#get these two back on some track
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Hi guys, this is usually what a doodle page ends up looking like <3 (oh, and @ancha-aus thought you might like this! Not writing but certainly fuel to my fire lol-)
This one is New Age filled!!! (Close-ups abd Lore beneath the cut!)
1) Night and Cross!
Night is actually very clingy once he's a teen. He doesn't usually realize it, but around the castle he'll snake to be closer to his Knights so long as there's no one he needs to keep his composure infront of is nearby. Cross is the one who's not used to physical touch (when it's not Ink ofc) so Night in his personal bubble makes his heart melt but also scares tf out of him <3
2) Error and Night's Meeting!
Error was carrying his whole life on his back and trying not to get arrested for unintentional property damage at this point, so when he saw the chance to get back at his brother and prove he was strong enough? Yeah, he got that on chance instantly. And was VERY smug when Nightmare chose him. (Also, Error is wearing gloves, so less Haphephobia)
3) Dream and Blue designs!
I think these are good tentative designs! Dream probably has a more regal fit, but he likes to play up that rugged exile look- He's inspired by Archers, while Blue takes on that classic Knightly-vibe. Their equipment is mostly stolen from Night's troops or brought with them from Blue's home kingdom.
Also, Dream is approx Killer's height at this point, shorter than Cross and *much* shorter than Apple!Nightmare. (Hc that Skeletons tend to be tinier in stature thanks to weird monster beauty standards. Horror and Geno's fam are outliers.)
4) Horror and Dust designs!
Horror is naturally a very *large* monster. He's very malnourished when Nightmare meets him, but by the time he's a Knight Nightmare has made sure that's no longer the case. He actually loves comfy, simple clothes, but to play up the whole 'strong mysterious' bit he wears a more barbaric Knight's garb. He doesn't mind acting scary, it's more fun that way :]. Dust is very very small, and envies horror sometimes for his size, but his tiny stature let's him control his body and move a lot quicker. He's very much based on a rogue, and usually covers the lower part of his face w/ a black cloth, and the upper part w/ his hood or mask. Dust only removes both to bathe, eat, or relax in a safe location. (Ignore that I can't draw the stupid gaster blaster lmao-)
These last two were space-fillers, but Cross and his Borzoi (Windmill, otherwise known as Milly (Killer named her-)) and really bad first wips of Ccino! I think Ccino was a chubby, happy toddler, but lost a lot of 'weight' (bone mass? Magic?) due to stress and pressure and bad eating habits. So it isn't until a while after the Coronation that he starts to relax abd feel safe enough to eat normal meals (Nightmare used to guilt him into eating snacks together, but as his boss (and younger brother) he can encourage it more often). By the time Killer shows he's still not quite healthy, but he's better. As more weight is lifted off his shoulders, the better he is. (That 'beauty' most people saw was a more stereotypical slimness, but Killer never stopped seeing Ccino as beautiful-) I think he never looked traditionally underweight, so no one noticed, and it was only much later that Night processed it. (And maybe it's why Dream hardly recognized him later on-)
#new age au#I love showing mundane life things-#and also these designs beamed into my brain#I can't draw Ccino for anything but the others? yeag#Blue is definitely my fave. and just like every au I will draw Blue perfect the first time and draw Dust 6 billion times 😔#Horror is kinda banger too tho#makes me laugh to imagine Horror picking up Dust mid-fight out of convenience and Dust weighs nothing to him#(also this size difference is exactly why Dust and Horror fight in the non-magic training. and why Horror accidentally obliterated his#shoulder later on lmao- Dust needs to be able to dodge any enemy. Horror needs to aim for small and quick targets.)#(Meanwhile Cross is the newest and Killer the oldest and if Cross adapts to Killer then he'll adapt to the others more easily.)#oh! and Ccino w/ his arc? I think I really like the idea of a Ccino with a plump body-type. but that conflicts with my vidion of Ccino kinda#losing track of eating and being co-erced by adults to skip meals just enough to make him the 'right amount' of curvy#so when Nightmare takes over it's a habit he's so used to he hardly notices that he's doing it. but. Night picks up on it because Ccino is#almost akways with him. their relationship is very much Ccino giving his life to help Night#but it's also Night recognizing that and giving it back to Ccino along with more the moment he can#just smth smth this au is full of fit and exercized people and I think Ccino deserves some comfort and healing and positivity <3#also I am SO fond of Nightmare getting up in people's bubbles. he does it most to Killer and Ccino for obvious reasons but#god forbid a noble be talking behind his back because he *will* twist around and shove under his knight's arms or sides just to#read them the riot act or stare them down <3#and I think when he was an adult Night was... kinda like the big brother? like. not an experienced one by any means. but he wasn't *not*#affectionate then either. he was better at being serious about it and more discreet. but like#Nervous Cross escorting him in public? Night nudges his shoulder briefly with a Tendril to try and comfort him. Dust having a magic overload#? personal Training against just Night so there was no risk of harming anyone else. then snacks and tea after.#Horror is homesick? Woah look at that a scheduled trip back to visit with Crop and side-track back to Horror's village? huh?? wild...#Killer upset at all? Night will find a solution. just you wait. a cat. two cats. perhaps even a cat in a little sweater? or y'know. just a#chat or a combat?#Nightmare showed his affections but was just more distant about it.#Oh also. all four were used to tendrils lifting/tugging them subconsciously. usually during trainings to avoid them hurting eachother by#mistake in their early days. Killer misses it sometimes
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we sang in the aeroplane over the sea tgth ☆
#27% circle line with a lovely friend of mine rail tracks screeching etc etc u know the usual. im just gonna write down memories#a few weeks ago my friend read thus spoke zarathustra by the fire to the music she was dancing it was her silhouette#against the flashlight lit up gold and royal blues and tiger's silk i tried not to fall in love with her. in bordeaux we searched#for pomegranates he sent her 300 quid by the beach she cut it open with a knife her hand covered in red we each had a taste of her work#sweet red wet the sweetest grit. too barely clothed to go into the cliffside church they painted my eyes we painted hers#8 shots of gin she screamed joyfully IT'S ALIVE! at the book she said become the child i said i feel like a monster she said i was insane#i tried to believe her. fortified wine and later a red pen crossword defiled by humidity her hair in my hands two king sized beds#pushed next to each other she took her top off she told us to watch her arms raised up the musculature on her back was precise cut from#marble we saw oceans we saw the birds take cold baths the midnight sun over a wasp-infested pool our chemicals in their bodies#gold flakes dark skin gold cross shoulders against mine drawing some form of each other on the train i didn't hesitate#to say her eyes were beautiful over and over monks at the soapshop with titanium credit cards i loved you like i loved no other#he tied his hair up and walked us into the river he held a bullet between his lips i never held his hand he said what an honour#you own too much capital your mother thinks i'm a natural i realised i haven't told my mother i loved her in years she's always been mother#never mom i'll watch you watch seaweeds this is terminal akrasia i'll feel your fingers smear perfume on my lips your girlfriend grins#bite into the straw take the shot hold my hand get it all wrong draw in the sand kiss him right stab through leather shower in chlorine#you're the determinable vicissitude is all yours we won the Game AND the Battle AND the War i'm proud of you like crazy we feed each other#saffron cliffside lovers well-fallen brothers fat cats blue windows southwest sun ALife SynBio design aXAA grow us a city in silico#we've grown to the ends of glee fire-jumper ocean-eater sure-footed lists on lists hands on eyelids не устану искать тебя#...anyway ive put my face on this blog b4 but hiii again#feel free to rb btw the rants r not personal
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you ever wonder if the Glamrocks's face tracking acts up when they look at Glamrock-Freddy, like they'll look at his face, and the recognition will register as Freddy, but their systems for whatever reason or another think that there is a face overlapped on Freddy's do you think they see two small squares next to him, at his side, roughly child sized, but no one is physically there.... right...?
#fnaf#michael afton#five nights at freddy’s#glammike#crying child#elizabeth afton#i wanted to allude something to william but idk#would the glamrocks go into the sinkhole? maybe#maybe next to glamrock freddy alongside the weird overlapping face he has and the two kid height faces#there is a face tracking box next to him...standing#remember that post about the ghost hunters comin to the pizza plex? maybe the weird face tracking happens too...#im watching garret watts and Andrew's constant facial tracking anomalies inspired this post lol#anyways i really like the thought that despite being the most friendly Glamrock; Freddy has this......feeling about him#his AI was made just this year! programmed with cutting edge and top of the line technology!#then....then why does he go off script sometimes? why does he say things that wasn't programmed show dialogue?#how does he know about Mr. Afton? the killer from the 80's who committed heinous deeds?#Why does he speak as if he knew him personally? if his AI is just pulling stuff from online; Why does he speak with resentment about him?#IM SORRY I JUST LOVE THE CONCEPT!!#like just because this franchise has gotten more neon and sugery than ever; remember; lights can be blinding and sugar causes cavities#idk what that means just omg there is more horror potential than you think in the SB era of games if you look hard enough#off topic but back to freddy being a sweetie pie i think that its funny okay#freddy sasses adults okay okay but he isnt mean to kids okay maybe michael just idk; MATURED? maybe he just got some whimsy mkay?#listen if i was forced to be in a perpetual cycle of atoning for my own and my father's sins i would find any and all silver linings mkay#aw yeah this is sick i get to be a freddy mercury inspired glamrock bear WOOO#granted michael was probably tired of animatronic bands and pizza by fnaf 6 but ykkkkkkkk it.....could be worse? he could be his dad lmao#anyways headcannon michael listend to freddy mercury and this is the equivalent of cosplaying him scott told me so (trust)#tag rambles! theyre fun lol
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has anybody else thought about how jk could easily manage sofia's parts of slow dance or is it just me?
#jikook#bts#everybody is working to insert jk in who where i just don't see it (other than the seven parallels)#and not talking much about what i see as WAY more obvious nods most especially in rebirth#like jm sings about wanting to be worthy of someone - maybe someone who just became a huge SOLO global popstar?#and mentions 'real love' - what was the name of that chapter in the bangtan book again?#and the feminine pronouns not present it's just the nebulous 'you' that in jimin songs often stands in for 'army'#(and one very specific 'fan' who has said he is ALSO army)#it's the 'i wanna be with you'#the answer for jk's 'i am still' with its unspoken additional 'still with you' layer#and then we get slow dance and we're back to the nebulous 'you' - on an island he-#oh wait what was that about a pair that traveled to an island? and filmed some stuff there that we'll see soon? hm#the reason this set me off though is the lines about 'cancelling my plans' to live to 'the tempo of our favorite song'#the falling deep into lines etc etc#because we know what happens when those two get together - they lose track of time everything else fades away#it's why they haven't done lives. why 'you and me' are 'up all night' why jm knows that as soon as jk is around#his self-discipline will crack and he'll fall into the pattern he tried to head off by separating from jk while making face#and we *know* jimin wrote on this song#frankly if he *hadn't* gotten a female feature everybody would be JUMPING on this song as a jikook anthem#the inclusion of sofia works perfectly - like hammering the pin back in a grenade#but i was reading those lines and thinking how high she went and going who else could sing this ...?#huh. who do we know of who can sing *anything*? and who has a range that can hit and blend with jimin's perfectly?#so. i dunno. y'all do your delulu the way that works for you and i will do my delulu my way lol#personally i think the eyes in the mv look like a screenshot from the love wins all mv but that's only me#i think the parallels with seven work more#and speaking of parallels (there are so many) i think this album was built to ensure jm is on equal footing with a certain someone#it's the commerciality of it - as though jm was like we will be together in this as well#when he seems not to be super interested in global domination but still 'special' enough to be on the same level with his love
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2024 reads / storygraph
At The Feet Of The Sun
book 2 in a slow paced high fantasy duology*
the right hand of the emperor (who is off searching for an heir) struggles with what to do after passing on his responsibilities and also discovering various pieces of information that are mindblowing to him, personally,
after adventure is thrust upon him, he travels to find His Radiancy and they go on some otherworldly adventures while growing closer and figuring out the nature of their friendship
(*there’s extra novellas & i think another book coming? duology adjacent, currently,)
#At The Feet Of The Sun#lays of the heart-fire#aroaessidhe 2024 reads#giggling and kicking my feet. and also crying#bro the yearning….the yearning#I can definitely see why this loses people - it’s so long and very self indulgent#(listen. i enjoy it a lot . but does it need to be THAT long (i just checked. 375k? lord))#but it is easy to read and also very funny. it felt less repetitive than the first book to me#I did find it hard to keep track of some of the side characters though#The first world-travelling stuff caught me off guard initially - I feel like all the weird magic was more background in book 1?#or maybe I just didn't pay attention.#taking a step back it is a bit like - kip sure does achieve everything and then some and just continues to achieve everything huh#and it gets to a point where it's like.....okay yes I get he's so talented at this etc etc.#but I guess it’s a nice change of pace from the kingly swordfighting fantasy protagonist who’s perfect and wins everything -#someone whose skill is people and negotiation in a humble way is a bit more interesting. still. it maybe felt less grounded after a while?#the deep exploration of platonic yearning and desire for strong friendship and fear over that person just wanting romance/sex#when that’s Not what you want out of the relationship………#not to mention his complex feelings over meeting two people who were like his platonic soulmate rolemodels#and then finding out they just used that term because gay relationships weren’t accepted and trying to not be disappointed#(because gay is also good!) but also like. so lonely in feeling like nobody understands his desire for a platonic soulmate#to be treated equally as romantic relationships are. oof#I am a little baffled to see people interpret it as a romantic asexual relationship?#I feel like that does such a disservice to the . everything that has been set up in what 600k words of books#like the implication of that is that you think other romantic rships w/o sex are unheard of in this world. I find that hard to believe idk#(I mean - a bit romantic on fitzroy’s end; and in the nebulous queerplatonic area between friendship and romance; sure#but like a straight up romantic relationship just without sex - I don’t understand how it could be interpreted that way lol?)#(anyway other people’s interpretations don’t matter)#I do have questions about the telepathic dinosaur soulmates. you can’t just mention that and now show me them#also. kip being like 'wait there were sirens? i wonder if i can hire them' kshfkjsgkf#asexual books
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sketches from @mipexch 's whiteboard a couple days ago!!
also feat. a very small reference to @onlineviolence :]
#peridots-art#bugs#bots#ultrakill#gabriel ultrakill#swordsmachine ultrakill#bugzapper ultrakill#minos prime ultrakill#v2 ultrakill#plus the rest of the fumos but those weren't done by me. someone was drawing v1 so i put a v2 beside them and came back later to like 5 mor#hence why they are out of frame. anyway this was a LOT of fun I lost track of time and stayed up till dawn even#there were so many cool and/or recognized artists.... i keep checking the ultrakill tag to see if anyone else posts their own sketches#it was posted at like 2am my time though so i didn't get to stay very long.... i checked in today on the fumo drawings and there was#just so much new art over there and in general. so many people doodling and having fun and complimenting each other and bonding over#the things we all like. im gonna cry#anyway. i think this is the longest period of non-posting (not inactivity. lol) on tumblr i've ever had#so might've forgot some tags. also i think i'll use alt text for multiple images and regular id for 1-2#edit also i wrote 'today' in the tags up there but it was in fact two days ago. regardless#ALSO. sorry if the alt text is hard to read or anything. never used it before + penchant for lengthy descriptions#can you tell i'm really proud of the beetle gabe btw. men will see a character say 'anyone gonna buggify that?' and not wait for an answer#WAIT i've already made that joke haven't i. whatever turn your blorbo into an insect or some sort of gay bug today
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.
#i have so much to tell my past self but she'll never get to hear it so i guess ill keep this here for future meg.#hi. remember when we applied for our dream uni for undergrad and we couldn't make it?#remember when the first two years of uni when everything got so terrible that you didn't even think youd make it to the end of the year?#well. guess what. we made it <3#yeah. we made it through.#with a year off and some recalibration and a good internship we managed to get back on track!#and we did well!! we got better and we were able to perform better and we got our gpa up and we got two good journal publications and#we made a lot of good friends this time around <3 and we have a lot of people on our side now <3#it doesn't hurt like it used to. crazy. it doesn't hurt at all.#and remember dream uni? yeah. we're going there for our masters now :))#dear past meg. im so proud of you for holding on. i hope you're proud of me too <3#we're living the days we dreamed of <3#and dear future meg. i hope that when things get tough you remember the things you've managed to overcome.#you're tough as nails. you got this <3#megumi in the tags#will end up making this a proper gratitude post soon but for now. here it is
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wips list for the end of march
nevermore (145/300k, edit complete)
queenmaker (16 chapters written)
FNF (8/10k)
leave part 2
what the water brought (25/50k)
boxer!minho? dlc? something
sick fic (handed to keeps, godspeed)
the gone and the gathered ch 3&4
valleys (complete rewrite)
tgbyb ch 5
tsotl end part 1
darling don't wake up x4
goldmine goldmine (landmine) (6/40k)
soul is yours to keep/zelda fic
draculas
the finished things list! raise a glass!
leave part 1
lyre lyre
#could boxer minho be an smau?#can i do a dystopia smau?#HMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM#keeps when you see this tell me the thoughts#RAIN when you see this tell me your thoughts#also zom mom i did not forget you#you're on an absolute roll with the angst rn#but don't get distracted from thinking about your smau by thinking about my dystopia#but tell me#everyone#tell me what you think#dystopia? smau?#it could be interesting hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm#anyway we don't have time for that right now#what have we got to do immediately#qm and nevermore of course#i've been whacking away at wtwb again for some reason#most of the stuff at the bottom is just#a pipe dream except the random scene i wrote for goldmine the other day#and the two novels#those i have to start working on really soon#i was just trying to get nevermore back on track and then valleys shifts right up the priorities list#roo writes
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🦭
#hellsing#hellsing ultimate#seras victoria#integra hellsing#sertegra#a#yay guns!!!!!!! murder.!!!! intimidation tactics!!!!!!!!#happy Saturday!! ‼️‼️🧍♂️🫶‼️‼️❤️‼️‼️#so sorry for the sertegra shortage I spent all week trying to lip sync things then remembered I had actual work to do#but I finally finished it!!! albeit I got a bit lazy but I did it! yay yippee!!!!!!!!!!!#beach boys hellsing power point going bonkers ‘every sentence has been said at some point in time’#I can prove that shit false using the power of horrible horrible connections that no one else would ever feel the need to make#anyway you guys should listen to Sunflower she’s warm and fluffy and has a lot of whole band collaboration#like you have Dennis And Bruce contributing songs that’s crazy you have two Bruce songs that never happens! also cool cool water is fun#yay scrapped smile tracks! and unlike the other smile scrapped ones that they put on studio albums she’s like a unique lil lad#like the whole first part isn’t at all on the like 2011 recreation unlike say vegetables which gets remashed or our prayer which is iden#okay well actually maybe it is more like vegetables in that sense it’s more it’s cutting something instead of adding#which a lot of the 2011 versions were adding things back that were cut like the cantina part of heroes and villains#actually okay now that I’m thinking about it shit would require a lot of explaining I can’t just drop the Charles Manson lore#or some shit like that and just move on… sorry beach boys 💔
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So last night I made out with my friend (hopefully soon to be partner. We're talking some stuff out) and aside from just being really fun, I learned I apparently really like teasing them and I may not actually be 100% submissive
#dont get me wrong#im still a massive bottom#but also i grabbed them by their throat and made them purr#at one point they were leaning back to collect themself and I grabbed them by their jaw and said 'no no no. come here' kinda aggressively#and they made some *very* nice noises#we just kept going back and forth teasing each other and getting revenge when one of us made the other one flustered#at one point i broke them just by crossing my legs#i was wearing this dress with a tall slit in the skirt#so when i crossed my legs it fell open and showed like my *entire* thigh#i was still decent but i could see them rebooting and they just went 'what was that. what did yo do??' in this adorable shaky voice#we completely lost track of time and ended up leaving the lounge area we were hanging out in a little past 5 in the morning#and we'd gotten there at 11#and had a 2-3 hour break when some girls showed up to use the microwave for their dinner#they were cool and we hung out and shared queso#and then my friend got me super flustered as soon as the two of them left by telling me how cute I am when i talk about my interests#while they were choking me a little#i have. not recovered.#my post
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Happy things day 3
• talked about Christmas traditions with coworkers over a zoom call for a long time, it was cheerful
• listened to my church’s Christmas songs for this year’s Christmas Eve services to get a feel for them
• listened to some other favorite Christmas church tunes from years past ❤️
• friend from church who has religious OCD possibly worse than me got triggered really badly last week but has been hinting that God has been really good to her this week, and I’m relieved that it seems like God brought her through that trigger
• my dog got a haircut and lost SO MUCH FUR she looks like a different dog, but she seems really happy so I think she feels better 🥹
• I did something I’ve been meaning to do which is get copies of some of my favorites of my grandparents’ (the ones who passed last year) recipes and put them in my recipe book.
• it is Friday. Praise the Lord.
#Happy posting#yesterday and today were really hard#Experiencing some big doubts about salvation and struggling and failed twice to do ERP/my therapy#It’s my first big fail since I committed in July#And it’s just really hard to see myself failing at it when I committed#I’m hoping and praying God gives me the strength to get back on track because it’s been two days in a row and I’m kind of scared
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care to share your updated Aki collection? Would love to see the new wall grid especially now that there's more Aki keychains!
To more Aki purchases ahead <33
yes, of course!!!!
pls ignore the messiness in the aki shrine... I am going to be reorganizing everything as soon as I have the time... I'll post some more pics and closeups whenever I do that.... this is temporary setup
#I'm going to buy some little riser things for the shrine#so I can better display some of the little items and stands#and then when I have a day off I'll take everything down and fully reorganize#but I'm working the rest of this week so that won't be for a while lol#too many akis not enough space!!!#and these two I got today are literally so big they take up so much space 😭😭😭#BUNCH OF FATTIES#but.... I've got another plushie on the way#and I'm going to order the new aki prize plush that comes out tomorrow as soon as I find a good listing#so I'll hold back on reorganizing until those arrive#then I'll make room for everything#being the parent of so many topknot sons is hard work........#ask mags#aki <3#thank you for caring anon. I kiss you#should I link my my figure collection page somewhere? you can keep track of my collection there#me just now noticing I left my 3ds in the pic cause I'm trying to get my mii to have babies with the aki mii I created
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Just realized I forgot to post these
#keese draws#oc art#oc#ocs#these guys are from the same story as the grape twins btw#root beer is their cousin and one of the four main characters#dragons beard is merlot's boyfriend and fellow antagonist#and lemon taffy is the older sibling of one of the other main characters who spends most of the story 'kidnapped'#and by kidnapped I mean the super villain polycule asked them if they could help them with some tests and they went 👍#important context! lemon taffy (and their two siblings) are the kids of three superheroes and merlot and fox grape are the kids of four#supervillains both of which are mostly absent for the main story (although the supervillains at least get to be more of side characters)#the heroes are off in space dealing with alien political drama that doesn't matter to the main plot#the two groups have a fairly casual rivalry but they still have genuine beef#merlot and fox grape were left home alone after their parents set out to work on some big project and merlot took the chance to go fuck#off and get a boyfriend to do crime with leaving fox grape desperately trying to find them and get them to come back home#and for the other side root beer was roped into helping rescue lemon taffy by their two younger siblings pop rock and jelly bean#he and pop rock are the main duo on that side with jelly bean being their guy in the chair#merlot and dragons beard are mostly antagonists to those three with fox grape and the other main guy cayenne pepper chasing after them#cayenne is dragon beards childhood friend and I have never drawn him before despite adoring him 😔#hes such a piece of shit I love him#in my old original concepts for him he was going to be an incel but then my brain went but what if. aro. and I instantly hard committed#hes a bitchy asshole who's made all the more annoying by the fact that his anxieties are low key completely justified#hes a sad wet cat abandoned in a cardboard box all alone 😔#oh yeah also worth noting that root beer is a vampire who has a strained relationship with his adoptive dads#oh and dragons beard's parents are a dragon and a royal fae so he has a lot of power that he doesnt know how to use lol#lemon taffy is like. sort of part dragon in a very distant way? their grandma was a failed revival of an old god who was a dragon who made#their dad out of her own magic which included that same magic from the dragon god who was basically made of magic#so he was also sort of part dragon but not really? idk its complicated#merlot and fox grape are miraculously not part dragon somehow despite my track record of making too many ppl dragons in this world#they are however vampires and also directly decend from a god so thats fun
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still got an occasional gross cough and a bunch of anxiety over being back at work with a certain horribly exhausting person but prolonging the stress will prob make it worse so I might as well go back to work tomorrow.
I stress cleaned everything in my flat today except the piles of washed clothes and unwashed dishes so things are back to normal once more, and then I sorted out all the stuff for upcoming project + exam prep and packed my bag for tomorrow and laid out clothes so I'm as ready as I can be.
gonna be exhausted tho bc it's already 11 pm and I gotta be up by 4:30 am at the latest if I wanna be at work at my usual time. I don't have to be there at 6:30, I could go there at 9 or 10 even but then I would have to stay late and deal with people right away, which is a strong hell nah for me
#we'll see how it goes. if I end ul feeling like utter shit in the morning or the cough gets worse again as it has been kinda#then I'll just divert to going to the doc instead. maybe ask for another day or two. it'll be a short week anyway#since the 3rd is a national holiday and most ppl will take the following day off to have a long weekend#so we'll see. gonna go with my gut on this. either way. and try to fight against the anxiety bc it'll just escalate again if I let it#today was proof enough of that. cleaning the entire place bc of nervous energy is a clear sign that I'm not doing so hot#but as therapy teaches you: recognising the pattern is the first step in changing it. so all that's left is adjusting behaviour#can't fix her attitude and her lack of care about anyone else and her disregard of other people's emotions#all I can do is focus on the rest of the bunch bc they're wonderful folks and on the work since there's plenty to do#esp with the project time starting now. I really gotta get on that. I have a week and a half to figure out the practical aspects etc#and I'm sure I'll be returning to a bunch of emails and messages and unfinished tasks rip#all the more reason to be there early as usual so I can take some time to get back on track#a day in the life of..
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those playdough ass sims aren't gonna fit in with that beautiful beautiful lighting let's get a move on i wanna see some realistic skin folds (MODELED not a flat texture) and blemishes and subsurface scattering i want that-specific-breed-of-maxis-match-tiktoker-you-know-the-ones tears
#i changed my mind about not liking the hair being clay#as long as people can still make alpha hair i actually like having the option between the two i wasn't thinking#in my dream utopia we get some kind of particle system but in actuality that would make modding way less accessible#and you can't count on ea to give us all the hair we want so that's definitely a no#but i hate the completely smooth plastic skin. away with it#i saw people say those supposed leaks look 'too alpha' YOU'VE LOST YOUR MINDSSSSSSSS#just because the shirt's not painted onto the skin with a shitty low quality jpg graphic doesn't make it 'alpha'. unfortunately#they were on the right track with sims 3 medieval but noo#project olympus has done so much damage it's unreal. in a million years aliens are somehow going to trace the apocalypse back to it#my mom was trapped in the passenger seat of my car today listening to me explain the entire project olympus history. i'm sorry#i mentioned the live stream and she harmlessly asked if it seems better than ts4. like oh man do you have a minute to hear about ts4#but it's on my mind it's such an interesting topic too bad it poisoned my water supply and killed everyone i love
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Many things in the oven rn. None of them are what I'm supposed to be working on tho LOL
#brain spun the wheel of Hyperfixations and landed on Spiderverse#So I'm working on smth for that#when I know I should be working on my WH and FNAF fics that are. literally in the works#my therapist said we should do some checklists for ADHD because this happens a lot in my life and appearantly its a 'symptom' or whtvr#the wheel thing specifically. And the new project thing bc I am constantly getting new ideas and focusing on them for like. two weeks.#kamu rambles#Anyway I will pull myself back on track even if its kicking and screaming I PROMMY
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