#funny because she’s a shrimp
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Do NOT tell me this the girl Abyss Monarch Cookie is trying to rizz up😭
The crybaby arrived
I might change her design a bit in the future for reasons but this is just a visual mostly because I have to add radio like features and other stuff I forgor to add
She can’t talk but she can speak through the radio so that’s fun, a very sewerslider girl ^^
#cookie run#cookie run oc#📡₊˚ෆ ⋆ 03_OC#📁₊˚ෆ ⋆ 01_ART#Weeping Phantom Cookie visual lol#not final design but a visual like I said a 1000 times#my favorite sewerslider ghost#she causes people to go crazy#she yells KRILL YOURSELF /j#funny because she’s a shrimp#a ghost shrimp I guess in this case lol#a spider shrimp as well- ghost spider shrimp
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Penelope: odysseus darling....I'm not judging but why are you strapping knives, money, and an emergency pack to your chest? Is something happening? Should I grab one too??
Odysseus, not explaining anything: I'm not taking any fucking chances I've learned my lesson the last time she caught me off gaurd I was 17 it's not fucking happening now when we're married. I know better
Penelope who speaks odysseus: ....lady Athena attacks you in middle of the night?
Odysseus: YES it's so rude of her
Penelope, internally: don't laugh don't laugh don't laugh: should have just been a weaver instead, then lady Athena would just show up demanding woven battle scenes and new capes.
Odysseus: incoherent screaming
Later that night
Athena: Hey hey penelope I'll give you the power to see colors you can't even imagine and the threads to go with it if you get rid of that survival bag.
Penelope, not even hesitating: deal
#Epic the musical#The odysseus#Pre-canon#Penelope#Odysseus#Athena#All of athenas chosen are rat bastards and therefore Athena is too#Odysseus and athenas wacky “training” adventures#Odysseus amd Athena locked in a stalemate not being able to surprise the other anymore#Enter penelope also a rat bastard and 100% willing to help the other out because she finds it funny#Yes Athena did give penelope the ability to see shrimp colors for betraying odysseus to her#Yes penelope found odysseus shrieking funny#Yes she did then help odysseus prank athenas temples (she left a very nice tapestry as an apology)
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Since you suggested asks for the demon Castys AU...
I'd love to see if Neteri would let him outside like she did with Erebus, and how he would act during the outing, and find out what his reasons might be for not stubbornly fighting her at every turn. Or maybe he does take the chance and run for it? I'm mostly just curious how that scenario would play out.
Sorry this took so long but it's 3.5k words of these two being goobers so I hope that makes up for the wait!
←Previous - Castys & Terror AU Masterlist - Castys Masterlist
Ingredients: some dehumanization associated with slavery, threatened vivisection, noncon touching (unsexy), mentioned noncon surgery, mentioned aphobia
"I thought this was supposed to be, like, a good day for me."
"It is!"
"Put the fucking leash away, then."
"Maybe if you actually behaved for me, I'd consider it, but you're not exactly the most trustworthy, Castys."
Castys rolled his eyes, grumbling. Neteri was the one who'd fucked up his crazy arm surgery and let that creepy bitch H-something come in and nearly strip him naked, but, sure, he was the one being ridiculous. "I guess, but I never even said I wanted to leave the palace. I just wanted delicious street food. You're the one who's deciding to take me outside."
Neteri sighed. "Have you ever even had street food?"
"…No. I just, uh…" Castys scratched the back of his head. "It…it always smelled good from the window of the castle. But my parents wouldn't let me go and try it. Said it was 'unbefitting of my station'." He snorted. "Like I'd ever been up to their standards anyway."
Neteri gave him a sympathetic smile. "I figured it was something like that. Well, what you don't know is that it's best to eat street food when it's fresh. It wouldn't be as good if I just brought it back to you. Plus, I think part of the experience is eating it on the street! Well, not in the street, you don't want to get hit by carts-"
"That much was obvious, thanks." Castys weighed his options. Stay here and think of something else he wanted, or agree to humiliation and eat delicious hot food on sticks? Sure, his magic tongue made everything taste good, but what he wanted was variation, something he'd never tasted before. Those mysterious smells that always wafted up to his window. Fuck, he was already salivating a bit. It didn't help that he hadn't eaten much last night in anticipation of today. "Fine. We can go."
"Great! You won't regret it, I promise!" She said that like Castys wasn't already regretting it a bit, feeling the weight of the chain as she attached it to his new metal collar. The weird red arm she'd given him turned the same shade of brown as the rest of him pretty soon after he got it, but after a few days he'd managed to make it turn red again and grow claws when he wanted it to, and the first thing he did was use the claws to rip his stupid collar off. Neteri didn't exactly appreciate that, and, after spending the night with his wrists chained behind his back, he was gifted a thick metal collar in the morning, which was just…lovely.
Maybe she was right about him not being trustworthy.
"So, what, we're gonna walk around and I'm gonna be your little slave boy?" Castys asked as they made their way through the palace's hallways.
Neteri shrugged. "Something like that. People aren't really going to pay you any mind. Slaves are common enough here."
"Do other people take their slaves for walks like dogs?"
"No, because other people aren't as nice as me," Neteri said proudly.
"Right, of course. I'm very grateful that you cut my arm off and then did a shit job of putting a new one on."
"Okay," Neteri sighed, "I get it. How about I turn the leash invisible, is that enough for you?"
Castys didn't give much of a shit about what random city people thought, mainly just bothered by the pull of the thing on his neck, but…"If you do are you still gonna drag me around by it? It'd look pretty fucking stupid."
"I guess not, so…here." She grabbed his right hand, the links of chain sort of balled up between their palms. "That's not too much touching for you, is it?"
"I can live with it." It was a hell of a lot better than the alternative, and he didn't mind his hands being touched, really. He had to shake a lot of hands with a lot of random people back in his old life, so he was used it. Neteri did her invisible-leash magic, and they continued on their way.
Outside was bright, which was not surprising, but he still had to blink a few times. Fuck, he…he forgot how nice the sun felt. He hadn't even considered the actual outside part of being outside, and it was pretty nice. The sun, the birds, the salty sea breeze, the little lady tugging him along to somewhere…
"So where exactly are we going?" he asked, glancing down streets as they passed them by.
"The seaside market. They have the best food stalls in the city. I don't really have a particalur one in mind, though, so if you see something you want just let me know."
"Sounds good." Castys's stomach grumbled, and he found himself feeling a bit excited. He was going to get good food and get to look at the ocean, which he'd always had a fascination with. He made trips to the seaside when he could back home, but there was always a part of him that longed to hop on a boat and sail away. He…he could do that today, if he played his cards right. Get away from Neteri somehow and stow away until he got discovered and then be forced to work so he didn't get thrown overboard-
Wait, why did his escape daydream end in him basically being a slave again? Could he really not imagine just being free? He tried, but he realized he had no idea what he would do. Freedom to do what he wanted was sort of a foreign concept, now that he thought about it. Most of his life had been dictated by his parents, his future set in stone, never allowed room to even dream of another destiny. But then that other destiny came and it was a brand on his chest and a metal collar around his neck and he still didn't have control over a single fucking thing.
And you would think the idea of finally having control would be attractive but it wasn't it was overwhelming and nauseating and he was a little relieved when the ship's captain caught him and told him to scrub the deck because at least he knew what he needed to do he didn't have to sit there and try to come up with something he'd never had to before he probably wasn't even good at it he wasn't built for it he was just supposed to be-
"-ou alright? Castys?" Neteri was looking up at him, concern in her eyes. She'd pulled them into a quiet side street without him realizing it.
His mouth was dry, and he wondered if he'd been breathing quickly. He swallowed. "Um, yeah, I think I just…got overwhelmed for a second." He plastered a smile on his face. "I'm fine now."
Neteri frowned slightly. "If you say so. Just let me know if this is too much and you want to go back, okay?"
Castys huffed and rolled his eyes. "Trust me, I'm not gonna want to go back."
"I suppose you won't. But, just so you know," she took a step closer, and then another, backing him against a wall as her arm rose up to pin down his neck, "if you try to run, there will be consequences." All the kindness was gone from her voice, her words as cold as her gaze. "No one will help you, and, if they do, they will be breaking the law. You are legally my property, no matter if you believe it or not. And when you are caught, which you will be," her other hand slid under his shirt, pressing against his stomach, and Castys couldn't help but tense up, "I will cut you open and take a good, long look at all of your organs." Her fingers slid upwards, the lightness of her touch making his skin crawl. "Is that clear?" Her hand stopped above his heart, which was pounding a lot faster than he'd like it to.
His eyes darted around, searching for someone, anyone who was watching, who saw him being fucking threatened in broad daylight. But no one gave a shit. That stupid fucking collar was all they needed to see, and suddenly this was okay. He was less than human, after all. Left with no other choice, Castys looked Neteri in the eye and nodded. "Y-yes. Yes, ma'am."
Neteri's demeanor changed completely, and she stepped back, beaming. "Good boy!" She took his hand once more, pulling him along like none of that had just happened. "We're almost there! I'm sure you're hungry."
Castys's appetite had disappeared, but smelling things would probably bring it back, so he nodded. "I'm known for my huge stomach, so you better be ready." This was supposed to be his day, so Neteri better be ready to get him whatever he damn pleased.
Just as soon as he shook off the feeling of her hand under his shirt.
Finally, the buildings gave way to the vast expanse of the ocean, the docks stretching out into the blue crowded with sailors and workers, crates of cargo and coils of rope, the stalls lining the edge of the street busy with vendors advertising their food to hungry passerby. All it took was for Castys to lay eyes on a beautiful, glistening skewer of beef for his appetite to come roaring back. He pointed at it, excited for the first time in ages.
"I've found our first target."
They wove through the crowd, waiting in line after line as Castys saw another thing he'd like to try, only stopping once they couldn't carry any more. They settled down on a ledge by the docks, and Castys took a moment to go over their haul.
His first love, the beef skewer, which he'd had a few bites of in line for other food. The meat had melted in his mouth, juicy and spicy and just pure bliss. Then, there were fried shrimp with a curry sauce all wrapped up in a flaky flatbread, a bowl of noodles stir-fried with pork and vegetables, sticks of crispy potato with a garlic sauce, and a thick mango and yogurt drink.
Every bite was better than the last, and Castys couldn't help but kick his legs back and forth a little bit as he chewed. Neteri watched him with a warm smile, clearly enjoying her food as well. Castys's eyes wandered as he ate, and he ended up watching a strong sailor lady unloading some cargo. She made moving those heavy boxes look effortless, unless they were empty and it was actually effortless. Either way, she had a cool headband and some awesome fire ink designs of sea monsters on her arms. He'd be happy to serve under her in his new sailor escape fantasies.
"You have good taste in women." Neteri was following his gaze with a dreamy sort of smile. What did she mean by…oh, that kind of taste. That kind of tracked for her, now that he thought about it. But as for him…
"Huh? Oh, I just thought she looked cool. I…I don't really have a taste in women."
Neteri cocked her head slightly, smiling openly. "Taste in men, then?"
Castys swallowed. She probably wouldn't care, right? It's not like it mattered for her experiment. "No, I just…don't." He stared at his feet, not wanting to see her reaction.
"Well, nothing wrong with that." Neteri said casually, taking another bite. Castys blinked, slowly turning to look at her, mouth falling open slightly. Nothing…wrong? Neteri noticed him staring and gave him a concerned look. "You okay, Castys?"
"I…" he leaned back, looking at the sky. "No one's ever said that to me before. My parents…it was the one thing that upset them that I wasn't doing on purpose." Their words echoed in his head, the yells that he was broken and faking it and not a real man hurting far more than any insults directed at him for bad behavior. "Are you sure there's not something wrong with me?" he asked quietly.
Neteri huffed, shaking her head. "Of course not. That's just how you are, and you're not the only one who's like that. You don't have to like people or get married or anything if you don't want to. It's perfectly normal."
Normal. He wasn't sure if he even knew what normal was, between his royal upbringing and his demon body parts. Still, while Neteri's opinion of things wasn't always the most trustworthy, maybe…maybe she was right about this. He'd rather believe her over his parents, anyway.
"Have you…have you ever actually met anyone like me? I just always sort of figured I was the only one." It sounded silly now that he said it out loud, but it's not like the topic ever came up when he met people.
"I have! My little brother doesn't really experience attraction, either. He just wants to live with his best friend forever. There are a few people I met in medical school who feel that way, too. So you're really not alone, okay?"
Castys couldn't help but smile, warm relief replacing the tension in his muscles. "Thanks." He didn't want to get too sappy, so he shoved noodles in his mouth. Thinking more about that could happen later when he was in bed and also by himself.
Neteri was impressed when he finished all of his food, and the look on her face when he said he still had room for dessert was priceless. Even so, she insisted he needed a little time to digest, giving the excuse that there were better sweets stands to be found along the cliff face at the back of the city.
So off they went, wandering through the maze of streets, stopping to look at whatever weird things she thought were significant, which included a dusty-ass bookstore, an old poster that she thought was hilarious for some reason, and, the coolest thing, a bunch of different rocks from around the world. If dealing with foreign representatives had involved more cool rocks, Castys might have actually paid attention to the discussions he'd sat in on growing up. Alas, it was all trade agreements.
Finally, they reached the market along the cliff face, and the bustle here was even more overwhelming than the docks had been. There were all sorts of crafts and magic tools and baskets of spices and, best of all, sugary fried stuff.
Castys examined his options carefully, in the end deciding to go with sweet little fried dough balls that came with a creamy vanilla dipping sauce. They were amazing, but his hands and face got all sticky, and Neteri laughed at him for getting custard on his nose. He got his revenge the moment she grabbed his hand again, rubbing his sticky fingers all over the back of her hand.
"You have got to be the grossest prince I've ever met," Neteri mumbled as she used her water magic to clean them both off.
"I try my best." Castys grinned, taking the insult as a compliment. His eyes wandered as she cleaned in between his fingers, a particularly colorful stall catching his eye. If that's what he thought is was…he could at least ask, right? "So, you know, I've been a very good boy, I think."
Raising an eyebrow, she looked up at him. "For the most part."
"Right. So, like, I'm full, and I'm very grateful for all of the food, but if there was, um, something I could get to have later…?" He flashed his most innocent smile.
Neteri relaxed slightly. "Such as? I don't know what's going to keep well, except for…" she looked around, stopping and smiling when she realized what he was talking about. "Sure, I'll get you some candy."
"Epic." Castys eagarly pulled her over to the candy stall, already weighing his options, wondering how many pieces he could get, and what he even wanted.
"You can get five," Neteri sighed, almost sounding like a tired mother. Five was enough for Castys, and, despite his initial idea of getting a wide variety, he settled on five different flavors of candy sticks. They were decently sized, but not so big he couldn't fit the whole thing in his mouth, which was important. You had to be able to have a hands-free enjoyment experience, but be able to take a break and talk or something using the stick to take it out. Castys usually kept the stick in his mouth long after the candy was gone so he could feel like one of those cool guys who sucked on grass without actually having to have grass sticking out of his mouth.
"I get the other flavors, but you're really getting one with a cricket in it?" Neteri asked as they walked away from the stand, putting his candy sticks in her bag.
"I've never eaten a cricket. I want to see what it's like to be a lizard."
Neteri giggled, giving him a slightly confused look. "I guess it's too bad I'm not turning you into a lizard then, huh?"
"If you were I would accept my destiny more readily." Which was true, he would enjoy laying on a warm rock in the sun for extended periods. He looked over at the stripey cliff face, wondering how many lizards were skittering around on there. For the first time, he noticed all the people gathered around the base of it, laying their hands on the dark crystals randomly embedded in the surface. "What's up with that?" he asked, pointing.
"Oh, that's where people send their energy and prayers up to the Midnight Sun." Upon seeing Castys's blank expression, Neteri continued. "That big symbol in the cliff. It lights up at night thanks to people's energy. It's believed that prayers said while touching one of the stones are sent up to the sun. Do you want to try it?"
Castys had never been the spiritual type, but he was curious about the wall itself, so he could think some thoughts to the ball in sky while he was at it. "Sure, I guess."
The cliff was sandstone, upon closer inspection, which wasn't shocking, but the crystals in the surface…he wasn't sure what exactly they were. Definitely added by people, at the very least, and probably fire element minerals since they made shit glow. Which was why he was here.
Castys put his hand on one of the crystals, thinking. This was basically like making a wish, right? He was apparently too much of a little bitch to run, so wishing for freedom was stupid. Maybe he should wish for some fucking direction on…on anything. Or he could wish to be a lizard who just got to scuttle around and eat bugs and not be expected to do anything. Or he could wish for a million more candy sticks. Or he could wish for something that was remotely realistic, just in case it might come true.
Dear the sun, please make it so I don't have to wear this stupid collar for the rest of my life. It's uncomfortable. Also I want to go on a boat at least once. Sincirely, Castys.
Good enough. He stepped back, a tiny bit woozy from leaving his hand on the crystal for too long. Neteri had already finished, so with that done, they headed…back towards the palace. It was getting sort of late, and he'd known they wouldn't stay out all day, but…
"Did you have a good day, Castys? Have enough good food?" Neteri gave his hand a squeeze.
"Yeah. I'm very full and in a little bit of pain but it was worth it." Manners might be a good idea since Neteri cut him open all the time. "Thanks for the food and stuff."
"Of course! I hope this makes it up to you after that whole mess with your arm."
"Nah, that'll take at least a hundred more candy sticks."
Neteri laughed. "I'll keep that in mind. Now I know where to buy them."
"I expect regular deliveries. No excuses." Maybe he'd be a better test subject if he got little treats more often. He could certainly be persuaded.
"Understood. I won't let you down." Neteri opened the door to the palace, gesturing for him to go first.
After taking one last glance at the city behind him, Castys turned and walked inside, the collar around his neck shifting as he let out a breath he didn't know he was holding.
The day outside was over, and his chance to escape was gone.
He wished he was a little more upset by that, but as Neteri led him back to his cell, all he felt was relief.
AU taglist: @vampiresprite @whump-in-the-closet
Castys Cult: @as-a-matter-of-whump @blackrosesandwhump @fanmanga1357-blog @thehopelessopus @just-a-whumping-racoon-with-wifi
@hearse-song @muddy-swamp-bitch @whumpasaurus101 @yet-another-heathen @galaxywhump
@starnight-whump @his-unspoken-words @misspelledwitch @suspicious-whumping-egg @pumpkin-spice-whump
@painsandconfusion @i-can-even-burn-salad @befuddled-calico-whump @whumpinggrounds @whump-queen
@whumpedydump
#i wrote something#castys & terror au#castys#neteri#dehumanization#noncon touching#castys would lose his mind at the state fair 100%#man now i want a lemon shake up that shit slap#yeah he did it he ripped off the leather collar and has a metal one now#he's very grumpy about it but i dont know what the fuck he expected#neteri thinks she is soooooo nice which like i guess you arent cruel and terrible#but you are keeping that man locked in a room and forever altering his body#like girl. think about this.#hehe castys doesnt run because he's never actually been in control of himself before#he needs someone to tell him what to do and where to go or he starts fucking panicking#anD THEN NETERI SEES HIM PANICKING. AND AFTER HE CALMS DOWN SHE THREATENS HIM LIKE ?????#tbh i just didnt know where else to put the threat because it did need to happen#but it's kind of funny she just does that after he was freaking out a bit like kick him while he's down i guess#hngnggn beef stick...kind of based on filipino bbq pork i had once and kind of based on brazilian steak skewer another time#i dont like shrimp but castys does and i wanted something to be in the flatbread they have a lot of flatbread utensil in taiyorum#stir fry is based on the stir fry place that always has a stupid long line at gencon it's so funny#french fries are the ones i got in auckland the had garlic aioli and i still think about them sometimes#and then mango lassi because Yeah. Yeah i love her#castys doesnt think the poster is funny f in chat#he get his lollipops now!! he is a very good boy if he gets lollipops
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After playing TTR for some time and getting used to the odd feel of a lot of aspects of this server I think it's actually quite fun, so I'll definitely be playing more of it
#I'm looking most forward to the Sellbot Task Force thingy so I can finally see that one boiler#It intruiges me#toontown rewritten#ttr#toontown#toonblr#I think my favourite aspect about this server is the gardening and that you can have a doodle#I hope TTCC will be able to successfully bring doodles back someday because they're neat#I have a doodle named Peachy but I realized she looks like a shrimp so I'm gonna rename her to that when I have enough jellybeans#Oh by the way this won't mean that I'll stop playing or talking about TTCC#My toony heart belongs to the funny manager cogs
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my life is such that every once in a while my mother says something confusing in a conversation and i make the dumbest mistake of asking further questions (like a total moron who likes to know what their conversation partner actually means) and with each question she looks and speaks with more contempt for my subpar intellect and deliberate obtuseness and eventually i feel like the next question will result in truly lethal amounts of contempt so i go "ah... ah okay okay then!" and walk away and as i do i hear her muttering with disgust. and this is normal
#shrimp thoughts#one day i'm going to kill myself and it's going to be funny as fuck#i guess she reacts like this because when i furrow my eyebrows in confusion i look really like idk. upset or aggressive but you'd think#maybe you'd figure something out when its your kid you've known for over 2 decades but like. i don't know man#it's free season for everyone to interpret everything i do as badly as possible while the second i feel hurt by someone's actions everyone#rushes in to assure me they didn't mean ANY harm and i should chillax so again as previously stated idk.
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I might post some of my art from my visual art major work here, This is a smaller piece I did (first one I did at the start of the project ~late 2022, second was late 2023). It was about two hot topic mascot knockoffs that got fired from their jobs for not selling marketable plushies fast enough
#my art#art#ocs#yes ik the rabbit looks like skelaminals she is meant to be a ripoff i pwomise#Its crazy how different they look just from 1 year#the difference in design in really funny too. the rabbit got forehead implants#i might post more of them if this gets more than 1 note#the koala is named Euka and the rabbit is Femur#euka hates everyone except femur and is unemployed. femur is a comic artist that works at an amazon warehouse#euka thinks work is stupid because theyre a koala (a sentient purple one made in a lab) and refuses to use money#artists on tumblr#drawing#shrimp originals#sorry chat i gotta get the algo
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throughout the series of drake and josh it pretty consistently implies that josh nichols is a christian (josh peck is jewish) and in the finale of the series helen (played by yvette nicole brown, not jewish[?]) is portrayed as a practicing jew
#i dont have a problem w either of those things necessarily i just find it interesting#if i had to guess. drake and josh was a mainstream that didnt wanna touch on religion generally#but josh was kind of a dork and usually when josh's religious beliefs are implied it is in dorkish ways#such as praying and thanking the lord after he has his first kiss.#but since dan schneider is jewish perhaps he wanted to make helen have a jewish wedding in the finale?#not that there needs to be a reason. but u do notice occasional jewish-related jokes in d&j but none of them are what you could call#offensive. in good faith that is. 'eric is a pacifist' 'i thought he was jewish?' like come on#text post#i have been rewatching drake and josh recently and i have had so many thoughts#im almost done. i just have left that stupid dance episode that they premiered last for the stupid reason#of a special dance-themed premiere night in fall 2007. they premiered the third episode of icarly and a new zoey 101 on the same night#which i think is so stupid. they should've aired really big shrimp last. it messed w my understanding of the series at the time lol#i remember not really knowing that the show was ENDING. like i knew icarly was starting & miranda was doing that#i thought really big shrimp was like just another special like go hollywood.#and then like two days later they premiered the helicopter episode for some reason#and i was like why is drake not famous in this. he just had a number 1 song in a superbowl commercial#and then a month later the dance one. which. if anything is satisfying about that as a final episode it's just that#that unnamed girl from the blues brothers episode who is obsessed w drake shows up again and congratulates them#and the very final line of the series is 'who is she?' because. because really who IS she?#that's a funny enough throwback to wrap things up with i suppose#drake and josh wasn't a highly serialized show so i can see how they could air those after the intended finale and act like it didn't matte#but i have to tell you it did fuck with my brain a bit at the time. lol. i still think of those episodes as having 'happened' after#and on paramount plus those episodes are still placed after really big shrimp. the injustice#but thats kinda messy. what a weird way to end such an influential and popular sitcom#season 4 had a few lowpoints while still also having some VERY solid episodes.#idk. ill have to continue my series review another time im getting way too longwinded here#helen dubois is jewish
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Being involved in anything V2 related makes the "hey girl i mean they" meme hover behind me like a malevolent spirit.
#hi i love complaining all im doing under this tag is complaining if you dont want to read me whine about something dumb stop reading#she/her v2 genuinely drives me up the fucking wall and ive considered leaving fandom spaces because of it many a time#ive also considered wiping women from existence (using one of the trans add ons that replaces pronouns) over it#“robot yuri/yaoi” is also really irritating#not everything has to be yuri/yaoi. i know its supposed to be a silly haha joke but the markets oversaturated and it lost its funny months#ago.#anyway shrimps 5 alotted tags of meanie time are up#i think im gonna refill shit v2 daily's queue and disappear for another week to see if i can chill out (i will not and i know i will not)
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Wasn’t Me
Pairing: Peter Parker x Stark!reader
Synopsis: when Vision accidentally phases through your wall and catches you and Peter in the act, you try to stop it from spreading to everyone in the tower before Tony gets home
Masterlist
“Wait, this isn’t the kitchen.” Vision said as he accidentally phased through the bedroom wall. You and Peter froze at the sound of a third voice and slowly looked up. Every time you snuck off to have some private time with each other, you made sure to lock the door. But despite all your best efforts to keep your relationship a secret, neither of you accounted for Vision coming through the wall. Especially not when you were right in the middle of….something.
“Oh. Hello.” Vision said and gave you and Peter a polite wave. The act he had caught you did not seem to phase him at all while you and Peter were horrified.
“AHHHH.” You and Peter screamed at the same time. You rolled off of Peter and landed right on the floor while Peter grabbed a pillow and placed it over his lap.
“Forgive me for intruding, but I am looking for the kitchen.” She said to meet her in the kitchen.” Vision asked politely.
“Well you’re not gonna find it here!” You exclaimed as you threw your shirt back on.
“Dude! Get out! ” Peter shouted as he hastily tried to zip his pants.
“Oh, sorry, am I interrupting something?” Vision genuinely asked.
“YES!” You screamed like it was obvious.
“My apologies. I bid you both a good day.” Vision nodded curtly and disappeared back the way he came. You and Peter stayed in silence for a while as you processed what had happened.
“Do you think he saw us?” Peter asked to break the silence. You sat up from under him and gave him a look.
“Do I think he saw us?” You repeated slowly.
“Well do you?” Peter asked as you climbed back onto the bed.
“Are you kidding me? Of course he saw! The straw was already in the coconut. There’s no way he didn’t realize what was going on.”
“Maybe he thought we were just wrestling?” Peter shrugged weakly.
“Uh huh. Wresting with your dick out. Just like WWE.” You said sarcastically.
“Damn it. He definitely saw us. Do you think he’ll tell anyone?” Peter worried.
“He better not. My dad will kill you. And then vaporize your corpse. And then set the ashes on fire. And then blow them into a shrimp cocktail.”
“But I’m allergic to shellfish.”
“Exactly.” You whispered.
“Oh shit.” Peter gulped. “We need to go find Vision and make sure he doesn’t tell anyone.”
“Let’s go. He’s probably charging or in a bowl of rice or something.” You said and lead Peter out of the room. You went into the kitchen and found Vision at the breakfast table.
“Hey Vision.” Peter smiled awkwardly as you stood beside him.
“Hello, Peter.” Vision said politely.
“So, about the little snafu from before. We just want to make sure you don’t tell anybody about what you saw.”
“Yeah. Because it wasn’t what it looked like.” You added.
“Oh, no? It looked like the two do you were engaging in sexually explicit activity.” Vision replied. You and Peter exchanged a panicked look and tried to think of a way out of this.
“It looked like that, yes, but that’s not what we were doing.” Peter lied as you nodded along.
“Hm. That’s funny. I can detect heart rates and both of you appear to be lying.” Vision said with genuine curiosity.
“We’re not lying, silly.” You forced a laugh. “My heart is racing because I haven’t had any food yet but I drank a bunch of coffee.”
“You know women and their pumpkin spice lattes.” Peter added, earning himself a jab in the side.
“Watch it.” You said through a smile.
“And my heart just beats fast because I have the heart rate of a spider.” Peter added. “No lying here.”
“Oh, I see. But if you two weren’t engaging in sexual activity, what were you doing?” Vision questioned.
“Uhhh…” Peter scratched his head and tried to think of something.
“Peter was just choking on a pretzel and I was getting it out of his throat.” You jumped in.
“With your tongue?” Vision asked.
“Yes?” Peter said weakly.
“With your shirts off?”
“It’s a new technique.” You deadpanned.
“I’m not aware of this technique. Can you demonstrate on me?” Vision asked you.
“Absolutely not.” Peter snapped and stepped between you and Vision. Vision looked at Peter in confusion and you had to jump in again.
“Because it didn’t work.” You explained. “He still choked.”
“He seems fine to me. Although, I am detecting some slight discomfort in the abdomen.” Vision said as he looked Peter up and down.
“I have a tummy ache.” Peter admitted and patted his stomach.
“Would you like me to conduct a physical exam?” Vision asked and held up both his hands.
“No. I probably just have to fart.”
“Oh my God.” You groaned and rubbed your eyes.
“So are we cool? You’re not gonna tell anyone what you saw?” Peter asked Vision.
“We are cool. I will not be telling anyone what I didn’t see.” Vision confirmed.
“Okay. Good.” You sighed in relief.
“Except for Wanda.” He added. “Because I already told her. I tell her everything. I love her quite dearly.”
“Oh my God.” You groaned even louder.
“What did you tell her you saw?” Peter asked him.
“Just you were engaging in-“
“It wasn’t sexual activity!” You exclaimed. “He was choking and I was saving his life.”
“Then why was his penis out?” Vision asked Peter.
“Because…it…was… cold.” Peter said slowly, hating himself with every word.
“Oh my God. Both of you need to stop.” You stated. “Do you think Wanda going to tell anyone about what you thought you saw but didn’t actually see?”
“I’m not sure.” Vision replied. “You’ll have to ask her.”
“Fine. We can ask her.” You sighed and pulled Peter by the hand and brought him to where Wanda was reading on the balcony.
“I don’t want to. She’s scary.” Peter whispered to you.
“We have to talk to her and find out what she knows before she tells my dad.” You whispered back.
“I can whisper too.” Wanda whispered as she suddenly appeared behind the two of you. You both screamed and jumped apart as she laughed. You grabbed Peters hand and ran away, brushing past Natasha as you went.
“They’re a little odd, aren’t they?” Natasha chuckled as she watched you run by.
“They are.” Wanda agreed. “You know, Vision caught them doing it before.”
“What? No way.”
“Yeah. He said he accidentally phased through Peters bedroom wall and caught them.”
“Oh God. Yuck. New fear unlocked. That’s hilarious though.” Natasha laughed at the thought.
“What’s hilarious?” Steve asked as he came into the room.
“Vision caught Y/n and Peter doing it.” Natasha told him.
“What?” Steve laughed. “No way.”
“That’s what I said!” Natasha laughed.
“Honestly, I kinda figured they were doing it. They are the only two in the tower around that age. And lord knows Peter is hornier than an…animal with horns.” Steve said weakly when he couldn’t think of an animal.
“Rhino?” Wanda asked.
“I was thinking Triceratops.” Steve admitted.
“Wait, isn’t there a rule again dating on the team?” Nat asked. “At least, that’s what Tony tells me and Bruce every time we make eye contact.”
“If he had a problem with that, he’s definitely gonna have a rule against one of us dating his daughter. Especially Peter.”
“I thought Peter was a nice boy, no?” Wanda asked.
“He is.” Steve nodded. “But all Tony will see is that he’s a boy who Vision caught with his daughter. He’s gonna blow Peter into a million pieces.”
“I’m pretty sure that’s what Vision walked in on.” Wanda mumbled. From across the room, you and Peter were peeking out from behind a wall to watch them all talk.
“This is bad. They’re all laughing and saying our names.” Peter whispered to you.
“Do you think Wanda told?”
“I don’t know. What if she made them all see it with her mind powers?”
“Why would she do that?”
“Because she’s evil and not to be trusted!” Peter whispered harshly.
“We just need to talk to her and find out what she knows. Maybe she didn’t even believe Vision.”
“Do we have to?” Peter whined. “What if she enters my mind palace?”
“She wouldn’t find much.” You mumbled.
“What was that?”
“Nothing, sweetie.” You patted his cheek and pulled him out from behind the wall. Natasha and Steve had left at that point and Wanda had gone back to her book.
“Hey, Wanda.” You said with an awkward wave.
“Oh. Hello. I haven’t seen you two in forever. What have you been up to?” Wanda said sarcastically.
“Not much. Same soup, just reheated. You know the vibes. So, uh, we just wanted to talk to you about something. Something Vision might have said.” You began.
“Oh. You mean you two swallowing each other alive in Peters room?” Wanda asked. You and Peter exchanged a look and Peter let out a loud gulp.
“Vision doesn’t know what he saw.” You told her.
“Vision is made from the highest form of artificial intelligence. He knows everything.”
“Okay.” You said mockingly. “But he doesn’t know in this specific situation.”
“He’s programmed to access a situation down to every last detail in case there is a threat of danger. And it seemed the only threat of danger in Peters room that day was running out of oxygen. Or maybe a broken pelvis.”
“I’m flattered but I’m not that good.” Peter said humbly.
“He’s right. He isn’t.” You nodded in agreement.
“What was that?” Peter asked you.
“We just want to make sure whatever Vision told you about what he thinks he saw isn’t going to be told to anyone else.” You said to Wanda.
“Now hold on.” Peter tried to go back to what he had heard.
“Secrets safe with me.” Wanda smiled and zipped her lips.
“And me.” Bruce said from behind you. You and Peter whipped around and saw Bruce staring at you while eating a bowl of cereal.
“What?! Were you in here the whole time?” Peter asked.
“Yeah. Wanda, you are funny. How come I never noticed that?” Bruce chuckled.
“I’m not sure.” Wanda shrugged. “You tell me.”
“God damn it. Are either of you going to tell anyone what Vision saw?” You asked and pointed at Wanda and Bruce.
“I thought Vision didn’t see anything?” Wanda smirked.
“Right. Is anyone going to tell my dad about what Vision thinks he saw but definitely didn’t see?” You asked with a hopeful smile.
“Maybe? I don’t understand the question. Can you reword it? Or maybe write it down so I can see it?” Bruce asked.
“Oh my God.” You groaned. “I thought you were the smart one.”
“Ouch. Can you tell your girlfriend to stop being mean to me?” Bruce asked Peter.
“I’m not his girlfriend because we weren’t engaging in sexual activity because we’re not dating. Everyone got that?” You asked angrily.
“Got it.” Wanda nodded.
“No, sorry. Still confused. So you are dating but Vision didn’t catch you guys doing it?” Bruce asked so genuinely that you wanted to scream.
“No, he definitely did.” Wanda snorted. You looked at her in betrayal and she smiled apologetically.
“Oh. Now I get it. You guys are dating and Vision did catch you having sex.” Bruch realized. “But what are we not telling Tony?”
“No one is telling Mr. Stark anything. Everyone just keep your mouth shut about the activities, which may or may not have been sexual in nature, that Vision allegedly walked in on. Okay?” Peter exclaimed.
“My lips are sealed.” Wanda assured you. “Well, now they are. Because I already told Steve and Nat. But that was before you asked me not to tell anyone.”
“Oh my God. Find. Can we trust you?” You asked Bruce.
“I’m not gonna rat. Don’t worry.”
“Thank you.” Peter nodded. “You’re dismissed.”
“I don’t take orders from you.” Bruce snapped and walked away.
“Jesus Christ.” Peter whispered and felt genuinely offended by the tone. You took his hand and brought him away from Wanda to regroup.
“We need to get ahead of this before anyone else finds out we’re secretly dating.” You told him.
“You guys are secretly dating?” Sam asked as he came into the hallway, making you both jump.
“Damn it!” Peter shouted and hit the wall.
“Oh great. Captain fucking America knows now.” You grumbled.
“Since when are you two a thing?” Sam laughed and looked between you and Peter.
“Two months.” You admitted.
“Two months? And Tony still doesn’t know?”
“Do you think Peter would be alive right now if my dad knew?” You asked and gestured to Peter.
“That’s a joke, right?” Peter laughed nervously.
“I guess not.” Sam shrugged.
“Are you gonna tell my dad?” You asked him.
“No.” Sam replied.
“Cool. Thanks.” You sighed in relief.
“But only if-“
“Mother fucker.” You exclaimed now that there was a new obstacle.
“Only if you promise to never bring up that one time with the TV.” Sam continued.
“You mean when you got caught-“
“Zip it.” Sam cut you off. “Or I’ll tell Daddy Warbucks about your affair with Little Orphan Annie here.”
“This whole conversation has been wildly emasculating.” Peter mumbled.
“I never saw anything.” You told Sam.
“Good.” He nodded. “Then we have a deal.”
You went to shake hands when your phone started to ring. You looked at Peter curiously and pulled it out of your pocket.
“Hang on. Hello?”
“Hey short stack. I’m landing in 20 minutes. I can see that most of the team is in the tower today so I thought we could all have a nice, family dinner in the dining room. How does that sound?” Tony asked you through the phone.
“The entire team? In the dinning room? For dinner? Tonight?” You asked as panic grew in your chest.
“Are you playing a one man game of Clue? Just let everyone know, will you?” Tony asked.
“Sure, daddy. No problem.” You laughed nervously and looked at Peter with wide eyes.
“Thanks, peach. See you soon.” Tony said before having up.
“Shit balls.” You whispered once you were off the phone.
“Was that super good news?” Peter asked hopefully.
“My dad wants the whole team in the dinning room for family dinner.” You said and held your breath for his reaction.
“Son of a…” Peter started to shout and then quieted down, “shart mama.”
“I know. It’s bad.”
“This has gotten so out of hand. I’ve never taken this many L’s in a row. I don’t know if I can take anymore. My body is shutting down. I haven’t peed all day.” Peter said as he paced back and forth.
“Keep it together.” You said as you gripped his shoulders.
“Oh no. This is going to be so awkward.” Sam laughed at your misfortune.
“Why? Because everyone knows we’re secretly dating except for Mr. Stark and they also know Mr. Stark will kill them for knowing and not telling him right away so tonight will be a long, uncomfortable game of who tells him first?” Peter asked all in one breath.
“Yes, that’s exactly why.” Sam nodded and looked at Peter strangely.
“I don’t want to go.” Peter whispered and turned to you.
“We all have to go.” You told him. “He’ll get sus if we’re not all there.”
“But what if your dad kills me?” Peter whined.
“Then I’ll wait at least three months before getting a new boyfriend.” You smiled sweetly and patted his chest.
“You can do that but I’ll just haunt him and kill him in his sleep.” Peter smiled back.
“Oh my God. Come on. We have to go get ready for dinner.” You said and pulled Peter to your room.
30 minutes later, everyone was seated in the dining room with Tony at the head of the table. You and Peter nervously peered through the doorway to see what the set up was.
“What’s our plan?” Peter asked you.
“Sit far away from each other and diverge the conversation every time my dad gets close to happening upon the truth.”
“Okay. How hard can that be? We never get together for family dinner. They’ll all be talking so much that you and I won’t even come up.”
You and Peter took your seats at the table with you next to your dad and Peter further away. You made eye contact with Peter and nodded to let him know that you were in this together. Everyone stayed dead silent as the food was passed around and Tony was quick to notice.
“Why is everyone so quiet? Did Sam leave porn on the big TV again?” Tony asked as he chewed his food. You gulped and looked at Peter in a panic. You had been wrong about everyone talking and keeping the attention away from you. Instead, everyone was silent and tense since they didn’t want to be the one to let Tony know what Vision had seen.
“That was one time.” Sam defended.
“But how could we ever forget?” Tony teased him.
“I just wanted to watch Mama Mia. My eyes were burned.” Bucky said as he shut his eyes to keep out the memory.
“Let it go.” Sam said flatly.
“I don’t remember that.” You said robotically. Sam gave you a discreet thumbs up across the table.
“What? You were the one that found it.” Tony reminded you.
“Doesn’t ring a bell. I think you’re all remembering incorrectly.” You said with no much stiffness it sounded like you were reading from a prompter. Tony looked around the table and everyone avoided eye contact with him. They mindlessly pushed their food around their plates to look busy so that Tony wouldn’t ask them anything.
“Why is everyone acting weird?” Tony asked.
“What? We’re not. You’re being weird, dad.” You forced a laugh and patted Tony’s arm.
“Right.” Tony said skeptically. “So, Pete the treat. Any romantic interests at school?”
Everyone turned to stare at Peter, who was in the middle of taking a sip from his glass. Peter started choking on his water for a long time. No one made any effort to help Peter so he just sat there choking for an uncomfortably long period of time. Everyone stayed silent as he Peter coughed, turned red, and clapped his chest to try and get the water out. When he was finally done, he was crying and bright red.
“What?” Peter asked horsely.
“Peter doesn’t want to talk about girls, dad.” You laughed nervously. Everyone exchanged looks while also sneaking glances at you and Peter.
“He does with me. Come on. My dad never bothered with this stuff and I want to break the cycle. Tell me about your love life.” Tony insisted and playfully patted the table. You shot daggers at Peter and everyone turned to look at him. Peter felt sweat dripping down his forehead and smiled nervously.
“There’s no one, Mr. Stark. No girls.”
“I don’t buy that for a second. I can see the hormones brewing in your eyes. You’re sweating just at the thought of her. I know there’s a girl.”
“Maybe.” Peter squeaked out.
“See? I knew it. Tell me about her. She cute?” Tony asked. Peter looked at you for a brief second and quickly looked away.
“Yeah, yeah. She’s gorgeous. Really pretty.”
“She’s all right.” Sam shrugged, making everyone stifle a laugh as your jaw dropped.
“Fuck did you just say?” Peter snapped.
“I was kidding. Damn.” Sam held up his hands in defense.
“Damn, indeed.” Tony laughed. “Way to stand up for your girl, kid. She’s a lucky lady.”
“Thank you, sir.” Peter said and hoped that was the end of the conversation.
“You really are a good kid, Peter. I don’t tell you enough. I was just saying this to Pepper the other day, but if anyone is ever brave enough to try and date my daughter, I hope they’re like you.” Tony said sincerely. This time, you started choking as everyone murmured with amusement.
“Really?” Peter asked hopefully. He looked at you but you didn’t dare make eye contact.
“Yeah. Sure, you’re pretty annoying and way too eager at times, but you’re a good kid. You’re responsible, you care about other people, and you know how to get a decent haircut.” Tony continued.
“So you’d give Peter your blessing? If he and I ever wanted to date?” You asked skeptically.
“Absolutely not.” Tom said immediately.
“What?” Your face dropped. “But you just said-“
“I said I hope the person you date is like Peter.” Tony specified. “But Peter would never be allowed to date you.”
“Why not?” Peter asked and you shot him a look. Everyone else kept their heads down and turned away from Tony so he wouldn’t suspect anything.
“Not that I care. Psh. Peter is lame. I would never date Peter. Haha. But yeah, why not?” You asked your dad.
“Because he’s a superhero. And no daughter of mine is dating a superhero.”
“But you’re a superhero.” You pointed out. “And mom married you.”
“I know. That’s why I’d never allow you to go down the same path. I’ve missed hundreds dates, thousands of calls, and a million important moments because I was off being a superhero. I was saving the world but I was hurting the person I love most in the process. I don’t want that life for you. If Peter was an average guy off the street, I’d be thrilled to know you were dating him. But Peter isn’t average.”
“I know that.” You replied, starting to get annoyed now that your dad was trying to tell you that you couldn’t do something. You were already doing it, but he didn’t need to know that. He needed to know that he couldn’t make your choices for you.
“Ayo. Yeah she does.” Sam snorted. Everyone gasped and looked at him, making him freeze. You and Peter stared daggers at Sam who smiled sheepishly.
“Oops?”
“You little bitch.” You mouthed across the table at him. Tom noticed the way everyone reacted and grew suspicious. He looked at you and noticed you weren’t making eye contact. He then looked at Peter, who looked like he was about to pass out.
“What was that?” Tony asked Sam.
“Nothing.” Sam scoffed and went back to eating.
“Samuel. Tell me what you just said.” Tony said with an eerily calm smile.
“I don’t want to.” Sam whispered.
“Tell me or I will shove your wings so far up your ass-“
“I said she knows Peter isn’t average.” Sam admitted before Tony could finish his sentence. You buried your face in your hands while Peter chewed off all of his fingernails.
“What does that mean?” Tony asked and turned to you.
“I can confirm that as well.” Vision raised his finger as he spoke up. You and Peter looked at Vision in betrayal while everyone else stayed silent.
“Oh my God.” You whispered and rubbed your face.
“What? What’s the big red giant talking about?” Tony asked you again, sounding angry this time. Before you had a chance to think of something, Vision spoke up.
“I’m talking about how I accidentally caught them fornicating earlier today, sir. Also, am I required to be here? I can’t actually eat food.” Vision said politely. Everyone was dead silent as Tony processed what he was hearing. No one dared to look up from their plates or even move a muscle.
“You know what? Vision is right. We should actually all leave. And never return. Bye!” You said and got up from the table. Tony grabbed the back of your shirt and made you sit back down.
“Nobody move.” He said in a low voice. Silence fell over the table again as Tony slowly looked to Peter. That’s when he noticed that Peter had passed out and had his limp head in his dinner plate.
“Wake the son of a bitch up.” Tony ordered. Wanda lifted Peters head by his hair and a green bean stuck to his cheek and forehead.
“Peter?” Tony asked, but Peter didn’t wake up. Wanda shook him, then took his pulse to see if he was even alive.
“He’s unresponsive.” She reported.
“Jesus Christ.” You groaned to yourself as you watched Wanda and Steve try to wake Peter up.
“He peed his pants.” Steve announced, making you groan even louder.
“PETER!” Tony shouted as he banged on the table. Peter woke up and looked around in confusion. Tony slowly stood up and leaned over the table while staring daggers at Peter.
“Somebody tell me what’s going on.” Tony demanded. No one said anything, so you bit the bullet and stood up as well.
“Dad, Peter and I are dating. Vision caught us before and the whole team found out about it. That’s what’s going on, okay? Please, don’t kill my boyfriend.”
“What?” Tony asked as he slumped back in his seat. You couldn’t tell if he was angry or upset, but it was definitely not good.
“Sam was watching porn on the big screen!” You blurted and pointed to Sam.
“You said you didn’t see anything!” Sam pointed back at you.
“That was before you didn’t hold up your end of the deal!” You shouted.
“Shut up, both of you. Are you kidding me right now? You’re dating Peter Parker?” Tony asked in a calmer voice.
“Yes, daddy. I am. I have been for two months. We didn’t tell you because we knew you’d be mad and we just wanted some time together before you forced us apart. I wouldn’t normally lie to you like this but I knew you’d never allow us to be together and I love him. I just needed to love him for as long as I could before the world knew. I’m sorry. Please, don’t be mad at me.” You said as you took your dads hands. Tony stared at you for a long time and finally, put his hand on your cheek.
“I could never be mad at you, princess.” Tony said kindly. You smiled in surprise as Peter let out a sigh of relief.
“I’m gonna turn Peter inside out, though.” Tony said sweetly before lunging at Peter. He punched Peter right in the throat, making Peter collapse to the ground. You rushed to Peters side as Tony shook out his hand.
“Dad! You can’t hit him that hard. He’s only 5’8. He could’ve died.” You yelled at Tony as you pulled Peters head into your lap.
“That didn’t even hurt.” Peter wheezed out as he clutched his throat. Tony wound up to hit Peter again, but stopped when he saw something that surprised him. He watched Peter reached up and touch your face as he whispered to you that everything was going to be all right. He thought he had just been punched in the throat and was awaiting the punishment of a lifetime, his priority was to comfort you when you were upset. Tony then knelt down beside Peter and helped him sit up.
“I’m sorry, kid. I should not have hit you. It was a slight overreaction.” Tony sincerely apologized.
“Slight?” Peter croaked out.
“I just wasn’t expecting to come home to this news. But if it’s been two months and my daughter says she’s this in love, maybe I was wrong. Maybe it wouldn’t be as bad as I thought.”
“Mr. Stark, I know it’s probably hard to think about your daughter dating someone with a life as unpredictable as ours, but I don’t put anything above her. If I’m out on patrol, chances are, she’s hanging out on a rooftop with a walkie talkie telling me where to go. If I have to miss a date to take care of something, I take her with me. She’s my partner in all of this. I don’t leave her waiting around for a text back all night. She comes first.”
“Actually, “Vision began, “when I entered your room, it seemed as though Peter was going-“
“Do not finish that sentence, jumbo tampon.” You cut him off.
“You can trust me, Mr. Stark. You can trust us.” Peter said as he wrapped an arm around you. Tony looked between the two of you for a while but didn’t say anything.
“Please, daddy.” You whispered. Tony finally caved and smiled softly.
“Okay. You’ve convinced me. I’m not gonna kill Peter. You have my blessing, underoos.” Tony said as he helped Peter off the floor.
“Really? You’re not gonna force us apart?” You asked hopefully as you wrapped your arm around Peters.
“I’m not.” Tony confirmed. “You’re old enough to make your own decisions. But if he breaks your heart, he’s getting turned inside out. At least for a day. I cannot compromise on that.”
“Deal!” You clapped your hands before hugging your dad.
“Hold up, do I get a say in that deal?” Peter questioned.
“Don’t push your luck, kid. After what Vision walked in on you doing with Tony’s kid, you’re lucky to be alive right now.” Bruce said as he patted Peter on the back. Tony frowned as he pulled out of the hug.
“Hold on, what exactly did Vision walk in on?” Tony asked. Peter motioned for everyone to keep their mouths shut as Tony looked around the room. When no one answered him, he looked at you expectingly.
“So.” You laughed nervously. “Dessert, anyone?”
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They find out your hands are rated E for Everyone
Just me on my Goofy Shit-
Luffy, Sanji, Zoro, Buggy, Mihawk and GNReader!
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Luffy
Luffy had been in your families restaurant with his crew, all of them eating and enjoying themselves. As a part of the waitstaff you made your rounds- Stopping when a customer was being rather mean to one of your peers.
"Excuse me what seems to be the problem?" You ask sharply, Pulling the crying waitress behind you.
"Problem!? That stupid fucking waitress told me that you can't do the simplest thing of switch out the baked potato with shrimp!?" The man yelled angrily. Your face twitching at his screaming-
"No we don't, Plates come as is- If you got a problem with it you can leave" You say calmly, ready to just have him escorted out till he smacked you across your cheeks.
"Go Get me your Ma UGGHHH!!" You punched hum right in his fat stomach in an instant, watching him crash into the table of food 6ft away with a single blow. The whole Strawhat crew sewing this and was blown away by the force on one punch!
Luffy smiled brightly at this- You were just what he needed on his crew. Those punches he knew could be devastating and needed on a ship. Waving you over with a grin.
"You're a wonderful Fighter! Wanna be apart of my Crew?"
Sanji
Sanji had taken one hell of a liking to you- You didn't know if it was because he was a natural flirt or possibly just that you had a charm to you- But quickly it was lime two partners in crime.
As Partners in crime you two would shop together the most and pick out what the menu would be.
"We should do the Curry tonight and the seafood pasta tomorrow since we will be closed to Shrimp Bay tommorow" You argue with Sanji who laughs you off with a wave. Insisting he knew better of what to make.
As you two walked tou saw a women who looked at the two of you in disgust and sneered specifically at you. Ignoring the look you wanted to just walk past. However she intentially shouldered you rather hard and You heard it- as the Snooty women passed you by.
"(Insert Slur)"
Before you whipped around like a rocket and punched her square in the jaw sending her stumbling to the side with a past and shriek. Sanji staring in shock at this as he saw how hard that punch was-
Sanji knew then, He had to either Date you or pray you find his flirting funny cause he could not take that level of ass whooping.
"You know what- We can make that Curry like you want"
Zoro
You and Zoro have become rather friendly since you joined the crew- he had warmed up to you faster than others had mainly due to how kind you were and open.
The crew had stopped on a small island to restock supplies, you and Zoro going together to get some toiletries and to keep Zoro from getting lost again-
As you two were walking holding the supplies needed for the ship and talking, when you felt it. A quick and hard slap to your left ass cheek which almost made you drop your supplies, turning around quick you saw a women and her friends laughing as they passed by- Clearly having been the ones who had done so.
"(Y/N)? What was tha-" Zoro tried to ask before his eyes widened as you proceeded to punch the girl square in the nose- Her screaming out loudly as you wooped her ass right there in the Market for all to see. Zoro just watching with what can only be described as a amazed look on his face. When you returned he smirked.
"That was one hell of a punch"
Buggy
You and him are sitting at a bar together on a date, You two had been dating for a short time but it was amazing to say the least.
Sharing drinks and nice conversation. Flirting back and forth with each other it had been a lovely time to say the least- That was till a drunk came stumbling towards you two.
"Man what's with the tomato on your nose!! Ha!!"
"Does it glow if you touch it? Is it real? Hahaha"
He started to laugh at his own jokes as Buggy eyes darkened.
Buggy face twist up in anger at hearing this, ready to rip apart the man himself- However his train of thought is stopped as you stood up suddently and gave the hardest right hook he had seen in his life.
You proceeded to quite literally beat the drunkards face black and blue right there in the bar and drag him outside like he was trash- Your face twisted up in anger and blood splashed with blood.
His eyes sparkled at such a sight- He knew right then and there. Not only was he just a tiny bit scared of you.. But he was defiently going to marry you!
Mihawk
You and Mihawk had been very well acquainted with each other for a long time. He respected you and you him-
Today was similar to all others, He had been called to this Marine Base for an unknown reason- walking together side by side you
"I still can't believe they let monsters in the Marines..." You heard a young cadet hiss to his fellow peers.
You turned sharply at hearing this looking right at the Cadet.
"Care to repeat that Cadet?" You ask sharply, the others quickly shrinking away from your gaze however the stupid cadet stood up and walked straight up towards you two.
"I said- I still can't believe they let monste-" He was cut off by the hard rear uppercut you gave him, Hearing his teeth clatter as you began to beat up the stupid Marine.
Mihawk stared with his eyebrows raised, watching you beat the dog shit out of the Marine who dared to insult him. Typically he would have cut just the ignorant man down himself however this was more amusing to him.
Once you were finished and walking back over to him he pulled out a handkerchief to clean.your hands.
"That is very impressive Darling. Come, Id hate for a mess to be on your precious form"
#x reader#one peice x reader#one piece#one peice live action#buggy the clown x reader#buggy one piece#buggy x reader#one piece mihawk#hawkeye mihawk#mihawk x reader#monkey d. luffy x reader#luffy x reader#one piece luffy#straw hat luffy#zoro headcanons#zoro x reader#one piece zoro#roronoa zoro#sanji x you#sanji x reader#vinsmoke sanji#one piece sanji#op sanji#gn reader
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ʚɞ✧˖ˋˏ ༻❁༺ ˎˊ- end of beginning,, pt.2
part one
emily engstler x fem!ex!reader
you got ready in record time. the combination of your nerves and excitement together spurred you into a frenzy, encouraging you to bounce around your hotel room like you were being rushed.
emily said she’d pick you up soon, causing you to hurriedly make the finishing touches on your look tonight. there was that feeling still, deep down, that you wanted desperately to impress her.
the shared conversation you had echoed in your mind the moment the two of you departed. she asked you out to dinner. your mind teetered on the line between two ideas: she wanted closure so you two could be teammates without your history getting in the way, or, maybe she hasn’t moved on.
you think in some ways you have, but was that even true? if emily came to you with a confession of love that she never let go of, what would you do?
there wasn’t time to ponder the thought because your phone dinged. it was a simple message from emily telling you she’s here. ‘waiting for you outside’ she said, simple but enough to make your heart beat faster. you gathered your essentials and left the ghost-like hotel room to meet emily outside.
when you caught sight of her, leaning against her car, hands buried deep in her pockets and ankles crossed, you knew you were done for. she looked so beautiful, no less than you remember.
“hey, sorry, i know i’m a bit early.”
“it’s all good, i was ready anyway.”
she eyes you up and down, smiling to herself because she recognizes the bracelet you’re wearing. it’s one of the many she bought for you during your relationship. a token of her love for you.
“i was thinking we could get some hibachi, your hotel is kinda close.”
you nod, affirming it’s a pleasant choice. the car ride there is filled with simple conversation. you realize it’s the kind of conversation you’d have with someone you barely know, but then again, it’s been two years since you’ve seen emily.
she is different. but so are you.
“okay i’m gonna warn you, i’ve heard mixed reviews about this place.”
the two of you had been seated almost ten minutes ago and still haven’t been given drinks. you didn’t mind much but you could tell by her bouncing leg that emily was losing patience.
“and you didn’t feel like that was worth mentioning earlier?”
“well i remember you like hibachi and this is the only place i know of that serves it.”
she’s giving you a playful shrug as her fingers toy with the lanyard attached to her keys. you can’t help but let your eyes linger, watching her facial features shift slightly when she breaks eye contact or noticing the almost invisible shake in her hands. she seems much more reserved, a lot quieter than you know her to be.
“hey do you remember that time,” she smiles as she pauses to collect her thoughts, “when we got hibachi and the guy accidentally burnt you with the shrimp?”
“oh my god- yes. i still, to this day, have no clue how he managed to flip it on me instead of the stove.”
“dude that was classic. i mean, unfortunate for you but definitely funny.”
emily leans back against the wooden chair, relaxing into the seat. she was looking at you again and still smiling at the contagious happy memory. it was a popular story to tell during your relationship.
“yeah okay, but when i mention that time in the park when you fell on your face it’s not funny?”
“no. you threw the ball way too high. i don’t even know how you threw the football like that.”
“from practicing when we went to the beach that one time, remember? we’d throw the ball on the beach at night.”
all the recounts of priceless stories never to be forgotten makes your chest swell with fondness. to see the way emily smiles when talking about them warms your heart even more because she’s genuinely happy and you sense no resentment in her tone. she’s appreciative of the time she got to spend with you, even if it was short-lived.
“i don’t think i could ever forget that. it was the best vacation of my life for sure. it was so good, school had kinda been stressing me out and all so i was just happy to get away with you. i remember our first night there you wore that really pretty dress, the white one, and you asked me to take pictures of you at sunset but it was so windy and you kept getting mad. oh my gosh you were so mad. i still have the one picture where you’re pulling that piece of hair out of your mouth and you got so upset because i took the picture and sent it to myself. but you looked so beautiful anyway, it was good.”
you don’t say anything, too shocked to properly collect yourself. though you knew ex’s could be friends, you weren’t aware it was like this. you’re in awe of her really, feeling your cheeks grow warm at her compliments of your beauty.
your eyes stay trained on emily but she’s looking straight ahead at the wall, rummaging through all her memories containing you. you’re all she can think about in this moment and she’s not aware how obvious that simple fact is. she was too lost in thought, too busy missing her past to realize her word vomit.
“i remember too how an ocean wave knocked you over and you got a bunch of sand in your hair,” she leans back further, trying to submerge herself in the memory. “and i had to help you wash it out that night cause your arms were tired. then for the rest of the week you made me go in the ocean with you every time so i could help hold you up, i think i can still feel how tight you’d grip me when a wave came. and we’d always get burnt cause we’d float together for ages. but i didn’t even care because i was just happy to be there with you. nothing else mattered to me.”
the intensity of her words finally dawn on emily, immediately stiffening and clearing her throat. the air between you is thick and her confession weighs in the space between. you have no idea how to react or what you could possibly say to her, but you don’t have to because someone is finally asking what you want to drink.
the rest of dinner was tense with very few shared words. every now and then emily would comment on the quality of the food and you’d say nothing in return.
what could you say?
the ride back to your hotel was even worse. the soft hum of the radio and an occasional road bump was the only noise to fill your space. your eyes stayed glued on the sunset out the window the entire time, trying to remember how you ended up in this situation.
you thought back on everything. from the moment emily asked you to be her girlfriend, the moment you broke up with her, to earlier in the night when she asked you out to dinner. anecdotes of your shared past with her flooded your mind and refused to leave. it wasn’t until she parked at your hotel that they drained, leaving you with a teary waterline and regrets of past decisions. and current ones.
“thanks for taking me out tonight.”
“yeah, no problem.” silence lingered as you climbed out of her passenger seat but once you were about to shut the door she spoke up again, “i’m sorry.”
but it was too late and she wasn’t even sure if you heard her because you just kept walking. shaky breaths and silence consumed the walk back to your room, nothing in your mind but blame on yourself.
you should’ve said something, acknowledged her admission and reciprocated it. instead you sat there silently and visibly watched her shrink in on herself.
you were a coward.
you were a coward back then when you broke up with her, not able to face the uncertainty change would bring. it had only gotten worse. you realized that maybe some things don’t ever change.
the harsh opinion you harbored for yourself only made you feel worse. once you reached your room the tears began to fall one by one down your face, a pent-up sob escaping you from your spot on the bed.
emily was still parked outside, watching the time pass by. with each minute she debated on going inside, straight to your room. she wasn’t entirely sure what she’d do or say when she got there, but she just wanted to see you again.
it had been thirteen minutes since you left. thirteen minutes since she saw you. thirteen minutes since the opportunity to win you over again had passed. thirteen minutes sitting in silence waiting for you to text her something, anything. but you never did.
she couldn’t leave knowing she didn’t try.
so she didn’t. she remembered seeing your key card, your floor and room written across it in bold lettering. that’s where she found herself now, standing on your floor gathering the courage to just knock.
finally she did, hearing you shuffle on the other side of the door. she could swear a drop of sweat was dripping down her forehead, bringing the back of her hand up to wipe at it.
“emily?”
“can i talk to you?” she was going to throw up, she was going to throw up, “please?”
“yeah.. are you okay?”
“are you?” emily looks at your face, makeup disrupted by wet streaks and eyes slightly red, red enough to be noticed. her tone came out harsher than she meant it to, pushing her way into the cold room. you don’t answer, instead busying yourself with shutting the door and turning the lights on.
“can i sit down?”
“go for it.”
she props herself up on the end of your bed, hands resting on her bouncing knees as you approach. you lean against the wall a few feet away as she begins to speak.
“i’m sorry for dinner, if it made you feel weird or anything. i think i should tell you, just get it out of the way, that i still think about you. all the time. and, like, i miss you. i know we’ve both probably changed and we’re different people now, i get it. but nothing, nothing, amounts to the way i felt with you. when i saw you today i felt like old me again. i want nothing more than to be like that again.” emily catches her breath, the jumbled confession coming so suddenly. “i went back to louisville last summer, just to see jeff and stuff. being there reminded me of you. i felt better there because i felt like part of you was there with me.”
she looks at you expectantly, waiting for some type of reaction. you just stare at her with an unreadable expression, tears dipping at the corners of your mouth and you bring a gentle hand up to wipe them away.
“do you ever..” she buries her head in her hands, dragging them down her face, “do you ever feel that way? tell me you don’t and i’ll leave if you want me to. i just have to know so that i can move on with my life.”
“emily..”
“it’s okay” she whispers, “it’ll be fine.”
she stands, tucking her flyaways behind her ear. your eyes connect with a silent message as you try to find the right words. you turn your head away from her direction because you feel like she’s peering into you, dissecting every thought and tearing you apart to find what she wants.
“i think about you all the time.”
it’s short but effective. emily’s heart skips a beat and so does yours, the gap between your bodies lessening.
“getting on the court with you again was so amazing and for that reason alone i’m happy to be here. i left louisville because i couldn’t do it without you. and i spent, oh my god, so many nights regretting my decision. i miss you emily. i’ve missed you for two years.”
neither of you have any words left as she surges toward you, pulling your body into hers. your lips meet in a passionate kiss to make up for lost time, finding peace within one another. emily holds the back of your head to press you as close as possible because she fears you’ll slip away again if she doesn’t. she finally has you back, nothing is taking that away from her.
you’re the first to pull away, placing your forehead against her own. your noses rest side by side, lips touching and fingers tangled in hair as you both pant from loss of breath. you’re so relieved that you’re almost convinced it can’t be real.
there’s no negative feelings plaguing either of you anymore, finally feeling complete.
the rest of the night is spent with tangled limbs and gentle kisses to pass the time. she never leaves your embrace and you don’t leave hers, feeling content right where you are.
you can finally wave goodbye to the end of your beginning with emily, ready to move into the next chapter with her.
ʚɞ✧˖ˋˏ ༻❁༺ ˎˊ-
thank you @astroph1les for literally giving me all the motivation to do this
i hope no one forgot about pt.1 i know it’s been a minute 😬😬😬🤗
not spell checked yet but it will be later!!
pls enjoy!!!!!!!
#i love emily engstler#emily engstler i love you#rea loves em#emily engstler fic#emily engstler smut#emily engstler imagine#emily engstler x reader#emily engstler blurb#emily engstler#angst with a happy ending#wlw slay#wlw angst#wlw imagine#wlw yearning#wlw post#masc lesbian#lesbian imagine#lgbtqia#lgbtq#lesbian#bisexual
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Desperate Pleas
This idea is, of course, based on Jack and Maddie finding out Danny is Phantom and not taking it well. They are so distraught though, and can't make the ghost talk and tell them where their baby is. He has his face. They can't bear to do anything to the ghost, so they turn to the GIW. They had partnered with them before, and they helped equip them with all their weapons, so it was only logical they hand over the...specimen.
Of course, the GIW experiments on him and gives a token try at making him admit to doing something to Daniel Fenton. Ellie finds out about Danny being captured and is planning to free him along with Jazz, Sam, and Tucker. Danny didn't know that all of them had prepared for a reveal gone wrong and made go bags.
But with not only Jack and Maddie being against him but also with Jazz, Tucker, and Sam being under suspicion of working with Phantom, it's up to Ellie to get things done. It's her turn to look out for her bro. So they enact their most desperate plan.
Plan W.
The rescue happens with thankfully nobody else getting captured but also with roaring success on all fronts. Tucker was able to scramble and destroy the GIW and the Fenton's data from the comfort of his home and his parents thinking he was playing Doom. Sam was able to help break into the base with Bubbe Ida being an alibi. Jazz was able to get the conjoined go-bags out by the town's welcome sign with the excuse of going on a college touring trip with her friends. (It was true it's just that she left the house earlier than planned and had waited on seeing Danny safe before leaving.)
They all needed to have alibis because of being under suspicion, and the only one who didn't was Ellie. They had to pretend to buy the excuse that Danny was visiting his Uncle Vlad that the Fenton's gave them (Jazz had already decided she would be changing her name when she left for college. They weren't her parents anymore. She already came up with telling them the wrong college from whichever she picked.) Thankfully or not, Vlad had no idea about Danny but Maddie had asked him to cover with Jazz if she called, she told Vlad they were working on a surprise with Danny and didn't want Jazz to find out. Of course, he had been delighted to comply. (Anything for his Maddie.)
Everything had gone off without a hitch...except.
Danny was very injured (Ellie couldn't make herself look at the y-incision besides when she patched him up as best she could.) but they expected that. What they hadn't expected was him to be so freaking tiny!! Seriously! He was a shrimp more than usual. Ellie made the very educated guess that he somehow got de-aged. That plus the green sticky note that had been waiting for her next to an unconscious Danny that told her he was about four years old now and basically eluded that their plan was going to work. The bonus, though, was that apparently the age change happened because of Clockwork and that Danny should be healed by the time they got to their destination. Something about time magic but Ellie wouldn't pay that any mind as long as it helped Danny.
Though she didn't really understand how him being 4 helped anything.
Anyway, besides that small hitch, the plan was going smoothly. They just had to meet Jazz at the sign and go from there. The flight was relatively short.
"Ellie? I wasn't expecting you for a while. Did everything go okay? Where's Danny?" Jazz, of course, was worried when she didn't immediately see her 16 year old brother.
"Sooooo...funny thing. I know we were prepared for him to be...affected by his time in the GIW labs. But uh...I don't think we planned on this affected. But don't worry! Clocky basically said this was needed, so...meet tiny Danny!" Ellie held out the very unconscious toddler so Jazz could see him from under the blanket Ellie had stolen to hide said toddler.
Jazz had been frozen in shock for a good minute before she slowly held her arms out for the toddler. Ellie easily gave her the dead weight and simply floated there awkwardly. "Oh baby brother..." Jazz croaked out as her eyes filled with tears.
"He's going to be okay." Maybe Ellie was trying to convince both of them of that.
Jazz just stood there and gently stroked Danny's hair despite it being sweaty and kinda gross. She did that for a while before an alarm went off, which Ellie guessed was for Jazz to keep track of the plan. So with a soft kiss to Danny's forehead and a small hug she handed him back to her little sister. She wiped her tears and handed over two large duffle bags. One for Ellie and one for Danny.
"I know I don't have to ask, but please...please make sure you two are safe. I don't know what I'd do...." Jazz shook her head. "Just let us know when you reach Gotham...and...and let us know if Plan W works. If it doesn't...we'll figure something out. "
Ellie choked back her own tears and nodded, not trusting her voice. She handed danny bag to Jazz briefly so she could cross the duffle bags on either side of her and took Danny back before Jazz decided to keep him and do who knew what. "I'll be in touch. I promise."
With that, Ellie took off. She couldn't open portals, and she couldn't exactly ask for help in the Zone since, by now, the portals to it should be destroyed. Yeah, even Vald's. All part of good ol' Plan W.
So she flew and flew as fast as she could with as few stops as she could allow before she reached her destination.
So that's how she found herself in front of the whole Wayne family who were all at the Manor conveniently for family dinner, with a laptop open to the PowerPoint that Team Phantom made together about why Bruce Wayne should adopt both Ellie and Danny. Well mainly Danny but like hell was Ellie going to leave him alone.
She had found out that Bruce Wayne was Batman and only told Team Phantom because it could be useful to their Save Danny's Behind Plans. Turns out it was useful.
Hopefully, Mr. Wayne agreed. The PowerPoint was pretty solid, so Ellie had faith. But she would definitely love some feedback from the gobsmacked family, please.
#dpxdc#dc x dp crossover#dc x dp#dc x dp ficlet#de aged danny#older sister ellie#jazz fenton#danielle “ellie” masters#danny fenton#danny phantom#sam manson#tucker foley#jack and maddie bashing#jack and maddie fenton#giw#ghost investigation ward
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Spencer Reid x she/her!reader
A/N: guess who’s back with another shrimp reid fic. that’s right, you guessed it, Im ovulating
gif from an unnamed source on google so if it’s yours please let me know and I’ll credit!! ♡
Mean It
The bond you have formed with the resident genius of the BAU is one that you treasure. Every morning, you are most excited to practically skip into the office with the brightest smile on your face, just for him. The wonder, the magic that is Doctor Spencer Reid, and you are lucky enough to call him your closest friend.
He is endlessly fascinating to you. Unlike the rest of the team, you have never once cut one of his rambles short, you have listened to each and every one in its entirety, with stars in your eyes.
The two of you talk about anything and everything, from the most mundane smalltalk to the deepest philosophical debates, and you enjoy every moment spent in Spencer’s company.
However, as you perch on Spencer’s desk in what has become a morning tradition, the look on your face as you glance around the office makes your dear friend’s heart sink, because he knows who you are looking for.
And right on cue, Derek Morgan strolls into the office, yelling an overly enthusiastic question that is - much to Spencer’s dismay - ritualistic, too.
“WHERE’S MY PRETTY GIRL?”
The beaming smile on your face as you hop off of Spencer’s desk and run into Derek’s open arms is worse than a bullet wound, which Spencer knows to be true without any actual proof.
He watches on, wondering if his skin is turning green with jealousy, as Derek picks you up and spins you around, the two of you laughing like it’s the funniest thing in the world. What’s so funny about that? Spencer thinks bitterly, frowning at his computer and forcing himself to shift his focus, though his subconscious continues to grumble. If he was ever allowed the privilege of holding you like that, the last thing he’d do is laugh about it.
Thankfully, the morning event is over as quickly as it began, and you skip back over to Spencer with a smile that’s different to the one you had for Derek. What shade of green is Spencer now?
“Sorry about that, Spence, gotta reach my daily hug quota!” You chime.
Spencer’s stomach drops. He wants so badly to offer his own services, to perhaps suggest some variety in who is allowed to meet your daily-hug-quota and enquire whether you’d consider his application, whether he meets your criteria. But, in what can only be described as the worst preconceived notion in human history, Spencer does not like physical contact in the majority of circumstances, as you have well known since the day you met him and he proposed a kiss would hold less germs than a handshake, which made you blush in a way his eidetic memory has never let him forget. He wishes, more than anything, he could travel back in time to that very day, to add a clause to the contract he’d bound himself to, some fine-print that said ‘physical contact from and with (Y/N) is the only exception to every typical circumstantial preference for no physical contact’. Alas, Spencer Reid had unintentionally doomed himself.
Today is a rarity, in which the team have spent the day confined to the BAU building, filing case reports and talking amongst themselves. You speak to Spencer most of all, because on the occasion anyone else speaks to him, he finds he is too distracted by you to fully focus his efforts on the conversation.
As per usual, you wait at the elevator doors for Spencer, never walking out of the office without him in an unspoken gesture of your sweet appreciation for his company.
“Oh, Spence, did you want to have a Doctor Who sleepover tonight?” You suggest suddenly, causing Spencer’s eyes to widen and his heart to skip simultaneously.
“Y-Yes! Of course!” He blurts out, perhaps a little too quickly. Perhaps, he should have paused for a beat, giving you the impression he had been able to form a degree of a coherent thought before he answered you.
Instead, Spencer spends the elevator ride down to the ground floor glancing at you with a dazed look in his eyes, like you are the first star he’s ever seen and he’s too shy to look at you for too long. Why would he be shy in the presence of a star? Stars are out of his reach, beyond the realm of his capability to hold. That metaphor had been far more applicable than he’d realized.
The drive to your house is spent in accordance with your typical pre-sleepover routine; Spencer says he doesn’t mind what music you play, and you select one of your many playlists at random, singing and dancing in such a theatrical way in the passenger seat of Spencer’s car that he truly wonders if he didn’t have an IQ of 187, would he be able to split his focus between adoring you and concentrating on the road?
In what feels like no time at all, you and Spencer are sitting on your sofa with a blanket each and a bowl of popcorn between you that Spencer finds himself internally cursing with every unkind word he knows, as he does each and every time that pathetic plastic bowl forms an impassable barrier between him and you. Occasionally, his fingers are lucky enough to brush yours if you happen to reach for popcorn at the same time. You always chuckle like it’s a coincidence, never quite catching onto the way in which Spencer studies your movements in his peripheral vision to calculate, down to a fine science, how long it takes you to finish one handful of popcorn before you’ll reach for another, and he can just so happen to plan his movements accordingly. All for a brush of your fingertips. In truth, Spencer would run through a burning building just for the chance to hold your hand, even if it wasn’t promised. The chance, that’s all he needs.
In the midst of what is otherwise a very traditional evening shared between the two of you, Spencer feels different. The more he thinks about how this evening could play out if Derek Morgan were in his place, the more Spencer wonders if his eyes are playing tricks on him or if the skin of his hands is turning green with jealousy. Would the bowl of popcorn be in the same place? Would it be on your lap, or Derek’s, allowing the two of you to sit closer, considering you already showcase just how comfortable you are together? Or would it be on the coffee table, leaving no obstruction between you and Derek at all? Would his arm be around you, and would your arm be around him in return? Would you be telling Derek the pieces of movie trivia that Spencer had been the one to tell you, when you watched a movie with Derek that you had previously seen with Spencer? Do you wish Derek was here with you instead? ‘Nauseous’ is too small a word and does not contain enough profanities.
“I’m not gonna get through all this popcorn on my own, Spence.” You chuckle quietly, having noticed that your company hasn’t reached for popcorn in some time due to how cold your hand feels, having not flushed at the sensation of his fingertips in too long.
“Sorry, not hungry.” Spencer murmurs.
The sadness in his voice sets off alarm bells in your head immediately, and you pause the movie, discarding the bowl of popcorn that Spencer’s scowl follows all the way to the coffee table, while you turn to face him on your couch.
“Spence, what’s the matter? Do you feel sick?” You ask gently.
Yes, actually, viscerally.
“Nothing, I’m-“
You shake your head, the only time you’ll ever cut him off is when he tries to deflect. “Don’t. I can see something’s wrong, and if you don’t want to tell me, that’s okay, but can you please tell me what I can do to help?”
Of course, Spencer’s feelings for you have a solid foundation in the perceptive and attentive person that you are, forever seeing right through him.
“Do you…Do you ever have movie nights with Morgan?” He asks timidly, his head hanging in shame, his gaze fixed on his lap.
Spencer’s question completely catches you off guard, and your jaw drops, an amused smile gracing your features in utter bewilderment.
“What? No, Derek’s never even stood on my doorstep, Spence, why do you ask?” You question the motives of his query, and he sighs in defeat.
“I just figured…you’re so comfortable with him, you must want to spend time with him outside of work, too. I guess I just don’t understand why you’d invite me instead. Do you pity me, or something?” Spencer asks in a dejected and small voice.
The cogs in your brain are turning, your expression softening in turn.
“Spencer, I don’t pity you, I invite you because I enjoy spending time with you.” There’s a delicacy to your words, recognising his fragile state.
And Spencer’s foolish, lovesick heart sings from beneath the ruins at your words, at the tiniest spark of hope that is immediately suffocated by his own insecurities.
One word from you has the power to make and break him, all at once.
“But you enjoy Derek more.” Spencer’s voice breaks on the last word he speaks, and he closes his eyes in a pained blink, turning his face away from you completely in an effort to shield himself from the kindness he’ll see in your gaze. “You sit with me every morning while you wait for him, and the second he’s there, you’re gone. The way you smile at him isn’t the same way you smile at me. I understand that you don’t feel the same way about me, but I don’t understand why you’d waste any time on me outside of work, based on that.” Spencer is trying his absolute best to phrase everything he says in his usual objective, matter-of-fact tone, but the hurt in his words is so clear.
“Spencer,” You sigh gently, “Will you look at me, please?”
He shakes his head. “Can’t.”
“Why not?” You ask in the same soft voice that makes his heart ache.
“I’ll forget how much this hurts the moment I look at you.” Spencer mutters.
“Don’t you want to forget?” You question, almost pleading.
Spencer shakes his head. “If I forget, I’ll throw myself back into the same cycle of pining for you, living off of your smiles and glances and the instances where I make you laugh.”
Your heart breaks at his words, and for a few seconds, you don’t say anything. The very moment the idea enters your mind, you reach for Spencer’s hand, holding it gently in both of yours, and immediately, his wide eyes have turned to stare at you.
And your tears. You must have only started crying after you last spoke to him, because if you had been crying in the midst of your reply, Spender wouldn’t have been able to hear anything else.
And just like he predicted, the sight of you makes him forget every ounce of his own pain, his heart breathing a sigh of relief and reaching out for you in pure anguish at the sight of you, in tears.
“Why are you crying?” Spencer asks, his voice barely above a whisper. If it wasn’t for your tears, the way you are holding his hand would render him incapable of forming a single word.
“Because you have no idea that you’re my favorite person in the universe, Spencer.” You sniffle.
Spencer frowns slightly. “Please don’t say that if you don’t-“
“I mean it.” You cut his deflection short again. “I come into the office every morning excited at the thought of seeing you, and I stay sitting on your desk, as close to you as I’m allowed to be, until we’re forced to work; the only time I leave your desk in the mornings is to briefly greet Derek, because he is the only person who knows how I feel and he hugs me in the way I wish you would, to make me feel better.” You explain through your tears. “And you’re right, I don’t smile at you the same way I do at Derek.”
Spencer is uncertain as to whether his heart has given out entirely.
He blinks. Once. Twice. And a third time. Then rapidly, six times, to blink the tears away that dared blur the perfect vision of you in front of him.
“I treat you differently to Derek because I adore you enough to never want to risk overstepping your boundaries with physical contact. I sit on your desk to resist hugging you every morning, I put a bowl of popcorn between us whenever we watch a movie because I’m afraid I’ll subconsciously lean closer to you, and it hurts to put those limitations in place, to feel the ever present distance between us, but I don’t care, because I do it for you, and I’d do it for you forever.” You add, the words falling from your lips so easily, Spencer can almost feel how long you’ve been holding them in.
“(Y/N)…” He chokes out the only word his heart and soul can remember in this moment.
“I never meant to make you feel like you are less important, or that I like you less- I’m so sorry.” The waterfalls from your eyes are too constant for you to manage now, and you let go of Spencer’s hand to hold your own face instead, hiding yourself and your guilt from him in your state of vulnerability.
Spencer glances at the popcorn bowl on the coffee table for a fraction of a second, before he shuffles over on the couch to occupy the space he had been aching to steal from that bowl since your very first sleepover, and very slowly, he wraps his arms around you. And it’s instinctual, the way your hands come away from your face as you wrap your own arms around his neck, your face finding the home it had always longed for in Spencer’s shoulder. As if slotting into place, you find yourself sitting on his lap with no real understanding of how you got there, because all that matters is that he is holding you there.
“I’m sorry for getting jealous, I had no right to.” Spencer’s apology breaks the silence, and he speaks into your hair, his every sense soaking in the sensation, the scent of you.
“I’m glad you did, but you didn’t need to. I’ve been yours since the day we met.” You say, as if your words are a casual statement and not life-altering in a way that changes Spencer Reid’s very brain chemistry.
“You’ve been mine?” He repeats your statement as a disbelieving question.
Wiping your tears with your sleeve, you sigh dramatically. “Yep. Just waited around for you to notice.”
And Spencer can’t quite believe it, but he laughs, shaking his nose into your hair and holding you tighter against his chest.
“I’m sorry for being oblivious, in that case.” He apologizes, his tone more lighthearted now.
“I’m sorry too.” You chuckle.
“From what I understand of confession-scenes, they are not supposed to contain this many apologies.” Spencer muses, making you laugh heartily, his soul very nearly rising out of his body at the sound.
“Everyone knows the best confessions have a bit of angst.” You joke, and Spencer nods, laughing with you.
“And you do have a proclivity for dramatics.” Spencer teases, and you playfully poke his chest, the two of you sharing a giggle like a pair of giddy teenagers.
A pleasant minute of silence passes as you revel in holding each other, an intimacy once pined after finally being felt in full-force, until a question rises in you that simply has to be asked, or you will burst.
“Does this mean that, going forward, our sleepovers can include makeouts?” You pull away from Spencer’s chest enough to watch the shade of pink blossom in his cheeks, his pupils dilating as he looks into your eyes, and he nods.
“I-I believe that is a feature that is well-worth adding to our list of sleepover activities.”
And when he says it like that, how can a girl be expected to do anything but kiss him senseless in response?
#spencer reid#spencer reid x reader#spencer reid imagine#criminal minds#criminal minds x reader#criminal minds imagine#x reader#imagine#imagines#fanfic#fanfiction#headcannon#headcannons#Spotify
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THEY SENT HIM TO AN EATING SHOW WITH ENTERITIS???
#shrimp thoughts#??????????#what is this 😨 seriously 😨 if he's sick then he should rest. and if he's okay/recovering then don't bring it up and just say he's going to#eat carefully because he was sick a while ago! and that would be enough. do they not get to have any privacy whatsoever...#though maybe it's different in asian countries because i still remember the girl from qi hun talking about having the shits of the century#after a 'weight loss' tea to a group that VERY MUCH consister of the guy she had a crush on#and it wasn't just a passing mention it was the whole POINT of the story! dgmw it was funny but still got me ???ing
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I'm not sure if this counts as a request for 'Shrimpy Chronicles', but do you have any headcanons regarding Coral and Pearl or the triplets (Poppy, Moss, Lumiro) as grown ups/teens? I can only imagine how some of them might be troublemakers like their Dad(s)
Bonus if Shrimp Yuu is wailing because her babies are growing up like: "Why would you leave me!?"
See I think it would be funnier if one of the Dads was wailing, the obvious answer would be Azul but like Floyd wailing and wrapping himself and his tail around his kiddos is a way funnier image to me.
I have a few ideas for the kids, part of me wants to make them just like Jade and Floyd, but realistically they wouldn't be the exact type of menaces their fathers were.
As teens, both of them are relatively straight forward and socialites. Compared to the (adult) twins, they're not fairly intimidating, so they're very easy to approach or be approached by. This is partially because they appear a lot more human thanks to Shrimpy Yuu's genetics. But it's also because the Leech family is lowkey training them for a...different part of the family business, one that requires them to be charismatic and to blend in with the crowd.
Unfortunately, that last one is a bit hard as, despite them being rather sociable, are also quick to gossip and even start fights if it entertains them. Coral especially likes to whisper into other's ears and make little 'suggestions' to people, rile them up so to speak, and watches in glee as she and Pearl bet on who will win the fight she causes. Pearl is just very curious (or impulsive), so she tends to get into all sorts of situations just to see what will happen if she touches that big red button that says 'DO NOT TOUCH'. Anything that happens after is totally not her fault! They shouldn't have made that button soooooo touchable!
Unlike Jade and Floyd, who enjoy personal space and doing their own thing (and even often fought as kids for annoying each other), Coral and Pearl are attached at the hip. If one likes one hobby, the other will find herself doing a similar, if not the same hobby just to hang around her. It's quite funny to see growing up, as neither particularly realizes it when one picks up drawing, the other does painting. One starts baking, the other starts cooking.
The funniest is when both try to do the same thing, but in each other's space. Once, Pearl took up reading horror novels and Coral started hovering over her shoulder to see what her sister was up to. After about 10 minutes, Coral as completely splayed over the top of the chair, cheek pressed against Pearl's as they both read the book together. They're very fond of each other, though they have their squabbles (usually over food, they both are gluttons).
The triplets I haven't thoughts as much about so I don't have much to share about them...ask again later lol
#mochi asks#twst#twisted wonderland#jade leech#floyd leech#twisted wonderland x reader#twst x reader#jade leech x reader#floyd leech x reader#azul ashengrotto x reader#azul ashengrotto#jade/azul#floyd/azul#twst oc#twisted wonderland oc#shrimpy chronicles
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🍰 ˚₊‧꒰ა my faves as your roommate ໒꒱ ‧₊˚
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fc: atsushi nakajima, akutagawa ryuunosuke, louisa may alcott, HP lovecraft, ivan goncharov, sigma, fyodor dostoevsky
cw: college au, ooc charas, pure fluff, g/n reader, reader is lowk awkward, mentions of overdose
a/n: wow.. first post (GEULPP) I'm nervous, I hope you guys enjoy this though!! <33
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♯ 🍓┆Atsushi Nakajima .ᐟ
The sweetest roommate EVER.
You have a buttload of assignments? He'll help you! You made a mess? He'll clean it for you! You're sick? He'll take care of you.
He's genuinely so nice it makes you tear up a bit..
Always trying to find a way to find a conversation with you, oh you like working out? That's crazy because he suddenly has a membership card a few days later!.. you like anime? His favorite is the same as yours!
Shares the most concerning stories about his past and brushes it off as nothing..
And then you just stare at him dumbfounded.
Gifts you stuff as his apologies! Mostly stationery stuff, or stuff that you like.
♯ 🍮┆Akutagawa Ryūnosuke .ᐟ
Never interacts with you.
Never.
Only talks to you when he needs something
That doesn't go the same for you though, you lost your keys? That's on you.
He's a light sleeper, so if you're cramming your studies in the middle of the night making a bunch of unnecessary noise, he's wide awake.
He really needs his sleep.
Only stays on his side of the dorm, if he dropped something that somehow rolled over to your side, he'll ask you to fetch it for him. (Who does he think he is)
If you're a quiet person, he'll probably tolerate you.
♯ 🥨┆Louisa May Alcott .ᐟ
Was scared of the idea of sharing a dorm at first,
Eventually you grew onto her, but it took like A LOT of time
Sometimes, you'd see her pass out on her desk while she's studying
So you cover her up with a blanket..! (this became a frequent thing)
Louisa always notices the blanket as soon as she wakes up and feels sheepish about it,
You assure her it's fine! But you're still concerned about the fact she just LITERALLY passed out.
Sometimes asks for you to leave the dorm whenever she's doing her assignments,
And you're like, huh???..???
You shrug it off anyways.
You invite her whenever you're going out!
♯ 🥧┆H.P Lovecraft .ᐟ
He's literally non-existent
Never talks to you, only talks when you start up a conversation with him first.
He's genuinely terrifying
His side of the dorm is practically empty, he sleeps on one pillow.
He genuinely does not gaf
Whenever you're going out, he'll sometimes sleep on your bed to see if your bed is more comfortable than his.
(it is!)
Overall, he's just there, doesn't really do anything.
♯ 🥞┆Ivan Goncharov .ᐟ
High-key low-key a neat freak
He mentally disturbs you sometimes due to how unpredictable his emotions are, since he's constantly happy all the time.
Usually talks about Dostoevsky to you.
Lets you wrap his head with bandages if he's feeling lazy, but he's like, VERY detailed on how he wants it to be wrapped.
If you're a messy person then he's gonna be a real pain in the ass
If the two of you were to share a bathroom, literally the whole bathroom would be filled with shampoo bottles or whatever thingamajigs he has.
Whenever you're going out, he ALWAYS asks you to run an errand for him.
“while you're on the way, can you buy me..”
You're his errand person.
♯ 🍪┆Sigma .ᐟ
A chill roommate
His hair does concern you.. like, what even is that?? A Christmas tree??..??
It does feel nice to braid it though, the white and purple strands go well with each other when it's tangled up.
Never lets you cook, like no trust at all
Insists that y'all should just get take out instead,
Rude, but oh whatever..
Do you think he's the type of guy to show you funny videos of animals
Idk man...
♯ 🥯┆Fyodor Dostoevsky .ᐟ
His appearance genuinely concerns you,
He definitely has a shrimp posture when he's sitting.
Definitely stays up until 6 in the morning.
Only drinks like coffee for the whole day,
You try to pursue him into eating more, but he declines everytime.
However if he WERE to sleep, he'd definitely talk during his prayer before going to sleep.
(his prayer would be 10 minutes long)
One time, you caught him drinking a pill in the middle of the night thinking he was overdosing,
Turns out he had just forgotten to take his iron supplements.. whoops.
Impossible to sleep around him, his screen is always blaring a bright screen on his computer. (Unless you somehow manage to sleep around that.)
#bsd#bungou stray dogs#bsd x y/n#bsd x you#headcanon#headcanons#atsushi hcs#atsushi bsd#atsushi x reader#atsushi x you#akutagawa x reader#akutagawa ryuunosuke#akutagawa x you#louisa may alcott#louisa bsd#hp lovecraft#lovecraft bsd#sigma#bsd sigma#sigma x reader#sigma x you#ivan goncharov#ivan bsd#fyodor x reader#bsd fyodor#fyodor dostoevsky#fyodor x you#fyodor dostoyevsky bsd#ivan x reader#louisa x reader
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