#get in the FUCKING CAR
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Officer: "So I hear you go down?"
Me: "That's original [grinning]" (I don't know why I said it, it just kinda came out, and I immediately regretted the smirk)
Officer: "Funny. How about we take a ride downtown?"
Well that soon wiped the smile off my face.
Officer: "Yeah, though not. Now get in the fucking car and make it up to me."
Me: "You mean . . .?"
Officer: "I'm gonna unzip, and you're gonna go down, suck my fucking dick, and put a smile on my face."
Now that I could do.
He was pretty aggressive and very verbal throughout, forcibly holding down my head as he spewed, issuing a non-negotiable "stay the fuck down and swallow!" command, which was absolutely to be obeyed.
When he finally let up, he said, "I expect a little more cooperation next time. Now get the fuck out" before heading back out on duty.
I saw him two days later coming out of a service station on the outskirts of town. "How about a little cooperation?" he barked, curtly, motioning for me to follow him around the back. He leaned back against a wall and unzipped, as I dropped to my knees, looked up, and said "I'll cooperate in any way you like". "I know you will", he sighed, effortlessly gliding my mouth over his shaft and rhythmically using my mouth to relieve himself of his load, only this time it was a little gentler and a much quicker.
Now that he knows he can get what he wants, when he wants it, and how he wants it, he'll call on me for regular service.
#I hear you go down?#i hear you swallow#get in the fucking car#get in the car#get in#get in and go down#make it up to me#you're gonna suck my dick#suck my fucking dick
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real shit morty unrelated do we need to get you back on antidepressants or what
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Surprised Tavvy wasn’t already dead when they got there. They were taking their sweet fucking time listening to Kieran exposition dump (all information that could probably have been shared AFTER they saved their seven year old brother from becoming a human sacrifice by a man he trusts)
#get in the FUCKING CAR#rereading tsc#lady midnight#the dark artifices#the dark Artifaces spoiler#lady midnight spoilers
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what is with men being mad any time a woman raises her voice where did that even come from. someone posted a video of a small electrical explosion, and the top comment was of course the woman screams. the second comment is women try not to scream challenge, level impossible. i had to go back and watch the video again. there is, somewhat fainty, a little gasp emitted off-camera, more of a yelp than a scream. it is mostly lost in the crack of the explosion. afterwards, you hear her voice, shaken, say, are you okay?
i am helping one of my friends train her voice pitch lower, because she wants to be taken seriously at work. she and i do each other's nails and talk about gender roles; and how - due to our appearance - neither of us have ever been able to be "hysterical" in public. we both appear young and sweet and feminine. she is cisgender, and cannot use her natural voice in her profession because people keep saying she appears to be "vapid". we both try to figure out if our purposeful voice lowering is technically sexist. is it promoting something when you are a victim to it?
a storm almost sends a pole through a car window. in the dashcam, you can hear the woman passenger say her partner's name twice, crying out in alarm. she sounds terrified. in the comments, she is lambasted for her lack of calm. how is that even fucking helping?
in high school, i taught myself to have a lower voice. i had been recorded when i was genuinely (and righteously) upset; and i hated how my voice sounded on the phone speakers when it was played back. i was defending my mom, and my voice cracked with emotion. it meant i was no longer winning the argument: i was just shrieking about it.
girls meet each other after a long summer and let out a little joyful scream. this usually stops around 12-14, because people will not tolerate this display of affection (as it has the effect of being passingly annoying). something about the fact that little girls can't ever even be annoying. we are trained to examine each part of our lives (even joy) for anything that could make us upsetting and disgusting. they act like teenage girls are breaking into houses and shrieking you awake at 3 in the morning. speaking as a public school educator: trust me, it's not that bad, you can just roll your eyes and move on. it does not compare to the ways boys end up being annoying: slurs in graffiti, purposefully mocking your body, following you after you said no. you know, just boy things.
there's another video of a man who is not allowed to yell in the house, so he snaps his fingers when he's excited about soccer. the comments are full of angry men, talking about how their brother is unfairly caged. let him express himself and this is terrible to do to someone. eventually the couple has to address it in a second video: they are married with a newborn baby. he was trying not to wake the infant up. there is no comment on the fact women are not allowed to yell indoors. or the fact that it could have been really alarming or triggering for his wife. sometimes i wonder if straight men even like women, if they even enjoy being in relationships with them.
for the longest time, i hated roller coasters because it always felt inappropriate and uncomfortable for me to scream. one of my friends called me on it, said it was unusual i'm so unwilling. i had to go to my therapist about it. i don't like to scream because i was not raised in a safe situation, and raising my voice would have brought unsafe attention towards me. even when i am supposed to scream, it feels shameful, guilty. i was not treated kindly, so i lack a basic form of self-protection. this is not a natural response. it is not good that in a situation of high adrenaline - i shut up about it.
something very bad is happening, i think. in between all the beauty standards and the stuff i've already discussed - this one feels new and cruel in a way i can't quite express. yes, it's scary and silencing. but there's something about how direct it is - that so many men agree with the sentiment that women should never yell, even in an emergency - it feels different.
is the word shriek gendered automatically? how about shrill or screech? in self defense class, one of the first things they tell you is to yell, as loud and as shrilly as you can. they say it will feel rude. most women will not do this. you need to practice overcoming the social pressure and just scream.
most women do not cry out, even when it's bad. we do not report it. we walk faster. we do not make a scene. what would be the point of doing anything else? no matter what we do, we don't get taken seriously. it is a joke to them. an instagram caption punchline. we have to present ourselves as silent, beautiful, captivating - "valuable."
a woman is outside watching her kids when someone throws a firecracker at them. she screams and runs towards her children. in the comments, grown men flock together in the thousands: god. women are so annoying.
#warm up#writeblr#this one has bothered me for a bit#any time a woman does something even passingly annoying we treat it like a fucking crime#hey man. women are allowed to be annoying. everyone forever is allowed to be passingly annoying#as long as they aren't hurting anyone/thing#like u wanna know something? i find it super annoying that men don't wear seatbelts#why arent there thousands of comments on driving videos thats just like : men try not to die in a car crash challenge#''this briefly annoyed me''. okay??????? AND????????????????? go get ur self a cookie and calm down about it#ur not entitled to control other ppl's experiences and emotions just so u can maintain ur own peace#if being briefly annoyed ruins ur whole day! you! need! therapy!!!!#men try not to become immediately angry about nothing challenge: level impossible#ps author is nonbinary. we didn't even get into the gender presentation thing#the fact men think it's SEXY that my voice is on the lower end....
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dick picking jason up from a random address like a divorced mother picking her child up from school
#jason sends over an address like an olive branch when he knows dick and bruce have been fighting#dick shows up and jasons like: fuck our old man amirite#dicks like: uhhuh. get in the car.#ooc but im self aware so idc#boombaux art#fanart#art#sketch#digital sketch#digital art#dc#dc comics#dcu#dick grayson#nightwing#jason todd#red hood#dc robin#batfamily#batfam
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the easy grip on the knife. the leg over the seat. the hand over the other seat. the sassy "come get it" move. you know the bitch is smiling behind that mask even as he said the line.
#i can't believe i'm saying this#DEADPOOL CAN GET IT#Logan I'm sobbing I understand why you lunged at him#I would too bestie#it's the sass for me folks#paint that car white as much as they painted it red my god#a deadpool thirst post? from me? more likely than you'd think#this is a branch in realities i know it#i've never had Feelings for this motherfucker until this movie#all i'm left with is anger now because WHAT DOES HE WANT FROM ME#camera crew could have just made it landscape but noooooo they had to do a medium shot of this son of a bitch#i'm sending an especially affectionate fuck you in ryan reynolds' direction#i love how you love deadpool#deadpool#wolverine#deadpool and wolverine#wade wilson#logan howlett#poolverine#deadclaws#don't get me wrong i've always adored deadpool's personality. nobody's that hilarious and not have humongous balls i mean trauma.#but i've never went 'why he kinda' until this specific shot right here#@ camera crew why the fuck did you zoom in? WHY?#for me? well it's infuriating#do it again#gif is credit to the owner#30 tags aren't enough for me to dismantle how this shot made me feel. tumblr you gotta update#damn tumblr i'm tryna feed a village here#guys just find my other post
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MK JUMPSCARE
#polls#fluffy poll#which car brand is your enemy?#edit: MWHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA#GET FUCKED#OP SAYS FUCK YOUR TESLAS 🖕🖕🖕🖕🖕#edit 2.0: MK is a character in a Lego show and his name stands for Main Karacter
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dungeon meshi is my favorite road-trip comedy film
#dungeon meshi#my art#laios thorden#senshi#marcille#chilchuck#chilchack#izatsumi#laois#laius thorden#sorry guys I don’t know which spelling is correct here#chilchucks car is a beat up beige Honda civic#laois never got a license because even though he’s actually a good driver he just never cared enough to do it#plus he wants to travel in some wacky way. like on a five person tandem bicycle or some shit#marcille never got a license because just fucking look at her#plus she gets motion sick in cars. she just would#senshi walks everywhere and has no need for cars#izatsumi just learned what a car was two days ago and she’s pissed that chilchuck doesn’t have a lambo#chilchuck doesn’t have time for any of this. he has to get his daughter to soccer practice at 5
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y'know every time i feel guilty about bothering someone by singing along when i'm listening to music, i just remember that i have to tolerate my dirtbag brother screaming at his ps5 for hours every day so listening to muffled off-key fall out boy is probably preferable
#ramble#it's not loud btw it's just like. singing along in the car volume#not to get on my soapbox but there's a literal dent in his wall from his controller. and we're in the uk you CANNOT punch through walls#idk about anyone else but i've NEVER yelled at a video game?? like i'm absolute dogshit at 80% of them#and i've never had a PHYSICAL reaction beyond maybe 'ughh' then turning it off#if you're getting that angry maybe you just need to play different games because you're clearly not having fun#also added bonus that i didn't realise until adulthood. as a former daughter#cis son privileges are CRAZY#i don't even swear in front of my parents and my dude is just screaming actual slurs next door with NO consequences#like you wouldn't do that in public why is it ok to do it here#i think i've said fuck in front of my mum ONCE and i literally couldn't look at her the entire day#this is a box i am not ready to unpack yet akdhdh#is this just a my family thing or is this common
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I just want to say I have absolutely 0 sympathy whatsoever for anyone complaining about anything homeless people do. oh you saw human shit on the ground?? hmm maybe it's because THEY DONT HAVE A TOILET. oh you saw someone cleaning themselves in a public restroom? maybe because THEY DONT HAVE A FUCKING SHOWER. oh no a homeless person is living in a tent and you think it's ugly?? CRY ABOUT IT IN YOUR FUCKING HOUSE. oh my goodness homeless people sleeping on the ground and they're in your way!!!! yeah THEY DONT HAVE A BED
if seeing homeless people bothers you that much then good news! you have some choices! 1) let them all live with you in your house! 2) start pressuring your local government to stop criminalizing the homeless and start giving them financial and medical assistance! 3) shut the fuck up and die!
#the way people whove never been homeless view homelessness os disgusting#acquire some human compassion idiot#'but they are reportong am increase in crimes from the homeless!!!!' yeah 90% of that is trespassing because they dared to sit down#you can also get arrested for sleeping in your car in many places! or asking people for money so you dont statve to death!#so once again shut the fuck up and die!!
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Uh-oh, someone’s in a mood. Fortunately, I know just the thing to fix that.
#you're late#don't keep him waiting#he's not happy#you'd better be good#what time do you call this?#get in the fucking car#in desperate need#he's not pulling out
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god these fuckin assholes. this whole website is a hellhole.
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When the Robins were too young to convincingly pass as drivers, they'd always insist that Bruce drive them to school or anyplace they were running late to, because Bruce's extensive illegal racing experience meant they were guaranteed to make it there on time. Or even early sometimes.
#You know that old meme where that Gorbachev was driving that one time instead of his driver#and the polizei dudes went “no way in fucking hell am I arresting anyone important enough for Gorbachev to drive around”#It's that#THey see the prince of the city behind the wheel and the cops assume he's got a decent reason for breaking every speed limit and rule of th#road#alfred chills with the kid in the back and nearly knocks his head against the window thrice#GPS squinting at their time: “how the hell did you get there in five minutes?”#Bruce pulling up to the parking lot with smoking car tyres#to the horror of the other PTA parents#dc comics#bruce wayne#batfamily#batman#personal#dick grayson#jason todd#Damian wayne#i guess#I do not see Timmy or Cass requiring this#Stephanie brown#maybe
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shawn's deep trust of lassiter keeps catching me so off-guard like when he's held captive and lassie and henry both turn up he tries to yell "carlton" not "dad" and when he sees a guy with a gun come into the restaurant he goes straight for lassie and keeps trying to get his attention instead of literally any of the other dozens of cops in the room with them and when he's telling someone to call the police he tells them to ask for lassiter, not jules, not vick, lassiter. like he spends all his time provoking lassie but the second there's danger there's literally no one else he trusts more
#psych#shawn spencer#carlton lassiter#shassie#like#what the hell man#also lassie calling him 'shawn' all through shawn takes a shot in the dark was Something#i know it's because he was with henry and it would have been weird to last name him to his dad#but still it was wild#AND shawn tried to call out to him as 'carlton' in the same episode??? hello???#and the moment where lassie stops the car and shawn immediately holds the gun out for him is like#yeah they annoy each other so so much#but they're soooo in sync#they Get each other#they drive me fucking crazy like everyone on the show talks about shawn and gus's weird little thing#but no one mentions shawn and lassie's weird little thing#probably because lassie would shoot them but still
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i think i'm hilarious -- aka i made blood blossom danny au memes
all of these come from my DpxDC prompt "i am pushing the batdad agenda--" and it's corresponding additions in the reblogs ksdjlf.
i am. rotating them in my head. forever and always. personally i think there should be more batdad aus in dpxdc, their dynamic could be neat. :)
#THAT FIRST ONE TOOK ME A HOT MINUTE TO MAKE. i have never been more careful with a trackpad. imgflip doesnt have an undo button#i think its fucking hilarious#its a batdad au#danny fenton is not the ghost king#dpxdc#dpxdc crossover#dp x dc crossover#dp x dc#dc x dp#mmm i need to come up with a name for this au#found family ftw WHOOOO. i could just do a generic 'blood blossom au' tag but i want a specific one because i like being unique#eldest batkid danny au#chronically ill danny au#danny: im grateful he's helping me but im still kinda apprehensive...#battinson: vaults over a car to escape reporters. likes rock music. isn't fucking evil. punched a cop. actively looking for a cure#danny: ...huh. okay.#furiously pushing the batdad agenda for my own gain. just look at them guys. they're funny little guys.#unofficial witness protection to adoption pipeline.#bruce wayne accidental teen acquisition. save a teenager gain a son#its about the adventure of them going from strangers to friends to family :)#im bored of the bruce slander guys in the words of hermes from hadestown:#“[its] about someone who *tries”*#danny saw a funny man in a funny costume eat the side of a dumpster and has never related more with someone on a spiritual level#“brother eugh i feel that. oh heY WAIT HERO BUDDY?? SAME HAT??? SAME HAT?”#danny's been the only hero he's known since he was 13. on god he is leaping at this opportunity. like YES. PLEASE BE ANOTHER HERO#HELP ME GET AWAY FROM CERTIFIED CRAZY MAN. HELP. YOU'RE SCARY AND HIDING IN THE DARK. EVEN BETTER. HELP A BROTHER OUT HERE#blood blossom au#for the time being thats the name
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Really in the mood to drive out to a secluded area in the woods and then get bent over the hood of the car and fucked mercilessly. Starting out with my back against the car as they finger-fuck my hole open until I'm begging for their cock. Then they flip me over, push my top half down onto the hood and pull my hips towards them. Finally sinking their huge dripping cock into my needy hole while I bite my lip to stifle my moaning. They start fucking me at a brutal pace and slap my ass telling me, "aww don't worry, there's no one here but me to hear you, baby. So how about you stop holding back those slutty noises I love so much?"
#ugh sorry been thinking about how hot it is getting fucked in the hood of a car#i need to try it someday like sooooo#dude thoughtz#nsft#queer nsft#trans nsft#mlm nsft#ftm nsft#ftm sub#gay nsft#ftm bottom#ftm t4t#t4t nsft#subby men#subby boys
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