#giving myself a pep talk lol

[illegiblehandwriting1]

GOOD MORNING Y'ALL i woke up at o'dark thirty, got caffeinated, spent a few hours reading and now i am ready to make Sky's life a living hell :D cuz today is WRITING DAY even if i don't feel like it i gotta start, gotta go down the rabbit hole and get in the zone, gotta make some BIG DECISIONS cuz how the fuck do i want this to go lmao

worst part is that i think i know how i want ch17 to end but just the general gist of it, not the actual details but we'll figure it out!

[ambrosiagourmet]

I truly cannot emphasize enough how helpful it is to block people. If you find yourself repeatedly getting upset or frustrated by a certain idea/character interpretation/negative opinion/ship/WHATEVER then start blocking people when you come across it. Or at least try to filter it. Tumblr has both tag and content filters, so you can catch a lot of stuff, even untagged stuff, with that.

You don’t owe anyone your attention. It doesn’t make you smarter, kinder, more engaged, less judgmental, or better at fandom to continually expose yourself to takes you blatantly disagree with. It also doesn’t make those takes More Wrong.

I don’t think it’s bad to talk about ideas you disagree with! I don’t think there’s anything wrong with noticing and discussing fandom trends, or needing to vent about posts that hit a nerve. Anger and frustration aren’t inherently toxic. But I also think it can be easy to get stuck in the idea that there’s something inherently good, or helpful, about continuing to engage with people and topics that get you worked up. The anger or spite or whatever doesn’t actually fill you up, even if it feels enticing and delicious at the time.

Personally, I find that it helps to remember that a post is really just the smallest slice of a person. It’s not all of who they are, and it’s not connected to them - when you mad at a post, you aren’t interacting with the person who made it. You are interacting with an idea. And if the idea makes you feel bad, if it gets you worked up and upset, then the impact on you is disproportionately WAY bigger than the person who made it. Not to mention… You might not even be reacting to something they actually intended to say. Like I said - it’s just a slice.

So yeah. Block liberally, filter, try not to get sucked into re-exposing yourself to prove a point (to yourself or others). Block and try and move on. I understand that it may be hard to believe that it will make anything feel better, but it really does. If you can get literal space from the negative stimuli, it doesn’t actually take that long to appreciate the mental and emotional space as well. And even if you get sucked back in later… at least you will have had a break in the meantime.

[happyheidi]

Dr Heidi,

A secret, you say?

No one knows me entirely. I hide my political beliefs from this person, religious beliefs from that person, a prominent hobby from that person. These people are all the closest people in my life to me, and I keep something from all of them. Sometimes I tell myself it's to keep the peace. Or keep them from bothering me. But really I think it's because I'm scared. I had to hide myself when I was younger and in some ways I've never stopped. I've been working on it. I've quit lying so much, and I keep fewer secrets. But I do keep them.

How do you face the mortifying ordeal of being known? How do I become brave enough go share my truths with people I claim to love? (That I do love) (But selfishly. They confide their truths to me and I pretend I'm telling them all of mine in return) (how long until one of them discovers a truth? It's been years. My mother has known me my whole life. My best friend, over a decade. Others, several years) (how do I fess up my secrets?)

Damn this is almost like reading an ask from myself. I keep lots to myself. I don’t usually share things either. I keep way too much in, so I’m kinda asking the same thing as you. BUT I see no harm in keeping certain things from others but hmm..

it’s tricky… cus when u share, u bare. and that is scary. you wouldn’t want to be judged by who you actually are, so why allow yourself to be judged at all? I totally understand it. One has to be brave to be seen like that. If that makes sense? So you’re careful as to what u put out there to potentially be “judged” but not the innermost YOU.

You can try with smaller truths. Spread them out with your family and friends and see how they react (don’t go with the politic at first cus that’s the toughest thing and what brings most arguments etc) but small things u share that’s really TRUE to you. Then more and more over time. I think it’s important to keep something to yourself tho! Don’t think this helped so much but it’s good to just get things of ur chest! Hope u start sharing a little bit this year. ❤️

It’s so interesting how so many of these asks are relatable to (I’ve started answering many but ended up saving them to drafts; so sorry if I haven’t answered yours but I relate so damn much to so many of you !!)

[griseldabanks]

Once again, Foster Family AU and Cosmic Eclipse for the kick-in-the-pants writing ask but also Take Me Beyond too, please!

Foster Family AU: 117 words!

Shooting her an unimpressed look, Riza finally took a sip of her coffee. “And here I thought you might actually give me some encouragement.” “Hey, I meant it as a compliment!” “Really? Because here I thought you were just calling us all strange.”

Cosmic Eclipse: 152 words!

And there, quieter than his voice, but still easy for Sherlock to hear, a constant tapping noise. Like John was fiddling with the zipper or buttons on his coat, tapping his fingernail against them.... Three short taps, three long taps, three short taps. Dot dot dot. Dash dash dash. Dot dot dot. S.O.S.

Take Me Beyond: 108 words!

This was all he’d ever wanted. Just to be close to her, to hold her, and oh, he loved her so much, his heart was full of it, pounding fit to burst, rising up in his throat till he couldn’t breathe with how much he wanted this, wanted her, and…. He couldn’t breathe. Oh. He couldn’t breathe.

Kick-in-the-Pants Writer's Ask Game

[killuaisaprincess]

reminder GONKI IS MORE CANON 😤😏 so anytime some kg person tries to send hate at you remember it’s just cuz they’re big mad Gonki more canon eheheh 😘🤭

[jemandtherobots]

am going through something really strange at work where i'm finding myself able to sit down and tell myself to do a task and then i'll?? do the task???? i wish i knew what's causing this, bcos this is not normal for me, but either way i am enjoying this new able-to-do-my-job version of me, very useful for doing my job.

[natandacat]

btw im feeling a lot today bc my neighbor is having a bbq and i really wanna go but i had to lie and say i was working bc everyone there is a hardcore party goer and theres too many covid cases rn so even in an outdoor setting i would need to mask and that crowd would be super weirded out by my n95 and also it would suck bc i wouldnt even be able to eat. anyway. being at risk is like living in purgatory while 99% of the population literally doesnt care.

[notveryshrugemoji]

The 8-9:30pm anxiety spiral? -2/10, would not recommend. I was really triggered this morning and worked through it well enough to start work in a good headspace. Little wins.

[quasieli]

I was really trying to avoid the monetizing my hobby thing but I need all the help I can get to hopefully get my own place soon. If I offered out $20 icon commissions, would anyone be interested?

[wishingprince]

I hate hate missing work but I have like the one job out there that genuinely wants me to take time off when I’m sick so I’m trying really hard not to feel too guilty about taking off today and tomorrow. I’ve been sick for two fucking weeks already and only took off two days last week and I just want to do everything possible to get better and not make this last longer which means not forcing myself to keep working when I’m not ready yet.

[vaguely-concerned]

My two cents on how much of Mind!Varric is Rook’s mind trying to fill the blank space and how much is Solas actively talking through a convenient blood magic paper doll of the mind: I think it's a mix of both, a truly collaborative psychosocial horrorshow if you would, but waaaay more towards the second. It feels too directed and tactical at times to be anything else. Rook's mind is willing to go along with the denial phase as far as it can fucking carry them to not have to face the grief and regret and does its part in papering over details that don’t make any sense, the way brains will strive to create coherent meaning even out of deeply confusing input, but to my understanding it's a collaborateur in how that plays out, not the instigator or control center. Solas is using it as a path to agency and to gather insight into Rook as a person unguarded as he can't count on in his own guise. (That stoic option that leads to him being like 'oh I see you're cautiously denying me access to your inner life. well. at least you still have Varric to talk to. y'know as an outlet :)'. You absolute BITCH Solas! That alone convinced me that he HAS to have an active hand in it on some level.)

My guess is that it takes considerable effort on Solas’ part to make Mind!Varric do anything more involved or complicated than seeming to sit up in bed and give casual commentary, and that’s why he keeps having eerie five minute shallow pep talks with you before he announces he conveniently needs a nap aaanyway good luck kid you got this haha. When he’s just spouting NPC lines from his bedrest, I’m ready to believe that could be Rook’s mind being allowed to improv lines for him more freely because it’s less about Solas trying to get something out of them or working an angle and more ‘Still here! Still totally alive and fine and the mentor figure you know and love and trust :) don’t even worry about it! Thankfully there is no war in Ba Sing Sei, as we all know’ upkeep work lol. Rook’s mind is allowed to set the tone of Varric, the outlines, but not always the content. 

AND, on a (beautifully fucked up) character psychology level, I feel like Solas is indulging in actually getting to be the good supportive mentor figure to Rook with one hand to assuage the guilt he feels about what he's done -- and what he's going to do -- to them with the other. Same internal logic as he uses in Trespasser about the Qun. ‘Almost everyone is going to die from the course of action I’m doggedly pursuing eventually. But at least I can make their last years happier and freer and kinder than they would have been otherwise. and that kind of makes up for it right. a little bit. doesn't it. doesn't that make it better at least. I need that to make it better)'. Did I really take your beloved mentor and friend from you if you don’t know yet that I did? Some philosophers would argue not really! So it’s probably almost ok actually. Isn’t it even a little noble that I’m taking all this grief and guilt on myself and shielding you for now. With undertones that I’m not sure he would realize himself (and might be mortified by if he did) that he is so incredibly lonely, and even a dishonest and indirect emotional connection is more than nothing when you’re that desperate. In this setup he gets idk. Both the control he craves so incredibly badly in relationships and over himself, and the scraps, the fading afterimages, of intimacy and warmth and companionship, even second hand. The one thing Solas and Rook agree on deep deep down is that they really wish Varric weren't gone. They're handshake memeing this in the saddest and most creepy way possible.

I think an important element too is that Solas needs Rook and their team to *succeed* —  up to a certain point. He needs someone to hold the two other elven mean girls off until he can get out of here. Ideally, in a perfect world, even do all the hard work of killing them so he can swoop in at the end and do his thing when both sides are exhausted and out of resources to stop him, and then Bob’s your uncle! Same logic as he was using with Corypheus, and after that worked out so well, too! King of choosing to never learn from a single solitary mistake he’s ever made even though i fully believe he could have the capacity to Fen’Harel <3 The underlying idea isn’t flawed, you see, it was just unforeseen circumstances getting in the way. This time for sure it’ll all work out the way I cleverly imagined it in my head beforehand. Cue By Talos this can’t be happening etc. in the form of a statue almost crushing him like a bug. 

So he's providing guidance and forging Rook into a leader from two angles: one Rook might not trust, and one they probably will. Shaping them into what he needs slowly and carefully. He’s helping you hone your team into their most effective state, as he might have done with his own agents back in the day, setting up his chess pieces even if he has to squint through two glimpsed realities to do it haha. Pincer maneuver of an insidious stealth mentor you never asked for. Also… at one point mind Varric gives you a whole little monologue about how Solas' problem is that he’s always seen his interpersonal connections as flaws and see where it’s landed him, all alone and the worst part? it hasn’t even worked. it’s all been for nothing he’s back where he began with nothing to show for it but his mistakes. Like...that has such strong 'uh okay happy to play your therapist from two rooms away here what the fuck kind of traumadump is this' energy to me, I’m not sure Rook like. Thinks that much about Solas as a private person. So much of Solas' self-loathing and futile insights into his own flaws seem to shine through in Mind!Varric's dialogue all the time — I just can't believe that there's no guiding hand behind it as it were. 

Most of all. I feel like people underestimate the degree to which Solas is incredibly funny. As in, he has a very consistent and recognizable sense of humour. It’s one of my very favourite things about him. We must remember — it is crucial that we always keep in mind — Orlesian accent and wig Solas from May The Dread Wolf Take You (my beloved, the explanation for why I love this dude even with the. All of the everything else. No one does it quite like him). He is not at all above doing things or adding little flourishes for his own obscure amusement, in fact that seems to me to be one of his most consistent traits. The Randy Dowager Quarterly comment Varric has? The ‘Maybe this is the Dread Wolf’s revenge. Forcing us to house sit for him’ thing? To Me this is 100% Solas amusing himself in his boring Fade jail surrounded by the screaming hellscape of all his regrets. Source: it came to me as divine revelation through pure vibes trust me bro 

If nothing else I find it much more narratively interesting personally if the connection between Rook and Solas really is that defenselessly intimate and entwined (and so unbalanced!), and the sense of violation and invasion and betrayal afterwards consequently all the more nauseatingly intense. Even if you kept him at arm’s length in the open, he’s been under your skin the whole time, looking around, gathering what he needs to destroy you, wearing the face of a friend. Regretfully, probably, but choosing to do it every step of the way anyway. (Sound familiar, Inquisitor? Solas doesn’t have that many tricks when you actually look at it, he keeps returning to old tried and true ones like a dog with a bone haha.) Maybe he even genuinely meant some of it as mercy, which only makes it so much worse. It makes his sin against his own core principles of autonomy and the freedom of all beings in mind, spirit and body so much more juicily grave if it’s something he pursues actively and consistently, rather than it half-falling into his lap as a happy accident mainly orchestrated by Rook’s own subconscious. Solas, too, is at his very lowest point, the closest to giving in and becoming his own antithesis fully that he’s ever been, and it makes the choice of whether you still reach out your hand to him one last time or not all the more impactful and difficult.

[ahgasegotarmy116]

Treat You | Jeon Jungkook | One Shot

Summary: You wanted to take Jungkook out this time around but things don't go according to plan Paring: f!reader x Jungkook (established relationship) Word Count: 1.6k~ short and sweet Warnings: Just some suggestive language but nothing crazy p.s. I wrote this in one sitting so hopefully it's okay lol Requested by an anon 💜

"Baby" Jungkook answers the phone, his gravelly morning voice sending shivers up my spine. "Did I wake you?" I coo, not expecting him to be sleeping this late making him hum in response. "I should probably get up now though" he says as I start to hear movement in the background. 

"Did you work late?" I ask, knowing he like to put in overtime when he can. "Yeah, just a few hours though" he says, making me hum. "Can I take you out today?" I offer, my heart fluttering even after all this time we've been together. "You wanna take me out?" he chuckles, the sound making me bite my lip. 

He's so fucking sexy in the morning and I'll never get over it.

"Yeah why not? It's been a while since I treated you" I say, hoping he'll bite. "You sure? You don't have to spend your money on me love" he says and I shake my head before remembering we're on the phone. 

"You always pay for everything so I wanna pay this time" I say, making my argument and he chuckles again, telling me he's giving in. "How could I say no when such a pretty girl is asking me out?" he agrees making me smile, the praise unexpected. 

"I'll pick you up at seven" I say but he tries to protest. "I can pick you up princess" he offers but I decline right away. "No. I'm taking you out so I'm driving" I say and he sighs. "I guess I forgot that my girl is so independent, letting me take care of her all the time" he says, his tone laced with something dangerous making me blush. 

"Um, I'll see you then...bye!" I rush to end the call, not wanting to give into asking to see him sooner. 

I want this date to be perfect, I want everything to be perfect.

~~~~~

After getting ready and giving myself a once over one more time I check my purse and see that I can't find my wallet. I furrow my brows, trying to remember the last time I saw it leaving me digging through my closet but after twenty minutes of searching I still come up empty handed. 

I pace back and forth in my room, trying to figure out where I could've left it if not in here but I can't seem to figure it out, leaving me huffing in defeat, looking at the clock and seeing that I'm gonna be late. 

I check inside my purse to see if I have any cash but only manage to find a twenty which is nowhere near enough to take him out to the restaurant I placed our dinner reservations at.

I do another once over and decide to admit defeat, seeing that I'm gonna have to make a change of plans and see if I can manage to take him out with what I have...

~~~~

"I was beginning to think you forgot about me" he chuckles when he sees me standing outside my car and holding the door open, showing up thirty minutes late. "You? Never" I tease leaving him giving me a kiss before sitting down, giving him the passenger princess role for the night.

I close the door once he's all settled in and take a deep breath, giving myself a small pep talk about how everything will be okay even if I can't take him where I wanted to. 

Once I get in I look over at him, the brave face that I told myself I would sport is replaced with a slightly pouty one making his brows pop up and immediately going to caress my face. 

"What's the matter baby?" he asks, brushing his thumb along the apple of my cheek. "I'm sorry, I should've been more responsible but I..." I start, cutting myself off, completely embarrassed that this is happening. "It's okay, just tell me" he coaxes me, making my eyes water. 

"I can't take you out tonight" I say, my voice so quiet he could barely hear it. "Why? What's wrong?" he says, worried that something might've happened. "I...I don't know where my card is so I don't have enough money to pay" I admit, looking down at my lap, trying to hide how upset this made me. 

I wanted to do something nice for him, something to show him how much I appreciate everything he's done for me but I couldn't even take him out for a nice dinner.

"Hey, it's okay" he says and brings my face back over to him. "No it's not okay. I wanted everything to be perfect! I wanted you to have a good time and I just messed it up. Now all I can afford to get you is some fast food burger like this is so embarrassing" I groan, slumping back in my chair and covering my face, hating that something like this is making me so upset. 

"Get out of the car" he says making me look at him like he's grown two heads. "Wha-?" "Come on get out of the car" he urges me and I do as he says. "What are yo-" "Switch places with me" he says and I follow without much of an argument since his behavior has caught me completely off guard. 

"Get in" he says, making me sit down and closing the door for me just like I had done for him a few minutes ago, completely motionless and confused, waiting for him to get into the driver's seat. 

"Jungkook what are you doing?" I ask he he hands me his phone. "Put in the address" he orders, his directions short and to the point. "Jungkook I don't have enough money to go there" I finally argue back. "And I don't care" he says making me question what's gotten into him.

"I don't wanna see you that upset over money ever again. I'm your boyfriend and I work hard to take care of you" he says and when I go to argue back he stops me. "You're my girlfriend and I take care of what's mine. We both dressed up to go out tonight so we're going out and that's final" he states but when I go to try tell him I don't want him to pay he jumps over top of me again. 

"End of discussion" he finishes, his jaw set and his eyes dark, daring me to argue with him but I just gulp and put in the address. 

~~~~~

The car ride is a bit quieter than normal after that, the low hum of the engine and the melody of our playlist coming through the speakers being the only sounds to keep us company. I turned to face away from him this time, my legs resting against the door instead of the center console making it impossible for him to rest his hand on my thigh, not wanting to give in after the way he talked to me. 

"Baby what's wrong?" he finally asks once we pull up to the restaurant, my silence going on for a lot longer than he had expected. "You didn't let me say anything" I mumble and he sighs, knowing he was definitely a lot more harsh than he needed to be. 

"I'm sorry honey I was...I was just really mad seeing you so stressed and upset over something that I could easily solve for you" he says and I hum, understanding his perspective but not appreciating the way he went about it...even if he did look really hot doing it. 

"You always pay for everything though. It makes me feel useless, like I'm just here to spend all of your money" I huff, finally admitting what's been bothering me for a while. 

"I don't see it as you spending my money. If anything you hardly ever ask me for anything so whenever you do say something I jump on it. I like getting you things and seeing that adorable look on your face when I know you love it makes it all worth it. Taking care of you makes me feel like I'm doing right by you so, please let me" he asks, explaining himself now, making me see things from his perspective. 

After taking a second to think about it and seeing the sincere look on his face I nod, accepting defeat because he'd do it anyways even if I said no. "Okay, just don't do it all the time" I say, poking his cheek and making him smile. 

"Deal, now let's go have a nice time together and forget about all of this. Then after we're done you can treat me tonight" he says, confusing me again. "But I told you I don't have money right now unless you want a milkshake or something after dinner" I say, offering that up but he chuckles darkly. 

"I wasn't talking about money princess" his eyes scan my body, taking in each and every inch of it making my skin crawl. "Did I tell you you look really pretty tonight?" he asks and I shake my head, unable to breathe with this heated tension that's grown between us. 

"You'll look even prettier on your knees for me tonight" he says, running his thumb across my bottom lip before getting out of the car and coming over to open my door for me.

"You can't just say things like that and expect me to sit through a whole dinner afterwards" I mumble before getting out of the car. "But I just did" he taunts and pulls me in by my hips before shamelessly feeling me up and kissing me before taking my hand and leading me towards the entrance. 

"You're impossible" I grumble making him laugh and snake his arm around my waist instead. "Impossibly handsome" he teases and kisses me on my cheek making me roll my eyes. "That too" I grumble and spend the rest of the dinner mentally preparing myself for the very, very long night ahead...

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[her-power]

just for tonight (Joseph Quinn x fem reader / one shot) 18+

warnings: adorable as well as smutty. I guess that sums it up!

summary: this is a one shot based on an interesting dream I had involving JQ & myself & a casino. my hyper-fixation heart couldn’t help it and wanted to turn it into a story. enjoy!

a/n: a new Eddie Munson series is in the works & fixation on the darkness II is in brainstorm mode!

word count: 2k? Maybe? I don’t know, I didn’t use my word document for this one lol

You wished you didn’t agree to go to this bachelorette party. You weren’t even in the wedding party but your friend who was a bridesmaid begged you to come because she couldn’t stand the maid of honor. Most Saturday nights you spent lounging on your couch with your cats, and a book on your lap. You felt like a grandma, but you were trying to be a good friend. The bride was in her early twenties, the rest of the party were in their mid twenties. You and your friend were the only ones who were thirty.

You really hated staying out late. It was almost 11 o’clock, you were sitting alone at the bar in the casino of the hotel you had to book. The bridal party wanted to head out to the next town to a bar that closed at 2am, that’s where you draw the line, you’d rather get drunk by yourself and then drag yourself to your hotel room. You were on your second tequila sunrise, which is a lot for you, playing candy crush on your phone, feeling eyes on you from drunk men who would walk by, preying on you. You could never take a compliment but you were pleased with how you looked tonight. A lightweight black mid sleeve dress adorned your curvy figure, went down to your ankles and had two slits up both sides of your legs. The bodice had a cut out diamond shape, exposing some of your sternum below your breasts. You didn’t wear a bra, the tie front of the bodice supported the girls delicately. You had finished your drink, and one magically appears in front of you.

You glance up at the bartender through your eyelashes. “I didn’t order that.” You say kindly.

“No, but the gentleman across the way did.” She tells you with a smirk and you glance behind her. Your breath hitches and butterflies fill your stomach; the most beautiful brown eyes stare back at you, smiling sweetly at you, holding up his glass as a hello. You have to close your mouth, you couldn’t believe someone as handsome as him had bought you a drink, and you couldn’t shake how familiar he looked to you. You clear your throat, digging through your wallet for a ten dollar bill, you hold it up, giving him a questioning, awkward smile. Casino drinks were way too over priced unless you were gambling. He laughs, and your nerves come back as he gets up from his seat and walks around the bar towards you. You rub your sweaty palms on your knees, your leg begins to bop uncontrollably as you feel his presence stand next to you.

You don’t look at him right away, but after giving yourself a little pep talk, remembering what your grandma said about men, you look up at him with a smile.

“I don’t want your money, love.” He’s English, his voice is nice, soft with a bit of a rasp. You realize you’re staring and laugh awkwardly, looking away and he smiles back at you, his cheeks dimpling.

“These drinks are way too overpriced.” You say quietly. “Please, take it.”

You move the bill towards him but he places his hand over yours, crumpling the bills under your hand and gently moves it away. You sigh, shaking your head, placing the money back in your wallet. “Okay, if you can afford it.”

“I can…I suppose.” He laughs softly.

You meet his eyes again, you were definitely a little drunk because you still couldn’t place why he was so familiar to you.

“May I sit?” He asks you and you nod. He slides on the bar stool next to you, his knee grazes yours slightly and you swear you can feel a current shoot down to your lower belly.

“Why did you buy me a drink?” You ask, a blush rising to your cheeks. “I mean, I look pretty pathetic, sitting alone at a bar while her friends are off galavanting somewhere else.”

He grins, perfect teeth. “I think you look pretty beautiful.”

You swallow a nervous laugh. “Oh.”

He cringes and chuckles. “I know, that was lame. I’m sorry.”

“Not lame, I just don’t know how to take a compliment.” You laugh, taking a swig off the drink. “It’s also my choice to sit alone at a bar. I didn’t feel like staying out til two a.m.”

“Ooof. Let me guess, bachelorette party?” He sips his own drink, leaning his head on his palm as he looks at you. You nod, taking another swig. “You seem nervous.”

“Nah.” You laugh a little too loudly and he stifles a giggle. “I’m just…I’m not used to…this. I mean…you’re just…I could just be drunk but, you’re insanely handsome.”

He rolls his eyes. “Oh stop.”

“You can’t take a compliment either!” You laugh, nudging his shoulder. You were loosening up, and part of you thinks it’s his calm energy, and obviously mixed with the alcohol.

Realizing you had knocked back your entire drink, you do the logical thing and order another one. The two of you got to talking, mostly about favorites, why he was there alone, if he gambled and if he had a favorite late night snack. He said his name was Joseph, or Joe. You had turned your body closer to his, the slit of your dress had fell down just the right way so your leg was exposed. You caught him subtly glancing that direction, a blush creeping up on his cheeks when he realized you saw him looking. You clear your throat, glancing at the time on your phone. It was after midnight.

Call it a night and get his number.

Invite him upstairs.

Listen to your grandma.

Invite him upstairs.

“Do you like scrabble?” You ask him, smiling at the silliness of the question.

“Like the game? Yeah…why?” He laughs.

“I have travel scrabble in my room and free alcohol. Whoever loses has to order dominoes.” You grin, your head was foggy but you weren’t that drunk where you couldn’t make consensual decisions.

“Okay, shouldn’t take long for me to win.” He winks at you and you roll your eyes. You both pay your respective tabs and exit the casino, the two of you walk towards the elevator but you stop, leaning on his shoulder for support, unbuckling your heels and sighing with relief before stepping in the elevator. “I don’t know how you ladies do it with the heels.” He laughs.

“Worst. Nightmare.” You groan, tossing the heels into a nearby trash can. He raises his eyebrows and smirks, you catch his look and laugh. “$3 at savers. I have other shoes.”

“Just checking.” He giggles, letting you on the elevator first. You press the button to the 14th floor and he lets out a laugh.

“Your hotel is on the 14th floor? What do you know, so is mine.”

You give him a mock shock face. “Must’ve been fate!” Yeah, you were drunk.

“Oh shush.” He laughs, shaking his head. You had moved yourself closer to him by accident, you were beginning to sway, but he didn’t seem to mind when your hand lightly touches his and he places his hand gently on your lower back as the elevator doors open. You fumble with your purse, trying to find the keycard, weeble wobbling your way towards your room. You see the number for 1457 and hover at the door.

“Well, this just got even more interesting.” You look up at him curiously and he point to the room across the hall. “That’s my room.”

“No it’s not.” You say, genuinely shocked this time. He gives you a smile, taking his keycard out of his pocket, going up to the door and sliding it in the slot. It lights up green and he opens the door like he just did a magic trick.

“I think you’re stalking me.” You say, finally finding the keycard and sliding it in the door. You push open the door, turning on the lights and tossing your purse on floor. He follows you in, shutting the door and locking it behind you.

“I believe, darling. That you’re the one stalking me.” He grins, his body very close to yours you could feel the heat radiating off of him. His hand reaches up to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear and you shudder.

“Scravel. Trabble. Oh my god. TRAVEL SCRABBLE.” You cackle and quickly move away from him, you didn’t know why, he was definitely about to kiss you. You could feel his eyes on you as you dig through your luggage to find the game, you look up at him and suddenly feel shy. “What?”

“Nothing.” He smiles, leaning against the wall. “You’re just adorable to look at.”

Heat rises to your cheeks, and you bite your lower lip, going back to searching for the game. He takes the bottle of red wine on the table and pours it into two plastic cups. You laugh when he hands it to you after finding the game.

“Classy.” You grin and clink your cup against his. You both sip the wine and you jump onto the bed, opening scrabble and sitting criss cross apple sauce. He sits across from you, placing the cup on the nightstand next to the phone.

You hand him his letters and the two of you sit silently as you move around the tiles.

Que.

Quest.

Tech.

He makes a word that is just jumbled letters.

“That’s not a word.” You tell him.

“It so is a word!” He laughs.

“LEK is not a word!”

“Google it.” He smirks coyly at you.

You narrow your eyes at him and open your phone, you let out a laugh. “LEK is a basic monetary unit of Albania?! There’s no way you knew that!”

“Are you upset with me for knowing unknown words?” He leans towards you, smiling. “I mean, I can order us the pizza.”

Your breath hitches, he’s so close to you, your knees are almost touching. Your eyes dart from his lips to his eyes, your heart was racing. In one swift arm motion, you launch scrabble off the bed, taking him by his shoulders and wrapping your legs around his middle.

“Fuck the pizza.” You say, before crashing your lips against his. His arms are strong as they wrap around your waist and you straddle him. His hand moves up your leg, to your thigh, gripping the muscle as he moves his way on top of you, his tongue sliding delicately in your mouth. You grip his hair in your fist, he moans softly against your mouth, your hands pull his dress shirt out of his pants and glide up his smooth back. He pulls away from your lips, kissing your neck softly, in between your covered breasts. Your eyes flutter close when you feel him slide down towards your waist and he scoots back on his stomach, massaging your calves. You lean up on your elbows, and watch as he moves the slit of your dress to the side. He leans forward but you stop him with the base of your foot against his forehead and he laughs.

“I don’t normally do something like this.” You tell him, swallowing hard.

He gently moves your foot away, resting it on his shoulder. “I don’t either.” He gently kisses your calf. “We don’t have to…”

“No, no…I want to.” You smile shyly. “I just don’t want you to think I’m the kind of woman that will…”

He moves back up to you, your leg going with him, draping over his shoulder. He cups your face, runs his thumb along your lips. “I don’t think you’re that kind of woman.”

You smile, lifting your face up to kiss him gently. He smiles into your kiss, sliding his way back down in between your legs. Your heart races, feeling him pulling you towards him by your thighs, your knees bend and your head falls back against the pillow as he leaves soft kisses on your inner thighs. You feel his fingers dance gently along the straps of your underwear and you lifts your hips as he pulls them off slowly. He looks up at you through his eyelashes and grins. He looked so sexy. You could honestly come by just his look alone.

“You are very, very beautiful.” He says softly, and his face disappears. You gasp softly when you feel his lips kiss close to your sex, and your back immediately arches when his lips wrap around your clit and he sucks. You grip the blanket beneath you, a moan escaping your lungs.

“Ohhh…” You moan loudly, your hands fists his hair as he swirls his tongue in circles, licking you delicately and kneading at your thighs. You could already feel your orgasm building, but this was just…too fucking good. You didn’t want it to stop. You bite your bottom lip, your tummy muscles clench as your orgasm screams out of you and your back arches. He continues to eat you up, burying his face deeper as you continue to come.

He lifts his face, wiping his lips and smiles, you catch your breath, leaning up to catch his lips. You tasted yourself, and that made you crave him more. He holds your face with his soft hands and you move on top of him, ripping the buttons of his shirt open. He groans softly as you pull away from his lips and kiss his chest, moving your tongue in long stripes across his torso and move your lips down to his hips. You unzip his pants, kissing him gently on the sensitive skin on his pelvis and he shivers, letting out a soft gasp. Your eyes widen as you expose him, questioning whether or not you could fit this in your mouth. You kiss the tip gently and he moans, letting out a laugh of pleasure as you take him entirely into your mouth. He pulls gently at your hair as you swirl your tongue around the head, moving your fist up and down. His head hangs over the bed as he breathes heavily, you watch his chest rise and fall.

He gasps. “I want…I want to feel you.” You lift up your head and he sits up, taking your face, kissing your swollen lips. You shiver, more butterflies settling in your tummy and he watches as you lift your dress above your head. You instinctively shield yourself and he stands up, smiling at you, taking off the rest of his clothes. His hands gently go to your arms and he rubs his palms against your soft skin. You blush as he pulls your arms away from your chest, his eyes scan your body and he meets your gaze. He gives you another sweet smile, leaning forward to kiss you gently, you wrap your arms around his shoulders to deepen the kiss and he kneads at your waist. He cups your ass, lifting you up to the picture wjndow ledge and he stands between your legs. You pull away from his mouth, smiling shyly.

“Condom?” You ask him. He smiles, nodding and going into his jacket pocket. You laugh almost.

“What?” He chuckles as he places the rubber over his erection. “I’m a gentleman. I’m never gonna assume.”

Your heart does a pitter patter, you swear you could see yourself falling in love with this man. He cups your cheek, kissing you deeply and you open your legs wider for him. He hooks your leg around his waist and stares into your eyes. He slowly slides into you and you gasp, your head falling back against the window with a thud. He lets out a sharp breath, gripping your thighs as he pushes himself deeper. He kisses your neck, thrusting into you faster and his lips catch your hardened nipple in his mouth.

“Mmmm…ohhhh…fuuuck…” You’re surprised at your own sounds, how insanely pornographic they sound and you moan even louder when he grunts loudly.

You pull his face towards yours, biting his lower lip and he holds onto the window for support, rocking his hips faster and faster. You whimper and he picks you up, still inside you and kissing you passionately as you both collapse on the bed. You place your leg on his shoulder and he kisses your calf, holding your leg to him as he moves, his other hand reaching to cup your breasts. You place your own hands through your hair, grazing up your body, the pleasure you were getting from him was making you see colors. His moves become a little ragged, and you can tell he’s getting close.

“Kiss me.” You moan, another orgasm building fast. He does as he is told, slipping his tongue in your mouth, thrusting harder and deeper. Your nails claw at his back, and he grunts loudly as you clench around his cock, screaming so loud you’re positive the whole building heard you. He comes hard seconds after you, his moans full of raw, raspy intensity. You hold him close to you, caressing his damp hair as you catch your breath. He lifts his face up to look at you and kisses you softly. You smile against his lips and he gently pulls out of you. He sighs, resting his head on your chest.

“I don’t mean to put a damper on this wonderful night…but I really have to pee.” You laugh and he chuckles against your chest, moving off of you. You hop off the bed, grabbing a pair of shorts and a t shirt from your luggage and rush into the bathroom, after doing your business you tidy yourself up and brush your teeth. When you exit the bathroom, Joseph is sitting with his ankles crossed in a t-shirt and sweatpants. You had forgotten his room was across the hall.

He smiles sweetly at you and you smile back, crawling next to him in the bed. He cradles you against his chest, gently running his fingers through your hair.

“Question game?” He says with a laugh and you nod.

“Okay, where did you grow up?”

You suddenly felt a pit in your stomach. Talking about home opened wounds that were still healing, but you answer him anyway. “Massachusetts.”

“With parents and siblings?” His finger dances gently around your shoulder.

“No siblings, just my parents.” You sigh. “Only child.”

“Me too.” He chuckles. “Where are your parents now?”

Fuck. Here comes the most awkward interaction in the world. He feels you tense up but doesn’t say anything. “…you don’t have to answer that, love. I’m sorry if it’s a touchy subject.”

“No.” You laugh awkwardly. “It’s not, it’s just…what I’m about to tell you usually makes people feel uncomfortable and word vomit which makes me want to crawl into a hole, but I don’t think you’re that kind of person.”

You feel his eyes on you and you glance up at him, he was really listening to you. “My dad lives in a one bedroom apartment with his dog Felix in Boston. And…my mom…she died when I was seventeen.” His hold on you tightens and he gently caresses your face, moving his face closer to yours to stare into your eyes.

“Tell me about her.” He says softly and tears immediately spring to your eyes. You have never had someone say that to you, not even your loved ones, let alone a stranger.

So, you tell him. You tell him how she was the funniest woman on planet earth. How she could quote some memorable movies using their voices and would go out of her way to make a person laugh. How much she loved you. How angry you were when she died. How you hope to never scream like that again in your life. How sometimes you wish you could go back, and take her place.

You feel his lips on your cheeks, kissing your tears away, you didn’t even realize you had been crying.

“Oh my god, I’m sorry, this is embarrassing.” You laugh, wiping your face.

“Don’t ever apologize for talking about an important person like her. She sounds like a lovely woman.” He rubs your cheeks. “She made one hell of a daughter.”

You laugh softly, pressing your forehead against his. “How is it possible I meet a perfect stranger at a casino and I still have no idea who you are?”

He laughs and sighs. “Well…do you know Metallica?” He almost blushes and you stare into his eyes, confusion on your face.

Then you realize.

Holy.

Fucking.

Shit.

Holy. Shit.

You gasp loudly, launching yourself back from him, your body falling off the bed as he tries to grab you and you land on your back. You let out a laugh.

“Are you telling me…no, no, no, hold on. Hold on.” You meet his eyes and he’s stifling a laugh but also looks horrified. “Joseph…Joseph…Quinn? Who played Eddie Munson? Are you…me? Me?!”

You lean up on the edge of the bed, staring straight into his eyes, he looks like a lost puppy and your heart skips a beat. “If you want me to leave, I will leave. I know it’s a lot; I do, but…I felt something as soon as I looked into your eyes. I can’t explain it…but I understand if you don’t want me here.”

You stare at him, leaning closer to him, your hands grab his face. You gently run your hands over his cheeks, his lips, studying him more. “No…I want you to stay.”

He lets out a sigh. “Really?”

You smile largely. “Right now, you’re just the handsome man who bought me a drink at a bar, who made me laugh and listened to me talk about the worst day of my life. You left no hints, you were just you. Just for tonight, and forever, that’s who you are to me. Just Joseph.”

He smiles, grabbing your hand, his cheeks dimpling, and you kiss him.

Boy, do you kiss him.

Fin.

[lost-inthe-v0id]

Young Snape x Reader prompt/idea? Idk

I can’t really write so this is a scenario I made up that I just word vomited

I’ve always had a crush on snapes young actor since I was like 8 so this is js something I made up when I would daydream

Student!Reader is a ravenclaw pure blood with no strong opinions on wizards/witches with no magic parents and a lot of ravenclaw and slytherin friends

Student!Reader and Student!Snape meet on the train and click right away but don’t hang out at school as much because Lily told Snape she didn’t like reader. They’re still acquaintances until that changes due to Lily getting closer to James and Severus getting a class with Reader. Little by little they slowly start getting closer together.

Reader would like to spend more time with him but he feels a responsibility to stay with Lily all the time since she was the only one who cared to stick around with him. Reader doesn’t like the way Lily treats him and the fact she’s all buddy buddy with his bullies

Finally it’s all solidified when Severus and Lily have an argument their 4th or 5th and he calls her a mudblood. Lily starts to ignore Severus not only everytime he goes to apologize but anytime he comes near her at all. She starts to stand by and just watch James and his gang bully Snape and sometimes laughs.

Reader finds Severus crying and comforts him. Gives him a pep talk about how wonderful he is and how people make mistakes and no one deserves to be treated like he is. Finally after that they start hanging out everyday. Severus becomes good friends with Readers friends but they still usually only hang out with each other.

Reader tells people in Ravenclaw and slytherine how Lily treated Severus and people stopped talking to her, gossiping about her even. Since Reader is a pure blood that’s part of an affluent family she grew up around other affluent family kids. Overall reader was not only friends with higher influence kids but also very respected among them due to her kind and understanding nature. So a lot of these people started to look down on Lily.

Finally it all comes together when Snape and Reader are near a tree talking one day when he starts telling Reader how much he doesn’t deserve her and kind of confessing and rambling when Reader kisses him. After that they start dating, the don’t try to hide it either. They hold hands ALL the time, sometimes you find the pair snogging, other times you find Reader laying her head on his shoulder.

Lily doesn’t like this, she liked the fact Severus liked her and the attention she would get from him on top of that people she use to talk to won’t even look at her now. She tries to talk to him saying she’s ready to hear him out but by then Severus couldn’t really give a shit.

Idrk about the rest

I know not a lot of people like Snape like that so I’m just posting this for myself not really expecting anyone to see this lol

If someone does end up making a full fledged fic plz credit me :<

[taevincii]

Hi! As a Herbo girlie I thank you for your service (=freezing your butt off yesterday). Can you/were you planning to give a bit of info how the team dynamics were from what you saw and how you found J in person? If not, no worries, I’m just nosy :-)

Hi hi!

Omg babes, it was SO cold and wet but totally worth it! I’d do it ten times over 🫡

The team dynamic/vibes on the sideline were great! That’s one thing I definitely noticed - winning obvi helps with that but the team was definitely in good spirits. Towards the beginning of the game, everyone was more focused and locked in but as things progressed, the players started to joke around and interact with the fans more. At one point, Derwin came running over to our section after a big defensive play, Bozeman was also waving and smiling to the crowd, Daiyan was playing some version of air ‘rock paper scissors’ with some fans too lol

ALSO having JK back was everything! You could tell he was so excited to be out there again. He was very animated on the sideline and it was so great to see!!

I think the cutest moment was when Justin noticed some young fans in the crowd mid-game and he waved at them and said “after”. And obviously, the Chargers posted him running to those same young fans after the game and signing some things for them. It was really sweet of him to keep his promise and really cool to see that unfold in real time.

As for Justin, he was really involved on the sideline. After every offensive drive, regardless if they scored or not, he would walk down the sideline and give everyone high-fives or a little pep talk. He was also smiling and seemingly cracking jokes with a lot of different guys throughout the game as well.

There were points where I found myself watching Justin more than the game 😬 but likeeeee can you blame me? It was also really cool to see both sides of Justin, Football Justin would come out when it was his time to take the field or go over a play with Coach Day but baby boy/‘football is fun’ Justin would come out when he was chilling on the sidelines (with his beanie 🥹)

I think that covers everything but lemme know if there is anything specific you wanted to know!!!

[badomensgoodomens]

RIFFS AND REGRETS - noah sebastian - part two

part one here

______________________________________

hi, i have ultimately decided that after a week i absolutely hate this storyline and believe i can do better lol. i had intended to progress further after this chapter, but it is suitable to stop here.

_______________________________________

Hadn’t planned on waking up in a shitty emergency tent during the festival of a lifetime, much less the angry danielle who was standing over me lecturing me. 

“Are you fucking stupid?? You were so dehydrated that the adrenaline made you faint!! We talked about this- that is the number one rule of touring-” “danielle-” “you had me worried sick!! That is so not cool-” “danielle!!” i shout, overwhelmed. “Fuck- did i hit my head on the way down?” i ask, rubbing my face.

 “Uhhuh, leo said you went down like a ton of bricks, hit your ribs on the fuckin toilet bowl.” i groan, leaning my head back. “He was watching you, yaknow.” she says. I pause, looking up at her in utter confusion. “Who?” “noah. From the artist tent.” i close my eyes with a sigh at that information. “Thanks for sharing.” i mumble, trying to ignore the stinging coming from my ribs. 

“You can't keep ignoring him, you know.” she says, shifting her weight from one foot to another, hand resting on her pregnant belly. “He broke my fuckin heart dani.” i reply, too exhausted to put up a proper fight. “Oh please. You didn’t even date.” she says, vic comes up behind her. “Who?” he says, wrapping his arms around danielles stomach. “He who shall not be named.” dani retorts, leaning her head on his shoulder. “She STILL stalks my insta. I am NOT talking to him. Hes probably cheating with poppy anyways. Shes pretty.” i say, sitting up a bit. “Arabella, you're one stupid bitch.” 

____________________

The next morning i have a much needed shower, i stand infront of the foggy bathroom mirror in nothing but a plain black set, admiring the nasty ass bruise that littered my left rib. Yikes. I shimmy into a stage outfit, now ruined by the bruise i adorned. 

I managed to limp backstage with the help of vic, who set me down on a random, rundown couch with a bottle of water. I lean back with closed eyes, until the weight shifts that is. I crack an eye open, nicholas sits next to me. “So i’m just ticking you all off one by one huh?” i murmur, closing my eyes. “You could say that i guess. Hey i heard through the grapevine about what happened yesterday. You okay?” i take a sip of water, allowing the cold liquid to soothe my throat before speaking again. “This water is good.” “you didn’t answer my question.” he uncrosses his arms, leaning back a little. “I don’t want to lie to you” i shoot back. He grins. “Ive missed you, bella.” he side hugs me, narrowly missing my bruise. I just hum in response. “Hows the rockstar life?” i ask, he tilts his head. “Its okay i guess. I really do miss having you around bella-” he starts again. “Hey, we’re on in five.” noah calls out, briefly walking past the room, he avoids eye contact. 

Its almost like im a thorn in his side. 

I probably am, honestly. 

______________________________

I can’t even lie, bad omens stage presence is phenomenal. Its exhilarating and exhausting all at the same time. They give every concert their all, its admirable. However, unfortunately we were allocated the time slot AFTER them. I hobble towards side stage, taking deep breaths. Leo gives me one of his bullshit pep talks. “I’m not even anxious, just unsure how im supposed to do this.” i laugh, pulling myself up the stairs. 

“Hey australia how we feeling!!!??” I call out, genuinely trying  to muster up ANY ounce of energy. “So yesterday i took quite the fall, and now im covered in bruises, so i need YOU guys to give it your all!!” 

We launch right into our set, the crowd menacing once again. During each set i allocated 5 minutes at the end to play whatever song i please. 

“So i intended to perform doomed today, because i know yall love oli sykes. But considering im uhhh a bit.. Limited. We are gonna sing a bit of sleep token.” 

Gene begins to play the opening chords to “the love you want” 

Everyone and their mother knew how much i loved sleeptoken, how much noah did. However i was dumbfounded when i spotted him standing side stage, his gaze boring into the bruises on my left side. Fuck. this just got an awful lot more awkward. I finish off on stage, managing to slip past him in a timely manner despite being injured. I collapse on to a leather couch, exhausted. 

I lay there for a while, watching the different bands filter past. Eventually, i hobble my ass out of there, humming mindlessly. 

“Give by sleeptoken huh?” 

I actually nearly shit myself, my heart falling to my ass. 

“Can i help you?” i respond, turning around to face noah. I can’t pinpoint what flashes across his face. “Its been a while arabella.” he shifts awkwardly. I nod, we stand awkwardly, the wind picks up. “We should really talk.” he breaks the silence, taking a step forward. 

I step backwards, muttering “ill think about it.” before escaping to my bus. I shut and lock the bus door, sliding down it. Shit. Shit. I just fucking ran away from him. 

“You good?” leo asks, handing me a beer. “Just ran into noah.” i breathe out, taking a sip. He joins me on the floor. “How’d that go? You wanna talk about it?” i sigh. Gene and lucy join us. “What even happened between you two” lucy questions, cradling a vodka cruiser. 

“He started dating this girl and got really distant. She told him to drop me, eventually i got so sick of it i tried to walk out and we got into an argument. He said… some stuff, so i got the hell out of there.” i summarise, avoiding eye contact. Leo elbows me, “you wanna say the rest?” 

I cringe, the whole situation not having been my best moment. 

“Okaywellyeahihadacrushonhim butineveractedonitsoidontknowwhyshewassomad-”             

Leo laughs. 

“Im fuckin doomed for eternity, he wants to talk” 

____________________________

“I think you should.” danielle says, crowded around a bar table in a bustling underground joint. I shake my head. “Do i even bother though? How do i know hes not going to just reprimand me for what happened?” i groan, my head in my hands. Vic hands me a much needed drink. I sigh, unsure of what to really do with myself. 

A couple drinks in, vic whisks dani away to the dancefloor, leaving me alone. I toy with the straw of my drink, running my fingers over the rim. Somebody sits opposite me. I look up, meeting the eyes of folio. “You okay?” he asks, signature grin slapped across his face. “I’m good, you?” i answer, trying to make smalltalk. He replies with a nod, downing the rest of his drink. “Shouldn’t you be with the boys?” my voice is quiet, small. “Nicholas and noah are god knows where. Jollys chatting up some girl. Didn’t wanna kill his vibe. Plus you looked sad so….” 

Right. He was only here because he pitied me. Just like the rest of them. “”Nick, it was great talking to you but i think im gonna head back to the buses.” I say, packing my things up. “Oh- okay. Get there safely.” he smiles, pulling me into a hug. I step out, exhausted. I slip towards the side alley, reaching for a cigarette in my bra. I lean my head back on the cold brick wall, the night air was cold compared to the short dress i was wearing. I was honestly a mess… this was all so…. Confronting. 

I wait patiently for my uber, wanting to get the hell out of here. “You got a lighter?” i gulp, turning around. Im face to face with his chest. Fuck i forgot hes a fucking giant. I look up at him, nodding. I watch him light a joint, leaning on the wall next to me. “You wanna talk.. Or..?” 

I take a deep breath. Contemplating every single life choice.

“Are you and her still together?” i ask, rubbing my hands on my thighs anxiously. He shakes his head, taking a drag. “I broke up with natasha four years ago.” i hum, so they stayed together a whole year after i left. I look up at the night sky, unsure of what to say next. 

“Im sorry for what i said to you.” 

Im almost immediately agitated. “You hurt me noah.” he rubs his face, handing me the joint. “You don’t think i don’t know that?! I watched you walk out that door knowing there was nothing i could do-” “there was SO much you could fucking do.” 

Its silent for a moment. 

“She threatened me that day.”

“What?” 

“Natasha. She slashed my tires.” 

Hes honestly.. Taken aback. 

“Sorry?” 

“She told me you’d never love me. That i was pitiful for thinking i had a chance.” i swallow, avoiding eye contact. 

“Bella-”

I take a drag. “I’m sorry noah.” 

“What for..?” he says, almost holding his breath. 

“I told you that i hoped you’d feel sick to your stomach when you hear my name.” i laugh bitterly. 

He nods. 

“Uhh… not exactly far from the truth.” 

We sit in comfortable silence, just smoking. 

“I broke up with her because she cheated on me. Shes a tattoo artist now, atleast thats what ive heard from nosey interviewers.” he says, effectively breaking the silence. 

I don’t say anything, staring at the ground. It starts to rain. 

“We weren’t supposed to end like this.” he speaks again.

“Atleast not in my dreams.” i laugh. 

“Chase two girls, lose the one.” noah says, looking down the alleyway. 

I look at him quizzically. 

“Wait. you liked me?” 

“Like.”

fuck this. I need to go, i need to get away from him. Fuck. fuck im going to fuck something up. I shouldn’t of done this. 

My heels click as i begin to run away again, wiping frantic tears. He reaches for my wrist, his fingers warm compared to the coldness of the night. pulling me back to him like a safety net. Almost immediately i wrap my arms around his waist, sobbing. 

“I don’t hate you” i wail, he sighs, stroking my hair. 

I shouldn’t be doing this. 

“I know bella.” he murmurs, tightening his grip on my waist. 

“I should.” i sniffle, looking up at his doe brown eyes. 

“You should. And it makes me the luckiest bastard in the world that you can’t manage to.”