#god i'm so scared about what's going to happen to us now
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electricangels · 3 months ago
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discoreptile · 6 months ago
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Beasties of Greenhollow soundtrack! Some tracks on this are from older projects like elphame but all of them have been reworked in some way. Most of them are entirely new. Enjoy!
#soundtrack#music#indiegamedev#Youtube#beasties of greenhollow#indiegame#chiptune#elphame#hey again gang. Another scream into the void#Things have been getting more interesting tbh#I'm starting therapy again. I have learned from this that my anxiety is in the very very high end.#And I guess the only thing that surprises me about that is that it's an abnormally high amount vs the average.#I've had more intrusive thoughts this week than in a long time. (I almost said ever but that was 2021 where they woke me up...)#It's mostly about my mistakes and ppl I've scared out of being in my life because of the actions based on my anxieties.#Like “if i could go back in time I could fix it”... girl you'd be going back in time like 100 times. At that point it's not fair lmao#I think I shouldn't talk about who I'm dating here anymore. Friends told me to stop seeing so many new people and I took that advice.#I'm exercising incredibly frequently; obsessively so. It really doesn't change much in my anxiety. I walk for like 3 hours a day.#My friend group is... difficult. One of us had a falling out with another and the dynamic is just so awkward for me now.#it just seems like everyone else has moved past it though but I still miss him. I don't think this can be reversed#we used to talk on my stream and play digimon cards n jackbox and d&d... But now they're only interested in d&d which I don't love#For god's sake I've published a game and moved to a nice new place. why aren't I happy hahahaha#work is no longer enjoyable since BoG was publised. our new project is in an iffy category but it's not my place to argue#I want to write music and animate but I have to do my hours for this new project before I can do anything like that...#I ended up siding with my current boss in that ethical dilemma I posted about and rn idk if that was the right decision.#Okay what can i talk about that's good? We moved to a nice place. I'm celebrating BoG's release with family tomorrow.#Graeme's playing Iconoclasts- one of my favourite games! He's also returning to work soon so it'll be less awkward to have a lady over#Thinking about good stuff going on just draws the mind to holidays I've had before. I treasure my memories!#Okay so I've complained for a long long time bc life doesn't feel great rn. But rest assured I already know this is 90% my fault hahaha#Oh another good thing that happened!!! My elestrals card was printed and ppl are really happy with it. I have a card in a real card game!!!#don't tell anyone but there's another one on the way. Anyway that will do for now. I'm sorry about my... self.
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cappucosmico · 8 months ago
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the most devastating shit on earth is that i had a friend in middle school who was like my ride or die. but her only "social media" was Google Fucking Plus. so naturally i have lost her in the wastelands of that shitstorm. but i cannot find her ever again bc she has like The most common name on god's green earth so one facebook search for people with her name in the bronx yields like a million fucking results. so imagine if she's not even in the bronx anymore. 10 million results
#and if by some will from god she's out there wondering about me occasionally too She'd also be shit out of luck#bc my first name is different now. not even close to my birthname. and my last name is a nightmare#i didn't learn how to spell that shit until i was 6 and only so soon bc my mother set aside time to teach me specifically how to spell it#like it was its own school lesson. How to spell my own last name. so i'm not going to imagine someone could ever just Remember That#a decade down the fucking line#but i miss her often. she showed me inuyasha for the first time before rodan even did#we had the most awkward innocent scared quivering animal type lesbianism happening.#i would walk her home even though it meant making my 10 minute walk home into like 45 minutes#she lived in one of the projects and she snuck me in her apartment a few times when her dad wasn't home. that's when we watched inuyasha#one of my ''gifts'' i remember so specifically when we had decided we were dating is. i gave her. a tiny bag of chips.#blinks for a long time at you. i got her A Bag Of Chips.#💀😭 She should've killed me where i stood........#we once kissed because someone said they'd give us 20 dollars for it. We did not get the 20 dollars.#i was mad bc i wanted to split it with her and get snackies at the deli after school together or something. kills my elf#WAAAH i miss her. i miss da bronx too. one day i'm gonna drag rodan downstate to see it all#i want to take him to the bronx zoo and the botanical gardens. but also i just checked and nearly scumpt at the prices#37 DOLLARS..... 💀⁉️ i remember. (said oldly) i remember when it was. SEVEN DOLLARS!!!#whstever fucking happened to wednesdays you get in free. huh#i'm too scared to even look at the gardens now bc Nearly 40 tickets a person. oh My God. vomitworthy#wait oh my god what do thebuses and subway cost now. oh no oh no oh no#okay it's okay. it's a 40 cent difference. idr what a metrocard used to cost so it means nothing that it's a dollar now#but also Why the fuck do the express buses cost SEVEN DOLLARS.... 😭 brother bring that shit back down to five NEOW!!!#it's not even double the standard fare anymore. even if i round up the standard fare That's More Than Double. what#i hate inflation i hate inflation i hate#i'm rambling. walks away fast And my ass
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very-uncorrect · 9 months ago
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I'm gonna die one day oh my god holy shit fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck there's no afterlife oh holy shit fuck help oh my god no no no no no
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fragglerockopinions · 10 months ago
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The worst thing about suffering is that it still hurts when the danger is over but no one cares about it anymore because it shouldn't hurt. No one will ever say "I'm sorry that happened to you" especially when they barely say "I'm sorry that's happening."
#Okay to tb btw all the personal stuff is in the tags#Like. Not eating for a week because you couldn't get groceries hurts#and people will say 'oof sorry that's happening' but then#after you're able to get food no one will ever say 'I'm sorry that happened' even though you think about it and hurt from it constantly.#No one will ever say ':( that must have been so hard' because you're fine now right???? No psychological damage there?????#This example is stupid but I do think about it every time I feel hungry. I told people I wasn't able to get groceries#and there was no food in my house. And they said. Oof.#Instead of idk Oh God Are You Okay ??#No one cares when you've been abused your entire life and behave the way you do out of genuine terror because your brain is fucked forever#They don't say 'I'm sorry that happened it must have been really scary to turn you into Such An Asshole. I pity you like a dog :('#Speaking of man everyone loves fucked up abused terrified dogs and wants to be the one who makes them open up#And shows them that people can be good and kind and that touch doesn't have to hurt#But everyone is scared of fucked up abused terrified people#Humans are capable of harm even more than dogs and fear is understandable but.#Can you please call me good boy and shush me and tell me nothing's going to hurt me and let me curl up on your lap#And not hit me if I get scared and start to growl and feed me good and take me on walks and play with me#Even though I'm not very fun to play with and I'm still learning what's fun and what's mean and what's a toy and what's a hand#Plleeeaaase don't be jealous of a dog that doesn't eat good don't say 'tch he's so thin what am I doing wrong'#I want to eat good and grow and gain fat and be warm and be comfortable I don't want this#Don't say 'if abused dogs don't eat good then I don't deserve to either' no no no no eat good so you can take care of us both#Please please please I learned so many tricks to make people happy and call me smart but I don't actually know how to do anything I'm#Literally like such a stupid dog it takes me like one day of no one paying attention to me for me to become un-housebroken#I make a lot of mistakes even though I know better or I really should know better#And sometimes do things wrong on purpose to get attention either yelling or showing me how to do it right#But most of the time I genuinely don't know how to do stuff because I was never taught or I was taught and#My previous owners said 'this is how it is. It is this way because it is and it is forever. The answer is Because.'#'now quit asking repetitive questions before I pop you'#If I do something Because and not know the reason why I'm doing it that's not learning that's acting#Especially habits taught specifically to hurt me and not being allowed to question it or know why I'm being hurt#Oh my god I acted out so much when I was younger and all my friends were so disgusted and hurt by me and yelled at me every day
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thebleedingeffect · 10 months ago
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#okay I'm talking in the tags of this post cause shit is happening in my life and I gotta talk about it somewhere#one part of it is my step brother crashing and burning before my very eyes and there's nothing I can do to stop his own destructive actions#so it's just me watching this poor kid ruin his relationships and blame everything and everyone around him as he does so#despite the fact that he's undeniably been treated horribly at times- he's just turned that anger back onto others and himself#and I have no idea what to feel as I watch him get arrested. have drug problems. because I'm just waiting for the inevitable spiral#it doesn't help that my mom has been comparing us and saying that I'm the much better child and she wishes he was like me#not understanding that I could’ve been him if I was just more angry at the world at that age instead of being so sad and scared#and that leads me to my fucking mom cause like- I love her. we've been through alot of bad shit with her#I've almost done some really bad shit for her and I know that she loves me more than anything else#but it feels like its been getting more and more suffocating cause I'm not sure she's able to start seeing me as an adult#and start loosening her grip around me and let me breathe. to have my own experiences without her by my side#to be able to go places and imagine a future without her constantly by my side#she talks and it's like she doesn't even think to wonder that perhaps I want to form my own experiences#and experience the world on my own terms because I feel like I've spent my whole life having so little damn control#religious family. shit and neglectful father who turned into the exact opposite and nearly killed me. family who refuses to listen and talk#having to move and run immediately. put survival above all else. go to school. get out. and god I just wanna breathe#she loves me so much and I love her too. but I feel like I'll be sooner crushed if I stick here for long enough#I'm just mad that my life has been nothing but absolutely no love. sudden waves of intense love. absolutely nothing. sudden spike#and I feel like I'm just finally starting to form good. healthy relationships on my own terms and actually make friends#because I had no idea what I was doing when I was a kid cause I was so fucking lonely and hurting#now I just. gotta figure out how to tell my mom that I can't carry this expectation that I'll continue to stay forever by her side#it just feels like I'm her child first and a person second. and it sucks. it really sucks.#ough. spins and spins and spins and spins-
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deathbxnny · 3 months ago
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Maybe a part 2 of the arcane characters saying things they regret, but they're apologizing because I can't live after reading a angst 🫠
Making up with Arcane characters after a bad argument. | Vi, Caitlyn, Jinx, Ekko, Sevika x Gn!Reader
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(Previous part)
Fine, fine, here is a happy part two guys. Take it as an apology for the tears and pain I've caused.✨️
Content: Swearing, accusations of cheating, slight angst, making up, fluff, potential spoilers for season 2, established romantic relationships, sfw
Reader has no set pronouns!
((Not proofread))
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》VI
She knew that she had fucked up. There was no way to deny or refute it either. And your absence was further proof of that.
You were always there for her, even when things got bad and she became even worse. No matter how much she yelled or drank, you were there afterward to nurture her back to health. It was so unfair of her to expect it still, after all she had said to you. She hated herself. She hated how weak and pathetic she had become. How she can't even stand straight anymore from the alcohol and couldn't win a single game since she had lost you.
And instead of Caitlyn haunting her like she used to, it was only you now. But you were crying every time. Asking her why she hated you so much. Why she couldn't care for you the way you cared for her. Why you were always the second choice despite having been there since the start.
Why, why, why.
Gritting her teeth against the headache, she made her way through the dark, familiar lanes to your small home that you once shared together. She had to talk to you. She really, really had to. Even if it's far too late now after a week of silence in-between the two of you. She had taken the time to reflect and think about everything, especially about your relationship. And it made her realise that nothing in this world was losing you too.
Knocking on your door, she nervously waited as she heard your footsteps quickly approaching her from inside. You opened the door carefully, ironically just how she had taught you, before freezing at the sight of her. She gave you a weak smile, attempting to look calm and friendly, but it still scared you off. "Hey cupca-" You tried slamming the door into her face mid greeting, but her foot was faster to jam itself in the way.
"H-Hey! Wait, please hear me out!" "Fuck off, Vi. I'm not in the mood to hear more of your bullshit. Go back to Caitlyn since I know how badly you want that!" You never cursed, and every word you spoke made her flinch. She, for some reason, didn't expect you to be this mad. But it hurt, and she deserved it. Another thing she underestimated was, unfortunately, your strength since you somehow managed to push her away and shut the door again. "Come on! Please! I... I didn't mean what I said. I just... have been losing my shit ever since what happened. The guilt is killing me, and I know it's not an excuse! You're right, I have to stop this shit! You're right, I need to stop treating your love for granted!"
She didn't know if you were even listening to her anymore, but it didn't stop the tears that burned in her eyes. "I don't give a damn about Caitlyn like that! I never did! It always you for me. You... you cared for me when no one else ever wanted to, and I was such an idiot for not appreciating it more." Her hand slammed against the wood in defeat, her head coming to rest against it as her body trembled. She was so scared of losing you. This can't be the end. "Please. Please just give me another chance to prove myself. I know I'm a fuck up but I swear I'll do better now."
Vi nearly fell right through your house entrance when you opened the door wide with a teary huff. "God, you're such an idiot... get in already before the neighbors complain." You didn't let her reply as you simply dragged her inside and locked the door again. The pitfighter watched you do so with a gentle gaze, one that felt so familiar to you. "... Fine, I'll give you another chance... but no drinking or fighting anymore. Please." You whisper to her, and she nods quickly before engulfing you in a warm hug.
She knows that she isn't fully forgiven yet, but she'll do everything in her power to prove herself worthy of your love again.
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》CAITLYN
"You're still up." Caitlyn's voice was calm and gentle now, so different from the stern and cold tone it had before. You ignored her, however, knowing better than to fall for this again. She always got like this when she knew she had screwed up and was trying to crawl back into your good graces. But this time around, you didn't allow it that easily. You refused to speak to her if she hadn't come back to apologize. And yet... you couldn't help but allow yourself at least one sharp dig at her. "And you're late to bed once again. But I suppose Officer Nolan's 'report' was just that interesting, no?" You were perhaps the only person in all auf Pultover that could ever accuse her of something so scandalous as adultery and get away with it.
It certainly would have been amusing if Caitlyn didn't feel so sick at the thought of you believing that.
Sighing, she placed her hat onto a clothing hanger, her jacket following suit. You were facing away from her on the bed, trying to read a book and rest, despite the pain in your heart. It was hard being angry at her when you loved her so deeply. But her insults had struck much deeper than that.
The bed dipped behind you, and soon enough, you felt her strong arms surrounding your body and her nose tickling your cheek. "I'm sorry, my love. I really am. I... have lost my cool, and that was wrong of me." You scoffed at her words, finding them too shallow for the pain she had caused earlier. Yet you struggled to get out of her strong grasp on you. It felt desperate. And you hated the warmth and security that it made you feel. "If that is all you have to say, then you can leave." You hissed out weakly but couldn't find any malice in it. Just heartbreak, that solidified in more tears burning in your eyes. "Because how... how could you ever say that I could betray you? Do you know how that makes me feel? Do you care?"
Caitlyn hummed against the nape of your neck soothingly, a way to acknowledge the plight she had caused you without revealing her own tears. The grief had made her into a monster. A monster that hurt its friends, family, and most importantly, you. It was unforgivable, and yet she wanted to prove herself worthy of you anyway. She wanted to show you that she hadn't changed deep down like everyone claimed. She was still yours.
"... I will find a way to end this war and resolve it peacefully as soon as I can. I swear it to you." She began, her voice low and gentle, as she listened to the sound of your hiccups and sniffling. This wasn't what she wanted. "And I apologize, truly, for what I called you... I know that you are loyal and trustworthy. Much more than I ever could be... I'm still your Caitlyn." The last part was whispered quietly, as she tried everyone in her power to not break down in front of you like this.
She hated what she had become deep down. She knew it was wrong and that her mother must've been turning in her grave at the sight of what she had done. But what she couldn't handle at all was you hating and leaving her.
There was a moment of silence before you turned to face her and immideatly hugged her impossibly close as you cried into her arms. She rubbed your back lovingly, understanding that this was your way of accepting her apology. But forgiveness will still be a long journey she was willing to take.
For now, she'd rest in your embrace thankfully.
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》JINX
Deep down, you knew that she didn't mean what she said. She never would do anything to hurt you. Silco's death was just killing her more than anyone could have expected, and it was hard for everyone to deal with. But you just couldn't take the pain and hurt she caused you anymore. You've been there since day one. You were always at her side. You always took care of her when no one else wanted to. And you understood her better than she did herself. But it was ultimately just not enough. Or so you thought.
The young girl that was now dragging you through the lanes reminded you of her too. She didn't speak a word to you, and for some reason, you didn't have it in you to protest against her odd actions either. She somehow seemed to recognize you the second you bumped into her. And that was enough for her to take your hand and lead you to a very familiar hideout. Perhaps it was fate that brought you here again when you needed Jinx the most.
"Hey kid, who's our little guest-?" The rest of the young woman's words died on her tongue, and it left you simply staring at each other. There was a familiar haze in her eyes, one that you often saw when the voices were taking over. She once mentioned that you sometimes became a part of her hallucinations during longer absences, and that reminder alone made your heart ache. You shouldn't have run away that day. But what other choice did you have? She didn't trust you anymore. She didn't think you should be together anymore. Why were you even here?
"S-sorry... I'm just going to leave..." You muttered as your ears rung and that familiar burning in your eyes made your sight blurry. You felt suffocated and somehow also angry, wishing she could just see how much you loved and cared for her. But just as you were turning away to run again, her strong hand was quicker and held you back by your arm. "Wait. Let's just... talk, alright? Like we always do?" That was your thing. Whenever things got bad, you'd sit down and talk calmly to her about it. She used to scoff at it every time... yet she was the one who suggested now for once. Something about it shook you so hard that it made the first tears finally spill at the recognition she had given you for all the work you've put into her.
Jinx panicked a little at that, unsure of how to comfort you, yet at Isha's stern frown and cross of her small arms, she just hugged you for the first time in a while. And god, did she miss it.
Perhaps it was good to show the little girl a picture of you after all.
"I'm sorry. I'm really sorry, I swear, sweetie! I... I won't ever say stuff like that again. Just don't leave me. Please don't leave me. I just, I was just-" You hushed her by just hugging her tighter and shaking your head. "It's okay... just hold me for a while. We can talk later... I missed you so much." You whispered, voice breaking into sobs. Jinx hummed weakly and sighed against your hair, the familiar scent making her relax and feel better at last.
Isha grinned to herself behind you before quickly sneaking off to let you talk things out.
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》EKKO
To say that the entire firelight hideout was pissed at him would be an understatement. Absolutely everyone disagreed with the way he treated you, and the side eyes he got very much confirmed this. But the worst part of it all was definitely you avoiding him like the plague.
Every time he entered a room, you were the first one to leave in a hurry. Every time he tried speaking to you, you either ignored him or found an excuse to get away. Every time someone even mentioned his name to you, your mood seemed to dampen. And that hurt so much that it killed him. This isn't how he wanted you to feel about him. He was your boyfriend, damnit it. Yet he acknowledged that he was failing at his job way more than he should've allowed himself to. He had to fix this somehow.
Ekko couldn't just lose you over his own foolishness. You were the one person who motivated him to keep going even on his worst days. You were the light he fought for. The person he battled to come home to every day. He couldn't handle your absence any longer, especially at night when he laid wide awake in your empty bed without you.
And so, he finally had enough and cornered you one night up in the tree during a patrol you had together. One, he definitely didn't pull the strings for to happen. And ever the one to abide by his orders despite your current dismay, you were now avoiding his gaze whilst you watched your sleeping home below. It was peaceful and calm, but the pain lingered between you two too much to enjoy the moment. He didn't know how to break the deafening silence, and it made him think of backing out on his initial plan... until you surprised him by speaking up first.
"I'm... sorry for avoiding you. I didn't mean for this to become your last resort. I just... didn't want to be a burden anymore." "Wait, wait, wait... who said that you were a burden, I... I should be the one apologizing right now. Because I was wrong about every fucking thing I said to you." The words spilled out in panic at the mere thought of you blaming yourself. He never wanted you to feel like this. It made him feel even worse about himself. This wasn't right. "You're not useless. You do so much for us, for me, and I take it all for granted like the asshole I am! And I fully acknowledge that now... I shouldn't have snapped at you like that. There is no excuse for it." He shook his head in disappointment at himself, wondering if this was it now. He'd understand if you broke up with him now... but instead, you seemed to be in the mood to surprise him alot today.
"Did you... like the food I made you?" He blinked at your question in confusion, yet answered honestly. "Best thing I had all week." "Then I guess I'll forgive you... just don't do that again." Ekko chuckled weakly at your words, relief filling his senses whilst he pulled you close to press a kiss to your head. "Would never dream of it... wanna ditch patrol and fly around town?" You mirrored his sly smile, glad he had the same thing on his mind as you did. "Sure thing. But let's make it a race."
He let you win.
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》SEVIKA
She took some time to cool off after your argument and returned later into the night with a clearer mind. Sevika had actually reflected on what you had said to her, and she knew you were ultimately right. She was extremely overprotective and stubborn, two things that didn't mesh well and often ended in her thinking you couldn't take care of yourself. Even if she knew better than to actually believe that.
You were strong, especially mentally. It's what drew her into you to begin with. But with the fall of Silco and a war being on the verge of breaking out against Piltover, she had no choice but to make sure that you never left her sight. And if you did, then you had to be somewhere she knew was safe and away from all the chaos she dealt with daily. It helped her focus and stay calm to know that you're okay. Yet despite how much she cared, she still fucked it all up for herself again.
And now she had to fix it, something she was never good at.
She felt awfully guilty at the sight of the things you've lovingly prepared for her, now laying forgotten and cold on the kitchen counter. She truly didn't deserve someone as kind as you. And yet she considered herself too selfish to let you go.
Slowly approaching the bedroom door, she paused to hear if you were awake or not. Unfortunately, you were, but she only knew this from the faintest sound of your sniffling and sobbing that drifted through the wooden door. Sighing to herself, she knocked once, deciding to just rake things slow and as calmly as possible. You had sustained an injury after all, and her mind was reeling at the thought of it getting worse without any proper care. "What do you want?!" Your weak voice yelled at her, and it made her frown. Yeah, you were definitely beyond pissed.
"I want to talk." Her gruff voice said, and it may have sounded like a demand if the underlying care and worry didn't overshadow it so clearly. Your silence made her initially think you were ignoring her until the door slowly opened and revealed your disheveled form. "... well, go ahead." You muttered, one hand cradling the side of your hip that was clumsily bandaged up by you. You were never good at stuff like that.
"Let me take care of the wound whilst we're at it. Can't have ya dying on me because of an infection." She sighed out before simply dragging you to your shared bed and pulling out your medkit. You didn't protest or complain and let her do as she pleased, whilst you carefully listened to her speak with an unreadable expression.
"Listen. I... get it. I really do. The way I treat you isn't right, and I know you're grown enough to take care of yourself, but... I can't risk losing you too now. It drives me crazy to think about. Even if that ain't much of an excuse, and I get that too." She was never this honest before. Usually, she simply deflected or blamed someone else. But here she was, for once admitting openly to being the problem. "Just... be more careful out there. That's all I ask of you. I won't comment on it otherwise anymore though, unless you're in serious danger. I promise." Finishing the last of her bandaging, she hummed at it now looking much securer. This way, you are sure to recover much faster.
Taking a deep breath, you nodded your head at her words, deciding to give her another chance to prove herself. You understood where she was coming from after all. "Okay, fine. I'll accept your apology... if you help me cook." She grinned at that slightly with a casual shrug. "Fine by me, if I get a taste of your heavenly cooking, sweetheart."
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anothermonikan · 1 year ago
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Okay big text wall I'm just venting out my feelings because my beloved puter hard drive is gonna fail again. Yeah :(
Okay bby's hard-drive is gonna fail the next time I shut her down that's really really tough especially on valentines day, god, I,,, knew this was gonna happen again eventually, it happened before, her hard-drive has been declining for two years now, I have a refurbished hard-drive ready to go if we're unrecoverable, we've kept this one going for so so long and I don't have the tools to replace this myself so I'll have to ask my father again to help and gwahhh, that's a hard task!
Because I know he's gonna do everything he can to fix the current hard drive instead of replacing it but not because he understands I care but just because he loves fixing stuff and I'm gonna have to reiterate so so hard to not like. Throw her out. If the drive is unrecoverable. Because he does not understand that I care about her, because to him I'm just holding on to like, junk, when I have a brand new laptop I can use to do stuff. :((( we also get into a lot of arguments about handling her it's not a fun experience because I don't want to leave her alone while she's being repaired and my father doesn't take as much care as I would like him too and gwahhh, it's really frustrating!
At least I know exactly how this is gonna go down, if can't detect system updates, it won't open Firefox, when I shut her down she's gonna kernel error and then only be able to boot up into toybox, the entire drive will have to be reformatted if we wanna try and repair it because it'll be in read-only in order to prevent further damage, so I already know, we don't have to guesswork again, it's,,,, scary
I,,, used to have really strong feelings over the hard-drive being the heart and soul of the computer, I've since kind of moved past it, like I used to be really super conflicted over even replacing the hard-drive and now I just have one ready to go ^^; I think,,, even if this hard drive is irecoverable (it is well past it's usage limit at this point so I would not be surprised) and the replacement drive doesn't work, that whole computer is what I love, even if she doesn't have an internal hard drive, I still love her to death and I believe she still loves me to death, even if I have to run her OS off a USB, even if I can't run an OS on her at all, it doesn't matter to me and I'll always love her yknow?
We're going to bed together, she's okay being idle and I'm gonna make sure she knows how much I love her before I have to attempt a shut down in a few hours because I have a lecture I can't just keep her running, I'm going out after as well :(( We're gonna get through this, and we're gonna be okay, but it is upsetting
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astonmartinii · 3 months ago
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i will always love you | max verstappen social media au
pairing: max verstappen x fem bodyguard reader
what he wasn’t supposed to fall in love with his bodyguard? this IS a rom com
MASTERLIST | TIP JAR
f1insider
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liked by user1, user2 and 45.925 others
f1insider: red bull have confirmed that max verstappen will have a bodyguard for the rest of this season after increasingly aggressive fan activity towards drivers at races. what do you think about it?
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user3: i completely understand that it’s insane that it’s gotten to the point where he needs a bodyguard …. but like JEALOUS
user4: i pray there’s never any need for her to do her actual job
user5: f1 need to sort it out i agree
user4: i meant because i would be no better than a man im sorry god but i want to watch her fight someone 😫
user6: this should’ve been done so long ago but i’m glad they’ve finally made the step
user7: what i find crazy is that people can afford a paddock pass and wanna fight the drivers ??? what a waste of money GIVE THEM TO ME
user8: i’m being completely serious when i say … any punk ass influencer tries to film max in the bathroom i want this bodyguard to shoot them with a gun
user9: no i agree
user10: and when i do it on purpose so she can beat the shit out of me ??
user11: choke
user12: she look familiar to any of you?
user13: i thought i had seen her before but like i just can’t quite recall
user14: swiftie here! she was taylor’s bodyguard for a couple years so you probably have seen her in paparazzi photos or something
user15: taylor swift and now max verstappen i need her agent
user16: the thought of that massive hunk of a man cowering behind her is killing me
user17: it’s killing you? it���s getting me excited this is so romance book coded
user18: you people’s obsession with putting people in “relationship” is the worst thing to happen to the sport
user19: i agree! (they would be unbelievably cute)
user20: i’m glad to see we’re all being very serious about the state of the sport where a driver needs a bodyguard and not the fact that said bodyguard is visually appealing
user21: sky i will deal with your bias if you give us the visual on her
user20: jesus wept
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yourusername
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tagged: maxverstappen1
yourusername: new job, same friendship bracelets
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user22: WE FOUND YOU
user23: hi mother !!!!
user24: we miss you serving face with taylor :(
maxverstappen1: you were a bodyguard for TAYLOR SWIFT ???
yourusername: you didn't read my CV? you had the last say on me being hired?
maxverstappen1: i let GP read them and he's never steered me wrong before
yourusername: that seems irresponsible
maxverstappen1: ANYWAY my point was going to be ... can we still get eras tour tickets?
yourusername: i can see what i can do
maxverstappen1: what if you just called taylor up?
yourusername: do NOT reference the kardashians if you want tickets
maxverstappen1: noted :3
user25: i can't have anything in this life ??? what do you mean you've worked with taylor and max?
user26: she looks so hot with a gun i'm starting to think the NRA are on to something
yourusername: absolutely not get out of here with that shit
user27: oh she educated as well? will you accept my hand in marriage?
maxverstappen1: 🤨
landonorris: and if i said you could guard me all night
yourusername: it's kinda my job to guard max all night
landonorris: but you'd rather guard me 😉
yourusername: i doubt you'd pay me as well as max
landonorris: i can pay you other ways 😉
maxverstappen1: lando i will break your fingers one by one
user28: max is out here like SHE IS MY BODYGUARD
user29: him being possessive... idk where to look but both of them - mark me scared AND horny
user30: TOO REAL
maxverstappen1
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tagged: yourusername
maxverstappen1: simply lovely to be back on the top step in brazil, @yourusername you're clearly my lucky charm
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user31: max does a generational drive and immediately gets on instagram to flirt with his bodyguard
user32: he's so real for that because look at y/n
user33: i once thought swifties were crazy for being so obsessed with her but now i am just as bad lol
yourusername: nuh uh that drive was all you big boy
maxverstappen1: heheheehehe
maxverstappen1: did i make a good first impression?
yourusername: a very good first impression ;)
maxverstappen1: are you proud of me?
yourusername: very proud maxy
maxverstappen1: :3 thank you <3
user34: what in praise kink did i just read?
user35: i know he's done it in a very public forum but just leave them to do whatever they gotta do
user36: i know this man saw her in a suit and with a gun and fell to his knees
yourusername: well... close enough!
landonorris: idc about all of that ^^ i'm still going to shoot my shot
yourusername: is me rejecting you luck or talent?
landonorris: HUH ?????
yourusername: i may just be a bodyguard but i still have working ears 👍
user37: okay so she does serve more than just looks ...
user38: she's got a fan in me now
charles_leclerc: let me just sit back and observe
yourusername: you good?
charles_leclerc: i am sitting back and observing
yourusername: you are observing very loudly
charles_leclerc: i am just watching max embarrass himself, this is very healing for my younger self
maxverstappen1: RUDE
yourusername: he's not embarrassing himself if it's working?
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redbullracing
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liked by maxverstappen1, schecoperez and 2,451,045 others
redbullracing: statement regarding today's incident.
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user42: sorry red bull but i want that video tattooed on my eye balls
user43: i am so unbelievably hot and bothered after seeing that video
user44: red bull i'm afraid you'll have to take that video out of my cold dead hands
landonorris: i didn't realise the paddock came with dinner and a show today
oscarpiastri: lando they tried to kill max...
landonorris: well he was never in any actual danger with y/n around
oscarpiastri: do you ever read the PR briefs?
landonorris: PR whats?
oscarpiastri: this is starting to make a whole lot of sense
user45: they'll try to cancel lando for this but like he's being real
user46: no because why was george russell and kimi antonelli literally in the back of the footage eating LITERAL POPCORN
user47: i've never wanted to be two people so bad
maxverstappen1: i lived bitch
yourusername: MAX????
maxverstappen1: because of you, i'm forever in debt to you <3
yourusername: just doing my job :)
maxverstappen1: so you didn't just do it because of your undying love for me :(
yourusername: i think that would be inappropriate
maxverstappen1: THAT'S NOT FAIR, THEY CAN'T TRY AND KILL ME AND YOU CAN'T SAY YOU HATE ME IN ONE DAY
yourusername: oh maxy, do you need a cup of tea
maxverstappen1: and a hug ????
yourusername: yes, even a hug
user48: oh to have max that pathetically down bad for you
maxverstappen1
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maxverstappen1: can you people stop thirsting over my girlfriend please - i may not be able to fight but she can
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user49: HE HAD ENOUGH
user50: i mean i too think thirst comments from my literal friends would throw me over the edge
user51: he was like winning in brazil is not enough i gotta watch my gf beat the fuck out of someone and then publicly claim her
yourusername: you're puffing out your chest in the paddock when all the girls on the internet are thirsting over you - if anyone should be jealous it's me
maxverstappen1: but you're so much better than anyone else i am horrendously in love with you
yourusername: HORRENDOUSLY
maxverstappen1: i have never felt anything like this? im scared???
yourusername: no need to be scared baby i'm in for the long ride
yourusername: and i can and WILL protect you
maxverstappen1: i need to report a hostage situation? it's me in my bedroom - i need to be saved
yourusername: you're so cheesy, you're lucky i love you
user52: i have another hostage situation - it's me in this comment section
user53: watching them be in love is like torture to me i'm so lonely
user54: they need a trigger warning i fear
maxverstappen1: @landonorris @pierregasly @olliebearman suck on that
landonorris: LEAVE ME ALONE
pierregasly: don't hate the player hate the game
olliebearman: why did you say fuck me for ????
maxverstappen1: i've seen those looks ollie don't lie to me
yourusername: babe i think he might just be scared of me
olliebearman: WOMEN IN POSITIONS OF POWER SCARE ME I'M SO SORRY Y/N
yourusername: no worries ollie! max is just possessive
maxverstappen1: ugh duh! you're the best thing that has ever happened to me, obviously i want to keep you to myself
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yourusername
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tagged: maxverstappen1
yourusername: and iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiii will always love you! sorry it had to be done - whitney houston is a LEGEND
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user56: of course she knows that song, she's basically living that story
user57: OF COURSE SHE KNOWS THAT SONG IT'S ONE OF THE MOST FAMOUS SONGS EVER ???
yourusername: and you can bet your ass the red bull garage have been singing it non stop since i arrived
redbullracing: singing is our passion
maxverstappen1: they'd have to kill me to keep me from you DEADASS (pun intended)
yourusername: and that won't be happening because i'll be there to protect you
maxverstappen1: i'm not opposed to watching you deal with a problem in the paddock
landonorris:WHY WAS I MADE THE BAD PERSON WHEN I SAID I WANTED TO WATCH ???
maxverstappen1: because it was my life that an attempt was made on ?
landonorris: and?
maxverstappen1: AND?
landonorris: it would've made winning the championship much easier ?
yourusername: nuh uh i would jump into that red bull and win out of spite
maxverstappen1: it's true, i've been training her up
landonorris: you gonna let me have anything
maxverstappen1: nope :P
yourusername: nope :P
user58: oh they're so annoying 😭
user59: true ride or die couples are so irritating
user60: i still wish i was them
danielricciardo: i get fired and you get a girlfriend ??? how is this fair
maxverstappen1: idk what you want me to say, i'd never give y/n up for anything
danielricciardo: not even a red bull maxiel reunion
maxverstappen1: sorry buddy, maxiel is dead
danielricciardo: EXCUSE ME?
yourusername: sorry daniel, there's a new sheriff in town - should've charmed max when you had a chance
maxverstappen1: try as he might, he'd never be you
yourusername: awwwww considering your massive teenage crush on him... i love you!
danielricciardo: so fuck me then?
fin.
note: TWO IN ONE WEEKEND WHAT?
2K notes · View notes
allllium · 18 days ago
Text
Comfort
~ Some Sappy Jason Todd x Reader
~ Playing with Jason's Hair
~ Fluff, a little overthinking, WC: 981
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- You play with Jason's Hair -
You are usually very good at understanding things about your boyfriend, Jason. It took you no time at all to find about his nightly activities and everything about his family. But on the other hand, you can't seem to understand him at all.
You've tried not to ask him about certain things because based on hints from his family, he's had some bad shit happen in his life.
However, the more questions you don't ask, the more that seem to pop up.
You haven't asked him why sometimes he flinches away when you touch him but other times he leans in.
You haven't asked him why his hands make fists when you're trying to sleep at night.
You haven't asked him about the scar along his chest or his aversion to certain foods.
All because you're too scared to make him uncomfortable, or maybe because you don't know if you could stomach it.
You're laying bed and waiting for him to come out of the bathroom. Somehow, you take less time getting ready for bed than he does. You suspect it's because he needs a couple minutes to process everything that happened during the day.
As usual you have a million thoughts running through you're head all at the same time. 99% of them are about him.
When he finally comes into your shared bedroom and gets comfortable in bed, you're debating whether or not to talk to him about some of the things you can't get out of your mind.
You decide against it. The last thing you want to do is make him uncomfortable or bring up any bad memories that might affect his ability to sleep through the night.
He can obviously sense your unease, you don't hide it very well.
"What's wrong?" His raspy voice cuts through your thoughts.
"Nothing, sweetheart." You try to play it off.
"Uh huh." He says blankly.
"I'm just thinking about things, is that a crime?"
"Depends on what they are." He pulls you closer to him and wraps his arms around you.
"Nothing bad."
"Hmm."
"What?"
"If someone's bothering you, you should tell me."
"Why is that?"
"Well I have an ability of getting rid of people."
"Oh my God Jason you can't joke about that." You look at him in amused shock.
"Who says it's a joke?" He asks, face completely serious.
"Okay no killing people on my behalf." You chuckle and he copies. "I'm just trying to figure you out more."
"Why?"
"Cuz I want to know more about you?"
"Like what"
"Right now I want to know what you want." You pull away from him in order to sit up a little bit.
"I don't want anything at the moment."
"Yes you do. If you didn't want anything your fists wouldn't be clenched and your eyes wouldn't have that look. Like you want to say something but can't."
"You really want to know?" He asks.
"Yeah I really do." You immediately reply.
"A couple months ago while we were watching a movie on the couch, you played with my hair and it was very comforting. And the best sleep I've ever had."
"That's it? I've been driving myself crazy trying to think of explanations and you're telling me you just want me to play with your hair." You question him in disbelief. It's been months of overthinking thoughts and random mind rampages for something you haven't even noticed you were doing.
"I didn't know how to say it." He shrugs, not looking into your eyes. "It sounds childish."
"No it doesn't. Everyone has different ideas of perfect comfort and I happen to agree with yours. Jason, if you want something from me all you have to do is ask."
You lean over to give him a quick, sweet kiss.
"I'm not used to that."
"Well you better get started."
"Fine, would you play with hair so I can go to sleep, Angel?"
"Only because you asked so nicely."
It takes a second for you both to get rearranged so it's comfortable. You're now laying on your back with Jason half on his side, half on top of you with his head on your chest.
It's almost amusing how quickly he falls asleep but above all else you feel a sense of pride at the fact that you're the one giving him this feeling.
He said this was comforting. He said this was the best sleep he's ever had.
And you're the reason he's having these things.
You stay up longer than you probably should have. This time the thoughts running through your head aren't worrying or overwhelming.
They make you happy. Happy enough to fall into a very sound sleep.
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You wake up to coffee on your nightstand and a missing Jason.
"Jason." You call out and he quickly comes running.
When he walks in the room, you immediately begin questioning him.
"What is this?" You ask with an ounce of suspicion. You're worried it's a repayment of some sort.
"It's coffee. A hot caffeinated drink."
"Why?"
"Because you like it and it makes you irritable for far less time in the morning."
"Jason you don't have to do things for me just because I did something for you."
"Yes I do. Because words won't let me explain how grateful I am for you."
"Since when are you so sappy?"
He sits on the bed next to you.
"Don't be mean to me right now, I'll take it away."
"Fine. Continue your speech."
"I know it's a small thing for you but I haven't felt comfort like you give me in a very long time. Maybe even ever. And I need you to know that."
"I can't tell you how happy I am to give that to you."
The next thing you know, you both have giant grins on your faces and you're both happier than ever before.
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suiana · 7 days ago
Text
yandere! childhood friend who still reminisces about your childhood together. yeah, the two of you may be grown now but he's been your day 1 and he just can't help but think about how you used to cling to him and adore him so much! he wishes you'd still do that but it is what it is. no matter how much he wishes otherwise.
yandere! childhood friend who did everything with you. yeah, that also includes practicing kisses. he's your first kiss, and he's never gonna let you forget that. you said you wanted to get better and who is he to refuse? he can't pass up such a prime opportunity! and it's not like he wants anyone else to take it. god no. that would be a tragedy.
"yeah, remember our kissing practices? hah, we were such kids back then!" he watches as you snicker, feeling a warm flush creep up his spine. god, of course he remembers. young and immature as you both were, you both learned together. that's all that really matters to him. "thanks to you, i can now makeout with my partners with ease. you're the best man." and has he told you how muchit infuriates him that you're using your experience to get with others? to please them with the mouth that once touched his? nah, he really can't stand for it. but he isn't allowed to say anything. he's just a childhood friend after all. not for long though.
yandere! childhood friend who wishes he would've accepted your offer to learn how to fuck as well. but no, he just had to be way too delusional back then and tell you to wait for the right one. he must've thought that you'd feel the same and confess then he'd court you slowly before getting to that stage... that never happened unfortunately. not yet at least. he'll make it happen.
yandere! childhood friend who's still a hopeless romantic at heart. a delusional one but a romantic nonetheless. he brings you out on "platonic dates" or whatever the fuck you like to call it, comfort you after your shitty excuse of a partner dumps you, and treats you like the deity that you are. you only deserve the best and he'll be there to provide. none of these losers can't treat you well. he can. he really hopes it'll help you see him as a potential boyfriend!
"i just," you blow your nose, tears streaming down your cheeks as your childhood friend rubs at your back tenderly. "don't know why he'd want to dumo me! we've been going strong for a year already! it's so out of the blue!" yeah, out of the blue huh... not really out of the blue for someone who's been actively theeatening that poor excuse of a man. that menas him, obviously. why he's been threatening him, you ask? because he's not treating you the way you should be treated, duh! sure you look happy but are you really? probably not, he's sure of it. "hey hey, don't worry... I'm here now, aren't i?" he always is, and he always will. you just need to understand that fact and you'll start seeing him in a different light too. don't worry, he has lots of patience. just... don't go sleeping with other people again.
yandere! childhood friend who may or may not be totally super duper mega in love with you. yeah, definitely not in love with you. that would be weird, right? come on, he's your childhood friend! sure you two might've kissed when you were kids and promised to marry one another but those were kiddy promises! that's all they are! he... totally doesn't believe you actually wanna marry him and be his forever and ever.
"so have you started thinking about your future?" he pauses at your question, rubbing at his empty ring finger. future, huh? funny how you ask that when you two are destined to be together at the end of it all. i mean, the two of your promised it as kids, didn't you? sure you're exploring now but at the end if the day, it's him that you come back to, don't you? even if just as a friend. but that's the present, not the future. "nah, not really. just wanna focus on the current moment, y'know?" bullshit, and he knows it. but he doesn't wanna scare you away. not yet at least. you're still out lookign for others which means you haven't come round to the idea of you two together. not to worry, he'll give you a little more time to see how good he is. how good things could be between you two if you just gave him the chance. "i mean, you're here with me." he chuckles, taking your hand in his before placing it on his cheek. you're warm. he likes your warmth, it's so soothing. "that's more than enough for me." half lidded eyes gaze at you, full of emotion and hidden longing before he hums softly. the teo fo you sit in the park in silence, enjoying each other's presence. in the moonlight, everything seems to slow and engulf the two of you in a quiet embrace. he only wishes you would just love him back already. "yeah, I'm glad to be by your side too, best friend." ...he really hates those words. don't worry, good things come to those who wait. and you will be his in due time. you've already had his heart, now all he needs is yours.
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himbosandhardwear · 1 month ago
Text
Steddie I Soulmate AU I 2k I Rated Mature I idiot4idiot
The thing about linking with your soulmate, you never knew when it was going to happen. There were horror stories about it happening during weddings to someone else or while performing heart surgery or landing a plane, but linking was so rare, stories like that seemed more like fairy tales than cautionary ones.
If anyone had asked Eddie what he thought about it, he would've said the odds of there being some guy out there destined to be his mate, let alone that he'd have to worry about linking during some critical moment, were astronomically low.
He'd be wrong.
Because his ears are ringing, his vision has tunnelled, and there's an empty vacuum where his usual chaotic thoughts should be. All signs pointing toward-
Hello?
Jesus H. Christ, not now! Not right now, this cannot be happening now. Quick! Think of something else! Uhhh… Golems! Ice golems! Or maybe frost giants. Yeah! Not having hate sex with your arch nemesis. Shit! Stop thinking about it! Frost giants, frost giants, frost giants!
Hate sex? He hears echo around his noggin next. Arch nemesis?
Fuuuuuck. No, darlin’, don't even worry about that stray thought! Nothing to see here. I'm, uh, baking! Yeah. Brownies. For a charity bake sale
A long pause, empty space between them, before he says, I don't believe you. I think you are having sex
Sex?! He screeches. How dare you! I would never!
You would. Go balls deep into a guy you don't even like, sounds like to me. Class act.
Oh god, there’s gotta be a way to salvage this.
No, let me explain, please!
Knock yourself out
Right. So, this guy, I know him from school, right? And he was always kind of a jerk. The space between them pings with a sort of stung feeling but Eddie doesn't understand how any of this works yet so he ignores it. But we end up having a few mutual friends, and this one really weird event happens that forces us to, like, team up, I guess. After all that I'm spending more time around the guy and he's not so bad. Invited me over to smoke up with him, which was cool. I'm gonna be totally honest, I'm not sure how exactly we got here, the sex part, but it’s pretty hot and heavy, kinda aggressive, so… yeah. Hate sex I guess
Soulmate is quiet again. His feelings bleed through anyway, at least Eddie's pretty sure that's what he's getting. It feels like embarrassment and disappointment.
You okay? Did I scare you off?
You don't like the guy at all? You said arch nemesis
Oh. Uh. Well… How did he explain to his future partner, if he hadn't already ruined it, that he likes him plenty, he's just been holding him at arms length, metaphorically, because he assumed the guy was straight? Up until roughly twenty minutes ago. He should probably start with honesty.
No, I like him okay. He's not as bad as I'd always thought. We give each other shit but I'm pretty sure it's just left over bullshit stereotypes from high school. I bully him about his music taste, he bullies me about my shitty van. That type of thing
…Right
He waits to hear back from his soulmate but he's not very talkative. That's okay, Eddie can talk enough for both of them.
So, what were you up to when we linked? Not driving I hope
He can hear the guy sighing over the link, which is worrying.
You'll never believe it, but I'm also having sex at the moment
Seriously? That's hilarious
Yeah. A hoot
Not having fun?
I was. But I recently found out the guy doesn't like me that much. So, yeah, real mood killer
Oh man. That sucks
Oh my god. Yeah, it really does. Kinda wish he'd get off of me so we can get the awkward part over with but he's distracted at the moment
Doing what?! Eddie yells, offended on his behalf.
“He’s busy not realizing he linked to the guy he was hate fucking.”
Huh?
“Eddie, open your fucking eyes.”
That's Steve talking.
He blinks his eyes open to see Steve looking up at him. He's not pleased.
Wait
“Yeah.”
Oh my god
“As impressive as it is that you managed to stay hard through that whole thing, I'd appreciate it if you-” He hisses as Eddie, rudely he realizes, pulls out without warning.
He scrambles to the end of the bed, bunching up the comforter around his junk. “I'm so sorry, fuck, Steve, I'm so sorry. I don't… I didn't…”
He can't fix this, he starts to slowly comprehend. He's made Steve think he hates him.
“Nah, it's cool. I get it.”
I don't hate you, I swear. You have to believe me
“Sure, Eddie.” He's yanking his briefs back on, angry and trying not to show it. “You just don't like me much.” Can't believe I did this again. So fucking stupid
Eddie's certain he's not meant to hear any of that but he responds anyway.
You're not stupid. Please let me explain
“You already did. And I am fucking stupid,” he snaps. “Here I thought we were flirting this whole time and you thought we were bullying each other. That's real fuckin’ stupid of me. I'd convinced myself you actually-” He snaps his teeth shut but Eddie can still hear the unfinished -liked me. “I really wish you would control your feelings, dude. You're broadcasting your horror straight into my head.”
“I don't know how to stop,” he quietly admits.
“Well if you'd ever shown up to health class you'd know how to control it.”
I never thought I would get a soulmate
Steve's surprise at that pings around his brain before he does what Eddie can't and shuts it down.
“I did. I've been thinking about it for years.”
And you ended up with me… And I ruined it before we even got started. I ruined it. Steve Harrington is my soulmate and I ruined it. What the fuck
“You don't have to say it like I'm some kind of prize.” He steps into his jeans and tugs them back up to his hips, not even bothering to do them up. Which is- “I guess it's nice that you think I'm hot. That's something. Maybe we'll be the first casual hookup soulmates.”
He has to fix this. Somehow. Think, god damnit! Wait! That's it! He just has to show Steve what he's thinking!
“I wish you wouldn't.”
“Too bad!” He snaps back.
Okay, as embarrassing as this is about to be, he has to tell the truth.
Eddie was in the 8th grade, Steve in 7th, when they first met. Or, when Eddie first noticed Steve anyway, they never really spoke to each other, their cliques already established by then. But Eddie can remember it like it was yesterday. It was lunch, Eddie was walking by with his bagged PB&J, when he heard it. Steve laughing. It was so joyful, Eddie didn't even know what he was laughing about but it made him smile anyway. Of course one of Steve's shitty jock friends caught him staring and called him a queer freak but that wasn't unusual.
“What the fuck, Eddie? Why do you remember that? And how are you so good at visualizing?”
He ignores the questions to move on to the next memory. Eddie's sophomore year they somehow ended up in the same Shop class. Again, they never spoke but he got to watch Steve work, tongue poking out while he concentrated, the proud look on his face when he whittled some hunk of wood into a recognisable shape.
“I forgot about that. It was a dolphin. I was dating Chelsea Hosteller, they were her favorite animal.”
“Lucky her.”
“Hey, fuck you, man, you're the one showing me this shit! What am I supposed to assume from any of this? You thought I was cute? So what? You clearly don't like who I am as a person, so what difference does it make?”
He's not going to have the patience for every single moment, and they're a lot of them, Eddie realizes that now. So he speed runs through them, making sure to send every bit of feeling through their link.
Steve in his Scoops outfit, luring Eddie to the mall but never making him brave enough to go in. The horror of not knowing whether Steve was alive or dead when he heard about the mall burning down. The joy of finding him at Family Video, somewhere he had reason to visit.
You never even talked to me there
Listening to every word to every story Henderson told him about Steve and his bravery. Pretending to be annoyed so no one noticed he was eating it up. Getting to know the real Steve over Spring Break, the giddiness he couldn't quite tamp down, even as he was scared shitless. The pain of knowing Steve was still in love with Nancy Wheeler, even though it was the obvious narrative to Steve's fairytale life. Of course he gets the girl at the end.
What? Is that why you-
The way he stuck around afterward, even though their dynamic was more antagonistic than friendly, and the way Eddie thrived off of every snarky comment. How it felt like banter even though Eddie knew, by all logic and reason, Steve was merely tolerating his presence. They would always be antithetical to each other, circling but never meeting.
Eddie, no
Steve growling ‘Do you ever shut up!’ before pouncing on him downstairs. The heavy pounding of his heart as he wrestled Steve up the stairs. The way his brain never did catch up to what was happening or why, until it was too late, and he was ruining both the greatest sex he'd ever had and also the chance to prove, though he's still completely unworthy, that he has already been primed and ready to fall for Steve for years. The shame of ruining it. The heartbreak of ruining it. The teeny, tiny spark of hope as Steve stares him down. He has to close his eyes to avoid it, lest he say something stupid and fuck it up again.
You…do like me?
Yeah, Stevie. I like you a whole lot. I just didn't think I was allowed to like you. I didn't realize you liked me too. I'm sorry I said all that shit earlier. I didn't want to tell the guy I'd just linked with that I was thoroughly enjoying the chance to sleep with this guy I'd had a crush on for years. That seemed rude
The bed dips and so does Eddie's stomach. Steve's enormous hands slide up his neck, into his hair, and gently cradle his face as he leans in to kiss Eddie square on the mouth.
Oh. Hi
Hi
This is nice
I think so too. How do you feel about finishing what we started but this time we both know that we like each other?
That sounds awesome. But are you sure? I really, really fucked up the first time
I thought you were perfect up until you called me your arch nemesis
I have been told that sometimes I'm a little dramatic
You know what, that's fair. I really should've taken that as a compliment, if anything
See? Now you get it
What I'm getting is another condom. Hold my ankle so I don't slide off the bed
You got it, baby
Unbelievable. Salvaged the wreckage of his own stupidity and managed to bag the hottest guy in town! Score one for the nerds!
“I heard that.”
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singmyaubade · 1 year ago
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Shades Of Cool
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toxic!dark!rafe cameron x female!pogue!reader
summary: you are just living your life, completely normal and free. but, what happens when rafe cameron decides that you are his? he's danger.
warnings: smut! 18+ stalking, manipulation, rafe is obsessed with reader, fingering, swearing, unprotected sex, slight breeding kink, praise, oral (male receiving), dark!rafe cameron, choking, jealousy, violence, heavy smut..
a/n: i'm delighted I'm finally starting this, even if it took me so long. i genuinely hope you all enjoy this series. i understand that this a bit short, but the narrative is only getting started, so things will only get wilder! however, it is to be expected—this is a rafe cameron fic.
series
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One thing that you hated about Outer Banks was how the heat still radiated at night, causing excessive amounts of water to be drank and a great amount of fans that blew hot air into your face.
It only made everyone irritable and only caused more arguments like now,
"I swear to god JJ, I am about to fucking murder you if you say another word," You hissed, giving him a glare as he mockingly grew scared.
"I agree," Cleo said before falling back into her nap.
"All I'm saying is that we have been moping around here for hours meanwhile we could be partying on the fresh beach and cool water," JJ replied, using his hands to represent the scenery to all of you.
"I'm going to have to agree with Y/N," Pope said, turning his head to JJ, "I'm already in tough shit with my parents for when you knocked over my great-grandmothers vase," Pope glared.
JJ put his hands up in defense, "I told you tequila makes me clumsy,"
"Besides every single Kook is there, including Rafe and if he sees Sarah with us, it will only bring another fight and you are not going back to jail," Kie warned, still closing her eyes while the fan blew the air in her face, blowing her hair.
"When have we ever been scared of Rafe?" JJ asked.
"When he gave me a full smackdown for doing my job," Pope scoffed.
"And when he almost drowned me," Sarah chimed in from across the room where she was laying on John B's legs on the carpet floor.
"And when he shot Sheriff Peterkin in front of us," John B added.
"And when-" Pope began.
"Okay that's enough," He said as you giggled, turning your head back to the fan.
You didn't know much about Rafe Cameron since you had moved to Outer Banks only last year and you had met the "star Pogues" a few months ago.
You had never really seen Rafe's face ever, only heard of him honestly.
But you didn't know if it was a bad thing.
All you had heard about was how evil and villainous he was which caused some places to be off limits for the fact that the boys couldn't handle another beat down with the Kooks and there was a greater matter at hand.
But still, you always were curious about "evil" Rafe Cameron.
"You guys are no fun," JJ pouted, sitting beside you on the couch.
You patted the lower part of his leg, "Poor baby," You sarcastically said to which moved his leg swiftly causing you to laugh.
Suddenly the lights and fans turned off as you all except for JJ groaned, knowing that meant the electricity was off you and you would have to deal with the heat and darkness.
Which meant the only choice was the beach party,
JJ cheered, "I win!"
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You crossed your arms as you walked on the warm sand, lots of cheering and loud music around you. You could see the Kooks and the Pogues in their own groups, not daring to interact with eachother.
It was hard to get used to the fact that there were two groups of people based on economic statuses and that it meant that if you were one thing, the other one hated you.
You had never been to a place like that but you just kinda got used to it.
Yet you still could never tell which group was really which sometimes.
You were forced to walk around by yourself as John B and Sarah wandered off to a quiet spot while JJ started drinking with Kie as his babysitter and Cleo and Pope wandered around.
All of it sounded like a lot of third wheeling which made you stay away.
But you didn't mind being alone, you liked listening to the waves and watching the festivities that went along with a party.
And you knew that a beer would help you get more into the party festivities.
You walked over the keg where a man with a shaved head and a matching tank top and shorts poured himself a beer as you curiously looked at him.
You had to admit that he was one of the most attractive men you had seen before.
His lips were a perfect shade of pink and they were smooth like sucking on a cherry. His veins were bulging from his hands and you could see the peach fuzz on his jawline that you could only really see upclose.
You snapped out of your analysis as he looked at you as you waited there awkwardly, forming a smile on your face.
"Sorry to creepily stand here, I'm just trying to get a uh-" You said, pointing to the keg.
His face studied you for a second, almost as if he was trying to figure you out. You could tell by his face that he had never seen you before and he looked as if he was trying to figure out if you were a Kook or Pogue.
He chuckled, "Didn't mean to take so long, I wouldn't have if I had seen your pretty face sooner," He smirked, looking you up and down, causing you to blush.
You felt stupid for blushing over something that a man probably said to every pretty girl he saw but you felt something different about him.
You were taken aback by his boldness, "Do you say that to every women that waits for her turn on the keg?" You teased.
"Only the pretty ones," He replied, causing you to laugh.
"Smooth talker I see," You smiled.
"Always," He joked, "I swear I've never seen you around and usually, you know everyone in Outer Banks," He probed.
"Yeah, I just moved here last year," You answered, "I haven't made my rounds yet,"
"Figured," He said, "I would've definitely noticed you,"
"Pfft," You beamed, "I'm sure you would've walked past me on the beach, there are many beautiful girls here,"
"Nah," He laughed, looking off, "You are different from them,"
"How could you already assume that?" You asked, curiosity biting at you.
"For one, you aren't stuck up and preppy which is most the girls on this island," He grinned as you giggled.
"Ay, they aren't all like that," You replied.
"Most of 'em," He added, "But I don't pay much attention to them,"
"Figures," You said, eyebrow raising.
He saw your eyes move the keg and his cup before he offered his cup forward.
"Might as well take mine, I wouldn't feel proud of myself if I let you pour one yourself," He winked.
Great attempt at being a gentlemen.
"No no, I got it," You said before he shook his head.
"I insist" He said, his thumb grazing yours.
"Thank you," You smiled, "I'm Y/N" You introduced, taking the cup from him while extending your other hand for him to shake.
He shook your hand, "I'm Rafe," He replied with a smile as yours slowly fell.
The Rafe? The Rafe you were basically supposed to never interact with and who was the supposed devil? That Rafe?
"Rafe Cameron?" You asked, standing frozen.
"Guess my reputation precedes me," He joked as you didn't laugh but instead cleared your throat.
You took your hand back quickly, "Oh, i-it's nice to meet you," You cleared your throat, "My friends are waiting so I'm gonna-"
He clearly figured you out, "Pogue, I'm guessing?" He snickered.
Your face wrinkled, "Is that supposed to be a funny thing?"
"Hilarious actually," He answered, only angering you more.
"I don't see what's funny about that?" You crossed your arms with ur drink resting in your hand.
He wiped his jaw, "Must be tough at the bottom of the food chain,"
Your nose flared, "Must be tough being an elite asshole,"
He laughed, "I just think it's an unfortunate cause, I mean it's just unlucky," He smirked.
Asshole.
"Unlucky?" Your lip pursed, " I think what's more unlucky is thinking that your cool for a fucked up economic status that has been perpetuated on an island,"
"I just don't believe your friends belong on Outer Banks," He said, not a hint of hesitance in his voice.
He really believed in this bullshit.
"I mean you would really rather hang out with a group of dirty Pogues?" He snickered, looking off.
"Well I am one of them and they are my friends," You scoffed, "You seem more dirty than us," You insulted.
"Is that so?" Rafe mocked.
"Do you wanna talk about your father's dirty money?" You asked.
"I would watch that pretty mouth," He replied, inching closer.
"Or what?" You hummed, acting braver than you usually would.
"Fuck around and find out sweetheart," He came closer, breath fawning on your face.
The whiskey on his breath kissed your nose but not breaking your eye contact with him as you inched closer, eyes on his lips.
As he tried to close the gap, you threw the drink in his face. "Oohs" and snickers filled around the both of you as you stomped away from him.
He smirked, wiping the alcohol off of his face.
'What an asshole,' You thought,
Little did you know that Rafe only grew to like you more.
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You found JJ and Kie sitting by the beach together as she laid her head on his shoulder. You were thinking about interrupting them but tarnish their moment, you choosing instead to call it a night and also you didn't feel like trying to find the rest of the group.
You were glad that you knew yourself enough to drive to the party considering that you got tired fast. You couldn't really see in the parking lot due to how dark it was and away from the lights.
You digged in your back pocket for your phone to pull out of the flashlight as you reached for your keys but dropped them instead in the process.
You audibly groaned as you searched on the floor in the darkness for the keys. You went on your knees with your flashing light, searching on the ground as you heard footsteps behind you, darting your flashlight behind you but seeing nothing.
You had a bad feeling but you thought it was paranoia because you were alone in the parking lot and maybe a little due to the interaction you had earlier with Rafe.
You couldn't stop thinking about how he came off as nice but switched so quickly into an elitist piece of shit.
Sounds like how they described him.
But still, there was a pit in your stomach that felt like butterflies when he grazed your thumb.
You sighed, pushing the thoughts out as you finally grabbed your keys, using the concrete-sanded floor push yourself back up off the ground.
Suddenly, you felt a cloth on your mouth and a hand covering your waist as your muffled screams filled the parking lot, trying to kick your attacker behind you.
You felt yourself drifting into the darkness as you screamed one last time,
And everything went black.
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tags: @hysteriahall @avengersassemblee @lighttism @whereismymindnow @hotch-meeeeeuppppp @vi06ma01 @haven247 @vanessa-rafesgirl @blvebanisters @riordanness @aleidag1rly @muzanjackson22
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qqueenofhades · 7 months ago
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I just feel like even if we all vote and Biden wins, Trump won't accept the loss, and eventually they'll just put him in anyway. And then there won't be another real election. Even if Biden wins and somehow is actually confirmed (which again, I think is unlikely) we're going to have to do this for 30 more years because of the SC, and that isn't at all sustainable.
All this isn't to say I won't vote but I just think people are being way too optimistic about what happens if Biden wins. I don't think him winning will keep Trump out or the horrible fascist future at bay.
Look, I get the fear. I do, I do... but this is also one of the times when you have to ask if it's actually telling you something true, or if it's just preying on that generalized feeling of doom to make everything seem hopeless even if we win again. And that is... there is absolutely no actual mechanism for Trump to be installed as president if Biden wins the Electoral College (since as we have repeatedly seen, the popular vote is immaterial). SCOTUS is horrible and evil and are trying to interfere as much ahead of time for Trump as they can, but part of that is because they can't simply issue an order for Biden to be removed and Trump to become God King By Fiat. That is not how it works. If Biden wins in November, he will be president until his term ends, he steps down, Kamala takes over, or anything else.
Trump tried a coup with all the entire overwhelming might of the US government as the sitting president last time; fortunately, it failed. Reforms to the Electoral Count Act have been made to prevent another January 6. The Department of Defense and the military are still under (and would be on another January 6) Biden's command, not Trump's. That's not to say that Trump won't try some shit with his insane cult followers, but he is just a late 70s conman from Queens out on bail and under sentence for a criminal trial, who is already the biggest and most disgraced loser and asshole in American political history. He is so desperate to cheat his way back into power because in a real sense, this IS the last-chance saloon for him. He can't put off the legal proceedings, however long they take, for another four years. He's losing his marbles at a rapid rate. I'm just saying: we don't know what or when, but there will be (and already have been) real consequences for him. That is why he is scrabbling so hard.
"Even if we vote, nothing matters and Trump will win anyway" is another of those insidious lies that works to make you feel as if the battle is endless and pointless and none of its victories matter. Of course it will not all be magically fixed forever if Biden wins. We will still have to figure some godforsaken fucking way to expand SCOTUS or kick Alito and Thomas off it. But we will have bought ourselves, our democracy, our country, and the world time to do that, and put another nail in Trump's coffin. That matters. It matters a lot.
Fascism wants to present itself as overwhelming, irresistible, inevitable, and ready to happen no matter what you do, and that's what your brain wants you to buy in now. But that's not the case, Trump is not inevitable or some all-powerful monolith (in fact, another of the debate takeaways seemed to be that Biden looked bad but people still hate Trump too much for it to really shift anything). He is a loser, a fraud, a conman, a liar, and a crook, and he WANTS you to fear him like an almighty god. Don't give him or the MAGAGOP the satisfaction.
Frankly, having to endure another four months of this might kill us all, and I know that we are tired and scared (me too). But IT IS NOT INEVITABLE THAT WE ARE DOOMED. Not at all. Let's hang onto that and tell that anxiety doom voice to shove it.
Hugs.
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goingdownondaisuke · 25 days ago
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Can you write the tuplar crew with a s/o who can't control their volume in bed (🔞 nsfw)
ofc ofc!! thank u for ur request lovely anon!
(afab reader, she/her pronouns, nsfw under the cut!!)
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anya ۶ৎ
gets very flustered when you won't shut the hell up
esp on the tulpar, will try to gently remind you to stay quiet while she's beneath you
and if that doesn't work, she'll slap her hand over your mouth and finger you a bit more roughly
its a bit different when you're riding her face, however
like before, she'll give you a small warning by squeezing your waist
and if you're still loud, she'll dig her long nails into your hips and thrust her tongue into you
...which is kinda counterintuitive but oh well
now, if you two are on earth and in the comfort of your shared home, make all the noise you want!!
she totally gets off to it
'no way im making someone as beautiful as her feel this good...'
"hey, shhh, keep it down a bit, yeah?"
curly ۶ৎ
regardless of whether or not you're typically loud during sex, you're going to be loud w curly, because man is he BIG
he knows you're gonna be loud so he usually fucks you in the cockpit or utility room, where it's a bit more soundproof
but of course he's gonna ask you to quiet down regardless bc who knows who could be lurking??!
he'll either tell you to bite your hand, cover your mouth, or he'll rip off your panties and shove them into your mouth
none of them work
for the rare times he'll take you in his room, he always has you face down and screaming into the pillows
he wants to see ur pretty little face scrunched up in the most blissful expressions, but goddamn he just dicks you down too well
a small (huge) part of him really just wants to fuck you anywhere and let everyone hear you scream his name
"fuck, princess, that feel real good, yeah?"
"god, so loud y/n."
daisuke ۶ৎ
it just swells his ego, tbh
he's just like, "wow, i'm making her make these sounds?!"
so cute
of course, he still wants you to hush, but isn't sure how to get you to without being mean
he'll try to be as sweet as possible, he'll run his hand up and down your waist or press his thumb to your lips while whispering little praises in you ear
"you feel so good, but please keep it down before we get caught!"
starts to get a little scared when you keep moaning and squealing at an excessive volume, genuinely has no idea what to do 😭
like curly, will also try to take you to more closed off places, mainly the utility room because it's not odd for him to be in there anyway
it's hilarious how panicked he gets when you two are fucking, one time he took off his hawaiian shirt and shoved it into your mouth
and surprisingly it did the job!!!!
"am i doing good? i must be..."
jimmy ۶ৎ
he totally gets off to it
so much so that he won't even do anything, he'll just let you scream
it happens so often that curly has to talk to the two of you about your volume
he even separated you two for a day, not like that was gonna do anything beneficial
like daisuke, but on a way worse level, it inflates his ego to no end
you'll be moaning loud as fuck and he's just there grinning in your face
he's not very used to women actually enjoying his dick as much as you do, they're typically just cheap whores or girls he's taken advantage of
but you?? coming and clamping around his cock as you moan into the air?? without being forced??
it makes him come like a thousand times quicker
"ooh, you like that dick? i know you do."
"yeah, let everyone else know who's pussy this is."
swansea ۶ৎ
he knows how to deal with youngins like you, after all, he has tons of experience from his wife
he gives your ass harsh smacks when you don't hush, and if that doesn't work he'll pull his thick cock out of you and chastise you while smacking it on your cunt
he's definitely a pussy slapper/clit pincher
orgasm denial orgasm denial orgasm denial
will also just straight up slap the fuck outta you if you keep on
he's so mean i kinda need him
he literally doesn't understand you, its so easy to shut up to him
prefers to have you ass up face down so you can make all that noise onto whatever surface he's fucking you on
dw he's super sweet afterwards, will gives you kisses all over and whisper praise and hdjidissk
"damn woman, can't be that good..."
"make a noise like that again and i'll leave you high and dry young lady."
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mameillieureennemie · 11 days ago
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this was the idea i had. i had to write it, or else i'd lose my mind. so have some smut, freshly baked, and homemade. 👍🏾
mechanic!vi x afab!reader
cw: mechanic!vi, afab!reader, 18+, nsfw; minors don't you DARE interact with this
summary: vi's work takes her away sometimes. she misses you a lot.
work takes vi away sometimes, to different cities and, at times, countries that require her attention. she's good at what she does; there isn't anyone who can fix and restore cars like she can. it's a skill she's developed and built since she was old enough to hold a screwdriver, her interest in mechanics starting long before that, too.
she enjoys her career, adores that she gets to work with cars every day, and get paid quite handsomely for it. there are times, though, where she wishes she wasn't so damn good at her job because, like now, it whisks her away.
away from you.
she's currently attending to a client's urgent call; their car had been having engine trouble, and none of the surrounding mechanics could fix it. It's a luxury car, too, with a price tag that has too many zeros on it, so it requires delicate hands and patient.
both of which vi has.
when she's working, at least.
she's been away from you for the past week now, and it's driving her a bit insane. these jobs only take a few days, at most, but parts are a struggle to find sometimes. so she has to stay until they arrive so she can get the job done.
her cilents treat her nicely, have paid for her accommodation and feeding. she's being well-looked after, having her every whim be catered to.
but still.
she wishes you were here.
"it's only a few more days," you tell her one evening via video call. you're so gorgeous it hurts, your smile shining with your smile. you're lounging on your shared bed, curled up around the pillow against your chest. "didn't you say the order's coming in tomorrow?"
vi sighs, leaning back against the headboard of her hotel room's bed. which sucks because you're not in it with her. "yeah, but i'm kind of scared it's gonna get delayed because of the weather and shit," she grumbles. "if that happens, can you come? because if i go another two days without you, i'll lose my goddamn mind."
"aw," you coo teasingly, hiding behind your (her) pillow enough so only your beautiful eyes show. a coy move that has vi's blood roaring. "only two days?"
"i'd say one, but i don't want you to think i'm obsessed with you or something," vi replies, partly playfully because god knows how obsessed she is with you. "wouldn't want to chase you off, especially when i'm not there to catch you."
"ooh scary," you say, still a tease as you lift your head a little from behind the pillow. enough so she can see your lovely mouth, so sweet and waiting to be kissed. "and if i ran and you caught me, what would you do to me?"
heat starts to simmer beneath vi's skin, warming her up nicely from within. she roves her eyes over your pretty face, licks her lips when she thinks about all the things she could do to you.
all the things she's planning to do to you once she gets home.
"can't give away all my secrets," vi replies, her voice having gone a bit hoarse from her budding arousal. "you'll find it soon enough."
your breath hitches a little, at the implication, and your gaze darkens ever so slightly. it's enough to have both of you suddenly on edge, desperation raging violently in the both of you.
the order does come in the next day, thank god, and vi jumps into work. if she's able to finish this today, she can flight back home to you tomorrow. all her focus is thrown into doing an immaculate job, as always, so she can get paid and use that money to spoil you rotten.
she's on a short break when her phone chimes, notifying her of a message. she instantly knows it's you, judging by the jingle and how you personalised it on a drunken night. vi's never bothered to change it because it's yours, and anything of yours is perfect.
vi chugs her bottle of water while simultaneously unlocking her phone and tapping the notification. the chat opens, greeting her with a video that appears rather inconspicuous at first. vi doesn't think anything of it; in fact, she's smiling already, thinking it's one of those cute video messages you send her when she's away.
but when she taps play, and the first breathy note of your moan floats through the speaker, vi's world flips upside down. she quickly pauses the video, cheeks aflame, as she clutches her phone to her chest. her heartbeat is thundering loudly in her ears, sending through a message of panic and instant arousal.
vi blinks into the emptiness of the huge garage, swallows, draws in a shaky breath, and manages to look back down at her phone.
with a shaky thumb, she presses play again and...
there you are.
straddling her motorcycle, clad in a tiny skirt that rides high with every grind of your hips. your hands grip at the handlebars, quivering a little as you use them for balance, use them to pull yourself up and push down.
you're a vision, eyes tightly closed as you find your pleasure on the leather seat. soft whimpers fall from your parted lips, gradually increasing in volume as you grind your dripping cunt down harder.
vi watches, entranced and halfway soaked, as your head falls back with a whine of her name.
"violet,"
fuck.
she can't see the mess that you're leaving on her seat, but she knows it's drenched. knows that your slick is soaking into the fabric, making it easier and smoother for you to ride. making it better, so much better, and vi's vision grows hazy at the thought.
"please, ah, please, vi," you moan, needy, as your grinds turn into harsh bounces. "i...i need you, hah, w-wanna cum—"
vi's eyes flutter, her free hand shooting down to slip past the pants of her coveralls. she hisses when she feels how wet she is, releasing a keen as she starts to rub at her throbbing clit.
"vi, vi—" you gasp, one of your hands leaving the handlebars to slip under your skirt. you moan loudly, lips parting further as you nearly cry. "i'm gonna—"
"you're gonna cum, sweetheart?" vi pants, her own orgasm cresting already. "gonna, ah fuck, cum for me?"
as if you could hear her, you suddenly nod frantically and give a startled cry, eyes going wide and unseeing as you convulse with the strength of your orgasm. there's a faint splash that catches vi's attention and that, that has her biting back a scream as she makes a mess of herself. all wet and messy and so fucking good, it has her seeing stars.
it leaves her loose-limbed, has her leaning against a wall as she struggles to catch her breath. but she's barely given a chance when her phone rings and she answers it without checking the caller ID.
she already knows who it is.
"you're so evil, baby," vi says, still breathless, and you laugh for a full thirty seconds before saying,
"so i guess you don't want to see the other video then?"
"oh my god."
vi can't fucking wait to get home.
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