#generation kill fic

[lostinthewiind]

It's a crime how few Generation Kill fanfictions there are. Please send your requests I'd like to write some more Gen Kill fics!

[titaniumions]

in my mind kakania would have little to no problem accepting the fact that she is into women. however the thought of her being into isolde is something that would absolutely vex her, i think. while they did start off as casual acquaintances and friends, isolde is still her patient, and to some level kakania winds up being responsible for isolde's wellbeing. with that in mind, kakania can hardly fathom the thought of burdening isolde with her feelings, which she feels absolutely selfish for even indulging in. even if those feelings were to be returned, it still wouldn't put kakania's mind at rest. it still wouldn't be enough to get kakania to convince herself that she's fine with feeling this way. ultimately it's not necessarily internalized homophobia nor societal pressure that troubles her, but rather her own ethical and psychological concerns

it'd be even worse for her if those feelings didn't exactly ... go away even after everything that happened in chapter 6. she'd be overwhelmed with guilt, and think to herself that the best course of action would be to distance herself from isolde, but the most painful part is that even after seeing isolde at her worst, she still can't help but want to love isolde. even after kakania herself had presumably tainted isolde's perception of her. so what if that's what was necessary at the moment. after leaving isolde broken and shattered, how could kakania even dare to think she deserves to love isolde? if it once felt horribly wrong for kakania to be in love with her, everything that has transpired between them only served to make it worse!

[captainbobbin]

happy birthday, saix

[benevolenterrancy]

@hereticcryptid I appear to be slowly but surely developing an entire series about how Hensheng and Baxia apparently get fed up with their owners' inability to express their feelings and take matters into their own hands...

[liminalmemories21]

Comfort Fanfic Reccs

Okay, following on from @black-quadrant's post yesterday about comfort fandoms - what are your old school comfort fics? The ones from fandoms that haven't been active in yeeeaaars, but you've read so many times you can practically quote them.

With Six You Get Eggroll by @cesperanza (Due South - Fraser/Ray K - post series)

Ray burst out laughing. "Benny! You've developed a sense of humor!" "Yes, Ray." Fraser lowered the gun and showed him an amused look. "Six immaculate conceptions will do that to you."

Hide of a Life War by @etharei (Teen Wolf - Derek/Stiles)

“We have received confirmation that there is a hostage situation in progress at a warehouse compound two hours out of Los Angeles, following a multiple-vehicle pileup on Highway 101 this morning...” The one in which Stiles has lived to (legal) adulthood and, along the way, become a bit of a badass himself.

Illogical (√π233/hy7) by @waldorph (Star Trek Reboot - Kirk/Spock - AU)

If Kirk was a maths genius, and never took Pike up on the dare to do better, but still managed to get to Starfleet? This is what that would look like.

Domestic-verse by @gyzym (Inception - Arthur/Eames)

People you kiss in an airport baggage claim and then don't talk to for thirteen months shouldn't be able to exist, let alone make your chest do the things Arthur's chest is doing. There are rules.

The Age of Aquarius by @cesperanza (West Wing - Josh/Donna)

"You know," Toby said, pulling a cigar out of his inside coat pocket and regarding it thoughtfully, "I never found your relationship with Donna particularly baffling. I just figured you ran on sexual frustration like the rest of us."

Drastically Redefining Protocol by @rageprufrock (Merlin - Merlin/Arthur - AU)

In which Prince Arthur meets Merlin and all hell promptly breaks loose.

Don't You Shake Alone by @dsudis (Generation Kill - Nate/Brad)

Nate looked exactly like Brad always pictured him: exhausted in the full life-in-a-combat-zone sense of the word.

Retrograde by LtLJ (Stargate Atlantis - mostly Gen - eventually McKay/Shepard)

The Atlantis expedition has been lost for three years. SG-1 goes to find them, and arrives just a little too late.

Somewhere I Have Never Traveled by @seperis (Smallville - Clark/Lex)

Clark decides on a change of lifestyle. Lex decides on a change in the status quo. And the world's doomed.

Lust over Pendle-verse by AJ Hall (Harry Potter - Draco/Neville - yes, I know JKR is trash, the fic is still excellent)

Lust Over Pendle is a comedy of manners set in the Golden Age detective thriller genre, and is presumed to take place after the end of the seventh Harry Potter book, and, therefore, after the fall of Voldemort.

open tag, but specifically calling out some people I know have been around fandom for a while @alchemistc, @dadvans, @walkinginland, @freneticfloetry, @cecilyv, @sloganeer, @screamlet, @irispurpurea, @rcmclachlan, and @hereghostslive

[starry-bi-sky]

pouring one out for luo binghe in my disciple SQQ fic, poor guy has taken a backseat here. we're nearly 30k words deep and he hasn't even shown his face once. it'll be much longer before he even actually talks to Shen Qingqiu.

(i say im pouring one out but in reality im sitting in my director's chair chewing on a cigar and wearing a beret as he tearily and unsuccessfully pleads with me for more scenes with Shen Qingqiu)

[sunriseseance]

The thing is it's always been Klaus and Allison. They were the charming ones as kids, the faces of the academy, the pretty girl and the funny boy, both dripping Charisma. They were the popular ones, and the ones expected to pick up the academy's image when it fell, and the ones whose letters said things that the fire read before Reginald did. They were the first to get tattoed because their inherent (vacuous, terrifying) yearning for other people lead them to rebel. They were kids with feminine pieces in their souls in a situation that overwhelmingly rewarded masculinity. They were angry, and rebellious, and questioning, and comforting. They painted each other's nails, they talked about love and about getting out of that place. They took care of their siblings who were too busy being heroes to take care of themselves. They took care of each other when the others learned not to worry about them (they're fine! They're smiling, look, they're painting each other's nails. They don't care! They're fine!) and they've always had the same flaws too. They're selfish and angry and they don't know when to quit and they will do anything and hurt anyone to make it to the next minute alive and then they will want to die for what they've left in their wake, and they know that. They know that about each other. Like looking in a mirror.

They held each other tight in the 60s, they fought on the same side when they made it back home, they forgave each other and loved each other through all wrongdoings and they did so easily. And now Klaus helps Allison raise her daughter and stand herself and find her way back to humanity, and Allison helps Klaus find peace and shelter and warmth and HOME. It's ALWAYS been Allison and Klaus. Always.

[bossboudicca]

bradnate

virtual reality//rey

[zerosconsort]

Zero's Fic Binding - Every Marine a Wolfbrother

Every Marine a Wolfbrother by Dira Sudis

Fandom: Generation Kill

Main Ship: Brad Colbert/Nate Fick

Start date: 2/10/24

End Date: 5/26/24

Pages: 430

My first anthology. This is a collection of fics from Dira that I read….back when I was working in New York, so at least 6 years ago. I fell into this fic coming off a mad dash of reading everything under the sun related to A Companion to Wolves, which I found because of a Stony fic.

Built the iconography based off the marine corp logo and a queen wolf. The crown of starts was a stroke of late night inspiration that pays off REAL well. The flat mat black on this book cloth? Fire.

Anyway, I have never watched the show. Literary this was all the knowledge about Generation Kill I ever had before I started reading in this fandom. My inspiration came from the memo pads reporters use - so I wanted that flip notebook flare.

First TOC. This water damaged, gold fleck, hard used notebook idea also carries through the whole bind. We commit to a bit in this house.

The font here for the header, as well as for all of the drop caps and chapter tiles, is based off the Generation Kill show font. I wanted to treat the separate fics as chapters, and I liked the idea of keeping the tag lines for each part of the series here too. Credit pages is…probably a little much, but I also like all the info for all the fics separated.

Chapter headers are flecked with ink. Section brakes are a WIDE verity of hand-drawn lines and slashes.

End papers are a notebook grid paper style - my personal favorite - and portions of the book have grid paper hazed into the background of the pages. And there are wolves in the typeset, sprinkled around. So. Many. Wolves.

Chapter breaks got their own graphics. The colors match the whatever soldier/wolf the chapter is about. Yes, there was a chart. No, I cant remember all the wolves colors now - but Bo is gray and Frost is blue.

Final shot is my very sad first headband. And a great example of what happens if you don't trim your paper edges with the chisel flat and even - you get a visible arch on the foredge. You can see the rough cut of it on the TOC page too. I think this was my first time chisel trimming period, so...not bad.

If your looking for a solid novel's worth of yearning and emotionally constipated men, read this fic series. Even if you dont know anything about the show, this is a good read.

[otaku553]

A certain first encounter

[lostinthewiind]

Possible GK requests:

Corpsman reader who treats the women they see in villages and goes soft when she sees Doc with kids.

Supply officer reader who always hides lube for Walt’s gun cause she knows it jams more than the others.

Mechanic reader who can fix almost anything and keeps having to replace parts on Rays Humvee cause it’s shaking more than usual or it doesn’t sound quite right. Really he just likes how she looks covered in grease.

Reader everyone calls Mom cause she’s always taking care of them in the little ways, nagging them, giving advice but is bad at taking care of herself until Nate makes her (bonus if we can get a mom and dad are fighting in front of the kids line)

Literally as soon as I read these I got SO MAD that I have to go to work today and can't IMMEDIATELY start writing these!

Anon, you've bestowed upon me a precious gift today. I will NOT squander it. I will write these ASAP.

[mestos]

Man I don't even know. Deleted the last post because maybe I'm too hasty, seen how insulting it can be to be accused of AI generating shit, but my god! I cannot help but feel so much more for writers—writers who use words to craft their art, already fighting for a place in a world that prioritizes visual language/graphics over their medium, writers who are much quicker to be criticized than artists, writers who have to find a way to hone their crafts just so they keep your attention all the way to the end of their stories, writers who have no other means to present their creation and being told to pick up an entire other skill just to be appreciated in a community space, writers who are so much easily more exploited by AI generation because their medium is TEXT.

I don't fucking know dude. Sometimes it feels like people are fighting against AI art but not AI generated writing, voice acting, music or any other creative medium because visual graphics/language takes more precedence in this world, and everything else is secondary to it even though we are constantly preaching that all mediums are considered art

[luvo27]

just saw a pinterest comment that suggested learning how to crochet instead of learning how to knit because it's easier and i can't keep silent anymore i have to confess that i wrote my cass learns how to knit fic because i need people to love knitting in the same way that i need people to love cass. the crochet vs knitting metaphor argument exists because i've had that conversation (minus the metaphor and also it was jokingly silly with my friends) with me arguing the side of knitting and as much as i love projecting onto characters stephanie brown would never in her life be against crochet. she would adore crochet. i don't actually dislike crochet its good for things that knitting will never be able to do like baskets and is so much better for stuffed animals and i think it's better for things like bralettes and bags but knitting is so good for clothing it's stretchy and more flowy. crochet is so good for items that need to hold a little more structure but in my opinion knitting makes more comfortable clothing and crochet got so popular in the last couple of years but knitting did not and knitting is not more difficult!! knitting is fun and good and i love her!!!

[doyelikehaggis]

7 Days of Scarepairs: Sciles | Scott McCall x Stiles Stilinski (Teen Wolf) + “Grief”

Requested by @joanthangroff (TW mention of suicide attempt)

It was a long ride back from the motel. At least, it felt longer. Stiles' gaze burning holes in the side of his face wasn't making it go any faster, either. Scott could see his bouncing leg, hear his racing heart and smell the anxiety radiating off of him. Even if he were oblivious to all of that, he would still know something was wrong with him.

"Stiles," he said wearily, looking at him properly for the first time since Coach snatched his whistle back off of Lydia and told them to sit down. "Are you okay?"

"What? Oh, yeah. I'm fine. All good."

The way he glanced at him said otherwise. Scott raised his eyebrows pointedly and the leg bouncing stopped. Stiles ran a hand over his thigh and nodded jerkily as if reiterating that he was fine.

"Look, we're gonna figure this out, okay?" Scott assured him as best he could. "From what Ethan said, there's a good chance that Derek is alive. Once we get back to Beacon Hills, we can find him, and we can make a better plan. No one else is going to get hurt."

He just managed to bite back a promise. He knew he couldn't. He only hoped that it was the truth.

But Stiles stared at him like he could see right through him, his eyes narrowing. He parted his lips like he was going to retort, as he usually would, but instead, he just shook his head and turned to face the back of the seat in front of him. As he ran a hand over his face, Scott frowned.

"You're angry," he blurted out.

Stiles shook his head again and sighed. "No. No, Scotty, I'm not angry." His heart skipped but he acted like Scott couldn't hear it. "I'm just... I'm tired. Last night was..."

"I know," Scott said softly. His own heart skipped. "But the darach's not going to catch us by surprise like that again."

Stiles nodded, but he didn't say anything else. In fact, he didn't say anything else for the rest of the ride. Scott wanted to, but something stopped him. He took to staring out the window and letting his eyes unfocus as he repeated his plan to find Derek in his mind the whole way home.

*

The bus dropped them off at the school. Stiles insisted on driving Scott home, even though he had his bike. He didn't put up a fight - he just wanted to go home and see his mom before he did anything else. That phone call back at the motel had felt too real. He just needed to see her.

Of course, she was at work. Scott sighed when he found the note on the fridge, but he told himself not to overthink it. She was fine.

"Alright, well, I think we should go to Derek's loft first," he said, turning to Stiles who was lingering by the back door, his arms folded. "He'd most likely have gone back there to try and heal."

He frowned.

"Although, if the alpha pack are looking for him, that might be too obvious. Maybe we should try the animal clinic first. He could've gone to Deaton, right?"

He waited for Stiles to agree with him or suggest something he hadn't thought of because right then, all Scott had was a handful of guesses and maybes.

But Stiles didn't chime in. He shrugged when he realized Scott was looking at him.

"Stiles, are you sure you're okay?" he asked gently.

Stiles dragged a hand over his face and sighed again, his tongue in his cheek, and he could smell the irritation on him, just like when they were on the bus.

"You know what? No," he snapped, throwing his hand up. "No, Scott, I'm not okay, and, quite frankly, neither are you, and I don't get why we're just pretending that last night never happened. Because it did."

"Do you mean..." Scott couldn't quite get the words out, his throat closing up around them and forcing them back down. He shifted his feet, his gaze dropping to the ground for a moment. "The wolfsbane?"

"Yeah, I'm talking about the wolfsbane," Stiles said, his voice thick with emotion he was failing to contain. "More specifically, what the wolfsbane did to you, Scott."

Scott shook his head, his eyebrows drawing together as he tried to ignore the sick feeling weighing down on him. "It was just... you saw what it did to all of us. Ethan-"

"Tried to saw himself open, yeah," Stiles cut him off. "Probably something to do with his freakish ability to combine into one even more freakish mutation with Aiden. Isaac - he was hiding under his bed. Boyd and Lydia were hearing things. But you, Scott..."

He took a step toward him, and Scott watched his feet, observing every little detail of his shoes and the kitchen floor.

"Scott, you tried to kill yourself."

"It was just..."

"No. No, Scott, the wolfsbane brought out all of your biggest fears and just - just heightened your true emotions. Boyd's guilt about his sister, Isaac's fear of his dad, Lydia always being the one to find dead bodies. It wasn't the wolfsbane talking when you did that. Was it?"

Scott knew he had to give him an answer. He just didn't think either of them really wanted to hear it. The truth hung in the air between them, as suffocating as the gasoline that still clung to Scott's senses.

"It doesn't matter," he said quietly, then looked up to meet Stiles' disbelieving stare. "We need to find Derek. We can't waste any more time, we need-"

"Scott, stop! Can you even - you nearly died! Twice!"

"But I didn't-"

"Because someone stopped you! Allison literally had to sew you back together because you felt so guilty about Derek being dead that you were going to let yourself die, too! Scott, I had to talk you out of setting yourself on fire, how can you not - how do you not see how messed up that is?!"

"Stiles, I'm sorry about last night, okay? I shouldn't have... I should've fought the wolfsbane, or..."

Stiles just stared back at him, shaking his head incredulously. Finally, in a much softer voice, he said, "Scott, I don't want you to be sorry that I had to save you. I just... I just wanna know that you don't actually believe what you said last night."

It was a simple request. It would take just two words. And yet...

Scott opened his mouth. Then he shook his head and closed it again, looking away with a piercing pain where his healed wound was just yesterday.

"You have to admit that a lot of what we've gone through wouldn't have happened if I hadn't..."

"Hadn't what?" He looked back up to see the reason for the quiver in Stiles' voice; tears shone in his wide eyes. "Hadn't survived being bitten by Peter? That's what you meant, wasn't it?"

He tilted his head but he didn't get a chance to deny or confirm. Stiles already knew. He looked like he might crumble into a million pieces.

"Scott," he said, his voice cracking as he moved closer. "I don't care what's happened to us. I don't care about the murderous werewolves or - or the hunters, or any of the crazy supernatural things that keep happening around us, alright? Because we've survived it, but what I wouldn't have survived was losing my best friend."

Scott bit his tongue, his eyes stinging. Part of him wanted to point out all the bad things - the numerous times he's put his life in danger, the people who haven't survived the craziness of their world, and everything else.

Then Stiles really did crumble. "Scott, I meant what I said last night. And I can't lose you. I can't - you and my dad, you're all... you're all I've got, and I can't - Scotty, I can't lose you as well. I need you. And I know how selfish that is, but it's true. So, if you need a reason to - to believe that you should be alive, then there it is. Me, Scott. Make me your reason if you have to, or your mom, or even Allison, because I promise you that none of us would be better off if you weren't here."

"You'd be safe, at least."

He didn't mean to say it. It just slipped out.

"You don't know that," Stiles countered, then he shrugged. "And even if that was true - I don't care. Scott, I'd rather be in danger every day of my life from some supernatural threat than live without you."

He didn't know what to say to that. All he could do was surge forward and hug him. Stiles immediately wrapped his arms tight around him, as if he never intended to let go.

"I'm sorry," he repeated quietly into his shoulder.

"Just make me a promise, Scotty. Alright? Promise that you'll talk to me, so that, when you start blaming yourself for every bad thing that's ever happened, I can tell you what an idiot you are."

Scott chuckled and nodded. "I promise." Then, he softly added: "I mean it."

Stiles tightened his arms just a little more. Both of them savoured the feeling of the other against them. Solid. Real. Alive. Safe. For a moment, they were as physically intertwined as they were in every other way.

Scott knew they should look for Derek. They should come up with a plan to stop the darach. But he wasn't ready to let go of the first real feeling of comfort he'd felt in a while.

[cecilyv]

Comfort Fanfic Reccs

@liminalmemories21 tagged me in this and I just KNOW she knew I was going to (A) fall down like, a zillion rabbit holes, (B) sit there for a while trying to think of a story/author that was one the tip of my tongue but failing, and (C) then get upset again because, y'all, the internet is NOT FOREVER. Of course there are things this makes me happy about, but in this instance.

Okay, this is no way all of them. I am re-reader. I reread. I have been in fandom for over 30 years. I retain the right to post again later with more of these because I want my friends to get the pleasure of reading these for the first time or the thousandth time -- it's all the same.

Also some of these are sad. Some are happy. I've found that I go to all them for comfort, depending on the day.

freedom's just another word for nothing left to lose by synecdochic (SGA, Rodney/John).

"There is a gravestone in Arlington National Cemetery. It sits watch over an empty grave, and there is a vine with small blue flowers, one the gardeners can't identify from any book, twining up its side." I know I've mentioned it before, but this fic lives rent free in my brain and it's sad, and lovely, and sad, and thought provoking and lovely and just read it.

This is how it works by Lim

A connected rec: Lim, not my lim but another fandom Lim, made this video for/about freedom's just another word. I'm so glad it exists on the internet still. Scroll down in the link and you might have to hit play a few times to get it to load, but it's worth it. This is the vid that made me realize the power of vids AND introduced me to Regina Spektor, so, thank you lim.

Telegraph Avenue by hackthis (the O.C. -- Seth/OMC, Seth/Ryan)

I am, in fact, sending you to the wilds of livejournal because hackthis left fandom (mumbles under her breadth) years ago and none of her stuff exists on ao3 (if it does, please let me know because that would be amazing). Honestly, I rec all her stuff -- the generation kill, the inception, freaking neville longbottom/theodore nott -- read it all, even if it's on livejournal.

Pre-Existing Condition by Helenish (Die Hard, Matt Farrell/John McClane)

Okay, okay, bear with me. I had an incredibly difficult time figuring out which of Helenish's stories to link, but I went with this one because it's a showcase of -- I will follow this author anywhere and love it. I have read this story so many times. In Helenish, I trust and that's going to be a running theme here. Come for this one, stay for the Inception, SGA, Teen Wolf, and hockey rpf, if that's your bag. Apparently, helenish was my very first bookmark on ao3 which totally tracks.

Don't You Shake Alone by Dira Sudis (Generation Kill, Brad/Nate)

Nate looked exactly like Brad always pictured him: exhausted in the full life-in-a-combat-zone sense of the word. Nate has a baby and Brad shows up. I have read this oh, like, at least a dozen times. It hits every single one of my buttons.

Steinway!verse by toomuchplor (Inception, Arthur/Eames)

Being a freshman piano performance major at a prestigious New England conservatory is difficult enough without landing the school's star baritone as your singer, and inevitably, your hopeless crush.

Written by the Victors by Cesperanza (SGA)

Caroll, Franklin R. Atlantis Revisited. New York and London, Routledge, 2011. Chapman, Denise. Several Kinds of Genius: The Life of Rodney McKay. NY: Harper Perennial, 2015. Croft, Rosalind. City of Spires: A Memoir. Toronto: The Mercury Press, 2009. Dugan, Paul. A Political History of Atlantis. Oxford: OUP, 2012. This changed fandom and me, and go read it, if you haven't. Also, Lim recced With six you get eggroll which was, uh, maybe why I finally watched Due South.

Behind closed doors: collected oral histories of queer community in New York, 1930-1945. doi 10.1999/journal.amhistqstud.32557038 by wobblyheadeddollcaper (Captain America, Bucky/Steve)

Steve Rogers, supersoldier and inept historian, confronts the absence of evidence. Those who know me, know why.

Drastically Redefining Protocol by rageprufrock (Merlin, Arthur/Merlin)

Honestly, another author I follow to the ends of the earth. I know Lim recced it to, so hopefully you go read it.

Noblesse Oblige by Alethia (Generation Kill, Brad/Nate)

This was not a normal day. This day existed to prove that hell was real and it came with musical accompaniment by will.i.am. On this day, Steve figured out how to get him out of the office and torment him at the same time by sending him to the godforsaken DNC where it was all 'we shall overcome,' oh-happy-day bullshit. Which merely justified Brad's hatred of the world and everyone in it. With a side of Worthy of Trust and Confidence because her Brad voice is just THAT GOOD.

I don't see how there won't be a second set of these at some point.

[jenny-ate-ink]

CW: Sonic Movie 3/Sonic 2024 spoilers

Click away and block the "#sonic movie 3 spoilers" "#sonic movie spoilers" "#sonic 2024 spoilers" and/or "#sonic spoilers" tags if you do not wish to be spoiled

-

Imagine you wake up on a strange new planet, so green, with not a memory of who or what you are. You wake up surrounded by these beings who look nothing like you, and they take you quickly into a metal facility where wires and clips are put on you. Where test after test is run.

They find a power within you. A power they want to channel, to harvest. You make them their power.

But none of them look at you kindly. There is weariness in their eyes. A hesitation in every touch. You are alone. You do not know what you are. Who you are. You have no family. You have no friends.

Then she appears like starlight during a cloudy night. A girl, blond and blue with roller skates. She touches the canister in which you have been placed, and you scowl at her before she scowl at you because everyone scowls at you. Why bother with a smile.

But she mocks you instead with so much humor in her eyes.

It goes all so fast after that. Too fast. You forever look back, wanting, longing. It isn't fair.

She looked at you kindly. She called you her friend. Through her, her grandfather came to like you too.

You would pull her on her skates down the halls and listen to her laugh. You would listen to and sing songs with her. You used to watch movies with her. Shared a pillow fort with her. You once even snuck out to see that green world you landed on again, to stare at the moon and the stars you came from with her. She talked about stars and light lingering on. You looked at her and saw one. Saw your star. Your sun. Your light.

You were happy.

It didn't last. Of course it didn't last. What did you expect? What else did you deserve?

They came for you. For your power. Her grandfather pulled both of you along, running, alarms blaring. She looked so scared.

A gun aimed.

"They're children!"

A gun shoved, a bullet redirected.

An explosion.

You remember it, even now, like it just happened. You relive it every time you close your eyes.

She lies too still on the ground, surrounded by rubble. Broken and burned. You hesitate to touch her, to confirm that this is real. You look up to meet her grandfather's teary eyes. She's gone. Your star is dead.

Your name makes sense now. It suits you well. For you may not have been the one to pull the trigger, but it still was your power that caused the explosion. It was your power that lured them in, your power that killed your star and now leaves the world in shadowed in grief.

You're nothing but a shadow. The darkness in the night. The monster under the bed. Your power killed her, which means you killed her, however indirectly.

She said you aren't a monster and you proved her wrong.

You didn't even fight as they ripped you away from her still warm body. You didn't do anything. You couldn't do anything. You just stared at your hands as they took you away and put you to sleep.

For fifty years you relive it. Over and over again. They made a hell just for you.

They took her from you. Your power, harvested and explosively unleashed, killed her.

You are angry. So angry. It consumes you. It festers like an infection, spreading. It fills you down to the marrows of your bones and pumps through you like blood.

You wake up in a world without her. In a world you don't want to exist. In a world you don't want to exist in.

You go to the only place you think of. The old facility. The only place you ever lived in. The place where she died, where your powers snuffed her out.

You find her grandfather there. He speaks of grief. Of anger. He wants revenge, has a plan of how to get it all laid out, and you are the key to its success.

The world that stole her will burn like she did. Your powers will be harnessed and then explosively unleashed. It will kill you, he tells you. It will kill him. A small price to pay.

It's justice that you die by your own powers, by the same powers that stole her away.

You agree. You want revenge. You want it more than anything. And it the end, you'll be with her again. It's perfect. You want this darken world to feel the same pain it has caused you. You want this pain to end. More than anything, you want to see her again. To feel her light on your fur again.

But a family stands in your way. Something red, something yellow, but mostly something blue. How annoying. How infuriating. They have what you lost, and you want to take it from them. It isn't fair.

You see him. Commander Walters. He was there, he was with them the day she died.

Rage. Deep, sickening rage. You strike him down.

Except... he isn't Walters.

Blue. Eyes carrying the same pain you do glare into your soul.

"What did you do?"

You tell him the truth.

"What I had to."

Revenge awaits.

Is this the right thing to do? Is this what she would've wanted?

No. No. They deserve for taking her. This is revenge. This is what you want... right?

You're so angry. Of course it's what you want. It's what you need.

You power the machine. Let it harvest your power.

You're aren't surprised when blue turned yellow, stronger than ever, comes for you. Of course he would want revenge, too. He is the same as you. He understands your pain. The pain you caused him.

He pins you down. You let him. The world will burn regardless, at least now, you will see her sooner. You can be rid of this pain sooner. You can let him get rid of his pain. You owe him this, don't you? This a mercy upon the both of you.

He hesitates. It angers you. You point to your chest.

"Do it! I'm right here!"

The look in his eyes changes. You no longer see your pain and your rage reflected back at you.

He tells you that revenge doesn't fix anything.

Something shaky within you breaks. You fizzle out. Your anger fizzles out. You realize anger had only ever been the secondary emotion. The mask.

You are consumed with grief. Painful, inescapable grief.

You sit with him and look at the world your powers are going to destroy.

It's blue, like she was. Blue, like he is.

He tells you the pain never goes away, but you learn to grow love around it.

The sun, yellow like her hair, warm as her smile, rises.

It clicks.

You remember it, what she told you all those years ago. How the light still lingers even when the star is gone.

She was, is, your star, and through you her light travels forward even now in her absence.

You are the shadow casted by her lingering light. You are her love preserving. Everything she is, everything she was, you decide now with every action. You are her legacy. Her light still shining.

You were, you are, her shadow. You were always meant to follow her, even now.

You let your anger and grief lead you astray. You should have followed her love from the beginning.

She wouldn't want this.

You wish you could tell her that you're sorry, for everything.

You look at the blue, and he offers his hand.

You take it.

It's time to right your wrongs. To follow the path you were always meant to.

You aren't happy. You're still hurt. And you're still angry, still grieving.

But this feels right.

Even as you redirect the bullet of your power aimed at the Earth, there is a strange peace. A feeling of justice. A knowning that you are doing right by her memory. Acting in her honor rather than your grief.

Blue falters, but you persist. You persevere. You push your mistake further away. You can not, you will not, let your pain hurt anyone else anymore. It isn't what she would've wanted. It isn't what you want. Not anymore.

You can hear her laughter even now. Soft and warm like starlight. You can almost hear her telling you to keep going, to just push it a little further.

Maria.

Is she waiting for you?

Your power engulfs you just like it did to her all those years ago.

Maria.

Is she proud of you?

You close your eyes and welcome it.

Maria.

You'll miss her forever, won't you?