#gelato really is the good shit

[coridallasmultipass]

(This is just an apology I owe someone I will probably never see again. Please ignore, I just needed to get it off my chest 16 years later. I'm not a good person, and I was very cruel as a teen.)

Hi. I'm sorry I wronged you. I treated you terribly when you gave me that letter. It was my fault, obviously. You were such a kind person to me, and we could have been great friends. You shot your shot, and that was totally normal and fair. I just want to explain why I reacted that way, because it was completely uncalled for.

I was living as a girl then, and had no idea that I had this trans man living inside me all along. I didn't know it, but my friendships with men felt so important and validating to me. I felt like I could be one of the bros without realizing that there was an actual personal reason why I needed that validation and mirroring. I guess, at the time, I would have chalked it up to 'daddy issues' from having a continually absent father figure,' which is incredibly reductive and dismissive, and was never genuinely my issue. I felt safe when it was me hanging out with some guys, especially when we often had more interests align which was rare to find in female friends. It's not easy being a kid into metal, alt fashion, art, and nerdy things, when you live in a rural small town where sports is considered the 'ideal' for teens. But you already know that. You lived it, too. You just didn't have the societal pressure to perform femininity, when you're not a girl, on top of it. ((But who knows, you could be a trans woman right now and struggling with your own issues from the other side, I really don't know you.))

But boy, did I PERFORM femininity. The metal scene wasn't the best inspiration for women. You had to be a hot sexy metal babe or you wouldn't get dick. No love for the androgynous women (except lesbians. Go lesbians, I love you.) At least that's what it felt like to 14-year-old me. I had to struggle with the fact that I wanted to look like the band members, not the women they were pictured with. I showed my hairstylist pictures of band men and short-haired Rihanna so I had at least one girl on there. I don't know where I'm going with this. I tried to do both perform the femininity, and doing small things to look more like the band guys I idolized, finding excuses to portray men in acting/roleplay/costumes. 'Because I had a crush on them, right?' No, because I wanted to BE them. Iwanted to be wanted as a man. Not as some metal babe. Being desired as a woman felt horribly invalidating, and I couldn't have ever explained why until now.

It's not a valid excuse, but I reacted that way because I felt safe around you. So safe. You were a dude, my bro, and I could be myself without feeling like I'm being 'tested' for performing human femininity like I did around girls. Like I walk into a room and everyone stops and glares at me. That's what I felt like, that hypervigilance, without knowing what that word meant. You were a good friend, kind, interesting, naturally attractive, and cool. I can't explain it, but it felt like betrayal when you gave me that letter. Suddenly, I was a 'love interest' and not 'fellow bro' and it hurt me so badly to believe that our friendship was built on you viewing me as a girl, not an equal. (That sounds absolutely horrible, I'm not implying that women are 'less," just that it made me feel like I was being unseen, that your feelings were for someone i was not.) I felt like our friendship was built on a lie. I felt disgusted at myself for reasons I didn't understand.

I reacted horribly. I wrote you that shameful e-mail in response. I tried burning that letter because I'm a dramatic hoe, but couldn't get the fireplace open, so I had to blow it out and instead melted and shredded it into the sink disposal. My mom came home and smelled the smoke and thought I was trying a cigarette. (I didn't try a single drug until I had a cigarette in fall of 2017, age 23.) Do we address the situation like an adult with calm words and ponder why we feel all these negative emotions, or do we SINK GO BRRRRRRRR DESTROY THE EVIDENCE?

14-year-old Cori go BRRRRRRRR, apparently.

I mean, I was a KID. Kids are mean as fuck.

It's no excuse, but I can look back on that now and say definitively that it was a result of not understanding my gender identity. I know I'm gay (not to mention, aro), but I did things counter to that, like have a phase of being a lesbian/bi/pan-preferring woman. if being attracted to women made me feel more butch and manly, then 'hey, look at that chick's thighs, bro…' I was gonna play it up.

Anyway, my point, discovering gender was like, literally taking off a suit of armour that never fit right because it was too small for me. I took off that suit of armour at age 19. It felt freeing to have no gender at all. I could do anything I wanted to find what fit me, trying on anything and everything. I finally found that fit in 2015. I'm a dude. This armour fits me perfectly now, and it flexes with my movement. But i still have the chafing and bruises from wearing the wrong armour for so many years.

I should have gently told you that I wanted to stay just friends. Instead, I was spiteful and mean for something that was my own fault. I refused to address my own gender problems, avoiding them entirely and dumping them onto you. I should not have been so immature as to do that and then entirely avoid you forever after.

So, I am deeply and truly sorry. I have regretted it every moment since I clicked 'send.' I hope you've entirely forgotten me by now. I hope you're doing well and still playing music and being your own creative self. I hope you're making mad bucks doing whatever the fuck you love. I'm sorry.

[coquettepascal]

like tiramisu

summary: nothing beats summer vacation like a secret relationship with your dad's best friend, right? wrong! what really beats summer vacation is trying not do jump joel's bones every time you're alone.

tags: 18+, smut, fluff, beach fic, age gap (it's dbf!joel, imagine what you want), dbf!joel, misuse of sunscreen, semi-public activities (not sex), groping, massaging, reader has a dad and brother, overuse of the word pretty, nicknames like pretty___ and baby, oral sex (f!recieving), she/her pronouns for your pussy, joel gets blueballed, fluff, joel and reader are very much in love, established relationship, secret relationship, stereotypical oblivious reader's!dad, mention of food poisoning (nothing graphic), slight grumpy!joel, soft!dom joel (ish)

a/n: woo!! i did it :D this is my submission for @hellishjoel's hot dilf summer challenge (link to the masterlist.) i'm a big fan of their work so i'm just happy to participate. tysm for this opportunity!

(3.6k, not beta read.)

Every year you travel to the coast with your dad and brother, enjoying a week at the tail end of summer to really relax. This year, your brother got sick, and so Joel took his place.

Like Joel, your dad’s best friend. You know, the one that you slept with a month ago one night after everyone went to bed? Joel like kind-of-your-secret-boyfriend-Joel. Simple situation really, you don’t know why you nearly shit yourself when Joel was standing in your driveway dragging a suitcase behind him. 

But, as Joel does, he’s made this easy. It shouldn’t be easy to be separated from him, but it’s made the small moments you can get with him better. Besides, you still get to see him in his handsome glory, all tan and broad and…

The not-easy part is not jumping on him every time your dad turns around. 

—

“Why is this so much more expensive than ice cream?” Joel asks you, eyes squinted as he peers at the chalkboard that hangs above the gelato cooler.

The family in front of you orders and literally pays with a 50 dollar bill, still not getting anywhere near a justifiable amount of change back. Joel squints at the board harder and you smile up at him. He needs glasses, you’ve been telling him this whole trip. 

“Having trouble?” You ask teasingly. Joel’s head turns, face already scowling, but then the employee behind the counter is asking for your order before he can tear you a new one.

Joel is still scowling at you as he shells out 25 dollars for 2 “adult size” cones. 

“S’not necessary to spend this much money on vacation, darlin’, we’re already relaxed,” He grumbles as you walk out of the air conditioned business, back into the beachy heat outside. 

Innocently, you lick up a drip of the tiramisu flavored gelato that drips down the cone. Joel’s eyes narrow more, clearly not appreciative of your behavior so far today. His face eases up when he takes a bite out of his mango sherbet, cooling his flamed temper. 

Your hand snakes into his free one as you walk down the beach, back to where your things are. It’s a quieter day on the beach, luckily. The past week you’ve spent with your father and Joel has been a hectic race for who can find a good spot on the beach, who can find a good spot to sit and eat, and who can find a good spot where the three of you can be left the fuck alone. 

Today you’ve found a good spot, tucked away behind some larger rocks. It kind of looks like it could be dangerous to be there when the tide comes in, but it’s out far today. You’re fine, you’re with Joel, and most importantly, the two of you are alone. 

Your dad ate some bad shrimp last night at dinner and has a horrible case of food poisoning. He assured both of you that he’d be fine on his own, to go enjoy the sun. 

God knows you both will.

You hop over to the blanket you had laid out, cowering under the shade of the rainbow umbrella Joel had bought earlier in the week. He claimed it was so you wouldn’t get heatstroke, but you have a feeling it was more for the sake of his skin. 

As you kick off your sandals, Joel sits down beside you under the umbrella, slurping obnoxiously at the remnants of his mango cone. Most of yours is still intact, though a bit melty. It’s something to marvel at, how Joel can inhale any food of any temperature in the blink of an eye. But it makes up his soft tummy, the one you can rest your head on later when you want to soak up the sun. 

“Do you wanna try mine?” You ask, noting the hungry eyes he’s giving your gelato. He nods and so you lean over to him, extending the cone.

And just as he leans in to take a massive bite, you jerk your hand, smearing tiramisu gelato onto the tip of his nose. 

“Oh my fucking god,” he groans, pulling back, “that’s not fucking funny.” 

But it is funny. Seeing the white cream smudged on his nose, tangled in the bristles of his moustache. You can’t help but laugh at him. 

“That’s what you get for trying to chomp half of my treat!” You point out.

Joel’s head tilts at you, as if to say “really?” 

“Okay fine, I’ll fix it,” you huff. Passing your gelato to your free hand, you lean forward and suck the tip of his nose into your mouth, slurping off the remaining mess. 

Pulling back with a pop, you see Joel’s horrified face. 

“What the fuck is wrong with you?” He groans, wiping your saliva off his face. 

Joel gives you a look, clearly expecting some sort of repayment for the ridiculous stunt you just pulled. Begrudgingly, you hand the rest of your cone to him, but only because you really should put on sunscreen.

��

The sun beats down on you as you lay against Joel’s chest and belly, his legs spread to make room for you. He’s wearing black board shorts that cut off around his mid-thigh, leaving more skin exposed. Joel didn’t wear these ones yesterday, or any day previous. It was just the same red shorts that went down to his knees. But today, he matches you and your black two piece. His thick thighs firmly frame you, keeping you in place. 

“You need to reapply your sunscreen, sweetheart,” Joel hums, blindly pawing the blanket for wherever you tossed the bottle earlier. 

Streams of sunlight bathe you where you sit, the sun no longer blocked by the rainbow umbrella Joel insisted on. You planned on tanning anyways, so you don’t mind as much as Joel seems to. He grabs the sunscreen and his sunglasses, tossing them on. 

Your chin is tucked to your chest, crunched as Joel leans over you more, opening the cap of the lotion. The liquid is so cold in comparison to the warm sun rays that blanket the two of you, a near-pained hiss escaping you.

“Don’t be a baby,” Joel grunts, working the sunscreen into your abdomen.

His hands work your soft flesh so gently, his calloused palms spreading the protective lotion carefully. Joel’s thumbs dig a little harder as he feels your hip bones beneath his hands, making you protest weakly. You know what he’s doing, taking this private opportunity for his own gain.

“Joel,” you warn whinily, squirming. 

His hands grasp you in place, holding you while the cords of muscle on his forearms pop. 

“I said don’t be a baby,” he repeats slower this time, his voice rumbling in your ear.

“We both know you’ve taken worse.”

Yeah. Yeah you do know that. It doesn’t shut you up anymore, whining as he reaches to massage your thighs, his hands slipping to your inner thighs fast. You can barely process his touch there before he’s sliding his hands back to a more appropriate spot, your arms. He’s keeping it PG for the most part at least. The nagging fear of your dad suddenly showing up despite his illness lives in the back of your mind. 

Joel massages your wrists and the palms of your hands, thumbs pushing the flesh soothingly as he murmurs in your ear about how soft you are, how perfect. 

He was keeping it PG, but he’s getting selfish now. The orange sun is painting your skin in a way that’s making it hard for him to think, and it’s been so long since he’s had you alone. Your eyes glaze over as he drips more lotion into his palms, rubbing it between them slowly. 

“Don’t wanna forget your chest, would hate for my pretty girl to burn,” is all the warning you get.

Joel’s arms loop beneath yours, his wet palms sliding up your abdomen and then beneath your swim top. Big hands envelope the starting swell of your breasts, coming upwards and smothering your sensitive skin in sunscreen. His name slips out again, choked and surprised, but this isn’t unwanted.

You miss Joel. Even as he’s been here with you for this whole week, you miss his kisses and his touch. Sleeping in the same room as him, but in separate beds, has been awful. To hear him snore without feeling the vibration of it on your own skin has been treacherous. 

So you’re letting him have this, because as much as you hunger for him, that man is ravenous.

His thumbs rub over your nipples, most of your top bunched up on his knuckles now. Joel’s voice is low in your ears, talking soft like you aren’t in total privacy on the beach. Everything is flying now, his mouth uncontrollable as he tells you how good you feel, how much he missed you. 

“So fuckin’ pretty, all week you’ve been so gorgeous, darlin,’” 

And then the kisses start. Hot down your neck, his scruffy face trails, tongue tracing the bitemarks he leaves occasionally. 

“Joel– Joel no marks,” you remind softly.

He obliges with a grunt, clearly unhappy with the situation. Sometimes he can get away with little marks, ones like on your inner thighs or your tits. But not here on a beach vacation, not so close to your dad. 

Joel continues to kiss you regardless, tilting your head so he can awkwardly meet your lips as he gropes you, massaging the lotion in as if the sun would ever hit any skin below your swimsuit. The atmosphere is only getting hotter as he touches you, the sun blazing against your skin as Joel rolls your nipples between his fingers, making you cry out.

You want more, you need more.

You can feel him hard against you, slightly digging into your back. Sex on the beach is a terrible idea. Public indecency, sand in places it shouldn���t be… but it’s so tempting when you feel how badly he wants you, how badly he missed you. 

Desperately, you turn in his embrace, his hands slipping out of your top, leaving you exposed. You shove your face against his hungrily, feeling as his sunscreen greased hand cups your jaw, gentle even when he’s starving. You open for him easily, letting his hungry tongue taste where he wants. He tastes like waffle cones and tiramisu, you want to lick him clean. You breathe heavily when he slips off your mouth and kisses the side of your face.

“S’a good girl, lettin’ me miss her,” he says into your skin.

Your mouth feels rubbed raw, your nipples are buzzing, and the sun blazes across your back. Everywhere feels warm, his lips, his tongue, your skin, your cunt in these bikini bottoms that stick to you in the worst way. You want Joel’s fingers, spreading you open however he wants. 

Joel is so good at taking care of you, so good that he can hear the rambunctious group of people coming before you can. Hands tug down your top and flip you back around before you can realize.

“You’re alright, s’okay, just some people,” Joel says, sounding anxious himself. 

Just some people. Not anyone you know, just some people.

The two of you quickly switch back to how youwere, your head on his chest while you rest between his thighs. One of his hands rests on your abdomen as he squeezes you affectionately between his legs. It’s really frustrating, watching as the group of people sets up not too far down from the both of you. So much for your private spot on the beach, and potential sex. 

He shifts beneath you, the bulge in his swim shorts uncomfortable. Joel has settled for rubbing his thumb against the smooth skin of your tummy, catching his breath still. 

“You can sleep, baby. Jus’ enjoy the sun, okay?”

The last thing on your mind is sleep, you’re more focused on the conch shell in his pants, but whatever. The sun is warm, and you’re with Joel. His hand stills on your belly, a warm weight in an attempt to soothe you.

-

It works, you fall asleep as the sun sets, and wake up when the cool night air shivers past you. Joel has managed to snake out from under you, using an unused beach towel to make a pillow for you. He’s packed everything up, sans the towel pillow and the blanket you lay on. Everything is ready to go, he’s just been waiting for you.

You watch from where you lay, as he dips his toes in the water. His broad shoulders are covered by a white, linen, shirt, highlighting him across the shore. Something about this is so right, to be on vacation with him, to be taken care of by him. Laying back, eyes staring into the inky night, you wonder what would have happened if the two of you hadn’t stayed up late that night, chatting and flirting. How long would you have gone without feeling loved, and like you belonged? 

Being Joel’s girl is more than that, even if no one knows you’re his, you have come to know yourself through him. His hands brushed away the sands that blurred your eyes, you’re seeing clearly for what feels like the first time ever.

Your love for him crashes down on you hard when he turns, walking back to you with a soft, dorky, smile. That’s your man, that’s your stupid old man, and he loves you.

“You ready t’go, darlin?” Joel asks, clearly relieved you eventually woke up.

With a nod, you walk as a pair back to the hotel. Joel insists on carrying everything, claiming he “don’t need” your help, even as he grunts.

-

Entering  the lobby of the hotel is a reminder that you have to be normal again, you and Joel are just getting along swell, and not seriously infatuated with one another.

His eyes bear into you when you step into the elevator, you can feel his eyes on your back as you press the button for your floor.

“What?” You ask, stepping back to lean against the railing.

Joel’s mouth seems to be dry as he responds, eyes tracing something on your stomach.

“Your tummy,” he manages.

You look down instantly, concerned you’ve managed a sunburn despite Joel’s efforts. Instead though, you find a tan line. A tan line in the shape of Joel’s hand, where it rested as you slept. Ghosts of Joel’s lips and teeth on your neck from earlier murmur across your skin, misting tingles across your shoulders and chest. He wanted to mark you so badly, wanted to sink his teeth into you the way he should have been able to, despite your refusal. Now he has his mark, across your tummy in the shape of his hands, the ones that carefully nurture you. 

You can see how it’s making him tick, how his scruffy jaw is clenched as his eyes are entranced by the shape on your belly. He has to spend the rest of the evening, the last couple of days of this trip, with his mark on you. Joel has to do all of that and not jump onto you at every opportunity he can.

“Baby,” Joel breathes, but the elevator doors open, and your dad is right there.

Your arms instantly wrap around your middle, trying to hide away the Joel-hand shaped tan line. As sick as your dad was this morning, he’s looking miles better. There’s colour in his cheeks, that isn’t green, and he’s standing up.

“Hey kid,” he greets cheerfully, “I’m feelin’ a helluva lot better so I was gonna go out and grab a bite to eat.”

The elevator is so quiet, the doors try to shut and Joel slams a hand against it, to keep it open. Your dad looks a little weirded out, but just smiles. “I’m glad you’re feeling better,” you manage to say, sounding like your lungs have been cut out of your chest.

In the few months that you and Joel have been “together” you haven’t been caught, or even close to being caught. This tan line on your tummy could have been the cat out of the bag, but thankfully your dad seems oblivious.

He steps into the elevator between you two, gently nodding at the elevator doors.

“Y’all gettin’ out? Both of y’look kinda sunfried,” your dad asks.

Joel manages to respond this time as the two of you hurriedly leave the confined space. -

He practically dragged you down the hallway and back to your room once the elevator doors shut, leaving your dad in the dark. Joel dumped all your stuff on the floor near the door, pushing you off him when you tried to kiss at him.

“Naw. Bed,” he had grumbled, making a vague gesture to your bed.

You both knew you had limited time, your dad would be gone for an hour tops. Joel had peeled off his shirt while you shimmied out of what little clothes you had on, your swimsuit coverup falling away easily.

Now, you lay on your back, and if you could look down, you would see the sweat that’s soaking his back and the mess of hair on his head.

But you can’t look down, you can barely move as is. Your legs, which are tossed over his shoulders, shiver, toes curled. You want to ask if he can breathe down there, but your voice keeps catching, repeating his name again and again. The bristles of his facial hair might be chafing, but everything is wet right now, your cunt, his face, your thighs. He’s suffocating in your flesh, opening his mouth to sloppily make out with your pussy, licking at your clit as he sucks it between his lips. It isn’t gentle, he’s fucking famished.

“Joel– Baby, please,” you manage to whimper. 

He probably can’t hear you with the headlock you’ve put him in, soft thighs trapping his ears. Joel’s face slides down further to push his tongue into you, making you clench and gush as his nose presses to your clit. Reaching your hand down, you lace your fingers against his curls, trying to pry him away, but he just won’t quit. Your fingers slip from his sweaty strands, slamming onto the sheets as he doesn’t let up.

“Missed you, missed her,” he rasps between kisses. 

Joel loves this, loves pleasing you. This isn’t submission, this is worship. He talks to your cunt like he knows her, like he’s dating her too. Gentle as he is, he knows where your aches and cricks are, knows how to massage them with his fingers and tongue. Joel takes care of you both, it’s what he lives for. 

“I know, I can feel it, I missed you too,” you babble, hands flagrant between his hair and the sheets.

He laughs softly into you, smiling. You tug him closer, grinding onto his nose as a tease. 

Joel focuses on bringing himself closer, arms snaking up beneath your ass to curl his hands around your thighs, fingers digging in as he pulls you closer. “Been so patient all week, need you t’come for me, please pretty thing?” He groans.

Nodding your head, you start to work with him. Again and again you roll your hips into his face. The two of you are fucking on borrowed time and Joel hastily promises you that he can take care of himself in the shower later, that he just needs to focus on you.

“Just need to taste you, remember your cunt in my mouth, please?” Joel asks.

You nod even faster now, huffing out air as your hips rise and he pulls you closer, tongue and teeth and nose buried in you. Every movement he makes begs for your release, begs for you to give him what he wants. His voice rumbles around your head, a voice encouraging this selfish feeling of pleasure.

“C’mon darlin, I’ve been waitin’ all week to have you. Let go for me, I’ve been patient.”

It sends you over, the mixture of Joel getting pussydrunk on you and the thoughts of him in your head. Your thighs lock around his head even harder, and he powers through without taking a breath for himself. Thoughts of times with him previous flash through your mind as you shiver, thoughts of what he’ll do to you once you’re both home make you gush. He laps it all up, his reward for being patient. 

When he pulls away, your essence is all over his face. Slicked through his facial hair and even on the tip of his nose, like tiramisu gelato. 

Unlike the gelato, you decide not to suck this cream off his nose.

Gently, you swipe a finger over his nose, cleaning it off with your own tongue.

“Thank you, baby,” you hum.

Joel manages to drag himself up your body, caging you beneath him while he smiles. Soft kisses are shared between the two of you, enjoying the peaceful moment where you’re finally, truly, alone. His moustache prickles your upper lip as he smiles and pulls away.

“Can give me your ‘thank you’s’ in a few days time, sweet girl.” He says, pulling himself down to kiss the 5 fingertips of the hand tan line he left.

Looking down at him as he kisses your belly, you hope you'll be exchanging thank you's for a very long time.

[sugdenlovesdingle]

118 group chat (AO3)

---

The thing they don't tell you about being a first responder, Tommy thought, is how much waiting around is involved.

He and Donato had just transported a guy of barely 20 who'd gotten badly injured in a heavy motorcycle accident to hospital, and were waiting around to see if any of the doctors needed to be flown back to the site.

Tommy hadn't seen much from his chopper, but what he had seen hadn't been pretty.

He really hated motorcycles and was still relieved he hadn't personally witnessed Evan getting on one to clear the highway so Athena could land the plane.

A quick search around local news stations after texts from both Evan and Eddie had filled in the blanks for him, but no matter how sexy Evan had looked on the bike, Tommy really hoped it hadn't given his boyfriend the idea of getting one of his own.

"I'm getting a coffee, do you want anything?" Lucy asked, getting up from the seat next to him. "There is no quicker way to make everyone here make up their mind than sitting down with hot coffee."

Tommy chuckled knowing she was right.

"Nah I'm good."

She nodded and went in search for her caffeine boost, leaving Tommy alone with his thoughts and the muted local news playing on the TV on the wall.

Thankfully Evan had the day off so the chances of him appearing on there were slim.

Suddenly he felt his phone buzz against his leg in the pocket of his flight suit.

There was only one person who would text him in the middle of his shift and he smiled as he pulled it out and unlocked it.

Evan ❤️ added you to 118 fam

Evan ❤️: Surprise baby 😘

Hen: You did not just call a grown man baby

Evan ❤️: Why not? It's cute. He's cute!

Hen: 🙄

Hen: Hi @.Tommy by the way.

Eddie: I wish I'd only heard them call each other baby. You're getting way too comfortable around me!

Evan ❤️: Not my fault my boyfriend is so cute and hot and sexy and really good in bed.

Eddie: See???

Evan ❤️: He can sleep for days 😂😉

Howie: Hey look who has finally joined the party! Welcome to the club @.Tommy

Cptn Nash: welcome to the family @.Tommy I hope you can make it to the first 118 dinner in mine and Athena's new place next Sunday.

Eddie: He'll be there cap, Buck will make him.

Evan ❤️: We'll bring dessert. There is an Italian ice cream parlour near Tommy's house. We'll get gelato!

Cptn Nash: Just bring yourselves, that's plenty.

“What's got you smiling like that at your phone? What sappy shit did Buckley say this time?" Lucy asked, coming back with her coffee.

"Nothing you need to know about." Tommy just said, sending a quick "Thanks guys" to the group chat and a ❤️ to Evan and pocketed his phone again when he saw one of the doctors from before make their way over with a heavy bag of medical supplies slung over their shoulder.

"Duty calls" he said to Lucy who swore under her breath and tried to finish her coffee without burning her mouth.

"Every damn time" she muttered but Tommy just laughed and made his way to the elevator up to the helicopter platform, feeling like one of those cartoon characters with the heart eyes floating through air thinking about their love.

Donato would call him a sap if she knew what he was smiling about, but he didn't care. It felt good to belong.

[kenthoescore]

Naughty or Nice? - gojo satoru.

tags. santa!gojo, fingering, extreme teasing, edging, fem!reader

note. this was supposed to be posted on christmas but it got busy, i also gave up at the end whoops

It was Christmas.

it really wasn't the time to be horny, especially with your family around but lo and behold, Gojo fucking Satoru was the epitome of annoying and is (un)fortunately your boyfriend.

Fingers sliding and feeling across the inside of your thigh barely avoiding the lace of your panties hiding underneath the red fabric of your dress as you ate whatever food your family had cooked.

You were grateful that there were linen drapings on the table or else everyone would see how Satoru's touch made you so fucking horny that you could explode.

"You made these just a whole ago, mom?" Satoru asks, eating away at the gelato your mother had made.

Satoru claimed the name 'mom' for your mother when they first met, stating that he'd be calling her that once he pops the magical question of lifetime commitment to him.

"Yes, d'you like it? I remembered you had a sweet tooth and made it at the last minute." Your mother laughed, eyes twinkling in happiness as she stared at him.

jerk.

You screamed in your head as his fingers ever so slightly grazed against your clothed clit. He chuckled in response to your mother, replying in a overly-sweet tone.

"Thanks, Mom." He giggled.

You shot him a glare but it immediately faltered as his fingers hastily pushed your panties to the side, tickling your entrance with his middle.

You inhlaed sharply at the time one of your family members talked to you, Satoru decided to push a long finger in. Immediately pushing against the soft spot deep inside you.

It went like that throughout dinner.

His fingers slipping in and pressing down on your sweet spot as you tried to talk, or circle harshly on your clit as you tried to eat.

All while his face remained unchanged, except for the teasing winks or the shit-eating grin on his face whenever he looked in your direction.

"Satoru, why don't you play Santa?"

You burst in laughter, at the same time his fingers froze on your pussy. One of your younger cousins had asked him that.

"Oh, you would play a great santa, toru."

You teased finally getting back at him. He shot you an overdramatic look of disagreement.

"No, no. I can't!" He replied, his voice taking a notch up higher, although his grin was still there, falrering a little bit, "do I look like Santa to you? I don't have a big stomach and I'm not old."

He pouts, refusing to play Santa. Slightly offended that he was offered to play santa.

"Oh, c'mon. Aren't you good at deciding who's naughty or nice?"

You don't know how.

But you know for sure that you're fucked.

You found yourself standing in front of Satoru, watching him in his red attire, a white beard on his face now as he cosplayed Santa.

You would laugh, but you feared a moan would slip out of you instead as you felt the consistent buzzing of the vibrator in your cunt.

Satoru had pulled you in your childhood bedroom, making up a solid excuse of helping him get into his costume.

"C'mere princess, need to slut you out while your family's watching." He grinned, pushing the dress up your thighs.

"Already so wet f'me... too bad you'd have to wait 'till they're all asleep." He chuckled again, kissing your neck as he walked behind you.

Deliberately making you feel his hardened cock through his pants, pressing them up your ass. He pushed your panties to the side again, almost maddeningly slow before gently sliding in the vibrator and snapping your panties back in place.

You jolt at the sudden impact, the fabring colliding sharply against your cunt.

"Be a good lil girl for me, yeah? I get to decide who's naughty or nice anyways." He whispered, grabbing a hold of your hips, pulling your ass against his bulge.

He moans so softly in your ear, teasingly.

Making you feel sparks of pleasure shoot through your cunt. His moans were always the perfect mixture of whiny and rough.

The evening continued like that. He would randomly spike the vibrations to the max, making you whimper pathetically under your breath. Your juices gushing out more and more, soiling your panties.

He would turn it back to the lowest fucking setting just to spite you, just to deny you your pleasure, just to edge you and keep you frustrated.

It was driving you mad.

All you could think about was the way his cock would deliciously melt your frustrations away, the way his cock would rub and fuck all the right spots so easily.

And so mercilessly.

All while moaning without inhibitions, Satoru wasn't afraid to let you hear how good he was feeling. And you fucking liked it to the core.

The way you knew your white-haired boyfriend would absolutely wreck your pussy, leaving you shaking until your hole would gape once he's finished, and a thick ooze of his pearly white cum would–

"Baby... it's your turn." Satoru called out, snapping you out of your erotic daydream.

Your cheeks flush a crimson red as you realized your family was looking back at you, you felt like they read every single thing that had crossed your mind a second ago.

"Uh, yeah. Right." You cleared your throat, trying to act composed as if the vibe didn't go to the maximum pulse again.

You shot Satoru a glare as you walked towards the Christmas tree, where Satoru was also standing next to. Which he replied with his signature smirk.

You picked up the gifts that was labelled your name, one from your dad, your mom, your siblings, and from Satoru himself.

You gave them all a grateful smile, your frustration slightly melting away as you let your eye's meet your boyfriend's striking blue ones.

He smiled, genuinely smiled at you. His teeth showing, there was always a hint of tease and cockiness despite how he smiled but you were used to it. It didn't make his emotions and feelings any less truer.

The vibrator against your clit was excruciatingly pleasurable but Satoru won't let you cum. You had to wait, wait until the night is over.

"Don't cum yet, you don't want to be naughty for me, yeah?"

Satoru whispered, seating himself beside you as your family unwrapped their gifts. His hand sneakily dances along your ass, hinting at the punishment you would recieve if you didn't comply.

You were in for a long night.

[berylcups]

PT 2-How La Squadra react to you calling them their nickname/term of endearment:

CW: mentions of polyamory and queer relationship discrimination

Notes: Here's part 2! This was actually pretty fun! If anyone has similar HCs/reacts they would like please send them in! It was refreshing to do something fluffy-ish rather than just lewd for once! I’m still working on Sorbet and Gelatos personalities so I hope they don’t seem too generic or stereotypical, but theres not much of them to work off of…other than them screaming and dying. Yikes. But I hope you all enjoy! 💜Beryl

Risotto: “Rissi, I’m heading to the grocery store.” You announced turning the knob to his office. “ is there anything special you want for dinner tonig-oh shit” you saw he wasn’t alone. Prosciutto and Pesci were in the room with him talking about some target.

“I’m so sorry- I didn’t know you were busy- I’ll come back later.”

Prosciutto cleared his throat upon hearing that cutesy name and Pesci looked away trying to hide his blush.

“We can touch base on further details later. This should be enough to get started with.” He dismissed them, acting unaffected by the name.

They promptly took their leave, just leaving you and your beloved leader alone.

“I’m so sorry, Risotto. I didn’t know you were busy. I should’ve known bette-“ you stuttered worried you embarrassed him.

“It’s fine.” He cut you off. “It’s just the guys. They know better than to mess with me about the names you call me.” He chuckled. 

“Although for future reference…” he started looking up at you with a serious expression. “This might be a habit you should break. If any of our enemies know we are connected, they might try to harm you and I just couldn’t live with myself knowing I caused your demise.” He said. “I already lost one too many people dear to me.”

You walked over to him by the desk and gave him a huge hug. “I’m not going anywhere. I promise you that.” He hugged back and gave you a soft kiss on the shell of your ear. 

“Good. Because the day you die is the day I die. I love you Angelo/a.” He sighed in relief. 

This big guy has to be stoic 24/7 so in front of others he’s going to keep things professional. As far as he cares in front of the guys you can call him all the names you want but he isn’t going to acknowledge them 😂 call him zaddy and he’ll just continue talking about what mission is next… or if you’re overdoing it he’ll give you a warning “ok, that’s enough.” type of look. 

Of course in private he’ll call you pet names but… he’s not very creative but he’s dramatic so he’ll call you the vita mia, cuore mio, caro/a, and angelo/a. 

Prosciutto: “Prosci I’m back! The mission was a success! It’s all thanks to you that I’m able to work by myself now!” You said happily as you came through the door. 

“Prosci??? Pfft” formaggio snickered. 

A few of the others were snickering or trying to hold back a smile. Prosciutto put an end to this quickly with a deadly glare. 

“Really? That’s wonderful news Y/N. I’m very proud of you.” He said as he guided you to somewhere a little more private.

“Y/N… I love you with all my heart but remember what we agreed upon?” He asked. “We must keep our affections private.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, Prosciutto. I must have really embarrassed you.” You said dejectedly looking away from him.

“No. Never.” He said firmly as he gently lifted your face to meet his. He gently bumped his forehead up against yours. 

“You are my beloved partner and I love you no matter what. But in this world we must remain distant in front of others so I can protect you.” He explained gently caressing your face . 

“Also… we have to set a good example for Pesci. He may be a mammoni but he has so much potential and it’s up to us to help him unlock it. Understand?”

“Understand.” You said with a small smile.

“That’s my good angelo/a.” He smiled back and kissed you on the forehead. 

He’s not very affectionate in public but he is chivalrous. He’ll open the door for you, pour your wine, take your jacket, etc… 

In private he’ll call you his favorite pet names with a kiss on the cheek.

He’ll use the classic names like Tesoro, Caro/a, Bambino/a, or calls you his angelo/a. 😇

Sorbet & Gelato:  “Sorby Gelly I’m upset!” You whined.

“Aww what’s wrong lil sundae?” Asked Gelato.

“You know the drill-come sit down and tell us what’s wrong.” Added Sorbet patting Gelatos lap.

You moped over and somehow found your spot in the dog pile of legs and laps on the chair.

“You know Valentines is next month and I saw this cool fancy spa I wanted us to go to-“ you started with putting the magazine page in their faces. “Seeee??? But they are all TwO pEoPlE oNlY!!! This is unfair! They act like the entire world is monogamous and straight! Bullshit!” you complained.

“Oh, that does look nice. I could use a massage, my back has been killing me lately.” Sorbet read through the page.

“Mud baths and facials too? I’m in.” Gelato looked at the pictures.

“But what about the restrictions?” you asked.

“Oh Y/N. Do you have any idea who you’re in a relationship with? We’ll get you that perfect valentine's day, whether they want to serve 3 people or not.” Gelato cooed, patting your head to comfort you.

“Of course they’ll take care of us…if they wanna live that is.” Sorbet added rubbing your back. “Or we could show them our knife collection instead. Their choice.”

“Yay~! I can’t wait! I’ll be sure to add a reminder to my calendar to make a reservation for later.” you said gleefully.

“Anything to keep our little sundae happy~.” they both said in unison and kissed you on both sides of your cheeks.

“...” Illuso gulped trying to hold back the bile rising in his throat. The PDA is just overwhelming!

The other men in the room wanted to throw up from the mushiness. It's gotten worse ever since they added you into their relationship but they know better than to say anything after Illuso made fun of you three and ended up with a knife in his thigh. 

Sorbet and Gelato are the kings of PDA! They are always cuddled up on one another and now you’re included on the love fest. They are gonna sit on your lap, you're gonna sit in their lap, you're gonna sit on one's lap while the other sits on your lap, etc. And they’re generous with the pet names as well!

They both like names that match up with their names, so you get named after frozen treats like Sundae, Granita, Sherbet, Snowcone…along with the typical names like caro/a, tersoro, and amore too. They have a long list of names to call you, so it doesn’t simply end there!

[baby-tini]

Do you think Mikey [all timelines] smoke weed?

Uhm.. fucking yes. CW- weed, smut Toman\OG Timeline- I feel like OG Mikey has smoked weed a couple times in his life, I definitely think he's a cougher though, no matter how much he smokes. THIS MAN WILL COUGH UP HIS LUNGS. He doesn't like it too much either, he doesn't like not being in control of his body and he HATES the smell. If you want him too smoke with you... you better find some that isn't super strong or potent in smell, like blue mystic, durban poison or northern lights. Also he hates cotton mouth and gets BAD munchies. Manila- Yeess. This man smokes. He smokes quite a bit too, he loves sativa and anything fruity like, purple punch strain, blue gelato 41, he likes blackberry too but only on occasion, he's quite picky when it comes to taste. He doesn't really cough a lot, sometimes on the first hit he may but that's it, he can hold it for a bit too. PLUS, this man can fucking roll, so good too and he can make the 'o's. He loves doing shotguns, specifically when he has smoke in his mouth and you french kiss him, he'll hold you to him by the back of your neck so that you hold it longer. Also he is the BIGGEST fan of high sex, he's a lot rougher and more intense when having sex while high. Folding your legs and pushing them towards your stomach as he fucks you, hand wrapped around your throat as he growls in your ear. Best sex you'll ever have in your life. Guarantied. Kanto- He did it once but besides that, no, he doesn't smoke weed, I genuinely believe that he dislikes everything about it. He hates the smell, the taste, the cottonmouth, the munchies and that the smell sticks to his clothes. He's also not a fan of the red eyes that he gets from smoking, also he's always busy and he needs to be fully concentrated on running Kanto, he can't really do that with his head all foggy. The one time he did smoke though, he was staring off into space for hours, he was completely out of it. Bonten- He's tried it, but he does harder shit, so, weed is rarely his go to. He only smokes when he wants too relax and chill. I do, however, fully believe that he's the sleepy type, he smokes a blunt and he's out an hour later. He rarely gets cottonmouth and the munchies aren't very frequent for him, also, he never coughs. He does however, become very deep when he smokes. He has the deepest conversations, asking you about your dreams and inspiration as he brushes his fingers through your hair. He definitely does become more affectionate while high. Kissing you non-stop as he nuzzles into your hair and breathes you in. Street racer- He does, not as much as Manila Mikey does, but it's still pretty often. I will say however, he's a very messy roller and some of it falls out from the paper. So, don't let him roll if you wish too smoke a whole blunt and not just less then half. He definitely fucks with indica strains and hybrids. He's a cougher, not as much as OG Mikey, but he still coughs. This man always gets munchies, it's inevitable, so if you're gonna smoke with him, MAKE SNACKS/HAVE THEM PREPARED BEFORE-HAND. He likes too exhale it out of his nose.. only to sneeze multiple times, seconds later. He's so fucking clingy when high, you can't leave. so if you gotta piss, do it before or you're not gonna do it at all. This Mikey is also a fan of high sex, but he likes it and is, very lazy. Commonaly, he'll be fucking into you while you're on your side, a hand between your legs rubbing your clit as he whines and pants in your ear.

[annachum]

Angel Dust and Husk's first date

. A month after Loser Baby, Husk and Angel are just chit chatting at the bar late at night, when Husk said, ' Hey, uh....you free tomorrow night? '

Angel : * heart drops, knowing where this is going * I'm off tomorrow all day....why?

Husk : I'd like to take you to this fancy Italian restaurant down the street tomorrow night. Food and drink on me....if that's what you like.

Angel : Are you.....are you asking me on a date, Husky? * heart eyes *

Husk : Well, yeah, I mean, for the past 4 months we met, I came to.....* face blushes * Fuck, I really like ya a lot, kid, okay? And you deserved to be treated real nice -

Angel : * kisses Husk on rhe nose * Pick me at 6pm, handsome. And don't be late. * Saunters off * I'll see ya tomorrow night, Husky Poo.

Husk : Night, Tony. * once he left * ( grumbles ) Ughhhh, WHY have I become such a sap.

. Later in Angel's room

Angel Dust : * on the phone with Cherri * CHERRI, WE ARE SO GONNA SHOP AT THE SIN CITY MALL FIRST THING TOMORROW MORNING. ADDING A SPA TOO.

Cherri : Why? What's the event?

Angel : HUSKY JUST ASKED ME OUT!!!

Cherri and Angel : * excited screaming *

. The next day at morning Cherri and Angel meet up at a SIN City Cafe for a pancake breakfast before going on a full day shopping and spa spree

. Cherri being a good sister figure helped Angel pick out a best date night outfit possible

. After lunch at a salad place, they treated themselves to a spa afternoon before heading back to Angel's room for a date night

. Later that evening, with Husk in a fancy black and gold suit waiting for Angel, he looked up and jaws hit the floor at Angel sauntering down the stairs to Jessica Rabbit's theme ( he played the music ) in a scintillating fuschia backless dress, white gloves and black boots, with pearls head to toe.

. Husk : Woah.....* hands Angel a bouquet of pink roses he picked out from Rosie's Emporium with some help from Alastor, Rosie and Nifty, who practically frogmarched Husk to Cannibal Town for a date night fit and such earlier that day * You look beautiful, Tony. * kisses Angel's hand *

Angel : * blushes * Awwww. What a gentleman. Shall we go?

Husk : Mmhmm. * offers a hand, to which Angel intertwines it *

. La Gondolia was one of the swankiest Italian joints in Pentagram City, and when Angel and Husk showed up there by Charlie's red limo, the ambience of the restaurant, combined with a live jazz band and fancy waiters serving up silver trays of food, instantly gave Angel flashbacks of the fancy eating outs he had with his parents and siblings growing up

. They got themselves a reserved table, and they thoroughly enjoyed a 4 course meal while sipping wine

. The wine made both of them losen up their nerves. Soon, they started exchanging inside jokes in Italian

. They ordered a 4 course set which consists of shrimp and cherry tomato bruschetta with green goddess soup, mozzarella ravioli in pumpkin sauce for Angel and spinach lasagna for Husk, and then Bistecca alla Fiorentina for both, and milk Gelato with honey and olive oil for desert

. And then before desert, Husk led Angel Dust to the dance floor and they did a romantic slow dance to the live band's cover of ' Something Stupid '

. Eventually, Husk footed the whole bill ( even tho Angel never asked of it ), to which Angel is impressed by the gallant gesture

. After the dinner

Angel : I really enjoyed the date, Husky....thanks. * smiles *

Husk : * smiles tenderly * Glad you enjoyed it, kid. Charlie ain't wrong when she recommended me this place.

The rain starts to pour

Angel : Shit, I forgot my umbrella. The weather forecast didn't really say there is gonna be rain....

Husk : Don't worry, Tony. I got us an umbrella at the limo. So it should come around any minute now. * pause * Can I....uh....kiss you while we are waiting for the limo?

Angel : Oh, suga, * bats eyelashes * You already have me at hello

. Husk wraps his strong arms around Angel, flapped his wings a bit higher to his height...and slowly, tenderly pressed his lips to Angel's

. The first kiss feels like a wonderful somersault, as tongues began battling for dominance. Things are starting to get a bot heated when the limo arrived

. Husk : Oh, great, limo's here.

Angel : * chuckles * Wanna continue at the back?

Husk : * laughs * Lemme get the umbrella, baby. * scoots in the limo, comes out with a spare umbrella, then takes off his tuxedo coat and wrap it around Angel as he escorted Angel back in *

. Once in there, the 2 began making out and cuddling tenderly to soft romantic music as the rain poured outside

. Once back at the Hotel, Angel Dust and Husk are laughing and talking as Husk escorted Angel back to his room

. Angel grabbed Husk by the collar and kissed him passionately, and with a big grin, he grooned, ' Buona noche, kitty. ' And wjth a wink, he goes back to his room

. Husk was in a daze as he sauntered back to his room, humming Singing in the Rain to himself

. Next day at breakfast all their friends are so happy when Husk and Angel announced they are an item!!

🤩🤩🤩🥺

[oddverse]

PROSCIUTTO friendship ranking. Because why not?

Pesci. Usually this would be self explanatory but like. Pesci is like the one person on the team who actually respects him as a leader and who values his time. They do hang out together.

Risotto. Old bonds die hard. I KNOW they had the craziest breakup ever back in 98. They’re still good friends, even if neither of them act that affectionate to the other. Only other person Prosciutto feels “really gets him” on the team.

Melone. Definitely more on Melone’s side. He’ll try to strike up a conversation about whatever article he read recently about flies or dna or how the sun moves and Prosciutto says “uh-huh” while desperately wishing his cig was longer. They’ve tried hanging out once. Both wanna do it again

Sorbet. He’s more on Pro’s wavelength when it comes to missions. They were partners before Pesci came along, and they’re damn good at it. They don’t talk much outside of work though.

Gelato. Opposite issue. They talk a lot outside of work but Prosciutto just cannot wrap his head around Gelato. He’s the one man who’s never backed down from challenging him.

Ghiaccio. They just don’t talk. It’s nothing personal, Ghiaccio just dicks around a little too much for his liking.

Illuso. Dear god he hates him and his stupid stand. He HATES getting spied on and jabbed at for shit he did in private.

Formaggio. This lazy ass who doesn’t give a shit about fuck who keeps winning their soccer bets who hardly does his own work makes him so pissed. The worst part is Formaggio doesn’t even care that much about what he thinks which drives him mad

aaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAGH i really love this one, i cant even add my own because its so close to his character, the only difference is that i really love the idea of Gelato being one of the Squadras first babysitters, hes got the "best judgement" of them and it makes my heart tight to think of Prosciutto adoring him as a mentor or even a,,,, fratello,,,

[xixovart]

whats up guys its mali and im back with more pjo headcanons

because i literally nEVER shut up

nico di angelo is bae and i would die for him

ok i know his hair is described as like shoulder length (i think idk) but we HAVE to consider nico with unbelievably long gorgeous hair i beg

estelle’s brother. no questions asked. i feel like nico and estelle would be a power duo to rival annabeth and thalia yeah i said it. percy says estelle cant have candy at night? nico sneaks a tootsie roll in her pillow case. nico helps her with her homework. nico fights her bullies. nico’s relationship with estelle is what a 10 y/o nico’s relationship could’ve been with percy. ykwim?  wine aunts nico and reyna we have to consider this

ok as a sequel nico is really good with kids. idk why. no one knows why. kids love him.

will has the absolute WORST sense of style mankind has ever bore witness to and nico is an unintentional fashion icon. nico genuinely doesn't care that his bf looks like a bad teen beach movie adaptation though it's ok.

youre lying to yourself if you think nico di freaking angelo wouldnt love dinosaurs as a kid

this child was the bane of maria di angelo’s existence. i swear. imagine maria fighting for her LIFE trying to give 3 year old nico a bath just for nico to IMMEDIATELY run outside and fall face first in the mud. imagine nico stealing money from maria and accidentally giving the gelato man a hundred bucks, maria being none the wiser. if you've ever watched full house toddler nico is very michelle coded.

i know its canon that he likes marvel (thx will kayla and austin) but i think he would REALLY love batman. i mean c'mon, it's nico. it's batman. they're soulmates. 

percy going into the redesigned cabin 13 for the first time have we considered his reaction?? “dang btch you live like this???” “what were you expecting” “idk weapons everywhere rock walls a waterfall for a door ig i was just picturing the batcave 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️”

I JUST REMEMBERED THAT NICO GOES TO PERSEPHONE’S GARDEN AND THAT ITS ONE OF HIS FAVORITE PLACES AND LIFE IS GOOD AGAIN.

nico is the modt sarcastic little gremlin to his dad (and everyone, but his dad especially). are uou seriously telling me he wouldn't annoy hades on purpose. let's be real here guys. nico prank calling his dad is the reason im alive. 

“is your… refrigerator running?”

“nico do not fucking start with me i have a headache”

“oh yeah i'm listening to really cool rock metal cool music rn totally” (old italian music blasting from his headphones)

this kid has a guy for EVERY occasion. imagine rhe weirdest situation you could possibly be in, nico knows a guy. “ok where are we gonna find a tap dancing elephant??” “i know a guy”

when he eats ambrosia it tastes like the blue birthday cake he shared with percy im not ok

“so we’re all 16 and none of us knows how to drive??” “i can get us there” “nico you’re like 13 years old.” “and european?? hand me the keys”

ok so you can expect he has unbelievably beautiful penmanship because he was raised in 1930’s italy and you are so right. looking at his writing is like a blessing 

im listening to a pearl by mitski rn and it reminds me of him im so sad

side note i think he would really like mitski

he seems like he would be afraid of clowns. don't ask about my thought process for this i just feel it ykwim

nico would get his shit ROCKED by a nerf gun

“wHY IS THE MICROWAVE SCREAMING AT ME” “nico that just means your food is done.”

i will NEVER shut up about nico di angelo’s accent. rolled r’s, hard i’s, speaking unbelievably fast and tripping over his words. italian!! “oh but mali, in house of hades the seven were surprised to learn nico was italian.'' first of all i love the seven but its rlly dumb of them not to notice nico was italian when his last name is DI ANGELO. second. a certain 11 year old nico trained himself out of his accent as a method for escapism, he wanted to flee his past and his family and his descent, and he wanted to fit in. of course he would hide his accent. his time at camp half blood (and ofc his quest with reyna, and jason’s acceptance of him) helped him start to embrace his heritage and past. when he started dating will, he ofc began to trust will more than anybody else. every so often, nico would let his guard down and let his accent slip. eventually, he started using it freely around everybody. i see this hc as a part of his growth and character development and even if it’s a small detail it means a lot to me.

he takes his curly hair routine VERY seriously

bushy eyebrows idk where this came fr9m just bear with me

nico uses disassociation as a coping mechanism a LOT. he’ll zone out at random for hours at a time and chb has a very strict rule about not bothering campers with ptsd when they’re disassociated unless necessary, so he’ll just sit at the dinner table for ages and when he comes back to reality it’s been like 3 hours. 

 “you came out of the blue like that. i never could've seen you coming, i think you're everything i wanted.” by gracie abrams except it’s nico realizing he likes will 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

[radiant-reid]

Oooh! Can we get a blurb on this?

I need to visualize this for my daily scenarios

Yup !! I got three requests for this omg

Spencer’s the only boyfriend you’ve ever had who has volunteered to come clothing shopping, knowing there’s nothing at the mall he wants to buy or look at. He’s not like the other boyfriends standing outside stores looking at their phones, texting their girlfriends to hurry up.

No, Spencer is all in with you, and you’re grateful for it. He has an eye for patterns that’ll look good on you and he’s very attentive.

It seems like the perfect afternoon together, until he notices a dress you’ve picked up, interested in trying on. “You’ll need a bigger size than that.” He tells you. “At least one size bigger, but I can go and grab both one size bigger and two sizes bigger.”

His offer seems helpful and his eyes are caring but you’re heartbroken. Totally heartbroken.

It breaks your heart before you can tell yourself it’s silly, that he didn’t mean it as a criticism because he probably didn’t, he’s sweet Spencer. But it hurts deep down.

It’s not the appropriate thing to say and the connotations are a total whiplash to the sweet compliments he was giving you a minute ago.

Spencer doesn’t notice what he’s said, going back to sifting through another rack of dresses while you stand there paralyzed.

But you can’t bare to witness him hand you something to try on two sizes bigger than you expect it so you shallowly speak up. “I think I’m done.”

He’s taken off guard by your sharpness and sudden lack of enthusiasm, but he agrees nonetheless. “Okay… do you still want to get gelato on the way out?”

You shake your head firmly. “No, I don’t want any of that.”

He knows something is wrong then, but he doesn’t know if it was even him. It could have been a text you got that upset you, so you go home without a word of protest from him.

You’re not the same that night, he notices. You barely seem interested in having him at your apartment, not even starting on the fashion show you promised to give where you showed him the right tops that would work with your new jeans.

“What happened?” He asks, looking at you with worry as his deductions come together. Well, half come together. “I messed up somehow and I’m really sorry because I am trying to be the perfect boyfriend.”

You know that, and you can’t ignore how perfect he’s been so far so you nod, agreeing to yourself to be honest with him. “What you said about me needing a bigger size kind of hurt.”

It takes a moment for it to compute in his brain but you notice when it does because his eyes cloud with tears. “Y/n, no I didn’t mean it like that.” He frantically promises. “I was just trying to be helpful and it was so dumb and I’m so sorry.”

You shake your head, not wanting him to be as upset as he looks. “It’s alright.”

“It’s not.” He argues. “I’m so used to profiling people I didn’t see how that could be hurtful and for that I’m very sorry.”

You nod. “Thank you. I know it wasn’t meant to be critical.”

“But it felt like that in the moment.” He adds, exactly what you’re thinking. “Shit, sorry I shouldn’t have done that.”

You grab his hands in yours, holding them firmly. “Spence, I love how observed you are, please don’t stop doing that. Just maybe no comments besides compliments about how I look.”

He quickly nods, eager to please. “I promise. You’re the most gorgeous person I’ve ever met, you know?” He asks you.

That’s the Spencer observations you’re used to having and you grin. “Thank you.”

[cobaltcarbonpotassium420]

lemon sorbet - gojo satoru

content: 1.4k words, gn!reader, can be read as platonic or romantic, wrote this with teenage gojo in mind, gojo is an annoying little shit

author's note: it has been so long!! uni has kept me dead, and the summer weather has continued to keep me dead :/ anyway out of annoyance at the heat and my burning desire for lemon sorbet, i figured i'd write this. also i somehow have a cold... in july... and the boredom is turning my brain to mush so apols for a slightly shite fic, i just needed something to do :p

"is it possible to sweat from the bottom of your feet?" "how would i know? i don't know shit about biology."

the summer heat had never felt so stifling before. in fact, even this wasn't an appropriate way to explain the weather. the heat was suffocating. not a single breeze passed through the town, fans and air conditioning were rendered useless, and even going down to the river in the shade of the trees did nothing since the stones by the riverside had absorbed all of the heat from the summer sun and were probably hot enough to grill food on. as the saying goes though, all clouds have a silver lining. in this case, the silver lining wasn't cute summery outfits, or beach days with friends, or whatever else typical july days offered. instead, the oppressive heat finally gave you an excuse to hang out with the ordinarily (and at times inappropriately) adventurous and spontaneous gojo satoru while doing nothing.

"freezing cubes of tea so the tea doesn't get diluted when the ice melts? that's genius! where did you learn about this?" "uh, the internet? it's kind of an open secret."

on any average day, gojo would have dragged you out to a cafe on the other side of town but even he had no energy left after the heat made it all evaporate from his body. as such, he had no choice but to lay on the cold wooden floor in your room so he could have at least some company. your laptop was in front of you, open to the last page of the dozen tabs you had been scrolling through in your boredom before giving up and deciding to just press your face to the floor in a futile effort to cool down a little more. just next to you gojo was aimlessly flicking through a pile of books, manga, and magazines which he had grabbed from various places around your room. currently, he was skimming the pages of a week-old local newspaper that was on the pile of mail you needed to bin.

"strips in a club, five letters? dollar doesn't fit… maybe paper?"

his questions had started to become a little annoying, but it beat staring under the furniture and wondering how long it had been since you'd moved it out of the way and mopped the floor under it.

"it's bacon. the clue means 'club' as in a 'club sandwich'. they've used that clue before, editor must be getting lazy. maybe they've recycled the whole crossword." "you really think so? okay then, what about poker term, or a mount when read backwards? four letters." "ante. yeah they definitely did this one a while back, sometime late last year i think. i remember solving that clue and thinking how nice it would be to go to italy. maybe try some authentic gelato."

gojo immediately perked up. his previous position had made you wonder for a second if it was possible for a person to melt, but now all of his energy had seemed to be restored in merely the blink of an eye.

"oh that sounds like a good idea! we could go do that now!" "do what, go to italy? for starters, i absolutely don't have the money for a plane ticket. and anyway, if it's so scorching hot here then just imagine how hot italy would be. we're barely hanging on by a thread here, i think we might actually die if we go to italy." gojo's energy was normally infectious, but somewhere between the temperature and humidity it got misdirected and just couldn't reach you.

"nonono, although if you really want to go i'll just pay for the flight." "absolutely not." "fine. but italy wasn't what i meant. i meant we could go get some ice cream from the train station! you know that's where the best ice cream is." "that's a lovely idea and all, but how are we meant to get there? not like we have a car, there's no buses in that direction, and getting a taxi just to the train station seems a little excessive. and they're shit expensive." "we have legs!"

upon hearing those three words, your body finally granted you enough energy to lift yourself up, even if just to support yourself on your elbows for long enough so you could stare gojo right in the eyes before giving him a definitive "fuck no." and slumping back down on the floor.

gojo wasn't one to give up on an idea so quickly though, and upon seeing him sit up and drag himself closer to you so he could try to annoy you into giving in, you simply prayed that there was a benevolent deity which would take pity on you in this state and let this whole ordeal blow over quickly. unfortunately, even the gods were tired from the heat today, and so the discussion had to be dragged out for much longer than you wanted it to.

"please?" "no." "pretty please?" "no." "pretty pretty please?" "no." "pretty pretty please with a cherry on top?" "like the cherry on top of an ice cream sundae?" "yes!" "still no!" "argh! you never want to do anything fun!"

gojo threw himself on top of you, and from his voice you could hear his pout, both actions which you were sure were worthy of an acting accolade, but by this point the heat had exhausted you completely and your eyes were closed which was the only surefire defence against gojo's theatricality.

a few moments passed with neither of you making a move. nothing was said, but you knew gojo's actions were childishly telling you that unless you agreed to his stupid plan then there was no way he was moving.

"if we go then it's my treat, y'know, since i dragged you all the way there."

no response. gojo started drumming his fingers on the floor, thinking up his next course of action, and then his phone screen lit up with a text from geto and presented him with the perfect plan.

"they have lemon sorbet today! i know you love that." he dragged out the word "love" for far too long. he could never understand why that flavour was among your favourites, and ever since he found out he teased you for it constantly. out of all of the delicious, mouthwatering flavours that you could choose from, you chose the most vile, sour flavour nine times out of ten.

"they have lemon sorbet every day." "yeah, but geto just texted me. he said that it's just flying out of the shop today, and they're down to their last two containers."

now this had the potential to change your mind. your interest was piqued, and gojo could see how your facial expression subtly changed from where he was sat.

"you know, they only get deliveries twice a week, and today was their delivery day. that means you'll have to wait at least three whole days until the next time you can savour the taste of their refreshing lemon sorbet." gojo spoke slowly, even more so on those last three words. the gentle lilt of his voice was starting to sound nice, almost as nice as the sorbet he was talking about.

"three whole days?" "yeah, or maybe even longer. you know lemon sorbet is gonna be flying off the shelves right now, and i doubt a tiny ice cream place in the middle of nowhere will be at the top of the suppliers list."

at some point during gojo's very convincing speech, you had sat up without realising it. the gravity of the situation suddenly fell upon you. lemon sorbet was indeed very popular, and the supplier's priority would probably be larger cities with lots of customers.

"you might be right… and the sorbet they sell at the store isn't that good…"

a twinkle appeared in gojo's eyes. he knew he was close. he could practically taste the chocolate chip cookie ice cream he'd get.

"if you want, we can take a tub as well, and ask for a few scoops to take home too."

a moment passed. and then another. gojo scrutinised your facial expression. he watched the way you stared ahead at the wall, and the way your eyebrows slightly furrowed together. you licked your lips ever so slightly, and then took a deep breath.

"fine. we can go." "oh hell yeah!" "you're paying though." "you know what, i'm not feeling it anymore."

[ri-badguypilot]

you know that really cute but kinda scary-faced sankta that's been walking around lately? the one that keeps trying to set landmines on the deck while the Doc is napping?

ambriel told me he bought and ate 100 scoops of gelato because it was his coworker's dying wish

Hoooooly shit. Where do I start unpacking this one. Okay, uh

Being cute is SO low on the scale of things that you need to know about this guy. Do not, and I stress, ever ask him out. If management sees you on "good terms" with him you're going to get partnered up on the next mission, and nobody likes that.

I once saw him put down his shotguns and punch a reinforced door so hard it exploded. No shrapnel protection no gloves no nothing. Ask the guy who saw him rip apart a beast with his bare hands, also.

I think property damage is his special interest. The Doctor hasn't died yet so I'm assuming they let him do that as some kind of enrichment.

You may be thinking that the ice cream thing is a lie, but 4a. Being an executor is a very serious job with high levels of commitment and 4b. I think Laterans will just do that. No dying wish required they just intake sugar at rates that would kill us normal folk

[silly-l1ttle-guy]

bucci gang + la squadra go ice skating

i like making headcanons. also consider this an au where they all just hangout or something idk

------

BRUNO BUCCIARATI

he's never really ice skated before

he's happy to go nevertheless

he gets a hang of it fairly easily

he'll fall down a few times but he gets a good laugh about it

sticks close to Abbacchio

he'll help out Fugo once he's confident enough that he won't fall

he'll talk to the la squadra members when he takes a break from skating

like him and Prosciutto will sit down and talk for a bit

overall he has a good time

LEONE ABBACCHIO

you cannot tell me this man has never ice skated before

he used to take ice skating lessons come on

he's gracefully skating around while everyone else is falling on their asses

except for Ghiaccio, but we'll get to that later

he'll stick close to Bruno in the beginning to make sure he gets the hang of it

after Bruno gets the hang of ice skating, Abbacchio will probably give him a quick kiss and go off on his own

laughs at Giorno when he falls

"HAH! Giorno fell!"

will be offended if anyone laughs at Narancia or Trish for falling though

those are his kids, how dare they?

he'll zoom over to beat their ass

he has a fun time and shows off a lot

GIORNO GIOVANNA

he gets the hang of it after like five minutes

he's a natural at like everything

like he'll fall down a few times, but that's to be expected

and most of the time it's because Fugo's clinging onto him with the tightest grip you can imagine

"GIOGIO DON'T LET GO I'LL SLIP" "I've got you, don't worry"

this boy manages to make everything romantic.

after Fugo get's used to it they'll hold hands and skate around together

it's very cute

Sorbet and Gelato might even comment on how cute they are together (they're alive now. why? because fuck canon, that's why)

he likes to spin

you'll just see Giorno and Fugo spinning together and giggling wildly

then they have to take a break cuz they got too dizzy

he had a very fun time, probably the most fun he's had in a while

GUIDO MISTA

falls flat on his ass the moment he gets on the rink

and every five minutes after that

he'll purposefully stay close to Narancia and Trish, then grab on to them when he's about to fall and brings them down with him

they keep making jokes about each other too

"Damn Trish, I didn't think you'd be so shit at ice skating!" "Shut up Mista, you're lucky the ice can even support your fat-ass" "Yeah, I'm surprised the ice isn't cracking beneath you like in the movies" "Fuck off Narancia, you can hardly see anything with that shit eyesight of yours"

he starts sweating a lot too

Narancia and Trish end up trying to skate away from him because he smells bad

he just chases after them and subjects them to his stink

overall he has a lot of fun

PANNACOTTA FUGO

very wobbly

he just clings to Giorno for most of the time

he just really doesn't wanna slip and fall

not because it'd hurt, but because Narancia, Mista and Trish would tease him about it for weeks

he eventually gets the hang of it and just holds Giorno's hand and skates around with him

he's very peaceful during this time

GIORNO KEEPS SPINNING HIM AROUND AND HE WON'T STOP

they eventually have to take a break because he got too dizzy

Illuso probably makes fun of him for "being weak"

he just threatens him while trying not to throw up

"What? Are you too weak to handle a bit of spinning?" "Don't make me get out Purple Haze..." "HAHA NEVERMIND I WAS KIDDING"

he has a fun time with Giorno :]

NARANCIA GHIRGA

Stays close to Mista and Trish

they do stupid shit together lmao

"Trish I dare you to lick the ice" "EW no! Mista should do it" "WHY AM I BEING TARGETTED?!"

Have I mentioned that they only bully Mista

it's because Mista can take anything they throw at him

like literally he just brushes it off

Narancia falls over like 447837269 times

most of it is Mista's fault tho

I NEED TO STOP TALKING ABOUT MISTA HOLY SHIT

he does a stupid thing and skates over a thin patch of ice

it breaks and he falls in

Abbacchio zooms in to save him lmao

he has to go home early :[

he had a lot of fun though, minus the fact that he fell into the water

TRISH UNA

she's probably pretty good at ice skating

this is her first time, but she likes rollerskating so she gets the hang of it

she stays with Narancia and Mista

also her and Narancia keep bullying Mista, as stated before

she probably convinces Mista to carry her at some point

only for them both to fall

"DAMNIT TRISH! WE FELL BECAUSE YOU'RE TOO FAT!" "SHUT UP, FATTY!"

then they apologize because they feel bad

"You're not actually that fat btw Trish" "Yeah neither are you"

then they go right back to bullying each other

she ends up going home early with Narancia and Abbacchio

she has a really fun time though

RISOTTO NERO

he's so fucking scared of slipping it's hilarious

he's a big guy, everyone's gonna notice

also scared of falling through the ice

the only reason he's there is to make sure no one dies

which means making sure Ghiaccio doesn't kill someone

the ice cracked a little under him and he got so fucking scared lmao

like he just stood there

for five minutes

pissing himself cuz he thought he was gonna fall through

Someone eventually notices that he hasn't moved and comes over to check if he's ok

"Are you all good, Risotto?" "I'm going to fall through the ice. Help."

never again

GHIACCIO

figure skater

it actually calms him

literally everyone is impressed

he might even race Abbacchio if he's feeling up to it

he wins btw

will get mad if he sees someone doing it wrong though

"FORMAGGIO YOU DUMBASS! THAT'S NOT HOW YOU FUCKING SKATE!"

He uses White Album to keep the ice from melting

he's doing everyone a favour fr

ESPECIALLY since Mista is naturally a very warm person

he took warm-blooded seriously

anyway Ghiaccio is very good at ice skating

he has a good time

PROSCIUTTO AND PESCI

Pesci is too scared to get on the ice

Prosciutto bullies him into ice skating

I don't really have any headcanons for these guys

also my fingers are starting to hurt so I gotta wrap it up

they have an ok time

MELONE

he's pretty good at ice skating

stares at people asses while they skate though

that's all from him

he had a good time

FORMAGGIO

dick cheese

makes fun of Narancia for falling

gets beaten by Abbacchio

has to leave early

did not have a good time

ILLUSO

shit at skating

keeps fucking falling

did not have fun

SORBET AND GELATO

romantic

they kiss

and try to give relationship advice to people

"Bruno, we've got some advice for you" "Hey Abbacchio, want some relationship advice?" "GIORNO WE CAN TEACH YOU HOW TO BE A GOOD BOYFRIEND!"

They have fun

[dumb-teambucciarati-headcanons]

Got any headcanons about team Bucciarati and their relationships/thoughts on the members of La Squadra? :eyes:

Yes!!! I love this ask! This is gonna take place in my everyone lives au, that most of my headcanons take place in. SPOILER WARNING btw

this one is kind of long.

-firstly, Trish hates them all and for good reason.

-secondly, Bruno has an issue with their morals when it comes to selling drugs. Because drugs are like, his least favorite thing. They call him no drugs Bruno.

-Thirdly, they all adore Sorbet and Gelato!

FORMAGGIO:

- Giorno gets along with formaggio alright, he thinks he is a piece of shit though. But he finds his shrinking stand to be very interesting and they have combined their powers together before to make a tiny jungle.

-Narancia and Mista are best buddies with Formaggio, and they cause chaos all the time. Narancia and Formaggio have a little rivalry going on though because of their fight, but they’re pals because they are all dumbasses.

-Fugo hates him because when Fugo gets upset about something, Formaggio will activate his stand to make him small so his yelling is higher pitched.

-Abbacchio doesn’t like when Formaggio is around because he makes the loud ones even louder. He has a special pair of noose cancelling headphones for when he visits.

-Bruno doesn’t really talk to or like Formaggio.

ILLUSO:

-Giorno respects him for the fight they had and the determination he showed. Hates his guts though.

-Illuso can’t forgive Giorno, Fugo, or Abbacchio for causing him to go through so much pain. He doesn’t know if he blames Giorno or Fugo more for getting infected so bad with Purple haze. Those three don’t really like Illuso that much, Giorno is the only one that at least respects him out of the trio.

-Bruno thinks his stand is neat because he likes other dimension stands.

-Trish thinks his hair is ugly.

PESCI and PROSCIUTTO:

-Prosciutto likes Narancia because he reminds him a little bit of a braver Pesci. Pesci doesn’t like Narancia because he is jealous of him/thinks his big bro likes him more (which isn’t true). Narancia won’t forget how prosciutto made him look like a rotten grape.

-Mista likes Prosciutto because he shot him three times in the head, if it had been four times his ghost would hate him. He thinks Pesci looks like a pineapple.

-Abbacchio thinks Prosciutto is wonderful because he was the cause of “the best nap of his life” when he was in the turtle on the train. Like sure it almost cost him his life, but to be able to sleep like that again.

-Bruno doesn’t think Pesci is anything like Narancia, but can see where prosciutto is coming from. Bruno didn’t like Pesci at first, and is often irritated with him. But he does have a soft spot for him now.

MELONE:

-I think they all hate Melone to be honest.

GHIACCO: (or however you spell his name)

-Fugo and him talk about their anger issues and pet peeves, and Fugo gives him advice about how to control your anger better. They surprisingly get along alright, but if they are both upset at each other it is bad.

-Mista likes to irritate him. Narancia irritates him, but not on purpose.

-He and Giorno and Fugo went ice skating one time, he made the ice rink. It was summer. People were confused.

RISOTTO:

-Abbacchio doesn’t like him, there can be only one best dressed goth in town.

-Bruno respects him and likes how he cares about his team. Risotto likes Bruno, but what is up with that haircut? When his team complains to him about something he will say “well at least you aren’t working for a guy with an ugly haircut like bucciarati” and someone from his team responds with “yeah, but we get the ugly hat …”.

-Risotto likes Narancia because of how he “let him” use his stand that one time. Narancia thinks Risotto has a better outfit than Abbacchio, but he won’t say it.

[berylcups]

PT 1-How La Squadra react to you calling them their nickname/term of endearment:

CW: suggestive content

Notes: Here's something small to help with my writers block. If any of you all have any small asks like these send them to me so I can fight this block! I really wanna continue my perv series! Also pt 2 of this HC will be done soon. I want to add a lil something but don’t want to rush the rest of the guy’s entries. Next part will have risotto, prosciutto, and…. Sorbet & Gelato! 🤗 I’m going to try writing for the 2 lovebirds in my HCs now. Well it’s not much but I hope you enjoy regardless! 💜 Beryl

Formaggio: “Maggie moo, you ding dong! You bought the wrong cat food again!” you huffed.

“I did? I’m sorry sugarbunches, which one did I buy?” he asked, trying to think of what food he bought.

“You bought the regular seafood flavored cat food. Miss Priss likes the seafood flavor but has a sensitive tummy and needs the sensitive stomach formula. Now she’s gonna get diarrhea!” you explained.

“Oooooh, I see where I went wrong. My bad, babycakes. Also can you call me the other nickname? I think it sounds cuter.”He requested.

“Oh ok, which one?” you asked. “Maggio-o’s, Maggie May, Cheese Nips, Lil Peets, Cat Daddy, Big D Mcgee, M-”

“Ahem.”a voice stopped the nauseating chain of names.

“........Can we get back to the meeting please?” Risotto asked, trying to hold back a gag.

Formaggio loves pet names and doesn't give a shit who hears them. It just shows how much you love him! He will give them back with just as much enthusiasm.

He’ll ham it up with the PDA to make you feel good and to gross others out, he thinks their disgust and jealousy is funny.

He calls you the most diabetic inducing nicknames like Sweetie baby, sugarpie, honeybuns, sugartits(yes,even if you don’t have them, you’ll have to correct him on that!)

Illuso: “Rubin.(Ruby) did yo-”you got cut off rudely “EUGH” he gags.

“Really mature.” you growled. You were trying to show him a little affection and he’s being an ass. “As I was saying, Rubin did you tak-”

“Disgusting! Ew. you’re calling ME, Illuso of the Mirror THAT Filthy name?” he asked, feigning disgust.

“Sigh…Hey ASSWIPE! Did you take my shampoo?! It feels a shit ton lighter than it did the last time I used it!!!” you hissed.

“Oh, why yes of course. I did. You have good taste, you know. Look at how shiny and silky my hair looks.” he said smugly.

“You owe me 34 Euros then…”You said coolly as you walked off irritated by his behavior.

“Way to go, dumbass. They were trying to be affectionate towards you for once and you blew it.” Gelato said while snuggling into Sorbets lap.

“How do you know? When hasY/N EVER been affectionate?” Illuso brushed him off.

“Uh, that’s exactly my point. They’re so shy it probably it took everything out of them to call you that. They called you “Rubin” aka-RUBY, because your eyes are red. THEY LIKE YOUR EYES. Do I need to get some crayons and draw it out for you?” Gelato said snarkily.

“...Oh. “ he realized his own stupidity for once.

He follows you to your room to beg for forgiveness. Illuso has pride but he’ll put it aside when it comes to you.

“C’mon bambina/o, I’m sorry. I didn’t know you were trying to be sweet on me. Really! Please forgive me.” he said looking at you with his big pleading red eyes.

“Oh…ok fine. But don’t do it again. That was embarrassing.” you said letting him hug you.

Depending on how you are he’s either going to pretend to be disgusted and be grossed out when you call him super mushy pet names. But the super romance-y ones he’ll tolerate in public…if he understands them(let him know in advance to prevent the situation above).

He doesn’t really give out pet names in public but he gives them out generously in private.

He’ll call you flashy names like Diamond, Stella, and Luna.

Pesci: “Lil’ Guppy! Check out this Cruise! We HAVE to save up for this so we can go on vacation!” you jumped up and down excitedly showing him the page in the magazine.

“O-oh uh ok.” He stuttered. He was embarrassed by the nickname being used in front of the guys but didn’t have the heart to tell you not to say it in fear of being mean.

“Lil’ guppy??? How cute.” Illuso snickered.

“Uh…Y/N? Can I speak to you…alone?” he asked nervously.

“Yeah! Hmm? Whats wrong?” you looked concerned.

“Um uh I-....Uh could you..? Could you not call me that in front…of the guys?” he asked, fidgeting with his fingers.

You looked hurt, you could feel the tears form but fought them back. You understood, he was an easy target to be made fun of.

“Oh uh…Ok. I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to embarrass you.” You whimpered.

“No no! Please don’t cry! Im sorry!” he hugged you tightly. “Don’t cry my precious little pearl!’

“No its okay! Honestly! I understand. The guys are kinda mean, and like to pick on you. You’re trying your best to not be seen as a mammoni and I need to help with that so I’m not gonna call you that-in public.” You said hugging back.

“Thank you Y/N. You’re so nice and understanding. I’m glad I have you as my partner.” he beamed.

He can’t be seen as a mammoni. As much as he loves to be loved, he has to keep away from the PDA!

He’ll love and cuddle you in private and do whatever you need when you two are alone.

He loves to call you names related to the sea. He likes to call you his pearl, Mermaid, Angelfish

Melone: Melone was busy on his laptop completely unaware of your presence. “Melone.” no answer…”melone.” nothing. “Mel.” nope. “MELONE.” Is he ignoring you??? “Honeydew~!”

“Yes Amore~?” he purred looking up at you.

You scowled and folded your arms. “Where's my underwear?”

“Which ones?” he asked, trying not to smirk.

“The _______ ones. They have the ____ on them. They were very EXPENSIVE.” you said firmly.

“Oh those…I’m wearing them,” he said casually.

“Bad Honeydew.”You took out the spray bottle of air freshener and sprayed him twice.

“Not in the eyes!” he coughed.

“This is getting weird...I’m gonna leave now.” Pesci slowly got up and cautiously snuck off.

Melone LOVES terms of endearment and nicknames. He actively encourages it and won’t answer you sometimes like above until you say it.

As a PDA lover he’ll call you lots of pets names with much praise.

“You look handsome/beautiful today Mama/Papa!”

He likes to call you parental related names (not in a sexual way) because he dreams of having children with you someday! Or if you’re not interested in children, maybe some cats and dogs. Or reptiles and his Juniors(He’ll make sure they won’t harm their 2nd parent he promises on his own life!) He calls you Mama/Mommy or Papa/Daddy, or Zommy/Zaddy. He’ll respect your gender of course.

Ghiaccio: “Kě’ài Bǎobèi~!(cutie baby) Welcome back! How was your mission? You’re unharmed and in one piece, I assume it went very well.” you jumped off the sofa and gave him a death gripping hug. The guys snickered, watching you nuzzle your face in his chest. “ I miss miss miss miss miss miss miss miss miss miss missed you!”

Ghiaccio’s face was as red as his glasses. “ Goddamnit Y/N! They know that means something mushy! you can’t call me that in front of everyone!” he yelled not in his usual angry tone but in an embarrassed and annoyed tone as he tried to gently but firmly nudge you off.

The guys would tease him and call him the same name you call him.

No worries, he can handle his own. He would threaten to beat them with an inch of their lives...and they know he would.

He won’t admit it but he likes the cute nicknames you give him, especially if they are other languages since he has a fixation on language.

In private he’d blush and try not to smile…but he fails at that.

He’ll call you his own favorite pet names and give you a hug and a kiss on the forehead.🥺

He doesn’t look like the type but hes got a few cutesy names too like snow angel, powder puff, and snowflake.❄️

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again 1/2/2024

it’s quite satisfying how the year started on a monday

listening

first song of the year: how could it be anything other than Sabata. this is the theme from the titular Sabata, i meant to pick the theme from Return of Sabata but im not mad about it.

-

reading

i read Tim Marchman’s Popping Tins newsletter (a newsletter about fish and seafood) less bc i enjoy locking Mack in the bathroom every time i want a tuna melt and more for the droll authorial voice. i have bought a tin of mackerel after reading some entries, and it was very good but much much richer than tuna.

What should I do with this can of krill meat?

after consulting the importer’s website:

This is accompanied by a photograph of the can featuring easily-discerned black eyes, which are nothing to be concerned about, according to the company that produces this can. The first question on its FAQ page is “What are the little black speckles in my can?” “No need to be concerned here!” the answer reads. “Your meat is not dirty, and you did not get a defected can. Our Antarctic Krill meat contains the most nutritious parts of the krill, which happen to include their eyes.

…

The risks here are clear: I could vomit when I open the can and see the nutritious black eyes staring at me; I could destroy the peace in my home by making it smell like sautéed and simmered krill; and/or I could ruin a perfectly delicious lunch by introducing nutritious eyes and hard bits of chitin.

i have no memory of how i found this newsletter.

i keep forgetting i have ten hoopla credits a month through my old library and i want to read more comics this year bc reading comics is fun. in the past in practice this means ive binged all ten credits over a weekend. this weekend i had time for exactly one.

The Riddler: Year One is an extremely direct tie-in to the movie and i think it’s neat they let the riddler’s actor paul dano go wild with his backstory and then turn it into a comic. it’s fun when actors get to do weird tie-in shit.

(non-sequential pages)

watching this forensic accountant’s brain crack and scramble like an egg as he struggles to really grasp the enormity of gotham corruption and why the city is such a dogshit miserable place to live in made me go “oh huh that was a pretty good writing decision in the movie”. not that the riddler was terribly stable to begin with but the despair and the unraveling were very effectively conveyed. this comic has a lot of fun with funky layouts (left) and an entire issue (right) is conspiracy board shit on top of accounting forms which is a neat artistic choice.

deeply depressing but an interesting new little window into the rpatz batman (god i hope we get more rpatz batman films) and fun to look at.

how i found this: trawling the popular comics page on hoopla

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watching

this is the seventh year of starting a new-to-me classic black and white movie around 1030/11 PM New Year’s Eve and i am annoyed i didn’t like the movie that started this year but, according to the data, it’s been fifty-fifty so far.

previous years have featured: sunset boulevard, yojimbo, the thin man, it happened one night, bringing up baby, the big sleep, and now roman holiday (1953, dir. Wyler).

this is the platonic ideal of a classic movie. it’s not sterile but it’s so… unobjectionable. wholesome (derogatory) even. not particularly what i was looking for in a movie but, much like the gelato and champagne that pop up, it was kind of a sweet nothing. i don’t think anyone eats any real food this whole movie?

this is never a movie that feels rushed. it is two hours of watching beautiful people traipse around a beautiful city in beautiful edith head costumes. i would not say there is a lot of tension for the first hour and a half. however, imo, it does land its ending and for that i can forgive it a great deal. this is another beautiful movie that is simply not for me.

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playing

have you ever wanted an open world rpg where you play as a shark? congrats, this was apparently free on epic a while back

Maneater has a tremendously fun prologue where you play as the soon-to-be-dead mother shark who is absolutely going to town on a crowded beach and destroying multiple spear-gun-wielding divers and multiple boats full of citizens exercising their second amendment rights. this prologue is an excellent choice by the game bc it locks the fun part (eating people) behind several hours of really grindy shit. i am not entertained by the grind of eating progressively larger muskellunge, avoiding alligators, and collecting license plates. the grind is EXCEPTIONALLY grindy, i put about three hours into it and have only gotten to level 5 (teen) and have only two mutations i can sink loot into (four types of loot gained from eating other fish. this is too many types imo). i am not anywhere near a recommended level to start fucking humans up. im also not super impressed with the open world aspects of it— there are not a lot of things to do, discover, or interact with in the first two areas.

this seems like a really fun game that clotheslined itself with a cripplingly slow upgrade cycle. im sure the mid and late game are hysterically fun, especially on stream. however i am not willing to put in the hours to get to the fun part when i could immediately be having fun in some other game.

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making

a lot of profoundly uninteresting cleaning. after not being able to figure out why my office (where Phil [no longer in heat. for now] lives) still reeks of piss even after stealing a blacklight from a friend and cleaning with a blacklight, it is of course bc she has been pissing in secret places i didn’t think she could get to. upside down smile emoji. both the girls got their monthly flea goop yesterday and were deeply unhappy about it.

most of my plants died in the move and i am finally tackling the survivors. fan favorite giant snake plant (not pictured, tidied up and inside) did make it and pull through but is not happy about it. now that i have baby basil and baby dill sprouting in the kitchen i do need to do something with the balcony so they have somewhere to grow up study and strong.

also slammed that silly little blondeyes NFT thing up on the archive