#god this got so wordy. sorry about that. but i have Thoughts

[kneelingshadowsalome]

Hi !!!! I’m sorry if this is bothering you and if so you can totally ignore this but…

I’ve been thinking about how Ghost would react to reader gradually pulling away from him because she gained some weight and is self conscious and ashamed and doesn’t want to be seen by him, so sculpted and beautiful… but of course he’s feeling low because he wants to be close to reader and so he asks and she finally explains it to him (ready to be broken up with…)…. And I’d love to read your take on it !

You can make it female or gender neauteal I don’t really care !!!! Thank you anyway ❤️❤️❤️❤️

Wildflowers Grow in Ruins

(Ghost x F!Reader, word count: 5 k)

Summary: Reader tries to break up with Ghost because she thinks she's not good enough for him.

Tags/warnings: FLUFF, soft sensual smut 🔞, hurt/comfort, light angst, Jealous!Ghost, Soft!Ghost, self-loathing & self-body shaming. Good girl talk/praise kink. Reader is female and wears a skirt for smut plot purposes.

A/N: I hope you like this take & I hope you don't mind that I tweaked this request just a little bit!) Also: JFC I'm wordy. The "I need to explain why they're fucking!" meme comes to mind every time I write anything.

Wars are exhausting. 

You know fighting for something can empower people. Fighting against something usually just depletes your strength.

But waging a war against yourself… 

Now that is pure hell. 

It started somewhere in your youth. You thought adulthood would take it away; that reason and tolerance would take it away. You were supposed to feel more confident in yourself, more positive about life. And for a moment, you thought you might just succeed.

But standing beside a god of war is no easy feat.

He came into your life like a walking myth, swept you away, and you only laughed as you went. It was fun at first. He was supposed to be your savior, the solution to all your problems. If a man like him found you attractive, perhaps it was the world that was crooked and not you.

But then you got soft: you started to gain pounds. Meanwhile, he became even more magnificent. It reminded you that it had all been just a dream.

Perhaps it was his eyes that seemed to worship you, that seemed to look past your every flaw. Perhaps it was the hands which never seemed to get enough of your skin. Whatever it was, it was too much. And at the same time, never enough.

The day has finally come to let him go.

You think yourself heroic. It's like it should be: it's only right that you finally release him to someone better than you.

But inside, the noble feelings twist and turn and curl around your throat and stuff your stomach full of ice - the kind they fill glasses of mojito with. The drink you'll always remember him by because he teased you about it: that you wanted an ice-cold summer drink even in the middle of winter.

Now you feel cold all over, and wish he could warm you like he used to. 

You would forsake all the mojitos of the world to keep him. You would renounce the whole drink if it came to that; if you could make him yours.

But he's not yours. He never was: he was just on loan to give you a taste of what it would be like to have a man like him. That taste should be more than enough for a lifetime. You should feel grateful.

So why is it so hard to let go?

The key on the front door turns, and your heart shoots up your throat: you're supposed to settle this thing once and for all. You're supposed to let go of him today. 

And still, when he arrives, you can't find the courage to say what you need to say. The words are stuck in your throat, but tears are not. He should already be a memory, but you find yourself suffocating on memories as you cry. You've learned to do even that in silence, like the rest of your suffering.

You take a few deep breaths, wipe the tears away, shove the rest of them down your throat – you save them for later, later, when he's far away and you can finally curl up and cry your heart out without no one there to look. Fucking later.

Good. 

Good.

Great.

You put your heaviest armor on. It protects weak and soft flesh because you can't meet him all bare. Then you step forward with the knowledge that you’re a thoroughly wounded guerrilla while he is a seasoned, well-rested veteran. The fight is nowhere near even, but it's ok. You are not meant to be in the presence of immortals anyway.

The man looks at you warily as you finally enter the room. That haunted look has followed you for some time now as the distance between you has grown. 

It should be easy, what is about to come, because he hasn't touched you in weeks. You haven't wanted him to.

Or you have… But it's not easy to have his hands on you when your body is only a vessel you hate. How can you even think about pleasure when all you think about is how it must feel for him to caress something as awful as this?

The man is a vision, and he settles for a peasant. It should be against the law, but it's not… so you figured a some time ago that you should simply find the strength and grace to do ii: do what's right.

"I need to talk to you." 

Your voice comes out neutral, and it makes you more confident, if only for a second or two.

He lifts his chin: already knows what's coming, because he's not stupid. You've been shutting down for weeks, and he hasn't done much about it. But when the thunder rolls in, he doesn't flee. Probably because he fears nothing.

"Go ahead then," he says, equally as neutral, equally as icy. Got his armor on, too. 

This should be easy…

It's really not, so you decide to rip the band-aid off in one yank.

"I think we should go separate ways."

The following inhale from across the room pierces the air like a bullet. You can hear his breaths gain depth and speed all the way to where you're standing.

"Ok."

It doesn't look or sound like he's ok. If anything, he looks like he's trying to process the sudden storm. 

"Ok…" His eyes are on the floor as he rubs the back of his neck. Then he starts to pace around the little kitchenette you've shared for almost six months, just before you started gaining weight.

He stops to look out the window, then turns to you, and the hurt in his stare comes through like a thousand needles pushing through skin.

"Is it because of my work?" 

"No."

"What is it then?"

Your breaths are getting out of hand, too. He looks like a lost, tired creature in an abandoned animal shelter for a moment, and it breaks your heart. It squeezes the organ inside a flaming fist until it shatters like it has never been nothing more than ice.

Your lip starts to tremble, and he notices, as per usual. Nothing escapes this man, except perhaps the true reason for your anguish.

"Hey. Hey."

He comes to you and hugs you like it's the only thing that matters: to comfort you when he sees you're about to cry, no matter how crushed he's feeling himself. The sudden warmth, the intimacy after weeks and weeks of pain is knee-buckling. 

"Is there anything I can do to change your mind?"

His voice is soft, so soft… The tears rush forth now; there's no way of stopping them. What the hell can you even say to a question like that? That you wish he could grab a magic wand and turn you into someone gorgeous, the woman he deserves?

His embrace feels good, kind of. It also feels smothering because your self-hate makes you want to disappear from existence entirely. His eyes are equal to physical touch, a probing scan that sees every little flaw, not to talk about massive faults, the ones which make you feel like you're simply disgusting. His touch only reminds you how you must feel like to him: soft, too soft, weak.

And he must hate weakness.

"What do you need me to do? I'll do anything," he tries with a parched throat, then swallows. 

It's fucking horrible. This isn't going at all like you had imagined.

"It's not about you," you struggle out of his hold, and he lets you go with reluctance. You have to basically fight your way out of a bone and steel prison. Why would he even want to hold a pathetic woman who's on the brink of ugly crying on top of everything?

"What do you mean?"

He's slightly breathless – and restless as fuck. He's usually so calm; nothing can get to him, nothing can rattle the tower of raw strength. Now you've not only pierced some invisible armor; you can hear pieces of it falling on the floor.

"Have you found someone else?"

What the…

"No." You put as much weight on that word as you possibly can. To imagine that he thinks you are cheating… Fucking cheating on someone like him. "Jesus Christ…"

He takes a deep breath and sighs deeply, sighs out relief, perhaps. Then his razor-sharp stare fixes on you again, and you can see the fear turning into something akin to concern. You suspect you have to tell him the truth, otherwise he will dig it out of you. 

"I'm just…" 

Jesus, this is just humiliating. 

"I'm just not your type."

"What the hell are you talking about," he mutters, the impending fury giving way to momentary surprise. 

He gets intense sometimes. This time, the ferocity is born of barely concealed distress. He's broad and magnificent, even in despair. He’s just so fucking fine… The perfect man, someone you had never even imagined yourself with. Pulled down to the world of puny mortals, evidently stressing about losing one. 

Losing you.

"If you have someone new, you can just bloody well tell me."

"It's not that. You don't understand–" 

"Try me."

"I just…" A tear escapes down your face as you finally break for him. "I'm fat. Okay? And ugly. And–"

"Stop right there."

The look on his face is just… It's priceless, you suppose.

"Bloody fucking hell…" 

He looks at the floor, then runs his fingers through the short cut hair on top of his head. You've yanked those blonde strands more times than you can count, nearly every time he's been between your legs, and you miss it – you long for it, like fallen angels long for heaven. 

And if there was a time this man was rendered speechless, you would say you were witnessing that moment right now. His brows knit together, then he looks up at you again with blaring disbelief.

"You're serious?"

"Yes."

"This is the reason you wanna break up?"

Ugh.

"Yes?"

His voice grows rougher with every question until it resembles thunder, and you suspect this is the commanding tone his soldiers are used to hearing. 

But you're not: it's gravelly, harsh, and betrays the feeling of having been insulted. You feel even more devastated with yourself – it appears you can do nothing right.

"Where has this… idea even come to your head?"

"I don't know." 

"And you never thought to ask my opinion?"

"Would you please stop yelling," you whisper and blink back some putrid tears. His mouth is snapped shut, his head pulls back just a little as he realizes what he's done. 

"Sorry," he says with a half-whisper, and you catch the strain in his throat. You've never seen him cry, but now his voice is suddenly thin and frail. "I'm sorry."

He takes a step, then another, places fingertips on the counter as if to take the faintest support.

"Can I touch you?"

You don't really want him to do that, but you feel pity for the man. He's trying to find a way through this mess, and you want to help him.

"Yes," you whisper, and he immediately comes and takes you in his arms again. Hot tears disappear into his shirt, and you sniff a few times. He feels so good, so safe, even when you're about to lose him. His hold tightens around you, and the kitchen is silent; the whole world is silent. You don't know if you're being put to a grave or if you're in a deaf womb, waiting to be reborn.

"Now I don't know who's said this shite to you but ugly is the last fucking thing I'd call you," he declares above you. As if it was some bully whose fault it is that you were this way, a bully he could deal with with his fists or a gun. If only things were that easy…

"Have I said or done something? To make you feel this way?"

Then the blade is turned against himself. The man desperately searches for a culprit so he can deal with them.

"No," is the only thing you can say because it's true: he has never done a thing to make you feel like you weren't good enough; quite the contrary. But then again, he doesn't have to. It's enough that he exists and resembles a god.

"Then why do you think you're not my type?"

"Because you're so perfect," you hear yourself wail, no, cry into that shirt that smells of sweet safety and familiar musk – his scent, another thing you have missed like it's the only way to heaven.

"That for sure ain't true."

"But it is."

He seems to have the utmost difficulty in grasping what the issue here is. You can almost hear the wheels turning in his head with a rusty, laborious creak.

"Can't believe you wanna break up because of this," he finally says. You've chipped his pride, the ego that lives off of pleasing the ones he loves: the few chosen ones who he wants to give his whole life to. 

"To me, you're perfect," he then says, and you simply… You stop breathing. "You're like… my dream woman. Ever thought about that?"

It can't be true, even if you vehemently, desperately want it to be. You reach out to his words like they're precious food after years of famine. Like they're sun and spring rain after being buried in the cold, dark soil whole winter.

"No…?"

"Never occurred to you that I might find you fucking beautiful?"

"Stop," you whisper, because it's too much to take in. He sounds so serious, so sincere.

"No, I don't think I will."

He pulls back a little and cups your face. Brushes away a tear, looks at you with so much love that it physically hurts; you feel like it's a lance that slowly drives through your heart.

"How about I kiss every part I love about you?"

You let out a soft little whimper. Fuck, that you want him to… 

It would also be uncomfortable as hell. To try and let him love you and your body, which you have grown to loathe.

"It's gonna take all night, though. Wanna be as thorough as possible."

"Simon–"

"Love. I want you. Thought I'd made it pretty clear, but apparently I haven't. If you only knew how much–"

He sighs deeply. The man is frustrated with his shortcomings, thinks that this is all his fault. You cry a tear or two just for the sake of how absurd it all is. 

"I don't want you to go. I fucking love you. Everything about you."

For the second time this afternoon, your lower lip starts to tremble as if this was some stupid, romantic movie. He can be so soft when he wants to, more romantic than the soft-spoken gentlemen in Jane Austen's novels. It doesn't even require any effort: underneath the cynical surface, there's fiery emotion, so powerful and raw that it almost bleeds out of him. Fuck… Does he even know what he's doing to you?

"I love you too," you whisper back, and the warmth that starts to bloom in his eyes is an entire sun on its own. It's hope, and you believe him, almost believe him.

"Then I'd say it's a bloody bad idea to break up."

You chuckle while few more tears push through to the surface.

"Simon…" You sigh and look back up at him, your armor falling to the floor too. "I feel like a wreck."

You allow him to see the pain, all of it. His breath is sharp as it hits him, but he still doesn't waver.

"Then let me help you."

The arms around you gain more strength, and you're crushed against a chest made of power. He tries to turn shit to gold, and threatens to succeed. You allow yourself to soften in his hold. How good it feels to be supported – no, loved.

"You don't even let me touch you anymore."

It's a filed complaint, but also heart-rending, soul-wrenching longing. You have evaded him for weeks now – hell, this shit began months ago and has escalated gradually, stealthily, until the moments together were a rarity, the space between you was full of frost; and not the crispy, happy summer drink kind.

"I thought you'd found someone else. Could've found out if that was the case in minutes, but honestly, I didn't wanna know."

Oh my God…

Has he lived with a growing suspicion and dread all these months? 

That would explain why he has avoided you too…

He has allowed you to go to your supposed lover, has given you space to be alone and without too much attention. The man has shielded himself from pain. 

Jesus fucking Christ.

"I'm so sorry," you say with a strained little breath. "I swear it's nothing like that. I just… I feel like a mess."

"Never seen such a gorgeous mess." 

He speaks on your skin, the kiss on your forehead feels like an absolution. 

Then you notice it's not only his words which try to assure you. He's growing harder by the minute against your stomach, just from a simple hug. Just from being pressed against you like this, after weeks of dry, bitter longing.

"Miss your taste," he murmurs to your skin, his voice like sand wrapped in burning velvet. "The sounds you make when you want it hard."

Oh God–

"Miss your smile when we go to shower after."

"Hmh…"

"Don't wanna live without that smile."

You don't have to. 

God, you don't have to…

"How about we make a deal," he draws fingers down your chin, coaxing you to look up at him. His eyes are stripped from the cold distance that greeted you just moments ago: now they are filled with warmth that spreads to your chest and belly and bones. You drink him in like summertide.

"You come to me every time you feel bad and I'll make you feel good. Alright?"

"...Ok." 

He tilts his head a little to the side, not entirely satisfied with your shy little answer.

"Come on. Make me believe it."

"It's a deal," you say with more grit to it, even if you're nearly crying again, this time from relief.

"That's my girl."

Oh fuck…

He knows exactly what strings to pull, the good girl talk being one of the things that instantly makes your legs feel like jelly. 

And why does he always have to use that voice when he calls you a good girl or his girl, that sultry smoke that makes you want to swoon until he catches you and carries you to bed?

The man seems to be a mind reader as well, because he sweeps you off your feet and does exactly that: carries you to your bed which has mainly seen silent tears and painful sleep last months.

"Poor thing doesn't even know how lovely she is."

He sounds amused in the face of your darkness: sees it in full and still doesn't fear at all. He's ready to battle your demons for you, and you feel like shaking: from his touch and that voice, from the stress and loneliness that starts to release as he lays you down on the bed.

He looks so different from the man that has haunted this place for the past months, the complete opposite of the reserved soldier retreating into the shadows.

He moves to kiss you, and it's been – what? Weeks since your last kiss? And even that was only a quick peck, nothing like this… Wet, and desperate; a devouring. It makes you clench around nothingness, and you finally surrender. 

No one can fake such fervor.

You try to accept it: accept the fact that even if you hate yourself, he does not. For some reason, he adores you. His breaths hit your face hot and urgent, and he can't keep his hands to himself anymore. They wander over your waist and hips, they even risk to steal a feel of your breasts, and then he groans in your mouth.

"I've missed you. Fuck, I've missed you..."

You taste notes of burning leaves; tobacco, his only weakness. You fantasize on the thought that you might be another weakness, too.

"Remember when I fucked you in my office?"

"I've missed you too," you utter softly in between the kisses that threaten to turn into a sloppy mess. "So much..."

He smiles at that, and it makes you weak, even when lying down like this.

"Yeah…?"

"You were so loud I had to put a hand over your mouth."

His voice is thick as he laughs a short chuckle. Your inner walls clench again at the sound, you throb among the warm syrup surrounding you.

"Never seen you so wet. Almost dripped all over my gear."

"It's that stupid mask you wear," you hear yourself breathe like you've just been underwater. Feel yourself throb some more, feel a burning sensation in the nether areas from the scorched desert turning wet again. You want him so much that it actually hurts down there.

"Knew you'd like it. That's why I kept it on."

If this man keeps talking, your underwear is going to be utterly ruined. And of course he does; of course he continues to pour more love in your ear.

"Everyone looked at you like you were a queen," he grunts in your ear, sounding almost… pissed.

"Don't be ridiculous," you try to form sensible words. It's only a faint breath, really, but he huffs at your modesty. 

"You don't have eyes in the back of your head, love."

Wow… He is a bit pissed.

Had they checked your ass out when you visited him? 

It was the first and, what you thought, the last time you got to visit him at his workplace… but you never would have guessed the reason for him not asking you to visit again would be jealousy. 

"Don't worry. I put those fuckers in their place after you left." 

Whoa. 

Ok…

First, he had fucked you senseless in his office – a highly inappropriate move for a man in his position – then got jealous because some soldiers had checked you out as you left with his cum practically dripping from your cunt.

You put yourself in his shoes for a moment: he's had to live with thoughts of you running to some other man's arms when he's not home, and then watch you waltz around his workplace after making what was supposed to be the last effort to make him love you… When he has loved and adored you this whole time, has watched the sway of your ass with the rest of those home-deprived, horny soldiers, thinking you had fallen out of love and were on your way to go see some other guy.

Had he invited you there to try and win you back, too? By showing himself to you in all his puffed up, masculine glory? A desperate man in a skull mask, hoping to get love from you…

There's so many misunderstandings; they rip your throat. A sob escapes, and he stops his caress.

"Love… Tell me to stop if you–"

"No. No, I don't want you to stop." 

Your request comes out with such demand that he hesitates only a second or two. Then he moves on top of you and tugs your skirt up. You don't even have time to realize what is happening before he has worked himself out of his pants.

He's hard and heavy between your legs, and your eyes go wide as you realize he's not going to bother to take your briefs off. He just slides a hand under the skirt and draws the fabric aside, and the fat tip of him is pushed in the middle almost clumsily. It's hot, and slips down to your opening with ease.

Oh f–

"Been jerking off to you nearly every night at the base," he says just before he pushes himself in. 

"Uh–...."

Your thighs spread wide as he fills you slowly, inch after inch. The sound that leaves him is starved: a dry, painful sigh. He's been waiting for this for god knows how long, and you're just as hungry to take him in. He seems endless, the way he finally works himself fully inside, spreading you even wider as the thickening base of his cock reaches its end. 

"Thought you were getting railed by someone else while I only get to fuck my hand."

"Oh god…"

There's really nothing else to say as his balls press against you, heavy and taut. He's not going to last long.

"Yeah. Imagine that," he admits, breathless like you. 

You look at him with what must be the most helpless stare of longing in your eyes. Then he moves, and you want to grip him to keep him inside. The first thrusts are divine, they're pure heaven, and your head sinks deep into the pillow as you try to get enough air, try to not scream from pleasure already. Somehow, all you are able to utter is a desperate little whisper.

"Simon–"

His cock is good enough to bring tears to your eyes. You're starving too, you're pulling him in with fierce hunger, and he groans, then nearly falls forward, his weight pressing against you, swallowing you, until you feel like you're an idiot for thinking that you're too big. The thickness of his chest rubs against you as he makes love to you with passion that echoes the first times you did this.

"Just wanna adore you, love." He's panting desperate somewhere above you. A god and a man, both furious and gentle. "I wanna adore you. Just like this."

You answer him with what must be those sounds he told you about, the sounds you make when you want it hard. 

You want him to fuck you, to wreck you after weeks of loneliness and hate. To love you until you break into a million pieces.

"Simon," you whisper. "...Love me."

He halts, huffs in your neck. It's almost a sob. There's so much emotion and desperation in the air that it could be scooped up and sold in the streets.

"Always," he rasps in your ear, then moves to kiss you again. "Always."

The promise echoes around you, it coats your lips as he loves you with all he has. It's been so long, and he feels so good that you nails dig into his shirt, his shoulder, you try to hold onto him even though he's the wave that rocks you.

"You feel that?" He goes deep; he's out of breath and desperate, even more desperate than you. "That's love. You feel it, yeah?"

"Yes," you sob in his shoulder, tears trying to escape your waterline as you're going dumb from the pure sensation, the sensuality of it all. 

"That's it, love. That's a good girl," he turns to your neck and gruffs in your ear as you whimper and moan. "Always such a good girl."

Shit…

"I, I'm gonna…"

Your legs wrap around his middle, your muscles twitch and your hands reach and grab – they claw and yank and tug everything they can: his back, shoulders, shirt, something sturdy to keep you from drowning in a glorious orgasm.

He laughs in your neck and continues to grind you through your climax even when you're shattering, sighing, moaning, writhing under him. He just laughs, the man who never laughs: from witnessing you respond to him calling you a good girl.

Fucking bastard…

Lovable, infuriating bastard who knows you to your core. 

You're an overstimulated heap by the time he comes as well, not long after you, but long enough to make you feel like you're only a tender bunch of nerves. Your legs have fallen to the side, he has open access to take what he needs: you, your love, all of it.

His whole middle goes tense as he cums, he groans and swears somewhere deep into your neck, rolls his hips over and over again like it's a must that his balls press against you with every thrust that shoot his load. 

Then he falls slack, nearly collapses on top of you, reminding you of what it feels like to be small under a giant like him. You're throbbing together, you're full and fulfilled, and he is still lodged deep inside you, panting and broken in a sweat.

"Jesus Christ…" 

He sounds dazed. 

Relieved. 

"Should've done this weeks ago."

You laugh at seeing him so done – a man in love, torn by jealous yearning, finally taking what's his. You stroke his neck, his back – it's so good to have him finally there… So close, with no barriers in between.

"I should've talked to you weeks ago..." 

"Yeah. You should have."

"Are you going to punish me?" You giggle a little – the flirt is light and frees your heart further from its recent jail. He moves to look at you with all the tenderness there is. It's too much... His love is too much. But you won't run from it anymore.

"Nah. Think I'm gonna spoil you some more."

He spoils you right away with a kiss. You surrender to his treatment with happiness: happy tears, even. 

The medicine to your anguish has been the exact opposite to what you had first tried, what you had originally thought. The true remedy for your sickness is mercy. Perhaps some spoiling…

And love.

[sukunasweetheart]

God I’m always the biggest sucker for AUs where Sukuna is Yuji’s older brother and is just smarter and stronger and the reader is Yuji’s lil friend in his friend circle- literally the only one pining for his ripped older brother like 👀👀👀❤️💦💦💦 ‘h-hi’

GAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHSJDNFKSDNKSDNG I LOVE THIS SO MUCH TOOOOOO

theres always something about the older brother of a friend.................................................................................

he will find u so cute and adorable, such a nervous little thing before his eyes,,, sukuna doesnt usually gaf about yuuji's friends and whatnot but you pique his interest....

sorry i got carried away and wrote a whole thing on this oopsies it's very lengthy and wordy...

thinking about the first day you get invited to yuujis house along with megumi and nobara without thinking much of it, only to run into his older brother who turns out to be totally your type

(youre the type of person who develops a crush easily, so much so that no one bats an eye when you tell them that you have a new crush, rip.)

"i thought i told you not to bring your shitty meetings into the house, brat," he tells yuuji coldly, staring down at you and yuuji in the living room.

"awh, shut up! if you can bring your hookups home, i can bring my friends!" sukuna rolls his eyes at him.

"make sure to stay quiet, then. else, i'm kicking all of you out."

all of your friends give side eyes at each other, thinking about what an asshole yuujis older brother is but youre staring at him with puppy eyes, in love at first sight (and he notices it all)

sukuna retreats to his room, and you're already gushing at everyone else about your new crush... all your friends are like 😑

(it's nothing serious at this point, think of it like a fan admiring an idol)

you begin frequenting yuujis house just to get glimpses of him from then on

the four of you are watching a film in the living room, when the snacks run out

you volunteer to grab some more from the kitchen...and there you find sukuna making himself a sandwich...shirtless.

internally screaming, you freeze on the spot for a second before recollecting yourself and focusing on the original objective, to ogle at his bulging muscles- no, that's not it.. to grab more snacks for your friends...

you try to avert your gaze from him as you look for an appropriate bowl to pour the bag of crisps into, but the cupboard! it's too high up!

you try on your tippy toes and manage to touch the bowl, but it's still a struggle...

"you know, you should just ask for help, instead of potentially making more trouble for us."

his body brushes up against you for a second as he grabs the bowl easily. "is this what you want?"

"yes, sorry..." you could erupt into a nosebleed any second now.

"you're welcome."

with a smirk, he walks back into his room with his plateful of sandwiches.

you seemingly float back to the living room with the bowl of snacks in your hands

"i ran into your brother in the kitchen... he was shirtless...." you say with hearts still in your eyes

"what?? and you came back out alive? he hates it when someone comes into the kitchen while hes using it..."

youre giggling and falling into deeper delusions (or is it really?)

one day, you show up at yuujis house bc you and him became partners for a project at uni, but the person who answers the door is not yuuji

"h-hi... is yuuji home?" you ask.

"he's not home right now, sweetie. but you're free to come in if you want."

s-sweetie... you repeat inside your head.

sukuna basically sees your tail wagging behind you. you're so easy, arent you?

you sit on the sofa in the living room, and to your panic, sukuna makes himself comfortable next to you as well, making you tense up

"relax... i won't bite," he tells you with a languid smirk. "or, do you want me to?"

(yes. yes, i want you to.)

the conversation goes back and forth a little bit, and he gets flirtatious but before it escalates, yuuji returns home.

from then on, he gets more and more bold whenever you come over, giving little teasing touches whenever he gets the chance, driving you madd

numbers are exchanged eventually - without your friends knowing.

and then; you receive a text while youre sitting with them one evening, saying "if you're wanting a little more, you can come upstairs to my room."

...you tell your friends youre going to the toilet, and make your way up. giving a soft knock at his door, he opens up and looks down at you with sultry eyes.

(whatever happens in that room? a secret.)

now every time you're over at yuuji's place, sukuna texts you to come pay him a visit. things either end up with you sucking his dick, or just a quickie. (its all very steamy but youre always leave wanting more) ... its so hot to think abt going back to sit with your friends again after he's stuffed you with his load, and pulled your panties back up for you

"you look a bit sweaty, y/n. you okay?"

you tell them it was a tough no. 2 (i mean, what else can you tell them??)

sukuna as well, feels a little... lonely.... whenever you have to make your way back as soon as things are finished

during one afternoon, he overhears you guys talking about your newly found crush-- an older senior upperclassman from uni (getou suguru)

"did you guys see the way he smiled at me? he's so dreamy..."

"do you ever get tired of changing love interests?"

and this upset sukuna more than he expected.

he demands you come up soon after, and intense sex ensues, where he's rougher than usual, possessiveness showing

at one point during it, he asks why you're looking at other men, when you have him... and you tearfully tell him its because you want more than just this, you want to go on dates and be asked out like other girls...

"you could've just asked me. you thought i wouldn't commit?"

sure, you started out as a fun little toy for him, but now he's well aware there's something more going on here...

things get softer and youre left heaving, arms wrapped around sukuna as he looms over your body

"we took too long... they're gonna find out," you tell him.

"let them. why do we need to be a secret, anyway?"

"we don't? i thought that's what you wanted."

"what? when did i-"

(yuuji opens the door)

oh. my. god.

panic and screaming occurs, and the door is slammed shut, leaving you awfully embarrassed, and sukuna just sighing and putting a shirt back on.

"c'mon, sweetheart. we have some explaining to do."

theres a lot of chaos, yuujis face is STILL red and nobara + megumi are horrified, but all ends well bc at least now, you can date sukuna openly, and have your first relationship in peace.

[maxillness]

Tell Me Your Sounds || Ferrari!KR7 x Reserve driver!Reader

Warnings: 18+, blowjob, sub!kimi, (slight) yearning, biting,

Wordcount: 1.1k

Might do a part 2, dunno

Kimi never spoke, and when he did, it was short answer, and she hated it

She wanted to have an ongoing conversation with the man, but he kept his answers short, almost like he didn’t want to speak to her

All his silent conversation got her to thinking “Do you think he’s silent in bed too?” She asked, Sebastian almost choking on his water

He looked with a confused expression at her “First of all, it would be interesting to know, but I don’t want to know. Second of all, why are you thinking about that?”

“How the fuck did that make sense what you just said?” It was now her to be confused “And… I can’t sleep at night, so I think, and sometimes it’s weird stuff” She shrugged

“You might as well just find out” He said, taking another sip of his water “I’m joking” He said, seeing her thinking face

“I know, wasn’t even thinking about it” She said, obviously lying

“If you say so”

She definitely needed to find out. One way or another

Over the next few weeks, so tried getting closer to him, tried getting to know him better

She was the one who started texting him first, until he was the one to strike conversation

He was way more wordy over text then when you spoke to him face to face

As they grew closer, her thoughts got dirtier. She could be doing anything, and she would imagine what he would sound like

Her fingers moving inside her, coming around them to the thought of his sounds

It was the race week, and she was talking with Sebastian before FP1

“You’ve gotten your answer yet?” He asked, a cheeky smile on his lips

“No” She sighed “Ask me again on Sunday” She answered, matching his smile

“You’re something of your own” He chuckled, walking away from her again

They had been talking to each other as much as they could when he wasn’t in the car, every now and then placing innocent touches on him

Qualifying rolled around, and both the drivers god an okay end. Both finishing in Q3

“Good job, man” She said, fist bumping Sebastian as he walked into the garage

“Oh, sorry, rakkaus” Kimi had accidentally bumped into her, but in all honesty, she just wanted his touch, no matter how he did it

“It’s quite alright” She smiled, turning around to face him “You did good by the way” She loved the way his eyes lit up and a slight blush crept up on his cheeks at the praise

“Thank you” His words almost got stuck in his throat as he looked down into the floor

She felt a kind of confident boost she never had experienced before, encouraging to take the shot of hearing his sounds

She took a step closer to him, and just below a whisper she said “If you ever wanna celebrate, you know where to find me”

She didn’t let him react before she walked away to talk to some of the machines and engineers

She expected him to react, but not the way he did

He had grabbed her wrist, pulling her roughly away from her conversation without as much of an apology

“Kimi-“ She didn’t get to finish her sentence before she was shoved up against the closed door of his drivers room

His lips was on hers immediately, holding a hand behind her head to not hurt her

“Kimi…” She shoved softly on his chest, pushing him away from her

“What? You said if I wanted to celebrate-“ “I know” She panted slightly looking up into her lust blown eyes

“I was just startled, that’s all” She took her hands back to his face, smashing their lips back together in a wet and sloppy kiss

His suit was already hanging on his hips, so it was easy for her to slip her hands down his torso and under his fireproofs, feeling his skin on her fingertips

They parted their lips so she could pull off his fire profs, throwing it carelessly on the floor before attaching her lips above his collarbone

He let out a whimper as she sucked softly on the skin, creating a purple bruise

She pushed on his abdomen, guiding him towards the small couch in the room. She pushed him down once the back of his legs hit it

She got on her knees in front of him, hands tapping his hips, making him buck them up so she could pull the suit down

As the suit was discarded on the floor as well, her hands went to the waist band of his boxers, pulling them down as well

He whimpered at the way her lustful eyes looked up at him. She kissed his inner thigh, forcing him to spread his legs

She scooted forwards, lips still kissing his skin. She bit softly down, pulling a whimper from him

“Please” His hands grabbed the edge of the couch beside his legs

She pulled away from his thigh. Her hands went to his hips, holding them there as her tongue drew over the tip of his cock, drawing out a high-pitched moan from him

He sounded so much prettier than she had imagined. His head threw back as his eyes closed shut as her tongue began to swirl around him

His moans were loud, not giving a shit if anyone could hear him, which they probably could

His whole body shook at her tongue drew over his slit, his moan shuttered, knuckles turning white

He bucked his hips up, wanting her to swallow him

She swirled her tongue around him twice before swallowing him whole. She gagged slightly as he hit the back of her throat

“Mm… Feels so good” She moaned as she started bobbing her head up and down his shaft, spit starting to pool in the corner of her mouth

“Fuck, just like that” The sounds that came out of him was almost embarrassing if he wasn’t fucked out

Her nails dug into the pale skin of his hips as she sped up, her tongue dragging on the sensetive skin of his vain

“Fuck- please- yes… Fuck, so close” His cock started twitching inside her mouth, leaking pre cum on to her tongue

She hummed at the taste of the salty taste, sending vibrations into his cock, sending him over the edge, shooting his cum down here throat with her name rolling off his tongue

She popped off of him, swallowing his load, feeing the sticky substance go down her throat

She stood up, knees hurting and wobbly. She leaned down to kiss him between his knitted eyebrows

“You sound so fucking pretty” She softly placed a kiss on his jaw “You should really talk some more”

“Just for you. Only you’ll hear me” He panted, coming down from his orgasm, his hands caressing the sides of her body

[therealslimshakespeare]

idk why but the concept idea of John Brady having a massively stupid crush on one of Ida Brady’s subordinates/girls is hilarious to me

like he’s out here fighting for his life bc his sister is terrifying enough and he’s trying to be all casual “don’t be suspicious, don’t be suspicious” as he’s attempting to be subtle about said crush 😂

Pray for this poor boy, he’s going through it. Don’t mistake him, he was always a rule abiding and rank observing fella, but he’s a man and he’s not blind and some of these girls make him feel like up is down and down is up and he could keep that all shoved away far easier back before he was sharing bunks with them!!! It was easier back when they were beat up -god forgive him- and he could tend to them with soup and needles and not have to fend off flirts and soft eyes. He’s quite glad his sister is alive and well but fuck -did she have to be so near him all the time?? Bucky is sympathetic, he’s out here trying to help his adopted baby bro have some breathing room but the shadow of Ida is long. And Maureen Kendeigh is bored.

Spring, 1944

here, have a blurb 🤭

Candy -as in Kendeigh?

“Candy?” he repeated her nickname.

“Yes, a play on Kendeigh.” Maureen confirmed, patiently waiting for a semblance of understanding to appear behind Captain Brady’s eyes.

“So not like -Candy.”

Maureen held her breath and counted three Mississippi’s before replying in a strained voice, “Only as in Kendeigh sounding like Candy.”

“So it’s got nothin’ to do with Candy.” he asked once more, seemingly in dire need of confirmation one last time.

“Kendeigh.” Maureen enunciated, she’d had about enough and if she didn’t owe him her life she’d be up and off this front step and doing something productive like picking at the wooden walls of their shack or making a mud pie.

“Kendeigh,” he repeated, “nothin’ to with, with-��

“With what?” she dared him, fully intending to actually punch him if he used the wordy Candy once more in that bewildered way.

“-I dunno…pop sickles?”

“Pop sickles?” She repeated loudly, utterly lost, “What the -no! John Egan just played off my name- Kendeigh/Candy! For God’s sake, Johnny, you can’t be this dull you’re a pilot.”

“Ok, ok, sorry.” he had a defensive hunch to his shoulders, “Egan just always sorta…Kendeigh/Candy, ok, ok, got it.”

Maureen stared out ahead at the piddling occupation of the winter camp as an awful thought began to form. “He always what, Captain?” she snapped and the rush of blood to the young man’s cheeks confirmed her track of questioning. “What did John Egan always say about me and popsicles?”

John Brady knew her well enough, knew she knew him well enough, he knew his own face well enough to know his chances of fibbing were zero. He had the gentlemanliness to meet her eyes before reciting with a pained precision that crumpled his whole face, “That you could…eat…them…whole.” he closed his eyes as if in pain before explaining with devastating honesty: “-So, we all thought…Candy.”

Maureen’s mouth folded into a thin line and she knew well enough to divert her piercing glare at the combine right past John Brady’s shoulder and not at the poor defenseless messenger himself.

“I show that sunnuvabitch a party trick once…!” Maureen seethed, “You know I used that talent to help Hambone siphon the gas for you in Idaho, right?”

“You siphoned it for me?” Johnny’s eyes grew wide in touched comprehension of a long expired favor.

Maureen was too preoccupied with rage to appreciate his gratitude. Popsicles. Swallow them whole -Oh!- how she wished that dart had taken Bucky’s eye out. Oh!-how she was going to do more than punch John Egan.

“Sorry, sorry Maureen.” Johnny muttered again, almost more to himself than asking for her absolution as the minutes ticked by and she kept fuming beside him on the step.

Until Maureen could think of a way to make Egan suffer, she could find ways to amuse herself. Camp was boring after all, and it wasn’t every day one got John Brady verbally against the ropes. She smoothed her face a little and turned to him almost pleasantly, not enough to spook, just enough to send a small blanching look of dread across his face.

“What?” he asked after the suspense got to him.

“Oh nothin’.” Maureen smiled, shrugging her shoulders and drawing lines in the dust with the toe of her boot. “Just wondering is all.”

“What?” he demanded more forcefully. “What’s that face for?”

“Just wondering. Wondering what’s your stake in it all -whether I can with a popsicle or not? What’s it to you, John Brady?”

He held her gaze for a disbelieving moment before letting out a little winded scoff, eyes rolling, shaking his head, utterly and merrily defeated. “Nothin’ -nothing at all, I’m just a nosy bastard.”

“Ah, well, that solves that.” She pointed out, taking pains to bump his shoulder companionably with her own, and got the gesture returned so heartily she was almost knocked off the steps if he hadn’t been quick to grab her. “It’s always the quiet ones.” She mused with a cruel glint in her eyes as she surveyed him, secure once again.

“Don’t make me shove you off again.” He warned, and she didn’t doubt he’d do it.

Oddly some part of her wanted him to. Instead she made peace by reaching over and taking his pipe from his mouth and puffing on it herself. He’d grown too used to this to waste breath balking about ladies and pipes and personal property. “So are you going to help me make him pay or are you really that much of a bastard?”

“The Brit’s in B Block call you Nike.” he informed her conversationally, seeming to think a little sermon on vengeance and its merits was opportune when trapped in a dog pen with one’s fellows.

Armed with recent awareness that John Brady had been intrigued by her popsicle throating capabilities, Maureen was having none of it. “Yes and they call you ‘Cunty,’ sweet John.” she informed him levelly before delivering her punchline, “And not a single American defended you.”

Brady processed this with an amiable mouth shrug of admittance before sighing deeply. “So what do you want this cunt to do for you?” He inquired, resigned even before Maureen’s smirk grew in triumph.

“Hmm, it’ll come to us.” she hedged, “For now let’s enjoy the sunset.” and with that they continued sat side by side, staring down the rows of shacks and their muddy lanes and the dismal forest beyond and the slate gray sky overhead and the whole damn place without a touch of color except for the pink in his cheeks.

[thatdeadaquarius]

About language brainrot. Imagine writer creator reader who finally learns how to write in Teyvat's weird symbols and they want to publish their book. They decided to do it anonymously to avoid the "aaaaaah our creator wrote the holy scripture" sort of situation. Except it didn't work. The reader's style is too different from the rest of the world, so even if they tried to simulate the flowery speech it wasn't effective.

Another thing. Reader who decided to read some local books to practice their reading. They asked for something simple and similar to their speech. But the only books merely similar to it are 2000 and more years old. It's funny how the older text is the more you can understand it. On this note. If reader write something i feel like it would be hard to understand for Teyvat's people.

Imagine a reader who is autistic or has any other NDs imparing their communication skills. They practically trained themselves to say sertain phrases in sertain situation. But it doesn't work in Teyvat. And everything just stacks at each other. Difference in speech, being a God (so people react weirdly to you), bad communication skills, not understanding nonverbal cues and so on. There's gonna be a lot of misunderstanding. I imagine how followers would walk on the eggshells not to upset and angry their God and reader who does the same not to say something people will get wrong. Again.

Reader who regained all their memories of creating Teyvat, they're super powerful and stuff. But they still struggle with the modern language. Because all the memories are like millions years old.

✨️NEXYLAZA UR SO FUCKING SMART AND CREATIVE✨️ UR BRAIN>>>>>> EVERYTHING

GIF Akashi (black hair) is all the people who read the Sagau/Isekai Genshin tag and Bokuto (silver) is STILL ME RANTING ABOUT LANGUAGE IN TEYVAT LMAO

They cant escape me, sorry people who just wanted to read SAGAU normal things, im filling up the tag💀

I HAD OTHER ASKS BEFORE THIS ONE AND AS I GOT THRU EM I WAS "OMMGGGG WE'RE GETTIN CLOSER TO NEXY'SSSS ASSSKKKK EEEEEEE"

YOU ARE A GODDAMN GENIUS

DHALALWKDHDHS

ME ABOUT THIS ASK:

(^ lol biblically accurate deadaquarius)

I DONT EVEN KNOW WHERE TO BEGINNNN

BRAINROTTING OVER UR ENTIRE ASK!!

♡

Also, its getting kinda old now, so here is the blunt language v. Teyvat's flowery language post for reference! :)

Hhhhhhhhhhh

IF U WRITE STUFF

AND UR IN WORDY TEYVAT LAND

AINT NO WAY,👏

U COULD EVEN, 👏👏

GET CLOSE👏👏👏

TO THESE BITCHES SPEECH👏👏👏👏

◇

Like,, imagine right now if i told you to write me 4 pages of an essay in entirely early 18th century vernacular.

(For reference: when the story Pride & Prejudice takes place)

... like??

Bitch aint no way u can do that and actually show that to a historian or an actual living person from that time period

and them actually say "wow! An excellently worded 18th century essay!"

💀.

◇

So tying into that whole, "the only simple texts are like literal cunnieform clay tablets or sm shit"

Your writing to them just sounds like if a scribe just copied off what one of those tablets said just onto paper HAHA

And like, if u try and dress it up, it just ends up sounding like its from a slightly later time period

Like if ur casual writing sounds like 1 million years ago, u being flowery sounds like 8-7 thousand years ago u cant win LMAO

◇

Omg ur trying to go to that-

wait whats it called,,fuck i dont know Sumeru good enough yet

The.. HOUSE OF DAENA GOT IT

Yeah so ur thinking "Oh what better way to learn a dialect?/vernacular than reading books by them!"

And u basically snatch Alhaitham at the soonest possible chance to take you there

(Bc when i went in, it was just random lore books everywhere so)

Needless to say you have no clue how this place is organized, so u convince him to direct you to books u can easily read first

Like as close to your speech as possible!! U tell him :)

.

..

...lol

It literally takes like 3 hours to get something readable LMAO

Bc when the poor feeble scribe initially brought you smth he thought was pretty old and close to ur speech, like just first thought,

... It sounded like it was from the middle of the 18th century to you lol

So, with a "hmm" and a squint at the dusty book you'd already given up on

Alhaitham slowly went around the library making a stack of books, dropped them off in front of you... not a single sentence.

...then he made a stack of scrolls...

..nope..

...a stack of stone tablets...

.....getting closer?? it was really weird seeing Shakespearean language carved into stone....

...and then, with a conversation to a second library secretary deeper in the library, past a caged area of shelves to protect them...

...he escorts you behind the restricted section towards the back filled with glass display cases.

(Several of which contain the most ancient looking sets of artifacts you've ever seen)

...Finally, u arrive at a long glass case of several clay tablets.

Half of which sound like they're from the 1910s-20s, and the other, even older half, sounding straight out of the 2000s..

..

....

......

...Good god.

(Good..you??)

These crazy speaking bastard-previously-video-game-characters were right.

...

You are suddenly, viscerally hit with the image of Zhongli's idle, "Osmanthus wine tastes the same as I remember, but where are those who share the memory?" 💀

◇

Alhaitham side eyes you,, (he looks,, very interested, yet also kinda concerned??? HIM, CONCERNED????!!!)

"Ahem, the texts before thy Greatest Lord art the eldest- well, perhaps, more appropriately, the eldest and most intact, pieces of written language known to our humankind."

...

....aYOO MAN 😭😭

...Ur just staring at these half cracked, baked clay tablet thingys, full of slang from like 2003-

Alhaitham coughs.

"Uh, thanks. ...Sorry about all the.. trouble with this..."

BRO HOW OLD DOES HE THINK U ARE NOW-

"This task assigned to mine own person was of no trouble to my mind or spirit, Greatest Lord, fret not about it any longer."

And with a sort of shell-shocked atmosphere surrounding both of you, Alhaitham walks off to check out some other restricted books, hovering nearby yet also trying to give u space LOL

Top 10 cursed images: Seeing "Chillax, bro, dude, and weeb" carved into ancient clay tablets that look like they would be part of the Egyptian exhibit back in ur world 💀

◇

You eventually just kind of end up writing a couple pages after studying the writings, going younger and younger (nothing has ever made u feel more powerful...yet also more old..)

You stretch, just as Alhaitham finally has made his own little stack of creaky old books

He seems very curious to read what u wrote, peaking a glance over the top of his book every so often (lol nerd, cute nerd... but NERDDD)

You just offer the academic lunatic what he wants 🙄

"Haha, wanna take a look? Some drafts are... closer than others..."

The scribe immediately puts his book down, not even saving his page,

"I would be honored, Greatest Lord."

Is he excited?? 💀 omfg

U very slowly hand ur most recent practice pages over, he curls his hand under his chin "hmm" ing

...Alhaitham shakes his head

"My..deepest apologizes My Creator, but this still seems, at the earliest, from when papyrus was invented, and not yet even into scrolls..."

OK BUT ALHAITHAM WOULD GENUINELY GIVE NO FUCKS ABT CRITIQING YOU, HE MAY BE MORE POLITE ABT IT BUT EVEN IF U DID MAKE THE WORLD HES GOING FOR IT

KAVEH HAS A HEART ATTACK BC HIS ROOMMATE GOT ONTO GOD LMAO

U let ur head plop on ur pile of papers, srry babe youll never be as fancy as Mr. Darcy 😕

And as ur resting there, contemplating just walking out and finding smth to eat instead- same

Alhaitham picks up another draft.

Except it's your first attempt.

As in, you didn't even try, first attempt.

You just made some bullet point notes or some Bs, in ur regular. modern. language.

Alhaitham knocks his chair over standing up so fast-

(HE GETS SHUSHED BY THE RESTRICTED LIBRARIAN LOL, also another person unafraid to scold God lol)

...he says its a perfect example of the oldest records they've found of writing on the continent, most of which they haven't even translated yet

He asks u to teach him how to read this/speak like this lol

♧

(^^^not my best work but hope yall got smth outta it💀)

I WAS LITERALLY GONNA MAKE A WHOLE POST ON THE NEURODIVERGENT EXPERIENCE OF BEING A GOD IN TEYVAT

ESPECIALLY OF THE LANGUAGE BARRIER VARIETY!!!

THERES JUST

ACK

aCK HDHAKD

SO MUCH

TO SAY

!!!

AHHHHH

OK BUT LIKE

IF WE ACTUALLY TOOK THIS TO THE EXTREME IM IMPLYING IT WOULD BE

LIKE TEYVAT SPEAKS SEVERAL DECADES BEHIND U- MAYBE EVEN ACTUALLY

CLOSE TO PRIDE AND PREJUDICE TIMES SPEECH

THEY WOULD LITERALLY BARELY COMPHREHEND YOU

IMAGINE TRYING TO TALK TO MR. DARCY 😭

THATS LITERALLY ALL OF TEYVAT

JUST

???¿¿?????!!! <- THEM ALL THE TIME

ESP IF UR NEURODIVERGENT

I THINK IT WOULD BE EVEN MORE PROOF FOR THEM TO THINK UR GOD

BC UR BEHAVIOR WOULD BE "OFF" TO THEIR NEUROTYPICAL ASSES,

YOUR FACIAL EXPRESSIONS,

LIKE UR MASKING MAYBE BUT

U CANT KEEP THAT SHIT UP ALL THE TIME-

ESP IN CRAZY ISEKAI CIRCUMSTANCES

AND LIKE-

(ok ill tone it down before i also get shushed)

U used to be a player!!

Which would maybe mean u got rlly comfy playing Genshin all the time!

...like i know im kinda stimming when im gaming (and my natural stim is rocking so yeah no way they wouldnt notice that 💀)

So, since u may be still yknow unconsciously wanting to be comfy (esp around ur mains/team/favs)

U probably have stimmed a little around them, which, not that neurotypicals dont stim, but like

They would notice after awhile

And esp people like Alhaitham, Zhongli, Ningguang, Xiao, Ei, Aether/Lumine, Kaeya, Diluc, Kazuha, Heizou, Shenhe, Kokomi, Sara, Albedo, Dainsleif- !! GASP- !! <- my bbygirl omg i forgot abt u before now im so sorry </3

(once again i have not checked a character list, forgive my sins my readers)

^^^ Are like pretty focused on you/observant, so they'd eventually pick up on it first probably

..

...

....which allsssooo means they're like, collecting all ur neurodivergent thingys lol to compile as EVIDENCE AGAINST YOU AS TO WHY THEY KNOW UR THE CREATOR LMAO

◇

Honestly the biggest factor against u is definitely social interaction,, srry love :/

(if it helps, its bc i know itd be my downfall too thats why thats there ^ 😔)

Mostly bc i have this idea/theory? obervation? that when I especially met Adepti for the first time

Esp ones that werent as close to human society for as long as some others (like think Xiao vs. Ganyu)

And for literally every other non-human people we've met so far in Genshin-

They kinda- they kinda, radiate neurodivergent energy??

Like, they're not adherring to social norms, and not in like a bad way,

But its still rlly obvious (i mean also its probably exaggerated for us as an audience) that theyre not human pretty quickly

coughzhonglicough

COUGHVENTICOUGH-

oh geez wow excuse me, cold weather must be gettin to me- ahem hem-

Anyway, like what Nexy said in the ask,

...

...Yall are all just tiptoing around each other 😭😭

Bc these ppl arent from Earth countries,

All their behavior is weird to you 😭

U dont know how to mask with them yet 😭😭

THE UNBELIEVABLE AMOUNT OF MISCOMMUNICATION THAT HAPPENS ALREADY WHEN UR NEUROSPICY VS. NEUROBLAND PPL

IS LIKE, ALMOST WORSE??

Bc they cant even understand ur phrasing bc its so simple 😭😭😭

◇

Tldr: "Being Neurodivergent means ur a god, confirmed." - says all of Teyvat's denizens

◇

NEXYLAZA.

MY BELOVED.

I AM IN LOVE WITH UR BRAIN.

IF I COULD GIVE IT A HUG I WOULD🫂✨️👏👏👏👏

BC I WAS ALREADY LIKE IN THE BACK OF MY MIND LIKE-

*rubs my little rat gremlin hands together*

"hmHmHMMMM BuT wHaT iF mAYbE yOU reMeMbeREd cReATinG TeyVAT, hmHMHMMMMM"

AND FOR VERBALIZING IT WITHIN BLUNT LANGUAGE AU- !!!!!!!

(one of my favs, if u cant tell)

I would (platonically) kiss you right now dude.

Instead I give this:

♡ ily

And also, I AM GOING TO MAKE A WHOLE POST ABOUT THIS-

MAYBE EVEN A FANFIC, OR ONE SHOT AHDHAKFHSKLAAL-

UNTIL NEXT TIME MY BELOVED PARTNER IN CRIME <333

PSPSPSPSsppspspspssss Last Time! CLOSES TOMORROW @1pm CST: VOTE on my 100+ followers celebration POLL :)

Tell me what u wanna see me write about! PSPSPSPSpspspspssss

(U can vote even if ur new! :] )

THANK YOU FOR SUBMITTING THIS ASK

THIS IS A TREASURE OF MINE NOW

GONNA HIDE IT IN MY LITTLE CAVE OF SCREENSHOTTED SAGAU POSTS <333 hehehehehehehehehehe

THIS IS LIKE PT2 TO MY ORIGINAL LANGUAGE POST AHHHHH

NEXY BIG BRAIN ILYSM <3

Cheers,

🌒🌧🌊Aquarius♒️🌌🌘

♡the beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza lol ur own ask im a menace sorry

[loverboy-havocboy]

Hello beloved! Could I please ask about:

exit wounds (during skye) - aliit au (*grabby hands for the pain??*🫣)

and/or if that's already been asked... I'm intrigued to know more about "one more push" 👀👀 ??? PWEaSE 🥹 tysm.

aaahh two!! tysm my dear 🥺💖 i think i'll do exit wounds here then reblog with the second since i tend to get wordy

exit wounds

this is the doc for expanding on comet's time with skye - specifically how it started and how his absence impacted boost and sinker. the title is a placebo song that's very comet/sinker when comet leaves them for skye. it's been really difficult to work on because i never want bad things to happen to them 🥺

what's in out of the ashes is very brief and i've also changed my mind about a key part - boost and sinker distrust skye from the very first day they meet him, which i no longer think serves the story. he's not some simple asshole, he's a master manipulator, and many abusers know how to charm not only their victims but also the people who would protect them - at least until they've got their claws into their victim.

i'm also changing the "reward" skye is holding over comet's head to get him to obey. currently it's the promise of being his collared sub, but it's going to be the promise of marriage and children - the things comet wanted with wooley, things that have always been incredibly important to him.

both of these things in the original diminish the relationship comet has with boost and sinker. they make it mean so much less than it does. he would never leave them to get a dom and if they said they didn't trust someone he would trust them.

comet/skye snippet:

“No, I'd love to move in with you!” Comet assures him quickly. “It’s just.. moving away from Boost and Sink - I don't know.”

“Well you didn't think you'd live with them forever,” Skye laughs - and he does it so easily, like it was so obvious they'd split up eventually, that Comet is suddenly too embarrassed to admit otherwise.

But, yeah.. he kind of did.

His embarrassment must show on his face, though, because Skye is still laughing. “Oh my god, you actually did, didn't you?”

Comet can feel his skin burning from the tips of his ears down to his neck. His defense comes weakly. “Yeah, a little, I guess. Please don't laugh at me, Skye.. They're my best friends. I just - I never really thought about it.”

boost/sinker snippet:

[context: i think sinker coped with losing comet by drinking heavily and he and boost fought about comet a lot - what they did, what they should've done, if they could've changed it. they've just had some such fight, but i haven't written that. also. boost's parents died in a car accident about 10 years ago with him in the car which is how he got his scars]

“I'm not talking about this with you,” Sinker slurs. He turns away, deciding to take a different way home. Let Boost stew in his shit mood on his own, he thinks.

What happens next happens so fast that Sinker can't really make sense of it.

There are several noises - the blaring of a horn, the squealing of tires, voices yelling - two of them - all of them too loud. Then the blinding lights and the hands yanking him backward so suddenly his vision spins.

“Sink- Sinker, I can't lose you, too!” Boost is shouting at him, grabbing him by the shoulders and shaking him hard. All he can do is freeze, eyes wide. “For fuck’s sake, I can't lose my whole fucking family! What is wrong with you?”

The anguish in Boost's voice, the fear in his eyes, it chills Sinker to the bone. Boost is.. Boost is angry with him. Really, really angry.

Both of them just stare at each other for a long moment before Boost’s gaze drops to his hands where they still grip Sinker hard enough to bruise. His eyes widen and he lets go like he's been burned.

“Sink..” he whispers, shaking his head subtly in disbelief. He swallows hard, looks down at his hands, then back up to Sinker's face with tears in his eyes. “I didn't- I'm so sorry. Did I-”

“I th- I think..” Sinker blinks a few times. “I think I need to throw up.”

“Yeah,” Boost agrees quietly, wiping his eyes on the back of his hand. “Yeah, I think you do.”

well 🥺👉👈 you wanted the pain 🥺 now take this. to feel better 🫂☕

[whumping-valentine]

🦌 Fawn and Hunter - Part 12 🦌

"Anaira and Ethel"

Content: Vampire whumpee, werewolf whumper, kidnapping, restraints, threats, supernatural shit, lady whump (even though I actually hate that term but whatever. Why are women a separate category??? Fuck you)

2400 words

Hey hey, sorry about that cliffhanger last chapter, but cliffhangers and plot twists are my specialty! It's simply not my writing without long, wordy dramatics and throwing you for a loop. Also, apologies for taking so long. I think I'm overcoming my writer's block now so hopefully it won't happen again.

This is a direct continuation of the last part, so if you need to look back and read the ending it's here!

Hope you enjoy! 🐺🦇

     Anaira didn't respond to her, simply squeezing her eyes shut as she tensed. Shit.

     “What do you think you’re doing here, huh? Feelin’ suicidal, are you?” Ethel said, nudging for an answer.

      “I’ll have you know I was trying to leave. You're the one making trouble where there's no need.” Anaira turned to her; Ethel's face was covered with her skull mask as always. She realized she was no longer wearing her own.

      “Mmhm. And what were you doing here in the first place if not causing trouble?” Ethel folded her arms, “Any other fang-toothed, sunburnt heathens out where they shouldn’t be?”

      “How am I supposed to know?”

     “They're your colony. Sounds like bad leadership to me. I know where every member of my pack is at all times.”

     “That sounds like a real cult to me. I’m trying to protect my own. You just want control.”

     “Trying to talk back to me on my own grounds, are you? Sorry, but that’s not gonna fly.” She yelled out, “Anthony! Agnes! Over here, NOW!”

     Anaira took off immediately without a second thought, leaving Fawn and Hunter behind. Ethel ran after her, while Fawn and Hunter were roughly tackled to the ground.

     “Ow, fuck!” Fawn exclaimed as they were jumped. One of them— impossible to tell who— sat on top of them. Their knees jabbed into their sides, and fingers tore into their shoulders as they were held down. “What the fuck!”

     “Sorry.” A feminine voice said, “Leader’s orders.” She looked to the other, “Ant, get the gun off them.”

     “Can’t you see I’m struggling here?!” He said, Hunter effectively fighting back against him, trying to push him off.

     “Anthony, it’s a human.”

     “A strong human! You got the weak one!”

     “Hey!” Fawn exclaimed at the insult, while Hunter chuckled. They managed to kick Anthony off of them, but before they could run, Agnes pounced them down face first into the snow, and quickly tossed their gun out of their reach. Before Hunter could even process what was happening, she slipped a pair of handcuffs around their wrists behind their back.

     Fawn tried to make a run for it, but Anthony pushed them down again. His hands firmly held down their upper back before he grabbed their wrists and wrangled them to their feet. Agnes was standing with her foot on Hunter’s back, holding a second pair of handcuffs waiting to be put on Fawn.

     Fawn struggled while Anthony held their wrists tightly behind their back, walking them over to Agnes, “H-hey! Look, we’ve- we seem to have been caught up in some wrong stuff here, we’re innocent and- we don't want any trouble! I’M innocent, actually! Take them, and not me! I didn't do anything! I swear!”

     The two ignored them, Agnes taking them off of Anthony as she cuffed them, “Oh, come on, please, I don’t wanna be double kidnapped, this isn’t fair! This is— mmhph!” They mumbled as cloth was shoved into their mouth, followed by duct tape, then a bag over their head. The same was done to Hunter, and the two were walked off to God knows where.

     Their captors' hands held tightly onto their upper arms, painfully digging their fingers into them, forcing them forward. It was hard for either of them to feel worried when the only thing they could think about were the sore pains. Their arms felt like they were actively in the process of bruising. Like their muscles were being ripped into.

     It wasn't too long before they felt themselves enter a building, the snow turning to concrete while their surroundings warmed. When they heard the doors shut behind them the harsh howling winds were replaced with pure silence. Their footsteps echoed off the seemingly large walls as they were led down a set of stairs. A metal door could be heard opening before both of them were shoved inside. The metal doors closed and the pair could be heard walking away, their footsteps fading back up the stairs until it was silent.

     Fawn struggled up onto their knees and vigorously shook their head until the bag flew off. They threw their head back to push their glasses back on their face and looked around. Hunter was sitting, and clearly angry by the situation (yeah who’s fault is that?).

     Fawn carefully stood to their feet and walked over to them, turning around to grab the bag off their head. They then walked in front of them and made a grabbing motion with their hands. Hunter leaned into them and Fawn pulled the tape from their mouth. They then walked behind them, got on the ground, and put their mouth to their hands, and Hunter did the same to them. They both spit the cloth out of their mouths and took a moment to collect themselves, sitting in silence.

     “Great going, Hunter.” Fawn said bitterly, “You just HAD to go looking for trouble, didn’t you?”

     “How the fuck was I supposed to know they were supernatural?!” 

     “Supernatural or not, you still went looking for a fucking cult. Honestly, I’m fucking embarrassed that out of everyone who could’ve kidnapped me, it was you. What the hell does that say about me? You’re fucking stupid!”

     “No, you see, my mistake was not killing you on the spot.”

     “Oh really? That was your mistake?”

     “Yeah, it was.”

     “Well MY mistake was apparently thinking going for a walk was a good idea! God, I just wanted to take a fucking nature walk! That’s all I wanted! God DAMNIT!”

     “Yeah, maybe don’t wander off the trail.”

     Fawn glared at them, “I will fucking strangle you!”

     “Good luck with that.”

     “I should’ve let you stay gagged. I didn’t have to help you, you know?”

     “Yeah and I didn’t have to help you, either.” Hunter said, “Yet we both still did.”

------

     Anaira was running as fast as her legs could carry her, fueled on pure adrenaline. She knew Ethel was faster and stronger than her. This was a hopeless chase. Though still, she persisted. If she could catch up with her colony back on the other side of the forest, they could all gang up on her. She just had to last a little while longer.

     She cursed herself in her head while she ran. It was such a risky thing to go out into Ethel’s part of the woods, and she knew that, of course she did. It just wasn’t fair what they took from them. It was originally theirs, but Ethel didn’t want them to have it. The blood rivers that ran through it were too good for them. Anaira’s colony was just so thirsty, so she risked it all. She would do anything for them. It’s not like any of them asked for this life…

     So then why was she leading danger to them?

     Anaira slowed to a jog, then a walk, then she stood, and collapsed to her knees in the snow. She hung her head low and closed her eyes.

     “Oh, so first you run away like a coward, and then you just give up?” Ethel said, “You’re such a pathetic fucking creature. Get up.” Anaira obeyed and stood to her feet.

     Ethel smirked under her mask, “Oh, what a day this is! This feels good. That’s right, get over here, you leech.” She grabbed the defeated vampire by her shoulders and roughly dragged her back to base.

     When they entered inside the building, all the other identically dressed pack members looked at Anaira, and whispers filled the quiet air. Some confused, others nervous, most excited. Anaira kept her head down in shame, while Ethel walked with hers held high in pride.

     She was led down a set of stairs into Ethel's quarters, where she was thrown onto a chair and tightly tied. Neither said a single word until Ethel tied the last knot and stepped back behind her.

     She chuckled darkly, “ So, Anaira. How's it feel?” She taunted, “To finally be caught? Oh, I always wondered how long it would take you to finally give up!” She put her hands on her shoulders, “I'm so glad today was that day.”

     Anaira took a breath and sighed to calm herself. She tried to shrug her off her shoulders, but Ethel just dug her fingers into them.

     “How do you think your colony is going to survive the apocalypse without you?”

     “There is no apocalypse.” She mumbled.

     “Do you think all of this end-of-the-word talk is nonsense?” Ethel said, “For once the conspiracy idiots are actually right. The gods are upset and it's time everyone pay.”

     “Can’t imagine why they'd be upset when some of us are raging beasts.”

     “Oh, so the bloodsucker is the one trying to take the moral high ground? If one of us is an unholy spawn against the gods, it's going to be the one who should be dead.” Ethel let go of her shoulders and walked in front of her, “We're obviously more connected to the gods than you are if we can feel it coming.”

     “I think you're crazy is what I think. There are no gods.”

    “And you wonder why they're upset.” Ethel stood with her hands folded behind her back, “How do you think it’s going to look when your colony finds out I captured their leader? Not good, is it?”

     “You don’t scare me. You think you scare me?”

     “I’m not trying to scare you. I asked you a question about your colony, I didn’t ask if you were scared.” her voice was calm and methodical, “You bats like to claim we’re nothing more than raging beasts. Which one of us seems to have better control of our emotions right now?” While her face wasn’t visible, a smirk could be heard in her tone.

     “I’d like to see you be all calm and collected if I were the one to capture and tie you up.”

     “Mm. I’m certain I would be.” She walked over to Anaira, bending over with her hands on her knees to get on her level, like she was speaking to a child, “Darling, have you forgotten all those times you’ve called me a beast?...” She lifted a hand and grabbed her chin, “Anaira, I would eat you alive during a full moon. And, if I recall correctly…” She whispered, “The next one’s tonight…”

     Bloody tears welled in Anaira’s eyes, her breathing accelerating.

     Ethel moved her gloved hand from her chin to her throat, “Or rather I should say…” She slowly squeezed, “Within the next hour…”

     “E-Ethel-” She choked. In a few quick seconds, Ethel removed her hand, pulled off her glove, and slapped her across the face. The impact echoed in the space, and left an immediate bright red mark. The impact was so harsh it disoriented her, making her dizzy.

     Red tears leaked down her cheeks as she squeezed her eyes shut, “What... what are you gonna do with me? K-kill me?” She forced herself to look at the masked woman, her unreadable features terrifying. 

     “I should.” Ethel responded. “I will. But for now, I’d like to keep you. Who knows if we'll need an offering or sacrifice during the apocalypse? You and your little friends will serve good bait if needed.”

     Anaira’s eyes widened, “You- you got Rudy?”

     “If you’re referring to one of those humans you so nobley left behind, then yes. What a good person you are, to take off without a second thought.”

     Anaira dropped her head in shame. Ethel scoffed a chuckle, “How pitiful.” She said quietly, and slowly left the room. When Anaira heard the door click shut she broke down into tears. She cried until she had nothing left in her.

     All alone in the cold, deafening silence, only hearing he own thoughts bouncing around her head. The chill ran to the bone. Her breath fogged like smoke in the air, and she shivered. Shivered from the cold, from fear, from the anger she had towards both Ethel and herself. Maybe the colony was better off without her.

     When Ethel finally returned hours later, she nearly knocked the door off of its hinges. She fell on her hands and knees and let out a crazed, wild laugh, and she said with a growl, “Guess who's turning! Oh, yes, you've never seen me turned before, have you? Oh, we're all turning tonight.” She crawled over to her, a strain in her voice, "How much damage do you think I can do with claws?"

     Anaira watched with wide eyes as Ethel started to transform right in front of her. She was growing wilder than an animal, the sounds purely unnatural. Her whole body grew, stretching out her clothes as her limbs distorted and grew fur. Her sharp claws scratched into the concrete.

     Anaira had to get out of here, and there was only one way that would be possible. Her powers were unlocked now that it was night. Though she was so low on strength… but she could do it. She could.

     She closed her eyes and focused her breath. It took so much concentration and power. She felt her weak heart beat with whatever little blood it pumped. Before Ethel could attack, she was engulfed in black smoke, turning into a bat, out of her bonds. She flapped her wings as hard as she could and flew her way through the halls while Ethel growled.

     She flew up the stairwell, and out an open window. Ethel completely knocked down the door as she ran after her on all fours. Anaira flew through the trees, disoriented from the dark, and the wind, and her low magic. She felt herself grow dizzy, and before she knew it, she briefly blacked out.

     Her frail wings gave out on her as she lost consciousness. When she came back to she was falling from the sky, and there wasn't a thing she could do about it. She collided in the snow, breaking her fall. She heard the crunch of snow and growling approach her.

     Ethel picked her up by the wings, pinching them together with her claws. She growled a laugh and held her up in front of her face, her mask perfectly fitting her muzzle. Her voice was almost an echo, an unnatural tone.

    “Oh, Anaira… when will you learn you can’t run from me?”

Hell yeah back into the whumpy shit (just with different characters lol)

I really love vampire werewolf rivalries (and rivalries in general) so this shit is so fun for me. Also I can feel my alien phase returning which is good because, uh, aliens next part? 👀

(Also whumpy-wyrms you are the reason I felt motivated to buckle down and finish this so thank you 👍)

Taglist: @parasitebunny @whumpy-wyrms @fruitypinapple00 @otterfrost

Lmk in the comments if you want added or removed !

Thanks for reading !! 💕🦌

[just-my-latest-hyperfixation]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

Tagged by the amazing, sexy, incredible @wormdebut - thanks, love! ❤️

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Eighteen and and a whole batch of new ones incoming for the @steddieholidaydrabbles - so excited, weeeeeee!!!

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

308,387

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Stranger Things

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Hic sunt dracones 

Someone who cares

Possession

See you in a crown

Just add water         

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes, always! (Well, except for the rude ones but I can count those on my fingers, thank God!) Every single comment is so fucking precious to me. You didn’t only take the time to read my story, but you liked it enough to go to that little box and tell me your thoughts? Kissing you, kissing you, KISSING YOU!!! 😘

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I’m a happy endings gal all the way! If I’m gonna put them through the horrors for hundreds of thousands of words, I damn well wanna give them their happily ever after! That being said, I have this little microfic where tentacle lake monster Steeb enthralls Eddie to lure people to him so that he can eat them. Sorry, Eddie! 

(He’ll absolutely bring him O’Donnell and Principal Higgins, so it’s fine.) 

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Hic sunt dracones! I mean hello? They are mates and Steve is King and everyone is happy and my boy gets flower crowns and apple pie and hot, hot dragon sex forever after! 

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Someone once felt the need to leave me a very passive aggressive comment on how my Brit slips were “completely ruining the vibe” of my fics (and then I wrote a microfic about British!Steve, I’m still laughing). 

Oh, and then there was that one time I was accused of racism. 

But apart from that, everyone has been lovely and fantastic and supportive and I really love it here. I’ve met so many more lovely people than assholes. 

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Ummm … I’m the person with the 100k dragon porn fic. Hell yes, I write smut! I love writing smut, all kinds of smut!

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

No, sorry, my brain doesn’t do crossovers. XD 

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Nope. 

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No, but I’d be thrilled to see it happen. Any and all transformative works are always welcome, just be sure to tag me because I’d love to see them and you will have my sword and my axe for eternity and I will scream about it forever!

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I once co-wrote an original work with a friend when we were like 15? We had no idea what the fuck we were doing and it never got finished, but it was a blast!

14. What’s your all time favorite ship?

Steddie. I love them, I’m obsessed with them, I think I’ll be writing fic for them for the rest of my life!

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

I’m committed to finishing all of my WIPs, that’s why I’m a good girl and only ever work on one large fic at a time with smaller projects on the side, but there’s SO MANY I WANNA WRITE STILL!!!!

16. What are your writing strengths?

Several people have told me that I’m really good at scene setting and evoking imagery, at painting very vivid pictures in their minds …  so I guess there’s that. 

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I wish I could write stunning, creative metaphors like @wynnyfryd . The river Styx one from the trailer park AU? Blew me away! I could never come up with that!

I also admire @wingedquill for being able to be concise and still so fucking intense in their fics! I'm a wordy bitch myself and always in awe of that skill.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I’ve never been in a situation where I was faced with the decision, but I think I’d rather describe it instead of typing out the actual words? Such as “they exchanged a few sentences in Spanish”. I’m only fluent in one language besides English, so I feel like I’d either need to get help or include a horrifically mangled Google translation and end up being unintentionally hilarious.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

The first fandom I published for was Stranger Things. 

The first fandom I wrote for was Harry Potter, back before it went to shit (Wolfstar shipper of the very first hour here)

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Hic sunt dracones, my beloved! This fic is everything I ever wanted, both in terms of writing and the echo it received. I still daydream about these two (and have another bonus drabble coming in December). 

Zero-pressure tags: @cranberrymoons, @gorgeousgreymatter-x, @lexirosewrites

[theysangastheyslew]

Hey!!!

I want to share more suffering with you, homie haha *crying*

What do you think of the episode? Especially 132 part ofc!

Hi friend! :'))))))))) Ooooooh honey that gif is such a mood XD I’ve been trying to collect my thoughts and this is the best I can do atm. Sorry it’s kind of wordy but here we go 🥲

Ok! So ever-present pacing issues aside, the overarching story made for a solid episode and the animation was incredible. Hell, even the things I disliked objectively looked well-done out of context. Overall, that was no small feat to pull off, especially in such harsh working conditions. I truly do want to acknowledge that.

But in regards to 132, you guys already put into words how I feel better than I could. I may not have anything new to add, but I’ll say what I liked first and then put my issues under a cut.

As someone who actually really likes Yams’ art style, I loved that they consistently kept Hange’s face accurate to the manga. It was really inconsistent throughout the final season and they struggled to not make it too short a lot of times. Hange was always still stunning of course but the difference always stuck out to me. Here everyone was drawn well, but you can tell she got some extra attention.

The way they inched Levi closer to where Hange was sitting while talking with Yelena. Insignificant yeah but consistent with their past behavior. Also I’m glad they tweaked the position of his bandages so it looked less like they were painfully tugging upwards on his nose.

The pained expressions of the kids and Hange watching Levi struggle to even hold his gear

The “unrequited love” exchange. It had most of the softness and emotion from the manga even though the weight of that line will never be realized in non-written form. The camera lingered on each frame in a way that conveyed the sentiment. This is what got my hopes up that they would stay truer to the source material with DYH.

I'm so glad they left in Hange's lines to Flochroach about not giving up. Helps show—once again—that they wanted to live

The choked way Levi said “Devote your heart” + Hange’s widened eye and soft gasp at his words. Though not tearing up like in the manga, the shot still looked lovely for the half second it lasted. He doesn't pause halfway through saying it though so this one I'm still wrestling with.

Of course, the last stand. Onscreen, Hange took out at least 16 colossals (including the ones we see trip and get trampled) and definitely more offscreen (when they cut away to show other characters) and for the last few, did it while in the most pain a human body can feel. 7/10 for combat, my ass. Idk about y’all but I can’t stop hearing Romi Park’s screams in my head. I knew it would be nauseating and brutal but dear God. At the same time I cannot put into words how proud I am of them. That's my commander 💜

Ok “like” is definitely not the right word for this but I had wondered when I first read 132 how Hange’s gas tank was so well-insulated that it didn’t ignite, and.. well I got my answer.

I’m thankful that they didn’t show a glimpse of Hange’s bloody, crushed remains the way you see in the og panel. That at least felt respectful to me. This is wishful thinking I know but the defined charred outline makes me choose hope they fell more off to the side from where the titans were walking so at least there was maybe still a body left to recover someday.

The afterlife scene, the kids all sobbing their hearts out, Levi holding his own hand in the aftermath trying to process what just happened, and Onyankopon confirming the plane’s significance all really were appropriately gut-wrenching.

I really recommend taking a little break between The Rumbling and Sinners. It definitely makes the shift in emotion less jarring and less

When I did that with my rewatch it helped with the flow of things.

Ok, now twist me up and call me a pretzel bc here there be some salt :|

I’ll try to leave out my og issues with the manga chapter itself (like how painfully obvious it was all just to make Armin commander and how unnecessary Hange dying was IN THE FIRST PLACE and IF it had to happen at all how it could have been done at the final boss skelepalooza showdown, etc.) and just focus on the episode.

Goes without saying but it bears repeating: pacing. 75% of my issues with the execution of DYH would be gone if they just slowed down a bit. Just let the weight of it sink in a little. That this moment —all shreds of shipping aside— is the end of the line for these two heroes who have been supporting each other for ten years while bearing the weight of the world on their shoulders. But Mappa completely reversed the timing of the sequence of events. In the manga we had a longer, more intimate farewell followed by a last stand that was so short even when you knew it was coming it left you reeling from how fast it was from start to finish. Whereas here they hurried it along to get to the “main event”. Hell, it flows better in gif sets than it does in the actual show.

To me, it felt like Hange’s demeanor didn’t really change from talking with the kids to speaking with Levi, making their false bravado seem like less of a front. I know their tone was meant to sound like they were keeping up appearances, but with how often Hange just gets reduced solely to being a titan freak the way they had Romi say the lines made it sound like actual excitement, especially with the way they drew Hange's facial expressions (more on that next)

Hange’s little smirk after the salute. I kinda get what they were trying to do here but to me it came off as very flippant and dismissive of Levi’s choice of words, especially since they all but got rid of their lips trembling and eye beginning to well up with tears. I wish we’d gotten the big fake smile and laugh because that would have shown better that Hange was overcompensating by trying to put their brave face back on after starting to lose their composure. Their fear is obvious in the manga but it just simply didn’t come through as well throughout this entire exchange.

Sooo Hange almost tears up when Pieck said their words inspired her yet minutes later when their Best Friend tries to say goodbye there’s nowhere near that kind of reaction? Sure, Jan

Levi’s face. Ok look. It’s not a lack of emotion on his part that bothers me. It’s that it’s an entirely different one to begin with. He looks bummed at first yes, but then that changes to what I’m guessing is supposed to be determination which comes off as anger or annoyance (kinda like what changed with his scene with Armin on the stairs). They removed what made this parting different from previous ones, which was the sense of open vulnerability and the dawning realization that now he’s going to have to let Hans go too. See it's not like they were in the middle of the battle just yet. This situation came on suddenly and unexpectedly; it wasn't "supposed" to happen. One second they were on track and the next Hange is being torn away by fate. And yes, the highlights play a part in that transition. Anyone who draws eyes knows the importance of placement and intensity and the major impact they have over the final expression. And when drawing a comic you certainly don’t take up valuable page space with three panels focusing on the hope draining out of someone’s eyes if it wasn’t supposed to be the focus. I mean for fuck's sake, even the Final Season!Nendoroid Levi got it right. Plus, if they could make a point of getting Eren's eyes right during the raid on Liberio they could have gotten it here.

When the camera cuts to the kids watching the titans fall the angle doesn’t let you see that Levi can’t bring himself to watch for more than just a second

NOT MAPPA’s FAULT but since I’m being whiny right now I’m going to add that while ACWNR is a mixed bag to begin with, WIT’s adaptation not including Levihan’s introduction saddens me bc Levi asking Hange to keep watching loses a bit of extra oomph.

Really it just comes down to the fact that there was nothing wrong with the original page. It wasn’t overdone or dragged out by any means but considering many other scenes got shot-for-shot depictions I don’t think we were asking for anything outrageous by wanting a faithful adaptation. The couple frames we got that were almost perfect were so freakin fast you barely had time to process them before it cut away.

I wanted to like it, I really did. Especially since MAPPA did so many things so incredibly well as a whole. My expectations weren’t high, and I did want to give it the benefit of the doubt. But when it came to DYH, it felt both watered down and disjointed, like a completely different scene.

But so it goes. At the end of the day, Hange still dies a horrifying, demeaning death for plot convenience, and Levi is left behind to suffer once again. It was always going to hurt and I was never going to be ready for it, no matter how it was done.

[starfinss]

OHMTOGD im so happy it’s kicking the gear and getting you to write, i have so many ideas but i suck at writing and it just dies in my brain hyughhh

anyways smut is totally fine, that is up to you. Mmm i genuinely and really do like your works since you take the time to really write the development between the reader snd the love interest. I just love the idea on how it builds up from how they became hot headed rivals to confused about their own feelings to doubts/insecurities now dawning on them as they accept the fact they got ✨the feels✨ to them having that misunderstanding where they accidentally hurt each other then either one accidentally confesses in the heat of the moment or the avatar gang gets tired of it so they have to step in.

AND TO BE MORE SPECIFIC I like the idea of Sokka trying SO SO SOOOO HARD to not flat out tell Zuko word for word “Dude she LIKES YOU” when Zuko confides his thoughts about the reader to him but INSTEAD drops all these hints at him. (Not so) Passively spelling out to him how the reader truly feels.

ex. Zuko: I don’t know why she’s suddenly so… cold around me. All I said is that I really like her as a friend! Isn’t that no reassuring?!?

Sokka: Yeah yeah dude, I mean ANYONE who is SUPPOSEDLY YOUR FRIEND would be HAPPY TO HEAR you say that BUT SOME OF US want to be MORE THAN JUST FRIENDS YA KNOW

Zuko: … best friends?

Sokka facepalms

I am crying laughing at nearly four in the morning, I HAVE TO WRITE THIS AND WILL GOD PLEASE TELL ME MORE, I LOVE when people get involved with requests like this, it genuinely makes me so happy.

Your bit with Sokka there killed me because I wouldn’t put it past Zuko to misinterpret Sokka saying that bit (which I may very well use in the fic) as Sokka telling Zuko he liked him, and Sokka just slamming his head into his hands in despair.

Zuko: Sokka, I’m flattered. Really, I am. But I just don’t see you that way. I’m sorry.

Sokka, shrilly, his head buried in his hands: OH, SPIRITS GIVE ME STRENGTH.

At some point, Toph gets involved and she just like, traps them in an earth tent or something, just to force them to TALK IT OUT and she’s just like “I’m not letting you idiots out of there until you start communicating like normal people.”

This dynamic brings me so much joy and amusement, and I implore you to PLEASE tell me more, because at the rate the ideas are piling up, this is gonna potentially be a multi-part fic, because with how wordy my writing tends to be, it’ll end up pretty long with everything I want to fit into it.

Tell me more, tell me more, I’m invested now, hehe.

[nemesis-is-my-middle-name]

Thank god is not just me who mourns the loss of flavor to Emmet's dialogue. I too love how short and choppy his sentences are, to the point, no words wasted, a fantastic contrast to how comparatively wordy Ingo is. Which makes sense, as they're mirrors of each other in many ways! iirc in Japanese Ingo is also very formal while Emmet is much more casual in the way he talks, which I think translated to English pretty well, although obviously some nuance is lost because we don't have different formal levels built in like Japanese does.

I think you captured that well in oop too, as Emmet lacks the level of politeness that Ingo has, and he's a lot more blunt. It's well matched to how you've written Emmet in the first arc too, with his near single-mindedness in finding Ingo, and how it puts characters like Rei and Cyllene at ease. I've always kind of thought that the blunt way he talked, his blatant honesty and confidence without any frills, was what got Cyllene to trust him. She's very similar in that regard, which I think is probably part of what made Rei trust him so fast in turn (well, that and he's a kid who is floundering and desperate to have an Adult take charge and give them direction, especially an adult who showed him kindness and care in the way he righted Rei's rails when he started to panic)

YEAAH YEAH okay i am also glad this is not just like... a me observation. like i don't play ex so i hadn't really looked at the quotes before now and... why did they do that to my man... it feels so wroooong

and re: what you were saying about translations, yeah, maybe the ex voice is the more accurate translation, i. would not really know, but like. rip to japanese players for missing out on emmet's incredible eng bw cadence if it's true. it's simply the far superior version... i'm sorry...

+ the thing abt him having an opposing voice to his brother!! like yeah, imho you REALLY lose that contrast in ex because english just does not have the same kind of obvious registers for formality. the bw dialogue is sooo much better in terms of making a really clear contrast btwn them... and also i know i said it before but the eng bw voice is just like. better? more interesting? it has more Character in it? im tryna sound objective and all here really what i mean is i love it and am obsessed with it.

ANYWAAAY waaah yeah!! like i said idc what they do with emmet in newer games they can pry his bw cadence out of my cold dead hands. and i'm REALLY REALLY GLAD it comes across in oop... i think i've said before that he's one of my fav characters to write bc he is just so unique in the way he talks and just sort of. his character generally. in such a perfect way. he's blunt and direct and incredibly purposeful and. with all of the careful hop-stepping and social maneuvering and mind games going around in pla it is SO fun to write a character who actively refuses to fuck around like that even a little bit. and yeah!! i think it can be both very disarming and very reassuring to people.

like cyllene you are exactly right!! they only spent a very brief time together but i REALLY love the idea of them interacting anyway. cyllene i think is someone who has a very specific way of reading and interpreting others, and to her it just came across so strongly how much emmet meant what he was saying, and how driven and simultaneously caring he was, and. like i said. both disarming and reassuring. i think she likes and trusts him an inadvisable amount already.

[starsarefire824]

Hiyaaaa Jess! Here for the ask game 💛💙I got sooo much to say so here we go

•A compliment

You are such a talented writer! The way you can immerse the reader into the story and transport them to whatever scene is happening. Your descriptors and descriptions are nothing to play around with and you capture complex feelings in short, precise words. Whenever I read a chapter of yours, I'm devasted (in the best way) bc it sits with me and I can reflect and even reread the newly posted chapter all over again cuz it's that impactful into my mind. You just get teenagehood so well, the messy ugly sides of it, and I respect that 100%

•Why you follow me

Honestly its cuz you're a real cool person! And you're not afraid to speak your mind which reflects in your awesome storytelling skills

•A cute message

Wanna let you know when that escape convict man was running wild, I got my whole fam to pray for your wellbeing and safety so your neck of the woods would be protected 🙏🏽

•One thing you want to know about me

Also what's your fav food? You know I'm a foodie so I always appreciate what's the next meal to eat lol 😋

I tried not to do them all since I don't send you asks that much and I try not to get too wordy, but had to let a moot know how awesometacular they are point blank period!!!

P.S. read your latest chapter and the madwheeler got me in my feels

Okay I've been sitting on this one for a couple days because 😭😭😭

You are just too kind. And one of the sweetest people with some of the best takes I've come to on here. Honestly not sure what to do about the first two parts of this other than get all shy and say thank you. So thank you love. It means more than you know. As for the writing thing, I do find teenagers really interesting to delve into their inner lives because, welp, we were all teens once, and the way they feel the world is so visceral and selfish and a lot of times black and white and dealing with a LOT of things in their life that are so complicated and very hard and adult and I don't think teenagers are given enough credit. So to be able to explore some different things in fanfic is always fun! Also, for me personally, it helps by looking back on my own experience and trauma that I experienced as a teenager ( and put it into something healthy. I put A LOT of love and care into my writing and so its just nice when someone like you (who always engages with such intelligence and deep thought) tells me that they get something out of it! Truly just makes me happier than ever!

Oh god, that you told your whole family to pray for me 😭😭. that's the cutest shit i've ever heard! what a wild ride that was!

Oh??? Favorite food?? I think I'd have to say sushi. Japanese, Korean, or traditional Chinese are for me! ☺️ The others I got are nachos or any street-style Mexican food and Italian! I make a mean classic alfredo and ?! 😋 You've met another foodie so sorry if that was like TOO MUCH FOOD.

For the Ask Game <3

[once-in-a-blue-moon-rising]

Fire Dancing with Snow is getting some upgrades!

So. If you are one of the people subscribed to FDWS (sorry) you are probably aware that I've not posted any new chapters in a while. And in part that was life being overwhelming, but after a while it was because I decided to write Major Revisions instead, which took longer than I thought it would. But, regardless, it's been a little abandoned, even though I've thought about it a lot.

The trouble is, upon re-reading the whole thing (curse past me for being So. Fucking. Wordy), I realised I don't really like it. And that's not me being unnecessarily insecure, I don't think, because I do usually like my writing. I love When It Rains, and there are certain bits that I've re-read dozens of time, just for fun, because damn it, this is exactly what I want in a fic.

But FDWS doesn't feel like that. There are parts that I think are boring, and parts where I've just completely failed to explain what's going on, even if I have a vague recollection of knowing how I got to the point on the page. And I don't think my continued dedication to the sickfic format works so consistently, when I'm tackling canon. It feels forced, in places. And my characterisation is slipping too.

So... before writing anything new, I'm going to do a bit of an overhaul. I'm going to go back and change what I don't like. I'm going to tighten it up so it's not so unnecessarily long and unruly. Between the last chapter I wrote of FDWS and now, I think I've done two really key things that should put me in a space to genuinely improve it: I've been reading again, for fun, and I had a very lovely friend beta Major Revisions. God, feedback is so, so useful.

Once I've edited a chapter, I will be adding a note stating the date of the update in the notes.

Obviously I don't need to announce this - it's my fic and I can do what I like with it - but it's nice to get the feelings out. I also think it might be nice for other writers, maybe. Because fanfiction isn't a finished product, at least for those of us who write as we go; and sometimes it just doesn't turn out how we wanted. And it's ok to go back and edit, if you want. Just as it's ok to love and adore your writing in all its meandering, unpolished glory.

Anyway, if you think I've lost my mind and you want to have a version of the original, go download it from AO3, I've not started yet. Or, if you see this post once I've started making the edits, I've downloaded the pdf, epub and html versions, so DM me and I'll send you whichever of those you'd like.

Chapters I've edited so far:

Chapter 1 - 1 March 2023

Chapter 2 - 28 March 2023

[asexualjedi]

Like I get it. It was 2 weeks late. But I tried to get an extension before it was due bc I was having a family emergency. And she goes… I’m so sorry to hear that I know it’s really hard, I’m going through the same thing with my dad. Anyways I can’t give you an extension. You should ask the school what they can do for you or if there are any services. Girl. What do you think I’m doing now?!?? What can they do for me that you can’t. It’s your class!!! And then. Like so I have the family emergency the first week. And then. And the end of that week we had a hurricane!!! I lost power!!! We missed class bc of said hurricane… and she assigned us a written assignment tto do by the end of the weekend. I got my power back Sunday and managed to finish that. But also!!! I’m in a clinic which child clients!! I had time sensitive stuff and I’d rather fuck over my gpa then these children’s lives. And I told her all this right right and she goes. Well it wouldn’t be fair to the other students. But. I know someone who turned it in 2 or 3 days before me…and she got a grade. You graded thwt. Like I’m not asking for a good grade but this is 23% maybe mroe of my grade. My mom!!! Told me I was fake!! She thought I was trying to kill her!!! I came to you in tears about this and you have been like on the face sympathetic but have not helped me out at all idk. It’s just. For the feminist legal theory class of it all too. And she knows I have disabilities that make me work slower bc I had her last year and we spoke about this idk man. Like I get it it was 2 weeks late I get it. But like. Idk. It. from the start the whole. Well that sucks. Anyways no extension. Like. Yeah we had time to do it earlier in the month. You know what I was doing earlier in the month. Helping with my mom still!!! She should now this she said her dad is dealing with it. I just don’t get how someone can be so nice and also just not give a shit. Also my friend said she got a good grade but all the feedback was just very nitpickey “wording” “wordiness” “I wouldn’t have used an Oxford comma here” which on one hand I get but also this specifically like legal theory writing. Like you use certain words and techniques on purpose that’s the whole point. Like one of the theories we covers is all about how we need to break away from these white centric norms via law academic writing and shift towards different stuff idk. Idk. I’m. Maybe I’m just upset. Like she’s perfectly within her rights to do this. I just. she gave me a c when I really don’t think I earned a c in her tax class. So I knew there was a risk but also nothing else fit in my schedule. Bc the school fucked up the scheduling last semester. But. God. Pls I gotta like get a 100 on these next two papers and I do always participate in class a bunch. Soo like I guess I could get a 70 something so that’s like :/ a d or a c. Idk. Like I am spending money to do this!! I sent you the paper. Idk. I’m going to ask if she can give me feed back at least or if there is any way I can do any sort of extra credit. She might be willing to do the former but I’m not getting my hopes up. God. Like. Christ. Almighty. Idk if I should talk to the Dean about thsi who told me to if like if I have trouble with this kinda stuff te family problems. Bc like it was 2 weeks late right. That’s fair. It’s on me. But also!! There was a Hurricane!!! And I need to sleep and eat!!! I didn’t know I need to sleep on this.

Teacher just straight up not accepting the paper at all that’s cool whatver.

[orcelito]

1, 3 and 4 for discordant accord?

questions from here

skdlfjsldfjk thank u for sending some !!

1: What inspired you to write the fic this way?

Well! tbh discacc sorta started as impulse lmao. i'd been planning my magic prince au for a Month (which im still planning to do at some point) b4 i realized it was a bit too complicated a premise to have as my first fic. i decided i wanted to do smth Simpler, more straightforward, & so i wanted to do smth that in large part followed the plot of the game. built-in narrative outline like that. & when i thought about what i wanted to actually Do, i realized there were very few soulmate aus for this pairing, which i thought was weird considering how they really feel like soulmates of Some kind in the game. so i brainstormed what setup i wanted to do, since there's really So much u can do w/ a soulmate au. decided i wanted smth that got rid of the common pitfalls of the trope (Expected Romance between neat little pairs, lack of proper buildup to match the depth of the relationship, etc etc) and decided on the writing thing. built-in childhood friends au, which im a sucker for. and i was like. Yes. this is Perfect. brainstormed all of this in bed as well as the core plot things (like what happened in chapter 32 lol) and then the next day started writing. and i have not stopped writing yet. (magic prince au has thus gotten over a Year's worth of planning. when i can finally write it, it will be Glorious)

gonna put the other answers under a readmore so this doesnt get too long and also bc my answer to #3 has potentially triggering content (related to the tag on the post) SO

3: What’s your favorite line of narration?

i love a lot of parts of the fic but tbh my absolute fav individual part has GOTTA b from the first scene of chapter 14

Without thinking, he opened the scissors. He slowly pressed the point of one of the blades down, right in the center of the message. The pressure turned into pain, and he watched in morbid fascination as a pinprick of blood welled up beneath it.

If he wanted, he could slash up along his vein.

He could be

Just.

Like.

His.

Mother.

With a gasp, Goro threw the scissors across the room. They crashed into a wall, then fell to the floor with a clatter.

not quite a single line BUT. god. i wrote this whole scene in the like 30 minutes before dnd and it was all i could think about throughout it. the parallel to his mother was 100% unintentional, but as soon as i realized it i KNEW i had to capitalize on it. and i realized it where goro does in this, right where he's got the blade poised above his skin, JUST like his mom. and i wrote in his Horror at the realization, & how it snapped him out of it. & the setup of the line, how it's broken in his Horror, you can Feel it setting in............. Chef's Kiss

4: What’s your favorite line of dialogue?

ksjdflksdjf a hard question for a Single line of dialogue bc i love so much of the conversations, BUT. for a Single line. it’s Gotta be from the sunset scene in the beach chapter (chapter 26)

Akira tilted his head as he smoothed a thumb below Goro's eye. "On TV, you have all of those things… but it falls flat. You're always pretty, but never in the way you are when it's just us two." He shifted his hand to cup Goro's cheek. "When it's just us, there's such a depth to your eyes… They're always alive with so much emotion."

Goro leaned his face into Akira's touch. Their foreheads almost brushed together with how close they were. Their breaths mingled in a way Goro always thought he'd hate, but found himself not minding with Akira. He stared into his eyes, waiting for whatever Akira would say next.

Akira moved infinitesimally closer, until there was barely any distance between their lips. He whispered, "They call our eyes the windows into our souls, so it's no wonder I think yours are so beautiful."

THIS SHIT ^^^^^^^^^^ that line of akira’s at the end (with the stuff b4 listed for context) it’s just. lskjdflskjdfskldfj. when i thought up that line i practically Yeeted myself out of bed to write it down bc GOD. it’s so fucking romantic. i love it so much. that whole scene was Sooooo good but God. akira pulling out all the stops. who knew this boy could be so romantic. 

[ghostboyjules]

weeeeellllll hey folks! Finally back again - after ages of promising this - with Hob's playlist. I'm definitely not gonna be as wordy this time, mostly because I am Tired™, but hopefully these songs and their lyrics speak for themselves better than I could anyway. I'd like to dedicate this beast to these particular wonderful humans; @wordsinhaled, @wizardofgoodfortune, ily'all 🥺 y'all keep me creative <3 and to @landwriter for the amazing title inspo and just being super dope and having excellent Hob Gadling character takes in general.

This playlist is a lil more structured than Dream's was, so I don't recommend listening on shuffle, at least for the first time through, lol. I also have marked in my notes which songs relate to which like. Span of years, but tbh that could be kinda flexible, so use your heart ig asjhfvafbab Without further ado, below the cut will be my lyric selections and small note thingies. If you've read even this far, I thank you *mwah* (yes there's 30 songs I'm SORRY I can't be stopped 😭)

1389 –

Avi Kaplan – I’m Only Getting Started

[Verse 1]

Eyes clouded, blood on my face

No mercy coming my way

Yeah, I'm only getting started

Cracked knuckles, fist shaking

These rivers run, but I'm staying

Yeah, I'm only getting started

OKAY... thought this was kind of a cool one to open up with, plus the interesting thing about making this playlist is that I feel like I have a very linear sort of character progression to work off of, which is fun.. so this song speaks to me of that rough and tumble merc/bandit Hob of 1389... been through some shit, lost family,

Alice In Chains – Rooster

[Verse 2]

Walkin' tall machine gun man

They spit on me in my homeland

Gloria sent me pictures of my boy, mm-mm

Got my pills 'gainst mosquito death

My buddy's breathin' his dyin' breath

Oh God, please, won't you help me make it through? Mm-mm

[Chorus]

Here they come to snuff the Rooster, aw yeah

Yeah, here come the Rooster, yeah

You know he ain't gonna die

No, no, you know he ain't gonna die

this gives me very much merc or soldier Hob, kinda unhinged a lil bit cause he definitely should have died a few times there…but he didn’t.

The Mountain Goats – Up the Wolves

[Verse 1]

There's bound to be a ghost at the back of your closet

No matter where you live

There'll always be a few things, maybe several things

That you're going to find really difficult to forgive

There's gonna come a day when you feel better

You'll rise up free and easy on that day

And float from branch to branch

Lighter than the air

Just when that day is coming, who can say? Who can say?

makes me think about maybe after a long time at war or fighting as a merc or any plethora of things honestly, he’s like struggling with that.

Emigrate, Cardinal Copia – I’m Not Afraid

On the street that I remained

Some have made another hole

Could it be that I'm to blame?

When the ground has turned so cold

Can it be an audacing?

Can it be a guarded hole?

And what we say is just a game

The one we play 'til we get old

All, all the hands I have laid

All written along my face

I'm not afraid of anything

I just let it go

And now I take on everything

To get out from the hole

maybe avoiding thinking about things just so that he’s able to be the kind of man he wants to be rather than the kind the world is wanting to turn him into…but then he has to think abt them to come to terms with them (also no matter what I do,it will not recognize 'audacing' as a word but I googled it and everything so...lmao)

1489 -

Ryn Weaver – New Constellations

[Verse 2]

There's no walls and no ceilings as far as I know

Just the echoes of scars and the unbeaten road

Trip the gun on cautions that I've been sold

'Cause it's hard to believe that it's wrong to want more

Than the truest of blue and a love like a roar

I will run to wherever I want to go, oh

[Chorus 2]

Charting Neptune by the fire of the Sun

I'm looking for new constellations, new constellations

[Verse 3]

So keep callin' me crazy 'cause I never learned

You should stop loving fire because you got burned

Now it feels like I'm living some sick déjà vu

Like the answers were there when I stared into you

"What if there's more? What if there's more?" The more I look into this the more I want to cry about 1489 Hob and all the things he's seen.. I was on the Wiki page for ‘Spherical Earth’ and the years it was giving me... god he sure was just. there for that. the number of things we know to be just. absolute FACT, now that were kinda up in the air for the majority of his 600+ years??? are you kidding me? the maps the books the science the

Dawes – Living In The Future

[Verse 1]

I know all of my exits

I'm always planning my escape

It's the most aggressive symptom

Of this collective phantom pain

And the more that you ignore it

The more it makes you go insane

Just look around

[Chorus]

We're living in the future, so shine a little light

It may not make it any better, I'm just hoping that it might

I'm not talking about forever, how about just getting through the night?

We're living in the future, so shine a little light

ANXIETY… doesn’t wanna be caught being immortal…but also amazed and trying to see the brighter side of things, wanting to learn

Good Tiger – Salt of the Earth (Acoustic)

I tightened my grip

Around my bow

I'll try to save you all

Knuckles turning white

Blood runs cold

There's a boy with no face

I don't feel there's much separation

I'm an animal

Hope leaves when the waves come crashing

I've never been a religious man

But I'm slipping under drowning

In your eyes

I've never been a religious man

But I'm slipping under drowning

In your

More themes of being animalistic.. kinda nightmare-ish huh … this makes me think of maybe him having nightmares trying to help him understand how he really felt about all the killing he’s had to do, while also hungering so so deeply for more. More life, more knowledge, more people, more experiences. An animal wanting ..

1589 –

Hozier – Angel of Small Death and the Codeine Scene

[Verse 2]

Feeling more human and hooked on her flesh, I

Lay my heart down with the rest at her feet

Fresh from the fields, all fetor and fertile

It's bloody and raw, but I swear it is sweet

[Verse 3]

In leash-less confusion, I'll wander the concrete

Wonder if better now having survived

The jarring of judgement and reason's defeat the sweet

Heat of her breath in my mouth; I'm alive

I’m looking at this song as him falling in love with Eleanor, and I really like whenever they’re depicted as having this kind of.. definitely unconventional type of relationship for the time, and also maybe both being just a smidge unhinged, because Hob certainly is and I could absolutely see him being smitten with Eleanor because she’s maybe, kind of odd or something.. who’s to say..

Fair to Midland – A Seafarer’s Knot

[Verse 1]

Lucky are the leaves of the clover

She's digging for chemistry with the butcher's tools

Shifty are the eyes of the gambler

He's making his tricks his trade, and a job well done

[Pre-Chorus]

Through the motions, waving wishes

To your confidence and eloquence

[Chorus]

He's turning a-green from these envious glorious things

Applied ambitious faith that can keep us all safe

Invoking a blue that's meant for us too

What small amazing things we will turn to rain

Fair to Midland is one of my favorite bands of all time, so I was saving them for something special lol. A lot of the time Darrow’s lyrics don’t make.. a huuge amount of linear sense, but I feel like these are straightforward enough to take enough meaning. This, to me, feels like an examination of what Hob did to get to 1589, and perhaps some of the feelings behind that.

(bonus, made me think of the toast scene…ow)

[Bridge]

Gather 'round, hold your glasses up high

Drink to love while we wait for high tide

Keep it short, keep it brief, you have my word

Gather 'round while we wait for high tide

Everything Everything – Blast Doors

[Chorus]

Down in my beast heart, I build an empire

Whenever I'm blind, I open my wild eye

(repeated)

[Bridge]

I hear the death rattle of a time wasted

Time wasted

You know that I believe in it

You know that I believe in it

But I'm wasted

Back again with ‘animal hunger’ Hob. With this one I was really thinking about how… he really wanted to impress his stranger… only to be barely spoken to and then walked away from with no explanation. Like yes that hurts initially, but I’m thinking about all of the things he had to do to get there, I’m sure he didn’t like a lot of it.. and then to find out he pretty much wasted a lot of his time for an idea that had turned out to be wrong? oof

Ray LaMontagne – Such a Simple Thing

[Verse 2]

Take it if you want it

I'm so tired I just don't care

Can't you see how much you hurt me?

It's like I wasn't there

[Chorus]

Tell me what your heart wants

Such a simple thing

My heart is like paper

Yours is like a flame

I mean… -motions to lyrics- asfjvnfnb. Teehee abandonment issues lolololol

1689 –

40 Watt Sun – Stages

If I was only wise enough

To know everything sure and true about myself

You would not be here

What have I brought you to, my love, that you have followed me?

It is all my heart is worth

And more than I would ask of you

Y’all I’m so sorry that this is a 16 min song aldkfjgadj feel free to like, just look at the lyrics if you don’t have the brain space for the full thing, but I kind of forgot that it was so long until after I was so set on it 💀

Sleeping at Last – Jupiter

[Verse]

Wrote it down in the winter of 1610

Just a secret under lock and key until then

While collecting the stars, I connected the dots

I don't know who I am, but now I know who I'm not

This song always has and always will ruin me,, I just love the line “I don’t know who I am, but now I know who I’m not” honestly just everything about that song… make my messes matter, make this chaos count.. (also had to include because.. 1610 lol)

Gregory Alan Isakov – If I Go, I’m Goin

And I will go if you ask me to

I will stay if you dare

And if I go, I'm goin' shameless

Let my hunger take me there

This house, she's quite the talker

She creaks and moans, she keeps me up

And the photographs know I'm a liar

They just laugh as I burn her down

This song just has very Hob energy, like I feel like he would like it, as well, but also just OOOOOOFFFF this do be hurtin….

The Moody Blues – Melancholy Man

[Chorus]

I'm a melancholy man, that's what I am

All the world surrounds me and my feet are on the ground

I'm a very lonely man, doing what I can

All the world astounds me and I think I understand

That we're going to keep growing, wait and see

Another case of -motions to lyrics- tbh

1789 –

Sleeping at Last – Pluto

[Chorus]

Until one day I had enough

Of this exercise of trust

I leaned in and let it hurt

And let my body feel the dirt

When I break pattern, I break ground

I rebuild when I break down

I wake up more awake than I've ever been before

“I rebuild when I break down” this is put here specifically to signify his,, literal rebuilding of himself after the struggle of the previous century,..

The Deep Dark Woods – The Place I Left Behind

I'm a good ole ramblin' boy

Now that's just what I am

This fair land that you call yours

I do not give a damn

I've got the ramblin' fever down in my bones

And everywhere that I wanna go

The only place that I ever loved

Is a place I left behind

Discontent, I think, with where he’s at currently. Still missing and grieving his family, I imagine he probably spends these years pretty alone, and that could be why he seemingly turns his goddamn brain off -_-

Tunng – Fatally Human

Fatally human

We hover in the world

Fatal someone

We flounder in the dark

Take hold of another

Go mad in a moment

The soil and the wonder

Sway to the terror

There’s not really a lot I can say here, but. Yeah.

1889 –

The Oh Hellos – I Have Made Mistakes

I have made mistakes

I have made mistakes, I continue to make them

And the promises I've made

The promises I've made, I continue to break them

And all the doubts I've faced

All the doubts I've faced, I continue to face them

But nothing is a waste

Nothing is a waste, if you learn from it

This song sounds like how Hob looks when he makes that little jab at himself about making and learning from mistakes… couldn’t get that idea out of my head. Plus this song just really hits.

Greg Puciato – Through the Walls

Winter, I'm out of tune

Heating frozen stars

I'll keep spilling my guts out to you

Wherever you are

Dragging my anchor through you

I want you to know

Me before this night is through

Then you'll never go

Careful to not disappear

Offering dreams to the dawn

Nothing's impossible here

Still we can't go on

I didn’t want to make anything TOO outwardly Dreamling, but like… this song, omg…

Tubeway Army – Are ‘Friends’ Electric?

[Chorus 1]

So now I'm alone

Now I can think for myself

About little deals and S.U's

And things that I just don't understand

Like a white lie at night

Or a sly touch at times

I don't think it meant anything to you

[Verse 3]

So I open the door

It's the 'friend' that I'd left in the hallway

"Please sit down."

A candlelit shadow on a wall near the bed

Made that last comment and then there’s this song WHOOPS sdkfgadfbaasfjghfb

1989 –

Marina – To Be Human

[Chorus]

All the people living in, living in the world today

We're united by our love, we're united by our pain (Ooh)

All the things that I've done and I've seen

Still, I don't know, don't know what it means

All of the little name drops and the meanings and.. it just gave me very much the century flying by so violently but also colorfully and SO much happening..

Orville Peck – Dead of Night

[Verse 3]

Six summers down, another dreamless night

You're not by my side

Scratch on the moon like a familiar smile

Stained on my mind

Some other town, someone else's life

Dead in the night

In the night

Ofc I had to add Orville… this song and it’s placement… I wanted it to feel purposeful, and I hope it does. Character and theme-wise, and also like irl things happening in those decades..

Danny Schmidt – This Too Shall Pass

[Verse 3]

We think too big, we think our self is one whole thing

And we claim that this collection has a name and is a being

But deep inside when every cell divides

Well, it sets upon the rule that states self-interest is divine

[Verse 4]

And cancer too lives by this golden rule:

That you must do unto the others as the others unto you

All for the best, because it's all that life accepts

And so we kill it like a buffalo: with awe and with respect

This song also gives me overall Hob vibes, musically and lyrically, but.. I just think about the kind of friends he made and the things he tried to do in this century. Helping the people he could and loving those he couldn’t help. The knowledge that yes, this too shall pass…

1990’s-ish – Went on a lil’bit of a bender

Alice in Chains – Would?

[Verse 2]

Drifting body, its sole desertion

Flying, not yet quite the notion

[Chorus]

Into the flood again

Same old trip it was back then

So I made a big mistake

Try to see it once my way

I feel like after 1989.. and the overwhelming barrage of a century that was, I feel like he has some, emotions to sort through. N and I talked a lot about grunge phase 90’s Hob and like yes very much influential here, but I think I’d associate him with Alice in Chains, regardless. Stone Temple Pilots too, I think.. there’s more lmao

Def Leppard – Animal

[Verse 1]

A wild ride, over stony ground

Such a lust for life, the circus comes to town

We are the hungry ones, on a lightning raid

Just like a river runs, like a fire needs flame

Oh, I burn for you

[Chorus]

I got to feel it in my blood, whoa, oh

I need your touch don't need your love, whoa, oh

And I want, and I need, and I lust, animal

And I want, and I need, and I lust, animal

This man fucks. Obvi

2022 –

The National – I Am Easy To Find

[Verse 1]

How long have we been here?

Am I ever coming down?

I need to find some lower thinking, if I'm going to stick around

I'm not going anywhere

Who do I think I'm kidding?

I'm still standing in the same place where you left me standing

[Chorus]

I am easy to find

The National will always be my favorite sad Dad band, I cherish them. I feel like Hob would also like them, but this song of course had to be added because. “I am easy to find.” …. ach

The Narcissist Cookbook – Joy! Joy! JoooOOY!

[Verse 2]

Tonight let's turn the shower on

Full blast and hot

Lie down in the bath like it's a casket or a cot

We'll try to sleep

But we won't sleep

I thought writing it down might make me wanna stop

But I want more and more

And more of this

Til there's no room in me

There’s not a lot I can say about this one either, just.

Broken Bells – Perfect World

[Verse 1]

Oh, London moon, help me stumble home

Let me lose myself along the way

I've got nothing left, it's kind of wonderful

'Cause there's nothing they can take away... away

[Bridge]

But it's another way to win a useless fight

You've been lying so long don't know when you're faking

See the water on the rise

Just another day into a useless night

I've been pushing so hard now my hands are shaking

See the water on the rise

This song is beautiful. I think I had a religious experience when I heard it for the first time a few years ago,,, it’s also just very much a Hob song to me. Not overly optimistic, but still down for life.. the struggles…

Avi Kaplan – Song For The Thankful

[Verse 3]

Goodbye evening, hello to the night

I'm not seein' the wrong from the right

Walkin' blindly on a path without an end

Then the morning comes and leads me out again

I thought this would be the perfect song to end on.. I hope I’m right.