#funny taco shirt

[magdy258]

"I’m Just Here for the Tacos" Fun Graphic T-Shirt T-Shirt

A cozy unisex lightweight crewneck sweatshirt with the witty phrase 'I'M just here for the tacos' printed on the front. Perfect for taco lovers looking for a comfortable and stylish way to show their love for this popular food. Ideal for casual outings, hanging out with friends, or lounging at home. Great for Taco Tuesday celebrations and Cinco de Mayo festivities.

Product features - 100% ring-spun cotton fabric for durability and comfort - 1x1 ribbed cuffs and bottom hem for a well-fitted look - Shoulder and neck tape for added stability - Seamless design for a clean finish and reduced fabric waste - Relaxed fit and light fabric for all-day comfort

Care instructions - Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F) - Do not bleach - Tumble dry: low heat - Iron, steam or dry: low heat - Do not dryclean

Get it now from here

[johnnydany]

Feed Me Tacos And Tell Me I'm Pretty T-Shirt

Get yours here: https://www.teepublic.com/t-shirt/37649476-feed-me-tacos-and-tell-me-im-pretty

[ryaartt]

Now available on my teepublic!

[winfredsdesigns]

(via taco themed sticker or shirt taco hell Active T-Shirt by winfredsDesigns)

taco hell is opened for buisness lol anyone who has eaten this over the counter laxitive knows exactly what im talking about lol. been in a goofy mood today so yall get a goofy shirt hahah 

[meccentric]

Sorry to add to your post with my silly little experience but I had no idea the trump deification was a thing until I saw a "TRUMP IS JESUS" T-Shirt being sold at a public event in town. I was deeply, deeply appalled. And not because I am Christian but just for the incredible hypocrisy.

donald trump has been shot in the ear at a rally it's so over folks

[dazzlesizzle]

Check out the new product Let's Taco 'bout It Humorous https://www.redbubble.com/i/t-shirt/Guac-Taco-and-Roll-Fiesta-by-Dazzle-Sizzle/159376631.WFLAH?asc=u

[toruandmidori]

TACOS FOR LIFE!

Make every day a Taco Tuesday with our new funny, foodie t-shirts. 

Great gifts for foodie friends this Christmas: 

SHOP

[kacpi-design]

"Good Bless Tacos" celebrates Mexican culture and its iconic street food, honoring the influence on Tex-Mex cuisine and the rich history of Mesoamerica.

[collegefootballcountdown]

Taco Tuesday T Shirt on Amazon

[magdy258]

Taco Lover Lightweight Sweatshirt

A cozy unisex lightweight crewneck sweatshirt with the witty phrase 'I'M just here for the tacos' printed on the front. Perfect for taco lovers looking for a comfortable and stylish way to show their love for this popular food. Ideal for casual outings, hanging out with friends, or lounging at home. Great for Taco Tuesday celebrations and Cinco de Mayo festivities.

Product features - 100% ring-spun cotton fabric for durability and comfort - 1x1 ribbed cuffs and bottom hem for a well-fitted look - Shoulder and neck tape for added stability - Seamless design for a clean finish and reduced fabric waste - Relaxed fit and light fabric for all-day comfort

Care instructions - Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F) - Do not bleach - Tumble dry: low heat - Iron, steam or dry: low heat - Do not dryclean

Get it now from here

[johnnydany]

Feed Me Tacos And Tell Me I'm Pretty Shirt

Get yours here: https://www.teepublic.com/t-shirt/37648691-feed-me-tacos-and-tell-me-im-pretty

[waywardmillennial]

Ryan Bergara really is the most guy ever. he loves basketball and sneakers. he's scared of the ghosts he hunts for a living but he loves watching horror movies. he had a taco bell truck at his wedding reception. he's obsessed with theme parks. he nicknamed his dog the "pee pee man" - and it makes total sense. he has a love/hate relationship with his coworker, who is a fuzzy blue puppet. buttons on a shirt are only mild suggestions to him now. his sense of humor is like a frat bro, laughing at fart compilations. he wants to meet an alien. he makes up the most random phrases that no one in the history of the english language had ever thought of before. he discovers his allergies while on camera. he made an mcu cameo. he can't pronounce February. he has anxiety because he thinks what he makes isn't good enough, even though you can see all the hard work and attention he puts into every project he's in. he's bizarre and he's complex (affectionate). he's funny and he's weird. and he's one of the best humans on the planet!

[laelelinae]

please do twin dad!kuroo hcs

Have a good day/night

Twin dad Kuroo HC!

Not proof read!

HUHUHU I LOVE THIS!! GONNA MAKE A LITTLE BONUS!

Working on the rest of your requests soon💞💞

when he first found out your pregnant (you surprised him) he literally flew out from the sofa like IT WAS SO FUNNY

Literally started celebrating and jumping around hugging you,spinning you around 😭

LMFAO PROBABLY TOLD KENMA AND KENMA WAS LIKE “oh so you did the taco and burrito” (ykyk. 😣)

He surely went to pregnancy checkups,did your cravings together,always service you and just comforts you when your sick🫶🏻

But the thing is..he noticed your belly was WAYY bigger then how normal pregnancy bellies

Soo..when one of the checkups..

“Congrats ma’am ,you have twins”

His jaw DROPPED to the GROUND!!

He was literally jumping around like a literal rabbit ,telling everyone.

After knowing is twins instead of one child ,probably went more intense caring about you.

Soo..during the gender reveal party..well iconic,it was a cake

Kenma was holding his laugh in for some reason (docs told Kenma about the gender)

Honestly kuroo didn’t mind any gender in general ,is his and yours kid. He would just love them to death.

And..when you cut the cake..it was pinks AND blue?!

Boy,Kenma laughed like a monkey💀and he said

“Is a boy and a girl”

KUROO FUCKING FLEW OUT OF HAPPINESS ONG.

..okay after months of literal hell,you gave birth and Kuroo was holding his shit in to not cry.

. . . .

After a few years,your kids are 5 years old now!

And the boy surely was more attached to you yet he loves his dad,and the girl surely was attached to Kuroo more

Kuroo has tea parties and dresses up as a princess with your daughter AWWW!😭🫶🏻🫶🏻

He probably plays volleyball with your son,sometimes your daughter if she’s willing to.

Doesn’t have favorite,loves both equally a LOT.

Spoils the kids so much you lecture Kuroo about it

They have their own room with their favorite color (kuroo took HOURS to decorate them and make them good)

Brings the two to get ice cream often😭

Probably brings them to parks and his friends volleyball matches

His friends loves them :) (not the Drake way)

ESPECIALLY HINATA AND KENMA(SURPRISINGLY?!)

Made your kids called Kenma their uncle!! (Lowkey Kenma felt proud)

Honestly didn’t want to watch the kids grow up,he loved them running around the house.

OH YEAH!! The girls first word was papa and the boy was “mama” LMFAO

Always gives the best surprise to your kids,your kids loves your dad and Kuroo loves them too <333

BUTT when they were teenagers !! (13)

The type to say “no girlfriends or boyfriends till your 30”

“Dad,what the hell” THATS ALL HE GOT IN RESPOND

The type to also say “back in my days!!😔”

Whenever your not home,probably eats the most unhealthiest shit ever with them

Probably owns a “best dad ever shirt” AND A FUCKING MUG

The type to make dad jokes 👎

Probably tells his son about his teenage years in secret since his daughter probably does not gaf

Your son is probably more calm and mature but has a silly side and your daughter has a more bold and silly girl in general yk?

Leaves the daughter to you once she hits puberty yk? Girls girls <3

Probably practice volleyball with the two often!

Whenever Kuroo brought some stuff home from groceries and your kids try them and say like “oh ! This js pretty good dad!”

Next day,he buys PACKS of them 💀

When you guys were just all in the living room together he randomly mentioned how hard it was to ask you out on the date

And your daughter went like “of course dad,your a literal loser and mom is a literal goddess”

Your son calmly agreed 💀

He was SO OFFENDED!!

He would still pick them up even when they are in middle school,he sometimes would drive them to school!

Probably might not be the most emotional support father but he tries his best! <3

Literally would beat up that person if they ever make fun of your kid 💀

Goes on morning runs with your son whenever he can

Your kid still love their “uncle” kenma LMFAO

And your so glad kuroo gets along really well with your kids <3

Oh god you just love them 😭

[ythankucaptainmccoy]

The Cowgirl and The Aviator Ch5

The next chapter baby! I posted this with a heavy heart as one of my cats died today. RIP Fives I'll always miss you. @smoothdogsgirl I will admit that I listened to How To Train Your Dragon Romantic Flight on repeat while writing this and it shows at one point ;) WARNINGS: Blowjob and Pussy Eating/Fingering

Jake wakes and realizes during the night he had tucked you into his chest and that your rear was firmly pressed against him. He was trying to go back to sleep when you made a small whimper and moved brushing your ass against him. That’s when he realized he was hard as a rock. As much as he wanted to stay in bed with you he also wanted to surprise you with breakfast. He willed himself to get up where he went to the bathroom to take care of his problem. After taking care of himself and washing his hands he went to the kitchen.

When you wake you’re alone in Jake’s bed, but you can already smell the food. You make your way to the kitchen where Jake has his back turned to you trying to fix a plate of food. You walk up and wrap your arms around his waist. He tenses at first until he realizes it’s you. You place a kiss on his back and relish in the way he shudders. “Darlin’ I’m tryin’ to make breakfast”, he drawls. His voice is a little gravely from sleep, and it makes you smile. 

You pull away as he fills the two plates he had set out. The food looks delicious as he sets the two plates on the kitchen table. You take a bite and moan with how good it tastes. Jake sits there, food halfway to his mouth, but looking at you as you take another bite of food. He is so turned on right now it isn’t funny, but he wants to take this slow. He might have to make another bathroom trip if you keep making those noises. 

“What’s wrong Jake?”, you say, trying to play innocent. “How’s your breakfast?”, he asks, shoveling food into his mouth so he doesn’t say anything dirty. “It’s amazing”, you reply. He beams with pride as he finally starts to eat. “So Bradley said you all have a mission coming up”, you say. “Yeah it should be pretty simple”, he tells you. “I know you can’t promise anything in your line of work, but try to come back in one piece”, you say.

“I’ll try my best darlin’”, he replies. After finishing breakfast Jake says something about going for a run. “Well I’ll head back and take a shower then get ready to lounge around”, you say. You watch as he gets ready to head out for a run and head to Bradleys apartment. This time when you get there Bradleys fuckbuddy is still there. You shower and get dressed as quickly as you can then leave. You were at a total loss of what to do when a text came through. ‘I know we are supposed to be taking things slow, but how about taking you out to lunch’ Jake’s text reads. 

‘Sure what time and where. I was going to run some minor errands today’ you text back. ‘How about noon at the taco place there by the base. I’ll send you the address’, he responded. ‘Sounds great’ you say. Sure enough not even two minutes later Jake has texted you the address. It’s only nine so you have some time to kill. You decide to go to an outlet mall where you buy some jean shorts, some tank tops, t-shirts and some work out shorts. 

You continue to walk down the sidewalk when a storefront window catches your eye. It was a lingerie store and an idea popped into your head. You quickly made your way inside and looked at the selection. One grabbed your attention. It was a two piece babydoll set and the lace was pretty. It also came in a variety of colors. You thought for a moment if your dates kept going well and anything were to happen you would want to be prepared right.

You looked through the color selection and found a navy blue one and headed for the counter. You paid for them when you realized what time it was. You quickly made your way to the parking lot and headed towards the taco place Jake had sent you the address to. When you pulled in he was already there so you went inside. You looked around spotting him and came to sit down in front of him. “I’m sorry I’m late. I was shopping and lost track of time”, you insisted.

“It’s alright I sat down maybe ten minutes ago so no big deal. What did you go shopping for?”, he asked. “I got some new clothes and some tennis shoes for work. Then I got sidetracked by another store before I realized what time it was”, you explained. “What store got you sidetracked that badly?”, he questioned. You didn’t answer because you couldn’t just say you were in a lingerie store trying to think of a set he would like. 

A laugh drew you out of your head when you realized it was Jake. “Was it a sex store because I could totally see someone getting sidetracked in one of those”, he joked. This was your chance to avoid the question and get back at him. “No it wasn’t, but I bet you would love to see which toys I would pick out for nights I’m alone”, you said, picking up a menu. “Darlin’ you can’t just say something like that to a man”, he responded. 

Now Jake was imagining you back at the apartment, when Rooster wasn’t there, getting yourself off and damn if it wasn’t a beautiful picture in his head. How your body would quiver and how you would whimper and moan. Then he imagined you calling his name when you fell apart. “Jake…Jake. Hello earth to Jake:, you said. He seemed to snap back to reality and looked at you with a questioning look. “He’ll have a sweet tea”, you answered. 

He then realized you had tried to get his attention so the waitress could take your drink orders. “What were you thinking about?”, you teased knowing damn well what he was probably thinking about. “You’re so cruel”, he said dramatically. “No this is cruel”, you stated and drew your boot up his leg under the table. Where had this boldness come from? Sure you were bold back in college, but never like this. It had to be Jake. Just being in his presence did something to you. 

You felt his hand grab your booted ankle and you swore you could see him straighten in his chair. “You okay?”, you hummed. “Yeah, figure out what you want yet?”, he asked. You put your foot back onto the floor and when the waitress came back you both ordered. “I thought we were taking things slow”, Jake stated after the waitress left. “We are but it doesn’t mean I can’t tease you every once in a while”, you replied. 

“You’re somethin’ else”, he sighed. This was something totally different than what he was used to and he was loving every bit of it. Your boldness and the way you would think of something to say to almost anything and everything he threw at you to try and embarrass you. You were cocky in your own way and that’s what drew him to you in the first place. He wanted this to work and hell for the first time in a long time he wanted something steady.

It scared him a little how much he wanted that, but his sister had always said “eventually you’ll find one that matches your own crazy”. You were watching as Jake got lost in his own thoughts again and when he did that he would absentmindedly smile. “Jake how will I get to talk to you when your on missions?”, you ask. “Well you can write me letters if you want. It may take em’ a while to get to me”, he replies. The way he said it made you wonder if anyone had ever sent him letters before. “Do you get a lot of letters when you're on a mission?”, you continue your questioning. 

“Sometimes but they are all from my sister asking how I’m doing”, he responds. “You’re parents don’t write to you”, you said. “No, my mom died before I joined the Navy and dad, well he didn’t like that I chose the Navy over the ranch back home”, he responded. “I’m sorry about your mom. If you don’t mind, would you tell me about her some day. When you’re ready that is”, you whispered. Jake felt like he was in a whirlwind of emotions today. “Yeah I would actually like that”, he replied.

“I can tell you a little bit about her before our food gets here. She was the most amazing woman ever. I mean she just knew when something was going on with her kids ya’ know. She would always tell me I was her favorite. I have three sisters and an older brother and she was always fair about things. She never judged people right away; she tried to get them to open up to her. She would have loved you”, he trailed off. 

“I would have loved to have met her”, you say. “I know my sister would love to tell you all of the embarrassing stories about me if you ever meet her”, he groaned. “I would love to hear all of them, but not all at once so I’ll have something new each time to tease you about”, you say trying to lighten the mood. “I bet you would”, he chuckled. The food arrived before he could tell you more and when you took the first bite of your taco you swore you had never had anything like it before. 

“Holy shit Jake why didn’t you tell me about this place sooner”, you cried. “Well since it’s so good, are we counting this as a second date?”, he joked. “Sure these tacos are better than sex”, you say. “I don’t know about that besides how do you know these tacos are better than sex. What kind of men have you dated?”, he laughed. “Apparently the wrong ones”, you replied. You both enjoyed your meals and talked for another hour before you left. You gave him a quick peck on the lips and turned to go back to your truck, but his hand shot out and grabbed your wrist pulling you back to him.

He kissed you slowly at first then it started to build as if he were a starved man. When he pulled away you were panting trying to catch your breath. “I’ll see you later”, he stated. “Yeah especially if I get more kisses like that”, you laughed breathily. He watched until you made it to your truck and started it before he went to his own truck. You smiled to yourself when you noticed the shopping bag on the floorboard of the truck. 

The next couple of days were uneventful as most of the Dagger Squad were too tired to come to the Hard Deck. You could see that Rooster was exhausted from training when you got home from your shift. “I brought you something to eat, it's on the counter”, you called to him from the kitchen. “Alright I’ll come get it in a minute”, he called out from his room. Then you grabbed the other box of food that you had brought home and made your way next door. You knocked on Jake's door and waited for a few minutes until he answered. “Hey I brought you some food from the Hard Deck. Bradley said you all have been training hard and I want to make sure you all are at least eating dinner”, you say. 

“Thanks you can come in if you want”, he offers. He looks just as exhausted as Bradley and you can tell his shoulders are tight as he keeps rolling them. He eats as you take up your usual spot on his couch. Once he is finished he comes to sit down beside you. “Are you alright? You keep rolling your shoulders”, you comment. “Yeah it’s probably just strained muscles from training so much”, he tells you. 

“Sit on the floor in front of me. Back towards me”, you say, gesturing to said spot. He gives you a raised eyebrow, but does as you say. Before he can say anything else you grab his shoulders and start massaging the tight muscles. He groans as you hit a particularly sore spot, and you focus on it until the tension melts away. Hell the noises that are coming from him make you wet, but you won’t admit it or acknowledge it. 

You continue until he is fully relaxed and all the tension is gone. Now when he looks at you he has a sleepy look in his eyes. “You should get some rest”, you tell him. He agrees and walks with you to the door where you share a couple of kisses. You eventually make it back and find that Bradley had also eaten and gone to bed. You knew they were leaving Monday for their mission and the Dagger Squad all agreed to come visit you on Friday at the Hard Deck. 

During the week you find out from Bradley that Fanboy and Payback got injured and that they were being replaced for the time being with new Top Gun graduates. That unsettled you when you realized that was like a football team losing their star lineman to protect the quarterback. Bradley also told you that Hangman wasn’t happy about him being team leader. When Friday rolled around you decided to change up your look.

You got your jean shorts you had bought along with a cute tank top that showed a modest amount of cleavage and your tennis shoes. You put the lip gloss that Nat had slipped to you and headed to work. It was unusually busy and you felt like you hadn’t stopped since you got there. When the Dagger Squad showed up you were so busy you didn’t even notice. Someone wolf whistled and you turned about to give them a piece of your mind when you noticed it was Nat. 

“Damn (Y/N) wait till Hangman sees this outfit, but seriously you look amazing”, she tells you. “Thanks is he not here yet?”, you questioned. “No he was having a very heated discussion with Mav about how he should be team leader this time”, she explains. That makes you frown as you wonder why he is so upset about it. From what you were told he was in reserve last mission and went against orders to save Mav and Rooster. “Well I will see you all in a minute when I take my break”, you explain. Nat waves you off as you go to the next table to take orders. 

The break never comes and you don’t tell Penny because it just means more tips by the end of the night. Jake had just gotten there and as per usual headed to the pool table with the rest of the Dagger Squad. He looks for you, but doesn’t see you at first glance. When he does spot you he has to do a double take as his eyes rake over your legs and then to your face framed perfectly by your hair. Jake continues to glance your way until your shift ends and you come to join the squad.

“Hey baby”, you say. “Darlin’ I gotta say you look damn good”, he praises. “Thanks” you reply. He thinks he died earlier and this is heaven, but it gets even better when you decide to play a round of pool with Nat against him and Javy. You lean over to take a shot and he swears you do it on purpose. Your ass is perfect in the shorts and he was starting to get hot under the collar. Nothing prepared him though for when you did it again, but gave you a perfect view down your top.

He kept reminding himself he was going to take things slow, but damn it did he want to take you home right now. You realized how distracted he was and used it to your advantage as you and Nat ended up winning. After another couple of hours you were ready to call it a night. “I’ll see you tomorrow for our second date”, you told Jake as you kissed him goodnight. Sleep was calling your name as you walked to your truck. You made it back to the apartment and showered the smell of food off you. 

You were laying in bed when a text rolled in you grabbed it expecting it to be Jake or Bradley, but no it had to be that damn number. ‘FOUND OUT WHERE YOU TOOK OFF TO. I’LL BE SEEING YOU REAL SOON AND THEN YOU'RE COMING BACK HOME WHERE YOU BELONG!”. “Not a chance in hell asshole besides you don’t have the money to make it out here”, you mumbled as you turned over in bed to fall asleep.

Saturday you slept in until noon then you got up to get some laundry done. Once all the mundane chores were done you got ready for your date. Jake had told you to wear your usual jeans, t-shirt, boots and old ball cap. You met him out by his truck as he opened the passenger side door like he always did for you. He hadn’t told you what you all were doing today so you made small talk until you arrived. It was a small airfield and you recognized one of the planes as Mav’s. 

“So what, we just gonna watch Mav do some of that pilot shit”, you say. “Nah I asked him if I could borrow it to show you what flying was like”, he replied. You hesitated for a moment as you had never done anything like this before. He got you a headset and put it on you. “You look so damn hot right now”, he said before stealing a kiss. You climbed up into the seat and he helped strap you in, which was very intimate touching for a minute.

Once he was seated he started the pre-flight check and radioed the tower for the runway and takeoff. You were nervous as the plane made its way down the runway and slowly lifted into the air. “Holy fuck”, you swore. “You okay?”, he asked. “Yeah, just not used to that feeling of taking off”, you explained. “Oh just wait”, he said. You were up for a short while and then Jake really turned it on with barrel rolls and the like. 

At first it terrified you, but then you started to enjoy it as you laughed each time he did it. Then he turned to take you out over the ocean. “It’s so beautiful up here. I wish I could fly with you all the time”, you said. Jake couldn’t speak because he had never been able to share this part of his life with anyone else. He made a mental note to take you flying more often. “I’m glad you like it”, he finally replied. “Usually it goes by a lot faster than this, but that's the difference between this and a jet”, he laughed. 

“I bet it’s such an adrenaline rush”, you say. “Oh for sure if I ever get a chance to take you up in a jet I’m going to”, he promised. You watched the sun set and when the stars popped out it was almost magical. He took you through some of the clouds and it was so beautiful you teared up. Jake heard you sniffle and asked if you were alright and you replied that you were and that you were just a little overwhelmed. 

Eventually he made it back to the runway and set her down. He helped you out of your harness and back down to the ground. When he caught you he slowly lowered you to the ground as you brought his face down to kiss him. “Thank you for sharing a part of your world with me”, you whispered. “Anytime darlin’ anytime”, he sighed. When you both made it back to the truck you realized there was a text from Bradley saying his now girlfriend was over.

“Well Bradley has company tonight”, you grin. “Ya know I’m starting to like this girl because when she comes over I get you all to myself”, he grins. “Alright flyboy lets go”, you smirk. “You are not calling me that”, he says. “Why not I think it’s cute”, you reply. “That’s why” ,he laughed. The rest of the ride was nothing but witty banter. You kissed him up the stairs, against his door and when you both made it to the couch. 

Jake pulled you into his lap as you made out, and it was like someone had poured gasoline over an open flame. You could feel him getting hard beneath you and of course you had to grind down. He gasped as you did it and he could feel your heat radiating through your jeans, but he slowed the roll of your hips and leaned his forehead against yours. “Not yet thought we were taking this slow”, he said. 

“Alright”, you panted. You kissed him again before getting up and getting ready for bed. “I’m gonna hit the bathroom”, you tell him. He nods and heads for his bedroom where he changes into some boxers. “You can do this. You are a confident woman”, you tell yourself. Looking in the mirror at the navy blue two piece lingerie set you are wearing right now. You put one of Jake’s oversized shirts you have claimed for yourself on over it and head into the bedroom. 

He looks up as you walk towards his side of the bed. You straddle him, which he doesn’t mind and kiss him. This time it’s slow and sensual, no rush and when his hands drift up your thighs he expects to find shorts, but he feels lace instead. He breaks the kiss as he stares at you wide eyed. “Are you wearing lace?”, he asks huskily. “Yeah what about it Lieutenant”, you challenge. You notice his pupils dilate when you use his rank. 

“I don’t want to rush you”, Jake whispers. “It’s okay you leave Monday and anything can happen. Just let me take care of you tonight. One blowjob”, you say. How is he supposed to say no when you're kissing his neck and running your fingers through his hair. “Alright”, he pants. With that one little word you sit up and gesture to the shirt you’re wearing. “Want to do the honors Lieutenant Seresin”, you playfully giggle. 

He grabs the hem of the shirt and pulls it over your head and he is met with the navy blue lace. He leans back taking you in. Certain that he crashed the plane earlier and this is his heaven. “Damn you’re gorgeous darlin’ “, he drawls. You smile and lean down to kiss him again slowly making your way down his chest. You lick down his abdomen like you have wanted to do since the first time you saw him shirtless. You can feel him twitch in his boxers as you nip at the v that leads down to your prize. 

You slowly glide your hand over his cock as he groans. You pull him out of his boxers and marvel at the shape and girth. The head is a darker pink and oozing precum as you slide your hand over him. He is watching intently as you work his shaft and when you give a kitten lick to the head he lets out the filthiest moan you think you have ever heard. He is slightly above average in length, but the girth is bigger than any guy you had dated before. 

You take his head into your mouth and suck hard. His hands immediately shoot for your hair. You moan as you slide a little further down testing the waters. Jake swears it’s great, but not enough at the same time. He bucks a little causing you to retreat. “Sorry”, he gasps out. “It’s alright”, you tell him then go back to what you were doing, but starting to build a faster rhythm. You listen to the way he moans and curses with little “that’s it just like that” thrown in. You swear you're soaking the panties you're wearing, but tonights about him. 

“Oh fuck (Y/N) just like that. Oh fuck oh fuck oh fuck”, he whines. You pull away as he curses again as his orgasm starts to slowly slip away. He gives you those puppy eyes and you take him back into your mouth. You start up your rhythm again and his hips are twitching as you pick up the pace a little more. “Oh shit (Y/N). I’m gonna’ cum darlin’ “, he rasps out. You bring your other hand up to massage his balls and that does it.

His hips jerk a couple of times and he is spilling into your mouth with your name spilling out of his lips like a prayer. When he comes back down from his high he watches as you swallow and damn if that doesn’t do something for him. He sits up and pulls you in to kiss you and you know he can taste himself. He groans as you both fight for dominance. He tucks himself back into his boxers as you lay on your back on your side of the bed. 

He rolls over you, caging you in as he begins to kiss you again. He starts to nip down your throat when you realize he isn’t stopping. “This is probably the worst time to ask this, but will you be my girl?”, he says between kisses. “Yes”, you whisper to him. He looks up at you and smiles and if that doesn’t have you melting. He goes back to kissing and nipping at your throat then down and he palms your right breast flicking the nipple through the lace. 

“Jake, you don’t have to do this. I’m fine with leaving it like this tonight”, you reassure. “Darlin’ it’s like you said I leave on Monday and anything could happen. So if you think I’m not going to at least taste your pussy you have another thing comin’ “, he replies. You moan at his words but you still try to dissuade him as he pulls your lacy bra down enough to expose your nipples. He swoops down without warning and sucks one into his mouth and flicks his tongue over it. You gasp as your fingers tangle into his hair and tug. 

He groans then switches nipples as his hand slowly travels down to cup your lace covered pussy. You moan and whisper his name then retract your hands from his hair to grab the sheets when he grazes his finger over your covered clit. He slowly starts kissing his way down your stomach and hooks his fingers in your panties to pull them off. He sits up to take them all the way off then grabs your leg to put it on his shoulder.

He slowly kisses his way down your leg to your inner thigh and you swear you have to be soaking by now. When he lays out on his stomach you feel his breath hit your core and he places your other leg over his other shoulder. You make eye contact with him right as he licks a stripe up your core to your clit. You throw your head back and whimper as he teases your clit some more, but then he closes his lips around it and sucks hard. 

You arch into his mouth as his arms wrap around your legs trying to pull you closer. “Jake!”, you cry and he lets go. “Yes darlin’ “, he taunts. “Please don’t stop” you whine. He laughs a little, but goes back to it and delves into your folds. You swear it can’t get any better, but he lets go of one of your legs to run a finger along your slick folds. He slowly pushed his middle finger in and back out repeating the action a few times before adding his ring finger. 

He groaned when your pussy spasmed around his fingers as he curled them upwards. He started making a come here motion with those two fingers and you started to writhe and whimper even more. “Oh Jake please don’t stop please”, you begged. “Oh darlin’ I don’t intend to”, he chuckles. You look down at him as he goes back to sucking on your clit and you swear you are two seconds away from the best orgasm of your life as you throw your head back again and body drawing tight as a bow string.

His fingers speed up their motion until you can hear the greedy sounds your pussy is making. Jake hasn’t stopped teasing your clit with his tongue, but it isn’t enough as you try chasing your orgasm. “Jake please more pleasepleaseplease”, you babble. He smirks but puts your clit between his lips sucking hard but also flicking it with his tongue. You cry out and arch off the bed as your orgasm rips through you. Jake doesn’t stop as your thighs snap shut around his head as you ride out your high. Eventually trying to pull away from him as you start to become overstimulated.

“Jake no more please”, you plead. He finally relents and you let your legs loosen as he sits up and looks at his fingers that are covered in your slick. You watch as he licks them clean and groans at the taste. Then he is crawling over you again to kiss you. The kisses are the slowest they have ever been as his thumb strokes your ribs. When he pulls away from you he gets up and disappears down the hall into his bathroom, and when he comes back he is holding a washcloth. He cleans you up and then he throws the washcloth in the hamper. 

He automatically grabs the shirt you were wearing previously as you take the bra off. He stares at your naked body admiring it before you slip the shirt over your head. “Come on babe you look like you're about to drop any minute”, you tell him. He was pleasantly tired as you beckoned him to bed. “Just a minute darlin’ I’m gonna clean up”, he tells you. He takes off his boxers and tosses them where he tossed the washcloth, grabbing a new pair and heading for the bathroom. 

When he comes back and lies down you can see the worry etched on his face. “What’s wrong Jake?”, you ask. “I’m worried about the mission and the two new guys assigned to us. What if I don’t make it back to you”, he says. You lean up to kiss him and pull him to you as he puts his arm over your waist and his head on your chest. “You will come back to me”, you say. He hums as you scratch his scalp and within minutes of doing so he is asleep. You smile at him and it isn’t long before you start to fall asleep too.

[stargirlsmooch]

stay

abby anderson x fem!reader

abby wanted what was best for lev, always. so when they come across a house, she sees her opportunity. thank god the owner is a total sweetheart. a little angsty + super fluffy! 2.9kwords.

!timeline wrong, not canon whatsoever, fluff, cuddles, a dog with a stupid name and Lev being funny and cute, a little angsty. divider by @firefly-graphics !

They had spotted the house a few days ago, perched on a little hill and surrounded by dense woodland, perfectly hidden and protected by the natural environment. Lev had wanted to run right up to the front door the second they saw it, his usual fearlessness overpowering any logical thought, reminding Abby about a time she would rather forget… involving heights and bridges.

After a few minutes of bargaining, Abby had convinced Lev that they needed to wait a few days, scope the place out and keep close by. The two set up camp just out of sight and earshot of the house, envy growing every time they peeked at the puffing chimney and the warmth lining the window panes. What Abby wouldn’t do to get inside that house.

It would’ve been a whole lot easier if it was unoccupied, if they could just waltz right in and make themselves at home, take off their boots and hang up their coats. But close observation had pummelled that dream into the ground when they spotted you, bundled up in a brown coat and wool hat, walking a German Sheppard along little desire paths that you had carved into the earth.

You would return to the house with a smile on your face and the sweet dog trailing behind you, reminding Abby of Alice and pulling at her heartstrings. I miss her so much.

The chill of November had started to settle a few nights ago, with days getting shorter and the air getting colder. Lev felt a mild kind of jealousy working its way around him at the sight of you passing in front of the windows with only a t-shirt on, whilst he wrapped himself in every layer he owned. It must be so warm in there. 

When a few suns had set and risen, Abby thought the situation had been assessed enough, thought she had gathered enough information and thought she was ready to march up to that front door and bust it open… and then kindly beg for mercy. 

If Lev wasn’t with her, she probably wouldn’t even have paid the house a second look, she would’ve walked right past and kept on her way to nowhere. But her little companion had begged, literally pulled on her jacket sleeve and dug his heels in, when he spotted the house. 

“We can just… I dunno… walk up and knock on the door.” He whispered, looking down at his fingers, already knowing the reaction he was going to get wasn’t going to be the one that he wanted. 

“You’re kidding, right?”

“She seems nice.” 

“Oh yeah, and you’ve talked to her?” Abby asked with a chuckle, placing her strong hands on her hips and turning around to look at you as you busied yourself in what appeared to be your kitchen.

Lev stayed silent, watching you too with his arms crossed over his chest in quiet defiance, “I can just tell.” 

“You can just tell… right. And what about that massive dog on the porch, huh? What about him?” 

“Hey! You’re the one who told me that dogs are nice.” His face crumpled in annoyance, brow furrowing and lip curling up in minute anger as he pointed a finger at her. He knew Abby was trying to scare him.

“No, I told you Alice was nice.” 

“Look, we overheard her calling it Taco. No dog called Taco can be that bad.” He argued, waving his arms around manically in hopes it would force his point across.

Abby’s face turned fiercely serious, “you know what a taco is, right Lev? It’s not something to joke about. It’s a strain of infected that rips the limbs off people and-”

“Shut up, I know what a taco is. I already told you I’m thirteen, not eight. And don’t you dare say it.”

“You’re the size of an eight-year-old.”

Abby ended up promising to make a move the next time you came outside, just to make it all up to Lev. She didn’t expect the next time you ventured out to be when you were chopping firewood with an axe so big it almost made you topple over. 

But she gathered her composure and climbed the hill slowly, keeping her eye on Taco who sat in his usual spot on the porch steps, panting with his pink tongue hanging out of his mouth. Abby wasn’t going to let his current adorable doe-eyed expression trick her, she knew he could turn at any moment and come bounding at her with red eyes.

Instead, his head lolled to the side at the sight of her and he trotted up to her before flopping onto his back with a cute doggy smile on his face. She bent down and gave him a gentle pat on the head, which was met with a happy whine.

“I was wondering when you were gonna come up here,” you said, turning around and greeting Abby with a pleasant smile. “You took your time. How long were you out there? A week?” 

Her mouth felt like it was wired shut, put in a near-permanent state of shock at your fearlessness (and embarrassment based on the fact that she wasn’t as sneaky as she thought she was). 

“Tell your little friend to come out too.” 

Taco yapped angrily at the loss of Abby’s hand, chasing it with his head. You propped the axe up against a block of wood and made your way towards the house, giving Lev a little wave as he made his way out from behind the treeline from where Abby had come from.

“I’m guessing you guys want showers, and beds, and food. I’ve got everything you need in here.” You smiled as Lev picked up his pace towards you, only for his hood to be grabbed by Abby as they shared some hushed words.

You didn’t need to hear the conversation to know what was being said, you knew your unusual generosity was screaming alarm bells at the pair, but the decision to welcome them into your home (even if they just wanted it for one night) was one that was made quickly and easily. 

The reason: loneliness.

Having spoken to no one but your father, who only came once a week to deliver supplies, it was no wonder you were feeling a little alone. You missed having someone to love on, someone to touch, someone to cuddle. One look at Abby and you decided that she was the only one you would give that to. 

After about thirty seconds, Lev shook Abby off and followed you, rushing up the stairs and through the door, finding you in the kitchen, at the fridge. He gawked at the stocked shelves, and you stood there giggling at him, “help yourself, hun.”

Leaving him to his own devices, you wandered into the living room to find Abby checking the locks on all your windows and pulling the curtains closed. Her powerful frame took up a good chunk of space, filling the room with a sense of security even though there was a feeling far from it painted across her face.

“Hey,” you said quietly, grabbing her attention, “you can leave if you want, or only stay for a few hours, it’s completely up to you.”

Abby couldn’t help but be taken aback by your kindness. She couldn’t remember the last time anyone other than Lev had smiled at her, and here you were opening up your home to her. But she nodded her head as you spoke, trying to show a little appreciation before she started her interrogation.

“What’s in it for you?”

Pursing your lips, you thought it over. The answer was easy enough to come up with, it had spawned in your mind the moment you even thought about the prospect of having someone, other than Taco, to talk to.

“Company?” 

“Okay… and that’s it? You don’t want anything in return?”

“I guess it depends on how long you’re planning on staying.” You answered as Abby took a seat on your battered couch, shrugging her jacket off and relishing the heated air. You followed her lead and took yours off too, laying it over the arm of the chair and sitting down next to her, slowly. “Firewood doesn’t chop itself.”

Abby laughed at that, just a quiet one under her breath that made a grin break out across your face. Maybe you were getting a little ahead of yourself, and maybe it was a little too ambitious… but you really hoped she would stay.

“So, Lev, here you go,” you said. “Here are three blankets just in case you get a little cold, and a pillow, and just letting you know that Taco might crush your feet if you don’t move them because that’s his favourite place to sleep.” 

You looked down at him sprawled out on your couch, his head now propped up on cotton and feathers, making a content sigh burst out of him, “thank you so much.”

“No problem, hun. You get some rest and I’ll make you pancakes in the mornin’, okay?”

“What are pancakes?” 

You giggled, “I guess you’ll see.”

The walk from Lev to your bedroom was short, directly down the hall and behind a chipped door. Your bed was pushed right up in the corner of the room, with a solid white comforter pulled over a soft mattress, topped with cushions and more blankets you had found.

The sounds of water hitting the floor drifted under your bathroom door, along with the steam, as you sat down and waited for Abby to finish showering. You had already laid out some clean underwear and an longsleeve men’s shirt you had found at the bottom of one of your drawers, thinking that it would suit her (and fit her) better than anything you owned.

The two of you had chatted deeply over dinner, her sharing details of the explorations with Lev, how they met, her time at WLF, her friends… more than you thought you deserved to know, but there was something about the compassion in your eyes that made Abby pour her heart out. She felt safer than she ever had when she looked at you, safe in a way no one had ever made her feel. And it was overwhelming.

She used her time in the shower to release the tension, letting the scalding water work over her tired muscles. The tears managed to keep themselves at bay as she stepped out, whimpering at the softness of your bathmat and the warmth of the towel you had left out for her. She dried off and wrapped it around herself, padding over to the door and cracking it open, seeing your face move to her as you jumped up off the corner of the bed.

“Hey…” you started, feeling Abby’s reserved nature, the one she had had when you met earlier, pop back up between you, “I have some pjs here for you… it’s just a shirt and underwear but it’s better than nothing. I can see if I can find some bottoms for you if you’d like, but I-”

“No, no. That’s more than enough, thank you.” 

You nodded, smiling so tenderly at her that she had to avert her gaze to the ground. She was terrified of crying, letting the tears fall and the strength fall with them. Too much attention spent on hiding her emotions, she didn’t notice you in front of her until your hands were on her bare shoulders.

“You’re okay now, Abby. Both of you are safe here.” You whispered, feeling her muscles bunch up underneath your fingers and her shoulders slowly start to shake with tears, “oh, honey.”

You didn’t think twice before wrapping your arms around her the best you could, squeezing her to you fiercely, trying to ground her to you. She had a few inches on you, so you cuddled her around her upper-waist, palms flat in the centre of her back. You considered pulling away when you felt no response from her, scared you had pushed it a little too far, but her own arms wound their way around your shoulders, their weight tying you to her. 

“Thank you.” 

Kissing the side of her neck, your pulled back and took her face in your hands, “it’s my pleasure, baby. And I know we agreed that you would sleep on the floor but, how do you feel about sharing with me? Yeah? I just wanna cuddle.”

Her lips were pouted adorably as she nodded at you, placing her hands on top of yours and winding your fingers together, pulling your right hand to her lips and giving your knuckles a sweet kiss.

Once she had released you, you turned towards your window, letting her get dressed in subtle privacy as you checked and double checked the lock before pulling the blind down, the only light now being your bedside lamp. You then shuffled out of your pyjama pants before laying them over the chair in the corner of the room, only turning around when you heard the quiet rustle of sheets and the familiar creek of your bedframe.

Abby took a deep breath at the sight of you, awaiting the feeling of your skin again, imagining what your thighs would feel like pressed into the back of hers as you spooned her. She pulled the duvet up to her chin, willing the cold cotton to warm up as you climbed up to your side, slinking under the blanket as to not pull any from Abby.

When you reached over her to shut off the light, you paused, staring down at her in barely-contained awe, entranced by her beauty, “you’re gonna stay, right?” 

“I’m staying. We’re staying.” She whispered finitely, watching your eyes dance across her face, drinking her in before you dropped a warm kiss on the corner of her mouth. You smiled and let the room fall into darkness.

Instead of fleeing back over to your side of the bed like Abby thought you might do, you wrapped a leg around her waist, your thigh pressing over her hips and warming her tummy. An arm wrapped around you almost naturally, pulling you closer as you laid a palm on her chest, along with your head. 

Abby fell asleep faster than she ever had.

[pocketsizedq]

You're going to be a good dad!

Request:Dad Turcs where he isn’t a dad yet but his wife is pregnant. I don’t have anything else specific in mind.

Word Count:853

Alex had just gotten home from practice to find you laying on the couch which was now a more of a daily occurrence to find you as that was the only place you could get comfortable now being in your third trimester with your guys first kid which you both found out at a recent appointment that it was going to be a little girl. He was stoked about it.

He carefully closed the door making sure not to wake you up as he knew you had a hard time finding rest so far into your pregnancy. Alex started to remove his shoes, putting them on the rack by the door while doing so, laying his keys in the dish by the door before making his way over to your sleeping figure. The boy slowly squatted down to become face to face with your sleeping one slowly reaching his left hand up to gently rub his thumb over your cheek bone with a soft smile on his face.

He slowly brought his hand down to rub your exposed swollen stomach. Alex could feel his smile wide even bigger when he felt his little girl kick his hand but he did have a small worry that it would wake you up so he looked back up at you to notice you were still fast asleep so he places a gentle kiss on your forehead still with beaming.

Alex continued to rub your bump gently watching you sleep just admiring his beautiful wife and the mother of his child. He would every now and then place kisses on your nose which slowly woke you up from your slumber. You slowly start to stretch which scares alex little which makes him stand up and remove his hand from your bump.

“Oh Princess, Did I wake you? I didn’t mean to if I did.” He spoke softly to you trying not to scare you while gently running his fingers through your hair watching you rub the sleep out of your eyes trying to get your eyes to adjust to the light.

You slowly shake your head letting out a yawn saying “when did you get home?.” He helps you sit up brushing your hair out of your eyes, squatting down resting his hands on either side of your knees.

“Not too long ago baby. Have you eaten yet?.” still having the soft tone he was speaking with before to which you shake your head yes but then spoke up “you know i can always eat again. This little girl keeps me hungry.” He lets out a soft chuckle at your response kissing your head before pulling out his phone.

“What do my girls want to eat?” He spoke, pulling up doordash on his phone, moving his glazes from his phone to looking at you, putting his other hand that was not holding his phone on your bump gently rubbing your stomach.

“Hm..” you think for a moment before saying “Tacos.” which was honestly funny as that has been your main craving throughout your whole pregnancy to the point that Alex has made you Taco at three in the morning just to make you and the baby happy which he would do anything to keep you both happy.

“I should have known it would be tacos.” He softly chuckles before saying “same place baby?” to which you answer with a nod as you now have a go to taco place since finding out you were pregnant which was a family owned business that made amazing brisket tacos.

Alex puts in the order in on doordash after doing so setting his phone down turning his attention to you saying “it has been ordered. Now baby, what do you want to do?” You carefully stand up to which he quickly takes your hand into his hand helping you stand up putting his other hand on your bump.

“Let’s watch a movie in bed and cuddle?” you questioned him looking up at him to which he spoke “sounds like a plan babygirl.” Alex helped you to the bedroom noticing that your clothes that you had on were actually his.

You had on one of his plain black tee shirts with a pair of his gray sweats to which he found you absolutely adorable in them. He helps you lay down in the bed before handing you the remote making his way to the closet to get into something more comfortable.

After Alex got changed into something more comfortable he made his way back to the bed getting into the bed on his side and noticed you had put on a random romcom which made him chuckle but he doesn't say anything about it.

He made sure you had everything you needed before he got into bed so Alex pulled you into his arms holding you close to him kissing your head gently rubbing your bump with a smile on his face so happy you were the one carrying his baby. He just held you close whispering sweet nothings into your ear while you guys wait for your tacos to arrive.