#god i'm glad though the tracks they're on are lovely

[pyrussprite]

yALL. FUCKIN. YALL. https://alonetone.com/cedarhillrefugees/playlists/turn-back-turn-back/mose-melton i'm thrashing, i'm shrieking into my hat you don't understand i thought this album was never coming out and i find out 6 years later???

[aromanticasterisms]

got most of the way through emilie's story quest before maintenance started and ough. it was made for me

[valiantstarlights]

Which Hob Gadling Are You? Quiz

Instructions: Get a pen and paper (or open your notes app) to keep track of your answers and scores. Select one response and add +1 to your tally. At the end, the letter with the most number of tally marks is your result. There are 8 possible results, as there are 8 versions of Hob. Enjoy! 😊✨

--

1.) How well do you flirt?

Not sure. There's no one to flirt with. (A)

Fucking terrible. (G)

Not trying, not interested. (E)

Somewhat of a disaster, but I'd like to think there's hope for me. (B)

Not sure. I think I'm decent at it, but... (C)

I'm often not sure if I'm being flirted with, but if the person is my type, then I'll do my best to flirt back! (H)

I know what I'm doing, and hopefully it's my date tonight. ;) (F)

Honestly? I'm at a point in my life where I don't care if I'm good at flirting or not. (D)

2.) How much do you wanna fuck/get fucked by your date?

0% - Not right now. I have other priorities. (E)

25% - I'm not actively thinking about it, but if they're interested, then I'm game. (B and D)

50% - Why not? My date is super hot and I'm very interested in them. But if they're not in the mood, then that's fine, too. (H and C)

75% - Look, I'm making an Effort here. It would be nice if my date could show some interest. (G and A)

100% - OH HECK YEAH (F)

3.) Finish the sentence: "How..."

did you know that I'd still be here? (B)

long should I wait? (A)

did you know my name? (H)

wonderful to see you again. (D)

the hell did I fuck that up? (C)

rude! (G)

do you want me? ;) (F)

much longer until my order gets here? (E)

4.) Pick one word from the list:

Life (E)

Patience (A)

Change (F)

Courage (H)

Wonder (B)

Contentment (D)

Friendship (C)

Prosperity (G)

5.) Do you hate Shakespeare?

Ugh. Do we have to talk about him? I have more important things to worry about. (E)

I'm so glad you asked. Here, make yourself comfortable. I have a 6 hour presentation on why he sucks. (D)

I'd rather read a phonebook. (A)

I don't know who that is. (B)

(sighs) If I say no, will you leave me alone? (C)

THAT FUCKING BASTARD (G)

I watched one of his plays. Still think he's overrated, though. (F)

What's a shake spear? Is that a weapon or something? (H)

6.) How likely are you to say stupid shit?

Everything I say is stupid shit. (G)

Only when I'm drunk. (H)

I have no filter, so... (B)

I'd like to think I have learned not to be so careless. (E)

Fuck! I thought I had it! Apparently not. Gods motherfuck I'm never speaking again. (C)

I'm trying, okay? I really am. (F)

I said stupid shit once and I regret it until now. (A)

Very likely. Just wait and see. Any second now. (D)

--

YES OR NO QUESTIONS: If your answer is yes, +1 to the letter indicated.

7.) Do you believe in love at first sight? (H)

8.) Do you get excited over things/topics that others consider boring? (B)

9.) Are you content with the life you have right now? (G)

10.) Do you still feel hopeful, despite the horrors? (E)

11.) Are you always DTF (Down To Fight)? (F)

12.) Have you ever fallen in love with a friend? (C)

13.) Would you wait/Have you waited for hours for your friend/s to arrive? (A)

14.) Are you willing to wait however long it takes for the love of your life to appear in your life? (D)

--

15.) BONUS: Which is your favorite Hob?

1389 (H)

1489 (B)

1589 (G)

1689 (E)

1789 (F)

1889 (C)

1989 (A)

2022 (D)

--

RESULTS:

Mostly A's = 1989 Hob

Mostly B's = 1489 Hob

Mostly C's = 1889 Hob

Mostly D's = 2022 Hob

Mostly E's = 1689 Hob

Mostly F's = 1789 Hob

Mostly G's = 1589 Hob

Mostly H's = 1389 Hob

[lynn-tged-posting]

tged webtoon ep 171 spoilers and thoughts but i'm mostly just going "YAY I LIKED THIS MOMENT" and more below the cut

.

.

.

DEMON KING LLOYD HELLO. HELLO?? WHAT. WHY?? BUT WOW. HOLY SHIT. I REALLY REALLY LIKE THIS

I LOVE WHEN CHARACTERS GAIN WINGS AND HORNS AND . GHGHHGHGHHG AAAHHH ITS MY FAVORITE THING if you didn't already know dragon lloyd was like one of my favorite all-time panels so this is VERY AWESOME FOR ME YAYYY YAAAAYYY HAHAHA

LIKE SERIOUSLY LOOK HE GOT FANGS N SHIT AND. OH MY GODD THE SMOKE SLIPPING PAST HIS LIPS IM SO??? THAT'S SO COOL. I LOVE WHEN THEY DO THAT WITH SMOKE AND MONSTROUS FORMS OF CHARACTERS

genuinely i need to draw this asap. pacing issues aside i am obsessed with how sick this is. i love this a LOT

ok ok back to the top bc theres some stuff i wanna touch on from before demon king lloyd got revealed! because...

"master lloyd taught us". "master lloyd taught us". "master lloyd taught us". "master lloyd taught us".

EXCUSE ME WHAT

YOU'RE TELLING ME THAT OFF SCREEN, LLOYD TOOK TIME OUT OF HIS BUSY ASS DAY. TO TEACH THE KIDS HOW TO PLAY SOCCER. AND THEY HAVE PLAYED ENOUGH TO BE FAMILIAR ENOUGH TO PLAY ON THEIR OWN. WHICH MEANS THAT LLOYD . PLAYED SOCCER WITH THEM . AND WE FIND THIS OUT. NOW?? I. GGHH. THATS SO. CUTE. IM GOING TO BITE HIM. THE FUCKER. WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS TO ME

the fact that they go up to ask him im going to EXPLODE?!?!?

he looks so nonchalant abt it here im cryinf

AND LOOK AT THEM GO THIS IS SO SO SWEET IM VERY GLAD LYRA GOT TO PLAY WITH THEM I LIKE THIS A LOT

this scene, and the beginning scene where the adults were just so casual with her and treating her as a living person with feelings and someone that they can talk to was so so heartwarming i oooghhh my heart

AND THEN THERE HE IS. SMILING IN THE BACK. YOU ASS.

I SEE YOU BEING KIND AND EMPATHETIC AND SELFLESS LLOYD. YOU LOST THE NONCHALANT WAR. YOU CAN'T ESCAPE

christ. i fucking HATE him /j /aff

it is also VERY silly that they're so casual abt. destruction like that HELPPP they got it from someone sob sob, though i imagine since most of the estate consists of people who have done construction it probably isnt that big of a deal when things get destroyed every now n then

and lyra looks so damn happy,,, god im so glad she had a good experience, she really needed one :')

also i completely LOST it when the kid got mad at lyra for not responding with a yes or no HELPPP JESUS CHRIST

again they,,, got it from someone HAHA though honestly i think it tracks. kids can be straightforwardly brutal in their language, especially when they don't really have biases or cares for who they are speaking to. as crazy as this instance looks (LMFAO) i think this fits well with the context of the straightforwardness of children and considering the person who they look up to at the estate. i think it was good for lyra to meet a human child her age who can speak straightforwardly and not skirt past things, if that makes sense? i hope it does!

AND THE DEMON KING TRANSFORMATION i already talked abt it above but i wanna point out this blue system box here

a power outside of the system?!?? what does this mean for the protagonist of the new prequel bk_moon is writing?? is the weather forecasting included in this???

my first assumption right now is that the demon king power is just an in-world power system while everything else (ie the weather forecasting) is external, blue-textbox system. maybe? so lloyd got the demon king power which comes with skills separate from the ones that the system can provide? that would explain why there's no indication of lloyd trying to use the weather forecasting, he probably can't use it,,,? except i dont know why artanis can use it in that case. most likely i am overthinking it LMFAO

semi-related, i am a little confused as to why artanis did this? i guess she really, really trusted him w this power? or maybe her weather forecasting noted that this would be something good to do i have no idea,,, it Does feel a bit sudden i won't lie, i'm not sure how earned this is

also javier and everyone else not reacting that much to the demon king status. SENT ME HAHA "... nothing's changed." LOL

deadpan humor never fails to make me giggle ily javier

also loved the moment where the two of them were bein serious for a sec,,, they've got a job to do they've got people to protect. lloyd will stop fate and javier will be right besides him...

i think showing them at emily's wedding really cements how much they really, REALLY need to fight fate now. the novel events happening is very very bad, but it feels like now that so many people, emily especially, have found THIS much happiness in their lives,,, failing to stop fate will hit even harder. i really like the analogy of a taut bow that the dragon king used when he first described it, bc it's really REALLY showing how much the repercussions will hit if they fail. im praying they succeed,,, please,,, i need a happy ending or i will curl up and turn into an actual shrimp irl.

and now the demons have to build the pantara railroad,,, artanis's expression omfg

she really didn't,,, know,,, she trusted him that much,,,, girl,,,

but it's ok. it'll be a net positive trust! that's how lloyd does things!!! and then soon we'll get the happy ending where we can get the eye of summer and beat up fate and then silly fun times YAYY <- probably copium

some other thoughts of note that i had with a dear mutual (hi sprout :3) about this ep:

we were talking about how the plot seems to be paced right now, and honestly i'm of the opinion that while yes its Technically moving, the way they're ending each ep in this current arc makes it feel like it's going both very slow and very fast, that is to say it feels like it's not moving at all

bc they're like "okay NOW we're gonna do the build project" and it's been like that for several episodes now. pieces are moving but we're going past the point of it all too fast (especially the whole demon king thing. mentioned this before but while cool, doesn't feel as earned simply bc we're both tackling each point and yet blowing past all the points, so it's a lot less satisfying than it should be (despite how awesome it is,,, oh lloyd you give me so much internal conflict </3))

it does make me a lil worried that they're gonna timeskip the hell out of the pantara railroad build. however this episode, although it still has a weird pacing/movement issue, does feel a little bit better than the last two imo, so i have hope that it'll turn out okay, that it'll start heading up! i'm actually really excited to see where they go with this and i'm sure that even if the pacing is still goofy i'll have some kind of fun with it (seriously the panels this ep were wonderful HAHA)

anyway that's all for this week! extremely excited for the next ep,,, ill see yall then,,, lets go pantara railroad arc!!!

[maleyanderecafe]

The Yandere Angel is obsessed with a good-natured succubus (Oneshot)

Created by: aironiro

Genre: Smut

This one was really difficult to word properly and I'm not really sure why. It's not because of the angel and demon words that I don't know it's just kind of weirdly translated. That might be on my end because I finished this one while I was still sick. Hopefully it makes enough sense that it's still enjoyable though, I did like the backstory that the yandere had in this one. It's pretty interesting. If you are interested in a sequel, please donate to kofi.com/lovesicktranslation to fund it.

The story starts out with Lilith being recognized by her fellow succubus, Meribel, who hasn't seen her since the French Revolution. Meribel talks about how there's a corrupted angel attacking people, including the reaper, Yvette. While talking, Meribel is threatened by Cyril, the corrupted angel she was talking about, and Lilith is able to shoo her away. We see that Cyril has been chasing after Lilith for a while, to the point of attacking other Reaper. Cyril asks to have sex with Lilith, which she accepts because she it's kind of her nature, but is basically overwhelmed by it, something that she is confused and horrified by as Cyril ravishes her body. She passes out and recalls her first encounter with him, having gone to an orphanage to corrupt a priest, only to meet Cyril as a child. Cyril seems to be bullied at the orphanage, and Lilith defends him from spirits that want to take his pure soul away. She talks to him a bit, about how she's actually quite fond of humans. She remarks that because his soul is so pure, he will likely become an angel, and that the two will never meet again, and that even if they did, she would eat him. Lilith ends up waking up at her human friend Akari's place after having passed out. She's worried that Cyril might attack Akari and gets a note from Cyril on where to meet. Cyril upon meeting Lilith again, apologizes for what he's done, and states that he wants to be corrupted so that he can be with Lilith again. The two have sex again, and apparently the reason why Lilith feels so good while having sex with Cyril is because it's a taste of true love (?) something that succubus don't taste as they usually charm the people they're targeting. After all that, Lilith takes a liking to Cyril, even planning to allow him to meet and sort of make sure that he doesn't cause any problems.

I'm not super used to oneshot yandere smut splitting up the actual sex part into two sections, but this one does do that and it kept on throwing me for a loop while I was translating. Personally, I think the idea of a succubus feeling intense pleasure when they are actually loved seems kind of stupid, since I feel like there are people who do fall in love at first sight, so a succubus should be used to that type of feeling, or at least have experienced it once before. The lore of the angels and devils aren't made that clear in this story, which might be because this is part of a second series, with the first one introducing Togo and Akari. I guess it doesn't really need to be because it's a smut, but it does leave a lot to be desired. The most interesting part for me is the backstory, since we do get to see how and why Cyril became so obsessed with tracking her down, even if there is seemingly a weird age gap between them since I believe Lilith would have been around 200 years old when meeting Cyril who died at age 14 according to the end profiles (which is never mentioned at all in the story but alright).

Cyril as a yandere is pretty obsessive, having basically ignored the orders of god so much that his halo and wings ended up getting corrupted just so that he could track down Lilith, and even ended up attacking and wounding Yvette (who supposedly is difficult to kill) and nearly hurting Meribel had Lilith not stepped into saving him. He also seemed to have kept his virginity up to this point. I mean I am sort of glad they have a reason to why Cyril a virgin is able to make Lilith a succubus feel good, but it's still pretty stupid in my opinion. I still don't really get why Lilith ends up keeping Cyril at the end, but I guess it's better than letting a yandere angel run around for a bit. Always cool to see a yandere angel though since that's not something you'd normally see in this scenario. Yandere demons seem to be more common and for good reason.

Anyways, hopefully you enjoy this oneshot. The artwork in it is pretty loose so I could get away with the cleaning easier. The fonts kind of irked me because the original Chinese I was basing it off of uses way too many different fonts.

[chronicallyblyrie]

Tmagp 18 live thoughts, spoilers ahead!

Alright let's go I'm ready hit me with it

- TEDDYYYY

-teddy what's wrong my boy

- Alice I don't think he's trying to get with the oiar workers

-WEIRD IN A HOT WAY??

-im with Alice teddy definitely has an obsession with Sam fr

-stalk him.

-lmao Lena trying to socialize like a normal person is lovely

-Sam be glad she doesn't talk to you more

-yes, ask.

-THAT MAKES SENSE VABANSNA

-WH AGUSTUS??

-oh uh corpse description nice

-what.

-WHY ARE MORE CORPSES TALKING

-holy shit IS IT THE SAME GIRL OR A SIMILAR VICTIM??

-SHES RECITING A STORY TOO WTF

-oh my god old house?? Too many rooms? Getting lost?? SPIRAL??

-Church street?? Why does that sound familiar

-holy shit why does his voice sound so much more real

-uhh clouds?? Lonely?? This is insane

-this is giving the house from the lonely domain in season 5, laced with fog? Can't find your way out??

-oh uhh the house is inside you? Why are you eating wood bro??

-SOME FIGURE ASKING QUESTIONS IN AN ALLEY?? WHAT??

-this is more disturbing than the others wowie

-UMMMM THIS IS SO LONELY CODED WTF

-UDBWKDB HIS VOICE WAS SO REAL THEN IT WENT STRAIGHR ROBOT AT THE END UFBWJSMA

-TRAPPED IN GREATEST FEAR?? BRUH WHAT IS THIS

-alice he's trying to help respectfully stfu and listen to him

-OH MY GOD ALICE INTERACT WITH THE HORRORS MORE FOR THE PLOT

-gwen what's up girly

-you sound depressed

-tell them about the monsters.

-Gwen tell them about mr.bonzo and his reading skills

-"like the monsters?" Yes, exactly

-SAM SHES NOT JOKING

-oh okay she's crying oh

-WOAH GEORGIE WAIT WHAT WHATWHAT d hamw

-UMM JUMPSCARE

-BABYYY oh my god the fictional baby sounds so cute

-HOLY SHIT WHAT

-I AM ABOUT TO CRY I MISSED GEORGIE SO MUCH

-"I'm not!" *lying glitch sound effect*

-celia is not a government spy georgie she's just from another universe

- yes she goes outside in her pajamas quite frequently

BRUH THAT WAS FUCKING WILD

okay so georgie doesn't remember anything from the past that's evident, celia definitely does though and she has to remember georgie for sure. We got Augustus again and WOW he sounds like such a real voice it's insane, they're obviously not text to speech voices like that's just proven by now. We also know Teddy isn't dead but he's avoiding texting alicenfor some reason. Gwen is on the verge of a mental breakdown, Colin is still MIA, Sam is just confused all the time, Lena is bring Lena, and Celia is still waking up and almost dying by roads and train tracks. Wowie.

[lunarspiral1127]

X-Men 97 episode 5 *SPOILERS*

The interviews

The reporter seemed nice and doesn't act like a typical controversial one. And, seeing Beast blush was adorable. But, Scott's interview was a doozy. What he said when he lashed out, well....he ain't wrong. I just thought Magneto would be the one to say those things, not Scott. Still, not wrong.

Jean/Scott/Madelyn/Logan drama

UGH! I hate love triangles that bring out so much stress and drama. And, I'm worried that Jean and Scott will break up because of the crap Mr. Sinister pulled. I wasn't expecting Jean to kiss Logan, and it was HIM who told her to go talk to Scott. Despite his feelings, he's still trying to be respectful to their relationship. But, seriously, Jean, why did you kiss him?!

Then apparently, Scott and Madelyn were checking up on each other telepathically, which I get why Jean would be mad at that. But, Madelyn during her time at the mansion WAS Jean and Scott thought that was her! They're the same! At least they were? Then again, they're in contact for a month and Jean kissed Logan once....UGH! I hate this drama. SINISTER THIS IS ALL YOUR FAULT!!!

Genosha

Beautiful. It was a paradise for mutants. They deserve this. The gala looked pretty, I liked the statues of Charles and Magneto, I was not expecting the Hellfire Club to be a part of this council cause I don't trust them (especially the crap they pulled in the previous show). Lots of cameos from other characters that I couldn't keep track on, but the place was lovely. It's a shame though on what happened later on....

Nightcrawler

This lovely, precious German Christian man. 🥰 I love Nightcrawler and I'm glad to see him in this show. The original voice actor who played him in the previous show still does a great job voicing him. And, he approves of Gambit and Rogue (adopted sister) being together, so that's extra bonus points. He got a new look compared to his previous one, but I still like it. Then when the massacre happened, I was so worried that he was gonna die. Thank goodness he survived, but I hate seeing him so hurt.

Gambit/Rogue/Magneto drama

I hate this love triangle SO MUCH! We get an explanation on how Rogue and Magneto got together, and I'm questioning how old she was when they first met and whether Magneto was influencing her in a bad way. Either way, still don't like this ship. Even when them dancing looked good animated, I STILL don't like it. Plus, it still doesn't make sense cause they've been against each other in the previous show, where there was no signs of the two having that past relationship.

Anyway, I'm glad Rogue finally told Gambit the truth, and I feel so bad for him. But, he knew what she wanted and how much it hurt, even going as far as to distance himself, which he showed a lot of emotional maturity, so respect to that. But, that thing where he'll lead Genosha if Rogue stays as his "queen"? DA FUQ?! Look, I like Magneto, but I did not like that. Still wish Rogue could've gotten one of those collars to nullify her powers so that she can touch Gambit. Would've solved a lot of drama, just saying.

I was SO relieved though, that Rogue said that he was right, and rejected Magneto, but I wish she could've done that without kissing him right where Gambit can see it. Either way, it seemed like she'll choose Gambit and not stay with Magneto in Genosha, THANK GOD!

So, you think this would be the end of that love triangle right? Well, yes and no? Cause what happened afterwards hurt like hell.

Genosha Massacre

So, a giant Master Mold thing showed up, killing mutants and destroying Genosha. It was cool seeing Cable again trying to stop it and seeing his mom after so long, which is a glimmer of hope but I'll get to that later. So, many people died. Sebastian Shaw, Calypso, Banshee, Marrow, pretty sure that was Dazzler or Moira not sure, and three more that hurt me so much.

Magneto. Okay, I may not like that love triangle, but I didn't hate the guy. Dude was fighting that Sentinel with a train as a whip, that was pretty cool. And, he tried to protect the Molocks. He tried to protect Leech! He got Rogue and Gambit out of the way. What hurt the most was he told Leech not to be afraid IN GERMAN! Again, didn't want him to die. Although, I wished he could've used his magnetism to push the Molocks away like he did with Rogue and Gambit, but nope. They all died!

Leech. Precious innocent Leech. He was just a kid, man! And, he got to hang out with other mutants his age. He was making friends. Only for this to happen. And, not a lot of people talk about Leech and what happened to him. But, I liked him, and that hurt.

And, finally, the one that hurt the most.....Gambit.....Remy.

He went out like a hero. He sacrificed himself to destroy that Sentinel from killing even more mutants. "The name's Gambit, mon ami. Remember it." Well, now we know why this episode is called Remember It, cause it was Gambit's last words. And, if that wasn't enough, Rogue holding onto him, crying over his body, finally able to touch him....only to not feel him.

THAT. FREAKING. HURT. SO. BAD!!! 😭 Gambit was one of my favorite X-Men characters, and I legit was crying seeing that end. It really hurt to see that happen to him, but at least he went out saving people. However! There is that slight glimmer of hope! Cable. He tried to go back to stop this, who's to say he won't try again? Time travel shenanigans will happen and he can team up with Bishop and the rest of the X-Men to prevent this from happening. It happened many times before, it can happen here. And, maybe, just maybe, Gambit, Leech, Magneto, and all those people won't have to die. This may the denial talking, but I'll be so pissed if Gambit's dead and he Rogue won't be together for good anymore, cause that would be bullcrap.

God, how am I gonna be okay when we're getting Storm and Forge vs. The Adversary next week?! And, jeez, if things keep up like this, Storm is gonna return to the whole mansion on fire. I can't imagine what her and everyone's reactions are gonna be when they find out about Gambit and even Magneto.

Anyway, good episode. Much better than last week's. Now, if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go find a way to cope from all of that.

[zincbot]

hit tag limit uhoh

mario movie made me emotional more at 10

[gcantread]

August 2024 reads

[loved liked ok nope dnf bookclub*]

My Lady Jane • The Wild Robot • Our Hideous Progeny • The Hero and the Crown • The Screwtape Letters • The Seventh Veil of Salome • Our Shouts Echo • Villette • The Lies of Alma Blackwell • The Mercy of Gods • Mistress of Lies • Lady Macbeth • Go to Hell • Lucy Undying

I read 14 books in August! (Well, ok, I'm on track to finish the last two today.) It was a busy reading month for me due to tons of ARCs and new releases (8/14 of this list!), which resulted in an "all my library holds are ready at once ougsfshfh" situation. I also once again checked out a few books in order to see if they're worth reading in future years of @bellasbookclub.

My Lady Jane ★★★☆☆ - A very silly time that often reads more like upper-middle-grade than YA. A skip for TV show fans, but the tween furry community should be overjoyed.

The Wild Robot ★★★★★ - An adorable (and yet surprisingly death-y) kids' book that (🤞) should make a fantastic movie. The illustrations alone bump this one up a few stars.

Our Hideous Progeny ★★★★☆ - The last (?) of my BBC Summer Reading Challenge 2024 picks! Has a slow start but man, if you give me an undead abomination plesiosaur who is also a cute little guy, I am seated. Could have been a five star read if it were just a lil gayer and more Creature-forward!

The Hero and the Crown ★★★☆☆ - Read this one to screen it for @bellasbookclub, so I shan't say any details (yet.)

The Screwtape Letters ★★★☆☆ - Another BBC screening but nope nah I'm not gonna make us read The Christianity Book. Did not make me repent of my godless Jezebel ways even a little bit, but gets three stars because it's nevertheless a fascinating glimpse of C.S. Lewis as a person. Next time I'll stick to The Good Place though.

The Seventh Veil of Salome ★★★★1/2 - Speaking of godless Jezebels: Silvia Moreno-Garcia and I have the same biblical blorbo!! I haven't loved any of Moreno-Garcia's work since Mexican Gothic, but finally, this one was another slam dunk for me! As a Salome (1893) enjoyer and understander I'm so glad SMG is one of us. The main (Hollywood Golden Age) parts were also deftly rendered—this was the first truly well-executed Karen Villain I've encountered.

Our Shouts Echo ★★★★☆ - A really sweet and enjoyable contemporary YA coming-of-age + romance that somehow pulled off its nuanced optimism without being preachy or precious. Dare I say...actual hopepunk? An ARC from ALA Annual.

Villette ★★★☆☆ - Another book club screening. [Helga voice] I hated this book but I loved this book but I hated this book but I loved this book. Dammit, it's just so memeable. See you in hell 2025 probably

The Lies of Alma Blackwell ★★★1/2☆ - A decent YA ghost story with immaculate creepy, witchy, & haunted house vibes and some fun tropey romance (sure, why not?) Another ARC.

The Mercy of Gods ★★★★☆ - Ensemble-driven alien invasion story in which a team of wet babygirl science geeks must prove their worth to their new Giant Fucked Up Bug overlords and also one of them is a parasitic hivemind but we don't know which. Unsinkable concept but the writing makes it even better. One for the grown up Animorphs kids (Yes I know I rated it less than Wild Robot, but Wild Robot is a 5-star quality kids' book, while Mercy of Gods is an imperfect but riveting adult novel that I connected with on a more personal level.)

Mistress of Lies ★★★☆☆ - 2nd-to-last in my self-imposed (Review-) Bombed Books Week Challenge. A generous rounding up to three stars because I like the concept and it had a strong start before...plateauing for 200 pages. (Where were the titular LIES?) Very little actually happened and yet my laconic review is somehow "do less."

Lady Macbeth ★★★★☆ - More of an original story with some names in common than a retelling (Macbeth fans be forewarned. Y'all remember the dragon? You know, the dragon that's in Macbeth?) I tired of how repetitive the assault-as-motif became, but there were some very cool plot choices and Ava Reid's prose is gorgeous as ever. Kind of Green Knight vibes!

Go to Hell ★★★1/2☆ - Another ARC, this one a nonfiction travel guide to IRL destinations that are either associated with Hell/underworld mythology or just hellish places in general. Taught me a lot more folklore and history than your average travel guide!

Lucy Undying ★☆☆☆☆ - Hilarious of me to read two retellings in a row. Unlike Macbeth, I feel deep personal affection for Dracula, which meant this book wold have made me silver_linings_playbook.gif it out the window if I hadn't been reading on my phone. If I had never read Dracula, I miiiight have liked this? (jk I finished it and can now definitively say I would not have.) The prose was decent and I liked Lucy's modern-day love interest, Iris, but this author clearly graduated from the "lesbians must hate and deride all men all the time and be proven right in this view when every single man tries to harm them" school of writing sapphic characters, and since the book was basically encouraging me to paranoid-read, it set off both my "clumsy writing" and "...is this a t3rf?" alarms. tl;dr Mina and Jonathan and Van Helsing and Seward and Arthur and Quincey and Berserker the wolf and even Mr. Swales (slandering Mr. Swales?? Is nothing sacred??) deserved SO much better. Now I'll have to reread Dracula to cleanse myself

DNFs: None! Although Lucy Undying certainly tried my patience.

August superlatives

Next up:

September is another new release-filled month! I'm on track to finish my Bombed Books Week Challenge with The Empire Wars by Akana Phenix and then the unreleased Crown of Starlight itself, so I can satisfy my intellectual curiosity of how it compares to the books its author tried to sabotage. (Which attempted sabotage was an abhorrent action I 100% condemn. Toss aside those large rocks, I've been supporting the targeted authors at my local bookstore and library.)

In less dramatic goals, I've got an ARC of Ruin Road by Lamar Giles I'm eager to check out, and I can't wait for Long Live Evil to be ready at the library. We've also got our first official Bella's Book Club read of Season 3, which should be fun (hint: it's an Austen!)

previous months:

july

[takerfoxx]

Well, it's been a full week since Gundam: The Witch From Mercury has ended, and God, I miss it already.

This was a special show to me, and no joke, it might have made my top five anime of all time. There was just something wonderful about getting invested in a series while it was still running and tuning in week by week and having time to really digest what I've seen before the next episode hit. Granted, I marathoned all of season one and only checked it out because of the SLAP, but even so. It was a wild ride.

And not in the least because wow, a canon wlw couple in a massively mainstream franchise like Gundman, one that ends up getting unambiguously married, and it's not treated like a joke, not played for fanservice, and doesn't portray one of them as a horny molester. That is kind of huge and groundbreaking. And yeah, I am ride or die for SuleMio. They're like number two of my favorite anime couples, second only to KyoSaya, and they actually have the advantage of bursting out of the subtext into undeniable TEXT.

What's funny is that I remember being a little put off by their dynamic in season one. Despite all the hype, there was this weird distance between them, one that was very unromantic, to the point where I started to wonder if they even liked each other in that way, or if it was just a political thing. But then they had their WONDERFUL zero gravity argument, where it was revealed that this was actually a deliberate writing choice, and Suletta and Miorine's differences in backgrounds, ways of thinking, toxic upbringings, and difficulties communicating were going to be obstacles that they had to overcome. And watching them struggle with those problems and make multiple mistakes was honestly far more captivating then a cliched lovey-dovey relationship would have ever been. And seeing them finally come together and get their happy ending was well worth the wait.

But even beyond the main couple, this show fucked. The mech fights were all hype, everything was gorgeously animated, all the side characters were all unique and likeable (seriously, I was making an effort to remember everyone's names, even the throwaway characters with barely any lines), the music was OUTSTANDING (Red: Birthmark still gives me chills) and I still hold that Lady Prospera was not only one of the best and most interesting antagonists in a long time, but she is still one hundred percent Grade A Space MILF.

Still would.

Did it have it's problems? Of course it did. I agree that the last few episodes did feel really rushed, with stuff like the Calibarn and the big space laser suddenly showing up and being super important despite never even being mentioned. All the names of the different organizations were hard to keep track of, even though it was really important to the plot, and there was a lot going on that I felt could have stood to have room to breathe. Honestly, I don't know why WFM only got half the usual amount of episodes for a Gundam show, as it could really used a few more.

And yes, I would have loved to have seen the wedding and a kiss. I know, it's Japan, and Gundam doesn't usually have kissing, but after all that build up!

Still, what we got was still wonderful, and I'm glad that for as shaky as it got, it still stuck the landing.

I'm gonna miss this show. I'm really gonna miss it.

[alpimerealmsystem]

You Can Recover

ED recovery is the best thing I've ever done. I've struggled with orthorexia and then anorexia almost my entire life, it only got severe about a year ago though. About 4 months ago my best friend and honorary sibling more or less forced me to recover. It's been a long journey to say the least. 

When I started recovery I thought I'd never be able to go back to eating normally. My brain would always be running as a calculator. It still is, I can tell you a rough estimate of how many calories I've eaten today and tell you how many cups of cereal is in a bowl because I've measured my food so many times. It still hurts, but now? I'm not obsessively looking for calorie menus of places, and if I can't find one I'm not trying to calculate every thing that went into it.

ED recovery has been one of the most mentally challenging things I've put myself through, but my life has improved so much. Here are some of my favorite things about recovery

I just went to a family dinner and didn't make all the food because I needed to know the calories (still had to make some cause food allergies but y'know)

Choosing the foods I like, not the healthy or low cal versions

CARBS CARBS CARBS (speaks for itself)

I'm not a bitch cause I'm hungry all the time

My periods? They're regular now, I'm not skipping four months at a time (tmi BUT DAMN)

I'm not lightheaded cause I didn't eat and my vision isn't blurring because I didn't eat LIKE THATS AMAZING

SUGAR SUGAR SUGAR

Eating when I want, not what the clock says

I have gone 2-3 weeks without weighing myself (I EVEN LOST TRACK WHICH IS A HUGE DEAL) AND I DONT PLAN TO WEIGH MYSELF TOMORROW

The number on the scale doesn't equal my happiness, I am not mad because I gained 0.2 pounds

I've gained 20 pounds BUT IM HAPPIER WITH MY BODY I love my squishy stomach and back rolls and cellulite and chonky face because it means I am not starving

I don't feel worthless because I'm "too heavy" or "not pretty"

I don't have to buy new clothes every two weeks because my old ones were way to big <3

I'm no longer trying to make sure others see me eat so they don't worry

KEEPING MY STUPID ED BLOG A SECRET (god glad those days are over)

And so much more. Recovery is possible. Recovery is the best thing that happened to me. I know you may be struggling, but it gets better. Everything's not hopeless, even if it feels like it is. Feel free to DM me if you need support or send an ask ^^

I love you, for everything you think is a flaw, for everything you hate about yourself, no matter what it is.

[mylittleredgirl]

m*a*s*h season three continues!! disc two!!

"alcoholics unanimous" is so funny oh my god

the scene where trapper, hot lips, and hawkeye are all lit and making each other laugh is note perfect i want to live in it forever. i can't decide if "who was that guy?" was scripted or if loretta swit just went for a one-shot kill after the scene was over but i live for these bits when margaret accidentally ends up on team 100 proof

it's also nice of them to periodically remind us that frank has a huge wang. i'm glad he's got that one thing going for him

they're really softening hot lips this season 💕

they're styling her much younger, too. the barrettes! the ponytails!!!! i might never recover from the ponytails.

and the scene where she is reading a that letter to radar while he's in the hospital, and she has that little giddy smile at the end! it's so sweeeeeet it's killing me come on

i have a lot of thoughts about frank and margaret, and like five of them are about the phone call in the nurses episode

"knowing you'd kill me makes my life worthwhile" see. with the laugh track off, this joke turns into just margaret staring dreamily in soft focus and the realization that ohhhh. oh no. she really means that. she's like in love in love with this clown, that's so embarrassing for her

(also from that episode: the afterlife song is stuck in my head! the nurse song with the halfhearted montage though like. what happened in the editing room there.)

(also hilarious that trapper misses his wife for the first and only time when every woman in the camp is gone)

"adam's rib" - i like how everyone universally thinks hawkeye's quest is dumb, but they climb aboard the shenanigans because they have nothing else to do

WE LIED TO MILDRED!!!

i don't think i've mentioned how much i love henry and radar together. their comic timing is flawless. that bit of talking over each other never gets old. and then whenever they love and defend each other!!! i love a professional substitute dad

time for "bombed"!!! blow that pyrotechnics budget babyyyyy! blow shit up! break windows! light stuff on fire!!

the trapper/hot lips ship watch on this blog turned into a ship warning just in time for the two of them to get locked in a supply tent and not bang

you gotta admit the long-running ust potential here is pretty great (they hate each other) (but he's a little obsessed about hating her) (and she lusts after him) (and they're both hot)

SADLY for my cause there was no booze in there, because every time she gets drunk she's like "regrettably, there's frank" but sober she wants to marry him

no wonder he wants to outlaw alcohol in the camp

"we held hands and said the pledge of allegiance together" okay they are genuinely so funny sometimes though

i'm also falling hard for hawkeye/trapper but they would never be exclusive so multishipping is built in

last on the disc is "bulletin board"!!!

an episode about nothing is so soothing after all the explosives. the balance of action and Just Hanging Around in this series is really enjoyable

trapper writing a letter to his daughter 🥺

"korea? the war still?" and the rest of that little pillow fight scene. so much sibling energy in the swamp.

henry losing that patient hit well. i hate to be like "i'm rooting for patients to die" because it's not that, but they save them so successfully that it's dramatically satisfying whenever they don't. and i like how it silently affects henry through the rest of the ep while the rest of them have fun

that long beautiful shot of all of them running back to camp!!!!

ok this post took me like three days to write somehow because i rewatched everything ENJOYYYYYY

[littlegermanboy]

Who on earth is jeff. I’m curuous

OH I AM SO GLAD YOU ASKED. jefferson (jeff) arthur callivan is my character for a dnd campaign i'm in run by my dear friend edgar. he's a half elf rogue (which i did not know was a stereotype until like. a few weeks ago. i made him over a year ago) who is a journalist from a small tight-knit poor family of incredibly awesome people, including his hot awesome cool battlemaster fighter mother charmona callivan, his deeply bald and unserious alchemist artificer step-dad leobald callivan, and his incredibly strange wild magic sorcerer (half) sister bones callivan (bones isn't her real name) (she is also another player character) as well as his gay slut wood elf circle of shepards druid dad mellavi who has like. hundreds of children and loves them all dearly and is present in every single one of their lives. he's my favorite npc in the campaign i love him so much.

his plot relevant back story is that his family was struggling with bills and such and he was approached by this guy karsis valker to do work for him involving doing research on certain people, which jeff thought was extremely sketch but the money was too good to refuse so he took the job but he later found out that his work was being used to murder people wanted by this organization called the children of amity which is currently run by religious zealots largely worshiping the god of nature and creation (though it wasn't always like this, it used to be a peaceful organization). so jeff is obviously shocked and disgusted and quits his job and then after that things happen that i can't post about here bc it's backstory secret spoilers for my friends who are playing with me but it traumatizes jeff so badly he takes his sister and runs away to a different continent to try and find the last person he was assigned to research (isaac turner, another player character) to warn him that the children are after him. i could get into more about the children and what they do but that's not 100% relevant here but the plot of the campaign is that the characters are working with a rebel organization trying to take down the children of amity

anyway jeff carries a lot of guilt for being apart of so many peoples' murders as well as for what happened after they quit their job to an extent that's definitely past being helpful and is only self destructive. they haven't told anyone they're close to what happened which was very much the worst option they could have chosen because it's something they Need to know but because of how traumatizing it was for jeff they're horrified that people will blame them for what happened and that they won't be forgiven, and they also haven't told them because they think that it'll protect them in some way.

currently in-game his sister bones is very upset at him for not telling him what's going on, his parents (mom & step-dad) are tracking the two of them down because after he and bones left home they found out what happened to jeff and are extremely worried about their children, and jeff recently found out that his dad mellavi was a member of the children of amity when they were basically a peaceful bible study for their god who he also worships but he wasn't able to leave once they were taken over by zealots bc they kill people who leave because of how small and secretive it is and he wanted to protect his family so he joined the rebel organization as a spy to still help resist against them, but he recently left both organizations which is very concerning to jeff because one massive thing about him is that he loves his parents more than anything and his dad is his biggest role model.

but anyway yeah tldr jeff is my sweetie pie who loves his family and loves his friends and will do anything for them and is very deeply unhappy right now. but i love him. i could probably say more about him but i'll leave it at this for now. if you ever have any more questions about jeff please feel free to ask he's my specialest he/they ever.

(art on the left is his combat mini drawn by edgar @graciouswings, art on the right is mine)

[amysgiantbees]

NOT ME (Spoilers)

God I love it. Hate that it's a hyper-fixation though ATM. WTF am I doing not sleeping over a fucking QL. Everyone cross your fingers that one day I get some fucking meds JESUS

Onto the point:

Love the characters

Everyone can cry SO well! So easy for crying to be awkward or fake looking. But instead they have the jack pot of criers across the whole cast. INSANE

Gun Atthaphan Phunsawat I love you (if they've done anything problematic in their personal life I retract this statement but you could not pay me to give a shit or keep up with actors personal lives so IDK) Goddamn. In the first few episodes I was like, surely Black will be in the coma forever or die because this man can't be scary. He's so perfectly meek and gentle. Then BAM there he comes playing Black PERFECTLY with such intensity! Incredible! They're so nuanced and different.

Screaming for Dan to tell Yod they were threatening his parents. Which by the way ARE HIS PARENTS OKAY???????? Go check on them sir.

Love Tod. I knew in two or three episodes that you were the bad guy but still had fun watching you be rich and slutty with your tits out as I waited for White to catch up. Wonder what his parents are like.

It makes me sad that Black left the gang. I get he doesn't want to be in White's shadow and is FIERCELY independent but I feel like he and White are meant to be together. Or at least in each other's orbits. You have a literal preternatural twin connection. Take it as maybe a sign you should stay together. Also, useful to know when the other is hurt. I'm surprised that there was so little rushing to save the other, especially when Black was being drowned. Black is also SIGNIFICANTLY less feral when White is around. You're good for each other.

Absolutely love that even without anyone else's influence White still isn't a complete saint. He lies and loves to cheat. Much like Black is at first overwhelmingly angry and violent but there's depth and care there clearly as you go. I find it so fascinating that Black, the most aggressively for the cause out of the two arguably, is the one that's friends with Tod. I think that's such a rich dynamic and if there's a second season I'd love for it to be further explored. Also love that White's intelligent and sensitive. Him toughening up doesn't involve him repressing his feelings. More characters (men in particular) should cry.

God it's amazing to have a show seriously engage in leftist theory. Have characters disagree, argue, explain, be intersectional. Usually shows will just have one leftist character that's the but of the joke, or there's a character that's supposed to be leftist but their opinions are so shallow, milk-toast, and surface level either no one could take them seriously or they're not even leftist. It's a breath of fresh air. I liked that the characters weren't perfect in their ideologies but realistically flawed without mocking leftism. It felt like real leftists, some who occasionally have more rage than sense but they're all on the right track.

Loved how Tawi felt like a real business man. He wasn't mustache twirling he was laser focused and if diplomacy was the solution he was going to take it. He was such a realistic slime ball. Rich people do things like hire disabled staff or other positive actions, but Yok's right it's either for publicity or the other harm that they're doing is cancelling that out. The way he'd call staff "family" without finding new jobs for them. So realistic, loved to hate him. Would love to see a second season where he goes to trial or Tod assassinates him.

Absolute slut for art being integral to the plot and not only that the inherent political nature of art.

So glad Dan quit. ACAB. Hope he quits NFT's while he's at it.

Love intelligent women and all but what do you mean Eugene knew the whole time? Then why didn't you confront Black about it before now. That just seemed silly. I liked her figuring it out on her own but she didn't need to have known always.

White and Sean's sex scene still made me uncomfortable. I get he got as far as he could to telling the truth but maybe don't have sex yet then. It's technically rape to lie about who you are.

I wish the women were slightly more involved in the story. Or that there was a second season where they were all a part of the gang (except Nuch. Love her but I can't see her ever joining an illegal organization). Namo already seems like she might have been to the hideout before and Eugene figured it all out on her own. Let them join! They'd be great. Or I could see Nuch, Namo, Gene, Dan, and whoever is writing that news blog being the face of the gang. Organising protests and have lot's of B plots as they have their own group. Community is so important especially in anarchy media.

More episodes in general would have been great. Would have loved to dive into Black more. I think it's really interesting that he's taking law. I wonder if his mother pressured/molded him to follow in her footsteps like their dad did with White? Or if law was his choice. Or if it's both (although he does canonically skip classes a lot, but that could be his rebelliousness or ADHD - I'd love to see more disability rep) I'd love to know more about the breakdown between Tod and Black. How Black got more radicalized. If it was their mother's fault.

I'd love a second season where they get some charges and have to grapple with the legal system. White and Black's dad tries to make it go away to save face. Some people are for him getting them out (or just getting the twins out and letting the others take the blame), live to fight another day style. Some want a trial even if it's unfair for the principle of the thing. Gram might try to defend himself. If he did Nuch would absolutely tell him he's an idiot and then help him.

Would love to have seen or see in a season 2 them advocating for disability rights. Maybe even having a disabled cast member. There was no mention of a disability petition at the protest and it felt somewhat unsatisfactory to end Yok's mother's story with "she has a nice boss now". I'd really love if that was the next issue they tackled. They could have an interpreter at the protest. I'd also love to see one supportive parent. If they could convince her that ROL is cool. Or at least get her to attend a protest, meet up with other sign language users.

I'd also love to know about Gumpa's history. I really feel like the kidnapping was new for him but otherwise he's seen some shit. I wonder if he was part of a group too and what happened to them.

[emmy-dekarios-bg3]

Heart of the Weave (Part 2)

*This is a sequel to my OG Fic Heart of the Weave on AO3. Only read part 2 if you've read my first fic*

Chapter 3

“Alright mother, are you sure you don't need anything else before we go? Both girls have been fed and changed, but in case they're hungry, their bottles are on the counter and Neeve has some chicken and carrots –”

“Gale, my boy, I need nothing else. You are such a wonderful father! Please, go. You two have fun. Tara also knows their schedules in case I forget. Which, you know me, protective grandmother alert.” Gale and I both smile as we turn to leave, closing the door behind us. It's such a delight having Morena around, and I've loved having to get tea with her every tenday. Gale will join us on occasion also, but not every time, which gives us time to connect more since my mother is basically out of the picture now. 

Gale laces my fingers within his as we stroll to the Waterdeep docks nearby, where the outdoor eatery awaits us, as well as our friends. The orange aura of the sunset glows around us as we approach the docks, feeling the warmth embrace us.

“A night out with my wonderful wife, what could be better than this?” Gale comments, kissing my knuckles. “I always cherish these moments and I will for eternity.”

“You said it, my love. Mmm…fish sounds good. Maybe some oysters. GODS! Oysters… I don't even remember the last time I had them.”  Gale stops walking, stopping me in my tracks with his hand, our fingers still intertwining. “What is it?”

“We have been together for almost six years and I'm just now finding out you love oysters. Waterdeep has the best but that should be obvious considering we do have the best seafood around.” 

“With how often I fart, I figured it wouldn't be the best idea to eat them around you.” Gale busts out in laughter, fighting tears at my comment, knowing damn well it's true. “I do my best to hold them in.”

“Trust me, sweetheart, I'm not judging.” We make it to the restaurant, immediately noticing Astarion and Shadowheart because they both have vibrant white hair that's noticeable from several feet away. And, well, they're elves – everyone else here is either a tiefling, orc, or human. We wave and approach them, sitting down at the table in their company.

 “There you are! About time you showed up, Shadowheart’s stomach won't quit growling,” Astarion teases. “I’m kidding. I turned her into a vampire, she only drinks blood.” Shadowheart playfully elbows him in the ribs. “What? Were they not supposed to know, my sweet?”

“Don't listen to him. We got here early to beat the crowd. I bet you two are glad to be out of the house, huh?” Shadowheart takes a long drink of her red wine, gulping it down like water. Wait, is it red wine? I study the thick red liquid inside, which stains her lips like blood would; he did turn her into a vampire, which explains how she became immortal. Interesting. 

“Glad we could make it. We've missed you both, even though we just saw each other yesterday. Gale’s mom is at home with the girls, and she seemed beyond excited to be there.” Shadowheart finishes off her glass, looking more than just satisfied as she places it back down on the table. “I’ll break the silence. Are you a vampire, Shadowheart?”

“It's that obvious, huh?” Gale and I nod simultaneously. “Astarion is trying to get me to control my thirst better, yet it's so hard. I don't know what I'm doing.”

“That's why I'm here for you every step of the way, my darling. Just control the urge to attack anyone. Please. Ha, six years ago no one would ever hear those words escape my mouth,” Astarion adds as he leans back in his chair and crosses his arms. The waiter approaches, handing us our drinks and takes our order. I did end up ordering the oysters, and I'm pretty excited to try them. 

“Oysters? Really? Grotesque,” Astarion comments, and once again Shadowheart elbows him in the ribs. “Darling!”

“Says the one who drinks blood,” Gale retorts with a smirk, wrapping his arm around me. “Only jesting, my friend.” I sit here in silence for a moment, realizing that our friends are immortal just like us, but their son will age…just like Neeve. It also hits me that she will get to grow up with Asher and Maddox, which will be somewhat comforting in the long run.

“So, how do you both cope? Knowing your son will age but you won't?” I ask, my voice soft so it can't be overheard.  “Has it crossed your mind at all?” I can sense Gale turning his head to look at me, and he probably didn't realize this was bothering me on occasion. I know he thinks about it too, but he tries his best not to. 

“Well, we try not to think about it. We haven't really coped with the thought really,” Shadowheart adds, a hint of sadness in her voice. “It wasn't something I considered, and that's selfish on my part. But also, who knows what the future holds, you know? Life is full of unexpected surprises. You both know that.”

“To add to that, your daughter Neeve could have the same situation Jenevelle did. Whichever devil has that crown could be destroyed just as easily as Raphael was. And your daughter, well, she has the Weave. Right?” Astarion has a point. Why overthink this at all when the future is uncertain? “Now, let's not think about such a devastating topic and drink to our heart’s desire!” 

  After a couple glasses of wine – okay, four glasses – the night did end up rather fun, and even Gale was tipped over the edge a little with the drinking. I’ll admit, it's been a long time since I've been able to do this. I did end up performing in front of the crowd, a little drunk while doing so, and made some extra gold in the process. Was my music even relatively decent? That part, I can't exactly answer, and neither could our friends. 

 After a long night out of buffoonery and some catching up, Gale and I make it back to the tower after sobering up on the road home, where we find Morena on the couch rocking Jenevelle, who looks wide awake and happy despite the very late hour. It appears Neeve is already in bed. 

  “Oh hello! Did you two have fun? It's very late. And…looks like you had a bit to drink, do my eyes deceive me?” Gale knows his mother isn't a fan of alcohol in the slightest, and she always told him how bad it is, but he hates lying to her. In fact, he refuses to exaggerate the truth in any shape or form. 

 “You are correct but we’re both sober now. I promise all is well,” Gale comments, taking Jenevelle from her arms. “Did the girls give you any trouble?”

 “These girls giving grandma trouble? Pish posh! They were as sweet as my grandmother's apple pie! Neeve crawled around a lot, walked some, but she struggled a little. That little munchkin likes to get into things! Got a hold of some yarn, she did. She played and laughed, I told her a bedtime story, and she went straight to bed with her bottle. Jenevelle? Oh don't even get me started! She just wanted to laugh, kick her feet, and she even rolled over. She laughed at herself and it was the most precious.” Gale and I look at one another, our eyes widened but we both feel a pinch of sadness as Morena speaks.  At least I assume Gale is sad, judging by his melancholy expression. That was the first time Jenevelle has ever rolled over and we missed it…one of the only milestones our forever baby will have. 

“Oh…we missed it,” I murmur, followed by a devastated sigh. “She's never done that before.” Morena frowns and pulls me in for a gentle hug. 

“I'm sorry sweetie. I didn't realize.” Gale lifts Jenevelle up, positioning her in front of him and she's on her belly, one of her favorite activities Gale does with her. She kicks her feet and laughs as she ‘swims’ in the air, but as Gale pulls her back close to him, her butt gets close to his face and he sniffs, making a face of discontent. “Oop! Grandma has to depart. I love you both!”

“Mother! You skipped a diaper change.”

“I'm afraid she just has bad timing, dear. Toodles!” As Morena leaves and closes the door behind her, I laugh lightly and take Jenevelle from Gale’s arms. 

“You don't need to–”

“Love, I've got it. Go relax.” He smiles amorously at me and kisses the side of my head without another word, heading to the babies’ room to kiss Neeve goodnight. I follow him so I can change Jenevelle and get her cleaned up for bed. After she’s cleaned up, I sit down on the mahogany rocking chair and begin nursing her to sleep, which causes Neeve to wake up. She reaches out for me with tired eyes and messy hair, so Gale hands her over and I nurse her as well. As I sit here, breastfeeding both babies, I feel the sudden urge to cry, but in a way of exhaustion and frustration. It feels like this is a cycle that will never end. I plan on breastfeeding Jenevelle until I can't anymore, but only because she's so little. Neeve? She's a baby, yes, but she's beginning to walk.

“You are amazing,” Gale whispers as he observes me feeding both babies, his eyes wide. “Breastfeeding both babies at the same time, loving them tenderly and delicately. It's beautiful.” Neeve sticks her foot in the air, grabbing it as she continues to feed. I continue to fight the urge to cry, but tears escape my eyes anyway. 

“It's exhausting. I hate to say it but I'm ready to wean Neeve, but she doesn't seem to want to stop.” Gale’s smile quickly fades as he notices me crying, so he places his hand on my cheek, using his thumb to wipe away my tears. “Am I wrong for that?”

“Not at all. Your heavy  feelings are valid and she's going to have to stop eventually. I know you love these girls with the entirety of your existence. But you have to do what's best for you also. Neeve can eat solid food and drink milk from a cow. If she wants comfort…cuddle her. Let her know you love her. I think she sees Jenevelle feed and she wants it too.” I take a deep breath, noticing both girls falling asleep, so Gale takes Neeve and puts her back in her crib while I place Jenevelle in hers.

[rocketturtle4]

Not Me eps 8 and 9: I. AM. SCREAMING.

@plantsarepeopletoo @anon451 @shouldiusemyname @thegalwhorants @wen-kexing-apologist @slayerkitty @fanfictionroxs @pandasmagorica

Part 1, Part 2

IT WAS TODD, I KNEW IT!!

and Sean and White got together and Yok and Dan got together and we have two sad ex-girlfriends(ish) and Gram looking on in longing and BLACK WOKE UP and they're all being followed cause Todd knows way more about them now and and and

[Image of Ashi lying on the couch zoned out with the caption: Roc.exe has crashed, please try again later]

(Also yes another update already, it's crazy! Though we're trying to book out a time to watch the last 3 together so that may take a while...or may be this weekend *crosses fingers hopefully* though that may shift watching Only Friends and other Sunday shows to like...Monday or later ahhhh)

Also I did not do a between 8 and 9 update but I totally guessed Dan was the officer who shot Seans dad.

GMMTV does such good foreshadowing and pay off I feel so satisfied and excited by every reveal.

Alright now lets walk through in briefish how amazing these two eps were...

[3 images of Sean and White, one with Sean saying: I'm lucky I met you]

Oh. My. God.

OffGun

SeanWhite

I Love Them.

Every moment of emotional connection, this scene in the bedroom, Sean tracing his body with his fingers the next morning (WHY DID HE TIE HIM UP??)

The rooftop

The trust falls

The KISSES

[Sean saying: I've never known you better than this before]

THIS Moment in the tent?

and then there casual intimacy the next day???

Ugh I am dying and I love it here

(I'm so scared for him to find out, I mean White totally hinted at it but it's going to be a MESS)

And Yok/Dan??

[Images of Yok/Dan from episodes 8 and 9 of not me covering their time in Dan's house being painted, to Yok visiting Dan at work and Dan showing him his first ever artwork and finally to Dan visiting Yok's mother's house and Dan commiting to supporting Yok as best he can]

OH MY GOD I LOVE THEM EVEN MORE

also Wow Gawin!?! I'm glad he got that lead eventually he is phenominal in this. Everyone bringing their absolute A game!

Also Plot! There was plot, Lots of Plot!

We have two heartbroken girls that I really hope we spend more time on cause they have been amazing characters so far. Namo took finding out about Sean and White so well and then she was so sad ugh.

and then Eugene also struggling with her dance routine because she's confused/heartbroken about Black

I'm so curious how that Black/Eugene/Gram triangle may play out now that Black's awake, I mean he still broke up with Eugene because he wanted her safe, and now he's nearly died I doubt that will change...

I have more thoughts on Black but lets back track to Plot again for a minute

Sean and Tawi face off in the bathroom happened

[Tawi telling Sean: Your dad sold drugs and I had nothing to do with him]

Oh and Todd was trying to get back on track with figuring out what the gang is up too in episode 8

[Todd sitting on Black's bed saying: I brought a lot. Aren't you gonna eat first?]

Plus at the end of Ep 9 everyone was being followed...Oh and Sean is now spying on Tawi? Although not a whole lot of actual spying seemed to be happening...

Now I know that Tawi is also big coorporation here but I now have no idea how much of all this is just Todd or is Todd working for/with Tawi? That seems like the most likely scenario but I don't know for sure.

How much was Tawi actually involved in the drug trafficking that Seans father was involved in?

And when/how will Sean find out that officer Dan is the one who shot him? I can already picture the explosion.

And as much as I want (so very desperately) to watch the next episodes. I am also kind of grateful that I have to stop. Because this is SUCH A GOOD POINT to sit and imagine at.

How will Black and White be revealed to their friends? To Sean? To Euguene to everyone. What about Black and Whites parents? Are they going to come back into the story?

(OMG Black's mum, who White is 100% going to meet in his place next ep, will he meet her as White? Or pretend to be Black??)

Also Black's gotta feel betrayed about Todd too. Oh and Paprika's point about Black and White being thought and action, will we get to see them come together now, despite how much Black want's White to stay out of it? Is White going to meet the friends AS WHITE?? (I am dying to have Sean see him all put together with his glasses on). The emotional pay off that I can feel coming is so good, are they going to be shocked and betrayed? are they going to finally understand? I honestly have no idea and I want to know SO MUCH.

But I also just want to sit in this anticipation a little bit longer and let my imagination run wild. Looking forward to it all coming together

Looking forward to the plot too lol!

See you next time, chances are my next installment will be my immediate post finale freakout...or I could takes notes as I go maybe, does anyone want my live reactions, posted non-live?

[Image of First saying: Are you sure?]

P.S. just had a thought as I was adding tags...The gang's gonna think White's a mole aren't they? He's been in contact with Todd, He's the reason they're getting followed. OH NO, they're going to think he's with others.

I WILL Cry. Watchbuddies be warned