#gate paper analysis
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chronurgy · 1 year ago
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Gortash designs and builds mechanisms so I imagine he has to be able to sketch fairly decently in order to sketch his projects and designs. And I'm imagining a pile of charcoal sketches of Durge, done over their entire acquaintance, starting out with sketches of them in battle and then slowly becoming more detailed and intimate and as they do, the titles changing from things like "The Bhaalspawn" and "Bhaal's Chosen at Their Bloody Work" to "The Chosen in Contemplation" and finally just Durge's name
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itsclydebitches · 1 year ago
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Zevlor: An Angsty Character Analysis
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Hey, Zevlor simps. Can I interest anyone in 4,000 words about our favorite disaster tiefling? 💀
“We can’t stay, but we’ll be slaughtered if we leave—we’re no fighters.”
Back during my first play-through this is the line that turned Zevlor from another dime-a-dozen, exposition spouting NPC to a character I was legitimately interested in. “We’re no fighters.” My DnD ignorance abounds, but even I could see that wasn’t an accurate statement. Here’s a mountain of a man sporting fancier armor than my level 2 Tav knows exists yet, having wrecked half the goblin hoard with his crossbow and, if you let him, he'll happily turn to punching as a solution to verbal disagreements. Plus, he’s clearly the one giving the orders, so what do you mean you’re not a fighter?
Having explored the Grove a bit I chalked it up to a generalized assessment of the refugees as a whole. They’re mostly kids, civilians, and would-be protectors who only look the part of fighters in cobbled-together armor. One woman is grappling with the guilt of killing someone for the first time, even an enemy. Lakrissa is sure they’re all going to get slaughtered and is willing to put money on that fact. Meanwhile, the couple you meet are more concerned with what pet they’ll get when they somehow, someway, make it to the city. Don't worry about how that'll happen. You learn later that even those like Ronan are small potatoes compared to most of the baddies you’ll face. On paper he looks and sounds like the real deal—dressed in robes, talking up an apprenticeship with the famous Lorroakan—but scenes like the celebration light show and his own fury at needing to be saved, again, highlight how far he still has to go. The point is that Zevlor is right: these aren’t fighters and he at 18 strength, paladin, former commander, is definitely the exception.
However, BG3 is the sort of detail-heavy game where I’d expect them to include that exception in the dialogue. “We can’t stay, but we’ll be slaughtered if we leave—these people aren’t fighters.” Zevlor’s inclusion of himself in this assessment continued to nag at me and it didn’t start to make sense until I delved into his tag here on tumblr, with more patient players than myself posting everything there is to know about the tiefling. (Thanks, all.) Zevlor is fascinating to me in part because he has this contradictory nature, one example of which is that he’s a very talented fighter who desperately doesn’t want to be a fighter anymore.
…but also he totally does.
We overhear in his dialogue to Tilses that Zevlor is adamant about shedding the titles he’s earned through combat: Hellrider, Commander, Sir. He insists that they’re just civilians now and it’s not like he’s being disingenuous here—note that he introduces himself as just “Zevlor” to Tav. Zevlor means what he says to Tilses and we can see that he’s trying to both reinforce his point and lesson the blow by referring to her as “Tilly.” The nickname is a sweet one, hinting at their close bond in just a single word, reminding her that he’s not saying this to hurt her, he cares for her… but the nickname is simultaneously something he never would have used as her commander. The intimacy meant to comfort is also a hard blow to weather. They're now people who use nicknames inappropriate for the hierarchy of battle.
So Zevlor means what he says here, means it enough that Tilses is convinced and drops her use of “Commander,” but there’s definitely a hint of bitterness in his voice. At least, I’ve always heard it. Zevlor is steadfast in his conviction here, even going so far as to say, “I’m done soldiering, Tilly” when discussing what will come next at Baldur’s Gate. Yet for all of that his tone conveys (understandable) anger and disappointment that it’s come to this. Zevlor doesn’t act like someone who truly wants this change, but rather someone who’s been forced to accept it.
Is it outside forces unwillingly influencing him then? Did Avernus truly change things irrevocably? No, not really. At least, not in the way Zevlor likes to claim. Tilses herself states that being a Hellrider is for life; nothing can take away that title. You lost your post? Your whole city? Most of the people under your protection? Doesn’t matter! You’re a Hellrider forever, no matter the circumstances. I can easily picture a time in Zevlor's life where he would have agreed with Tilses wholeheartedly. They are Hellriders, dammit, and so long as there’s one person looking for their help they will wield that title alongside their blades. And right now, Zevlor has a lot more than just one person in need of his assistance.
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So it’s not that Avernus truly stripped them of that identity. Nothing can do that. Zevlor is not rejecting titles and planning retirement because the mechanisms of fate are forcing him to.
He’s doing all that because he’s lost confidence in himself.
Even as someone with a shaky understanding of DnD classes, I love the parallel between a broken oath and the rejection of a lifelong title. If Zevlor can fail in his oath—or in his faith entirely, according to the memories stemming from his pod—why-ever would he think that any other ‘permanent’ part of his identity was worth fighting for? If you can loose the very thing you’ve built your entire life around, every important aspect of yourself, tied to your very soul… what’s a bestowed title compared to that? Zevlor doesn’t believe himself worthy of being a Hellrider anymore, but I think that goes deeper than a string of horrific circumstances making him feel incompetent. As an Oathbreaker, Zevlor likely believes that if he couldn’t uphold that, he can’t uphold anything. Calling himself a Hellrider would be a lie. A fiction. A pathetic, dangerous, insulting fiction at that. It’s like calling yourself the “Hero” while continually failing those around you. Sure, others might insist it’s a title you’ve earned, one you will always carry with you, but you don’t believe them anymore and at a certain point calling yourself that feels worse than embracing the title of “Villain." You don’t want to be the villain… but you want to pretend you’re the hero even less. Pretending is exhausting.
We see this struggle in the many ways that Zevlor fails, or almost fails, to uphold the ideals that originally guided him. I use the term “villain” above deliberately because Zevlor is not merely a former hero-type who’s self confidence has been shattered, or who has been reduced to a civilian, or who thinks themselves useless; he’s actively fighting against temptations that, under less stressful situations, he’d never even consider. I don’t think he is a villain, I think he’s a flawed, struggling victim who sees his own, inevitable mistakes as villainous—and the longer that warped perspective continues the easier it is to fall into bad behaviors. This cycle is perfectly summarized in the autobiography Zevlor keeps by his bed:
“When every passer-by thinks you a thief and a heretic, it is deeply tempting to become one.”
We don’t know if this is Zevlor’s autobiography (as far as I’m aware, anyway) but even if it’s not the words have clearly resonated enough for him to keep them nearby. This particular line paints a pretty clear picture of Zevlor’s struggle. If everyone you meet says you’re devil-kin, vermin, or would-be criminal, isn’t it easier to just give them what they want? If you can’t persuade them otherwise, why put in the effort of trying? If he can’t be Faithful to his God, why have faith in anything at all? If he can’t save these people—setback after setback, mistake after mistake—why is he even making the effort?
Zevlor obviously is trying, very, very hard, which is why such thoughts are merely temptations rather than actual, questionable actions. Still, the Grove gives us numerous examples of the precipice he’s balanced on—and the ways Tav can tip him in one direction or another. You can talk Zevlor down from his anger and get him to acknowledge his disgust in nearly sinking to Aradin’s level. You can also let him boil over and punch the human at a time when the last thing anyone needs is more violence. You can convince Zevlor that there are peaceful ways of stopping Kagha's ritual, or you can help him in pursuing the darker temptation to kill her. It’s a “low” thought, but at his own admission he hasn’t been above entertaining it. Zevlor’s requests for help, though always polite and humble, carry a spark of manipulation in them too. He’s not above leveraging your previously selfless good deed to his advantage—"She owes you for saving this grove"—and if you approach him before speaking with Kagha he’ll claim that the ritual will “be trouble—for all of us.” Except, no? Not really? Tav can make it clear that they’re just here for a healer, they’re only passing through, and as a fighter they are not beholden to the Grove’s sanctuary as the teiflings are. It’s not trouble for everyone involved, yet Zevlor frames it as such in the hopes that (unnecessary) self-interest may motivate you if selflessness fails. Finally, if Zevlor dies in your play-through and you use Speak the Dead on him, he will admit to having “plenty” of secrets, none of which he’ll share. Admittedly, this may be the result of cut content, specifically a story-line in which Zevlor knowingly betrays the tieflings rather than being tricked by the Absolute. Still, the game as it stands is the story we have and within it we’re given a man who is both fighting against these dark urges (ha) and has a past riddled with secrets. If Zevlor is anything, it’s blunt when it comes to his own failings, accurate and otherwise. So how terrible must these secrets be that he outright refuses to divulge them when, generally speaking, most corpses speak freely in death?
However, out of all of this the struggle I’m most intrigued by is the one surrounding the gate. Zevlor represents the tieflings: persecuted refugees, vulnerable civilians, people seeking to survive through cooperation, specifically by joining a community. Kagha represents the druids (or at least a vocal subset of them in Halsin’s absence): bigoted individuals, powerful fighters, people seeking to survive by giving in to their fears, specifically by keeping themselves isolated. This is the moral dichotomy of the Grove and it is symbolized through the gate. Zevlor wants to open it to everyone whereas Kagha wants to close it, permanently.
So isn’t it odd that Zevlor is the one ordering it shut?
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When the scene first starts Kanon shouts down that no, he won’t open the gate. Zevlor said that no one is allowed in. Notably, he’s saying this to Aradin and his crew, people that the Grove is at least passingly familiar with, given that Halsin left with them to search the temple. It’s also notable that Zevlor isn’t expecting goblins to attack the Grove. He’s shocked that this is suddenly a problem, brought about by Aradin’s decision—“You lead them here?”— and the entire point of staying at the Grove is that it’s at least comparatively safe. Yes, there have been more attacks lately, but Zevlor seems to be relying on the Grove’s relatively unknown location, as well as the fact that goblins are normally disorganized. The safety is only compromised because Aradin brought a hunting party back, so Zevlor has no reason to expect any visitors, let alone ones that would be a threat.
More importantly, he should welcome such visitors even if he did expect them. After all, that’s precisely what the tieflings are: strangers with no ulterior motives other than to survive. Broadly speaking it makes perfect sense why he'd shut the gates. Zevlor’s first priority is to his people, so anything that keeps them safe is, theoretically, a good thing. But through the lens of his specific characterization and this specific, moral dilemma, it’s an awfully hypocritical decision. Based on everything we’ve seen, our party would not have been welcomed by Zevlor if we’d arrived without danger on our heels and a rescue to endear him to us. So his people should be welcomed, trusted, kept safe, given the benefit of the doubt… but Zevlor isn’t necessarily willing to extend that same trust to others. At the end of the day, he and Kagha want a version of the same thing: safety for those they deem are worthy of it.
It’s precisely these flaws and temptations that make Zevlor such a great character to me, even before he’s tricked by the Absolute. The fandom has leaned hard into Zevlor’s self-loathing and let me tell you, I love it (kisses, hugs, and cookies for you all), but canonically I think he has more reason to fear himself than we tend to portray in the H/C fics. I’m not saying he’s a bad person. Rather, it’s precisely because Zevlor is such a good person that he has the capacity to fall so far. It’s his all-consuming desire to protect his family that leads Zevlor to do and consider so much that a paladin would normally balk at. Denying others the safety you’ve been granted. Subtly manipulating others to do your dirty work. Considering murder.
Zevlor is someone torn between doing the Right Thing and the thing he believes will help those under his care survive. Importantly, when we first meet him he considers these to be two separate courses of action. So can you imagine what goes through his head when he first sees Tav saving everyone and doing so righteously? I think it’s integral to Zevlor’s characterization that the game all but forces you to play the Good Guy in that initial encounter. A cut scene starts, you’re thrown into combat immediately afterwards, and unless you plan to start attacking the Grove members alongside the goblins (which the mechanics discourage through the coloring that distinguishes enemies from allies) you will always finish this fight as Zevlor’s hero. Sure, you can be an asshole afterwards and demand payment. You could already be plotting your betrayal and the slaughter of all the refugees. But in this moment you are nothing but a miracle made flesh in his eyes. Right from the start Tav is succeeding in all the ways Zevlor feels like he's failed. You're the hero.
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More specifically, you’re an Every-Man Hero. We might have epic backstories for our Tavs, but within confines of the game you’re largely a nobody when not playing an Origin character. How powerful must that have been to witness then? A total stranger, someone who has no ties to the tieflings or even, depending on your class, any sworn reason to help others, putting their life on the line to save what is most precious to Zevlor? I think a lot about the fact that he never asks Wyll to step in and try to change Kagha’s mind. She owes him just as much as she does Tav—Wyll is an equal participant in that fight and, if your shoddy play style is anything like mine, he likely did more damage—and Wyll is clearly invested in the tiefling’s survival, training the kids as he is. Now, obviously Zevlor’s reticence is largely a question of assigned roles (we need to be the one engaging with Kagha because we’re the protagonist/player) but, like Zevlor’s choice to include himself in the Not a Fighter group, it would have been all too easy to explain this away within the narrative. One comment about how Wyll already tried and failed, or how Kagha doesn’t trust Warlocks, or hell, maybe you don’t meet Wyll in the Grove at all. It’s an easy thing to accomplish and though this is edging more into the realm of headcanon than anything else, I can’t help but think that Wyll isn’t the kind of person that Zevlor could turn to for help right now. Because he’s a folk hero. The Blade of Frontiers, known far and wide for his impressive, selfless deeds. Zevlor is struggling so hard to keep the tieflings safe, tempted by all the unsavory solutions that might achieve that, drowning in self-hatred as his past and current failings catch up with him, wanting nothing more than to be his peoples’ protector:
“I would be a paladin again—with a god’s purpose, a god’s power. Everything I needed to protect my people. And all the while, the cult tortured them. They fought, and ran, and died around me, while I imagined myself their savior.”
Three of the things Zevlor mutters while trapped in the pod are “Hellrider… for… life…,” “Trust… in me…,” and “Children… look away… look at me…” He wants to be the protector, the one children look to for reassurance, he wants his words to Tilly to be a lie and he wants a way to prove that he is a Hellrider for life… but he’s not. At least, Zevlor doesn’t believe it. He lost his titles while Wyll still proudly bears his. Wyll trains the children to fight while Zevlor can only get swept up in anger at them being threatened. The people trust Wyll, adore him, he’s the hero and Zevlor… is not. Not anymore.
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It’s too painful to approach Wyll and admit all that. That would be a hell of a blow to Zevlor's pride. But Tav? A stranger? A nobody? The Every-man who had no reason to help or reputation pressuring them, saving them anyway? That’s inspiring. Someone like Tav could be the answer and even, perhaps, the proof that Zevlor could redeem himself. Neither of them are folk heroes, untouchable in their assumed perfection. Tav is a living, breathing example of how the flawed, everyday adventurer can be everything Zevlor strives for.
No wonder he won’t shut up about them in the Shadowlands.
All of this is why it’s so tragic that Zevlor wasn’t given a redemption arc. Sure, you can recruit him for the final battle against the Netherbrain, but there’s no quest to change the cast’s opinion of him—or change Zevlor’s opinion of himself. All his content at the end of Act 2 and Act 3 reinforces that self-hatred.
Let’s make a list, shall we?
Nearly every line of his reunion with Tav has Zevlor painting himself in the worst light possible, from “a lie kinder than the truth” to his refusal to join you because he believes he’ll stab you in the back. You cannot convince him of the Absolute’s manipulation and there’s no response to his belief that such horrors start within the person like, “Of course it does! Because we’re all flawed and equally capable of good and evil deeds! That potential doesn’t make you irredeemable, Zevlor, it makes you mortal!!”
He’s utterly failed as his peoples’ champion and he’s also deemed “unworthy” of being a True Soul. Obviously not being chosen by the Absolute is a good thing, but for a man drowning in self-loathing that’s one hell of a complicated rejection.
Nearly all the tieflings hate him now, all those people he’s been sacrificing his soul to keep safe. I found it particularly devastating that this is one of the rare occasions where nailing a persuasion check doesn’t change the person’s mind. There’s at least one tiefling at Moonrise (I’m drawing a blank on her name) who will believe you when you explain how the Absolute influenced Zevlor, but that doesn’t lead to forgiveness.
Zevlor is deemed unimportant on a literal, narrative level. He is very easy to miss in the pods (I nearly did on my first play-through) and the game does incredibly little to dissuade you from that mistake. Putting aside for a moment that obviously an Origin companion is more significant than a minor NPC, compare this to Shadowheart screaming from her own pod, the game making it abundantly clear that this is someone in need of help—someone worth rescuing. She’ll even say later that you could have run past, more concerned with your own survival and the big picture heroics to bother with her. How must it feel then, if Zevlor ever learns that Tav was there and never stopped for him?
If you do miss Zevlor… oh boy. We’ve probably all seen at least a recording of Orin’s so-called gift. There are plenty of characters who can meet untimely and devastating ends, but very few go through this level of horror. Zevlor—after being held captive, remember—is tortured by God’s Favorite Torturer. He is stripped of his personhood and reduced to a mere “message,” a “pet.” Zevlor is further humiliated in death by being literally stripped of his armor—not just vulnerable in his nakedness, but denied the last symbol of his faith, his status, his power—and it’s always struck me that this is the closest we see to him 'enjoying' an intimate moment, this parody in Orin’s painting. Zevlor is one of the NPC’s most in need of physical comfort and instead he’s forced into this torturous mockery of a sex scene. It also hits hard that when Tav first spots his body the narration says that Zevlor “might almost be sleeping.” Undoubtedly this is a man who isn’t taking good care of himself. He needs a good night’s rest, yet this horrifying trick is all he gets.
As if all this weren’t enough, most of your companion are VERY critical of Zevlor while commenting on his demise. It’s one thing for the tieflings to believe the worst given their ignorance and the fact that they are the ones who suffered from Zevlor’s failure, but your company understands the Absolute and the ways that she gets her hooks in people. Still, Astarion calls him a “wet rag” even if he did deserve better than this. Shadowheart wouldn’t have wished this on him either, but she can’t help but slip in a “no matter his failings.” Lae’zel, often the most blunt, straight up says that he was “always destined to fail his people—and to fail us.” Wyll shakes his head and intones that “even good intentions can lead us down deadly paths.” Only Gale and Karlach stick to mourning the dead rather than airing his shortcomings.
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When I spoke to my allies before the final battle Zevlor didn’t have a cut scene. It became clear to me later that this must have been a bug in my play-through, but at the time it only reinforced my feelings that his story was incomplete. Looking on Youtube I’ve found recordings of him saying that he is a Hellrider once more and he would “die a proud man if [he] were to die this day”… but that rings as terribly hollow given where we left him. Last we were together, Zevlor was saying in no uncertain terms that he could not be trusted, he would fail again, he was unworthy of forgiveness. Where did this change of heart come from? It makes perfect sense that he would help Tav in this moment—he begs to be of some use after getting free—but not that he would present himself with such confidence. Within the story as it’s been told this feels… fake. Like Zevlor is putting on a mask to fit the mood of this lively, optimistic party. Which, in turn, gives the “I would die a proud man” line a terrifying implication to me. Does Zevlor expect to die this day? Does he intend to? What would persuade him not to lay down his life here and now? His mission is complete. The tieflings are safe—though not by his hand. There's no hero's welcome waiting for him after this battle. They hate him. He hates himself, and by his own admission the one thing that could still make him proud would be to die at Tav’s side, trying to do one last bit of good. If someone said that to me after everything Zevlor has been through I would keep them far away from the front lines.
(I did, for the record lol.)
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I’m not saying anything new then when I go, “Larian, PLEASE add more to his story.” Give us a Zevlor side-quest to renew his oath. Let us invite him to our camp. Something to link the broken man mid-game and the confident fighter at the end so that the latter doesn’t feel like an alarm bell with two legs and a tail. I mean yeah, I get hooked on minor characters so 75% of this is simply me wanting more content of a fave, but I also I do legitimately believe that BG3’s story would benefit from tying up loose ends like this.
Zevlor is a fantastic character, someone who contains an astounding amount of complexity for so little screen time. You have to follow up on that complexity though. If he’s meant to be a purely tragic figure, okay, fine, that’s the ending you get with Orin. But one where he joins you with a smile and reclaims a title he's previously rejected with such fervor requires more work in the middle; a through-line that explains how someone with so much self-loathing learns to think of himself as the hero again.
Because it does all come down to Zevlor’s perception of himself. He was always a hero, flaws and all. He always was and always will be a Hellrider.
The UI knows what's up :)
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justgivemethephd · 1 month ago
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17.10.2024
Hey everyone! I went to see Cosmo Sheldrake last night and it was a religious experience. Cosmo is an incredible live performer as well as a genuinely funny and likeable human being. He was smiling the whole time and you could tell me was having so much fun. He had so much appreciation for the people working with him too!! It was lovely to see.
Today I finally gave the presentation I've been working on for about a week and a half now. I was genuinely excited about presenting this paper, and although I don't think I did as well as I thought I would everyone on my team was telling me they really liked it. They told me I was being cynical by not accepting their compliments, but honestly I don't know what to think. Anyway, I'm going to spend most of today working on preparations for my upgrade report and finishing an analysis that I was asked to do last week. I'm a little defeated after the presentation, but hopefully I can get back on track and have a productive day.
Remember to be gentle and patient with yourself! There are better days ahead.
_____
🎧 - Interdimensional by Cosmo Sheldrake
🎮 - Baldur's Gate 3
📖 - The River of Silver by Shannon Chakraborty
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barbwritesstuff · 7 months ago
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1/?
Ashdhdhsg ok if you don’t mind my Chris obsession in your inbox, here’s some more!
Some disclaimers:
1) this is going to get. um. pretty granular.
2) I'm code diving for the sake of optimizing my Comparative Chris Studies.
3) My analysis going to be filtered through the lens of my own playthroughs and emotional reactions.
4) I will be asking lots of questions, mostly rhetorical - I am simply enchanted by the possibilities of the text. Please don’t answer any of them unless you really feel like it - I don’t want to bombard you!!
5) This is already pretty lengthy and I'm far from done -_-; I'm numbering these asks to avoid confusion.
Beginning from the beginning: Chris suing for everything is sooo awful I love them. The later reveal that they’re a lawyer is insane context for the first divorcee scene:
“there is no going back once there are lawyers involved. There is no hope for a reunion, or even an amiable end. Lawyers mean two things. Pain and paper. That's the only way this can end now. Pain and fucking paper.”
Jesus Christ mc, tell me how you really feel. The way this frames their perception of the entire relationship as doomed from the beginning, even if it's just subconscious? The way it frames their perception of Chris as a person? ouch.
Early Chris is so interesting from meta perspective. In these early scenes, your reading of their character changes pretty drastically with your assumptions about the relationship and the character/personality of your own mc. You can totally play as an mc who justifies this kind of treatment and is as uncommunicative, unreliable, and unable to let things go as Chris later accuses them of being and has imploded the relationship on the strength of their own bad behaviour, but if you interpret the relationship as ending more from mutually terrible communication skills and regular stressful life stuff? Going scorched earth like this can’t be seen as self protective in the same way - it’s so extreme. It's fun to ponder on Chris containing all of these messy and intricate possibilities regardless of worldstate. This is the kind of thing I love about interactive fiction as a medium, and you handle it so precisely and delicately here, leaving so much room for the player to build their own character while remaining grounded in the story.
The line that’s been stuck in my head since the first time I read it was this one:
“You got Spaghetti before you even met that lying arsehole.”
The mc is either accusing Chris of being a liar in general (which strikes me unlikely from the sense of the character that we get later) or of being a liar within this specific scenario, the divorce. So what did they lie about? Are they not honouring a prenup? or was there no prenup, only a verbal agreement to split things fairly and lovingly in the impossibly unlikely event of a divorce? Is the mc upset specifically about the breaking of marriage vows? Chris clearly has gotten their ducks in order before serving the mc with the divorce papers (another revealing fragment of character that I obsess over. what was up with that). Is it the fact that they must have been planning to break up for a while and instead of navigating it mutually decided instead to blindside the mc? How do you go from wanting to raise a child with someone to coming right out of the gate with a litigious divorce within a few months?
I want to live inside their walls. who said that.
Copy + Paste:
2/?
Side note 1: that waitress seems really sweet cool and genuinely concerned over the mc :(
Side note 2: vampires flush when sated 👀
Side note 3: 911 calls are generally recorded and can often be accessed after the fact with freedom of information requests. Could Chris have unearthed it during their later search for mc? How creepy, if they did. Heavy, panicked breathing, the crunch of broken glass, the call just disconnects. Confirmation of something awful but beyond understanding.
They way you get me immediately into full breakup mode with one line:
"Come back in the morning," Chris says in that slow, specific way, as if speaking to a very young, very stupid child.
IRL that would be an instant blind rage button for me lmao. How dare you speak to me that way. And again! From Chris’s perspective this is a pretty reasonable boundary! but they way they lay it out is so. IDK. Unbecoming. Unworthy of them. plain mean.
There’s this real sense I get from both sides of the relationship of “I’m not sure I ever even really knew this person” the love WAS there and it was real but in the fog of bitterness and anger they both lose sight of it and each other. There's a through line in this part of the game of the way high emotion can mess with your perception of reality and rational decision making.
“It wasn't all bad, was it? There were times you were happy together. Not that anyone would believe it, reading this.”
I interpret this line as the MC doubting Chris's fundamental intentions and affections. Coupled with Chris's lack of concern over the mc's disappearance (put a pin in it) it's just so INTERESTING to be the way that these two have come to see each other almost as strangers, which is really scary and alienating! Neither can give the other an inch of grace or benefit of the doubt. the cognitive dissonance is so compelling to me.
You've had all of these intimate moments, potentially a CHILD (a grandchild, a whole lifetime), with a person you now cannot recognize, who's actions you cannot understand. Of course Chris isn't going to let mc into their house, they could have been anywhere, doing anything, for two months now! the thought that it might not have been by anything but MC's own volition is anathema.
----------------------------------------------
I'm living for this Chris deep dive that landed in my inbox.
However, I really don't know if i can say anything without spoiling the game... so I'm sharing without comment. 💙
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zacki0gaming · 6 months ago
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My TPC Season 2, Episode 2 Deeper Analysis
Hi everyone! It's finally time to delve deeper into Season 2, Episode 2, and I'll be sharing my theories to support my analysis. Whether my final verdict scores will rise or remain the same determines the depth of analysis required for the TPC episodes. Here's how I'll structure the sections throughout the episode:
Sections
For the sections, I was going to analyze the conversations from Ajaceare/Lycanthropy and Pyrare/Ajacenus, but they don’t seemed that interested to go deeper besides Lycanthropy’s lead and Ajaceare’s pure counterpart, “Ajacent” and the sisters.
The Royal Graveyard.
Iris and Circusic’s Conversation.
1. The Royal Graveyard
Now, let’s analyze the Royal Graveyard. Looking back at this episode, It is so lore heavy… Also, before I start this off, just look how pathetic the entire graveyard’s gate looks… Look at this shit!
This gate looks so underdeveloped in the episode’s making, that it looks so pencil-drawn in which my 4th grade self CAN SIMPLY DRAW THIS SHIT ON PAPER!!! This just further proves my point on the rushed quality of the episode.
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Anyway, let’s get started here.
What is the Royal Graveyard?
Well according to Rincle, the Royal Graveyard is a graveyard where all of the spheres who used to be tied to the royal castle passed away. She also said this line “Well, except for the prince" which we could all agree that she is referring to Iris as the prince himself because clearly his parents are the king and queen of the Royal Castle.
However, Rincle never mentions anything about the prince’s parents such as the king from the “Circubit’s Reoccurring Memory” short. If this is the case, than Iris’s father might potentially be dead or maybe not.
Theory about the Royal Graveyard
In a hypothetical scenario, the presence of the corrupted flowers hovering around the Royal Graveyard suggests a level of purpose for them to be over there. The corrupts may be seeking something important over here that might indicate a means to undermine the royal lineage. I also have this to say too that might sound wild. Do you know that the Reaper creature appears to have the ability of Resurrection right?
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Well, beyond the gate, I notice a faint pink glow emanating from behind the gravestones, sparking a thought. Could it be that the Reaper creature is situated within the graveyard, utilizing its powers to reanimate the deceased spheres into more undead corrupted shapes such as Circubit.
2. Iris and Circusic’s Conversation
Now, the moment that you all been waiting for, let's analyze the conversation between Iris and Circusic. This is probably was going to be the most important aspect about this episode. But unfortunately, their conversation was pretty obviously abrupt on the surface. How about a deeper look into this might help me try and reveal its true significance.
Initial Tension and Surprise:
Circusic: "Ugh...Huh..?"
Iris: "Finally awake. Circusic?"
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After Iris questions about Circusic is actually alive, Circusic had a initial groggy response. This indicates him recovering from being unconscious for so long after getting supposedly killed by Iris’s father from the short “Circubit’s Reoccurring Memory”. Iris’s comment implies that he has been waiting for Circusic to regain consciousness for maybe hours later.
Surprise and Bitterness:
Circusic: "!"
Iris: "So. It's been awhile. You seem ALIVE and well."
Circusic: "Teh! Same to you. Iris."
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Upon Circusic notices Iris, this exclamation suggests that he was startled or alarmed by Iris’s presence. This is because of Circusic hasn’t seen Iris in such a long time, which can be confirmed from Iris’s line of dialogue here “So. It's been awhile. You seem ALIVE and well." Iris’s also acknowledges the time that has passed since him and Circusic’s last meeting before the main events of the series started. He also expresses surprise that Circusic is alive, hinting at a belief or knowledge that he shouldn't be. Circusic responds from Iris’s response with a derisive laugh, indicating bitterness. His mirroring of Iris's sentiment ("Same to you") suggests that he is equally surprised by his survival.
Underlying Resentment:
Circusic: "I don't know why you're surprised that I'm alive. Shouldn't even care anyways! You should just care about you and your girlfriend!"
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After that, Circusic’s next two responses is his confusion on Iris being surprised from him being alive and acting defensive and accusatory about him just caring for him and his girlfriend, Pentellow. He said to just care about him and his girlfriend, Pentellow implying that Iris has no right to be surprised or trying to act like he’s concern about his well-being and brings up his girlfriend, possibly as a way to deflect or hurt him.
My Theory For Underlying Resentment
Strained Relationship: From what Circusic was trying to actually say here, is that this might have something to do with past neglect or betrayal. This notion can be further supported by the symbolism of the "Broken Heart" observed in Circubit's boss fight in the preceding episode (Season 2, Episode 1). The appearance of the fractured heart during the boss fight suggests deeper emotional connotations as noted TPC analysts like @braincellll have tried to delved into implications of the heart’s symbolism. Circusic's mention of Iris's girlfriend could indicate jealously or hurt feelings.
It’s possible that Circusic did have (if this is the case) feelings for Iris. However, I don’t generally think that this is true because Circusic has a unconfirmed sexuality and their relationship is most likely more on the friendship side from my perspective.
Mystery of Survival:
Iris: "I just want to know how you are breathing right now?"
Circusic: "Oh ya know! The same way you are! And you know what I mean by that."
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Despite that, Iris’s question about Circusic is still breathing right now suggests there is a mystery behind his survival. Because of this question he answered, Circusic led out a cryptic response indicating that both of them share a common, possibly something special behind it. This line hints at a deeper connection or shared experience between the two.
But wait, I’M NOT DONE HERE!!! WATCH WHAT I’M GOING TO SAY NEXT!!!
*Rewinding Back To The Short*
Do you remember the "Iris's Discovery" short? According to this short, the events that followed the video ACTUALLY took place immediately after Season 2, Episode 2. To ensure accuracy, let me explain.
While looking back at photos of his teenage years, Iris is STILL questioning how Circusic could still be alive and well, just as he had been doing within their conversation in Season 2, Episode 2. This led him in this short to rediscover his awareness again of a familiar creature he had encountered at some point before the main events of the series began. The creature's name was "The Reaper."
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Overall, the short's title clearly indicates that Iris's persistent questions about Circusic's revival, starting in Season 2 Episode 2, ultimately led to him remembering the creature, The Reaper, once more in the "Iris's Discovery" short.This probably makes sense because from the statement from what Circusic said: “Oh ya know! The same way you are! And you know what I mean by that” which still confused Iris from the look of his expression that eventually led to what I said about the Iris’s Discovery short.
My Theory For Mystery of Survival
The Reaper Encounter: I’m starting to think that the possible implication of Circusic’s statement here that it has something to do with their encounters with the Reaper creature both its pure and the corrupted counterpart (La Danse Macabre) according to the shorts.
Iris’s Encounter: I think that Iris possibly gotten killed at some point and was revived by the Reaper creature, but at the cost of losing his hair permanently, his triangle chest glowing black, and gifted him his mark and it’s associated powers.
Circusic’s Encounter: From the look of his past, Circusic had a indirect encounter the Reaper creature, but as a corrupt (La Danse Macabre). However, he doesn’t get the chance to see it while being alive because of him after getting supposedly killed by Iris’s father in the “Circubit’s Reoccurring Memory” short.
So basically, Iris and Circusic have a similar experience with the Reaper creature from a direct and indirect standpoint before the main series even started. This does make it seem like Circusic is trying to seemingly make Iris aware of it, but was still confused from his response before figuring it out in the Iris’s Discovery short to confirmed his awareness again.
Avoidance and Frustration:
Circusic: "Anyways! I gotta get goin'!"
Iris: "Wait. I'm not done talking to you!"
Circusic: "Well. I'm done talkin' to you!"
Iris: "Damnit"
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After that weird part of the conversation, Circusic abruptly ends the conversation, indicating his desire to avoid further discussion or confrontation. Iris’s urgency suggests he has important or unresolved issues to address with Circusic. Circusic's final retort shows him shutting down the conversation, highlighting his avoidance and possible resentment. Iris's frustration at the end signifies her desperation or exasperation, emphasizing the importance of the conversation she was trying to have.
Conclusion: Overall, the dialogue in Iris and Circusic’s conversation is complicated and strained from their relationship. It is marked by past conflicts, possible implications from the Reaper creature, and unresolved emotions. Circusic’s defensiveness and frustration toward Iris shows possible neglection or betrayal that has something to do with between him and Iris’s current relationship status with his girlfriend, Pentellow. Furthermore, Circusic displays a tendency to avoid the conversation, indicating a reluctance to delve deeper into the matter—a stark contrast to Iris's persistence in seeking further engagement for closure. This dynamic shows deep underlying issues and a share history that significantly influences their current interaction within this episode.
Main Conflict: I think the main conflict between Iris and Circusic appears to stem from unresolved history and emotions. Circusic's defensive and resentful demeanor implies lingering feelings of bitterness towards Iris, possibly arising from sentiments of betrayal or abandonment. Conversely, Iris's surprise of Circusic's survival and his insistence on talking indicate he feels there are significant, unresolved matters that need to be addressed, potentially relating to past experiences.
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henrysglock · 1 year ago
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Warning: This blog is not a safe space for those who are anti-Palestine. That includes zionists. Also, I will be posting/reblogging ST5 leaks!
24 • #1 Vile Henry Creel Understander • pfp by @.stranger-comet
James' Master List
My Bullshit Theories:
The Big Analysis on The First Shadow (Nearly 50,000 words dissecting All That so you don't have to!)
Local Man Uses The Time Loop To Try And Change His Fate (An outline of the 27-year time loop that exists in Stranger Things Canon, plus an initial dive into the Upside Down's double agent)
D.A.D and The Squawk (The CONFIRMED direct connection between the radio-based Mindflayer Tracking device in TFS and the leaked radio station van)
Mirror, Mirror (The mirror in the Rainbow Room isn’t a mirror at all. It’s a window)
A Second El Has Hit The (Block) Towers (Instances of back-to-back duplicate El scenes in NINA)
This Silver Cat Has Nine Lives (There are nine distinct Brenners in the 4.01 massacre sequence alone)
Shattered Mirrors and Cracked Walls (An analysis of One’s dematerialization scene, the aftermath, and a determination that we’re being shown at least 4 timelines in the 4.07 massacre)
One Does Not Simply Lose A Gate (The 2nd part of the 4.07 massacre aftermath and proof that a timeline exists where Henry/Edward did nothing wrong)
Bloody Eyes, Changing Cracks, and Reversing Mirrors (The 3rd installment in the Cracks and Mirrors series: A pattern in El’s blood not only indicates 2 timelines, but also a non-Vecna One)
Well, Well...Look Whose Limbs Are Still Intact. (Part 4 of the Cracks and Mirrors series: El's eye blood pattern links to specific jumpsuits, it can be used as an indicator of attack style, and it revealed a second teen El in the 4.07 massacre.)
Where Is All The Blood Coming From? (A comparison between the 4.07 massacre's blood and the carnage resulting from democreature attacks)
Local Man Refuses to Pick A Damn Jumpsuit (Matching up the Dimension-X jumpsuits to 4.07 massacre jumpsuits)
Turn Around...Look At What You See...(At least one version of Brenner saw One killing Two in 1979 rather than El with the gate, and I've got receipts for it)
The Store Room Scene In NINA Is Actually A Bunch Of Different Versions of Events Frankenstein'd Together (Contains Concrete Proof)
The First Shadow: Impossible Timeline (The Timeline of the Newspapers Shown In The First Shadow Cannot Exist)
Why Do You, As The Big Bad, Have No Lines Or Powers? (Vecna’s physical form in the UD has no dialogue and doesn’t use psionic powers: evidence and theories)
Psycho Killer, Qu'est-ce Que C'est? (Neither Henry Nor Vecna Are Psychopaths: An In-Depth Behavioral Analysis)
Our Lord and Savior…Vecna? (Why Vecna/One is God, Based On Analysis Of ST4, The Bible, And Other Supporting Media)
The Very Special Easter of 1959 (The Order of Creel-Related Events As Compared To The Catholic Calendar. Read: More Proof That One Is God)
Fics:
Paper Faces — POTO x ST fusion fic (Complete)
ptolemaea (blessed be the children) — Henry’s fix-it fic (4/?)
Trick of the Light — Henry-Brenner-El centric 4.07 rewrite (2/3)
Papa Warbucks — Henry/Brenner Sugar Daddy AU (1/?)
Edits:
ABBEY (ft. Henry Creel)
NYMPHOLOGY (ft. HNL)
The Colors of ST4 (ft. Le Monde)
⬇️ Link Library Below The Cut ⬇️
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Featured Posts
↳ Featured Timeline, Time Loop, and Alternate Reality Posts
Jekyll and Hyde? No. Vecna and Mindflayer Guy
Closet Guy is not one of the Massacre Guys
The Creel’s Impossible Move-In Date
A Night of Monologues: Scripted vs Filmed 4.07
Plinko Power: A Theory on One’s Time Powers
010's Multiple Testing Rooms
El's Eye Blood
Day and Night: 4.07 Script Discrepancies vs 6 Nov. 1983
Covered in Blood: The Massacre may have happened in 1983
Gravity Goofs: Concrete proof of multiple UDs
Brenner's Tie Gaffs (cont.)
↳ Featured Henry Posts
Psychopathy: Learned or Genetic
Jeffty is Five, Henry is 7
Henry's Third Monologue Iteration
Mothergate Origins
Room (2015)
Young Henry, Adult Henry, and the Rabbit Scene
Perspective On The Length of Henry's Imprisonment
Henry Didn't Manipulate El Re: Soteria
Henry's Unseen Costumes
NINA And Computers
↳ Featured TFS Posts
The Real Time Frame of TFS
Drugs, NINA, The Mindflayer, and TFS
Henry, Bob's D.A.D., and Understudy Incest
Patty’s Anti-Social Behavior
Daria Rip-Off
Some Concerns About Joyce’s Role
↳ Featured Supporting Media Posts
Midnight Mass: My Dead Sister, Alice
Midnight Mass: Rabbits, Mice, and Resurrection
Fringe: Chess and A Brave New World
Fringe: Stranger Things Have Happened
↳ Featured Radiationgate Posts
Eben Byers, Radium, and ST3's Soviet Plot
Vecna's Curse: Radiation Sickness Symptoms
Henry Creel Literally Nuked Hawkins
Nuclear Winter in the Side-Side Upside Down
The Nuclear Annihilation of 1983
↳ Featured Phantomgate Posts
POTO 2004: Film Analysis
Anon Cringe Compilation: 2024 Edition, Part 1
LINK TO MY LIBRARY OF POSTS
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Other Edits:
Henry Creel: Brainless Borzoi
Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve (ft. Henry Creel)
Left-Brain, Right-Brain (ft. Henry Creel)
Art:
Creel Siblings Outfit Swap
Creelarke Aesthetic Board
TUNNEL VISION (ft. Henry Creel)
Other Social Media:
Twitter
Mastodon
Cohost
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wetcatspellcaster · 2 months ago
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i can't believe beloved Serverity is in Cooler than Me! Crossing my fingers to watch Verity appear.
who is doing background checks on Rosalie, they are atrocious and most reminiscent of what happens in real life ...
I have a passion for Astarion's hair styles so I'm very glad Rosalie shares this passion throughout all 6 ratboi seasons. It's very nice to have my interests be represented.
Its also so nice that in every universe that Astarion has prepared a speech, it does not go well, viz, Chapter 2 I was thinking what on earth is BGU and then I was like aha Baldurs Gate University and then aha of course Rosalie would just say BGU.
I'm absolutely crying in my pajyamas thinking of Astarion reaching for a non existent phone and Rosalie's first reaction to be "his acting, really on the down trend"
I called the "Astarion only hired Rosalie because she was search result no 2" right when Rosalie thought silently that he was wrong about the 3 papers and a book. Extremely pleased that my short mental exercise paid off!
I'm so in love with the fic. I've known Astarion and Rosalie for so long, and yet when I'm reading them in CTM, it feels like wholly Individual People who I've never met before and that I'm dying to get to know.
Its so fantastic that Astarion is starting out thinking that ah this girl doesn't give two figs about me does she, and meanwhile, Rosalie, is just here, dying, absolutely, hand over fist in water.
I hope you like recieving this sort of comments! I'd love to know if there's any pattern of comments you'd like to recieve as an author (e.g. incoherent yelling, intelligent analysis)
Hey! I love all asks/comments, and have no requirements of them except that they were fun for the sender to send! I'm not about to make demands of the things people voluntarily send me lol.
1. Verity will appear (so will Tara!)
2. Vis a vis, "Astarion thinks this girl doesnt give two shits about him and shes there having a silent internal meltdown...." It's going to get so much worse. Joining the war on autism, on the side of autism. What if masking was evil, actually?
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rojaceartandgaming · 8 months ago
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Hello IEYTD fandom, I know I'm not much of someone who... participates much. I lurk, I drop in to throw an ieytd fic at y'all and put Jackson through more hell, but... I have a legitimate question. Please don't be mad if I am out of line, but I'm genuinely confused as someone who is a storyteller himself and is learning game design in college. This leads me into another point here-
This will go into game and story analysis!
I'll admit most of my questions are rhetorical, so as rude as I may accidentally sound... I want to have a genuine discussion about this fandom, and I am coming in as a third party who doesn't partake in anything here really other then loving people's fanfiction and art. I watch, I listen, and yet... I am utterly exhausted and kind of frustrated with the state of this fandom as a mostly outside observer.
So, I'm legitimately just putting these questions out there to get them off my mind, and I really don't have the energy to partake in any arguments. I am not looking for any arguments like "well I don't think so" or "I don't see that." I have been here silently watching and yet what I shall bring up has stood out to me near-constantly.
Why is there just... such blatant mischaracterization in this fandom? And why, furthermore, are people so... shocked that people enjoy villainous characters? And even furthermore.... why are people constantly dumbing down antagonists? As a writer myself, I often constantly find myself mentally praising Schell on this amazing trilogy of games. Especially because 99.9 percent of the characters are villains. A hero is only as good as their villain - that is a crucial part of video game development. Of storytelling as a whole.
I am studying game design. Actively going to college for this.
I have been reading and consuming and analyzing fiction since I was a kid.
I've been working on an RPG for the past three years, my passion project.
No matter if you're reading a story, watching a movie, or in this case playing a video game, this is a fundamental concept. A hero is only as good as their villain. That is what makes us root for a hero. A villain has to be menacing, a threat to the main hero, needs to be compelling, and furthermore most of the time needs to be understandable. A villain that you can see exactly how they got to that point and can kind of empathize with that is a well written villain.
Being able to see or analyze how a villain got to that point is not excusing their bad actions or ignoring that a character is a bad guy.
That is someone critically analyzing a character and enjoying their arc. And furthermore, that is a testament to good writing.
Being able to understand exactly how a villain got to the point they're at makes them more terrifying.
Characters like Sephiroth (honestly most Final Fantasy antagonists, really), the Dead Three's Chosen from Baldur's Gate, basically every villain from Splatoon, Count Bleck from Super Paper Mario and so much more are not beloved characters just because they're just like, considered hot (idk fandoms be wild) or blorboified (is that even a term?).
They're loved because they are genuine threats who have such depth to their character and are interesting because they are villains. And furthermore, vanquishing or going against these villains feels important because they have depth. Because they can be analyzed.
That's what I love about IEYTD as both a gamer, and a storyteller myself. The Phoenix is a complete blank slate. The Phoenix is a player insert. That is not a personal stance. That is an intentional game mechanic. That is not a consequence of IEYTD being a VR game - many VR games have a proper named main character, even if they are a silent protagonist. The Phoenix is once again a blank slate for the player to project onto, and that is an intentional decision by Schell. This is how they wanted to tell their story. I love an oc-ified Phoenix as much as the the next person - I mean, look at Jackson - but the Phoenix is a literal blank slate. You cannot ignore that.
So how do you make a silent character with no appearance or voice interesting? How do you make the player care? Furthermore, how do you make the game feel rewarding?
You fill the game with a plethora of characters - primarily villains - that have enough character and drive that make the player feel good about overcoming the challenges and trials that come. That is just good game design.
Every single villain - from someone who barely gets any mention like Daniel Sans, to major, major villains like Solaris, Juniper, and Prism, to even a villain who we don't know shit about like Zor - is a menacing force. Overcoming the obstacles that are sent your way leads to a rewarding game play loop where you, the player, actually give a shit about the story, the world, the villains, and the player insert of the Phoenix themselves.
There is so much to every single villain that one can pick apart, that it becomes insulting to the characters and honestly to Schell's writers when you reduce their characters to just "a girlboss who kills people" (Fabricator) or "a whiny bitch of a privileged asshole" (Juniper) or "just a silly guy who likes bees" (Hivemind) or "she didn't do anything wrong, she was just manipulated" (Prism).
Even the most minor of a villain in this game has so, so many layers you could pick apart and analyze and... so many people in this fandom all but Flanderize them. It almost feels like people in this fandom cannot grasp the concept of characters being multifaceted.
And even more, that they cannot imagine liking a villain even though they are a villain.
This is a trend that I've seen a lot within fandom recently and... it's something I don't get. Writing a character who is a terrible person (and liking said character) does not make someone a terrible person. That is something that people do not seem to get nowadays thanks to likely lack of media literacy and... it kind of kills me a little bit as someone who analyzes so many types of media and is working on a story driven RPG, and once again is going to college for game design.
A character who is flawed is believable. No realistic character is infallible.
John Juniper is prone to anger, he is a man who is egotistical, arrogant, and a bit of a prick. However, these bad traits of his were likely preyed upon by Zoraxis and he became worse because of that. I am not saying he did no wrong, I am saying that you have to acknowledge that he is multifaceted.
The Fabricator has a fair bit of flair too, but to reduce her to just a quote-en-quote girlboss ignores her work. She makes Saw-esque death traps and delights in the pain and ultimately death her traps make.
Hivemind delights in killing people with literal bee stings. Think about that, think of how brutal of a death that would be. The average adult can withstand over one-thousand bee stings, or approximately ten stings per pound. And he laughs about it.
Prism knew what she was getting into, and hearing people say she did nothing wrong is... confusing. She worked for the EOD. She knew who Zor was. She knew what they would do. It is no secret that they regularly backstab their own employees. Zoraxis elite have a target on their back from their own employer. Prism likely knew that, and yet worked for them anyways. Yes, she helps the Phoenix in the end. But that is the culmination of her arc. You have to acknowledge that.
These are but a few examples - I am not going into full rants about every single character. I have an essay due on Sunday, I need some of my sanity left. But I feel like this had to be said.
To reduce these characters to Flanderized versions of themselves is to almost insult the writing in these games. To insult the very complexity and depth and thought that was put into these characters. And as a lover of story driven media who often analyzes - occasionally over-analyzing - these sorts of games for fun, and is aspiring to complete a story driven RPG with hopefully in-depth villains.... it is simply saddening to witness.
I felt this had to be said, thank you for your time if you read this. I now hopefully should have some peace of mind for the time being.
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aesethewitch · 7 months ago
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Hey friend 👋 I just stumbled across your ghost analysis post and was intrigued, and saw that you do tarot readings?
I recently began looking into tarot, but the two decks I have aren't traditional ones, but I've read from a lot of people that traditional tarot decks are the (only?) way to go. I'm curious about your journey in learn to interpret the deck(s) you have, since I'm also struggling with that.
I also see that you have a free tarot reading Friday, and since it IS Friday, I'd like to ask- how can I overcome the political and religious obstacles that force me to hide?
(if this is a question that isn't so suited for tarot, that's my bad)
-SC
Hey there! (:
So, anyone who tells you there's only One Right Way to do something is full of shit. Folks just like to feel superior for doing things More Correctly Than You.
You can use whatever for divination and get solid results. You could make a functioning system out of coupons. Hell, you could doodle on printer paper, cut it into squares, and then use it as a tarot deck. That would probably work, as long as you understood what the pictures meant.
Some folks have an easier time with traditional decks, others don't. I tend to vibe with decks that are a little funky. Extra cards, different suits, interesting presentations, etc.
The deck I use most often, the Alleyman's Tarot, is technically not a tarot deck at all -- it's an oracle deck, since it doesn't follow the "traditional" composition of a tarot deck (major arcana + minor arcana). But I still call it a tarot deck because I can and I use it like one. It works great.
I do have the Deviant Moon Tarot, which is based on the Rider-Waite-Smith, and it would be considered a "traditional" kind of deck. It's a great deck, and it's the one I taught myself to read with many years ago.
When I got that deck, I believed that someone else had to buy tarot decks for you; it was "selfish" and would "taint" the deck's power if you bought it yourself. Also bullshit, by the way, but I had that belief in me. A kind lady overheard me lamenting and pining for the Deviant Moon in a bookstore, bought me a gift card, and gave it to me with a note telling me to buy the deck for myself. It was a life-defining moment for me, to be sure, and one that sticks with me today. I strive to live up to that kindness.
Learning was an interesting thing. I didn't look up any spreads, and I barely used the book. Mostly, I just wanted to look like I knew what I was doing right out the gate (I didn't; I was 18 and had self-image issues, lmao). So I taught myself to interpret based on vibes and imagery, then went back to reference the book when I really needed to. It helped that I had a spirit ally hanging around that was looking for a vessel; it's still attached to those cards to this day, and it helped me learn how to hone my abilities. For a long time, the act of pretending I knew what I was talking about prevented me from actually learning much at all.
It isn't... well, it isn't great advice. I wouldn't recommend "learning" tarot the way I did. I figured it out after a while, but there was no real system to it. If I could go back and relearn it the way I would do it now, I absolutely would. Here's what I've learned is a fairly good method for learning any new tarot deck:
Shuffle the cards and lay the pile face-down.
Draw the top card.
In a notebook, write down your immediate, knee-jerk impressions of the card. I recommend just key words or single sentences.
Then, take a closer look at it. Note the colors, positioning of figures, background imagery, and other details. Write down what you see, not how you would interpret it.
Now interpret. Take your time writing down how the card's specific imagery makes you feel. What does it remind you of?
Jot down an example question and how you would apply the card to the answer. For example, the question "What do I need to know right now?" answered by Temperance could be something like: "Patience is a virtue. Take your time." Or however you would interpret that.
Set the card aside. Repeat until the entire deck is done.
Congrats! Now, you have a general idea of the entire deck's meanings and a handy guide to help you remember what they mean to you.
Bonus step: Review periodically. Opinions and interpretations change as you do.
I follow this routine with every new deck I get. I've figured out that the same card in two different decks could have vastly different meanings, depending on how it's depicted. It's really cool!
Also, it's kind of important to note that I'm not really a full animist. I don't think that tarot decks (or other tools) have individual spirits. My Deviant Moon deck has one, but that's because of the ally I mentioned before. The Alleyman's deck doesn't have a spirit as far as I can tell. I've got spirits hanging around that enjoy assisting with divination and magic and such, though.
As for free tarot, it's closed for now! The update reblog was sent to my drafts instead of posting,,, sorry about that!! Your question would definitely be fine for tarot interpretations (though a little shallow with only one card; situations like that are typically better interpreted with more cards I've found). I do open it up every Friday, though, so feel free to stick around and send another next week! (: (Or visit my Ko-Fi linked in my pinned post if you want a more in-depth paid reading! /shilling)
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nebulablakemurphy · 1 year ago
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Through Love And By Love (Pt. 17)
Summary: Twenty-Two years ago, Draco Malfoy used the imperius curse to slow Voldemort’s rise to power. No good deed goes unpunished. Warning: this series contains mature subject matter surrounding use of the imperius curse (dub-con), discussions of trauma and mental illness; reader discretion advised.
Part 16
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Lucius has a few theories, as to why Rabastan might be interested in his daughter-in-law, but they will require further analysis to determine which is his true motive. “I’d like you to try something.”
“Sure,” Rosanna nods.
Lucius returns the gesture before handing her a blank piece of parchment. “Keep hold of this, as best you can.”
“With magic?”
Lucius narrows his eyes, “yes, darling girl, with magic.”
Draco widens his stance, trying to figure out what his father is playing at.
“Now Draco, try to take it from her.” Lucius instructs.
“No.” Draco clenches his jaw.
“For Salazar’s sake, the only thing you will hurt is her ego.” If it were more than that, he wouldn’t be asking.
“She is very sweet, Draco.” The dark lord purrs. He would, from time to time, inspect Draco’s mind to be sure he was ‘performing’ to the best of his abilities.
“Yes, my lord.” Keep her image out of your wretched mind.
“However, she is not yet with child.” Voldemort croons, pacing leisurely about the room.
“I assure you, it is not for lack of trying.”
Voldemort releases a sound that could almost be a laugh, if not for its demented nature. “Alternative methods may be necessary in order for her to reproduce with someone of your pedigree.”
“Of course, my lord.” Draco bites his tongue.
“This will surely aid in conception.” Voldemort says, producing a box from thin air. A pink ribbon lies in wait, enchanted with the most powerful fertility charms known to man. Something pretty for him to look at.
Draco nods, “thank you, my lord.”
“Do enjoy her, Draco.” Voldemort is taunting him now, seeing how far he can push, before Draco snaps.
With that he is excused.
He returns to his room with the box, finding Rosanna perched on top of the bed, reading. Under the imperius curse, his only requirements of her are to do whatever she likes and to say what she feels. If something bothers her, he needs to know in order to fix it.
“I want to go outside.” She tells him, almost immediately.
“Alright, we’ll go for a walk around the grounds, after a while.” He kicks off his shoes.
“I want to go outside the gate.”
Draco sighs, “I’m sorry, sweetheart. It’s not safe for you, remember how I told you?”
“I’ll be good.” Rosanna promises.
Draco’s knees buckle, all of the air leaving his lungs. She thinks she can’t go outside because of something she’s done. “You are good, Rosanna. You’re so good. This is not a punishment, darling. Only to keep you safe. I thought you knew that. I apologize for not making it clear.”
“Why are you upset?”
Draco swallows down his guilt, moving to sit behind her on the bed. “I’ll tell you a story.” He says, delicately gathering her hair at the nape of her neck and tying the bow in place. “Once upon a time there was a girl; she was an angel. She was wild and free, until she met a boy who wasn’t an angel. He loved her wings, but it wasn’t safe for her to fly, so he couldn’t let her use them for a little while. But only for a little while.”
Draco comes back to himself, blood boiling, “have I not taken enough from her?” He roars, causing his father to take a step back, raising his hands.
“Draco, I’m only trying to help.” Lucius reminds him. He hasn’t seen his son this way in years. Lucius is not a fool, he knows that Draco has suffered his fair share, in the name of love. Somehow it’s still jarring to see such a visceral reaction, after all these years, over a piece of parchment.
Rosanna sets the paper aside, closing the distance between herself and her husband, rubbing circles along his back to soothe him. His eyes find hers, haunted and desperate. His mind far away from his body. “It’s ok, I’m ok.”
Draco grabs her then, crushing her to him, one hand snakes up to the nape of her neck, fisting in the hair there. “I’m sorry.”
“It’s ok, Draco. Everything is ok, I promise.” She shakes her head, “you’re all that matters to me. We don’t have to do this.”
The light is around them then, soft and glowing, keeping them together and safe.
“Your magic is enmeshed.” Lucius realizes, straight away. “There is a reason that Leo is the only child ever born of an imperius curse, it isn’t possible. Not only have you muddled in dark magic and created life, you’ve bound yourselves together in every way a witch and wizard can. Now that her magic serves you, anytime Rosanna tries to use an amount of power that your magic deems dangerous, it will try to stop her. Imagine hitting a brick wall, but she’s stubborn. She heads back at the wall, with a running start and as a result she is met with further resistance.”
“How do we stop it?” Draco asks.
Lucius sighs, “there are times we must lie in the bed we’ve made. She can no longer over extend herself. A few examples might be, shattering an imperius curse, her stunt on the stairs, at Hogwarts with Nagini, performing advanced legillimacy on a member of a family she is bound to, scrying for someone across time and space.”
Rosanna turns back to Draco, he blinks at her, opening his mouth to speak. “It’s ok, Draco.”
“No, it is not ok,” Draco sneers. “I am tired of having to be the one who takes things from you. I won’t do it anymore, Rosanna, I can’t.”
“Please don’t do this, don’t blame yourself.” Don’t let this eat at your soul, like all the other things you did trying to save mine.
“Is it only you who has the luxury of hating yourself?”
“I have good reason-”
“As do I,” his eyes are cold, sharp like daggers.
“I love you.” Rosanna tells him, the same way he does, each time her self loathing bubbles out. It feels silly to say it, surely he knows. It is love that brought them here, love that turned them into this and it can’t save them now.
“Through love and by love castles will crumble.” Draco says, bitterly. “We should have heeded the warning.” With that he turns and takes his leave, it hurts to look at her.
“Please,” Rosanna follows him out into the hallway. “Draco, I can live without the things I lost.”
He pauses, no more determined strides away from her.
“I can’t live without you, please. Take anything else, just don’t take yourself away from me.”
She’s begging now…please after please. “I need a moment. Can you give me that?”
A moment. A moment away from her. “Yes.”
“This isn’t a punishment, Rosanna. I need you to understand that. I love you.” I love you too much.
With that he is gone, disapparating into thin air.
Lucius joins his daughter-in-law in the hallway, “Narcissa and I always hoped the two of you would grow out of this.”
Rosanna swipes traitorous tears from her cheeks, “sorry to disappoint.”
————————————————————————
The children in school have returned to Hogwarts, under special supervision. Leaving only Rosanna and Corina in the manor, upstairs in her playroom. The little girl is stacking blocks, wailing and flickering the lights when they tumble over.
“No lights, Corina.” Rosanna reminds her.
“Mummy, it’s broken.”
“Can I help you fix it?” She hadn’t allowed her to touch it a moment ago.
“Uh huh.” The two year old nods.
Rosanna criss crosses her legs on the floor, taking one of the larger blocks to start building a foundation. “Should we build a castle?”
“Yes.”
“Thank you for using your words.” Rosanna smiles.
“I’m a big girl.” Corina says, handing her mother a new block of choice.
“Yes, you are. I’m so proud of you.” The swift pop of apparition draws Rosanna’s attention.
“Daddy!” Corina makes a beeline for him.
“Hello, my darling girl.” Draco takes her into his arms, as if nothing has happened, as if he hasn’t been gone for hours.
“Oh good, you’re here.” Rosanna deadpans.
“I meant to return sooner, but Potter called for me.” Draco explains, his tone clipped.
“Harry called for you?”
“We are partners, Rosanna. It happens on occasion.”
“What for?”
“Nothing to worry about, it’s being handled.”
She scoffs. How dare you? How dare you disappear, how dare you withhold information? Rosanna moves to stand, starting towards the door.
“Where are you going?” Draco is there, blocking her path, Corina still in his arms.
“To see Harry.” She begins skirting around him.
“Why?” Draco moves again to stop her.
“Because you’re not going to tell me.”
“I never said I wouldn’t tell you.”
“Then tell me.”
“We’re closing in on a suspect we believe may have leaked the files.” He explains.
“Is that all?”
“Yes, sweetheart.” He softens, marginally.
“Why didn’t you start with that?”
“I apologize, I wasn’t thinking straight. I just wanted to see you.” He’s come to her without his bearings.
“I’m sorry,” Rosanna apologizes, he’s doing exactly what she asked him to. “I didn’t realize.”
“It’s alright.” Draco assures her, “have you had dinner?”
“No, not yet.” The question is too simple, mundane.
“Would you join me? And Corina, of course.” He nods to their daughter.
“Yeah, that’d be great. Should we change?” Rosanna looks down at herself, jeans and a t-shirt. She hadn’t planned on leaving their estate, as for Corina, she plays hard, her romper is evidence of that.
Draco moves his eyes down the length of her, in his perfectly pressed suit, as if the thought hadn’t occurred to him. “If you’d like. I’ll take care of her, you go on.”
“Ok,” Rosanna side steps him again and this time he allows it. Kissing his cheek once, in parting.
“I love you.” He tells her. “I love you terribly.”
————————————————————————
A night out in muggle London is good for them, laughing and talking for hours, in the booth of their favorite Italian restaurant.
“We should get out of here,” Rosanna says, realizing the time, “I’m sure other people would like to have dinner too.”
“I’ve reserved this room for the rest of the night, there’s no need to rush.”
Rosanna nods, taking another sip from her wine. “Of course you did, why wouldn’t Draco Malfoy rent out an entire restaurant for dinner?”
“You’re worth much more than that,” Draco reminds her. He’d give her the moon if she wanted it.
Corina is clanking two spoons together, “on mummy’s nose.” She holds one out to Rosanna.
Rosanna takes the silverware, “let’s see.” She releases a puff of warm air onto the inside of the spoon, before attempting to balance it on her nose. It sticks after the second try. “Here we go.”
“On my mummy’s nose.” Corina rejoices, clapping her hand together.
“Your mummy is silly, isn’t she?” Draco grins.
“On daddy’s nose.” Corina holds out the second spoon to him.
“Oh,” Draco accepts the utensil from her, “how do I-”
“Just let your breath hit the inside and then try to stick it to your nose.”
“Easier said than done.” It takes several tries.
“You did it, daddy!”
Draco smiles, like he’s won an award.
“High five,” Rosanna extends her arm across the table carefully, still balancing the spoon.
————————————————————————-
Corina is asleep the moment her head hits the pillow. They were out well after her bedtime. Rosanna closes her daughter’s door behind her and makes her way down the hall.
On the table, outside their bedroom, is a crystal vase with pink roses. She plucks the card off the top.
-You look ravishing tonight, Mrs. Malfoy.
Rosanna leans forward, taking a whiff from the arrangement. They smell amazing, better than anything she’s ever smelt. Draco must have enchanted them with something.
She keeps moving, knowing he’ll be waiting for her inside. He’s dressed in silk, emerald green, pajamas. The Slytherin Prince.
A slow grin spreads across her lips as she crosses the room to him. “Unzip?”
Draco turns her away, now facing the long mirror against the wall.
He told her once it may as well be the mirror of Erised. He only sees her in it, the deepest, most desperate desire of his heart. Then he’d made love to her, in front of it, until she was sure her fingers had cracked the edges.
Draco slides the zipper down to the small of her back with care. The dimples at the base of her spine peeking out from above her knickers.
“Thank you for the flowers,” Rosanna breathes. As he uncoils her hair, letting it fall wildly about her shoulders.
“What flowers?” Draco presses a kiss to the base of her neck.
“The ones in the hall.”
“Sweetheart, I didn’t leave you flowers.” Another kiss, this time behind her ear.
“They smelled so good,” Rosanna drawls, her mind is fuzzy, “they smelled like you.” She watches his expression shift, in the mirror. Her legs are made of jelly and he’s the only thing keeping her upright.
“Tell me more about the flowers, Ro.”
“There was a note but- I don’t… I can’t remember.” It startles her, enough that she begins struggling in his hold. Why can’t she remember?
“Shhh, I’ve got you.” Draco soothes, shuffling her toward the bed.
Her dress is gone and he slips a night gown over her head. “My head hurts.”
“Try to relax, I’m running a diagnostic charm.” Draco has his wand held over her. Hands trembling as he hurries to make sense of this.
There’s something she needs, someone depending on her. “Where’s the baby?”
“I’ll get Corina. Don’t move, I’ll be right back.”
Something is falling; dripping, metallic and thick into her mouth. She brings a hand up to wipe it away, blinking at her fingers. It’s blood, her blood. “Draco?”
“You look ravishing tonight, Mrs. Malfoy.” A voice from above her murmurs.
Not Draco, not any voice she can place. Everything goes black.
Part 18
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not-terezi-pyrope · 6 months ago
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How did you get into AI (and maybe compsci more generally)? I'm curious in part to know more about your background, but also because I'm interested in getting into it as well
Huh, big question.
Well, I got into compsci via programming and pretty young. I mean, I was always interested in computers as that's the field my dad works in and his excitement for games and hardware transferred. I was particularly into source engine games from his influence, which lead to me being super obsessed with Garry's Mod when I was 10, and when I was 11-12 ish I discovered the "wiremod" logic mod for that, and was instantly entranced building robots and mini-computers in game. Initially that was by hooking up discrete logic gates, but then I discovered that there was an entire full-featured programming language built into the mod as well, and teaching myself that while playing the game after school was how I learned to program.
I wanted to take that to some non-gmod contexts as well, and so I learned a bit of Java via "Greenfoot", which was/is(?) a library and web community for building little 2D Java games, popular with kids and teens. I actually won an iPod in a Greenfoot coding contest when I was 13. I carried that interest in programming through school, where I did computer science at GCSE and AS levels, then after a brief foray at studying film for less than 6 months, picked up programming as a proper hobby again when I was 19, and went to do a Computer Science degree because I was transparently so much better at programming than I was any of my arts stuff, lol. It's uniquely compelling and fits right in my brain the way nothing else does.
The AI interest mostly comes from fiction, again from pretty young. Portal (another source engine game) was one of my favourite games as a teenager, and I spent a while in Garry's Mod building my own automatons and autonomous robots, and creating wiremod bots that could talk in chat, respond to commands, do some basic statistical language analysis, pretty much figuring it out just off the top of my head.
That interest in artificial intelligence lead to me following the field pretty loosely for a while, and I discovered transhumanist thought in my late teens, and was interested in simulating cognition more specifically as it related to subjects like mind uploads, but I didn't get super into AI as a discipline until I discovered the first online GPT-2 demo in 2018 and read the associated papers. I was like, "oh, fuck. This is like nothing we've ever had before, this is going to change the world, I am fascinated by this and I should try to get in on this now". That lead to me focusing on AI for my undergraduate thesis and then later for my master's degree. I would be working in AI now, if I hadn't entirely failed to find any good roles, and also, if I am honest, if the online conversation around and backlash to LLMs and so forth hadn't soured a lot of my initial enthusiasm, which makes it hard to stay fully up to date with the field. My current job is more general IT work with some programming sprinkled in.
Because the sad thing is I was absolutely right, three years before anyone outside of computer science noticed, in predicting that attention transformers were going to completely upend the tech field and how we interact with computers. What I got wrong in my naivety was thinking that people would respond to that in a good way. Instead it's mostly been distrust and revulsion, which in some respects is understandable, and in others is really sad, especially given the potential that was and is still there. But I worry that this idea that AI is the domain of conniving capitalist techbros is fast becoming a self-fulfilling prophecy as everyone who genuinely cares about social issues (I count myself among them) is driven by an almost overwhelming tide to divest themselves from anything that has the whiff of a neural net about it.
I am at least partially resisting for now.
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therainscene · 2 years ago
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I’m still swishing the time travel theories around in my head -- we Bylers enjoy letting ourselves get distracted by the beautiful queer coming-of-age romance, but the sci-fi plot is important too! -- but I do want to address some common misconceptions I’ve seen floating about in the wake of the Stranger Writers’ A Wrinkle in Time tweet.
(Disclaimer: This post is NOT a criticism of anyone who’s using A Wrinkle in Time as a springboard for S5 speculation; it’s just an explanation of how extra-dimensionality works as a general concept, divorced from any work of fiction that’s employing it as a metaphor or plot device. That said, I’m not a mathematician or a physicist, so take this all with a grain of salt.)
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We sometimes refer to extra-dimensional realms such as the Upside Down as “dimensions”, but strictly speaking, dimensions are not themselves alternate realms (or universes, as I’m henceforth going to be calling them for the sake of brevity) -- they’re a property of universes.
A dimension can be thought of as a line, or a single axis on a graph.
Our universe consists of three spacial dimensions (up/down, left/right, back/forth), and one temporal dimension (past/future).
Imagine a universe with two spacial dimensions that exists upon the surface of a piece of paper:
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The arrows indicate the freedom of movement our 2D friend has: they can move in the green directions of left, right, back, and forth, but they can’t travel in the red directions of up and down. Indeed, up and down are utterly alien concepts to them: they can’t see or even imagine the reverse side of the page, the table upon which it sits, or you looming ominously above them.
If you were to place a cube on the page, all they would see is a square magically popping into existence.
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A square can be thought of as a 2-dimensional cube. 4-dimensional cubes exist too; they’re called tesseracts. If a 4-dimensional alien were to place a tesseract atop our 3-dimensional universe, we would see a normal cube magically pop into existence. Tesseracts are great illustrations of extra-dimensionality, which is probably why A Wrinkle in Time and other stories tend to use them as metaphors for extra-dimensional travel -- but objectively, they’re just ordinary shapes like squares and cubes.
Now imagine you have an entire stack of papers, each of which contains a 2-dimensional universe. Again, our 2D friend has no way of perceiving any of the other pages.
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But while our friend may not be able to perceive these other universes or travel to them under ordinary circumstances, they can cheat by creating a hole or bridge that enables them to make a 2D journey through the third dimension:
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Likewise, the gates in Stranger Things enable the characters to make a 3D journey through the fourth dimension in order to access the Upside Down.
So far these examples have only dealt with spacial dimensions, but the same principle can theoretically also apply to travel across time -- time is just another dimension, after all. In the below illustration, each page represents not a different universe, but the same universe at different points in time:
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There are lots of ways to model time travel in fiction, and this is only one of them.
Here’s an interesting alternative: let’s say another universe is identical to ours in every way, but which is positioned such that its time dimension isn’t perfectly aligned with ours.
Travel to that universe would thus take the appearance of time travel without inheriting any of the usual causality problems that tend to come with time travel -- once you’re done fucking with the past in universe B, just jump back through the portal and return to universe A and its pristine history:
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This isn’t too dissimilar to what we saw Nancy figure out about the Upside Down in S4. Could this be what Henry (or even Will?) has been doing? Hm, maybe... but that’s for another analysis.
There’s no guarantee that any of this is actually how extra-dimensional travel works in Stranger Things -- it’s a work of fiction and the writers can make up whatever rules they like. But Mr. Clarke’s flea and acrobat explanation does seem consistent with what I’ve described, so I think this is a solid starting point for S5 speculation.
Regardless, I hope this made sense and helped clear things up for anyone who’s been struggling to wrap their mind around this concept!
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texasdreamer01 · 6 months ago
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Atlantis Expedition: Science Division Departments - Applied Sciences Department
The last of the science departments! Previously were the medical, life, and field sciences.
Below are the original notes, with one (1) revision:
Applied Sciences Department
> Head: Rodney McKay Radek Zelenka > Contains: Electrical/technical engineering, nuclear physics, civil engineering, astrophysics, laser/optical, chemical engineering > Function: Study, synthesis, and adaptations of Ancient technology > Examples of function: ZPM analysis with intent to duplicate, experimental duplications of Ancient technology materials, study of gate physics and construction with intent to duplicate, study and experimental duplication of other Ancient technologies (i.e. hyperdrives, cloaks, weapons, etc) > Personnel quantity: 1 (Head) + 3 (electreng) + 6 (techeng/gate techs) + 1 (nucphys) + 1 (astrophy) + 1 (LZ/opt) +  3 (chemeng) = 16 > A/N: The people Rodney are yelling at most often, because mistakes mean kablooey. Also a lot of the people running around in an emergency. 1 nuclear physicist because Rodney pulls a lot of intellectual weight, and same with the astrophysicist and laser/optical person (mostly they're there as on-paper hires and back-ups/assistants for him for his own research).
Revision because I do believe Radek would be in charge of a department, and this neatly explains why Radek is so often Rodney's functional second-in-command as well as the way they interact on a professional level.
Excepting the physicists (nuclear and astro), everyone here is an engineer or engineering-adjacent (see: gate techs).
Here's the breakdown, commentary included:
> Electrical Engineering  » 3x of these  » Specialties   ⇛ Computer engineering    ⟹ Hardware, software, computer architecture, computer design, robotics    ⟹ Makes the databases, and also things like MALPs   ⇛ Microelectronics    ⟹ Study of and fabrication of microelectronics     ⭆ The bits and bobs that make electronics    ⟹ Semiconductor-adjacent work   ⇛ Electronic engineering    ⟹ Designs communication and instrumentation devices     ⭆ Database architecture, signals between devices, etc  » Outline of electrical engineering > Technical Engineering/Gate Technicians  » SGC imports  » 6x of these   ⇛ Duties    ⟹ Drafting of technical drawings    ⟹ Gate address memorization and log maintenance    ⟹ Mission log maintenance    ⟹ Gate repair and maintenance > Nuclear Physics  » Studies nuclear material and electron movements   ⇛ AKA power source analytics  » Also provides radiocarbon dating support to the Field Sciences team > Civil Engineering  » Job of idiot-proofing  » Studies the built world (infrastructure)  » Useful for planning things like sewage systems, bridges, etc  » Assists Field Sciences department with infrastructure design based on their feedback > Astrophysics  » Does labwork and goes ooh at the telescope(s)  » Analyzes data from telescopes and constructs planetary profiles and other celestial data  » Assists with compilation of data from Field Sciences department > Laser/Optical  » Creates, maintains, and compiles information from laser-based optical devices  » Works with electrical engineers for development of new tools  » Assists astrophysicist(s) with developing specialized tools for planetary analysis > Chemical Engineering  » 3x of these  » Slightly different role than the biochemical engineers in the Life Sciences department  » Specialties   ⇛ Materials science/Polymer engineering    ⟹ Research and creation of new materials     ⭆ Plastic-type and other malleable materials that aren't petrochemical-based   ⇛ Semiconductors    ⟹ Makes the semiconductors the other engineers are using    ⟹ Also researches new ways to make semiconductors from new materials   ⇛ Chemical process modeling    ⟹ Computer modelling of new production processes    ⟹ Primarily non-biologic chemicals and chemically-based outputs    ⟹ Assists civil engineer in production processes for infrastructure modelling    ⟹ The "fuck around and find out" person  » Outline of chemical engineering
These are the people that, except for the head of the expedition, are the ones that make an expedition possible. Studying Ancient technology? This is the department. Setting up all the technology that everyone will be using, down to having a copy of Solitaire saved and inventorying down to the amount of solder? Once again, these people. Outside of the military factor - of which I presume there will naturally be quite a bit of overlap - the Applied Sciences are the ones to, well, apply the science.
Electric engineers are... I suppose a popular preconception of them is programming, if not a mental image of soldering pieces onto a motherboard. Neither is entirely incorrect, but it misses the broader scope of their training, and that is the design and construction of computers and their accompanying software. Whether a computer be a database system (think a cloud, or a company's digital storage) or a microprocessor that allows a robot to be a robot, these are also the people that generally end up in charge of the security of all electronics (see: hacking). Rodney McKay, as the CSO, will likely be one of two people (the other being the head of the expedition) holding the ultimate keys to this, but they'll likely be some sort of system administrators to handle the day-to-day work.
Gate technicians, while trained on the operation and maintenance of the gate and gate system - not an easy task in the slightest, and requiring a degree of fluency in Ancient and Goa'uld! - also handle a lot of the miscellaneous work that this department needs. Another shout-out to @spurious for prompting this idea, because there does need to be a group of people who do technical drafting, and the logic follows that they would also maintain records related to the usage of the gate, such as gate addresses (places visited, no-go addresses), mission details (liaison with the Field Sciences on managing pre- and post-mission information on planets and inter-planetary relations), and in general keeping track of what's going on regarding the gate.
Nuclear physics is here as an applied, rather than theoretical, position, keeping in line with the goals of this department. Primarily they would do power source analytics, being well-equipped to study radiation and electron movements, and parse such information for review. They would be doing a lot of labwork, and running lots of simulations on things like decay rates and energy throughputs of radioactive materials and different types of nuclear-type energy productions/storage containers (for the purposes of this headcanon, ZPMs are being lumped into this category despite being a solid state energy that functionally is not radioactive - there is a reason why Rodney's considered a ZPM expert).
Civil engineering is there, quite literally, to idiot-proof. This is useful around a crowd of engineers, and they also act as a useful translator for military parlance if a completely civilian engineer or scientist is in this or another science department. If you need a toilet, or a bridge, or putting up electric lines, this is your go-to person.
An astrophysicist on hand to study things like star charts (figuring out where you are in the new galaxy, especially in relation to the old one) and where other stargate would actually, literally be based on the constellations used as chevrons. They would be making the new maps, as well as assisting the Field Sciences department in the analysis of planetary physics from a distanced perspective. Their work will also put them in close relation to the gate technicians because of the amount of overlap in duties.
Laser and optical engineering is going to be immensely useful for this expedition, because not only will they help with making sure the electronics work, they can help with maintaining that, as well the operation and analysis of light-based scientific equipment. Think spectrometers, electron microscopes, and the like. A lot of Ancient and Goa'uld-adapted technology is likely to be laser- and optical-based, so this type of engineer will be useful for reverse-engineering and general dummy-testing.
Chemical engineers will, indeed, fuck around and find out. They're a little different than the biochemical engineers in the Life Sciences department, in that they wouldn't be dealing with the formulation of biologics and the tools to create such materials. Rather, they would be figuring out ways to make the things that everything is made out of - primarily plastic alternatives and other petrochemical alternatives. This would include everything from computer housings to wire insulation to, probably, the wires themselves (think fiber optics). If you're looking for an archetypal mad scientist, here's where you'll find them.
Given how closely aligned this department is with not only the IOA's goals for the expedition, but also the SGC's, it would be safe to assume that the members of this department will have some sway over the other departments. This would, of course, fluctuate based on the need of the given subject, but everyone in this department would quickly adapt to becoming the main people to assist the CSO in figuring out, repairing, and maintaining Atlantis as a whole.
Total Applied Sciences Department Personnel
Head of department: 1
Engineers: 7
Gate technicians: 6
Physicists: 2
Total total: 16
I'll be going over canonical personnel like Radek Zelenka and Miko Kusanagi in their own posts, but for now this is a general accounting of the expedition’s applied sciences department.
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soft-doorwoman · 7 months ago
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Nacha walked up to the glass, a basket of pastries that smelled amazing in one of her hands. Her other hand held her ID and entry request, she slipped her papers into the slot alongside a fresh cookie wrapped in a little napkin.
“ good afternoon ! thought you might need a cookie (´。• ω •。`) with all of these doppelgängers running around, everyone deserves a treat ! ”
- @blubrrychef
(haha sorry if this is random, i’ve been feigning for a lil role play, feel free to ignore or delete if you don’t feel comfortable answering ! ^_^)
"Oh my,Nacha! It's good to see that you're fine,and thank you,you know how I love making baked goods, but really,they never can be compared to yours,one day you'll have to tell me your secret,hm?"
She smiles brightly, quickly checking your papers,she opens the gates when she finishes the analysis,happily accepting the cookie,she eats it with a soft hum, clearly loving your food
"Hmm! Good as always, really you made my day,oh,also I'm planning on making a pudding this evening, I'll separate some for you and Anastacha,of course"
(No need to say sorry,I love answering asks here,and role playing too, please, don't worry! Feel free to send me anything you want! <3)
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scattered-irises · 1 year ago
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The Spare and the Heir
This was written before the companion analysis paper but I had to type it up from its handwritten version.
Rating: General
Word Count: 1880
Characters: Christopher Arclight, Thomas Arclight
Warnings: Angst
Summary: After the World Duel Carnival, Thomas comes back to their childhood home to reflect.
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Once upon a time, there were two brothers. The oldest was raised with the highest of expectations. The finest tutors money could hire. The finest clothes tailored for his alabaster skin. From the moment he was born, the world was promised to him. Gazed upon with hope and admiration, the heir held the future in his hands. 
In his shadow was the spare, educated and clothed in a similar manner, yet held only an inkling of hope in his dark hands. The spare was a dubious being, only allowed to carry on his father’s name over the corpse of his older brother. While the heir lived, the spare picked at what the heir left behind, his fate no better than that of a carrion-crow. 
It had been tradition for centuries. 
Thomas knows this. Feels it in his bones, all the way to the marrow. The walls in their childhood home know this, banishing away all covetous aunts and uncles into the depths of oblivion. The wallpaper closes in on him as he walks down the halls alone, counting down the time he has left as a guest. Someday, he will be the shadowy Uncle Thomas, seen only on television and the austere holiday gatherings he knows Christopher will fetishistically uphold. 
If things between them don’t improve, Christopher will paint him as the convenient villain for his children. Behave, or else I’ll give away our estate to Uncle Thomas and his frightful children, warns the future Christopher to his own white-haired, blue-eyes offspring. Thomas scoffs. The perfect covetous spare and the righteous heir. 
It’s an archaic tradition, child mortality now an extremely rare occurrence. Of course, accidents are always bound to occur, but with the way Christopher lives, the most likely accident he’d have was being crushed to death by a heavy bookshelf. Or, he’d be sucked into a portal at the lab and disappear forever. Thomas didn’t really trust the latter, knowing how his father ended up returning. For all he knew, he could be sitting in the Arclight estate one day and a monstrous Christopher, armed with fifty tentacles and wings could show up at his door and demand the return of his birthright. 
Thomas should be kind though. 
Christopher couldn’t help his sedentary lifestyle. He had been encouraged to remain indoors growing up, lest a stranger snatched him away. The housestaff always had plenty of Arclight relatives to turn into monsters. Their father, with his penchant for drama, wasn’t particularly helpful in this regard either. Such childhood fears have calcified in Christopher’s being. His brother is content with his lifestyle of books and fortified walls, supposedly. Until Thomas remembers the pleading and begging his brother did to accompany their father on his adventures. Maybe Christopher did enjoy a little outing every once in a while. 
While Thomas…Thomas was quite free from the beginning. After his lessons alongside Christopher, he would always run outside and play with the dog. Sometimes, he’d even slip out the gates to play with the housestaff’s children. They would get in all sorts of mischief not befitting an Arclight, but Thomas never cared. Around those children, he was their equal, not some maligned appendage to his brother. 
Christopher never deigned to play with the children, preferring his books over any friends. He had derided the children as filthy and rowdy. The children had seen him as a haughty bore. Once, Thomas even saw Christopher glaring at him through the windows as he played marco polo with the chef’s son. At that time, he had thought he was being too loud. Now, he suspects that Christopher had been envious of Thomas’ freedom beneath the sun. 
Thomas opens the door to the ballroom and breathes in the cold, dusty air. The white marble staircase is covered in dust. The banister covers his sleeve in a light coating of gray as he descends. There is a draft blowing from somewhere. It’s a cavern of a room, every slight movement echoing throughout the dusty walls. The house seems to creak in displeasure, admonishing Thomas for coming to a place outside of his domain. After all, it was the heir’s duty to host parties.
Although their father attempted to treat his sons equally, he could always sense that Christopher was their father’s preferred son. Either that or the baby, Michael. Not exactly a spare, Michael was simply there. There were no rigid expectations for him, his future open and wide. With his sweet smile and gentle nature, the housestaff constantly indulged him in ways both Christopher and Thomas frowned at. Michael had often been allowed to skip his lessons and go to the museum instead, much to the brothers’ chagrin. 
There was a reason why he was two grades behind. 
Thomas will never admit it, but he knows that both him and Christopher were often envious of Michael. What was it like to live without rigid future expectations? The taste of freedom must have been intoxicating. 
Sometimes, Thomas wonders if Michael was the spare to the spare. If something had happened to Thomas, say, he ran away and eloped, would Michael have assumed his duties? Or, what if he and Christopher had both been killed in an accident? Would Michael then be the heir-apparent? What would happen if Michael died next? He doesn’t dwell on this thought too often, disliking the idea that his father saw both him and Christopher as replaceable. There had been enough of that during the WDC. 
Thomas looks out the window of the Arclight mansion’s ballroom. Their gardens had fallen into disuse, dead flowers scattered across the paths. His footsteps echo forlornly against the pink marble, a place where hundreds of footsteps had danced every month. With his father’s current state, he doubts that there will be any large gatherings soon. Unless…Christopher is declared the new Lord Arclight while their father whispers to him from the shadows.
He would be a puppet lord then, the previous Lord Arclight still in power. Thomas knows his brother would find no issue in this, his rigid upbringing instilling undying loyalty to his father. His brother is content with being controlled and jostled as long as his controller was their father or individuals acting under the name of their father. Sometimes, he wonders how Christopher doesn’t shatter from such a rigid lifestyle. 
Thomas looks back at the ballroom. The sun’s rays do little to light up the darkened exterior. The once-brilliant velvet curtains hanging from the large windows have been eaten through by moths, spreading speckled shadows across the floor. He sighs, dredging up a memory from the past. 
Once at one of his father’s parties, he was cornered by a group of bullies. They sneered at his swarthy skin and unkempt hair. He’s forgotten all of their names and faces. Most of their insults have been forgotten as well. Of course, he still occasionally has to deal with these slights, but it was what the bullies had said afterward that haunted him. 
“If Christopher were to ever be in an accident, Lord Arclight wouldn’t hesitate to cut you open for spare parts,” they whispered. 
Spare parts. That’s all he was. He hates it. Hates that word. Spare. Undesirable, leftover parts. Things only remembered or useful when the main part is gone. A poor substitute for the original. An afterthought. 
Which was why he leaped at the opportunity of becoming a duel champion. FInally, a chance to become something on his own. As the East Asia Duel Champion, he stood alone, owning the title with his own hands. It wasn’t something given to him by some contrived birth order lottery. 
In front of his adoring fans, he was a person. IV. A codename, but a name, nonetheless. He’s always had a complicated relationship with his real name. Thomas. It sounded so stiff. Whenever Christopher was upset with him, he’d always say his name as if he was spitting out a curse. Thomas also meant twin. As if he was meant to be Christopher’s twin. But he isn’t. He’s not a copy of anyone or anything. He wants to be himself. 
If only his father could try to understand. If only Christopher would stop resenting him for existing. He wasn’t born to constantly remind Christopher that he was replaceable. Like any other person, he was born to live. 
Thomas leaves the ballroom and walks down the well-lit hallways. His footsteps are muffled by the blue carpet, making them sound less forlorn. He sticks his hands into his pockets, glad that Christopher wasn’t there to scold him. 
No wonder Ryoga had called him angry. Thomas has been angry his entire life. He grew up under the shadow of someone he never wanted to be. He was surrounded by traditionalist ideas that chafed against his free-spirited nature. 
“Please, for God’s sake, just let me breathe!” he had once screamed at Christopher in the midst of an argument.
Christopher merely looked at him with a pinched mouth and narrowed eyes. How could his brother not sense his anguish and pain in that plea? How could he not see that Thomas had wanted nothing but to live his own life and take pride in his own accomplishments? Would Christopher spend the rest of his life despising Thomas?
Thomas has tried. He’s truly tried to understand his older brother. He’ll never be as smart as him but at least he can read in-between the lines. Christopher was never really good at communicating. Thomas has tried to reach out to him, yet all of his attempts are perceived as threats. He is an unwelcome invader in Christopher’s territory. 
The resentment bears its fangs whenever Thomas excels at something Christopher doesn’t. Dancing, sports, social interactions, hell, even dueling. His brother’s expression darkens and his personality grows cold. Jealousy radiates from his lanky body in waves. 
“Oh,” breathes Thomas as he opens up the music room. 
Christopher starts, sitting up from their mother’s piano. Thomas had been scared away from the instrument when they were younger, Christopher’s sharp admonishments raining down on him like thunder when he dared run close to it. 
“Thomas,” he says, not spitting it out but instead whispering it. 
They hold each other’s gaze for a few moments. Briefly, Thomas can see Christopher as Lord Arclight, his hair braided, his custom suit dark blue and accented with a cravat. Then, the present returns. The sun shines down on his brother’s long hair, left loose as usual. 
“I’ll leave you to it,” murmurs Thomas as he goes to close the door. 
Christopher’s brows raise, as if he was about to say something. Thomas briefly pauses, waiting. 
One. 
Two. 
Nothing. 
The room seems to let out a sigh. Quietly, he closes the door behind him. 
Since returning to their family home, they’ve briefly agreed to a truce. A vein of fear has seeped into their childhood home, draining it of its vibrancy. Something is coming to Heartland. They have to prepare. 
Surrounded by bittersweet memories and a looming future, the both of them are equally confused. They couldn’t help what they were born into, could they? The weight of their ancestors seemed to increase the longer they remained behind these walls. 
Spare. Heir. Thomas. Christopher. He realizes now that they had been free in Heartland. 
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henrysglock · 2 years ago
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James' Working Master List
My Bullshit Theories:
Mother Is God In The Eyes Of A Child (Mothergate origins, Vecna’s mother imagery)
Psycho Killer, Qu'est-ce Que C'est? (Neither Henry Nor Vecna Are Psychopaths: An In-Depth Behavioral Analysis)
A Night of Monologues (Splicing together the released 4.07 script and the transcript of One’s filmed monologue. Spoiler: They’re two halves of a whole speech)
Shattered Mirrors and Cracked Walls (An analysis of Henry’s dematerialization scene, the aftermath, and a determination that we’re being shown all 4 timelines interchangeably in the NINA version of the 1979 HNL Massacre)
One Does Not Simply Lose A Gate (The 2nd part of the 1979 massacre aftermath and proof that a timeline exists where Henry/Edward did nothing wrong)
Where Is All The Blood Coming From? (A comparison between the NINA massacre's smeared blood and the carnage resulting from democreature attacks)
A Tale Of Two Vecnas (An analysis of Vecna's scorching in Dimension-X, which shows us two distinct and physically different men)
Pick A Damn Jumpsuit! (Matching up the Dimension-X jumpsuits to NINA massacre jumpsuits)
Barnes And NO!! Where Did He Go!! (A write up on the discrepancies in One’s appearance, tattoo, and color grading in the closet scene as evidence of his disappearance from the plot)
Why Do You, As The Big Bad, Have No Lines Or Powers? (Vecna’s physical form in the UD has no dialogue and doesn’t use psionic powers: evidence and theories)
So Which Is It: Night or Day? (Discrepancies in time-labeling in the released 4.07 script and how they might link to El’s 1983 escape)
Plinko Power! (NINA's plinko game as a microcosm of timeline theory and Henry's time-based powers)
The Mystery of the Move-In Date (Physically speaking, there’s no possible way that the Creels moved in in 1959)
Our Lord and Savior…Vecna? (Why Vecna/001 is God, Based On Analysis Of ST4, The Bible, And Other Supporting Media)
The First Shadow: Who Knew Whom in 1959 (Why Certain Character Were Removed From Hawkins Prior To ST4)
Proto-HeIIcheer: Who Did George and Betty Become? (Why Patty Newby and Allen Munson may be the pairing to watch for in The First Shadow, rather than Patty and Henry)
Fics:
Paper Faces — POTO x ST fusion fic (Complete)
ptolemaea (blessed be the children) — Henry’s fix-it fic (3/?)
Spider Fact, Anyone? — 1959 RPG-style ST minific
Featured Art:
Creel Siblings Outfit Swap
Creelarke Aesthetic Board
Featured Edits:
NYMPHOLOGY (ft. HNL)
The Colors of ST4 (ft. Le Monde)
Henry Creel: Brainless Borzoi
Art:
TUNNEL VISION (ft. Henry Creel)
Edits:
Would’ve, Could’ve, Should’ve (ft. Henry Creel)
Left-Brain, Right-Brain (ft. Henry and Edward Creel)
House of Leaves (Mini-Library):
House of Leaves Initial Analysis
House of Leaves Excerpts
Creel Files:
Henry Files:
Rebuke of Apologism Claims
A Note on Script Analysis
Our First Impression of Henry Sets Him Up For Failure
The Seagull
Stand By Me
The Divine Comedy
Henry and Edward, Jekyll and Hyde
Young Henry, Adult Henry, and the Rabbit Scene
Multiple Henries: Screenshots and Brenner Comparison
Perspective On The Length of Henry's Imprisonment
Vecna as the Villain: Defining Stranger Things' Narrative
I, Tonya and Perspective-Based Truth
Henry's Unseen Costumes
Kate Trefry and The First Shadow
Henry Didn't Manipulate El Re: Soteria
Details the Duffers Must Address
The Fallacies in Henry's Spider Schtick
NINA and Vecna’s Black Obelisks
Henry and Brenner Expansion Pack
Expansion Pack!
Creel Cousins:
Eleanor “El” Creel
The Stare Runs In The Family
Room (2015)
And Soon, Others Were Born
Sleepyhead
She’s Mike’s…Cousin! Second Cousin! Lots of family in Sweden.
Luke and Leia vs El and Mike (Stav’s Post)
Luke and Leia vs El and Mike (2)
Luke and Leia vs El and Mike (3)
Henry/Edward…Anakin…
Family Files:
Heritability of Powers
Psychopathy: Learned or Genetic
Karen, Virginia, and Tortured Husbands
ST5: Which Wheelers Live and Why?
Alice Creel: Admission of Innocence by Omission of Fault
ST4 Victims: A Story By Proxy (AKA The Breadcrumbs Post)
Even if Henry killed Virginia, It Would Be Self Defense
Brenner and Virginia Expansion Pack
Pedo-Files:
Mamas and Papas: Spiders, Flowers, and Bathtubs
Karen, Billy, Virginia...Henry
Will and Vecna Expansion Pack
Will Files:
Expansion Pack
The First Shadow/Creelarke:
Creelarke Origins
IT (1990) Reddie Aesthetic Similarities
Scott's Funeral Scarf
A New Timeline
IT (1990) Aesthetic Updated for TFS
Radiationgate:
Radium Files:
Eben Byers, Radium, and ST3's Soviet Plot
Chemistry Class: Maria Skłodowska-Curie
Radiation Sickness Files:
Psionic Powers and EM Radiation
Vecna's Curse: Radiation Sickness Symptoms
ST5 Predictions
Nuclear Disaster Files:
Henry Creel Literally Nuked Hawkins
Chemistry Class: Nuclear Explosion Imagery
Chernobyl, Hawkins Earthquake and ST4's Soviet Shadow (1)
Chernobyl, Hawkins Earthquake, and ST4's Soviet Shadow (2)
Phantomgate:
What in the POTO Visuals?
POTO 2004: Film Analysis
Dart and Gustave: Love Never Dies
Secret Admirers: Puzzle Tales Connection
Anime/Manga References
Coming Soon: Fullmetal Alchemist
Rambles:
1: On Byler and Rink-O-Mania
2: On Demoslugs
3: On Byler and Open Secrecy
4: Sad Thoughts About Post-S2 Will
5: On Spore Lore
6: On The Rain Fight
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