#get ready for a rollercoaster folks

[drchucktingle]

the curve

somehow ive found myself in a position where folks come to chuck in times of strife for encouragement. lets get the big part of this conversation out of the way LOVE IS STILL REAL and that is the thing to remember. that north star remains. today there is more to talk about though

existence pushes towards love community and freedom, because CREATION is what we were built to do and creation thrives with these things as fuel. IT GETS BETTER. LOVE IS REAL. however this change comes in up and down waves. its not a straight line and should not be expected to be

some of these waves are short and small, and some of the slopes are years or decades long. there is no mincing words here, we are entering a massive downward wave. the implications are huge and it is okay to mourn that. FEEL THOSE FEELINGS. it is an important part of the ride

the most telling sign post on our slope is this: tromp won the popular vote (or likely will when the votes are done). we can talk POLITICAL STRATEGY all day about electoral college or who should court the center or the left and on and on but ultimately THIS is the real story

to me it signals a TRUE cultural shift. likely conservatives will have presidency, senate, house, and supreme court. WHAT A GIANT SLOPE. HOLD THE HECK ON because we will be riding it for a while, deep into the pit of the void. hold your buds tight, prove love at the local level

but heres the thing, MASSIVE waves have happened before. theyll happen again. mind numbing slopes into the abyss and great soaring leaps into the sky. in fact the inertia almost ALWAYS causes them to happen right after each other. hippies or punks back in the day, buckaroos now

politically we were trapped in a basically fifty fifty trot for a long time, but it was not always like this (just look at old election maps what the heck). to be honest, tromps map looks like one of those old maps right now. and DANG did COUNTER MOVEMENTS blooms from those times

in other words, THERE WILL BE A COUNTER CULTURE MOVEMENT THAT WE HAVE NEVER SEEN BEFORE IN OUR LIFETIMES. you are now a rebel for the resistance and the wave that will swing back towards love will awe us in ways we cannot even imagine yet.

but for now, feel those feelings, mourn, prove love, stay safe. do not let the hope i am espousing feel like a distraction from the very real, even deadly consequences of the terrible pit we are plummeting into. it is a horrible day, and FUTURE HOPE does not diminish that, BUT

get ready because that counter culture wave is coming and YOU are a part of it. if you want to shout HECK OFF DEVILS then shout it LOUD, if you want to cry then cry HARD, if you want to love then love with your WHOLE HEART. thats the start of the movement that we dont know yet

when that movement takes shape we will feel the inertia of the curve and it may make us sick from the rollercoaster turn, and that pressure will be uncomfortable and scary, but THEN buckaroo, we will soar, and ill be so dang glad to be holding on tight with you when we do

[ghoulsbounty]

The Unexpected pt 1

DBF! Wade Felton x Fem!Reader

Warnings: smut (18+), car sex, cowgirl, semi-public sex, heavy flirting, p in v, bad dates, mutual pining, angst, age gap (reader is early 30's, Wade is 48)

Word Count: 6.3K

A/N: Anon! ALL the love for Wade Felton! There isn't enough for him and I've loved writing this. Yes this gif did inspire the first half. Here is the first part, I hope you enjoy! I’d love to know what you all think to this, and feel free to send me more requests 💌

The anticipation had been building all day, excitement bubbling up within you like a shaken soda bottle ready to burst. You'd meticulously chosen your outfit, practiced your smile in the mirror, and rehearsed witty conversation starters in your head. After weeks of chatting online, you were finally meeting him in person—the man who seemed to check all the boxes, the one who promised to sweep you off your feet and make your heart race.

But as you sat at the cozy table near the window of the trendy restaurant, watching the world outside blur by in a flurry of raindrops, you couldn't shake the sinking feeling in your stomach. Time ticked by slowly, each passing minute punctuated by the clinking of cutlery and the murmured conversations of other diners. You checked your phone for what felt like the hundredth time, hoping for a message, a sign that he was on his way. Yet, there was nothing.

When he finally walked in, you tried to mask your disillusionment with a forced smile. He shrugged off his navy sports jacket with casual indifference, his eyes darting around the room as he muttered excuses for his lateness—a familiar refrain of traffic jams and inclement weather that did little to appease your growing unease.

As he settled into his seat opposite you, his gaze flickering over the menu without so much as a glance in your direction, you couldn't help but feel a pang of disappointment. This wasn't how you had imagined your first meeting—a whirlwind of laughter and chemistry, a spark igniting between you from the moment your eyes met. Instead, there was only awkwardness, an intense strain in the atmosphere between you.

You tried to make conversation, to salvage what little remained of the evening, but his responses were curt, his attention already drifting elsewhere. The giddiness you had felt in suspense of this date had long since dissipated, replaced by a sense of defeat and heavy regret. As he snapped his fingers to get the waiter's attention, you realized with a sinking feeling that this was not the beginning of a grand romance, but rather the end of a fleeting fantasy.

Your mom had been relentless in her encouragement to dip your toes into the dating pool. "You need to get out more," she'd insist, her voice a blend of exasperation and eagerness. "Don't spend every weekend holed up with your old folks." Though her intentions were good, her words often felt like a gentle push tinged with a mother's anxious plea.

At first, the idea had appealed to you—a chance to break free from the familiar routine, to explore new possibilities, to embrace the thrill of romance. The thought of being wined and dined, engaging in lively conversations with potential romantic interests, had sparked a sense of excitement within you. It all seemed infinitely better than the quiet evenings spent at home.

However, what you hadn't bargained for were the rollercoaster rides that awaited you in the tumultuous world of online dating. Each date often began with high hopes and slight apprehension but ended with you feeling more disheartened than before. The profiles rarely matched the personalities, the conversations fell flat, and the chemistry was frequently non-existent. The thrill of romance quickly turned into a series of awkward encounters, leaving you longing for the predictability of Scrabble nights with your parents.

Throughout your twenties, your focus had been singular: advancing your career. You'd packed your bags and moved across the country, chasing opportunities that promised to elevate your prospects. Along the way, there were relationships, some fleeting, some more substantial, and your fair share of dates. But whether it was the adjustment to life back in your hometown, or the distinct pool of available men in Raleigh, dating since your return had been anything but smooth sailing.

As you swept your gaze across the bustling restaurant, a familiar figure caught your eye. There, perched on a stool at the bar with an air of casual confidence, sat your dad's best friend. His presence seemed to command attention, and when his eyes met yours, there was a knowing glint that passed between you. With a hesitant lift of his fingers, he offered a greeting, and you responded with a subtle flick of your hand before discreetly returning it to your lap. A small smile tugged at the corners of your lips as you acknowledged him, a wave of nostalgia mingling with a hint of embarrassment.

Memories flooded back—summer barbecues filled with laughter, late-night advice sessions during tough times, and the unspoken bond that had grown over the years. It had been a while since you'd seen him, since you'd returned to your hometown. Despite the warmth of these memories, you'd kept your distance, declining invitations to join your parents at his recent back-yard cook-outs. A sense of failure and shame had held you back, the weight of unmet expectations and dreams unfulfilled lingering in your mind like a stubborn shadow.

Wade Felton sat at the bar, his casual confidence an anchor in the sea of strangers that surrounded you. His eyes, a mix of concern and curiosity, held a spark of recognition that sent a ripple of reassurance through you. It felt oddly comforting, the familiarity of his face amidst the unfamiliarity of the restaurant.

As you glanced his way, Wade raised his glass of bourbon in your direction, a subtle quirk of his eyebrow accompanying the gesture. It was a small but significant moment. Was it an invitation to join him in a drink, or perhaps a silent acknowledgment of the less-than-ideal situation unfolding at your table? You couldn't be sure, but the gesture warmed you nonetheless.

The evening had not gone as planned. Your date, Tom, was self-absorbed, endlessly droning on about his workout routines and expansive vinyl collection, without so much as a pause to engage you in conversation. You felt trapped, a prisoner of your own politeness, listening to him with feigned interest while your thoughts drifted to the man at the bar.

But now, with Wade's gaze fixed on you, you felt a spark of defiance. You'd had enough of enduring dismal dates out of sheer courtesy. His mere presence ignited a desire to reclaim your evening.

Summoning your courage, you interrupted Tom mid-monologue. "Can I stop you?" you said politely but firmly. "This isn't going well, I think you'd agree."

Tom looked taken aback, his expression shifting from confusion to resignation. He nodded slowly, his eyes dropping to the table. He reached for his wallet, extracted a few notes, and placed them on the table. "You're right," he admitted bluntly, "you were much more interesting when we talked on the app."

You seethed inwardly but maintained your composure, offering a tight-lipped nod as you retrieved your share of the bill from your purse and placed it on top of his contribution.

"I'm taking this," Tom declared, grabbing the bottle of wine as he rose from his seat. Snatching his jacket, he glanced back at you. "Good luck," he added curtly before exiting the restaurant, leaving you alone at the table.

With a heavy sigh, you gathered your purse and the plate of food you had ordered. Determination fuelled your steps as you navigated the crowded restaurant, heading towards the bar where Wade sat, his sturdy frame dominating the space. As you approached, the soft glow of the overhead lights cast a warm halo around him, illuminating him like a beacon in the dimness of the bar.

Setting the plate down on the polished counter, you pushed it towards Wade with a gentle yet purposeful motion. With practiced ease, you hoisted yourself onto the stool beside him, the worn leather creaking softly beneath you. Leaning in, you met his amused gaze with a playful twinkle in your eyes.

"Did you order the Korean tacos with a side of a woman who is apparently more fun on a dating app than in real life, Mr. Felton?" you quipped, your words laced with a touch of self-deprecation. A small smile tugged at the corners of your lips as Wade's laughter filled the air, his easy-going demeanour a welcome contrast to the tension of your failed date. With a casual grace, he turned to face you, one arm resting on the bar as he met your gaze with genuine warmth.

His laughter was like a balm, soothing the sting of the evening's earlier disappointments. "I don't like to pry, but it didn't seem like you were getting a word in edgewise," he remarked, shaking his head in amusement. He signalled to the bartender and ordered you a glass of white wine. "White, right? If I remember, red gives you headaches," he added with a knowing smile.

You nodded appreciatively, a wide smile spreading across your face at his thoughtfulness. The way he remembered such a trivial detail about you struck a chord, touching you in a way you hadn't expected. It wasn't just the wine; it was the recognition, the familiarity in the gesture that made you feel seen.

As you brought the glass of wine to your lips and took a sip, a sense of calm washed over you. The crisp, cool liquid steadied your nerves, the taste familiar and soothing. The ambient noise of the restaurant faded into the background, leaving just the two of you in this unexpectedly intimate bubble. The warmth of the moment wrapped around you, making this unfamiliar yet oddly comforting situation feel like a safe haven amidst the chaos of your evening.

This felt like a decisively grown-up situation, and while you knew you were perfectly capable of handling it, there was still a sense of novelty to the experience. Normally, around your dad's friends—people you had essentially grown up with—you couldn't help but feel like a child, forever relegated to the role of the kid tagging along. But here, sitting at the bar with Wade, it felt different. Two adults, sharing a drink and engaging in conversation as equals. You couldn't help but wonder if he felt the same way, or if perhaps this was just a figment of your imagination, a fleeting moment of perceived maturity.

"Are you waiting for someone?" you asked, your curiosity piqued as you tried to manoeuvre yourself gracefully through the conversation with the older man. 

Wade's gaze drifted for a moment, his eyes flickering briefly to his phone before returning to meet yours. "I was," he admitted with a sigh, the faintest hint of disappointment colouring his tone. He lifted his phone from the bar to check a message. "But not anymore. Seems like I got stood up."

You noticed a flicker of frustration in his eyes, a brief moment where his façade faltered before he shrugged it off with a nonchalant gesture. The soft glow of the bar lights bathed his face in a warm, amber hue, accentuating the contours of his features and the subtle lines that spoke of a life rich with experiences.

"That's rough," you sympathized, your voice soft as you raised the glass of wine to your lips, offering a brief reprieve from the tension in the air. You savoured the taste, allowing it to linger on your palate as you considered the shared sense of defeat you felt with him. "Seems like we're both having a night of disappointments," you remarked, the words carrying a weight of understanding between you. 

Wade chuckled, a deep, reassuring sound that made you feel at ease. His eyes crinkled at the corners, reflecting the light. "Yeah, it looks like it. But hey, at least we can keep each other company now."

You couldn't help but silently thank the woman who hadn't shown. Since you were old enough to appreciate the opposite sex, you'd harboured a secret admiration for the older man. In your awkward late teens, you likely made it painfully obvious, your infatuation spilling over in clumsy gestures and stammered words, until your first experiences with boys taught you the nuances of approaching them with an air of sensuality.

But even as you matured, your admiration for Wade remained steadfast, a silent longing that lingered beneath the surface. You'd often caught yourself stealing glances at him during family gatherings, marvelling at the way his laughter seemed to fill the room and the easy confidence with which he carried himself.

Now, as you sat beside him at the bar, you couldn't shake the thought that fate had intervened in the form of a missed date. The anticipation of what could unfold between you hummed in the air, mingling with the soft murmur of conversation and the clinking of glasses. Despite the unlikelihood of him ever seeing you as anything more than his best friend's daughter, you couldn't resist the urge to inch closer on your stool until your knee brushed his, a subtle yet deliberate gesture that spoke volumes of your unspoken desires.

"So, what were you looking forward to more, the company or the food?" you asked, your tone light and playful.

He leaned back slightly, the leather of the bar stool creaking under his weight as he considered your question. "A bit of both, I suppose," he said, his voice low and thoughtful. He ran a hand through his hair, a gesture that betrayed a hint of vulnerability beneath his usually composed exterior. "But if I'm honest," he continued, his gaze softening as it met yours, "good company always trumps good food."

There was a sincerity in his words that made your heart flutter, a comforting heat enveloping you you at the genuine sentiment behind them. With a thoughtful expression, you pursed your lips, considering his response. "I agree," you finally replied, a playful glint in your eyes, "but you haven't tried these tacos yet."

With a mischievous smile, you slid the plate over to him, the aroma of the savoury dish filling the space between you. Wade chuckled, a deep, resonant sound that reverberated through the air, his laughter infectious as it mingled with the ambient noise of the busy bar.

"You're right," Wade agreed, his tone light as he picked up a taco and broke it in half with a satisfying crunch. He held out a piece to you, a twinkle in his eyes as he willed you to accept it with a smile. "I can't be too quick to judge, can I?" he added, his expression teasing.

You accepted the taco from Wade, feeling a rush of excitement as his fingertips brushed against yours, sending a shiver down your spine. His eyes remained locked on yours, a silent exchange of understanding passing between you as he brought the food to his lips and took a bite, a soft hum of appreciation escaping him.

Following his lead, you savoured the explosion of flavours from the taco, each bite a delightful symphony of spices and textures that danced on your tongue. "Damn, that's a good taco," Wade remarked, a satisfied smile spreading across his face as he turned his attention back to you. His eyes held a warmth that matched his smile, and there was a subtle yet unmistakable longing in his gaze. "Still prefer the company, though," he added, his words laced with sincerity and a hint of something more, leaving you with a fluttering sensation in your chest.

The moment felt unexpectedly intimate, the simple act of sharing food creating a connection that seemed to transcend the confines of the respective roles you held in each others lives. With each bite, the initial awkwardness of the evening melted away, replaced by a growing sense of ease that you hadn't felt in a man's company in a long time. 

When Wade finished with a lick of his fingers, a jolt of electricity shot through you, igniting a flurry of thoughts and emotions. You inwardly scolded yourself, urging restraint and reminding yourself of the countless reasons why anything beyond what you had with Wade was impossible. After all, there were too many factors to consider: your dad, the significant age difference, the intricate web of familial and social dynamics that bound you both.

"So, tell me," Wade continued, pulling you from your thoughts as he leaned back slightly against the bar, his expression relaxed yet curious. "What have you been up to since coming back to town? Besides enduring disastrous dates, of course."

"Well," you began, fingers idly tracing patterns on the stem of your wine glass as you mulled over your response, "besides dodging the pitfalls of modern romance, I've been navigating the murky waters of post-grad life and a floundering career." You paused, allowing the weight of your words to settle before continuing. "Moving back home has been... an adjustment, to say the least. But I'm slowly finding my footing again."

Wade nodded, his gaze gentle and attentive as he listened to your words. "I can imagine," he replied, a hint of empathy in his voice. "Transitioning back to small-town life after being away for so long must be quite the challenge. But it sounds like you're handling it with grace."

You couldn't suppress the smile that tugged at your lips, appreciating his understanding and the fact that he always knew what to say. "Thanks," you murmured, feeling a heat rise to your cheeks. "And what about you? What's been keeping you busy these days?"

"Work, mostly," he chuckled, his eyes gleaming with a hint of amusement as he reflected on his daily endeavours. "And trying to keep up with my girls. I was not prepared for teenagers," he confessed, shaking his head with a wry grin, "but your dad's been a real help, keeps me on my toes."

"I bet he does," you replied, the mental image of your dad as the lively and enthusiastic accomplice in Wade's parenting adventure brought a smile to your lips. "He's always been good at that."

Wade nodded, then with a playful wave of his hand, he dismissed the topic. "Enough about him," he added with a laugh, and you felt a wave of relief wash over you, grateful to steer the conversation away from your father. It felt odd, almost wrong, to talk about him while your leg was pressed against Wade's under the bar, a contact he made no effort to break.

"So, what are your plans now that you're back?" he asked, his eyes searching yours with genuine interest. "Any grand ambitions?"

Resting your chin on your palm, you observed the dance of light on the surface of your glass, captivated by the intricate patterns it wove. "Honestly," you began, your voice soft yet tinged with a hint of vulnerability, "I'm still figuring it out." You glanced up, meeting Wade's gaze with a mixture of uncertainty and resolve. "I had these grand plans for my thirties, you know? But I guess the universe had different ideas."

The weight of your words hung in the air, yet, despite it all, a small, determined smile graced your lips. "But hey," you continued, a flicker of energy lighting up your eyes, "if I'm a grown adult now, living under my parents' roof, I might as well make the most of it, right?" You chuckled softly, the sound carrying a hint of conviction. "So, I'm getting out and trying to have a little fun, seeing what else the universe has in store for me. I guess I'm just taking it one step at a time."

Wade's eyes gleamed with a sense of prideful understanding as he listened intently, nodding along in affirmation. "That's a good approach," he remarked, his voice carrying a comforting resonance. Each word seemed to wrap around you like a reassuring embrace. "Sometimes, taking it one step at a time is the best thing you can do. And hey," he added, a smirk tugging at his lips, "there's nothing wrong with a little fun along the way." 

The seemingly innocuous exchange between you in the intimate ambiance of the bar carried implications that sent shivers of excitement down your spine. With his gaze locked onto yours, brimming with sincerity, you felt a newfound boldness surge within you. "Sometimes, the best things can happen when you least expect them, right?" you posed, your voice laced with a hint of playfulness, yet underscored by a genuine curiosity, eager to explore the depths of this burgeoning connection.

He chuckled softly. Glancing down at his drink, he lifted the glass and met your gaze once more. "To the unexpected," he said, his voice low and inviting.

You brought your glass to his, the crystal clinking together in a toast that felt like a promise. "To the unexpected," you echoed, a smile spreading across your face as the moment hung between you.

As you both took a sip, the background noise of the restaurant seemed to fade even further, leaving just the two of you in your shared bubble. The possibilities of the evening ahead had your heart pounding against your chest, your mind reeling with the idea that perhaps your fantasies were about to come true. You glanced at Wade, noticing the way his eyes sparkled with a mixture of amusement and curiosity.

The buzz from the wine spread through you, mingling with the excitement of the moment. You set your glass down, your fingers grazing his on the bar top, sending a jolt of electricity up your arm. He didn't pull away; instead, he leaned closer, his gaze locking onto yours with an intensity that made your breath catch.

"Can I take you home?"

The drive was silent except for the blues that crooned lowly on the radio, the tension between you palpable. Each glance, each accidental touch, only heightened the anticipation. When he finally pulled into his driveway, the reality of what was about to happen hit you with full force.

Wade turned off the engine, and for a moment, the only sound was the rain tapping softly against the roof, creating a cocoon of intimacy around you. He turned to face you, his eyes filled with a mix of desire and uncertainty. "I think I should walk you to your door," he conceded, his voice laced with sincerity.

A wave of disappointment washed over you at his words, the excitement you previously felt now ebbing away as you contemplated the end of the evening. Your gaze shifted to your house, standing in quiet solidarity beside his under the silvery glow of the moon. Every window remained veiled in darkness, the roar of the engine hadn't woken your family or his.

You hesitated, reluctant to let the evening come to such an abrupt end. With a fleeting glance back at Wade, you searched his eyes, hoping to uncover any clue about his true desires. The unspoken tension between you seemed to thicken, casting a heavy, almost suffocating atmosphere around you. Summoning your courage, you finally voiced your question. "Is that what you want?"

Wade sighed deeply, his hands sliding over his jean-clad thighs in a gesture of frustration. He looked up at the ceiling, the muscles in his jaw tightening. "No, it's not," he admitted, his voice a hushed murmur. "I want you, but I can't have you."

Your heart soared at his confession, a thrill coursing through your veins. Your fingers tingled as you unbuckled your seatbelt, turning inwards to face him. "Says who?" you challenged, your voice soft but steady.

He looked at you then, truly looked at you, as if seeing you for the first time. The rain outside intensified, drumming a steady rhythm on the truck roof, making the interior feel even more intimate. The raw intensity of his gaze made your breath catch in your throat. The dim light from the streetlamp cast a soft glow over his rugged face, highlighting the conflict warring within him.

"Says everyone," he finally replied, shaking his head as if trying to clear his thoughts. "Your dad, our families... It would be wrong."

"Does it feel wrong?" Your question hung in the air, charged with uncertainty. With a tentative touch, your fingertips traced a path along Wade's thigh, the fabric of his jeans rough against your skin. His breath caught in his throat, a flicker of surprise dancing in his eyes, mirrored by the vulnerability in your own. In the dim light of the truck cabin, every detail seemed magnified—the furrow of his brow, the intensity of his gaze, the subtle quiver of his lips. "Does it feel wrong?" you repeated, your voice steady, yet laced with a newfound determination. "I know what I want, and I think you do too."

His eyes darkened with a mix of desire and hesitation as reached out, his hand trembling slightly as it cupped your cheek. His thumb brushed lightly over your skin, sending a shiver down your spine. You leaned into his palm, closing your eyes for a brief moment, savouring the warmth of his touch.

When you opened your eyes again, the uncertainty in his had given way to resolve. He leaned in slowly, his breath hot against your lips, filling the small space with an intoxicating air. "If we're doing this," he whispered, his voice filled with raw emotion, "we're doing it right."

You weren't sure what  he was alluding to but nodded regardless, your heart pounding as his lips finally met yours. The kiss started tentative, sweet and gentle as if testing the waters, but quickly deepened into something more urgent and demanding. His other hand released him from his belt before finding its way to your waist, pulling you closer. The rain outside continued to pour, but all you could feel was the heat of his embrace and the electrifying connection that surged between you.

His lips were soft but insistent, exploring yours with a hunger that mirrored your own. The taste of bourbon lingered on his tongue, mingling with the sweetness of yours. You threaded your fingers through his hair, pulling him closer, losing yourself in the moment. You slid the hand still on his thigh higher until your palm laid flat over the growing bulge in his jeans. You gave him a firm squeeze, and he tore his lips from yours as he eyed you warily. 

"We can't, not here," he said, glancing behind you, his eyes flitting between your house and his.

You followed his gaze over your shoulder, taking in the proximity of both houses, each window still dark and quiet. Turning back to him, you asked softly, "Are the girls home?"

"Yes," he sighed in defeat, his body still tense under your touch. "I can get us a room."

You shook your head. "I don't want to wait any longer," you told him, voice laced with persuasion as you leant in to plant a soft kiss at the corner of his mouth. "I've needed you long before tonight," you told him.

"Gotdamn," he breathed, hand leaving your waist momentarily to adjust his seat, sliding himself back to make more space between him and the wheel. "Hop on, baby," he commanded, his voice rough with need as he pulled at you towards him. You climbed over the console, your dress hitching up as you straddled him, knees pressing into the worn leather seat on either side of his thighs.

His hands settled on your hips again, fingers digging in slightly as he looked up at you, his breath coming in shallow, ragged bursts. The raw hunger in his gaze sent a thrill through you, his need for you evident from the hardness pressed between your thighs. You leaned in, your lips finding his once more, the kiss deep and consuming as your tongues battled for dominance. 

The sensation of his hands roaming over your back, holding you tight to his firm chest, was exhilarating. His touch was both demanding and gentle, a mix of urgency and care that made your pulse race and nerves fray as he explored your body.

He kissed down your neck, his lips trailing hot and wet against your skin, leaving a path of shivers in their wake. His tongue flicked out, teasing the sensitive spots that drove you wild. When he reached the dome of your breasts, you hooked a finger around the fabric of your dress and the bra underneath, pulling them down to expose yourself to him. The sudden rush of cool air made your nipples harden instantly, standing erect in anticipation. Wade's eyes darkened with desire as he took in the sight before him, and a soft growl escaped his lips.

He took one nipple into his mouth, his tongue swirling around it with expert precision, each flick sending jolts of pleasure straight to your core. The delicious graze of his teeth added an edge to the sensation, making you gasp and arch your back, pressing yourself even closer to him.

His hands roamed over your back and sides, exploring every curve and contour, as if he couldn't get enough of you. The combination of his mouth on your breast and the possessive grip of his hands on your body was overwhelming your senses with a heady mix of pleasure and lust.

As he switched to your other nipple, giving it the same exquisite attention, you tangled your fingers in his hair, holding him close. The cabin of the truck seemed to shrink around you, the rain outside a distant, rhythmic backdrop to the heat building between you. The world outside ceased to exist, leaving just the two of you in this moment of raw, unfiltered passion.

Your hips began to move of their own accord, grinding against the roughness of his jeans, seeking more friction, more contact. Every nerve in your body felt alive, tuned to the frequency of his touch and the sensations he was eliciting from you. The tension that had been building all evening was finally coming to a head, and you hoped that this was only the beginning.

His hardness was unyielding against your thigh, the heat of it sending a thrill through to your core. You smiled, the excitement electrifying as you slid a hand between your bodies, fingers deftly working to unbuckle his belt. The metallic clink echoed in the confined space of the truck, adding to the charged atmosphere. You released him from the constraints of his jeans and underwear, feeling the weight of his cock in your hand, heavy and pulsing under your touch.

Wade's breath hitched, his teeth grazing down on your swollen nipple with just enough pressure to make you gasp. The flat of his tongue followed, soothing the bite with a heavenly lick that prickled your skin with goosebumps. He kissed up your jaw, his lips soft and warm as he grinned against your neck, mumbling a promise not to leave any visible marks on you this time. 

Before you had a chance to contemplate the significance of his words, you shifted, aligning yourself over him and using the leaking tip of his cock to slide your panties aside. The feel of his smooth head against your wet folds made you both moan softly. Wade's hips pushed upwards instinctively, seeking more of you, but you held back, teasing him by running his sensitive tip through your slickness.

His eyes were dark with lust, the intensity of his gaze almost too much to bear. "Please," he murmured against your skin, his voice raw with need. The sound of it made you ache for him and you felt your wetness seeping down your thigh as you dragged him back and forth.

You couldn't resist any longer. Slowly, you lowered yourself onto him, the head of his cock parting your folds and sliding into you with delicious resistance. He filled you completely, stretching you in a way that felt both familiar and new. Wade groaned, a deep, primal sound that resonated through his chest and into yours, his hands gripping your hips as if to anchor himself.

You started to move, setting a slow, deliberate pace that allowed you to feel every inch of him. Each thrust, each slide, sent waves of pleasure through your body. Wade's hands roamed over you, caressing and squeezing, his fingers digging into your flesh with every rise and fall as he guided you expertly on top of him, your own fingers gripping at the meat of his shoulders.

"W-Wade," you mewled, eyes rolling into the back of your head as he hit that sweet spot inside of you over and over.

The car was filled with the lurid sounds of your fucking —the soft moans, the wet squelches of your cunt taking him as began to bounce you on his cock, the occasional squeak of the leather seats. It was raw, it was real, and it was everything you'd secretly desired.

"You feel so good, baby," he murmured, pausing to tenderly nip at your chin. "So unbelievably good, wrapped around me like this." His words, laced with admiration, echoed in the intimate space between you.

Wade's lips found yours again, capturing them in a searing kiss that conveyed everything words couldn't. His tongue danced with yours, the kiss deepening as your pace quickened, the need to reach that ultimate crescendo becoming overwhelming. You rode him harder, faster, the friction building, the tension coiling tight within you.

When his hand slid down to where your bodies were joined, his finger pressed against the tight bundle of nerves that had you seeing stars. You tore your lips from his, seeking solace in the crook of his neck. Inhaling his bewitching scent—pine mingled with a faint hint of tobacco—your mind numbed, surrendering to the overwhelming sensations as you gave yourself to him completely.

Your body tensed, every muscle locking as waves of ecstasy washed over you, leaving you breathless and trembling under his touch. He muffled the cry of his name from your mouth with a fiery kiss, continued to use his grip on your waist to bounce you on top of him as he fucked you through your orgasm and chased his own. When he followed, he groaned into your mouth as he pumped his load inside of you, bit your bottom lip as your greedy pussy took all of him.

You broke the kiss and collapsed against his chest, feeling his strong arms envelop you as his chin rested gently on your head. He traced soothing patterns on your back, and for a moment, you stayed like that, intertwined, with the aftershocks of pleasure still rippling through you. Slowly, you ran a trail of soft kisses along his jaw before resting your forehead against his, both of you struggling to catch your breath. His large palm caressed the exposed skin of your ass, sliding back and forth between your behind and your thighs in a tender attempt to soothe and comfort you.

"Well," you breathed, your eyes gleaming with a teasing light, though a hint of vulnerability still shone through. "Did it feel wrong?"

He chuckled, leaning back against the seat as he considered you. "No, darlin', it did not," he said, his smile matching yours.

You rose on shaky legs, took him from you and tucked him back into his jeans before reluctantly moving away from him. The ache for more of him already tugged at you, but you knew your time together was limited tonight. As you shifted back to return to your seat, you misjudged the space and accidentally pressed against the horn of the truck. The sudden blare shattered the night's silence.

You jumped in surprise, and Wade's hands immediately grasped your hips, steadying you both. His gaze quickly scanned over your shoulder, looking for any sign that his daughters had been awakened by the noise. You mirrored his concern, your eyes darting to your parents' home. The windows had fogged with the tell-tale signs of your act, but you managed to peek through a clear spot to see. After a few tense moments, you sighed in relief when everything remained still.

Looking at each other in disbelief, you both laughed as you sat back in your seat, adjusted your dress to cover your breasts and thighs as you smoothed the down the fabric. A wave of nerves washed over you, unsure of your next move until Wade turned to you with an endearing smile. "I'm gonna walk you to your door now, before you wake the whole neighbourhood."

He left the comforting warmth of the truck, and for a brief moment, you felt adrift, alone and lost. But then your door opened, and there he stood, extending a hand toward you. You smiled, placing your hand in his as he gently helped you down from the truck.

As he walked ahead, he kept your hand clasped behind him, positioning it between you both as if to shield you from any prying eyes that might intrude on your moment. The gesture touched you deeply, a silent reassurance that he was still connected to you even after leaving the intimate cocoon of the truck.

You followed him up the steps to your porch, the familiar creak of the wooden boards beneath your feet grounding you in the present. When you reached the door, he reluctantly let go of your hand, allowing you to rummage through your purse for your keys. The rain had stopped and the night air was cool against your skin, filled with the subtle fragrance of blooming flowers and the distant hum of nocturnal creatures.

"Are you okay?" he asked, his gaze brimming with worry as he peered down at you. "You'd tell me if you weren't, wouldn't you?"

Your lips curved into a smile, moved by his genuine concern for your well-being. You held you keys in your hand, the metallic clank loud in the silence of the night. "I'm perfectly fine," you reassured him, warmth infusing your words. "Actually, more than fine. Thank you for turning a disastrous evening around, Mr. Felton," you quipped, a smirk tugging at your lips.

Grinning, he casually leaned against the porch banister, hands snugly tucked into the pockets of his jeans. A mischievous glint in his eyes, he winked, reigniting a spark of need within you. "Hope to catch you at the next cookout," he teased, before pushing off the banister and descending the stairs with easy confidence.

You nibbled on your bottom lip, silently watching as he made his way to his own porch. Pausing at his door, he cast a lingering glance your way, offering a final wave before disappearing inside.

Entering your home, you kicked off your shoes and dropped your purse, leaning back against the door with a contented sigh. Your heart overflowed with joy, and your mind stubbornly refused to dwell on anything but the exciting possibilities awaiting you with Wade. You weren't quite sure what this was between you yet, but one thing emerged crystal clear: your dad was to never find out. 

[tarotwithavi]

What kind of lovers do you attract/ are attracting?

How to choose a pile?

Take a deep breath and gently close your eyes. Politely request your spirit guides to reveal the appropriate pile meant for you, then open your eyes. Whichever pile captures your attention is the one meant for you.

Masterlist

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Pile 1

Your energy has this amazing superpower to heal, like a magic balm for broken hearts. It's no wonder people are drawn to you like bees to honey. You're like a walking oasis of comfort for those who've had their share of love's bumps and bruises. Those you attract are the creative types, the ones who think outside the box and color outside the lines. You've got this magnetic pull for guitar-strumming, canvas-painting, poem-writing folks. You know, those artsy souls who've often danced with heartache. It's like your aura says, "Hey, bring on the creatives!" Your magnetism doesn't stop at artists. Nope, it goes all the way to the bank, you attract some deep-pocketed darlings. Money? Not an issue for them, they've got it going on. And oh boy, strength? Both mental and physical? It's like you've got this fiery aura that's a total strength magnet. And hold onto your hats because popularity is part of your package deal. You snag the ones who are well-liked, the ones everyone wants to hang around. It's like you've got this neon "cool people only" sign that shines super bright. The people you draw in might be total opposites of you. I know, wild, right? But hey, life's all about surprises.

Pile 2

So, this is my personal pile of hopeless romantics. Get ready, because the lovers you're pulling in? They're just like you. You're like a magnet for those total dreamers, the ones who see love as this magical, larger-than-life adventure. You know those who could fall in love with the idea of falling in love. Yep, that's who's knocking on your heart's door. You're also attracting a bunch of daydreamers , those people who view love through these super rosy glasses. It's like they're lost in this fairytale, and they're looking for their partner to be the co-star in their romantic movie of life. And guess what? Your energy is like a beacon for the brainiacs too. You're snagging those who are smart, logical, and always ready with a dose of sensible advice. They're a blend of both worlds. It's like they've got this epic tug-of-war between their dreamy side and their practical side, and you're right in the middle of that sweet balance. They might not be super experienced in the love department. It's like they're all about that puppy love, that innocent and genuine kind of affection. So, whether you're nodding your head like, "Yeah, that's me," or you're like, "Wait, what?" this is your magnetic vibe.

Pile 3

You've got this power to pull in super dedicated lovers. They're the ones who are all about their hustle, totally work-oriented, and maybe even more focused on their projects than on matters of the heart. But hold on tight, because you've also got a thing for those who date with marriage in mind. No casual hookups for you , it's all about those who are in it for the long haul. Now, let's talk about down-to-earth vibes. The ones you attract, They're as grounded as a sturdy oak tree. It's like they've got their feet planted firmly on the ground, which makes for a really solid connection. And speaking of connections, you're kind of a magnet for the old-school romantics. Yep, you're attracting those who've got a dash of old-fashioned love in their style. It's like they're straight out of a vintage love story. The lovers you're drawing in are all about stability and commitment. Heartbreak? Not on their agenda. These are the ones who are ready for the real deal, a relationship with a rock-solid foundation. So, if you've been worried about love's rollercoaster, fret not. Your vibe is all about that steady, unshakeable connection.

[muiitoloko]

Needs

Summary: You are there to meet all of his needs.

Pairing: Karl Hoffmeister × Fem! Reader

Warnings: Smut.

Author's Notes: Well, folks, brace yourselves for another rollercoaster ride of a story! I gotta admit, this one had me wrestling with writer's block like nobody's business. Every word felt like it was mocking me from the page! But then, lo and behold, I stumbled upon some Karl gifs on Tumblr and bam! Inspiration struck like lightning! 🌩️ Had to spill some ink on Karl, no question about it. Here's hoping I did justice to the enigma that is Karl in this one-shot! Oh, and can we talk about Charlotte? Let's just say, I'm not exactly her biggest fan... Am I alone in this? 🤔

Also read on Ao3

As Karl stood by the window, his gaze fixed on you, the maid, playing with Otto in the garden, a myriad of conflicting emotions swirled within him. It had been two weeks since Charlotte had left with Friedrich, leaving Karl and Otto behind. Two weeks since Karl had managed to recover from his illness, but the ache of missing his wife lingered like a ghost haunting the halls of his home.

As he watched you, a simple maid with a beauty that had gone unnoticed until now, Karl couldn't help but feel a pang of longing deep within his chest. He missed the warmth of a woman, especially when he lay alone in his bed at night, the cold sheets a constant reminder of his loneliness.

Over time, Karl began to notice things about you that he hadn't paid attention to before. He saw your beauty, simple yet captivating, like someone from his own class. He observed the dedication with which you carried out your duties, the tender care you showed towards Otto, his beloved son.

And then, as if by some cruel twist of fate, Karl's gaze fell upon the neckline of your dress, the delicate curve of your breasts teasingly visible beneath the fabric. His breath caught in his throat at the sight, his pulse quickening with desire as he imagined what it would be like to hold them, to suckle at them with a hunger that bordered on desperation.

Karl closed his eyes, cursing himself as he leaned his forehead against the cool glass of the window. He missed the warmth of a woman, the softness of her skin against his, and there you were, a woman so close and yet so far away.

He wondered if you were still a virgin, if you had ever felt the heat of a man's touch. But it didn't matter, did it? Because Karl would be better than any man you had ever known, much better. He would treat you with the respect and adoration you deserved, fulfilling every desire and whim with a passion that knew no bounds.

But then, with a shake of his head, Karl opened his eyes, the realization of what he was thinking hitting him like a ton of bricks. What the hell was he doing? He was a married man, a father, and you were just a maid, beneath him in every sense of the word.

With a sense of self-disgust, Karl moved away from the window and strode purposefully towards the door, determined to put an end to these foolish thoughts once and for all. He swung the door open, interrupting your play with Otto as he ushered you both inside.

"Enough playing for now, Otto," Karl said, his voice firm as he directed his son towards the bathroom. "It's time to wash up and get ready for dinner."

Otto visibly wilted at the dismissal, his shoulders slumping as he reluctantly obeyed his father's command. You, on the other hand, bowed respectfully, apologizing for the interruption and offering to help with dinner preparations.

But Karl ignored your offer, his gaze distant as he instructed Otto to hurry along. "We will have dinner promptly at seven," he said, his tone clipped. "Make sure everything is ready by then."

You nodded obediently, bowing once again before turning to leave the room. As you passed Karl, he couldn't help but notice the way your dress clung to your curves, the sway of your hips as you walked away sending a shiver of desire down his spine.

But Karl quickly pushed aside his wayward thoughts, his sense of propriety kicking in as he returned to his office at home. Taking a tissue from his pocket, he pressed it against his mouth while coughing, the sound muffled against the fabric as he tried to quell the persistent ache in his chest.

"Damn foolish thoughts," Karl muttered to himself, his voice tinged with self-loathing as he leaned back in his chair, his mind racing with thoughts of you. "I must focus on my work, on providing for my family. That is all that matters."

But even as he tried to push you out of his mind, Karl couldn't shake the feeling of longing that lingered like a shadow in the depths of his soul. And as he sat there, alone in his office, the sound of your laughter echoing in his ears, he couldn't help but wonder what might have been if things had been different.

As Karl sank into the warm water of the bathtub, he closed his eyes, trying to push aside the intrusive thoughts that plagued his mind. The sound of the water lapping gently against the sides of the tub provided a soothing backdrop, but even the comforting embrace of the warm water couldn't chase away the persistent ache of longing that gnawed at his chest.

You, the maid, moved quietly around the bathroom, preparing to assist Karl with his bath as you had done countless times before. But today was different. Today, Karl couldn't help but notice the way your gentle hands moved with practiced ease, the way your touch sent shivers of desire coursing through his veins.

As you approached the tub, Karl tried to suppress the rising tide of arousal that threatened to consume him. He had never given your presence a second thought before, but now, he couldn't even relax in your presence without feeling the stirrings of desire.

Desperate for some relief from his torment, Karl toyed with the idea of visiting some prostitutes, hoping that the physical release would help to banish the thoughts of you from his mind. But even as the thought crossed his mind, he couldn't bring himself to act on it, the image of your face haunting him like a specter in the darkness.

You began to wash Karl's back, your touch gentle and soothing against his skin. But as your hands moved lower, tracing the curve of his spine with feather-light touches, Karl couldn't help but tense up, the warmth of your touch sending shockwaves of desire coursing through his veins.

He tried to ignore the sensation, to focus on anything other than the way your touch made him feel. But when you passed into his arms, your body pressed tantalizingly close to his, Karl couldn't help but look at you, his gaze lingering on your face for a moment too long before he quickly averted his eyes, his cheeks flushing with embarrassment.

You noticed his gaze and gave him a small smile, your eyes filled with warmth and understanding. "Are you feeling better, Herr Hoffmeister?" you asked respectfully, your voice soft and gentle as you continued to bathe him.

Karl nodded, his voice hoarse with emotion as he admitted, "Yes, I am feeling much better, thank you. Still coughing a lot, but not as bad as before."

You smiled again, genuine happiness shining in your eyes as you said, "I'm glad to hear that, Herr Hoffmeister. You had us all worried there for a while."

The two of you fell silent once again, the only sound in the room the gentle splashing of water as you continued to bathe Karl. And as he lay there, enveloped in the warmth of the water and the comfort of your presence, Karl couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to reach out and take you in his arms, to hold you close and never let go. But he quickly pushed aside those thoughts, burying them deep within his heart as he focused on the task at hand, determined to put an end to these foolish fantasies once and for all.

As the silence stretched between you and Karl, he finally broke it with a question, his voice cutting through the quietude of the bathroom. "How long have you been serving me, uh... what was your name again?" he asked, his tone slightly hesitant as he tried to recall your name.

You smiled softly, accustomed to his occasional forgetfulness. "It's [Your Name], Herr Hoffmeister," you replied respectfully, your voice gentle as you continued to bathe him. "And I've been serving you for ten years now, since I was eighteen."

Karl's eyebrows shot up in surprise at your response. "Ten years?" he repeated, genuine curiosity shining in his gray eyes. "That's quite a long time. I must admit, I hadn't realized it had been so long."

You nodded, a small smile playing at the corners of your lips as you continued to wash his back. "Yes, time flies, doesn't it?" you remarked, your voice tinged with a hint of wistfulness. "It feels like just yesterday that I first started working here."

Karl fell silent for a moment, lost in thought as he processed your words. Then, with a curious glint in his eyes, he asked, "Do you have a husband? Or perhaps a fiancé? Children, maybe?"

You shook your head, a faint blush coloring your cheeks at the mention of marriage and children. "No, Herr Hoffmeister," you replied quietly, your voice barely above a whisper. "I've never had many expectations about marriage or children. My life has always been here, serving you and taking care of Otto."

Karl's curiosity seemed to be piqued by your response, his gaze lingering on your face as he asked, "Do you have any family, then? Siblings, perhaps? Do your parents live nearby?"

You smiled, though there was a hint of sadness in your eyes as you spoke. "I don't know, Herr Hoffmeister," you admitted, your voice tinged with regret. "I was orphaned at a young age, raised by the nuns at the orphanage."

Karl's eyes widened in surprise at your revelation, his expression one of genuine sympathy as he processed the information. "You're an orphan?" he asked softly, his voice filled with compassion. "Do you... do you know who your parents are?"

You nod solemnly in response to Karl's question, the memories of your past flooding back with painful clarity. "Yes, Herr Hoffmeister," you reply quietly, your voice tinged with sadness. "My mother was a prostitute, and my father... well, from what the nuns told me, he was a judge from England named Turpin."

Karl's eyebrows shoot up in surprise at your revelation, his expression one of genuine curiosity as he processes the information. "Turpin?" he repeats, his voice tinged with disbelief. "The judge from England? How did...?"

You nod, cutting him off before he can finish his question. "Yes, Herr Hoffmeister," you confirm, your voice barely above a whisper. "He was traveling through Germany and ended up getting my mother pregnant. But he made it clear to her that he didn't want me, and he returned to England, leaving my mother alone to raise me."

A pang of sadness comes over you as you imagine the struggles your mother faced, the possible loneliness and hardships she must have endured. Only she could not escape the cruel hand that fate imposed on her and ended up dying in childbirth, leaving you alone and an orphan.

Karl's expression softens with sympathy as he listens to your story, his gray eyes filled with compassion. "I'm so sorry, [Your Name]," he murmurs, his voice gentle but filled with genuine regret. "That must have been incredibly difficult for you."

You offer him a small smile, though there is a hint of sadness in your eyes as you continue to speak. "It was," you admit quietly. "But I was fortunate enough to be taken in by the nuns at the orphanage, where I was raised until I turned eighteen."

His curiosity got the best of him, and he asked, "Have you ever tried to contact your father?"

You nodded quietly, a hint of sadness flickering across your features as you recalled the memories of your youth. "Yes, Herr Hoffmeister," you replied softly. "When I was young, I sent a letter to him, hoping to establish some connection. But I heard nothing back. Later, I learned that he had married a peasant girl and started a family of his own."

Karl's expression darkened at the mention of your father's lack of response, a flicker of anger flashing in his gray eyes. "I'm sorry to hear that," he said quietly, his voice tinged with regret. "It must have been difficult for you, reaching out only to be met with silence."

You nodded, a wistful smile playing at the corners of your lips. "It was, Herr Hoffmeister," you admitted, your voice barely above a whisper. "But I let it go. I lived in the orphanage until I turned eighteen, and then I came here, looking for a job. The old butler spoke to you on my behalf, and you graciously allowed me to become one of the housemaids."

Karl listened intently to your words, his gaze drifting away for a moment as he processed the information. But when he turned back to you, there was a hint of uncertainty in his eyes as he asked, "And you've been serving me ever since?"

You nodded, a sense of pride evident in your voice as you replied, "Yes, Herr Hoffmeister. It has been an honor to serve you and to take care of all your needs."

Karl looked away, his mind swirling with conflicting emotions as he questioned whether your loyalty was truly genuine. "But would you be willing to take care of me, of all my needs?" he asked hesitantly, his baritone voice betraying a hint of vulnerability.

You frowned slightly at his question, unsure of what he was getting at. "Yes, of course, Herr Hoffmeister," you replied earnestly, your voice filled with determination. "I am here to serve you in any way that I can."

Karl's gaze softened at your response, and he reached out to take your hand in his, pressing it gently against his chest as he searched your eyes for reassurance. "All my needs?" he pressed, his voice barely above a whisper.

You blushed at the implication of his words, understanding what he was asking. Unable to meet his gaze, you looked away briefly before meeting his eyes once again, your cheeks tinged with a faint blush. "Yes, all your needs," you affirmed, your voice steady despite the embarrassment that coursed through your veins.

Karl's expression softens further, his gray eyes filled with a mixture of longing and vulnerability as he pulls you closer by the wrist he's holding. His touch is surprisingly gentle as he brings his other hand to cup your face, his thumb brushing lightly against your cheek.

His voice falls into a low, husky cadence as he asks you to answer to his need now. "Do you mean that, [Your Name]?" Karl's voice is barely above a whisper, filled with a desperate hopefulness.

You meet his gaze, your heart racing with a mixture of fear and excitement. His vulnerability surprises you, but there's something in his eyes that draws you closer, despite the implications of his request. "Yes, Herr Hoffmeister," you reply softly, your voice trembling slightly. "I am here to serve you."

Karl's grip tightens slightly on your chin, his gaze intense as he leans closer, his lips hovering just inches from yours. "Then kiss me," he murmurs, his voice a mere whisper against your lips.

You hesitate for a moment, your heart pounding in your chest as you meet his gaze. But then, with a newfound resolve, you lean forward, closing the distance between you as you press your lips against his.

At first, the kiss is tentative, hesitant, as if both of you are unsure of what to expect. But then, as the seconds pass, the kiss deepens, becoming more urgent, more passionate. Karl's hand moves from your chin to the back of your neck, pulling you closer as he deepens the kiss even further.

The warmth of his lips against yours sends a shiver of desire coursing through your veins, igniting a fire deep within your soul. You respond eagerly, your hands moving to tangle in his gray hair as you lose yourself in the intensity of the moment.

For a brief, fleeting moment, nothing else exists except the two of you, lost in each other's embrace. And as you pull away, breathless and flushed with desire, you realize that nothing will ever be the same again.

Karl's gray eyes are dark with longing as he admits in a husky voice, "I want to take you to my bed today, [Your Name]."

Your heart races at his words, your cheeks flushing with excitement as you nod eagerly, your desire mirroring his own. Karl's touch is surprisingly gentle as he caresses your face, his thumb brushing lightly against your cheek as he studies your expression.

In a moment of vulnerability, Karl's gaze drifts to your lips before he gathers his courage to ask, "Are you... a virgin, [Your Name]?" His voice is soft, tinged with a hint of uncertainty as he waits for your response.

You blush at the question, feeling a mixture of embarrassment and excitement as you shake your head. "No, Herr Hoffmeister," you admit quietly, your voice barely above a whisper. "I... I'm sorry."

But Karl's response surprises you. Instead of expressing disappointment or disapproval, he simply smiles and says, "It's alright, [Your Name]. I don't mind." His words are filled with understanding and acceptance, easing the tension that had been building inside you.

Then, with a note of anticipation in his voice, Karl questions, "Do you... want this? Want to go to bed with me, [Your Name]?" His eyes search yours, longing to hear your answer, to know that you desire him as much as he desires you.

You meet his gaze with unwavering determination, the fire of desire burning brightly in your eyes as you confess, "Yes, Herr Hoffmeister. For a long time, I've thought about it, imagined what it would be like to be taken care of by you, just as you took care of Mrs. Hoffmeister."

Karl's heart swells with a mixture of desire and affection at your words, his hands trembling slightly as he lets go of your face and rises from the bathtub. Moving away from you, he looks momentarily irritated as he says, "Don't mention her, Fräulein. I don't want to think about the fact that she left me for another man."

You nod apologetically, understanding the pain that Karl must be feeling at the mention of his estranged wife. As Karl dries himself off with a towel, he orders you to follow him, and you do so obediently as he leaves the bathroom and heads towards the bedroom.

The anticipation hangs thick in the air as you enter the bedroom together, the tension between you palpable as you both prepare to take the next step in your relationship. His gaze lingers on your simple maid's dress, the fabric clinging to your curves in all the right places, accentuating your beauty in a way that sends a shiver of desire down his spine. He can feel his pulse quicken with each passing moment, his arousal evident as he takes in the sight of you standing before him.

With a husky voice, Karl murmurs, "Fräulein, come closer." His words are a command, filled with a raw intensity that leaves no room for hesitation. You obey without question, stepping closer to him until you're standing just inches apart, the heat of his body radiating against your skin.

Karl's hands move to your waist, pulling you flush against him as he leans down to capture your lips in a searing kiss. His lips are demanding, hungry, as he claims you with a passion that leaves you breathless and wanting more.

And as Karl's lips claim yours in a passionate kiss, you feel the unmistakable prickle of his mustache against your skin, sending a thrill of excitement coursing through your veins. You relish the sensation, savoring the feeling of his rough facial hair against your soft lips, a tantalizing reminder of his masculinity.

But as the kiss deepens, you break away, holding his shoulders firmly as you gaze into his gray eyes with unwavering determination. His naked form stands before you, still slightly damp from the bath you had given him earlier, his baritone voice filled with desire as he watches you intently.

With deliberate movements, you caress his shoulders, feeling the tension melt away beneath your touch. Your hands glide down to his chest, tracing the contours of his muscular frame before slowly falling to your knees in front of him, maintaining eye contact as you do so.

Karl's breath catches in his throat as he watches you, anticipation evident in his gaze as he waits for you to take the next step. His half-hard cock twitches with desire, but you deliberately ignore it for now, focusing instead on pleasing him in other ways.

As you settle at his feet, your hands trail up his thighs, the fabric of your simple maid's dress brushing against his skin. You can feel the heat radiating from his body, his arousal evident as you continue to tease him with your touch.

With a coy smile, you look up at him, your eyes shining with mischief as you ask in a husky voice, "Herr Hoffmeister, may I take care of your needs?" Your words are filled with promise, a hint of anticipation laced with desire as you await his response.

Karl's breath hitches at your question, his gray eyes dark with desire as he nods eagerly, his voice thick with arousal. "Yes, Fräulein," he murmurs, his voice husky with need. "Please, take care of me."

With a wicked grin, you lean forward, your lips brushing against the sensitive skin of his inner thigh as you trail kisses along his flesh. You can feel his pulse quicken beneath your touch, his breath coming in shallow gasps as you tease him mercilessly.

But you're not done yet. With a slow, deliberate motion, you run your hands up his thighs, bypassing his aching cock as you reach for his hips. Karl's groan of frustration only spurs you on, your lips curling into a wicked smile as you revel in the power you hold over him.

With practiced ease, you massage his hips, your fingers digging into his flesh as you work to relieve the tension that has built up within him. Karl's grip tightens on your shoulders, his baritone voice filled with desperation as he pleads with you to give him what he craves.

The hunger in Karl's gray eyes grows more intense, his baritone voice thick with desire as he watches you with unabashed longing. The sight of you, dressed in your simple maid's attire, on your knees before him ignites a fire within him, driving him to the brink of madness with need.

But even in this vulnerable position, it's clear to karl that you hold all the power. Your wicked grin, your teasing touch, they all serve to remind him that it's you who dictates the pace, you who decides how far this will go.

And yet, Karl can't help but feel a surge of excitement at the prospect of surrendering control to you. With a low growl of desire, he reaches down to grasp your chin, his thumb brushing lightly against your lips as he murmurs in a husky voice, "You have me completely at your mercy, Fräulein. But I warn you, I'm not easily tamed."

Your eyes sparkle with mischief as you meet his gaze, your lips curling into a wicked smile as you reply, "Oh, I'm well aware of that, Herr Hoffmeister. But don't worry, I like a challenge."

With that, you lean forward, your lips trailing a path of fire along his inner thigh as you inch closer and closer to your ultimate goal. Karl's pulse quickens with each teasing touch, his heart racing with anticipation as he feels your lips inch closer to his aching cock.

And then, finally, your lips closed around him, your mouth hot and wet as you took him deep within your throat. Karl's head fell back in ecstasy, his gray eyes fluttering shut as he surrendered himself to the pleasure of your touch.

With each expert flick of your tongue, each gentle suckle of your lips, Karl felt himself spiraling further and further into a blissful haze of desire. Your mouth was pure heaven, a sinful delight that threatened to consume him whole as you worked your magic on him.

But Karl wasn't content to simply be a passive participant in this dance of pleasure. With a low growl of desire, he reached down to grasp your hair, guiding you with gentle but firm pressure as he set the rhythm of your movements.

The feeling of your lips wrapped around him, your tongue swirling and dancing with wicked intent, was enough to drive Karl to the edge of sanity. His breath came in ragged gasps, his chest heaving with the effort to contain the overwhelming tide of pleasure that threatened to consume him.

As he felt himself nearing the brink of ecstasy, he abruptly pulled away, leaving you gasping for more as he instructed you to disrobe and recline upon the bed. Eager to feel him within you, you wasted no time in complying with his command, swiftly removing your garments and lying back upon the bed, your body pulsating with anticipation.

Karl watched intently as you shed each piece of clothing, his gray eyes dark with desire as he took in the sight of your naked form. He admired the way your curves beckoned to him, the softness of your skin inviting him to explore every inch of your body.

Once you were fully undressed and lying on the bed, Karl moved closer, his hands trembling with need as he reached down to caress his own throbbing cock. His baritone voice was thick with desire as he spoke, his words sending a shiver of excitement down your spine.

"Now, meine liebe, I want to feel you around me," Karl murmured, his voice husky with lust as he positioned himself between your legs. "But first, I need to prepare you for me."

With a wicked grin, Karl leaned down to press a gentle kiss to your lips before trailing kisses down your neck and chest, his lips leaving a trail of fire in their wake. As he reached your breasts, he took each nipple into his mouth in turn, sucking and nibbling on them with fervent desire.

Your breath hitched at the sensation, your fingers tangling in his gray hair as you arched your back in pleasure. Karl's mustache tickled your skin, adding to the intensity of the sensation as he lavished attention on your sensitive peaks.

But Karl wasn't content to stop there. With a devilish gleam in his eyes, he continued his journey southward, trailing kisses along your stomach and thighs until he reached the apex of your desire. His tongue flicked out to taste your wetness, and you moaned in ecstasy as he teased you with his expert ministrations.

"Oh, Herr Hoffmeister," you gasped, your voice thick with desire as he worshipped you with his mouth. "Please, I need you inside me."

Karl removes his mouth from your pussy, and a soft whimper escapes your lips, craving more of his touch. He doesn't disappoint, his thick fingers soon replacing his tongue as he stretches you open, preparing you for what's to come. With practiced ease, he slides two fingers inside you, his touch sending shockwaves of pleasure coursing through your body.

"Karl," you moan softly, obeying his command to call him by his first name. The sound of his name on your lips is like music to his ears, fueling his desire even further. But he reminds you to keep your voice down, not wanting to wake his son with your passionate cries.

You nod eagerly, squirming on the bed as Karl's fingers explore every inch of you, driving you wild with need. His baritone voice washes over you like a wave of heat as he murmurs, "That's it, meine liebe. Moan my name for me, but remember, quietly."

With each thrust of his fingers, you can't help but moan, the pleasure building to an unbearable intensity. "Karl," you whimper, your voice barely above a whisper as you ride his fingers, craving more of him with each passing moment.

Karl's gray hair brushes against your skin as he leans down to capture your lips in a searing kiss, his mustache tickling your skin as his tongue dances with yours. The sensation sends a jolt of desire straight to your core, driving you closer to the edge of ecstasy with each passing second.

As the heat between you reaches its peak, Karl finally withdraws his fingers, his gaze filled with hunger as he positions himself between your legs. With a wicked grin, he whispers, "Are you ready for me, meine liebe? Ready to take all of me?"

You nod eagerly, your body trembling with anticipation as Karl enters you with a single, powerful thrust. The feeling of him filling you completely is overwhelming, sending waves of pleasure crashing over you in a dizzying whirlwind.

"Karl," you cry out, unable to contain your passion as he moves inside you, each thrust driving you closer and closer to the brink of ecstasy. But you remember his warning and keep your voice low, your moans muffled against his shoulder as you surrender yourself to the pleasure of his touch.

With each thrust, Karl's baritone voice fills the room, urging you on with whispered words of encouragement. "That's it, meine liebe," he murmurs, his voice thick with desire. "Take all of me. Feel me deep inside you."

You cling to him desperately, your nails digging into his back as you ride the wave of pleasure together. And as you reach the pinnacle of ecstasy, you cry out his name one last time, your voice filled with pure bliss as you finally succumb to the overwhelming pleasure that consumes you both.

As Karl continues thrusting, chasing his own climax, you writhe beneath him, your body aching with pleasure as you cling to him desperately. His baritone voice fills the room with a chorus of moans and groans, the sound of his pleasure mingling with your own as you reach the pinnacle of ecstasy together.

With a hoarse moan, Karl finally pulls out, his seed spilling onto your belly in a hot, sticky mess. For a moment, he stays on top of you, his body trapping you against the mattress as he revels in the aftermath of your passionate encounter. Then, with a contented sigh, he rolls off of you and lies next to you with a satisfied smile on his lips.

You lie side by side, panting and spent, your bodies still thrumming with the aftershocks of pleasure. But despite the exhaustion that threatens to consume you, you can't help but feel a sense of contentment wash over you as you bask in the warmth of Karl's embrace.

Feeling a surge of affection, you crawl towards him, pressing your naked body against his as you lay your head on his chest. Karl's arms wrap around you instinctively, pulling you close as he presses a tender kiss to your head.

With a contented sigh, you ask in a soft voice, "Did I manage to meet your needs, Karl?"

Karl's gray eyes sparkle with affection as he gazes down at you, a fond smile playing at the corners of his lips. "Yes, meine liebe," he murmurs, his voice filled with warmth. "You exceeded my every expectation."

Feeling emboldened by his words, you trail a hand down his chest, teasing him with feather-light touches as you whisper in his ear, "Is there anything else you desire, Karl? Anything at all?"

Karl's breath hitches at your touch, his pulse quickening with desire as he meets your gaze with unwavering intensity. "Oh, Fräulein," he murmurs, his voice thick with longing. "I desire nothing more than to lose myself in you, body and soul."

With that, he captures your lips in a searing kiss, his hunger evident as he claims you with a passion that leaves you breathless and wanting more. And as you surrender yourself to the pleasure of his touch once again, you realize that this is only the beginning of your journey together.

Translation:

"meine liebe" - my love

"Herr Hoffmeister" - Mr. Hoffmeister

"Fräulein" - Miss (or young woman, typically used to address an unmarried woman)

[mosticonicbirdcallbracket]

MOST ICONIC BIRD CALL BRACKET: SEMIFINALS: MOURNING DOVE vs. KOOKABURRA

IN THE BLUE CORNER, get ready for a spectacle of tranquility and grace! we have a guest that will captivate your hearts with its serene presence. please welcome the MOURNING DOVE!

with feathers as soft as a gentle breeze and a demeanor that exudes calmness, this avian beauty is a true marvel of nature. known for its soothing coos and tranquil aura, the mourning dove represents peace and harmony. but don't underestimate the mourning dove's quiet nature, for it possesses an inner strength that cannot be denied.

so, prepare yourselves as we witness the graceful beauty and unwavering spirit of the mourning dove. get ready to be enchanted by the mourning dove's serene performance, as it spreads its wings and brings a sense of peace to the ring!

IN THE RED CORNER, we have a guest that will make you laugh, cheer, and soar with excitement. making its way to the ring, hailing from the land down under, please welcome the charismatic master of mirth, the KOOKABURRA!

known for its contagious laughter and infectious energy, the kookaburra is the embodiment of joy and frivolity. the kookaburra's call is synonymous with any jungle scene in the movies, regardless of whether it takes place in australia or not. that's how you know it has a real star quality, folks!

get ready for a rollercoaster of entertainment as the kookaburra takes center stage, bringing joy and hilarity to the ring like no other!

[wannabanauthor]

For those of us who started watching 9-1-1 again or for the first time because of the BuckTommy kiss, you are valid for wanting to watch the show only for that. It might help to look up summaries of what happened on the wiki to get a better feels for the characters to help in your shipping experience, but it’s also okay if you only watch BuckTommy scenes.

You’re allowed to enjoy fictional media in whatever way you want that’s not illegal. There are no gold medals given out for how you watch it. At all. You’re allowed to like what you like and discard the rest for whatever reason.

Me personally, I cannot emotionally handle all the drama in the show. I watched S1 and most of S2, and it was so heavy that I looked up to see if a pairing would happen and saw that it didn’t, so I quit the show because it was not worth emotional rollercoaster it put me on.

I work in mental health in my real life, and I have seen so many horrifying things in charts that I do not need to seek out emotionally traumatizing fiction outside my designated PMS days where I let my emotions run free.

Seriously though. I’ve been struggling with feeling like not a real fan of the show, but then I realized that it doesn’t matter. I’m not here to impress online strangers who definitely don’t sign my paychecks or pay my bills. I do that on my own, so I don’t give a fuck how people perceive me as a fan.

I’m 32 years old, and I have experienced a lot of loss in my life over the past 11 years. So many deaths of loved ones and funerals. Let’s not even discuss the performance punishment at my previous job that stressed me out so much that I was ready to leave this earth twice, and my parents had to intervene to talk me down. My mom, my former work mom, and stepmom all got cancer a few years ago, like one after the other, and survived. Do you really think that I need to watch the entire show and know all the details to be a proper fan? Especially with how heavy 9-1-1 can be?

So for my fellow fans and shippers of BuckTommy, enjoy the show however you want. There’s no right or wrong way to watch a show. Engaging in fandom however, is a different thing all together. But it’s perfectly fine to ship what you ship and ignore everything else. I’ve done it with several shows. Hell, some shows got my attention because of ships, and I stayed after the show went downhill because of the ships, but then eventually stopped watching. Or most of the time I quit when I see my ship sinking because I’ve been there when my ships had one character killed in a triggering way that relates to their marginalized status, and that has led me to have real life emotional breakdowns.

So take care of your mental health, and watch shows for whatever reason you want. People might judge you or look down on you, but that’s their fucking problem. Not yours. Why are they so obsessed with you anyway?

Have a wonderful weekend, folks, and remember the block button is there for a reason.

[kiyoitiepie]

My Favorite BL Dramas of 2023

happy new year to everyone who uses the gregorian calendar. we had so much good content come out this year. i'm gonna list my favs. please remember these are my personal faves and may be objectively terrible. do not be alarmed.

My Beautiful Man S2 and Movie

If you ask me this series is one of the best bls of all time. idc idc. im a hira and kiyoi girlie through and through. how many bl's do you know with 2 seasons and an original movie. not those repackaged ones that they try to hand feed us. an actual movie with a plot???? the bar is on the floor clearly. but hira and kiyoi are gonna surpass that bar every. single. time.

Love Tractor

I didn't hear enough people screaming about Love Tractor. crickets tbh. Which is blasphemous in my opinion. How could you be quiet when this lovely bumbling himbo with the dopiest grin is on your screen? look at him!!

Eighth Sense

10's across the board. No question. No notes.

this scene^ BROKE me

Our Dining Table

Ok hear me out. I didn't think this was the best bl in the world BUT it was so wholesome that it deserves a spot. top tier comfort show. It got me through many bad days. Admittedly, there were a few times I purposely put it on bc i knew it would put me to sleep. please don't jump me.

Unintentional Love Story

Now...I'm not a huge kbl person. However, this was really nice. Had a solid plot. I don't remember much abt it but I know there was pottery and I had a good time

Only Friends

This was culture. This was a movement. I will never forgive them for how they treated Boston. Even still, I was there every week ready for the chaos. I had the time of my life.

Bed Friend

It's hard to believe this came out this year. Like ??? But really that shows how much I've established this show as a classic in my mind. BED FRIEND? UEA? baddest bitch in the land?? KING? greenest flag out there???? (debatable but for the sake of my argument lets pretend). It had every element. good plot, great visuals, a little heat. like come on who else is doing it like them?

i just know if me and uea were ever in the same room he would judge me so much

Dangerous Romance

I've seen mixed reviews on this one but I had a fun time. Kanghan is a prissy little spoiled brat, but he's my prissy little spoiled brat. I loved their story progression. Which is saying a lot for me bc I don't like enemies to lovers. like why are we fighting? also "i'm an introvert" is the funniest shit i've heard all year.

La Pluie

this was so shockingly good i wish it got more attention. iqiyi in general really did their big one this year. when it rains you can only hear your soulmate? love!

Laws of Attraction

this was a rollercoaster. i started watching ironically because i thought it would be terrible when i saw the mc go super saiyan. that shit is still hilarious idc.

Love Syndrome III

Now before we start throwing tomatoes...let's hear me out. Nothing has caught my attention this year the way this series did. This was another series I was watching ironically until suddenly i wasn't. It's also just so funny that they released the third one without dropping a first or second. but bad bitches don't need to explain themselves. and YES love syndrome is a bad bitch. let's stop acting like we watch bl's solely for the quality. i don't need marvel cgi to have a good time. sometimes a dollar store wig and the most toxic couple you've ever seen is enough to make some shit shake. if this was released during the tharntype era??? oh bitches would've ate it up. HAPPILY. rant over.

Last Twilight

it's good man. what more can i say? i hope it doesn't disappoint me in the end.

Pit Babe

i'm very pleased. very much so. i know alot of folks went into this show expecting a little teehee. to laugh at the omegaverse racecar show. NOT ME. i've waited for this moment. and anyone who's seen me screaming in the tag can attest. this is a game changer. not just for bl but the fandom community at large. and don't even get me started on their chemistry. babe's smile whenever he's around charlie?? mama and papa?? MAMA AND FUCKING PAPA?? we deserve this and i will bask in it for as long as I can. jeff had better be pregnant by the end of the show.

^ that’s his charlie smile 🥲

[ilyuu-archive]

update!

get ready folks this is a rollercoaster of emotions but uh, just to put this out here, it isn’t exactly good news

alright, so i think i’m gonna go ahead and quit writing for this blog. yeah, not exactly the best start to this - you think as a writer i’d know what words to use.

before anything - nope, i am not going to deactivate my blog, next best thing is to archive it since there’s so many memories that i like to at least keep, of my moots and of just a lot of things in general that i like to memorialize and a lot of writings and posts.

i want to keep them here because i want someone, whoever comes across it, to read whichever one and feel some semblance of comfort; that’s the main reason why i made this blog in the first place and that’s how i intend to leave it.

oh uh, yeah, for the reasons why i’m quitting, i can technically list a few :

genshin burnout : i don’t feel as strongly as i do for the game anymore, not as excited, even as fontaine was released, and stopped playing it a few months back. so, y’know, as genshin-centric this blog is, it’s technically a bit hard to try and get into something that you long lost interest for.

school : it’s catching me off-guard every time and even though i found a rhythm with my classes and schedule, it’s only asking for more of my time and, quite literally demanding. i’ll be honest and say that i can’t juggle a blog with a post every day and stay consistent with my schoolwork and what’s expected of me. i need to start thinking about my future.

spiraling thoughts : yup, you read that right; i’m back at it again with me thinking that my writing isn’t good enough and am doubting my skills as a writer as a whole, especially with my way of writing that as his poetic touch to it that’s making me wonder if it’s even worth anything at all.

with that, i think i just need to start writing for myself again because i haven’t felt that feeling for literally a while now.

have i thought about this for a while now? i have actually, somewhere in the middle of august but i was really, really hesitant for a lot of reasons.

said reasons being mainly my moots. i don’t like the ideas of leaving any of them behind at all, especially with them being the main reason why i love opening this app every day, seeing them flood my dash with everything that happened the night before, saying good morning, and seeing them in my notifs and inbox with their chaos and genuineness. i have so many memories here that i consider so dear to me because of each and every one of them, making my day and night, and… i don’t know, it’d suck to lose all of them.

@mikacynth : you were my first moot and i know i’ve mentioned and said this so many times to the point that you’d probably get sick of it but it did and does mean a lot to me knowing that you opened a door for me to meet so many others that made writing and just being on here amazing. you’re just so damn cool, creative, and nice and i’m so, so happy that i met you.

@floraldresvi : i don’t remember how i met you, and i’m so sorry for that vi, but you’re the kindest, absolutely gentle and attentive person i know and i just wonder how i ever got the chance to talk to you and be moots. i wish you nothing but the best because that’s all you deserve and more and you better keep that in mind vi.

@st0pthatsgay : this was a strangers to friends to lovers arc fr!! sorry i couldn’t help that, do you know how long i wanted to make that joke? but seriously, oli, you and your unbridled chaos and energy never fails to make my dash and quite literally everyone else who follows you like a rom-com movie or something; i’m so glad that i can call you a moot and one that i cherish so, so much.

@papiliotao : rei, you made my day whenever you drop in one of your small blurbs into my inbox and i get the space to just write whatever comes to mind; it was a little thing we had and, i don’t know, i loved it. i love it still a lot. it was like a duo we had and always made me smile with whatever we talked about, maybe just about writing in general or the cats that you always see. i’m just sorry that we won’t be able to have our wedding soon. really.

@supernova25 : bestie, i still remember those times about the ai bots!! i still think about them a lot!! it was fun!! in general, you’re always a lot of fun to talk to, and it could be about anything and it’d fly off the roof. also your asks about the most random of things has definitely made me feel better on my worst of days just to put that out there.

@soleillunne : i’d make a joke about you running up for the title of creator of angst and all that but you’ve always been so sweet so let me just push that aside, considerate as well; don’t think i didn’t see you send me links of anything scaramouche related because i do and i appreciate that so much

@hollythius-rising : YOU AND YOUR THEME CHANGES DON’T THINK I DON’T NOTICE THEM you’re also very very sweet and chaotic when it comes to your taste in tall purple men in lab coats but we don’t talk about that aosjksjs just that it’s always been a pleasure to talk to you whenever we have the chance to

@mondaymelon : YOU. we vibe with each other a lot like radio waves and it got me all giddy, and i’d just drop a lot of memes into your inbox just so i could see how you’d react only for you to give me a taste of my own medicine when you do the same thing 100 times more effectiveaisjsjs

@venusflwers : those late nights of playing roblox with you makes me feel so, so happy, you have no idea. it’s filled with crack with whatever you say and you somehow make a horror game feel like some comedy instead i swear; you’re literally the most unhinged and funniest person i met and i love that about you so much

@kazumist : it’s like a parent watching their kid grow up and then completely surpass them in terms of height. yeah, that’s you akiaki!! always frothing over your writing, your drabbles, because it had that soft and domestic feeling to them that i absolutely love to the moon and back

@m1shapanda, @snobwaffles, @vennnnn-diagram : you three are, excuse me for my language, so fucking amazing. i always wanted to talk to you so many times and even when i did, always hoped that we could’ve talked a bit more. misha, you’re so cool and i always wanted to just ramble with you; that and your art is so pretty and soft and just so DAMN COOL did i mention that? snob, you detective, you and your curse arts that make me laugh as much as pour bleach on my eyes (/j), you’re just so supportive and i really like that about you. ven, i wished we could’ve talked a lot more too with how just vibe with everyone so quickly and easily - you’re just as amazing, really.

and to all of my other moots, the same goes to you, even with the ones i didn’t talk to as much - just being moots with you, knowing that someone liked me like i liked them made me feel more belong on here and more a part of something. i’ve never been a part of something like this, and know so many people and to know that i mean something to them? yeah, that really, really means a lot to me.

i’d probably just be a lurker on here than anything… haven’t really thought that far, only that i know that i can’t stay on here any longer without feeling guilty, burdened, stressed, or all of the above. or maybe just start off as a smaller blog again without any sense of obligation because ever since i’ve hit 500, which was a while ago, that’s what this blog started to feel like with each bit of time that passed.

i’ve enjoyed it, of course i did, don’t get me wrong! i’ve just been enjoying it less than i did when i started off, that feeling of accomplishment and joy and pride at myself numbing a bit more with each milestone i passed. that’s just all me though, i’m sure.

anyways, not right now though, maybe just around the weekends when i actually have time to spare. so, until then, i’ll stick around here as much as i can. other than that, i don’t have much else to say other than thank you.

that i hope that you’ll keep doing what you love, whatever that is, despite the highs and lows. just know that the community you’re in is filled with people who love you through and through and that i do too - that you’ll do what you love because you want to, not because you should.

[jenicca-tribute]

Size Surprise: The Rollercoaster of Breast Size with Weight Changes

Hello, style-savvy readers and lovers of the buxom life! Today, let’s chat about the delightful unpredictability of breast size when you’re on the weight change rollercoaster. Whether you’re losing a few pounds or indulging in that extra slice of cake, your bust line seems to have a mind of its own!

The Surprise in the Mirror

Ever noticed how your breasts seem to play a game of catch-up with your weight changes? Lose a bit of weight, and they might shrink faster than your shopping budget post-holiday season. Gain a little, and they swell up like they’re getting ready for their own close-up. It’s like watching a thriller movie—never quite sure what’s going to happen next!

The Wardrobe Whiplash

Navigating your wardrobe through these changes can be a fashionista’s nightmare. That killer dress you bought last month? It fits everywhere but in the bust area, where it now seems you’re smuggling balloons. And let’s not even start on the button-down shirts that threaten to pop open and give everyone a show!

The Bra Tango

One of the biggest challenges? The dreaded bra tango! With every slight weight change, you’re either tightening the straps to avoid the saggy baggy look or loosening them to breathe. And buying new bras every few months can make your wallet weep harder than watching a rom-com.

The Compliment Conundrum

With changing breast sizes, the kind of compliments you get can shift dramatically. From ‘Are you working out?’ to ‘Wow, you look… healthy!’ it’s a wild ride of perceptions. Just smile and wave, folks, smile and wave.

Fitness Fiascos

And let’s not forget the gym workouts. With each jump and jog, it’s a physics experiment with gravity, inertia, and how much your sports bra can handle. You might start considering a personal assistant just to keep them in place!

In conclusion, living with fluctuating breast sizes is like being on an exciting yet bewildering theme park ride. Embrace the changes, invest in adjustable clothing, and keep your sense of humor about you. After all, life’s too short to wear boring bras or to keep from enjoying that extra piece of chocolate cake!

[onethattwaddles]

Drama Twaddling: 'Queen of Tears'

WELL, well, well… That was quite a drama, huh?

Almost a week later and I’m still here nursing a clingy heart. I’m not ready to let go of BaekHong yeeeeeet. And I know I’m not alone on this one so here’s a little (not) drama talk from me. So sit back and grab a cup of coffee ‘coz this is going to be a looooong discussion.

Finally, after a long squiggly wiggly rollercoaster ride, we’ve reached the end. (Two special episodes coming, though. Weehee!) I can’t believe two months just flew by and starting this week, no more waiting for BaekHong weekend. Anyway, pat and applaud yourselves for making it through the rough journey. And as hard as it is, now we say bye-bye to our lovely (and we-emptied-your-tear-bags) royal couple, Baek Hyun-woo and Hong Hae-in.

First of all, this is definitely one of those I came in for the package, I stayed for the cast.

If there was one thing to be applauded about this drama, it’s the casting. They anchored the show. I’m serious–I'd give a hundred if the rating were out of ten. That much. Because I could NEVER imagine anyone else playing BaekHong’s roles as perfectly as Soohyun and Jiwon did. They were practically Hyun-woo and Hae-in acting themselves. They said they were a bit awkward in the beginning but where in the world do you find people just standing side by side screaming chemistry like, hello? The wedding photos? Hyun-woo said they probably only met twice when they shot those but it gives off legit pre-nups. In the drama, with every little touch, you get this small tingling feeling. It’s so natural that you don’t even notice they’re acting even if the camera angle screams “Look! He’s touching her!” The spark’s just… there. *chef’s kiss*

And speaking of the cast, of course we can’t leave out the rest of them. If the main leads were good the supporting cast did not fall short. From the Hong Family to the Baek Family, Queens Group to Yondu-ri folks, friendships to usurpers–everyone nailed their roles! Bruh, the Mother-Son duo never failed to make an eye roll every time they appeared on the screen. They had, not only BaekHong in chokehold but even the whole watch-nation. Park Sung-hoon portrayed Yoon Eun-sung so convincingly that I’m starting to think he’s getting hate messages from all his “You can hate the character but please not the person” talks. (Because if it is so, what is wrong with you people?! Edit: I just read about it and that seems to be the case. Seriously, people?! Can’t separate reality from fiction now?)

And if I have the most generous love for the cast, I’m sorry I can’t say so for the writing.

Storywise, uhh... there were a few that I think were a bit of a shame.

For example, the overly abused the stars-aligned-the-universe-is-on-our-side motif? I wish they just made it so that kid Eun-sung saved kid Hae-in, which would explain this abnormal obsession because, to quote him, he liked her first and he saved her from drowning. Like, at least give him a proper reason to obsess, Writer-nim.

Or I wish Hyun-woo knew it was Hae-in he met in high school and who owned that MP3 player, so there would be more meaning as to why he kept it all this time. Prior? No, that would defeat the whole thing. While dating or in their marriage maybe. I just hope they didn't make it seem like the stars aligned for them to meet, but that they're both fighting for the universe to be on their side like a real married couple would do (just like what our Queen did in that propose scene. Pfft!). Especially in their case where everything's not working out. I think we already got a lot of that universe-is-on-our-side with the Truck of Doom and notebook incident. (I think there were others but I can’t remember.)

One thing I loved about Park Ji-eun’s previous work (Crash Landing On You) is because of the memories in North Korea. Here, I would have loved to see more Yongdu-ri and less Seoul during their MIA era. And I mean more interaction between the villagers and the BaekHong family. Like Hae-in and Dahye hanging out with Mi-seon and her gang, or Mommy Hong and Mommy Baek hanging out with villagers, washing veggies, cooking, drinking, etc. like Daddy Hong and Daddy Baek did. (And where on earth did Hoyeol run off to, with four-something episodes left?)

Also (okay, at this point, it’s probably not a “few things”), I wish there was more something to our usurpers. You know, like what caused them to go a-la-Parasite on the Queens? Hello! Backstory? I know we got Eun-sung being a child out of wedlock but any more reasons how, what, why Moh Seul-hee exists and why she was so desperate to steal Queens? Why the Hongs in the first place? And who on earth is Grace? How did she connect with them? I feel like the time spent on the dragging scenes should have been spent on their backgrounds (Moh, Dahye, Grace), even for just a few seconds of flashback. But I guess the not-knowing-everything part adds to their mystery.

Finally, I did not sign up for the long-term residency in makjang alley, Writer-nim. I figured we'd have to step foot in but not that long. There were needless makjang moments just going round and round it got exhausting. RomCom suddenly logged out and was out of reach. (Can't deny the top-tier execution of our main leads, though. It was beautifully heart-breaking.) And those Germany honeymoon scenes in the BTS, where were they?! Hing~! TT

I love second-chance tropes, especially when it’s between married couples. That’s what intrigued me about this drama in the first place (of course, after seeing the cast). And I’m sad that this could have landed a spot on my number one list. The first half was good－pacing and all. I like how the usually slow and dragging scenes were cut short and compressed in a few minutes. However, as it advanced, some areas that didn’t need dragging got dragged whereas scenes that needed to be included did not make it which made it a little... and I’m just gonna shut my mouth. *zips*

By the way, I read someone on X saying Writer Park Ji-eun got this drama copyrighted in 2010－which explains why I got an early 2000s vibe from the premise (and the always-wrong turn of the second-half plot)－so I get it, this is from the treasure chest. But you had a 14-year chance to tweak it, Writer-nim! *wriggles her neck*

Hang it all! At least we got a “and they lived happily ever after” and that’s all that matters. (Also, Hong Soobin! We finally got to see you, girl! Welcome to the world! Huhuhu! Now give your papa and mama the best and long life.)

With all that said, it’s time to re-watch the whole thing… because why not? *winks*

(Update: I just finished rewatching and there’s only one thing I can say: you HAVE to rewatch it. It helps you see it in a bigger picture.

While rewatching and having long discussions with my sister who also just finished it, she was able to identify why I felt like the second half was dragging. The problem was really the last two episodes.

It suddenly felt like we were watching a different drama. The reason why we’re all ‘Queens (and Kings) of Tears’ is because we were watching Hae-in fighting to live, with her husband beside her through it all, going against the odds together. But in those last two episodes, I felt like a post-surgery Hae-in, suddenly lost and unaware of what was happening. I feel like if Hae-in survived the surgery and lost her memory, we didn’t need to see it anymore. The whole point of the show was to know if there was a cure for such an illness and if she survived it. But there was too much focus on the usurpers while so little information about their purpose.

Sis suggested something and I couldn’t agree more: end the show in episode 14 with the last scene of episode 16 just to show they lived happily ever lifetime. Honestly, the last two episodes were more of a fan service. While I have a few other minor comments (some mentioned above), let's just let go and move on. HAHAHA!)

[celestialtrolls]

Showtime

[Prelude] [Part 1]

The past couple of days had been a rollercoaster of anxiety, keeping out of the line of sight of windows, and a very fast masterclass in Suits Carnival from Kerros, who of which kept avoiding your questions about whether he was still a part of the organisation that Aelynn loathed so much.

Your dreams are full of purple, with glowing crystals and growing darkness, influenced by what you’ve seen of the carnival only a few steps outside the safe walls of Kerro’s small house. You wonder whether even the higher-echelons within the fleet know even half the extent of what goes on here. Dread has come to sit in every crevice of your thoughts, and your sister's moirail has given up trying to calm you.

Your phone informs you that it's the 13th as you blearily try to rouse yourself out of bed. Today's your final day here. It's the day of The Show. Your chance to look around, observe your ancestor, and then run without ever looking back.

Or you could just run. Just get out, escape before anyone even has a chance to see you. But no. You can't, you can't. What would have been the point of coming all this way? Despite how far your vision reaches, you haven't seen even a hair of the Queen of Hearts. You're surrounded by her fortifications, but the hours you've spent trying to analyse the structure of her creations have taught you nothing.

If you leave without learning a single thing, you're going to-

You don't finish that thought.

"Renn, you ready to face the outside again?" Kerros knocks on his bedroom door - having leant it to you for the duration of your stay - opening it after a moment to stare at you with a tired expression. "They're gonna start letting outside folks in inna couple of hours, you got your shit togeth- like, your belongings... together?"

You raise your head from your phone screen, which you had just been staring at without even paying attention, the photo of your boat docked at the harbour disappearing as you clicked to lock it. The outside world was still there, unchanged, despite your stay here. You'll come to see what you can, and then leave. It's that straightforward.

"Yeah, remind me of the important stuff again one more time?"

You hadn't forgotten, but you found some reassurance in having the instruction fresh in your memory.

"Fuck's sake man." His tone is incredulous, but he indulges you regardless. "Don't mention fleet, don't mention other carnivals. If anyone asks, you have no affiliations. You're just a city boy, you don't know shit about no messiahs or grand purpose. Don't mention Aelynn. Someone says you look like her, you say you've never heard of her in your life. Don't approach the Creator. Especially don't talk to her. Even if she talks to you, just don't... don't open your mouth. Nod at the most, but avoid even that if you can. And don't attend the show. Don't go into any of the buildings."

"Okay."

"And try not to look anyone in the eyes. That's just sensible practice around these subjug fucks though, you should already know that. Centre of the forehead."

"Yeah."

"Don't. Mention. Aelynn."

"Wh-? You already-"

"I mean it. The second someone clocks that you're her brother, I can't tell you what might happen, but it's nothing good."

The seriousness in his expression sends a shiver down your spine, adding to the fear already freezing you.

"Yeah. I get it."

He shoots you a look before he exits the doorway back into the rest of the house, leaving it open as you pull your hoodie over your head and fix your eyepatch in place over the glowing mark in your iris. No paint. No symbol. You're just a perfectly generic purpleblood, visiting a carnival that you saw a poster for a while ago just out of sheer curiosity. Kerros leaves his hive before you, and you're left with the sound of your own thoughts. You glance at your phone one more time, wondering whether the sound of your moirail's voice would calm you... but you reconsider quickly, burying it back into your pocket. His potential fretting over you might make you feel worse.

In the distance, you hear a garbled shouting over a tinny loudspeaker, followed by the popping sound of fireworks. And so it begins.

-

The air is full of lights - quite literally, red hearts floating and swirling around above everyone's heads like fireflies, disappearing when someone's hand reaches up to capture some, only to reappear moments later. Music flows from every building along the main road, not loud enough to deafen, but enough that the shouts and shrill voices of the crowd are muted in comparison. Stalls fill the spaces between each tent and building, selling everything and providing the widest array of food smells, enough to overwhelm even the dullest of senses. Meats and candy, traditional stews and fruits doused in enough sugar to nullify anything healthy about it, huge punch bowls in a variety of suspicious colours, watered down beer in plastic cups, and everything and anything else that someone with a bit too much free time could imagine. The heart theme sticks though, whether that's the shape of the food or the fliers in the air, the balloons that are tied to younger trolls wrists as they dive through the crowd - red is almost, if not more prevalent than purple.

You might be stupid.

It's overwhelming, and you can see all of that all at once, a mile or more around from where-ever you stand on the main road, with no way to shut your eyes or any of your other senses from the chaos. It takes everything you have to try and get your legs to autopilot you towards the centre of the city. Trolls of almost all castes surround you, walking every which way. There's no system in place, and people mill about without purpose from shop to stall, from building to amusement.

If you weren't busy with the sensory assault, you might be shocked that so many non-purples were in attendance. But if this was a regular thing, you suppose they had a reputation for just being a fun night out? Kerros never revealed to you what The Show was, but if there were repeat visitors, surely it wasn't something too sinister.

The migraine starts forming faster than you hope, and your head is throbbing with pain by the time that you finally reach the town centre, the base of the huge tent - a building that externally looked like a typical, although unrealistically large, big-top circus tent - but you could see inside, the centre stage and it's seats, the corridors leading around to different zones, an absolute maze of a building.

It's empty however, though a line has already started forming at the entrance.

It's empty, apart from one thing, that at first, you didn't even recognise as a person. It looked more like the shell of a statue, a wireframe with a strange flesh amalgamation ins- Were those meant to be someone's organs?

The blood drains from your face as you truly start to understand what you're seeing.

You try to focus your attention elsewhere, but the infallible power of the vision you were granted provides you no mercy.

You might be stupid.

Your feet feel like they've become cement, an anchor to the ground that you can’t free by will alone. You have no time to panic, and it is an unpleasant but not necessarily unwelcome experience as a hefty blueblood knocks your shoulder as they push past you, sending you off balance and freeing your legs of their psychologically induced prison. You take advantage of the adrenaline and, while trying to keep your stomach still, you begin a march back towards the exit of the Suits Carnival.

You've seen enough. What were you even thinking? Someone who can create anything, who defied death itself to return after 600 sweeps? That's not someone you can understand.

You pause by a small colourful stall while you wait for people to move out of your path, and a voice brings you out of your thoughts.

"Oi, you seen a ghost boy? Looks like a drinker's used you as a juice box."

You turn your head to look at the speaker, a painted girl who looks younger than you, with odd mismatched pupils and white streaks through her fringe. She gives you a smile, and picks up a handful of boiled lemon candies to hold out for you.

"Oh, sorry I'm not bu-"

"Take them! You look like you're going to motherfucking collapse, and if you're gonna do that then you better do it away from my shop!"

Despite her crude wording, her tone is friendly, and you reach out to accept them, unwrapping one quickly to pop in your mouth. The sharp sour flavour shocks you a little, and pulls your mind to where you're standing.

"Thank you."

"You needed it! Your first show?" You nod. "You gotta come to one of the quieter ones first! Hearts always goes too hard, shit's craaazy!" No one else is coming up to the counter, and the crowd is still swarming behind you. "Only happens once a sweep though, can't be too mad! Queen's gotta flex on all us other suits, just how it is! Clubs’ is more fun though! I’ve only been here a couple of-"

You're content to let her monologue continue, the sour lemon flavour slowly fading to nothing as you nod along, taking the worst of the fear you were experiencing with it.

"Well, you look like you're feeling better, get your motherfucking ass back out there, make the most of it, alright? Oh-"

You're so fucking stupid.

The empty space beside you is filled as a small woman in a wide dress almost seems to materialise out of the crowd and steps forward. The friendly expression of the girl quickly changes to an anxious grin, her hands moving to grip the counter like a vice as if that was the only thing keeping her standing.

You can't make out the words the elder highblood says to the stall keeper. All you can hear is your heartbeat in your skull as you turn your head slightly to look at her with your uncovered eye.

Constantly, things are forming inside the shell that makes up her skin. You can see tiny crystals forming and then dissipating back into dust which flows like a liquid as she moves, like a constant purple kaleidoscope.

It's horrifying.

This is what you wanted?

"Ah, were you talking? Well Asteya, tell him to find me if you see him, yes? And you,"

Creator Ceremiré finally turns her head to look at you, dark purple eyes with glowing lilac rings meeting yours, and it takes everything to suppress every reaction you could have as her mouth forms a grin.

"Come and enjoy the Show, won't you?"

It is more of a threat than an invitation, not from the tone of her voice, not from any part of her non-existent body language, but you simply know it is. Years of fleet training and instinct manages to force a nod out of you regardless. You've never understood Aelynn's explanations about your ancestor better than now.

She disappears as suddenly as she appeared, seemingly content with the reaction, and before the girl behind the stall can turn her attention back to you, before your ancestor can realise that you have a familiar face, before anything else happens, you have already burst into a sprint, disappearing into the crowd.

[zergula]

Welcome to The Kingdom Of Kaodina

The Kingdom Of Kaodina welcomes you to our bustling yet ancient town! Our townsfolk are living their best lives as their ancestors did before them. It's a simple life in Kaodina but luckily, the townsfolk seem to have special abilities to make it a little more exciting! There's mischievous fairies, wicked witches, wild werewolves, vicious vampires, and even beautiful mermaids everywhere! There are fantasy homes, ruins, and lots of parks for your sim to explore!

I have played Moonlight Falls and Dragon Valley far too many times. I wanted a new fantasy/medieval/tudor world to play in so I decided to try making my own! I found this gorgeous map by JanasCreatives and just had to make my very own perfect new tudor town!

Interesting Characters

There are a lot of townies from Dragon Valley and Moonlight Falls here: The MacAnna Sisters, Robin Hooley, The Dolans, The O'Connells, The Goodfellows, The MacDuffs, Chaucey Grimm, Gladsten Farmwell, John Burb, Siobahn Murphy, Bailey and Chester Swain.

The Mudd Family is a farming family! They love to get their hands in the mud to plant, build, and more! You'll see them tending to their garden on their lovely lot all of the time!

The Blossom Fairies are best fairy friends and probably 99% responsible for all of the shenanigans around town.

Cordelia Morgan has been a resident of The Kingdom Of Kaodina since the beginning…mostly because they can't keep her out of Kaodina Bay. She is a daughter of the sea king!

Flora Root loves her little house on the peninsula. She can practice her alchemy potions, let her garden thrive, and all with an absolutely beautiful view!

Around Town

27 community lots 74 residential lots

There is lots to do in The Kingdom Of Kaodina! Along with all EA rabbitholes, there is:

Splash Mountain Rollercoaster by soocoolsim - set as a beach, your sims can lay under the sun, swim, snorkel, play in the water, or even ride an amazing rollercoaster!

Camp Plumbob by ruthlesskk - even medieval sims still like to camp so bring them down to this beach and pick your favorite tent!

Royal Bulldog Pub by XOX1 - you can definitely meet some interesting folks at this dive bar!

The Old Mill - a smaller version of SimGuruKitty's Old Mill, you can catch only the best fish here. It's the town's best secret

The Three Broomsticks by elle0808 - a lovely cafeteria where your sims can enjoy all kinds of different delicacies from around the world

Kaodina Market And Nectary - lots of fun trinkets to find here or sell your own! You will be surprised at the nectar selection as well!

Kaodina Entertainment District is where you will find the grocery store, theater, bijou, and a fun arcade with all games.

The Opera House And Casino is Kaodina's Live Show Venue where you can see your favorite performer, play some casino games, or both!

Country Bear Jamboree by Sandraelle - this is where all of the locals gather to have some fun

Kaodina Library has a lot of books and you can buy some at its bookstore, too! The Vault of Antiquity is here for all of your deep research needs. The Wyeth Institute art gallery is right next door!

Visit the Gypsy Camp by LariFari2009 to purchase potions and glimpse into your future…for a price, of course.

Prosperity Lounge and Casino by Joolster - a dance club with an underground live music room

Notre Dame de Paris by soocoolsim - an absolutely gorgeous recreation of the Notre Dame where your sims can get married, or get buried.

Kaodina Fire And Rescue - a small station on a big lot with everything you need for the firefighter career.

Construction Pete's Junkyard - a small junkyard with lots of treasures to be found!

The Duke Of Bows Renaissance Fair - store venue edited a bit by me and set as the town gym

The Kalua Pool by Snowmoon - a cool oasis pool ready for your next party

DunBroch Archery by Sandraelle - a recreational park where you can practice your archery, martial arts, or just enjoy the scenery

Orchard House - a community garden hangout with a working tractor so you can grab those goodies even faster. Who says a medieval town can't be a little modern?

Other Important Info

Kaodina is a medium world. I have all expansions, all stuff packs, and all store content so I am sure most of it is used in this save. If you do not have some of the items, the game will generate another item in its place. The only expansion not used is PETS so I am not sure how it will perform with pets and horses, etc. but there is plenty of room for them. This is a world save file so you will have to have the world installed in order to play the save file. In this download there is the world download and 3 save files:

KaodinaCommunityLots - this save is only the community lots, no residential houses

KaodinaUnpopulated - this is the final version of the save with zero households

KaodinaPopulated - this is the final version of the save with all households

There is zero custom content in this save

I hope you enjoy! Please tag me @zergula or hashtag #kaodina in any posts or photos you share because I would love to see them. You can check out my other world saves here: River Falls and here: Simarellen Happy simming!

SIMFILESHAREDOWNLOAD

[morgandria]

Still here, just quiet. October is my favourite month, but it always seems to disappear so fast.

Doing all the usual things: fighting to keep the kitchen clean, having migraines, cursing my broken digestive system. But I made my roasted root veg autumn soup. We did get to see the aurora, eventually. I rode some rollercoasters with a friend we don't get to see much and surprised with a day at the park. I have been baking autumnal things that are tasty. Everything's pretty ok - I'm just trying to keep myself relatively balanced.

As much as I don't want the weather turning warm again, I will take advantage of it this week and put the yard stuff away for the winter. I am probably the only one looking forward to the snow, but I am so ready for the kind of silence it brings to the world. I think I will be waiting for that silence longer than I'd like, though.

I owe some folks a visit stateside, but I’d be lying if I said I wasn't eyeing the election down south with some trepidation. I can't say I’d have much desire to cross the border if the orange dipshit gets voted back into office. He wasn't fit for purpose the first time and he's even more clearly in some kind of cognitive decline now. He and his three-ring criminal circus are just one big authoritarian grift looking to get back into power because he's so desperate to stay out of jail. I don't understand how people can carry water for this asshat and vote against their own welfare. But I digress.

Samhain's creeping up fast. I have soul cakes to bake, a leg of lamb to roast, some jewelry to finish, some altar stuff to paint before I go. If I feel brave I might try making some candy apples. And I might sneak in a few more rollercoaster rides, in between.

[hosh-rubaa]

Ladies and gentlemen, hold on to your seats because today's emotional rollercoaster is about to take off!!! The heart's weather report is just in, and it seems we're in for a wild ride.

Dark clouds of anxiety are doing their menacing dance in the sky, getting ready to unleash their attack.

And oh boy, here comes the star of the show—panic attacks! They're making their grand entrance, wreaking havoc and leaving me in a state of absolute confusion.

But wait, there's more!!!! The heart seems to have developed its own unique language, a mysterious mix of weird sensations and unexplainable pain. It's like a secret code only the heart knows, and it's playing tricks on me lol..

So, folks, buckle up and stay tuned as we unravel the bizarre world of my anxious adventures. Will I survive this mysterious ordeal or become a wandering spirit? The answer is just around the corner, Stay tuned!!!

—Nyx

[radashes]

Book review: 'SHATTER ME' SERIES

Entering the world of the 'Shatter Me' series was like embarking on a rollercoaster ride, filled with highs and lows, twists and turns. With each installment, I found myself swept away by Tahereh Mafi's captivating storytelling, but also grappling with my own conflicting emotions. Here's a breakdown of my journey through the series, from the heights of adoration to the depths of disappointment.

SHATTER ME #1: 4/5 stars I rated this book 4 stars instead of 5 because I'm not a fan of Adam and Juliette as a couple. Juliette's affection for Adam seems more based on his kindness to her in the past and his ability to touch her, rather than genuine love. Adam's obsession with Juliette feels cliché and cringeworthy to me.

However, I still like Adam as a character overall. The plot and characters like Kenji and especially Warner are fantastic though. Warner's complexity as a character makes him stand out.

DESTROY ME #1.5 [NOVELLA]: 5/5 stars

Wow, Aaron Warner really steals the show. His depth of emotion in this novella is just so well-written. You can really feel his complex feelings, not just towards Juliette, but also in his relationship with Delalieu, which is surprisingly cute. And those dreams? They add such an intriguing layer to the story. And don't even get me started on the quotes - they're just perfection!

Seriously, if you're a Warner fan, you absolutely need to read this. It's a solid 5/5 heartbreaking stars from me.

This novella is an essential read for anyone invested in the series. As you dive into Warner's psyche, you'll feel the weight of his emotions pressing down on you. It's like he's a whirlwind of disappointment, trauma, and anger all bundled up in a 19-year-old boy. But despite all the pain and suffering, you can't help but empathize with him. You start to see the walls he's built around himself and understand why he acts the way he does. It's a real eye-opener that sheds light on every decision he made in the first book.

Fair warning, though - once you finish this novella, there's no turning back. Warner will completely shatter your heart into pieces, and you'll be left utterly captivated by him. I mean, I couldn't even put this novella down, and that rarely happens with novellas!

UNRAVEL ME #2: 4.5/5 stars

This book was so close to perfection. I loved it so much but the ending kind of messed it up for me. It was underwhelming as the whole book.

This book, this world – it's all messed up, yet people keep on living. It blows my mind how they manage to survive, rebels, soldiers, regular folks, all facing terror every day. It's wild.

Lots of folks rag on Juliette, saying she's weak, self-absorbed, always wrapped up in her own drama. But I get where she's coming from. Life's tough, you know? Juliette's been through hell and back. Treated like trash her whole life, it's no wonder she struggles to see herself as anything but a monster. And when she finally starts feeling human again, it's ripped away from her. But she lets it go, showing her humanity.

Her relationships, especially with Adam, get a lot of flack. People say it's not real, just based on need. But with Warner, it's different. Despite his tough exterior, Juliette sees his softer side.

IGNITE ME #3: 5/5 stars

I get it. I FINALLY GET THE HYPE of this series!

This book is the reason why Aaron warner is our golden boy. That guy is the definition of swoon-worthy. Every word out of his mouth had me melting into a puddle on the floor.

Kenji, though? He's the real MVP. I swear, if I wasn't so head over heels for Warner, Kenji would be stealing the show. His humor just brings so much light to everything, you know?

But Adam? Ugh, don't even get me started on him. Every time he showed up, I was ready to throw my book across the room. Seriously, why couldn't Mafi just have Warner toss him off a cliff or something?

But let's talk about the romance. Holy smokes, it was on fire! I lost count of how many scenes had me squealing out loud. Warnette forever, am I right? That pager scene? And "lyhfml"? Absolute perfection.

RESTORE ME #4: 3/5 stars

Wow, that ending though! I'm still trying to process it, honestly.

So, let's get into it. While I didn't love this book as much as "Ignite Me," those secrets and lies had me hooked! But seriously, all that miscommunication? It stressed me out big time. Like, can these characters just talk to each other already?

And Juliette... girl, what happened? She went from confident and strong to clueless and insecure. But hey, she's still the supreme commander, even if she's not sure what to do with all that power. I guess we all make dumb decisions sometimes, right?

But let's talk about the hot stuff. Juliette laying down the law? Scorching! And Kenji? Always a bright spot. His friendship with Juliette and his bond with Warner? Pure gold. And Nazeera? Badass.

Now, Warner. My heart breaks for him. His vulnerability, his anxiety - it's all too real. And that childhood trauma? Heart-wrenching. But eating a cookie with a knife and fork? Classic Warner.

And his love for Juliette? It's sickeningly sweet. He'd do anything for her, and it's both beautiful and agonizing to watch.

Overall, this book had its flaws.

DEFY ME #5: 2.5/5 stars

I gotta be real here. This book left me scratching my head. Like, what was even the point? It felt like Tahereh Mafi was just stretching the story out for the sake of it. And those twists? They were more confusing than anything else. It's like she was trying to shock us without really adding anything meaningful to the plot.

Don't get me wrong, I love Mafi's writing, but this one fell flat for me. The characters I adore, like Kenji and Warner, were still solid, but the rest felt kinda irrelevant. And what's up with the whole Juliette-now-Ella thing? She'll always be Juliette to me.

Speaking of ships, Juliette and Warner? Total goals. They're the only reason I'm considering picking up book six. Oh, and I can't forget about Kenji. That guy deserves all the happiness in the world.

Overall, this book felt like a filler episode of a TV show. Not terrible, but definitely not essential. I'll stick to pretending the series ended at book three.

And can we talk about that cover? Seriously, did they just tweak the old one and call it a day? At least give us something fresh!

Oh, and a heads up for anyone thinking about diving in - there are some heavy topics like parental abuse and suicidal thoughts in here, so tread carefully.

IMAGINE ME #6: 3.5/5 stars

This series should've wrapped up neatly with "Ignite Me." Life would've been good. But nope, we got hit with "Restore Me," and it's been a rollercoaster of disappointment since then.

Honestly, going into this book, I had zero expectations. And you know what? I'm kinda glad about that because what I got was not what I expected at all.

Let's start with the positives. Tahereh's writing? Still top-notch. I mean, how does she come up with those poetic sentences? And Kenji? Bless his soul. That guy was carrying the weight of the whole story on his back, trying to keep everyone together.

But then we got Adam, who's still as irrelevant as ever. And don't even get me started on Warner. He went from being tolerable to downright insufferable. And Juliette? Where did she even go? She went from badass to passive, and it's just frustrating to watch.

The worldbuilding and plot? Yeah, still confused. And that ending? Talk about rushed and unsatisfying. So many loose ends, so many unanswered questions. And that epilogue? Don't even get me started.

In the end, the only enjoyment I got out of this mess was from Kenji's inner thoughts. That guy's a gem, always finding a way to lighten the mood.

Seriously, Mafi, this series should've stayed a trilogy. Don't even think about coming back with more books later on. I'll riot, but let's be real, I'll probably still end up reading them because I'm a glutton for punishment.

BELIEVE ME #7 [NOVELLA]: 5/5 stars

Let me tell you, when I heard about this new book coming out, I was hyped! "Imagine Me" didn't quite give us the closure we needed, so I was ready to dive back into this world.

And Aaron Warner? Damn, that guy knows how to turn up the heat. Chapter 8? I was not prepared for that level of steaminess. I thought we'd get a fade to black moment, but by the end of it, I was sweating buckets. My legs? Let's just say they were done for!

But beyond the romance, I was really digging the world-building in this book. Finally getting some insight into their plans to restore the planet was a breath of fresh air after the uncertainty of "Imagine Me."

But man, these characters? They feel like family to me. Seeing them find happiness just warms my heart. It's like revisiting old friends after all these years.

There are some more novella like:

"Destroy Me" - Aaron Warner's point of view

"Fracture Me" - Adam Kent's point of view

"Shadow Me" - Kenji Kishimoto's point of view

"Reveal Me" - Kenji Kishimoto's point of view

"Imagine Me" - Juliette Ferrars' (Ella Sommers') point of view

"Believe Me" - Aaron Warner's point of view

So there you have it, folks! 'Shatter Me' series has taken us on one wild adventure. Whether you loved it, hated it, or fell somewhere in between, one thing's for sure: Tahereh Mafi has given us a story to remember. And with that, it's time to bid adieu to Juliette, Warner, Kenji, and the rest of the crew. Until next time, happy reading!

[mystery-star]

Wow I can’t believe that 2023 is now (almost) over. So much has happened this year and in retrospect I am quite glad about all of it, even what first seemed negative. Just a short overview:

I finished my apprenticeship and everything that came with it (final project, diploma celebration, graduation trip, finishing school etc)

Started a new job after the apprenticeship (tho in the same company) and the team is so nice.

The name change on Tumblr and definitely cutting all strings to HP

Instead getting back into LOTR and Star Trek that were two old fandoms

Therefore also picking up 3 old fanfics again and actually publishing or continuing them

The Russell discord gaining more life and finding all those amazing friends there, love you so much folks!

And generally having made a few more friends on Tumblr/deepened friendship with others, you all are SO. AMAZING. too.

Getting in to gifmaking and finally gaining more traction for my blog again

Started reading (more) books again and love it just as much as I used to years ago.

Started a second blog about mental health and all because I did research and self diagnosed myself (I might share that later when I feel ready)

And in relation to this of course having learned a lot about myself

Also can’t believe I turned 25 that year, like wow in my head I’m still 20 or so.

Getting back into drawing and actually starting to like it

Changing a medicine recipe that gives me less side effects and therefore improving life-quality

Getting diagnosed with leg length discrepancy and being prescribed inlays for my shoes that I need to wear everyday now.

Downloading a Self-care app that gives me life routine and all and motivates me to do stuff I always postponed or forgot

And of course watching a lot more Russell Crowe movies (and rewatching known ones)

Emotional rollercoaster like all the time since summer

Getting an assessment talk at a therapist for next year that if everything goes well I can get into therapy (and get an official diagnosis)

and of course a lot more, like tiny little things everyday that often moved me deeply

Would like to tag all fantastic people I met that year but I’m sure I’d forget some and wouldn’t want anyone to feel left out.

And even if we only shortly or never interacted in 2023 or before I still love you and wish you all the best for  the coming year!

That being said: I wish everyone a HAPPY NEW YEAR and a great 2024!!