#give me the benefit of the doubt
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#🪩#im tired of people treating me like i dont already know i have to improve before my work is perfect#im tired of ppl acting like im just sailing through life without constantly thinking about how to get better#im sick of people pointing out flaws in my work as if i cant see them#i dont care if they’re saying it bc they care#i dont care if they’re just trying to help me get better#you can fucking do that without implying that i dont see where i have room for improvement#im fucking over it#you arent my mentor‚ this is not your job#i appreciate that you want to see me thrive‚ but it just feels like kicking a horse when its down#plus its like ppl keep forgetting that i have over a decade of art education under my belt#stop treating me like a god damn child#i’m not stupid#im not naïve#give me the benefit of the doubt
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Just a heads up to new artists who might not know this: tracing people's artwork and posting it as your own is not okay. With or without credit, its stolen if you don't have permission.
This is why I continue to stay out of the Octonauts fandom and now probably will not return. Even months after leaving the fandom I'm still getting new art tracers and thieves.
If you absolutely have to trace and post it, just ask the artist first. If they say no then don't trace their artwork.
#sorry if this post seems pretty salty#I had a really long day and I think I'm coming down with something#was going to unwind and check tumblr real fast before crashing#only to stumble upon yet another art tracer. And who would have thought. it was Octonauts#This might be the nail in the coffin for me#I don't have any confidence when it comes to returning to this fandom-#but I tried to give them the benefit of the doubt and maybe they really don't know that it's not okay to do that#So that's what this hastily made and very drowsy post is for-#for new artists that might know that tracing people's artwork and posting it as if it was your own is theft#And it also keeps artists like me out of fandoms.#So apologies#this is a slightly salty yet gentle reminder to not trace peoples art without permission#thank you for reading 💞#heres to hoping i don't wake up with a terrible cold tomorrow 💀
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If I learned anything in my master's degree, it was actually about differentiating mis and disinfo, because misinformation and disinformation are not synonyms.
Misinformation:
Incorrect or misleading information. Basically, being wrong or repeating something factually incorrect.
Disinformation:
Incorrect, misleading information designed to be deceptive and propagate wrong information to obfuscate the truth. Becomes misinformation when it's been shared and repeated repeatedly, but not when someone posts the initial incorrect, misleading information.
If you see someone posting disinformation, call it what it is. When I was studying propaganda and disinformation, we had to take breaks every fifteen minutes and check in with someone not immersed in it because even with training you are not immune to propaganda.
Calling a spade a spade is a very important skill.
#misinfo#disinfo#propaganda#op is a zionist. like I'm actually a real Zionist#not just a Jew you dislike I'm actually one of them#ergo if you have a problem with Zionists you do actually have a problem with me and you are in fact the person this post is about#well#it's about people being too nice and giving you the benefit of the doubt and assuming everything is misinfo when disinfo exists#vent post
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i think probably the reason i like the idea of like a girl secretly being a dragon but still trying to just have a life in society and be normal is because it's kinda a transfem narrative of the whole like everyone thinks you're a terrifying monster but you just want to be a girl. and the other reason is due to i'm otherkin
#worded poorly i'm too tired to write it out good#i know that this will be very hard for most people on this site but i would like you to please give me the benefit of the doubt when readin#and not focus on all of the minute details with my wording to pick it apart like you're dissecting a frog#though maybe i am also just scared to post it because i am social anxiety girl so i'm getting defensive before anyone even takes issue#i don't know. fuck just don't worry too much about the post or these tags or anything#just read it in good faith okie? smiles so sweetly
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I feel like one thing I need to work on is my anxiety about being interpreted wrong. I have so many posts in my drafts on this blog and my other ones that I think are good messages, but the fear of being interpreted wrong and getting hate is a lot.
Sometimes I’m scared I am saying the wrong thing.
And maybe sometimes I am. But I need to learn it doesn’t make me a failure or a bad person.
And sometimes… people are just determined to misinterpret you. And no amount of careful wording or explaining will change that.
#also#I think so many people following me#have done so for awhile#and know that even if I did say the wrong thing#I’d never have bad intentions#and give me the benefit of the doubt#and allow me to apologize and correct my wrongs#personal
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Happy Werewolf Wednesday, ya'll! We're serving up a big pot of tea tonight so get those cups ready!
Special thanks to Blackbackedjackal and King for their help in putting this together, editing, and especially to Jackal for being so supportive and encouraging. I'm very much not normally the type to do call-out posts, but people need to be aware of Dogblud, as she has hurt, not only myself, but quite a few others as well, and seems to have somehow gotten away with behaving like this for 20-odd years. I'm of the mind she shouldn't be allowed to do so any more, hence this post.
TL;DR - Beware of Dogblud, aka Ashryn, aka DogofBlud, aka ThatDogMagic. Very, very long post under the cut.
With everything happening with DogBlud and Blackbackedjackal's studio, I felt emboldened to come forward with my own experiences with her. This is something I've been carrying around since it happened roughly 2 years ago. It was one of the main reasons that put me off drawing werewolves, my own characters, or engaging any more in the fandom. I've hinted at it a few times but I've never had the energy to come forward and deal with the fall out. I wanted to move on with the rest of my life because IRL was more important than online drama. And I knew her behavior would come back to bite her sooner or later, regardless of what I did.
It's been very validating to see that I was right.
It was around the time that Blud and I became friends that I was feeling a bit burnt out on werewolves. I'd been trying to pull together my own werewolf-related project for something close to 12 years. The past 4 years had also been pretty draining on me creatively and socially, as it had for a lot of artists with regards to the pandemic. I also had some IRL things I was dealing with: mainly with my marriage and transitioning between medications to manage my anxiety + bipolar.
Unfortunately, I didn't have the foresight to screenshot everything at the time. I do have logs from back when we roleplayed together. There are several conversations in them but because they were saved as text documents, they're pretty dubious in terms of solid evidence.
It would have been better if I had taken screenshots as it was happening, rather than just saving the logs. With what I *do* have, however, I feel as though it may be enough to make the point that I'm trying to make, and to exhibit how horrible things got.
I'll provide some context.
I had talked with Blud on and off over the years, and we had always gotten along. We had a lot in common and after we had started talking more, our friendship eventually grew into a collaborative project. We were going to combine our stories and write a comic based on it. We had a lot of discussions on how Blud was reticent to do this in the beginning and how she wanted a contract to be made up so that in the event that something *did* happen, we could both walk away feeling like it was handled fairly.
Honestly, I should have listened to the first alarm that went off in my brain, when, in an act of ominous foreboding she said something along the lines of don't be so sure, it could happen. It was in response to me being like "we're getting along so well and share so much of a bond right now. I can't fathom that being a problem!"
The contract never materialized. It was something we had decided to do *after* we had put together something of a prototype project to see how well we worked together. It made complete sense to me at the time as we were both eager to focus on the fun parts of writing and drawing together.
It was decided that I would be the lead artist (doing coloring and final lines) while Blud would do everything else (which was inking, layouts, and the majority of the writing). The both of us felt that she had more experience in those areas. I also believed that she had a better knack for it as well. I had felt that she had a better understanding of story structure than myself. And I thought that Blud had felt the same way about my art. That I had the experience to take point on that.
Since I had collaborated with other artists and writers before, I attempted to approach the project with the same sort of professionalism I always do. Especially the projects that I genuinely thought stood a chance of being published in the future. We had started out trying to get a feel for each other's flows and rhythms. I had expected Blud to try and meet me in the middle of where our processes would potentially differ from one another, so that we could develop a fairly smooth workflow.
I had also expected, according to our discussions on the matter, that we would value each other's opinions on things and take them into consideration. We had such good synchronicity already.
In the beginning, there wasn't any unusual behavior that caught my attention. Blud was a bit uncomfortable with trying out new things but I did my best to accommodate her so that our project could move forward without too much turbulence. She had also mentioned to me before that she was autistic, and since my husband is also autistic, I knew how difficult it could be when it came to adapting to new routines. But when it was time for her to deliver the first set of layouts, it wasn't at all what I expected.
What I had expected was something with margins, clearly marked boxes, and figures that I could do rough lines over. I also expected notes that confirmed what we had discussed earlier about the project; that way I knew what she wanted or if there would be any changes. She took offense to this, feeling like I was violating our agreement. Though Blud did try to give me space with regards to the actual art, and while she would offer criticisms here and there, I trusted her opinion as an artist and as a friend. But apparently that didn't go both ways. In fact, Blud seemed to be offended that I expected more from her.
Blud agreed to concede. She suddenly seemed fine with the changes that I had asked for after seeing the layouts. I guess she was feeling overstimulated by the change and I might have been applying too much of a critical tone to her responses to begin with. I have had to deal with rejection sensitivity throughout my life and it's certainly prompted me to approach what people say to me online with a bit of scrutiny (sometimes too much).
And while I was mildly annoyed, although admittedly I was more concerned with Blud's overall reaction to my asking for clarification about several things in the layouts, I let it go. But it seemed like there was a problem. The majority of my ideas were either rejected or outright overridden with Blud convincing me that my faulty memory had made me unable to remember what we had agreed upon. Or that I might have been misremembering in my own favor.
There was one time where we were discussing a monster's design. Blud had already decided to settle on one design that she had come up with, even as I continued to offer other suggestions. The story was to take place in my setting, so I was under the impression that I got to decide what kind of creatures should populate it. The conversation ended somewhat ambiguously. I had assumed that we'd come to a solid conclusion later.
I came back the next day and it turned out that we were using her design because that was what we had decided on. "Don't you remember? You really need to do something about that faulty memory of yours, Tek. I can't be doing this for you all the time."
At which point, Blud would go back and meticulously scour the conversation until she managed to find a set of lines that would make it seem as though I had 100% agreed. Even when I tried to explain that I had meant something else, she took it as an affront on her inability to understand nuances due to her autism.
I admit that my memory isn't that greatest at times, but I've never had anyone complain about it before. And none of my friends have ever minded providing reminders to me if I did misremember something incorrectly. We all forget stuff at times, right? It's *still* something that I'm self-conscious about because (like a lot of people with ADHD) my memory seems selective at times. This was, apparently, a problem that I needed to manage.
And even as I'm remembering these incidents to the best of my ability, I've already spent so much time recounting all of this to friends. I feel confident in my recollection. There are some details that may overlap or become entwined with other things, but it all basically tells the same story. Especially in conjunction with what's been said by others. You're free to take it as hearsay since I do not have screenshots to back this up.
I will mention (since I've been told it's something that Blud has taken particular interest in) that at one point, I did have a crush on her. I was having some problems IRL, and it was nice to have someone whom I felt actually understood me. I also felt like I saw a lot of myself in her. I think that, at one point, I did describe her as the kind of "girlfriend" I would want. Blud seemed to indicate the feeling was mutual.
Between our collaborative partnership and all of the details we shared about our lives, it did feel like an intimate relationship at times. I had no intentions of pursuing it. We were not compatible in our romantic and sexual identities, and I had no intention of leaving my current partner for her.
I had begun to notice red flags, even if I wasn't ready to accept them yet.
I've had experience with abusive relationships in the past but they were in person, and not online. I knew what to look out for and yet I was being willfully ignorant about our friendship. I wanted to give Blud the benefit of the doubt. I wanted the project to work *so* badly that I was willing to work with her increasing demands as the months went by.
I had no idea that those demands would change into, quite literal, temper tantrums. It would then trigger my fawning response which was due to an abusive family situation that I had dealt with before I moved to Canada. The tactic was this: concede to someone until there was a time that they either understood reason or I had the chance to use it against them if necessary.
I started to take screenshots. I wish that I had taken a lot more of them so that everyone could get a better idea of what was happening. I did go back and manage to record the majority of the first outburst. It was the first inkling I had that Blud wasn't playing with a full deck of cards. I knew that that would be one of the first conversations that she would promptly delete. And consequently, I was right.
This assortment of screenshots will exhibit the first serious confrontation that Blud had with me. I am absolutely *not* proud of how I handled this. I was literally panicking at the time and doing whatever I could to get her to calm down. Because I have a temper that can look similar to this in person, I knew that I had to wait until the post-tantrum clarity would hit Blud. I tried my best to not lose my own temper in turn but looking back, I feel that I came off as sounding too timid.
I didn't want to ruin this project.
I wanted to make a comic with an individual that I admired and respected as a fellow artist. And, with me not knowing how to respond, my main priority was to not make things any worse than they already were.
Below is the conversation in its entirety:
I had taken this screenshot on my phone after I had stepped away to compose myself. Blud had handled the confrontation and criticism with a reasonable amount of apprehension. But what had not occurred to me was that I could have said something that would remind her of past experiences with a roleplaying group.
It was something that had evidently scarred Blud for life.
I took away the wrong things from what she had told me, choosing to focus on the aspects of the "betrayal" that had appeared to bother her the most. And in hindsight, I did not see the correlation. I was genuinely apologetic that I had hurt her feelings.
But I *will* critique Blud for her poor handling of the situation. Whether or not I had hurt her feelings, no one is entitled to act like this or claim that this is what attempting to resolve a problem should look like.
I wasn't sure on how to initially respond to Blud. It had been ages since I'd had to deal with someone flying off the handle like that.
The following screenshots are where the conversation picked up, after she had already deleted the above message:
We had weathered the "storm" and after Blud calmed down, she was ready to communicate. There was a part of me that was genuinely sincere when I apologized to her. I did mean it when I said that I had no intentions of hurting her and that I hadn't considered how my statement would sound to her.
I had hoped that this had been a stress response due to factors outside of our collaboration. And especially when I took into account how she had interacted with me in the past. I knew that Blud had a lot going on IRL, and that she had already put a considerable amount of energy into this project.
I had taken her meltdown more personally than she could perceive that I would, because this was something that was acceptable to her. She had a "condition" that would absolve her of these abhorrent meltdowns and I needed to get used to them if we were going to continue working on that project together.
I was shaking the entire time we were typing in the chat.
I was sincere in my responses. I really did want to work things out with Blud and give her the benefit of the doubt. I could have been taking the things that she said too personally or maybe I had been reading too much into the situation. Was there a chance that I could have been misreading her outburst? I tried my best to keep an open mind though I was still somewhat baffled by the fact that she would have meltdowns as often as she did.
I confided in my husband and some other friends about the situation. They were also bewildered by Blud's actions.
By this point, I was struggling with the reality that this collaboration was most likely *not* going to work out but I still wanted to try. I still cared about Blud. We would still hang out together and talk about things like music, our characters, or our stories.
While I did have the foresight to go back and screenshot this section, I wasn't fast enough to get screenshots of everything else that I will be going over. Blud *did* admit to going back and deleting certain exchanges due to a mixture of shame; not wanting to look at them when she would scroll through our conversations.
In retrospect, it was very telling.
And even after that meltdown, I still enjoyed the friendship that I had with her. I kept my guard up but I was willing to make compromises on her behalf if it resulted in better communication between the two of us. Blud made me promise to immediately tell her if I had a problem with something. I also agreed to keep notes of our conversations.
It worked for the most part.
In the end though, it became apparent that Blud wasn't willing to do the same for me (even after we had an extended conversation about it). I then realized that I had been tasked with basically *managing* her autism for her. I was already busy with my supposedly "bad memory" at the time; and Blud was more than ready to scroll back up through our conversations to cherry-pick a line or two of text to remind me of what was said earlier.
Because, for her, circumstances couldn't ever change. If they did, it would mean that Blud had lost control of the situation and that she was in the wrong. She could *not* be in the wrong.
And if she was in the wrong? It would take solid evidence, three witnesses, and a court of law to prove it.
She had two other major meltdowns after this. I managed to step away from communicating with her through one of them and I don't remember the other meltdown lasting very long. She immediately deleted the texts of both of those instances before I could take screenshots of them.
It seemed like I could do nothing right when it came to Blud, no matter the lengths I would go to accommodate her. I knew that it was a common tactic used by abusers. I finally accepted that our partnership wasn't going to work out and I began thinking about an exit strategy. The final straw was when she began to expect me to be at her beck and call.
I had promised that I would be there for her, within reason, and I was willing to offer reassurances whenever she would ask me for them. The promise had been made back when we had first started to talk to one another with more frequency, before Blud had shown me her true colors. I would end up completely underestimating just how badly she would need reassurance.
To be frank, I underestimated a lot about Blud in the beginning.
I would end up mentioning that I enjoyed my space in several different conversations with her. That there was a chance that I might be offline for several days so I could take care of things IRL and recharge my social batteries. I'm somewhat of a recluse. And an adult who enjoys things that aren't online.
She said that it was fine.
I became incredibly anxious when I would talk to Blud, especially after her somewhat abrupt change in personality.
I then attempted to put my foot down about boundaries and this is what she had to say:
I decided to walk away for a bit and I came back after I had had some time to think things over. This wasn't healthy for either of us. I wrote a couple of sentences to say goodbye to Blud before I blocked her. I knew that my actions would probably infuriate her. She had told me in the past that she *hated* not being able to have the final word... which she was able to do through email:
“And I'm not letting you pretend you have control over the situation, or the high ground. You distinctly have neither. But since you're determined to stick to your 'principles' on this, I've decided to make it easier for you.”
She thought that she was absolved of all sins just because I had said that I would stand by her at her worst. And at the time that I said that, I had no idea that her worst would be her trying everything possible to protect her boundaries while stomping all over mine. It didn't matter what she said or how often she would apologize when I would confront her. She kept doing it.
I admit that I wasn't perfect in this situation either.
There were times when I was condescending, critical, or downright mean when I talked to Blud because that was the way I had felt when she was talking to me. I soon realized that it didn't matter either way. I could have been using the friendliest tone imaginable and she still would have perceived it as either mocking or dismissive on my end. There were even a few times where I would preface my explanations with an advisory “please know that I am not attacking you and try to read this in an understanding tone,”etc. I would then post an explanation I had spent hours picking at to ensure that there was no way she could misinterpret the intent. Even so, she still read the majority of what I said as criticism and would take it to heart.
I never expected Blud to do something that made her uncomfortable; nor did I expect her to overextend herself when it came to our project. I would go out of my way to make sure everything was fine when we would talk about it. I only expected mutual respect in return.
When we would get into discussions (arguments), she would never attempt to understand my point of view or let me explain myself. It would have made it about me when it should have been about Blud and her needs. She sometimes would agree to come to a compromise about something, but only if I would admit that I was in the wrong.
I know that if Blud was to look at these screenshots, she'd be incredulous that I'm trying to distract from the horrible things that *I* did. And those horrible things that I did? I tried my best to work with her.
It wasn't just her poor teamwork that bothered me. It was her attitude and the lack of respect that she showed me. She would never ask me to clarify something that I said; always assuming that it was a criticism against her. I can only speculate that Blud did not want to hear about how any of this was her fault, like in the email she sent me.
I don't know if I was actually her friend at any point. Friends make efforts to understand one another. Ideally, they’d want their friendships to continue, and they would want everyone to be getting along and having fun. She seemed to actively defy that.
I would argue that things like this don't just happen in a vacuum. There's almost always a reason for such things, but it's honestly a mystery to me as to where this vitriol comes from. I don't know why Blud sees monsters in every word, especially if they come from a "friend".
I've seen her viscously mock herself during meltdowns; it seems like she hates herself and expects everyone else to hate her too. I think that she wants it to be the truth, so that it validates the feelings she has about herself. The behavior patterns that I'd been exposed to are consistent with the idea that Blud is seeking confirmation about the personal assumptions she has about herself. It's what makes her so volatile to those around her. Yet, she refuses to break the cycle.
I hope that she can make that choice in the future but at this point, I'm not holding my breath.
#dogblud#it feels a bit dirty doing a call out post#but people need to know#she's gotten away with this for far too long#i generally tend to give people the benefit of a doubt#clearly too much#but you can only make up so many excuses before you begin to realize that#at the end of the day#people still have the ability to make a choice#“everyone always leaves me”#well maybe you should really consider what the common variable is#just sayin
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[Stan] "...And if you find someone worth holding on to... never, ever, let them go. Follow your own path.
"Think of this letter as a promise."
[Eddie] "A promise I'm asking you to make."
[Mike] "To me."
[Ben] "To each other."
[Bev] "An oath."
[Stanley] "See, the thing about being a Loser is... you don't have anything to lose. So..."
[Young Richie] "Be true."
[Young Eddie] "Be brave."
[Young Mike] "Stand."
[Young Bev] "Believe."
[Young Bill] "And don't ever forget..."
[Young Stan] "We're Losers... and we always will be."
#it 2019#the losers club#the young losers club#i am in no way kidding when i tell you that i typed this through tears#right strap in for some TAGS#firstly i KNOW this is technically more than one line but also it's one letter so i'm giving myself the benefit of the doubt teehee#secondly here we are!#i appreciate you fellas sticking around#i didn't expect this stupid little blog to get as well-recognised as it did#having said that y'all had better stick around!!#i will be answering the asks that have already been sent to me#plus any more that come in!#(leave me anything you want - it related or not - i don't mind!)#and we'll see if i feel up to anything else in the near future (more information to come!) ;)#thank y'all sincerely from the bottom of my little gay heart#- one-line <3
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How did you deal with Chloe’s death? If I came home and found my cat already dead I would be absolutely RUINED.
I did not handle it well, anon! I can promise you that. It was as unexpected as it could be considering her age / health. I had a lot of scares with her over the years but she was actually doing pretty well at the time she died. It was also made worse by the fact that she was literally right inside the front door. We're talking one more step and I would have stepped on her.
But as awful as it is to find your cat deceased there's also some benefits. You don't have to make the decision for them. And there's no final vet visit, they get to go in the comfort of their own home and on their own time.
#ask#chloe#if you’re the person who sent me an ask in regards to this about your own experience:#I’m so sorry you had a traumatic incident. but the way you spoke to me came across very angry towards me#it is so awful that you had to find your cat dead in a traumatic way#and I want to give you the benefit of the doubt bc it can be hard to read tone over text#that being said:#my cat peacefully dying at home had nothing to do with your cat dying in such an awful way#this is about my own experience. I am in no way saying you should be glad you found your cat like that
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I'm honestly surprised that Gaiman isn't being talked about as much on here.
No, actually I'm not. He's on here isn't he? So he probably has a fan mob here as well.
I'm not on Twitter, so I have no idea what's happening there. I found out through a random video popping up on my YouTube.
I'm not surprised tbh. Wasn't he a male feminist? An oxymoron if I ever heard one. A man that truly supports women won't put a label on it, because it's called 'being a decent human being'.
This has me side eyeing other well known/popular white male authors 👀 👀👀👀👀
#neil gaiman#gaiman#neil gaiman sa#'alegations'#innocent until proven guilty but I think it should be 'suspicious of you until proven innocent#this happens way too much for me to even muster the energy to pretend to give the benefit of the doubt#and yall need to stop crying about your fandoms#alleged sa was commited!
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How the twins are doing:
The OG, White: "I will fuck my brother's nemesis to wake him up from a coma."
Sports boy, Sprite: "You will see my dick but you will not know my truth."
Actual idiot, Nont: "I will fuck you AND reveal all my secrets."
#not me the series#not me series#not me bl#twins the series#twins series#twins bl#playboyy the series#playboyy series#playboyy bl#listen nont i want to give you the benefit of the doubt my man#but you keep going up to people making out with them and then just point blank asking how you met#you're less subtle than a banana peel in mario kart
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just read an interview from the director about how we’re apparently supposed to LIKE john walker. THAT was them writing him as likeable. maybe it’s just wyatt’s acting or something but i have never been so put off by a character in my entire life. the villainy just radiates off him. unsettling costume self-righteous attitude violent outbursts literally written like every fascist extremist ever. and they want me to pity him ?? to find him likeable or fucking redeemable?? FFFFHDJNE like i have absolutely no history with that character i have no reason to dislike him other than the fact that he is so deeply unlikable. i know “likeable” is a personal opinion but mostly im concerned for the people that like him. i genuinely cannot comprehend what people saw in him in that show to make them like him. as a person, not as a character. he’s a really cool villain and everything i’m just confused that people are treating him like a victim or a straw man. he used lethal force on civilians. he wanted to use sam and bucky to legitimize his claim to the throne. he sees that shield as a symbol of patriotism to a broken nation, a military, not to people. he feeds into every negative stereotype about captain america that steve refused to bow to. he is the american imperialist that the military wants, that steve would never be because his heart is too full of altruism to have any room for ego. the foundation of captain america is the idea of being a good man. without that, captain america is just another tool for the military industrial complex.
#ted talk era VSHSNJS#if sambucky find him sus i trust their judgement#js someone so blindly obedient could never be captain america#cap is at his core a rebel#ppl giving him the benefit of the doubt is literally white privilege at work#that perversion of what cap has been in the mcu so far is what fucking scares me the most#like that is so textbook villain coded#and then they really sell it with the arrogance and the violence#anti john walker#john walker#mcu#tfatws#mine#i don’t want peace… i want problems
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suicide cw
look i have been in this area before mentally. it sucks and i wouldn’t wish this on anyone. but, and this is going to sound callous, but i don’t feel any sympathy for james somerton. even if i hope he’s like. not dead. But thats all the amount of goodwill im willing to give him. The more i think about this really, the more angry i am.
ngl this entire situation is another example of how white people weaponize their mental illness to avoid consequences. Im seeing it in real time.
this man has a continuous habit of using self-harm as a get-out-of-jail-for-free card. in both of his apologies, he has worded his supposed attempts in ways that were clearly meant to guilt people who displayed his plagiarism and overall horrendous history of racism and misogyny. i say supposed because, while i’m not saying those are lies and this would he such a fucked up thing to lie about that i don’t want to think he has, unfortunately, it’s been proven again and again that his word can’t be trusted, as he’s known to lie to try get out of consequences. Hes a proven liar. him lying about this is actually the best case scenario, because no one should go through this entire situation, wouldnt wish this on anyone, but you can only do this so often before people stop sympathizing with you. is this callous? Yeah, but like. I’m actually fucking angry he cant straight up take no as an answer. that this is how he reacts realizing he cant be one of the Cool Kidz™️ on youtube anymore. he acts like he DESERVES a career, like its not a privilege hes lost due to his own actions.
He lied about apologizing and forgiving people, he lied about giving the money to hbomberguy to give to ppl he ripped off (yknow, instead of doing it himself), he lied about the jessie gender situation and rewrote the narrative to make it so he isnt the bad guy, and hes the victim all along actually!
you can’t tell me that supposed last message of his isn’t meant to be a 13 reasons why esq attempt to deflect the blame “look i’m going to kill myself and it’s all YOUR PEOPLES FAULT for not letting me achieve my DREAM of being filmmaker IN PEACE!!! I just wanted Nick’s (the guy who I have thrown under the bus again and again) portfolio up!! Im just being a good friend dont you all FEEL BAD” he refuses to take ANY ACCOUNTABILITY of any of his actions and he IS STILL trying to shove the blame over to other people again.
it’s also pretty ironic people are like “uhhh well hbomber’s fans harassed him!!!” like hbomber outright told people NOT to HARASS JAMES!!! ALSO acting as if james doesn’t have a very real documented history of STRAIGHT UP sending his fans to harass and threaten smaller creators, more notably women, trans, and bipoc creators. especially after he’s stolen typically very personal anecdotes so he could profit from them. so why can he do it but the second people are like “hey this guys an actual piece of shit.” and he can’t handle it suddenly people are trying to white knight his shit? like no he doesn’t get that. he doesn’t get that at all just because he couldn’t handle the consequences of his actions.
what? were supposed to stay quiet about a man profiting off of other minorities because he wanted to be the spokesman for all gay people? people tried to solve this on a smaller, more private scales for YEARS and he kept doing it. it was clear that the giant public video was the ONLY way to get people to notice. HE WOULDVE GOTTEN AWAY WITH STEALING 87 FUCKING THOUSANDS WORTH OF DOLLARS. HE CANT HANDLE THE FACT HE CANT GET AWAY WITH IT.
am i supposed to feel bad for the guy who basically threatened a trans woman with the police? i don’t care what anyone says, it’s so fucking obvious that he threatened jessie by implying he was getting the police involved in their conflict. what am i supposed to act like that didn’t happen? are we supposed to pretend like he didn’t glorify nazi’s and outright said that gay people made up a good chunk of the nazis? That he didnt say america joined ww2 bc they were jealous of the NAZIS. WHAT WOULD POSSESS YOU TO FUCKING SAY THAT. but then? He gives women (not even women most of the time, he misgenders nonbinary ppl constantly) shit for writing mlm. are we supposed to act like he doesn’t straight-up sees himself superior and better than people of color and steals their works to put himself on a pedestal? Are we supposed to act like he didnt spit on our elders by saying ���only the boring gays survived aids” like man! Fuck you! He BLANTANTLY MAKES UP HISTORY TO PUT HIMSELF ON A PEDESTAL!! HE ACTIVELY TRIED TO REWRITE LGBT HISTORY TO SUIT HIS FUCKED UP NARRATIVES!
yes this sucks ! no one deserves this but no one should be making him a martyr. Thats what he fucking WANTS! He wants to be immortalized as a victim!! (again, supposedly, it was reported hes alive but its not confirmed).
The shit he got isnt near the amount of fucking callous behavior hes done again and again. Again, to drill this point, EVEN IF HE DIDNT CALL THE POLICE HE THREATENED A TRANS WOMAN INTO THINKING HE DID!!! The fact he tried to use a head injury to justify years of the outright ghoulish shit fucking astounds me. Why the fuck did anyone in his life thought it was a good idea to let him TRY to come back. in the end, he had options. he didn’t need to try to make a comeback. HE DIDNT NEED TO FUCKING LIE OR IGNORE THE SHIT HE WAS CALLED OUT ON the reality is, he wanted to come back thinking he could shove it under the rug, was told that no dude, you’re not allowed to be a youtuber anymore. you’re done. you need to move on and went full nuclear. it’s not on anyone’s hands but his own. HES BEEN DOING THIS TO HIMSELF!! But nah man we cant call his shit out bc hell may or may not kill himself. Fuck the other minorities who have the same issues but worse and sometimes BECAUSE of him. This is going to SUCKKKK so bad when other ppl, specifically white gays, are going to weaponize this shit to get away with their stuff.
#warning: do not read this post if you want me to be nice to james somerton. i am extremely mean in this post.#before anyone accuses me of shit i legit never contacted him myself or anyone involved. i am someone who witnessed this behavior repeatedly#again. i hope hes alive and well. the fact is him lying about this WOULD BE THE IDEAL SITUATION. BC NO ONE SHOULD GO THROUGH THAT. but.#he HAS to forever be the victim in his eyes. attempting doesnt automatically mean youre free of sin.#its just terrible to see that regardless whether or not he did do it#its very clear his attempts to run away from his consequences are working on some people#we need to acknowledge that if your shitty ex friend can weaponize a threat to kill themselves#so can this internet person after being called out for horrendous shit#like what was the alterative? what were people supposed to fucking do? be nice about it?#yeah as if poc and trans women arent historically given shit for being 'too mean' about wanting justice.#this isnt just the plagiarism this is the fact a white dude has been parading himself as THE speaker for the gays(tm) but has been using hi#gayness to shield himself from his misogyny racism transphobia and antisemitism#its very clear regardless this means that ppl r going to side with him and then give him benefit of doubt#if you cant handle the heat stay out of the fucking kitchen dude. this is the consequences of your fucking actions.#hes a disgusting person who cant handle being told no so hes going to drag everyone down with him#like. idk this entire situation is frustrating to me.#its also frustrating ppl trying to be moral abt it like 'see! i knew this was bad all along!' no you didnt. shut it.#for the record im like mainly talking abt twit watching those spineless uwu cutesy ppl basically saying hes done noting wrong#oh and also alt righters who are clearly weaponinizing this where u know they wouldnt give a shit if a right ytber did this.#james somerton#idk might delete this later its just. ugh...
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Ok I should make one thing a little clearer:
This is a 16+ blog, which means if you are under 16, you should not be interacting with me. Reblogs and likes are fine since I’m not posting downright inappropriate stuff, but you are absolutely not supposed to be sending me DMs. This includes asking me questions pertaining to anything ranging from fics to art; a DM is a DM.
I’m not here to baby you guys but I value responsible people who read and the like. Also if you are 13 and below then 1) get off tumblr and 2) you will be blocked if I know how old you are.
As of right now I’m still lenient with anyone above 13 sending me asks, but that may change. Basically please read my caption before you decide to interact
#I give people the benefit of the doubt and assume they’re reading my rules#so im hoping everyone in my dms are 16+ or else we got a problem :/#but there’s no way for me to tell for some of them so ig im putting my trust in them somewhat. I know what it’s like to#not want your actual age revealed so im not gonna demand ppl share their real age#though idk i might start asking if an age evasion happens again#like not their real age but if they are 16+#cjj sayeth#not gonna do a full minors dni yet though#maybe when I’m like. a little older
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God please tell me I ain’t the only person who aged Ben up for non sexual reasons 🫥 ya’ll already know I hate pervert Ben with a passion.
He’s a dead nineteen year old hacker ghost in my AU because I always thought it was weird that everything bizarre that happened in the OG story was done by a tweleve year old.
Ricky, when I catch you Ricky-
#out of kills (ooc)#creepypasta#creepypasta fandom#creepypasta ben drowned#ben drowned#creepypasta au#//I got no beef with a Ricky I just quoting the meme#//but yeah#//leave the blonde elf boy alone or else#//giving people the benefit of the doubt that they didn’t know his canon story age like I did#//BUT IF YOU KNEW AND YOU STILL DID IT SO HELP ME
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Five episodes is the end of my patience with constant/repetitive 'Oh but I think they're so good as platonic/Not everything has to be romantic' and considering there are still several of these posts after every episode in Sam's tags from people who literally never talk or post about Sam except for in relation to Evan anyway, I'm just going to start blocking people on first offense.
And again...this show is finished filming! Some people shipping SamxEvan while they watch the show now has absolutely no bearing on what happens in canon. So what is the point of all these posts? Go write an email to Dropout if you're so concerned about the sanctity of platonic relationships in this show.
Sincerely,
A black ace woman
#Again this is not my otp but I'm done giving white people the benefit of the doubt!#I am not asking you to ship this or explain to me why you don't#I am asking you to go to any of the dozens of other posts from people who feel the same way as you and have this convo there#sam black#sam britain#I can't emphasize to you enough that regardless of your personal motives or intentions#This is part of a pattern in the way white fandoms respond to ships that include black women#And I'm so tired
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cw: harry potter, jk rowling, transphobia
I occasionally see posts/get messages about the various harry potter references in the bright sessions, etc. and I've gotten a bunch of new followers recently so just so any new/younger listeners of my shows know:
jk rowling is a terrible transphobe whom I hold zero respect for and I haven't given a dime of my money to her since she revealed who she truly is. I want the whole bright universe to be a safe space for trans people (including the trans folks in our cast and crew!) and if I could go back and remove those references, I would. but I can't! harry potter was an extremely significant part of my life until...well, until it became very clear who she really was. it makes me so sad to think that folks might be finding TBS now and get thrown out of the story by these references, but just know that the people who made the show do not stand by jk, and that in many ways, the show is a product of its time.
#the bright sessions#harry potter#jk rowling#transphobia#I know there's PLENTY to say about the bigotry in the actual books and I think there's a lot of merit to those criticisms#and I'll own to choosing not to see some of that stuff before all this went down bc the books were meaningful to me#(this is not HP specific - another beloved childhood book series that was EVEN more formative to me growing up)#(is also something I've grappled with in recent years bc I think the author is actually probably wildly misogynistic)#(even though he's never behaved badly (far as I know) in his public life - there's stuff in the text)#BUT ANYWAY#it can be so hard to remember that we didn't have ANY inkling of her bigotry in this regard until 2018#all of the original run of TBS was written before that#and I'll admit I gave jk the benefit of the doubt in 2018 re: her liking that tweet! I wanted to give her a chance to learn and grow#and she did....not do that#but TAMA was written in that little grace period#and then a few references in TCT were taken out during recording bc june of 2020 was when she really started to go mask off#and so we were making changes in real time#we didn't know what to do about quidditch#bc we were like 'this is a sport that people play in college and it's just called that?'#'and it's already canon that caleb plays?'#and it wasn't called quadball yet#anyway not trying to make excuses!#just know that none of those references were put in with any malice#and I guess I *could* go back and rerecord all those lines and replace them#but I know enough about my original audio engineering to know that it woudl be VERY hard to make it sound natural#and idk I do think there's something to be said for not covering up errors in old work#I'm not going to try to pretend HP wasn't important to me#EDIT: I've turned off reblogs for this post#also this is not me trying to tell other people how to approach their own HP fandom#fanworks especially - there's no benefiting jo in that - and I think it's totally legit for ppl to want to take HP as their own!
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