#giles feels like he is lost but what’s pulling him out of it is the desire to help jenny find herself!

[theajaheira]

been listening to crj’s “bad thing twice” and thinking very specifically about jenny in what you make

[specialagentlokitty]

Giles x Autistic!Student!reader - there for you

Hi Lokitty! I was just wondering if I could a parental relationship between Rupert Giles and an autistic teenager? Where they have a bad day and just feel overwhelmed so they come to the library and Giles comforts them. - @10-10-1824💜

What could have gone wrong today, did gone wrong, and sure, some days were like that, sometimes some days were worse than others, but today felt impossible.

You didn’t want to be at school, and you couldn’t exactly go home, so you started bombing off the rest of your class, only actually attending the first two before you gave up.

For the third one you spent it outside hiding from anybody looking for you, but as lunch came around you just couldn’t do it.

Pushing through the crowds of students, you barged into the library, making your way to the furthest stacks of books away from everybody.

Nobody came this far, and you didn’t know if you could handle being around people, or anything for a matter of fact.

So, you sat there in the corner, head in your knees, hands clutching at your hair.

Giles had heard the door being thrown open, and he came out of his office to look around trying to see if he could see anybody.

When he realised there was nobody else there he went back to his office, making some tea he set it on the table and walked through the shelves.

He went to the far back, and he crouched down, resting his arms on his knees.

“I’ve heard you’ve been having a rather tough day.” He said quietly.

Giles reached out, placing his hands on yours to move them away from your head.

“Now let’s not do that, remember we don’t want you to hurt yourself by accident.”

You wrapped your arms around yourself and he let out a gently sigh, placing his hand on your head, running it over your hair.

“What’s the matter (Y/N)? You’ve been having some rather good days recently.”

“I don’t want to be at school anymore…”

“I can’t say I blame you, I wouldn’t want to be at school either, however, unfortunately you must be here.”

Giles tapped your shoulder, and you looked up at him.

He offered you a warm smile and held out his hands for you.

“But I do happen to know you enjoy a nice cup of tea, and a quiet place to escape the daily horrors you call school. Does that sound nice?”

You nodded your head and put your hands in his so he could pull you back up to your feet.

You let go, settling for gripping the sleeve of his blazer instead, and he smiled softly at you, walking you back through the books.

Making your way to the stairs you walked down them and he pulled out the chair for you so could sit down and pick up your tea instead.

“Would you like to talk to me about what’s going on today?” Giles asked.

“I.. I forgot my lunch… then.. then I was late.. my teacher shouted at me… I lost a book… I tripped over and hurt my arm too…”

Giles got up, standing in front of you.

“Let me see.”

You held out your arm, letting him roll your sleeve up so he could have a look.

He could see some small bruising, and you pulled your arm slightly when he touched it.

He let go, and stood up, walking away before he came back with some ice for your arm.

“I don’t believe it is fractured, you will of course have some bruising, but hopefully with some ice there won’t be as much swelling.”

He placed it on your arm, and you held it there, pulling your arm back towards you.

“Well, by the sounds of it this certainly hasn’t been a good day for you by any means. I assume that’s why you have been reported missing from your classes?”

“I have..?”

He hummed, nodding his head.

“Oh yes, a few of your teachers have been in here looking for you, I assumed you would eventually come on your own when you were ready.”

You set the ice pack down, going back to drinking your tea.

“As for your missing book, I’m sure we can get you a new one if you’d like, I can see if I have a copy here, or we can go to the mall and find you a brand new one. Which would you like?”

“Can we get food while we’re there?”

“Of course, whatever you’d like. Will your mother not be home to cook for you tonight?”

“Double shift…”

Giles nodded his head in understanding.

From when he first became the librarian he knew about you, whispers from the teachers in the teachers lounge and on the first day you had come running into the library upset.

Since then he realised a lot, learned a lot about you, such as this was your comfort space, you knew all the corners to hide in and soon enough he did too.

Your mom had asked him to look after him when you were at school, and eventually he began to see you as his own.

He felt the need to make sure you had everything, books, food, warm enough jackets, make sure you were happy and comfort you when you were upset.

“I see, well, in such a case we can get something to eat as well as find your book in one of the stores. Is there anything else you need?”

You shook your head and Giles smiled softly.

You looked around the library, not really too focused on anything.

“(Y/N)?”

“Can I go home?”

Giles took the cups, taking them back through to his office and came back his his jacket, bag and keys.

“Of course, I’ll tell the principal that you’re not feeling well, then when we get you home I’ll call your mother and tell her what’s happened.”

You nodded, and you grabbed his jacket sleeve, following him through the school.

First Giles stopped at the office, he was in there for a while and you went outside to wait, pacing back and forth as you did and eventually Giles came out.

He offered his arm again and you took it.

Giles took you back to your apartment and you wondered away while he walked over to the phone to call your mother.

After a few minutes you came wondering back in, sitting on the couch as you watched him hang up the phone.

“Am I in trouble Giles?”

He walked over, sitting on the table in front of you.

“No. No, of course not (Y/N), she understands you had a hard day, and agreed the best thing for you to do was to come home. She’s said that I can take you to the mall if you’d like me too, and if you want I can stay until she comes home.”

“I would like that, I want you to stay. Wil you stay?”

Giles smiled warmly.

“Of course I will. Would you like to go to the mall now, or later?”

“Not right now. I want to make lunch, can I make lunch?”

“Absolutely, let’s go make you something for lunch.”

You went into the kitchen, going through the fridge and you pulled out some chocolate.

Giles took it from you, putting it back on the shelf.

“No, that’s not lunch. That’s a snack.”

“Please? Mom won’t know.”

“I’ll know, you need something proper, how about some pasta?”

You thought for a moment, going through the freezer now and you closed it.

“Can I have pancakes?”

“If you’d like, would you like to help me make them?”

You nodded and got up, washing your hands while he got everything you needed.

Giles rolled up his sleeves, and let you pick what you wanted to do, and you settled for making the mix while he cooked them.

“Will you have some?”

“I think I will, I’m feeling rather hungry too, I must have forgotten to eat lunch.”

You smiled and he smiled back, setting a plate at the table in the kitchen for you and you sat down while he put a pancake on the plate, going back to cook another.

“Remember it’ll be hot, would you like a drink?”

“Water.”

Giles got your drink and brought it over, then went back to cooking.

“What about Buffy, what if she needs your help? Will you go?”

“No, she can call here if she needs assistance with anything, right now I’ll stay here with you.”

You nodded and he eventually came over to eat as well, pouring some syrup on your pancakes for you.

You smiled brightly, happily digging into the food and he smiled as well.

“I’m glad you’re here.” You said.

“Thank you (Y/N), I’m glad you’re here as well.”

Giles was like a father to you, he would take care of you when you needed it, he would always put you first above anything else.

You were his top priority, he had to look after you, he wanted to look after you because you needed that, and he needed somebody to looked after, a reason for him to know to be careful in what he was doing, because he knew without a doubt, every morning when school was on you would be there, you would be waiting for him.

He had something, someone to protect, and that was the most important thing

[jakesullysdreads]

“I’m Sorry” Kent x fem!reader

Warnings: mention of death, fluff, angst?

Word count: 960

Requested: No

Edited: No

Content: Wednesday character Kent x fem!reader. Reader is a witch. Takes place during and after the Poe Cup

Summary: Reader is nervous for her mans and only wants him safe.

        Chewing on her lip, she shook her head. She was standing next to Kent on the dock by the lake waiting for the Nevermore student's canoes to pass by. The signal for Kent to enact Bianca’s sabotage plan.

        It’s not that she didn’t like the Poe Cup, she did. She just didn’t enjoy Kent ‘helping’ Bianca that way. It always made her nervous. The girl knew that her boyfriend could pull it off easily. The water is his element more so than those competing. But, it still didn’t ease her as she hoped.

        “I can feel you staring. Take a picture, it’ll last longer.” She spoke to the male siren.

        “You’re nervous,” he stated. 

        The girl opened her mouth to deny the accusation that came from his lips, but he beat her to it. 

        “Don’t try to deny it. You're chewing your lip. You only do that when you’re nervous,” the boy turned his body to face hers. “So, what is it?”

        She let out a shaky sigh. Her heart hammering in her chest she was sure he could hear it, even without the werewolf hearing that her fellow students had. The pressure in her chest felt like the stones used to press Giles Corey to death in the Salem Witch Trials. She felt as though if she had to endure the pressure and keep her feelings and thoughts about the plan to herself much longer, her tongue would stick out of her mouth much like poor Mr. Corey. 

        Kent might not be the brightest student at Nevermore, but he has a good heart. His intentions are always in the right place, even when it doesn’t seem like it. He always knows when something is wrong with her and at times, it drives her up a wall. But, she does love him and he loves her.

        “I don’t like the plan this year. Not with Wednesday competing with The Black Cats. We don’t know her and what tricks she may have up her sleeve. I don’t want you getting hurt.” She looked into his eyes.

        He smiled softly and leaned in to place a kiss on her temple. He rested his head on hers and whispered words of affirmation and promises of staying safe into her ear. Moments like these were their favorite, though neither one would ever admit it. Being alone, basking in the energy of one another. Whispers of sweet nothings and physical intimate affection they wouldn’t dare show around others. 

        They weren’t prudes, they were actually far from it. But they both felt that moments like these needed to be just them and not in front of the eyes of nosey peers. The couple would hold hands and be moderately physically affectionate when around others. Maybe a small kiss here and there but that was the limit.

        He pulled away from her and went to the end of the dock right as the canoes started to pass by. He hurriedly took his shirt off, looking back and blowing a kiss to the girl who looked as if she wanted to sink into the deck and become one with it before he dove into the lake.

---

        The girl ran from the quad at Nevermore, where she was awaiting her siren friends, to the lake. She waited for 30 minutes before Enid showed up, with Wednesday in reluctant tow, and told her that Kent had been hit in the face by Wednesday when he tried pushing their canoe into a buoy. She glared daggers at Wednesday, nostrils flared, before thanking Enid for letting her know why her friends weren’t there. She knew her glare wasn’t going to intimidate the raven-haired girl, but it made her feel a little better. 

        Upon coming to the dock, she saw Kent sitting with his legs over the edge. He was buttoning the shirt that was handed to him by his twin, Divina, who wore a sympathetic look on her face. Bianca stood there fuming over the fact they lost.

        “So let me get this straight,” the female siren started. “First you got trapped in a net shot at you by The Black Cats. Then as you’re pushing their canoe, a hand swims through the water and punches you in the face. And it wasn’t from anyone above the surface. It was just a hand?”

        “I know you think I’m crazy Bianca, but it’s true!” He defended himself.

        Divina lightly shook her head at Bianca, a signal that now isn’t the time, before her gaze landed on the girl at the other end of the dock. Her eyes widened before she started rapidly tapping Kent, catching his attention to turn around. 

        Kent felt his mouth go dry when he saw the person who his twin was freaking out over. He quickly jumped to his feet, rushing to the girl. 

        “It’s not as bad as it looks!” he hurriedly exclaimed, hoping his girlfriend wouldn’t get too upset over the red and purple-black eye he had acquired.

        “You promised you wouldn’t get hurt,” she whispered. 

        “I know! And I am so sorry! I had no idea it was coming,” he tried to soothe her. 

        He placed his hands on her cheeks, prepared to wipe the tears that were threatening to fall from her eyes. His heart broke with the knowledge that he was the cause of them.

        The girl didn’t say anything in response. She wrapped her arms around his torso, her head on his chest, and held him. Kent kissed the top of her head, holding her tighter against him. No words were spoken between the two. They didn’t need to be. Everything that needed to be said was spoken with the way they held one another.

                                                   “It’s okay.” 

                                                  “I’m sorry.”

                                                 “I love you.”

----

Let me know if you guys would like a part 2!

if it's rusty, not my fault, i haven't written in a long while

[winvyre]

[Valerie's Story] Chapter 1: Omie (5/6)

“What happened to him? He was fine earlier.” Something is very wrong. A part of me wants to run and tell the watchmen but another part of me feels drawn in. The way its energy flows and tangles makes me want to touch it. To dig into it, to feel it in my hands, to pick it apart and play with it until I understand what it is.

“Giles, are you okay?” Kell inches closer. The boy doesn't give any indication that he heard him. Kell's about to tap him on the shoulder but I yank him back. Don’t. My head is swimming with conflicting signals. Every time I try to speak my throat closes up. I'm sweating. I can't breathe. I'm trapped by the pressure of this new energy. It’s thrilling. Kell seems to understand. “Let's go back.” I don’t want to. You can’t handle it, but I can. This is magic and this magic is mine.

My hand reaches for the heart of the spell; my fingers break up the energy like a rock splits the river. The way this magic is structured is the opposite of Mom's. This one pushes out of the target like a hurricane whereas hers pulls in like sand falling through an hourglass. What would happen if I tried to reverse it?

I focus on the currents and will them to turn back on their source. A shockwave throws me back into Kell and we tumble several feet on the ground. Owwww…

“What was that?” Kell asks.

“I'm not sure.” I feel strangely whole. Like I've uncovered a lost part of myself. At the same time, the sensation emphasizes that more is missing. How have I never noticed it before?

Just as we're gaining our footing, a groan captures our attention. Giles’s head cracks with the force of his turn, going beyond human flexibility. White goo bubbles up and falls out of his mouth when it opens, garbling his cry as he charges faster than he should be able to. All the blood drains from my face and my chest constricts. Kell and I scream. We flee up a tree (guts guts guts guts guts guts guts), leaving the creature to claw at its base.

Watchmen come running from the village. They stop at the sight of Giles. His skin has gone from baby smooth with grey undertones to full-on rotting. His eyes glow white, his veins bulge and are pulsing visibly with the same duller light. His appearance grows less human by the second. What could have done this to him?

The watchmen are hesitant but swing at the creature once it shifts to attack them instead. It loses an arm and the same goo leaks from the wound but it doesn't stop. Kell and I watch as they chop Giles up. Do they even recognize him? There's no blood, just a glowing white substance.

A crowd has gathered at the edge of the woods. Some watchmen usher them back to the festival, some debate what to do with the creature's remains, and one stands below us promising the danger has passed and it's safe to come down. I lock eyes with Kell. We're thinking the same thing: the hoary.

-=+=-

“It's just like the stories!” Kell insists.

“You’re overreacting.” Fran keeps her eyes on her dolls’ hair, repeatedly trying and failing to achieve the five strand braid many women were wearing at the festival. It’s a style popular with teenagers right now. I think it looks like a loaf of bread on the back of your head.

“Then how would you explain what happened to Giles?”

“Kell, Francesca. Enough of your bickering. What happened to Giles was terrible but it's over now. The watchmen handled it.” Sometimes I can't tell if Mom actually believes what she's saying or if she only says it for our sakes. Kell sticks his tongue out at Fran's smug look before returning to our knucklebones game.

Bernadette has been staring silently at the unlit fireplace since we told her what happened. Periodically, her expression changes from fear to sorrow to some mixture of the two to almost happy. What is she thinking? It's weird to see her so… stirred.

“Mom! Kell took Urraca and Mabeline!”

“Goodness.” Mom sounds like she’s on the verge of tears. “Please, you two. Go sit on opposite sides of the room. And, Kell, give Francesca her dolls.”

“That means Isabeau, too, Kell! I know you have her!”

“Can’t do that. She hasn’t been saved yet.”

“Of course she’s in your stupid castle setup!” Fran starts marching towards the stairs.

Kell grabs her arm, “We’re besieging it tomorrow. You can have her back then.”

“She’s my doll, you coxcomb!”

“You’re adopted!”

“We’re all adopted!”

Bernadette stands up and snatches Urraca and Mabeline from Kell. “Enough! Both of you, go to your rooms immediately.” She hands the dolls to Fran. My siblings hang their heads as they shove each other to get to the stairway first. Bernadette is scary when she gets angry.

Once they’re gone, Bernadette exhales like she’d been holding her breath. “Oakley, Valerie, it is time I told you the truth.”

-----

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6

[enigmatist17]

Part 1

Part 2

-----

He doesn't know where he is at first, not that it really matters.

Doesn't it?

The room he's in is aged, and with a deep inhale, he can smell the scent of a dozen different magic's melded in the bones of the building. There's a comfort to it, in a way, Spike has always enjoyed older buildings to newer ones that have yet to take on life, take on an identity, and he burrows underneath the blankets with a tired sigh.

The scent is familiar, and he can't help but rub his cheek against the soft bedding with a deep purr, something he hasn't done willingly in a long while. For how long he's not sure, but eventually, Spike rises to the forefront with information that makes him still.

It smells like Angel.

"No, no no no it can't." The blonde curls up as small as he can manage, hugging his legs with a slight whine. "No angel's here, there can be no Angel, unworthy of wings, of life, of care."

"You're not unworthy." He hadn't felt the bed dip, but the large hand that rested on the top of his head was achingly familiar.

"You didn't kill us, me, us."

"No."

"Bad, very bad."

"No, just able to see what you can't right now." Spike hisses, Angel beginning to move his hand through Spike's curls that had grown over the last few weeks, keeping his motion steady. The other begins to mutter as he lets Angel touch him, and as the older expected, he finally relaxes against him.

"It burns..." It's a weak whisper, but he knows Angel can hear it all the same.

"I know." Spike sighs, finally opening his eyes and looking up at Angel with a slight frown. "What?"

"...I don't like your hair." Angel rolls his eyes, keeping Spike's lack of blonde to himself for now.

"Glad to see you haven't lost your edge." The smaller man gives him a glare as Angel pulls away, watching Spike slowly sit up with a wince as he scans the room. "How's the head?"

"Beatin' like you've punched me." He grumbled, slowly drawing his legs close to his chest again. "Did you punch me?"

"No, though you did bang your head when crawling through a window."

"I crawled through a window?"

"Mhm, into my old apartment. Good thing I found you when I did, you could have gotten burnt or worse."

"Oh." Spike looks down at his covered feet, already feeling what little sanity he had slipping from his fingers like sand through an hourglass. "I'm in L.A?"

"Yes." Angel wants to ask how Spike made it back from halfway around the world, but settles for slipping off the bed to gathering clothes he'd bought for Spike. "Think you can shower?"

"Shower..." The word almost seemed confusing, blue eyes flickering around before centering back on Angel. "Where?"

"Other side of the room, green door." Spike looks around the room before zeroing in on said door, muttering something about ducks before slowly shuffling off the bed and onto his feet, wavering in place as his head spun.

Man, he was thirsty.

Angel watches the Brit pad across the room and vanish into the bathroom before shaking his head, gathering up dirty sheets and tossing them down the chute to be washed. Fresh blood is pulled from the fridge and set to be warmed, and after putting fresh sheets on the bed, he heads downstairs to gather some files to look over. Of course, his crew has questions, but Wesley is his silent hand as he shoos everyone away and back to their work.

"Thanks, and sorry for making you guys have extra work on your plate." Angel rubbed the back of his neck as Wesley handed him the stack of files he was searching for.

"I think it's rather understandable." The former Watcher said little as Angel pulled out a small jar, and some cigars a client had given him a while back.

"It took me a while to get my head back on straight, I don't know how Spike will take it... but he'll come back to himself." Angel paused, staring at the small jar with a frown. "Could you call Giles? I have an idea why he...but I need to know."

"Consider it done, I'll drop by later." Angel reached over and squeezed Wesley's shoulder before he was gone back up the stairs, leaving everyone to look at each other in curiosity.

The water has stopped by the time Angel returns, and a quick scan of the room reveals the other was clearly still inside, the vampire setting down his spoils before going to knock on the door. "Spike?"

"Come back later, he's not here." The voice is soft, softer than he's heard in so long, and Angel sheds his coat before rolling up his sleeves.

"With whom do I have an audience?"

"The man whose name you've said before, with a pretty smile and eyes darker than night." Slowly, Angel opens the door, taking in the warm steam for a blessed moment that envelops him before he quickly enters the room, closing the door behind him. Spike is curled against one side of the bathtub, blue eyes flickering up from their fixation on the bubbles that covered the surface of the warm water.

"I see you found the bubble bath."

"It reminds me of that field we passed in Dublin. Do you remember how the moon shone as we danced until dawn?" Those eyes watch as Angel crouches down by the side of the tub, one hand scooping up soapy water and running it through his hair.

"I know you wrote a poem about it, hid it in my trunk under the lid where you thought I'd never know." Blue eyes flicker closed as the water continues to be poured through his hair, chasing away the dirt and grime from months of traveling in a half-dazed state.

"Did you like it?" William opens his eyes, stealing whatever stale air that sat in Angel's lungs as he stared. "I don't fear the whip."

"There is no whip," He coos, taking a moment to remember another time. "An' I did like it."

"I remember that voice, such a strong one." Those impossible eyes take on a shine at the old Irish tone he hadn't heard in ages.

"Sit forward, I need to finish cleanin' ye." William does as he's told, and neither speak as Angel makes sure he's cleaned up before pulling the stopper and standing to hand the other a towel. "I'll be outside."

"Ta." Angel quickly slips out, running a hand over his face with a sigh. It helps to know that, at the very least, Spike isn't roaming the streets any longer in his current state, something he remembers had nearly ended in his death more than once. The smaller man eventually exits the bathroom, surprised to see a mug filled with blood awaiting him on the beside table.

"If ya need any more, just ask." Spike nodded before grabbing the mug, greedily drinking the contents as he sat on the bed. It had felt like an eternity since he'd last fed, flickers of rats and other animals being drained crossing his minds eye before he's back to the present. The now drained cup is set back on the table, and Spike lays on the fresh sheets with a sigh, head thankfully no longer spinning. "Feeling any better?"

"Suppose so. Also, when did you get the accent back?" He watches as Angel winces, a bit amused as he clears his throat.

"You liked it a minute ago."

"...oh." He can feel Angel sit behind him, and only the rifling of papers breaking the silence as the city moves on outside. "Angel?"

"Yes?" The rustling stops as Spike is given the others full attention.

"Will I ever be sane again?"

"Yes." It's a simple answer, and Spike pauses for whatever Angel is going to continue with. "The screams will stop, and the memories ease, never truly gone, but not in control."

"Well I'm not goin' to be a broody little ponce." The snort from his grandsire is surprising, and a turn of his head shows Angel is more than amused. "M not."

"Spike, the world will fall to ashes the moment you stop speaking your mind. Or causing chaos. Or irritating the ever living hell out of me and everyone within a twenty mile radius. If you turn "broody," I'd have to do something drastic."

"Oh, I'm so scared." Nestling into his pillow, Spike settled so he's facing the investigator. "Who're you lookin' at?"

"A client is convinced that their neighbors are drug dealers, I think it's just some demons who aren't really hiding themselves." He hummed, beginning to drone on about the mundane facts they'd gathered before Spike had arrived to town. He's asleep by the time Angel finishes the first page, shuffling closer to the older vampire until Angel begins to run one hand through washed curly hair in a slow but gentle pattern.

Neither of them are sure how long this would last, but for now, it was enough.

[chasingfictions]

hi i feel like forever is about a lot of things and is also about the limits and constraints and shortcomings and yearnings of the nuclear family structure.....

- like the togetherness of the scoobies as this found family unit, the early scenes especially, everyone having family dinner together, helping with the funeral arrangements

- how that same scene has buffy and dawn reacting to the fact that their father hasn't even called... these two little girls abandoned by their only parent left, that they aren't orphans and yet they are

- how willow: "I'm stopping by my mom's first. Been doing that a lot." // xander: "Yeah. I thought maybe I'd stop by your mom's too. ... Well, I'm not going to my house. Those people are scary"

- how buffy ostensibly has all these people and all this help but she still has to step into this role as dawn's parent when she's just a child who lost her mother too, and she's not ready, and the other scoobies, and also giles, are willing to be there for her especially around the extraordinary time of the burial but the nuclear family as a structure still reigns supreme... how it's these two little girls in this big empty house

- how that's part of dawn not wanting to go back to the house after the burial. how before the burial there were all these people around and then it'll literally just be the two of them, and the quiet

- how this shot REALLY gets to me. that there is found family and there are chosen family structures and also there's not. and also there's just being alone. standing vigil at the graveside of your mother.

- how dawn this whole episode is seeking out family. how spike is seeking it too, how he's processing subconsciously his own loss of his mother through dawn. how the mourning of the nuclear family leads them to find each other in a new form of family

- how it's still not enough. how at the end of the day buffy is still 20 years old and has to become a parent and is all alone. how we don't even see what she does during the second day of the episode. she's just off to her own devices, alone

- how this. this whole thing. buffy devolves, becoming smaller and more childlike

- how buffy and dawn don't have anyone to take care of them. how dawn wants buffy to take care of her and buffy wants to be able to take care of dawn and she can't. how in the end they have to take care of each other. just two little girls, breaking down in each others arms.

- how literally :))) it didn't have to be this way :))) because if giles had his shit together he literally would have moved in :))))))) how he sits at that dining table and they all talk about how their literal father has abandoned them in the wake of their mother's death.... how the scoobies are found family but the scoobies also live in the same society we do, that says the nuclear family is still more real, more valid. how the scoobies can offer support but cant bring it past that.

- how ive always thought the giles listening to the record from band candy was oddly placed in the episode, that it should have been right after the funeral. but actually, i think it makes more sense. because we do get giles earlier in the episode, helping with dinner, with funeral arrangements, picking dawn up from willow's dorm, watching her at the magic box and giving her things to do. but the shot we end with? are left with? is him alone. and that in itself isn't bad, like, he needs time to grieve on his own terms. but it's the way structurally, that shot is placed in between other characters with people. dawn with spike. willow with tara. how it's this staccato scene that almost feels like a blip, that doesn't fit in the rhythms. how giles can't pull into the father role that he is literally, in my opinion, obliged to. because he has so much watchers council repression and reserve baked into him. so much pull-yourself-by-your-bootstraps baggage. how it terrifies him to truly admit he is embroiled in this group of people, because that would mean being a father, and he has never known the concept of fatherhood to truly represent something good .... so he pulls back.

- how the nuclear family becomes a trap and a haunting and an excuse and a holy grail aspiration and becomes two little girls sobbing, holding each other in the doorway of their big empty house, breaking down

[prose-for-hire]

Bad to the bone

Part One

Pairing: Spike x Giles!reader

Request: Not really requested. Inspired and suggested by the 🏜 Anon !! This is a second part to ‘Bad boy, lunchable reader’ 

Warning: Bit of a rocky relationship with Dad!Giles, mention of reader feeling a kind of abandonment by him.

A/N: I’m not sure how similar reader is to the original fic (can a reader be ooc lol). I just wanted to show the softer side of their relationship despite the people around them being more hostile. It was really nice re-visting this one !! 

You ran, waiting on the kerb rather than in the house. You knew your dad wouldn’t follow you out. Not after that argument. You tried to just ignore what had been said, as if it had never happened.

You waited for the sun to set, knowing he would come for you as soon as he physically could. Your vampire. Ever since he had told you he loved you, you had been completely loved up. And everyone around you appeared to be against you both for it.

Despite it all, you couldn’t help your heart soaring when you saw him approaching on the motorbike that had suddenly come into his possession.

He grinned when he saw you, dismounting the bike as you walked towards him. He pulled you into a deep kiss. It knocked the breath from your body, his tongue meeting yours with a fierce passion. He always did this as soon as he saw you, just couldn’t resist it. Could never resist you.

He gestured for you to join him and you happily started to sit behind him but he paused you, brandishing something you hadn’t noticed what with his distracting kiss.

“On. Not bloody moving ‘til it’s on” He warned, coaxing the helmet into your arms and stared, waiting. When you didn’t put it on he spoke again, “Come on, stole it special didn’t I?” He encouraged softly. It made you smile when his tone softened that way. He only did it for you. You had always known his heart was softer than it appeared.

“Hey! You don’t even wear one, you’re treating me like a baby”

“Humans have skin. Soft, squishy parts. And you got the softest of all, pet” He said tenderly, moving his hand to rest against your upper arm ,as if in appreciation of said skin, “Can’t have you in harm’s way”

“Fine, but only if I can drive on the way back” You warned, putting the helmet on your head.

“Love-”

“If we crash you can do the hero thing, y’know, save me all vampire-style and kissing me”

“Yeah while all your bones are crushed beyond recognition”

“You… you wouldn’t kiss me if I was smushed into the floor?” You pouted, which made him tense his jaw. He loved you, God he loved you, but you didn’t half ask some stupid questions sometimes. You were so soft and unassuming though, you really wanted to hear the answer. He was a sucker for you.

“’Course I would”

“You mean it? You’re not just saying it?!” You laughed, looping your arms around him still stood beside the bike and pressing yourself into him. Almost hitting him with the extra padding around your head. You closed your eyes, so relieved that he was here.

“Just… come on, pet” He gestured behind him, trying to peel your arms from him. You just smiled a little giddily because you were in his presence and tried to press more kisses to his face through the visor. He looked around, making sure Giles or the Slayer wasn’t around. You weren’t listening so his tone changed a little harder, “Get on the bike or I’ll drive away into the sunset”

“Yeah, dust in the wind” You muttered with a pout but moved to sit behind him. He caught it but didn’t say anything.

You were clinging to him, his waist. He loved having you this way, driving you through the streets. Allowing everyone to get a good look that you were his. You leaned against his shoulder, the tension releasing from your shoulders the further you drove away.

You arrived at his crypt, a place you loved. It was a solace. You were able to love freely here. Without anyone’s unwanted opinions or fists getting in the way.

Nobody accepted your relationship and your dad was the worst. You had argued with him again. Just before Spike came to pick you up. It was becoming almost every day now. You wished you could share how much you adored Spike. How happy you were. How he took you to the library and sat there the entire time you were studying. How he offered such loving comfort. How he was there for you without question, without agenda. He was yours.

This is how you had ended up exchanging more infuriating words with your father.

“Look at him, Y/n, for pete’s sake! He’s bad to the bones of him!” He seethed as you tried to mention casually that you were staying over at Spike’s. You didn’t ask permission seeing as you had lived alone for most of your life until you had moved back in with him again.

“Dad, please, just believe me – I love-” You began, trying in earnest to get him to understand.

“You don’t know the bloody meaning of the world, child!”

“I’m an adult, Dad, I’m not your kid anymore!”

“No, I suppose you’re just some stranger I allow to live here rent free”

“I can leave”

“Then you should do so, as quickly as you can” He had said it in the heat of the moment and instantly regretted it. He was driving you further into Spike’s arms and he only comprehended this as his last syllable pierced the air towards you. Leaving you wounded, fleeing the scene.

Spike took your hand softly in his, guiding you through the grave stones and into the crypt he called home. Nobody would ever believe you if you told them how soft his heart was. All they saw was the big, bad vampire that had crashed into Sunnydale.

But he was good, no matter his faults. He was so good to you. He could get violent, you had seen the evidence from the fights he got into. But he would never let you see that. Wanted to protect you, make sure you were always safe.

He had been so close to trying to hurt your Dad recently. Giles had threatened him away from you. Shoving him hard into the wall upon realising he couldn’t fight back. Spike stood and took it. No matter how angry he got. He would have risked the headache if it hadn’t been for you. His way of proving he wasn’t backing away. He wasn’t going to lose you.

Spike hadn’t told you though, didn’t want to see you cry again. He hated to see you cry. Didn’t want to be the reason you were upset. He’d hide it from you, not wanting you to fall out with your Dad again. He knew how much his approval mattered to you.

It soon became apparent, however, that you were already slightly down. He didn’t press you to talk to him, just pulled you into his side. You had settled on the sofa in his crypt. He had cleaned up again, always swept around the crypt and tried to make it look habitable when you were coming over.

Wanted the best for you. Always.

You leant into his chest, not able to hide your frown now. What your Dad had said was finally sinking in. You didn’t know whether to ask Spike if you could stay here. Or whether this would only make things worse.

But this worry began to dissipate with every loving second you shared with him. You loved his jewellery. He often wore a single silver chain around his neck. You twisted your finger to look his necklace. Thinking, brow furrowing lightly now as you did.

He kissed you softly on the forehead before casting his eye back to the tv as he spoke, “Your old man again?” he questioned, knowing your moods as if they were his own. You just nodded, hiding your face. Nestling into the side of his neck.

He wrapped his arms around you protectively. As if he sought to save you from the world outside the crypt.

This is the man that was entirely bad to the bone. The vampire. A killer. But one who would never harm you, hated even a word said against you. Who would defend you even past his last breath. Who would whisper such tender love. Such sweet affirmations. His poet’s heart sung for you. You had found him writing feverishly. About you. For you.

You couldn’t describe it properly, but with him you felt safe. Safer than you ever had before. Despite everything you knew. He had told you his past in excruciating detail. But you still confirmed your love after. Because of the way he was with you. The way he cared. You knew something had shifted within.

He put something on the television as he pressed such tender kisses against your skin, trying to get you back to face him. God, he loved your face. He pressed his lips along your jaw, small kisses making a path of his love.

“Let me make you feel better, love?” He posed the question innocently but his eyebrow was telling you different. He loved to kiss the pain away. he was a big believer in healing through this kind of affection. He always wished to make you feel his love so intimately. He was the typical bad boy but you loved the bones of him.

Spike latched onto your neck, soothing kisses. Hands slowly roaming. He cherished every inch of you, sliding you onto his lap as he pressed further kisses against your skin. Your lips.

Wanted you to know that he was with you. But you never doubted this. His love always surrounded you. Like a quilt. An aura.

Suddenly this soft moment was shattered. This peaceful moment you held in reverence lost. Buffy had dropped in. Again.

“Get off them! Now!” She barked, an obvious disgust written all over her face. It made you both so uncomfortable. You loved so deeply and yet nobody could see through the attitude. The past he wasn’t ashamed of sharing with you despite always worrying about your reaction. You knew it all now and loved him more for it.

You didn’t understand how everyone else hated him so.

“Buffy, what the fuck!?” You muttered, she always brought this reaction from you now. You sprung from Spike who just moved his head a fraction to lazily glare at the slayer.

“Get up, Spike” She scowled at him.

“You can’t just come by unannounced and start slaying! It-it’s like Spike just coming to your house and starting to bite people at random!” You complained.

“He has done that…” Buffy said, crossing her arms over her chest, “Twice”

“Oh… right” Your brow furrowed a little, you were still getting used to the vampire thing.

“’S’alright pet, only a nibble. Like when I-” He arched a suggestive eyebrow as a heat ran up your face.

“Do not finish that sentence” Buffy warned before turning to plead to you, “Y/n, you know he’s no good. You know what he is. You don’t have to do this, to disrespect yourself this way”

“Buffy, I love him… he’s my boyfriend”

“Apart from the boy part, oh and the friendly part!” She rolled her eyes, “Come on” she grabbed your wrist and started to pull you away with her.

“Buffy, we’re not friends! You didn’t care to even know me until you found out that I was with Spike. This isn’t about me, it’s about… how you feel”

“No. it’s about you breaking Giles’ heart. Have you seen him lately?” She prodded, her tone turning harsh. She had tried to be understanding, played the concerned friend but she had given up.

She couldn’t understand liking Spike without hating yourself for it. Without treating affection as a transaction. He’s a demon. He had done horrible things and appeared to her to have no redeeming qualities. Apart from, admittedly, the fact that he was kind of attractive. Only in the right lighting, obviously.

“Yeah, I saw him thirty minutes ago when he threw me out of his house” You replied firmly. Your softness gone as she had made your life her business. Again. Buffy was so shocked she dropped your wrist.

Spike instantly got to his feet and moved swiftly to your side. His hand on you, he knew what this meant. He knew this would hurt you so much. You had felt distant with Giles for a long time, he moved away to basically raise some other kid. And left you behind. And now this was happening all over again.

You felt abandoned. Like he had created an entirely new family right here. Not made of blood but with the young people he helped all of the time. It was a secret he had kept from you and they had all been in on it. How could your own father make you feel like you were an outsider in your own home?

Spike’s hand was soothing on the small of your back. His eyes only on you. Sensitive to every minute inflection of emotion on your face. His expression held such understanding. Buffy looked between you, faltering only slightly before righting her face. He really did appear to love you. On the surface at least. His eyes didn’t move from you, his eyes glassy as he felt your emotions almost as strongly as you did.

He couldn’t help that swell of hope that you would move in with him though. No matter how concerned he was for you and your troubles, he was overjoyed that you might want to stay with him. To have you, by his side even in the day. To be close to you. Domesticity that he pretended he didn’t crave when you were around.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t realise…” Buffy offered. It was sincere. Of all the things she knew about Giles, she hadn’t expected him to parent like this. It was harsh, much harsher than he was on her even. She appeared to soften, want to offer a hand of friendship.

But Spike was already ushering her out of the door without her so much as collecting up her thoughts before she left. He hurled some choice insults out of the door with her before slamming the door shut.

He immediately moved to your side. Closing the space between you and allowing you to lean against him. He cradled your head whispering hushed assurances. That he would never leave you. That he would always look out for you even if everyone else turned from you. Which was exactly what it had felt like.

He knew this, knew your own thoughts as if they were his own. He didn’t like to admit it, although it was evident to you in abundance, but he was so soft for you. Especially when you were alone this way and you needed him. He was so comforting the gentle nature he shared with you almost made you cry. He continued to reassure you and held you to him through the night.

He wasn’t able to bite back any comments he had on your Dad, ones he had held inside for a while. He had never really liked that man.

Spike, this man who was so bad to the bone was your only comfort. All he wanted was for you to be happy, no matter what. He was soft with you where nobody else had been. He lifted you up, helped you carry on. He was yours.

You did move in with him after this, spending time together. It only made your relationship stronger.

You would make up with your Dad eventually. At your college graduation. He felt guilty, you had very rarely spoken to him since he told you to leave. He was protective, despite you having spent a large portion of your life looking after yourself.

He would never approve of your relationship with Spike fully, despite his assurance that he would never stop loving you because of it. He apologised though for his behaviour, something you hadn’t recalled him saying to you often. And something else.

“I’m proud of you, Y/n” He said, a hand patted yours. Your gasp audible. He had never said that to you before. It had honestly been all you had wanted to hear from him.

You still returned home to Spike though. You wouldn’t want to be anywhere else. He wished so badly he could have been there but it was the middle of the day. He showed you just how pleased he was for you either way when you returned. He was so supportive, even if you hadn’t made up with your father, Spike was all that you needed.

It wasn’t a fleeting love, you were his. For life.

[killian-spey]

Death Would be Kinder [ch.1]

[Drusilla/Spike/Calendar!Reader]

Words: 2626

Fic Concept: Jenny Calendar’s sister spends some “quality time” with the Season 2 Vampire Squad. [Ch.1 takes place in BtVS S2 Ep14]

TW/CW: Kidnapping, Violence, Nightmares.

AN: Check out the [Prologue] first if you haven’t already! :D

Tags: @prose-for-hire , (Comment below or send an ask to be added!)

You had run through the sewers for hours before you pulled yourself out of a manhole halfway across town. Escaping from the factory had worn you out completely, and you made your way home, hoping that Angel and Buffy had done the same.

When you got home, Jenny was asleep on the couch. It looked as though she'd been waiting up all night for you. You tucked a blanket over her and took her empty tea mug to the kitchen before going upstairs, where you flopped into bed and immediately found sleep.

You opened your eyes in the dark and two stormy grey eyes were staring into yours. You sat up confused as your eyes adjusted to the dark. A moment passed, then a new pair blinked into existence; they were blue, cold and unmoving. Their faces grew recognizable and a pit of anxiety grew in your stomach. Spike was leaning against your window sill. Drusilla was laying on your bed, reaching for you with one hand. You stumbled backwards with a yelp, falling onto your floor. Yellow eyes flashed once in your peripheral and then everyone was gone, just as quickly as they'd all appeared.

As you stood up, you found yourself in the factory. It was brighter here, but cold and empty. You spun, looking for an exit. Flashes of images knocked you off balance like punches. A red dress, flowing ribbon, blonde hair, black hair, crooked smiles, pointed teeth. Bells rang in your head, you saw a wheelchair, then painted red nails, then a ridged face. Your head was spinning. You were spinning. Faster and faster until you felt nauseous.

It stopped suddenly. A single thought pierced your adrenaline-rushing head. Soon-

You opened your eyes with a gasp, staring at the ceiling of your bedroom. It was morning and your alarm was going off. You stayed there a few minutes, snoozing the alarm so you could let your heart catch up with reality -or rather slow down to reality- before you got ready for the day and hopped in the car with your sister. Seems Buffy wasn’t the only one having bad dreams about vampires that should've been dead. Lucky you...

As it turns out, Buffy and Angel didn’t check in after last night’s screw up at the factory; thankfully Buffy came into school a couple minutes later to confirm she was still alive. The same couldn’t be said for Angel though, so tensions were high among the Scoobies while researching the Judge.

You were asked to use your artistic skills to draw the Judge to the best of your memory while the others looked into tomes with written references. The world tended to pass you by when you were drawing, so you almost didn’t notice when your sister left the library. She had been summoned by your Uncle, but for what you didn’t know. Not long after, the lights went out.

You stalked out of the library, seeing Xander, Willow, and Angel in the lobby of the school just down the hall. Willow was making her way towards Angel when-

“Willow, get away from him.” Jenny came from the left, holding up a cross as she stepped towards Angel. Oh. Oh no. You pulled a stake from your belt and called out to Willow as calmly as you could muster.

“Willow, walk back towards me.”

“What are you two talking about? It’s just A-”

Angel lunged forward and grabbed Willow by the neck. Familiar yellow eyes peered out of the darkness of the hallway as Willow yelped, struggling against the choke hold.

“You’re not Angel anymore, are you?” Jenny walked closer to Angel.

“Wrong. I am Angel, at last.” He pulled Willow back away from Jenny, “I’ve got a message for Buffy.”

“Why don’t you give it to me yourself?”

The two of them exchanged words and fought, allowing Willow the opportunity to escape Angel’s clutches and join your huddled group on the outskirts of the fight. Buffy got shoved into the water fountain, dumbfounded as Angel walked out the door laughing. The fight was over as quickly as it started, and a blanket of stunned silence covered the whole group. After what felt like an eternity of numb, unmoving shock, you and Jenny gave each other a knowing look. You’d failed. Angel was gone.

You don’t remember how long you’d been sitting in the library, vaguely listening to the group tell Giles about the confrontation with Angelus. Jenny was trying to keep Giles from panicking, and you sat numbly with your guilt. You only looked up when Buffy fled the room, Giles calling after her. You wanted so badly to apologize, but if Buffy ever found out what you’d known, she might kill you herself. You excused yourself from the library, mumbling to Jenny that you’d be in the studio back home.

-----

The garage door creaked as you lifted it. Jenny had given you one of the car bays to use as an art studio while you lived in Sunnydale. Your studio was one of the only places you knew where you could truly be alone with yourself. Jenny had never judged you or your art. Ever since your parents died, she’d stepped up and been supportive of you. You brushed your hand along the top of your canvas stash, picking a large, almost square canvas and setting it on your easel.

Painting had been a way for you to cope with strong emotions for as long as you could remember, but with the events of today you felt lost. You sat on your stool in front of that blank white canvas for what must have been hours. You eventually decided that nothing could convey what you were feeling in the moment, so you decided to paint something the opposite.

You used cream-white, gold and rust to block out a background; it was light, idyllic, and serene. It would be a white-stone conservatory, full of hanging candles and lanterns with a mezzanine balcony covered in ivy. Over that you dropped bright, vibrant tones of yellows and reds and greens. You blocked them into the spaces you would put dancers in flowing gowns and painted blues where you would place their partners. It would be full of life. You stood back a moment, studying. The scene was missing something; joy and innocence, maybe. You place a few, short splotches of pinks and light yellows for younger girls. They were running in a small stampede, weaving through the forest of colorful silks on the dance floor- chasing after fairies or some magic that existed only in their imaginations. There it was. You had vague shapes and a vision, and you were intent on chasing it.

You painted all through the night, and well into the morning. Jenny had left for the school hours ago, but hadn’t said anything. The painting was finally done. You sat in your stool and wiped your hands on your jeans. It was done, you had worked for hours, you had cried for Angel, you had smiled for the imaginary children, and for a moment you were satisfied... Then you noticed it.

In the center of your painting was a lone dancer. She wore a red gown with dark lace over the bodice and had equally dark hair. Your painting was somewhat post-impressionist, preferring interesting shapes over pinpoint detail, but it was unmistakable. In a ballroom of strangers, you’d painted her. Drusilla. You didn’t know what to think about that.

You stared at Drusilla in the painting, stuck in an introspective daze until a creaking sound pulled you back to reality. Your uncle had opened the garage door and stepped into the studio bay with two cups of coffee. You pulled up a stool for him and he handed you one, sitting beside you in front of the painting.

“Janna called,” he began cautiously. “She is on her way home with your friend, Buffy. I don’t know how, but she knows.”

“She’s going to hate me for this,” You scanned the sweeping lines of a yellow skirt somewhere else on your painting, trying not to let the tears prickle at the corners of your eyes.

The door to the garage opened behind you both and you looked down into your mug, anxiously tapping your nail against the ceramic. You couldn’t bear to look Buffy in the eyes, your guilt returning in full force.

Your uncle lit a pipe and stood up as he spoke,

“She told me you would be coming. I suppose you want answers,”

“Not really.” The voice wasn’t Buffy’s.

You snapped your head towards the door to find Angelus leaning against the door frame, blocking your exit. You scrambled, picking up a fistful of wooden paint brushes off your work table in a desperate search for weapons. You spun back towards Angelus just in time to watch him snap your uncle’s neck. An arm smacked against your leg as he dropped onto the concrete floor- a sensation you would no doubt remember the rest of your life. You snapped a large paintbrush in half to give it a pointier edge, but Angelus grabbed your wrist before you could even make a move on him. This was the sickening moment you realized just exactly how tall Angelus was. Exactly how far above he loomed over you.

“Ah, ah.” He tutted at you with a smirk. “Wouldn’t want to go angering the guy who holds your life in his hands, now would you?” He twisted your wrist until you let go of the brush, then wrapped his other hand around your throat and pushed you onto the worktable.

“You know, it really is embarrassing that you’re so darn fragile!”

He was laughing, but he was right. In comparison you were a mouse fighting a lion, you had no chance against him. You clawed fruitlessly at his hand, but he just squeezed harder. Your vision was already fuzzing out, and it was getting difficult to even see Angelus’ face clearly as he taunted you.

“Oh, stop squirming, you’ll be unconscious in a minute, kid. Lucky for you, I need some bait. So you get to live for a while, isn’t that exciting?!” His voice was giving you something tangible to focus on, but it was no use. Another moment and you were unconscious.

-----

Your head pounded like a drum when you woke up. You opened your eyes, but it took a while for them to adjust to the dim light. You tried to rub your eyes, but your hands were tied down to the armrests of the chair you were sat in. Your eyes darted around for any sign of Angelus, but found none. Everything was empty. Silent. Against your better judgement, you called out into the empty factory.

“Hello?”

You waited. No one responded, but you felt you were being watched.

You didn’t know how much time had passed before you heard a small, soft melody coming from behind you. Humming. Your heartbeat kicked up a notch as you scanned the room.

“I can hear you going pitter-patter from here,” Drusilla had spoken from a place you couldn’t see. You heard each of her footsteps click closer and closer behind you until you could feel her standing just inches away. You let out a shaky breath and she shushed you quietly.

She ran her hands through your hair, dragging long red fingernails across your scalp. She began detangling your hair with her fingers, idly humming once again. You let your head tip back as she picked lightly at a particularly bad snag, dismantling it and continuing her exploration of your hair. By now you’d noticed you were crying, silently terrified and unnerved by the ministrations of the vampire behind you. She yanked a new snag in your hair and you couldn’t help the small yelp that escaped you.

“Is the doll hurting?” She pulled her hands away when she realized you weren’t going to answer her. She walked agonizingly slowly around your chair, stopping directly in front of you. “It’s rude to ignore people.” You stared at the floor, avoiding her gaze. You did notice, however horrified, that she was wearing a new, yet familiar, red dress with black lace.

You could feel her staring down at you, almost willing you to look at her. When you didn’t, she dropped to her knees to meet your eye line, resting her cheek on your knee. You studied her face as she ghosted her hand up and down your left thigh, occasionally picking at the smatterings of paint that were still all over your jeans.

“You’re an artist. I like artists,” She picked up her head and you chuckled nervously as she looked at you. In a morbid way, you were glad she liked you, whatever that meant. It might mean I live a little longer.

You looked up at the ceiling uncomfortably, then scanned the room for an escape, for something, anything you could do. She dragged her finger from your thigh up to your neck as she looked up at you. For a moment, you were scared she’d slice your throat, but she wrapped her hand around your jaw and pulled your face down gently to look at her.

“You’ll be my little pet Artist. We’ll have lots of fun together,” She stared into your eyes with a dangerous smile. She rubbed her thumb against your jawline -her hand still holding your face as she stood up- until she burst into a fit of giggles. She dropped your face and pulled her hands together, close to her chest, as she walked backwards a few paces.

As if she’d sensed him coming, Spike rolled into the room and stopped his chair just next to you. Drusilla gracefully perched herself on Spike’s lap and after a few minutes of flirting, Angelus came down the spiral staircase with the Judge, who voiced that he was ready to leave.

“About time.” Spike gave Drusilla a kiss and told her to have fun.

“Too bad you can’t come with, huh?” Angelus was taunting Spike and -despite your fear- you were studying the interactions for a better understanding of the relationships at play. Spike was staying behind under the pretense of watching you, but it was a thinly veiled jab at his current handicap. You watched silently as Angelus practically stole Drusilla off Spike’s lap before they left the factory. Spike stared at the doorway they'd left from for a while before he glanced back at you, staring at him. You dropped your eyes immediately, but it was too late.

“What are you lookin’ at?” He wheeled himself to the other side of the table.

“I won’t be in this chair forever. I’ll get back at him.”

“Of course you will.”

He squinted at you, probably just as surprised as you that’d you’d actually spoken back at him. He turned his chair and got up close to you again, murder glinting behind his eyes.

“Are you being funny? ‘Cause I could kill you in half a second, you know.”

“No, no jokes,” You shook your head at him, weakly lifting your hands within your restraints in surrender. The last thing you wanted was for him to prove just how tough he still is.

“Good, cause I would,” he pointed his finger at you as he continued on, “...kill you, I mean.”

“Right.” You squinted, processing.

“You’d do well to remember that.”

You pressed your lips together and nodded awkwardly. He stared at you about 7 seconds longer than he needed to before huffing and rolling off to another room. As soon as you were alone, you sighed in relief and stared up at the ceiling; only one thought in your mind.

Oh. My. God.

[inkandpen22]

Shared Minds and Shared Souls (11/?)

Pairing: Spike x Female!Reader

Warnings: none

Word Count: 1.2k

Part Summary: Spike and Y/N return to Sunnydale after she sees the ghost of Joyce. 

A/N: sorry this is so short. I’m trying to catch up with everything. I hope you enjoy X

P.S. imagine Y/N and Spike sitting like they are in the gif... so cute! 

Masterlist

Standing outside the Summers's house, Spike and I hold hands. I 'poofed' us back to Sunnydale right after things calmed down. Joyce is dead, everything doesn't feel real. That's the thing about death though, the thing that proves we are alive is the same also makes the living feel numb.

"I'll get you through this," Spike states comfortingly at my side.

I look to him weakly. "I feel so... numb, is that terrible?"

"No, anything you feel right now is fine." He rubs his hand up and down my spine as he brings me into his side.

"Have you wanted to run away? I mean, we just did," I shrug. "I forced you to with me. I lost control, became so vile, and tried to drag you down with me," I face Spike, growing more and more guilt-ridden.

"Love, it wasn't you!" He cups my face. "You wouldn't have done any of that had you been normal."

"I was there. I could see everything. I could feel everything," I recall, starring down at the pavement between our feet. "Yet, I didn't care. It was like seeing the world in 2D."

"Well, we're home now. You can make things right," Spike plants a kiss on my forehead and lingers there.

"Will they even want to talk to me?" I mutter, afraid of what Buffy and the others might say.

I was so horrible to them and now this.

"I think they'll want family," he assures me.

Anxiously, I hardly make it to the porch. Spike has to lead the way. While squeezing his hand, I cling to his arm. Honestly, I hate being so nervous. I know what I'm capable of and I know Spike is right. I just can't shake the guilt for what I've done.

Spike knocks on the front door, something he's clearly not used to doing. Within a few seconds, someone answers the door and Buffy stands on the other side of the door.

"Miss me?" I say lightheartedly, though I don't feel that way.

Buffy switches her focus between Spike and me. "How did-"

"I saw her," I answer before she can finish.

"You saw Mom?!" She pulls me inside eagerly.

"Don't tell Dawnie. She's still kind of spooked by it," Spike warns her, keeping me close protectively.

"I haven't seen a ghost since... Let's just say I only see people close to me," I remark vaguely.

"Could you talk to her again?!" Buffy tugs at my sleeve.

"I can't control it Buffy, it sort of just happens," I explain, truly not wanting to face it again.

I would love to see Joyce and help in any way I can. The hard part is I don't have control over it. It's also frightening when a person you know to be deceased is standing in front of you. __________________________________________ After a day's worth of reunions, I'm exhausted. Dawnie was happy to see me. Everyone else was hesitant to trust me or be around me again which is entirely fair. Tara was the most afraid. She hid behind Willow timidly most of the time. I learned that Joyce died the afternoon I saw her. Buffy had found her, and hours later, she appeared to me. Buffy hadn't even had the chance to call Giles yet.

After Dawnie has gone to bed, we all gather in the living room to discuss the matter at hand. We have to figure out what to do about Joyce and making plans. Spike settles into the armchair and guides me down with him. I sit in his lap and curl up in a ball comfortably. Ever since we got back to Sunnydale, he hasn't left my side. He's practically glued to me. Whenever someone says something mildly sassy toward me, he snaps at them. I figured Spike could be protective, but this isn't what I would have envisioned. He's being clingy even, it's almost comical.

"Buffy, of course, has the final say," Xander states a matter-of-factly about funeral plans.

My cousin's eyes grow wide and she perks up from her rested position on the couch.

"What?! I don't know anything about this!" She stammers. "Y/N should have the final say. After all, she's dealt-" Buffy stops herself.

I snicker lightly, "I've seen the sort of planning that goes into a funeral, I get it."

She frowns, "I didn't mean-"

"I know. You're not wrong," I laugh a little with a shrug.

Spike wraps his arms around me, pulling me closer to his chest if that's even humanly possible. I melt into his embrace as I rest my head on his shoulder.

"Could you... do you think you could tell us a little more about how you saw Joyce?" Tara stutters beside Willow.

Spike starts to object, "I don't think-"

I place my hand over his, "it's okay... it was strange," I describe to the group. "It was though she was there. It was a full-body apparition. It must've required a lot of energy for her."

"How long until she can show herself to you again?" Buffy questions swiftly.

"I don't know," I answer truthfully. "It all depends."

"On what?" She rushes.

"I don't know," I repeat, a tad more impatient than I intended to sound.

At the end of the long day, Buffy offers me my old room to which I take gratefully. Spike decides to stay with me, just in case something were to happen, such as seeing Joyce again. The two of us curl up into a bed for the evening under the warm quilt. Spike brings me to his side and I rest my cheek on his chest.

"Love?" He breaks the comfortable silence.

"Yes?" I yawn.

"Do you remember when we were in New Orleans and you saw a vision in my eyes? You weren't you but-"

"I did?" I question, lifting my head to meet his gaze.

His eyes pour into mine as they glisten under the moonlight pouring in from the opposite windows.

"You said I was hurt or something at one point," he goes on with a hint of worry in his tone.

"I did? I don't remember that," I confess.

"It was the last thing you said before you said 'I'll find you," he describes as his fingertips glide up and down my spine.

"I wish I could remember," I swallow hard. "That frightens me."

Seeing a vision of Spike possibly hurt and not remembering it so more frustration than I can express.

"You also said, "I'll say it first," he adds. "It's probably nothing. You were tired anyway."

"I suppose we'll find out someday," I shrug, still a tad annoyed I can recall it.

"Remember, dammit!" He laughs, poking my sides. "I want to know!"

His attitude lightens the mood and naturally eases my mind.

"Me too, but it doesn't work that way!" I laugh, swatting his hands away from my sides as I wiggle.

Playfully, Spike rolls me onto my back as he hovers over me. I giggle as he continues to tickle my sides, and I squeal for help. Under the moonlight, he appears so angelic. His white hair shines and reflects the light. His blue eyes appear like sea glass. He’s been so remarkable these last few days. I’m seeing a comforting side to him that many have the chance to experience. What did I do to deserve him?

___________________________

Masterlist

Tags: @it-was-all-a-beautiful-dream @hexmancia @mx-pibbles @setsuna-meiou31 @nightowl1115​

[theajaheira]

im so serious btw where the FUCK does he get off. how the fuck does he think he has the right to so much as exist in the same space as that man. i don't care if he's bleeding out on the road he should never once have ever come to giles's house. never. what a fucking phenomenally self-absorbed piece of shit move. not only is he lost in guilt over all the different people he killed to the point where he feels he should kill himself rather than honor jenny GIVING UP HER LIFE to give him this chance at living, a fact that he and the show at large never so much as CONSIDER in this whole "evil wearing jenny's face" thing, he shows up at the house of the man whose LIFE HE DESTROYED and goes "can you help me? :(" i can give angel some leniency for some things and i am willing to be argued with about some of my harsh calls about him but this is one that i think is irrefutably awful and selfish of him. even giles points it out within canon.

and i think eighty to ninety percent of the reason i'm so furious about angel pulling this shit isn't just because of the action itself and what it does to giles! it's because the way i see it, he has two options here when there's weird supernatural shit going down -- he could go to giles, or he could go to buffy. he is not in contact with giles right now. arguably, buffy is the most intuitive choice when it comes to a thing like this, because he's been talking to her already and IDK MAYBE GILES MIGHT NOT WANT TO HELP HIM BUT WE KNOW THAT BUFFY DOES. but it is very clear based on what we know about angel that he makes this choice because he doesn't want buffy to have to take care of him after everything he did to her. giles is collateral. giles is angel's collateral. giles is always and forever angel's collateral. angel places his own well-being over giles's but not over buffy's, even though he has systemically ripped apart giles's life and personally tortured him and left jenny's body in the bed of the very apartment he's showing up at. angel spins a little fantasy about jenny (who GAVE HIM BACK HIS LIFE) hating him and wanting him to die, because he has never once thought of her as a three-dimensional person as angelus OR as angel. i want to run angel over with a goddamn zamboni.

[oveliagirlhaditright]

You know what I’ve decided? The comic writers/Joss Whedon (when he was there writing some of this. Because I guess he left the comics somewhere between season 10 and 12), didn’t exactly know just what they wanted to do with the Twilight!Angel stuff, or how far they wanted to go in making him kind of evil there.

Like, at the end he kills Giles. -gasps- Which is absolutely horrible, right? But, nah. It’s totally okay, because he was possessed, so it wasn’t really his fault. ...Except then the comics do this weird thing, where they then say that part of him did want to kill Giles? What? Which then makes me wonder why they even had him possessed at all, then. Just have him flat-out kill Giles himself at that point. As much as I wouldn’t want that, but at least it would be a consistent narrative line. But whatever. However you want to make sense of that all, Angel of course ends up regretting it and brings Giles back to life, and makes up for that sin that way.

Also, in season 8, Angel almost acts like he’s going to leave their friends in their universe, saying they can handle the fight there themselves and can maybe even help them from the Twilight universe they created. He says that Buffy can’t help them forever, and that this is no different than when she died and they would have had to face things alone then. But then Angel & Faith season 9 acts like his plan was to pull them in to and Buffy’s universe. This is either one writer not knowing what the other was doing (who didn’t even go back to reread season 8, to double check what the writing staff had just done), or a retcon to try and save Angel’s character some?

And then, all these Slayers (and other people) got killed with Angel’s plan here. I think Buffy mentions that near two-hundred Slayers were in the crossfire? And, yes. It actually probably would have been worse if Angel hadn’t essentially been a double agent, who the government was putting all their hopes and dreams onto, distracting everyone with big plans that would never really come into fruition. But still. And initially, Buffy is rightfully pissed off at Angel about all her lost sisters. But then the narrative completely forgets about all of this, and lists the death of Giles as the worst thing Angel ever did and the only thing he has to make up for here. I know he didn’t actually kill anyone himself in this arc, and maybe that’s why it suddenly shifts gears? But it seems like a big leap, to suddenly go from Point A to Point B.

The whole thing is honestly such a mess, that I really wish had never happened.

I GET why they did it (I think). I really do. I think it was to payoff the entire Wolfram & Hart plot from Angel the Series, but was it worth it at all imo? No.

I think it hurt Angel’s character more than anything.

And maybe he’s kind of in good graces again by the end of the comics, but I don’t know if I would have risked all his good writing from the shows like this if I were the writers.

Edit: I also know that the Angel in season 8 is one who had just gotten back from Hell (again). All of L.A. had gotten sucked into L.A., in fact, after his bright idea in “Not Fade Away”--and he was told that all of Earth would be sucked into Hell, if he didn’t do this. So, when he was given this bright idea, that he could create this perfect new universe and help humanity evolve that way, with some slight bloodshed to get there, he definitely latched onto that idea over the alternative. This was a highly traumatized Angel, not in his right mind. Who was, of course, swayed by selfishness for once, that he could finally get his happy ending with Buffy this way, too. But even with all this, and me of course feeling a lot of sympathy there... I’m like, really, Angel? Really? And really, writers? -sigh-

[idjitlili]

You're dead lachance.

Spike btvs x reader

Summary: Being Giles niece, going to America with him, only to meet Spike. There is anonymous request in here, 'getting locked in a room with Spike.'

A/n: slightly in Sundale , but mostly based in Los Angeles, the reader is British, due to being related to Giles. Hey, that's good for me , I'm British too. There's a request from anon but I'm not going to say to keep it a surprise. Malteser is a chocolate ball. How come I can write this much now? But I've got assignment s at are only 2000k words.

Word count:5019 Longest imagine yet.

Warnings: Language, Twilight hate references,period, questioning if vampires eat that answer is no or unconfirmed.

Not even a week ago, you had came home , only for your parental figure to rush to the door to greet you. Not long after that you were packing your suitcase for America , apparently your uncle Rupert had invited you out there. It had quite literally been years seen you had seen him, but not long until you would again.

In fact , it hadn't been even twenty four hours , before you were stood in his magic store. You weren't even sure why Rupert had brought you here. The suitcase that held your belongings , stood at your feet as Rupert  had welcomed you in, unlike your uncle had expected , the shop was completely empty, people wise.

Forced to sit down, while Rupert  made you a tea,informing you that he would get you settled at his home once he finished closing up his shop. What it felt like hours to you ,waiting, deciding it was best to read the book you had brought with you, not that you could really concentrate you just wanted to get cleaned up , in honesty.

Fingers tapping against the pine table , trying to read Boromir's last moments in Lord of the rings, re reading the same paragraph over , and over. "I tried to take the Ring from Frodo ' , he glance strayed to his fallen enemies,20." Re reading those words same words, unable to comprehend them, like your brain was blocked by a tinfoil hat, that's bullshit. Three arrows he had been struck with, yet he was still able to kill twenty highly trained orcs , more than an average vampire could do.

You were no stranger to vampires , you hadn't encountered one to say, but you knew of Rupert  job as a watcher. Though you had watched Lord of the rings many times (or not it's just replace it) and yet you still couldn't pass it , didn't Rupert have workers to clean his shop? Repeating those words , still. "Hello ,love." You almost peed yourself , standing up abruptly launching your book at the thing that had pulled you out of your distracted book reading.

Bragging your lighter from your pocket, self defence lighter, holding in front of you. As the flame lit,lifting your head up at your 'attacker' , only to be met with a smirk and platinum leather wearing man, who had caught your book with ease. "Really a lighter?" British, you had not spoken to one American , since landing.

You had just continued to stare at him not quite certain what to say, until he did again. "So , Boromir ,hm?"  You hadn't notice him step forward , holding your book for you to take back, hesitating you took it from him slowly. "Uh, yes. Thank you,but ,um, who are you?"

"Spike, and you are?"Who names there son after a sharp object? Spike had smugly smiled , placing his in his trouser pockets, it was if he was proud. You didn't get a chance to respond to Spike, before Rupert had reappeared , standing between you and Spike.

"Spike , get away from my niece, I will not allow you to corrupt her." Spike had gasped dramatically, putting his had over his mouth ,"You're related to him? But Blimey he's all ARGH and you're not." Spikes face of disgust when he looked at your uncle, Rupert had removed his glasses and began cleaning his glasses.

"Was that supposed to be a compliment?" Picking up your bags , as Rupert ushered Spike out of the shop, with you behind to lock up, it now being dark.  "It was lovely to meet you , Giles attractive niece.." "Y/n." "Y/n.." Repeating your name back slowly smiling , only if you knew he was an evil defective vampire.

"Quit the flirting Spike, she's not going to be here long." That was the last you saw of Spike , for now anyways. It wasn't even another 24 hours later , your uncle had sent you off to Los Angeles , to Wesley at Wolfram & Hart.

Wesley...you had seen him in years , since he left England. You being younger than him by some years , but you had been friends with him , being connected to Giles and all. You were brought to America to work for an evil law firm not your ideal future.

That was a year ago , not as bad as you had originally thought, Angel the CEO was indeed broody but he was trying to make a difference. In fact , the job paid very well, and all you did really read up on demons and sometimes view bodies for symbols and such.

Perhaps,yes, it did get quite lonely, it  wasn't like you had you mum to make you meals or anything. All you could have was calls from her now and then. Wesley was your friend; but he was too busy flirting with Fred. The others well, you weren't close friends, just friends.

Today was not a great day for you, first you had gotten to work  without lunch, forgotten a jacket, and Angel scheduled a meeting but you had fallen down the stairs three times. Ten minutes late, a huge bruise on your head , ruffled hair and clothing not looking very bodacious.

Knocking on the door to Angel's office three times gently , before waiting for his response to allow you in. Everyone staring at you , your face flushed with embarrassment. "I-I'm so sorry, you won't believe today has been horrible, I wouldn't have been late if I hadn't of fallen down the same stairs three times."

Heavily breathing from all the rushing, head aching like you had just hit your head falling down the stairs, Angel and the others looking at you with slight sympathy. "I've got to get a look at this muppet." That voice, you knew that that voice, until Spike had appeared from the corner of the meeting room , as you and Angel were about to walk into the room.

Almost bumping into Spike as you and him both met the door at the same time. You two would've bumped right into each other, but he passed right though you. Turning back around to see if you imagined that or not, turns out you didn't Spike was stood in front you , looking at you , with gaped mouth which didn't last long until he was smiling.

"W-what?H-how did y-" "Nice to see you again , love. Well, not long after you left I saved the world, and died. No need to thank me , love," Angel had coughed , pulling your attention from Spike charming smile he was sending your way, to him gesturing you to sit.

Spike had not decided to sit down , but to stand behind Angel at an Angel, one to annoy Angel which you could already see in his face , two to be in eye range of you. Not that he liked you , he full loved Buffy, for now anyways.

Angel had officially began the meeting , head-aching still, probably why you couldn't concentrate, concussion. All you could think was , wow Casper the friendly ghost, well you didn't know he wasn't , and that he was a vampire.

So lost in thought ,well no just pain , you didn't hear the calling of your name or snapping of fingers in front of your open eyes.

"Y/n? Y/n?" Only when there is a touch of a small hand on your shoulder , you realise , looking up to see Fred. "Yes, sorry. Um , I hit my head a bit too hard."

"Angel , she needs to go to a doctor. Her head is literally bleeding out , ""Yeah you should've sent her straight away, she fell down the fucking stairs, for a vampire with a soul , you have no compassion." Spike had interrupted Wesley, to criticise Angel.

You had a couple of days off last week , to visit your family, hence you hadn't seen Spike there before that. You had fallen off your chair when you had felt a hand on your shoulder, moving to see if that was Angel or Lorne, but it wasn't.

"Already on your knees for me?" Spike, staring down at you , smirking what a shock. "I'm not even on my knees, I'm on my butt. Plus what you want me to do mime."

"Okay, okay, Hon, let's go take to a doctor." Lorne had helped you up, as Spike had smiled Wider, as you both left, with some calls of sympathy's.

You only had to have you bloody head , in your hairline glued back together. Not surprising when there was blood dripping down your face like a waterfall. Other than that you were back the next day, carrying on your week like you would normally would.

Each week that went by Spike would come visit your office, mostly at lunch, knowing you didn't leave your office to socialise, only to use the bathroom. It had started with him using the excuse that he wanted to see how you were doing , after falling down the stairs, which was quite hard to believe,as he didn't seem like the caring type.

Then it he came to your office to tell you stories  about him saving the world and just recently , almost being killed by another ghost.

You hadn't even seen that when he entered your office he used the door by turning the handle, instead of going through it. Not at least until he had spooked you again ,placing his hand your shoulder squeezing it slightly.  Falling again out of you chair, probably would've smacked the back of your head on your desk.

If you weren't grabbed by your forearms, and were lifted back onto your feet, by rough hands... Spike had scared you to death again, yet this time he had saved your fall.  Pulling a arm from his, looking into his eyes, as you brought your hand to his cheek, your finger tips against his cheek bone. His skin soft, not how you would've imagined.

Cold.

His skin, cold , but now he isn't a ghost? So why does he feel like the other side of the pillow on a summer night. Moments go by ,not many , before you pulled away again. "Fred , s-she figured out how to bring y-you back?" Still wondering why he felt like ice,  also to hide the embarrassment that you had touched his face without asking.

"No, someone sent me some post,"  The distance between you two was more than close, your legs pressed against your desk, Spike's face barely inches away, he must've closed in on you. "Oh lovely,um have you had anything to eat yet?" He had smiled at you , with lust in glittering in his eyes , but not for what you might think, but hunger.

"I have not." Don't turn Edward ,please, no one wants that ,'Oh I'm sorry Bella but you might die if we fuck, because of my huge Thanos sized dick.' "Oh , well I've got , um, some sandwiches, that's if you want to share." You had gently made your way passed Spike as he nodded slightly suggesting we would share, to get into your bag, reaching for your lunch bag.

Both sitting at the sofa in your handing Spike a sandwich, as you held yours, facing each other, sitting on your calves, well Spike couldn't do that , if you know what you mean. Not long after you had reached for your flask , pouring it into your cup. "Tea?" Spike had grabbed the cup from your hand, drinking a fair lot down, before handing it back to you, mixture of crumbs and tea around his mouth. "You know how to make good tea, not those bloody Americans , milk first , bloody bullshit."

Before anything was said, Lorne had burst into the room , panic washed over his face. "Angel needs you both , quick honeys! We don't have time to spare." To say the least you were confused , never less you all headed to Angel's office and soon enough you were all, Angel, Spike, Fred, Gunn, Wesley, and Lorne were driving to a safe house. 'A rescue mission.' Apparently, you didn't even know who you were supposed to rescue, all you knew was you was all supposed to stay here until they arrived.

Sounded fishy , and you were right to think so, not long after you all discovered it was a trap. Probably just about a hundred vampires, were lurking around the property, waiting...

The floors creaking as you all walked across the the pine wood hallway, not to mention you had barely any fighting stills, all you held was a stake. The others well that ways a mixture of axes , and stakes. Sorry not only vampires in this house, spirits too. Spike had paired off with you , whilst the others did the same , you both walked into a bedroom, which was thick with mould and dust.

Not even one step in the door had slammed shut, Spike had immediately tried the door body slamming against , but it was no use. As you made your way to the window, "Spike.." BANG still going at the door , "SPIKE." Whisper shouting to him, gesturing for him to come over , once he had heard you.

"Vampires..." pulling you away from the window, out of sight." We need to get out of here, now."

"Where? we can't get out of here." Looking around the room there was no options. You don't even get to take a breath ; before the window is smashed in as well of the door, you are both completely circled , 7 vampires.  Before you know it they are lunged for you , gripping your stake tightly , as you fight  a vampire off , with struggle , god damnit. Where's David from lost boys, instead you are stuck with one that's never brushed it's teeth.

Finally stabbing it in the heart. Proof another one bites the dust. Now there was even more dust in this house. The rest of the vampires were dead, you didn't realise that Spike had taken on the rest with no struggle, turning to face you after dusting the last one, his face,his face. He was one of them, he had been dead this whole time , even when he was brought back.

"Y-you're a vampire?" Shocked was to say the least what you were feeling , he had turned back laughing lightly.

"What were you expecting? The Easter bunny?Did you think I was human? This whole time, oh love." It wasn't that you felt like you trusted him less after finding out but still, you're an idiot, no you are not.  "I thought you were because you are my food; Plus I thought vampires were evil?"

"I wasn't going to refuse a sandwich. I have Soul, love. For your information, I got it the hard way, not like that brooding bugger."

"Sorry, Can we go now?" Thus Spike tried the door again, it had opened, both of you rushed out and down the stars , out the doors to find the others in the car waiting , like it was a robbery.

Your lunches with Spike continued even months after finding out he was a vampire; yet now you packed enough lunch for the two of you. Though he could just have his blood, but no he wanted your food. In honesty he was lucky that you actually shared your food with him.

You were sure that Spike must've preferred the company of Fred over you, and there was a day that he didn't have lunch with you. Apparently he had went to see Buffy , yet he was back the next day, why he hadn't stayed with the woman he loved , that was unknown to you. Thus there he was having lunch with you everyday you were at work.

You had even watched Lost boys with him one lunch. "You think I'm like that ponce?" Why the offices had TVs you had no idea. You had told Spike that he had reminded you of David. "W-what, It's not that hard to believe , first both of you have cool hair , two he is evil but the evil that you're like wow he's not that bad , he's cute and maybe he not what he seems. Like Loki, God of mischief." Spike had scoffed, laughing slightly.

"Did you just call me cute? I'm bad , I'm evil, mortals quiver under my wrath." He had made a toothy scrunched face , whilst bringing his hands up like he was a bear attacking, only to make you grin harder. "Okay, now you are a kinky Loki 'quiver under my wrath' seriously?"

"And how would you know what's kinky, love?" His words delivered with a smirk , that made your cheeks redden just by his gaze. "Uh,um, well I read a lot- I MEAN I do stuff all the time like last night.. he had a cane."

"Oh really, he had a cane?"

"Yep thats correct."

"Well that's a shame, love , because I've seen you face stuck in your books , blushing... and I can smell the innocence radiating off of you."

"Hey! Don't go smelling that, so you're telling me that when I have my period you can smell that too? You know what don't answer that, nor do I want to know if you've ever eaten that. Nor do I want to know why I thought of that.." Throwing a Malteser at him, would've hit him if he hadn't caught it in his mouth. 

"I cannot believe you just said that. Love, you have too much time over thinking."

"No doubt , that's why I was never popular , let's pretend I never said that thing and only that compared you to David and Loki, hm?"

"Of course, I wish you hadn't given me the idea,joking I swear."

"Uh, I don't know if you like men or not but when the male part is erected it's one of the most blood filled appendages plus I looked you up, William the bloody, maybe that's how you got your name.." Yes maybe you spent more than your lunch hour not doing work, sitting cross legged now facing Spike completely , who just had turned his upper body from the tv.

Angel though, you'd think he was just happy , happy that Spike wasn't in his office constantly annoying him. It wasn't easy for anyone to keep Spike entertained. "I do not suck cocks nor have I ever , love, I have nothing against those that do,but I assure you that my terrible poetry is the only reason for the name, "

"Nothing to do with you killing hundreds of people?"

"Oh yeah, that too." Nothing more was spoken, you both had went back watching until lunch was over, then you were back to work. By five you had left to go home , not even two hours later you had realised you had left your house keys in your office. You had went to the shops, for some general stuff , hence why you hadn't realised you had left your keys.

Making it back to Wolfram & Hart , around nine o'clock, deciding to get some food , for after you got your keys and got home finally. The security man, Dean, had let you , well no he had was turned doing something and you slipped in, the rest of the firm was dark , everyone had left, or that's what you had thought.

Opening your office door, with your key, why you had it separated from your house key , you don't know , but it was lucky you had one set otherwise someone could've went through your stuff. Well there wasn't much really interesting, ancient books and such. Rushing to your desk in the dark searching everywhere , under your desk, in the draws, the floor.

Finally finding them down the side of the sofa , which you were sat at with Spike, watching Lost boys. When the door swings open , you are quickly grabbed by the foreman's and are shoved against the wall."what are doing here?" The mans voice, aggressive, yet you know who it belonged to, Spike. No very difficult to figure out as you spent at least an hour with him , five times a week, for months.

"Uh, I just left my keys." Spikes grip had loosened on your arms slightly. " Y/n?" Pushing him off of you,"yes, yes it's me , thanks for attacking me, " It was pitch black in your office , only the light from the moon , now on your face , part of it anyways.

"Well, Bloody hell, love you shouldn't be in an evil law firm by your lonesome , especially at night."

"What you are going to eat me now?" Spike wasn't even a foot away; if he was a live you'd feel his breath on your face. Instead the cold air surrounded you, Spikes arm above your head closing you in, only being able to look at his face , an outline of it. "Oh, you'd just love that, wouldn't you,pet?" You had scoffed lightly at him.

"Shut up, my foods getting cold , and I don't like it in here." Ducking under Spikes arm, grabbing your food and key, before making your way out your office and the building. Spike following you ,but the security guard was gone and the door was locked , no way out.

"Well isn't that bloody brilliant."

"There's no way we are getting out of here , till morning ,"

"Can't we call someone?"

"I don't know , do you have anyone's number?" That was it , you both had headed back to your office , found some candle, since the electricity had been turned off, at on the floor with your food. You weren't sure why he decided to stay with you , maybe it was just that you had food.

Your back against the sofa , as you both ate , you were in no doubt that you were talking tomorrow off. You knew you or Spike was going to have to sleep on the sofa, ah yes perfect, back pains. "Why were you here so late anyways?" After finishing your mouthful of food, why Spike would want to lurk here at night , that was unknown.

"Just snooping through Angels stuff, then I heard you, so."

"Ah, of course." Smirking at you , leaning back his palms behind him, sideways on from you, uh , you're not Ryan Reynolds? Actual um, sorry but you're hotter. Your food all gone , except the small amount of drink left.

"Honestly this couldn't be a better day, my keys fell down the side of the sofa , and I didn't realise until I went home. Then this happened , and now we are stuck here, when I could be at home, sleeping."

"It's not so bad, you could've been stuck here with Angel, love."

" You really don't like Angel, I'm not surprised he makes small problems seem unsolvable. Yet within a couple of hours , all is fine. Actually that sounds a lot like me, over thinking everything. But yeah Angels is a bit of an arse."

Spike only smirking at you, in return.

Glancing at your watch , 12:03 , you were only lucky that Spike was able to pick the lock on the toilets. Otherwise you don't know what you would've done, ah yes, peeing yourself in front a rather good looking , dead man. Leaving your office to go pee again , before returning rubbing your eyes as you walked through the door.

"Are you going to get some sleep, love?" Spike had cleaned up all the rubbish, throwing it all away, you wouldn't expect that from dead guy, former mummy's boy. "Uh, if the sofa wasn't built like a rock, yes , but since that's the case no." Settling back onto the floor, careful not to catch on fire, as you crossed passed some of candles.

Instead of Spike replying yet , he had stood up and made his way to the sofa , plopping himself onto it, with poof. "You got to be joking love , you clearly never have lived in a crypt." W h at was it wish vampires living in crypts , or complaining that their huge cold dick will spilt a human in half. Turning to face the sofa, not being able to see Spike, letting out a dry laugh.

"Yeah that doesn't convince me, are you just so old that you don't remember that every day at lunch that I sit on that sofa with you?" Spike had sat up to look at you with a glare ,yet again scoffing. "Well then , Pet, how about you come lay on me, I'm very comfortable."

Without thought you had gotten up , and thrown yourself onto Spike, both groaning as your back slammed into Spikes chest. He was lucky really that your butt bone , not tail bone, the top of your leg one, didn't smash into his parts. Instead he had wrapped around you so you were stuck in place. "I see what you are doing."

"And what is that?"

"I body slammed you, now you're cuddling with me? Mental , you're an ice cube, yeahh sureeee so comfortable, I love being engulfed by Vanilla ice."  Not that he looked much like Vanilla ice but it's a little funny, not really but.

"Hey, I won't stand to be your cushion , with your bullying."

"Didn't you kill hundreds of people? And you get defensive when I call you Robert van Wrinkle?" Turning your head to look up to Spike who was looking down on you, shuffling so that you were laying next to the sofa back and on Spike with your hand on his chest.

"Love,I'll eat you, try sleep." This isn't a Loki imagine when he kidnaps you and it turns out he's a vampire , and he gets busy and drinks your blood for a fetish. Spikes arms around your shoulder , eventually falling asleep with your head on his chest.

Everything was fine, until Wesley and the rest of them had came looking for you. As you was supposed to be in a meeting with them in the morning , so was Spike but they were worried for you.

"Couldn't they do that at home?"

"Can I poke them with a stick?"

"Ah yes, poke the mass murdering vampire , very smart ,Gunn. "

No consideration of being quiet, you both had been woken, it wouldn't be that surprising if Spike was pretending to be asleep , to avoid talking to people he didn't like very much except Fred.

Waking up to see a bunch of people just smiling at you at , wasn't the best. "So, Spike what about Buffy?" Sitting up ,before standing up from Spike, must've hurt having a whole body on you all night , maybe it didn't effect him because he has super strength? Spike just turned to sit on the sofa , unimpressed facial expression, hunched.

"Buffy has her own life, I'm not apart of it."

"I-is this all you came her for? To wake us? And   taunt? I'm taking the day off ," No uncertainty that you wanted to get home, and shower and eat. You had looked back at Spike who had looked back , standing up. "I'll drive you."  Grabbing your bag, before bow in front of Angel for whatever reason. "Thank you so much for locking us in an evil law firm all night. Bye Fred, Wesley, Gunn , Lorne."

"Bye hon." Lorne was always a sweetheart , wishing that every guy was like him, kindest soul and very much cute. Spike and you had left after you had sent Lorne a smile. Walking out with bed hair and day old clothes , not that Spike had offered his arm but you were still holding onto to walk.

Walking past Harmony, she had sent daggers your way, why doesn't she just kidnap Orlando Bloom or something. Gripping onto Spikes arm tighter , walking down the stairs, not falling this time, thankfully. Before you made it to Angels' car park, and got into one of this favourite cars. "Uh, are we supposed to be taking Angels car?"

"What? It's mine, love, what are you going on about?" Opening the the car door at the same time , settling in the seats before slamming the door shut. The windows of the car , made from the same glass that wolfram & Hart was supplied with, since the cars were supplied by wolfram & Hart for Angel, a vampire. That also meant that Spike could drive in the sunlight protected.

"Okay, okay." Once you had made it into your building car park, Spike had walked with you up to your door. Being finally able to unlock your door, with your shopping ,lucky there wasn't any fridge nor freezer items. Turning back to Spike who just stood at your door, grinning slightly.

"T-thank you for staying with me yesterday, and for driving me home." A small blush upon your face, it wasn't unknown to you that you had developed a crush on Spike , how couldn't you? "That's alright ,love." Still stood in front of you, looking into your e/c eyes , you staring into his brightly lit blue ones. He was waiting for you to say or to do something.

Leaning to the side of his face, to press a peck onto his pale toned cheek. Instead of course , he had turned and you ended up pressing your lips , onto his briefly. Pulling away red cheeked , Spike now smirking at you again. "H-hey um, do you want to come and watch Lord of the rings with me?" You weren't sure what you was supposed to say after kissing someone accidentally.

"I would," thus that you held your door open wide, "I invite you into my home."

Therefore, you watched Lord of the rings with a dead man.

[jay-wells-writes]

Training (Giles x plus size reader)

Oh my Dear Boudoir Anon, it took some time but I have something for you! and let me tell you that I hate it lmao. Like I love how the end went, but I am unsure about the beginning. BUT I am my worst critic right? Regardless I hope that you enjoy the story hun. 

Gif taken from internet, credit to the maker

It was hard to believe that in the year you moved to Sunnydale you made friends with a group of college students that fought monsters. Of course you made a mistake and hadn’t taken the warning your roommates had told you, about not going out at night. So your first night in a new town and you almost became vampire food. Naturally after being saved you became friends with the group of students known as the Scooby Gang. 

You knew nothing of fighting or monsters so you mainly stayed back at the Magic shop and did research for the group and ran the shop when Giles went out with them. Even if you couldn’t be a great fighter like Buffy, you still asked to be trained and Buffy gave that job to Giles. You should have known she would give the job to Giles, but when you learned it was him you quickly made excuses not to train. You couldn’t help but feel like it would be a waste of his time. And it didn't take Giles long to corner you and find out what the problem was.

"I just don't want to waste your time."

"I do not see me making sure you are safe as a waste of my time."

"Giles, take a look at me and then at the group. When you figure it out then come find me."

You hadn't even turned around before Giles was commenting back.

"How does your weight have anything to do with this?"

"It didn't dawn when I first asked that it would take years to train me. I am so out of shape."

Suddenly Giles was walking you backwards as he removed his glasses to clean them. A move you learned he does when he is frustrated or annoyed. 

"Your size has nothing to do with this, we start off small. We work you towards a goal then make another. Right now I would be happy if you just knew how to shoot a crossbow or any other type of weapon." 

Nodding your head once you took a deep breath as you looked into his eyes.

"Alright Giles. Let's do this."

~~

True to his word Giles started you off on weapons, while also teaching you simple stretches to help loosen your muscles. After about three months, to your surprise, you had become very skilled with a bow. You couldn’t help but be slightly disappointed that through all the training you hadn’t lost much weight. But soon you and the others started to notice that parts of your body were becoming firmer. And naturally you started to gain more confidence.

Coming through the back of the shop you looked around and saw that you were alone. Thinking that Giles was in the front you set down your things and removed your jacket so that you could start on your stretches. Getting lost in your thoughts you realized you had gone through your whole warm up routine and Giles still hadn’t showed up. Grabbing a bottle of water you headed to the front to see what was going on. A quick look around the shop showed that he wasn’t busy and when you turned to the right you saw him sitting at a table with his head in the books. You knew that Giles wasn’t someone you wanted to sneak up on, so as you made your way to him you made sure to speak loudly.

“A new big bad show up that I didn’t know about?”

Turning quickly in his seat Giles turned to look at you. Just like he did anytime he was off on time Giles looked at his watch before he took his glasses off and rubbed his eyes.

"No. No new big and bad. I just got a new shipment of books in and I got caught up on reading."

Leaning against the table next to him you tried to look at the title but Giles was quick to cover it. Because you had been used to rough housing with Xander you automatically reach across him to grab the book. Not even thinking about it as you reached across him, your chest ended up in his face. It didn't dawn on you at first but when you felt Giles breath on your chest you remembered that your workout outfit had changed from baggy clothes to sweatpants and a form fitting tank top. That gave Giles a birds eye view down your shirt. 

Trying not to pull more attention to an already embarrassing situation you slowly pulled back to your original position, and acted as Giles face wasn't just in your chest.

"Why are you hiding the title Giles?"

Standing up and gathering the book and a couple other things Giles began to walk towards the back as he stuttered slightly over his words.

"The book is… well it's about…. You know it really isn't that important. "

"Well we both know that's a lie. If it wasn't you wouldn't have hidden it's cover." Stopping suddenly you couldn't help but place your hands on your hips. "Giles! Are you reading porn?"

Spinning around quickly Giles gave you a brief fish out of water expression before he answered. 

"I beg your pardon! I would not read porn at the shop! NOT that, that's what it is." 

Deciding to pick on him some more you couldn't help but smile as you walked towards him.

"You were so reading porn. Just count yourself lucky it was me that found you and not someone like Xander."

Nodding his head in agreement you heard Giles mumble something about "Never hearing the end of it." Before he snapped back to the present and to you. "The book isn't about porn, but fae magic. Of course I should have known there would have been a descriptive chapter on the not so innocent parts of fae's."

"Ohh does it have pictures?"

"No it doesn't have pictures! I really don't feel we need to be having this conversation."

"Why?"

"Well because you are a young adult and I am your senior."

"Keyword there Giles, adult. I may be younger than you but I am an adult."

If you hadn't been looking at Giles face you would have missed the way his eyes shot down to your chest before quickly looking back up. Even though you pretended not to notice you could help but feel your heart racing at the look Giles had given you. Taking his glasses off, Giles rubbed his eyes and muttered something that sounded like "Yes, how could I forget." Before you could ask him to clarify what he had said Giles was holding his hand, that held his glasses out, as he spoke louder.

"Yes well. Shall we start your training?"

Training felt different today, at first you tried to chalk it up to finally learning some basic defense moves. That the tension was because of you both being in close proximity, but after about 20 minutes you began to realize it was because of what had happened earlier. Until today you never thought about Giles in any way, other than a teacher. Yet you couldn't help but realize how firm his body was for a man his age, how his voice sounded as he spoke softly into your ear, or how he smelled like the incense he sold at the shop. You weren't given any time to really think about it though because teaching weapons was different then hand to hand and this Giles was a bit stricter and he didn't give breaks as often as weapons training. Luckily you got a small break when Giles was called to the front of the store.

Sitting down on the mat you worked on stretching as you watched Giles walking away. You knew the tension was because of earlier and your mind was telling you to let it go. That it was a fluke but your body was telling you something completely different. It has been a while since anyone has shown interest in you. And even though what happened at the table was an accident, his second look and the comment he had made hadn’t been. Age was never an issue for you, in fact you actually liked your men older and you told yourself when you first met Giles that you wouldn't mind a night with him. The question was though, was there anything there or were you just imagining there was? 

By the time Giles had gotten back you figured out that you were going to play a little and see what happens. That if he hadn't been interested he wouldn't have taken a second look. 

"Sorry about that, sometimes I question myself on having Anya helping out."

Chuckling you stood up as Giles made his way back to the middle of the room.

"I have no answer and even if I did I would plead the fifth."

Smiling Giles moved so that he stood behind you. Standing closer he lowered his voice as he moved to place you in the hold you had been working on before being called.

"If you had an answer and pleaded the fifth I have ways on getting it from you."

That sentence alone almost had you wondering if Giles had put a spell on you to read your mind. And he almost caused you to slip up and fall when he tried to take you down. Instead you planted your feet and shifted the way he had told you. Grabbing his arm you stood behind him and twisted it upwards. 

"You can't get nothing if I am the one that's got a hold on you."

Suddenly in what felt like a second Giles had himself out of the hold and was once again standing behind you. With both of your hands pinned in one of his behind your back while his other arm was around your neck.

"Never assume to have the upper hand. Anytime you do that you end up in a position you can't get out of."

"I don't know. I think I can get out of this."

If you were asked about it later you would blame it on his quick breathing in your ear, or how your bodies were even closer together. But having guts, you never had before, you turned your hand slightly and placed an open balm on Giles upper thigh. You could feel him jump a bit, but he didn't release his hold. Instead of moving your hand any more you pushed your ass into Giles as your nails dug slightly into his thigh. You could feel his breath change as he brought his face closer to yours. 

"I am not sure this is a good way to get out of a hold."

Tilting your head back you couldn't help but close your eyes.

"Oh I wouldn't try this with just anyone."

You couldn’t help but shiver when Gile's voice turned slightly darker in tone.

"I should hope not. But please, tell me what you would do if someone was you in this type of hold."

Releasing your hands Giles brought his arm around your waist while he brought the arm around your neck back so that his hand now rested on your neck. 

"Who's to say I would want to get out of this hold?"

Just as you started to move your hand that was still on his thigh. Giles let out the breath he had been holding before pushing into you with his upper body. In a couple of steps he had you at the wall. Using the hand on your hip he turned you around and pressed you into the wall. Using the hand he had around your neck he tilted your head and brought his face towards yours.

"I am very close to casting a spell to see who you really are."

Resting your hands on his chest you couldn't help but run them up and down.

"I will submit to any spell you want. Just to prove I am not under any spell."

"Then what game are you playing."

"No games. Just after earlier I had to see if I was imagining things."

"You mean when you put your chest into my face?"

Laughing you shook your head as you brought one hand down to his waist.

"No. Not then. That was an accident. I am talking about when you took that second look. If you hadn't done that I would have acted like nothing happened."

Almost on que Giles looked down at the top of your breast, while his fingers danced across the top of them.

"I guess having them so close to my face made me realize how beautiful they were and I couldn't help but look again."

For some reason your insecurities came pushing forward and you said the first thing that came to mind.

"There is nothing beautiful on me."

Almost instantly the hand around your neck tightened and Giles pushed his body into yours.

"You are NEVER to say anything like that again. Do you hear? Never again."

Reaching up you lightly touched his hand as you spoke quietly.

"Giles, I am only saying things that have been said to me. And it's okay, it's the facts of life."

You didn't think Giles could get any closer but he did. Slipping a leg between yours he made sure he had your full attention. 

"Fools, the whole lot of them. You are beautiful y/n. Not just your breast, but all of you. And if I am being completely honest, I was looking at you way before today. Today is just the first time I am admitting it to myself."

You knew there was no fighting Giles on this so you just smiled as you ran your fingers down his cheek. 

"So what do we do now?"

Grinning down at you Giles quickly moved you so that you were pressed into his back once again. While his breath tickled your ear.

"Right now we are doing nothing. You on the other hand, need to get out of this hold. And if you can do it without any tricks……. Let's just say I have some ideas on rewards."

[ex-vengeancedemon]

Averting Disasters and Other Ways to Avoid Your Problems

Chapter 2

Characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Mentions of things that occurred in Angel: The Series season 5.

Main Pairing: Buffy x Spike

Characters: Buffy, Spike, Giles, Willow, Xander, Andrew, Faith, Dawn

Summary: Set in 2008, five years after Spike's resurrection at Wolfram & Hart. Buffy is living in Cleveland guarding the hellmouth. Spike has left Angel and company and is hiding out in Chicago. The Scoobies are scattered. When something starts going wrong with the slayers around the world, it's time to get the gang back together.

Masterlist & Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Cleveland, Ohio

Buffy woke up groggy. She was still in her bed. It was still dark outside. Her eyelids felt heavy as she squinted through the dim, struggling to focus. After a disorienting minute, she shook the fog from her head and glanced at her alarm clock resting on the nightstand, its only fixture. She had meant to decorate. She would....eventually.

The segmented, glowing red numbers on her alarm informed her it was four in the morning. That couldn't be right. Could it? Had she really only slept for an hour? Add sleep deprivation to the list. Whatever list that was. List of future problems maybe.

A light patter of rain beat down on the roof and decorated the windows with beads that shimmered with the occasional passing headlights. Buffy couldn't recall forecasting rain that night. It had been still and cloudless all night. Good patrol weather. A distant crack of thunder sounded and the windows vibrated softly. 

Buffy frowned as she swung her legs out of bed. When her bare feet hit the cold wooden floor she was irritated to notice a healthy coating of dirt scattered on the ground and clinging to her soles. She would have to clean it up later. It could wait. No way did she plan on going all vacuum crazy at four a.m. She wasn't that lost to reason.

The house rattled again with a closer shock of thunder as Buffy made her way downstairs. It was kind of nice. The storm. It broke up the quiet. Buffy reached the kitchen and snatched the kettle from the stovetop. She filled it with water without bothering to turn on the lights and switched the burner on. A quick cup of tea and then back to sleep. It was something her mom had done. If she woke up in the middle of the night restless, her mom would somehow know and... what did she say? She would say something. Buffy's hand slipped slightly and the kettle dropped the rest of the way to the burner. She jumped at the sudden noise just as some water that had spilled hissed against the now red hot grills. 

Buffy held a hand to her head and winced as she noticed a fresh bruise she didn't remember getting. She sighed as she rummaged through her cupboards looking for the box of tea bags. She didn't have to look too far. The cupboards were dangerously empty. A grocery run was definitely called for. The joys of living alone.

As she grabbed an old UC Sunnydale mug from the dish rack she noticed the answering machine was flashing green again. Another message. Someone needed to cut back on the caffeine. Then again, maybe it was Giles. Maybe the time was more reasonable in England. Buffy was too tired to think about the exact time difference. 

The tea kettle started whistling and Buffy redirected her attention, pulling the kettle off and fixing her cup of tea. She had never really liked tea. But her mom had drank it and Giles drank it and so it was just something she did now. She let the cup steep while she went to check her messages.

As she reached out her hand she noticed that her sleeve was torn. And it was her favorite shirt. Buffy picked at the ripped seam in the cute white top she had bought for Dawn's graduation. Her brows furrowed. Why had she worn it on patrol? She never wore it on patrol. She didn't wear it last night.

Buffy spun around, suddenly uneasy. But she heard nothing but the light taps of rain. The kitchen was dark and empty without barely even a slinking shadow. Moving quietly and deliberately, she made her way to every door in the house and checked the locks. Everything was locked, bolted, and chained. Just as she had left it. At least, she was pretty sure that was how she had left it. 

What was that thing her mom always said? Something to do with tea. Or had it been coffee? Hot chocolate? Something about tiny marshmallows?

A note a panic started to rise in the back of her mind, but it was impossible to pinpoint why. She made her way back to the answering machine and hit the button.

"Hey B," Faith's voice came through. "Look I-" Her voice cut off, then returned with a waver. "I don't know. There's just- something's wrong. I woke up in the cemetery last night. No idea how I got there. And you never got back to me... it's been a week. I need help. Call me."

Buffy's face paled and she staggered away from the phone. A week? A week since Faith called last. It couldn't be, she- 

She couldn't remember anything.

***

Chicago, Illinois

"Where's Willow?" Spike asked, more than a little irritated. "I'm sorry but your being on the case doesn't exactly strike me as reassuring. Where's the witch?"

Andrew had made himself comfortable on the one chair Spike owned. Bit of a cheeky bastard that one. Barging into someone's home and stealing his chair. Next thing he's gonna start raiding the fridge.

Andrew raised his hands. "Hey now, patience is a virtue."

"Don't have any virtues." Spike pressed off the wall and moved to grab his jacket.

Andrew gave another nervous grin. "Right. Well. She's in Cleveland. You know..." He seemed to struggle for words. "Working on it. It's a bit of a mess right now... well, everywhere."

Spike slung his coat on and began buckling his boots. "Does she know?"

"Willow?"

Spike looked up from what he was doing with a frown. "Buffy."

The name felt strange. He hadn't said it out loud in years. No one to say it to.

"None of them know what's happening," Andrew answered, his face darkening. "We haven't been able to risk informing them. At least, not yet."

Yet. Spike hated that word. Only reason to use it was to put off some horrible thing or another.

"Where's Giles? He have anything in that bookish brain of his that'll... help?" 

Andrew shook his head. "Not yet. But he's-"

"Workin' on it. Right," Spike finished, straightening up. "Guess it's time for a little field trip then."

Andrew's face brightened up. "Oh you're gonna love the car! It's got those special glass windows... you know so you don't turn into powder and all. And," he leaned in conspiratorially, "it's a total chick magnet."

Spike raised an eyebrow at him. "Right. So I guess it's just the burning dash to the car then. Brilliant." 

Spike grabbed Andrew by the collar and tossed him out of the chair towards the door. He stumbled a bit before catching himself on the door and shooting Spike an indignant look.

"Hey! That's Armani!" Andrew protested as he straightened his suit and walked up the stairs.

***

On the drive to Cleveland, Andrew had been able to more or less catch Spike up to speed on what they knew so far. The color commentary on his own life was a bit less than welcome, but Spike had refrained from socking him in the jaw so that was something.

So far, it seemed that slayers all over the world were having strange lapses in memory. It started with small things, forgetting they had called someone, forgetting to meet up for coffee. Small things. But lately, things had been getting significantly worse. Huge blocks of time - days, weeks, for some even months - had been lost. No one was sure why. The girls seemed more or less normal during the blackouts. As far as anyone could tell. But they had been getting more and more reports of the same phenomenon. Slayers were losing time. Andrew seemed cagey to say much more than that on the subject.

Willow was already in Cleveland where both Buffy and Faith were stationed. If something was going wrong with slayers, it seemed only logical that they'd both be feeling the effects. Although no one had been able to reach either of them for days.

Giles was already on a flight from London. Xander was apparently also on his way, not that Spike really gave a damn. Xander was all but useless in most cases. 

"So, anyone told Dawn?" Spike asked, breaking the silence that had fallen after Andrew had suggested a road game.

Andrew shook his head. Spike could almost say there was something like guilt there. 

"Why not?" Spike pressed. "Think she'd want to know if the big sis was in danger."

"Buffy didn't want Dawn involved in any of this stuff," Andrew replied. "We're just respecting her wishes."

"She's already involved," Spike muttered under his breath. "Not like there's an out for any of us now, is there?"

Andrew didn't respond to that last bit. Spike wasn't sure if he was just pretending he hadn't heard or if silence was his answer. Guess it was all the same.

The thought of seeing the gang again was... uncomfortable. He hadn't seen any of them besides Andrew since he had burned to ashes and been buried beneath the rubble of Sunnydale. They didn't know he was alive. She didn't know he was alive.

He had planned on telling her. Eventually. It just... he wasn't sure if fair was the right word. But it just didn't seem fair to barge back into her life. He was dead. They saved the world. He died. End of story. She was free to go off and live a semi-normal life with a normal guy. At least, that was the lie he told himself. The truth was always worse.

[angelinasway]

Regaining Hope

Chapter Six

Pairing: Clark Kent/Buffy Summers

Warnings/Triggers:Torture, Violence, Mention's of Major Character Death, Bad Language, Sexual Tension, Eventual Smut

Summary: Takes place during Man of Steel. When Buffy discovers the U.S Military trying to keep quiet about an object buried in a twenty thousand year old glacier, she immediately thinks the worst. However, when a surprise visit to the Canadian Arctic puts her in the path of a mysterious stranger her whole world is changed forever.

Previous Chapters: [Chapter One] [Chapter Two] [Chapter Three] [Chapter Four] [Chapter Five]

[TTH] [AO3] [FFN]

Authors Notes:Thank you all for you're amazing reviews. I never get tired of reading them. I just got to say I adored writing this chapter. It was so much fun and I loved the banter. I'm slowly falling in love with this couple the more I explore it. I should warn everyone that there's a subject that comes up that might offend some of you. I did not write this part to try to do that to anyone, so please don't take it seriously. It was more about showing Buffy's age and what some of us begin to contemplate as we get older. If Buffy was really only twenty-one it wouldn't be a topic that would come up, but I don't think its to far off the mark that a thirty-two year old Buffy would think these thing. Once again, a shout out and huge thanks to my amazing beta Hipkarma for being so insightful and just plain helpful while editing these chapters. I don't know what I would do without her.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable  characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners.  The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The  author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers  of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.

Chapter Six

Buffy awoke, as always right around eight. It didn’t matter where she was in the world, she always woke up around the same time every morning. Except, this morning happened to be very different because a large warm arm was wrapped firmly around her waist and a large thigh was wedged between her legs. She blinked in surprise as the night before came rushing back in surround sound and technicolor. From the moment Faith and Gunn woke them up having obnoxiously loud sex to when she first heard Clark moan. The deep baritone of the sound sending such a shock wave of lust straight to her core, she’d never felt anything like it and she was certain she couldn’t have stopped herself from touching him after that even if she tried.

God, he was built like brick wall. A very soft and warm brick wall, but a brick wall nonetheless. Training him was going to be difficult for that reason. She was incredibly strong but he was a hell of a lot stronger than her. Getting hit by him at full strength wasn’t really going to be an option. Though, she could always train him in her suit, which might actually give her a little bit of advantage against anything he threw at her. The suit itself was highly warded, to the point where she could probably get hit by a train and be able to walk it off. So that might actually be able to work, as long as he didn’t go for her head which unfortunately the full leather and Kevlar body suit did not cover. They could definitely work around that though.

 She bit her lip, remembering how good it felt to kiss him. It had been awkward at first, but he was an incredibly fast learner and eventually began to take the lead. Heat pooled in her belly at what came after though, the grinding and rubbing that ended in one of the best orgasms she ever had. He really was such a well-built man, everything about him was deceptively large from his broad shoulders to his thighs that were almost as big as tree trunks. Something she didn’t actually notice until she straddled him. The act itself had forced her legs farther apart than she was expecting. So, when he’d pulled her into his lap his cock was suddenly perfectly aligned against her clit, and boy did he feel big. Almost too big if she was being honest.

 The familiar throb of arousal hit her; her panties suddenly soaked. She vaguely remembered telling him after he got out of the shower that he looked ridiculous squashed up on her couch and to just share the bed. She was now slightly regretting that, because at this moment she wanted nothing more than to press herself back against the body currently cuddling her and grind her ass against the erection she felt poking her. ‘Yep, it was definitely time to get up.’

 She meant what she’d said earlier about not being ready for sex yet and she really did plan to stick to that. She wanted to get to know him first, find out what his likes and dislikes were, what his favorite movies were, hell even what his favorite color was. She truly did believe what Lorne had told her, but she craved the getting-to-know-you portion of the relationship process more than anything. It had been a long time since she had that. In fact, if she was being honest, she was pretty sure she never really had it.

 Angel had always hated talking about himself and she remembered very clearly spending a few hours researching him alone just to try and understand more about him. Unfortunately, back then Giles only had his pre-soul history, which probably should have been her first clue that embarking on any type of relationship with him was a bad idea. Riley had been different however, but when they started the relationship, they had both been keeping secrets. So, there had been big honesty issues there. Spike she hadn’t bothered getting to know, at least not before his soul. Oh, there were plenty of times she would slip up and ask him a question about himself, and even be cordial to him, but the personal stuff hadn’t come until those long nights spent together planning against The First. And, then again, after Angelus had killed Giles when she was basically a walking zombie. He would talk to her for hours even if she didn’t talk back just to try and snap her out of her desolation. He told her all about his life when he was human, and would even talk about some of the places he traveled with Dru. He never mentioned Angelus in those times, and she was grateful for that.

 It was in those moments that she realized why she and Spike meshed so well. He was very good at taking care of broken things and she was a very broken thing. He was created for it actually, and he needed to take care of her just as badly as she needed to be taken care of. She just hoped Clark could handle the task as well, because she had picked up a lot of the pieces of her shattered heart and soul and begun to paste them back together, but there were still several missing parts of herself that she had lost along the way. She was working on it and had been for awhile but she still had her moments of utter despair and moodiness. Buffy knew better than anyone how difficult she could be.

 She slowly tried to extract herself from his hold, but the arm that held her in place tightened. She heard a sleepy moan next to ear and then she felt his body stiffen as he came awake. Clark quickly removed his arm from around her waist and the knee that had wedged itself between her thighs and turned over on his back.

 “Sorry,” He murmured groggily.

 Buffy turned to face him, a slow smile spreading across her face as she propped her head up with her hand. He was blushing again and she found she rather enjoyed it. “I think we’re past accidental sleepy cuddling, don’t you?”

 A sleepy half smile crossed his lips at her words, "Mmm," he hummed. "So, that really did happen."

 She chuckled; he was absolutely adorable. "Unless we were sharing the same dream, I'm gonna go with a big uh-huh."

 His blue eyes met hers, and his smile stretched into a full grin. His hand reached up and he ran the back of it down her cheek.

 "Are you hungry?" He asked.

 She nodded. "I could definitely eat."

 He sighed. "We should probably get dressed then." 

 "Mmm," She agreed, rolling on her back and stretching her arms above her head. "Shower first though, and I should probably grab your clothes from yesterday out of the dryer."

 His hand reached out again, running it along the flat of her stomach. "You shower, I remember where the laundry room is. I'll get them."

 He sat up and then leaned down to kiss her, but she stopped him. "I have morning breath. I really don't think you want to do that before I brush my teeth."

 He chuckled and shook his head. "I honestly don't think I care," and then he was on her, his lips sliding against hers.

 She giggled, breaking the kiss and saying, "I think I created a monster."

 "Well, maybe you shouldn't have taken advantage of me last night." Clark said, a smirk forming on his lips.

 Buffy’s mouth dropped open, her eyes widening. "I did no such thing!" She said on a laugh.

 "Oh," he said, raising an eyebrow. "I think you did," and then he was kissing her again, sliding his tongue into her mouth before she could protest.

 The kisses suddenly turned much more serious and before she knew what she was doing her legs had wrapped around his waist and her arms were around his neck. She felt his hard length push against her and she moaned.

 "Mmm," He hummed, breaking the kiss. "I could get used to that sound."

His lips slid along her jawline, until he reached her neck where he placed a few wet kisses and then froze. He pulled away and Buffy’s eyes shot open. His eyes staring at her neck in a mixture horror and disbelief. 

 "Where...how did you get that?" He asked, his hand coming up to brush his thumb across her scar.

 Buffy's own hand came up and rubbed the area. "Vampire bite. Well, three to be exact." She saw a pained look flash across his eyes as his hand came up to cup her cheek. "What is it?" She asked.

 Clark shook his head, removing his hand and sitting back. "I just..." He sighed. "I can't help thinking how different your life might have been had I met you sooner." He looked away. “You’ve been through so much, some of it I read and some of it you told me.” He met her eyes, sadness and guilt shining in them, “And I’m guessing that’s only the half of it…and…and I can’t help thinking that I could have saved you from it all.”

 She felt her heart melt a little at his words. That was definitely up there with at least the top five sweetest things anyone ever said to her, but he shouldn’t be beating himself up for something that was out of his hands.

 She sighed sitting up, her hand reaching for his and entwining their fingers, bringing it into her lap. “As sweet as the sentiment is Clark, you can’t think like that.” She nodded, “Trust me, I’m the queen of blaming myself for things that are absolutely out of my control and the truth is, neither of us can know what would have happened had we met sooner.” She shrugged “I mean think about it. Sure, my life would have been easier but when the big stuff came up, I wouldn’t have been able to handle it as well, and do you honestly think I wouldn’t have jumped for Dawn?” She swallowed, “As shitty as the outcome was and even if I knew back then what I know now, I would do it again for her in a heartbeat.”

 “I know,” he whispered, looking down. “I just…what if I could have stopped you from having to jump at all?”

 She reached her free hand out, cupping his cheek, “Then I wouldn’t be who I am today. I would have never had the choice to take more power than I already had and have the strength and wherewithal to turn it down. I would have never found the Scythe and been able to use its power to activate the Slayers.” At Clark’s frown, she pulled away, getting off the bed and opened the closet. She unzipped her weapons bag and pulled out the Scythe.

 “This,” she said, showing him the weapon from when they first met. “It was made thousands of years ago by something called the Guardians. It was made for the first Slayer and she used it to drive the last Old One from this plain of existence. Then it was hidden until the day I found it. It’s the whole reason Willow was able to tap into the Slayer line and activate the girls. It’s incredibly powerful, and I can feel the power thrumming underneath my hand as we speak.” She put the Scythe back and walked over to him, placing her hand on his shoulder. “Kinda like you.”

 Clark swallowed. “What…what do I feel like?”

 “Powerful, almost overwhelmingly so,” she said honestly, sitting back on the bed. “But not evil or demonic. Those kinda things usually feel cold, like the temperature suddenly drops and the hairs on the back of my neck stand on end.” She gave him a small smile, “You feel warm, like I’ve been sunbathing for hours and my skin is that perfect mixture of overheated and sun kissed.”

 He brought his hand up, cupping her chin and rubbing his thumb along her lower lip. "And when I kiss you?"

 Buffy gasped, heat building in her belly. It took everything in her not to suck his thumb into her mouth. "If I answer that," she said breathily, "we won't ever make it to breakfast."

 He blew out a breath, closing his eyes and leaning his forehead against hers. "I've never felt so out of control in my life." He opened his eyes, meeting hers. "You...you make me want to lose control."

 "Is that a good thing or a bad thing?" She asked, her hand coming up to rub down his chest.

 "I honestly don't know," he sighed. "But it scares the hell out of me."

 "I'm sorry," she whispered.

 He kissed her then, his hand running into her hair before saying, "Don't be. I feel more alive than I have in years."

 "I think that makes two of us then." She said softly. "You're not the only one who feels out of control or alive." She paused, "And I think if I don't get in the shower soon, I don't think I can be held responsible for my next actions."

 He chuckled, pulling away. "Then you should probably take a shower," he said moving off the bed, "because I'm pretty sure you aren't alone in that either."

 Buffy laughed, "You sure you can find the laundry room, okay?"

 "I got it," he said, reaching out to stroke her cheek before grabbing his discarded sweats from last night, chucking them on and heading for the door.

 Buffy watched him go and then shook herself out of her daze. God, he had a fabulous back. Why had she not noticed it before? This was going to be incredibly hard if they were both feeling this way. She once again opened her closet grabbing what she needed for the day.

 ****<S>**<S>****

Clark raised an eyebrow, looking at her in amusement, "You really think this is a good idea?"

 She grinned, "No, but it’s cheap entertainment and they deserve it."

 They were standing in the hallway outside Faith and Gunn’s room. Buffy having the bright idea of getting back at the couple for their shenanigan’s the night before, because as she said, “This was a long time coming.”

 "Alright," he said chuckling. "Then hand me the bucket."

 "What...why?" She asked confused.

 Clark rolled his eyes, "Because I'm going to make the water colder."

 Buffy frowned. "Is this another ability you've yet to tell me about?"

 He looked at her innocently. “Maybe?”

 The look she gave him was both parts annoyed and pouty. “Okay Mr. Secret Keeper, who keeps secrets. Here,” she grumbled, shoving the quarter filled bucket into his arms.

 “I think you’ve been watching too much Harry Potter,” he said as seriously as he could, even though he knew it was obvious he was trying not to laugh.

She looked almost offended for a moment, “I have not!” A full-fledged pout finally broke out on her lips, “At least not willingly. Willow makes me watch it every year.” She sighed, “Then we get into an argument about if the Wizarding World is real or not in another dimension. It’s a thing.”

 He snorted, "You're joking."

 She rolled her eyes, "I wish," and then she shook her head. "Now hurry up, before they wake up."

 He grinned, blowing softly into the bucket and handing it back. "There, it should be cold enough now."

 She frowned at the water, reaching her hand into the bucket and touching it. Her eyes widened in surprise. 

 "Wow! That's like seriously impressive." She grinned, "This is gonna be so good." Buffy looked at him, "You ready?"

 At Clark’s nod, she said, "Alright, get ready to run." 

 He watched her take a step back and then her leg shot out, slamming into the door. The lock splintered and the door swung open, hitting the wall hard. Both Faith and Gunn shot up in alarm, suddenly alert and ready to fight.

 “Wakey, wakey!” Buffy yelled, before tossing the contents of the bucket on them.

 They both screamed when the ice water hit them. Their eyes widening in disbelief. Faith panted from the sudden shock of the water, looking at hers soaked tank top, her bed, and then Gunn before her eyes suddenly swung up to meet Buffy’s dancing ones. The look she gave them both could freeze over hell, it even managed to make Clark nervous enough to start backing up.

 “You. Are. So. Fucking. Dead!” She ground out, fury flashing in her eyes.

 “Run!” Buffy squealed, already pushing him down the hallway just as Faith shot out of bed. They were both through the living area and out the staff door in seconds, but Faith was fast and she was hot on their heels. The sound of her bare feet slapping against hardwood close behind them.

 As they approached the stairwell a giggling Buffy yelled, “Jump, no time for stairs.”

 Clark quickly launched himself over the banister, landing on the ground floor and turning just in time to see Buffy do the same. She landed on her feet and looked up in time to see a snarling Faith staring down at them, water still dripping from her hair and tank top.

 “You’re dead B!” She yelled.

 “What the hell!” Lisa said, coming around the corner a few of the girls hot on her heels just as Faith launched herself off the banister.

 Buffy was pushing Clark again and they slammed out the front door and into the cool morning air. He wrapped his arms around her just as Faith reached the door in only a tank top and boxers and shot them into the air just before she could reach them. Both of them broke into fits of hysterics when they heard her scream, “He can fucking fly!”

 “Wow,” Buffy said in between her giggles. “She’s really mad, isn’t she?”

 ****<S>**<S>****

 “Okay,” Buffy said, snagging a piece of bacon off his plate. “Favorite comedy?”

 They were in a restaurant not too far from the school. It was a very small establishment, but it was busy and the food smelt good. Buffy had recommended it to Clark, saying it was the best kept secret in Cleveland. It had taken them a little while to get a table, but now they were comfortably seated with two delicious looking breakfasts in front of them.

 They had been exchanging questions since they arrived at the restaurant. Simple things, from favorite colors, to places traveled, and now they were on to movies. Except Buffy had just stolen a piece of bacon off his plate without even asking, and it was done in such a way it almost felt domestic. Almost as if this was a completely normal occurrence and they had dined together hundreds of times.

 “Did you…did you just steal my bacon?” Clark said, raising an eyebrow.

 She blinked at him innocently, taking a bite of the salty goodness while holding back a smile, “Maybe.”

 He snorted, “Well, now I want a bite of your pancakes.”

 Buffy’s face broke into a grin, and she used her fork to cut him a piece of her strawberry and banana pancakes. Leaning over the table and holding out the bite to him, while using her other hand to protect the table from any syrup dripping.

 Clark leaned forward, wrapped his lips around the offered morsel and hummed as the sugary taste exploded on his tongue. He nodded, swallowing the bite before saying, “I should have gotten the pancakes.”    

 Buffy chuckled, cutting her own piece and taking a bite, her eyes rolling up at the homemade strawberry syrup. “I told you.” She said after swallowing. “This place has awesome pancakes for it being such a hole in the wall.”

 Clark cut into his eggs benedict and took a bite. “Mmm,” He hummed, pointing at his plate as he chewed and swallowed. “But this is very good too.”

 "What do you like better?" She asked.

 "Hmm," he said thinking. "Well, it’s not a very fair comparison. One’s sweet and one’s savory."

 "True," she acknowledged. "So, I guess the question should be, what do prefer sweet or salty?"

 He licked his lips. "That's actually a tough question. My mom is an excellent cook on both fronts, but I think if I had to choose it would be sweet. I love pie and she does make the best."

 She smiled softly, "She sounds pretty incredible."

 He nodded, "My parents couldn't have kids so them finding me was what she calls a miracle." He smiled, "When I was a kid and my abilities first started showing, she was the one who helped me control it. She taught me how to focus and block everything else out."

 "I have to admit, I'm a bit nervous about meeting her." She confessed shyly.

 He frowned in confusion, "Why?"

 Buffy shrugged, "Well, she raised you, didn’t she? Any woman capable of turning out a guy who so far has been one of the sweetest, most well-mannered men I’ve ever met, must have some superpowers of her own."

 He chuckled a blush spreading across his cheeks. "I'm sure she'll be thrilled to know that."

 Buffy grinned, shaking her head. "Anyway, back to our original topic. What's your favorite comedy?"

 "Hmm," He thought for a moment. "Well right now, I think it’s a toss-up between Talladega Nights and Step Brothers." He said, taking another bite of his breakfast.

 "Ah," she acknowledged. "A Ferrell fan. He is hilarious, but I myself would have to go with Sandler or Kevin Smith. I love Dogma and Fifty First Dates is probably my favorite romantic comedy."

 He shook his head, "I've never seen Dogma. Isn't that the one that makes fun of religion?"

 Buffy's mouth dropped open, "You've never seen it! Okay that's the first movie we are watching together,” Her cheeks suddenly pinkening as she cleared her throat and added. “And yes, it does make fun of religion but in a really unique way where it sends a good message too.” She shrugged, “I think I like it because of how well it rips the Bible apart as far as hypocrisy goes. I’m not very religious, but I mean I do believe there’s something. I don’t know if it’s all the Powers or God or what really, but there is definitely something beyond all this. However, the Bible is one of those things that gets used for evil, far more than it’s used for good. Plus, I’m living proof that some of the sins mentioned in the Bible are complete bullshit.”

 He raised an eyebrow, “Because you went to heaven.”

 She nodded, “Exactly. Let’s see,” she began to count off her sins on one hand. “Lying, I did a lot of that after I was called, also definitely did not honor my mother and father, I’ve taken the Lord’s name in vain on several occasions, I’ve stolen when I’ve had to, not for myself but for slaying.” She put her hand down. “Not to mention,” She whispered quietly. “I may have killed a few people who were after my sister back then, not intentionally of course but I’m pretty sure I killed at least one of them and I’m almost positive they were very human.” At Clark’s surprised frown she explained, “There were these, god I don’t even know a better way of describing it other than medieval knights charged with destroying the Key, and when we all tried to run, they attacked us.”

 “But wouldn’t that be considered self-defense?” He asked with a frown and then added, “And maybe you were allowed to go to heaven because of what you are?”

 Buffy snorted, “And how unfair is that. I get to go to heaven with the same kinda vague belief system as other people who live their lives with less red on their ledger than I have, but they don’t.” She shook her head. “It’s also kinda bullshit how no sin is greater than any other, or in Catholicism’s case it only applies to anyone in the church. I mean come on, I’ve heard of the Catholic church in particular, refusing to hold a funeral or allow burial over suicide, and yet they protect their pedophile priests like they are somehow above it all.” She sighed, a blush forming on her cheeks at her diatribe. “Sorry, I have many feelings about this particular subject.” She looked down, “I think that most religions have it wrong. It’s about our intents and choices, if we spend our lives at least trying to do good, no matter if we fall along the way or not, we have a place in heaven. If we however let the darkness that is always around us, whether we know it’s there or not, consume us, then we let ourselves be corrupted. If we begin to enjoy the pain and suffering, we as humans are quite capable of causing all on our own, I think that’s when we become hell bound.” She took a drink of her juice, meeting his eyes again, before adding. “I’m sorry if you’re religious and I offended you. I sometimes forget that not everyone thinks the same way I do.”

 He smiled softly. She was really cute when she was passionate about something. He couldn’t really help playing devil’s advocate to watch that spark in her eyes as she got indignant over the topic of religion, but it had gone on long enough. He was trying to enjoy this moment, not offend her.

 “I’m not,” He clarified. “I honestly don’t know what I believe. My dad and mom had me baptized as Presbyterian, but I think my dad might have stopped believing after they found me. My mom probably did too, but she would never admit it.”

 Buffy frowned, “Then why–”

 “Because I’m an alien Buffy,” He shook his head. “Neither of them knew where I was from or what I was. I looked human, but they both knew I wasn’t.” He shrugged, “I think they did it to teach me right from wrong the only way they really understood how. The same way their parents taught them.” He shook his head, “It wasn’t only that though, my dad used stories, his own life stories to drill into me how important it was that I always made the better choice, because for someone like me, losing my temper isn’t really an option if it’s going to hurt someone.” He sighed, “As for religion, I used to wonder why God would make me this way until my dad told me the truth. It’s very hard for me to worship a god that had no hand in my creation. In fact, I stopped going to church because I just felt like an imposter.”

 Her eyes softened at his words and she reached her hand across the table and entwined their fingers. “You aren’t an imposter, Clark. I may not be religious, but I absolutely believe in destiny and the prophecy proves you were meant to be here. That somewhere in the ether the Powers or whoever, saw your soul and found it important enough to send a vision to some unsuspecting seer here on Earth.” She smiled, “No matter what happens, don’t ever feel you don’t belong here.”

 “Yeah, for what purpose still remains to be seen.” He said, frowning slightly.

 Buffy frowned, “I thought your dad said–”

 Clark shook his head, “I’m not talking about why my parents sent me here, I’m talking about the prophecy.”

 Understanding suddenly came into her eyes and she sighed, “I’ll try to work on Wes for you, okay? I know it’s frustrating but I don’t think he’s keeping it from us because he’s trying to be malicious or hoard information.” She nodded, “I do believe he’s genuinely trying to protect us, but I’m also not stupid enough to believe that’s the only reason.”

 He looked at her surprised by her admission as he watched her take a bite of her pancakes. “What…what do you mean?”

 Buffy swallowed and licked the syrup off her lips, using her napkin to dab up the excess. “Honestly, I think they’re trying to protect me from myself. Willow said it herself that day in the ship. There’re some things in it that would seriously wig me. Lorne said we’re soulmates, and I believe him, but it’s more than soulmates and I think you feel it too.” She raised her eyebrow at him. “If the prophecy say’s that we are destined in some way and they told me, there’s a very good chance we would not be sitting here right now because I would constantly be second guessing my feelings. At least that’s what they probably think.”

 Clark studied her. She really was impressive, he found himself admiring her the more they got to know each other. “You already knew though, didn’t you?”

 “I guessed it might be that in the ship, when Willow said what she said. Earlier that day when you were in my trailer and you left your poem.” Buffy smirked, “Clever by the way.” She said, looking at him appraisingly, before adding, “When you passed me, I felt something I’ve never felt before, it was like I was on fire. It was so powerful that even Hardy noticed my reaction and I was definitely not trying to draw attention to you.”

 “Oh yes,” Clark acknowledged. “I remember over hearing that conversation.” He smirked at her, “What was it that you called me? Oh yeah, a well-built redneck with puppy eyes.” Watching her cheeks bloom with color was completely worth bringing it up.

  “In my defense,” she said, embarrassment shining in her eyes. “I was trying to get him off your back.” Then she frowned in realization, “Seriously, you can hear that far?”

 “I can hear anything on earth if I focus,” He admitted, her eyes widening in surprise. “When I was a kid and it first happened, it was like hearing everything at once. I thought I was going crazy.”

 Her eyes softened. “That must have been horrible.”

 “It was, and scary. I remember how scared I was.” He met her eyes as he thought about her admitting she already suspected that the prophecy said they were destined. “Can I ask you something?” At her nod, he continued, “Last night you said you usually fight things like this and even your friends thought you would freak-out. Why aren’t you fighting it?”

 Her eyes dulled somewhat at the question and she pushed the few remaining bites she had around with her fork. “Honestly,” She paused, looking down at her food. “Honestly, I’m lonely.” She admitted. “I haven’t had this type of connection in years and it feels good.” She met his eyes then a blush staining her cheeks, “I thought about it and decided if the Powers are gonna give me something as beautiful as you after all the crap I’ve been through, then I was okay with that. Even this, just us talking and getting to know each other is more than I’ve had as far as romance goes in…I don’t even know how long. I had no idea how much I needed this kind of thing until I met you.”

 Heat filled his cheeks at her words and their eyes remained locked on each other’s for what felt like a long time. Clark reached his hand across the table and placed it on hers.

"If it makes you feel any better, I've never felt like anything like this before." He sighed, "I had no idea something as simple as eating breakfast with a beautiful woman, who I don't have to hide from, could feel so good."

 Buffy smiled softly, "We are a pair, aren't we?"

 He chuckled, and nodded. "That we are."

 Buffy’s cell phone rang the next second, her eyes glancing at the caller ID and widening in horror. "Shit," she hissed.

 "What... what is it?" Clark asked in alarm.

 "It's Dawn." She responded, staring at the phone.

 He raised an eyebrow, "And that's a bad thing?"

 "If Faith called her and mentioned you, yeah it could be bad." She answered, not taking her eyes off the phone.

 "You don't think Faith would tell her what I am do you." Clark said, worry lacing his voice.

 Buffy shook her head, "No, she's not that stupid. But I could see her hinting that you are something other as revenge for this morning." She sighed, "Which would just put my sister in a panic."

 The phone luckily stopped ringing and Clark watched Buffy sigh in relief, only to have it melt away when her text message chime went off.

 He watched her look at the message as the color drained from her face. "Shit!" She said again.

 "What does it say?" He asked nervously.

 "She said that if I don't pick up the phone, she's gonna show up here, and that I have five minutes." Buffy looked at him nervously and sighed. "Sometimes I really wish we didn't show her how to use her keyness, because unfortunately she's not bluffing."

 She looked at him apologetically, "You're about to get the full of Dawn in rant mode, so prepare yourself."

 Buffy dialed the number and squeezed her eyes shut as the other line connected and it was answered after the first ring.

“Hello, my beautiful and wonderful sister who doesn’t even bother to let me know she’s back in the amazing U.S. of A.” The sarcasm in the voice alone told Clark that Buffy was about to be chewed out.

 “Dawn,” Buffy started, but was cut off immediately.

 “So, my dearest sister, Buffy…you mind telling me why my husband is about to send one of his crew members out to fix the door and rent a fan to dry the bed in Faith’s and Gunn’s room?” An extremely sarcastic female voice said over the phone. “Or better yet, who’s this new recruit you’re getting so chummy with…hmm? Also, why the hell didn’t you tell me you were back in the states and not call!”

 Buffy shifted uncomfortably in her chair, and Clark bit back his amusement, he had no siblings so this was somewhat fascinating for him. Buffy met his eyes and glared at the amusement dancing there. “Just you wait.” She mouthed, which made his nervousness skyrocket.

 “Sorry Dawn,” She sighed. “I should have called, but I had just gotten out of quarantine and Wes was real big on me getting in touch with the new recruit.”  

“Uh-uh, you don’t get to deflect like that, because Faith already told me. He felt more powerful than she has felt in long time, but she won’t tell me what he is.” There was a moment of pause before an exasperated tone came over the line. “So, what is he Buffy?”

 “It’s not what you–” she started, but Dawn cut her off.

 “If you tell me it’s not what I think I will show up there in the middle of Breakers Breakfast, I don’t care how busy it is, now spill!” Buffy’s little sister demanded.

 Buffy looked at him and swallowed, “Seriously, this is not the time nor place to start talking about this.”

 “He’s there, isn’t he?” Came her sister’s reply.

 Buffy’s eyes widened, before quickly blurting, “Have you talked to Wes?”

 Dawn paused, “Should I?”

 ‘Well, this was mostly his idea.” Buffy answered.

 “So, Wes is okay with you boinking another demon?” Her sister’s indignant tone came over the line.

 “First off,” Buffy growled, making Clark look around to see if anybody was listening. “I haven’t boinked anybody,” she said lowly. “Secondly, he’s not a demon, and third, when the hell did you turn into mom!”

 “Maybe when I became a mother.” Dawn said exasperated. “Now give him the phone so I can give him the usual sisterly threats so he can know exactly what kinda hell he’ll reap if he hurts you.”

 “Dawn,” Buffy warned.

 “Do you actually think I won’t show up there.” Her sister countered.

 Buffy’s eyes looked at him apologetically, and he saved her the humiliation of having to ask by holding out his hand. She sighed gratefully and handed him the phone.

 “Hello,” Clark greeted.

 “Now you listen here bub,” was the first thing she said. “I don’t really care what you are but if you do anything to hurt my sister, I will open a vein and send you to Quor’toth, do you understand?”

 Clark cleared his throat. “I have no intention–”

“Of course you don’t,” She interrupted. “They never do. Now put me back on with my sister.” He blinked in surprised and shrugged, handing her back the phone.

 “I think your threat was kinda lost on him, Dawn.” Buffy said in amusement, looking at a confused Clark. “I really don’t think he knows what Quor’toth is.”

 “Well maybe you should tell him,” Came the snarky reply over the line. “Anyway, you better give me a phone call when you can talk in private, after the kids, me and Xand’s sex life isn’t exactly popping. So, I wanna know everything.”

 A blush spread over Buffy’s cheeks, “There’s really nothing to tell Dawn.”

 “Liar,” Dawn countered.

 Buffy rolled her eyes. “Fine, I’ll call you in a few hours.”

 ****<S>**<S>****

 They had stopped by the school to grab the rest of Clark’s things before he went home. Buffy giving him an extra backpack she had lying around to store them in. Thankfully, both Gunn and Faith were out, so they didn’t have to deal with any unwanted confrontations.

 “What time does your flight get in tomorrow?” Clark asked, adjusting the strap on the backpack.

 “1000…I mean Ten in the morning.” She answered.

 “Do you want me to pick you up?” He asked.

 She smiled shyly, “Only if you want to, but there will be quite a lot to do before we can make it to Smallville.”

 “Such as?” He asked, stepping closer and brushing a strand of hair behind her ear. Not really knowing how to stop himself from touching her since he knew he wouldn’t see her again until tomorrow.

 “Well,” she said, stepping closer. “I’ve gotta open the safehouse and get you a keycard to get in.” She reached her hand up her fingers running along the seam of his outer shirt. “There will probably be some sort of contract as far as payment for helping us goes, that I’ll need to print out.”

 “Payment?” He asked, confused.

 Buffy nodded, “Of course, If you help us stop an apocalypse or go on a mission with a bunch of Slayers, you get paid. The amount however, depends on how serious a situation it is.” She looked at him softly, “You didn’t actually think we would ask you to do any of this without some sort of compensation, did you?”

 He looked away and shrugged. “I honestly didn’t think about it.”

 She smiled, “You really are the sweetest guy I’ve ever met.”

 When he met her eyes, she had moved even closer, but this time he wasn’t scared. His arms immediately wrapped around her and he lowered his head and brushed her lips softly, not taking it any farther than that. He leaned his head against hers and whispered. “I wish I didn’t have to go yet.”

 “Me too.” She admitted, “But it’s okay, we’ll see each other tomorrow.” Then her eyes brightened and she pulled away. “I almost forgot, I got you this.” She reached in her back pocket and pulled out a cellphone. “Here.”

 “That way, you can call me if you get bored.” She blushed.

 He grinned taking the phone from her hand. “Thank you. I definitely will,” and then he sighed as he put the phone in the backpack. “I definitely need to go, my mom’s probably already worried since I didn’t come home last night.”

 “Of course.” Buffy said, smiling sadly, “I’ll see you tomorrow.”

 Clark leaned forward and they kissed one last time, before he stepped back and shot into the air, looking below at the girl who was slowly changing his world.

[ireadyabooks]

Books to Read After Watching Julie and the Phantoms

By Mackenzie Cutruzzula

First things first...

If you’re anything like me you haven’t been able to get the songs from Julie and the Phantoms out of your head. Whether you love music, a good ghost story, or a little bit of both, these books are on the edge of great.

Julie and the Phantoms: The Edge of Great by Micol Ostow (On Sale December 29)

After the passing of her mom, Julie has lost her passion for music and is on the verge of being kicked out of her performing arts high school. That is, until she makes the ultimate comeback with her new band, Julie and the Phantoms. There’s only one catch: all of her bandmates are ghosts. 

Back in the 1990s, Luke, Reggie, and Alex were on the cusp of rock stardom with their band, Sunset Curve, before an unfortunate encounter with Los Angeles street food brought their rock band dreams—and lives—to an end. Now, with Julie as their lead singer, the guys have a second chance to make it big and to help Julie discover the real power of music. 

This novel based on Season 1 of the hit Netflix series is told in alternating points of view and include a full-color photo insert and exclusive story content not seen on the show!

If you love the music of Julie and the Phantoms try these reads:

P.S. I Like You by Kasie West

While spacing out in Chemistry class, Lily scribbles some of her favorite song lyrics onto her desk. The next day, she finds that someone has continued the lyrics on the desk, and added a message to her. Soon, Lily and her anonymous pen pal are exchanging full-on letters -- sharing secrets, recommending bands, and opening up to each other. Lily realizes she's kind of falling for this letter writer. Only who is he? As Lily attempts to unravel the mystery, and juggle school, friends, crushes, and her crazy family, she discovers that matters of the heart can't always be spelled out...Kasie West brings irresistible wit, warmth, and sparkle to this swoon-worthy story of love showing up when you least expect it.

Turn It Up by Jen Calonita

The Nightingales are in a serious funk. Bradley Academy's all-girl a cappella group used to be the pride of the sunshine state, but the Nightingales have recently fallen out of harmony. Best friends and co-captains Lidia Sato and Sydney Marino haven't been speaking ever since a boy came between them. And not just any boy-none other than Griffin Mancini, the lead singer of Bradley Academy's smug all-boy a capella group, the Kingfishers.The Nightingales have no chance of making it to the big state final if their captains are at each other's throats. Their only hope is new girl Julianna Ramirez. But in addition to her serious pipes, she has some serious stage fright.The Nightingales will have to come together if they want to shine at the upcoming competition and restore the group to its former glory.

K-Pop Confidential by Stephen Lee

When Candace Park secretly enters a global audition held by the same music label that made the K-pop boy band SLK famous, the last thing she expects is to actually get a coveted spot in their trainee program. And convincing her strict parents to let her to go is all but impossible ... although it's nothing compared to what comes next. Under the strict supervision of her instructors at the label's headquarters in Seoul, Candace must perfect her performance skills to within an inch of her life, learn to speak Korean fluently, and navigate the complex hierarchies of her fellow trainees, all while following the strict rules of the industry. Rule number one? NO DATING, which becomes impossible to follow when she meets a dreamy boy trainee. And in the all-out battle to debut, Candace is in danger of planting herself in the middle of a scandal lighting up the K-pop fandom around the world.

Kill the Boy Band by Goldy Moldavsky

Just know from the start that it wasn't supposed to go like this. All we wanted was to get near them. That's why we got a room in the hotel where they were staying. We were not planning to kidnap one of them. Especially not the most useless one. But we had him-his room key, his cell phone, and his secrets. We were not planning on what happened next. We swear.

Muted by Tami Charles (On Sale February 2, 2021)

For seventeen-year-old Denver, music is everything. Writing, performing, and her ultimate goal: escaping her very small, very white hometown. So Denver is more than ready on the day she and her best friends Dali and Shak sing their way into the orbit of the biggest R&B star in the world, Sean "Mercury" Ellis. Merc gives them everything: parties, perks, wild nights -- plus hours and hours in the recording studio. Even the painful sacrifices and the lies the girls have to tell are all worth it. Until they're not. Denver begins to realize that she's trapped in Merc's world, struggling to hold on to her own voice. As the dream turns into a nightmare, she must make a choice: lose her big break, or get broken. Inspired by true events, Muted is a fearless exploration of the dark side of the music industry, the business of exploitation, how a girl's dreams can be used against her -- and what it takes to fight back.

Spin by Lamar Giles

When rising star Paris Secord (aka DJ ParSec) is found dead on her turntables, it sends the local music scene reeling. No one is feeling that grief more than her shunned pre-fame best friend, Kya, and ParSec's chief groupie, Fuse -- two sworn enemies who happened to be the ones who discovered her body. The police have few leads, and when the trail quickly turns cold, the authorities don't seem to be pushing too hard to investigate further. But nobody counted on Paris's deeply loyal fans, ParSec Nation, or the outrage that would drive Fuse and Kya to work together. As ParSec Nation takes to social media and the streets in their crusade for justice, Fuse and Kya start digging into Paris's past, stumbling across a deadly secret. With new info comes new motives. New suspects. And a fandom that will stop at nothing in their obsessive quest for answers, not even murder...

If you love the ghosts in Julie and the Phantoms and are looking for something a little spooky, try these reads:

City of Ghosts by Victoria Schwab

Ever since Cass almost drowned (okay, she did drown, but she doesn't like to think about it), she can pull back the Veil that separates the living from the dead . . . and enter the world of spirits. Her best friend is even a ghost. So things are already pretty strange. But they're about to get much stranger. When Cass's parents start hosting a TV show about the world's most haunted places, the family heads off to Edinburgh, Scotland. Here, graveyards, castles, and secret passageways teem with restless phantoms. And when Cass meets a girl who shares her "gift," she realizes how much she still has to learn about the Veil -- and herself. And she'll have to learn fast. The city of ghosts is more dangerous than she ever imagined.

All the Crooked Saints by Maggie Stiefvater

Any visitor to Bicho Raro, Colorado, is likely to find a landscape of dark saints, forbidden love, scientific dreams, miracle-mad owls, estranged affections, one or two orphans, and a sky full of watchful desert stars. At the heart of this place you will find the Soria family, who all have the ability to perform unusual miracles. And at the heart of this family are three cousins longing to change its future: Beatriz, the girl without feelings, who wants only to be free to examine her thoughts; Daniel, the Saint of Bicho Raro, who performs miracles for everyone but himself; and Joaquin, who spends his nights running a renegade radio station under the name Diablo Diablo. They are all looking for a miracle. But the miracles of Bicho Raro are never quite what you expect.

Cemetery Boys by Aiden Thomas

Bestowed by the ancient goddess of death, Yadriel and the gifted members of his Latinx community can see spirits: women have the power to heal bodies and souls, while men can release lost spirits to the afterlife. But Yadriel, a trans boy, has never been able to perform the tasks of the brujas - because he is a brujo. When his cousin suddenly dies, Yadriel becomes determined to prove himself a real brujo. With the help of his cousin and best friend Maritza, he performs the ritual himself, and then sets out to find the ghost of his murdered cousin and set it free. However, the ghost he summons is not his cousin. It's Julian Diaz, the resident bad boy of his high school, and Julian is not about to go quietly into death. He's determined to find out what happened and tie off some loose ends before he leaves. Left with no choice, Yadriel agrees to help Julian, so that they can both get what they want. But the longer Yadriel spends with Julian, the less he wants to let him leave.

The Ghost and the Goth by Stacey Kade

After a close encounter with a bus, Alona Dare goes from homecoming queen to Queen of the Dead. She’s stuck as a ghost in the land of the living with no sign of the big, bright light to take her to a better place. To make matters worse, the only person who might be able to help her is Will Killian, a total loser outcast. More than anything, Will wishes he didn’t have the rare ability to communicate with the dead, especially the former mean girl of Groundsboro High. He’s not filling out any volunteer forms to help her cross to the other side, though it would bring him some welcome peace and quiet. Can they get over their mutual distrust -- and quasi-attraction -- to work together? Readers of this spirited paranormal comedy won't want this odd couple to ever part.