#get to know your mutuals.

[c-sand]

getting to know your mutuals 💁🏽‍♀️

thank you to @stelly38 for tagging me 🥰 i am very slow 🧍🏽‍♀️

what is the origin of your blog title: my blog title is "that's a beautiful thing to do" and it comes from the line, "you waited for me...that's a beautiful thing to do." which is in a movie called "a crime" from 2006, starring norman reedus. my blog is whatever i'm obsessed with in the moment (obvi lolol) and for a long while there i was mostly a walking dead blog and me and all my friends on here were obsessed with watching norman's absolutely bonkers filmography. anyway his character is a man called vincent, who's wife is murdered by a taxi driver (??) (it's been awhile idklol) and his neighbor is in love with him. and she waits for him ect ect. apparently i made gifs of the scene. (and good god, look at those old gifs 💀💀)

why is this my blog title? i literally couldn't say. i liked the line and whenever i went to change it, it looked weird with it gone. it's the same thing as my icon. i can't change it from ariel, it looks wrong 😂

otp(s) + shipnames: good god, buckle up 😩 (all of my main ones are probably on my ship edit list in my navigation, so people can look there.) but, for a general breakdown, i guess i'll start with the ones people know this blog for best:

jon snow x sansa stark (jonsa): my great loves.

the best fic, the best vibes. the complimentary arcs. the longing gazes and heavy breathing in full view other people? when they absolutely shouldn't be longingly gazing and heavily breathing in full view of other people?? because, um, they think they're siblings?? like...these two gotta calm down, it's borderline indecent.

i've never in my life read more meta for a ship and most are just brilliant. the way that these two echo each other throughout the story (both show and book) is just stunning and, because we don't actually have them in the books, yet (george, george please) just the imagined potentials of how they might interact and grow together in the original format is just so fun. (well, tragic and trauma, but fun.)

there's more elegant and substance built things to say, but for this i'll just say: perfection. y'all know how i feel about jon and sansa.

daryl dixon x beth greene (bethyl): the foundation.

again, the walking dead was my first legit fandom hold, here on tumblr dot com. like, all of my followers came from this era lmaoo. when i say daryl and beth are the foundation, i mean, like, at one point there were six of us in this fandom. people probably existed outside of tumblr, but on this hellsite there started with six of us and i actively remember us choosing what name to go with for their ship name andfdklsgkdfljghfdk. (i did have a soft spot for deth 😂😂)

i've never been a member of team d. (but, hey, shoutout to team d! 👋🏽) but, i legitimately sobbed during her last episode. it was so out of nowhere and so poorly done and i was absolutely miserable lmaoo. and i still solidly believe that these two are soulmates and should have been the next couple on the show. and that bitch ass robert kirkman destroyed everything 😀

buffy summers x spike (spuffy): don't even get me started.

legitimately, do not get me started. these are a foundation of my soul, to be quite honest. like... i think almost my whole life? has been spent loving spike and buffy??

this dynamic is so wild and complex. buffy summers and spike, individually, are two of my favorite characters of all time. (actually all of these ships are top characters, for me, which probably shows why i've loved them for so long). i feel like spike and buffy is not a ship for the weak, like, it's not all sunshine and rainbows. there is a lot of rain. but the journey they go on from enemies, to reluctant allies, to friends, to enemies, to friends, to lovers, to enemies, to friends, to soulmates. it's a ride. it's a long ride.

and very few ships could go through this arc, especially the low points of their relationship, and come out on the other side still being evvvvvvvverything. and they are. everything.

klaus mikaelson and caroline forbes (klaroline): don't piss me off.

the vampire diaries (and the originals following right along behind it) piss me right off 😂😂😂😂

this is another perfect example of literal gold in the writers hands that was absolutely squandered. a girl who no one ever puts first and is desperate for a boy to see her and choose her -- to pick her first -- meets an over a thousand year vampire who sees her and instantly falls at her feet. gold. perfection. absolutely thrown to the side for (coughs) mediocre replacements. (i love stefan, but boy, get someone elSE!)

i'll never forget that forest scene. to both win and lose in one fell swoop 😩😩 insanity.

jess mariano and rory gilmore (literati): okay, now this? this c-sand origin story.

i could scream. i could cry. rory and jess are simultaneously the greatest thing in the world and the absolute worst. my greatest love and my greatest trauma 😭😭 they're another lifer ship, for me. but, they also suffer from one of my most hated writers paths: incredible build up and subsequent back burner.

watching the build up of their feelings for each other; from his introduction in season two, to early mid season three -- it's so well done. they're obsessed with each other!! i'm obsessed with them!!!! dean gets to suffer!!!! and then they finally get together (in an absolutely iconic episode) and the writers then regulate their entire relationship to primarily off screen interactions 🧍🏽‍♀️🧍🏽‍♀️ we are simply told they're really great together and spend all of their time together, being a good relationship. before it's decided that "actually, jess could probably lead a spin off show" and they tank the whole relationship by making him essentially stop talking to her. and they do it on screen.

when you tell us they're great for their whole relationship, but don't show us them actually dating, and then SHOW US it falling apart -- it gives the impression it was a terrible relationship the whole time and it waSN'T.

(and it's so sad, because it's her only relationship where they decide to not actually...show the....relationship, once they together. hate asp for that.)

frank castle and karen page (kastle): i swear to god, if these two don't ever get together, i'm gonna jump.

first off, i run the @kastlenetwork, so that should probably give you an idea and what's going down with me. so.

daredevil: born again is about to drop and if these two. don't. interact. i need more longing looks. i need matt to hear their hearts racing. i need frank castle to stop being a punk and pushing my girl away. i'll keep this short. love them. i run a network 😂😂😂

ross poldark and demelza poldark (romelza): welcome to the club!

a new addition to my addictions. shout out to this beautiful walking perfection, that is demelza poldark and her husband ross, who i often want to punch in the face, but still love despite that. god, he pisses me off, but, he always brings me back in. the power of a dumbo man, i guess 😩 i barreled through this entire show in an embarrassingly short time.

if only this man could realize he has literally ZERO chemistry with a woman named elizabeth, the ship would have a lot smoother of a sail.

aragorn x eowyn (arawyn): i'll fight someone, i do not care.

i do not care. love arwen. love faramir. lovely. love those relationships. swell. aragorn and eowyn? this is it. i live in a whole other world where this is what thrives and i can be happy 🥰

💗there's so many more, like sookie and eric, jackie and hyde, lucy and flynn, zuko and katara, declan o'hara and me. but, i am rambling oh my god.💗

favorite color: my favorite colors and green, pink, purple, and brown probably.

song stuck in your head: the other day, i remembered that i like mumford and sons.

and also:

weirdest habit/trait: ummm, this is the kind of question that i have no clue how to answer. i feel like nothing i do is weird, even if it is to other people. anything i do feels normal, to me idk.

hobbies: trying to read and not take eighty months to finish my book. fluffing around in photoshop making sets. watching movies/tv -- my sister bought me a projector screen for christmas, so i watch everything huge. trying and failing to paint nail art onto myself.

something you're good at: maybe baking. sort of painting, i guess. not talking to people. pretending to laugh when members at my job think they're being hilarious.

something you collect: good pens, physical media of movies and shows that i love. apparently game of thrones funko pops, as long as they're jon or sansa. one sided enemies and rivals.

something you forget: the sentence i was about to say. the thing i was about to google, two seconds prior. the one thing i reminded myself that i needed, at the grocery store.

what's your love language: i guess acts of service, idk 😂😂

favorite movie/show: legitimately impossible.

avatar the last airbender

gilmore girls

bleach

lord of the rings/the hobbit

poldark

buffy the vampire slayer

smallville

that 70's show

friday night lights

the walking dead (seasons 1-4)

greek

game of thrones

house

moulin rouge

on and on and on

favorite animal:

cats. house cats. big cats.

giraffes

monkeys

bears

what were you like as a child: probably more talkative, i'm sure.

favorite subjects in school: art and english.

least favorite subjects in school: all math classes.

best character trait: ummmmmmmmmmmmmm

worst character trait: probably my disinterest in other people's liveskjdhfjkaldhfkdshfkjh like, if my coworkers keep going on and on about the same things, every day, all day -- i just totally zone out. couldn't be bothered.

if you could change any detail of your life right now, what would it be?: the list is endless.

if you could travel in time, who would you like to meet?: the idea of having to expel energy for time travel, at this precise moment, makes me want to go to die.

(this is the part where i say i have no clue who to tag, umm @esther-dot @riahchan @carry-the-sky @onhersleeve @consultingviking idk, you can do it or not 😂💗)

[ispyspookymansion]

before you reply or add a rb comment to a tumblr post, ask yourself, is it DOPE?

D- DIRECTED AT OP: is it replying to OP, the only person who will be notified of what you say other than the immediate prev rb, or is it to someone else way back in the rb chain? if so, dont fucking say it oh god you are talking to the wrong person

O - ORIGINAL: has it been said in the notes already? repeatedly? take a look. for the love of god

P - PERSONAL (OVERLY): dont be fucking weird. again. op is a person on the other end who is gonna see this.

E - EVEN REMOTELY NECESSARY: will anyone give a shit. Do you need to say this. could this be a tag. OR could this be a new post separated from the one youre looking at. could this stay a thought in your beautiful mind.

[vaguely-concerned]

lucanis is a 'I could sit in our quiet kitchen on a grey tuesday afternoon drinking coffee and talking with you about nothing much in particular forever and be the happiest man who ever lived' romantic, not a 'classic tropes and grand gestures' romantic. this is a distinction and conceptual gap I personally feel is crucial to understanding what's going on with him when romanced. for all his almost painful sincerity and clear depth of feeling he's not a very effusive guy by nature, but in the history of time no one has ever, with their whole soul, chest and being, been so genuinely and openly happy to just do laundry and taxes with you.

[astradyke]

dan howell so silly. hi i have beautiful hair and these freckles i got from my holiday with my partner who i look at all the time like he put the stars in the sky. i'd be beside him even if it was the apocalypse btw. hes so weird he keeps spitting on me oh hey look a microphone let me [not typing this out sorry]. looks like everything worked out in the end. i dont think anybody else has ever been in love like ive been in love like seriously he's best friend but more than friends, he's a piece of furniture, we're soulmates, we're each others only friend, he's phil, he's phil, hi i'm phil- no sorry he's phil i'm dan. he's bub. he's philip michael lester. he's dear. he's idiot. sometimes im dressed up in a sexy nun persona but please dont ship her with blonde phil hes taken. i dont know the difference between moles and bats. i keep talking about having sex with my clone but i will flip the hypothetical to talk about murder so i dont ask phil live on video if hed have sex with his clone . i have the most beautiful baby doe eyes. so i said scooby doo had a gender discovery arc but that might actually just be me sorry. guys i promise i top. i came back to this collab space and im actually having quite a nice time. ok phil fine you win this game. its so lucky to find someone you can be that compatible with. hi its mare again im no longer roleplaying as daniel howell i didn't actually mean for the post to get this long. does anyone want to play wolves

[vaaaaaiolet]

Your writing is so superb , but I would appreciate it if you could recommend other Leon Kennedy fan fiction blogs you think are as superb as your work.💛

AWWW GOSH 😭 you're too sweet :)

what i CAN do for you is recommend some very fantastic authors (in no particular order) who i look up to immensely 🫶 and rest assured they're far more skilled than i am so you'll def find a new fic to love in their masterlists!!

please be respectful when perusing their work and don't bother them with asks to write leon fic bc many of them have moved to other fandoms :) and mind their dnis!!

@miss-oranje-disco-dancer (masterlist):

never penelope, always calypso haunts me enough that i've written shitty poetry to cope about it in my SPARE TIME, liz's angst is that good. her writing packs a sucker punch every time without mincing words and her attention to detail never misses!!!

@uhlunaro (resi masterlist):

a tale of grief in ten parts is literally what made me start writing. leon's (hell, every resi character's) characterization is FLAWLESS in ro's fics. using my full chest to say i've cried to their writing multiple times yeah what about it🧍‍♀️

@crsssie (leon masterlist):

nobody does a delicious back-and-forth dialogue like cressie :3 you'll either be crying of laughter or punching your screen wishing it was leon (in the best way). that racer leon au you've been seeing? she pretty much invented it. and in 20k words no less.

@sweeterthanficstion (masterlist):

if you've ever wanted to taste sunshine in writing form, YOU'VE FOUND YOUR GIRL!! with her soothing flow and fairytale prose, amber's writing always has me blushing and crushing like the first time i laid eyes on leon <3

@inkonparchment (masterlist):

ink is leonblr's classics author and we are spoiled BADDD with her writing!! her leon is just as - if not more - charming as a jane austen male lead. give class of '95 (or any of her fics) a read and invest in a fainting couch for when you swoon ;)

@byexbyez (masterlist in pinned):

ronnie writes like a freaking renaissance painter. you WILL feel everything with all 5 senses in her prose. i found her through love me more in '23 and it STUCK WITH ME until '24 when she finished it like a NOVEL in both length and quality. she's that good.

@mandalhoerian (resi masterlist):

HOOOOO BOY. you know the "hide them from mappa" meme. apply that to shai but with publishers bc her prose deserves to be BOUND IN GOLD AND LEATHER and WE OUGHT TO PAY TO READ IT. come prepared with kleenex. trust me.

@comatosebunny09 (masterlist):

some of the DREAMIEST writing i’ve ever read. i highly rec lighting candles and going over her leon musings as self care bc YOU DESERVE IT. more often than not i read bunny’s work only to end up taking notes 😭

@uncouth-the-fifth (resi masterlist):

she is MAGIC!! user uncouth's prose reads like MOVIE SCENES i'm not kidding. please give her leon works a go bc they far surpass mine in their worldbuilding, narrative voice, and just in general. her leon is so very real and dear to my heart <3

[fairly-odd-takes]

Ik its not a confession, but I know a bunch of ppl are on here, and I want to spread it as much as possible

If you have paramount LOCK IN because if we don't get a season two I'm rioting /silly

.

[gauntletgirlie]

Get to know your Mutuals

Thanks for the tag @perlen-gold, even though I’m just an unhinged follower obsessed with your writing 🙈 I started my own chain so your original post wouldn’t get too long.

What's the origin of your blog's title? My thirst for Adar and the gauntlet kink he inspired.

Favorite Fandoms: I have a lot, but The Silmarillion/The Lord of the Rings/The Rings of Power are my main ones I always fall back on.

OTP(s) + shipname: I’m a self shipper so me + whomever I’m obsessed with (currently Melkor, Adar, and Gil-galad) but also more recently:

Melkor x Mairon (Angbang)

Adar x Celebrimbor (Silverscars)

Favorite color: Orange (also partial to purple and dark green).

Favorite game: Hero Quest (I’m not a console gamer. Though I did enjoy watching my husband play Horizon Zero Dawn).

Song stuck in your head: Dog Days (Are Over) by Florence and The Machine.

Weirdest habit/trait? Oh boy, where to begin… I make random noises, I meep like Beaker to songs, laugh at my own jokes… I’m just a weird person altogether folks.

Hobbies: Writing, visiting places of historical interest, I also used to be an avid reader but then motherhood robbed me of my energy and concentration. I listen to audiobooks more now.

If you work, what's your profession? I write scientific reports and run data tables for an Early Drug Development CRO, which is as fun as it sounds. I’m also a mother. Everything you’ve heard about motherhood is true and also a lie.

If you could have any job you wish what would it be? I would be rich enough not to need to work 🤷🏻‍♀️ or working on a petting farm would be cute.

Something you're good at: Berating myself. Encouraging others/being a cheerleader. Also writing, I hope 🙈

Something you're bad at: Most things, but especially anything requiring mathematics or physical exercise.

Something you excel at: Being a silly goose 😏thirsting over fictional characters 🙈 and raging at injustices. Erm, I think that’s about it. How tragic for me 😂

Something you love: The community I’ve found here on Tumblr 🫶🏼 period dramas, Dracula, and tattoos (I have none of my own… yet).

Something you could talk about for hours off the cuff: Mormonism, The Wars of the Roses, the people I love.

Something you hate: Injustice, mayonnaise, and corsets improperly portrayed in period drama.

Something you collect: Cuddly toy bats, and more characters to thirst over (I need help).

Something you forget: That motherhood is difficult so to give myself more grace.

What's your love language? I don’t adhere to love languages, but I guess genuine connection over similar interests, banter/in-jokes.

Favorite movie/show: Aaahhh don’t make me choose! It’s always changing.

Favorite food: Galaxy Cookie Crumble, Mini Eggs, Yorkshire puddings, and pizza.

Favorite animal: Bats 🦇

Are you musical? I can hold a tune and I played flute as a kid, otherwise sadly no.

What were you like as a child? Intelligent, saw everything in black and white, more artistic, more outgoing.

Favorite subject at school? History and art.

Least favorite subject? Maths and PE.

What's your best character trait? I like to think I’m kind and understanding.

What's your worst character trait? I can be so incredibly lazy.

If you could change any detail of your day right now what would it be? More sleep. Always more sleep.

If you could travel in time who would you like to meet? Bram Stoker. I’d also love to meet my mum as a young woman, I think we would have had fun.

Recommend one of your favorite fanfics (spread the love!):

Come by @perlen-gold (Angbang)

Of Convenience by @greenleaf4stuff (Silverscars)

Last but not least, show your favorite fanart of your favorite character(s) (please remember to credit/add links!):

Melkor/Morgoth

Adar

Gil-Galad (TROP)

No pressure tags for @greenleaf4stuff, @valar-did-me-wrong, @strifes13, @wowstrawberrycow, @iwanderbecauseimlost, @withallthatisleftofmyheart, @calmlyy-chaotiic, @margauxmara, @varda-starqueen, @saffronstories, @gingeragenda, @gracefallingart, @dwarveslikeshinythings, @whenimaunicorn, @permanentlyexhaustedpigeon88 and anyone else who would like to play! Sorry if I missed anyone.

[stardustinthesky]

Everybody's looking for you.

[northirish]

It's time, entomb me within the Bass Pro Pyramid for ten thousand years with my mutuals and I will return like Settra the Imperishable and my golden skeleton legions shall unleash a tide of blood and conquest unlike any the world has ever seen

[6okuto]

heads up :p

hello. archiving my blog soon. like in the next month or so. not shocking. i still have a lot to queue but i needed to say this so i can't back out for the gazillionth time 😭 i don't have a new blog and i'm not sure if or when i'll be back. as for 6okuto, i probably won't delete it! probably.

thanks for being here for almost 3 years!! it was really nice writing for the first time and getting to know you guys. please take care of yourselves, and i hope you have a good end to 2024! ^^

and just a final request to tell creators you enjoy their work. i can't tell you how many times one kind person stopped me from doing this a lot earlier. please help make tumblr a kinder and stronger community !!

regular pinned - masterlists

[ungodlyangel2506]

i am completely against image gen ai, which is trained on countless artists works without their consent (also known as stealing) by companies who then make money off of this, which is then used by businesses trying to find a cheaper alternative to paying the very artists who were stolen from, used by people scamming those actaully trying to hire an artist, used for filling social media with slop for views, and more, however i dont like a lot of the anti-ai posting i see online

its all "this is HUMAN art" "made by HUMAN" "only HUMANS can make art" i recently seen someone who made some stamps and buttons for artists that dont use gen ai, and they were all focused on the artists being "HUMAN" and i just feel like weve lost the plot a little

the problem with image gen ai was never that art created by humans is inherently better just because its made by humans, in my mind, its that The Image Theft Machine is thieving images, and then screwing over the artists it theived from ! its not that the "special magical human soul is giving the art life" its that people are losing their jobs because it costs less to ask Sloop-AI 3.0 or whatever the fuck to give you a shitty approximation of what you wanted, rather than to hire an actual artist

and i just think this sucks so so bad, not only because as this image generation has improved ive seen people actually jump ship and say that ai art does look like it "has a soul"(??) now, but also because not all artists are humans !!!! this just very specifically bothers me, similar to those "we are all human" inclusivity tshirts and the likes

its not just human artists getting stolen from ! art made by wolves is getting stolen too ! art made by angels is getting stolen too ! art made by dragons is getting stolen too ! even art made by robots and ai is getting stolen ! image scrapers dont care about whos behind the art, it steals all of it regardless, and in my opinion art made by those of us who arent human is important also, and also deserves to be treated with respect.

tldr: to say that ai gen images are bad because they lack "human soul" is greatly missing the point, and also this is an otherkin blog so you can connect that dots on that /lh

[vlueberries]

Scott McDaniel art I will defend you forever <3 Scott McDaniel art ily Dixon's NW run would be nothing without you, they hate you bc they aint you Scott McDaniel art!!!

It may look insane sometimes but ykw it has soul

[otrtbs]

anyway, i know it’s really easy to feel very doom and gloom right now and that’s fine, but if you’re looking for something to do about it, i strongly encourage everyone to seek out and get involved in their community’s mutual aid organizations! they’re a wealth of information, they organize events, they keep community pantries stocked and running. and now more than ever they need manpower. so help your neighbors, get to know them, see if there’s a community garden you can join. tell your friends.

i’m sure these are things you’ve been hearing recently, but it does help with the feeling of helplessness.

and if any of yall need resources for the southern usa/texas area reach out !! the more of us out here that start taking care of each other the better.

[bookwyrminspiration]

If you see me violently sobbing holding my mutuals close in gently cupped hands don't worry about it

[possamble]

What are your headcanons about Marcille's mom if you have any? It's interesting that what drew Donato to her was cause she lived the history he studied, or that was said somewhere at least. She must've had an interesting life.

so this was going to be just a normal answer but then I realized I have a Lot of Things To Say. so here goes, a compilation of what we know for a fact from the canon, what I've extrapolated from the visual cues and details, and my theories based on all of that.

Things we know for a fact about Marcille's mother because they were explicitly stated in the manga and supplemental materials:

She was a court mage for a Tall-man kingdom at the southern part of the Northern Continent

Donato, a court historian, fell in love with her because she had lived through the history he was studying, and he courted her for 17 years (age 15 to 32) before getting married

She was a cheerful person who rarely showed extreme emotion and took things as they came

She always cooked a huge meal for Marcille on her birthdays

She remarried a gnome after Donato's death and a short distance away from Marcille's childhood home

Pipi, Marcille's pet bird, was actually older than Marcille and originally belonged to her mother (bird died at 62)

She was extremely heartbroken when Donato died and ultimately ended up instilling a deep fear of mortality in Marcille with her words

the only time she showed extreme emotion in front of her family was when Donato could no longer eat his favourite dish near the end of his life.

She scolded Marcille for being cruel to ants (implying she can have a stern side when needed)

Things that are explicitly shown but mostly through visual cues

She has a very distinctive style of dress always involving a ribbon choker (mirroring Marcille's habit of always wearing a matching choker with any of her outfits that don't cover her neck)

She was almost stereotypically good at housekeeping and traditionally "wifely" things (very frequently depicted wearing an apron or doing some domestic chore when not at work, seems to have been an avid cook).

She knits? (also, note the affectionate smile as she's looking at Donato and Marcille reading a book together in the full panel)

She was as excited for Marcille's milestones as Donato was.

She didn't tell Marcille much about elven food

(there are a couple things that this panel in particular implies:

She lived a good deal of her life (if not being born and raised) in a mainly elven country in the West, implied by her knowing enough of an elven region's cuisine to prefer Tall-man food over it

seems to have a pretty carefree and casual demeanour overall, if this is how she replied to Marcille asking her about it (sounds like she never gave her culinary preferences that much thought to begin with)

slightly related to number 2, it seems like she and Marcille had a fairly casual parent-child dynamic (especially in comparison to the Toudens' memory of their father)

(local elf tastes Italian food once and never goes back))

However, she seems a lot more... serious in most of the other times we see her? Almost like the very stereotypical archetype of a graceful elf.

Subsequent conclusions about her personality:

Usually pretty carefree and cheerful at home, has been a loving and attentive parent throughout Marcille's childhood (while not being so doting that she didn't discipline Marcille).

Slightly more conjectural theories on her personality:

Had a much more graceful and professional personality at work, which would explain the more serious portraits we see of her.

Given that both she and Donato had positions at the royal court, it seems a little odd that she'd go out of her way to do all the housework herself, so maybe she just enjoyed doing it?

Now taping all the evidence together and toeing the line between analysis and fanfiction:

It's clear that she loved Donato very much and was utterly devastated by losing him. But there's one thing that really stuck out to me in what little we see of her:

Doesn't she seem... angry? The way she's gritting her teeth, clutching the tablecloth, and how this is the first and only time we see her eyes opened that wide. In the following panel, you see her being quiet and dejected after her initial outburst. She's still crying very intensely, but her brows are furrowed, and she's not really responding to Donato's affection in her body language.

We're not told the details of how she felt about losing Donato other than that it upset her. But this, to me, implies that she was angry and resented that he was aging, that the end of his life was approaching. An "it's not fair" type of preemptive grief. And if this was the first and last time she cried like this in front of her family, she was either very good at coping in private... or very bad at letting herself feel unpleasant emotions until they become unavoidable and end up overwhelming her.

It's not too remarkable a detail on the surface. It's even reminiscent of what the audience has seen of Marcille. But... when it comes to the big picture, you'd think an elf who voluntarily chose to marry a tall-man and have a half-elf child would have been better prepared for this.

It kind of recontextualizes her cheerfulness to me.

"I'm sure everything's gonna be okay!" (or some variation thereof, depending on what translation you have).

And this is stated to contrast her extreme grief when finally confronting Donato's failing body and eventual death. But I'm wondering if... maybe this optimism was why she was so upset. What if she went into all of it thinking "everything's gonna be okay"? What if she was a little young by elven standards, and just followed her heart thinking that her own resilience would get her through anything?

Of course, only to get completely overwhelmed when she actually loses Donato. She turns into a completely different person. And that's heartbreaking on its own-- but what the audience sees is the effect it had on Marcille. Can you imagine being her, watching your invincible and upbeat mother suddenly lose all the light in her eyes in one go?

I've already made a huge post about how I think Marcille models her "work persona" off her mother, but another thing that stuck with me as I was looking for more details in the manga was this:

copy pasting from the other post i made about it lmao it's like... the second she resigns herself to lifelong pain and terror, there's another portrait of her mother facing her like this. with their heads bowed, in mirrored body language of resignation and despair and sorrow. Except it's posed like Marcille is still looking at her mother but her mother is looking away.

It took me a second to realize, but I think that it's a visual metaphor for the fact that Marcille's mother was the only long-lived role model she had-- and she failed to model healthy grief for her daughter. I don't say this as an accusation or to disparage her as a character, but just as a matter of fact. In her, Marcille was seeing herself older and losing a short-lived spouse or loved one of her own, and all she saw was hopelessness.

But her mother didn't mean to instill hopelessness and terror in her. She wasn't really thinking of how it would truly affect Marcille at all (at least, that's how I'm interpreting her looking down and away from Marcille in the metaphor), she was just sad. And she, in her own way, was trying to protect her daughter and help her prepare for future losses.

What she meant was "loss is inevitable, and you have to learn how to be in pain but live on anyway." What Marcille heard was "loss is inevitable, and you will be scared and hurt for the rest of your life."

Again. Marcille's mother doesn't feature explicitly in the story the way her father does -- but in so many ways, her shadow, her silhouette, her reflection is always hanging over Marcille.

All that to say... headcanon-wise (everything from here on is 100% without evidence lmao), I'd like to think that she matured and realized that she failed Marcille. I imagine her being regretful about it, wanting a chance to fix it but never finding a way to insert herself back into Marcille's life when Marcille is so so so busy becoming the most accomplished mage possible. I imagine her being herself again, now, so many years after her loss and after remarrying -- but with her cheerfulness tempered with a lot more wisdom and the pain of having gone through loss like that. I think the second Marcille actually tells her what happened in the dungeon, she'd want to go running to her daughter again -- if Marcille tells her the full truth instead of just being embarrassed she let things get that far. (oh, the tragedy of her wanting to be more like her mother and an accomplished adult who doesn't need to be babied... being embarrassed to actually tell her mother how much she fucked up...)

There's also the tension of her having remarried -- I know that there's at least a little bit of resentment that Marcille harbours about that, because she's childish like that at heart even if she makes an effort not to externalize it. I think that her mother would be aware of that, potentially adding to her sense of guilt and apprehension at trying to reappear/intrude on Marcille's life. I honestly don't think Marcille has met her stepfather -- or even considers him a stepfather rather than "mama's new husband" and kind of a total stranger. I think she and her mother actively don't talk about it in their correspondence, like an elephant in the room.

but, ultimately, I think her mother is on her side no matter what. Ancient magic? Dark necromancy? Sure, she'll feel guilty and like she was partially responsible for setting Marcille down such a painful path, but she wouldn't care. that's her daughter!! she would've moved back west and been petitioning for her at the court, buying a house right next to the Canaries barracks and visiting her every day that she wasn't on a mission. And if her husband had opinions on Marcille becoming a "dark arts user," he either gets over it or it's divorce with him. Yes, she might have had her optimism completely humbled by losing Donato like that -- but she's still headstrong and self-assured and she doesn't care what people think of her. It's her way or the highway and she's always going to be in Marcille's corner.

(She also needs a name lol. I went with Juno, just to be cute about "Marcille"s closest real life equivalent being Marcella, which is the female version of Marcellus, which in turn is a diminutive of Marcus, which was derived from Mars. Absolutely in love with Marcille potentially being named after Ares/Mars the fucking god of war btw)