his voice. “So, are you going to tell me why you were crying?” 
“No.”
“Oh, so you were crying!”
“I didn’t say that.” You looked up at him as you sprayed cleaner onto the dusty shelf. “I told you already, didn’t I? I don’t want to talk about it.” 
Unfortunately, he didn’t seem as willing to drop the subject as he had earlier in the day. “Come on, Y/N. I saw you crying, you’re clearly upset, just tell me about it!” 
“You’re going to laugh at me.”
“No I won’t!” He exclaimed, sounding exasperated. You raised an eye at his outburst, and he cleared his throat. “Seriously. I won’t.” He softened his tone, looking at you with pleading eyes. 
You stared back at him, trying to figure out if you could trust him. This was Choi Beomgyu you were talking about, the boy who had tormented you for years on end with his constant teasing. But, he did look very sincere. And you were sort of itching to rant to someone. 
“Fine. My phone didn’t charge last night, so my alarm never went off, so I woke up late, then I missed the bus and had to run to school, and then I got detention, and then I got a C on my stupid history test, and then Sumin spilled her stupid soda on me, so I had to wear this stupid uniform from the lost and found, and-and then I had to come here and clean this stupid closet, and I’m just so tired, and I-I--” The next thing you knew you were crying again, your breath hitching in the back of your throat as the tears spilled onto your cheeks once again. 
The second the sobs slipped from your lips again, Beomgyu rushed around the shelf, slipping his arms around your trembling body and pulling you close to his chest. You were so desperate for any kind of comfort, you didn’t bother trying to push him away. Instead, you leaned into his touch, reaching up to grip onto the edge of his uniform jacket. He began to rub your back as you buried your face into his shirt, letting yourself cry--like, really cry. You thought you were going to pass out at any second from how difficult it was for you to catch your breath between sobs. 
After enough of his fingers rubbing circles into your back and his soft shh’s whispered into your ear, you were slowly able to calm down to the point you could breathe again. It was truly unbelievable that you were here, in some dusty storage closet crying into Choi Beomgyu’s arms. It was not a position you had ever predicted yourself to be in. And yet…
You didn’t totally hate it.
“Can I tell you something?” Beomgyu asked softly, and with a small sniffle, you nodded against his shirt. “The reason I tease you so much… It’s so embarrassing…” He laughed softly, and you gently pulled your head away, looking up at him with furrowed eyebrows.
“What?” You asked, and as he gazed down at you, his cheeks reddened. 
“Um… When we were in first grade, I tried to copy off of your test, once…”
“Yeah, I knew that.”
“What?! No you didn’t, I was so subtle, you didn’t even notice.” He shook his head, and you rolled your eyes. “But anyways, that’s not the point. I was trying to copy off your test, but I remember, I made the mistake of looking at your face--”
“What’s wrong with my face?” You asked defensively, a frown befalling your features.
“Let me finish!” He snapped at you, and out of curiosity to hear the rest of the story, you conceded. “So, I made the mistake of looking at your face, and you were all focused, and had your tongue sticking out of the side of your mouth,” he paused to allow a giggle to escape his lips. 
“And I remember thinking you were so cute, and then I got so distracted watching you, by the time you got up to turn your test in, I had missed everything you had written down.”
You stared at him in confusion, trying to figure out what on Earth the point of this whole story was. “What…?”
He rolled his eyes. “Oh come on, Y/N. You’re the top of all our classes, and you can’t figure it out?” 
You shook your head, and he let out a defeated sigh.
“I’m saying, Y/N, that I tease you because…” He paused, sucking in a shaky breath. “Because I like you, okay?” 
“Oh.” 
Oh.
Beomgyu liked you? Since first grade? You were unable to process his words, playing them in your head on repeat like some kind of broken record. He liked you. He annoyed the hell out of you, just because he liked you. What kind of middle school boy behavior was that? 
“Oh? Is that all you have to say to my heartfelt confession?” He asked in fake offense, and you quickly shook your head. 
“No! I’m just--it’s just--you like me? As in like-like me?” He nodded in confirmation, and you squinted your eyes at him. As he watched you, your gaze drifted down to his jacket, which you had been clinging onto just moments earlier, and the tear soaked fabric. 
You felt like you should be absolutely appalled by his confession, and wracked with disgust, or something. You weren’t supposed to like Beomgyu! You weren’t supposed to be able to even stand him! But, his confession wasn’t the worst thing you had ever heard. In fact, as your fingers reached out to graze the edge of his jacket, you thought maybe you sort of liked hearing it.
“Y/N?” He asked you quietly, and you hummed in answer. “You don’t have to say anything, you know. In fact, if you really want me to, I can leave. Or you can leave, and I’ll finish cleaning for you--”
Maybe it was because you were in an emotionally crazed state, or you were desperate to prove Murphy wrong, hell, maybe it was just because you liked him back, but whatever it was, something overcame you, and the next thing you knew, you were tightening your fingers around his jacket to pull him close to you and press your lips against his. 
The first thing you thought when you kissed Choi Beomgyu, was why hadn’t you done this sooner? You had been so consumed by your dislike towards him, and too focused on other things like your academics, you had never stopped to think of Beomgyu in this way. But now, as he immediately kissed you back, and wrapped his arms around your waist, you wished you had thought of him this way. 
Because kissing Choi Beomgyu was absolutely not wrong. Rather, it was very, very right. It was like his lips were made to fit perfectly against your own, as they moved together in unison. You started to think all the bad things that had gone down that day weren’t so bad if it meant they would lead to this. 
After what felt like an eternity of heavy breathing and hot kisses, the two of you finally pulled away, resting your foreheads against one another as you attempted to catch your breath. You glanced up at Beomgyu, a small grin spreading across your face to mirror his own. 
“Hey, do you really want to clean all this shit?” He asked quietly, cocking an eyebrow at you. You shook your head. “Didn’t think so. Let’s get out of here, we’ll just tell them I kidnapped you, or something. You’re the Pres, they’ll believe us.”
Running away now was risking even further punishment, but Beomgyu was right. You were the president, you could basically do whatever you wanted. Besides, you’d spent all day trying to do the right thing, and still, everything had gone wrong. So, why not live a little, right? And why not do it with the cute boy who just confessed he’d liked you since the first grade?
You nodded. “Okay.”  
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permanent tag list: @jakeshands @therealhyunjingf @exohclipse @ttyunz @naveries @mazeinthemoon @luvsoobs @n0-thisispatrick @arizzu @dewyboi @yeonboy
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reasonsmandy · 9 months ago
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Silver Springs
Eddie Roundtree x Fem!Reader
✧.* requested by @navia3000 — hi hi hi!!! i’m OBSESSED with your writing and i was wondering if you could write an eddie x reader story for me! i thought of this in the shower, but basically, reader is the bassist of the band and has been in love with eddie for a long time, but eddie is in love with camila. everyone knows she’s madly in love with him, but he doesn’t seem to realize it. after cami and eddie get together that one night at the bar, and then when they’re talking at the party, reader overhears the whole thing and is really upset because camila and her are very close and she knew that reader loved eddie. camila walks back to the party but sees reader standing there and realizes she heard everything. reader gets mad and stops talking to both eddie and cami, just ignoring them every time they’re around. it gets to the point where cami gets fed up and says some mean stuff to reader about eddie not wanting her in front of everyone else. reader packs her stuff and leaves the band without saying anything, basically just pulls a houdini. some time later, the band is at a festival and the band performing before them is the reader’s and she’s the lead singer, and they realize it’s her and are like omg. reader sings her hit song silver springs (og by fleetwood mac but im pretending its reader’s song) and it’s obvi about eddie. she sings it while staring at him just like stevie does lindsey. and you can end it however you want. i know this is really long and im sorry 😭 i just love your writing and wanna see how you do this. thank youuuu :))
✧.* summary — a fic based on Silver Springs by fleetwood mac
✧.* warnings — Camila being a jerk :(((
✧.* word count — 3.2k
✧.* 🎸 — Eddie's masterlist
✧.* mandy's notes — This was soooo fun to write, I'm just obsessed with this song
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Love is fucked up, and you were living the worst of it since you fell in love with Eddie Roundtree. Of course, it's not about every type of love, but you knew very well that there is nothing as painful as unreciprocated love. It was like being slowly consumed by a feeling that will always be there, and there's nothing you can do to make it stop.
When you guys decided to move to follow the band's dream, it wasn't an easy decision, you were scared to death that you were making the wrong decision but there was comfort in doing it with those you were close to. Now that you were having the chance to create a new album, you felt like it was time for you to grow up in a big way.
The work had been difficult, you spent a lot of time in the studio recording again and again, and only being done when it was perfect. And despite the regrets, you knew that everything was heading towards what you were going to and were living. There is something that was addictive about work, it made you forget about the disaster surrounding your love life, you felt pathetic for futilely insisting on a feeling that had no direction or departure.
You felt yourself falling in love with Eddie when you guys moved to the new town, despite your time performing gigs and also with other gigs out there, you still spent a lot of time together, something that was enough to make you fall in love with him. He was always very kind and understanding with you, even more so when you missed home a lot, slowly as you became closer to each other you couldn't help your feelings anymore… something you just hated.
Everyone knew that he was deeply in love with Camila, including yourself. You knew that when your heart started beating faster everytime he passed by or talked to you, there were several times you tried to hold every feeling back, knowing that it would only lead to heartbreak.
As everyone knew about Eddie's feelings towards Camila, slowly everyone noticed your feelings towards him. Of course there were jokes and teasing (even more coming from Rojas), but it slowly became an unspoken topic that everyone knew but no one said a thing. And you honestly appreciate it!
You had no idea if Eddie knew about it, and you hoped he never did. Because even if you didn't have any hope, or at least tried not to, you wanted to deprive yourself of the look full of pity coming from someone who doesn't feel the same way. Looking to escape all your thoughts, you spent many more hours than necessary in the studio working late, and today was no different.
“God! You're still here?” Daisy says as she opens the studio door, a cigarette hovering on her lips.
“I have a lot to do.” You say shrugging, while giving her a small smile.
“No she doesn't.” You are startled a little when you hear Karen's voice behind you, turning slightly to see her blonde hair.
“Is this some kind of intervention?” Your laugh came out nervously, they look at each other.
“Well, maybe?” Jones gets closer to you, you can smell the cigarettes on her clothes.
“You're working like a dog, so we thought you could come with us to a party?” Karen suggests, her eyes showing her eager for you to agree.
“I don't know guys…” You scribble some things in your notebook, nothing specific other than lines and circles.
“Come on!” Karen holds one of your hands to help you up. “Just try it, I promise that if you don't like it Daisy will take you home.”
“Oh, I will?” Daisy looks at her, you can't help but laugh when you see Karen giving her a threatening look. “Yeah, of course I will.”
You see no escape, so you soon find yourself among a considerable number of people wearing your favorite dress. Karen had been called by a boy to talk better, you hadn't noticed who it was but you knew where she was in case it took too long and you got worried, Daisy was lying on a sun chair around the pool talking to a group of people you had no idea who they were, and you, as expected, were standing there waiting for something interesting to happen.
With your half-full glass in hand, you approach the chairs looking to sit somewhere, your steps stop when you see a familiar figure you blink a few times to make sure you were right, and after a few blinks you confirm that Eddie was there too. Having been alone for a long time and bearing in mind that you wouldn't have company anytime soon, you decide to go to him.
As you make your way into the crowd you see him getting up, you frown trying to get a look at where the hell he was heading to. After a few attempts, bumping into some people and a couple of "I'm sorry" to those who had been pushed past you, you are amazed at what you find. It was unusual to see Camila leaving the house for a party, especially alone, you were immediately surprised, looking around to see if other band members were around.
Well, it wasn't the worst case scenario! At least now you have more company to spend the night with, you continue but immediately notice a different air between them. Your body weakens and your heart races, he gets closer to her and she doesn't step back, you can't help but wonder what the fuck was going on so you decide to sit near them and try your best to hear them.
“Wow, you chose me over sure thing like that?” You barely hear Camila's voice among the others.
“I'll choose you over everyone.” Your heart hurts on your chest, you felt sad.
The silence between them is all you hear even with the noise around you, you turn to see what was happening and bitterly regret what your eyes found. Camila holds Roundtree's face gently, her shaking hands indicated apparent nervousness and her fingers didn't show firmness, she was kissing him.
You couldn't believe what your eyes were showing you, your friend forever was kissing the man you were in love with. It was more than a pain, it was a deep betrayal. You didn't give a shit about the fact that Billy was also being betrayed, he had already done worse to her, but you... She knew your feelings, nothing could justify what your eyes witnessed.
You quickly grab your bag, not bothering to tell Daisy or Karen that you were leaving, you just wanted to disappear.
Knowing that you would eventually have to see Eddie if you returned home, you decide to go to any 24-hour establishment, any place where you could get your head around work in peace. Maybe it was raw feelings, or just lack of attention, but you didn't care if disappearing caused a fuss among your friends. If it were up to you, a complete song would be created that night out of all your frustrations.
When Eddie opened the doors to the house he was surprised to see the lights on, Karen was on the sofa with her hands in her hair and her legs kept moving up and down. He frowns and gives a questioning look to Warren who was eating a banana in the corner of the room, he just takes a deep breath and doesn't give another answer.
“I swear to God, if she's not having sex right she better have a good excuse to just disappear!” Karen utters, Graham puts one of his hands on her back as comfort.
“What the fuck is going on?” Roundtre asks, a little bit worried.
“Y/N, Daisy and I went to a party and she just vanished.” Sirko's blonde locks got messy as she frantically ran her hands through it.
“What?” Eddie widens his eyes, worried. "You left her alone?"
“Are you going to keep throwing things in my face? I know I fucked up, alright.”
“I think we all should take a rest, it's late.” Graham says.
“Yeah, and besides… I'm pretty sure she'll be back tomorrow.” Rojas tries to comfort everyone, and after a while he manages to get them all a little bit more calm.
You were a mess, your hair was a mess, your papers spread across the table were a mess and you didn't even want to look at your face. But you had a song made, lyrics complete, rhythm organized and the guitar and bass part was done, and even with a lot of anguish, you were proud of your work.
You quickly stuff the papers into your backpack, and order a taxi to the house you shared with the band, knowing that you would be scolded for disappearing last night. But honestly, all you wanted was to forget what happened.
“I'm gonna kill you.” You hear Karen's voice and Immediately let out a long breath, she stops when she sees your face. “Bloody hell you look horrible.”
“Thank you very much” You roll your eyes, trying to pass by her, he holds your arm.
“What happened?” You can see she was worried, but you felt pathetic just thinking about saying any of this out loud.
“I can't say it.”
“Bullshit!” She crosses her arms and stops in front of you, preventing you from going forward.
“Fine, I don't want to say it.”
“Where were you yesterday?” She tries once more.
“Writing.”
“You left in the middle of the party to write?” Karen arches her eyebrows, in disbelief. “Without any extra reasons?”
You see Camila approaching, and it takes a lot for you not to cry when you see the person you trusted who had broken your heart so easily. You avoid her eyes, wiping away the tears that escaped.
“Look, I don't want to cause any fuss.” Your voice was choked, your gaze fixed on your foot.
“Karen called me worried yesterday, what happened? Where were you?" Camila comes with her calm voice, you feel a disappointment growing in your core.
“I left, alright?” You say louder than you expected, closing your eyes to take a deep breath. “And I'm leaving.”
“Who's leaving?” Warren's voice comes behind you, he joins everyone. “Hey Y/N, you good?”
“Not really, no.” You give him a small smile, he for sure would be one of the things that made this harder. “I'm quitting the band.”
“What?” They all say together, you swallow hard.
“Why?” Karen was shocked, in disbelief.
“I love you guys so much.” You say between tears, taking a while to pull yourself together. “But I only get hurt lately, and I need time to heal.”
“Who's hurting you?” Warren says in defence. “I'll kick their ass!”
You let out a laugh, “I don't want to cause a mess between you guys, I'm just going to pack my things and go.”
“I don't get it.” Karen says, so lost.
“Just be honest with us.” Camila asks.
“Look, it's fine.” You shrug, holding your bag close to you. “Just like I said, I don't want scandal.”
“You're being ridiculous.” Sirko let's out, frustrated.
“Can I talk to you for a sec?” Camila asks, nodding towards the balcony, you go with her. “What's happening to you?"
“I saw what you did yesterday." Your voice became more choked, you tried hard not to cry. “How could you?”
“What are you talking about?” You can see that she is taken by surprise.
“I saw you kissing Eddie yesterday.” Your vision is blurry with tears. “Why?”
“Look, let's not over react this…” Her voice is lower now, as if trying her best to avoid any attention.
“How on earth am I overreacting?” Slowly you got mad, trying to hold back all your emotions. “All this years I told you how I felt about him, how I bad I felt and yet you… you still did it.”
“Y/N, that's no reason to leave the band.” She avoids the subject. “They need a bass player, you can't just leave when they're recording an album…”
“No fucking reason?” You were shocked, your heart racing. “You don't even care about me, you're worried about the band.”
“Stop being like that.” She rolls her eyes. “It's been years of this, he doesn't like you. I know I did wrong but not with you, with my husband…”
“You think that what you did with me was not a betrayal?”
“I honestly don't think so.” She laughs, and that sents you. “He doesn't feel a thing about you, maybe it's time for you to get over it.”
You cry, your chest hurts. “I'm leaving.”
You turn to leave, knowing that your conversation has been heard by the others when you are met with pitying eyes.
You said you would and you did, you left there and only kept in touch with Karen after a few months of leaving. Little by little you got good opportunities, and over time you joined a band that was having great success.
Your song 'Silver Springs' had been written on one of the most troubled nights of your life and had now become your ticket to glorious days like this one. Festivals were your favorite days, you just loved to feel the audience's energy and sing along with them.
But besides loving all of this, today was being chaotic… You knew you went on stage in a few minutes and your guitar player was extremely drunk, you were furious and extremely nervous.
“Oh my God!” The British accent said each word slowly, you turned to see your ex bandmate with a wide smile heading towards you. “You look amazing! It's been so long.”
You go to her hugging her for a while, after some usual questions like "how have you been?" "How are the others?" "Any news?" She looks into your eyes with her eyebrows showing concern.
“Is everything alright?” She asks.
“Not actually, our guitar player fucked up.” Your voice was filled with nerves. “And we're up soon, I don't know what to do! He is the only one who can actually sing and—
“I could help.” You jump when you hear Eddie's voice behind you, you're body reacting weirdly at the sight of him after so long.
“Hearing our conversations?” You try to hide your small smile. “I see you didn't change, uh.”
“Not a bit.” He gives you a smile and you remember why you fell for him in the first place. “So, what do you say?”
“Do you really know the song?” You wanted to hide the way your body automatically wanted to go to him.
“You kidding me?” He jokes, adjusting his collar. “Everyone knows this song, it's amazing.”
“I'd love your help Eddie, thank you!” Somehow you feel peace between you two.
You feel the lights on your skin as you get yourself ready, amidst the expectant hush of the gathered crowd, the first haunting notes of "Silver Springs" begin to weave through the air. You get to the center of the stage, paying attention to the audience as you let the notes lead you, your presence commanding and vulnerable all at once. Opposite you, Eddie Roundtree appears—a silent sentinel, yet a potent source of the tension that fills the space between you.
The audience goes crazy, everyone knew the rumors about your song and what has inspired you. There was a huge controversy about the release of this song right after you left Daisy Jones and The Six, so when they all see Eddie Roundtree by your side to play it was for sure a fact to cheer for.
As your voice rises, imbued with a raw, piercing emotion, the air seems to thicken. Each word you sing, a testament to love lost and the pain of what could have been, hangs heavy in the atmosphere. Somehow you remember ‘Regret Me’ and how Daisy let out her feelings in the lyrics, you felt connected to her even though you left. Eddie's gaze, intense and unwavering, meets yours. It's a look that speaks volumes, a silent dialogue that only those who have loved and lost can fully comprehend.
You feel the audience’s attention, and your heart softens as you hear their voices sing along with you. As the song goes on, its lyrics casting spells of everything you once felt for the man by your side, the connection between you and Eddie becomes palpable, almost a living thing that reaches out and enfolds every heart in the venue.
With every verse, the space between you seems both to widen and to shrink, a paradox that only deepens the allure of your interaction. It's as if the song is a bridge you're both building back to a moment lost in time, laden with all the things left unsaid. The air vibrates with the tension of the unspoken, the weight of history that both separates and binds you two. It's a tension that speaks to the heartache of love's aftermath, the beauty of art born from pain.
You see in Eddie's eyes curiosity and at the same time regret, you consider looking away, but once you connect like that it is impossible for you to look away. It was like letting your souls show, and dance together. You approach him without taking your eyes off at any time, he accompanies you to the music feeling tense.
As the song reaches its crescendo, a silent conversation occurs in the span of a few heartbeats. It's a moment of vulnerability and power, a clash of emotions that spills over into the audience, leaving an indelible mark on the collective consciousness of the crowd. The applause that follows is thunderous, not just for the technical brilliance of the performance, but for the courage it took to bare such raw emotions in the full view of the world.
“Thank you so much ladies and gentlemen! I hope you enjoyed our show and have an amazing time with my friends… everyone, please welcome Daisy Jones and The Six"
You leave the stage accompanied by your band, you imagined that Eddie would stay on stage to save time, but the touch on your shoulder that makes you turn around tells you no.
“Hey, can we talk?” Eddie says, you can sense his tension.
“But, you guys are up next.” You point to the other band members arranging their instruments.
“I just, I wanted to know…” He holds back, trying to figure out what to say. “I just wanted to know if you still… if you still feel the same way about me.”
You swallow hard, “Do we really have to talk about this?”
“You know I didn't mean to hurt you.” You avoid his eyes. “I really didn't.”
“It's okay, we don't have to talk about it.”
“But I do want to, this song is…”
“Eddie, it's the truth.” You didn't know how to say this in another way. “I was hurt, and I guess I did a good job, because I'm sure you'll never forget the sound of me.”
He avoids your eyes, letting out a chuckle. “Do you think we can be friends?”
“I don't think I'm ready for that.” You say honestly, his eyes, despite being sad, seem to show understanding. “But maybe we'll meet again someday.”
“I really hope so.” He whispers.
“Hey brother, we gotta go.” Warren calls out for Eddie, turning to you. “You guys nailed it up there.” You murmur to him a “thank you.”
“Good-bye guys.” You say goodbye, leaving Eddie with just the sound of your love.
...
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lorebeth · 6 months ago
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Hello. I was wondering if you could make a platonic Honkai Star Rail story with the reader being Jing Yuan's child and but they ended up running away to stay with their mother because they keep messing things up especially after Jing Yuan and the readers mother got divorced. it takes awhile but a few months later the reader suddenly returned to the Loufu because of some disaster where the reader had been living with their mother and Jing Yuan also wanted to talk the reader so he would finally be able to apologize to them especially after he accidentally saw the diary they kept on their computer. (I was kind of inspired by the first episode of The Owl House season three Thank To Them for this request but If you're not not comfortable with writing this that's completely alright and I wish you a good morning/afternoon or goodnight☺️)
I nearly cried bro I accidentally deleted everything I’m gonna sob but I rewrote it!!
IM SO SORRY IVE LITERALLY BEEN DEAD I SWEAR THE SECOND I WROTE FANFICS I GOT YHE MOST DEADLY COUGH OF MY LIFE I WAS SICK FOR THREE MONTHS STRAIGHT 😭😭😭 I HAD WHOOPING COUGH ISTG
My exams started a little while ago too and I had a request before this, I HOPE THIS IS GOOD ENOUGH AND IM SORRY ITS SO LATE OMG I DIDNT MEAN TO DROP OFF THE FACE OF THE EARTH!!!
TW: mention of bad coping mechanisms - no outright mention of sh, yanqing and reader share a sibling bond, jing yuan is kinda ooc in my opinion… I genuinely think there’s a paragraph missing somewhere and a bunch of spelling mistakes so please bare with me 🙏🙏🙏 Yanqing referred to as brother multiple times near the end!!! 
It all started after the divorce. Your grades plummeted and your training sessions with your father became scarce. Your footing during combat was mediocre at best and you found yourself closing off from friends and even your own father.
He was worried about you from the beginning, never wanting you to be at the centre of the messy divorce especially during one of the most stressful weeks at the Luofu no doubt. The IPC had arrived on short notice and demanded immediate attention, leaving your father to worry about not only them but how you felt and your mental state too. 
How he showed his care however… It was not the best. He would make sure others spent time with you in his place, whenever you wanted to see him, you would be notified by a guard or one of his subordinates who would be tasked to hang out with you that he was unavailable and you wouldn’t see him until later. 
This did not make you feel better, instead you got into contact with your mother again, her reaching out and asking to spend time with you. You didn’t know how to feel and had mixed emotions but ultimately coming to the conclusion to give her a chance and slowly working up to a happier relationship with her again. Not only were you disappointed at your father but also your mother. 
She told you all about her new home and how it resembled the Luofu so much, how she would be delighted for you to join her one day. You liked that idea a lot! Especially since you had a feeling that your father’s subordinates didn’t want to babysit you anymore.
You worked on yourself and started training again, this time not with your father. The IPC had left weeks ago and promised to come back to settle matters with your father once and for all. You didn’t care about that though, you still hadn’t seen your father in a week up until the point of training.
“That’s right, Y/N!” Yanqing praised. He had become one of your closest companions and you both had a sibling-like bond: he knew you better than anyone else and you vice versa. He had become your pillar and knew all your secrets, even about the unhealthy coping you had developed and how to better maintain your emotions and habits during the tough days. 
Jing Yuan knew of you two’s training sessions and had guards keep him posted on your location at all times. He didn’t want to admit it, but he kept himself away from you at the fear of being neglectful and disappointing you again. He remembers the last time you both were in the same room, you had begged to play chess with him. He had pushed you away, saying;
“I’m busy, Y/N. Please go find someone else.” 
He in fact wasn’t that busy, he just couldn’t bare to see you and thought you were disappointed in him. He replayed that scenario in his head multiple times the entire week he’s gone without seeing you and at the back of his mind is the broken relationship with your mother. He cannot bring himself to forgive what he had done to your mother to make her leave, and he was worried you would eventually leave him as well. In desperate attempt, he would send you trinkets and clothing to try repair the missing attention he couldn’t give you, but you stopped taking them after a while. His heart couldn’t bare to see you upset at him, so he buried himself in his paper work. Surprising all those around him, especially Fu Xuan. She was extremely impressed and scared. She had no clue when he became so serious about his work and almost drowning himself in it. 
Fu Xuan knew it had to do with you. She was one of your mothers closest friends and knew that you went through one of the toughest situations of all, your parents both fighting for custody and ultimately putting you in the middle of their arguments. She also had to hang out with you in place of Jing Yuan sometimes, knowing exactly how you felt and being able to read you like an open book. She couldn’t help but feel angry at your father, cursing him and his stupidity. For a General, he sure was an idiot for denying you the love and attention you deserved, instead making others give it to you when you instead needed your father.
You fucked up. Earlier this morning in a final attempt to reconnect with your father, you walked in on a meeting of his. You had no clue he had visitors and you went everywhere in the house trying to look for him. He never let you get involved in meetings - stating you were too young and shouldn’t worry about such trivial matters. You tried to respect his wishes every time, knowing he was a well respected figure and you didn’t want to mess that up for him.
“So, this morning I received word from-“ the voice of your father stopped as you opened the door to his private study. His closest subordinates sitting around a table, waiting for him to finish his sentence. Everyone turned to look at you and you felt your face get hot, your knees wobble and tears prick your eyes. You screwed the fuck up. 
“I’m sorry! I was just-“ you couldn’t finish off the sentence, you felt your throat closing up in panic. You made eye contact with everyone, noticing pity and sympathy in their eyes. You hated it so much… But what caught you the most off guard was the hard expression on your fathers face. His eyes calculating and holding an emotion you couldn’t decipher. You wanted to explode on the spot.
Quickly and almost aggressively, you slammed the door behind you, shaking the hinges and wanting the ground to swallow you whole more than ever. 
The look in your fathers eyes. Was he disappointed with you? Did he have enough? Did he not love you anymore? Were you being too pushy about hanging out with him? Why was he looking at you so coldly? You wanted to cry and sob and forget about everything. Go back to the days before the divorce. You wanted everything to be the way it was. Going out with your mother and father, being showered with love and affection, being given small trinkets that your father said reminded him of both you and your mother. 
You felt yourself spiralling again. You needed to go see Yanqing and quick. 
“Oh Y/N…” Yanqing nearly pleaded with you. He knew that look on your face, your swollen eyes and your weak frown, he was immediately sympathetic and knew something bad happened between you and Jing Yuan. 
Yanqing himself considered Jing Yuan his father in a sense too and you his sibling, so he knew you well enough to grasp you and Jing Yuan’s connection. He also loved your mother as his own and the divorce hit him pretty harsh as well. But he understood they fought about you the most, and how helpless you felt. He never held that against you and tried his best to make sure you were safe and as happy as could be, but right now? What the hell happened?
“What happened? Do you want to talk about it?” He held you in his arms as you felt your tears never ending.
“I think father’s upset with me…” you couldn’t help inhale air with small hiccups and double takes, staining Yanqing’s shirt with your salty tears. You wanted to pry away and apologise but you felt too weak and mentally exhausted. You felt stupid and not worth it, not worth your father.
“I’m sure it was all a misunderstanding, Y/N! He loves you, of course he does!” Yanqing offered, he help you tighter and you felt all your emotions explode again, crying harder than before.
“You should have seen the look on his face- he stared and stared with that cold look!” you wrapped your arms around Yanqing’s back and clung onto him hopelessly. 
“I- N/N…” he started, only for you to cut him off.
“Y’know… I’ve been thinking about moving with mother…” you sniffled, having calmed down much more than before. You felt Yanqing freeze around you.
“W-what do you mean?” He uttered in disbelief.
You dropped your arms slowly and looked up at the young boy, wiping your tears and holding his hand in your own. 
“Let’s face it. Things haven’t been the same since the divorce. Father’s been avoiding me like the plague, sending everyone but him to come hang out with me. For Aeon’s sake, he didn’t even come to the park like we always used to on the First Full Moon of the month…” you whispered, emotion turning your voice hoarse and painful, as if thorns were tightening at your throat.
“But- but it could get better! I’m sure if I spoke to him, he’d understand!” Yanqing stared at you with determination in his eyes, his hope shining bright. 
“I don’t think it will. Not after today. I promise to come visit you, I swear it! I just- I don’t want to embarrass myself more in front of father than I already have. I don’t think he deserves that.” you state gently. 
For the first time in a few weeks, you felt excited. Not that hanging out with Yanqing and sending letters to your mother wasn’t fun, but you genuinely wanted some where new to explore, a different atmosphere away from the burden of trying to please a father who couldn’t even bother look you in the eyes. You needed a change of pace.
“I promise I’ll write you to everyday!” You beam at him. The boy looks at you with uncertainty in his gaze and sadness. After losing your mother, he didn’t want to lose you too. But he knew it would make you happier than ever. And plus, he loves reading your spelling mistakes. It’s a win-win in his book.
You had left nearly 3 months ago, keeping your promise and sending voice recordings to your brother and small videos here and there, as well as handwritten envelopes with flowers from the beautiful planet your mother came to. She had told you it’s history and how they had been rebuilding themselves as an Oasis in the making. Her mother, your grandmother came from this beautiful planet and you couldn’t help but notice how similar you looked to the natives here. You felt at home, much more than you ever did on the Luofu.
You hadn’t told you father about your departure, having opted to pack you bags immediately and call your mother, asking for a quick and easy way to travel to her home world. She accepted immediately and welcomed you with open arms.
You eventually told her why you left and she couldn’t help but roll her eyes. “That man wouldn’t know discipline and responsibility if it hit him with the entire Luofu itself! How he’s made it all these years is beyond me. I’m sorry you experienced that my love. I’m glad you’re with me now.” She would scoff at your father’s actions and always pat your head, getting ready to go to work or take you out during her days off. She would also help you record videos for Yanqing and would mention how she missed her son dearly, always calling him hers and asking if he’s been eating well, showing in her own way she cares.
You didn’t want to know about your father and Yanqing never told you, waiting only to tell you when you asked. Which never came.
Eventually, you had made friends with the locals, learned your native tongue and made sure that everyone was happy, having been placed to understudy your mother and work alongside her in the Guild to provide for the elders of the City. You also volunteered to as many soup kitchens as possible and helped with poverty wherever you could. Your mothers home was beautiful but the economy was rather poor, leading to the fittest to provide for the elders and young children. 
You returned home one day after a successful evening at the kitchen only to have received three distress signals from Yanqing and one from your father. You felt sick to your stomach and as if you were about to faint. 
Quickly you opened your signals and heard voice messages come through.
“Y/N! Please! You need to come back to the Luofu right now! It’s Jing Yuan! He’s- he’s been in critical condition since this evening!” 
“Please! Fu Xuan is panicking and it’s throwing me off… I- I don’t know what to do! Please…”
“He’s finally okay! He’s in a stable condition… it’s been hours! Please tell me you’re okay, Y/N! He’s been asking for you… Please return to the Luofu…” 
You didn’t dare open your father’s one. It was staring at you as if cornering you . Ready to eat you alive. 
“Y/N. You should return.” Your mother said beside your doorframe. She had heard everything and wanted to make sure you were okay. 
“I- but…?” You started, only to be met with your mother’s questioning gaze. You knew you should go visit your brother and father, Yanqing was worried and your father could have died. You had to see him. 
“Okay…” you couldn’t help but worry.
The air was different on the Luofu than your mother’s planet. It was crisp, almost as if there was electricity in the air, waiting to strike at any moment. 
As you made your way down the streets to your home, you felt a familiar presence and turned around to see Yanqing running at you full speed, nearly knocking you down ass first onto the pavement. 
“Y/NNN!!!!!” He nearly sobbed. It was endearing and a little too tight of a hug, but you reciprocated.
“Hey there, Yanqing! I’ve missed you.” You felt your eyes tear up. You had truly missed your brother and wanted him to be safe.
“I’ve missed you too. I really hope you’re happy. But..! Please- Jing Yuan- he’s been so tired and I’ve never seen him this restless. You have to go see him.” The boy stopped hugging you to stare at you with complete sadness. 
You felt as if your body was in fight or flight, wanting to drop kick your brother and run for the hills of your mothers home planet. But that would be uncivilised and you’d feel bad later.
“Okay…” you agreed with apprehension.
You had entered your father’s house. Everything was the same way it was when you left. The same colours, same tapestries, even the same stupid old vase you hated and wanted to break on multiple occasions at the ugliness of it. You truly didn’t miss this place one bit but at the same time missed all the memories and the unfulfilled promises. 
As you walked the final step of stairs and walked to the end of the hall, you were met with the door of your father’s bedroom. He had shared it once with your mother and you nearly sobbed at the sight of it. Last time you had been in his room was when you had a nightmare and wanted your mother, having snuck into the bed to be with her. 
You quickly pulled off the bandaid. Knocking softly three times and rethinking doing it again having garnered no reply.
Just as you brought your hand up to knock again, a hoarse voice spoke out. “Come in.”
You felt your stomach do summersaults and wanted to evaporate into thin air. But you had to pull the bandaid off completely, no? 
You opened the door gently and closed it behind you, walking to your father’s bed and having made eye contact with him half way through your walk. His eyes were glassy and he was in his bed with bandages all over his chest, arms and even one on his neck. You nearly broke into tears.
“Y/N…” he uttered softly. His gaze piercing yet soft. He missed you dearly and wanted to reach out desperately to apologise for how he treated you. But you weren’t here to hear his excuses.
 “Father…” you couldn’t hold it back and the tears started flowing again. Jing Yuan slowly rose up and took your hand to his chest, pulling your entire body towards him and laying you on his bed, kissing your forehead and holding you tight. You wrapped your arms around him and kept apologising, remembering how you had left without a word and wanting it all to have been a bad dream.
“You’re my child, Y/N. And I should have treated you better. I did not mean to chase you away or make you feel incompetent. I adore you and you are one of the only good things in my life. My life’s purpose.” He whispered into your hair.
“I- I should have been there when you were upset. I am sorry for neglecting you. I wish I had spoken to you more and kept the relationship.” He held you tighter, as if afraid you would disappear any minute.
“I’ve read your diary, Y/N.” You freeze. Oh shit. He started to pet your head and you feel tears blind your vision.
“Father- you weren’t..!” You can’t finish due to the hiccups taking over your body. He only pushes you away to look into your eyes carefully. 
“I’m sorry I wasn’t there. I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you. You were never the reason me and your mother didn’t work out. You will forever be my top priority, and I am so sorry you felt otherwise. You are my child- my one true love. I will never stop fighting for you, nor your brother. Please, give me one last chance to prove to you my dear child.” His eyes were glassy and he had extreme eye bags, a curtesy of his non-existent sleep schedule. 
You didn’t know how to reply. Of course he still loved you, even after the lack of communication on his behalf and your insecurities leading up to the emotional turmoil in your relationship. 
“You’re my father. Of course I’ll always give you a second chance..” you whisper against him again.
You had a feeling that everything was going to be okay again.
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zbase1 · 1 year ago
Text
kisses with zerobaseone
genre: fluff
warnings: kithing (mwAh), swearing (buckle up lads), slightly suggestive in zhang hao and matthew's sections
author's note: this is my first fic on this blog 😳 hope you guys like it hehe
jiwoong
— confident king 😼😼
— knows how to make you swoon with his expeessions
— i mean, he didn't take all those acting lessons for nothing
— makes it super dramatic every time he wants to kiss you
— "my lips are lonely, mind if they meet yours?"
— "jiwoong is that really necessary"
— smiles throughout kisses AHHHH
— likes to give you forehead kisses before you go to sleep
zhang hao
— i am a firm believer that zhang hao's love language is physical touch 🗣️
— approaches you from behind with a back hug whenever you're cooking
— and he just starts lightly kissing your neck hello?????
— so you turn the stove on a lower setting before turning around to face him with your hands on your hips
— "what do you think you're doing hao?"
— "what i'm just showing my affection" 🤷🏻‍♀️
— but then zhang hao does NOT break eye contact with you and takes a step towards you which makes you very flustered
— he likes to put his hands on your shoulders so he can pull you closer to his body FHJSKDBSK
— i think kisses with hao would be very gentle and romantic
hanbin
— so so so sweet
— always asks for your permission to kiss you and makes sure you are comfortable
— it's also tradition of hanbin's to drive you back home and then kiss you before you get out of the car
— likes to hold both of your hands while kissing you
— holds you so gently honestly you forget your hands are in his
— hanbin's lips would feel so soft
— kissing him would feel like you're floating on a fluffy cloud during a pink and orange sunset
— "y/n you have really pretty eyes"
— "i could say the same about you, hanbin"
— overall so sweet and wholesome im screaming what a gentleman !!!
matthew
— you and matthew would be on a picnic date in this cute little park
— he's cronching on some green grapes obnoxiously (endearingly) loud
— "matthew chill brah you're gonna fucking choke on a grape sooner or later"
— "nuh uh" ☝🏻
— you guys would be lying down next to each other on the picnic blanket, cloud watching
— you feel a pair of eyes watching you instead of at the sky, so you turn your head and matthew's face was RIGHT THERE (jumpscare)
— he just giggles at your reaction and places a hand under your chin and kisses you
— will melt if you play with his hair
— also bonus i think matthew would enjoy french kissing (do what you want with this information)
taerae
— gives you a huge smile every time you guys are about to kiss
— his dimples oh my god
— we must stay focused brothers ‼️
— your favorite thing to do is to distract taerae while he's playing pubg
— "what y/n i'm trying to heal my teammate right now"
— you'd say nothing but just wrap your arms around him and his gaming chair from behind and steal a kiss on his cheek and run away
— taerae would calmly turn around, remove his headset, and bolt after you like a man on a mission
— "GET BACK HERE you made me lose !!"
— i'm sorry but i think out of the members taerae would have the crustiest lips (i say this out of love)
ricky
— ricky is usually too shy to make the first move, but when it came to your first kiss with him, oh boy
— it was the evening before prom and he had a sudden surge of confidence
— you would be getting ready and helping him tie his tie
— naturally, the distance between you two became closer
— you see ricky's eyes staring at your lips
— so you close your eyes, expecting him to kiss you
— until he doesn't.....
— "you know, they call me rizzard of oz"
— "stfu and kiss me ricky"
— also !! ricky thinks it's so cute how you have to tiptoe to reach his height !!
— pro tip: wear strawberry lip balm and he will literally gravitate towards you 🏃🏻‍♂️💨
gyuvin
— blushy baby omg
— loves when you kiss his cheek
— but the first time yall kissed, it was a disaster 😟
— bc the mf accidentally bOnked his head into yours while leaning in
— "oW gyuvin why you gotta be so damn tall"
— "and why you gotta be so short, y/n?? you're closer to hell than i am"
— despite the bickering and Hard fumble, it was a good kiss regardless
— that night, gyuvin giggled to himself and kicked his feet while laying in his bed trying to fall asleep, but he can only think about you
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holybibly · 9 months ago
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idk how this works but i wanted to share smth that has been on my mind since months: sub yeosang.
im not a dom, not even close BUT the idea of having him all whiny and needy of you, like snsnnsjs omg. yeosang is just too pretty but imagine like a disaster just for you. his personality is shy so it maybe can be something that can turn you on, sometimes he needs you so much but can't say it loud so he just gives you little hints of how needy he is for your touch, your kisses, your everything.
making him to beg for your touch too.
also riding him and hear all his littles and shy moans on your mouth while you're kissing his pretty lips 🤭
aaaaa anyways, i love sub yeo so much and sorry for my bad english, it's not my first language :(
OK, let's be gentle, because our Yeosang is such a gentle boy, isn't he? I can also play soft as well.
And don't worry bunny, English is not my first language either, and every time I publish my work I get hysterical at the thought of how many mistakes I might make and not notice.
I think about how you deliberately do things that turn him on, knowing that he will be so shy and coy when he tries to say he wants to fuck you.
He hugs you from behind, hiding his face in the crook of your neck so that you can't see how red his cheeks are and how lost he is for you. He needs you so much; a little touch is all he dreams of.
- Can you lie down with me?"Yosan says it so softly you can barely hear him. His voice is so silky and you want to hear more as he moans and groans beneath you. The most beautiful boy in the world and all yours..
"Anything, baby."
When you get into bed, all that gentle cuddling slowly turns into you riding him. You slowly rub your wet pussy against his beautiful cock, but you don't give him what he so desperately wants. You maintain a slow, painful rhythm, kissing him under his sharp, smooth jaw, admiring the way he begins to fall apart as you touch him in the most seductive and tender way possible..
"Are you feeling good, baby?" His fingers curl helplessly in the sheets as you run your thumb over the sugar-brown bud of his hardened nipple. The sensation of it hits him like an electric shock. 
The swollen head of his dick begins to ooze sperm. This mixes with your juices and makes sliding even more pleasurable.
"Yeah, it feels so good. Please don't stop." He whimpers softly. His plush lips are red with kisses, and a sweet blush blooms on his cheeks. So damn perfect.
With every movement of your hips, the reddened head of his cock slides deliciously against your clitor. It is an exquisite torture that makes him whimper and gasp.
Yeosang looks like an angel in the throes of passion, so magnificent that the perfect features of his face are distorted with pleasure. His beautiful blond hair was scattered all over the pillow like a broken halo around his head. Lord, what have you done that you deserve him?
"P-please, I want to cum so badly. I want you to see how beautiful I look when I cum for you. I beg you." He mumbles something else in a low voice, arching his spine as if his whole body is begging for it as well.
"When you ask so nicely, how can I say no?"
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brilliantfantasticgeronimo · 5 months ago
Text
empire of death thoughts+reactions part 1
previously onnnn (super short sdlkfj)
HOP ON, COWBOY
sdlkjs morris a literal 13 year old having guns on his lil' scooter thing.is UNIT ok.
omg even the vlinx TOT
the birds will sings again!!!!!!
dust of death mmm delicious alliteration
"im sorry there's nothing we can do. we're dead" vibes
loving this action sequence ngl
WATCHA TALKING ABOUT
maybe is not [insert character]. maybe mrs flood is just an old lady who is Like This.
"my true name" "ur true maker" whats her true maker if not RTD!!! / clowning
"we've got worse problems" that's gonna come back to bite him skdfljdskl
does anyone remember the clara / 1 paintdoktahwho comic "dont take that one. take the tv"
thats what im thinking ot
(askdjlad UGH my iplayer stopped so i refreshed and while skipping to the place i think i spoiled my self for susan ?? TOT sutpid internet stupid preview skipping thumbnail function grrrr) im not a tardis smasher in general but the memory tardis….. would. maybe
"remember it harder" i would be a useless companion here tbh. memory of a goldfish.i would doom the earth.
IT'S A TV SHOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
IT'S TELLING THE STORY OF YOUR LIFE
I MADE A JIGSAW OF YOUR HISTORY SDKLFJSLKJF
AAAAAGHHH
sdflkdfj sutekh spining in the vortex. 2 cute
the temple……….. tardis as the thing in the hill meta INTENSIFIES
"so many secrest" um TIMELESS CHILD FUGITIVE MEMORIES FOBWATCH????
oh ok i jut got spoiled for the clip OF susan sdlkfjdskl FALSE ALARM FOLKS
"never yours again, never"
my angels of death………………..
"i find that good" i feel they did this same exact phrasing once for a "death is beautiful" monster like this but i cant remember which story?
also, flux? flux anyone? 13 vs entropy itself?
"i am an extinction event" OOF
(oh this clicks on why the doctor clings sm to living / immortality despite how much it hurts)
memory is a time machine TOT idk but that Hits Harder
"sutes" dlkjfslfk cute
"and doesnt it feel good?" holy shit
yayy mel's not dead yet
MEL GRABBING SIX'S COAT IM FINEIM FINE IM FINE
(idk why but that's what's made me cry slkfjsd)
"ruby roo" sdkljsfd
lasdkj if a regular tardis is 6 people driven then a memory tardis is probably meant to be piloted by every single doctor and companion ever
"meleanie b" TOT (doctor trait unlocked: when 15 is stressed he intensifies on the cutsey nicknames)
CHEKOV'S INGELLITEN GLOVE !!!!! damn i thought for a second about putting that on my bingo card but didnt skldfj
i like that the subtext of "when disaster comes, he's there" / "the tardis is an ommen of death" & "he has one constant companion… death" isn't literally being stated as being "sutekh did it lol" lol cause that would feel a lil cheap. i think instead rtd took a smarter choices of keeping that subtext, but keeping it that stricly speaking what sutekh did was just putting the susan copies everywhere.
73 yards……………
omg wait so in a memory tardis u can remmeber anything to existence………….. what if heiimagines susan at the end
(MOLECULAR BOND ROGUE CALL BACK?)
73 yards…………. HOW DO U KNOW THAT. I JUST DO. SHE'S JUST GOOD AT CONVERTING UNITS DAMN. LET RUBY BE GOOD AT UNIT CONVERSIONS DOCTOR.
ohh wait so this connects perception filters and 73 yards. put on a pin on that (and presumably……. taking down the perception filter is what happened re: ruby? that's why people ran away? people saw beyond her perception filter to the elderitch abomination bellow?)
"you've landed on earth a 100th times" is probably a huuude understimation lol
"she was reborn stronger each time. this monumental figure" dr. who as a cultural institution meta
shots outside the tardis my beloved
1999….. the movie... 2005 …. obvious. 1066 was the fire of london right? with 5?
this is rlly working for me ngl. dr who is all about death meta but it's literal but it's not
and a lso the whole. when u are a time traveler everyone is already dead. we must be like ghosts to u . etc etc
telos… THE OOD SPHERE noooo
mel being like "well…. at least 1% of the universe is fine. that's all right then" .
this |5 "it's all my fault" beat feels a lil' weird until u remember [all the traumas] / flux trauma and then it's like yeah i getchu doc i too take everything bad that happens as proof that it is my fault even tho, factually, it makes no sense as a reaction. trauma/depression girlies united.
THE SUN IS DEAD. rip 42's sun.
omg thank u sutekh for finally fixing that over-blue colorization in the unit set. not all heroes wear capes tbh.
aaaand the end.
fade to black.
doctor who is done! we can all go home and become trekkies everybody. congrats!
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spaceagebachelormann · 2 years ago
Note
im back hehehehehe could i get some headcanons of like. dating mischa. or ricky- either one- i <3 them sm
dating mischa and ricky
pairings: ricky potts x gn reader, mischa bachinski x gn reader
warnings: mentions of the rollercoaster disaster
a/n: i’ll give you both because ily liz <3
masterlist
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Ricky Potts
okay so
UHHHH
he’s really sweet!!
100% randomly comes to your house and signs something like “wanna go stargazing”
you WILL say yes.
when you’re stargazing he doesn’t actually look at the other stars, because his star is beside him <3
you best believe his cats love you
they love you more than they love him
sometimes they just walk straight past him to get to you <3
i like to think he has a thing for noses, so when he’s close enough he’ll just lean in and kiss it so gently <33 or poke it
i feel like he gets tired really easily and stays up until like 3am
and because he loves you and he feels comfortable with you he leans his head on your shoulder and falls asleep!!
during the cyclone disaster, my man was holding your hand so hard and trying to keep you (and himself) from falling out of the cart
long story short it didn’t work and you fell together
back to the sweet stuff!!
you know all of the zolar lore and characters and give him stickers for his crutches
between classes he runs (runs??? he gets to you as quickly as he can with his crutches) and hugs you so tight
calls you the most random things ever
turkey-chicken-leg, monkey-love-drop (ofc <3)
im sorry but he would have called you kitten at one point. joke or not he 100% would have once. someone had to say it
i do think he’d call you love though
he loves you!! so much!!
penny aka his bestie has had to listen to him talk about you for hours
he’s very clingy!! constantly touching you in some way or is always near you
lightly hits you with his crutches when you say something outta pocket or questionable
your parent(s) LOVE him
he has that “anything for you love! <3” mentality and your parent(s) can tell this!! they know hed do anything for you and it’s why they love him!!
omg binge watching movies that take place in space with him <3
he gets so absorbed into the plots and points out every little thing
he’s so cute
will CRY (happily ofc) if you learn sign language for him
oh!! you’d also have a way to communicate from across the room if you can’t speak directly
like you’ll be visibly uncomfortable or tense and he’ll give you a concerned look or something to ask if he needs to come over there
i think he would be really protective, glaring at anyone who makes you uncomfortable and sometimes protectively putting a crutch or arm in front of you
incorrect quote!!:
Ricky: you want some leftovers?
Y/N: what are leftovers
Ricky: you’ve never had leftovers?
Y/N: no, im not a quitter
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Mischa Bachinski
dear lord
the most overprotective soul ever
has body slammed ocean for looking at you weirdly…
will fight someone for you
just ask
also has that “anything for you love! <3” mentality but it’s more aggressive like “ANYTHING for you, love.”
oh he definitely uses you as an armrest
i like the idea of him and his s/o having a mean/nice dynamic
he’s mean to literally everyone except you
he’s also the type to put things on a shelf you can’t reach just so you have to ask him for help
sometimes he just picks you up in the middle of class and runs away while the teacher is screaming at you guys to come back
only listens to you
ocean: mischa no!! | mischa: mischa yes!! | y/n: mischa no | mischa: mischa no.
writes autotuned songs about you
okay but like imagine being his sweet sunshine s/o and one day someone pisses you off enough that you actually yell at them and he’s standing there with his jaw dropped and eyes widened
whispers over to noel “i love them.”
noel whispers back “i know.”
randomlt shows up at your house
if he can’t get in through the front door he scarily climbs through your window
SLEEPOVERS ARE A MUST!!
secretly the little spoon when you cuddle during sleepovers but don’t tell anyone
smiles into your neck, but pretends he doesn’t even though he knows you can feel it <3
it someone talks smack about you
well….
they mysteriously disappear that night
and when they come back they don’t even look in your direction again
he’s actually very sweet with you!!
holding your hand, cupping your face, whispering sweet little nothings in your ear <3
brings you alcohol on your birthday…
incorrect quote:
Mischa: *kicks the door down looking panicked*
Y/N: what did you do?
Mischa: nobody died
Y/N: WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT???
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loquarocoeur · 12 days ago
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THE PLAYLISTS!! here are my in-depth thoughts about yours verse playlist bc this ask would be even more horrendously long 1. "risk" by gracie abrams is first of all such a good song, second of all it fits them so well and i cannot believe i didn't see that.
2. "CHEMTRAILS OVER THE COUNTRY CLUB" by LANA. FREAKING. DEL. REY. "drag racing my little red sports car; i'm not unhinged or unhappy, i'm just wild" and "it's beautiful how this deep normality settles down over me; i'm not bored or unhappy, i'm still so strange and wild" you are SO right
3. "naked in manhattan" is my favorite chappell roan song and that's all OKAY AND. AND. here are other songs i can see being yours coded bc i have too much time on my hands 1. "bad idea!" by girl in red (i think i have the right to say this as a lesbian idk.. seeing the amount of smut in the fic itself it's fitting)
2. "disaster" by conan gray (the second half of the chorus especially reminds me of the first chapter with drunk max)
3. "bang bang" by momma (this one is um. horny)
4. "a big brown dog named bagel" by nep (THIS ONE ESPECIALLY!!!! best 4 last. it gives charles pov and also the pet fics imo :,) ) okay i am SO SO sorry for yapping sm and writing a whole essay, i feel entitled i swear im not insane, i'm just very passionate about music as u can prob tell. i gave it colors if that helps. i don't have any smut to offer here only vibes and kinda horny songs, but for the anons going wild in ask box i salute u!
Omg yes, I know I wrote a whole fic called casual, but naked in manhattan is THE best currently released chappel roan song
And omggg you're so right with your recs actually I can't even explain, just everything about them you're righttt🥺🥺 Gonna be having so much fun dissecting these lyrics now I can't even quote the good parts at you there are too many
And I'm gonna be honest I appreciate non smut asks SO much bcs like I do love the horny but we also need a teeny bit of balance and I treasure the increasingly rare PG asks🥰🥰
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doitforbangchan · 11 days ago
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Hi, honey bun! I love your fanfics especially ABANB. I apologize in advance for my english because I'm not native speaker.
You described threesome in several chapters of ABANB with, of course, baby and alpha&beta/beta&beta. But what about threesome with two alphas or foursome with 3 alphas (and double penetration in one hole, yeah my thoughts are kinda filthy and gross maybe)?
You also described how Jeoning behave himself in rut and how Baby experienced that. But what about Chan and Changbin?
What do you think about it?
P.S. so many questions. I'm sorry for it. If you feel uncomfortable, don't answer.
hi darling nonnie! thank you so much for reading im happy you enjoyed it!
in a previous ask i delve a little further into alpha on alpha but to add on to it i think that multiple alphas with one omega would be a recipe for disaster. They would each be possessive of their omega that sharing with each other might be out of the question. im not gonna say its totally impossible, like if it was binnie and innie together since bin is much more laid back than the other two alphas.
omg poor omega struggles to take one alpha dick can you imagine taking two in one hole!?!? girl would NOT be able to take it without a ton (and i mean a TON) of prepping and even then it may only be achievable when shes in heat.
ive touched on the alphas ruts before, you can check out those out from the links ive included 💕💜
Here, here, here , here,
thank you sm for asking lovey
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etherealspacejelly · 5 months ago
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hi i just stumbled across your post about environmental hope (posted june 6). i'm currently working on a final paper for my class focused on environmental hope, and i didn't know what direction to take it, but i got inspired by the post and i think i know what i want to write now. would you be alright with me (potentially) citing your post in my essay?
(sorry this is so out of the blue lol, just wanted to check first. i also might not end up citing it because it's for a philosophy class, but still)
omg??? i would genuinely be honoured????
if its the one i think it is, in response to that tweet about all dying together in a climate disaster, then i literally wrote it on a whim. i saw that post and it made me so mad i just had to smash out a response and hopefully share some hope with people. i never realised it would reach as far as it has.
if you check the reblog tree thing for that post on desktop it shows that my version of that post has like 3 times the reblogs than the version without my addition. its so humbling to see how many people have resonated with and been comforted by my words
so yes, you absolutely have my permission. that would mean the world to me. even just the fact that you asked made me a little emotional lol
im so glad that my words inspired you and helped you with your essay, regardless of whether you end up citing me or not :)
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strugglingatart · 10 months ago
Text
Jr year ep 2
This is me live blogging bc I need to get thoughts out also would love fandom friends full spoilers bellow the cut just so no one accidentally reads anything they don't want to this will be long
No shenanigans at the begining way lowkey sad I love our intrepid heroes being dumb
Siobhan and Zac kick it off with SUCH good turns straight away we love (also emily's cutting words? delicious)
Them all discussing more stuff mid battle is so nice I love but also not Ally forgetting they could try to heal lol
"playing with you all at level 10 has never convinced me more that this game is unplayable at level 20. fucking unplayable" Brennan the man who I 100% have seen play att level 20. But we HAVE to stan the complaing I love them so much Murph especially I always laugh so much
Siobhan please we cannot be confident before rolls they go bad then
we were doing so well like seconds ago and now everything feels terrible
ARMOR OF AYDA omg my loves
Kristen and Riz are me when my friends are being to sexual but also Kristen please remember you and tracker?
NOT FABIAN FALLING AGAIN, and his idea was real good as well, but Ally yeeting the dice also a big mood
Lou's sass was so good I love im so much
only one person saving out of everyone is brutal why do dice currenntly hate them
Murph loosing it at Ally's saving throws being empty is so funny, and poor them gatting so defensive (also have they been doing it wrong this whole time then? has it never been written down? was is just a mistake on their season prep?)
Zac and Lou killed that look at me bit I'm sorry they are geniuses
I truly thought Brennan was gonna make this fight SO much easier and in many ways I get why he didn't but I'm not over it
Listen Murph is looking SO GOOD this season it legit distracted me for a few seconds I had to go back to understand what Brenan said about the van flipping I am a disaster queer through and through
this is so intense all of a sudden omgggg
Poor hangvan ily and know Gorgug will fix you tho
Oh no Kristen, but also the die deadass turned on them, sad vibes (also I miss good rolling Murph I know we had him for one ep but I loved him)
once again yeeting the dice is a mood and then the whole if i hit anyone bit, art tbh
AHHHHH that nat 1 followed by a nat 20 was magical, also Em is wearing the naddpod live shirt 😍 I was 110% with her tho I wanted Gorgug to get it so bad so that deception roll was EVERYTHING TO ME, Ayda claming Gorgug as the greatest wizard is legit one of my favorite things whenever they bring it up and support that theory my heart is so happy
Brenan just being like yes these npcs i made up for the media res are just for that they will die even if they don't
Zac has what healing thing? again not knowing enough about DnD makes me bad at knowing who can do what
shoutout to the two crew
listen this theme of exaustion specifically with school will end me like i cannot it hits too close
Moggy the doggy! we stan Adaine the little guys guy(gal?)
Did Cassandra text you? Nonstop
this flourish lacks flourish (me giving the finishing touches to art projects for university)
LISTEN Fig asking about first day of school outfit was literally Emily choosing violence omg I felt that deeply
I still have jump and i haven't used it so I'm just gonna... I love Zac
They all LOOSE IT at two more guys and I know it was mostly the players but honestly having an absolute laughing fit out of exaustion is another big mood and I felt both seen and called out (I have STROIES about this) and like it just fit the theme so well
there's two nat 1's, Lou's full discociated, Murph's loosing it, it's pure chaos for a bit but whoever did the closed captions? A+++ job
Kristen taking ths ice cream sandwich out and going to the hangman is gold (also I remember the pouch of ice cream sandwiches existing like I fully remeber Kristen usinf it before but i don't remeber when/where she gets it despite having just rewatched both freshman and sophomore years and it's bothering me)
I want the so tactical so late t-shirt
Fabian passed so I legit thought that was gonna work but you know what? it's funnier that it didn't
"I was a turncoat the whole time" is so funny for no reason, also Fabian babe, ily but like why do you wanna kiss a mirror it will not be enjoyable (also at this point Lou is either feeding into all the comp-het queer theories or is like the queer whisperer)
The father the son and the balthazar made me cackle
I have said this before in a post somewhere but while I get where Kristen is coming from so much like truly I'm right there with her but also I kinda hate how she's avoiding Cassandra but also I get it baby but also pls do better (or at least change tactics in odrer to to it lowkey unhealthily)
Fabian I promise you you can do better LMAO Riz, you are correct
Again to me Fig's hypothetical is like fighting words I'd be pissed and depressed
But also high school me would have loved a dance camp tbh (also to be able to dance in general rip my dancing dreams, taken away by a chronic issue and over protective parents)
"I think I do a really half hearted prayer of healling just because I don't.. trust you" I love Ally so much
ah yes the silliness is back but they are so tired
wanna stay at our place? we have so many beds
The entire ecaf bit was so good i cannot deal
Hallariel is saying Fabian's name more like the elves or am I tripping?
Gillear is slightly less pathetic! he won a cruise! oh and they are engaged, full step sibblings Fig and Fabian
also poor Fabian like he needs his parental figures here... Cathilda better stay or I'm personally gonna have words with Brennan, stop making them suffer they fuck up things alone
ALSOOO there is no way Gillear would not want to talk to Fig omg I'm fighting brennan again
Gillear luck... did Fig uncurse him by taking that deal and is she about to get his bad luck?
SKLONDA we stan
Brennan I swear to god this tiny goblin has saved the world three times what do you mean he cannot go to college I will fight you, this scene hit me so hard omg we were promised silliness not heart wrenching reality in my fantasy
I think Zac legitimately forgot the mirror didn't run away for like a second which makes it funnier but Fig IS just that good. 32 decepetion fool the character and the player
BRENAN what do you mean Zelda gave back his stuff this is DURING the seven where they are still TOGETHER I swear I will riot
Frosty fair mentioned twice it's connected to or the big thing this season
The Thistlespring are SO PRECIOUS
Jawbone and Sandra Lynn made a cake I can't deal, and it's belated birthdays omg the way I would cry
THE RAGH AND LYDIA ART IS SO GOOD
the justaposition of Emily's cackle and Ally's face to the dangers Fig and Kristen are dangerously and/or wildly close to being expell is so good
Lou choking on water at "we're allowed to fail a certain number of classes each semester" also real good treiler editing bc I thought that was 10000% connected to the you let your god die line that comes right before it on there
Fig's been multiclass since start of sophmore year, does she do warlock classes sometimes I wonder
I like that Jawbone is not judging here he's just like facts: you are failing and this is why, now we can see what we do about it
ouch that whole im swimming my head is liquid kristen thing felt dangerously close to me... I usually relate to gorgug and riz like i adore kristen but she's never me what is happening (this is not bad just me having like my 10th identity mini crisis this year)
THE AYDA ART she looks so bummed but so pretty.. but also Brenan I feel like I said I'll fight you a couple of times here but if we get no ayda I will fly to LA and fight you
I reached text limit will do a part two
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