#gaius is the worst
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Merlin rewatch -- S2E3: The Nightmare Begins
Gaius is the worst
I hated Gaius so much in this. Not just the gaslighting but also how full of self-righteousness he was while his gaslighting was clearly failing already. Morgana's nightmare clearly hadn't stopped since s1e13 and her magic was leaking so obviously. He still thought drugging her was effective? “ I’ve taken good care of her”?She already recognised his own magic. “ (gaslighting Morgana) For good reason”? It's obvious the secrecy only fueled the outburst of her magic. The fact that Morgana told Merlin about her magic should prove that Gaius’ method couldn’t even keep her mouth shut. It’s good that she found Merlin. What if she ran into someone whose mouth wasn’t that tight?
Gaius just didn’t want to help. Merlin proposed so many ways that didn’t concern Gaius. Druid is a valid option. Uther wasn’t actively raiding druid camps at the moment. (Merlin failed because the plan was rubbish, not because going to the druid was a bad idea) And frankly, Gaius was the person who could talk to Morgana with the least risk! He used to practice magic so it makes sense that he had the knowledge. If Morgana could be more in control, there wouldn’t be more of this kind of ‘accident’ that put Uther into witch-hunting mode. If he’s that scared of getting into trouble, fair. What annoyed me was that he acted like he knew best. “ I will (take care of Morgana). As I’ve always done.” Drugging and gaslighting don’t count. “ What makes you think that you know better than me?” Merlin knew much much better thank you.
The second confrontation between them was not bad since Merlin stood up for himself and Gaius did get his point in the end. I’m still a bit mad that Gaius used “ people’s lives are at risk” to scold him. If Morgana didn’t lose control Uther wouldn’t start to arrest people in the first place. Also I’m never convinced that Gaius taught Merlin about ‘ the good in magic and the right way of using it’. I’m sure Hunith gave him that impression too if that adorable fire dragon was anything to go by. And Kilgharah was the one to tell him about his destiny. Merlin also used magic to save Gaius at the very beginning. He always knew to use it for good. I guess Gaius did provide him company, a people to counsel with and the fatherly love. But that’s not the same.
How I wish the episode ended at the lovely Merlin & Arthur scene. Why did Merlin have to apologise to Gaius? He did do some stupid things but it’s not like Gaius was personally affected. If Gaius was willing to help Merlin wouldn’t have to act alone. Gaius saying “ it’s not your fault. You were only doing what you thought was right.” seemed to indicate that he was correct about keeping Morgana in the dark, which is frustrating. At least Merlin did reply “We both were”...
[S2E3] [other episodes]
#merlin rewatch 2024#bbc merlin#rewatch: the nightmare begins#gaius#merlin and gaius#gaius is the worst
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Obsessed with that bit where P— told John to be a bad wizard. That they could write the history books later to say he was good, but what he needed to do now was to scare the shit out of people. What he needed was leverage.
Because that's what he did! That's exactly what he did. He got his leverage, he played the bad wizard, he scared the shit out of everyone. And then after the dust settled, when he was the last man standing, he wrote the history books to say he was good.
And like. The thing that gets me is. After all that, he named her Pyrrha.
They won. It wasn't worth it.
#like it's not P—'s fault John took her advice so to heart and cornered himself at the end the way he did#but talk about people bringing out the worst in one another#the world that could have been if John had listened to C— as closely as he listened to P— and the nun#the locked tomb#nona the ninth#ntn spoilers#pyrrha dve#emperor john gaius#john gaius
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So little comment on Gaius’ cowardice and manipulative behavior. I do think most of them stem from him being a plot device most of the time, but it still often irritates me.
Do you think the writers realized that the way Gaius was flipping back and forth between "Merlin you're overreacting/seeing things that aren't there/trying to change the future" and "Merlin the situation is dire/this is definitely what's happening/you alone must do this ~dangerous~ thing"
Combined with the way he is a known sorcerer, not only to the court but to the king, kept like the other magical artifacts for times of injury to the royal family that his magic might be useful
Combined with the way this man picks and chooses when to help magic users escape Camelot unharmed or when to stand by and see them captured/killed
Combined with the way he gaslights the shit out of morgana even after he knows Merlin and Morgana know of her powers
That it All equates to a massively manipulative person????? He's doing everything he can to survive, damn the very real shit going on around him. Oh what's the best course of action for another child of magic born to the same lady Vivienne who's first child you snuck out of camelot? Keep her in the dark, keep her fearful and unaware of her dreams and her powers, but yeah she's Evil now because she chooses to see the good in magic and the evil in the king for killing it (which is just another plot issue but whatever nows not the time).
We can only imagine what Camelot looked like in the days of the dragons and all other magic kind, probably a lot healthier, more vibrant, more prosperous. Nevermind that Gaius got to spend his whole youth with that prosperity, Morgana (and Merlin) surely can't miss something she never had!!!!!!!!!!!
And Merlin! Sure he takes Hunith and Balinor's boy in, because he needs an apprentice, because the circumstances line up, because destiny, whatever the reason. And he cares about Merlin's life enough to sacrifice himself multiple times (only because Merlin is Emrys the god among men, immortal, sworn to serve Arthur the once and future king for all of time) But he does not really help Merlin in the following ten years. The boy who came to Camelot, the opinions he held, the care he had for others, that boy is lost or warped more like through years of Gaius' (and Kilgharrah before they just like changed his personality) careful commentary undermining Merlins beliefs and changing his actions. Then when said actions obviously work out poorly(think, self fulfilling prophecy episodes, episodes where Merlin is convinced to outright lie to Arthur's face, etc) then it's Merlins fault and Gaius is there to comfort him and then they share a funny little moment and everything's fine !!!
Like, did the writers mean to write it like this because ho-ly shit! That's how it reads every single episode. Merlin the young warlock would not have done these things. The boy he was in season one? When confronted with admitting his magic(the thing he was so self conscious of, but so proud of at the same time) or lying to Arthur to his face he would have spoken the truth. Gaius (and Kilgharrah) turned him into a man deceitful manipulative tool, bent on controlling Arthur without ever telling him the truth and letting him make his own mind.
Because that Arthur, the Arthur of season one, would have taken in the knowledge of both Merlin his friend, and morgana his sister, and stood up for them, helped keep them safe, accepted them and their magic. That Arthur clearly loved morgana and Merlin above all else, even though he struggled with saying it, he proved it in his actions. Merlin (through his mentors) TURNs Arthur from magic, when he was willing to save Mordred, willing to sympathize with magic users, to see their worth, to spare them if they did not commit crimes, willing to accept the help of a foreign mage in the caves, and willing to question his father To!! His !! Face!! About the knights code.
You're telling me Merlin would forget about these things, would lie to Arthur that Morgause lied, when he could have just said, hey she showed you your mum, but killing your dad isn't the answer. How FUCKING hard would that have been? This show made Merlin a bad guy, a man against his own kind. that's the real tragedy. Merlin, emrys, would never do these things in season one. He had to be convinced by his mum not to tell Arthur after will died. He was willing to share. The show themselves didn't want it, because it provided comedy(how does Arthur not see!!1!) And angst (how does Arthur not see !?!)
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It’s been slow going so I give wip of that Merlin Au I keep promising
1 page out of the Many
#I am redrawing the whole Merlin + Gaius introductory scene and am having the worst best time of my life#absolutely wonderful experience. never want to do it again. can’t wait til next time#my art#star trek#spock#bones mccoy
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"Kiriona", when she's all smug and comfy in the barracks: "Ummm ackshully, I'm not Gideon, I'm Crown Prince Kirionaahhh, The first lieutenant of the cohort and heir to the Emperorrrrr. >:3"
Gideon, reverting to the truth the instant Crux reminds her of her past: "I HATE YOU! I'M A PRINCESS NOW DID YOU KNOW THAT?!? IM BETTER THAN YOU!? LOOK AT EVERYTHING I ACHIEVED! LOOK AT EVERYTHING I AM!! ACKNOWLEDGE IT!!"
And then Crux just doesn't. He still sees her for what he saw her as before. Chattel, her body parts written off for the ninth house.
That's gotta crush her, to her very core. To the extremely fragile shell she's built around what's left of her battered sense of self.
I think Gideon built up this Kiriona shield as a coping mechanism for being abused throughout her entire childhood, only to lose her love and friend via sacrificing herself, only for said friend to reject her flesh and her end.
She's a corpse. She's literally not alive. She's a revenant, zombie shit. As the back of the first book alludes to, Gideon is sick of all this undead nonsense...
And that's exactly what she is now, undead nonsense.
Poor baby needs a reality check, some reassurance, and someone to please stitch up those fucking holes. I can't believe John didn't fix her fucking holes what the hell is wrong with him?
#worst dad of the year award goes to John Gaius!#the locked tomb#gideon nav#nona the ninth spoilers#nona the ninth#kiriona gaia#kiriona the first#gideon the ninth#tlt#harrowhark nonagesimus#tlt spoilers#tlt brainrot#the locked tomb series#harrow the ninth#harrowhark#poor babe needs a real parent smfh
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imagine ianthe's suffering rn. its so funny to me. girl all u wanted was power and i respect that but turns out that the side effect of power isnt the moral implications or whatever, its dealing with god's personal drama.
#ianthe/john dynamic is so fascinating and amusing to me.#theyre equally awful in such different ways#post-htn especially.#ianthe's so much for the grind for the power of it all yknow. theres only one person she cares about really.#and she has to deal with the most powerful guy ever being just a very sad very lonely wet kitty of a person.#i imagine at some point the (toxic codependant) instincts kick in and she starts like. genuinely caring for him#in the way she cares for people. which is by endlessly tormenting them#and he starts caring for her the way he cares for people which i can only assume is by constantly asking her if she hates him#theyre both the worst. they can be the worst together.#the locked tomb#tlt#ianthe tridentarius#ianthe the first#saint of awe#htn#htn spoilers#harrow the ninth#john gaius
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I had this comic(?) idea
#Is this the worst thing you saw today or what#natm#night at the museum#natm octavius#natm jedediah#jedtavius#jedediah and octavius#mlp#my little pony#fanart#art#traditional art#comic#mini comic#suggestive#kinda#the dialogue is suggestive but thats all#i hate my mind#gaius octavius#jedediah smith
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I feel like the prevailing fandom opinion rn is that Alecto Is Just Angry i.e. "implacable or unceasing anger" but I keep thinking about this quote and how John totally glosses over his own anger-as-besetting-sin while basically condemning Alecto's, and. hm.
idk. thinking about how Alecto's actual in text reaction (via Harrow) to her own death/remaking was more like... despair? disapointment? "I still love you"? something about how Alecto must have woken up after her death, unwillingly new and hurting with it and the only other thing left in existence was someone who was so angry that he killed billions of people and also the entire solar system just to try (and fail!) to prevent a few hundred (?) trillionares from running away. thinking about soul permeability. "She was a monster the moment you resurrected her, and you went and made her worse"
#congrats lil buddy that's the worst anyone's ever done it#john gaius#alecto#tlt thoughts#trb.txt#much too think about#not sure if im Saying It here but ive been awake since 4am. send post.
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One of the many things I find funny and irritating is the slant of a lot of interpretations of Alecto's name (that it's about feminine rage)--on this here wlw internet in the year of our lord 2024, it's easily made to figure as rage against God, or rage against patriarchy, or religious oppression, and therefore an allusion to the idea that she's going to get her vengeance on John for betraying and oppressing her somehow, but like
John is the one who named her Alecto. He's the one who named her that. So, naming her "Alecto" is alluding to the embodiment of John's rage--their rage, since they are joined inseparably (John even explicitly says that when he first perceives her: "You wouldn't stop screaming. You were so scared. You were so goddamn mad").
He says of Alecto to Harrow, "In a very real way, you are [Alecto's] children". At a very surface level, Alecto is (depending on the text or tradition), one of the Furies--famously, in several surviving Greek tragedies, who punish Orestes for the crime of killing his mother. In fact, in Aeschylus' Oresteia, they declare that they are specifically bound to avenge matricide.
So the name "Alecto" alludes to the nature of John's mission and how he sees it.
It also implies that his divine rage, the rage that gives him power, the power that makes him divine, that he either represents or wants to represent, is feminine rage. He was chosen by Earth (which, Furies are sometimes the daughters of Gaia); he is her champion, however he's managed to fuck that up. Once the truth of that comes out, it becomes clear that all of his power comes from her.
And that's why you get statements from Tamsyn Muir like:
“[T]he God of the Locked Tomb IS a man; he IS the Father and the Teacher; it’s an inherently masc role played by someone who has an uneasy relationship himself to playing a Biblical patriarch. John falls back on hierarchies and roles because they’re familiar even when he’s struggling not to. Even he identifies himself as the God who became man and the man who became God. But the divine in the Locked Tomb is essentially feminine on multiple axes – I think Nona will illuminate that a little bit more."
So yes, he plays the role of Emperor and God and Teacher, with all of the things that implies. And I don't think it should be discounted. But he also is (and partly sees himself as) the chosen champion of a goddess, or what is for all intents & purposes for a human like him a goddess. He is her avenger, and while she sleeps, her avatar.
And I don't think we're meant to read him purely as a parasite who's taking advantage of her to gain power for himself, either. Or an oppressive, Kronos-like figure. Especially if you consider Palamedes' theory of the Grand Lysis, even if he was purely motivated by desire for power before (which I really doubt), there are parts of each in the other, now. What was clear and separate before is uncertain and interpenetrated. Is his rage his own, or hers? Is his mission of revenge his, or hers? If he wants power, is that his own selfishness, or her desire to survive?
And does it matter?
#the locked tomb#tlt meta#john gaius#i really wish there wasn't such an intense desire to find the worst possible interpretations of johns' actions#because like. they're plenty hurtful on their own! they're plenty shitty!#there IS however something tamsyn muir is trying to express through the series and it's fairly complicated-otherwise it wouldn't be a serie#and i don't think it actually helps us to turn john into a cardboard cutout labeled 'evil'#or apply tropes we've marinated in from radfem-informed segments of online wlw culture about how men are parasites on the Divine Feminine#or apply the messages of other shows with a big emphasis on queer and wlw themes--like spop--to something that just fundamentally isn't the#there is more than one way to talk about lesbian religious trauma and there is more than one narrative around it#and more than one perspective on it#i wish that people would try harder to experience the story on its own terms
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I am so sorry
#i now rest easy knowing forever that i reached my lowest point today#the locked tomb#gideon the ninth#harrow the ninth#emperor john gaius#i am so. so. so. sorry.#i feel dirty.#this is the perfect worst post i have ever made#chris pratt babs was one thing#but this...
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Merlin rewatch -- S2E10: Sweet Dreams
Gaius is so unhelpful!
It's not Merlin's job to stop Arthur from pursuing a foreign lady, but fine. They hadn't suspected sorcery yet so Gaius could be less motivated. But then they discovered the love spell, and Gaius didn't seem to help the research at all? And not until the last minute did he urge Merlin to go to Kilguarrah. I get that a lot of it was plot device but it still infuriated me.
[S2E10] [other episodes]
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And then Augustine is embracing him, just as he has done countless times before. His arms wrap tightly around his shoulders and he presses his face into Johns neck. And then he sobs “you killed joy” into John’s ear. And for a moment John is living ten thousand different lifetimes at once. And they stand next to him in every single one, M- and A-, Mercymorn the first and Augustine the first, joy and patience, side by side again and again and again. And in ten thousand lifetimes they’ve only ever agreed with each other twice. And it scared the shit out of John both times. And that’s when he realizes that the three of them have hated and loved each other for millennia and no matter what they forget, no matter what he does to them. It will always be Mercymorn and Augustine, together, disagreeing and spitting and shouting and glaring and on opposite sides but always, always together. And he loves them, John loves them. But hes already lost them both. When John killed Mercy, he killed them both. They were like binary stars, they only ever really worked when the other was also there. He was clinging to a man already half dead. And they are being dragged down and down together. And for a moment John thinks that this might finally be how it ends. Him and Augustine and Mercy. Together. How it was supposed to happen that very first time.
But just like that very first time, they get to go together and John is left behind. And it’s not fair and it never was and now it never will be.
#the locked tomb#tlt#tlt spoilers#gideon the ninth#harrow the ninth#nona the ninth#john gaius#mercymorn the first#augustine the first#jod tlt#mercymorn cristabel#they make me want to eat glass#welcome to the worlds worst polycule#polycule so toxic it literally ended worlds#I love them#they make me so sad#sorry for giant post and tags
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merlin accidentally turns himself into a cat au where gaius enlists lancelot to help cover for merlin’s sudden absence while they work on a reversal when merlin can’t actually speak to say the spell and gaius isn’t powerful enough to perform it and somehow merlin ends up becoming arthur’s temporary therapy cat because he took one look into the bright amber eyes of this fuzzy vulnerable little creature and decides he absolutely needs a secret pet and merlin has to suffer in silence as arthur scratches his little chin and goes on and on about how infuriatingly fond he is of his useless but amazingly brave, kind, and funny manservant
#bbc merlin#merlin#arthur pendragon#sir lancelot#gaius#merlin au#merlin as a cat: oh my god this is the worst thing that’s ever happened to me#merlin still a cat and snuggled close to arthur’s chest while purring: i might have to reconsider
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All joking aside though, I absolutely hate hate hate how much of Gideon's new identity revolves around her father. I Get It bc I mean she has nothing else left and she basically spent her life dreaming about being the daughter of someone important, but my god I miss the Gideon at the end of Harrow. It just seems like her entire moral compass was turned around because The Worst People in The Universe gave her two scraps of positive attention.
#again i get it#i understand how she got there#but i just cannot stand kiriona gaia#she is objectively still gideon and there's still softeness in her but my god#the worst way to be a daddy's girl#i miss my girl#gideon nav#kiriona gaia#tlt#ntn#tlt meta#the locked tomb#nona the ninth#john gaius
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Au where Silas somehow ended up becoming a lyctor at the end of HtN too and John and the crew are all like okay this kid straight up sucks
#he is super judgmental of all the remaining original lyctors#augustine like well he's from the house YOU founded joy#only person there silas is respectful to is john but it's like weird hyper religious respect and silas is convinced this is all a test#harrow and ianthe are also there still and it's just the worst#john isn't even trying to make them get along with silas though#harrow is so clearly john's favorite and silas is just vibrating like a small angry dog#mercy tries to throw silas out an airlock#the locked tomb#harrowhark nonagesimus#john gaius#silas octakiseron#mercymorn the first#augustine the first#ianthe tridentarius#i know i go overboard with tags but it's habit sorry rftgyhu#harrow the ninth
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[towards the end of htn]
ianthe: how did you come back? mercymorn just killed you!
god: oh, ianthe. gamers don't die. they respawn.
#this is the worst thing i have ever posted.#tlt#the locked tomb#tlt spoilers#htn spoilers#harrow the ninth spoilers#htn#harrow the ninth#tlt incorrect quotes#ianthe tridentarius#ianthe the first#john gaius#mercymorn the first
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