#god is dead and we have killed him
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On episode two of Painkiller. These saleswomen have some real sapphic tension. There’s something in the air, I can smell it.
#painkiller netflix#this is a devastating series about the opioid-crisis and I am shitposting#god is dead and we have killed him#anyways it’s really touching and fascinating since the opioid crisis always fascinated me as a European citizen who only learned about it#via the internet and cultural knowledge as I got older#I feel really bad for the dad in that show… poor fella really. I hope he doesn’t end up dying#his family is so cute :(
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God is dead and we have killed him. This time is the last.
Being God is not just one mans hobby. It's closer to a job. Similarly to a Roman emperor, you are an omnipotent ruler, but just on a larger scale. And, of course, if you have a well defined role where you work at, it's easier than if you're "Brenda who knows all the ins and outs of the hellish accounting system".
Therefore, there have been many gods. I was the last. How does the process of change work? Of course, not by nepotism. Your son doesn't inherit the throne, why would he? As you're the god, you don't age. So, trial by combat. That's how it's picked. A mere mortal challenges you, perhaps wronged by the cosmos, perhaps just looking for "cool points". (Because let's be real. It's really cool to kill a god.) And so, the cycle begins. Certain, mostly small reforms.
Examplewise, Joseph, husband of the virgin Mary. Zeus, one of the current gods tried to seduce Mary. Joseph won the fight. So technically, Jesus was god's son. Thing is, they were wrong about it not being Joseph's son. Before Joseph, being a god was a team effort. Greek mythology pantheon and everything. But then, reform. Joseph became dictator, as was the style at the time. The Romans switched from power being held by a senate picking a few to lead the country to one man, merely twenty-seven years ago, so why shouldn't godhood be the same?
Then, getting too comfortable. Eventually, the cycle continues, again and again. Examplewise:
Fast forward roughly 1.8 thousand years. A man, Fredrik Nietzsche, challenges the god. He wins, but on one condition. He will only become god when he dies. Afterwards, he comes back to earth and writes "God is dead". Thanks to semantics, he was wrong, the current god would be dead soon. The position isn't in a threat. Also, he feared he'd be declared insane. So, he rewrote the context around the quote.
About how Christianity is "bound to collapse". Thing is, it didn't(!). Then, after roughly twenty years, he passed. The "wait until you die" clause was there to give Joseph the last laugh. His final statement as a god was "Nietzsche is dead -God".
Then, fast forward a hundred years. I, as a fool, decide to try getting the position of God. I mean why not? I win. Shocker, I know. Then, the cycle begins. Thing is, I'm determined to break it. So, a new system. A parliamentary democracy. Every single living creature, voting for the political party they believe in. If five percent or over of everybody votes for your party, you're in Parliament. Then, Parliament votes on issues. Yes, the parties have leaders, but they are nothing but figureheads. A charismatic voice, talking about what their party will do. The position of God is still there, but just as a figurehead. Every five hundred years, Parliament votes for a new God. Therefore, us humans have killed God. The position. It bears almost no resemblance to the original role except in name. So therefore, Nietzsche eventually became correct, even though he never expected it to be in this way.
-The end
#long post#God#I am dearly sorry if you read all that#I don't know what the hell that meant but my brain told me tto write it#writing#God is dead and we have killed him#oc
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dear lord the humans you put on this earth (my neighbours) are blasting a twenty one pilots remix in the year of 2023
#the remix is violins and a katy perry song mashed together with a twenty one pilots song#god is dead and we have killed him
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I was forced to make this against my will
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We're feeling the impacts of generational trauma in this chillis tonight
#Staring into the distance and remembering why it was that the parents didn't consider community and proper socialisation an important part#Of raising kids properly#In fact actively and specifically avoided it#Ran away into the woods#Literally#And not even in a fun way#God is dead and we have killed him#Nizche ass cultural connection nihilism nonsense#My posts#My life
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Watching Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron again as an adult is so great because not only do you appreciate the nostalgia and joy of it, the stunning 2D animation mixed with early 3D techonology and well written tight story with a main character that never speaks.
But also you appreciate that the plot relies on horses, despite not being typical talking horses in cartoons, being extremely intelligent to the point that they are aware of their captivity and exploitation. And it involves a hyper intelligent horse dismantling (or, at the very least significantly delaying) American colonialism's expansion into the west.
This horse also very likely killed many colonialists when they were either launched at high speeds from his back, kicked in the head or blown up in a train explosion.
Good for him.
#I also love how the humans continue to severely underestimate just how much damage this horse can do#imagine the Colonel rocking up to the train camp with the whole place on fire#so many men killed#all the horses gone with some probably getting stuck along the way because they're dragging literal chains#and he sees that goddamn buckskin mustang that wrecked his whole shit#and that he last saw jumping into a raging river#what a day he'd be having#that horse? played dead so he could kick off the chains on the horses and then sent a whole train rolling down a hill into another train#set the whole forest on fire - killed so many bystanders and probably woodland animals#this horse is a liability he just keeps wrecking our whole shit every time we capture him#seriously don't go near that horse I think he might be a god or something
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By the way, did we ever talk about how stupid it is that they made Silco the reason Felicia died? I don't mean that he killed her personally, but that he jumpstarted violence on a peaceful protest. Because that's sooo who Silco is, right? A character who makes impulsive and poorly thought out decisions, right? A character who goes into a fight headstrong without carefully planning his moves and strategy and just YOLO-ing it, right? Right?? ......sigh
And don't even THINK about giving me the whole "wElL hE cHaNgEd SiNcE tHeN dUh" crap. Even s2 is smart enough to show us him writing something in a notebook in a flashback, which implies that he was the brains behind the Lanes' creation/revolution as a whole. And if he was he would never sabotage his own plans with something so stupid as throwing a single molotov at enforcers. Literally who does that???? Silco we know would probably organize an attack under the guise of a peaceful protest, but not just. Straight-up ruining just a regular peaceful protest. That's stupid. And Silco is the last character in arcane that would do something stupid. Literally the whole plot of season 1 relies on him being intelligent and sneaky with his plans are you kidding me.
#i mean. silco DID do something stupid. that being his attempt to kill vi and cait near the water tower#but i'll actually close my eyes on this one because writers just couldn't allow him to kill them because they're part of the main cast. but#if he wanted he would've killed them then#with the rifle cait gave to the pharmacist for example *twirls hair* yeah you get it#stop assassinating him for the love of god he's already dead#silco arcane#arcane critical#arcane season 2#arcane#also i remember a post comparing him to jinx like. they accidentally killed their family when they only wanted to help#but that doesn't work for several reasons. first is ofc silco's character as i wrote above. and not only he is a different character he's#much older too. jinx was what? 9? when she blew up the cannery. while silco was in his mid-late 20s. you don't think the same in this age a#a nine year old. second is the circumstances. jinx only built a bomb with whatever she had at her hands at the time because she needed to#act fast. otherwise silco would kill her entire family. silco on the other hand started the whole thing. it would make a little bit more#sense if he threw a molotov as a reaction to enforcers beating someone up/arresting someone but we don't have this implication iirc#so. please please please don't try to find reason in bad writing i literally lose my sanity
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I am so not immune to a Medea moment. my beloved has left me. we had a life and a love and a child. my beloved has left me for another. I have lost my life and my love. I still have my child. my beloved deserves to pay. all he has ever really loved is our child. here is a stage. here is a role. here is the chorus to sing my sins. here is my beloved with his horrified gaze, fixed on me. here is my beautiful daughter. here I am, in her countenance, her phrasing, her cruelty and her mirth, mother that I am. punishing him. letting the light in. letting my daughter burn. and here I am, in those beautiful eyes of the girl I helped raise, the very last thing she ever sees before she dies. I am her and she is me; and all that is left of us both is utter agony
#lestat is so mother. haha im gonna fall apart that’s his baby girl#he was the last thing she saw before she died. and you could see it. coiled inside of him was an agony#a deep dark scream that he���ll never admit his body is holding. that was his beloved girl. his horrible monster daughter.#he would have enjoyed killing her and letting her kill him across centuries. she was supposed to die. she wasn’t supposed to stay dead.#claudia loved him and hated him. and she looked to him. because it was a cold comfort but a comfort nonetheless. and better than the burning#mother who enjoys punishing her daughter. mother who flinches from the marks left behind after punishment has been handed down#love does not save you from your mother’s immense cruelty. her immense cruelty does not prevent her from loving you.#madness!!!!#lestat de lioncourt#claudia de pointe du lac#claudia de lioncourt#iwtv#iwtv spoilers#amc iwtv#hey can we get#sam reid#delainey hayles#some Emmys please??? god. GOD. it’s so over gang#medea#jason and medea
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Unpopular opinion: by FAR the most interesting thing about Monty is his fucked-up relationship with Esther. And the forced transformation thing.
I thought I was completely bored by him as character, but then I realized shipping him with the main boys just doesn't really resonate with me, cause, like. He is still learning how to be a person. (Both in terms of thinking independently from Esther, and, like. Physically he's only been in a human body for a few days! 😅)
He wants Edwin because Esther designed him to. Like, yes, he eventually fell for him beyond her influence, but he was literally MADE to seduce Edwin, like. It's hard to argue he has agency there.
idk, I'm not trying to be a hater, but i think exploring Monty's relationship with Esther and his own body and autonomy is much more interesting than shipping him.
There's also the whole question of how much he's even capable of independent thought? Like, does he have human-sized thoughts inside his crow brain? And if so, is that only post-transformation, or has he always had that capability? When he's in human mode, how much of him is still just a bird puppeteering a vessel and following orders?
What does it even mean for him to be Esther's familiar? How old is he, really? Has she killed him before? Has he been any other animals, besides human and crow? Did he start out as a normal bird, or did she create him, like some kind of homunculus?? Was he ORIGINALLY a boy???
#I'm not anti shipping Monty i just have other questions!!#monty finch#monty the crow#dead boy detectives#dead boy detective agency#dbda#esther finch#by elise#i love our main boys so i get why we get distracted by the shipping of it all#but that scene where Esther kills and transforms him really kicked ass tbh. extremely fucked up.#oh God did i just convert myself into a Monty fan while writing this post
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Last night my father went on a drunken rampage and yelled at Jess and me for 20 minutes.
He told us it was our fault Rascal died, that we burned him to death, that we didn't really love him.
Then he came back and tried to apologize and hug me. I told him not to. To leave me alone. Then the crocodile tears went away and he got angry again! Surprise, surprise.
Anyway, does anyone have a single fucking clue of where I could get a job online? We have to get out of here before I kill myself.
#he does this sometimes and jess and i have to pretend nothing is wrong the next day.#but we just told our mom everything#so she'd know why we were acting weird#i told her that basically we hate her husband and have nothing to say to him anymore.#and she said she didn't know what to say to that except she's sorry#girl tell me that you hate him too#lol they used to fight so much#she'd told jess and me that she hated him and wanted to divorce him a dozen times in the past#like woman please god#he is useless.#i honestly wish he was dead!#Neil... baby... can you do me a favor 🙂#diaerie#delete later#suicide mention#but not really#like i will not hurt myself#not because of him i will not give him the satisfaction of killing myself#because then he would get to milk attention from everyone he knows
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hey do you think Ekko has nightmares about accidentally killing Jayce?
#yuri yelling#ekko#arcane#ekko arcane#jayce talis#i love having terrible thoughts about arcane#like WE know he's not dead but ekko doesn't know that#like i don't think ekko had that much of a plan besides throw the anomaly from one universe at the other anomaly and hope it worked#i don't think he knew what it would do let alone that the crystal would absorb viktor AND jayce#like yay you killed god! but you also killed the guy you were trying to help oops!#and who's going to be there to comfort him?#jinx is (ALLEGEDLY) dead#vi is not in the right place to be anyone's emotional support#the only other person who would understand all the magic bs is also dead (heimerdinger if that wasn't clear)#and i don't think anyone in the firelights would understand the magic/science aspect of it#maybe the accidental murder part? i can see that happening on one of the firelights' first missions#bc they seem to avoid killing in the show
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I don't know what I love more, the fact that as rook you can make a statement in NO uncertain terms that you are NOT responsible one way or the other for the theological implications of the shit you're discovering in the 'regrets of the dread wolf' memories. not my jurisdiction. quite simply none of my business. not my chantry circus not my chantry monkeys. irrelevant to the matter at hand here we'll kill that god if we get to him he can get in line. or if the best thing about it is seeing the lone little 'lucanis approves' that pops up right after choosing it. corvid with a knife about to commit deicide keeping it real and sensibly, pragmatically, wilfully agnostic with me here in this magical lighthouse today
#we do not see it. we cannot read all of a sudden.#rye having war flashbacks to watcher conferences and firmly going 'we are *not* getting derailed by the metaphysics here folks'#rare stern moderator/dad hat moment from ingellvar lol. he's Seen Some Shit in his time (debates that raged over the multiple#and not always concurrent life times of the participants involved. ain't no academic rivalry like watcher academic rivalry#because watcher academic rivalry doesn't stop even when everyone involved is dead. and the rest of us have to live with it)#I. do not think the way I'm getting this quest is how it's meant to be experienced so I'm a bit at a loss as to how to pace it out#I've been an annoying little completionist so I have ALL the statues and could just marathon it out#but that does not feel like the best way for the story and upcoming reveals to work. hm. how to do this#I'm supposed to go fail to save weisshaupt right around now I can't be having study group with all of you rn as much of a delight as it is#rye is nominally an andrastian as mainstream nevarrans generally are but as I gather is the case with many of the watchers#what he *actually* believes in is the grand necropolis itself haha#(and the philosophy of history memory death and relationship (as well as responsibility) between the past and the present#and indeed the future that it represents. we have a duty. to what has been to what is and to what will come after us. good shit)#the nevarran/mortalitasi element just makes their lack of care or respect for chantry orthodoxy *mwha* that extra bit special#the nevarran lack of concern bordering on quiet condescending disdain for official chantry doctrine and policy my beloved#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#poor harding really is living through the most relentless 'if this is the maker testing my faith he sure be testing me' gauntlet of all tim#good news: god might be real! bad news: god might not even be a real thing but more like a magical accident or vibration or something#honestly tho. if we could get full lovecraftian incomprehensible to human conception the maker -- He is a particle and a wave style --#that's the only way I'd be cool with him or them actually answering the question of his existence. that'd be kind of sick#'yes. but no. but maybe. depends on how you define god. and exist. and he. and does.' *ingellvar sets of the METAPHYSICS!! klaxon#that's a time out folks good game but easy on the jargon and navel-gazing definition of terms next round#rye and lucanis have some slightly differing views about at what exact stage of a problem murder becomes a valid solution#('well you just kill them and then I'm the one who has to deal with the next much longer part')#but they're surprisingly kind of vibing on a lot of other stuff lol. good for them <3#oc: Ellaryen Ingellvar
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“You know, Damian’s half convinced you let it happen.” Tim scoffs. “Sounds like him.” “Not like that. He’s different now, he wouldn’t say that.” “What the hell else am I supposed to think?” “You confronted Azrael alone, in civvies, after he’d already beaten you up once just for getting in his way. Is it that much of a stretch for Damian to think you might have had a death wish?” “I didn’t have a death wish.” Steph gives him a long look. "Sure."
missed posting my annual november reverse robins timsteph angst so to make up for it here's an even angstier than usual painting from this AU <3 more coming soon hopefully!!
#tim drake#reverse robins#ev sketches#tw implied suicide#(in the knowingly putting yourself in a very very dangerous situation but not consciously or personally killing yourself kind of way)#if i had the skill and the motivation this was gonna be two panels bc this is what damian discovers when he books it to the cave#he and tim bond for the first time when tim is like all of my friends and family are dead you are literally my last choice.#but can you help me with this azrael thing. do NOT tell bruce he wants to retire and i can't take that from him.#trying to shield him from this has nothing to do with my dad very recently dying because of me being a vigilante btw.#and damian's like this is a bad idea and he's very obviously unwell and injured and we do hate each other but like. yeah. fuck bruce rn.#he literally hired this insane person to be interrim batman over me so yeah sure let's team up.#and then they hang out for a while and having a common enemy is awesome and bitching about bruce to someone who gets it is kind of. great?#and damian's like wow maybe it's not too late to have a relationship with this kid (my future brother????)#so they make plans to stop azrael and fix everything without even calling bruce once and they're like wow we make a good team!#like a day before they put that plan in action azbats kills someone very publicly#and damian is like oh god tim (very mentally ill) is about to do something so stupid.#and he is! but damian is in bludhaven when he hears the news so. too late. :(#when tim gets resurrected he's blind in one eye (azrael's sword) and can't always breathe right (died from blood in lungs)#he does not get the jason lazarus pit dunk 😔#at least not right away 😈#rr tag
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regarding the difference in jason's actions towards two-face when he learns of willis's murder vs. his desire for bruce to have avenged his own death: rather than a change in morals or caring more abt bruce than willis this case shows jason's own hypocrisy. jason forgives and pities harvey bc hes a deeply empathetic person. i personally think that contrary to what he may say if bruce had died in jason's place, jason would've reacted very similarly to how he did in willis's case. after his resurrection jason latches on to the specifics of joker's continued existence, but inwardly what he's really feeling is a deep sense of his own worthlessness. he sees that bruce has moved on as though nothing happened, as though he never mattered; this triggers a deep sense of insecurity in him because he cannot so easily move on. he's stuck in the moment of his death, 15, waiting for someone to prove to him that they love him as much as he loves them. this discrepancy he feels between himself and bruce leaves him unbearably vulnerable. to assuage his own humiliation and feelings of inferiority he fixes on a problem which rapidly becomes black and white before his eyes: heres what bruce should have done if he actually loved me. id have done the same had it been him. however, as with almost anything jason says or thinks after his resurrection you have to ask yourself is he really being truthful to himself, consciously or unconsciously? when jason encounters earth-51's batman in countdown who did kill joker in response to jay's death, he seems instinctively to find this version of bruce lesser. he says to him 'we're both dead "batman." any fool could see you've been dead inside for years.' jason can't reconcile the caring person he had known with someone who would have become what that bruce did.
i think the reality of the situation is that jason would likely have reacted badly even (or perhaps especially) if bruce had killed the joker because the situation is just so fucked. bruce can't react in any way that jason isn't able to twist inwards into self-loathing. jason is simply unable to admit to himself that what he really wants is not for bruce to have killed the joker, but for his life, his death, his tenure as robin, to have been meaningful; for bruce to have unconditionally loved him as jason loved him in turn; for bruce to continue to love him, in fact to continue to need jason; more than anything though--he wishes he hadn't died, because ultimately he wishes desperately for things to be as they were -- but neither of them can ever go back to being those people.
... the tldr jason thought process is essentially -> bruce doesnt love me bruce never cared about me at all or not in any way that mattered i loved him wholly i would have done anything for him i would have died for him i would have killed for him. but LOL he would not have done that!
I love that you brought up earth 51 Batman because i think about him a lot and I think I’ve said it before how they’re both just hanging out with shuffling corpses BUT ☝️ I would attribute Jason calling this Bruce dead more to how he keeps calling Jason “Jason” and ignoring and not addressing Jason’s attempts to distinguish himself from dead-Jason. I think it’s very palpable to Jason the uncanny valley and horror of the situation because when Jason talks about dead-Jason bruce says “you” for both of them. And yet in the end bruce dives in to help when that Bruce is in trouble even tho he’s sooooo doomed. (Funny as hell for Donna and Kyle to just give Jason space to do that like in context it’s a sad moment but “we’ll just be over here”. )
I do think Jason has hypocrisy ngl but I will also but you here- I think it’s what you’re saying about the desire for proof of love but also with a combo of a change in morals. The difference could lie quality of the bad guy. I mean we get that out of Jason’s mouth, “I’m not taking about X Y and Z” but you’re right that you know, we can’t always take Jason’s word for it. But the other half of that line “doing it because he took me away from you” I think Jason thinks killing people is okay. It’s how the world works to him.
Tbh preface that I don’t think modern Jason feels this way about Bruce anymore, but the joker thing specifically was UtH Jason feeling Bruce was living in naïveté and that Jason’s death would be the thing that took him by the shoulders and forced him to confront that it’s okay to kill people sometimes. It wasn’t, because I don’t think anything is, although I see people saying he would if it were a different character and I get a little :(
Thanks for the ask, sorry I only talked about where I disagreed with you
#I’m trying to find fanfic where Bruce and Jason have a good relationship#long post#edit to say say 51 Batman was dead inside because he was killing lots of people and that’s why he was dead (inside)#and living in the past and having a fucked up fantasy and probably seeing dead Jason everywhere if we take bats track record#of how often they see dead people into account#but ☝️#and a Bruce understander can crucify me for it#I think he could forgive himself for one death. he’s done it for other people. would it tear him up? yes. but also he’d get over it#this Batman is not. like it’s crude to say he’s killing other people for self harm but I LIKE this Batman in a way that I don’t grim knight#or god forbid robin king. BECAUSE he very clearly to me doesn’t like killing people#so. he’s self harming by killing people and he’s dead inside and I have to be very humble when I say this okay. is it because#he didn’t have a tim#1 thing people get wrong for reasons I can’t understand is the post aditf Sman guest appearance#but like if you’ve read that. what’s the difference. joker shows up a year later but until that moment Bruce could’ve killed joker#and he wasn’t FINE fine but he was starting to be. so like hypothetically if joker never came back. Bruce chose to let him die.#world keeps turning he’s still Batman
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winston my quant of billions
#''😒''#corned beef#winston billions#& green of all things; drew it in purpley pink & being like whoa hey is this too much deliberately breaking out this Rare Coloring#minty fresh....been funny to be rotating the villainy of; let's say; bsol & xmas & then thinking about billions' whole other world there#& its completely different take where of all things winston is like. treated as a villain in a way its sicko My God central men aren't#(who are also quite different from iconis villains but yknow with the very fundamental differences in general what else is a surprise)#axe? prince? alive & well & billions does mean to be commenting on that like yeah sure#but winston? gotta be humiliated & violated & attacked / killed (if figuratively + just by assumption Oh He's Fiiine)#as well as basically truly dead to everyone but in a Never Existed / Spontaneously Shunned way. nobody thinks about him ever again#including when non wretched central men characters are getting these silver linings Benefits from their sabotaging a central man#not winston though maybe; the writing has forgotten him / sees no worth in bringing him up unless At His Expense; not gain#didn't get background randos telling prince or the like to go fuck himself at any point. open contempt reserved for winston there#better to have Objective Entitlement to power over / access to people & then; hey what the; be an asshole about it???#than to not just Have that entitlement & not expect it & not try to use it & be friendly & minding your own business as much or more than#any other characters like good lord what a Loser. the queerness & disability of this inferiority? just some jokes (at winston's expense)#& we will be killing him like nobody even considers for central men takedowns. those are polite & we all have Some regret it came to this#better to abuse people than. be so unepic (different from Normal white cishet 50some men who love certain media)#& on that note you're never gonna guess what's Good to do to the unepic people who bring it upon themselves....yeah haha. abuse#you're never gonna guess but power difference is a given & also good if an epic person has that power. & on that note#what can they do with it but keep unepic people in their place? what other hope do we have? winston may try to say a pun. or speak at all :#anyway while there's the absolute joys of Any Good Bastard over in a wildly different oeuvre it's like well yknow#while winston is already Ruining Things as more a Wretched Sicko Evil Asshole for seeing himself as a person & others as people#instead of himself as an inferior who has to apologize for existing & initiating any interaction vs only ever doing as he's told#unlike the best heroes who know they're superior & will use others & mess with their lives however they feel is justified; you're welcome#like well if winston's such an exceptional dick(tm) around here that he has to be introduced w/discussion / explanation around this#great let him be even bitchier & more ''difficult''....& billions would never & that's why [sorry to all the characters trapped in there]#the slightest glimpses of like & The Quasirival Weirdo Duos Are Kinda Being Cunts b/w usual parallels riawin & taylip#what comes of that? oh nothing. but as ever these are at least glimpses of a little more liveliness & range for making room for this a sec#anyway imagine getting so niche that your other kinda just as niche thing is like. less niche. but not really. wheee yayyy fr lol My Whimsy
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akanematic.mp4 (youtube link)
#I love how akane banashi discusses grief. I am pairing it with one of my fave songs about grief#akane banashi#issho arakawa#akane osaki#seb draws#it's so cool how everyone is grieving!!! each indiv chara in this vid is grieving for diff reasons diff ways and they all overlap <3#u know what i'm not done. i WILL go into this#kiroku is making space for grief by taking on the lost shiguma name. It’s he has lost miroku which is like losing a father. but he moves on#kiroku is the father figure for kisoba and rokuen that miroku couldn't be for kiroku. he literally carries kashiwaya (shiguma's art) w/him!#at the same time! kiroku DIES so soon after establishing the arakawa school and he tells kisoba 'you killed me'#this moment is the hammer in the coffin of issho's grief. he already blames himself bc it was HIS performance that resulted in#kiroku getting kicked out. a small death. and now he's told 'you killed me.' insane. Unless it was just a dream idk unclear#but again looking at how kiroku is characterized i don't think he meant to blame issho. it's very likely issho misinterpreted#just like when he misinterpreted what kiroku was trying to say when he started the arakawa school#and that brings us to the CURRENT SHIGUMA#who not only misses his mentor! but also his relationship with kisoba/issho!!!!! HE STILL CALLS HIM ANIKI IM SO SICK#I constantly think about the panel where he looks at issho with trepidation as issho says he will repent for the rest of his life.#that is when the disconnect started!!!! and it only became more extreme when he was taught shiguma's art but couldn't MASTER it!!!!#imagine how Issho felt abt shiguma wasting the opportunity he never got. and becomes even worse after shinta tries to carry shiguma's art#issho is like damn shiguma was too weak and now he brings me another weakling wtf is this!! he's out! expulsion! and ofc shiguma is mad.#but ofc WE all know what issho is TRULY mad abt is really just kiroku! and his own guilt his own grief wtfff#MY GOD.#WHICH BRINGS US TO AKANE#HER PARALLELS WITH ISSHO DRIVE ME CRAZYYYY#trying to avenge the loss of her father's rakugo!!!!!#AKane almost losing herself in her desire to copy her dad#AND!!! AUUGHGHGHGH i know folks were like HUH???? when akane was reflecting on how she could have gone on a dark path w/out shiguma#Bc didn’t she already love rakugo??? But see if we only focus on Loving the Art we become Issho.#think akane first zenza training arc and kibataraki. she loves the art but can't connect to the audience. now add crippling guilt.#Shinta Arakawa is dead and Akane accepted this. but she is still so angry. issho and akane are foils u see.
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