#gimme a captain's hat

[arcielee]

When that first date chemistry is perfection 💖

[Thank you for these pictures @sylasthegrim 💜]

[arcielee]

Best we got was a snippet of Jace and the back of his boyfriend's head in Winterfell.

Really mad Jace doesn’t have a poster

[wonderjanga]

Marvel and the Street Kids

Billy likes helping people. Especially people who have, and are still going through something he’s also experienced. Hunger, brokeness, homelessness, if you’ve had to go through any of those things, Billy’s probably going to favor you more than most of the other people he’s saved. I mean, after all, he knows what all of that feels like. It’s why he helps out around soup kitchens a lot. It’s why he donates a hefty bit of his paycheck to homeless shelters and charities. It’s why he works to keep drugs off the streets, and crime at a low. He doesn’t want anyone, man, woman, or child to experience what he has. So, here’s a couple instances where he’s helping some homeless kids we know. (Btw this is the same AU as the Billy and the Robins post. In that post, basically Billy knew Dick and Jason when the two were both Robins) Roy: *in Speedy costume* “Hey Robin, who do you go to whenever you need advice?”

Robin!Jason: *in Robin costume* “Batman, why?”

Roy: “Right, cool. Cool, but what if you can’t ask him a certain question?”

Robin!Jason: “Oh, then I go to Marvel!”

Roy: “Marvel? Like Captain Marvel?”

Robin!Jason: “Yeah!”

Roy: “Huh. Uh… okay then.”

Robin!Jason: “Why do you ask?”

Roy: “No reason.”

Then, a little bit after Oliver kicked Roy out, Marvel was in Star City because Green Arrow needed him for whatever. As of now, Roy was walking down the street, upset because obviously. It’s been an about three days since he was kicked out by someone he considered his dad. All because he had a wee little problem with painkillers, and wee little problem with heroin. You’re supposed to help people who’re addicted. Especially if they’re family. You don’t just kick them out… right?

Roy: *walking down the sidewalk*

Marvel: *flying when he sees him*

Roy: *not paying attention*

Marvel: *flies down in front of him*

Roy: *bumps into Marvel* “Hey, watch where you’re goooo…wha…?” *slowly looks up until he’s craning his neck to look up at him*

Marvel: “Aren’t you GA’s boy?” *looks confused* “What’re you doing out this late?”

Roy: “What?”

Marvel: “Yeah! You’re uh…” *snaps fingers a couple times, thinking* “Speedy. Right?”

Roy: “Do I know you…?” *looks Marvel up in down*

Marvel: “Oh, my bad.” *holds hand out for handshake* “I’m Captain Marvel. I don’t think we’ve properly met.”

Roy: *doesn’t shake hand* “Well you already know me. I’m Speedy.” *shrugs*

They both talk. Marvel gets Roy to open up a bit after he gets the kid a hotdog. While they’re both sitting on a bench eating their respective hotdogs, (I saw the Marvel in civvies post and he’s wearing that exact fit. He magicked up the red sweater, the yellow hat, and the jeans so they could eat in peace) the archer remembers his conversation with Jason. So, he decides he might as well bite the bullet since his friend hyped up the guy so much.

Roy: “Hey… I gotta ask something.”

Marvel: “Hm?” *mid chew*

Roy: “You wouldn’t happen to know any good struggle meals, would you?”

Marvel: *finishes hotdog* “Yeah? I do. You wanna learn some?”

Roy: *hasn’t told Marvel about him being homeless now* “Yeah.” *takes bite of his hotdog*

Marvel: “Okie doki then.”

Roy: “You aren’t gonna ask why?”

Marvel: “It’s not really my place. Unless you want me to ask?”

Roy: “Nah, not really.” *finishes his hotdog*

Marvel: “Then I won’t.” *stands up* “Alright! To the nearest Chuck E. Cheese!” *points in a random direction*

Roy: *also stands up, raising a brow at him. Moves Marvel’s arm in the correct direction* “Why are we going to a Chuck E. Cheese?”

Marvel: “You’ll see. Cmon!” *starts jogging in the direction Roy corrected him to*

Roy: “Dude, wait up!”

When they’re now outside the Chuck E. Cheese…

Marvel: “Alright. So, here’s what you’re gon— Are you good?”

Roy: *out of breath because they just ran about three blocks* “Yeah… Yeah. I’m good. Just uh— gimme a sec.”

Marvel: *gives him until he feels better*

Roy: *looking better now* “So, what were you saying?”

Marvel: “Right, so what you’re gonna be doing is, see those tables?” *gestures to the booths through the Chuck E. Cheese’s windows. Some booths have leftover pizza and chicken wings in them*

Roy: *nods head*

Marvel: “Okay, great. So you’re gonna go steal all of that.”

Roy: *blinks at him before the most befuddled, bamboozled, puzzled expression crosses his face* “What?”

Marvel: “You’re going. To steal. All of that.” *gestures to the tables again*

Roy: *looks between Marvel and the tables* “Dude, I am not stealing scraps from the fucking Chuck E. Cheese tables.”

Marvel: “How else do you expect to get food then?”

Roy: “I don’t know! I expected you to teach me some cheap recipes or something stupid like that!”

Marvel: “Oooooooh, so you don't want struggle meals then.”

Roy: “No, I do. A struggle meal is something like a ketchup sandwich. This is way worse than a goddamn struggle meal.”

Marvel: “You and I clearly have different definitions of a struggle meal, but okay. Also, chill with the cursing, man. I can teach you something cheap if that’s what you actually want.”

Roy: “Okay then, thank you, because the day I need to steal scraps from a Chuck E. Cheese, is the day I lose my dignity.”

Marvel: “Yeah, yeah, come on. Let’s just go to a grocery store.”

Then, there was Cassandra Cain. She was homeless for about nine years before she went to Gotham when she was seventeen. During her homelessness, she never really stayed in one place. One of the places she ended up in was Fawcett when she was about sixteen. There, she met Captain Marvel. She man saved her from a mugging she was about to take care of herself.

Marvel: *staring at her because Solomon’s whispering about how she’s worthy*

Cassandra: *staring right back, picking up confusion in the man’s body language*

Marvel: “What’s your name, miss?”

Cassandra: *stares blankly at him* (Guys, this is before she learned most stuff. So she has no idea what he’s saying and has to go off of body language alone.)

Marvel: *stares back* “Can… You not speak?”

Cassandra: *continues to stare blankly*

Marvel: *sighs* “I’ll take that as a no.” *reaches into pocket dimension*

Cassandra: *startled when she sees half the man’s arm disappear*

Marvel: *pulls out some money and puts it in one of her hands* “Please take this. I can tell you don’t have a home. Starving isn’t fun.”

Cassandra: *sees understanding in Marvel’s body language and looks at the money in her hand then back at Marvel*

Marvel: *hovering off the ground* “Stay safe, miss.” *gives her a little wave before flying off*

Cassandra: *watches him go*

They meet more times after that, and soon, Cassandra ends up being one of the many homeless kids he checks up on. Cassandra comes to enjoy the man’s presence, and Marvel comes to enjoy hers as well. She eventually gets a really good read on the man after a while and he gets a good read on her. She even mimicked the man’s bodily expressions sometimes with a nod here, or a shrug there. Marvel even got to learn her name after she gestured to one of the other kids who had a cast on their leg. He guessed a couple times before he got her actual name. They ended up having to charade it, Beetlejuice style.

Marvel: “Cassie?”

Cassandra: *makes a so-so motion with her hand* (something she picked up from the man) *makes a motion that was supposed to convey it was longer*

Marvel: “Longer…?” *pauses to think for a solid 20 seconds* “Cassandra?”

Cassandra: *gives him a thumbs up* (another gesture learned from him)

Marvel: “Wait that’s actually your name?” *body language shows he’s happy he got it right*

Cassandra: *blankly stares* (Again guys, she has no clue what he’s saying)

Marvel: “Oh, this is awesome!” *body language shows he gets happier. He starts yapping about stuff*

Cassandra: *listens even though it’s all gibberish to her*

Cass liked that she could depend on someone. The man was… sunny. That’s the best way to put it. She liked listening to him talk. He never expected an answer or response. She liked that. She also liked that when she did try to respond, he was patient and did his best to try and understand her. Their friendship (sort of father daughter thing) continued until she was almost seventeen, and soon, things came to an end.

Marvel: “You’re leaving?” *body language shows concern*

Cassandra: *saw him look to the backpack stuffed with things for the trip to the next town. she nods her head*

Marvel: *body language shows disappointment for a moment before acceptance* “I see.” *gives her a warm smile* “It was nice knowing you, Cassandra.” *gives her same little wave he gave her when they first met* “I hope we get to meet again.”

Cassandra: *waves back unlike the first time they met and leaves*

They actually met again, unbeknownst to Marvel, when he was in Gotham to help Bruce with something. They got paired up together to go and do something for the mission.

Marvel: “You know, you remind me of this girl I knew from a while ago.”

Cassandra: *silence and a stare because she knows he’s talking about herself*

Marvel: “Yeah, she would’ve done that same blank stare too.”

Cassandra: *wondering how he knows she’s pulling the same face as herself*

Some goons decided to interrupt them before she could figure that out.

[n3on-graveston3s-calling]

The Hat Rule.

Characters: Portgas D. Ace, Buggy the Clown, Dracule Mihawk, Trafalgar Law [ uses they/them ], X-Drake / Gender Neutral Reader

Word Count: 2,422

Rating: Mature

Warnings: None

Author's Notes: I'm a sucker for the Hat Rule, sue me. Nothing but some subtle spice. Enjoy!

You would be lying if you said it hadn’t been thrilling to sneak up behind them and pluck the hat off their head. They were so attached to it, it was funny! Of course, sentimentality was one thing- but really, the way they had paused, reaching up to touch their head as if confused at the sudden loss had been far too comical for you to even consider not laughing at. But the moment they had turned, had called out your name-

You ran.

You had sprinted across the dock back towards safety, hat clutched in your hand as they followed after you. But you were faster- always had been quicker on your feet. You scurried up the gangplank, avoiding collisions with your fellow shipmates as you made your way below deck to your quarters. You thought you were safe, you really had! Taking a minute to catch your breath, you settled the hat atop your own head with a grin. 

Success! 

That is, until the door opened. You turned, eyes widening in surprise at the sight of the owner of said hat, leaning against the door with an expression that lingered between amused and… Something else. Something darker. You suddenly realized you had cornered yourself in your haste to escape- and now, you had nowhere to run. 

──Portgas D. Ace [ 353 ]

Your heart hammered in your chest as Ace chuckled, arms crossed over his chest as you leaned back against the opposite wall. “You had your fun,” he spoke softly, holding a hand out to you. “Now gimme my hat back.”

“No.” You replied defiantly, instead putting the hat on your own head. You turned, studying your reflection in the mirror on the wall, tilting your head to and fro as a smile curved your lips. “I think it looks better on me, really,” you couldn’t help but tease.

“There’s a rule ‘bout wearin’ someone else’s hat, y/n.” Ace sighed, stepping in, closing the door behind himself- and locking it, something that had your breath faltering. A rule? What was he talking about? It was just a hat! Even so, he crossed the room with a few strides, settling behind you. His hands smoothed across your hips, his head dipping down to press chaste kisses along your throat. “You wear the hat, you ride the sailor,” he murmured against the shell of your ear, his gaze finding your own in the reflection. 

Hunger. That’s what that expression was; his beautiful brown eyes dark in the soft light of the room. Your heart stuttered in its beat as he kept your gaze locked with his own, lips pressing over where your carotid artery lay in your throat. “Oh,” you whispered back, blinking slowly as his hands wandered. Fingers plucked at the edge of your shirt, dragging it up slowly with his fingers as they trailed heated paths across your skin. His Devil Fruit ability- oh, how you loved that. 

“Whattya say, y/n?” He asked, biting at your shoulder gently, not enough to cause pain but certainly enough to draw a gasp out of your lips. You nodded mutely, transfixed by your reflections as he grinned wolfishly over your shoulder. “That’s my baby.” A damn near growl as he tugged your back against his front, subtle grinds of his hips giving you a clear image of just how much he wanted you. 

You were suddenly glad you decided to steal his silly little hat. 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

──Buggy the Clown [ 464 ]

It had been a celebration. Another successful show, another successful tithe paid from the townsfolk. One of those rare times where your Captain was genuinely happy, laughing with his crew as the bonfire burned brightly on the beach. But you weren’t there- no, you were sitting on the throne in the center ring of the Big Top, orange tricorn settled atop your head as you waited. 

You didn’t have to wait for long.

“Y/n,” Buggy called out as he sauntered in, his gaze settling on your form sitting in his chair, wearing his hat. The sight had his breath faltering, had his mouth suddenly dry. You looked damn good sitting there, almost as good as he did. Your legs kicked up over the arm, your lips curved into a cheeky grin. His hat… His hat on your head. 

He approached slowly, the sounds of the celebration fading behind him as he reached the throne. “Look at you! All comfortable in my chair, wearing my hat.” He muttered, one hand grabbing your chin, forcing your head up and back to meet his gaze. The other settled on the top of the throne as he leaned his weight against it, hovering over you.

“Your hat?” You countered with faux confusion. You reached up, touching the tricorn. “I could’ve sworn this was my hat.”

“Brat.” Buggy hissed as you grinned. 

You leaned up, sitting upright as your legs shifted down from the arm of the couch. “Yeah? Am I?” You continued to taunt, watching as your lover’s gaze brightened with the game you had decided to play.

“Yaknow, there’s this funny little rule that comes with wearing someone else’s hat.” His thumb brushed against your lower lip. You leaned into the touch, gaze flickering down to his painted smile. 

“What is it?” You breathed as he shifted closer. When you’d stolen his hat, you’d let his hair down. Aquamarine tresses spilled over his shoulders, falling forward to cloak you, giving an odd form of privacy as his lips ghosted against your own.

“Wear the hat, ride the Captain.” Buggy murmured as he captured your lips in a kiss. Paint smeared against your skin as you reached up, tangling your fingers in his hair, drawing out a pleased hum from him as he pressed closer. 

You pulled back with a nip to his lip, watching the way he crumbled beneath you so easily. “Ride the Captain, eh?” The thought set a fire in you. You rose to your feet, swapping places with a hand against his chest, shoving him down into his throne. “I’ve always wondered what it would be like to fuck you here.”

“Shit,” he chuckled, hands settling on your waist as you took your place on his lap. “Keep the hat on.”

“Yes, Captain.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

──Dracule Mihawk [ 516 ]

You felt like royalty as you ran through the halls of the castle. Perhaps it was the romance novels you’d read over the years, but there was something particularly thrilling about running through corridor after corridor with the tricorn clutched to your chest. You found yourself in the library, chest rising and falling with deep breaths as you turned to face the doors. Any moment now, Dracule would walk in.

It was worth it. Grabbing his tricorn the moment he’d docked at the island, running as fast as your legs could carry you back to the castle. You worried your lip as you looked down at the black leather, fingers brushing against the stitching. After a moment’s hesitation, you raised the hat- and settled it atop your head.

The doors swung open. 

“Darling,” Mihawk drawled. Yoru wasn’t on his back; his coat had been discarded, no doubt left by the front entryway. He sighed, taking in the sight of you in the moment. Cheeks flushed, hat perched atop your head; you were bathed in the orange glow of the fireplace. The sun had already set behind you; no light spilled through the large windows. 

A piece of art, you were.

“I believe you have something that belongs to me.” Slow steps drew him closer, even as you took shorter steps backwards- until you stumbled, ending up on your rear on the rug before the fireplace. Mihawk chuckled as he stood over you, arms crossed over his chest.

You found your words at last, grinning up at your lover. “I dunno what you’re talking about.” Cheekily, you leaned back on your elbows as Dracule knelt, reaching out to cup your cheek gently. “All I have is this shirt… And this hat.”

“... That’s all?” His gaze flickered down to your legs- bare, he realized. When had you stripped your trousers? He was certain you had been wearing them when you met him at the dock. “There’s a certain tradition when you wear another’s hat.”

“Tell me about it.” You sighed as his hand smoothed along your calf, gently massaging the muscle. He moved slowly, crawling over your form as his hands left your leg and cheek, balancing his weight over you. He dipped his head, stealing a kiss from you that had your head swimming by the end of it. The ghost of a brush of his tongue against your lip before he parted; you leaned forward, chasing him. 

“Wear the hat,” he murmured as he shifted, arm curling around your waist. In a movement too quick to track, he’d rolled you both, settling you on his lap as he settled on the rug. His fingers gripped your thighs, dangerously high to rucking up your- no, that was certainly his- shirt. “Ride the pirate.”

“Oh,” you breathed, mind growing fuzzy with the lust that was beginning to course through your veins. You shift your hips slowly, feeling your lover respond in kind. A groan pulled free of you as your hands settle on his chest, fingers gripping at his shirt. “Oh, I think I like that one.”

“Good.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

──Trafalgar Law [ 450 ]

It was hard to hide in a submarine. This was your first- no, second- mistake. Taking your Captain’s hat was the first mistake. Hiding in the submarine was the second. And the third? Deciding to add insult to injury by hiding in their own quarters. Was it the brightest of ideas? No. But Shachi wasn’t going to let you get out of the bet without consequences, and like hell you were going to cough up five hundred berries. 

So, you stole Law’s hat. And then had run for your damn life. 

You could hear the heavy footsteps of their boots as they approached. You panicked- and tugged the white hat on as the door opened, revealing the frustrated face of Law. They paused, brow furrowing at the sight of you standing in the middle of their quarters. “The boiler room would have been a better hiding place,” they taunted sarcastically, closing the door behind themself before leaning back against it. 

“I uh, I panicked?” You shrugged, cheeks flushing with embarrassment. You reached up, patting the hat on your head. “I get why you wear it. ‘S comfy.”

“It looks good on you.” They admitted softly, pushing off the door to cross the room, settling before you. Their hand raised, brushing a strand of hair back behind your ear. “Almost as good as it looks on me,” they finished, lips curving into that signature cocky grin that had you stomach twisting. 

You reached out, settling your hands on their chest, “There’s this lil’ thing,” words barely above a whisper; they had to focus on you to really hear. “This lil’ rule I remember learnin’ about.”

“And what would that be?” They asked just as softly, hands settling on your hips, drawing you closer, pressing your form against their own. Their hands squeezed slowly, the pressure enough to draw a pleased sigh from you.

You leaned in, lips brushing against their ear. “If I wear my Captain’s hat- I have to ride them.” A nip against the shell of their ear had a shudder dancing across them. You could have sworn a soft ‘fuck’ had slipped free from them. “Is that right?”

They pulled back, hand coming up to grip your jaw. A mischievous light had settled in their gaze as they studied you. You weren’t sorry; not a single speck of sympathy lingered in your expression, in your words, in your teasing. “You are, y/n-ya.” They rasped as they leaned in, stealing a kiss. Their teeth grazed your lip as they guided you backwards, until the back of your knees hit the bed. You sank slowly, but they didn’t part- not until you pulled back, panting.

“Captain-”

“Keep it on.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: .☽ . :☆ﾟ. ───

──X Drake [ 399 ]

You had managed to stumble into your quarters on the Liberal Hind, only to realize that oh- well, shit. That’s a mistake. You curse yourself softly as you try to figure out how to get out of this mess. It had been a silly idea. You hadn’t seen your Captain laugh in a while- and thought that hey, stealing the hat would be funny!

Apparently not, given the yell that had come from him as you sprinted away. 

Your heart skipped more than one beat as the door to your quarters swung open, revealing the tall form of your Captain, X-Drake. You swallowed roughly around nothing as he studied you, brow furrowed. He ran a hand through his hair with a huff, stepping in and closing the door behind himself. 

Slowly, you raised the hat- and placed it on your own head.

Worth it, you thought to yourself as your lover’s eyes widened in shock as he turned around once more. “Missing something?” You teased, arms crossing over your chest as he studied you.

“That’s my hat.” He stated simply, taking a step forward. “Why did you take it?”

“Maybe I want it.” You shrugged, watching the way his eye twitched at the blatant insubordination you showed. Former Marines, always so strict. You worried your cheek as you glanced away. “I think it looks good, don’t you?”

“It…” He faltered, drawing in a slow breath. “It does look good, yes.” He crossed over to you, reaching out a hand to grasp the hat- only to pause. You were at port. The crew was working on supply runs. Alone on the ship. His hand lowered to tilt your chin up gently, his demeanor shifting as he tilted your head to the left- and then the right. “It suits you well,” he murmured, voice damn near molten gold with the way it poured over you. 

You shuddered, gaze rising to meet his own. “What’s that old saying… Wear the hat, ride the Captain?”

His jaw clenched; the hand on your chin flexed. Got him. “You’re nothing but trouble,” he groaned as his hands smoothed down your sides, hooking in the waistband of your trousers, tugging you closer to himself. “You need to be disciplined. Stealing from your captain…”

“Then do it,” you whispered, leaning in to ghost a kiss along his jaw. “After all, I did steal.”

“Turn around.”

“Yes, sir.”

[dafunzies]

no but WHY the team colors fit hogwarts!AU х f1 so much???

Gryffindor!Charles: he’s a mischievous brat, and nobody can prove me otherwise. prolly tricked the sorting hat into this (it wanted him to do Slytherin obvi). it’s his dream & legacy to be in Gryffindor, even tho their quidditch team objectively sucks, living off the memories and washed glory of the legendary potter. the chaser of the team, the new hope. cunty, charming, flirty, stubborn as hell. not so nice and angelic because the looks can lie. AND they do. has a fanbase, very sweet with them but not so responsive to the love confessions. they say it’s cause he’s a player. he’s not. or is he?

Slytherin!George: bro’s serving diva with the most flawless skin to the extent that even girls are jealous of him. knows a thing or two about beauty potions. seems cold-hearted, but well…, he secretly has a crush on his best friend. loves the rules, equally loves bitching about them. sometimes breaks those rules - with that one friend - because apparently none of them can sleep well at night when separated. oh, forgot to mention: he got it all planned and figured out, so you better fucking run

Ravenclaw!Max: he excuse me actually 🤓☝️ can be freaking annoying. a nerds nerd. it's nearly impossible to keep up with him, but he loves a good challenge. got the nerve to cross the line: he’s calculating, rational, and straightforward. manages emotions poorly, so prefers not to manage em at all and stays distant. kinda socially awkward, but once he feels comfortable enough to be around, can be pretty chill. both the best in studies and quidditch. sarcastic and rough on the field as a chaser/team captain. despite his own claims of being single, wears the hickeys so often that had stopped trying to hide them at all. and, frankly speaking, he dgaf.

Hufflepuff!McLaren: papaya boys perfectly represent the house duality— reserved introverted blushing oscar/outgoing oblivious social butterfly lando, matching each other’s freak & determination BUT not really because they are still very different + Renault Danny?? spectacular gimme 14 of those

bonus: everyone is doomed by a narrative

[xxchaosjojoxx]

Just one dance (Penguin x reader)

A/N: I need Penguin in a suit please. Gimme this please. If you draw him in a suit, withput hs hat or writing something like that as well tag me please. I am down for it. I couldn't help but blushing as well. We don't know what his hair looks like neither his eyes. I imagine him like this, hopefully it's ok for you even if he looks differently in your headcannon :3

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“Penguin, will you be my plus one?” You asked. Penguin looked at you with a shocked expression. “W-Why me?” He asked back.

We docked on this island yesterday evening and while we were exploring the island you met a familiar face. “Y/N is that you?” A pretty and tall blonde woman was looking at you with a big smile. Long story short. This pretty woman was your best friend since you could think. Her family moved away when you were 10 years old. Her father was the mayor of this village.

“Say, is there a festival going on?” You asked her and she responded with a smile. “Yeah we will celebrate a wedding and you my dear y/n.” She handed me an envelope “Have to come. I sent one to your mom a few months ago. But she told me that you were no longer on the island. Living your dream as a pirate. I assume the pirates outside are your crewmates?” She asked and you nodded happily why accepting the envelope. “Yeah they are like family. I don’t know If I could join, because we wanted to leave tomorrow. But I’ll ask my captain.”

You would love to attend the wedding of your old best friend. You cherished the memories with her in your heart.

“I would love to meet one of your crewmates. I’m sure you will join the wedding with one special person, huh?” She giggled at you while you were blushing. “Your mom told me that you met a nice pirate back then. He was your type. Well, we will see each other tomorrow night then.” With that she was gone. Soon enough you were looking for your captain and asking him a favor. After you told him the situation he was still looking grumpy at you. “Please Captain, she is my best friend. Pretty please?” You tried your best to give him the puppy look. “FINE! We can stay here for 2 more nights and you can attend the wedding party. BUT!” He pointed a finger at me. “No Hook ups. Capiche?”

Your face turned dark red. “W-What? I would never do that, you know that.”

With a happy smile you went shopping with Ikkaku and Bepo. Shachi agreed to do your hair before the wedding starts. He worked as a hairdresser a long time ago. This fact surprised you. So all you have to do is get a dress and get a dance partner. It didn’t take long as you found the most beautiful dress you ever laid eyes on. The last part on your list was getting a partner and you had the perfect match in your mind.

Back to the present you look at Penguin. “I feel comfortable around you and I don’t wanna be the only person attending this without having a dance partner.” You couldn’t tell him that you fell in love with him as soon as you saw him. He was the reason why you joined the Heart Pirates, but this was a thing that he doesn’t even need to know.

Penguin was nervously scratching his neck. “B-But I can’t dance plus I don’t even have a suit, why should I? It’s not necessary for us anyway.”

You looked at him with big eyes. “Pen please.” He sighed “C-Can’t I just go with ehm.. casual clothes?” You pouted. “I dunno. She is the mayor's daughter after all. Maybe Law has a suit for you? Or we can ask the stores if you can lend one?” He tried to resist your cute big eyes “Hng…OK FINE.” He groaned and blushed a little. “I will ask the captain or the shop owner.”

You beamed at him and hugged him tightly for a few seconds. “YOU are the BEST. One more thing tho.”

He was panicking. What more is there?

“Ehm… I suppose you have to go without your hat.. and ehm..” Penguin interrupted you with a loud “HELL NO!”

You were looking at him blankly. “This hat and me…we are one. ABSOLUTELY NOT!. Never. Nope! I’m sorry but no. Maybe you should find another person.” And with that Penguin stormed off. He felt insecure. Only a few people saw him without his signature hat. It wasn’t that he thought he would be ugly or something like that. He was scared that you wouldn't find him attractive anymore if you were able to see his messy black hair or his eyes that he tried to hide whenever you were looking at him directly.

You were heartbroken, you stumbled to the next bench, crying. It was not typical for Penguin to react like that. You realized that someone sat beside you, patting your back softly to comfort you. “It’s ok. Don’t cry please. I can’t handle this.” You recognize the voice of your captain, Trafalgar Law. With a sniff and teary eyes, you looked at him. Before you were able to speak, words came out of his mouth. “I have no idea why he reacted like that. I mean I can only guess. I can believe I’m doing this.” He was looking down on you, with a stern look on his face but a light blush on his cheeks. “I allowed you to attend the party, so if you want…I can accompany you. But I won’t dance. Ok?” You looked at him in shock. Never ever did you ever think that Trfalgar law, your captain, the surgeon of death, would say something like…this. You blinked a few tears away. Law was nervous. “We can still leave the island, if you prefer this.” He mumbled.

The day of the wedding arrived. After Ikkaku helped you with your dress, and Shachi did your hair, Law accompanied you like a gentleman to the wedding. He was wearing a suit, this was one of the rare occasions where you saw him without his hat on.

“Don’t stare at me or I’ll leave.” He said calmly. You were sitting there, enjoying the groom and the bride. Her wedding dress was beautiful. It was long, white with a heart necklace. It was her dream dress. You often talked about your wedding when you were younger. It was an emotional wedding. After the official part ended, Law excused himself to check on the Polar Tang really quickly. So while the rest were dancing inside, you were waiting outside, sitting on a bench. You could hear the music outside too. But now you were alone, sulking, feeling sad that you were left alone again. This was the perfect chance to get closer with Penguin, getting quality time with him. You sighed and you tried your best not to cry.

As you were looking down the ground you saw a pair of shoes before you. As you lit your head, you saw a young man before him. You never saw him, he was a total stranger to you. It was dark outside, so the lights from the party and the streets were shining on him. His right hand was at the back of his head, while he held his other hand towards you. He had black short hair and he really looked handsome.

“Excuse me.” You were surprised to hear his gentle voice suddenly. “C-Can I have this dance, by any chance?” He asked you nervously. It must have taken a lot of courage to ask a stranger this kinda question out of nowhere. You were stunned and were looking for Law.

“I am waiting for my partner ehm..” But you soon remembered that, even if Law would be there, he wouldn’t dance with you at all. With a sigh and a polite smile, you rose up and took his hand. “...I guess one dance is ok.” He was smiling at you and as you looked into his eyes you were stunned. His eyes were icy blues. They looked like the moonlight shimmering on the water. He positioned his hands nervously around you so he could dance with you slowly. “I’m not the best dancer. Sorry.” he said and looked at him with a smile. “Me neither.” Even though you never saw him, you felt pretty comfortable with him. His hands were warm, soft and still firm. His eyes were gentle and the most beautiful you have ever seen. This man was absolutely magnificent and everything felt so familiar. His smile, his voice, his touch. You felt happy just to see his smile.

The song began to slow dance and you automatically closed the distance between your bodies. You couldn’t help getting lost in his eyes, in his touch. He had control over you and it felt like a dream. As the song ended you both leaned in closer, there was just a little gap between your faces.

“You wanna dance with me again? Getting Lost in the moment one more time?” he asked you with a husky voice. You felt a shiver down your spine. You felt attracted to him, without any doubt.

“I.. I would love to.” You stuttered and looked between his lips and eyes. “But I can’t sorry. I am interested in someone and I wanna stay loyal to him, even if this love is one sided.”

You gazed into his eyes. “I am sorry. I really am.”

He was smiling sadly at you. “I see.” This handsome stranger was disappointed and so were you. “I guess you meant it earlier. That you just feel comfortable with me and need only a dance partner.” You were confused white he let out a low chuckle. “I guess it’s a good thing that the captain accompanied you for the official part at least. I mean.. Captain looks better in a suit than me, I suppose.”

You were blinking a few times as you tried to understand what the man in front of you talked about. Your hands cupped his face. “Pen..? Is that you?” You asked shyly and the man before you tried to avoid your gaze. “Yeah…who else? Captain said, you wanted to dance with me and asked me if I would be up for dressing like this for you at least for just one dance. Because I made you sad.. But I guess we were wrong.”

“Wait, Law said he had to check on the polar tang..not that you two were switching places. Not that I didn’t want to dance with you. I did. You were the one I wanted to go to this wedding in the first place.”

Penguin looked at you nervously. His eyes were staring into yours. “You..didn’t realize it was me?” You shook your head. “Your voice sounded familiar and your smile was as precious as I remember. But your eyes..” Penguin tried to cover his eyes with his hand, but you grabbed his hand. “Your eyes are the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

Penguin was blushing. “R-Really?” - “Yeah I was shocked that such a handsome stranger would ask me for a dance. I could see that it took a lot of courage.”

He gulped and squeezed your hand a little bit. “You look very beautiful tonight y/n. I mean you always look beautiful. Are you disappointed that it’s me?”

You smiled at him. “Of course not. Why should I?”

Penguin tried to find the right words. “You wanted to stay loyal to your heart. I’m sorry for crossing a boundary by trying to kiss you earlier. For a moment I thought you would want it too. But maybe it was just the heat of the moment and I-” You interrupted him with a gentle kiss on his lips. After a while you parted away and looked at him with so much love and affection in your eyes. “Wanna guess, why were you the only person I asked to accompany me? Because I have this silly crush on you. Captain couldn’t see me crying and offered to join me, so I could enjoy this evening without being alone.”

Penguin was speechless. “So you rejected me for…me?” You both chuckled. “I guess so.”

He leaned in, and as soon as you closed your eyes, you felt a pair of lips on yours. This moment was magical and you wished that this evening would never end.

[redriotinggg]

When Sanji is bitten by a spider that has eaten the Cupid-Cupid Fruit, the Straw Hats learn there is only one way to cure his illness.

A genuine love confession.

There’s only one crewmate capable of the job.

(read on ao3!!)

—

The Straw Hats have stopped at a small summer island to gather supplies, stock up on necessities, and do any repairs to the Sunny.

When the bulk of the hard work has been done, their captain insists on a bonfire, having found a perfect clearing in the forest.

Sanji’s by the grill, cooking up plenty of burgers, hotdogs, kebabs, and other barbecued treats to fill his crew’s voracious appetites.

He happily watches his crew enjoy their afternoon—Brook’s violin emitting a joyful tune, Nami and Robin engaged in an intense game of cards, Franky enthusiastically sketching something onto a large page, Zoro fast asleep on the grass, and Luffy, Chopper, and Usopp running around as they play their own variation of tag.

Perhaps Sanji’s gaze is drawn to one of his crewmates in particular, following the flow of his curly hair, smiling at the sound of his laughter.

Perhaps. Sanji won’t tell.

“Woah! Look at that!”

The rowdy trio’s game of tag comes to a halt at Chopper’s cry. Luffy and Usopp look to where the reindeer is pointing, their eyes lighting up when they spot the thing that caught his attention.

“Cool!” Luffy begins to race over, but he’s stopped by Usopp.

“Wait! Don’t run, you’ll scare it!”

The trio carefully make their way over to a nearby tree, their attention grabbed by a fairly large spider.

Sanji shudders when he sees the creature. He looks away, focusing on the food. He is not interested in the further details of their exploration.

Luffy, Chopper, and Usopp fawn over the spider, speculating on its species and origins.

“It’s markings kinda look like hearts,” Usopp observes. “They’re even a pinkish-red colour.”

“Aw, so cute!” Chopper squeals.

“I’m gonna name it Cupid!” Luffy declares. “That guy’s in charge of hearts ‘n stuff, right? This lil' girl could be his pet or something,” he laughs.

A bit later, Sanji calls out to them. “Oi, get your asses over here, the food’s ready! And wash your hands if you’ve been touching bugs!”

Saying their goodbyes to Cupid, the boys rush over to claim their dinner.

The crew happily enjoys their meal, thanking Sanji with wide grins that only get wider when he presents them with dessert.

As the evening turns to night, the crew wind down, packing away their belongings and making their way back to the Sunny.

“Are you sure we can’t stay and camp?” Luffy whines. “It’s like, the perfect night for it! We've got the perfect spot!”

“No,” Nami denies flatly. “We didn’t bring the stuff for it and it’s already getting late. Plus, I want to sleep in my own bed. Now hurry up and get going! Franky! Turn on your flashlights, I can’t see!”

“One set of nipple lights, comin’ up! Ow!”

Usopp and Sanji take up the rear, picking up the last of Sanji’s portable kitchen gear. The chef is happily listening to the sniper’s latest tale when he feels a pinch on his ankle.

“Ow! What the hell?”

“Sanji! Are you okay?”

“Yeah. I think something just bit me.”

Usopp looks in the grass, trying to find the culprit. When he does, he gasps. “It’s the spider from before! Cupid, why’d you go and bite Sanji? That’s not nice!”

“‘Cause it’s a good for nothing insect,” Sanji grumbles.

“Actually, it’s an arachnid—”

“You better not have poisoned me, you stupid bug,” Sanji yells at the spider, which scurries away.

“It’d be venom, not poison.”

“You are not helping!” Sanji snaps. “What is this, a Robin impression? Stop with the unnecessary bug facts, this shit hurts!”

“Does it really? You should get Chopper to look at it as soon as we get back to the ship. Here, gimme your stuff, I’ll carry if for you.”

“I can carry it myself, asshole. I’m not that weak.”

“Really? ‘Cause if you’re in pain, the Great Usopp would be more than happy to carry you back to the Sunny.” Usopp smirks and flexes his muscular arms, sending Sanji a wink.

Sanji pretends like his heart isn’t trying to escape his chest and throw itself at Usopp’s feet.

Internally, Sanji is a mess. Externally, he rolls his eyes and hefts his baggage further in his arms.

“You do two push-ups and think you’re a strong guy now, huh? C’mon, let’s go before any other bugs try to make a meal outta me.”

When they make it back to the Sunny, all of their things put away, Usopp continues to hover by Sanji, his concern rising with each passing moment.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Usopp asks. “You’re all red. You shouldn’t be sweating this much.”

“‘M fine,” Sanji mumbles. The way he sways on the spot doesn’t do much to help his case.

Usopp holds him steady, in full crisis mode as he watches the usually stable chef falter. He hoists Sanji in his arms, dashing to the infirmary. “CHOPPER!”

“What happened?” the doctor asks. Usopp puts Sanji on the bed and recounts the tale.

By now, the rest of the crew has come to investigate the cause of the commotion. They all stand in the doorway, shocked to see their crewmate suddenly so ill.

“It’s only been like 20 minutes! Why does he look bad already? Sanji, don’t die!”

Usopp’s dramatic cry unfortunately has some merit. Sanji doesn’t look well. He is the complete opposite of the perfect picture of health he was less than an hour ago. In just a few minutes, Sanji seems to have lost all of his energy. He’s flushed and sweating, breathing heavily and brows furrowed as he fights some type of pain. Even his usually shiny hair is limp and brittle-looking.

Usopp’s heart positively breaks at the sight.

“I can’t make him a proper anti-venom without knowing exactly what type of spider that was,” Chopper states. He clicks his tongue as he looks at the inflamed, red bite mark on Sanji’s ankle.

“Brook, you help me get Sanji out of this suit. Everyone else, get out so I can treat him. Now!”

The rest of the crew gather on the deck, concern on all of their faces.

“Usopp,” Robin says, pulling the sniper from his worsening spiral of anxiety. “You said Sanji was bit by the same spider that you saw in the forest, right? Draw me a picture. We can use it to get information from the locals.”

Usopp nods. He runs off to the galley and grabs a sketchpad nestled between Sanji’s collection of recipes and cookbooks. Before long, he’s got multiple drawings of the spider, complete with colours and accurate depictions of its heart-shaped markings.

Franky and Nami go to the hospital to ask about an anti-venom while Luffy, Zoro, and Robin go ask around town.

On the Sunny, Usopp paces back and forth, biting his nails and their beds away to nothing as worry engulfs him. He peeks into the infirmary, heart breaking a little more every time he catches a glimpse of Sanji’s pained face.

“Sanji will be alright,” Brook assures him when he exits the room. “He’s stable for now. Our cook is strong. He’s got the best doctor caring for him and crewmates desperately seeking out information. He’ll pull through.”

Usopp tries his very best to believe him.

The rest of the crew returns to the Sunny in less than an hour. Everyone, except Sanji, who’s resting in the infirmary, gathers at the kitchen table.

“Turns out that our little spider has eaten a Devil Fruit,” Robin tells them. “Everyone in the area is familiar with the spider that has eaten the Cupid-Cupid fruit.”

“Wait, the spider is actually related to Cupid? That’s hilarious! I’m like a fortune teller! Hahahaha! Ow!” Luffy rubs his sore head, pouting at Nami.

“A bite from the Cupid Spider can do multiple things, depending on who is bitten," Robin continues. "However, it only causes illness in someone who has a requited love but has not actually expressed their love. To save Sanji, whoever is in love with him must tell him the breadth of their true feelings, lest he remain bedridden forever. Or worse.”

The crew sits in silence for a moment, reflecting on the information.

“Alright, who’s in love with Sanji?” Luffy demands.

All eyes go to Usopp.

He is so red in the face Chopper is concerned he'll pass out. His eyes are so wide Zoro wonders if they'll pop out of his head.

"What are you waiting for?" Nami cries. "Get in there and confess your love so Sanji gets better!"

"I-I-I-I-I-I'm not—"

"Oh, please, this is not the time for your anxious, denial bullshit! Go fix Sanji!"

"Can't we just kill the spider instead?" he suggests meekly.

Luffy and Chopper gasp in betrayal.

"That would be a bad idea," Robin warns. "That spider is very well-respected on this island. Causing it harm would no doubt incur the wrath of all the locals. There is nothing you can do but speak from the heart."

"You got this, Usopp-bro! Just tell Sanji how you feel! It'll turn out super!"

On stiff legs and with wobbly knees, Usopp leaves the galley and makes his way back to the infirmary, deaf to the sounds of his crew's encouragements.

Despite his desperate pleas to the universe, Sanji is awake when Usopp steps inside. He looks even worse than before. His skin is pale, covered in a sheen of sweat. His eyes are lidded and he's got bags under them like he hasn't slept in days. But even still, a smile lights up his face when he sees the sniper.

"Usopp," he says, voice quiet and raspier than usual. His smile is no less bright.

"Sanji," Usopp returns, taking a seat next to the bed. "I've got news. So, turns out that the spider that bit you has a Devil Fruit power."

Sanji scoffs. "Of course it does. Just my fucking luck. So, what? It ate the Sick-Sick fruit and now I'll feel like shit forever?"

Usopp chuckles drily. "No, nothing like that. We can actually help you pretty easily. Or, I can, anyway. I just... I have to... to..."

The sniper closes his eyes as a fresh wave of anxiety washes over him. He can't do this! It's too scary! But he has to.

How many times has he been in this position? Forced to watch someone he loves suffer from an illness, unable to do anything but try and distract them from their pain.

This time is different. Usopp can stop this. He can stop Sanji's suffering. All he has to do is be honest.

Well, best to rip off the band-aid.

Taking a deep breath, Usopp grabs Sanji's clammy hand in both of his. "I love you!"

"I-I've loved you for a long time, Sanji," Usopp admits, and the words start flowing, unable to stop. "I don't know when exactly it started, but I know that I do because I think you're so amazing! You're so cool, and strong, and talented. I love that you act all grumpy but you're actually extremely kind and considerate. I love spending time with you! I love it when you tell me stories about Zeff and the Baratie. I love that you always ask me questions when I'm telling you about something because you make me feel heard. I love that you always wrap your arms around me when we party. I love it when you smile at me and dance with me.

"I love how you look in the early morning and when the sun is setting. Well, I love how you look all the time because you're so gorgeous it isn't fair! All handsome and pretty at the same time. You dress nice, and you smell nice, and you make me food and protect me—! Sanji, I love you!

"I'm sorry it took a stupid spider to force me to say it but I lov-"

Usopp's speech is cut off as desperate lips meet his own. He melts into Sanji's embrace, returning the kiss with all he's got. His heart is beating so fast he thinks it might pop right out of his chest, but nothing could possibly take him away from this moment.

When they pull apart, foreheads resting against one another, Usopp is taken aback by Sanji's appearance. He looks as healthy as ever, save for his very intense blush. But his eyes are shining and his smile is hopeful and adoring.

"Do you mean it, Usopp? Do you really feel that way about me?"

"I do. A-And you? D-do you feel...?"

"The same," Sanji promises. "Everything that you said, I feel the same way. Usopp, I love you! I—did you really just cure me with a love confession?"

Usopp blinks, and then he bursts out into laughter. Sanji joins him, the two holding one another as they laugh at the absurdity of the situation, their hearts full to bursting.

"Anything is possible on the Grand Line," Usopp reminds him. "Especially for the number one lover on the seas, the great Captain Usopp!"

"Number one lover, huh? I don't know if I believe that." Sanji pulls Usopp in close, whispering into his ear. "I think you'll have to show me."

"T-that can be arranged."

Usopp leans in and Sanji goes to meet him, lips pressing together again, and again, and again.

[ikkaku-of-heart]

@cathiief asked:🔥🔥🔥 gimme gimmeeee Send me a “ 🔥 “ for an unpopular opinion.

🔥Listen up, fandom; bisexuality exists and just because a female character thinks another is pretty doesn't instantly mean she's a lesbian. There are other sexualities out there. I constantly see bi-erasure everywhere and it's why I will NEVER write Ikkaku as a lesbian. She is bisexual and demiromantic and the more fandom tries to use that utterly wretched scene in the Blackbeard fight as "proof" she's a lesbian the more I will commission her in m|w ships to spite them (I of course already would want the commissions but spite gives me extra motivation). Yes, Ikkaku is attracted to women and I've headcanoned that for years. But I've also seen bisexuality ignored as a possibility and erased in fandoms for so long that it gives me the ick to even entertain the thought of her being a lesbian. Honestly, because of the way fandom is, I'll never write a lesbian muse unless it's stated in canon. Bisexuality exists and deserves to be acknowledged and celebrated in fandom, not demonized and ignored. So Ikkaku is bisexual and no one is changing my mind. Ever.

🔥While Oda drawing female characters looking similar is annoying, I honestly don't care that much about the lack of body variety in One Piece because what he does instead is craft complex, interesting women with unique personalities, backstories, and abilities. That's far more important to me. I didn't care that all my Barbies had the same body type: I cared that they had different jobs and I gave them all unique personalities and I could tell them apart easily that way. Yes, representation and body diversity are great, but I'll take well-rounded, well-written female characters over that any day.

🔥I'm happy Yamato didn't join the Straw Hats. I was never on the Yamato hype train to begin with, but I think him not joining is important because if he had, that would have taken away from Jimbei's development as a Straw Hat. Fish Dad needs to understand and adjust to the madness of his new captain and crew. Yamato joining would have put the focus on him and not Jimbei, and I don't like that. So I gave a massive sigh of relief when Yamato stayed behind on Wano.

[supermarine-silvally]

Favorite 5 one piece characters and 5 you feel meh about

oooh it's so hard to choose! (especially for my faves heheh) but I've gotta go with...

Favourites:

note: not including Luffy because he's the main character

#5 Roronoa Zoro

I mean... he's Zoro. I don't know if it's possible not to like Zoro. For me, what elevated him beyond "he's extremely cool" to his current status in my top 5 faves was the "nothing happened" moment at the end of Thriller Bark. It really solidified his loyalty towards Luffy and the lengths of which he's willing to go to protect his captain and friends.

#4 Mr. 2 Bon Clay

Oh Bon-chan <3 When I started One Piece I never would've imagined to come across an explicitly queer character written in such a sympathetic way; who goes from being a minor villain to a beloved ally whom Luffy loves and respects. I love Bon-chan a lot and the ending of Impel Down is one of my favourite character moments in the entire show. Also the "queers never die" moment? Iconic.

#3 Yamato

As a transmasc person myself, there's no way I couldn't vibe hard with Yamato. I love everything about him, from his personality to his design to his insanely cool Devil Fruit abilities. I REALLY want to see him become a Straw Hat at some point in the future.

#2 Nico Robin

I LOVE Robin. My favourite Straw Hat hands-down. She's so beautiful and smart and has such cool abilities and plays such an invaluable role in the story. Her backstory is so heartbreaking and I truly believe that it's no exaggeration to call Enies Lobby peak One Piece. The "I want to live" moment is my favourite in the entire series. Watching Robin struggle with whether she deserves to be saved and her realising her friends are willing to go to war with the world to save her is just asdkjhsdf I love it and I love her pls marry me Ms Nico Robin

aaaaaaand to nobody's surprise, the number one spot goes to.......

#1 Portgas D. Ace

I love love love love LOVE Ace. From the moment he was first introduced in Drum Island to the childhood flashbacks of the postwar arc that laid out his story in full, I fell in love with everything about him and his character. He's insanely cool and silly and gorgeous and tragic and I have no idea how Oda managed to pack it all into one character but somehow he did. I tend to also be a sucker for older sibling characters since I myself am the oldest sibling in my family so I relate hard to that, too. I could write entire essays about how much I love Ace and why he is such a fantastic character but I think I'll leave it there for now lol also I own so much Ace merch it's ridiculous

The "Meh" Characters (I'm taking this to mean characters I am moreso indifferent to rather than ones I outright hate, which is a different list lol):

#5 Buggy

Controversial take, I know lol but let me preface this by saying I don't dislike Buggy-- I actually enjoy him in a lot of scenes, especially in Impel Down. But overall, I think he's overrated and I just don't vibe with his blowhard personality. And there were definitely moments in Marineford that I just found myself getting really annoyed with him (yeah yeah I know he was supposed to lighten the mood and all that but every time the scene cut back to him I was just like ugh gimme the Whitebeard Pirates back).

#4 Gecko Moria

Kind of a lacklustre villain for me, especially in comparison with the other Warlords. He feels like he really shouldn't have earned that title. All around just kind of whiny and annoying. (I love Thriller Bark, I just don't like Moria very much-- or at least don't think he reached his full potential as a villain in the way Crocodile and Doflamingo do).

#3 Foxy

Long Ring Long Land is my least favourite arc and while I did enjoy his fight with Luffy, I just found Foxy super irritating. Not enough to hate, but enough to make me go "oh thank god" when the arc was finally over.

#2 Sengoku

This fucking guy. He's not as outright fascistic as some of the other Marines like Akainu, but doesn't have the depth of Garp and or the ambiguity of Aokiji/Kuzan. There are some moments where the narrative tries to make him more sympathetic in ways that I don't think he deserves at all, considering his position within the Marines and his dedication to perpetuating the brutal oppression of the World Government and I will NEVER forgive him for basically ritually humiliating Ace atop the execution platform in a way that was, frankly, really cruel. He's just not interesting or developed enough for me to enjoy his presence in the story as an antagonist.

and my number one "I couldn't care less about this character" is......

#1 Enel

Okay. I like Skypeia as an arc. It has some great moments, like the ringing of the bell and the resolution of the story of Montblanc Noland and Calgera, but I just found Enel a really boring villain, especially in comparison to the major villain before him, Crocodile. I find him unappealing to look at (his face is just so punchable) and every time he was on screen I just wanted him to go away. He's not an interesting character to me and I don't understand how he has any fans whatsoever.

[blackhakumen]

Mini Fanfic #1136: Sunset Comfort Buddies (SSBU X Kingdom Hearts)

6:56 p.m. Outside of Destiny's Island.............

Pit: (Watches the Sunset While Sitting Next to Sora on a the Sandy Beach) You know, I should really watch the sunset more often. It's so bright and pretty to look at......

Sora: ('Sighs Relaxingl') Ain't that the truth....It's so pretty that it kinda makes you wanna forget about all bad, stressful days you had to deal with. (Crosses his Arms While Grumbling) Especially one involving Yen Sid and that stupid, dumb exam he kept mentioning over and over again like a stupid record!

Pit: Yeah- Wait. (Eyes Starts to Widened as He Turns to Sora) What?

Sora: (Realizes What He's Doong Quickly Turning to Pit Before Apologizing) Sorry! Sorry.....Didn't mean to ramble on like that. It's just.....('Sigh') I dunno....

Pit: (Starts Getting Worried a Bit) You had yourself a bad day today?

Sora: Sort of? I mean, I wouldn't say it's the worst day in the world. (Turns Away While Pouting Again) It was more frustrating if anything......

Pit: You wanna talk about it? I'm an above average listener.

Sora: (Chuckles Lightly While Turning Back to Pit) Dude, you're a great listener! (Frowns a Bit) But are you sure you want me to tell you everything? I don't want my ranting to sour the mood for both of us, you know?

Pit: (Casually Shrugs) Hey, if it helps you feel any better, then I don't mind. Gimme your best shot! (Forms a Bright, Reassuring Smile on his Face)

Sora: (Smiles Back at his Angel Friend) Thanks, man. (Tales a Deep Breath Before Speaking) Okay, so, earlier today, Riku and I visited others at Yen Sid's tower. You know, the wizard guy in all blue, with a pointy hat.

Pit: And the long beard?

Sora: Yeah, exactly. So, we went to his tower and discuss the few missions coming up in the near future. I asked if I could help Riku out with his since the missions he got are way more tougher than the ones we usually get, but he turned my request down. (Place One Side of His Cheek onto the Palm of his Hand While Rolling his Eyes) "I'm not on the same skill level as Riku is currently" he says, "Still have a lot to learn about being a proper Keyblade Warrior" he says. Which.....he's not entirely wrong on both fronts, but he could at least take the time to get out of his office and see how much I've grown since the day I took the Mark of Mastery Exam rather than assuming I don't have what it takes at all!

Pit: Mark of Mastery Exam?

Sora: Is this exam Riku and I took a while back to see which one of us is fit to be the Keyblade Master. I failed at the last second and Yen Sid hardly ever let me live it down ever since.....

Pit: Yeesh.....You ever thought about talking to him about it sometime?

Sora: At one point I did, but I didn't wanna bother him in any way, you know? Plus, I doubt he'll care too much about listening to other people's dilemmas, let alone mines.

Pit: I see......Do you, by any chance, ever get jealous of Riku of being the Master instead?

Sora: Not completely? I mean, I was a bit bummed out that I wasn't one alongside with him at first, but it didn't stop me from being happy for him! (Sighs While Looking Away a Bit Sadly) If anything, I'm more worry about if I was ever good enough to become a Keyblade Wielder to begin it......

Pit: ('Sigh') I know what you mean.....I can't tell you how many times I've questioned and doubted myself as the captain of mom's army thanks to a few bad impressions of me.....

Sora: (Eyes Begins to Widened as He Let's Out a Gasps, Turning to Pit) People having bad impressions of YOU of all people!? Blasphemy!

Pit: (Chuckles Lightly) It's true! A loooot of people in the Angel Land didn't think I have what it takes to protect mom, let alone fight alongside her. Even some of the gods and goddesses think I'm unworthy. But eventually, I realized that their thoughts on me doesn't really hold that much weight on me as I keep improving myself for the better.

Sora: Which his something I should've done from the start, huh?

Pit: (Smiles a Bit Sheepishly) Pretty much, yeah.

Sora: (Groans While Facepalming Himself) Vantias' right, I AM eally am a moronic doofus!

Pit: (Starts Pouting a Bit) Hey. You are not a moronic doofus. You're Sora, a proud Keyblade Warrior who's gonna be the best that ever was one of these days and is going to keep doing his best regardless of what anyone else thinks, am I right?

Sora: (Takes Another Deep Breath Before Giving Pit a Firm Nod of Agreement With Determination Written All Over his Face) Right! I made it this far not to quit now. (Place his Hand onto Pit's Shoulder) But Pit......

Pit: Hm?

Sora: I don't care what anyone says......(Gives his Angelic Friend the Sparkling Eyes) You'll always be worthy in my eyes.

Pit: (Almost at a Loss of Words as his Eyes Begins to Sparkle as Well) Sora.......You'll always be worthy in my eyes too~

Dark Pit: (Walks Out of Destiny Trio's House Along with Vantias) Hey! Idiot Twins!

Vantias: Riku says dinner is re- (Notices Sora and Pit Staring at One Another in the Distance Before Squinting at the Both of Them) What the hell are those two doing over there?

Dark Pit: Probably something weird and stupid again. Wanna head back inside?

Vantias: (Turns to see Kairi, Viridi and Kirby Menacingly Glaring at Him and Pitto Through the Windows Inside) I would if those three weren't giving us death glares right now.

Dark Pit: (Sighs While Pinching the Bridge of his Nose) Of course.......

@cyber-wildcat

@albion-93

@ma-lemons

@26shann

@caleb13frede

[colleenmurphy]

"I dunno about you Helene but when I opted for the all inclusive package I didn't know that meant our husbands were piloting our private plane. Is he still dancing with the captain's hat on?"

Colleen cast a side long look her husband's way and then shook her head laughing before letting out a startled squawk as a tiny denim speedo hit her square between the eyes and landed in her lap. Her cheek flamed a shade of red usually reserved for fire trucks or city hydrants.

"I hope you have a room 'cause you're not rooming with me!"

"Already booked the presidential! I'll leave a key at the desk for you my lovely lady."

A fumbling stumble and then a hushed hurried discussion.

"It's not funny gimme my pants, Joey. Did they pay you to do this?"

A tanned weathered face popped up from behind the cockpit curtain an embarrassed smile spreading as a pitchy voice requested his speedo as well as the remains of his dignity back.

"I seem to be having some technical difficulties in the clothing department so I'm going to have to ask for you to return the Captain's drawers back...please."

From somewhere in the cockpit next to a snickering copilot Joey Larsson saw a sight he never thought he'd have to. His wife's best friend's husband, virtually his brother in law for God's sake was try color. A deep tan from the outdoor work he did, white from the covered bits, and whatever wasn't tan or white was a deep scarlet shade of red.

"Hey Bruce...anyone ever tell you about a full body blush?"

[malaisequotes]

“‘That’s definitely me, alright? Alright. I was the first one to notice when the captain was dead and I called dibs on the ship, alright? So this ship is mine. I’m the captain. Gimme that hat!’ ‘Dibs—’ He makes for the hat.”

Skyjacks

[221b-sociopath-street]

#ted lasso for dummies

Intro Part 1

01×02 Biscuits

00:00:22 'Nestlé Shredded wheat'* *This stuff is for real - Whole Grain Wheat Cereal Biscuits. These type of breakfast food are not in shape of liked by everyone little squares, loops, balls or stars. These are fucking food BRICKS. So I really share Ted's shock.

00:02:37 'The Spice Girls.'* *It's like my childhood all over again. Phrase 'girl power' it's about them, about Spice girls, well-known and beloved all over the world british girl group. Scary Spice, Sporty Spice, Baby Spice, Ginger Spice, Posh Spice! P.S. Plus one of them is wife of football player, former captain of the England national team - David Beckham 😎. So, the theme of football is also present in this conversation between Ted and Rebecca.

00:02:45 'The Gambler himself, Mr. Kenny Rogers'*

*So, here Coach Lasso introduces us to the specific work (song The Gambler) of an American musician (Kenny Rogers). Erm, I must admit that I googled this guy, he and his work were not popular in my country. But this song definitely have Ted Lasso vibe, maybe because of country notes which take us to Kansas - homeland of our coach 🤠.

00:04:30 'We're gonna call this drill The Exorcist, because it's all about controlling possession.'* *Only Ted could compare football strategy with the demonic possession of a young girl and her mother's attempt to rescue her through an exorcism by two Catholic priests, depicted in classic American horror movie 😬.

00:06:15 'Boy George.'* *And another one musical icon from GB. You will recognize him by his soulful voice and his androgynous appearance, large hats and bright make-up.

00:12:05 'Best concert, we got Beastie Boys.'* * Yet another legend in musical industry from America. Beastie Boys are considered very influential in both the hip hop and rock music scenes, with 7 platinum albums and over the top sales in rap genre.

00:12:09 'Actually, did y'all get the O.J. trial over here?'* *And another one football related topic: the case against O. J. Simpson, a former National Football League (NFL) player, broadcaster and actor, acquitted for the murders of his ex-wife and her friend. However, Ted somehow randomly mentions this case in a conversation with Rebecca and Higgins.

00:14:10 'And if we were the Rolling Stones...'* *I must say it's some musical episode! Jamie's comparison of himself to Mick Jagger and Roy to Keith Richards is just gold, but partly accurate! The Rolling Stones - british rock band with over six decades history. Jagger and Richards are the same age, but yeah former one is a front man and latter is like in background, just like our fellas on football pitch.

00:15:19 'Ernie Lounds, The Sun'* * The Sun is bright example of fake media. Among brits it's known for spreading lies about various topics: government, celebrities etc. And football related fact: 'In Liverpool they hate the Sun because of the Hillsborough disaster. Liverpool is a great City proud of their football team. The Hillsborough disaster involved the horrible death of many football fans. The cause was bad policing and the collapse of a terrace at a football match. The Sun blamed the Liverpool fans and spoke all of the dead'

00:16:56 '... the best barbecue sauce in Kansas City.'* * Oh man, Americans and their love for all things barbecue! BBQ is just like national sport for them, witch will be not fully experienced without good BBQ sauce. Ted's favorite:

00:25:05 'Little Phife Dawg and Q-Tip comin' at you'* *Once Phife Dawg and Q-Tip, were members of the music group - A Tribe Called Quest, which split up because of creative tensions between former and latter, who were both vying for greater control of the group's direction. And I personally think that this life story greatly illustrate the current situation in FC Richmond.

[starsgift]

Jinx in the costume of a century, the overzied glasses and captains hat, has waltzed up to the counter at asras job (That he's barely taller than, only being able to see over with his eyes if he lifts his head) and slams fake money he obviously made himself onto it. " GIMME ON CHICKY NUGGETS. SUPER QUICK. LARGE. ACTUALLY, A THOUSAND. FOR ME AND MY NORMAL FRIENDS."

✦.  —  Asra has only had this job for a little over a month now; maybe Eshu showing up mid-shift shouldn't be a surprise after they lost their last job. Somehow, it was. They knew it was them the MOMENT they heard shrill screams of the customers – long before they saw the lower form's bouncy waltz to the counter they stood at. Standing up front wasn't something they were TRAINED in at this point, they usually worked in the back, but they were covering for a coworker who clocked out for break.

What a time to be up front, they thought as Jinx grinned up at them taking notice of the other forms... in a trench coat(?) BEHIND them. Dual colored eyes blinked at the deity – flickering back and forth – their mouth thinned into a line.

❛  Jinx....?  ❜ how the fuck were they supposed to tell all the forms of Eshu that they sold SANDWICHES, not chicken nuggets?

[procrastinatorproject]

Continuing from yesterday, this is a slightly longer bit. And this chapter is getting completely out of hand 🙈 But I guess self-indulgence is allowed, right? What are we writing for if not to give ourself the kind of story we'd want to read, no matter how indulgent?

So here goes.

(Also, because I realize I forgot to actually put in the link yesterday: Gimme a prompt and I'll see what I can do!)

---

An angry beep from the biobed made Emil look up from his work. Captain Rios was just swinging his legs over the edge of the bed.

The EMH dismissed his screen and drummed his fingers on the gleaming table. “You know, I will tie you to that bed if that’s what it takes to finish the scan.”

Rios jumped and turned towards him looking startled and guilty. “Oh. Sorry, I was just…” He rubbed the back of his neck and mumbled something into his beard.

“What was that?” Emil got up from his chair and walked to the back of the room so he could tower over Rios.

The captain ducked his head again. “It’s not… I just…” He trailed off, then he took a deep breath, straightened, and looked Emil straight in the eye. “I’m sorry, Doc. I guess I forgot about the scan. I’m just… really hungry. And I figured I’d go grab some chirimoyas from the mess replicator.” He gave the EMH a roguish grin. “Maybe you should tie me down, before I go wander out of an airlock because I thought it was the way to the pantry…”

Emil shoved his hands into his pockets and leaned back on his heels. He had known Captain Rios for quite some time now and had seen him in many different moods, but this was probably the first time he found himself on the receiving end of (and completely disarmed by) the captain’s charm.

Suddenly, it made a lot more sense how Rios had managed to ascend through the ranks of Starfleet at such a young age and to earn the loyalty of so many crew mates that would still occasionally check in on him, even two years after he had left the service. With his Emergency Holograms, Rios was mostly a cantankerous task master and existentialist misanthrope. They barely got any glimpse of the man he was underneath the layers of untreated depression and self-imposed isolation. Of who he might have been before whatever had taken place on the ibn Majid facilitated his dismissal from Starfleet.

Emil certainly never got to see through the cracks. He suspected some of the others might, but with his EMH, the captain was was barely anything but brusque and frustrated. So, Emil was completely unprepared for Rios to suddenly not only admit to and apologize for a mistake, but to smile at him over a shared joke.

Emil shook his head, trying to stop his algorithmic mind from reeling. “I suppose I can ask the Emergency Hospitality Hologram to put together a light lunch,” he said finally. “Though the tropical fruit will have to wait for another day or two.”

Rios grinned. “Thanks, Doc.” He stretched, stifling a yawn. “Emergency Hospitality Hologram, eh? That’s pretty swanky. Those things are brand new.”

“Quite.” Emil brought up the back of the biobed and gestured for Rios to lie back down. Once again, the captain complied without even a hint of protest. Emil re-initialized the neural scan and then called up various visualizations of the captain’s vitals, just to give his fingers something to do.

“I met an ENH once,” Rios mused. “Cheerful guy, had some kind of accent…” He frowned, then he shook his head. “Maybe it was an Engineering Hologram. I dunno.”

“I’m sure it’ll come back to you, Captain.”

“He was wearing some kind of hat, I think." For a moment, the captain was lost in thought, then his face brightened again and he said: "I think it’s really neat that you guys can choose your appearance at will.” He craned his neck to look at Emil, who was reading through some scanner data. “If I was a hologram, I’d change my appearance every day. Don’t feel like meeting people today? Just turn into bird and hide on a cupboard or something, where no-one will see you.” He reached a hand for the ceiling. “Or you could turn into an admiral and play a prank on your captain.”

“Hm.” Emil was only half listening. His focus was still on the partial scan results, trying to make sure the repeated interruptions hadn’t caused any data-corruption. “Of course, if you can look like anyone, be anyone, being yourself becomes a bit of a conundrum," he said absent-mindedly. "I would imagine that is why so many of us stick with the way we look upon first initialization. To remind ourselves that just because our exterior can change at will, that doesn’t mean our personalities are easily mutable as well.”

[monsters-conquer-the-world]

So with Birdo joining Mario Kart 8 this month, we also found out that there are FIVE MORE characters getting added alongside future track packs. Awesome. Fucking radical.

BUT WHO!?! The only hint Nintendo has given is a quote that states: “Two upcoming waves of DLC are still to come, featuring more returning courses and characters from across the Mario Kart series”.

With that in mind, here is my baseless speculation, hopes, dreams, and armchair IP management.

Diddy Kong - After appearing in Double Dash!! and MK Wii, I was surprised he wasn't in 8 from the get-go. He's also in MK Tour! He's a 3-timer! He has cachet and cred, but he's not my favorite potential Kong addition. I'd be happy to see him, but I'd rather see Funky Kong or Dixie Kong.

Paratroopa - Nothing against Paratroopa, but I think we have Koopas covered with Koopa Troopa and Dry Bones. If we're getting a new low-level mook driver, it really, REALLY should be Goomba. Yeah he hasn't been playable in a Kart yet, but the track packs have included plenty of brand-new courses.... who's to say a newbie or two can't slip in?

Petey Piranha - Nintendo loves this big dumbass. He's not my top choice, but he's funny and weird. More Mario Sunshine/Double Dash!! representation is fun too.

Pac-Man - Yeah here's a wildcard. MK8 already has Link, Animal Crossing Villagers, Splatooners, and Miis... who's to say they couldn't branch out to Namco? He's already shown up in two different Mario Kart arcade games!

R.O.B. - Another longshot, but he was playable in MK DS! My personal R.O.B.-stalgia has come and gone, but I wouldn't kick the funky little robot out of kart either.

Honey Queen - She's only been in MK7, but a little more Galaxy representation would be cool. I also love that she's a heavyweight. A big cute fluffy bee is a charming alternative to the beefy lunkheads and villains that usually dominate that weight class.

Wiggler - Wiggler was also only playable in MK7, but he's also been a staple of the Mario franchise since his debut in Super Mario World 100 billion years ago. Another big cute bug, but with a little more cachet and cred. Bonus points for forcing Wiggler to drive the car shaped like him.

Pauline - The mayor of New Donk City and Mario's first damsel in distress is already playable in MK Tour! Her whole sultry singer thing would set her apart, and MK8 could REALLY use some Odyssey representation.

Hammer Bro - Another Tour driver! Yeah I know I said that the next mook should be Goomba, but have you considered the fact that I really like Hammer Bros??

Captain Toad - He's in Tour too! I don't know if he's different enough from Toad and Toadette to be worth it... but it'd be cool to see him. If we're getting a third Toad I think Toadsworth would be a lot more fun. Like Goomba, Toadsworth hasn't been playable in a previous Kart, but maaaayybe?

Nabbit - New Super Mario Bros. U's prankish bandit is also playable in Tour. Nabbit's popped up in plenty of spin-off titles since his debut, and who doesn't love a little klepto bunny? At the same time, I think the Koopa Kids have the "fun mischievous little shithead" archetype covered and then some.

King Bob-omb - The iconic first boss of Super Mario 64 made his driving debut in Tour. I would absolutely love to drive around as this big stupid idiot. Hilarious. He a orb with a mustache and a king hat. GIMME

SWEET BABY PRINCE KAMEK THEY DONE YOU SO DIRTY FOR LIKE 25 FUCKIN' YEARS - Bowser's wicked man-witch, advisor, babysitter and punching bag was ALMOST in Mario Kart 64. You can look up screenshots! He got dropped at the last second for Donkey Kong, which is totally fair, but then he didn't get another chance until Tour?! Tour IMO doesn't really count. It's just not as fun. My wishful thinking brain is gonna just hope that the Yoshi's Island track that was added is a hint that Kamek's on the way.

Chargin' Chuck - Another ridiculous Tour dude. Football Koopa! Fuck it, why not! His hamburger car kicks ass too. Look he's just more interesting than Paratroopa, okay?

And then it is fun to go full bluesky. If they want to add more guest characters, Kirby and Captain Falcon would both be perfect for wildly different reasons. Some Wario Ware representation would be insanely welcome, especially athletic disco-man Jimmy T. or the scooter-driving Mona. We could use some Luigi-love too! E. Gadd from the Luigi's Mansion games would make sense, but Kitsune Luigi from Super Mario 3D World would also be a delight! He'd fit right in with Tanooki Mario and Cat Peach!

Whoever ends up joining the race, I'm excited to see 'em! I love this friggin' game!