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#get them he did get the grandma one which was funny bc of how he reacted
bunnyb34r · 2 years
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Whyyyy do I watch horror game let's plays when I KNOW it's gonna spike my paranoia something BAD
#im so stupid 🙃#it was the jerma stream of the mortuary assistant which was a hilarious stream but a scary game#i mean it wasnt like phasmophbia scary but it was... unsettling to say the least#and i just spent an hour reading lore on it bc he didnt get all the endings and i wanted to know why chat was yelling at him to grab#the necklace and coins if he didnt use em BUT it was bc the scene that you need to trigger to use those is randomly generated and he didnt#get them he did get the grandma one which was funny bc of how he reacted#anyway very interesting game! i like how you just think it's a mortician game until the second shift and youre like ohhh nooo...#and then the more times you play you can unlock different endings and learn more lore which was a cool mechanic#and having the haunts be randomly generated was also cool bc certain ones lead to different ''secret'' endings which gets the player to#keep playing over and over very nice#unfortunately my paranoia spikes h e a v i l y when i watch/read horror shit#i wish it didnt but its so stupid like i KNOW it's not real and that i wouldnt feel like this any other day had i not seen it which proves#that it's not real to my paranoia BUT IT DOESNT HELP BC MY BRAIN SUCKS#im trying to ''AND HERE COMES BOSHA WITH A STEEL CHAIR! AHHH HES GOT THE DEMON BY THE NOSE!!'' my way out of it but...#(ill picture my stuffed bear beating the shit out of whatever im paranoid ab and sometimes it helps like oh no worries Bosh has it#covered if any stupid monster comes here. boshas got it)#anywsy thats a lot of tags agdgdggdgdgdgd#marquilla
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vesora · 2 years
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is law of assumption real? yeah
i have come across an individual vilifying the loa community and i find their statements kinda funny and stupid but i love having my beliefs challenged bc i can know why i believe in this. please also read my response to this other girl who thought loa ppl were crazy. it is ok to think if it’s crazy. ur welcome to criticize it. also, i am using aesthetic pictures bc of my ocd, i need things to be divided.
this is for the people who want to listen whether LOA is real from MY perspective:
firstly, i was primed for law of assumption from a young age. this means that i experienced many and i mean MANY spiritual things from a young age. i saw spirits (not hallucinations, it was my dead grandma who i had never seen and i described her down to her ring to my dad and he started crying because it was her), started speaking french at random points without ever having consciously learned the language, heard random piano compositions in my ear which i had never heard before, had visions which protected me/warned me about the future/informed me about the future and many manyyy more things. this proves to me the power of the subconscious mind.
the difference between someone who was born with their third eye awakened versus someone who has no spiritual experiences + is not open-minded to it, is that they will view spiritual phenomena from a materialistic practical sense.
this is saddening, because humans before being impacted by materialism were so spiritual and we were the ones who created the pyramids and all the structures you see on earth. we did that.
anyways,
is it real?
my opinion: yes. 
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no i am not in a cult waiting to pounce on the next vulnerable piece of meat. in fact, my future career is removing people out of cults and helping trafficking victims but anyways.
i have manifested things far beyond logic. you know how and why? because manifestation is the most basic human trait. and awakening to the fact that you are the creator of your reality is the most liberating amazing feeling and practice. i manifested one of my dying cats becoming free of cancer. that is not luck. that is manifestation. i manifested bad circumstances away. not luck, manifestation. i manifested all my exes leaving me the SAME way because i had assumed they would. not a coincidence, manifestation. there is definitely a lot we don’t know about the universe. i can’t say with certainty that all things are attributed to us which is also why i hate any form of victim blaming. but one thing is for sure is that humans have more control over our lives than we think. we don’t need a divine presence outside of us to dictate us the circumstances in OUR lives.
also, law of assumption is not law of attraction. law of attraction is “AHHH DONT THINK BAD THOUGHTS OR U WILL GET BAD JUJU” very fear-based, also seen in dogmatic religions. law of assumption uses a CBT based approach to change assumptions and therefore, influence reality. you have every right to not believe in this and even chastise me for it, i understand. however, i know this is real for me.
i was a victim of many racist attacks, however, as soon as i decided that the outside world is safe for me, i never had ONE negative experience. is this a coincidence? not for me, no. this is a human taking control of their life. this is a human not bound by societal expectations and leaning into divine energy and expressing the truest essence of one’s self. i am not blaming myself for being a victim, it is the racist’s fault. i am not blaming other victims, it is the perpetrators’ fault. however, if there is any fucking chance i can help a victim, i will take it, i do NOT care.
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things i manifested regarding other people towards me:
1. no more racism towards me, family and friends.
2. parents being emotionally available with me
3. my friends expressing affection the way i want them to
4. my mum making me the exact food i visualised many times
5. my professor saying the exact words to me as i visualised
6. my friends saying to me the exact words i visualised
7. this guy flirting with me out of nowhere because i visualised it
8. and many more stuff this shit is too easy so
maybe i feel this strongly because i am a fighter for the working class. my main goal in life is to help liberate all oppressed people. if there is any chance that it can be done by mind, i would take it. would you not? would you not help people by the means you have helped yourself?
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how can you so strongly and with such conviction without ever practising the law come to a conclusion that is a harmful new age ideology when the maxim prevalent in so many esoteric practices (yes, non-white too) have preached that reality is made by the mind? will we ignore the science behind it too? will we ignore the cia declassified documents? will we ignore ancient accounts of reality shifting? will we ignore hermes trismegistus? will we ignore rumi? will we ignore plato? 
you can ignore this. i won’t, however. this is the liberation of the human soul. having said this, anyone is welcome to criticise the LOA community, look at us as vultures, think we are crazy. i value all opinions (even if they’re wrong HAHA sorry). 
how is loa different from dogmatic religion?
well for one, there is evidence for conscious manifestation (e.g. dr joe dispenza’s books). i personally do not like religion. i have religious trauma so if you are religious, id advise you to not read this section. abrahamic religion is based on fear to oppress minorities, trap human potential and it also makes you rely on luck and wishful thinking (this view is only if the holy books were to be taken in the literal sense and abused by ministers etc) whereas the human is able to decide its own fate. law of assumption liberates the human by putting the human from an us vs them view to an us AND them view, meaning everyone is one and the same. this is not a christian thing, this is a well documented thing featured in asian philosophy. consciousness is the thing that unites us all. it is within you and it is within me. religion (abrahamic) forces you to look at the people who are not like you, aka dont believe what you do, as these other creatures who have defied the will of God and ahhh will face wrath. LOA instead empowers the individual and promotes free will. i understand if you think this is dangerous, the woo-woo stuff, just dont practise it.
how is loa not a cult?
loa CAN be misused in a cult but on its own it is not a cult. no one in the loa community is forcing the individual to join this practice which lowkey is just manifestation. however, i get your concerns and i advise you to read this reply: x
i wish i took pics of my cat when she was sick so i could provide u guys evidence but of course i didnt take any pics.
anyone is welcome to leave. anyone is welcome to adjust loa to their lives the way they see fit.
the void state
i doubt that so many people are lying about manifesting in the void state. i do think it’s not a big deal but i definitely don’t think it’s fake. besides, whats the harm in trying?
thing is right, if you are not garnering results or whatever, u dont need to stay. i stayed regardless of whether i manifested my shit instantly or not (which in the beginning was hard for me) because i believed in the philosophy, it resonated with me and it didn’t make me alienate my fellow man. however, if you feel you have a chance of being manipulated here or idk what, don’t join this practice. seriously, it’s okay. i am not being sarcastic or anything, because you are welcome to stay or leave. you are welcome to compliment me or insult me. i will love you either way for you are my fellow man.
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also this is so random and a general thing but only psychoanalytic/psychodynamic psychologists use the subconsciously thing.
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palskippah · 10 months
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does Magma Mario shift between two forms? One human and one koopa. What’s the requirement for becoming koopa for her like full name or getting angry
Hi!
Yes, she's a shapeshifter and got those two forms only dhdjdh
[[I think I already said this somewhere, but she had to be human enough if she wanted to survive in Luigi's body 🧍 because had she been fully koopa it would have just kicked her out right away. Because a koopa (reptile) is not compatible with a human (mammal) but Bowser is a royal koopa and he has magic and stuff so his body makes it work 👁️👁️]]
She can control her shapeshifting at will, it's not really controlled by her emotions. If she gets very angry she'll growl and stomp and blow out smoke furiously, but if she wants to keep human form while she's throwing her tantrum, then that's how it's gonna be.
But if she's feeling sad or ashamed, for example, she would turn into koopa and hide inside her shell, until the unpleasant feeling goes away.
In fics they say sometimes that koopas got shell pockets, but what if when Magma keeps stuff in her shell and then shifts into human all her things just fall to the floor and she's like 🧍
When she was a baby though, she didn't have much control over it, and at random times she shifted into koopa or human. Magma was born human(ish) and not long after she was in Luigi's arms she shifted to koopa and him and Bowser (and Mario) were like :0 and :D because it was a pleasant surprise ajdkdhd
When she's human, I'm not thinking of it as keeping the koopa form down or anything (like she gotta shift to feel free in her body or something like that?) or viceversa. Like, both forms are Magma and most often it's the human one. But when she's human sometimes she feels her tail or tries to sweep it and realizes she doesn't have it at the moment (ghost tail??). Or her posture hunches, as if the form of her shell was at her back. (By the way, the shell magically appears as do the scales).
Also, and know that Luigi has never implied that he feels left out as the only human in their mostly koopa family, but Magma has favored since she was small her human form unconsciously to be like her mama- only that she's maybe three times his size when she's older, but that's beside the point. So maybe out of habit she keeps her human form more than the koopa (so Luigi isn't the only human in the family??)
Btw, she's as (very) tall in both forms, so in that way it doesn't make much of a difference. And she can breath fire (or maybe has a power-hand too like Luigi?) in both forms, so. She is a bit stronger as a koopa tho.
And here's a thing I drew the other day sjsjd where Magma has one of those walls where her height is tracked, and sometimes there's big growth spurts, and other times the difference each year is not very big.
Luigi is always the one to mark it, and he starts using a stool to reach her head way too soon in his opinion. Besides, Magma is very happy when she's taller because on one side is funny because Junior is shorter than her and she always makes sure to remind him of it, and on the other she can be as tall as her papa (which is cool!)
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Also, a thing I talked with a mutual the other day, about how their fanbaby once becomes a teenager stops the saying daddy thing and just go with saying dad (and it breaks Bowser's heart JSKDHD). But I think it's funny and also cute that my aunts and mom are all grown ups and call my grandma mami still :'v So, Magma and Junior keep calling them mama and papa, even if the rest of the koopalings go with mom, ma, mommy, or dad, father, pa, or idk sjssh
Also, maybe all her clothes are magic-ed to not get in the way when she shapeshifts, so even as a koopa she wears her short-sleeved shirts and overalls.
Here's another drawing I did that I didn't like, but you can look at her face 🧍And she has purple eyes bc Bowser has red eyes and Luigi's are a light blue so why not mix them up. And in a post about the movie someone pointed out that Bowser got like retractile (??) front teeth and maybe Magma has those too, and if she applies enough force on her bite they come out.
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blankvort · 5 months
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tangentially animal-related hcs 4 the mean girls crew bc i am now responsible for giving a goldfish daddy issues
cady
inexplicably allergic to dogs and always in the first four stages of grief about it. don’t @ me about the medical semantics i just want her to suffer a little
tried to get a job at petco the second she turned eighteen but learned of the above information in the most destructive job interview since janis’s application to be the local coffee shop’s cool gay barista (they were worried that she’d swear at fighter-jet-takeoff volumes if she touched hot coffee) (she did, but only because they started playing a shitty pop cover of one of damian’s fave show tunes) and came out of the building a puddle of mucous and tears
grossly fascinated by the grossest of primitive functions. her insta page is all dope and authentic until you find a selfie taken using the back camera 0.5x with the corpse of an effervescent snail and a bunch of reels telling you how to narrow down what bird species are destroying your garden by the splay of their shit
has a miniature aneurysm whenever movies get stuff wrong about animals. artistic liberties are granted to janis alone. like sure if she’s in the theater she’ll sit through the movie fisting popcorn down her throat but as soon as she gets out of there the entire mall becomes a soapbox for dissecting the bullshit sexual dimorphism of giving female animals eyeliner
thus while i know the headcanon of her loving the lion king is basically canon i think she’s absurdly secretive about it. like she’s burying her merchandise and blu-ray copies under her bed in the dead of night while secreting more sweat than should be possible. she could come out to her parents and elope to antarctica no problem but liking the lion king which implies that lighter manes = stronger lions is a death sentence
probably got banned from a bunch of zoos for interrupting field trips 
janis
had one of those angel/wolf/dragon/whatever hybrid phases as a kid like all good artists. did those like. not quite furry but not quite human animal art commissions on twitter for a while for the funnies but discovered a lucrative market and never turned back
does not know how to hold human or animal babies. like she’s good at taking care of them in terms of general physical and intellectual nourishment but that limp wrist is not supporting any necks properly
mercilessly makes fun of the whole “would you love me if i was a worm” trend. she doesn’t even love most humans what makes you think she has any answer for you regarding that other than that she’d turn you into a super deep art piece museums would purchase for exorbitant amounts
that being said she feels like a vivarium girlie to me. she’s nocturnal like a pillbug and post-canon constantly tries to convince the plastics that her pacman frog is poisonous
feeds her meticulously decorated ant farm gourmet meals every day. anyone else gets microwavable mac and cheese at best
this one probably won’t make sense unless you’re a jenny nicholson fan but she has a fake id for buying wine and turning the corks into those hallmark craft animal sculptures (and selling the open wine bottle to mrs george in back alleys)
damian
his grandma owns the most omnicidal chihuahua in the state of chicago. it’s how he learned to dance with such mental and physical dexterity. how else would he have survived visits to the nursing home
^ attempted to adopt the chihuahua’s children to have his own bruiser woods moment. turns out, even with his classically trained tenor voice, puppies and janis respond to the “drop it” command much the same way. that is to say they do not drop it and the puppies ran away with ninety nine per cent of his anastasia-inspired music box memorabilia
has a love-hate relationship with cats the musical. like memory is one of his top ten karaoke songs but he’s not going to admit it until he’s several fruity seltzers into the night. wishes all the actors in the movie had been replaced with real cats picked off the street before anything else was approved
played milky white in a scammy local production of into the woods and so so so embarrassed about it. he had to be on stilts the whole show
stuck a fish in regina’s backpack sometime in sophomore year but found karen feeding it and talking to it about her worst fears and greatest dreams felt too guilty to continue with the next phase of his plan (sticking a very hot picture of janis in regina’s backpack) (karen probably would’ve tried to talk to the photo too)
regina
musical specific but i think she didn’t Exactly do a matching animal costume with gretch and karen because 1) what can you dress up as when your friends are going as a cat and a mouse. cheese? 2) had cady not moved into the neighborhood, she’d have gone as a sexy lion to ease into the prospect of. you know. with shane oman but going as a sexy lion when your shiny new homoerotic frenemy has a lion pin on half her clothing isn’t quite a non-questionable choice
had a warrior cats phase she keeps under lock and key in the very depths of her closet. her closet is an iceberg of issues that goes shein -> homosexuality -> warrior cats and climate change is doing a number on it
fried a couple of janis’s ants alive with a magnifying glass sometime before middle school. she’s never flirted normally in her life
the bulk of janis’s furry commission clientele. she has so many emails for alternate accounts that she could get every american president ever suspended from twitter if national security let her. that’s including the dead ones
remember the nigh-rabid chihuahuas damian had. yeah she’s been raising those in secret for a few years now. mrs george doesn’t notice because regina hides them in her hair and extensions are, like, totally in or whatever
had a horse girl phase. all her drawings of horses came out like this meme tho. the art freaks nickname was born out of jealousy
gretchen
chose to be a sexy cat for halloween to match with karen because she has no sense of identity. also because she remembers regina’s warrior cats phase
actually a guinea pig person. i’ve never met a guinea pig person but she feels like one. they’re both in dire need of daily interaction and likely polyamorous
but also peri-canon gretchen could not keep a pet alive she’d spend every cent of the wieners fortune on buying the animal’s love
speaking of. her family bought a stable to fuel “her” horse girl phase. she just wanted to make regina happy and couldn’t stay on a saddle if there was an escalator that plopped her right on the horse
cares about the puppy bowl more than she cares about the superbowl
instinctively pets cute animals. if they bite her then she deserved it
karen
chose to be a sexy mouse for halloween because tom and jerry was having a media marathon and she’s into that sort of power dynamic
believes in unicorns more than she believes in horses. this is because she had a horse girl phase for the hottest of seconds before realizing that none of the ponies at the apache trail sale had horns and thought they had their horns cut off for aesthetic reasons
animals love her so much. survived a jellyfish attack because the jellyfish sensed she just wanted to pet something shiny and absolutely respected that. pests of all shapes and sizes evict themselves stat when karen says her mom doesn’t appreciate her hundred thousand dollar lotions being invaded by peril-bringing insects. strays follow her 24/7. gretchen is jealous (of the animals)
thinks tigers are very sick zebras
thinks blobfish are cuter when they’re all flesh putty out of their natural habitats but would also break into a zoo if she thought the animals were being mistreated
was banned from australia at the age of eight because she tried to have a sleepover in a kangaroo’s pouch
aaron
mean girls insta described him as a golden retriever so i’m also hcing him as being allergic to dogs <3 equality
becomes deeply fearful of all fauna after falling into a research rabbit hole for the sake of connecting with cady. what do you mean buffalo are some of the deadliest beasts on the planet and not just a type of chicken wing
kevin g
a preteen vsco girl in her granola advocacy era stuck in a teenage boy’s body. he has saved more turtles than any natucate volunteer by repurposing his rejected business cards to make a selfie stick long enough to stick him in the same selfie as gretchen wieners. the selfie stick has been in progress since daycare. he has also gone to the hospital more than any natucate volunteer do not trust this man with shop class equipment
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7ndipity · 6 months
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Get to know me
Thanks to @bethanysnow for tagging me!
❣ Who is your favorite Kpop group?❣
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Bts and Stray Kids! There's several groups that I love, but these two hold a very special place in my heart���
❣ Which member sparked your interest first?
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I don't quite remember for Bts, but I'm pretty sure it was Namjoon. I was really drawn to his general style and aesthetic, as well as his solo work like Mono.
For Skz, it was Hyunjin, bc gifs of him kept popping up in my recommendations after the 'Oh' mv was released and I got curious and checked them out. So it's basically his fault for bringing me into this fandom, lol!
❣ Who was your first bias?
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Yoongi and Chan
❣ Who is your current bias?
Yoongi and Chan(lol)
❣ What makes them your bias?
For Yoongi, he's the grandpa to my grandma energy, lol! Fr tho, I think it's bc he's so genuinely himself?? Like I love his dry humor, his writing style, his awkward tsundere energy, despite having such a soft heart🥺. Like, I will never understand how people think he's cold or indifferent, he's such a kind, loving person. I really admire his drive and passion for music, he's one of the people who inspired me to take back up writing. Idk, it's just everything.
For Chan, he's just super sweet and funny, and he clearly cares so much for everyone around him, from his group members to their crew/staff to the fans. He's also just soo relatable, and I really admire his dynamic with the fans, he feels like a best friend. I also really appreciate his honesty on tougher topics like self love and mental health. He's brought me so much comfort on tough days and makes me want to be a better person. Again, Idk, he's just Chris💜
❣ Who is your bias wrecker?
Literally EVERY OTHER MEMBER of both groups, lol! Like it's impossible not to love all of them!
❣ Which member(s) are you currently obsessing over that aren't your bias/bias wrecker?
For Skz, Minho(I blame @bethanysnow for helping fuel this lol) and a bit Han(the new curly hairstyle and the song covers he keeps posting on insta feel like a direct attack on me I swear)
❣ When did you first discover this group?
I'd been vaguely familiar with Bts for a few years, but it wasn't until my sister sent me some of their mvs back in 2020 that I started actively listening to their music.
For Skz, it was the summer of 2021, just after the 'Oh' mv was released, like I mentioned above.
❣ Have you ever been to one of their concerts?
No, but a girl can dream
❣ What are some of your favorite songs by the group?
Bts:
Paradise, The truth untold, Louder than bombs, Blood sweat tears, Zero 'o clock, Blue & gray, Pied piper, Jamais vu,
Skz:
Oh, Gone Away, Sorry I love you, Red lights, Chill, Cover me, Hello stranger, Waiting for us
Tagging @a-gayish-unicorn @crabby-libra @this-must-be-my-tardis and whoever else wants to play!
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solar-halos · 1 month
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i finished the umbrella academy s4. i am not amused. here are my thoughts (looong post incoming)
1. i don’t remember diego being so fucking annoying. actually that’s a lie he’s always been annoying but since he was hot i let it slide but now that he’s not treating lila right (how do u fumble a baddie THAT HARD) i think he should participate in the shut the fuck up challenge
2. “their uncle will pick them up” HUH? like obviously this timeline is different but you’re telling me lila has uncles (and parents! or someone! she was talking to some elderly couple before the party!). what does that mean for the others… were their mothers still killed in this timeline or did klaus live out his little amish dream, even if he wasn’t around to experience it? ykwim? like did they show up to this timeline and someone was like “omg where did u wander off to? i was looking all over for u!” and then it turns out it’s their sibling/uncle/whatever in that timeline and they just have to be like ah yes. i surely do know who u are
3. what they did to lila and diego was criminal!!! “she said she couldn’t get pregnant while breast feeding. but she could” dramatic ass reveal for no fucking reason. like get over yourself diego
4. ok i know they prob couldn’t get rays actor to come back but what the fuck do u mean he walked out. and how can allison afford that nice house when all she’s doing is being in commercials nobody wants. our girl has a BEAMER. also i thought they weren’t supposed to have phones or anything like that so why does allison have a vape lollll. not complaining bc that scene was funny to me but why and how
5. ughhh they were tryna set up lila and five SO BAD in the beginning. and even then they still gave off intense sibling vibes
6. ok maybe im just too american but the gun imagery was kinda not it for me. like idk i think the bit with santa claus coming out shooting at everything was supposed to be funny but idkk i think im just too sensitive bc i was like mkkk whatever not funny. also i know luther has super strength but even in s1 he still got majorly injured when that chandelier fell on him but now he’s fucking indestructible apparently?? like getting shot at and stuff?? what???
7. ok but that grandma loading her old timey gun while she turned to the siblings like O.O was funny i’ll give them that
8. speaking of guns wtf siblings are killing EVERYONE. like ik they started the apocalypse and everything but idek just the way they did it was so weird. like less detached/guilty and more like… triumphant? satisfied? idk but it had a different tone than even s3, i remember in s2 it was such an intense ordeal when allison made those two european brothers kill each other but this time they straight up mass murdered a bunch of ppl in a small town and were like B). like ok. like allsion mutilated that guy in front of her DAUGHTER and it was just chill. major tonal shift
9. “you just had to one up me” 1) you just killed a bunch of ppl diego!! 2) that is NOT the lila and diego i know. the real lila and diego would have started making out nasty style the moment lila killed that guy w her laser eyes. also wtf were the point of the laser eyes. she used them like twice and then that was it
10. with that being said all that affair stuff and recovery and addiction and relapse was getting so heavy. which ik is the point and the umbrella academy has always been heavy but like holy shit u GOTTA pick a struggle. is lila gonna groom five or is klaus gonna give claire trauma cos u can’t have both
11. speaking of claire… “would it help to remind u that we were just as shitty at her age” no u fucking weren’t. u could have breathed at ur british alien father wrong and he would have made u do drills until u puked. don’t play rn
12. why did they not trust the audience to pick up on the fact ben spiked their drinks. like we did not need a full on FLASHBACK. or like to be fully immersed in that scene, a tiny little flashback would have done
13. ok but why is this season so scary. like that train station made me paranoid
14. i will never forgive them for what they did to my girl lila. she used to serve CUNT
15. that british lady alien annoyed the fuck outta me
16. WHERE was pogo. and grace. they needed to find a way to bring them back. maybe they could have transported to a universe where the apocalypse happened and now the world was getting ruled by a planet of [gunshots]
17. why the fuck was diego acting like jennifer and ben weren’t linked in some way when all of s3 they alluded to the jennifer incident every other scene. i get it was supppsed to be so obvious even to someone who has ONLY watched s4 that jennifer and ben were linked so it was just a case of diego being stupid BUT that doesn’t work when it’s already been established that they all know jennifer played a part in ben’s death. hence calling it the Jennifer Incident
18. “they tried to address that in later scenes” they failed. they didn’t know how ben died, fine. but they knew jennifer had something to do w it. i’m tired of scenes that poke fun at diego for being stupid. he’s not stupid—he’s cocky
19. okay no but this season was SO gory. like. whatever they have guns this is a revolution but the guts? the intestines?? they wanted to be stranger things sooo bad
20. no but we need to talk about that. the monster thingie at the end was so stranger things and the guns and the military and everything it was like we were back in s3 (or whenever we met the russians)
21. LOL but that scene where diego finds out about five and lila was lowkey funny. this season was so meta in general
22. speaking of the holidays… i sure did love watching everyone sing christmas carols and walk around in the snow when it was hot asf in real time
23. i do like how many parallels there were to s1. like w viktor and reggie, it was very viktor and leonard in s1. and klaus getting kidnapped. although i was kinda tired of klaus getting abducted and his siblings not giving a fuck. i thought there was supposed to be growth there
24. okayyy but ben and jennifer were cute SORRY. “let’s get married” that would have worked on me. however being rude to me while i was at work WOULDNT have worked on me so maybe yall are right maybe we didn’t need a love interest this season
25. i did NOT expect them to actually drag out lila and five’s love story. other than the age gap (no matter how ur looking at it) you already knew it was gonna be bad as soon as they had their first kiss. i hate those multiple little open mouthed kisses that are literally just ALL lip and spit like that’s fucking gross if ur gonna stick ur tongue in my mouth u better do it by the third little :O we got going on there. and then five was giving boy. like literal boy. and lila is a literal goddess but a goddess that’s well into her 20s and the contrast was so sharp it rlly was giving mom and her caucasian child. i mean that bit about lila viewing it as survival vs five actually clinging onto it showed their different levels of maturity, but since it’s never specified if five is still a 50 year old man or just aging normally, his reaction rlly was such a teenage boy thing. “i’m gonna kill him” man shut the fuck up
26. ok no bc we need to talk about this. i think fives actor is my age—maybe even a little bit older—but i don’t see how anyone over the age of 18 is supposed to find him attractive. like idk it’s weird in the show but even creepier irl cos lila’s actor had to have known him when he was still a minor. why did anyone at the umbrella academy think we wanted this
27. anyway not to make this about myself but when i was writing the odesta longfic there were a lot of lore inconsistencies as we kept going bc i forgot some of the details and was too lazy to go back and read it sometimes, and i think that’s what happened this season. the most notable detail is when klaus covered his ears while everyone was shooting at each other. i was expecting some sort of vietnam flashback but like no. he was just there being normal about it, all things considered
28. “ex-squeeze me?” it wasn’t funny when klaus said it in s1. and it wasn’t funny here
29. alright i think that’s really all i wanted to say about the season tbh… like idk diego and lila starting a family made sense i guess and i know they were falling out of love (even tho they would never do that…) but i didn’t rlly feel any of the love w the kids. like even when lila stepped off the train at the last min and her daughter was banging at the glass it looked more like she was like “oh no :(“ and then just started poking at the glass. i don’t even think it matters that she didn’t fully know what was going on—if you’re a child and ur mom steps away in an unfamiliar situation, you’re gonna start to freak. especially w everything else that was going on
30. ok this is such a small thing to harp on but they abused the fuck outta that time skip font. like i don’t think they ever used it that much before now
31. now let’s get into the ending. this is how i would fix it:
we can keep jennifer. whatever. that thing they added at the very last second about her having a particle that causes the end of the world was… whatever. like i get it. they needed a way to explain the end of the world and that was the thing they used and even if it was very late to introduce such a (admittedly confusing) bombshell, at least it fits in with what we already know about this universe’s rules. magic and particles and marigold and whatever. jennifer is fine.
tbh when jennifer started feeling sick i was honestly thinking that they were gonna go the surprise pregnancy route even though they weren’t even fuckinf hinting at that i just have no media literacy. i wouldn’t have minded that tbh, like the monster transformation made more sense but imagine if we did a twilight ripoff for a second, except that jennifer and ben were both equally protective of the killer baby growing outside of jennifer’s womb (or in her womb… whatever. point is there’s a baby). i don’t think this is a good idea—if anything i think this is a shit idea. but something that’s always been so prominent in tua are the moral implications of what they’re doing, like with everyone wanting to kill harlan in s3 instead of letting the entire world die, and with everything that happened with viktor in s1. there was the whole “i can’t kill my brother” bit, sure, but everyone kinda didn’t rlly seem too enthusiastic about it.
actually the baby addition is actually a shit idea. i’m just keeping that part of the rant in bc we need SOME sort of moral dilemma that isn’t just viktor arguing w hargreeves and then his siblings dropping in later with opinions that don’t even seem that strong. everyone needs to have a strong opinion on SOME sort of moral issue that we wanna introduce—that, in a perfect world, we’d be building up to throughout the season—and then yeah whatever there can be an epic fight scene
i don’t watch/read a lot of time travel stuff, but from what i gathered, the timeline can never be restored once it’s fucked with. there has to be consequences, like with any story. and tua did address that—they tried restoring the timeline thousands of times—but i think they shot themselves in the foot there. time travel with a (somewhat) happy ending is possible—there just has to be something to lose, and it has to be something that isn’t nonnegotiable. claire was nonnegotiable, which is why i think they stayed in s3’s timeline for as long as they did
point is, i think they should have gone back to 2019. i mean i don’t think anyone really wanted them to die. i made a joke in s3’s rant that i would just give up, but lucky for me, i am not a fictional character in tua, so the fact they just die in the last five mins and we’re supposed to be ok w that makes the last three seasons pointless. like, actually pointless. what was the message here? why is the ending of the show painted as some sort of utopia just bc we got rid of the siblings? and why is five okay with that? i think him being on board w dying could have been an interesting route to take if they showed his relationship w his siblings consistently deteriorating (both on screen AND off screen) but they only rlly managed to do that with diego, and it was for something fucking stupid
ANYWAY. bring those fools back to 2019, but don’t make them totally happy. just give them something that makes them all just stay put, like how allison has claire (doesn’t matter which timeline. it could be from the fucked up timeline. i don’t think the cleanse would happen bc of that bc claire is only one person and not an entire fucking organization like tua or an assassination like jfk. so hell. might as well throw harlan and sissy in there for viktor. that makes lila and diego’s motivation really easy for staying put, cos then they have their kids. klaus is klaus and no offense to him but i think hes just gonna roll w the cards he’s dealt without trying to fight back, for better or for worse. then ben can have jennifer and since they love each other idk they just stick around. then five’s motivation for staying is that his family is alive and none of them want to leave and that’s good enough for him bc that’s why he time traveled in the first place
again… i don’t think what i came up with is any good. i just think it’s better than them all dying at the last fuckin second. i think this show relied on a lot of haha random xd humor at the beginning and they tried to keep that intact here but everything got so serious that i think them all dying rlly did seem like the only way out but.. it’s not. they could go back to the way things are as long as there were consequences. it would suck, and none of them would be as happy as they could be, but they know that’s as happy as they’re gonna get, so whatever. like, if we were gonna take the suicide route, we might as well gone the time loop route and gone back from the very beginning when five blinks back to 2019. i think that rly would have driven home the “this all would have happened anyway” point way better than them just being like guess ill die :) bc ughhh. no they wouldn’t. also they wouldn’t let lila leave bc she still had marigold in her but… what about her and diego’s kids?? they’re half marigold, and claire is a quarter, so… what’s up with that?
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lakesbian · 1 year
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thots on blake's backstory? it may not be real but it still affects his characterization so its worth asking i think
insofar as it did not literally happen in real life it's not real but insofar as he remembers & is impacted by it + his friends remembered & were impacted by it up until he got eated, it's real to him and them. i would not have pegged "cult survivor" specifically but yeah that checks. it's so funny (terrible for him) that miss grandma thorburn was like. hmm i need to make sure he really doesn't like hugs. and then hit him with the double whammy of "survivor of cult where manipulation into sex was used to keep men satisfied enough to stay & entrap women, and also he gets sexually assaulted after he leaves said cult juuuuust in case the cult thing on its own wasn't enough." it's like customizing a picrew but with intense human suffering instead of fun outfits. anyway, yeah, it checks. paranoia wrt other ppls motives, intense discomfort towards touch, funnily enough still not great at noting when something is too good to be true or someone is a little happier than they should be about smth. love how existentially horrifying it is for him that he's really tenacious and vigilant but in a way that leads him to disastrous pyrrhic victories rather than long-term survival and that's Explicitly bc gramma custom-tweaked his brain to make him the ideal meatshield who draws fire and then explodes. i'm really really endeared to the character trait where he Admits to himself that as much as he responds like a cornered animal (one w/ the worlds lamest oneliners) when threatened, if those threats are actually followed through on, he Will immediately start freezing and crying and pissing himself. like he's haunted by the memory of begging carl to take him back so that carl will stop, and he very desperately wants to Never be that person ever again, so even when he runs into someone as big & terrifying as conquest, he refuses to give an inch--he can't stand feeling like he remembers feeling back then--but he very much knows that if conquest called his bluff & started dragging him off he'd instantly turn into that person he never wants to be. his life sucks! both in terms of apparent memories and in terms of the Sheer Existential Horror of why he has those memories! devastating for the guy who has an entire Complex about the sanctity of his body & identity that literally none of his body or identity is his, it was all cobbled together from other people for the sole purpose of using him as a tool. even his own rejection of touch isn't his, it was forced upon him.
which. hm. i will say i think that's why arc 9 is paradoxically a form of catharsis & freedom--despite it being a horrific low point, it's not so much corruption of his body as it is him realizing that the changes haven't been corruption but what his body has been all along being revealed. the form he takes on when he's filled in by spirits is arguably more His than his old body was, because it's something he's gained thru his own choices & life experiences rather than the simulated ones that were forced upon him. he literally described himself as a doll, he's experienced the ultimate violation of autonomy thru being custom-manipulated to serve a purpose--choosing to fuck his own hand up and grow branches in place of false flesh is more Him than the original flesh ever was. his life is going to be awful forever and he will be reduced to next to nothing but it will be His nothing, i think.
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trashbag-baby666 · 7 months
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I’ll Always Be Around-Buck/Bucky
Summary: Gale is in his head and John pulls him out.
WC: 1,326
C/W: Referenced/Implied homophobia and mentions of divorce.
MOTA Masterlist!
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Gale sat in his car in the driveway in silence. He didn’t know where he wanted to go besides to Johns but he hadn’t answered yet. He just didn’t want to be at home considering his parents were raging at him for getting snippy with his Grandma at dinner. She always made sure to voice her strong opinion of how she disliked John so much and said that it’s just not right that two men are together.
Gale:
You’re at your dads, right?
John:
Yeah, Croz is here though. But I think he’s leaving when Bubbles is done with work.
Gale:
Can I come over?
John:
Yeah we just gotta be quiet bc the affair baby is sleeping 🙄💀
Gale put his car in reverse as he backed out of the long driveway. Now that John's parents were divorced and their house wasn’t a war zone all the time he had started letting people come over again; Although, he basically lived with the Clevens most of the time.
Gale knew how uncomfortable John's dad’s new wife made him. Some young secretary from his office that was closer in age to them than him. He also knew how much John disliked the fact that he now had a half brother. John had pretty much became a ghost in his own house when he was home. He could come and go and his dad wouldn’t even notice. But the times he stayed at his moms it wasn’t much better. Instead of being ignored she berated him all the time.
John jumped up from the couch as he heard the knocks on the door. He and Croz had been playing Fortnite and Stardew Valley all afternoon on John's new Switch.
“Hey handsome,” John leaned against the door frame. He could see in Gale's eyes that this was not the time and he turned his silly down.
“Did you have a good day?” Gale asked, kissing John on the cheek, following John into the house.
“Yeah, it was alright, me and Croz just played with the new Switch.” John hummed.
“Oh hey, Buck.” Croz waved then turned back to the TV where he was now focusing on Stardew Valley.
“Hey Croz,” Gale toed off his converse and kinda just slumped into John's arms. John wrapped his arms around Gales' waist holding the other.
“Is everything okay?” John whispered in his ear. John was worried about him; this was not typical Gale behavior. Something in his pretty blue eyes wasn’t glimmering either.
“We can talk later about it,” Gale nuzzled his head into John's neck taking in the familiar scent of his fruity aftershave. He placed a small kiss on his neck before pulling away and finding a seat on the couch by Croz.
“You wanna hear something funny?” Croz glanced over at Gale then back to the TV.
“Of course I do.”
“No are you gonna tell him about-”
“Yes, Leo threw up all over Bucky earlier. No joke. His dad left us with the baby for like an hour so he could go to the store or something. But he just started crying and crying.”
“Who? Bucky?” Gale let a small smirk pull on his face looking over to John. he stood with his arms crossed by the couch shooting daggers at Gale.
“Yeah, Bucky was crying, but anyway Leo is crying and Bucky holds him like this.” Croz grabbed a pillow and started patting it, “So he’s trying to burp him or something.”
“In my defense I’m doing what Mrs. Brewer taught us in child development.” John held up his hands in defense referring to the week long baby project.
“Bucky shut up I’m trying to get to the best part.” Croz waved his hand at the taller, “So he pulls Leo away and is just holding him out and Leo projectile vomited all over Bucky's shirt.”
John shook his head sitting down between them and smacked Gale on the leg lightly as Gale began laughing, throwing his head back, “Oh it's funny now Gale but it was your shirt.”
“My shirt?” Gale raised his eyebrows pointing at himself now praying that John at least tried to wash it and didn’t just throw it away, “Which shirt?”
“I don’t know the one from when you played Tennis at the country club?” John shrugged, knocking his elbow into Bucks. Gale felt a wave of relief washing over him that it wasn’t one of his nicer shirts he still wore besides when John would hijack it, “I’m never babysitting the affair baby again. I didn’t even want to watch him. My dad just kinda handed him off to me and left.”
“I can’t believe neither of us died, it was a long…hour to say the least.” Croz giggled, although all of this was at John's expense it did lift a bit of the anxious weight off of Gale's chest.
Bubbles had picked up Croz and the other two found their way to John's room. It certainly was in a cleaner state than it was the last time Gale had been in here. There was some clothes on the floor but not much else besides his cluttered desks of trinkets, mostly of little unicorns.
“So I’m sensing dinner didn’t go well?” John laid back on his bed.
“No,” Gale shook his head, picking up a pink ceramic unicorn Gale remembered buying him at a thrift store. It had always been his favorite unicorn of John's seemingly endless collection, “Can I borrow some clothes, I don’t know if I’m gonna go home tonight…if that's okay with you?”
“Yeah, for sure. Probably have more of your clothes laying around here somewhere.” John snickered sitting on his knees by his closet and digging through his dresser drawers. Gale just wanted to get out of the clothes he had been wearing all night and to just lay with John. He wanted to feel his hands on him and he wanted to breathe in his smell and just be so close to him.
“Thanks,” Gale hummed, taking the sweatpants and shirt John passed him, “Grey sweatpants so you can stare at my dick?”
“Maybe?” John shrugged, pulling Gales' brown sweater off of him.
“But no dinner was a disaster,” Gale sighed, pulling off his shirt and undoing his belt.
“Oh, I’m sorry.” John directed his gaze down to the floor, John had never been good in situations like this. He never knew what to say and rather opted for something funny.
“No it’s okay I’m kinda just ranting, I can stop though?”
“No it’s fine you know I’m just bad with words.”
Gale finished changing and fought a battle with himself before deciding to just take his contacts out and throw them away. He should’ve known he’d probably end up staying at Johns tonight but he didn’t even grab anything he just left.
“Can I lay on top of you?” Gale rocked back and forth on his heels, the only light in the room coming from John's lamp. Illuminating the right side of Johns beautiful
“Yeah, come on in here.” John motioned for him and lifted up the blankets for him. Gale climbed in resting his head on John's chest listening to his heartbeat for a moment. John wrapped his arms around Gale's waist and let a small toothy smile come out, “I love you.”
“I love you too,” Gale shut his eyes for a moment letting his focus be on John's heartbeat. He didn’t want to think about his day anymore; he just wanted to be with the love of his life.
“I don’t wanna talk about today.” Gale mumbled feeling one of John's hands come up and into his blonde hair, slowly carding his fingers through it.
“We don’t gotta talk about nothin’ at all, babe.” John held Gale close to him like he was a precious teddy bear.
“Okay,” Gale met John’s gaze, “Thank you for being here for me.”
“Anytime, Buck.”
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fireemblems24 · 9 months
Text
Scarlet Blaze Ch 15 (Final)
Last one, everyone! After this, I finally get to play Spiritfarer which I got on . . . Christmas 2022.
NARRATION
Last chapter. Finally. Killing so many people in this route is really awful. Especially since you just . . . don't in the other two.
I think the last chapter will take place at the monastery.
Oh, great, does this mean I have to protect Bernie's dad in this route? I hope Rhea kills him, like gets this badass cut scene where she cuts him down for perverting her faith by using it as a propaganda tool.
So TWSITD showed up and is attacking Rhea and the Empire.
They're mostly after the "beasts" (aka Nabateans? Or humans?)
I wish this meant that we teamed up with Rhea, but we know Edelgard would team up with TWSITD first.
Catherine and Rhea got a cool moment together though.
Yep, we have to protect Count Varley, gross.
MAP
No side battles! This final chapter will be super quick, which is nice.
I'm VERY curious what the Golden Deer students say after Claude's moment last chapter lamo.
And if any Lions mention Sylvain :((((
OMG, Ignatz is savage. He only cares about painting the battle. No mention of Claude.
Yuri wishes he could kill Varley instead of save him. Good for him. He really feels more suited for AG/AM/SS/VW than SB/CF/GW.
Well, at least Mercedes mentioned Sylvain. And Ingrid and Annette. Saying they died for what they believed in and admires them for it, since she could never.
Poor Ashe is having a crisis. Still had no idea wtf he's doing in the Empire's war camp. Honestly, this game made him so much more interesting.
Linhardt also has no fucking clue why he's here. I swear he does nothing but complain every map (in a funny way) and wish he was doing literally anything else.
Lorenz is more concerned about his future bc of Claude than worried about him. Man, guy really has no one loyal to him lol.
DOROTHEA & CASPAR C
I swear I did a much better job getting supports in GW and AG.
Caspar has a bunch of books, and Dorothea's horrified by the idea that he'll use them in training.
Caspar plans to read them. Dorothea teases him. Apparently Lin made similar comments.
Dorothea makes him promise not to hurt the books. A woman after my own heart.
Caspar's like, did you know my dad reads! Dorothea's like, yeah . . . how do you think he got his role if he didn't.
Dorothea tells a story about an unlearned commander who studied strategy in books and improved to become legendary.
The only stupid part of this is thinking you can read and understand complicated books in 5 days and become an expect in 5 days. For once, Caspar was the smart one being like, uh, I need more time.
MERCEDES & LYSITHEA B
This support is SB locked, but neither characters are Eagles. It may be the only support like that in the game. But, hey, new Mercie content, I'll take it!
Mercedes comes across Lysithea in the kitchen, trying and failing to cook.
The fruits she wanted to use are moldy though. Lysithea has an idea to use something else for the fruit - a sugar syrup.
Lysithea has dedicated her time to learning how to cook because of how good Mercedes' cooking was, so she credits Mercie for the sugar syrup, which she learned because of that.
Baking also helped Lysithea learn the importance of taking breaks.
Mercie calls her a wizened old grandma, lol.
They arrange a tea party.
SHEZ & LINHARDT A
It starts with Linhardt saying they haven't learned anything about Shez's powers. I wonder how funny this sounds if you get it after the special chapters.
Linhardt says it's find because the war is almost over, so there's less need and chance for the powers to go out of control.
Shez pretty consistently wants to continue working as a mercenary after the battle.
He also seems to have no desire to stay in Enbarr lol.
Linhardt wants Shez as a personal bodyguard. Honestly, not a bad choice.
Then Linhardt says something like "spending the rest of my life with some random bodyguard" and then makes an excuse to leave. so he wants to stick with Shez for life. It's kind of sweet.
EDELGARD & PETRA A
Their only support
Edelgard comes across Petra praying to Bigid gods. In Brigid they pray in nature rather than in churches in Fodlan.
Edelgard asks Petra why she's risking her life in the war because it's bad for Brigid.
So Brigid will only be freed if Petra remains alive.
To be fair, it's because she doesn't know the new leader. Still feels a bit icky for Petra.
Edelgard warns about "tricks" the enemy will use. She really has a beef with anyone using tactics.
Petra just says she's happy to fight and can't run while everyone else remains and fights.
Edelgard says she can't back out, which true, but she could've just not started one. But that's in the past I guess.
Overall, came across better than the Houses one where Petra didn't seem like an equal.
EDELGARD/LYSITHEA/HAPI PARALOGUE
My plan is to have Edelgard and Shez make the other two adjuncts and see if I can't beat the paralogue that way.
It's about TWSITD, which isn't surprising given that character list.
God, I've made SB Shez so fucking stupid. Never understanding anything. It's so funny.
So is this about Cornelia? They found one of her old hideouts.
I had Shez shrug about joining. Hapi got offended.
They're talking about Hubert. I wish he was here. He's my best unit.
I wish Cornelia showed up. She's so fun, but sadly she did not.
They didn't find anything. Hapi was mostly chill about it. Edelgard and Lysithea were more bothered.
Shez could show concern or change the subject. Obviously I made him change the subject since SB!Shez is not intelligent.
CASPAR/LINHARDT PARALOGUE
Like the last time, I just plan to adjunct Caspar and let Shez and Linhardt do all the work.
They're arguing if Caspar saw a ghost or not. Linhardt remains unconvinced.
Lamo, their dads showed up and Linhardt's dad called him a "fountain of positivity" when he brought up their could die any day.
Linhardt is also upset that he has to help.
We're hunting down Empire people who've turned against Edelgard.
I had Shez not want to go lol.
The main battle changed to defeating their dads. I don't think I'm supposed to take this paralogue seriously.
Linhardt had no fun.
Bergliez gave Caspar some gaunlets, and I could either be happy for him or jealous. I obviously picked jealous since it's fun to pick the dick answer lol.
FINAL BATTLE
Why is the S rank reward Edelgard's axe? This is the last battle, right? Is there some post game stuff? Because I'm so ready for this to be done (I don't think I'll do it).
Funny, Edelgard is the one defending the monastery this time, and Varley. Imagine your final battle being about protecting Varley. Ugh.
Only 40 points for the final battle?
Just killed Catherine :(
Cyril just showed up. Rhea's so concerned. Not looking forward to killing a child :((( He died too. This is by far the bloodiest route. I swear no one even dies in AG, and in GW it's only Sylvain's dad.
This can't be it, right? That was too easy. And Cyril as the final boss makes no sense. I'm betting it's a Thales and Rhea fight.
Rhea turned into a dragon. Badass. Glad she was the final boss poper and not Thales.
Spoke too soon. I think they're both here now.
Think I beat it. We're at a cut scene now. Thales is doing magic shit. Rhea attacked him and just ignored Edelgard and Shez like they weren't worth her notice lol.
Wait, that's it?
Rhea pushes Thales off a cliff? So RHEA's the hero??
There's no way they could've survived that - Edelgard. My girl, Rhea is a fucking dragon and Thales can warp. I have bad news from you. Also, Byleth survived a fall too so . . .
What happened to Dimitri? I don't think I killed Claude either?
Is that really it? The war just keeps going. The war just keeps on with no end in sight. Hahahaha. You mean I played how many hours for THAT? I'm going to laugh my ass off if all 3 routes end like this. What a cheap way to avoid killing any of the lords.
OMG. What a stupid ending.
Except for Rhea. She got the big hero moment lol.
I kept waiting for another battle. Esp since there's an S rank reward that's Edelgard's axe, so Idk what's going on.
OMG, this is going to take FOREVER. They're showing the MVP of every single side battle and not just the main ones. I'm only at ch 6.
There was a lot more variety in MVP than I thought. I thought it would be the Hubert show, but it's pretty varied.
Ok, so around ch 10 turns into the Hubert show. I like seeing battle data though, so I sat through it.
Ok, so you get a letter from the person you get a whistle from. Aww, I eventually won Hubert's trust, and he admits he and the army needs us. Glad I picked him.
Wait, no paired endings? That blows. I hope this isn't a new trend since Engage didn't do that either (I love paired endings)
Ok, so it looks like some stuff would carry over to another playthrough on this file. So, in the future, I'd replay AG over my GW or SB playthrough to at least get 2 on the same one. I can't see myself replaying SB or GW. It's not like the story would matter since I could just skip it, but the gameplay is pretty much the same, so why not play the route with my favorites and the most unit choices on top of that?
So you can carry over supports and even unit level. So I could play Dimitri as the absurd level he's at in level one if I saved over my AG file? Because that would be funny. Probably boring. But funny.
Still feels good. One down. Two to go.
xxxx
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hostilemuppet · 5 months
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So the first piece of art of yours that I saw was the comic where two of Bruce’s kids came out has trans to him and Branch tells him he’s a good dad and Bruce said he wishes their parents were supportive of him.
After that I came upon the one where JD decides to pierce his ear. And ends up with a date with a trucker.
And after that it was your first Floyd/Creek comics where Creek thinks he’s tricking Floyd but Floyd his aware and using him to get expensive stuff!!! It was between those three that I started following you.
While your style has changed since those little comics, I’ve always found your art amazing!!! And funny!!!
I keep coming back for more art and comics. I don’t read most of the asks you get so what ever happens on chapter 14 will probably be a complete surprise for me.
I do have a few questions from those first comics, have you ever considered drawing Bruce before he came out has trans? Maybe a little comic flashback of him coming out to his family? Also why was Branch so surprised? Didn’t he know Bruce was trans? And or was he… wait is Branch a he or a she? I forgot to ask before I didn’t understand in the story, if Branch came out has a boy or a girl. What I was going to say was Branch surprised that he wasn’t the only trans in the family?
As for the JD comic, have you ever considered drawing that date JD had with the trucker troll?
Also I think I once saw a Spotify playlist for Fleek with a cover of Floyd eating sushi from Creek’s back? Did I imagine that? Cause I can’t find that art on either of your twitter accounts.
Speaking of Creek’s back, what does he’s tramp stamp look like?
first of all tysm! thats very kind of you 😊 ill go through em point by point:
1- the comic where branch finds out bruce is trans wasnt related to the tdau at all, it was based on actual canon, so that version of branch wasnt intended to be a trans he/him butch he was just a cis dude. branch didnt know bruce was trans bc he wasnt even a year old at the point of the breakup and bruce had been living solely as a man for years, maybe as young as 13? (he wouldve just decided "can you call me a he? and grandma can you start buying me boy clothes at pop troll walmart?" i dont think he wouldve had the resources available to know what transgender even meant at that point) and never ended up telling branch before the breakup bc... well hes like 6 months old. and he doesnt need to know anything about "spruce"s body. and over the years bruce just kinda forgot that branch didnt know, which is why he mentioned it so casually
2- i did actually draw the troll jd had a date with! his name is clyde (although i think calling him clyde S.D. ale would be cute. like clydesdale, and also ale like the alcohol). this art is old atp so maybe ill give him a fresher coat of paint, just like im planning for jds manic pixie dream rock troll girlfriends who hate him
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3- i. yes. yes i did draw floyd eating sushi off creeks back and ass before 😭 based off a very good screenshot from captain laserhawk with rayman eating sushi off a cow woman. i drew it twice in fact, with the second being a redraw. here are both of them
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i considered redrawing it a third time bc i massively overhauled how i drew trolls but i think if i keep doing it itll stop being funny
4- creeks (NON CANON) tramp stamp, i think would be ocean themed with seashells and waves. maybe ill design creeks tramp stamp today, but again its NOT CANON its not actually a thing in the tdau. unless alex wants it to be
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nonuggetshere · 7 months
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I loved reading all of that. It's so funny how PK's sibs, and at points his dame, tease him. I love it so much 😆
It also got me thinking.
Would it be possible, in another AU (maybe like wayward royals or somewhere waaaaayyy down in FAaF), for Flower them to run into WLs Father. Or, maybe Flower gets separated and meets him by accident. Would he realize their kin or just see him as a territorial threat?
THANK YOU it's one of my favourites, writing family dynamics is so entertaining
AND FUNNY YOU MENTION THAT because I actually have an AU where they meet both of their grandparents! But first, some info about Quercus, then more info about the AU itself
This is gonna get super rambly bc I'm copy-pasting mine and Integrity's messages from discord
His name is Quercus and he is old as balls
He had Amanita when he was very very old too and these two were particularly close because she was the only surviving seedling. She's never seen his persona face to face but they talked a lot and he took great care of her (I think I already mentioned how roots grow up and how he's like with his children)
The kingdom he resides in is quite literally built around, on and into his giant ancient root body. He hasn't fully abandoned his former form like his daughter had and resides in a sort of in-between, which roots can do. His smaller form is connected to his body and is more residual from ages long past when he used to properly rule the kingdom. Now he's retreated from this role and many of the kingdom's peoples don't even realise that the higher being whose body they live in is still alive
He keeps his body beneath the ground, in a chamber he dug amongst his roots, where he mostly resides in and feeds on any poor schmuck that decides to venture into (and get lost in) the twisting, long tunnels amongst his roots
It's been a long time since he's communicated with anyone face to face, which he doesn't mind, roots aren't particularly social and are quite literally built to remain stationary with very little outside stimuli for a very long time
A mortal would have probably go insane if they spent their human lifespan's equivalent in isolation like he did but he's quite literally built different
And when I say ancient I mean ANCIENT
When he had Amanita he probably would be like the human equivalent of a 110 year old
But roots don't die of old age and he's strong and healthy so he's still kicking
The few AUs where he and Adamas meet they do NOT get along its actually so funny
Worsties in law
SO THE AU
I've mentioned that higher beings in my AU have the ability to sense who is their kin and it's especially strong in rootfolk, it's needed considering how they reproduce to avoid inbreeding
LONG story short, Flower needed a fucking break from Everything, ended up getting lost, ended up chancing upon their grandma and almost got their ass beaten by her before she realised they're her kin, after they left she had a bad feeling and decided to follow to keep an eye on them, they arrived at their grandfather's former kingdom and decided hey checking out these tunnels that supposedly nobody came out of alive would be a good idea, Adamas obviously sensed this ancient god in there and followed to keep Flower's dumb ass safe, bullshit ensues when she interrupts him excitedly introducing himself to the first grandkid he's ever met and asking about his daughter
And the two get into a massive argument. Because it just didn't occur to them that their children could EVER end up together
And Flower can't get a word in to explain
Adamas might not be a god but she's so willing to square up against one about this, Flower is HER kin so you can go fuck yourself you overgrown carrot
Flower: Fucking hell, now I get why my parents are Like That
Quercus: they’re clearly a root!
Adamas: they’re clearly a wyrm!
Flower: I—
Adamas: where’s their vines and roots and flowers than Hm? You’ve gone mad in old age
Flower: hey guys—
Quercus: Bold words from a mortal
Adamas: I might not be a god but I still don't mind kicking the ass of one!
Flower: OKAY! Alright! Enough fighting! Here's a wild idea; I am both of yours grandchild
Quercus: ...No
Adamas: Impossible
Quercus: Why would any of my children lower their standards so much as to take something as beastly as a wyrm for a partner?
Adamas, bristling: What could a root even provide for any of my clutches, besides sustenance after ripping into one? You're all soft, lazy pushovers
Flower: Fucking hell–
Flower: what if I ditched you both and left. What then. What if just leave
They just. Ditch their grandparents but of course Adamas goes to hunt them down
Adamas: Didn't your sire and dame teach you it's rude to sneak away like that?
Flower: I didn't sneak away, I even said goodbye, you were just too preoccupied with tour squabbles. Why do you keep following me anyways?
Adamas: It's not often I get to meet my grandchildren, let alone one's so careless or stupid enough to not only wander into another wyrm's densite but to also march into an ancient, hungry God's open maw. Somebody has to teach you self preservation because clearly whichever of my children had you failed at that
Flower: Oh, joy...
Adamas: …which one was it anyways?
Flower, who doesn’t even know PK or WL’s name: ….. the pale short one?
Adamas, also pale and kind of short: .......Do you have any idea how little that narrows it down?
Adamas, starting to list names:
Flower: I don’t know his name
Adamas: ??????????
Adamas: Are you serious?
Flower: ...Does the Pale King of Hallownest ring a bell?
Adamas: You only know him by his title?
Flower: It's a long story, don't dodge the question
Adamas: I suppose I've heard of him, wyrm kingdoms aren't that common nowadays- isn't he a god? One of my children is an actual god?
Flower: Wh- how did you hear of him but never realised he was your son? You have no right to judge me holy shit
Adamas: So it's decided, I'm going back to Hallownest with you and beating your parent's ass
Flower: HUH WHAT
Adamas: Fucker can't teach you how to take care of yourself and makes you use their title, I'm setting their ass straight if that's the last thing I do
Flower: WHO'S DECIDING THIS WE DIDN'T DECIDE SHIT I DO NOT AGREE TO THIS
SORRY GOT OFF TOPIC
Point is, Quercus would recognise Flower (and any other grandkid) and would ADORE them, especially if he knew they came from his little princess. But PK and his part of the family? Yeah uh. The old man does Not like nor approve of them
I think the only thing Adamas and Quercus would agree on is that Flower's parents kind of suck
Especially if they find out about the whole vessel thing
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hey dude, love the writing! your characterizations are so on point for em :0 what do you reckon the merc's hobbies are in their downtime? like knitting, golfing, stuff like that.
TF2 Mercs and Their Hobbies!
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I'm glad people think I'm good because that justifies the fact that this is what I do with my spare time 😭 (kidding) Also again mandatory mutual appreciation, love ya for that 🫶🏻 and ty for loving my writing, I really appreciate it <3
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This one's definitely got me smiling and kicking my legs bc something about the idea of these guys being happy and doing normal human things makes me happy.
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Demo knits! He also sews and crochets. This man is just a little grandma (affectionate). His mom taught him, and he just always liked it. It's calming, has definitely given the other Mercs blankets, and just claimed, "Oh well, I found it somewhere." Like it isn't in their well-known favorite color or subtly customized to them. I think he'd also be into most art. Painting and wood carving are two I think he'd fine interesting.
Engie- This man loves Legos. He has at least ten finished sets and about six unfinished ones lying around. He buys the adult sets for himself but has bought Pyro smaller sets so they can build together. Also isn't opposed to going fishing.
Heavy- Did you know he likes rock climbing? Turns out it's a lot easier to get into that hobby if you're strong. He's also a fan of hiking and swimming. Also very good at chess, he and Madic play a lot.
Medic- He loves music! He's good at it too, (I've seen others hc that he plays violin and please I love that, I love violin.) Along with the violin he kills on piano. It's actually really nice to hear piano coming from the lab and not screaming. Who knew? THIS. MAN. LOVES. TO. DANCE. He knows how to and loves to teach people. He specifically likes ballroom dancing, he can waltz, he can swing, if you can think of a dance he probably learned how to do it at some point.
Scout- Sports are probably the most obvious hobby I could pick for Scout, with video games coming in second. But I am a man who deviates from the obvious. He likes to bake and cook! Like I've seen people say this man can't boil water, and that's an insane take to me. Sure, it's funny, but this man loves his mom. Do you think he didn't bake and cook with her to help her out? He has a box of recipes that have been in the family for years. This man is killer when it comes to food, and I will die on this hill. (When he's baking, though, Pyro comes out of nowhere to "help." If any fellow bakers know how annoying it is to have a partner in the kitchen, you'll know how patient Scout has become, but he aurally doesn't mind Pyro baking with him after a while.) Don't ask him to do paintball with you! He loves it a bit too much.
Sniper- My man loves plants. He loves to garden. He has a little windowsill planter in his van. He grows little fruit plants sometimes and has a few cacti scattered around. He also has a bonsai tree, which he is meticulous with. You'd think this man would take up these hobbies to relax, but no. He is also insanely good at poker.
Spy- Really in to calligraphy, origami, and wine tasting. (Also, not really a hobby, but I hc that he can bartend if need be). He's just really into the "fancier." Hobbies that can also show off his art skills, also he likes wine so yk.
Soldier- Like Sniper, he's a really good poker player. He's definitely more into it than the other guys. He hates losing. He also does the traditional suburban while dad hobbies. He watches football and likes to grill. He's just a silly little American man.
Pyro- For the most part, they don't have a singular hobby they really do by themself. Scout and Engie just tend to include them in theirs, so they've never really had to figure out what to do in their downtime. But that doesn't mean they didn't find one eventually. They get into collecting! Specifically, bugs! They have at least two orchid praying mantis and one normal green one in a shadow box. Plus, they have a small collection on honeybees and even some scorpions and spiders (I know they aren't bugs, but I feel like most bug collectors have them too.) Engie went into Pyros room once because Pyro wanted to show off their collection and nearly fainted when Pyro showed off their favorite spider, it was a camel spider. (Look them up if you want but good God, they're so gross 😭)
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One of my favorites to write, super cute and wholesome idea. I smiled the whole time writing this.
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pumpkinsy0 · 10 months
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Tim Shepard (Tv series) Head Cannons
🟦 ▅ ▆ ▇ █ 🔷🔷🔷🔷🔷🔷🔷█ ▇ ▆ ▅ 🟦
This is if you seen the Tv show or not its fine :P
***he really is a good artist (DID YOU SEE THE DRAWING OF CALIFORNIA HE DID LOL,,,,,HE EVEN GAVE IT TO PONY HOW SWEET OF HIM😭🙏🏻)***
🟦 ▅ ▆ ▇ █ 🔷🔷🔷🔷🔷🔷🔷█ ▇ ▆ ▅ 🟦
***I wanna see what you come up wit! I LOVE YOUR HCS THERE AMAZING! AND INTERESTING YOU MAKE ME LIKE THE CHARACTERS MORE JUST BY THE HCS LOL***
But take your time!! NO RUSH THANK YOU🙏🏻♥
🟦 ▅ ▆ ▇ █ 🔷🔷🔷🔷🔷🔷🔷█ ▇ ▆ ▅ 🟦
Sorry to ask this! Its just over seen the show and in my opinion i was a great show I loved it! I LOVES IT EVEN MORE CAUSE OF TIM. HE REALLY IS MY FAVE!🙏🏻😭 (IM OBSESSED WITH HIM! NOT IN A WEIRD WAY GOD NO😭) I KIN WITH HIM SO MUCH I RELATE WIT HIM SO MUCH🙏🏻🙏🏻😭😭😭😭😭😭😭
Also your my favorite "OUTSIDERS" fanpage! Your my favorite person! (Love'ya :D )
🟦 ▅ ▆ ▇ █ 🔷🔷🔷🔷🔷🔷🔷█ ▇ ▆ ▅ 🟦
i havent seen the show in a while so what i remember is rusty and i dont think tim was rlly there a bunch so i only have like 3 hcs im srry BUT to make up for it i will go into depth about them kinda sorta, and by hcs i mean aspects of his character i liked in the show and just went “yea thats tim im including that in my tim most definitely” but i do have like 2 hcs
•hes a good artist
loved this part of his character in the show, i feel like he was one of those kids who would doodle on like desk n stuff like that, and maybe he was one of those kids who was into graffiti and he just liked designing things but had no real outlet, sometimes at night when he cant sleep or somethin or hes thinking of like idk gang stuff he draws cause it helps clear his mind, he also just thinks its funny to draw a lot of weiners, hes still a teen hes a lil immature, but i also hc that his artistic abilities kinda inspired angela and curly as well and they become artist in their own right
•hes close to pony
OK LOOK I LOVE THIS AS A FOIL RELATIONSHIP TO DARRY AND CURLY ITS GREAT, but HOW did they get close??? most likely after johnny and dallys deaths, pony spends more time w curly which means more time at curlys house which means seeing tim a lot more as well, at first tim would just pop in and go like “do yall want somethin to eat” and ofc pony was afraid at first but l as time went on, they just kinda clicked, maybe over art, bc each other using creativity as an outlet, or something or bc tim was like “o he is a bit fucked up actually” and took him under his wing
•hes somewhat involved w the curtis gang
mostly based off that one rumble episode, BUT i hc that after dallys death, tim became not close but definitely not a stranger to the curtis gang, he doesnt rlly hang out w them or anything like that, but he does see them quite a bit and talks to them, and especially teams up w them when they need it, think of tim as what dally was to the gang, the guy who came n went but was down w them, but in his own “yall cool but i got a gang to lead so ill help darry a bit when it comes to handlin yall” way if that makes any lick of sense
BUT FOR ACTUAL HCS OF MINE
•i hc that angela and curly werent there bc they were off w their grandma, y u ask??? man idk they love their grandma i guess who r we to judge
•perhaps it was around that time that angela and curly was gone that tim started getting closer to pony cause he kinda missed up and wanted someone to look after, he just got that “damn i need to b a guardian to a fucked up kid or else im gonna go insane my damn self” thing goin on and pony was there so
•i said it before but idc ill say it again, tims art is influenced by haitian art, maybe not like the style exactly, but the idea of it being vibrant, black ppl being shown using the actual color black, yknow that thing
•tim mostly draws ppl and landscapes, maybe he goes out of his way and draws like anatomy stuff wether its normal things or like horror
•he would never actually show his drawings to anyone, he rlly only shows pony it cause he knows pony wont judge, ofc angela and curly knows and have seen it but thats bc theyre nosey and poke around his things, he knows about it but they havent said anything so it’s whatever
thats all i could think of mb</33
and thank u im glad my acc beings some sorta joy, luv ya 2 anon🙏🏽🙏🏽
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seelestia · 6 months
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OMG THE NEW NAVIA THEME IS SO CUTE??? i think it's safe to say that you definitely cooked, lia hehe >:3 /lh /gen
anyways! that's pretty much what it is when it comes to college and frankly? i just wanna get it over with like literally the only highlight to it is seeing my friends and spending time with my boyfriend 😭 but!! a social science major sounds cool! i'd say you have some pretty good goals set in mind and you can always take up a minor if you want to pursue the others :> (i did consider having music as a minor) and sure! the courses depend on what you pick really and the college/professor, online is just about the same as in-person if you have a lot of reading on a pc to do tbh. english classes are well. kind of like the ones in high school but college-leveled. just make sure you give yourself enough time to do assignments bc they can be painful :"D
HELP LMAO??? okay that's true though, the fontaine quest definitely made a splash and we really had to dip our toes in the water with it huh? anyway thats kind of the thing, the only similarity between bedo and lyney is that they actively flirt with me in their own way, and its funny bc i usually try to find someone whose personality complements mine bc im generally the quieter one compared to both (ah yes a reality tv show for me HJEKAHD) also yea! i think both of them really do have traits that make them stand out and frankly i wish they got more screentime (also i have yet to watch the 4.6 trailer ehehe)
same here to you!! i'm always happy to rattle off of your hcs and i enjoy talking about our selfships as well hehe (*^ω^*) and i love it when bedo calls me his "sweet violet",,like the way he says it is just so endearing? like the pitch of his voice always becomes softer and more affectionate jsjdksndj (yk its funny, my boyfriend does the same thing with me bc his nicknames are unique to me as well)
also i'm throwing another ramble at ya: imagine wanderer or ayato surprising you with breakfast in bed HEHEHEHE
awh thats oki! like i said, i'm always happy to indulge your selfships since i enjoy hearing about them :> /gen. honestly i wouldn't be surprised if wanderer did knock you softly on the head for thinking the flowers were from yato ajjdkshd (nah just put the hairpin in before he gets a chance /hj /lh) also i forgot to tell u im a sucker for floriography so i methinks wanderer could give you camellias which represent everlasting love. the hairpin ayato gives you is unique in design and had it specially made for you alone :3
and i quote from my irl friend: "bouncing off the walls gf x completely stoic unmoving statue bf" HDJAKDHSJ NOT ONLY THAT SHE COMPARED HIM TO A PIECE OF FURNITURE BC OF HOW STIFF HE IS IN PICTURES (but hey i give him credit for a cute smile <3) and he is very much a pretty boy even though he tries to deny it until i accept that he calls me pretty too BUT YEA QUITE LITERALLY OPPOSITES ATTRACT anyway pretty much, not all relationships are like yk. sunshine and rainbows so thats why i feel very grateful to have a healthy one. if anything, we're just both trying to do our best to make one another happy but thankies hehe (also nw! i dont think u sound like a grandma, i just like hearing u ramble ehhehe)
also im not rlly sure why ppl think 20 is old either like dang, sure my back hurts on occasion but i'm not a fossil 😭
AHHH THANK U, VI!! so it seems you agree that i... baked? :3c /lh HAHAHA navia is so sweet and silly. i just have to make her my theme! (++ as a homage to her for carrying me in spiral abyss 🫣) since i do put in effort whenever i do theme changes, it makes me happy to know others like it <3
i'll have you know that i'm a true enabler of dad jokes & puns. throw 'em at me! which reminds me: how does albedo react to your jokes? for me, ayato just thinks it's funny that i find them funny (he pats me on the head afterwards - A+ for effort). wanderer is just the epitome of unimpressed and sometimes, he'd even pull on my cheek a little if the joke is extremely unfunny LOLLL. the only one who'd ever indulge me is mr. shikanoin heizou ( 。 •̀ ᴖ •́ 。) oh, woe is me!!! /lh
i see! ty for the perspective, vi <3 i'm gonna find it nostalgic to look back on this convo after i went to college. tho assignments really are a staple of uni life, huh? one of the times i thank highschool for instilling the habit of “work first, play later” in me. i imagine it's gonna be more painful however so i'll need to juggle rest & work 😭 hope you're holding up with yours!! <3
THAT'S CUTE!! i find it so funny that albedo himself is the paradigm for introverts but when it comes to flirting with people he finds intriguing, he's not here to play LMAO. how does he act 〜suave〜 so naturally?? smh i need those skills too /hj. lyney on the other hand... he takes it as an achievement if he manages to fluster you! the sleight of the hand is his bread & butter but he's good with his words just as well, no? voila! ✧ i am biting my fist UWAGHH. i am head over heels for the 'speaks to you / says your name in a softer voice' thingy but to witness it first-hand??? i'm so happy for you 🤭
WWHWHWHWH. ayato usually has the maids prepare our meals so he probably tells them to make it extra special. unfortunately, i'm more of a night owl than an early riser so by the time he brings the tray onto the bed, i'm just looking at him all groggy LOL. he thinks it's cute, taps my cheek and teasingly asks if this is all a ruse to get him to spoon feed me.... this man /aff. wanderer tho is a good cook so he does not play around with food or breakfast! but it's gonna take lots of coaxing to have breakfast in bed since “if it spills on the mattress, i'll demote you to the floor for a day.” i tell him about the existence of trays but he's still adamant. no fun 💔 /j
CAMELLIAS?! those happen to be one of my fav flowers!!! and the meaning too... i'm ahhdjwjejw /pos. he would tho!! wanderer canonically like wandering off in nature (oh, dearest sumeru), i think he picks flowers to bring back home. but sometimes, he'd rather observe them from afar: they're fleeting, after all. so he might as well leave them be to bloom to their fullest. yk.... i should buy some seeds these days and make a garden of our own. maybe it could be a surprise for him oooooo mhm mhm!! wbu?? does albedo or lyney indulge in making you breakfast in bed too hehe :3c (for lyney, i'm willing to bet lynette sponsored that breakfast /j)
NOT THE FURNITURE POSE HAHAA 😭
“smile!”
vi: 🌸🌷🎀🩷
bf: 🚪🚪🚪
/j but we appreciate the effort!!! i'm also not vv photogenic myself so i can relate badly with the furniture pose LMAO 😔 i prefer taking pictures of others instead! ayato is really photogenic. this is what happens when you deal with paparazzi /j & wanderer can be photogenic too but only in candid. he does not like staring at the camera. what a grumpy cat /aff +++ i saw the picrew you sent me! VI IT'S SO ADORBS AHHHH feel free to share more picrews of you & your f/o's anytime! i love love love them ☆૮꒰ˊᗜˋ* ꒱ა /gen !!!!
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ronanceautistic · 3 months
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When did you do your transition?
like transgenderally? erm. medically? im not. in a perfect world i’d like top surgery very much but even if i wasn’t famously shit scared of everything, i’ll never be able to afford it in a million years.
socially idk man. my parents never forced gender roles on me all that much so since i was a kid ive been dressing exactly the same ‘as a boy’. i started thinking about if i was trans when i was like 11 but never rlly changed pronouns or name or anything until like 2021 i think. but i’ve flip flopped so much that ive stopped like, being ‘out’ per say to real life people bc its just a hassle more than anything + i dont speak to them anyway. the only person i guess who knew and actually took it in was my grandma which honestly even though i don’t go by the identity i did when i told her, it was pretty awesome getting her acceptance before she died.
okay wow anyways. yeah point is the answer is either never or always. i’m don’t identify as anything gender wise im just a guy.
oh! i did this one thing one christmas though to see how many different names i could have addressed to me on christmas presents. i came out as a different name to everyone who was getting me something LMFAO. that was fun.
it is funny though that my dad is so #ally that he still calls me the name i went by for like one month in 2021 and i truly cannot be arsed to correct him three years later, we don’t talk anyway LMAO.
but yeah tldr everyone irl calls me my birth name and i am biologically the same as ive always been
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adelle-ein · 6 months
Text
it's been. quite a week "lace it's tuesday" yes.
it's hard and weird when a relative you don't get along with dies, and you're supporting everyone else in their grief while biting your tongue. it's hard because my siblings don't actually remember her and say things about how much she loved us that aren't based in reality at all. they even called her "grandma" which she never went by. it's not a coincidence that me and my oldest cousin were the two grandchildren who chose not to speak at the funeral (because we were always the barricade standing in front of the younger ones to shield them from her, and he was very much her least favorite to boot.)
she'd been dying for years to be clear. my aunt was speculating and thinks she probably had dementia for an absolute minimum of the last sixteen years, and her physical health has been awful my whole life (she'd been on and off hospice for about five years? they'd put her on and then she'd live too long, they'd take her off, etc.) she just. would not die. like i think we're all really relieved she died, even the family members that really did love her, she just had no quality of life or anything anymore the last couple of years. but yeah hospice called and said she was going to die a week ago and they were actually right this time.
she was mean and horrible long before dementia though. the story my dad told at the funeral just made me think of how awful she was. and some of the other "funny" stories my family shared just horrified me. and it was the smallest funeral i've ever been to, we only just had a minyan. because nobody wanted to come because she had no living friends and drove off a lot of her family. some she outlived, some she just abused. the only person other than her sons' families who came was my great-uncle on my mother's side, who isn't related to and didn't know grandma (they might've met at weddings and b'nai mitzvahs if that?) but lived nearby and decided to come. and while i'm not his biggest fan it was very nice of him (and the only reason we had a minyan and didn't need to grab random funeral home staff. sigh.) we had a rent-a-rabbi bc my aunt and uncle's was booked and he kept trying to come up with like...things to say about her? generic grandma sentiments. that were generally wrong.
my aunt wanted us to divide up a box of grandma's costume jewelry she had (apparently she's had it for years but was too scared to divvy it up until grandma actually died since grandma has yelled at her for gold digging before. Yeah. goes without saying but aunt is not a gold digger in any way) and i'm thinking of the stuff i took as gifts from her, not from grandma, because like. i don't want stuff from grandma. but a lot of it is stuff my aunt made and stuff that's genuinely cute and i'll enjoy having i just have to like. separate it. and i got to see oldest cousin for the first time in years so that was nice. and my uncle's doing the best i've ever seen him for a number of reasons and my aunt seemed to be doing well too (and she and cousin both made me dairy free mandelbrot loaves haha) (and she addressed both me and my brother as graduates which is really sweet bc most family is straight up ignoring my graduation so far)
but you know. things are complicated life is complicated i'm gonna rant to my therapists and bite my tongue in front of family bc it really is the right thing to do
i am exhausted though after the stress of rushing out of state rushing to funeral rushing back planes cars being in florida which is my personal hell, blah blah, Travel Shit and concurrently dealing with some medication-obtaining issues and worrying about my conferral and falling behind on work and just not having time for therapy. sigh
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