#game of thrones crackfic

[just-some-random-blogger]

Clearly Not Me

The second prince of Dorne is famously a punk-ass rat. He's never had someone put him in his place before, let alone a bartender that was serving him.

Oberyn Martell x Reader | 1k+ | cw: gender neutral!reader, modern au, bartender!reader, crack fic, dummy!Oberyn 'Bobby' Martell, typos, etc.

A/N: @sloanexx likes feeding my fic demons

Tagging: @multifandom-fangirl4 @pinksirensong @aralezinspace

"What can I get you?"

A man in a sits down in front of me. And though I was busy wiping the bar top, I could see he was wearing a bright yellow shirt.

"You're new here," he speaks as I arrange a few glasses and bottles.

I put some away in the back station and the cabinet beneath the bar, "not really." I straighten up with a sigh and lock eyes with him. I lean on the bar and repeat, "what can I get you?"

The man with dark hair and an exposed sternum raises a thick brow at me. He props his elbows on the surface between us. It was apparent to me that his top was not really a shirt, with how open it was, or yellow, but a mix of gold, browns, oranges, and like hues. It had intricate patterns that would've made him look tacky had it not been as apparently expensive as it looked. What a pompous asshole.

But then again, everyone in this fucking place was. I mean I was just serving a Lannister two seconds ago, and not the self aware one.

"I would know you if you weren't new," he says, resting his right fist down, "and you would know my order."

Ahh, gotta love asshole hour.

I lean forward, making sure not to let my annoyance seep through my sweet smile, "should I guess or will you just tell me what I can get you?"

The man chuckles. His smirk is lopsided. He licks his teeth and leans in until we're less than a foot apart, "a dry Manhattan with some olives on the side."

I nod and pull back, "dry Manhattan and olives."

I begin to work on his order.

I can feel him watching my every move, but I could honestly not care less.

"When did you start working here?" he shifts on his bar stool to watch me as I walk across the bar. I smile back at a regular who waves me goodbye. Prince Viserys gives me one of his greasy smirks and I return it with a polite one. I walk back to the man I was serving.

The said man eyes the Targaryen. He turns back when I reply, "about a month."

He purses his lips in thought, "makes sense. I was in Dorne at the time." He straightens up and clears his throat after saying this. He waits for me to react to his words, looks like he's half dreading it, but what he fails to realize is that he's acting far too guilty with someone who doesn't give a fuck.

I begin to mix his drink. He relaxes slightly at my missing reaction.

"You made friends with Viserys Targaryen within a month?"

I raise a brow at his words and set my shaker down, "are you my friend?"

He chuckles, shifting his weight on his elbows, "well, we've just met my dear."

"Then why would I be friends with Prince Viserys?"

I pour his drink.

He chuckles again, "he's not really a prince who says goodbye to people though."

"Well," I place an olive on his Manhattan and hand it to him, "maybe he liked my drinks."

I hand him his extra side of olives as he takes his drink. He raises his Manhattan with a brow, "maybe."

I watch him take a sip. He licks his lips after and turns to his margarita glass. He nods and smiles, "it's good."

I tilt and raise my hands at that.

I walk off to attend the back station. I realize that this man must really love hearing himself talk when he starts talking again even though my back is turned to him and I'm carrying a shit ton of glasses.

"He tips well?"

I scoff out a chuckle and look at him to see if he was being serious.

With the way his lips purse beneath his stupid mustache and how he clarifies, "Viserys, I mean," he's clearly pretty damn serious.

"With all due respect, none of you tip well," I retort as I put away the washed glasses into the cabinet.

He narrows his eyes and pushes his shoulders back, "I find that offensive."

"You know, save for maybe Tyrion Lannister," I add.

He scoffs and mutters under his breath, "you place me beneath a Lannister."

I pretend I don't hear it.

"Well, you'll know me well enough after tonight."

I do not withhold the face his words illicit because I was turned back to him again. I finish tidying the glasses with a sigh and turn back to him, "alright, Mr. Yellow Shirt."

"Excuse me?" Mr. Yellow Shirt pulls his head back in offence and furrows his brows, "this is not a shirt."

I raise a brow and walk over to him.

"It's a robe," he words sternly.

I make it a point not to apparently react to his words. Leave it to rich people to wear the most ridiculous things outside. I mean a robe? Really? My mother would have smacked me if I did that.

I lean over the bar and examine his clothes. He eagerly stands and flaunts it.

I mean it is a pretty good robe-- the man grins from ear to ear and stretches his arms out --but still.

I raise my brows at him and nod, "and so it is."

He chuckles and sits back down. He moves his drink aside and pops an olive in his mouth, "only three like it in the world, and all of them belong to me now."

Gosh, I better shut this down before he goes off and thinks I actually want to talk about it.

"Good for you, Mr. Yellow Robe."

The smile on his lips flattens. I fix the tools behind the bar.

I feel the man try to burn me with his gaze but I don't give him the satisfaction of looking back at him.

I cave when he gets eerily quiet.

He's immediately on the defensive, "my name is not Mr. Yellow Robe, and this is not any yellow," he motions to himself, "it's mustard yellow. #e1ad01," he leans on his elbows again, "I would know."

I cannot contain my expression. I'm honestly surprised he knew something like that. It both makes me gain respect for him while simultaneously thinking he's a bit looney.

"Alright the-"

"Oberyn Martell," he cuts me off and sits up straight.

Ah.

There it is. That's why he's such a prissy princess, because he is one.

I decide to do what I always do when people here introduce themselves to prove a point, I smile and introduce myself back. It normally gives me a chance to take hold of the conversation since these big names don't expect a nobody to match their energy.

True enough, Oberyn stills in his seat.

I wipe a glass, "you got a nickname, Oberyn Martell?"

He pulls his head back, "what?"

I watch a line form between his brows. I hold back a chuckle. Didn't the folks who write the gossip spreads call him Prince of the People because this man is for the streets?

I shrug, "what kind of nicknames does a kid named Oberyn grow up with?"

He furrows his brows.

I raise mine when I think of something, "Bobby!"

His ghost leaves his body, "what?"

"Like for Robert!" I place the glass bow, "Bobby! Or Bob," I tilt my head, "Bob suits you well, I think."

Bob's jaw drops as he scoffs, "I am not a Bob."

"Bobby then," I smile, "Bobby's cute. Bobby's sweet. Bobby's an approachable baby boy who buys you bubblegum cotton candy."

He looks like he's actually about to turn a shade of red. Mustard and Ketchup.

He takes his glass and mutters before drinking, "do I look like someone who buys bubblegum cotton candy?"

I chuckle as he downs his entire drink, "only to people who call you Bobby."

He lets out a breath as places his empty glass down.

"You know," I decide to further fuel his flame, "you and the prince of Dorne are actually both Bobbys."

I mask my chuckle at his mortified look with a smile when I turn greet a woman who calls for me from across the bar. I walk up to her, chuckling under my breath as I take her order.

I walk back to my station near Bobby to make her drink.

Bobby watches me and stretches his neck, "I'm not the prince of Dorne, if that's what you're getting at."

I stop in my tracks and knit my brows as I look at him. Oh, so we're playing this game? I shake my head, "of course you're not." I look back at my drink.

Bobby takes a moment to register my words. He quips back, "what?"

I ignore him in lieu of finishing making my drink. He does not enjoy this one bit and raps on the table to catch my attention. I usually don't entertain rude interactions like this, but I couldn't help myself.

I look back at him, nearly gagging in laughter over his sour expression. I finish the order before deciding watch to reply. I match his expression, "the prince of Dorne would never wear something so garish, Bobby boy."

I smirk as I walk away with my finished drink, pleased with myself over the choke-like sound he makes at my words.

"Garish?!" he barks then calls out my name.

I hand the woman her order and smile at her when she thanks me, pays, and gets up to leave. I take her cash payment and smile, "now that's how you tip."

[no-hugs-peach]

Short Story From the Hubs 1

They looked deeply into each other's eyes and then Sansa pulled her blade out and stabbed Neji.

[flmer]

★ oh no! it's the baby apocalypse! (2) ┊ wc:

content: talks of baby stuff, crackfic?

pairings: idia & malleus x gn!reader. (seperated)

note! I finally did the part 2! although the last part would be Kalim and Jamil.. This was stuck in my drafts and I just noticed now. part 1

idia.

idia is the type of dad to spoil his child since he doesn't really know what else to do, he isn't used to saying affectionate words but he does make it up by spending time with the child and spoiling them.

I believe that idia has some experience in handling kids because of ortho so he wouldn't technically be completely clueless about fatherhood. (also there's a chance that he watched those family animes)

when he first saw his child, he froze. he froze like an ice statue because he's in shock like wow?? is that really his baby?? (the baby literally has his fire hair.)

he's awestruck because of how adorable the baby looks and not to mention how cute it is... idia promises that he'd do anything to make his child smile

he spends his free time bonding with his child by watching numerous animes and playing games that's child friendly of course, even though the child could barely talk... but it is quite endearing to hear the nonsensical babble of your child and idia nodding along with whatever they just said as id he understands them.

“I probably won't be able to buy that much merch anymore... unless I make my child enjoy gaming and anime >:) ”

malleus.

he would isolate his child without knowing he's isolating his child inside his castle. it was how he was raised but his child won't be completely isolated just protected. malleus wants his child to not have the same childhood like the one he had.

malleus would be king by the time he had a child but that doesn't mean his child would rarely see him, no. malleus grew up without experiencing his mother and father’s presence in his childhood that's why he makes sure his child always sees him. malleus's child would practically be in the throne room playing with toys and malleus's tail and also talking gibberish nonsense with the guards that's stationed in the throne room mostly silver and sebek. the scenario goes like this: malleus on his throne listening to silver and sebek's reports while his eyes sometimes stray to his child and his mouth would twitch and turn upwards- the reason was because his child is now currently munching on silver's long cloak while their hand was occupied with grasping sebek's pants. it was an eandering sight.

the first time he saw his child, he cried. the fearsome dragon fae king was shedding tears like a newborn baby and it was because of the mere sight of his child. when the child first opened their eyes- malleus saw his own striking electric green eyes staring right back at him and that was what made him have a wide smile on his face as his child reaches for his horns with their small closed fists.

lilia sometimes makes sure to visit just so he could spend some time with his precious grandchild, yes, his bangs got burned again by a similar green fire that came out of the mouth of the baby he's holding. malleus saw this happen and his reaction was to chuckle while sebek fretted over lilia's now smoking bangs but lilia only waved him off saying that he's used to it by now, and silver is just standing there with a soft smile on his face.

malleus takes you and his child out every night to walk with him in a forest that malleus used to go to back when he was a child whenever he feels overwhelmed with his feelings. the forest is a beauty with it's thorned vines that seems to wrap around trees, there were also some glowing fairies lingering and lighting the beautiful forest. the forest was the meaning of peace and beauty.

malleus hums a familiar lullaby that he used to sing for you back when you both were still at nrc, his hands caressing you and your child's hair as he wraps his arms around the both of you protectively as if the both of you would disappear out of his arms.

[procrastinatingsoicanreadfanfics]

Game of Thrones Masterlist

my requests for Game of Thrones are currently OPEN! i love this series so much, and would love to write fics/imagines/etc for pretty much any character!!

hmu to be added to any taglist!

main masterlist | request guidelines

OC: Alethia Stahl (Woman of the Watch AU)

Woman of the Watch -  relationships: jon snow x oc, sansa stark x oc | summary: When Alethia Stahl is thrown into the world of Game of Thrones, she's super excited to be part of the fictional world she adores so much. That is, until she realizes how shitty medieval times actually are. | tags: fluff, smut, timetravel, crack (started out as it), angst

An Unlikely Friendship - relationship: grenn & oc | summary: part of the WotW universe;  He cannot be sure who she is - but she reminds him of his sisters, so he feels like he must protect her. | tags: angst, fluff, timetravel

What if...? Woman of the Watch Edition - summary: Alethia fell into another world and made a bunch of choices - some better, some worse. But what if things had gone differently? What if Alethia had made other choices?

WotW Memes

oc masterpost - tags: inspo, contains spoilers

Sequel: Hand turns Loom - keeping the summary a surprise to avoid spoilers :) | can be read as a standalone!

Jon Snow

Sold to One Direction??? - relationships: none | summary: crackfic!! evil Mistress Catelyn sells Jon to 1D | tags: crack

[cloudyswritings]

Hollow knight bugs and real world species: P2

Hornet: So we know that Hornet is the daughter of the pale king and Herrah, making her some sort of biological monstrosity. But what bug is she based on? My best bet would be a horned orb weaver, specifically either a long-horned orb-weaver or Gasteracantha versicolor based on coloration and her horns.

Zote: So the in game/logical answer is that zote is whatever type of generic beetle that team cherry concocted from stag, Hercules, and rhinoceros beetles. However I think that’s really boring, I personally subscribe to one of the single best crackfics in the fandom Camouflage of Great Renown and think zote is a nosk that left Hallownest and lost his memories before retuning and adopting his persona. It’d even explain how he’s actually really hard to damage(see coliseum) and how he keeps getting places before ghost does.

Midwife: So I’ve seen a lot of people headcanon that she’s a centipede of some sort, and it kinda makes sense? Like centipedes are actually really good at caring for their young and protect them until they’re able to hunt on their own, so I think it’s a plausible and likely theory. That’s said I’d like to present some alternative ideas. Midwife to me, looks a lot more like she has an earwigs body shape, based mostly on the width of her. That said her behavior matches up far better with a trapdoor spider and she lacks antennas. Overall I’d say a trapdoor spider is more likely as an alternative reading of her species.

Lord fool: So here’s the thing with lord fool, there’s a lot of evidence he’s a higher being of some sort. Most of it comes down to the way the fools, while infected, seem less damaged by the radiance and seem to keep a large portion of their mind intact. Plus his position-dead on his throne- seems earily similar to a certain pale wyrm. Interestingly however it seems like his mask is actually just a mask, because we can see the top of his head and it looks to just be soft carapace. He’s also got six limbs so we know he isn’t an arachnid, or crustacean. My best guess would be either a deathwatch beetle(the texture on them looks like a good match) or a more likely a green junebeetle. Him being a junebeetle also matches nicely with how the fools are regarded as invasive, or not belonging in Haloownest. My last theory is that the bug the colosseum is built in may be the Lord fools old shell, aka wyrm.

Bretta: She looks a lot like a hair soft-shelled beetle to me, but her colors are all wrong. Based on that I’d say she’s actually a female scarab of some sort(sorry y’all my beetle knowledge isn’t up to par just yet!!)

The Hunter: So I’m really and truly unconvinced that the hunter is a bug, or crustacean, or arachnid of any kind. Bro visibly has a spine of some sort and the only beings with hands remotely similar to his that we see are THK, The shade lord, and the collector. That said we do still know he has an exoskeleton. I’ll admit I’m kinda stumped, I’d love to hear what y’all think. Verdict: inconclusive.

Baldurs: So I’m pretty convinced that these fellas are a pill millipede of some sort, they have the right number of legs and do curl up for defense. Additionally they spit infection, which I imagine when non infected would be some sort of toxin— something millipedes are well known for.

Mosskin: So this covers the mosskin as a whole, I’ll probably make a post for them specifically eventually. They’re obviously creatures that are in a symbiotic relationship with plants(because Unn). The only ones I feel super comfortable giving a specific species atm are the moss chargers who I feel are a species of velvet worm, mostly due to Unn being a big old slug and them living in a more tropical region. These velvet worms essentially copied the homework of the leaf sheep sea slug—which steals its ability to photosynthesize from the algae it eats.

That’s it for now!!

[evita-shelby]

20 questions for fic writers

Thanks for the tag @emotionalcadaver and @darklydeliciousdesires !!!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

38 and counting , might make it 39 when i get around to uploading Seeds on there

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

750,325

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Mainly Peaky Blinders, House of the Dragon and Masters of the Air, have written for the Inuyasha Fandom, one fic for Black Panther, game of thrones/a song of ice and fire, the Avatar cartoon series, wrote a one shot series for republic commando before i found out the writer is the jk rowling of star wars, tried a batman fanfic one time, did a one shot for pride and prejudice, did a saltburn crackfic and removed from hiatus a Silmarillion and Rings of Power fic

4. Top 5 fics by kudos

Someone will remember us :1261

Between the shadow and the soul: 623

All is bliss (in the court of aemma the great):368

You read me poetry while i wash the dishes: 229

Nothing more difficult than love: 222

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes, will take between 5 seconds or 5 days lol

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

The Knife, a one shot/epilogue for Incantatrice where Eva plans her and Luca's murder suicide after the events of the fic

7. What’s a fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

Completed on ao3, Misao of the Fire Nation where Misao and Iroh just elope instead of having the wedding their families wanted. Happiest because the fic itself was pretty low stakes

Between the shadow and the soul is a close second because it ends with Eva arriving in Veracruz with her exile finally over and the series as well. And its a good pay off after a lifetime of drama

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Yep

9. Do you write smut?

When the stars and planets align

10. Craziest crossover?

I once tried an x men/starwars/tranformers crossiver when i was 15, it was bad, i deleted it. That year i also did an inuyasha/lord of the rongs crossover

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

No?

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

No.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Also no.

14. All time favorite ship?

Elizabeth Bennett/Fitzwilliam Darcy

My favorite oc x cc ship?

Eva x Jack Nelson followed by Aemma Velaryon x Aemond Targaryen

15. What’s a fic you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

My namor x Eva fic, unless Tenoch Huerta comes back in something in costume i can't erase the thought that he look like my tio in monarchas

16. What are your writing strengths?

Character building!

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Grammer! Descriptions!

18. Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

Depends. Like i have written a fic where the dialogue is entirely in spanish and then made a seperate fic with it English because i was not gonna put translations in the og fic.

I think if it doesn't detract from the story, it should be fine, and your story should be fine if the readers skip it.(i do when its a language i can't speak or read)

19. First fandom you wrote in?

*sophia petrillo voice*: picture this, a bored eighth grader discovers quotev in keyboarding class after reading the outsiders and seen Patrick Swayze as Darry Curtis. It was actually a Sodapop Curtis x oc fic for a friend because they thought he was the hotter brother.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Shock and Delight, the hotd bridgerton inspired aemma x aemond fic

[hillerska-official]

Netflix forgot to put a tag about the show and in s2 we discover that the universe is pro m-preg…

Wille is pregnant with Simon’s baby. The Queen, who knows nothing about science, urges Wille to take a plan B. When they realize it is too late and it doesn’t work, they need to take a decision… will they stay quiet about the new heir? Will Sweden accept this new third person in line for the throne? And what will become of Simon? Will he be made to marry his ex, the newly pregnant Crown Prince Wilhelm? Will August and Sara, the new Hot Couple™️ of Hillerska become the godparents of the baby? To be continued…

What I'm learning from this ask game is that this fandom needs to write more crackfic.

Send me your unhinged fake yr2 predictions to enrich my enclosure!

[folatefangirl]

When he decides to take advantage of cheap flight tickets between Sunspear and King’s Landing, twenty-six-year-old Oberyn never intends to end up half-naked, covered in glitter, and twerking for a clubbing crowd. And yet.

[ladykakata]

Still salty about S8? Want some nonsense including eggos, Daenerys, Drogon being BEST SON and a little ‘wtf sansa u were cool until S8 bitch what happened’? Come and check out my whinging S8 Jonaerys fic, ‘A Kiss of Fire’ on AO3. Criticism most welcome, even if it’s just to go ‘Lady Kakata, please never write again, this is horrific’. Oh, except any salt about Daenerys being Worse Than Hitler. Sorry, can’t hear you over the sound of my Queen being amazing even in death.

A Kiss of Fire on AO3. Spawned by S8 being total bullshit, and this one amazing theory post that I honestly wish had happened, so I’m running with it.

[faiseuse-d-histoires]

Here I am, posting the first chapter of my crackfic, based on the incorrect quotes I made. 

Had she known what would happen this night, and all the disastrous events that would follow, Queen Daenerys Stormborn of the House Targaryen, the First of Her Name, Queen of the Andals, the Rhoynar and the First Men, Lady of the Seven Kingdoms and Protector of the Realm, Lady of Dragonstone, Queen of Meereen, Khaleesi of the Great Grass Sea, the Unburnt, Breaker of Chains and Mother of Dragons would have certainly decided to retire to bed early. VERY early.

. A crackfic AU where Daenerys had conquered King's Landing, and the King in the North desperately needs her help for the Long Night.

[soul-music-is-life]

This is what happens when you ask a smart-ass for fanfic.

[ineedminions]

Ni kar'tayl gar darasuum

A Game of Thrones/Star Wars Soulmate/Crackfic with soulmates Sansa Stark and Jango Fett and their family. Just a little fluffy slice of life fic!

https://archiveofourown.org/works/41274120

I'd like to thank @madamebaggio for always being an inspiration to me with her crossovers and inspiring me to make some of my own!!  

[ladywolfmd]

I think I want to write a multifandom crossover fic where there’s a “fantasy door” section in Monster’s Inc where the doors there lead to anywhere from Narnia to Helm’s Deep with no specific timeline. Imagine Mike and Sully opening a door and seeing Winterfell or ending up inside the Millenium Falcon 

They’d go:

Winterfell:

Mike: BOOOOOO!

Sully: ROOOOOOOAR!

Bran Stark: ... 

Arya Stark: What was that? 

Bran: I don’t know but they were beautiful. 

The Shire:

Mike: BOOOOO!

Sully: ROOOOAAAR!

Pippin: Do you want to join us for our second breakfast? 

Millenium Falcon:

Mike: BOOOOO!

Sully: ROOOOAAAR! 

Finn: AAAAAAAGH! *Hides behind Rey*

BB-8: -whirr-beep-boop-beep-

Room of Requirement:

Mike: BOOOOO!

Sully: ROOOAAAR!!!

Newt: Perfect! New species come here!

etc etc etc

Or one of the characters from behind the door finds the door to the factory and chaos when Mike and Sully mix up their doors and do a reprise of 

“Put that thing back where it came from or so help me.” 

[alfredolover119]

zukka fic rec list (post-canon)

howdy! i’ve been collecting zukka fics i like since uhhh june and now i am sharing my lists with the world. i’m splitting it into three posts so it hopefully wont be too long. this is the second one: post-canon fics! the other two will be canon era and modern au. [side note!! if youd like a specific type of rec list,, i.e. soulmate au, fake dating, ambassador sokka,, hmu and i’ll post a list !!]

within this post, the fics are in word count order! also, if you’d like a soundtrack for your reading, i might recommend my zukka playlist :^) happy reading!

speak ill by @moonsongdotmp3

-4111 words, teen

-developing/established relationship, ozai hate <3

"I hate your dad so much,” Sokka considers for a second. He tries to mix it up as often as he can when they play this game. “That I have considered starting an official petition begging Aang to reconsider his commitment to nonviolence.” // It’s quiet for a beat. He’s afraid he’s miscalculated, but Zuko laughs, broken and sincere. // (Or: 5, 8, 15 years after the war, Sokka talks shit about Ozai.)

Friends Don’t Let Friends Fake Date Each Other by @d-naggeluide

-5349 words, general

-fake dating, coming out, kinda crackfic

Toph demands that Zuko fake date her. This goes just about as well as can be expected. Sokka steps in to show them how it's done, and this goes a bit better than expected.

Oh, How We Find Our Way by @donvex

-6043 words, teen

-bed sharing, hurt/comfort, domestic fluff

In which Zuko doesn’t sleep nearly enough once he takes up the throne, and Sokka isn’t having it. And maybe they get to fall in love on the way, as a treat.

(let me be) there for you by @bisexuallsokka

-8471 words, teen

-friends/idiots to lovers, mutual pining, getting together

Sokka pulls out a clean piece of parchment and starts to write: Reasons Why Sokka Would Be A Great Bodyguard for Lord Zuko // He smiles in satisfaction at the title. Seeing it in writing only makes him feel more confident in this brilliant, two-minute-old idea of his. Zuko is one of his closest friends, and Sokka is a great fighter, he would be the perfect bodyguard! He has the entirety of his trip in the Fire Nation to prove it to Zuko. This is going to be a piece of cake.

This Isn’t My Idea of Fun by @khaleeseas​

-8921 words, explicit

-royalty/moon spirit!sokka, childhood friends to lovers, no war au, mutual pining, fluff and angst

If you asked Zuko, he and Azula saw far too much of Chief Hakoda of the Northern Water Tribe’s children growing up. It wasn’t until they were older, and Azula pointed out that - duh - their families were trying to set them all up, that he realized why. // He was told by his mother to be polite. These people were their friends and allies, and though their nations were as different as they came, harmony between nations was the most important thing. // It wasn’t his fault the Chief’s children were so annoying.

the thing about dancing by anodymalion

-9713 words, teen

-trans sokka, family angst

The first time a attendant spills Zuko’s tea and doesn’t immediately fall to her knees, begging the Fire Lord’s forgiveness, it is not anger but a resounding warmth that fills his chest.

Will You Fake Date Me (But This Time For Real)? by AlyssiaInWonderland

-10520 words, not rated (teen, i think)

-fake dating, mutual pining, idiots to lovers

Zuko is determined to convince his Uncle that he is not, in fact, pining after Sokka. // Sokka is desperate to convince Katara and Aang that he is not, in fact, pining after Suki. // When Sokka's scheme to avoid pity means Zuko and him must fake date for an entire diplomatic event, shenanigans, realisations and confessions ensue.

i could (never) give you peace by @zukkababey​

-10540 words, mature

-ambassador!sokka, friends to fwb to lovers, angst with a happy ending, miscommunication

Zuko almost said it. He almost said the words I think I’m in love with you, but he choked them back down at the last second. // Zuko would never be able to be what Sokka wanted. They might have needed each other during the summer, when two boys with too much weight on their shoulders found comfort in each other in the only way they knew how. // But now Zuko was Fire Lord, and Sokka was leaving.

Operation: Get the Fire Lord a Boyfriend by @rejectscanon 

-10679 words, teen

-established relationship, attempted matchmaking, fluff, hurt/comfort, 5+1

5 times the people of the Fire Nation tried to get Zuko and Sokka together, and 1 time they realized they already were.

a study in matchmaking by @verdanthoney​

-12218 words, general

-friends to lovers, mutual pining, idiots in love, bg bakoda and kataang

Zuko and Sokka try to play matchmaker, but things don’t go exactly as planned.

Always read Your Peace Treaties Carefully by preciousbunnynoiz

-14039 words, teen

-arranged marriage, miscommunication, found family, fluff, non-linear narrative, angst with a happy ending

Zuko and Sokka have been engaged to be married since the peace talks. Only they were the only ones who didn't know. // Everyone else thought they not only knew but that they had already been dating the entire time. // This is also news to Zuko and Sokka who have definitely NOT been dating but maybe they aren't as uninterested as they are protesting.

this love burns so yellow (becoming orange and in its time, exploding) by @meliebee​

-18767 words, teen, major character death (NOT ZUKO OR SOKKA OR ANY OF THE GAANG)

-found family, slowburn, fluff and angst, hurt/comfort, mutual pining

Ten months after Zuko is crowned at seventeen, he faces his first coup.

All the Little Things by @voidcenturyscholar and @romancedawning

-23575 words, general

-fake dating, friends to lovers, mutual pining, bed sharing, fluff, miscommunication

Sokka receives an offer of an arranged marriage from the Northern Water Tribe. On the one hand, accepting would strengthen ties between their tribes. On the other hand, Chief Arnook has suggested Hahn as a potential match, and Hahn sucks. But with the future of the Southern Water Tribe Reconstruction project relying heavily on the good will of the North, Sokka doesn’t know how to say no. // (Katara doesn’t have to deal with this. Katara is dating the Avatar.) // Zuko has a solution. Sokka just wishes he’d realized he was in love with the Fire Lord before he agreed to pretend to date him.

isn’t this the vision that you wanted by @goldrushzukka​

-34633 words, teen

-pining, matchmaking, coming out, friends to lovers, bed sharing, internalized homophobia

Firelord Zuko - ender of the Hundred Year War, ruler of the Fire Nation, payer of respects and reparations - takes advice and counsel from representatives of every nation, division, and specialty. // But teenage boy Zuko - friend of turtleducks, wielder of fun looking swords, stumbler over words and feet in the presence of cute boys - only listens to two people, and they are conspiring together to ruin him.

(do you take this jerk to be) your one and only by @jatersade​

-55855 words, teen

-enemies to friends to lovers, (not actually) unrequited love, slowburn, sharing a bed, alternate universe, arranged marriage, huddling for warmth, fluff

Under the leadership of Fire Lord Iroh, the Fire Nation has made every attempt to restore peace and make amends for the harm they inflicted during the Seventy-Year War. Their newest proposal is a literal proposal: a marriage to unite the Fire Nation and the Water Tribes. // The Fire Nation offers Prince Zuko’s hand. // The Water Tribes offer Princess Yue’s. // Sokka is apparently the only person in the world who has a problem with any of this.

Wooing the Water Tribe by @dameferre​

-56839 words, teen

-didn’t know they were dating, i mean IDIOT idiots to lovers, ambassador!sokka, mutual pining, himbos istg

Zuko is courting Katara, and with every passing day finds new and insane ways of showing that he would quite literally move the spirit world and earth to make her happy. // In hindsight, it probably would've been better if Sokka had realised he was in love with Zuko at literally any time before this. Or preferably, never fallen for his best friend in the first place.

In the Soft Light by @voidcenturyscholar and @romancedawning​

-83901 words, teen, graphic depictions of violence

-moon spirit!sokka, ambassador zuko kinda, hurt/comfort, slowburn, pining, canon divergence, miscommunication, sickfic, huddling for warmth, angst with a happy ending, enemies to lovers, underage drinking

As the newly appointed cultural liaison to Northern Water Tribe, Zuko is the first Fire Nation Citizen to step foot inside the city's walls in nearly a century. He's determined to prove himself—to the Fire Lord and to his father—even if the Water Tribe's spirit-touched prince seems to want nothing to do with him.

[ao3feed-petyrxsansa]

the boyfriend tag

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2etwdsn

by lightning16000

Modern AU/Crackfic - Sansa is a YouTuber in the early 2010's and by popular demand, she's doing the Boyfriend Tag. Petyr knows quite a bit about his sweetling, but can he answer all of the questions Sansa has found on the internet?

Words: 2281, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: Game of Thrones (TV), A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin

Rating: General Audiences

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: F/M

Characters: Petyr Baelish, Sansa Stark

Relationships: Petyr Baelish/Sansa Stark

Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Crack, Sugar Daddy, alternate universe - youtuber, Petyr is a CFO, mention of Joffrey, mention of Margaery, Dorks in Love, Petyr is a wine snob, Not Beta Read

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2etwdsn

[applesfallingfromblondehair]

This is an interesting one, let me break it down for you.

Oh babycakes, we know. We know you have a uniform.

Okay this is a bit of a stretch but I *think* it's the tracksuit from this video that he's talking about.

This is such hot bullshit and I think you all should read the crackfic I co-wrote last year about it, you can find it here.

Last but not least: we love a gruff Scotsman who is close to his roots. Well done you big himbo, what a solid press interview you gave about a series of things you do not give a fuck about and then managed to come up with one thing you actually do give a fuck about.

We love you, never change.

(Or actually, please do change, I loved you more three years ago.)