#fuuuuuuuuuuuu

[kithtaehyung]

“flower field, that’s where i’m at.” ⤷ wild flower (with youjeen) - rm

[drifting-pieces-blog-blog]

Masking in the Duat

Or: Unmasking Marc Spector.

The biggest difference we are meant to see between Marc and Steven is the fact that Steven is so open and expressive. When we first meet Marc, he is glaring, stone faced, and so stiff. He is a rock and Steven is water.

In reality, Marc is sand. Slowly breaking down beneath the brutal winds that have been beating at him all his life.

As the show progresses, we see Marc have little breakthroughs of exasperation, irritation, stress, and anger. An eye roll, a twitch of the lips, and pulling away to reset.

We see his exhausted and extreme control to control everything about his emotions. We see him fidget. We see his fingers twitch. We see him sigh and run his hands over his hair.

Ticks or someone that has been taught not to stim. Not to draw attention. Not to show weakness.

When he was younger, he probably bounced his legs till he was chastised to stop. He probably would vocal stim till he was told his voice was too much. He probably excitedly flapped his hands over his favorite show until he started to get hit.

This right here? This is a reset. A lapse in control that he catches and controls. We see it the most around Layla.

The peaks behind the curtain. The way she moves her hands when he starts to close in on himself. His hands are together pressed so tightly in on himself. Look at the way she moves to touch his fingers rather than holding him still or clasping his hands into a cage. She does this while watching his face so intently. She knows. She is opening him up, encouraging him to stim. To touch her fingers. To move.

Even here, when we first see him, cold and trying his best to be intimidating while frustrated. He knows he fucked up here. He knows he fucked up real bad and he isn't smart enough to fix it.

It's the way he settles into that spot. The shift. It's a small shift in feet. A shift from someone that used to walk a little differently. Someone used to the off balance and toe step. A step that has been drilled out of them.

Even just his eyes, intimidating, but honestly a stare that is locked and scared. Look at his arms slowly settle into that "standing man" position he's so good at. He's halfway debating on trying to pretend to be Steven. You can see it in the way his face shifts JUST the smallest bit around the jaw.

Even here. He's in so much pain physically and emotionally. His lips are SO pulled tight. He's probably been tortured before. Used to pain. Used to being hit. Used to hiding how much something hurts. He's breathing through it and rembering his training.

But he's tired and his system stability has been compromised by this point and he's been fighting Steven up to this point (and probably Jake who probably has thoughts about this situation).

The way he goes from full grimace to exhale to a perfectly calm face. He knows how to mask to the extreme.

So what is this? And of course....

Marc is unable to mask in the Duat. Not just because of the extreme stress he is under or the fact that he is dead.

I have a few theories on why:

Being dead, he has no body and has lost the fine control he has gained over the years. Before he could feel the need to express himself and his muscles would shut it down automatically. A sort of self preservation and natural response he has honed over the years.

This of course means that in their head space, he is also unable to mask. Remember the first time he spoke to Steven? The frustration in his voice as he demanded that Steven stop looking? Even when he's seen in the reflections, you see more of Marc's expressions than when he has the body.

2. He is being judged on the boat and being prevented from masking. The duat is seeing his true self to balance on the scales. All those who pass through, might lose the ability to hide themselves. Those who are evil are more evil and easy to see. So here, Marc's true feelings are exposed. His worries, his frustrations, his confusion, his utter reliance on Steven to tend to his emotional state.

In the scene here, Marc's hand is fidgeting and twitching. Many times when Steven is explaining things to Marc in the Duat, we see Marc look to him with utter trust, adoration, and eagerness. He is unable to hide how he feels about Steven. Not the irritation or impatience he showed in the real world, but kindness and love.

Here, we see the real Marc Spector. The real reason why his scales balanced.

A theory on why he was suddenly worthy when Steven went over the edge? All of Marc's love for Steven was realized. It wasn't because he was suddenly 'whole' or 'singular'. But because he was seen to care for Steven. To do everything for Steven. He himself suddenly realized how much he needed Steven and depended on him. (just one of the theories that avoids the implied able-ism that could be taken away from the scene because I am hopeful and want to see the good in Marc and in why he was worthy).

3. He has been separated from his head-mates. Steven, who is his emotional protector is not there to help him reign in his extreme emotions. Jake, who is (in my headcannon) gate keeper and physical protector, is not there to save him and keep away the more harmful memories.

Not to say that Jake or Steven keep Marc masked, but more along the lines of they help Marc not get overwhelmed in certain situations.

4. Mirroring. This is an unfamiliar situation. He has lost his body. He has been separated from Jake and Steven as mentioned above. He is exhibiting the ultimate form of masking, by copying the energy of those around him. He has the same excitement that Steven has. The same open face and more so: When with Harrow, he shuts down and pushes out the same cool exterior while desperately trying to figure out what Harrow wants and how to please him so he can get out of the situation. Something he probably did a lot with his mother. What can he do and display to appease her so she won't hurt him.

Ironically, when Marc mirrors Steven, it shows his true side and we get to see who Marc really is under his gruff exterior: A kind and loving man.

A man that needs someone to see him. To really see him. Who has been afraid his whole life of people seeing the real him while also desperately wishing to be understood.

He still masks once resurrected and out of the Duat, but we see him smile, really smile, when he sees that Layla is alright. We hear the joy in his voice when talking to Steven. We see the fear when he doesn't understand what happened when Jake saved them.

We even see how his face twists and contorts when faced with killing Harrow with Layla and Steven there.

He is a man that does not have to be seen as the cold killer. He is starting to understand that he has found his safe people. People that maybe...just maybe... He can trust enough to be vulnerable and open around. People he can love.

[leofrith]

need to read a book to work past my writer's block vs. my inability to pick a book

[quanblovk]

*sends in more knights*

The knights duke it out! It's a full on battle royale!

Morpho retreats and grabs a bowl of popcorn from out of nowhere. They don't even like popcorn!

Galacta Knight plows through the crowd with his lance, sending them all flying.

Dark Meta Knight summons copies of himself and kicks a lot of ass.

Meta Knight spins into a whirlwind, creating a powerful tornado that attacks everything around it.

The knights were all quickly defeated! Leaving a Quan in danger once again.

[oopsydaisyjohnson]

Safe and Sound (Taylor's Version) transported me right back to my 14 year old self in high school, listening the track on repeat while reading Hunger Games in class for a "school assignment" for English.

[bitchesofostwick]

jedi survivor only available for xbox on series s/x…guess who does not have a series x…because they are never fucking available to buy…

[yther]

is it very warm or did I forget my antibiotics for the last 3 days

[redjaybird]

[gosh take my guts away from me]

[themurphybrownshow]

"well every time i go in there i piss her off so im not gonna help"

[mephestopheles]

Let's just say I'm at this part of Oathbringer

[slushrottweiler]

KIREHN! BABE! SWEETIE!

Something about angels

[spotsupstuff]

went on to get some of my playlist pics updated/in order :)

after vs before

[pikahlua]

Today on this day when there's a real possibility of a Katsuki update in the spoilers, all I can think about is that one time I was like, "Bad shit is gonna happen to Katsuki I feel it in my heart, but like, despite all the death flags...he won't DIE right? This is MHA after all! No, surely it must be something else hahaha. He'll have a completely reversible death. OH POSSESSION! THAT MAKES SENSE! That has to be what it is!" and then he fucking died just like I feared but was too scared to entertain.

That really fucking happened??

[teapoliceweewooweewoo]

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[eepyohs]

HOW DO YOU REMOVE AN ASK YOU SENT FRICK

[i-ran-into-a-lampost]

Wtf why am I getting like a new bot following me everyday