#glad he got to team with Grian lol

[yeahiamjustalittleguy]

Thanks!! Could u do a team rancher x dsmp reader where, during the hermitcraft and empires crossover, the reader somehow ends up in either empires or hermitcraft and sees Jimmy and Tango and remembers them from double life (the three of them were soulmates)

A little bit of angst/comfort where reader doesnt want to go back to the dsmp but they have to because dream has them on a wanted poster and he would travel through worlds and destroy them just to find reader and they dont want hermitcraft or empires getting destroyed because of them

CAN I JUST SAY OKAY.... Ranchers are the love of my life. I love them so deeply. I never watched jimmys pov of anything before double life. They got a grasp on me man..

Warnings: Angst, no happy ending and mentions of DSMP which is a horror in itself lol

____________________________________________

The last thing you remembered was the stinging sensation of withering, as you hid in a closed off room in a nether fortress, trying to not die. Then there was purple, and then nothing. It didn’t explain what was happening, but it wasn’t that long since you had entered a new SMP and you knew what that felt like, so you instinctively knew that when you awoke you were somewhere else. In a new world. Truth be told, the revelation came as a welcomed surprise. The DSMP was a hard place and it had never really suited you all that well. Your soul was too soft for it, many had told you. That’s why all your friends and family had been surprised when you had accepted the invitation to the double life server. Although it was more lighthearted than the DSMP, it was still known for violence and bloodshed. You’d never tell them, but you’d give anything to leave the DSMP. You didn’t care what server had invited you, it didn’t matter what double life was, you took the invite in a heartbeat. Turns out double life had been the best experience of your life too. You’d buried the feelings of why, never telling anyone on the DSMP that you’d fallen in love. The server didn’t allow for such weakness, so you buried it all.

You’re in some kind of cave when your mind comes to. It has a bunch of things you’re not entirely sure what are, and to your surprise it also has Grian. You’d known him for a long time, which was originally the reason you had been invited to double life. That’s when you knew where you were. If Grian was here it had to be the server he usually frequented, which was hermitcraft. He was just as surprised to see you as you were to see him. “How.. Am I here?” You had asked him, puzzled. This type of cross server travel was something you’d simply never heard of. The only way to usually go to any other server was through your communicator and only by getting an invite. He walked over to hug you, smiling. You tensed, not being used to positive physical contact. When he pulled away he still had a big smile on his face. “I can’t believe you’re somehow here! I thought the rift was just between hermitcraft and Empires.” He explained, and you raised an eyebrow at his lack of a real explanation. “The rift?” You enquired.

“I accidentally created a rift between servers. I don’t really know how, but I am glad you’re here. This is cool.” He was clearly excited about it, but you were worried. “How do I get back, Grian?” You knew your disappearance would not go over well in your own world. Both because your friends and family would miss you, but also because you knew the lengths Dream would go to just to make sure you stayed chained to your own world. Everyone had their part to play in his schemes, and you were sure your disappearance would somehow ruin his plans and make him go ballistic. Grian looked sad and dejected at the prospect of you not staying, but you had to go. You knew it would only cause trouble if you didn’t. “You can go back and forth through the rift, as long as it stays open. But hey, stay for just a little bit, won’t you? Just to see the server- I could show you so many things!” Once again he seemed excited at the prospect of you staying, just a little bit. 

Maybe a few hours wouldn’t hurt. There was no way that he would notice you gone until later. He wouldn’t even have to know that you’d left. You already knew it was a yes. The temptation of a couple hours of peace and happiness was all too much, and the question had never even been real. Of course you would stay. Grian didn’t even really need to convince you, nodding your head as he grabbed you once again and unfolded his large wings to carry you out of the apparent cave you were in. 

You had fun for a bit, examining Grians base with him. He was about to move on to show what his neighbor, Mumbo, had been working on when his communicator went off a couple of times. He excused himself for a second, checking it with wide eyes. “Wait here, I have to go do something.” He said, about to take flight when you grabbed his arm in panic, surprising both of you. Grian knew you were jumpy, but not this much. He was aware of the changes that the DSMP had done to you, and you had both discussed it in double life. It was hard to deny it with Grian, he had known you before you joined. He knew the person you were before that server changed you completely. He understood why the thought of him leaving you alone was so frightening to you. “I’ll drop you off with someone you know, I promise.” He settled on, and although you were uncomfortable with the idea, you didn’t want to burden him so you nodded, as he once again picked you up to take you somewhere. 

So when he dropped you off with the nearest person, who happened to be Scar, you were even less comfortable. You’d grown to like Scar over the season you had with him but you knew he was not a person equipped to babysit you. It was no surprise that as soon as Grian left Scar first dragged you around his park, but then when that ran out of interest for him you were getting dragged all over the server. Then, somewhere along the way you lost Scar. It was bound to happen with him flying around. He couldn’t carry you like Grian could. For a while you stood still, but it didn’t look like Scar was even looking for you or backtracking. So you decided to start walking, deeply on edge. Then you spotted a structure.

It stopped you in your tracks as you had to decide between trying to get help or finding your way back. After an inner battle, you decided to approach the building. It was black with blue and purple accents, and it was quite beautiful. Everything on this server had been so stunning. Coming from the DSMP it left you speechless sometimes. The only person on the DSMP who ever made anything this substantial was Foolish, and you’d never had the time to simply appreciate his builds. Walking so you were stood right in front of it, you tried to build up the courage to explore it to find help, but you just kept having that feeling in your stomach and the inability to make your legs move. 

But you didn’t need to, as voices started to approach behind you from the treeline. It was starting to get dark out, so it made sense that someone would be coming home at this point, but your brain didn’t register anything except the fact that there were people coming for you. And in a panic, you unsheathe the sword you had borrowed from Grian, turning around quickly in a stance ready to fight as the two people become visible to you, and you to them. And they both stop in their tracks, the cheerful chattering coming to a halt at seeing you. But it’s not fear or surprise on their face, it’s faces of recognition. And the same look comes to your face, as your panic fades completely and warmth crawls up your body and into your cheeks. 

They both shout your name, running towards you, Tango embracing you first and then Jimmy enclosing you both in his arms. “T-tango, J-jimmy.” You say their names shakily, somehow against your own will. It’s like a deep hidden need or urge to say them. The things you did together, the feelings both of them drew from you, it all comes back to you right then and there. Why couldn’t you have stayed in double life forever, with those two? It was cruel, but beautiful. Something in your mind couldn’t stop you from thinking it was fate, that maybe if you were lucky, you would continue to run into them like this. That maybe something would happen, and you could have this forever. But you were not that naive.

Jimmy pulled away, but left his hands on Tangos back. Tango didn’t completely pull away, but he did pull back to grab your face in one hand, tilting it up so he could look at you. His face had a beautiful smile painted on it, but you could see that his eyes were a little wet. Looking towards Jimmy, you almost burst out laughing, seeing him fully sobbing. "Hey! Don’t laugh at me.” He said, covering his face in embarrassment and then wiping his tears away. It was honestly just.. It was a lot, and keeping your tears in yourself had been hard so you couldn’t really pick on him too much. “It was a lot today, seeing both Tango and you for the first time in a while, okay!” He explained, as Tango continued to laugh deep from within his stomach. Feeling his body again, feeling the rumble of his voice leaving his chest, it was beyond any other feeling in the world. You missed it. You had missed it so, so much.

You somehow ended up on a couch after talking for hours, Tango on his stomach against you, both of you once again trapped inside Jimmys’ arms as he laid on his side next to you. He had the longest arms, you’d learned, and so he was always left on big spoon and outer layer cuddle-pile duty. It was hard to feel bad for him, as he looked so content. If you kept playing with his hair, you were convinced you could make him fall asleep. It was something you’d have to test, to be sure. Tango wouldn’t stop turning his head to look up at you, his goofy smile constantly glued to his face. It was perfect. You don’t know which god was playing with you. Giving you this taste of heaven, when you knew it could never last forever. all you would ever get was a little taste, you could never really have the full experience. It would just leave you with a craving that would never be satisfied.

And with Grian and Scar suddenly shouting your name from somewhere outside Tangos’ base, you knew it was time. Jimmy seemed to be pulled out of his half-asleep state, and Tango followed suit, sitting up. You heard Grian calling your name again, this time closer. There was a silence as you all looked between each other, Tango and Jimmy both knowing the look in your eyes. They both knew that look all too well. From when you all lost your first life to the last one, they’d seen it. The eyebrows that pulled upwards and the eyes that glossed over. You were saying ‘I’m sorry’ again. And they knew you were going to leave. 

Desperately, Jimmy latched onto your arms. “No, don’t leave us again. Stay. Just-you can stay! You can stay for as long as I can, right? Tango? They can stay-” You cut him off, knowing you would break if you let him ramble on for any longer and also for his own sake. You knew he would just keep spiraling. “I have to go, Jimmy. Everyone from your world is onboard with you being here but.. I can’t stay. The people from my server wouldn’t..” You stopped to choose your words carefully. You didn’t want Tango and Jimmy to know. You didn’t want them to worry. They didn’t need to know what the DSMP was actually like, it would only hurt them to know. 

“They wouldn’t get it. They would.. Miss me." It wasn’t entirely true, yet not entirely false either. You’re sure Dream would miss whatever plans he had for you, and you’re sure he would tear the entire universe apart to find you. That was more fun, anyways. You don’t know what his intentions are or what plans he has for you, but you’re sure tormenting you and bringing you back on your knees is more fun to him than making a new plan. And you don’t want to test him. You know what the man is capable of. Maybe if you let him take your last two lives, as he had taken the first, you could escape. But even in death Wilbur couldn’t, so you were not hopeful in that regard. You only feared to think what your purgatory would be like. No, instead you would return home. Keep going in the hopes of once again getting to hear Jimmy and Tango laugh.

Tango was taking it well, all things considered. You could tell he was sad, but he at least understood where you were coming from. Jimmy on the other hand was just looking between you and Tango, mad at you for letting yourself leave and mad at Tango for letting you leave. But he sighed, sinking back into the couch and away from you. He looked back up at you in defeat as you heard Grian and Scar call for Tango. You leaned in, putting an ascetic and fast kiss to Jimmys’ lips before taking Tangos’ hand and walking down stairs together. You and Tango both knew that Jimmy would not be able to let you go if he went with you, and Jimmy must have known too as he abstained from following you but simply sat there with tears starting to form in his eyes. 

“Oh, thank goodness you’re okay. It was getting dark and I was worried, I knew I shouldn’t have left you with Scar.” Grian rambled as he ran towards you and hugged you as soon as you and Tango came into his vision. You looked behind him, seeing a very relieved and apologetic Scar waving at you. “I definitely don’t plan on letting Scar babysit my kids.” You said, putting up a joking demeanor to block the pain that was building up inside you. Grian let go of you, stepping back. “I’m sorry it took so long, are you ready to go?” Grian asked, and you grabbed Tangos’ hand. His eyes were glossy and slightly red, but he wasn’t crying. He must have been holding it back well, just like you were. Putting the other hand on his cheek, he copied you and laid his hand on yours and you leaned up to give him a deep and final kiss, which was the goodbye between you two before you parted. 

Grian and Scar were looking at you in surprise as you separated, starting to walk away and when they regained their composure, they followed suit silently, ready to lead you back to the rift. To most, this had just been a fun little game with the idea of soulmates. But to you and your ranchers it had been real, it had meant everything. You just hoped it would not be the last time you ever got to see them.

[inverted-flowers]

So... Those Secret Life tarot predictions I've been doing huh? Well it's Grian's turn! Reminder that you don't really need to know anything about Tarot Cards. If you're curious though it's just a simple 5 card spread I made specifically for this. Also I did this on November 2nd of 2023 (it's a Thursday) cuz I'll probably decide to schedule this as to not spam the tags lol.

First Card - Start

So this card was rough because while I was placing it I turned it without thinking about it (which I like never do). I had to debate whether to interpret it upright (how it would've been had I not turned it) or reversed (how it was when flipped it over). As I said in the very first post, I'm doing these as practice so this is also just a 'well wtf do I do in this situation' sort of milestone. In the end I've decided to interpret it as upright with a kind of side note of reversal... if that makes sense... I'm gonna combine the meanings a little bit!

I drew the Ace of Wands... uh... funky style. (Sure that makes sense right? /silly) This card is describing Grian's start of Secret Life as involving a lot of hard work. There could be some minor setbacks but he'll likely work through them fine enough. He'll probably have a great time, honestly, if this card has any truth to it.

Second Card - Individual

This card is describing how Grian does in the game basically. For it I drew the reversed 8 of Swords. He survives through the more difficult first part of starting in a new life series world. So far he's doing very well too so this is supported! If you've seen his episodes you'll know he's not exactly down a whole lot of hearts yet. This card also talks about being open to change and new opportunities. What new opportunities? I'm so glad you asked. To the next card!

Third Card - Social

This card is meant to describe how Secret Life goes for Grian on the social end of this series. I drew the Death card which made me laugh. The death card is about change, rebirth, and transitioning from one phase to another. My brain immediately went to how everyone and their grandma were drawing comparisons between his first ep with Scar on the camel and third life. This makes me think he's either not going to team up with anyone or if he does it'll be someone he hasn't yet and well... So far it's looking like the former! It makes that lil' comparison extra fun cuz this is saying he'll be putting the past expirences behind for something new.

Fourth Card - Big Impact

I drew the reversed Page of Pentacles which is wild cuz I drew that for Joel too but as his season end. Here I drew it for Grian's 4th card which is describing what makes the greatest impact for him this season. This card talks about a lack of progress and getting lost in the details. He might get too caught up in something and forget about his task.

Fifth Card - End

I drew the 3 of Pentacles for how Grian'll end Secret Life. This card talks about collaboration and learning. He's probably very secure in his beliefs... except that those beliefs might be a strict adherence to the rules which could ultimately cause him more problems than necessary. It also means he could take the advice and criticisms of his fellow players pretty well.

So do I think this reading is predicting Grian to win? Not in the slightest. 3 of pentacles really feeling like a participation trophy here lol. Like 'yay you learned things and got to make content with all these lovely people!' Not exactly something screaming he's gonna win. If I had to take a gander as to how it goes down, I'd reckon he gets distracted and fails a hard task or fails his normal tasks multiple times (based on the 4th card). That would then somehow push him to be more strict with rule following (based on the 5th card). If that is what happens, the fail would probably happen either soon and then affect the majority of his season or later when he's low. Maybe it's what turns him red.

[nerdyenby]

Red time :D I’m watching Grian

Grian sounds so distressed is he okay????

Ah he’s sick, who isn’t though

The rabid rabbits 😂😂😂

Grian ready and willing to slam his head into any and every wall he sees

They were gonna instantly jump into the void in skybattle 😂

“No one expected me to be on time but they were still disappointed when I wasn’t”

Pete calling everyone voting for buildmart cowards, as he should

Buildmart

Manager Grian my beloved!!!!

Their comms are beautiful

I was on the edge of my seat the entire team, no notes lol

“Alright, what do we wanna win next?” I love the energy, king <333

Bingo

How have I not seen H’s chat message before 😂😂😂

The way they know what chiseled sandstone is and how to craft it :))

These guys know minecraft and it makes my heart so happy

YOU CAN KILL THE SHEEP GRIAN 😭😭😭

The way he freaking murdered a cat without hesitation but forgot he can kill a sheep

IT WAS A JELLIE NOOOOOOOO oh Grian is dead

“We’re doing exactly what I said we’re gonna do, which is win” “we’re looking kinda hot right now” RABID RABBIT SUPREMACY!!!!

Gem’s little “I made a house” 😂

“Alright, who’s the weak link?” “Me, I’m the weak link, we know that. Is anyone surprised by this?” “Cleo, get it together please, get it together” “This is me with it together, Gem, you know that!!” This team is my favorite actually

“Don’t forget to donate chat :D” “or else >:(“ “and if you do forget, just remember” THEM

Gem and Cleo my beloveds

Grian crashing and Gem’s “Oh I thought that would be me today, I’m glad it’s you” 😂

TGTTOSAWAF

“How hard do we want to win this?” “Like, super hard” so true Cleo

“Oh no, I haven’t practiced terra swoop force. Joke’s on you, I don’t need to” GRIAN 😂

They popped off!!

“This is supposed to be a fun game” real

Cleo’s reaction to Grian saying it’s Takashi’s castle is so /pos

“You’re doing great!! I mean, you’re doing bad!!” Gem my beloved

The way Grian described everyone grappling onto Phil’s face is killing me

Grian’s sole strategy for this event is overwhelming positivity AS HE SHOULD

“You got this, Grian. Just murder anyone who comes your way and you’ll be fine!!” so true Cleo!!!

Pete and Grian’s banter is everything

Parkour Tag

“If you don’t mind, I’d like to go first” “oh” “I’m not gonna stop you”

This team is so great, they all are just so comfortable with each other but haven’t competed together so they’re just oscillating between merely vibing and absolutely bullying each other

GRIAN’S SOUNDS 😂😂😂

Cleo asking Gem if she’s supposed to be nice or mean to Grian and Pete volunteering to be ridiculed lmao

Grian’s killing it as a hunter!!!!

Pete crafting a master conspiracy to get Grian a fifth hunt lmao

Everyone getting to hunt at least once <333

GRIAN TOP 5?!???!!!

Grian talking about how Scar is going to hate him and then how bad Scar did his first event and then saying “He’s probably watching, hi Scar, hey buddy~”

Grian talking about how much this event reminds him of Techno <333

Ace Race

Grian is so unhinged right now, good for him

“There’s just the gay stuff, it’s fine” CLEO 😂

Only just realizing this is my first time watching this ace race because all the povs I’ve watched so far got muted

“I think I’ve just been lapped” “it’s probably Pete” “Uhhhhh….” 😂😂😂

Cleo telling Pete “You’ve done really good, precious, I’m proud of you” god, am I really deprived enough of affection to get emotional over this? The answer is yes

Grian telling Pete to go jogging to this soundtrack irl 😂

TEN SECONDS ON 2ND?!???

Annnnnnnddd they jinxed it lol

I LOVE confident Grian

“I just don’t want battle box to be last” uh oh…

Sands of Time

I feel like I haven’t seen anyone shoot creeepers in sands before lol

Cleo’s doing great for a first time sandkeeper

WHAT IS GRIAN DOING?!???? 😭😭😭

“I got a tomato with your name on it” pizzacrustduo my beloved

“Honestly I respect the ambition, but I’m gonna have to respect it from the bottom of the freaking leaderboard” Pete 😭😭😭

Meltdown

Grian popping off!!!

Ah no, they’re going through it

“See the thing is: Gem is so good at pvp… on hermitcraft” everyone losing it 😂😂😂

Battle Box

“You did beat Etho multiple times in pvp” “You say that like it’s hard” CLEO 😭

“I’ll do the tnt” it is not possible to describe Grian’s voice right there

“Alright, here’s how we can get 8/9” thank you Pete 😂

Cleo’s reaction to seeing Aimsey is killing me /pos

Pete running around like “WHERE WHERE WHERE” and Gem having already killed everyone my beloved

Everyone cheering on Pete <333

“That’s our ally!!” “Oh my god, I am- I am an ally” LOSING MY MIND /POS

Grian and Gem holding hands on the leaderboard :))

Pete being so happy for Dave <33

Dodgebolt

Everyone hyping up Cleo before they realized she was in 30th rather than 40th, they popped off for their first event!!!

The affectionate bullying in this call is everything to me

“We play Minecraft every single day, I’m not sure everyone does” “We might be nerds” “We might- we might be dorks” “You know we’re dorks, but we’re dorks who know how to play Minecraft” MY STREAMERS!!!

“But what if there was a better dodgebolt?” 10/10 foreshadowing Pete, thank you :)))

“I need a motivational speech” “Pete, you’re the most gorgeous unicorn I’ve ever seen” pizzacrust my beloved 😂

[ethtyn]

ll2 liveblog: etho's pov

love the way he just throws us into the action with "you have 24 hours to live, good luck," everybody scatters. you're so right king the rest of the rules are totally unnecessary <3

fucking. then he makes skizz explain the rules. girlboss behaviour tbh (LOVE that we get the boogeyman back !!!!!!)

"(keeping all of the moss) is what i wanted to do too, but i didn't want to get blamed for it, is pretty much what it boils down to" me as fuck. also, second of the three G's (gatekeep).

MARTYN ASKING WHAT THEIR IDEAL FINAL MEAL WOULD BE AND SKIZZ'S ACCIDENTAL PAUSE AFTER "MY WIFE"

pLEASE THERE'S SO MUCH MARTYN IN THIS EPISODE ALREADY. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD IF THEY DON'T TEAM

like. look at them.

PLEASE PEOPLE STILL THINK ETHO HAS A BOOGEYMAN TEXT DELAY 😭😭😭 aaaaand that makes all three Gs, LET'S HEAR IT FOR GASLIGHT.

i know it's like asking a fish to breathe normal air but Etho please i am trying to manifest a Martho (Etyn?) team up PLEASE stop making him think you're boogeying 😖😖

(i'm five minutes into the episode btw aren't u so glad i haven't been doing individual posts this whole time)

NAURRRRRR NOT SKIZZ ALREADY 😭😭😭 Grian's "i see the rules don't apply to you?" lmfao

BRO ANOTHER BOOGEY IN 7 MINUTES OF VIDEO? please. my heart

HELLO?????? SKIZZ AGAIN???????? SKIZZ STOP BEING ALONE I'M BEGGING YOU DUDE

WAIT i didn't even realize this breaks timmy's curse, at least for first green death of the server. n*ce

Scar with the fall damage 💀 ppl are dropping like flies LOL

bro the fact that Etho's stuck with Martyn this long. i am going to THROW UP. pleasepleasepleasepleasePLEASEPLEASEPLEASE...

"i'll give you some wood as a...as a reward" ayo ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

it's actually really interesting seeing exactly how much video is being cut out. we're 11 minutes into the video but 30 minutes have already gone by in the session. i don't remember exactly but aren't sessions 2-3 hours? cutting that down to 44 minutes is fuckin impressive in that case actually

"okay so we've proven that none of us are the boogeyman right now" HAVE WE GRIAN?? because i heard Tango super unconvincingly say he wasn't and NO ONE ELSE.

"did you flinch? did that freak you out?" you little freak. i love you and am kissing you on the mouth

KCMXKFKD Grian buying Etho's loyalty with a diamond sword..."i will serve you however you wish"...GRITHO ENJOYERS WINNING

I'M CRYING i paused to write that last point and then IMMEDIATELY upon unpausing Grian's like "good, now kill Martyn 😈" and Etho's like. "actually? 🤔 Martyn wya 👀" STOP IT. STOP KILLING MY MARTHO DREAMS.

aaaaand they left him in the Nether. i hate it here OTL

i was so focused on Skizz whispering sweet nothings into Etho's ear (giving him a lovely compliment) that i didn't even notice Jimmy and Joel dying in lava until Martyn asked if it was a boogey kill LMFAO helpppp

WAIT STOP. EVERYBODY SHUT UP.

"CAN'T BELIEVE YOU REPLACED ME WITH A COW, ETHO"

"HE KEEPS ME COMPANY AT LEAST"

I HATE THEM.

"oh, so you're gonna make a boat with a new friend, hey Joel?" [Bdubs voice] ETHO STOP IT.

Jimmy's "sorry Rancher 🥺" after Joel kills the cow 🥴🥴🥴

wait where tf is the enchanter this season? did Grian finally get a clue and use spawn protection if they did a single enchanter again?

hello again Martyn 👀

"can i buy your silence about this spot." "i guess so. you got any diamonds?" "how 'bout wood, you want some wood?" Etho stop trying to give Martyn your wood 😩

oh RIP Cleo, they really are playing on hard mode from the first episode this season

Scarcledubs teamup? 👀👀👀

the way Etho looks at Bdubs after he says the breed stock comment. the dismissive "i'm not interested". i need to lie down (is already lying down)

THE WAY HE INSTANTLY TRIES TO YOINK BDUBS WHEN CLEO ASKS IF HE HAS ROOM ON HIS TEAM (she is so Tired lmaoooo)

I JUST REALIZED THERE'S NO REN THIS SEASON....DEVASTATING

i am so sorry 👇🏻

"do you wanna be our dad?" "...i don't think i could handle it."

👆🏻 sorry again.

this bit is going weirder places than i just took it tbqh

Etho confirmed not 43 (yet)

Pearl & BigB teamup??? also Pearl double-fisting diamond hoes on the serial killer server is objectively so funny

Etho sowing discord and distrust wherever he goes my beloved <3

HELLO AGAIN MARTYN...BELOVED...PLEASE STAY. look Etho is even setting up by himself... there's room for you too...

SKIZZ AGAIN I'M FUCKING LAUGHINGGGGGG (also RIP impulse)

"got me...got me excited" ETHO I AM BEGGING YOU.

Martyn accidentally killing their last cow with the fucking lava bucket 😭😭 you can tell he's genuinely sorry too JFNFJCKFKF

SOMEONE DROPPING A FUCKING LIT BLOCK OF TNT DOWN A HOLE AND PRAYING IS SO FUCKING FUNNY. no way that was a Martyn boogey attempt he's so much more calculated than that?????

it's so endearing to me that Etho's first instinct is to call people by a nickname out of their usernames (that isn't what everyone else calls them) unless they're a closer friend (Littlewood, Skizzle, etc). also RIP BigB (it was Martyn, turns out 😩)

this whole negotiation with Cleo. "Cleo let me steal your cows 🥺" "no." "🙄🙄🙄🙄 FIIIIIIIIINE" god the POUT. obsessed. also SO proud of him for getting over his fear of Cleo one attempt at stealing her cows at a time <3

i haven't watched Martyn's POV yet but if he fucking fell down one of Etho's holes to his death i am going to CACKLE WILDLY especially considering Etho made a comment about it TO HIM (i think) earlier in the session. "i've done this in every smp i've ever joined and people fall down them and get mad at me" LMAOOOOOOO

we got a "take care, bye-bye" 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺💖💖💖💖💖

[moonpawowo]

Alright, I’ve seen some people call Martyn unloyal when it comes to the Life series, so I’m here to rant because I can:

ALRIGHT a pattern I’ve noticed is that N o, he isn’t disloyal. The pattern I’ve seen is how once he has someone to be loyal to, he dedicates to that. During 3rd Life, he stuck by Ren until the end, even going as far to defend the man by chasing down Scar for so long to get back the DogWarts flag, even though Grian and Scott are on him, and Rens telling him it isn’t worth it. Which that ended in him losing a life-

Then for Last Life, he was still loyal to his team, though around the end, they’re either dead or red names. Who was there to be loyal to? Ren. He turned to Ren and stayed loyal to him as long as he could until it was the end, and they’re all fighting to the death.

Double Life, he and Cleo got off on the wrong foot, but he still tried to be a decent soulmate. (Also he was there to support a heartbroken Ren so-) And tried to get them that win. (Him and Cleo)

Finally, Limited Life. Once again his loyalty shines bright. Even though every red or yellow name would be after Scott, he was actively trying to stop them, even if it meant attacking them. When he got to red, he was still loyal to him. And he would’ve stayed loyal if it hadn’t been for the Watchers influencing him at the end when he, Impulse, and Scott are all about to fight to the death. As Impulse and Scott were speaking, they had been influencing his mind. (Watch Martyns POV for that.) Even if they hadn’t, it would’ve been fair anyways, considering they were about to fist fight. Plus Scott had no hard feelings. He said he was glad it was Martyn who took him out rather than Impulse.

Basically the pattern is, Martyn will have someone he dedicates his loyalty to. He is one of the most loyal people on the server. It’s also a strange thing how he always finds a way to be loyal to Ren. From serving him in Third Life, to forming the Shadow alliance in Last Life, to the Heartbroken club in Double Life, to even getting that win with the DogWarts flag around his waist. It leads back to Ren every time. Why don’t I see anyone speak about this? >:<

Also if you wanna speak about unloyal teammates, just look at Grian- I might rant about him next- Life series Grian just makes me angy. XD

I mean- the man usually ALWAYS gets his teammates killed. EVERY TIME- Plus he heckin’ cheated in Double Life. Mans is NOT loyal in the slightest. Anyways, that was just a rant because I got angy about people calling Martyn unloyal when he really isn’t. Lol

[zenithofstories]

i didn't do a post last week cause i didn't have many thoughts; it was a pretty chill session. people got frustrated about the food situation and they set up bases *shrugs*

But this week...

snail week was fucking crazy

-first of all; Etho and Tango's predictions that the session would have seven deaths and end with three people on yellow—lolololoollolololol. three people on red and who knows how many deaths total. Jimmy died four times in the first like ten minutes 😭😭😅 also, how many individual times did Skizz turn red? three? in one session? hilarious

-the snails put them all in such peril that for the most part, they forgot who their allies and enemies were and just talked to everyone and anyone, sharing info. Tango and Joel, Tango and Skizz (admittedly after Skizz killed Tango), Skizz and Scar, Grian and Jimmy (Jimmy just straight up warned Grian that his snail was coming mid argument), Tango and Joel and Gem, Bdubs complimenting Skizz for his kill on Tango. And everyone just mourning everyone who died, even if they should have been rejoicing. They all just forgot they were playing a death game

-Martyn, Mumbo, Jimmy and Scott recognised the 'theory' or 'thought experiment' (meme lol). (i'm pretty sure Lizzie recognised it too, she just didn't want to say it so explicitly) Now we know who our meme lords are 🤣 (plus Grian chose the wildcard 😂) (the complete contrast to Etho who just let it walk right up to him lol) (and Jimmy who let it walk right up to him and then recognised it 😭😅)

-Pearl has an interesting habit of dying early each session and discovering wildcard mechanics in the process, helping her team to survive. I firmly believe that Jimmy still has the canary curse, but Pearl appears to be the wildcard canary

-we got this season's (first??) Tango Rage™ and it was because Scar burnt down his base lol. fork found in kitchen

-a whole lotta shitty assassination attempts lolololol. Skizz vs Impulse and Big B with the cobwebs without any snails close by, Jimmy trying to blow up a light green (illegal) and putting Skizz on red (very illegal), Ren vs Impulse (which was admittedly successful but only just, and didn't follow the plan), Skizz chasing Lizzie down, Bdubs trying desperately to convince Gem and Joel to sacrifice themselves to their snails so they would know their names, Jimmy trying to set Scott's snail on fire, Jimmy with all his tnt minecarts, probably more i've forgotten

-also a few pretty good ones, to be fair. Impulse distracting Etho from the creeper, Skizz vs Tango, Skizz chasing Scar into an underwater ravine, Scar and Jimmy drowning Bdubs' snail in a hole so he had to get close to free it,

-everyone just loved their snails lol. a bunch of people said they would miss their snails, and called them cute. Tango was overjoyed that his said 'yahoo' and stated it could kill him any time lol. (admittedly a few {Ren, Bdubs} called theirs freaks)

-i really love this series. i love when people are obviously having fun, and I love the sound of laughter. This series is honestly one of the most fun things on the internet. Joel's giggle especially is fantastic

-Lizzie: "i better not walk off a cliff in f5 mode. rookie mistake" 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I can't tell if that was shade for Scar's first death or just a coincidence 🤣🤣

-so many snail cams 😂

-Skizz had better get credited for Scar drowning; it didn't register automatically and i desperately hope that they don't forget to give him a life for that. he totally killed Scar

-Grian, Mumbo and Lizze with absolute mega amounts of courage (or stupidity) and going underground. like just incredibly dangerous adventures to go where they have so little options for escape. massive respect for all three of them. also Martyn and Etho going to the nether to be fair

-the plot to turn snails invisible was so devious, and i'm so glad it worked, but pretty sad it happened to be Scar's. Ren should still get the credit for it though

-we ended the session with three people on red: Skizz, Scar and Tango, and four people on yellow: Ren, Jimmy, Pearl and Mumbo. i desperately desperately hope that no one gets eliminated next week. four episodes would be a devastatingly short season.

-Joel's shock at all the deaths was pretty funny lol

-Joel and Lizzie organised a meet-cute for their snails?? omfg!

-the snails are voiced by Oli (theOrionSound)? 😂 lololololololoolol

-i hope y'all have seen @rusty-courage's in a Nutshell this week; it's the cutest thing i have ever seen and perfectly encapsulates the vibes of the session

-hilarious how much Bdubs regrets the 'tuff guys' bit

-Martyn referring to Joel's 'forty-second obsidian' 🤣🤣🤣

-the family-friendly insults are great 😂 'jerk' is always fun, and Pearl's 'stinky butt' is hilarious

-the G's racing their snails up bam mountain was pretty funny

-Pearl saying 'i can see your sparkles, sir' and Ren not being able to help laughing. my beloveds

-Poor Jimmy is so determined to win, or at least break the canary curse, and he was so disappointed when he died so many times. he almost rage quit when the second creeper blew him up 😭

so i've just finished watching all the first episodes, so i wanted to give my thoughts on the first Wild Life session:

-so much fun i love it so much. i'm so glad they're all still having fun and continuing the series, and that Mumbo and Lizzie came back, despite dying early in Secret Life (i was a tiny bit worried they might get a bit dejected and pass on this one). also thrilled Ren is able to play this time; he's a blast

-there is a lot of mistrust going around which is very curious to me. most of it stems from previous seasons and has no bearing on what was happening at the time. Pearl straight up telling Cleo she expected her to betray her; Mumbo and Skizz not trusting Martyn, and then Grian; and then not trusting that Martyn just wanted to use their enchanter; the huge immediate aggression towards Scar when he came out of the mountain into Grian, Skizz and Mumbo's base; Mumbo not trusting Skizz (his teammate!) when he asked for someone to pass him a diamond; Scott, Cleo, Pearl and Impulse assuming Joel stole their cows, probably more i'm forgetting. it's definitely obvious to me that these people have learnt how the games work and learnt from the pain (as we do). i'm very curious to see if the general server mistrust grows, and the impact it has on everyone and the people

-i love JImmy, Big B, Lizzie and Ren forming a dnd party and Ren (in true bardic fashion) has a guitar within reach and is willing to break into song at the first campsite (this honestly might be my favourite moment from all the life series at the moment. the guitar within reach, Ren's beautiful voice, how much the others thought it was great. fantastic vibes all around)

-i really want Scar and Martyn to team up. they are both instantly mistrusted, to the point that both of them (in their first episodes, no less) expressed that if people are going to treat them like a villain, then they may as well act like it. if the two of them team up to take revenge on everyone being mean to them in a new series i think they would be a force to be reckoned with

-Skizz and Mumbo is a fantastic team-up. both very genuine people who are so funny together

-i hope they get the lag fixed, or that it was just from the size-changing mod and they don't have to deal with it for the rest of the series

-Gem and Joel's partnership - in the early days Gem is going to be a fantastic counterbalance for Joel; help keep him calmer and curb his wild ideas. But once Gem gives in to her own urges... oh boy

-does Big B know that he can go caving with people? cause he seemed to be under the impression that he had to get geared out before he could make friends and it would suck if he ended up alone all the time because it hasn't occurred to him that he can go caving with people right at the start

-double life thought: i know most people count Pearl as the winner, but did Scott technically win as well? cause they were the last pair alive, and died in the same tick. it probably doesn't matter at all, but i wonder about it sometimes (especially in how it would affect Martyn's lore but that's not canon)

-i don't think Jimmy has broken the canary curse. i subscribe to the theory that cause Lizzie died in the End, the Watchers weren't able to perceive it and then he was the first to die in the Overworld (i'm not counting Real Life as canon; it happened and i enjoyed it but it wasn't a full series and they were deliberately playing it silly as an april fool's joke. very glad that Cleo won though. hope they get a full series win as well)

-i'm glad that Tango and Skizz (deliberately) didn't team together, but i kinda wish Tango had ended up in a different group. him, Etho and Bdubs are fun, don't get me wrong, but a whole lot of the fun of the series is seeing people interact and work with people they don't usually. Tango and Jimmy was a top tier pairing in Double Life, and Tango is hilarious. i would love to see him branch out more and work with some more people

-there is more than just the wild card. Grian said he wasn't going to explain it, and i didn't notice anything else happening (but i'm also not expecting it to be much until they get to the late game). i think that there will be a wild card that affects the players, and then also something that affects the world? we'll see, i guess

-now that everyone who has played is playing (i'm pretty sure? if i've forgotten someone i'm gonna be sad) who is gonna sub in if needed?

-i love Mumbo's "that was sub-one intelligence mate" when they all fell 🤣

-i'm not sure what the purpose of including the creakings or whatever they're called? nevermind i just looked it up and they're going to be in the game at some point. weird. i'm not sure how i feel about creakings coming to minecraft though

-very glad they've got six lives this time. it will both allow them to not worry so much about mistakes and accidents (as evidenced by Pearl) and encourage them to take risks, which will be fantastic

[minshinxx]

just woke up from a nap omg these teams are amazing i love them <333

[bluiex]

Slams hand on desk We need more Team Rancher, also I've seen people make Gri, Jimmy's brother and I like that idea as well I find it really interesting But to add more, esp at the start Tango is just weirded out how this complete stranger knows so much about him. He can't deny he's a Very attractive stranger, and that sad kicked puppy look stays with Tango until he finally can't stand it any longer and just has to know more At first Jimmy is super hesitant to start sharing, cause Tango might think he's weird and not want to deal with him. And its extremely awkward, as neither is good with small talk. But they find their groove after awhile as Tango helps Jim start building a decent starter base. Even though they both try and say they aren't good at building. While Tango is off building impressive builds I feel like Tango is a bit self-conscious of his builds, he's surrounded by those who are astounding at building. And while he's just as good, he himself doesn't see it. And it becomes a topic I think one day between them as Tango sets up a small item sorter for Jimmy. As he explains, he's much better at redstone And for Jimmy he gets to sit back and watch Tango work, not that he wasn't sneaking glimpses while Tango was helping him build before. But its familiar and comfortable again, and not having to worry about someone stealing your stuff or burning your place down has been a nice change of pace That doesn't mean Scar and Grian won't tease Jimmy over the fact he's like a lost puppy following Tango around. Anytime Tango needs help or resource gather, he comes to Jimmy who will literally jump at the chance to go One night they are star gazing and Tango finally musters up the courage to ask. What were they before? And Jimmy is silent a bit to long when Tango props himself up on his elbows and says his name. With a sigh, Jimmy tells him about soulmates and soulbounds, about the ranch and what went on. How Scar burned it down and Tango rolls his eyes and says he would Then after a moment or two of silence, he finally tells Tango what they were. How they spent their days and nights, their warden. Which Tango laughs at and isn't surprised one bit he had a warden there not with how he's planned Decked Out. But once its explained, Tango is thoughtful. He's never met someone like Jimmy, but he's glad he's getting the chance to again Cause somewhere deep inside of him something stirs, a warm familiar feeling. Even if he can't place it, and may never be able to. He's really enjoyed Jimmy's company. And in a bold move after plopping back down to look at the sky he takes Jimmy's hand in his delighting in the small gasp He might not remember but his heart sure does, and he's going to make the most of what he's got now 🌿

lksajsdgjkhgrz *rolls around and kicks my feet* theyre just too cute man. Jimmy being still so in love with Tango, watching him do his stuff just kinda lost in his own had smiling like an idiot until Tango questions him- Jimmy then getting flustered and lookin away lol ofc Grian an Scar tease him for it- up until they finally start something with their relationship again Deffo slow at first, just being seen holding hands or just sitting close to one another, cuddling sometimes utter cuties

[theres-an-impulstor-among-us]

I read your Grian and Zed oneshot and could I pretty please get another one (maybe a sequel, maybe not) with Worm man, Poultry man, and EX? We need the sidekick boi here too ;3

I’m so sorry this is so late! I’ve had a rough couple of days and this one ended up being a lot longer than I expected lol but anyway, here we are! Hope it’s good!

…

  Sitting on top of the billboard in the shopping district are Hermitcraft’s two superheroes, keeping an eye on the goings on. It seems to be a fairly quiet day, however; the last person either of them saw was Scar disappearing into the town hall over an hour ago. But the two are just having fun hanging out up here, so they continue keeping watch over the district, while munching on the half stack of golden carrots Grian brought with him.

  “Soo… which one of us is the sidekick?” asks Grian out of the blue. 

  Zedaph shoots him an amused look. “Why does one of us have to be the sidekick? Can’t we be partners?”

  “I mean, yeah, true. But if one of us HAD to be the sidekick, which one would it be?”

  “Probably you, cuz I’ve been a superhero a season longer than you.”

  Grian pauses. “Honestly, that’s not the answer I was expecting but it does make sense.”

  Zedaph gives a laugh. “Good. Trust me, we don’t need a sidekick. If I was on my own, maybe I’d consider getting another one, but a partner is even better than a sidekick.”

  In the ensuing pause, Zedaph realises what he said. Unfortunately, Grian has also picked up on it. “Another one? What do you mean?”

  “Ah…” Zedaph clears his throat. “Doesn’t matter.”

  “No, I wanna hear this. You had a sidekick?”

  Zedaph searches his brain for either an excuse to not reply or a false explanation that Grian will buy. When he finds neither, he gives a quiet sigh. “Yeah, but it didn’t end well. Or start well. Or go well for that matter.”

  “Oh, jeez.” Grian frowns sympathetically. “Do you want to talk about it?”

  “Look, let’s just say I was naive and I thought he was good but he wasn’t. I came out of it looking and feeling very stupid, so I’d rather not have a repeat of that.” After a moment, he gives a smile. “That’s why I’m glad I have a partner who I already know and trust.” 

  “Aww.” Grian nudges him with his elbow. “Do you mean me?”

  Zedaph snickers. “Nope, sorry, I mean Professor Beak. Best partner I’ve ever had.”

  Grian exaggerates a pout and gently strokes the parrot sitting on his shoulder. “Wow.”

  But as he starts to say something else, he spots a familiar figure walking through the shopping district. His face lights up. “Oh, look who it is! Zed, c’mon, I gotta introduce you to this guy.”

  He jumps down from their perch and rushes towards the person, followed closely by a curious Zedaph. “Hey! Hey, EX!”

  The figure turns and that’s when Zedaph recognises them with a jolt. That name, coupled with that familiar red helmet… It can’t be… can it…?

  He quickly scoots behind a tree as Grian stops in front of the person, beaming. “Hey! It’s been a long time!”

  Evil Xisuma, now going by the name EX, smiles at him. “Hey, Grian. Yeah, it’s been a while.” 

  “Grian? I see no Grian here,” says Grian innocently.

  EX chuckles. “Oh yeah. Sorry, Mr Poultry Man. You out here patrolling?”

  “Yup! Keeping watch over the server with my new partner!” Grian turns to introduce Zedaph to EX but frowns as he realises Zedaph is gone. “Uh… Zed? Where’d you go?”

  “Wait…” EX freezes as they recognise the name. “Zedaph…?”

  Grian spots his friend hiding behind a tree a few blocks down the path. “Zed, what are you doing?”

  Realising he can’t hide any longer, Zedaph slowly emerges from behind the tree and approaches the two, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. “Hello.”

  Grian frowns, sensing the tension between them. “You know EX already?” he asks slowly.

  Zedaph holds EX’s gaze for a moment but has to turn away. “Yeah. I knew him a long time ago.”

  EX shifts their feet awkwardly, causing Grian to step forwards, clearing his throat. “EX goes by they/them pronouns now.”

  Zedaph glances at EX, who looks away from him. He wonders whether EX was too scared to correct him themself. Has it really been so long that EX can’t be as open around him as they used to be? 

  Finally, he turns back to Grian. “They used to be my friend but that was a long time ago.” 

  “It WAS a long time ago, wasn’t it?” EX says quietly.

  “Just over three years. Since we last teamed up, anyway.”

  EX sighs quietly. “Listen, I’m sorry I left you. I was just feeling so guilty that you believed I was a good person and I couldn’t continue that lie, but I couldn’t exactly tell you the truth either, could I?” 

  “I only believed you were a good person because that’s what you told me,” Zedaph retorts. “But it doesn’t matter. I’m not angry at you anymore, I’m angry at myself. For being so stupid as to not realise why you were able to break me out of that prison so easily.”

  “Oh.” EX hesitates, realising now why Zedaph is being so careful around them. “When did you find out?”

  Zedaph’s shoulders slump. “After X banned you. I begged and begged him to reconsider but he refused. You have no idea how long I cried, how many sleepless nights I had, when X told me the truth about you. My friends got hurt because I was too naive to realise that the person I was calling my sidekick was actually a villain.”

  “Zedaph, you- you have every right to be angry at me for that,” EX says quietly. “But I’ve changed now, I promise.”

  “I can vouch for them,” Grian chimes in. “They’ve been helping me with building projects on and off for a couple of weeks. During that time, they told me a bit about their past and I can tell they’re not who they used to be.” 

  Zedaph gives his friend a look. “Did they tell you about their shared past with me?”

  “No, they only-.” 

  Grian breaks off, glancing from Zedaph to EX, as the penny finally drops. “Oh… EX is the former sidekick you were referring to, aren’t they?” 

  Zedaph and EX both nod slowly. 

  “I was a far better sidekick than I was a villain, honestly,” admits EX quietly. “I feel like I took to being good much quicker than I did to being evil.”

  “You did,” Zedaph agrees. “But that still didn’t stop you from getting yourself banned.”

  “I-I’ve made some mistakes, that much is true. In fact, a LOT of mistakes. But that’s exactly what I’m back here to do: I’m here to prove to myself, Xisuma, and the rest of the server that I can be a good person.” They clasp their hands together in an anxious gesture that Zedaph recognises from when they worked together. “And I want to prove it to you too, Zedaph.”

  Zedaph hesitates, watching his old friend with a conflicted look. 

  At that moment, however, Grian and Zedaph’s communicators go off with three messages in quick succession. 

<Xisuma> trapped by Wither!!!

<Xisuma> one heart no food left!!!!

<Xisuma> help!!!!!

  “Looks like this is your chance to prove yourself,” Grian says, patting EX on the shoulder. “Xisuma needs our help and we’re gonna go save him. Coming?”

  EX doesn’t even hesitate. “Yes, I’m coming. Let’s go.”

…

  The group follow X’s given coordinates to an underground tunnel in a remote part of the server. As they get closer, they can hear menacing sounds, followed almost immediately by a loud explosion.

  “Uh oh!” Grian picks up speed. “Quickly, guys!”

  They burst through an opening in the tunnel, only to find themselves immediately confronted by a half-health wither. 

  “Move!” Zedaph screeches.

  He shoves EX to one side and Grian dives to the other as the wither fires a burst of exploding skulls at them. 

  As EX scrambles to their feet, they spot Xisuma squished into a small gap in the wall, clutching a clearly cracked shield in his hand. His eyes widen visibly as he spots his evil counterpart. 

  EX winces. They’re not supposed to be here; they were banned several months ago, and Xisuma knows that. He is the one who banned EX. 

  But before they can interact with their counterpart, they’re forced to duck under another burst of skulls and scramble for a safe nook on the other side of the cave.

  Meanwhile, Grian and Zedaph are hacking away at the wither, but they’re making slow progress; the wither keeps attacking back, forcing them to retreat to avoid getting hit. 

  “X, get outta here, quickly!” Grian yells. 

  Xisuma hurriedly squeezes himself out of the crevice and dashes for the exit to the cave. However, because of his low health, he knows he has to be careful on the uneven rocky ground.

  Just as he gets to the cave mouth, his foot drops into a small gap created by one of the wither explosions and his ankle rolls, causing him to pitch forwards with a yelp. 

  “Xisuma!” Zedaph screeches, as he and Grian are forced to retreat to avoid a barrage of skulls. 

  Unexpectedly, the wither twists mid-air and fires off three skulls. The first two sail over Xisuma’s head but the third is heading straight for him.

  A split second before it hits him, EX dives in front of him and takes the skull to the back, propelling them past Xisuma and into the stone wall of the cave. 

  “EX!” Zedaph screeches. 

  “Zed, look up!” Grian yells suddenly. 

  Zedaph does so, just in time to see Grian tossing his sword back to him. Taking a deep breath, he leaps up and forward, catching his sword mid-air, and brings the weapon down on the wither. The critical hit takes the last bit of its health. 

  He lands neatly on the ground and uses EX’s fallen shield to protect himself and Xisuma as the wither explodes in a burst of light. 

  As Grian rushes over to help Xisuma, Zedaph dashes to EX’s side. The wither effect has worn off but EX is clearly still in pain; even though Zedaph can’t see their face, their muscles are visibly tense. 

  “EX, can you hear me?” Zedaph asks worriedly. “Are you alright?” 

  For one horrifying moment, there is silence. Then:

  “‘M fine.”

  Zedaph breathes out in relief. “Jeez, you scared me. What were you thinking? You could’ve died and we both know you won’t respawn.”

  “I-I wasn’t thinking.” EX sits up, with Zedaph’s help. “I just… acted.”

  “Well, you saved me from a painful death,” says Xisuma, giving his counterpart a sympathetic look. “I just don’t understand why you would save me, after our history.”

  “I, um…” EX hesitates. “I was inspired to be a better person recently, and when I saw you were in trouble, I just… didn’t let myself hesitate.”

  “Really?” asks Xisuma in surprise. “Who inspired you?”

  EX gives a small smile. “Two friends who mean a lot to me. But…” They pause, taking in a deep breath. “I know I’m not actually meant to be back here, so I do completely understand if you ban me again.”

  To their surprise, Xisuma immediately shakes his head. “I’m not going to do that. For one thing, you just saved my life. But more importantly, I sensed a change in you the second I saw you today, Exy. A very positive change. If these friends of yours on Hermitcraft caused that change, then there’s no way I’m gonna stop you from being around them. But I WILL be keeping a close eye on you, of course.”

  “O-Of course.” EX covers their visor with their hands, eliminating any chance that the others might notice the tears that have sprung to their eyes. “Thank you, Xisuma.”

  Xisuma places his hand on his counterpart’s shoulder. “No, thank YOU, Exy.” 

  He glances at Grian and Zedaph, who are watching together a few blocks away. “You two superheroes better get back up there and change before someone notices you’re missing.”

  “I want EX to come with us,” Zedaph responds. “Please.”

  Xisuma watches him steadily for a moment before nodding. “Okay. I just need to do some admin things to make sure their code isn’t still recognised as being banned, so they’re able to respawn in this world if they die.”

  “Thanks,” says Zedaph gratefully. “Could you also let the server know of the situation?”

  “Will do. Careful on your way back.”

  The three make their way back up towards the surface, leaving Xisuma behind in the raggedly destroyed hole. 

  “Are you sure you’re okay?” asks Zedaph, noticing EX shivering. 

  EX nods. “I’m fine. Just leftover wither effect, that’s all. I’m used to floating around in the void, not having the life sucked out of me.” 

  To their surprise, Grian chuckles. “Being back on Hermitcraft, you’re gonna have to get used to all kinds of effects. But hey, don’t worry: we’ll be here to help you through it.”

  “All of it,” adds Zedaph warmly, slinging his arm over EX’s shoulder. 

  A smile slowly spreads over EX’s face as they feel the warmth of being enveloped on either side by two friends. For the first time, they feel safe and cared for. They’re about to start their new life on Hermitcraft. 

  And there’s no two people he would rather start it with. 

[thatonefatgumsimp]

same warning as prev post, pls read. (Also srr the list looks less list-y I can't split it between rb's and I was too impatient to wait and put them all in one post).

7. Cleo: "HER LITTLE JINGLES- I agree with the person in the comments of their videos who said it, Joe's personality totally is rubbing off on her. Love it, amazing intro lol. The Tango and Cleo team up is a surprise to be sure, but a welcome one nonetheless. Very chill rn actually! 'We'll probably be stabbing each other in no time!' Perhaps, but today is not that day...hopefully- CLEO'S CACKLE AT SCAR FAILING- 💀 mood 'yeah I'm sure, I'm sure there was' LIZZIE LMAOO meanwhile, Cleo just staring at it like: LIIIZZIEEEEEEE! Omg- 💀😭 /lh their base above Lizzie's looks pretty nice honestly! No cuz 'the speeper kepepitiper' is giving me 'combabidaber' vibes from when Scar tried to pronounce comparitor when he and Grian set up those launchers in Doc's perimeter- 'there's a demon' MUMBO! Mumbo's nervous laughter- 💀 'it's great, isn't it? It's my favorite!' Honestly I think probably one of the fandom's favorites to draw too! Or at the very least, my favorite to draw :3 WAIT WHAT DOES THE AXIS THING MEAN?! I DON'T UNDERSTAND! 'Hey Bdubs, where's your boyfriend?' Canon boyfriends? :O c!Ethubs canon boyfriends?! Oop- aaaand my yt crashed 😔 it couldn't handle Cleo's amazingness smh. Pupper alliance <3 'YOU'RE CANADIAN, YOU SPELL WITH EXTRA Us TOO!' her just going 'why do we need wool?!' 'I'm basing with Etho now'. Ooh this is gonna be fun to watch!"

8. Gem: "SHE'S HERE! SHE'S HERE! GEMISGREATGEMISGREATGEMISGREAT! SHE'S SO GONNA GEMINISLAY THIS LIFE SEASON! 'We've both got to get to the cherry blossoms, Lizzie!' Mmmm cherry blossom...OK I got distracted, but I alr love this team up lol. 'We will watch Gem' 'YOU'RE DOING AMAZING, SWEETIE!' now we just need an obligatory 'BEHIND YOU, GEM!' 'This band is falling apart' 💀 I love this trio sm already...I'm so making fanart- 'SHE'S JUST GEM-' iconic ✌💀 also watching Gem's POV after seeing Skizz's, I get why it looked so creepy now...rip Skizz o7 for having to do that 'Scott and the Gems' THEIR RIVAL BAND OH NO /lhj love their houses <3 Scott's 'I told you!' carries so much sass and I love that tbh. Ohhh this series is gonna be great I can already tell. 'I got a little worried about how clingy everyone was' awwweh and she built a little fishing pond! I just love how aesthetic her bases always are even if they're just simple little bases :3"

9. Tango: "NOT TANGO GETTING THE EASIEST TASK OF ALL TIME- 💀 Tangocleodayonealliancetangocleodayonealliancetangocleodayoneall- 'if you hear a high pitched squeal, that's me and it's time to flee' this man is a whole mood cuz same- ohh no his /gift broke ): I keep getting distracted, but like- can you blame me? These people are great at making content! Absolutely amazing! Tango trying to find Scar to talk to him lol 💀 SCAR JUST EXPLAINING AHSOKA(? Idk how to spell it...) TO TANGO IS THE BEST LMAO also so glad Tango included a good part of the conversation since Scar didn't /lh was excited to see how the conversation went. This has just made me more curious as to what Big B is up to...to keep with the Star Wars theme of the previous conversation, the gaslight is strong with this one! Tango teaching Jimmy about the goodies is great. 'Tango, I'm gonna force you to adopt me pretty soon' well that's one way to ask about an alliance lol- PEARL'S DOG'S NAME BEING MAILBOX LMFAO- I CAN'TTT 😭💀 Etho just lying for funsies lol love that for him...Tango's 'oh it's you...' to Impulse 💀 Cleo saying 'TANGO!' and then Tango rushing to explain and stumbling over his words I- lol. Are Tango and Skizz always like this hanging out together? Lol 💀 /lh ohhhh no the fighting- o7 Tango Cleo team up, died before it started. 'Who could we team up with?' I'm with the people in Skizz's comments who said they should convince Scar and Jimmy to team or ally with them. I think that'd be fun! :3 Bdubs' innocent 'am I?' 💀 Skizz's confusion at who Willy is BC he can't play DO2 lol-"

10. Scott: "OK, not to throw shade, but Scott being ONE OF the only ones so far to not have to ask if the secrets were supposed to stay secret (or share it, like somebody /lh cough cough) is amazing. I'm excited already! PEARL JUMPSCARING SCOTT LMAOOO poor Scott- 'y'all were obsessed with flower husbands, it's actually just me & Pearl' 💀 nah cuz I choked on my chicken tender lmaoo- Scott talking about gift items while little shinies spin on the screen. Perfect. SCOTTTTT LMAOOO 'everyone needs a hobby'. I'm not gonna live through this ep, but in a different way from Martyn's. Watching Martyn's, I almost died of an anxiety induced heart attack (/lhhj). Meanwhile watching Scott's, I'm gonna die choking on my food from laughter! 'CAN A MAN TALK TO A MAN?' 💀 'JIMMY!! How do you survive sometimes?!' paired with his laughter lol- 'oh I forgot there was no regeneration' 'ohh my-' 'Every. Single. Time.' he's not wrong, but also o7 lol Scott bringing doors underwater tho. Sometimes, I think he might be the only responsible one here /lh SCOTT QUOTING MEAN GIRLS- 😭😂 'you're doing amazing, sweetie!' Lol- yup, def my favorite alliance so far, the second POV confirms it. 'That sounds like an 80s rock band' indeed it does, Scott. 'Very different answers' 💀 yeah...Martyn's not having too hot of a time...o7 'THIS BAND IS FALLING APART' 💀 'they're intimidated' after watching 9 other POVs, can confirm. 'You know, I was going to before you told me not to, so thanks' I- 💀 this ep is fr a hard mode try not to laugh challenge- it's amazing! Scott zooming in on Jimmy and waving at him lol 'Scott and the Gems' 💀 which Scott though? Cuz both of their content is like finding a precious jewel so could be either- (srsly tho love the content from these three <3) 'I JUST GOT GOATED!' but in which way, Impulse? /lhhj 'where have you heard that before?!' 'Don't think about it-' ohh poor sweet Gem...also. IMPULSE! 'I'm gonna use the diving board' good idea, it saves time. Omg he got so many goodies- noice. Gem's relieved sigh of 'thank you-' 💀 'Gem I got us a sheep, we have one' and a very cute sheep at that :3 well...I WOULD be sad ep 1 is over, but I still have the second session POVs to watch after I catch up. BUT WOOO HYPE! LET'S GOOOOOO! Oop hold on, gotta vibe to his outro music."

11. Bdubs: "O h ... Oh my God...it's over an hour, I can't sit still that long- I will try- 'you stole my horse last time, Bdubs, I don't forget' meanwhile, me, who has no context for, like, half the life series cuz I never end up finishing: Bdubs' indignant gasp and 'how dare you' 💀 also I think Joel's habit of horse killing is rubbing off on Lizzie lol- 'how did you get a saddle this early on?' Bdubs: 👀 [you feel the weight of your sins crawling on your back] lol- 'I didn't kill the cows, it's worse-' o7 'WHO ARE YOU AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE WITH BDUBS??' 💀 lmaoo- So completely normal about c!Ethubs- 'GEM ACCOSTED ME!' 'sounds about right-' 💀 I'm gonna love the sibling vibes coming from those two this series lol- Bdubs and his chainmail lol! Common Canadian David Attenborough W /lhhj ohh no Bdubs' mic didn't just cut out, his prox mod malfunctioned! Noooo rip- Bdubs' 'STOPP!' in response to Martyn having 16 hearts was me all through his POV when he took risks or damage. 'It could be like the Alps, but bad' 💀 Mumbo lmaoo- 'we could be called the Axis!' OK, now that ik what that means after a kind tumblr user explained to me- uhmmm...yeah let's just say it's good Cleo was there- 'YES I KNOW IT'S UPSIDE DOWN!' 💀😂 MAILBOX- 😭💀 Bdubs is so great at naming things lol /lh 'oh, Etho? He's uhhhhhh-' so normal- OK so I sat still for 39 minutes then I got distracted, back to it. 'Alright, hopping off' 💀 'Bdubs, I'll give you one too. I know you love these.' SO. NORMAL. I SWEAR- BDUBS HOW DID YOU GET IN THE TREES?! His immediate yes to iron horse armor lol! Martyn and Bdubs: -talking about horse armor- Scar: Jimmy, I'll burn your house down- it's even better after multiple times lmao 💀 'oh I am? OK' pfttttt- DO2 references go brrrrr 'OK bye' 💀 perfect ending lol-"

12. Pearl: "pftttt someone in the comments comparing Pearl's base to a hobbit hole- okokok I'm watching the video now- Pearl jumpscaring Scott 💀 'DON'T KILL THOSE COWS!' lol oouh nice Etho and Pearl gift heart exchange 'it's not that you can't speak horse, they can't speak you' 'WHO KEEPS LEAVING FLOATING TREES?!' poor cleaning lady, having to clean even outside of Hermitcraft o7 'did I hear a Lizzie?' 'Yeah, where are you?' lol :O protection pact? Alliance? Lizzie Pearl alliance? Funsies! 'Don't worry, I'll save you' 🥺 literally goals- NOT PEARL AND JOEL FIGHTING FOR THE GIFTED HEART- 💀 literally tho why do Jimmy and Pearl give such sibling vibes lol- 'that's so spooky' yes, yes it is. Also the fact that, as far as I can remember, only Pearl and Jimmy mentioned something about the secret keeper like that (Pearl said it's spooky, Jimmy said the symbol looked familiar) 'n'awwwwwww! I just witnessed a moment :3' yes you did, Pearl. And it was very wholesome. 'Oh, but you're absolutely wonderful, Mumbo!' 💀 that's really nice of her to say, but like, the timing lmao- DOGGIE! Doggie <3 'I see a camel's butt over there' c a m e l 'no high-fiving!' Lol! ARCHIMEDES AWWWWWEH 🥺 THAT'S THE PERFECT NAME! 'Did you kill Alfred?' Oop- Scar's in troubleeeeeeee~ /lh :O Joel alliance! Noice. 'Cuz it's got a cherry wood door! It's all you need!' Lol I meannnn true, what better way to spice up a dirt hut than with a pretty door :3 noooo I don't want it to end D: ...oh wait I still have all the session 2s to watch- ...OK fine it can end lol- gosh that was a great episode! Also ty Pearl for reminding me to bug my mom (/lh) about preordering a hoodie :3"

Also WOO ONLY 5 MORE POVs THEN I CAN MOVE ON TO SESSION 2!

Which Secret Life POVs I've Watched So Far (will be updated and edited as I finish)

OK so I may or may not have gotten distracted again- oops- but basically I'm putting here which POVs I've already watched in full and what my first thought about each one was.

-WARNING: wall of texts and ramblings from an mcyt obsessed audhd under the cut...and also spoilers. Don't click unless you're ready for simultaneously spoilers and an ungodly amount of text lol-

Grian: "God this series is so hype I can't wait to see what all happens and- OMG GEM IS HERE! :D GEM IS GREAT! I can't wait to see her kick Etho's ass at PvP again /lh ...waiminute...is that logo on the statue...is that the Watcher logo??? Huh??? Wait...and why does it have the same mossiness of the Entity and Grian's s9 base? Suspicious...OMG the chaotic Best Friend energy with Mumbo and Grian- tbh would be me and my best friend on any given day. Amazing. Their laughter is so infectious too lmao- Oough merch! Pretty :3 Wait it's over already? Aweeeeh ): can't wait for the next episode tho!"

Mumbo: "Wait he switched sides of the circle when Martyn punched Jimmy lmaoooo just like 'these people are crazy, save me, Grian-' 💀 The best friend energy omg still amazing I love their dynamic so much! Ooh a sideways house that *IS* an interesting idea! WHY DOES JIMMY KEEP BREAKING THE CRAFTING TABLES LMAO Hmmmmm Impulse ik cherry blossom is great, but that salesman voice is indeed very sus. I'm with Mumbo on this one."

Skizz: "Idk I watched it when I was very tired last night and all I remember is 'Awwweh a frog! Take care of him...WH- TANGO!!!' and also him apologizing to Gem which was very nice. Oh yeah and love island <3"

Jimmy: "Alright, Timmy, you've got this. Just don't die and- OMG MARTYN NOOOO LMAOO- Aweeeh it's like when you have a really young sibling or you're, like, a parent or something and you kiss the child's scraped knee to make it feel better- 🥺 wholesome. THANK YOU! I thought I was alone in recognizing that symbol, thank you for acknowledging it. JIMMY LOOK OUT OMG YOU'RE GONNA GIVE ME A HEART ATTACK! OK but the task. This man is an absolute menace lol. Aweh that's very nice of Scar to compliment Jimmy's outfit! SCOTT LMFAOOOO YOU'RE SO RIGHT, BUT AT THE SAME TIME 💀 Jimmy building in the Mesa? Tumble Town 2 electric boogaloo?? 'Hmmmm if Scar's building a shack, we're gonna have to have a shack-off, mine's better.' NO JIMMY DON'T STEAL THE CAMEL! D: pftttt Scar would- remember the Relation-ship? And the Ranch? Arson boy lol. THE VALLEY GIRL ACCENT I CAN'T- 😭"

Scar: "OK, Scar, you can do the task, I believe in you. I've seen 4 other POVs which prove that you failed, but I still believe in you. OMG THAT'S WHY HE COMPLIMENTED JIMMY'S OUTFIT LMAOOO I WASN'T PAYING ATTENTION- So true, Scott. So true. But you can't stop them, they're still gonna end up neighbors. I know, I already watched Jimmy's POV. SCAR NOOOO YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO TELL THEM- The way he jumped in the water- 💀 hc that c!Scar shook out his long-ish messy brown hair like a dog after that. Cuz he would. 'I'll make an exception for you. The first and ONLY exception.' if someone doesn't use this as, like, a fanfic title or something I swear- literally perfect material for a c!Scarian fic title. AWEEEEEEH HE CALLED GRIAN THE LIGHT OF HIS LIFE- I CAN'T BHATGLFYSJBJSRSKBLBK 🥺 Scar just like 'y'all crazy. Bye.' AWEEEEH GRIAN AND SCAR'S CAMEL RIDE! DESERTDUODESERTDUODESERTDUODESERTDUO! The way they stare at the hole Big B dug like *insert surprised Pikachu here* awwwwweh the way he let Grian have the cactus monopoly 🥺 you will never not convince me that bullying is their love language. c!desertduo bullies each other affectionately...I'm so normal about c!desertduo I promise- HE TALKED ABOUT ASOKA FOR 30 MINUTES OFC HE DID- 💀😭 I was wondering why he didn't include it lmao- NOT SCAR TREATING THE CAMEL LIKE A DISNEY RIDE LOL learning about the task goodies with Tango, Jimmy, and Scar 101 'IS IT A ROCKET' LMAOOOOO- HE'S SUFFOCATING AGAIN- SCAR BE CAREFULLLLL!!! Ik it's not in the comments, but, I GOT TO THIS POINT AND I'M ENJOYING IT, SCAR! Love this series sm and I'm only 5 POVs in lol. 'It's looking kinda like a shack' 'fancy house and exotic materials' indeed, Etho. Also yes, Scar, part of what gave it away is that ur favorite color is orange lol /lh the fact that Jimmy is the only one I've seen to call him 'Obi' when he says 'Hello There'- amazing. 'Nonono it's not a shack, look at that entrance!' But, Scar, you just said- ...OK- 'this is my shack' OK, Scar I'm confused. Is it or isn't it a shack? Ofc he cut out the arson threats and allegations smh /lh 'until next time, we'll see you later, and don't forget to subscribe because you may just become. SCARRRRED FOR LIFE!' ...yes I've memorized his outro-"

Martyn: "Wait OK before we start- are we sure that punching Jimmy didn't just, like, transfer the canary's curse? /lh like it could also be that he won last series and now he's the 'wet cat' of the first episode like I saw in another post, but like, what if?? I guess we'll see, huh? The awkward 'goodbye' and then walking the same way lmaooo 💀 Lizzie and Gem: 'WE HAVE TO GET TO THE CHERRY BLOSSOMS!' Martyn: 'uhhhhh anyways so-' what am I gonna get? Well uhhh probably one of the life hoodies, but I'll probably have to convince my mom to get it as a Christmas gift cuz I already spent a lot in the last month cuz I have no self control- but yeah probably the balloon hearts hoodie or the drippy hearts one. Love those. 'Ofc no wearing helmets' Scar, who has a helmet: 'Hi, Martyn!' 'oh mY GOd you scared me-' Payback for the jumpscare to Grian last series /lh /hj 'friends?' 'friends?' 'friends?' 'Helloooooo!' 'Martyn!' Idk why but that interaction made me exhale like- just imagine shouting through the walls in a cave to your friends irl. Omg now I'm imagining it with the reverb- 'you couldn't spare a heart, could you?' gives off the vibes of 'please sir, could I have some more?' Oliver Twist who? /lhj Bdubs and his chainmail lol 'THERE'S A SPAWNER?!' yeah...he's definitely having a rough first session- o7 'what is happening out there-?' I'd like to know too, Martyn, unfortunately I haven't watched their POVs yet. Also Etho saying 'BDUBS RUN! HIDE!' I- I'm normal about c!Ethubs I promise- 'YOU GOT HORSE ARMOR?!' ofc the local horsegirl /lhhj would ask about that lol- NOT ETHO TURNING INTO CANADIAN DAVID ATTENBOROUGH AND NARRATING HIS, MARTYN'S, AND BDUBS' ADVENTURES THROUGH THE CAVE- I- 💀 'this could go viral' true, Bdubs lol. BDUBS' MIC CUTTING OUT I'M CRYING- Gem's reaction of 'a what?!' and Scott's response of 'we just don't have a healer' is just perfect lol. Love that. WE'RE PLAYING THE MARTYN GETS NERFED MOD! TODAY WE CODED IT SO ALL THE MOBS ATTACK MARTYN AND ONLY MARTYN! that's the vibes Scott's comment gave me lol- 12 HEARTS?!? MARTYN!! OMG BE MORE CAREFUL!!! This Martyn nerf hitting hard- 'this could be really bad if I get poisoned-' YES IT COULD, MARTYN, YOU'RE ALREADY AT 12 HEARTS- IT'S LIKE YOU'RE TRYING TO BE THE FIRST TO YELLOW- /lh bro Martyn being risky is making my anxiety go 📈📈📈📈📈 BE MORE CAREFUL, MARTYN, PLS- I BEG OF U- MARTYN GOING TO THE NETHER- 📈📈📈 MARTYN THERE ARE GHASTS- PLEASE- I- AAAAAAAAAAAAA! MARTYNNNN! OMG! IS HE ALWAYS THIS RISKY, USUAL MARTYN VIEWERS?! CUZ IF SO IDT I'M GONNA SURVIVE BINGING ALL THE LIFE SERIES- 'ughhh I swear, dude, I swear, I'm gonna cry!!!' I AM TOO, PLEASE STOP GETTING INTO DANGER, MARTYN- Martyn saying damnit is me the whole time he's out risking his hearts. My heart can't take this kind of pressure, Martyn please stop being so riskyyyy- 😭 nINE HEARTS- MARTYN!!!! Istg I'm not surviving this episode- my heart is just- 📈📈📈📈📈📈📈 his pICKAXE BROKE?! OH YOU'VE GOTTA BE KIDDING ME! 'OH MY GOD, THE SUN!' I'M HAPPY TOO, HOPEFULLY HE DOESN'T LOSE TOO MANY MORE HEARTS. 'I've been to the nether and everything!' Yeah, imma be honest, I don't get that one. Like, didn't you write a song lITERALLY CALLED 'Screw The Nether' with friends????! /lh Lizzie's 'oh wow' 💀 fIVE AND A HALF HEARTS!! MARTYNNNN!!! OMG! 📈📈📈 NOT THE DROWNED- 😭 LEAVE HIM ALONE, BRUH, HE JUST TRYNA SURVIVE- Martyn panicking- same, bestie- Lizzie just like 'oh you stole my bed? Didn't notice' 💀 #1 way to tempt a horsegirl: offer something to protect his horse /lhj Cleo's laugh lol- infectious. MARTYN ZOOMING IN AND JIMMY JUST BRINGING BACK SCAR'S CAMEL IN THE BACKGROUND I CAN'T-"

OK I'm posting this and I'll rb for the other POVs, but Cleo's next.

So let's see, next rb is probably gonna be Cleo, Gem, Tango, Scott, Bdubs, and Pearl.

Third rb is probably gonna be Etho, Joel, Lizzie, Impulse, and BigB.

3 maybe 4 rb max.

[memryse]

i'm about halfway through mcc9 pink parrots, i'm having such a good time watching and i haven't even gotten to survival games yet lol

the entire stream was a casual charity stream for grian because he heard about a fundraiser to build a preschool and immediately decided to get involved. plus his teammates constantly encouraging viewers to go over and donate to him

the team already being at inside joke level with the lordships before any of the games even started. it's always fun to watch teams who are purely and simply in it for a good time

them not realising what the l'manberg revolutionary skins were, mistaking then for pirates and wondering if they'd missed a memo about themed skins

grian saying he doesn't really know joel and wants to get to know him better hits differently post-3rd life. they're friends!! :D

martyn is truly such a good addition to any team. any series, in fact. he brings such a good atmosphere to everything, i would enjoy anything featuring him i think.

the bit during parkour warrior where they were all ribbing joel for doing well was really funny to me lol. i gotta say tho seeing how stressful that game was for grian i'm glad it's been removed now - it was great for a few people but just pure frustration if you got stuck on a level.

[writing-the-end]

LoL Chapter 15- Enemies or Allies

Masterpost

A Wizard Hermits tale (AU belongs to @theguardiansofredland )

Back in the capitol, Milliara, the hermits discover they aren’t the only ones who have entered the Chimaera’s Championship as a non-guild team. New faces with similar ideas, or new enemies to take on? 

Ecto belongs to @cooler-cactus-block

Red belongs to @theguardiansofredland

___________________________________________________

“Did you really register us as team STAR?” Grian mumbles, glaring over at Doc. They never should trust a puppet mage. “We’re the hermits, not some silly dodgeball team.” 

“They know we’re a guild as the hermits. A guild that isn’t legal. At least now they won’t be suspecting us.” Doc takes the scroll, passing it off to TFC. Milliara was busy, busier than he’s ever seen it. The championship brought people from all over Lairyon, here to see the best mages compete for glory, gold, and good times. “Come on, now that we’re checked in we can go to the accommodations.” 

“I was wondering why our packs were so light.” Mumbo hums. “I don’t have to carry my own bed and home.” 

“Thank the gods.” Tango breathes. He likes camping out with the other hermits, but having to carry the tents and bedrolls long distances is a pain. He hurries to catch up with Impulse and BDubs, chittering about what events they plan on doing. It feels weird, walking down the streets of Milliara after last time they were here. Welcomed back as a team, after Magistrate Dolios threw them out and told them to disband as a guild. Tango winces, remembering the cape in Dolios’s dark office. He’s not losing another guild, not like Impulse, Zedaph, and he has before. 

They round the corner, walking over a raised bridge that rises above a swamp canal, spotting the inn they were given. It’s made of old, weathered wood, almost no windows on the bottom floor. One window on the top floor is broken. The building looks to be leaning, only propped up by the chimney at this point. TFC shrugs. Better a roof over his head than sleeping in a tent. He marches towards the door, invoking the others to join him.

“Here we ar-” TFC is cut off as soon as he opens the door, heat blasting his face and hot magma  illuminating the tavern of the inn. Water splashes the group, followed by a shout. 

“Mitch! You’re gonna burn the whole town down!” A kipling yells, sending a wave over the lava and forcing it to cool. 

“Jerome said the wood was magic tempered.” Mitch shrugs, looking over at the large creature at the bar. Someone the hermits can only assume is Jerome, who shrugs and returns to his drink. “So long as it didn’t burn you, what’s the harm?” 

“You did almost burn these people.” The kipling waves behind him, pointing at the hermits. The group can only stand in shock and a bit of fright. It...wasn’t exactly the nicest inn in Milliara. Far from that, in fact. The tavern was small, dark, with the only light coming from a dying fireplace. Barstools were rickety, the one holding up the fuzzy beast hardly taking his massive size. Chairs were held together with glue, mismatched around each different table. A bartender cleans varying mugs, no set complete. Only six other people are in the tavern, including Mitch, Jerome, and the kipling. 

“Uhhh, hello?” Wels’s response is more of a question than a statement. “Are...are you competitors for the Chimaera’s Championship as well?”

“We were ssssstarting to think we were the only team that wasssss boarded up in the lossssserssss cabin.” Joe leaps back, alarmed as a talking snake slithers past him. The snake climbs up the cooled lava, curling up next to the fireplace. To the hermits’ surprise, the snake becomes a man, stretched out in front of the warmth. 

“Is that what this place is?” Doc grumbles, looking around. He’s stolen from beggers richer than this. 

Next to Jerome, one of the mages stands. A brown mop of hair frames a boisterous face, childish eyes hidden behind tinted glasses. “Don’t listen to my friends. They’re just a little hyper. I’m Sky, these idiots behind me are Quentin,” 

“Hey!” Quentin retorts to the idiot label, but Sky isn’t listening. 

“The hothead is Mitch, and his friend Jerome.” Sky points out the ginger haired flame mage, who’s doing his best to clean up the cooled magma. Lucky for him, he’s got the help of Jerome, who’s own earth magic handles the rock easily. “Ty is the snake.”

“I’m a basilisk, dude.” Ty sits up, eyes sharpening into a challenge for the gloved leader. 

“Still a snake, in a way. Whatever, there’s also Jason-” He points out the last person, reclined in a chair with his feet on the table. He winks and salutes hello, not getting up from his perch. “And...uh, where’s Ssundee?” 

“Last I saw him he was out in our room, tinkering with stuff.” Quentin nods to the stairs. 

Cleo furrows her eyebrows. “The window was broken open in one of the rooms above.” 

“Ah, so he’s out shopping.” Quentin sighs, stepping over Mitch and Jerome as they clean up and flopping down in a chair.

The hermits squeeze in, retrieving keys from the innkeeper. Groups pair up to find bedspace, their meager supplies tossed into their rooms before returning to the tavern floor. A few remain upstairs, taking the time to rest. 

Once he’s downstairs and settled, BDubs frowns, looking at his drink as he’s hit with the aftertaste. He knows a thing or two about ale, and this tastes like swill. “They really put us up in, like, the worst place possible.” 

“I think they did that to every team. You know, we aren’t quite as important to be a guild, to get the good accommodations.” Quentin mutters, pouring out his drink and watching it foam on the floor. Disgusting. “But you guys...you’re big. How’re you not a guild already?” 

“Let’s just say the magistrate doesn’t really like us.” Grian sighs, flopping across his chair in an awkward position. Surely not the way a chair was designed to be sat in. 

“Screw that guy.” Everyone looks up, quite surprised to hear Ty hiss out his words. To say such a negative thing about Magistrate Dolios, in the open. What if an arcane guard walked by? “He thinks he’s so high and mighty, so perfect. It’s annoying.” 

“Things...have changed since that man came to power.” Jerome adds. 

“That’s right, your kind lives much longer than most species.” Xisuma leans forward. 

“Mhhmm,” he scratches at the crown of his head, fur petting across fur. “Guilds aren’t what they used to be. Guilds used to be just groups of friends, or maybe organizations with likeminded interests. Anything could be a guild, anyone could be a guildmember. Now...now it’s a status symbol for the wealthy and powerful.” 

Xisuma glances around, seeing other hermits nodding. He itches to tell their fellow competitors their plan, but Doc’s red robotic eye keeps him silent. He knows that what they’re about to do is treason. No one else needs to know about it. They could rat them out, and then Dolios will have every reason to arrest them. 

“I’m just glad we get to compete in the games!” Scar cheers, earning a chorus of agreement and a few toasts. “What do you think changed the Council’s mind to let teams compete?” 

“I...I’ve been wondering that as well.” Doc growls. Why all of a sudden now? The games have been closed to guilds only for years, and now the Council is letting anyone join in? It seems unusual. But it doesn’t matter- this is the perfect coverup. He looks around, pushing the thoughts out of his head. He needs to focus on planning the heist. It needs to go off without a hitch. They have no room for error. “I thought I saw another nonguild team joined? Have they been boarded up here as well?” 

Sky shrugs, tapping his gloved fingers against the pewter cup. “We haven’t seen anyone but you guys.” 

“Do you think they flaked out?” Etho appears suddenly, reclining in a chair as he appears from the shadows around it. The other group, who have called themselves Team Crafted, all leap in surprise by his arrival. The hermits have grown used to his shenanigans by now. “Or maybe the guilds intimidated them into quitting.” 

The talking continues, but Doc has retreated into his own conversation. As welcoming as it is to meet another group of mages who seem just as frustrated as them about the Council and their restrictions. But can they be trusted? He’s learned a thing or two about trust, his time spent as a criminal and a rebel. They may all be laughing and sharing this horrible beer now, but come tomorrow, come the tournament, and they will do anything to win. He doesn’t know if they’re to be trusted as allies, so he’ll see them as enemies. 

The door crashes open, jolting Doc out of his mind. Across the way, Jerome sighs, putting his head in his hands. “Ssundee, what have we told you about kicking doors?” 

“I found new friends!” The person in the doorway skips in, black curls bouncing alongside a five-oclock shadow. Brown overalls are stained with oil, as are blue gloves. “Though it seems like you guys found even more.” 

“And that’s Ssundee.” Sky states, finally able to reconcile with his whole team. “Ssundee, this is the Team STAR. They’re competing in the championship as well.” 

“Oh, so you’re the last nonguild team that signed up!” Ssundee surges forward, eyes glimmering with excitement, curious to see everyone. 

“Last? What about the third group?” Iskall tilts his head. 

“Those are my new friends!” Ssundee waves to the open door, where three figures stand in the precipice between sunlight and the dark tavern. Iskall raises his eyebrows, watching as the shortest one joins Ssundee’s side. They already look like best friends, even though they’ve hardly known each other. The other two enter in, the tallest closing the door behind her quite abruptly. 

“Three people? That’s not a very big team.” Grian questions, sitting up to get a good look at the trio. It’s an odd mix, three very different people and three very different attitudes. 

“We’re the wanderers! I’m Red,” The short kipling motions to himself, smiling. “And my friends are Ecto and Avon.” Red motions to each one. Ecto offers a short wave, a coy smile appearing on her face from under a brown hood. The last one doesn’t respond, sticking to the corner. Grian’s eyes widen as he notices that the last has massive black wings. What kind of magic is that? 

“So this is everyone who dares go against the guilds?” TFC looks at the eclectic bunch. He can’t help but laugh, shaking his head as the wanderers scrabble up the stairs and over one another. And he thought the hermits were a strange team. “They won’t know what’s coming for them.”

[starstress]

MCC Aqua Axolotls Live Commentary!

Hello, as said, I will attempt to write down my thoughts and reactions during the MCC. 

Stream links!!

False: https://www.twitch.tv/falsesymmetry

Ren: https://www.twitch.tv/rendogtv

Grian (yes, he’s streaming): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YjkgnEi4t9g

Pearl: https://www.twitch.tv/pearlescentmoon

Updates will come as edits, so be sure to check this again every once in a while if you’re interested or just curious! 

To all fans, please be kind to everyone, no matter the team or who you wish would win. You will only embarrass yourself if you harass others or act immaturely and will gain no brownie points with those you follow and watch.

For now, may the games begin and the best team win!

-

Edit 1: Peeps are running a bit late, apparently, Ren is the only one on the team with no aqua colour XD Grian recoloured the headband that Smajor had made for him last stream XD

Andddd, we’re kicking off!!

-

Edit 2: The gong makes an appearance!! Also, the story of the gong!! Grian had bought it as a gag for whenever he and Mumbo record! The team loves it!

Countdown has finally started!

-

Edit 3: The first game is Skyblockle(?)!! Team ain’t feeling too confident about it, but we’ll see! I think they’ll be okay at this. Gri is reading the instructions and getting nervous XD

From now, everything will be under the cut. Warning, it’s really long.

Oof, wood fell in the lava. They still have more :)) They’re sharing tasks pretty nicely, I have to say, but they keep changing plans. Things will heat up quickly, tho, and I’m glad this game is gonna be out of the way soon.

First death in Skyblockle for the Aqua Axolotls: False! Second: Grian!

Doom is on the horizon XD

Rip, Ren has died too, and Pearl has gotten a couple of kills!! 

And the Axolotls are out!

First gong after a game. Rn we’re all watching the other teams. Dream team is holding up well. Techno’s team is out too. Last bid!

Endgame: Pearl has won the most coins, team is a bit disappointing by last place.

-

Edit 4: They have the Uno Reserve card as they were the worst team. 

Game: Bingo but Fast!

Gri is reading the instructions again. Someone in Pearl’s stream is watching 25 streams holy dandelions.

The team is again sharing tasks. This is pretty speedy!

Hearing Gri lament how speedy it all is is so funny. Also, they’re all like headless chickens and a lot more disorganized now. Poor team.

Endgame: Ren’s sweating in unspeakable places lol, but they’re not last anymore!

Pearl’s game just crashed, oh goodness.She’s back in, wooo!

-

Edit 5: Game: Battle box!

Gri is going for the middle. Pearl got so many kills!

First round won!!

Second round lost!

Third round won!!

Ren’s having a hard time breathing, and I gotta say same! 4th place rn.

Game was paused to stop the animations of the NPCs and we got another gong! we chilling for a few mins lol.

WE’RE ON AGAINST THE DREAM TEAM. Aww, the game needs to be reset or smt. 

Oh wow, draw for every team. Fourth round was skipped.

Fifth round - uh SERVER CRASHED

Wowie, the map looks really strange without the resource pack.

First hiccup in 7 event, dang. 

Starting again. Resource pack might no re-appear again. And now I’m laggy, lol

Round 1: lost!

Round 2: won! Gri with the tnt :D

Round 3: lost! tnt did not work this time

Round 4: unknown due to lag, oof.

Round 5: lost

Round 6: unknown 

Round 7: unknown

Round 8: unknown

Round 9: unknown (prob lost)

Place: Last.

Everyone’s laggy, including me lol.

The viewers are being encouraging, which is really great and wholesome!

-

Edit 6: Game: Big Sales at Build Market!

Team is confident about this one, wooo!!

Grian ended up in plants lol. Ughhh, diorate. Communication is key, and it’s very well done!!

They’re building fast and getting resources pretty fast, that’s good.

Grian listing what they need is *chef kiss* False being alert is *hearteyes* and the chats are the real mvps 

Endgame: Place 7. It was pretty intense indeed.

Break time!

-

Edit 7: Audience takeover!! Pearl wants Rocket Spleef, so does Techno. Dream wants Hole in the Wall.

Game: Rocket Spleef!!

Grian’s reading instructions :))) 

This will be intense as all heck. Countdown has stopped, huh.

Oof, apparently it was supposed to be Hole in the Wall, but can’t change. Gri’s prob not gonna have as great of a time as I’d hopped :P

Round 1: Rainbow map, False is out! :o The very first time! Team’s out right before tnt time! Place 6, nice.

Round 2: Uhh, Atoms map?? Grian and Pearl are struggling. Pearl’s out! Gri’s out! Ren’s out! False’s still going.

Round 3: Grian’s finally got the rocket jump. Jump and then launch :D Or maybe not XD Tnt time! Pearl is waiting down at the bottom. She fell, oof. Grian’s having cramps in his hand and, in his words, he’s ‘a goner.’

Endgame: False’s the master of Rocket Spleef! And place 6! Team really enjoyed it, I’m so glad :D

-

Edit 8: Team’s hoping for Ace Race, and it looks like it might be!

Game: Ace Race!

Grian is narrating for all of us, nice! “This is totally Sonic!” he says!

“’Your first time will probably suck’. Yeah, that’s been happening about the entire time!” lmao

Omg, the map is so cool!! Def a fan favourite!! The entire team is having so much fun yesss

All of them are really doing good, Grian and False are placing good.

“Techno, get outta my way!!” -  Gri, and I have to say, mood.

Grian got place 15! Right behind Techno, nice!!

Pearl is 32!

Ren is 35?

False is somewhere behind Gri, but way before Pearl.

Endgame: Everyone had one heck of a time and now they’re trying to find out how to make it in Vanilla Minecraft XD

Place: 9 

-

Edit 9: They dunked the Lime Llamas XDD

Game: Sands of Time

Oof, this one’s gonna be a maker or a breaker.

Oh goodness, they have no one watching the time D:

They’re banking coins, thankfully. 

Oh no, Pearl!! Sand is needed. Grian to the rescue!

Phew, three sand left, thank you Pearl for topping up!!

Intense, gosh, i’m really nervous about the sand!!

Oof, Pearl’s stream froze. It ended, oh no. Actually, it might just be me that has enormous lag (not smt new lol). 

There we go, slow but it’s something.

The sand!! Aww man, right as Pearl got the sand!! They’re out! At least they banked a lot of their coins.

Endgame: We got a nice gong. Place: 5! Overall place: 9!

-

Edit 10: My wi-fi is beating me up with a stick, and it’s unrelenting. Lag is my life now.

Last game: Hole in the Wall

Ren’s gonna have a bad time XD

Round 1: Pearl’s fallen, from what my laggy video will show me. Gri as well. They’re out!

Round 2: Pearl’s still alive, woo!! Glitched right through one, so cool XD

Round 3: lag.

Endgame: Ren’s raging, Grian is really amused by that XD Nice game!! 

-

Edit 11:

Overall place: 9

Time for the final battle!! Gong! Ren wants the gong as stream sound effect :D

Green Guardians vs Orange Ocelots! 

Grian supports Techno bc Techno said he liked him lmao!! The others are Green. 

Also fun fact: Grian could coach a match of dodge ball!

Round 1: Green wins!

Round 2: Orange wins!! Techno’s taking them out!

Round 3: Orange wins!

Round 4: Orange wins!

Grian: “It’s like one of those anime moments!”

Round 5: Green wins!

(Gri went off holy heck)

Congrats to the Green Guardians!!  

- 

Last edit of the night!

That was extremely fun to watch!! The lag and my own wi-fi made it a bit irritating at times, esp since I had to split my focus, but it was pretty good nonetheless.

It’s really sad that the Championship itself lagged so much, I have a feeling it left both a lot of viewers and players feeling frustrated as well. 

However, the new mini game was lots of fun and I have a feeling we’ll be seeing it a lot in the future. I really hope we will.

The team was really good, they managed to coordinate very well, but like many groups who’ve just started working together for the first time, there were times where they could’ve slowed down a bit and reconsidered their plans. Still, the important bit was that they all had a great time together.

Overall, I really hope Grian and Pearl will participate again, even if not on the same teams. I also hope that there will be more Hermitcraft members joining in, even if only for one Championship. I had tons of fun writing this as well, but I think I’ll switch back to occasional posts about amusing things that happen during the games, as it really took a lot of my attention from the mcc itself.

Hope whoever kept up with me or reads this later enjoyed/enjoys this. I’m off to bed now, I’m sleepy and I’ll prob wake up, read through this, and find 10 million little mistakes that I’ll die over. Future me, I deeply apologize, but, uhhhh, no regrets!!

Starstress out!

[go-learn-esperanto]

He's got it. Good for him :)

Pete’s Nightbot !mcc command 

I care they so much ;-; 

[riacte]

@creamercrumble @maewinter @myceliumresistance I’m glad we all think the same

Also the possibilities whhcjwbdjwjs:

-

False:

Grian:

False: Hey you know what? You know what, Grian? Other hermits are watching my stream. Including Ren and Doc. The resistance members are supporting me. They’re not watching YOUR stream. See? Ren’s going “go falsie <3” Har har, Mother Spore.

Grian: *spluttering* thATS BECAUSE I STREAM ON YOUTUBE AND THEY ALL HAVE TWITCH ACCOUNTS—

-

Kara: So, let me get this straight, you guys are having a war over... grass?

Grian and False: Yup

Pete: ... And you guys actually elected your grass loving mayor??

Grian: yeah I was Mumbo’s campaign manager but we both voted for Scar lol

False: I was actually another mayoral candidate

Pete: ... so Grian voted FOR Scar then immediately started a resistance against him? And False lost the race against Scar but ended up... joining his side??

Grian and False: yeah that’s about right

Kara: ... do you see the flaws in the logic

Grian, whispering to False: maybe we didn’t think the plot through

Pete: ... I present to you: one of my favourite teams...

-

Imagine like major Hermitcraft drama goes on during MCC. And Grian’s chat is being spammed with “HEP INFILTRATING THE HQ!!” and he’s so distracted.

Grian: :/ Falsie is this your tactic?? Occupy the Mother Spore with MCC so he can’t defend the HQ when the HEP tries to sneak in? That’s cheeky—

False, who also has no idea what’s happening: the HEP are doing what now

Anyways the two of them start mildly panicking at missing out important plot while they struggle with MCC stress. It ends when Cub donates money to False so she can see/hear the message of “INFILTRATION POSTPONED. STOP BEING DISTRACTED. WIN THE MCC much love, the hermits <33”

-

Grian: I guess it’s time to bring out the gong

Pete and Kara: ??????

False, nodding like this is totally normal: Ah yes, the gong. Send me the Amazon link please?

Pete and Kara: ??????????

-

False dies in Sands of Time. Kara, experienced sand keeper, immediately revives her.

False: Well, that was a lot faster than Ren last time haha

And we hear Grian holding back his laughter in the distance. Ren, who’s probably watching the stream, is face palming.

-

Grian: WOOHOO WE GOT INTO DODGEBOLT 1V4 FALSIE LET’S GO!! Just pretend you’re shooting resistance members lol

False: *misses*

Pete, who’s learned from their banter: Pretend they’re all Grian

False: *shoots all four players*

And now Grian’s torn between being utterly delighted, insulted, annoyed, and at the same ecstatic.

You know what would be funny? Imagine if mere hours before MCC13, some big HEP/Resistance drama happens, like maybe False kills/imprisons the Mother Spore Grian or False dies in the Resistance’s base.

And like six hours later the two have to get together for MCC and they pretend they hadn’t had the most intense fake battle on Hermitcraft just now.