#garin of the orphans

[ghostofpalestonesword]

Garin Of The Orphans & Cedra

[shripscapi]

here’s some of the requests I got! there are some I did not get to that i’d like to eventually, but in the interest of not burning out i’ll return to them at a later date

sam, addam, and loras for assorted anons - pia for @blankwhiteshield - asha for @ziphius - garin of the orphans for @fatipher - barbrey and thoros for @blackbetha - wylla for @amethyinst

[goodqueenaly]

I couldn’t help but notice that Arianne Martell and Asha Greyjoy have a lot in common and are pretty much foils of each other’s. My question is if they met do you think they’d get along maybe even become friends?

I think it’s important to remember that Asha and Arianne still come from extremely different cultural and personal backgrounds. Asha is extremely comfortable with a weapon in hand and on the deck of a ship as its captain; Arianne has relationships of varying degrees of closeness with her martially trained cousins and a firm friendship with Garin of the Rhoynar orphans, but she’s certainly no warrior or sailor herself. (And this is without getting into the wholly separate politico-cultural histories of the ironborn and the Dornish.) Asha seems to show little interest in marriage, especially the sort of diplomatic matches Westerosi aristocratic women are often subject to (embodied in her rejection of Tristifer Botley’s domestic vision for the two of them in favor of “adventures”); Arianne, by contrast, fully accepted that she would marry for political alliance (and specifically that she would not marry a countryman), and indeed seems set to use her hand in marriage as a way of advancing her political interests with the would-be Aegon VI. Asha also enjoyed - well, I wouldn’t call it affection from her father, but something like regard from Balon as a de facto son and heir; Arianne, by contrast, was forced by her father into an artificial rivalry with brother Quentyn, and came to believe that Doran neither loved her nor wanted her to succeed as Princess of Dorne.

I’m not saying these characters could never see eye to eye or even be friends. However, I think there is sometimes a gap between “the author is using these two characters to explore similar themes” and “these characters are similar and would be friends if they met”.

[theink-stainedfolk]

Bold The Facts Tag

Thank you for the tag @drchenquill

I'll take my OC from A Matter Of Time , My Baby, Garin

◇+°. PERSONAL

$ Financial: wealthy/ moderate/unsure/ poor / in extreme poverty

+ Medical: fit non-applicable / moderate / sickly/ disabled /

Class: upper / middle/working / unsure/other

✓ Education: qualified/unqualified / studying / other

✗ Criminal Record: yes, for major crimes / yes, for minor crimes/no / has committed crimes, but not caught yet / yes, but charges were dismissed

◇+°. FAMILY

Children: had a child or children / has no children/ wants children (eventually)

Relationship with Family: close with sibling(s) / not close with sibling(s) /has no siblings / sibling(s) is deceased

• Affiliation: orphaned / abandoned / adopted/ found family / disowned / raised by birth parent(s) / not applicable

◇+°. TRAITS + TENDENCIES

extroverted / introverted/ ambivert

disorganized / organized/in-between

close-minded / open-minded / in-between

calm / anxious / in-between / highly contextual

disagreeable / agreeable / in-between

cautious / reckless / in-between / highly contextual

patient / impatient / in-between

outspoken / reserved / in-between / highly contextual

leader (reluctantly) / leader (gladly) / follower / in-between

empathetic / vicious bastard / in-between / highly contextual

optimistic / pessimistic / in-between

traditional / modern / in-between

hard-working / lazy / in-between

cultured / uncultured / in-between (depends on the culture) / unknown

loyal / disloyal / unknown / highly contextual

faithful / unfaithful / unknown / highly contextual

◇+°. BELIEFS

Faith: monotheist / polytheist / atheist / agnostic

☆Belief in Ghosts or Spirits: yes / no / don't know / don't care / in a matter of speaking

★ Belief in an Afterlife: yes / no / don't know / don't care / in a manner of speaking

★ Belief in Reincarnation: yes / no / don't know / don't care / in a manner of speaking

* Belief in Aliens:

yes /no/ don't know / don't care

Religious: orthodox / liberal / in between / not religious

Philosophical: yes /no / highly contextual

◇+°. SEXUALITY & ROMANTIC INCLINATION

Sexuality: heterosexual / homosexual / bisexual / asexual / pansexual/ nonbinary

◆ Sex: sex-repulsed / sex neutral / sex favorable / naive and clueless

Romance: romance repulsed / romance neutral / romance favorable / naive and clueless / romance suspicious

Sexually: adventurous / experienced / naive / inexperienced / curious

Potential Sexual Partners: male / female / both (but has little interest in sex) / agender / other / none / all

Potential Romantic Partners: male / female / both / agender / other / none / all

◇+°. ABILITIES

Combat Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

= Literacy Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

Artistic Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

Technical Skills: excellent / good / moderate / poor / none

◇+°. HABITS

Drinking Alcohol: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / tried it / alcoholic / former borderline alcoholic turned sober

Smoking: tried it / trying to quit / already quit / never/ rarely / sometimes / frequently / chain-smoker

Recreational Drugs: tried some / never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / addict

Medicinal Drugs: never / no longer needs medication / some medication needed / frequently / to excess

Unhealthy Food: never / special occasions / sometimes / frequently / binge eater

$ Splurge Spending: never / sometimes / frequently / shopaholic

Gambling: never/rarely / sometimes / frequently / compulsive gamble

I'll tag @cssnder @finickyfelix @willtheweaver @ascotwriting @agirlandherquill @leahnardo-da-veggie @illarian-rambling @winglesswriter @paeliae-occasionally @the-golden-comet @graveyardshift111 this is an open tag

[lilisouless]

It seems to be normal in Ravka to choose your own last name, Nabri & Garin are the last names of the woman that tried to marry her to an old man, and the man that did nothing to stop it. Even if using it for Liliyanna it would be like acepting Sabina as her mom. Also i think her relationship with Liliyanna is not exactly in the open, onyl close people know about her family. So she may have choosen the last name to take a new identity

Surely, by the time the grisha trilogy was written, at least the first book, Leigh probably didn't thought about it that much but nothing contraditcs it either.

Just like is ambiguous wheter Starkov, Oretsev and Zenik are Alina,Mal and Nina´s real last names, given that they were orphans, neither seem to know (correct me if i am forgetting something) about their real family

edit: Brekker is not Kaz´s real last name either and there´s no explanation to why Brekker, other than he choose it for the sound probably

Does anyone know where Zoya gets her last name from? Her aunt took her in & her last name was Garin. Her father’s last name wasn’t Nazyalensky, according to the Grishaverse wiki.

[nobodysuspectsthebutterfly]

@surfcommiesmustdie replied to your post:

do we have any evidence that the orphans still practice water magic? i can't remember seeing anything

Not as such, no. Just Garin’s words:

“...we sing and play and dance on water, and know much and more of healing. My mother is the best midwife in Westeros, and my father can cure warts.” --AFFC, The Queenmaker

The orphans of the Greenblood are of pure Rhoynish ethnicity, still keep the Rhoynish traditions of living on a river (and traditional arts and crafts and textiles and such), and are the only Dornish people who still speak the Rhoynar language, though mostly in secret. So if anyone in Dorne knows anything about water magic anymore, it’s probably a few of the orphans, but I would imagine it’s very very rare, and probably more stories and traditions than major magic.

[maestrejayde]

TEASER: STORY COMING SOON

This is my first post and it's a teaser for a story I started writing after I reread the GOT books recently. I decided I wanted to explore the Tumblr world with it. My plan is to post a teaser twice a week for a few weeks before I start posting any chapters, just because I'm still working on it and editing and such and also, need to introduce myself to Tumblr! Here's the first on! They will become less and less vague as we go on. *Will post warnings and ratings on the teasers where applicable*

Rating: E (This teaser is not explicit, but the story will eventually be mature in nature. Minors should not read.)

The nights in Planky Town are crisp. The cold often comes as a surprise to first time visitors, who travel across the Narrow Sea to trade. It’s usually not the only surprise they suffer, here in Dorne’s largest city. 

There is no other place, in the whole of Westeros or Essos, quite like Planky Town. It sits almost entirely on the water, where the Greenblood meets the Summer Sea, built up haphazardly by the Orphans who call the whole of the river their home. Instead of streets, long planks are tied to poles that are set deep into the earth below the water, making narrow alleyways that skim above the surface. Instead of traditional buildings, there are narrow boats, brightly colored and ornamented, tied together as well as to the alleys. Of course, as the city became a more popular trading post, foreign traders, inland Dornishmen and even the occasional Orphan merchant who rose above the means of his birth, would build a grand building on the land that borders Planky Town, pushing the radius of the city further out. But the soul of the city still lies on the water. 

It’s the water that brings the night air. When the burning Dornish sun gives way to the moon, winds from the river and the sea lighten the air. Typically, the Inlanders are driven inside from the cold; into pub boats, floating brothels, or anywhere else big enough to have a hearth of some sort. That leaves the night full of Orphans. 

The Orphans of the Greenblood are as unique as Planky Town. 

Thousands of years before Aegon Targaryen and his sister-wives Rhaenys and Visenya captured 6 of the 7 kingdoms, the ancestors of the Orphans, the Rhyonar, lived in flourishing city-states along the immense Rhyone River. As ancient and storied as the Old Empire of Ghis, the Rhyonish civilizations held important knowledge. For example, though the Westerosi like to tell the story of “The Smith”, the Ryonar, in their generosity, are the ones who taught the Andals how to work iron. In the same spirit of generosity, the Rhyonar welcomed the first colonists from the growing Valyrian Empire in the east. In return, Valyrians began hunting the turtles they considered sacred. When the Rhyonar pushed back, they were killed and enslaved, and their cities began to be occupied or destroyed by the invaders. Prince Garin convinced other city-state leaders to join forces under his command to face the invaders together, directing the largest army ever seen in Essos, then or now, against an army of 100,000 Valyrians, 100 war elephants and 3 dragons. It’s unknown really how, but Garin managed to push back the Valyrian empire where no other had been able to, therefore becoming Garin “the Great.” Unfortunately, the dragonlords would eventually bring Garin and the Rhoynar to heel. Only one leader, the warrior princess Nymeria, escaped Essos, along with 10,000 boats full of refugees. After much wandering, they landed in Dorne. So none of her people would have doubts about staying, Nymeria burned all 10,000 ships. 

At the time, Dorne was separated into many kingdoms that had never been unified. One of those kingdom’s leaders, Mors Martell, married Nymeria. With their combined forces, they unified Dorne and ruled together, from the Martell seat in Sunspear. Most of the Rhoynar, finally safe in this new land, a sea away from the dragonlords, acclimated. Others, however, were not so content. There were those that learned from the old mistakes of the Rhoynar, no longer trusting outsiders. They built narrowboats from the burnt remains of Nymeria’s fleet and sailed south, until they came to the mouth of the Greenblood River. On the Greenblood, they do their best to preserve their heritage, speaking their mother tongue and practicing their ancient customs. Nothing is quite the same though, here on this narrow river, surrounded on all sides by harsh desert. Always, they long for their true home, their “Mother Rhyone.” Thus, they call themselves Orphans.

[spammreviews]

D:

This is for characters who could be better, in my opinion, but who’s bad traits really don’t negatively affect the story that much.

385, 386, and 387. Garin, Drey, and Silva (Not Pictured)-

Garin, Drey, and Silva are Arianne’s conspirators in her plot to crown Myrcella. As I write this, I just finished listening to an audiobook of The Queenmaker chapter, and I do not remember anything about them. One of them’s part of that Dornish orphan group , one has an “open smile”, and another has freckles. These three are victims of the quick pacing of the Dorne plot in Feast, not being given any time to flesh out their personalities or characters.

384. Skahaz no Kandaq-

At the very least, Skahaz No Kandaq is a bit more interesting than a lot of similar characters in Slaver's Bay, such as the Wise Masters of Yunkai, as he is on team Dany, which presents us with some interesting moral quandaries, and the ethical dilemmas Dany faces in Mereen is one of the more interesting parts of the book. 

However, when we first meet Skahaz in Dance, we’ve already seen a million other characters just like him in both Essos and Westeros. 

And, therein lies the rub. What Skahaz represents isn’t bad, and he serves his function alright in the story. However, characters like him or a dime a dozen, especially in Dany’s story. It got to the point where I had to frequently check the Wiki as I read because I kept getting characters mixed up.

Some of the characters similar to Skahaz are higher up simply because they are given some sort of quirk or schtick which makes them stand out. For instance, Clayton Suggs is a follower of Stannis who’s weirdly enthusiastic about sacrificing people and he makes rather off-color jokes.

Clayton Suggs is actually very similar to Skahaz, but you’ll see that he’s way higher up simply because I remember him.

Also, Clayton Suggs is mostly a joke character, whereas Skahaz is actually intended to represent an ideology which is meant to tempt Dany. However, Skahaz being so cartoony means that he doesn’t really work as well because it means we can’t see the ideology as a realistic threat. 

I have no problem with one dimensional villains, I just want my one dimensional villains to be interesting in ways other than them presenting interesting moral quandaries, which really has nothing to do with Skahaz as a character. Dany would still be in an ethical dilemma even if he didn’t exist, he’s just a convenient way to represent the evil that she must accept in order to succeed. I remember hearing once about character writing. If a character can be replaced by a lamppost, then they’re not a well written character. Well, Skahaz could be replaced by a chainsaw. 

One dimensional villains can also work if they’re intended to be unknowable monsters who terrify our main characters, but Skahaz hasn’t been that so far. He does not invoke fear.

Also, Dany’s chapters can feel so on the nose, and Skahaz does not help this. Some of the best parts of Song is when it is subtle and ambiguous, but so many of these characters in Mereen are unambiguously evil or unambiguously untrustworthy, and the idea that Dany is facing all of these moral dilemmas is constantly shoved down our throats, as is every other major idea of her chapters in Dance. It would be fine if these chapters were fun, but they aren’t.

In conclusion, for the love of god STOP GIVING EVIL CHARACTERS BIG NOSES.

383. Areo Hotah-  

Feast and Dragons are long books which add a lot of new characters. A lot of these character’s stories interrupt the stories of characters we already like and are already invested in. So, it can be tough to get through someone else’s story when we know that someone we like a lot more is waiting at the other end. What makes everything worse is how gosh darn boring Areo Hotah is. 

Something they tell you in creative writing classes is to think about the characters “want” and what they “need”. Areo Hotah wants to do his job, and he needs…something, I guess.

As such, there is very little conflict within the heart of Areo Hotah. Areo knows who he is and what his place in life is, there’s no path for him to change or grow. 

I wouldn’t say that Areo has no personality, as he has the personality of a stereotypical bodyguard. He’s big, not dumb but also not smart, simple minded, and he doesn’t like to talk. It would be fine if this was just what was on the outside, but we get the same on the inside. There’s no hidden depth to Areo Hotah.

The two biggest points of interest within Areo’s character is the fact that he was abandoned as a child, and the fact that he still feels like an outsider in Dourne. Those are both interesting, but neither is really explored. Areo doesn’t seem all that lonely or in need of some comfort. He’s just…Areo.

Why is Areo Hotah so committed to his job? Is it because his entire life’s purpose has been devoted to his ax and fighting? We’re never really shown that. Is it because he was abandoned as a kid? That was one line. 

Not only do we know why characters like Jon, Brienne, and Davos, are so committed to being good at their job, we feel their wanting, and see how it cuts deep to the root of who they are.

But Areo Hotah? He’s just…Areo.

Also, Areo barely seems to have opinions on anything. What does he think of Doran? He…respects him, I guess, but also, we barely see that, and it doesn’t really matter. It’s nice when characters bring along a certain perspective and this perspective influences their actions. Areo just does what he’s told, which means he’s less of a person and more of a tool. Yes, he has an impact on the plot, but only in the sense that Doran gives him tasks. He has the same impact as Ilyn Payne or the Catspaw. Basically, Areo has no agency.

His description as a “human camera” is fitting, as not only does he simply observe, he also rarely commentates on anything. 

I suppose this isn’t super important, as he only has three chapters so far, but still…I’m sure he could be an interesting character if given more time to development, but the thing is, a lot of characters were very interesting by their first chapter, and that’s because we had time to learn who they are. The first third of Thrones doesn’t have any real plot, so we get to just familiarize ourselves with the characters and the world. Areo is not afforded that honor. His first chapter has to do so much legwork setting up the world, introducing us to minor characters, and setting up the situation in Dorne, there's very little time left to actually explore him as a character. Meanwhile, his chapter in Dance also has a huge amount going on, with time being taken to recapping the Dorne plot from Feast, setting up Winds, and giving us a very symbolism based meal.

I kind of forgot that the chapter was even an Areo POV until the end, because we get a very long stretch of time where Areo straight up isn’t mentioned. You could take Areo out of the chapter and nothing would change. Not only that, but nothing that Areo Hotah hears seems to affect him at all. The last sentence of the chapter is Areo repeating his mantra of “Serve, obey, protect”, but it feels hollow. Areo has no reason not to do any of those three things, and it also doesn’t seem like he’s finding it difficult to do any of them. Areo’s chapter in Dance isn’t about him, it’s about Doran and the Sand Snakes, and their conflict. Areo has no stake in this conflict, as he seems to be pretty apathetic towards it, all he cares about is protecting Doran, which the chapter has nothing to do with. I don’t even know why the chapter is from Areo’s perspective, as Arianne is also there for almost the whole time. She actually affects the narrative of the chapter, which you want a protagonist to do, even if it’s the protagonist of a single chapter. I guess you can argue that Doran is actually the protagonist/ main focus of the chapter, and the only reason why Areo is there is because Doran’s inner thoughts need to be a mystery. However, you could say the same for Davos and Stannis, and Davos is way higher than Areo.

One last thing. Areo reportedly really likes Arianne, referring to her as his “little princess”. Despite this, we’re never given any signs of affection beyond this. No kind words are exchanged.

One of the parts of Areo’s feast chapters I like is when Areo thinks that Balon will be harder to kill than Arys. I know it’s not the intention, but it makes me think that Areo has killed dozens of Kingsguard before. They keep sending them, and Areo keeps on killing them.

382. Aerys II- 

Everyone talks about how Aerys II “went mad”, but in what way??? Did he develop schizophrenia? Psychopathy? Antisocial personality disorder? I know they don’t have those terms in Planetos, but they could give us a little bit more than “the mad”. Maybe “the mad” is just code for “the dickhead”. Why was Aerys such a dickhead anyways? Who knows! Summerhall? Maybe.

381. Amory Loach- 

Amory Loach has the opposite problem of Rorge, in that he doesn’t have any gimmick or flair to his evil. He’s just…an evil dude. I guess that makes him more realistic, but it also makes him boring. It’s kind of fine because he only appears in three or so chapters, however.

380. Rafford- 

Rafford is another evil rapey guy for Arya to kill. He’s evil in an uninteresting way, and that’s fine, I guess, because that’s the point of his character, and he didn’t need to be anything else. Once again, he barely appears.

379. Craster- 

There’s already too much incest in this story, and there’s already too many awful people in this story. The mystery of Craster’s exact motivations are a bit interesting, I suppose.

Also, Craster does stand out a bit in his extreme commitment to being the biggest asshole possible, like when he complains about the sounds Gilly makes when she gives birth to the baby he forcibly impregnated her with. He’s not just incomprehensibly evil, he’s also a shiteel who’s a jerk to everyone. However, there are many other characters who also fit that description.

Craster might just be the most evil character: child rape, child sacrifice (most likely), incest, being a huge jerk to people who just survived a zombie attack, being a jerk to everyone else, saying he’s a “godly man”, constantly moralizing the night’s watch for extraordinarily minor things while being extremely evil, it’s legitimately impressive.

378. Cleos Frey- 

Jaime’s chapters in Storm work fantastically in part due to how well Brienne and Jaime work together. They are the perfect narrative foils, with each of them having to learn the opposite lesson (Jaime needs to be less egotistical and Brienne needs to learn to love herself). Not only that, but the presence of each other is perfect for teaching them their lessons. Seeing how much of a dipshit knight Jaime is helps Brienne to understand that knights and chivalry is bunk. Seeing this cool warrior lady teaches Jaime that toxic masculinity is bad.

We can see what Jaime and Brienne need to learn from their respective nicknames for each other, “wench” and “kingslayer”. When they use their real names, it shows that they see each other as human beings. This idea of names humanizing people is important to Storm, playing a part in Davos and Jon’s stories.

It also helps that Brienne and Jaime’s personalities and life philosophy are basically opposites. Despite this, they have similarities in the sense that they have been outcasted before, which helps them to bond.

Jaime and Brienne have the vibes of a couple from a 1930’s screwball comedy executed with perfectly precise character writing.

Cleos Frey also briefly accompanies Jaime and Brienne on their journey, and his job is to die.

He…has a personality. That personality is “cowardly”.

372, 373, 374, 375, 376, and 377. Hosteen Frey, Black Walder Frey, Stevron Frey, Ryman Frey, Lothar Frey, and Rhaegar Frey

These are a bunch of other Freys. Their personalities are basic and the same as three dozen other characters.

Here’s the thing about the Freys, the personality of the individual Freys doesn’t really matter, as they work best as a giant amalgamous glob. The whole of the Frey family is hilarious, simply because they are a massive group of people who are all evil and pathetic in their own way (except for Jinglebell and Rosalyn and blah blah). I get them mixed up all the time, and I think that’s what George intended. Every individual Frey is but a grain of sand in a vast beach. It doesn’t matter how good the individual grain of sand is, as long as the beach itself works as a beach.

Each Frey is not a fantastic grain of sand, but they do make a fantastic beach.

371. Chataya- 

George usually writes women with the same complexity which can be afforded to a man, but Ellaria feels very “men writing women”. She’s a prostitute who worships a love goddess and every description of her is icky. Her personality is “horny as heck”.

370. Aegon I- 

We hear about Aegon I a lot, but we know next to nothing about what he was like. Was he into sports? What was his favorite toothpaste flavor? Did he wear white or black socks? We may never know. 

Overall, Aegon I is too perfect. Well, there was the incenst. Besides from the incest, and the colonizing, and the burning people alive, and the imperialism, and many other atrocities, he’s too perfect.

In contrast, his inspiration, William the Conqueror, is a much more interesting figure. He had a crazy life, where he was born a bastard, so everyone hated him, and he became this macho man as a result of that. Aegon doesn’t have any of that interestingness.

369. Arys Oakheart-  

You know, if it wasn’t for Feast, I might put Ser Arys Oakheart higher. During the Sansa chapters in ACOKm he works well as a minor side character, as his niceness and chivalry clashes well with everything else going on. Him being “fond of gossip” adds a bit of playful contradiction to his character which is nice. 

Then, there’s Feast, where he's a stupid horny guy and that’s pretty much it. He has very little in the way of personality and the only internal conflict we get from him is “I’m not allowed to have sex, but I wanna.” I guess this does factor into the theme of people’s primal desires versus how society tells them to act. However, it feels empty with Arys since it’s so basic. We get a similar story with Jon and Ygritte, but that’s completely different for many reasons:

Firstly, we get multiple chapters of Jon slowly falling in love with Ygritte.

The Soiled Knight is Arys’ first POV chapter. He appears in three chapters before that one. Arianne, meanwhile, previously appears in one chapter. Their relationship is not well built, we do not feel the sparks.

Secondly, to Jon, Ygritte symbolizes freedom. To Ygritte, Jon symbolizes idealism and a sort of purity.

With Arys and Arianne, they’re both horny for each other. Their “love” doesn’t represent any deep desires within them.

Thirdly, when Jon and Ygritte have sex in the cave, the whole scene feels liberating. I’m asexual, I usually just get embarrassed during sex scenes, but the scene in the cave is very well done, focusing on the way the two feel about each other in order to get this really romantic and intimate feeling. As such, it might just be the best sex scene in the entire series.

The sex scene between Arianne and Arys in The Soiled Knight is just horniness.

Fourthly, Jon breaking his vows is a huge deal because we see how much honor and oaths mean to him. Jon needs to prove that he’s a bastard who is trustworthy and that he can make Ned’s ghost proud.

With Arys, who knows!? All we know about is that he’s scared of being killed by a Dornish person, and he hates spicy food. Why does he care so much about his duty? Who knows?!

The thing is, we, the audience, don’t care about honor and vows and oaths. However, we care about Jon and his quest to measure up to his own expectations. So, it’s a big deal to us when he breaks his oaths. We don’t give a shit about Arys. He’s another generic honorable guy who isn’t afforded a compelling backstory or anything of that sort.

Also, ASOIAF loves subverting the “knight and princess” trope. I keep comparing Arys to Jon, but there’s also Jaime and Cersei, Jorah’s crush on Dany, hell, even Renly and Loras. Now, Jaime and Cersei have a toxic and unhealthy relationship, but it’s interesting to read about because their interest in each other reflects their own vanity. Jorah’s crush on Dany is cringey, but it advances Dany’s arc by her having to deal with this schmuck. We never even get confirmation about Renly and Loras’ relationship, but I’m sure I can pop open A23 and read lots of fanfic which is infinitely more interesting than Arys and Arianne.

By the time we open up Feast, we’re kind of sick of the same subversion.

Also, George chose to write the line “Was there ever a woman with nipples so large or so responsive?” which is easily in the running for “worst lines in the series”.

I guess you could say that the idea of The Soiled Knight is that Arys feels isolated and alone at Dourne, but Arianne is the only one who’s nice to him. However, I’m giving the chapter a lot of leeway with that analysis, as it’s barely even suggested. It’s clear that Arys doesn’t feel at home and is experiencing cultural issues, but it’s unclear if that translates to Arys having no friends. There are many characters in Song who have to deal with being in new environments that don’t feel at home in. However, with those characters we get more than a page and a half of them thinking about how the food there is spicy. Sansa’s isolation in King’s Landing, Arya’s homesickness in the Riverlands, and Jon’s outcast nature is extremely visceral. With Arys I have a vague idea of how he feels. Good writing needs to be specific, but the only specifics we have with Arys’ “isolation” is spicy food and the Oakhearts having a history with the Dournish.

I felt nothing when Arys died. In that same book, Brienne briefly meets a little person who’s a Sparrow. Later, we learn that this Sparrow has died. Despite him only appearing in a few chapters, I felt soooo much worse about The Little Sparrow dying than I did Arys. The Little Sparrow was nice, he had a sense of humor, he had a personality, he was unique, and he made you wonder what his backstory was.

Arys could only wish to be that. Instead, he’s a half-assed subversion of a trope Song has already subverted a million times before.

367 and 368 Ago and Jogo-

I think that Dany’s Dothraki warrior pals are better than her handmaidens, simply because I think it’s cool when people do stuff with weapons.

358., 359, 360, 361, 362, 363, 364, 365, 366. Alerie Hightower, Ser Jacelyn Bywater, Paxter Redwyne, Harys Swyft, Polliver, Tycho Nestoris, Meryn Trant, and Mandon Moore.

These are all random side characters with no interesting character traits and either no personalities or barely any personalities.

357. Rorge- 

Rorge is another bad guy who’s bad for the sake of being bad, and is bad in the way a lot of other characters are. At the very least, he appears rather rarely.

356. Rakharo-

Rakharo is the best of Dany’s Dothraki warrior pals because of this quote, “Khaleesi, better a man should swallow scorpions than trust in the spawn of shadow, who dare not show their face beneath the sun. It is known.” (A Clash of Kings, Chapter 40). Now, that’s one of the awesomest things anyone has ever said, so for that reason and that reason alone, he’s going above his brethren.

355. Balon Swann- 

Wow. An honorable knight who’s cool and a badass. Yawn. I’m yawning. Yawn. Being cool in a bland and unoriginal way is as interesting as sucking in a bland and unoriginal way.

354. Smalljon Umber-

Now, Greatjon Umber is a lot of fun, but Smalljon doesn’t really have any characterization beyond being tall.

I do appreciate the contradictory name. (Even though we have a similar deal with Little Walder Frey).

353. Daario- 

Stop perving over a teenager, you perv! Daario also has terrible fashion choices. Like, I can appreciate the ambition, but this Icarus has flown to close the sun. He does have a personality, so there’s that.

Many of the Essosi characters feel like a stereotype of a culture that doesn’t exist. For instance, Daario is greedy, kind of effeminate, rather silly, horny, theatric in the way he speaks and acts, and those are very commonly stereotypical traits.

He almost feels a little bit like Jaqen. However, Jaqen is far superior in every way. Jaqen's mysterious, it’s clear there is something deeper going on with him, and the way he acts and talks is so strange it becomes endearing.

Daario, on the other hand, never captures that same fun energy of Jaqen. This might, in part, be a result of his environment. Jaqen sticks out so much from the grit and medieval European aesthetic of a war torn Westeros, and he bounces off of Arya extremely well. It also makes him stand out from Rorge and Biter, who he’s introduced alongside.

Daario, on the other hand, is amid many other “effeminate” greedy tricksters. This makes him blend into the background.

Moving on, George really likes the protagonists being forced to work with untrustworthy characters and then be deceived by them. With Daario, it works because Dany does need him, and the way she goes from being extremely untrusting of him to straight up in love with him feels realistic, as Daario is an adult manipulating a 16 year old. 

However, by the time Daario shows up, we’ve already met Littlefinger, Varys, and Roose Bolton. It feels a bit tiring. I guess that’s the problem with Daario. There are hundreds of characters in this series, and I’m sure it is very hard to make each one unique, but Daario is so similar to so many other characters, except for his appearance.

I do think one thing that makes Daario a bit interesting is his temper, as he gets really angry during a few of Dany’s chapters in Dance. He usually seems so calm and collected, so him getting enraged at Quentyn is a bit of a surprise.

Despite that, whenever Daario shows up I always think to myself “here we go again”. Other than three or so surprising moments, you can always tell how Daario is going to act because he’s basic.

A minor detail concerning Daario is that he doesn’t wear underwear, which is very fitting.

_____________

I would like to say that this is not a ranking of the characters based on morals. This is based on how good I think they are as characters. This is obviously extraordinarily subjective, however, I enjoy ranking and sorting. 

There are three factors I generally considered for this ranking. 

The first is how well written I think the characters are. Do they have dimensions, do they serve their purpose within the story, do they stand out from the very large crowd of faces within this story, et cetera. This one is less important if they are a very minor character. 

The second is how fun I think they are. The point of some of these characters is to get a chuckle, and if they did that, then they succeed as characters.

The third is vibes. Sometimes, I just vibe with characters.

Art Credits to 

The_Mico

https://m.facebook.com/198918470118215/photos/a.232323176777744/465124813497578/?type=3

Amok https://awoiaf.westeros.org/index.php/File:Visenya.jpg

Riot Art Therite

https://riotarttherite.tumblr.com/

The Three Hares

Rae Lavergne

Weak Aside

https://www.tumblr.com/weakaside

Paolo Puggioni

Image of Nettles by Rlyeha https://www.deviantart.com/rlyeha/art/Nettles-885635180

Special Thanks to

A Wiki of Ice and Fire

https://awoiaf.westeros.org/index.php/Main_Page

and

A Search of Ice and Fire

___________

Without further ado, the list. This is a ranking of all characters from best to worst, with 398 being the worst and 1 being the best.

_____________________

F Tier:

398. Xaro Xhoan Daxos-

Xaro is like a weird homophobic stereotype. One could compare him to Varys, but Varys is a character and he has dimensions. There are moments where we are surprised by Varys. Varys has a boring room. Varys went out of his way to save Gendry. Varys has a fucked up backstory. Despite all of Varys’ silliness he never feels cartoony. He’s an actual capable and intelligent person who’s motivations are mysterious and intriguing. Et cetera, et cetera.

Meanwhile, Xaro Xhoan Daxos has no surprises. He’s just…ridiculously one noted, and that note teeters on the edge of being kind of homophobic with a few weird lines which I hope were not George’s intention.

All of this would be fine if he only had a few chapters, but he appears in two books. Two! 

Everything Xaro says and does is so basic. He’s got simple and un-unique strategies because of his simple and un-unique motivations. Half of his lines and actions feel the same. His purpose within not just the story, but within individual chapters and conversations, never changes. I’m getting really angry right now.

I get that we are supposed to hate Xaro, but the hatred I feel with him is not a fun hatred. I do not love to hate Xaro. I simply hate him. He annoys me. The way he talks is so fucking annoying, with this stupid eloquence wich makes simple sentences turn into paragraphs. It reminds me of papers I read in college. “I have crossed long leagues and stormy seas to help you once again.” “A pretty metal, but fickle as a woman. Gold, now…gold is sincere.” Shut the fuck up. He also talks about how hot Dany is every other second. I get the point that the traits of Dany which are valued are her appearance, so even someone who’s not attracted to women is going to act pervy, but it’s still annoying.

Xaro is also ridiculously condescending. It’s purposefully infuriating, but it’s so cartoony  and on the nose it’s not even a funny kind of infuriating. Perhaps he might go higher if he died a terrible death, but for now he’ll go here.

He also adds nothing to the story. He has two conversations with Dany in Dance. The first one lasts for pages, and it’s only purpose is to give us a bunch of information. The second one’s purpose is to piss Xaro off so he can declare war.

In conclusion, Xaro Xhoan Daxos is too ridiculous to be taken seriously, and too annoying to be taken comedically.

397. Yezzan zo Qaggaz- 

It’s really hard to tell apart one Ferengi-esque Ghiscari from another (I think the enslaved people aren’t Ghiscari, but I’m not sure). They’re all ugly, cruel, ridiculously decadent, and greedy. It’s bland, it’s repetitive, and it’s almost, dare I say…lazy. The world of Mereen feels so drab in comparison to the world of Westeros because everyone there basically just acts basically the same. At least with the Ferengi, we were introduced to sympathetic and complex ones, and we learned about the nuances of their society and all that jazz. The Ghiscari are not afforded that same privilege. The exception is Hizdar Zo Loraq, who will be discussed later. 

I’m obviously not saying that George should have introduced us to a nice, sympathetic slaver. Please do not misconstrue my meaning. I’m saying that George could have introduced us to a slaver who’s personality stands out, or a Ghiscari who wasn’t a slaver or something. You can make a character complex and interesting while still having them be completely irredeemable in every way. This is ASOIAF, after all, and this story has lots of characters who are atrocious people but who still have interesting internal psychologies. Hell, sometimes adding complexity or whatever to a character can make them more hateable, as we will later see. I know the Ghiscari suck, but there’s no slaver who provokes the same degree of anger in me that Joff or Ramsay does, and I’ll explain why later.

These are all evil, irredeemable human-shaped pieces of shit, but at least Joff and Ramsay are characters. Ramsay isn’t even that complex…he’s mostly just sadistic for no reason, but his sadistic cruelty is still interesting because he is a character with traits beyond “evil”.  He’s a specific kind of evil, and there’s a reason he’s that kind of evil, and that specific kind of evil comes in a variety of ways. Grazdan and Yezzan and Kraznys are just evil. 

Once again, I am not saying that George should have made a slaver sympathetic. I want to emphasize that. He could have, at the very least, given one of them an interesting quirk, like one of them is a big fan of card games or whatever and the other slavers are really annoyed because he always wants to play. I don’t know. I’m not a critically acclaimed writer of dozens of fantasy and sci fi novels.

Obviously, George making the slavers all greedy and decadent makes a clear point, but there are ways to portray greed and decadence interestingly, as we see elsewhere in this story. With the Ghiscari, George just ramps up the traits to extreme levels, making the slavers too cartoony to be seen as a realistic threat. I’m not against this series being a bit silly, but the slavers feel beyond parody, and this hurts his criticism of the systems of Slaver's Bay, as the story focuses less on how the system doesn’t work, and instead simply shows that the people who benefit from it are annoying and gross. Now, the story can focus on how a system is fundamentally flawed and also show how the people who benefit from it suck, because this story does do that, but not with Slaver’s Bay. 

It’s also definitely possible to show oppressive forces as being ridiculously stupid and annoying while still having them feel real. Outside of ASOIAF, Quentyn Tarantino does this very well with Django Unchained and Inglorious Bastards. Within ASOIAF, well…we’ll see.

In conclusion, the character of Yezzan is extremely lazy writing.

396. Grazdan Mo Eraz (not pictured)- 

It’s really hard to tell apart one Ferengi-esque Ghiscari from another.

Much has been written about how ASOIAF is not just a psychological story (meaning that the plot is driven by the character’s internal psychologies) but also a sociological story (meaning the plot is driven by the world around the characters). Dany’s story definitely succeeds on a psychological level as Dany’s character is well thought out. However, it only occasionally succeeds as a sociological story, in my opinion at least. 

This is because the society Dany interacts with in Storm and Dance doesn’t really feel like a society. We never see what daily life is like in Mereen, or see a diversity of thoughts and opinions within the citizens of Astapor. Everyone feels like a part of one big homogenous blob. A society is made up of individual people, with all of these individual people having their own psychologies. In a sense, sociological stories are psychological stories- but with the psychology of thousands or even millions of people. What is the internal psychology of Grazdan Mo Eraz? Why has his society made him think and act this way? The answer is, he has none. He’s just another bad guy. 

With much of the plot in Westeros, we see that these characters have ideologies which are a result of the world they're in, no matter how minor these characters are. For example, the two knights Brienne meets in her first chapter in Feast are clearly influenced by these ideals of knighthood and chivalry and gender, and these are very minor characters. Even the most displaceable of characters, such as Euron, are clearly influenced by their society's values.

We never get this with anyone in Slaver’s Bay.

395. Kraznys mo Nakloz-  

It’s really hard to tell apart one Ferengi-esque Ghiscari from another. These three slavers are equal in value to me, as they are extraordinarily similar characters, with their only differences being different versions of sucking. One is harsh, one is jolly, and one is mocking. These are very common types of assholes within ASOIAF. I get them mixed up in my mind all the time.

I have one more issue with the Wise Masters of Yunkai and the Good Masters of Astapor. George wrote a fat character who suffered extreme amounts of abuse and bullying because of his weight and has to learn to love himself. However, he also wrote a bunch of characters who are fat to show that they’re rich. This trope isn't even subverted in any way, like with Wyman Manderly. The Wise Masters are fat, and it seems like we’re supposed to be disgusted by the fact that they’re fat because it means they’re decadent and gross. With Wyman, his weight is cleverly used against us, as we assume he’s just a bit player who only cares about himself, but then it turns out that he’s an extreme badass who uses his obesity as a shield. Even with Illyrio, we get the idea that he is more than what he seems to be, and he also serves as a reference to the “jolly fat guy” trope from Shakespeare. However, with the wise masters, they’re just overweight. We are supposed to think it’s funny that Kraznys “has bigger breasts than Dany”. I suppose maybe it’s actually to show Dany’s immaturity, and that she’s negatively influenced by beauty standards, but that’s not something which is really explored. With Cersei, we get her trusting hot people who betray her and disliking “ugly” people who are actually trying to help her. 

That doesn’t seem to be a big part of Dany’s character. Kraznys is what he seems to be and nothing much more than that.

394.Doreah- 

She was not much of a character

And ohhh…she had no personality

And I got this crazy feeling

I’m gonna ah ah put her low

And oh she was so boring

I didn’t care when she died

And I got this crazy feeling

George didn’t care either

As Dany only thinks of her once afterwards

You may ask what’s her name

And I’ll whisper her name

I’ll whisper her name

And her name is D-O-R-E-A-H 

DOREAH! D-O-R-E-A-H

And oh, I’m gonna tell the world

She was Dany’s handmaiden

No, not Jiqui or Iqui

The only difference is that she was blonde

And the way she was described

Was very creepy

DOREAH! D-O-R-E-A-H!

Oh, what’s the point?

What’s the point of her?

Quentyn died for someone’s sins, but not mine.

392 and 393. Irri and Jiqui-

I have forgotten the existence of Irri and Jiqui. They are Dany’s Dothraki “friends”. I feel like George screwed up by making all of Dany’s friends (other than Missandei) uninteresting, and also making most of the Dothraki she encounters lacking in any depth. Jon has a large treasure trove of kooky characters for him to bounce off of. Some of these characters are wildlings, who are displayed as having a wide variety of character types. 

Meanwhile, there are two flavors of Dothraki we meet: fierce men and fragile women. This fill-in-the-blanks approach to character writing is super boring, sticking out extraordinarily from the rest of the series. I don’t care about Jhogo because he is the same as Aggo who is the same as Rakharo. I don’t care about Irri because she’s the same as Irri who is just a non-Lysene Doreah.

Irri and Jiqui are not characters. That requires character traits, which they lack.

391. Reznak Mo Reznak- 

Reznak Mo Reznak is just…too goofy. His whole evil manipulator schtick feels like something from a C-tier Disney movie, and there simply isn’t anything done to make him in any way interesting or memorable. And, with many of these other lower tier characters, one could argue that they work well as set dressing, but Reznak’s set is already dressed fine. We get the idea that Mereen is a pit of vipers, and we get that there are all these people giving Danny bad advice. He adds nothing but another voice, and as voices go, his is the most annoying.

390. Aegon IV- 

Aegon IV feels like an AI generated list of things you don’t want a medieval king to be.

389. Alliser Thorne- 

Purposefully asshole characters are old hat. Sure, Alliser Thorne was created in the 1990s, but uhhh…whatever. Alliser does feel a tad bit tropey, which makes him kind of annoying. He’s also not evil in a fun way, just a jerk. I also don’t like Rast, but I didn’t get an image of him, so I’d also put him here.

I suppose one could say that we need two dimensional jerks like this in this part of Jon’s story, and I suppose that is true. However…I still don’t like him.

I’ve seen a lot of war movies, and there are tough drill instructors who are just as dimensional as Alliser yet still manage to be more interesting. Just look at Heavy Metal Jacket.

Also, like what is Alliser’s deal? He has no motives beyond just hating everyone for no real reason.

388. Jaehaerys II- 

Jaehaerys II is easily the most boring Targ king. Maybe he had a personality, but I can’t say for certain.

[aegor-bamfsteel]

Hey ! You talked a lot about the Blackfyres but do you have headcannons for the GC members like the Mudds or Strongs ? ( for Mudds I like to think they were a small house who boasted about they relation to the Mudds and supported Daemon)

I have some headcanons about the Mudds given Young John’s character description: “John has brown skin and wears brown clothes. He decorates his ears with golden coins.” in TWOW Arianne II. Characters explicitly described as brown-skinned (rather than tanned or swarthy):

Dothraki (Dany I, AGOT)

Summer Islanders (Arya 7, ACOK)

Children of the Forest (Bran 3, ADWD)

Sarnori (TWOIAF)

Ghiscari (Dany 2, ASOS)

Chella of the Black Ears (Sansa 3, ACOK)

Strong Belwas (Dany 5, ACOK)

Victarion’s Essosi sex slave (Victarion AFFC)

Alleras (Samwell 5, AFFC)

Brown Ben Plumm (Dany 5, ADWD)

Nettles (TPATQ)

Bellegere Otherys, courtesan of Braavos (Mercy TWOW)

In short, people called brown-skinned in ASOIAF are from an explicit non-white ethnicity (Summer Islanders, Dothraki, Sarnori, Ghiscari; characters like Strong Belwas and probably Victarion’s slave) are explicitly mixed ethnicity (Alleras, Bellegere, Ben Plumm), of unknown ethnicity (Nettles) or an outlier (Chella, probably due to her harsh nomadic living). Considering he has family members in Essos that joined the Golden Company with him, implying he and they were born in Essos, it’s sensible to assume that John Mudd is mixed ethnicity, and probably mostly nonwhite Essosi considering Arianne calls him “brown-skinned”, whereas Alleras and Bellegere are said to have “light brown skin”. It is unfortunately absolutely like GRRM to give one of his few characters of color the name Mudd; look at “Black Balaq”, “the Ebon Prince”, “Brown Ben” Plumm, “the Black Pearl” or “the Brown Pearl”, “Sandoq the Shadow”, the name Victarion gives his sex slave is a dated epithet of her skin color, etc. He often defines non-white characters by their skin color rather than their actions, like the nicknames of the white characters. The double standard should be discussed further than just a simple headcanon about a Golden Company family. GRRM criticism aside the Mudds are probably descended from several Essosi ethnicities (much like the generational sellsword Ben Plumm); John Mudd wears gold coins in his ears, like the Lyseni Lysono Maar or Garin of the Greenblood Orphans, so possibly part of his ancestry is Lysene or Essosi Rhoynish. The Golden Company has also had dealings with the Summer Islanders at least since the Band of Nine, so it’s also possible he’s part Summer Islander.

Not to dismiss your headcanon about the Mudds (again, this is all speculation), but the Mudds have been extinct for a thousand years; I can believe that the Strongs and even the Lothstons of the Golden Company might be descendants of the Westerosi houses (their lines have only been extinct for about 100 years), but the name Mudd has been used by others. There was another unconfirmed Mudd, Marq “the Mad Bard”, who rebelled against the Durrandons. Jenny of Oldstones claimed descent from long-extinct first men kings, probably House Mudd considering Oldstones was their ancestral seat. So the Mudd name is a symbol of the old riverlands, taken by “half wild” peasant women and “mad” rebel kings. It’s not a name a noble of Westeros would take…if they didn‘t have a surname already. Meaning, I don’t think the founder of the Essosi Mudds had a surname (being originally of the smallfolk, but taking the name when he was knighted like Rolly Duckfield) could‘ve had an illegitimate surname like Rivers that they changed after making a legitimate marriage (like Ser Longwaters), or was even legitimized by the Blackfyre king and allowed to take another surname (like Daemon Blackfyre himself). I have a specific headcanon on who the canonical Riverlander smallfolk/illegitimate character could be, but this post is getting long enough.

It was the support of smallfolk, knights, and minor lords that formed the basis of Daena’s support, and similarly knights and lesser lords that followed Daemon I, who also wanted to improve the status of illegitimate children. Aegor Rivers ensured that the members of the Golden Company would be judged based on merit rather than birth, wealth, or previous slave status. That the Mudds are clearly a family of significance in the Company (two members are officers) despite their possible origins is a testament to how the combined Daemon-Aegor legacy shaped the Golden Company; it wouldn’t have been possible under Targaryen Westeros.

[aegonbeingfakeisracist]

I love a6 but its unfair how he has more connections to the rhoynish culture than his martell family members. This is why it should have been rhaenys instead.

It was certainly a choice to have Arianne and Quentyn so disconnected from that heritage. It’s not that it’s unrealistic from a modern perspective, at all, but when it comes to the specific context of the story, where all people can recite very detailed stories from their family history and they are extremely proud of the impressive feats of their ancestors, to have Arianne and Quentyn take such an academic view on the Rhoynar, rather than having any kind of emotional connection, is questionable. It’s especially egregious in Quentyn’s case.

Arianne can at least provide Myrcella with an explanation - Nymeria burning her ships, the orphans of the Greenblood mourning, the songs to Mother Rhoyne. Quentyn literally looks at the Rhoyne and does not think about his ancestors. His reaction to the dragons has no connection to his forebears’ experiences. Arianne at least identifies strongly with Princess Nymeria and so there’s a theme present in her chapters about leadership and women in power that’s couched in Martell family history. But Arianne, too, is disconnected. She explains the Rhoynar on Garin’s behalf. She thinks of and admires her country’s national heroine, but never really in terms of how she led her people to safety and brought elements of their culture into Dorne. This is despite the fact that Arianne is in a unique position among her family members in terms of what framing her story in terms of her cultural heritage could yield. On a surface level, yeah, because she’s a woman from a family descended from a legendary female figure and where the balance of power has historically been led by women, but there’s much more to it. 

Think about the Rhoynish legends of the Long Night - their story doesn’t involve a sword ending it but a negotiator. Just as Nymeria won her people a home through negotiating for an alliance with Mors Martell, by leaving Ny Sar instead of fighting, the Rhoynish story of what ended the Long Night was a diplomat. That’s Arianne’s entire thing - she’s good with people. She likes people. Every success she has is a result of her talking to people and convincing them to see her way. This makes her unique amongst her family, because who else do we see with that skillset? Not Oberyn, who prefers to act, physically fighting the Mountain with his spear. Not Quentyn, who fails in his negotiations with Daenerys. Not even Doran, who for all his similarities with Arianne lies. But Arianne, whose manipulations don’t involve lying, who doesn’t fight physically, who succeeds when she sets out to convince people to side with her. It would be so cool for this to be tied with an actual cultural connection to the Rhoyne.

I’m not sure I agree about the Aegon thing. Certainly, if it can only be one character with that connection, I’d want it to be Arianne every day of the week. And I definitely agree that it would have been more powerful for Rhaenys to have lived. However, I don’t think I agree that this specifically is one of the reasons that’s true. Aegon is every bit as Dornish as Rhaenys is, even though he resembles their father moreso than their mother. He deserves to have this connection to his maternal heritage. And I think it would be a not-great choice for the emphasis being on Dornish-looking Rhaenys having more of a connection to her mother’s heritage than her brother when she is the elder. As compelling as her potential struggle with this conflict could be and as much as it could be very interesting for her to want to lean into the side of her family that embraces her in a way that her grandfather never did,  Rhaenys also has more reason to lean into the idea of being a Targaryen than either Aegon or Daenerys - she was a Targaryen princess in real terms. She actually lived in Westeros. Aerys sneered at her, but Rhaella loved her. If handled delicately, the idea of her clinging to her Targaryen heritage and eventually forging an identity that is both Martell and Targaryen, or even ultimately renouncing what’s Targaryen in favour of what’s Martell, could be powerful. But it’s iffy to have Rhaenys, the Targaryen princess with a better claim to the throne than Daenerys and actual firsthand experience with being a Targaryen, be more heavily associated with the other side of her family than her white passing half brother, you know? He may not look it, but it’s his, too.

The issue really to me is Arianne and Quentyn. Because with Rhaenys and Aegon, it would be a kind of gross point no matter which of them it was - the Targaryens get more of a connection to Rhoynish culture than the Martells??? They should get that connection. But Arianne and Quentyn should also have that.

[asongofsilks]

ASOIAF fancasting --> People of Dorne: Elliot Knight as Garin of the Greenblood

“ ‘It is a long journey,’ Arianne said, ‘but it will go easier once we reach the Greenblood. Some of Garin’s people will meet us there, the orphans of the river. They live on boats, and pole them up and down the Greenblood and its vassals, fishing and picking fruit and doing whatever work needs doing.’

‘Aye,’ Garin called out cheerfully, ‘and we sing and play and dance on water, and know much and more of healing. My mother is the best midwife in Westeros, and my father can cure warts.’

‘How can you be orphans if you have mothers and fathers?’ the girl asked.

‘They are the Rhoynar,’ Arianne explained, ‘and their Mother was the river Rhoyne.’ ”

With the Rhoynish blood running strong in the orphans of the Greenblood, this handsome actor clearly looks the part of a desert river traveler.

More fancasts from Dorne

[eliamartel]

The only inconsistency in this theory is that Aegon does not know that "the Pisswater prince" was actually Lemore(Ashara)'s son. He thinks he was replaced with a peasant's child.

If the baby swap happened, why was he not told that it was Ashara's son who died in his place especially if Septa Lemore really is Ashara Dayne? Aegon is implied to know Lemore's identity(She turned back to Prince Aegon. "You are not the only one who must needs hide.") but he is not told that her son died in his place?

Why?

-> Some secrets are safer kept hidden. Some secrets are too dangerous to share, even with those you love and trust. - agot Eddard VIII

If all of the above is true, then Septa Lemore has three secrets -

1. Her identity as Ashara Dayne

2. The baby swap of Aegon VI and her son

3. RLJ

Secrets risk being leaked when more people know of it

every additional man doubled the risk of betrayal. That much my father taught me, at the least. -AFFC The Queenmaker

Doran explains he kept his secrets from Arianne because it could spread through carelessness

"I know. If I kept you ignorant too long, it was only to protect you. Arianne, your nature . . . to you, a secret was only a choice tale to whisper to Garin and Tyene in your bed of a night. Garin gossips as only the orphans can, and Tyene keeps nothing from Obara and the Lady Nym. And if they knew . . . Obara is too fond of wine, and Nym is too close to the Fowler twins. And who might the Fowler twins confide in? I could not take the risk." - AFFC The Princess in the Tower

This same scenario plays out on the Shy Maid when Haldon loses a bet to Tyrion and reveals Aegon's identity to him

Probably Ned, Howland Reed, Ashara and the Daynes decided to keep the events in Starfall a secret confined only among themselves (Varys & Illyrio would be aware of it as well). If Aegon's survival and RLJ somehow spread out at the wrong time to the wrong people, it could implicate multiple people in treason against Robert

The baby switch of Ashara's son & Aegon implicates the Daynes in treason. The Rebellion generation Daynes would have been aware and involved in the switch and they committed treason against Robert as they hid the survival of Aegon VI. The Pisswater Prince story masks their treason and House Dayne does not get implicated even if Aegon VI is discovered in Essos and that version of the baby switch gets out(bc according to that story Varys arranged a peasant's child to take the place of Aegon)

And RLJ implicates Ned and Howland Reed in treason against Robert

It is likely that even Jon Connington was told the Pisswater Prince version of the switch bc it's best to keep these secrets from spreading to multiple people. Jon Conningtion only met Aegon(& Ashara - presumed dead in Westeros) six years after the Rebellion in Illyrio's manse.

As to why the Martells were kept in the dark of Aegon's survival? I think Varys took advantage of Robert's victory to pressure Ashara & the Daynes to give baby Aegon to him to be molded and raised according to his vision of an ideal king. Ashara probably decided to raise Aegon as she did not want Elia's son to be raised among strangers. The Daynes must have wanted to inform the Martells about Aegon but maybe Varys threatened to reveal the entire scheme to Robert and that would put all of them at risk.

Okay, but why give Ashara purple eyes and make the Daynes partly Targ-looking, if not so the child that died in Aegon’s place was Ashara’s kid? He would have, potentially, the right eye and hair color, even a credible skintone, being just as part-Dornish as Aegon. The Daynes are not Valyrian in any way. GRRM gave this prominent Dornish House these odd traits for a reason. Barristan even emphasizes Dany’s resemblance to Ashara. Her kid could easily impersonate Aegon if it took after her.

It would have been so much easier to switch those infants within the Red Keep than to smuggle in some lowborn child which just so happens to have these rare traits. They would have been very close in age, and the baby would have likely known Elia, while Elia would not have entrusted her boy to a stranger like Varys but to a kinswoman, her own lady in waiting, who had every incentive to protect the boy and believe the same care from Elia for her own.

It exactly matches Gilly and Dalla’s boys. Even Gilly’s disreputable child and Dalla’s “queenship” with the threatened “heir”, Gilly’s plucky practicality and Dalla’s gentle wisdom.

Why have Ned Dayne looking just like a little Aegon, and have him tell the story of Ashara and “Ned”? (I don’t buy that Ned would have dishonored a highborn lady even with her enthusiastic consent…) Why have him tell the story of wetnurse Wylla at Starfall? It visually places a young Aegon into the story that obscures both his own origin and that of Jon.

Why would they name that kid ‘Ned’? For Eddard Stark killing Arthur? Or for him conspiring with them against his king Robert to save another infant? A mutual pact of secrecy? Jon and Aegon? They are telling coordinated lies about Wylla. Why?

It just makes so much sense.

[looking-for-wisdom]

Bleeding Hearts (chapter one)

a/n: this was a fic I did for the @grishaversebigbang! It ended up being roughly 33,000 words, the longest fic I’ve ever written. I loved participating in this event and working with my gang as well as the tides :)

Corporalki: @villainofthepiece​, @dregstrash 

Materialki: @bucumber​ X, @koelsong​ X [art may contain spoilers]

Summary:   Zoya has spent her life learning to survive a world of fairy tales. She knows better to rely on wishes and fate; those things only protected the nice girls, the ones all the stories were about. She was used to doing whatever gruesome task was needed to get by, but now, with her aunt’s life on the line, she has finally met a monster she’s struggling to beat. A monster that comes in the shape of a kind prince she can’t help to grow attached to. 

But that’s always been the case. The monsters are what you find when happiness is just within reach. But she’s strong and she won’t falter— she’ll do what’s needed, as she always has before, to save the only good woman she’s ever known. Even if it means plunging a knife into the heart of the first man she’s ever loved. Even if it means becoming a monster herself.

Ao3 Link: Bleeding Hearts

(chapter one under the cut)

What becomes of the girls whose parents do not teach them unwavering kindness and whose fairy godmothers are not magic enough to keep them from harm? What becomes of the girls the slipper doesn’t fit and the prince does not steal away from drowning in cruelty? There is no happy ending promised at the close of their story. So they learn, learn to swim through the abuse and lift a sword themselves, lest they become another maggot filled body in the graveyard.

Zoya had read the kind of stories where young women overcame their evil stepmothers with their obedience and compassion. Unfortunately, Zoya had no stepmother, just one horrible regular mother who had birthed her and spent every moment after shaping her daughter into an equally horrible side character in someone else’s story. It wasn’t that she was immune to draw of fairy tales and their promises of futures with a prince who called her lovely, but not every girl had that in her cards. Zoya glanced over the hand she’d been dealt. She was not sweet or innocent enough to be the damsel in distress. The game of fate was rigged— with every girl who was saved from misery a hundred others suffered in her stead. 

Shivering but far too afraid to risk asking her mother for a place by the fire, the childish part of her hoped. Winter’s might be less harsh if she was not so alone and unloved. But compassion was a rationed resource, like medicine and wheat. It might have been nice to have, but girls with no one to fight for them had to choose their battles, and unlike bread, kindness didn’t keep her alive. 

Sabina Garin had been wealthy once, many years ago, and like most who had never seen sacrifice, she underestimated its sting. It was easy to be fearless when one had never felt real fear in the first place. 

When her father had passed his inheritance had been split equally between his two daughters. Lilyana, the eldest sister had invested in a plot of land at the edge of town where she kept a small garden and a chicken coop. She built a home there, selling vegetables and eggs in town when she was in need of money, and she was happy. 

With her own cut, Sabina enjoyed the same luxuries she had in her youth. Seeing no appeal in farm work the way her sister did she resided in the house that had belonged to her father. At nineteen she married a handsome man with nothing to his name but a winning smile, and for a while, she was happy as well. At least, until the debt hit. 

Marriage for love is an appealing prospect, but the stories never talk about the bloody endings. No one mentions the way he yells when the money runs out. No one mentions the way she hoards the few jewels she has left because they’re the only thing that makes her feel like herself. No one mentions when the house is taken and she’s bloated and raging from the parasite inside her but he is nowhere to be found.

Sabina’s episodes began not long into her pregnancy. With no trace of her husband and no place to stay but an abandoned stone cottage at the edge of town it wasn’t long before she became unpredictable. It was a miracle that the child made it to its due date in the first place, though one could say it would be the first of many times Lilyana Garin would come to her niece’s aid. 

She had offered her sister help on many occasions, but Sabina had repeatedly refused Lilyana’s generosity. Pride, after all, was the only thing she had left. When Sabina became a danger to herself, however, the older daughter could stay away no longer. Though Sabina had no way of paying the housemaid who had worked for her father, Lilyana ensured she stayed the nine months until the child’s birth, hiding knives from the expecting mother and restraining her hands when she desperately clawed at her body until the skin was nearly gone. For months Lilyana held her breath, praying that her sister might be stabilized and the child would survive. 

And against all odds, her prayers were answered. 

The midwife said the birth went by with relative ease. The mother and child both handled the process exceptionally well. The only oddity was when she asked the mother for a name. Sabina had only sneered. “Call it what you will. It makes no difference to me.”

For the sake of simplicity, the midwife had given the child a placeholder name of sorts, at least until her mother came to her senses. She’d call her Zoya, just until Sabina saw fit to name the girl herself. 

She never did. 

So perhaps if it had been Zoya’s mother who fell ill, she wouldn’t have agreed to the witch’s terms. She couldn’t have cared less for her absentee mother, but when a letter reached Os Alta it brought news of the closest thing to family she’d ever had. 

Her young cousin, Lada, had written of her mother’s condition-- Lilyana had grown feverish and weak. The town’s medics estimated she had two weeks to live.

Desperation had a strange way of sending people deep into the woods where good, honest people lost their morals somewhere in the darkness. It had a way of turning skeptics into the arms of witches. But when it came to saving Lilyana’s life, nothing was too high a cost. Kill the prince. Carve out his heart and leave his body bleeding on the floor. Zoya wasn’t a killer, but a few towns away one of the few good people left in the world was dying. Zoya would have given her soul away a thousand times if Lilyana lived. 

The main square of town jittered with anticipation. The feeling filled Zoya’s chest, clamping down on her lungs and stealing away her breath. Gossip was sweet on the lips of housewives and young maidens, like the juice of an apple after taking a bite. Zoya was no fool; she knew what was on their minds. A few months earlier, the young prince Nikolai had proposed-- but not to a distant princess or nobleman's daughter. He’d given the ring to an orphan girl with no prospects or riches. Faces lit with hope and perhaps a bit of envy whenever they spoke of the prince’s fiance. She’d been from a town just carriage rides away from Os Alta. It could have been any of them. But yesterday, news had come that the girl had left Os Alta for good, leaving the promises of riches and romance behind her. Not a single person could figure out why. 

She’d been given a shot at a storybook ending. Zoya wasn’t gullible enough to believe her life would have been perfect, but when she thought of what her own future held, even she couldn’t help a pang of irritation. She would have taken wealth in a heartbeat over her fate. She shifted the basket she carried up onto her shoulder, the weight of it exhausting her arm at a rapid pace. With her other hand she lifted her skirts in a futile attempt to keep the mud from seeping into the fabric as it dragged along the ground. As she walked she overheard elated conversations.

“They say she was beautiful-- hair like starlight and a smile like the sun. It’s surreal, honestly, that some everyday girl won over a prince. She must be quite something,” said a girl she’d met only in passing, to a young blonde woman at the baker’s stand. Then, with a cheeky smile, added, “Maybe I'll find myself a princess soon with my winning looks.” 

Across the way a middle aged woman shared her own thoughts on the matter with her daughter. “Perhaps if you spent less time fooling around that could have been us! We’d have been rich, you idiotic girl!—”

Despite herself, Zoya felt a familiar chill go down her back.

Tiny people, wrapped up in their tiny lives, bound to accomplish tiny things. For perhaps the first time ever Zoya envied them. At the end of the city’s main road, after dozens of wooden merchant stands and civilians homes, were the woods. Travel in Ravka was unavoidable, but most families stuck within the cities borders as much as possible. The forests on the outskirts of town were places of darkness and witchcraft beyond the understanding of the standard civilian. However, there were ways to make navigating the woods less dangerous. Old wives tales said to carry black tea leaves in one’s left shoe or bury a lock of hair in the dirt before beginning your journey. Most nonbelievers opted for a professional guide. 

Zoya had no guide as she found her way between the brush and trees, though, nor was her shoe supplied with tea leaves. Her travels through the woods were not a situation of point A to point B. 

Zoya intended to find a witch. 

An hour in, Zoya had acquired a multitude of new cuts up her arms from low hanging branches and nearly destroyed what was left of her skirt by snagging it on thorn coated weeds. She’d also come across at least fifteen new types of bug she’d never seen before and honestly could have gone her whole life without. Zoya had learned to hold her own against all sorts of dangers growing up in Pachina, but that didn’t make her any less disgusted by the grimes and grudge of the Ravkan forest. 

She dragged onwards, a cool sweat gathering on her forehead and regrets filling her mind. Of course— hundreds of people go missing every year without any explanation and yet the one time she goes looking for trouble the death forest decides to be a normal lot of trees. Typical. 

“Don’t know how to handle someone who doesn’t fear you? Is that it?” She called out to no one in particular. “I didn’t realize witches were such cowards.”

Or perhaps she was just a stupid child, looking for magic where it didn’t exist. Perhaps those people had simply been mauled and eaten by bears and she was the idiot trying to be the next. 

The sun passed over the sky as she became more and more hopelessly lost in a forest where she seemed to be the only inhabitant. Honestly, witches had no respect for willing customers these days. She only realized just how much time had passed when dusk began to fall. Night was coming, and she had no idea how to get back to the city. It was one thing to be in the forest during the light of day, but trapped in the darkness with no food or water was something else entirely. 

The moon shone a sickening white glare onto the black dirt floor, seeming to take all the pigment from her skin. Zoya hadn’t been afraid of the dark for many years, but there was something… off about the way the darkness felt here, as if it was alive and feeding on any sort of life. Goosebumps rose on her skin, and she tensed, waiting for something horrible but not knowing what. 

She stood, frozen, listening for any sound other than her own shallow breathing. But nothing moved, not even tree branches in the wind. She was alone. 

Which made it all the more terrifying when someone spoke. 

“What could possibly bring a lone girl to the woods at night?” said a molasses smooth voice from behind her. 

Zoya spun around and was greeted by a pale faced man with dark hair who was far too close for her to not have noticed his approach. Every instinct in her mind screamed to back up, but she forced her legs to stay in place. She would not be intimidated. She met the man’s void black eyes with a fearsome stare. “I’m searching for a witch with the kind of magic to help me,” she stated, voice like steel. “Tell me, would you fit that description?”

A sly smile curled across his face and sent a chill down her spine.

 “That depends,” he crooned, “what can you offer me in return, Zoya Nazyalensky of Pachina?”

Zoya felt a certain sort of dread sink into her chest. There was something wrong with this man-- he knew things he shouldn’t. She should have been afraid, but a morbid part of her was drawn to it. 

She wondered, despite herself, what would it be like to be him? She’d never feel small with a power like that at her disposal. She’d never be made a fool of. For a moment, the swell of her envy almost overpowered her reason, but then she thought of Lilyana. She was not here to find a way to be rid of her own weaknesses. Zoya shook the initial fog of his presence from her mind and reminded herself that for once, she would not be selfish. 

“What is it you want?” she retorted.

His smile did not falter as he considered. He slipped past her, like an ink spill with legs, so that she had to turn to keep sight of his face. Her eyebrows furrowed together in confusion as he walked away from her, but just as she was about to call out for him to stop he paused and glanced back at her. “Well?” he asked. “Are you coming?”

Her mind was empty of a response, perhaps still caught up on the absurdity of what she was doing. Her legs, thankfully, had instincts of their own and carried her forward when he began walking again so she didn’t lose sight of him in the darkness. He led her through the trees, as if he was navigating a maze for which only he had the map. As lost as she’d already felt, it was nothing compared to the lack of an internal compass she had now. The forest had consumed her completely. 

This was insane. Her mind ran rampant with possibilities as the silence between them grew longer. She’d be murdered by this demon of the woods and no one would even hear her scream as he dismembered her. She should run while she still had the chance. 

Except, if she ran Liliyana died. 

So, she kept walking. They entered a clearing of land. At the center of the plot was a looming mansion of black stone and though Zoya was no expert on the woods, she had spent the day wandering its depths and knew for certain the building had not been there before. This man’s magic was dark, but it was also powerful-- she needed powerful. The dark haired man led her to the tall doorway of the structure and held open the wooden door. “We can discuss terms inside.”

She hesitated for just a beat. This could very well be the room in which he planned to butcher her and bake her liver into a pie. She considered this man she knew nothing about and what he was offering. If there was even the smallest chance he could help her, she had to take it. 

There was no going back. She stepped through the door frame and into the home of a witch.

Whatever she had expected, this was not it. She remembered the tale of witches with homes of candy to lure in naive children. She had thought she’d see cages filled with starving creatures and cobweb covered jars holding various gruesome substances. She had thought there would be a cauldron to brew potions that would cure dying aunts. To her surprise, though, there was nothing of the sort. The floors were a sleek black tile and the walls were covered in bookcases filled to the brim with titles in languages she didn’t understand. Golden lamps hung down from the ceiling, casting a warm light onto the sleek table in the center of the room filled with well kept paper and an ink well. Tapestries of the night sky made with painstaking care hung as the rooms most prominent decor. 

If she hadn’t known better, she would have thought she’d wandered into the home of one of Ravka’s most wealthy nobles. 

She swung around to face the man, who had been observing her carefully since her first step into the room. “First things first, who exactly are you?” She asked, eyes narrowed. 

“Names are a powerful thing, Zoya,” he answered as he walked towards the desk at the center of the room. Something about the way he moved reminded her of black silk. “For now, you can call me The Darkling.”

Her lips pulled together in a tight line and placed a hand on her hips. For a moment she considered calling him out on his pretentiousness-- what kind of title was “The Darkling”-- but she restrained herself. In the grand scheme of things his name hardly mattered, and angering him didn’t strike her as the best way to get what she wanted.

He took a seat at the desk and gestured to the chair directly across from him. Smoothing her skirt as she sat down, she felt almost like she was at a business meeting in the town square and not trying to make a blood deal. “I’ve heard that magic can do things science can’t. Buildings are created without any regard for physics and wounds that normally kill are healed in a split second,” she began, an authority in her voice that she hoped hid the fact there was no real power behind it. “My aunt is ill. The doctors say there’s nothing to be done, but that is the opinion of a medic, not a magician. Can you save her?”

A certain rage sparked within her when he didn’t look her in the eye. She didn’t have the time to waste on a man who could do nothing for her. She had already lost a day to the woods, and here he sat, unimpressed and hardly listening. Part of her wanted to get up and leave right then and there if he wasn’t going to give her request the dignity it deserved, but she stayed seated, waiting. 

He spoke then. “I can,” Zoya’s breath caught half way in her throat. Hope crawled into her lungs and left no room for breath, “but it will cost you.” 

“I don’t care,” she responded, not missing a beat. “I’ll trade my life for hers, just name the price.”

He wasn’t smiling, but Zoya could almost see the grin in his eyes and felt like she’d just walked into a hunter’s snare. “I know you’re afraid of me, Zoya,” he said, and though she wanted to insist that some stranger in the woods didn’t scare her, her words fell flat, “but I have known you for much longer than you believe. Your familiar with a blade, aren’t you?”

Zoya swallowed the lump rising in her throat and nodded. When she was young she’d studied swordplay when her mother was away. Soldiers left home to begin their training at fourteen in Ravka, and for a girl whose home had been anything but stable, it had been an appealing opportunity. The issue was, the army was for men only. She’d hoped they’d see her skill and immediately make an exception, but when she was finally old enough to enlist she’d been turned away at the gate. 

How this witch knew that was beyond her. “I believe we can help one another. For you, I will not only return your aunt to health, but also give you the chance to pursue your dream,” he continued. “All I ask in return is that you rid Ravka of what is standing in our way. The Lantsov line has held this country back far too long-- I plan to lead us into the future, and I’ll need a general by my side. The only thing you need to do is get rid of the old crook’s heir.”

Zoya could barely breathe. It was all too good to be true-- first he’d claimed he could help Liliyana and then he’d promised her what she’d dreamed of since childhood.  She would have taken the deal in a heartbeat if he wasn’t asking her to commit treason in return.

“Vasily,” she breathed, but he only shook his head. 

“He’s not nearly competent enough to be a concern. Talents like yours should be spent on a real threat. The king’s second born, Nikolai, is much more clever than his brother,” said the Darkling. “I know you don’t trust me yet, but my intentions are good. You, of all people, have seen the state of this nation-- the hardship it’s people face. You and I are very similar: ambitious, strong,  and intelligent. We can change things.”

She chewed her lip and shifted in her seat, weighing the pros and cons. Zoya was many things, but she wasn’t a murderer. 

At least, not yet. 

Her rejection from the army had allowed her to keep her hands blood free until now. It wasn’t that she had any compassion for the prince, but there was nothing noble about slaughtering an unknowing victim. The honor of serving her country and protecting her people against an enemy who would kill her if she didn’t end them first was vastly different than what he was asking her to do. 

In the end, the morality of the proposal didn’t matter. If it was one life to save another, Liliyana was more important. The only question was whether or not The Darkling had any credibility to his offer. It was true she barely knew him, but for the first time since she had first encountered him he seemed fully sincere. A tug in her gut told her he was right. She didn’t know if they were as similar as he claimed, but something deep inside her made her believe his love for Ravka was as real as her own. 

And if he was telling the truth about that, then he was probably true in his claim that he could heal her aunt, too. Or, at the very least, she had to believe it was true. She feared she would not be presented with another opportunity like this.

It was the best chance she had, even if it would make a killer out of her. She stared him down, taking in the room that had appeared from nothing. “I’ll do it.”

She could repent her sin later by aiding this man in his journey to lead Ravka into an age of prosperity. That was for later, though. For now, Zoya just needed a plan.

The Darkling smiled knowingly, but as far as she could tell it was not mocking. Looking away for only a moment, he pulled a quill from somewhere she couldn’t see and handed it to her. 

“Find your way into the castle and get close to the prince. Trust will make him foolish. If you need to contact me, use that quill. The ink will find its way back to me. When it is time to put the plan into motion I will contact you. Until then, keep your wits about you.”

“Wait--” she interrupted, afraid he’d simply dissipate after giving his orders. “How am I supposed to infiltrate the palace? They don’t just allow anyone inside.”

“Nikolai has been in need of a new Etherialki for a few weeks now,” he answered, unphased. She tried not to wonder what kind of spies he must already have under the Lantsovs’ noses to have that kind of information. “You will be filling the position.” 

The servants of the Lantsov family were divided into three orders: Coporalki, Etherealki, and Materialki. Coporalki had a tendency to remain in the palace. They were responsible for keeping the palace functioning properly and were trained in the art of medicine. Materialki was the class of any sort of specialist working within the Lantsov’s walls. From chefs, to tailors, to blacksmiths, each played their part in making up the artisans category. 

Etherealki were traveling companions to the royal family and whatever rich guest happened to be staying with them. They accompanied their charge from dawn till dusk, braving and complication of man or nature along the way.They were known to think on their feet to quickly amend any problem their employer might encounter. It was, without a doubt, the most fitting role for Zoya’s skill set.

 “What about my aunt? She might not last long enough for whatever you’re planning to be ready.”

“There’s no need to worry-- deliver your end of our agreement and I swear to you that your aunt will live.”

He extended a hand towards her and she examined him one last time. Growing up, she’d been told to never trust witches, and here she stood, going into business with one. If life had taught her anything, it was that the worst monsters aren’t always supernatural in nature. For all intents and purposes, the Darkling seemed to have good intentions. More than that, he had the power to save her aunt. 

From every angle, Zoya came out of this deal with what she wanted. 

She held his gaze and took his palm in a firm handshake before gathering her things and heading back into town.

[jocelynships]

Anyways some lore about Jay bc I’m not gonna get her reference done soon but I rlly wanna talk about her:

She’s a grey xweetok (I rlly like xweetoks ok)

Grew up on Krawk Island

Is an orphan, doesn’t know her real family

Real name is Jasmine, but she thinks it’s too fancy so she goes by Jay instead. Call her Jasmine and she might come after you. Her last name is unknown

Idk if they were also orphans or if they did have parents but it’s my hc that Garin and Jacques from Curse of Maraqua were also orphans, so she grew up with them, acting as their older sister and helping raise them

At the age of 12 she ran away from the orphanage and ran with pirates until she was about 16, when she decided to go off and explore Neopia on her own terms

She left Garin and Jacques bc she didn’t want them following in her footsteps but like. Look at how that turned out :)

She traveled Neopia in search of treasure for 6 years (she’s 22), and came into contact with many famous and legendary Neopians. Some good, some evil. Some she got along with, some she didn’t

Not really good or evil, she’s more of an anti-hero type character. She does things mainly if it benefits her, but she will do the right thing when it comes to it

She tends to pull the whole “I’m a lone wolf” act, but in reality has a soft spot for those she cares about and will come to their aid

But she does cause a lot of chaos. She’s an adventurer, but she also grew up around pirates and has a lot of pirate tendencies. Jay is impulsive, stubborn, a bit selfish, and has a bad thieving habit. But she does have a heart of gold, and has a vow to never take from those in need

That being said, she acts as a Robin Hood of sorts, and has been known to steal from the rich and help out Neopets in need. She disguises herself as she doesn’t want her “tough and uncaring” image to be ruined

She does reunite with Garin and Jacques during a venture to the ruins of Maraqua. This would be after the events of Curse of Maraqua when she meets them again, so Isca and Caylis would be with them

Jay however doesn’t recognize them, and actually attempts to fight them as she thinks they’re trying to get the artifacts she’s after (they recognize her tho)

Once she remembers them, she joins Garin’s crew and constantly teases them, especially over Isca and Caylis (who she becomes friends with as well)

Even though she’s part of his crew, Jay does go off on her own from time to time. She likes having her freedom and doesn’t like to be stuck in one place

More to come later once I reread the other comics, but she has her roots here!!

[toujourspurr]

Minor character appreciation post

Tamar Kir-Bataar for getting in front of Genya to shield her from the fucking Darkling, everytime she was all sweet and wifey with Nadia, and for being a badass in general. Plus her sleeveless uniform with her muscled, tanned, tattooed arms has me so gay.

Liliyana Garin who was nearly murdered by a walking stick yeilding pedophile in a church to protect the niece she barely knew, then whom she travelled across the country for, who later adopted another orphan girl.

David Kostik for laying a finger to hold his place in a book, looking up, threatening to kill Yuri if he ever upset his wife again, then going back to his reading, and for being the coolest nerd and scientist on the planet

Nadia Zhabin for working on her inventions with David tirelessly and without even want for rest, and for rescuing Isaak and the Birgitta Schenck in an underway bubble...how fucking cool

Birgitta Schenck for purposely falling into a lake so she might become queen... stupid, but dedicated.

Leoni Hilli for taking on the last name of the woman who saved her life and caring a relic to remember her by in her hair, for being unapologetically happy and optimistic no matter what the situation, for never backing down from a challenge.

Hanne Brum for being one badass bitch, stealing and hiding away multiple sets of uniforms so she could sneak out and be free for a little while, who took the blame to save Nina's ass despite knowing the Wellmother would express her disappointment to her father, who discreetly left the convent to tend to the sick, who cut off all her hair and tailored her face, drastically at that, to help the women in the factory, and who knocked out her own father with a wrench (iconic).

Genya Safin for being Genya Safin. What can I say that hasn't been said already? And also for thinking enough of Isaak to know to add instructions on how to eat new and difficult foods like oysters in his notes for dinner, and for still embroidering gold onto her kefta and eye patch in remembrance of Alina.

Isaak Andreyev for everything he'd done. He deserved so much better and his death hurt me so bad. Here's to that multilingual, cabbage roll loving boy.

Kirigin for being so dedicated to Ravka and doing better than his father he basically handed over his vast fortune to the crown and happily took on his image of a fool.

Sankt Grigori for being so fcking precious. He hated enclosure and small spaces but put up with them for Nikolai's sake. He also tried to keep his body to minimal display for the mortal's sake. Precious shy immortal.

Juris gets a mention too for being Botkin II, seeing Zoya's hidden/repressed potential and pushing her to do her best asking nothing they weren't already going to give him in return.

Dominik for being Nikolai's friend and keeping the loneliness at bay during his childhood, for introducing Nikolai to the commoner's life which undoubtedly was a big part of shaping Nikolai's kingship.

Tolya Yul-Bataar for being Tolya. Unquestioningly loyal like his sister, both keeping their faiths despite disbelief and sometimes ridicule from others, and also for being such a genius: how does one memorise so much epic poetry? Not to forget how he snatch Nikolai up in a hug when he returned,,, soft boy. I also want to add that he has a ponytail. Good imagery.

[dazedclarity]

Annja Creed is lowkey southern as fuck: my headcanons

listen the fact that Annja grew up in fucking Lousiana and yet has NO southern affectations is a TRAVESTY and a TRAJEDY like why even give her a “poor orphan child in New Awlins” backstory if you aren’t going to effing USE IT

Annja got rid of her accent in order to fit in to NYC and academic society but she used to be full on “y’all’dve” level south 

Her accent almost never comes out anymore except when she 1. spends extended time in the south and 2. is roaring drunk

such as the one time she ever let herself get wasted in front of Garin

he didn’t think dragging Annja away from a bar brawl kicking and yelling what sounded to him like straight gibberish was how that night was going to go, but go that way it did

She secretly prefers Lousiana Creole to French

not so secretly when she’s annoyed at Roux

she isn’t big on cooking but she can actually make a bitchin’ jumbalaya 

the first time she had what passed as sweet tea and fried chicken in the north she was SHOCKED and OFFENDED (because aren’t we all)

she wishes she could keep a bottle of tobasco sauce in the otherwhere because she needs it pretty much as often as she need the sword

girly country music is her biggest guilty pleasure, though she prefers the songs about striking down sons of bitches who do you wrong

she knows every word to Beyonce’s Daddy Lessons and is not above belting it in the car

she literally starts to feel depressed after a while if she doesn’t have some good crawfish etouffee

she was once asked on tv what her first date was and she thought through everything she could possibly do to avoid revealing that it was offroading in her highschool boyfriend’s pickup truck

she was once wrought with guilt after drawling “bless your heart”  with a wide smile to one of Garin’s fangirls. Mostly because the woman replied with an enthusiastic “Oh, thank you!” not realizing that it roughly translated to “you naive dumbass.” 

with absolutely no undercurrent of “fuck you, hands off my man” whatsoever, thank you very much

none

at all

that’s ridiculous

she lowkey kind of loves football and tailgates and wishes she had more opportunities to attend them

she can smoke a cigar like a motherfucker