#full circle endings are not worth this what are DOING here what’s going ON

[natbplease]

hatred and contempt and wrath and malice is stored in the last five minutes of how i met your mother

[melminli]

BANG BANG BANG lll

summery - thanos was always just such an easy person to argue with. you really hated the guy and that was something that was never going to change, even if your life was on the line and it fucking was.

pairing: (thanos) choi su-bong x fem. reader

word count: 2.8k

contains: violence, drug use and addiction, dark content - just usual squid game stuff really

a/n: many wished for a part 3, so here you go!

prev. | masterlist.

Money, money, money - must be funny, in the rich man's world? And you know what, it probably was. Though, it wasn't as if a single fucking person in this room would know that. Otherwise, you all wouldn't be here in the first place, would you now?

There were a few among you who couldn't shake off the desire to understand those lyrics, even if it meant risking your lives for it. Well, and by a few you meant more than half of the people around here. You would bet that they would put even more on the line if they had anything else, but no - your own life was all you had and maybe well, the life of the others around you.

All it took was stuffing a few banknotes into a golden piggy to make all the other pigs hope that it could be them up there - that they could be the lucky person that got the money. It seemed to be true, you could take people's lives but not their stupid hope. The one thing that would still be the demise of many, it had to. The prize money wouldn't increase without their sacrifice, after all.

Everyone knows how stories like that ended. You know, the ones where desperate people fight against each other for a chance? Watching all the glowing faces when the prize money was announced after the first game ended, was like watching a beaten-up dog that someone put outside - only to lure it back into the house with a bowl of food. It was just sick. Well, at least it made you sick.

Your lower lip wouldn't stop quivering and you tried to stop it by biting it, but to no avail. You were sweating while still freezing simultaneously and you were very much familiar with the signals your body was trying to send you. However, you tried to ignore them as best as you could, just like you did with everything else right now.

“Hey, you're really not going to talk to me? What if I die in the next game and the last thing you did was ignoring me?” Thanos' incredibly annoying voice spouted some bullshit again as he leaned against your bed while standing up. He had been trying to get your attention for a while now but you were stubborn and continued to show him your back. He raised an eyebrow questioningly as he nudged you with his hand. “Do you really want this on your conscience? Hey, are you serious? I thought that -”

Thanos stopped what he was saying when you turned aggressively to face him with a rather angry look on your face. He slowly brought his hand back to him as your eyes continued to glance at him with that look. “No, you don't think and that's the problem.” you spat out the words full of venom and tried to control yourself when your eyes shifted to the blue label with the circle on his chest. “Why should I care if you die in the next game, huh? You obviously want to keep playing, you -” and you searched for a word to curse him out, but there just wasn't one that could wrap up your feelings at this moment.

It happened again - he took another chance away from you to just live your life. Maybe it wasn't entirely fair of you to blame him when it was a whole group of people who had voted to stay here, but you stopped caring about what was fair a long time ago. “Whatever, nothing matters anymore anyway.” you laughed out in exasperation as you ran your shaky hand over your face. “I'm going to die next round anyway, but I guess that suits you pretty well, huh? You know, since that means that another 100 million won goes into your pretty piggy bank?”

It was a large sum of money, no question, but - was your life really only worth that much?

Thanos grabbed your arm in annoyance as he shook his head in disbelief at what you were saying. You weren't just a sum of money to him and he didn't understand why you would think that. Yes, he admitted that he fucked up all the time and he had never been the best friend to you, but - if there was one thing, one person that he could care about - that would be you, no questions asked. He still did after all these years, even if he didn't say it, even if he did it in his own twisted way. “Are you crazy? Stop talking stupid shit, you're not going to die!” He exclaimed angrily, not even considering that as an option. “If you'd just stop being so fucking stubborn and join my team, you'd know that too.”

You laughed. “What team? You and your little boyfriend back there?” you asked him as you looked at the guy a little further behind you. He seemed like a good tag-along waiting for his boss. How cute, you were about to throw up. “I doubt you two idiots are going to increase my chances of staying alive.”

Thanos looked at you offensively. “Nam-su is not my boyfriend, okay? And we may still be few, but that will change soon. Can't you just - please trust me? Please?” he just straight up started begging and to be honest, you didn't have much energy left for any arguing at this point.

You wish you had the privilege of being able to say that everything was easier back when you two were kids, but your life was exhausting even then. Your mother had too many children with a deadbeat man like your father and after you were born, they put all their hope in you for some reason - to get them out of their miserable poor lives. You weren't some hero, not then and not now. “Do you know why I have so much debt?” you finally asked Thanos tiredly and he just looked at you silently before shaking his head.

You nodded. Of course, he didn't know, you had never told him since you preferred to cut him off. “Because I lost my scholarship at university after they found out I was a fucking crackhead,” you answered him with a depressed smile. “And it doesn't really help much to be smart or anything if you don't have any money. That was my only chance to pay my way through to not end up like this but now I have to figure out how to pay for all that without working myself to death at a fucking minimum wage job,” you told him.

You thought you could finally get rid of some of the stress - try again with the money you would earn here. Simply giving up your studies wasn't an option, since that would mean that you had to work shitty jobs which didn't pay much for your entire life and not just while studying. You refused to face the same fate as your mother - dropping out after she found out that she was pregnant with you was the first mistake that led to many more.

But of course, you would never complain ever again - hell, you would much rather prefer working every night shift in the world if that would mean that you could get out of here. “And you know what I've been thinking ever since? That if I had never asked you as a stupid kid if I could play with your Iron Man figure, none of this would have ever happened to me.”

This is just fucking great. Fucking bullshit. Thanos angrily smacked himself on the head, knowing he deserved all of this. Yeah, you probably even made the right decision by cutting him out of your life back then, but he still couldn't help but continue to be selfish and want you. He wanted you in his life even if he was the worst thing that ever happened to you because you know what? It didn't change the fact that you were still the best thing that would ever happen to him.

He had been a selfish asshole his whole life and that wouldn't change now, so he couldn't just let you go. “Look, it's just one more game. The money we would have gotten if we quit wouldn't even be enough to buy a Lamborghini and I have to afford at least…” he had to strain his head a little and count with his fingers. “…four of them to pay off my debts. Hell, maybe enough people will die in the next round and there'll be even some left over. I'll also give you back all the money I owe you, I promise! And I'll give you even more if you need it. I want to help you, I really do,” he tried to explain, knowing that he would have more than enough once he took Myung-gi's share too.

He just doesn't understand. You sighed tiredly. “Whatever, I don't really care anymore,” you said and finally gave in. “Okay, sure, I'll join your stupid loser team. Just stop bugging me.”

Thanos smiled broadly and didn't stop himself from pulling you into a weird hug. “You won't regret this! I'll take care of you, okay?” he clarified, and even though he claimed the opposite, you couldn't help but feel like you'd regret it - you always did. “We're going to get out of here and everything will go back to the way it was before, okay?”

You just looked at him and said nothing more as Thanos continued to hold you, finally noticing your slightly poor physical condition. He knew how to solve the problem as well as you did, but even in his current befuddled state, he wasn't sure if he should offer you a pill. “Oh, um - I know this probably isn't the right time for this, but it still feels like I should ask…” he spoke up, looking down at his cross necklace.

You tried to hold back. At least for now. “Ehm, no, I'm fine -” you declined with a slight shake and nodded. “Yes, I'm fine, I'll just go to sleep - exactly.”

You could already tell that this night wasn't going to be an easy one, but as you watched Thanos and that Nam-su guy shoo a few other people out of their beds around your area, so that they could take their place, you knew for sure. How embarrassing, you thought to yourself as you pulled the blanket over your body and hoped that the lights would go out soon.

“Welcome to your second game. We will begin shortly, and this game will be played in teams. Please divide into teams of five in the next ten minutes. Let me repeat -”

I guess we won't be playing Dalgona, after all. You didn't really blame the previous winner of the games, too much. After all, he was in the same shoes as all of you.

“So, we need two more people,” Nam-gyu stated correctly as Thanos confidently slapped him on the back, not doubting picking the best from the pool of players. “Yeah, let's see who we can find. Preferably someone with a lot of muscle and strength,” he said, although you weren't sure what the point of that was since you would be playing children's games. Although, on second thought, the strong kids always managed to win the easiest back then, too…

Thanos looked at you as he pointed his index finger at the ground. “You, wait here. We won't take long,” he commanded you as if you were his pet and you felt your eyebrows twitch slightly at the audacity while you silently watched the two guys go away.

Of course, you didn't listen to what he said and just looked around the crowd yourself when you saw how most of the players had already formed groups. I don't want to be in a team with four idiots, you thought to yourself as you saw two people who seemed to be talking to each other. They seemed to be around your age which made you a bit more comfortable when approaching them. “Excuse me…” you said shyly when you met them because talking to strangers still was something that made you a little nervous. “Would you mind if I joined you?”

The players with the numbers 380 and 125 on their chests looked slightly surprised in your direction. The woman looked at your figure briefly before crossing her arms in front of her. “We are only two, so far.” she clarified before your own number seemed to catch her attention. “Hey, aren't you the one who's always hanging out with that crazy purple-haired guy? I would have expected you to be on a team with him?”

You stroked your hair, slightly uncomfortable. "Did you really notice that? Shit, now everyone probably thinks I'm friends with this guy, how embarrassing,” you mumbled to yourself, and the girl just grinned slightly at your appearance while the shy boy looked at you in confusion. “He's like an annoying tick. He just won't leave me alone. Otherwise, I really wouldn't bother with him! You have to trust me!” you begged her, trying to salvage whatever was left of your image.

And speaking of the devil, it didn't take much longer for Thanos to shout out your name after you said that. “Hey! I told you to stay there, what's so fucking hard to understand?!” he spits out annoyed as he grabs you by the shoulders to shake your body before you can even think of hiding from him. Finally, he noticed the other two next to you. “Who are they?” he asked you as you pushed his hands away.

“I want to be on their team,” you announced.

He looked unbelieving and betrayed. “But you promised me you'd be on Team Thanos!”

“Well, I was clearly lying. So, you'd stop bugging me.”

Thanos looked at you with narrowed eyes before glancing at the two other guys he had recruited along with Nam-guy. “You two - go find another team. Now,” he said simply as he copied your posture and made a counter announcement. “Because we're going to unite our teams. You can't get rid of me so easily, you're staying with me.”

Of course. The player with the number 380 on her chest threw an arm around your shoulder as she looked challengingly at your annoying friend. “And who says that we would want to do that?” she posed the question.

Nam-gyu already knew he didn't like this one. “Hey, who do you think you're talking to -” he started to threaten her, but Thanos put his arm out in front of him before he could go after her.

There was a brief, strange silence as the rapper shifted his gaze between you and the other girl next to you. This girl doesn't look straight, is she interested in…?

Thanos narrowed his eyes as his gaze met yours again and he could feel his muscles tense at the things that were running through his head right now. Number 380 was provoking him with her actions. This shit makes me fucking angry, man. But it only took him maybe a few seconds of imagining the whole thing between you two a bit further to change his mind. Never mind, that's actually pretty hot.

“You're safe as long as the great Thanos protects you, eh? Besides, I doubt you'll find anyone better, there are only two minutes left.” he suddenly spoke out and none of you wanted to know what went on in his head in the short time that he was silent. “Come on, this is going to be fun! Who's the little guy behind you?” he asked and you and number 380 looked at each other reluctantly for a moment before revealing your hidden member.

Nam-guy let out a heavy sigh as his eyes met the loser in front of him but Thanos didn't seem to care much about that. “What's your name?” he asked, watching as the guy looked up at him a little anxiously. “Oh, my name is Min-su…”

Even his name sounds pathetic, Nam-gyu thought to himself and couldn't stop himself from voicing his dissatisfaction. “This guy honestly gives me mad loser vibes, dude…” he complained, but Thanos paid him no mind as he walked towards the member. “Nah, this is perfect - we're the perfect team! Right Nim-su?” he asked the little guy while hugging him more tightly from the side and laughing when he saw his shy reaction. “I like you, you're cute.”

Seeing the two of them together was a really weird view, you honestly felt sorry for Min-su. “I'm sorry about that…” you whispered a little awkwardly to player 380 but she just patted you on the shoulder reassuringly. “Don't worry, how those two behave is not your responsibility. I suppose we're in this thing together now.” she laughed, not sure exactly what to make of this all herself.

You smiled at her before your eyes went to the watch on the wall which showed that you all only had half a minute left before the next game would start. “I mean, I guess so…”

taglist:

@innies-goth-gf @so-dramatic1 @fiicalapsiholoaga @h3artz4soph @luhvaryan @blackcatl0ver @hollxe1 @vixionix @barrythestrawberry041 @hashekyu @daphne00daiz @jayyzki @nikoeatschemicals @noharaaa @llynx7 @diaryofapsycho @nosla65 @tsuniio @gaabyzz @nejilost @homeless-clown @fr3akyyg1rll @ametheslime @chrypir @dior-heartsforever17

[daisymbin]

48. "you’re the best part of my day."

seungcheol comes home after a long day at practice and gets to “turn off his brain” when he’s with y/n, allowing himself to be loved and doted on instead of feeling like he’s in leader mode all the time

this is so wholesome 🥺

request your own: full prompt list!

check out my masterlist! // cheol's m.list

fluff prompt #48: "you're the best part of my day."

the front door clicks shut, and you hear the familiar sound of seungcheol’s sneakers being kicked off in the hallway. you glance up from the couch, tucking your legs under you as he steps into the living room, shoulders slumped and face drawn with exhaustion.

“long day?” you ask softly, already setting down the book you weren’t really reading.

he nods, his movements slow as he drops his bag to the floor and shrugs off his jacket. “yeah,” he mumbles, running a hand through his hair. “felt like it was never going to end.”

you stand and cross the room, wrapping your arms around his waist without a word. his body melts into yours instantly, his chin resting on your shoulder as he exhales a deep, shaky breath.

“i’m glad you’re home,” you murmur, your fingers tracing soothing circles on his back.

“me too,” he whispers, his voice muffled against your hair.

you pull back just enough to look at him, brushing a few stray strands of hair from his forehead. “come on, let’s get you comfortable,” you say, taking his hand and leading him to the couch.

he follows without protest, flopping down with a heavy sigh. you grab the blanket draped over the armrest and tuck it around him, earning a soft smile as he leans back into the cushions.

“want me to get you something to drink?” you offer.

he shakes his head, reaching out to grab your wrist before you can step away. “just stay here,” he says quietly, tugging you down to sit beside him.

you oblige, settling in close as he pulls you under the blanket with him. his arm wraps around your shoulders, and you rest your head against his chest, listening to the steady rhythm of his heartbeat.

“what happened today?” you ask gently, your fingers playing with the edge of the blanket.

he groans, tilting his head back against the couch. “practice ran late, and there’s just... so much to do. schedules, performances, making sure everyone’s okay. sometimes it feels like there’s no room to breathe.”

“you’re always looking out for everyone else,” you say, your voice soft but firm. “when was the last time you looked out for yourself?”

he lets out a dry laugh, but it lacks humor. “hard to do that when there’s so much on my plate.”

you sit up slightly, turning to face him. “cheol, you don’t have to carry everything on your own. you know that, right?”

his eyes meet yours, and for a moment, the weight he’s been carrying is plain to see. “it’s hard not to,” he admits, his voice barely above a whisper. “i’m supposed to be the leader. if i don’t have it together, who will?”

“you don’t always have to have it together,” you tell him, reaching up to cup his face. “it’s okay to lean on the people who love you.”

his lips curve into a small, grateful smile, and he leans into your touch, closing his eyes for a moment. “you always know what to say,” he murmurs.

“someone’s gotta take care of you,” you tease lightly, brushing your thumb across his cheek.

he chuckles, the sound soft and genuine, and pulls you closer until your head is back on his chest. “you know,” he says after a beat of silence, “you’re the best part of my day.”

your breath catches at his words, warmth blooming in your chest. “yeah?” you ask, your voice barely above a whisper.

“yeah,” he says, his tone soft but certain. “no matter how stressful things get, knowing i get to come home to you... it makes everything worth it.”

you don’t know what to say, your heart too full for words. instead, you tighten your arms around him, holding him close as if to say, i’m here. i always will be.

his fingers trace absent patterns on your arm, his breathing growing slower and steadier. “you make it so easy to just... be,” he says, his voice laced with gratitude. “when i’m with you, i don’t have to think about anything else. i can just... turn it all off for a while.”

“that’s the idea,” you say, a small smile tugging at your lips.

“i don’t know what i’d do without you,” he murmurs, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

“lucky for you,” you say, your voice teasing but warm, “you don’t have to find out.”

he laughs, the sound vibrating through his chest. “thank god for that.”

you stay like that for a while, the world outside fading away as you sit wrapped in each other’s warmth. for now, there’s no stress, no deadlines, no expectations—just the quiet comfort of being together.

and for both of you, that’s enough.

[unholywriters]

Bright Looks, Dark Mind

╰┈➤ Summary: He could never hurt a fly, choi San, the one who was always there when you needed him and would always find time to make sure you felt included or safe whenever he wasn't around, but he can't possible be a killer in the mafia right? Let alone the Heir to one?

╰┈➤ Pairings: Mafia San x Male Reader

╰┈➤Genre: Smut, Non-Idol Au, Mafia Au

╰┈➤ Trope info: San always knew what his life was going to, and tried not to get into outside of his circle out of protection but he couldn't help it when it came to you, but of course nothing goes plan.

╰┈➤ WC: 18.6k

╰┈➤ Networks: @cromernet @illusionnet @othersideoutlawsnetwork

╰┈➤Warnings: MDNI

╰┈➤ Ratings: 18+

╰┈➤ Taglist: @sweetinsaniiity

New World university, a place that was tricky to enter because of the long and complicated standards coming from the higher ups in the school. Your Grades not only had to be on top, but your attitude had to be clean, if you were going to be hasty you can't let it show, if you were going to be known as an enemy you had to plan things out perfectly with little of any fails. One wrong move could cost you everything. The pressure from the teachers was tense, even the best teachers had some of the hardest courses, leaving you to take notes on what was you to decide what was important to remember and what wasn't worth remembering. Another reason the books were free and if you bought one that was new, you got to keep it and do as you pleased with it, as long as you got to pass the class is all that matters.

There was one student here who seemed to never falter under the stress unlike most kids who got into here because of their parents. Choi San, known to be the top student in his classes and gym activities, offering study groups for those who were too worried to fail, but never letting them just copy his notes without fully understanding since he also made his notes impossible to fully cheat off of. He was kind, but knew what strings to pull so everyone would either listen, or leave him alone if he so wished to. His uniform always seemed brand new, not a single wrinkle or speck of dust. The cufflinks always shinning and looking polished with his pants never looking a mess, each step ringing felt like a bell for the other students to either flock around him, asking for tips and if he was busy, or if they should move out of the way and allow him to keep walking. Especially if he was in a hurry and needed to get somewhere.

His smile always either always attracted people, or made them look away. it always depended on his eyes, if they felt soft and welcoming, or if they were full of hostile, something rarely anyone ever got unless they truly were crossing a boundary, or they were involved with him outside of school. After all this was his also year, the stresses weren't as ever since he knew he was on track to graduate and would inherit things from his father as promised, given his grades and the appearance he kept up in school and could handle his father's business with little trouble despite how much time he would spend reading books and practicing other things. But today was different for him. It was a weekend, and he got asked about showing a new student around without the pressure of the other students. Which was something he agreed to, knowing the other kids could make someone's new day a problem, but it is strange to him.

They were coming at the last semester, where things get more busy between classes, test, and group activities would get more stressful to prepare for another end of the year celebration, especially for those who were graduation so it would be something they would truly enjoy and remember for years to come. Could have not have waited till next year? Or were they a transfer student? He didn't know that he arrived to the office. Slowly opening the doors to see the headmaster standing in front of a male, in the male uniform, his pack back with his scheduled in his hands, locking eyes with san as he walked in, letting the doors close behind him as he bowed softly. Standing up to show his friendly smile while walking closer.

“There he is, San this is y/n. A transfer student who did so well at their last school they were sent here to finish out the year. Can you help them find their classes and catch up on most of the lessons? I know there isn't any projects going on since those would take too long to grade.” “Why of course, it's a pleasure to meet you, y/n.”

The two bowed to each other, San standing up and being the guide and being as friendly as he usually is with the other students. Depending on the students and how they are. The lockers were something barely anyone used, and he didn't to waste their time.

“No one uses their lockers here either?”

“Depends if they have dance classes and such, since that would be a lot to carry around, is there any classes you would need this for? Though the dance class is more full and it would be hard to keep up. They take these last three months too seriously and have no room for error. Not to mention the classes have a lot of work stacked up just to make sure you can attend the graduation. They take it very serious. May I see your classes?”

Looking at the classes, San was a bit surprised to see all the classes. Even the music class, but decided not to ponder on it too much, knowing that it would give off the wrong impression for when school actually starts.

San spent most of the day waking through the halls and answering questions, his friendly smile never faltering as he kept walking, now having to go upstairs to another part of the building to the literature wing. Where the library also was and took up most of the hall since the books here were a lot to take in. Some being years old and there in attempts to keep them from fading away into nothing, more books or kids to feel more at ease and those in other languages so the kids can better their practice's and get things done at the rate they're wanting. Along with a small place to sit with drinks and rest some.

“The library is everyone's favorite place to come because of the coffee spot inside, everything is free of course. There are just some books you are only allowed to look at since they are old and crumble.”

Turning around, thinking y/n was still behind him, he was shocked to see that were looking inside of the classes. The large stair style of seats leading up and around to the center of the room. The rooms always looked bland, but inside it was always filled with tension some must keep under to keep focused on their glasses.

Shows always made places like this seem terrifying, especially for those who are new and don’t come for wealthy families. Often getting dragged into things they didn’t want to. But of course it was more than that, but y/n was determined. They got here from hard work, not doubting themselves and ready to crumble at the sigh of someone wealth just to bring them down.

“You know, some teachers are supposed to leave their classes locked on the weekend since some kids try to cheat in these classes. Surprised this one was open, I wonder if someone is here and hiding.”

Looking at the doorway, there was San leaning against the opened doorframe, his hands slowly seeping int his pockets with a curious look on his face as he looked around the room to see if anyone was there, the desk would show someone hiding since they have room for you to move your legs and set things under. Sometimes their bags sounding like bombs hitting the floor while they sat in the chairs and started to take notes of things for the day.

“It was just opened. I only saw rooms like these from movies and shows where the poor kid is out of place, but proven to have their spot here. Never thought I’d get the chance to be here myself.”

They admitted, looking at the large white board with a projector being close, but it was off to let the dim lights from the outside windows shine bright inside. It was a cloudy day so things felt more grey, but it felt more relaxed in the empty room. The shelves around the desk having books that seemed to never leave after years, only being pulled as props to use for things. Some of these books even had note markers sticking out against the hard rich wood. The tiles allowing more echoes to be heard with each footsteps, the two of them being alone in a large room. This gave San time to study them more before asking questions. The way they walked, talked, carried themselves with all the things in their hands and shoulders. He wanted to see if they were easy to crack with the pressure here. Would they truly make it out of here? Would they truly make it even a week in a place where you will always be in the light regardless of how quiet you are?

It was something that made him curious, but asking too many questions gets boring. Wanting to find out things from clues and see if he should add you to his social circle. A place where many people try to get into but almost never get in, the last person got in because they were always close with someone else who came to the school, but San wanted to make sure it would be a smart Idea to add them and not just to do as a favor. It was rare someone ever got that from him, let alone just because and if he felt like he was in a truly good mood despite this place feeling like t was crushing your sound each day you walked inside.

“Poor kid coming in the ranks of the Rich kids? Don’t those always ended up with the new kid being paired with the boy everyone is fawning over?”

He teased, watching y/n turn around and begun scanning his face once again but it was hard to. It was like they had practice how to make their face hard to read without giving it away that you were staring and trying to look, something San never wanted people to see because it would make them change. He wanted to see people in their raw colors.

It would be easier to make them crumble an even stumble on their words, he always enjoyed watching people squirm under him while he had a smile on his face the entire time. Those who saw the darkness in the smile would leave and try to keep their distance from him, but those who were still oblivious to his actions would never believe someone until it happened to them, being too late and their social status among the school would be ruined, nearly impossible to get back since San knew how to make you show how foolish you are while he stood in the back, his arms in his pocket and his innocent smiling hiding with the look in his closed eyes. With the dark expression only showing once he stopped smiling and just stared at you. He wondered, would he have to do so with you? It would be easy since no one would stand up for you if given the hard choice to. Those who would, would get cast out from the others with only you and whoever there to support you, depending on how fast you climb these deadly ladders.

“They do, it annoys me sometimes. They made you feel sorry for the poor kid despite their hard work. Why make the new kid go after someone who clearly has more control over the school and risk yourself? It’s a shark tank in places like these. And I have a feeling you’re hungry looking for food.”

The comeback made San show his curiosity, his eyebrow raised high and his mouth slightly curved into a smirk while Y/n got closer, walking past him and back into the hallway, taking in his new surroundings like the read the numbers of each class, not caring if San was trailing behind him. He wanted to come and do this alone, just to plan out places he would go into his classes. Each classroom was a battlefield, the front of the class was more for the note takers, those who were ready to answer things head on without fear, the back was for those who didn’t really want to pay attention but they were also under more watch, depending on where you sit in the middle, you are always pulled into something, and where the gaze of the teacher lands on the most. Sometimes feeling like you’re in the class's front sometimes. If you aren’t careful where you sit, things could either go well in your hand, or it could go against.

Depending on the subject, it can either be a safe place or another place where lies are thrown around in order to throw someone off just to get through the day and act like nothing else is wrong.

“Your last class is down here, extra classes are always last as a reliever.”

“That sounds like something you’d tell anyone to see if they would trust you or try to cling to you as a shield if they shared the same classes with you so you have something to do. Headmaster Lee was very vocal about his views of you and how sad he will be when you graduate because it has now raised his standards for the next person.”

Each word was planned carefully before being told out loud, this was just an introduction to the battlefield of the new school. Trusting someone so soon, giving in because of how they looked was a death wish and you would be left to dry in the sun till you were dried up with nothing left. 2 months doesn’t feel so fast during the day where it feels like there is no end to it. Mainly if the place feels like it’s doing nothing but taking your soul and leaving you with nothing with a smile on its face while you struggle to reach the light you had clung to.

San had a smirk on his face, locking eyes with y/n before they descended the stairs, walking through a large corridor, each side having floor and ceiling lengths windows to show the gardens and outside places to sit and eat. These places were for show, a place where you would be watched and judge for the things you did in such open spaces where people could see you and judging you from the inside, knowing you couldn’t hear what they were saying unless they wanted to. These places were a no-go, people would pester you about why were you there and wanted to know what you were hiding, but if they couldn’t find you, there was no point on starting a rumor because it could always be proven false and that would damage your reputation, losing those some had tried to hard to get close to only to sit there and prove themselves.

“Took notes from the shows and movies you watched I see. Wish some kids here took those shows into thought but it’s hard to do that when your worried about others things.”

“If you don’t live up to the part, your shark food. I have better things to do then play someone's game just because their bored with nothing better to do.”

Keeping their head up high, San walked past them to show them the music room, it was large as well. A place for someone to sing alone in booths, checking their pages, notes and such, somewhere for the choir to sing and those to practice and play their instruments for their own reasons. The walls were more lively with some lights and beanbags to help this place feel more relaxed, almost like they were trying to lure you in like a siren does before taking a bite. It was fitting since the choir here was named New World: Sirens. They would lure you in with their voices, movements, everything they could think of before tearing you apart and enjoying it like nothing else would happen to them. They were undefeated, and untouchable after all. No need to pull anything considered drastic, they had each other back and there was nothing anyone else could do. Even if they wanted to or if they weren’t considered being careful enough with their words and actions. But this was the main place San had control over, knowing if he wanted to sing to someone they would melt with such ease it would be like pouring water into a puddle, watching it expand and each ripple showing someone’s bright dreams becoming nothing more than a shell under his hands. And he wanted to see if they could live, after all they were already swimming so easily.

San watched as Y/n walked around the room, looking at each setup, everything was perfect. To the stands to the way some pencils were left with no dust or scratches on anything. The floor being cleaned enough to show your reflection and shine with the lights, the windows and doors being clean enough to see both inside and outside but the sound proofing making it hard for anyone to hear. The only doors that you couldn’t see through were the private booths for you to sit in and focus. But that doesn’t make them a place of interest. But, this was a place San held dear, he would make sure it was respected.

“I’m stepping into a landmine. This is your place, you got too excited walking do the door instead of telling me where to go.”

Turning around, the two locked eyes but San was more-so standing behind y/n, just waiting for them to turn around just so they could stare at each other while he leaned in closer, his head titling to the side like a curious cat who wanted to know what you would say or do in this situation but also kept his face confusing to read.

“No, this is our personal field, if we’re going off of the things you’ve said. But I like to call it a dance floor, we’ll dance till graduation, if I see you there.”

“Thanks for the doubts, that just makes it more to tango with you along with everyone else, clearly.”

San had led you back to the main entrance, the headmaster waiting so he could do the rest of his things with San there to help in case he had forgotten anything so far, thought it was highly unlikely. San lasses given your stance on most things, figured you could handle the new work and get things done and catch up. After all where is the fun if your given an advantage already?

Each quick step was like a snap of a finger. The seats were filling up quickly with students as they pulled out their notebooks for the first class of the day, math. San had made the choice of sitting next to you, his bag being heavy with his notebooks as he looked at your setup. Small and thin sticky notes that seemed to be labeled, the last pages seemed to be filled and nearly confusing, But you knew where everything was and that was all that mattered. Your pens were used for each class, Any form of blue was used for this class. San was scanning everything while being careful, knowing he shouldn’t speak as the professor walked in. Very little greetings since this class was always filled with information and missing it was fatal in any sense. The desk felt cold but soon it was be a test of listening carefully and if you could write fast enough, leaving things in while also asking questions.

“Where is the new student, I need to know if they need more notes before catching up?”

Opening the attendance book, the professor was scanning the class before seeing y/n raise his hands while already having writing things in the notebook, sitting somewhat in the front with san being next to him, His face content while everyone's else was now on the professor, some quickly gazing over to y/n just to see who the new kid was and if they should bother to ask, but with how fast the teacher was typing and getting ready to have the lessons taught, there was no time. If you wanted to talk, you were on your own for anything related to the class since people could always hear something different and needed time to let the information sink in before anything else.

“I’m caught up in this theory, if you want proof I have most of my old notes to scan to make sure and if anything is missing, I’d like to know.”

Ignoring all the stares, holding the book and walking down the steps to hand the professor his notebook, she was already holding her hand out before looking at the past notes, her eyes scanning each page that was flipped and filled with clean notes and marked. But what surprised everyone was when she was done and her gaze was looking at san, known to be her smartest student and was quick to have things solved like these were the easiest questions to solve.

“He’s a little ahead of you and given the grades at his last school, he’s tied with you, san. Back to your seat, you can talk about this outside of my classroom.”

Sitting back down, y/n gave a quick look seeing the curious look on his face with his trusted pen in his hands. A smirk nearly showing while he was curious before the lecture began, the professor writing and talking fast. One hand flipping pages in the textbook she was going off of with the questions while the other was writing on the whiteboard, explaining things before turning around with her finger pointed to someone in the class, this being how she would make kids answer questions and if they weren’t quick enough, they would feel the stares and pressure from others about being more careful next time for her. After all this was now the end of the year, things were only going to get more stressful before they got better. She would save san for last, but she wanted to see how y/n would answer the questions and how quickly. Every question was a test, each reaction being the answer.

“Y/N, does x equal a while number or a decimal, and if a decimal how many far back?”

“Decimal, 5.76824, rounding would make it 5.8 or would make it 6 if you didn’t want the decimal in the answers spot, professor.”

His head never leaving his notepad unless he heard his name, his hand moving quickly like he was cutting something and making sure nothing was wrong while trying to solve the question before getting called on, Knowing if he fell behind he would be ruined before the end of the day even got close, let alone lunch if San would continue to be a constant presence. Each word was like showing just how fast you will go, some would have two notebooks just so they could have one that's messy, with some points to get the messages across and then go back in their second one to make things look more organized and easier to read, since most of these test will always be no-note, unless the teacher wants to see who will do so, but it was almost always a test to see who was unsure of their answers, to see who will get more information from other students in order to get the answers they were searching for.

The professor knew this was going to be an interesting class, two smart students sitting next to each other, it wasn't a peace offering it was a tactic to see what they could learn from each other. Taking a piece from the other but making sure no one could figure that out. As long as the teacher didn't see a distraction it was fair game, get the work done, turn in the work at the end of the time and get ready for something more compact and makes you question more and more. It was a battle between the pair, each of them answering clearly but quickly and making sure they never stuttered. That would create an opening for teasing and the teacher wanting to make sure that you trusted your answer before choosing someone else, losing your advantage on the playfield.

What was worse was the class length, it was nearly 2 hours of pressure and nonstop writing with more notes flying around before the professor let out a loud clap. It made everyone look up and stop writing, some set down things and this must mean that it's time to stop. To relax some before the next class, maybe looking through notes and having conversations that seemed playful but were also holding more meaning, but making it hard for anyone else to try to listening without getting caught. If you were going to be interested, you had to play the cards right, whispers flew around the room, no one really getting ready but there thing different from the room.

Looking over, San was still staring, but it was more so like he was waiting for you to look in his direction, his eyes were hiding a message no one else could truly know. Was he curious about you? Did he want to throw more test your way just to make things more difficult? No, it would be pointless given the classes and his own life. He has things to collect from people, people to hunt down to get answers from and overall things to organize and show he can handle things himself. After all, he was born and raised in a life like this, how could he not have things figured out on his own with little help. Making sure he owed no one in the end and he had his debts and what not handled before anyone could hear about it and try to use it against him. Which was never a smart Idea, but he always seemed to enjoy it when to came to people, but that was always a question and saved for later.

There was no needs for words to be spoken, the two were just looking at each other, ignoring all the others before trying to come up with what words to say. Like starting a new game of chess. Debating on which piece to move first and how will one of each other try to figure this out for themselves.

“It's a shame you came in the last three months to graduate.”

He started, no one was truly listening, those who would, would've given it away that they were listening in on the conversation, it would then have to be switched around in order to keep people away. But what made San more curious was a slight smirk on his face, why were you smirking at him? Was he missing something more? But what could It be? It was hard to get san to miss anything unless it was true, someone slipped past him and he was just now realizing it.

“Telling you now would be a giveaway. And that would make things more complicated, hyung.”

After getting things packed away just before the bell had rang, Y/n slowly stood up from the chair. Fixing his dark red uniform since it had wrinkled some when sitting down and left the room. Leaving san there in a daze but also with a mission, it was clear you knew something he didn’t know. And that was something most teachers didn’t even have against him, so how was it possible that you had something on him? What did you know about yourself that he didn’t know?

It was pointless to ponder; he had classes to attend, battles to win and more pieces to move around in order to corner people and enjoy watching them squirm from under him. And clearly, he had to put more thoughts into you. Gathering his things and standing, he was quick to walk out and leave to his next class, knowing that you were going to the next one but the question is where would you sit? You were new, right? They always made new students sit close to the front, making sure you move quickly and without fail. But of course he couldn’t be too obvious, people would see that and slip in through his cracks, pulling at certain things and enjoying finally making the most terrifying person crumble. Something he would never let you see within the walls of the school. Then again, no one would ever get this chance and there was no room for you to get inside.

Walking to his next class, scanning the room to see you sitting right next to his seat yet again. His seat wasn’t in the front, it was in the back since this was a class he hated to answer in. Science was always more confusing, but he knew he was passing it simply because he took in all the notes he could, this was the class where kids would have extra notebooks just to make extra notes in more of a neater way, along with the library, making sure he got the right lesson and basically wrote things to make more notes and notecards just to quiz himself. But he was more glad he was about to be done with this class and not have to worry about it anymore. But he knew for appearance, he had to keep it up just to get through the classes. Walking to the lab table slowly, staring at you with question piling in his head, but it was pointless to ask now. What answers would he get?

In a place like this, ears were everywhere, wanting to pick up every little piece and make sure no stone was left unturned for this. Sitting down in his chair, he wanted to sigh, but he knew this class was full of seniors and it was more relaxed since everyone was already stressed as is, the last time this class went full on to make sure seniors could party the results were alarming and were damaging the school's reputation. So for those close to fully leaving, this was more known as a relaxation period. Which was surprising to y/n, a class like this for them? But there was no time to be asking questions no time to give in to something else but a time to prepare, next was history. And that class always focused on the darker side of history that some schools can't teach because of how graphic it can be. Which is why they also rarely have any projects since it would require research that would gain questions from parents and more peers outside, can't have that with a school like this. The funding would be cut, teachers would be less and the quality would disappear, something no one wanted to happen and would make sure nothing else would.

“I will say this again for the new student it seems. This class is used as a break period. We covered everything for the year and the district hasn't approved for a large project given the workload of the other classes. Unless you want to give the class something to do.”

Y/n was quick to shake their head, this classroom was already painful to truly learn everything. You needed to draw things, label them correctly so you would understand and remember them before having to actually write the notes down, drawing things already took so long if you wanted to get things to look right, leave the right labels and make sure the notes that were detailed enough to hold all the right information without fail or complicating things. Overall, this class would make someone wish it was never here, but of course some people needed it for their jobs and majors. San was here to show he can run things on his own without slipping, softly tugging on strings he had wrapped around his fingers before just tugging them in the right way he needed to. And that always made it fun for him, something he took joy in but would never show it unless his dad was around, but it made him wonder, what was y/n in here for?

What was their dream that they needed to get something from here in order to do so? He had such little time, yet so many questions. He felt himself looking over like it was out of habit, staring at yn as they were re-working on some notes to make sure things were making sense for him. After all once the last three weeks come to play, there will be nothing but test, and if he joins the music class seriously, singing till his that hurt since the final will be a duo. Two people having to agree on singing something and make sure they were singing fully with no mistakes, and if there were any, to make sure that no one knew they had messed up. But he wanted to wait till the last class in order to ask, knowing if he tried now people would try. And besides there would be booths no one could go into without permission and some areas made for small and private conversations. Since lunch here was still packed and busy, conversations would overlap with each other, some kids trying to stay silent in order to get more information about people or their classes.

How were you keeping Choi san, the dream student of the school with a twisted mind, now being curious about you?

San was pissed, something he was good at hiding but sometimes depending on the situation. But he could keep a bright and happy smile and appearance in front of everyone around him while he was walking to his classes, going through the motions since most of it was more so taking notes and with their English class, it was more so reading, taking notes since this test would be the second hardest compared to the math test they knew would take the longest time. Now back to why he was pissed on the inside. He couldn't find you when it was lunchtime, he looked in some of the most obvious places and some places that most kids couldn't find out. But you were gone, only to reappear in the last class of the day, you looked more refreshed, relaxed and ready to finish the day off singing. When he walked in he saw you talking with the professor, your eyes filled with excitement, like you just returned to an old place of ours.

He stared at you while being the last one to close the class door, he usually would talk to the professor about what song to sing with someone or if he would have to do by himself, pushing himself to make sure he could cover two parts into one to fit within his registry. But the professor looked over and motioned him over, he was quick to move over with his bag on both shoulders, since the bag was heavy with books, supplies and sometimes some other things for this class. Here, he would bring his tablet in order to find songs to sing and focus on his pitch to make sure things were in tune.

“I was hoping you would be here soon, I'm sure you've yn, do you remember them from freshman year? You two were so close!”

San looked visibly shocked at the teacher, his eyes widening some while he looked at the two of them, his face showing confusion as he tried to scan his mind to see if it was true. It would explain why you seemed to know your way around the school, but if that were the case wouldn’t the headmaster have said something? Or were they just waiting to see if he would figure it out on his own? But this was a class free from the war zones of outside. After all, music brings people together and shouldn't be sued to tear people down like paper being cut with scissors in a quick or painful manner. Maybe therefore he felt himself being curious, you looked and sounded familiar, but times had changed in those years you were gone, and things seemed to come back up to the surface, a fight not all are prepared to do.

“They went here in freshman year? It must've slipped my mind with all the studying I and homework, forgive me y/n, it didn't seem to click just yet for me.”

Bowing softly, his mind was racing once again, this would explain how you just vanished during lunch time, despite his other friend's finally being able to talk to him after classes, he wanted to bring you over just to see if you could handle the group, to see if the roughness of them and the teasing would break you or if you could handle it with these last three months, since they show off sometimes and they can wear their mask to well and pull stings as if they were keys on the piano, barely any pressure to watch you lose everything you've built up to this point. Yet here he was, staring at you while all the memories slowed pour back in, like a flood coining in after a door was opening, well not entirely in that manner but it was enough to keep him distracted some. But he had to keep himself together, even though this was the last class that doesn't mean the adults outside will have the calm stance they have now till they all truly leave the school.

“Well, I brought this up because I knew you were still looking for a partner before the final comes up. I think pairing you two would work, y/n says since they had to leave before the 2nd year, they would still practice their singing. I think it would create something no one has yet to see.”

The two looked at each other. San remembering how he would hear you singing during lunch, you'd leave the door slightly cracked to hear if someone was coming inside and if you needed to stay quiet so they could leave or listen to secrets. Coming to him the next day as a friend with more tea because you wanted to stay with him and his friend group because you loved talking with them during lunch. Everyone would share their food and drinks at their special spot so no one would try to butt in on conversations where they weren't welcomed. How San and the others would always try to sit next to you and would be known as the smart group.

People always tried to have study groups with any of you just to get the best notes, the best scores and overall answers they needed when the teacher would leave and say they could give out things, or if the teacher would even have the share notes for students to compare and get things done. San was sad when he heard you had to leave when summer was over, he wanted to help you. Offer money in case your family was struggling or even offer you a place to stay with him, but you took it as a chance to explore.

To see things outside and maybe they would come back. San was so hopefully that you would've come back to him, he wanted to catch up with you, to see how things were and get the others to be with you so everyone could sit down again. All these memories made him smile, a genuine and rare smile almost no one outside of his friends ever got to see since most of the time his smile would always have something dark. But now he was standing here, he had secrets he couldn't offer to tell you, more blood on his hands than you could wash off with acid. Seeing you smile, like you were waiting for this moment since you had limited time and dragging it out was pointless. But what made him question more was why did you have to come back on a scholarship.

Your parents were wealthy they could send you here and pay for each semester like it was pocket change. But suddenly you had to leave, he wondered what was your family situation, but you two were no longer that close, the two of you had grown in that time frame and there are things that will slowly come to the surface, but he wanted to see your reaction to the man behind that smile. Who would gladly bite you till you stopped fighting him.

“Thank you professor, I think we can make that work. Can we use one of the private rooms?”

Seeing the pure joy on his face, the professor allowed the two of you to walk to a room. Knowing nothing would happen since the glass would show, even though pixelated, it was still easy to see if someone was doing something they shouldn't be doing. The room had red soft walls with a wooden carving to show a floating couch, with some stands, music equipment, chargers and everything they could have needed. Y/n looking around before being pulled into a warm hug, San gave it without thinking, his shoulders seemed to wrap around you like he was protecting you from something but he just wanted to keep you close. Being startled some, but you slowly hugged him back, this was still the same San that would run after you at lunch to give you a hug because he couldn't do so during the morning. This hug was tighter than the other but you still had room to breathe, which was something he always wanted to do the day you left, the night he didn't get to call you because you told him calling would be weird, you were in a new place and everything, your text were rare to the point either of you got to text each other because of the differences. And now here you were, standing in front of him and got your way back here, he remembered your promise before leaving.

“You Really kept your promise to graduate here? Why did you even have to leave if you were so attached to it? I would've gladly got you a place settled so you could’ve stayed closer to us!”

Pulling away and looking down at your smiling face, like you just caught him being excited over a joke or something he truly liked. His voice carrying it while you held onto his arms, balancing yourself since after all, he wasn't that small boy anymore who could barely hug you without looking small; he was larger now. He had grown up and became someone that was almost hard to recognize until you spent more classes with him, it slowly clicked for the both of you.

“Money problems is all, and extended family but I planned on keeping my promise. I didn't want to just be handed things, you know?”

Your tone made him worry, but he kept his mask on. You sounded like you didn't want top fully say the truth, which hurt because he missed you and wanted to know why his best friend had to actually leave. He wanted to ask you, to keep pressing till he got the answers but that would expose you to things he wasn't ready to show you. After all you still had the others to meet again, to hear the excited screams, the hugs, the questions, the meetups. You had everything to get used to, and no was not an option, even if they had to meet you at your place, unless you could score the dorm, those were always the hardest to get into because of what they truly were, they were like apartment with the size and everything, but it would still feel cozy.

“Oh, you have to walk with me to see the others. Wooyoung would point you out quicker than seonghwa-hyung would! Please?”

“Have I ever been able to say no too you? Without a pout of all things?”

San gave you a pout, just to show that despite everything it still reminded the same before he got excited once again, Wooyoung would wait for him by the hallway just to walk with him telling him things from his classes before everyone would meet up and go to San's new house, where they would all get all of their homework done, play games and such before they all had to head home, something san would dread because he enjoyed having his friends over but he also wanted to see the others reaction to you coming back.

But it was enough of that, you two had to figure out what this song was going to be, san going through some samples of tempos he had, wanting to see your honest opinion, not what you think he wanted to hear and he knew he would trust you with that. Your face would say it all before the words could come out of your mouth and be coated, he weaned the raw truth so he could improve and not be distracted into thinking they were good since you two would have to perform this in front of the school as a final, and the college was a large place despite everything, so it needed to outshine the others in some for.

He wanted to work on this more, but he knew wooyoung would barge in before he could get another thing in before he could save everything into his computer, something he was slowly doing with these last 10 minutes while talking to you, his smile showing brightly while hiding his eyes. But his dimples would show and it was honestly just the cutest sight for you to personally see ever.

“Be warned, wooyoung still loves to jump when he's excited so please be ready. He's not a small either.”

“Oh god that scares me for Jongho, did anyone else grow?”

“That's for you to find out.”

San laughed with pure joy as the two of you walked out of the class, being a bit late since san had got gotten up with talking with you and nearly forgetting his computer in the room with his bag. Keeping his hands in his pocket, he spotted wooyoung before you did, seeing him push back his curly black hair with his eyes looking around for him, his lip piercing shinning in the light as he smiled at san, getting ready to run till he saw San pull you in front of him. At first wooyoung slowed down some till he saw that smile, he knew that smile anywhere and it made him gasp before taking off. San staying there to act as a boulder as Wooyoung picked you up, squealing despite people looking over as he hugged you tightly. His smile wide and forgetting that the two of you were still carrying bags with books too heavy, yet he picked you up like it was nothing.

“oH MY GOD SANNIE! WHEN DID YN-INNIE GET HERE?”

“They just got back here today. I almost didn't notice! Can you believe that?”

Wooyoung was so happy he was still jumping at the sound of your laughter before setting you down, scanning you over with his hands in a tight grip.

“Oh, my god you still look the same! Quick quick we've got to go Seonghwa is going to be so happy to see you he might let no one else hug you!”

Wooyoung grabbed both of your hands and ran to the front entrance. Since most of the students were gone given their classes and such, making it through with ease and not bumping into people till he saw Yeosang standing by the door, looking confused why Wooyoung was dragging san with someone else. The person seeming to struggle as wooyoung got closer, seeing Yeosang slowly blink while fixing his tie. His hair was a mess because he usually had gym last, getting a nice run and workout in with jongho, who would usually leave early since his car was known to be the biggest despite one of the older ones wanting to drive most of the time.

“Yeosang! It's Y/N! Look at him!”

“Good lord you're arms have gotten bigger what did you do-"

After looking at you for a while, listening to your tone that's when Yeosang smiled before hugging you, San stood there in the back a little, watching him hug you the same way he did. He knew yeosang missed you, everyone did, but there was something burning inside him as he watched you smile at them, it wasn't jealousy, why would he be jealous at the person his friends adored more than anything here? Maybe it was because he wasn't sure if this was real or not. Maybe he wanted to see if he was dreaming and when he opened the door to see the others, he would wake up in his room and want to throw things, but why did this not feel like a dream?

You were catching up with the others while you walked outside; he saw the shocked look on your face when you saw Min-gi and Yunho. They had grown taller, towering over everyone just by standing but the two had a name that you used to call them, since everyone called them twin towers you would call them the tall duo, a name they only got used to you calling them and when they hear it. They were more than happy to see you. They particularly picked you up off the ground when they got close to you, their cheered of excitement after years of no longer seeing you or hearing you call their names burning something inside of them. They were happy to see you while The parents of the group came over, hongjoong being the first to hug you before seonghwa practically picked you up like a mother happy to see their kid after so long.

You guys would joke that seonghwa was your adoptive mother, but he never denied the claim since it was just how he watched with the others and san was right. It really took a while before he fully let you go. Looking around at everyone with wide eyes as if he couldn't believe you were actually there in his arms but he knew jongho was excited when he finally got close enough, knowing there was only one person who would be held like that in the group, he stilled looked the small but it was clear he had more muscles to him just like san did, if not all the others. Despite the uniforms being tight they all still gave you a hug like nothing was stopping them.

Hongjoong however, stayed back towards san, seeing his gaze never leaving you despite how you were trying to answer questions without giving too much away. He still had to know, why did you have to leave in the first place? Why didn't you take his offer to grow with the and learn of him sooner? Now he had to show you things he didn't think you would like as of now. But it wasn't like he was losing you again. He lost you once already, how was he supposed to lose you again and simply be fine with it?

“Your staring too deep at him, san.”

Hearing hongjoong's voice brought him back, his eyes slowly claiming down as he shifted his attention to hongjoong, looking down to meet his gaze while standing still, blocking out the noises. Hongjoong had the look of he wanted to talk, but they had to stay quiet, although it was easy because everyone was trying to ask questions while making sure you weren't hurt during their excitement runs and hugs.

“They vanished after the last day of summer, came back on a scholarship and seemed to just…blend back in like nothing happened. I'm happy he's back, I truly am but.”

“You want answers why they left. You missed them the most, you'd stare at old pictures to the point if you didn't you'd lose your mind. And clearly, their hiding something.”

“Maybe their family was running low on money?”

“Think san. You knew everyone's parents and their struggles, there was one pair of parents you hated because they acted high and mighty as if they never had children. And you taught them a lesson like your Appa told you to.”

San's face fell for a moment, but it came back with something dark in his eyes. Something hongjoong knew not even he could protect you from or the others could. He knew exactly how to get you to stay this time, by his side and nowhere else.

Despite his efforts to try to get you to stay with him tonight, San truly didn’t want you walking by yourself. He had to see where you lived since it was clear it wasn’t around here anymore, so what did he do? He let the driver take you, knowing there were camera's in the car and trackers to see where you were going. Knowing that during the last hug he gave you, where he almost didn't let you go, he kept one on you just so he could see and hear everything that was happening. Knowing he needed to be careful for your sake.

He got you to come to his house so everyone could catch up, like old times and the living room was actually filled with laughter again and not just plans of other things. For a moment, it felt like you never left till you did once again, but this time he got to watch you leave. He got to see you sitting in the car, staring out the window before having to stop in front of apartment buildings that looked unsettling to say the least. San was watching you, in his own darkroom with a cup of water in his hands, it looked like it was moments away from breaking but he tried not to, knowing he would've had to be explained to his dad why his hand was bleeding because of the glass.

He watched you walk inside the place your parents sounding tired, but they were happy to see you were okay, but you didn't tell the where you went, something San picked up because you would even call them in front of his parents so they knew where you were, but you didn't even do that unless he wasn't paying attention. You greeted them, helped them with some things like dishes, getting the laundry from the basement and looking for jobs,

So hongjoong was right, he made your parents pay their actions years ago, but he never knew you were their son. If he did, he would’ve made a deal much earlier, I mean he could always do that now, but he wanted to do so when you were finished with school, knowing he could show you things slowly at a time, planning everything while knowing he now had to see you outside of school. He sat there in his room, messing with drink slightly while sitting back in his chair, knowing he had a phone call to make but it would always come later, he enjoyed using a voice changer to mess with those who crossed him because who would believe that a college student about to graduate at the top of his classes, would do things in such a nature?

Nearly no one if they saw him outside, but those who saw past the act knew better and sometimes they wouldn't be able to tell others of what they had to witness or they would be silenced as well. But he wanted to see your reaction, not now. He watched you take off the uniform and hang it on the closet door, your room looking so cramp but you made it your own with what you could. The way it was set up he could watch you sleep while tuning out the other noises around him, something he was thankful for because he truly wanted to focus on you.

He heard you shower, knowing he would never look there and never wanted to, if he would look he wanted to see if for himself. And that would come with time, of course, knowing he had a couple strings to pull beforehand. But for now, he was just watching you rest, the way your face relaxed while holding onto a blanket, he remembered that one. He gave it to you as a joke one day because you were freezing when everyone went to an outside movie and sat in the car, turning it off so the gasses wouldn't make people cough and he held you under it. He watched you fall asleep. He wanted to go there and sleep next to you, but he knew better. The place you now had to live in was somewhere he owned, where he would send people to be watched and struggle to climb back up to the ladder.

He wanted to give you a way out, but that would give you an illusion that would be shattered quickly with one stare. How would he even explain he knows your situation? He watched you; you were tossing and turning like you were trying to keep bad memories away; he was listening for footsteps to see if anyone was coming and if they were, he would have a building manger come in and remove the person. Even if you screamed for it, there was nothing anyone could do to stop him. He wondered, what were you thinking of in a situation like this? What were you thinking of after all these years, it felt longer than it truly was?

Staring at his screen, his mind was racing with thoughts and questions but they were cut short when he felt someone's hand on his shoulder. It made him jump in his chair, thinking all of his friends had left but Hongjoong stayed back. He had a look in his eyes that was a mix of darkness but comfort. This meant they had a job to do, another test San had grown used to doing after everything was done, since this would be the nights he would have in case someone were to push his buttons.

“I had a talk with your parents, San.”

“Is about another partner since the last one didn't stick for long. I warned them she was bluffing.”

Hongjoong had a smirk on his face while sitting down, pulling up a spare chair with his legs crossed. Even though he was still in his school uniform, knowing he would have a hard day tomorrow since it was just the middle of the week, there were still things that needed to be figured out and such but also long nights that had to be settled before they leaked into the next day or longer than needed to be. San was used to having to be up a little later and waking up earlier, sometimes during lunch or in his second class and use it for a nap. Feeling better till lunch got there and he could now fully keep up and make sure he had things ready for the others classes for the day. Some days were easier than the others, but his music class was a daily thing.

It was a joy he had and would sometimes go to that room on the weekends when he was free before having to go back to his other work, knowing that was being taken on more dangerous and involved missions that would make him learn more about his choices and how to wear the sheep skin so well not even other sheep could tell he was a wolf. Something he enjoyed doing, but the one who could truly pull more strings was Hongjoong, he was in this world before his parents even dipped their toes into it. Knowing if he wanted to do things without the threat of money, he got into and build things up from scratch, working with San's father to make sure he would have a team he could rely on, and so he created one with his own hands and enjoyed watching it grow more and more than the days went on, turning two weeks, months and now years each time he thinks about.

Hongjoong was always known for the way he can smirk, a face full sunshine before seeing the smirk that could show just a peak of darkness that was brewing inside of him, sometimes people would be surprised at the things he says, sometimes questioning why he would say such things but he would just find ways to denture the conversation and acting like nothing had ever happened. It was something he honed till now.

“Your dad saw the look on your face when he heard that name. He looked at you thinking you had moved on, but given the questions you were trying to ask, he knew you were going for them, and that you might start adopting children, since you always wanted to have a family of your own.”

“Either adopting or a surrogate, either way, though adoption sounds better. I don't want someone trying to claim my children at the end of the term saying they grew attached. Then things would get more complicated.”

“Unless you made it clear where they stood, some always need that terrifying push to see you're serious about it. But that is a talk between the two of you, my question for you is, how do you plan on keeping them here. Scouters will come for that final and offer deals, some are always out of state, if y/n picks one out of there, since if they picked one here, you'd been able to pull more strings even if they went on tours.”

San looked at the screen one more time, seeing you resting on your bed as comfortable as you could get before turning back to Hongjoong. He had a planning look, and hongjoong knew what it truly meant, he was planning things and he was going to make it work, no matter how hard you would fight to get away from him.

Unknown Number: You know, trying to hide in the classrooms, or even behind your little knight in shinning armor won’t always save you. Even the brightest people, have the darkest secrets. You should know better than that, y/n.

Y/N: You really must have nothing better to do. This is childish.

Unknown Number: [Image attachment]

Unknown Number: [image attachment]

Unknown number: You should focus now. You Can’t afford to fail now can you?

The text didn’t happen for almost a month; you had gotten used to being around san and the others again, keeping your housing situation a secret still while enjoying your time with them. Going to lunch and even having the study sessions again. Even sitting around and would sing with each other and help make sure everything was good for the pair. Hongjoong being the most help with the sounds and production help and an outside opinion since sometimes you think it would sound good, but having help from someone who can tell the difference and the song you're going for, it easy to do.

“San, you need to let it sink a bit lower for this next part. So the emotion is there and carries through. Run it again from the last stop.”

San gave a thumbs up, he was wearing his favorite hoodie and sweats, his hands in his pockets with the headphones on his ears. Looking back over to you, smiling softly while you sat your phone down, wanting to forget the messages you’ve been receiving. Some classes were done with their finals, the only two that were more pressuring were math and singing. Math was soon, but you had to be confident in your answers and having someone who had your number, sending you picture of places you were at, even somewhere you were looking around and didn’t see anyone was a shocker.

Watching san and listening to him, it was clear he took time with it, his eyes were closed while he took in hongjoong's advice as carefully as he could. You had finished your sessions for the day, getting closer to the end of the song but trying to make sure everything else would tie in perfectly. It made you wonder could you tell them what was happening? Would that have changed anything if you did? You were told not to, along with an attachment of your parents sitting in the cramped living room, oblivious to someone taking pictures with cameras no one could find. You even looked with everything you had but couldn’t find anything and yet you still get pictures sent as a reminder. Whoever this person is, wherever they are, they’re always watching you, at first you thought it was one of the boys.

But the pictures you’re getting, how could it be one of them when in some pictures all of you are together. How could it be one of them if everyone is busy together and not even paying attention? But trying to think about it was pointless. You have better things to worry about, more things to stress about and eventually, leaving this place for getting out of the family drama you were being pulled into and force to live through. The facade your parents tried to live for so long was now ruined because they took a leap too early when they weren’t ready to take it. It was a mess, and you wanted to start over, singing is something that could get you out if you reached out far enough. Wanting to start all over but it was hard. What was gonna happen now?

Unknown Number: Sitting there zoning out about me will do nothing for you.

Unknown number: [attachment sent]

Unknown number: Getting out of state will be impossible for you, but you can keep trying though, you’ll meet him soon~

Each text was like a taunting shiver, as if the person was there just enjoying you squirm and shiver. Even now with the zoned out look on your face, San looked over and the mic was hiding the smirk on his face, knowing the messages were the reason you were having trouble looking focused and interested in anything that you were involved in. But he hid that smirk so well it was almost like nothing could happen to him, watching you look over your shoulder while trying to hurry to the next class, only to look at his phone and see the messages and wonder why was this happening? This school takes things like this seriously and yet they haven’t been able to find the person who's behind these, making him question everyone around him, yet san was your safety net, like always. He’d do his best to distract you while getting you to laugh, his smile always wore off on you which would make it harder to even stay paranoid or even mad at something's. But sometimes you wondered, what happened when you left.

There’s no way he stayed the same, it was clear he didn’t and sometimes you wish the music teacher didn’t give you away so you could’ve learned more about him before being exposed, but you also weren’t sure if he actually had this class or he was being silly just to mess with you. But clearly things were happening, and the professor wanted to see what would happen with the two of you paired up, knowing it was to create more doors, unless she knew how San would act, regardless. Having you trapped in a corner with puppet strings and no matter how hard you were tugging, trying to get out there was nothing y/n could do to get free from him. Even with a careful tug, there was barely anything yn could do against this person, this force that wanted to mess with you. Maybe this was just a prank to get you on edge as the transfer for the last quarter. But either way it can’t break you, not this close to the finish line.

Slowly blinking, you see San giving you a concerning look while standing in front of you, kneeling down while holding your hands in a soft and caring embrace. This was taking a toll on you, he knew that just by how often you’d look nervous every time you grabbed your phone, looking at it before going the app or song you wanted to play as a distraction when you were alone. It was time for a break, after all you two were doing great and not everything had to be finished, but you two also needed to get ready for the final. Math was tomorrow, and it was going to be annoying, clearly this person would do nothing, after all when you had your finals you would get nothing in return, not till afterwards since hearing any phones would cause you to fail, something you couldn’t afford to lose today and took every precaution needed in order to do so.

“Here, let’s get you something to eat, I brought snacks just in case we stayed here too long.”

Not wanting to argue with him, the two of you sat down to eat, Hongjoong looking at the two of you through the reflection of the screens, watching San feed you like he used to, telling jokes whenever he could with that bright smile on his face. His eyes even smiling with him as he did so like he always used to. He always knew how to make you smile, leaving was hard, how could anyone else make you this happy by barely trying other than being himself? It was like each day he was getting to be closer and closer. He knew you wanted to explore, to leave and sing your heart out for those around you to enjoy while leaving this place behind. Who knows, maybe he could visit you and you two could keep talking like nothing was wrong even with different time zones. But there wasn't much he could do, and you knew it was making him sad.

You came back only to leave again? To follow your dreams and shine with him in the corner with the others, who knows maybe the two of you could have a collaborate one day and blow the charts and make it enjoyable. But that was forb the future in later days but the two of you had to build up the foundations before getting there. Hongjoong wrapping up the things for the day, knowing the song was done, you two had recorded things in the spare time and slowly got to put things together for the recording since most people would want to hear the actual recording compared to the two of you singing it live. He knew during that day; he didn’t have much time before the graduation party, which he was making sure you were attending since it was traditional and you two would talk about this for hours on end before anything else. He was curious about it since sometimes the theme would have you dressing up either in a fancy way or even a silly way if they liked your year enough, but this year it was just however you wanted to dress. If you wanted to dress fancy, it was completely fine for you to, but if not then you didn’t have to and it was fine.

“Here, I can walk you home or to the stop if you want me to. Hongjoong can send me the rest of the song and we can send it to the professor and focus on our math final, then after that maybe we can practice more?”

“Well, I don't have a suit for graduation, but I also can't afford one but don't want to show up out of place with the rest of you. I know seonghwa, even if he tries to wear down he will still show up looking great.”

“Then how about we just go do that and then we can figure out the rest of things later? I still have the keys and card so we can just look around and pick what you like?”

“Sounds like a plan to me, I know exactly what I want to wear, I think.”

San smiled at you, holding your hand while he walked to the door, turning back to hongjoong just for a second, wanting to make sure he was doing the right to think and he could see the look on hongjoong's face. He had that knowing look some of the hair falling in front of his face with a smile showing how dark it was. He knew San would have questions later at the end of this, but he also knew that San had to wait before checking on anything so he trusted his captain to make sure things were to his liking, along with wooyoung and yeosang since they would hang around him the most and wanted to make sure things were looking good enough before the big day, san still had to plan out everything before the big day and that day was making him so nervous because anything could happen and it would only make things harder for you, not for him it would just make things more annoying because he already had to make a speech. You hated the mafia; he learned that and since he was about to run it, you would hate him but he will take it.

“Where do you want to go for this? A lot of places around here are having sales going on so it would be pretty hard,”

“There is only once store I trust and if it's gone I'm letting seonghwa out stage me.”

He couldn't help the laugh that came out as he helped you inside of the car, the shop you loved was still there, genderless clothes were always something you and seonghwa had in common, wanting to wear clothes and feel like yourself without the pressure of others looking or making things weird just by stares but what was going to stop the two of you? Maybe San could match with the two of you But it was all up to him for how that would go, you would not make him match with you, if not that was fine, you were there to have fun after everything, not out stage anyone as a last push comes to shove.

The drive there was filled with singing other songs you would play on the speaker, seeing if San knew these or if you could surprise him with songs he hasn't heard before, which was hard in itself since he enjoyed listening to a lot of music when no one was paying attention or questioning him. So finding songs he didn't know was pretty tricky sometimes, and he knew how to look clueless before revealing that he knew the song, where he heard it from and how often he plays it. Reading it out like he was reading of a spreadsheet of information and telling you things you needed to know before making it off as completed. But he also had to pay attention to the road so trying to see your reactions were hard to do, that was until he came to a nice parking spot in front of the large and busy mall. It wasn't as busy as it usually would be, since the sun was setting and people wanted to get things done before the deadline, but you had that already handled and was more than happy to do this with help from San, knowingly he also would not let you pay even if you came up with the money somehow.

Even when he walked inside with you, it was natural for him to hold your hand while walking around, window shopping at some places or even getting some snacks, if people didn't know you two, they would think this is a date given how the two of you were acting. The look san would give you whenever you talked or point out things you liked, it was enough to make him fall even more, you could see it in his eyes but also know he would be respectful, but you didn't know just how dangerous it was. If there was one thing he would've told you beforehand, it would've been that you should've stayed hidden and out of his sight. The small and innocent puppy turned into something not even you could fully tame without getting bit a couple times in order to learn the lesson. Clearly he needed to speed up his lessons if he wanted you to learn faster before the final push.

Yet throughout the entire day he allowed you to lead him, holding his hand unless you went to the bathroom, he seemingly never left you go even when looking at clothes to try on. Letting you conclude on your own what you wanted to get and not be influenced by his idea since the person who was going to wear it the most was you, it didn't matter what he thought or anyone else for that matter. If you liked it, that5 is all that matters to him during the end of the day. He was just happy to tag along and watch you be happy about your choice, if you had everything you wanted he paid for it without a second thought or hesitation, he mainly just wanted to make sure you had everything before checkout so no one had to run to get you something at the last minute, especially if there was a line behind the two of you.

“Is this everything you want, y/n?”

He watched you nod your head while he held the bags, if there was one thing his mother always love to see and bag about sometimes it was that he raised a gentleman despite the chaos he was in. Watching him grow to give everyone respect, till they cross the line and then he acts like his father, but he's able to balance them out, but with all of this being said. He was determine to help you carry things inside, even though at first you were hesitate since your father was still jumpy, since he wanted you to leave the country before anything else could happen. But you needed help, so he offered and you took it, he didn't park close since he didn't want to set off any red flags and there were no spots close to bark, but he still carried everything even up the stairs since the elevator was down, but you were on the third floor so the stairs weren't really an issue for him either.

He watched you open the door and allow him inside; the place seemed quite like no one was there, but he looked to the corner, well more like behind the door into the small living room, he saw the look on your parents' faces; the shock growing as San locked eyes with your father, but he mouthed the words Don't. Say. A word. With a sweet yet sickening smile as he greeted the two of them, bowing deeply while helping you set the bags in your small room. It wasn't the best, but it was still yours.

“Maybe after everything you guys can pick me up last? So that way it's more of a surprise on the way to the hotel or wherever the thing is being held at?”

“I don't see why not, I heard it was going to be more relaxed this year but I'm no longer on the student council so I sadly can't spoil anything for you like I used to.”

“Please, with how excited you'd used to get? I would've known way beforehand. But thank you again for the help, are you sure I didn't spend too much? You refused to let me look at the price tags.”

“If you did, you would've tried to downgrade everything and besides it was fun going to the mall with you like that. I missed your long talks about things you loved or things you wanted to yes, it's truly fine. I want you to enjoy the last year just like the rest of us, it's only fair, isn't?”

There it was again, that charming look that seemed to get everyone on their knees and feel a soft spot grow inside of them. His smile looking so genuine and full of care, it just made the days easier if not better in most ways.

“I will leave you to studying, please make sure you actually eat something. If you can call me before you go to bed, please do.”

“Alright you big dog, I will and please drive safe, I'll see you when the final comes.”

San gave you one last hug, smiling softly as he did so before leaving your room, slowly closing the door out of habit but you also didn't seem to mind it. Once it was closed, he looked at your shocked father, like his hands were shaking despite the friendly look on san's face as he got closer, wanting to make sure you didn't ease drop on the conversation before he left the place for the night. He didn't get too close, but close enough to where they would hear his every word and make sure it all stuck with to them like super glue.

“Now now don't look at me so frighten like that, I'm not gonna hurt a tiny little hair on y/n's little head, unless I have no choice that is. But you should also be careful, after the annoying celebration things are going to be different, you'll either be tossed out of state or moved to an entirely far and different part of it, and y/n will be the star he oh so worked so hard to get, but he's not leaving me again. If I knew he was your son, I would've been so much more generous with my offer, but sadly, you are known for being a snake and lying till you're like this, stuck in a corner with so much fear it's laughable. You should chose your net actions carefully, I'm always watching and listening. If I even so much as hear you get angry at hi, try to send him anywhere out of here again, suddenly, he's an orphan married under my name, understand?”:

[Play the song above, ]

If math wasn't stressful enough, singing like this was because you two had to stare at each other. Al dressed up in clothes besides the ones you would wear tonight, but in a way that matched the song you were singing. Each word had to carry something, and you had to make the timing just right when switching between each other or having to collide with each voice in a melody that seemed to carry around the large auditorium, the lights shinning brightly down on the two of you while making it nearly impossible to see anyone else in the dark area; the chairs being filled with people since you also had to stay and watch the other perform, but you two were the last ones and everyone to stay and wait to see this.

Heard he got you a penthouse on the west side, when we will he learn that you're afraid of heights? I heard he got you a new Benz, with the white wheels, when will he learn, that you like to tandem bike?

And I hate that….

I could love you with my eyes closed kiss you with a blindfold figure you out.

I might hold you with my hands tied show you I'm the right guy to figure you out, na-na-na, na na.

San started the first part, his eyes were giving the look that screamed her was there for you, as if he had watched you run away to chase something only to realize almost too late that he was right there, next to you and holding onto you, his words carrying through the hand held mic while he stared into your eyes like he was just one more push from risking it all in front of everyone but he had to stay there, and he had to stay still and let you sing the next part by yourself, it was too early for backup vocals.

I heard he got you some new friends with some big dreams, when will he learn, that you already got your own?

Oh, I heard he got you the front raw, at the rap, when will he learn? That you like the rolling stones?

And I've been thinking of all the little things that you've been missing…When will you learn?

I could love with my eyes closed kiss you with blind fold figure you out [Figure you out}

I might hold you with my hands tied show you I'm the right guy to figure you out, na-na-na na na

San tried to make sure your eyes never left his, as if he was using this song to confess feeling he never got the chance to do so till now. Watching you sing while you two held each other's hand when he acted as the backup vocals during some of your lines with the chorus. But then he did something you two didn't talk about doing, but he was going with what felt right. To add more emotions and meaning into each lyric that he could with no one there to stop him from doing so, but he had to make sure it was equal so both of you were heard.

I could treat you so much better I've known you forever, figured you out.

For some, what made this more emotional and powerful was the sight of seeing San nearly got on his knees while singing. He stumbled closer, like his legs had given out while the two of you were singing still, this was raw. Something that no one could truly ever recreate unless that felt the same emotions he was going though when singing and it was something he wanted to share with you, he didn't care if others enjoyed seeing him get this way, he just wanted to share a moment with you, even when the music was dying out and you two just stared at each other for a while. The grip on each other was strong, but you two still had a smile that was growing, bowing to the ground in a way to show the thanks you had for each other while the lights slowly came back on. It was like stepping back into the old world and having to come to terms with the fact that now you had to talk and wait for recruiters to reach out to you. Along with a quick bathroom run because those lights were making it hot, and San's stare wasn't exactly helping with that it seemed. The way he stared at you, like he wanted to lean in and do something he otherwise wouldn't do with all the eyes looking at them, looking at you.

He watched you walk to the bathroom, seeing you bow to the crowd before running backstage, while he walked behind you. He didn't go in the bathroom but he stayed close, making sure his heart wasn't racing nearly as much before pulling out his phone. He got a text from Wooyoung; it was his signal, the purple heart. This meant that no out-of-state contracts could go through, and the only ones here were ones you already heard about, and depending on which one you picked, San would have his men handle the mangers, the team and have his own men or women in the staff just to make sure he always had an eye on you. No matter where you went, unless it was the bathroom, he would not be that crazy now, though he thought about it often.

He was quick to tuck his phone away, not wanting you to be peaking since you had a habit of just peaking over this shoulder when he was on the phone for too long. But he also knew to keep his contacts in separate phones and hidden under things you couldn't get into. He had everything planned out from the start to the end, but he of course had to look clueless, watching you be confused why no one else reached out to you and why it nearly seemed impossible for you. Even your parents, who used to support your dream of getting out seemed to look nervous about it, meaning it was too late and the people they wanted you about had come and made sure they couldn't leave, meaning you couldn't leave because they were watching the entire family, and there was nothing you could do about it.

When you finally came out the bathroom, you looked more relax, looking at him with a confused look, why was he waiting for you by the bathroom? Did he want to join with you or was it something else?

“want to join me with talking to people? I thought KQ seemed to look pretty interesting.”

“Yes I did, and let's go see what they have to offer.”

By the end of the day it was settled. KQ was the one, they were small, and you wanted to grow with a company, to watch them grow and shine and not just be another person in the company trying to grow like nothing happened. Though for san, it just made things more easy since he Knew the owner, all it took was one gaze and he knew better, you had to be taken care of or everyone would be in trouble if not. He didn't need to threaten anyone, or nearly cause a scandal, since they were slowly growing that wouldn't be a good thing for them now would it? But now came the most excited for him the party. Everyone was rushing to get home and get ready, he had a driver take you home since you knew he would speed home just so he could make sure he had everything right with his own looks.

He promised he would come and pick you up last so everyone could enjoy the car ride together, and he stayed true to his word. But it wasn't for that reason either, even now that he was home. He had phone calls to make, places to check and to make sure even things with his own father were ready. Tonight after graduation, San would have to go to a building, where other mafia members would sit on the sides and watch him be accepted into his new role, and you would have to be there where Wooyoung would explain things with hongjoong besides him, something he really wanted to do and enjoyed doing regardless of what would happen to him if he were to mess up, which is why he was called a wildcard. Some thought mingi would be the wild card because his actions were truly out of pocket and he always surprised people, but wooyoung could do more and make it stick in your mind.

“Wooyoung, are you sure everything is ready? You enjoy messing people up too far in the head.”

“Now are you doubting me? Captain will be there to keep me in check from messing them up too far, and will walk them down to you, of course. Don't get too nervous you're about to be the head of everything mafia related and people can't see the weak spot already.”

Looking in his mirror, staring right at Wooyoung who was already wearing what he wanted to wear, but he had a smirk on his face the entire time. He was excited, this was a big day and moment for san, he proved his worth to everyone who tried to tear him down and even used their backs as stepping stools to get there without mercy and was about to sit on a chair he knew he earned, not just because he was brined into the family but he showed more interested in it, if he wanted to leave he truly could and no one could do a thing to him. Yet here he is, about to rule over things and make sure there was nowhere you could run without him being able to hear you, but of course he would tease you about things while making sure you could handle things, creating a mask for the outside but being deadly in the inside.

Wooyoung was right, San couldn't be doubting himself during a moment like this That would be dangerous for him and there was no time for things like that. He had to finish getting ready, making sure he liked his hair while fixing the outfit more. Wooyoung couldn't help but smile at the sight, here he was seeing his best friend step into something he had been preparing for the day you left, he would’ve searched for you either way, even if you did manage to leave the state he wouldn't have given up. But now you just made it easier for him in that sense, but of course he needed to be careful of how to keep you here and to be careful with letting you try to slip through cracks before getting stuck in them, but either way, you'd return to his home and there would be nothing you could do about it.

Watching San walk out of the room, Wooyoung smiled. Tonight was the night everything would fall back into place, after today he would be known as the right hand, worked his way up from nothing into something and he was proud of it. Though part of him hoped you won't put up much of a fight, his makeup bag could only hide so much.

Think. You had to think and remember how did you get in this situation. You were with San, the two of you were walking with the others to go and find a place to relax after food was being served, you had just gotten your diploma’s and were now free. You could start training under KQ with the others as a surprise and grow with the company/ You were about to sit with San, you looked over to him and saw a look you'd never seen before, he had a smile on his face but it wasn't bright, it was dark. And you heard wooyoung's laugh before everything went dark, it was hard to hear but now you were here. The room looked lavish, but there were no windows, the lights were on and there was only one gun on the far table. And one door that looked like it would open any moment now.

You were sitting on a chair, your hands and legs were tied tightly and you were stuck on the chair, slowly waking up and getting used to things once again, but something just felt off. There was a loud sound that broke through the silence and the voice sounded familiar.

“Good morning Mr. Choi, little nap refreshing for you? I didn't think that scent I gave San would make you pass out so quickly! Then again, eomma knows best what can I say?”

“…Wooyoung? Where are you! What are you talking about?”

“oh sweet, innocent y/n-innie. Did you really think San would've stayed the same innocent little boy you met back then? The same one who hated the mafia just like you do because of situations? Awe your Appa never told you why he lost everything, oh you poor poor boy.”

“Wooyoung this isn't funny! What are you talking about?!”

His laughter was ringing everywhere, the speakers he had in this room made it sound like he was everywhere yet he wasn't even near you. Yet he was watching you, and he was enjoying it all. Seeing how quick you were turning your head while trying to look calm about the situation, how your hands were balled into fist but not too tight since the robes weren't exactly loose enough for you to get out, and even if you did. Hongjoong was waiting right outside the door, ear piece in while he heard wooyoung’s little speech, he was enjoying himself truly, pressing a button that showed a screen in front of you with a recording. It was your Appa; he was sitting with san's father in a room where it was just the two of them sitting across each other from a wooden desk, Mr. Choi having a suitcase next to him while your Appa looked more uneasy, more scared even.

“You know Mr. [last name], I trusted you a lot given the last couple of years. Truly I have, even when you told me you were struggling. After all, family helps family, and you were like a brother to me, someone I'd help at the quickness of a text.”

“And trust me, Mr. Choi I respect every action I do.”

“You told me you wanted to raise a family, yet I see you using my money on trips? Mistresses and everything? Leaving your pregnant wife in our care like she wouldn't have told my wife everything while leaving her with nothing?”

He opened the briefcase, laying out pictures of him with different women, in resorts and showing off money like it was his own. His ring was off in each picture, proof of everything, and pictures of you. Growing up with your mother and even san when he was still too young to understand, with the last picture of the two of you in freshman year of college, cheeks being pressed together with the brightest smiles you two could've given. You looked happy, each picture had timestamps with where you were, text where your Appa told you where he would go, and actual proof of where he was and with who. The look on your Appa's face said it all, guilt.

“See now I have to cut you off, and my money is the only thing allowing your son to stay in school with san, let alone in the same neighborhood. And you lied to me, to your wife, to your own Son who looked up to you and his own mother. How could you do such a thing?”

“Mr. Choi- please- maybe Y/n can stay with you-”

“You want him to see San change into me? San is the only son I have, the heir to the entire mafia. He's been putting it off to spend more time with y/n. But now he needs to make a hard choice, So no. Your family will have to pay with the choices you've made. You won't be able to leave the state, neither will your son since I know my Son. He will grow obsessed, missing him so much he dives into the work head on and willing to take on anything. And when the day happens when he finds y/n, there will be nothing you can do. Nothing he can do either, because by then San will have learned everything, how to hide the want in his eyes, the dark intentions in his mind, he'll be able to hide it all so well until he sees them again, and takes what is his.”

“Sir- you can't do that. My son just wants to sing-”

“Don't worry, San won't keep him caged in the house, but caged in the state. Any dreams of y/n leaving and getting you two out, If your wife still wants you, if she did it would be Y/n can have some normalcy in his already crumbling life. But y/n will still be able to have access to everything he could ever dream of, expect leaving. Even if San became a singer with your little boy, y/n could go anywhere without him near, and if he goes, his other friends go and they will grow to be something not even I saw coming, with your son being the prize between it all.

The video cut off, wooyoung spinning in the chair while Hongjoong had quietly made his way inside of the room, both of them now seeing the shocked look on your face as everything came to a head. This was all planned, everything from the moment you came back to know, and the person who planned it all was the one person you trusted more and was more excited to see and watch him remember who you were. But you'd never imagined that sweet little boy now being the head of all of this, but what hurts more is knowing the reasons everything was lost, was because the money and fame got to peoples heads and now everything had fallen apart in front of them and there was nothing anyone could do, not even you.

Trying to stop the tears from flowing, you blinked and tried to move around, wanting to get out and probably throw something, hit someone or even slap Your father and maybe even san if you got the chance to do so. But wooyoung's voice cut through the room once again, and his voice was still cheery but firm, something he rarely ever did.

“Here is how things are going to play out for you y/n, you are going t be seen as someone who's untouchable, and those who even try it or think about it are going to be tortured in ways that will make you sick. But, we will train you since San can't bring himself to even lay a harmful hand on you, though he would do wonders in bed. I've heard his drunk confession one too many times. But like his father said, you won't be caged to the house with no human interactions unless it's us. You'll still be able to do things you wished to, but you can't leave the state without all 8 of us, and don't test me. I had to learn things and if I get permission, I could do things, not too bad but I can and I will. Tonight is the night where San sits on the throne after getting gifts from other mafia's, all of which we will take over since there are only 7 other major mafia’s and it worked since we all grew up together and make sure no one tries anything even those from out-of-state wanting to take over. And soon me and hongjoong will walk you down to him, and know this, trying to fight or cause a scene won't hep you. Unless you're yelling at your father and in that case by all means, yell at him. But we have places to go!”

Hearing the cuffs click, you looked behind you to see hongjoong takin them off before helping you up. His smile was gentle but his eyes were dark, everything was going too fast, soon you were out of the room with a skipping wooyoung on one side and a calm hongjoong on the other taking you to a pair of doors before they slowly opened. San's back was turned to you, he was walking to the chair after getting the welcoming speech done while his father pulled out the head chair for him to sit on, the moment he did that's when you saw his face. It had a dark look in his eyes, his smile was soft and gentle though, he looked more relaxed than he was hours ago while he watched you walk closer, the dazed look in your eyes while you got closer to him, watching him smile as he held you hand and softly kissed your knuckles, this was your life now. And there was nothing anyone could do about it even if they wanted to.

“you just can't ever keep quiet now can you? This small room can barely give me enough room to fuck you.”:

San huffed out, holding your hair in one hand, and keeping one of your legs up against the wall in another. It was after a long concert the 9 of you had; it was nothing new for you, after that day things felt wrong at first. But despite his dark nature san was still kind to you, he never pushed you to do things, unless it was training then he sadly had to, but other than that he stayed near and watched you slowly get used to your new life, but also trying to get things done with KQ. It took nearly 3 years for things to fall into a new normal, sometimes San would stay away just because he knew he was too angry and he refused to let you get caught in that, but today? He just had to fuck you. Even if he didn't make it to the hotel you were staying at. He took your hand after everyone was leaving and ran into a room, the moment the door had closed he kissed you.

Holding your neck in his hand while keeping you against the door, your legs wrapping around his waist while his free hand and undoing the belts. He was so needy, so pissed off and the reason? It rained and your shirt was sticking to your chest, your pants, and it didn't help that everyone was throwing water at each other earlier. It was something he just need to let out before he returned to the hotel and slept with you, though he had a feeling you'd be asleep given everything from performing to now. He had your face against the door, your hips against his while his hips never seemed to stop or slow down.

Each in was hitting things perfectly, the sound of the shirt chains hitting each other, your moans probably being heard from outside but he didn't care. He wanted to hear you, to see you drool while your legs were struggling to stay up and support you still but he never seemed to stop. HIs eyes looked dark, not the scary dark but the lustful dark, enjoying the pleads he heard, seeing you try to claw at the door since it was the only thing you seemed to be Abel to hold while his thrust never seemed to end and it was something he was enjoying too much and there was nothing anyone could do about it, and he enjoyed that. Looking down and seeing your ass jiggle was replaying in his mind non-stopped. Gods, he loved watching your body react to each touch he gave you.

His eyes darting from your ass to your face, seeing how you were trying to look back with high-pitched moans that made it hard for you to even say his name. But he also loved how quick you were losing your voice, knowing he and the others would have to come up with a reason you were having trouble talking and had to take a break but he could worry about that in the morning just like everyone else would have to.

“S-San!… The cars! Fuck come on I have to walk!”

“The cars wait on me remember Mr.Choi? Or do I need to remind you about that?”

“San- Ngh!”

The sound of skin slapping got louder, your moans shaking the room while and even leaking outside some. Jongho collecting 20s from everyone because he placed a bet that by the end of the night, San wouldn't wait to get to the room or even the car ride, he'd take you to a storage room and take you right then and there and there would be nothing anyone could do about it. He enjoyed the extra money, keeping it to himself while everyone had to wait for San to be done. Hopefully, the ride home would be silent.

“come on Mr. Choi, cum for me. Anywhere I can tell. Gods, you keep squeezing like you don't want this to end yet here you are telling me about cars, so needy you are.”

Each touch was like setting a fire, the way his hands moved up to squeeze your nipples just to hear the broken cry and seeing how you were shaking. He could see your eyes roll back as you released, but he had to keep his arms out to catch you, pressing you against the door as he kneeled down on the floor. He looked up at your dazed yet shocked expression, What was he about to do? He already made you see the stars once, there was no way you could do it twice with everyone waiting on you but he seemed to have different plans for the rest of the night.

San laid your legs on his large shoulders before taking your cock in his mouth, sure it wasn't too big or small, but it fit just right. This was something he never mind doing, sucking you off knowing you were sensitive and trying to stay quiet but there was on point. The way he would squeeze your inner thighs while hearing the way your breathes quickened while your hands were gripping his short black hair tightly. Your hips bucking despite how fast he was moving his head, moaning around you just to tease you. Feeling how you were shaking just by his mouth. His gagging sounds being covered over by the sounds of your whimpers, each hair tag gave off another moan, the way his long tongue swirled around the tip, pressing down on the silt just to watch you tremble, the scream you let out sounded so broken, like you were trying to reach a high note but you failing at it.

But he stayed still, tasting your own cum before slowly pulling away. He was careful since he had to get you dressed after cleaning you up yet again, but also getting you dressed and carrying you in arms. After making sure his outfit was fixed, he carried you out of the small room and went to join the others in the lobby, seeing them all turn to look at him carrying you, seonghwa looking the most shocked while Jongho just wanted to go to the hotel room to sleep, wanting to not even question what was happening here anymore.

“San we have got to talk about this-. He can't even stop his legs from shaking!’

“it's alright, I'll give him a bath when we get to the rooms, are the cars here?”

“…Are you fucking kidding me.”

[rose-maidenn]

Pac : Let's get insights on your purpose for the next 5 months !

nov-dec-jan-feb-mar

using safe passage tarot from "Agatha all along"

Pile 1-2-3

Hey guys hope you're doing well , chose the Pile that calls to you intuitively, know that I'm not gonna sugarcoat things because I want your best . Hope you enjoy this

For more see masterlist and paid readings

Pile 1 :

You are represented by the king of wands a very charismatic person , you attract people who are looking for growth and you are someone who always wins in all fields you exactly know where to play the cards right to win . Alternatively for the other part of the group king of wands can mean someone who's nose is kind of everywhere they're at too many different things not giving one thing the change to reach the full potential.

What's missing is an ending !!! Ending to certain things relationships, people , in order to reach something new you have to let the old things go which is something you have to learn . You need stronger boundaries , more self worth and less attachment issues .

The lessons you have learnt is represented by the queen of wands it is about social settings I feel like you're someone who easily becomes friends with everyone and that's a good networking skill. You could also be someone who is very creative and starts at everything their heart calls for .

Your path ahead is represented by death , it calls for an ending ending of doubts , bad thought patters , old beliefs and relationships let shit go and see what happens .

Your Obstacles is represented by chariot I feel in this case it's about you staying in the same zone and resisting change it's like an ouroburos moving but in the wrong places and wrong circles , cut the string , your comfort zone is killing you honey

O of wands in this case is like don't wait around for anyone not even about being ready yourself just do what you need to do end the things that you need to you can't drag this anymore dear, this could also be about drug addiction or addiction in general .

Your destination is magician yay ! You know how if you just let shit go the magic happens so will it happen for you. Just let it go let people be , only work for yourself, give yourself all, heal and you will know you're powerful, you don't need a guru you're the star itself.

Thank you for reading, if you liked this and would like personal insights or a longer read to book click here .

Pile 2 :

You are represented by four of cups , you are someone who wants what they want and won't settle for anything. I sense a stern energy . Alternatively you might be someone who is extremely bored these days and just wants to lay .

What is missing is justice , you need to work hard rn for your dreams , but in the write direction I won't say you never worked hard but somehow in the wrong way , you might have a retrograde Saturn. You need to find what can do justice to yourself as you owe yourself everything and you are worth everything.

The path behind is represented by page of wands , your reading is like you were a very enthusiastic person once but now you have lost the zing for life . You have a great influx of ideas why don't you use them dear.

Path ahead is represented by the empress , clearly you are to start working on these ideas start the creative project take the leap. Focus on letting your creativity flow , your intuition knows , your soul knows.

The Obstacles is represented by eight of coins is that you need to learn dedication and working on something even if it takes time be it studying , art or relationships you are called to enjoy the journey and not just the victory.

Represented by ace of wands in this case I think you should avoid working on something new until you finish the old , you need to give one thing commitment and mastery then you will reach your destination

Represented by the king of cups. Mature and passionate about what they do . This infact represents a chance that you might become the best at what you wanna do . You might become a professor a teacher or a guide to people if you choose to follow this path .

Thank you for reading, if you liked this and would like personal insights or a longer read to book click here .

Pile 3 :

You are represented by six of coins a very beautiful earthy loving energy of gratitude and kindness , you give without thinking anything part of why you are blessed with more .

Ten of swords is what is missing in my deck it's literally a person cutting off a hand honey someone is using you , the awareness and discernment on who deserves your time money and energy is the thing that is missing .

You have learnt that people will be who they are despite giving your all so why don't you apply that in new relationships keep the knowledge but also use it . Alternatively this could be about relationship and someone leaving you in the past who was toxic.

The path ahead is represented by the fool , you're in the start of a new journey you have endless possibilities you can now leap into new and have faith that universe will do the best for you.

Your Obstacles are represented by death , you're ruminating on a past relationship too much which is making you work extra even for the bare minimum you have to work to stay in your queen energy don't do too much it's not worth it .

You must overcome the queen of wands I think this is a toxic person who was in your life you said you stupid shit that didn't align with you and now you have taken their words literally , recognize who this is maybe a family member a friend or a youtuber guru idk they have flowery energy but they're unhealed

Your destination is represented by the two of cups yay a union this can be the union of your logic and intuition. Masculine and feminine energie or a new relationship:) all in all an energy of balance and love .

Thank you for reading, if you liked this and would like personal insights or a longer read to book click here .

[colonelarr0w]

 Hiiii, I have a request. Imagine a highschool AU where reader has a massive crush on Sukuna but she thinks he has a thing with Uraume, but he actually likes her. Ok ok, so hear me out. Reader is childhood friends with Yuuji and Sukuna and she notices how Sukuna and Uraume have been hanging out a lot. So she asks Yuuji if Sukuna is going to prom and he says yes, and that he is probably going with Uraume. So reader is sad and doesn't want to go to prom anymore even after already buy her dress. Buttt, the day before prom, Sukuna and Reader end up talking and she mentions how he and Uraume are going together and he is confused.  Then they both confess and end up going together. Pleaseeeeee make this as angsty as possible, I love me some good angst😫

A/N - Ooh, you know I love me some angst. And considering that it's actually prom season right now, this makes this fic that much more personal to me (I don't have a date LMAO).

The Other Woman

Preview - "The fuck was so great about Uruame anyway? Maybe it was her intelligence, maybe it was her athleticism. Or maybe, just maybe, it was her ability to interact with Sukuna without stumbling over every other word."

Warning(s) - mature themes, foul language, mention of violence (Sukuna will be Sukuna)

Word Count - 4.3k

It was April now. 

The season where girls compared prom dresses and guys anxiously put together their extravagant plans to ask the girl of their dreams to prom. It was the season that also revealed who was romantically interested in who — the couples that were thought to have been endgame break up juust before prom season, and if luck was truly a real thing, two people that nobody thought were romantically interested in the other were suddenly sucking face in the hallway.  

And even though you had been saying since the beginning of the school year that you likely were not going to attend prom … 

 … you found yourself standing in a dress shop with Nobara and Maki, both of whom were dressing you in flashy colors and, quite frankly, expensive dresses. 

“You’re kidding! Of course you’re going to prom, we’re not going without you,” Nobara comments, her tone offended as if you had told her that her shirt didn’t match her pants. Maki crosses her arms over her chest, agreeing wholeheartedly with the brunette at her side.  

“Come on Nobara, it’s not like it’s gonna be worth it. You both have dates,” you point out, taking a sip from your water bottle and sending both of your friends knowing looks.  

“And? You can go with Yuuji, you’ve both been conjoined at the hip since grade school,” Maki retaliates with a raise of her eyebrow. Nobara nods in agreement.  

“First of all, I’m not taking my guy best friend to prom. I don’t want people to get the wrong idea,” you begin, holding up your hand and using your fingers as an imaginary list. “And second, I kind of want someone to ask me that is … y’know … romantically interested in me.” 

Nobara claps her hands together as the curtain of your dressing room is yanked to the side, her smile widening impossibly further as she silently commands you to spin. You comply, turning in a circle in the royal blue dress that she had forced you into.  

“I don’t know,” you say for the umpteenth time. Nobara deflates in her seat, turning her head to Maki in the hopes that maybe she would say something to convince you. But the green-haired girl doesn’t say anything, because in a way she understands.  

“Come on (Y/N). Help us out here,” Nobara all but begs you, standing from her chair and walking over to you. She turns you in the direction of the full-body mirror in front of you, her hands affectionately squeezing her shoulders. “What color do you want to wear? Let’s start there.” 

“I don’t even want to go Nobara,” you retaliate, meeting her gaze in the mirror’s reflection. She sighs again, dramatically letting go of you and sulking once she returns to her seat.  

Maki rolls her eyes, finally walking over to you and glancing at you through the mirror. “Here, instead of color, who do you want to go to prom with?” 

You freeze, already feeling your cheeks heat as your eyes flicker to momentarily meet Maki’s in the reflection.  

“D’you think Sukuna is actually going to prom?” you ask Yuuji, stealing a chip from the bag that he holds and grinning to yourself as he silently shifts to ensure that you won’t steal another. He lifts his legs, crossing his ankles over one another as he hums in thought.  

“I think he might’ve mentioned it. But you know him,” Yuuji pauses to eat another chip, “he’s not really one for those kinds of parties, y’know?” 

You nod, but at the same time you can feel your heart sinking. Was it really a secret that you had a crush on the older brother of your childhood best friend? Honestly … no. But everyone but Sukuna knew (obviously), and yet nobody had really tried anything to help push you together.  

Maybe that was because of his reputation, or maybe it was because your friends were trying to “protect” you from someone that you really didn’t need to be shielded from.  

“Actually, now that you mention it,” Yuuji turns to you, crumpling up the now empty chip bag and tossing it into the garbage bin just a few feet in front of the two of you. “I think he mentioned asking Uruame to prom.” 

You fall silent, nodding your head. “Mm … right.” 

“I don’t know,” you answer again, shrugging your shoulders and already moving back towards the dressing room. You rip open the curtain, stepping inside and sighing. You lift your hands, rubbing them over your face as Yuuji’s words replay like a broken record in your head.  

The fuck was so great about Uruame anyway? 

Maybe it was her intelligence, maybe it was her athleticism. Or maybe, just maybe, it was her ability to interact with Sukuna without stumbling over every other word.  

You glance upward at the small mirror in the dressing room, already reaching behind you to unzip the dress. You step out of it, returning it to its hanger before emerging again from the dressing room. Nobara and Maki glance up at you, having expected you to be wearing another dress. 

“I think I’m done for today, if anything, I’ll just wear an old dress,” you say nonchalantly, trying to hide the waver that had started to creep into your tone. Maki nods understandingly, but Nobara rises to her feet and promptly places both hands on her hips.  

“(Y/N),” she says sternly, stomping over to you and grabbing both of your hands into her own. “We are going to find you a perfect fucking dress, you are going to have a perfect fucking time at prom, and we are going to all go together because fuck men.” 

Maki sighs, pinching the bridge of her nose between her thumb and index finger. "Nobara-" she begins, but her words are quickly cut off by a dismissive wave of Nobara's hand.  

"Now come on," Nobara places her palms flat against the backs of your shoulders, pushing you back towards the dressing room and turning to get the attention of the consultant who had been helping the three of you. "We're finding you a dress, and it's gonna be perfect." 

< ... > 

"Here brat, got you those fuckin' chips that you won't shut up about," Sukuna rolls his eyes as he closes the front door. He turns towards the couch, promptly throwing a bag of chips at Yuuji's face. You bite back the chuckle that claws up your throat as Yuuji yells out in surprise, pressing his palms against his face.  

"The hell?! Uncalled for!" Yuuji whips his head around to send a glare to his older brother, the latter of whom only shrugs before turning his attention to you.  

"Here, got you somethin' too," he says gruffly, clearing his throat as he rummages through the white plastic bag that he's slung over his arm. From it he removes a bag of candy that you had mentioned liking, which he hands to you. 

"Oh, thanks Sukuna!" You turn to smile at him as you take it, fingers momentarily brushing against his own. The contact brings a gentle pink hue to your cheeks, though his face remains stoic as ever – completely unreadable. As he usually was.  

Sukuna only grunts in response to your thanks, then turning on his heel and promptly vanishing into his room. You return your attention to the movie that Yuuji had put on, noticing him staring at you out of the corner of your eye. 

"What?" 

"Do you … shit (Y/N) … do you like my brother?"  

You cough, Yuuji's question catching you completely off of your guard. You whip your head to face him, cheeks heating at the knowing smile that your best friend wears. He abandons his chips, already rising to his feet.  

Shit. 

You spring up from your place on the couch, already diving for Yuuji. Your arms lock around his waist, knocking both him and yourself to the ground. "Don't you fucking dare." 

The pink-haired boy merely laughs in response, opening his mouth to yell. You yelp, pressing both of your palms against his lips and pressing down hard. He winces, but his eyes are still crinkled in that bright little shit-eating grin that continues to remind you just how fucked you were.  

You stare down at him, eyes as cold as ice. "Say a word and I'll kill you." 

Yuuji only rolls his eyes, but that shit-eating grin never once fades from his face.  

< ... > 

"See! I told you that we would find the perfect dress!" Nobara says proudly, hands on her hips as she admires you from behind. Her eyes meet yours in the reflection of your bedroom's mirror, lips turned upward in a smile.  

You had to admit, the dress was absolutely gorgeous. It was (Y/F/C) with gentle highlights and trimmings that fit around both your chest and waist. The center of the dress was corseted, accentuating your figure; and the train of the dress was long enough to flow behind you, but not long enough that you would trip over it.  

You turn your body around in the mirror, admiring the lace-up back of the dress. For the first time in a very long time, you felt pretty.  

"Alright, alright, fine. I'll admit … it is very pretty." You bite back a chuckle as Nobara claps her hands together, giddily turning to Maki and waiting for the green-haired girl to verbally approve as well.  

"You do look amazing (Y/N)," Maki nods in agreement, her compliment bringing a gentle smile to your face. Nobara nods her head frantically, turning back to you and grinning again as her eyes rake up and down your figure.  

The three of you pause at the sound of your front door opening and closing, followed then by your mother happily greeting whoever it was that had turned up on your doorstep. Nobara shoots you a confused look, one that you respond to with a confused look of your own.  

"(Y/N)! Yuuji's here!"  

You sigh, lifting your fingers to your nose and pinching at the bridge of your nose. You had completely forgotten that you had agreed to go to the arcade with Yuuji, and now here you were, standing in a prom dress even after you had told him countless times that you simply weren't going.  

Nobara and Maki exchange glances, but neither of them say anything to you or each other.  

"Okay! You can let him upstairs!"  

The sound of foosteps approaching your door already has your blood running cold, but the expression that Yuuji wears when he opens your bedroom door makes it somehow colder.  

"Oh wow (Y/N)! You look great! But I thought you said that you weren't coming to prom?" Yuuji points out, tilting his head curiously at you as he angles himself to close the door behind him. He glances then at both Nobara and Maki, neither girl answering him, leaving it completely up to you.  

You clear your throat, shifting uncomfortably from one foot to another as you turn to face Yuuji completely. "Yeah … I know. Nobara kind of convinced me." 

"Well, that's good!" Yuuji smiles sweetly, already moving towards your desk chair and flopping down into it. "Are you going with anyone?" 

You remain silent – and that's when Nobara decides to step in, noticing the uncomfortable expression that you wear at Yuuji's question.  

"She's coming with me and Maki," she answers. You nod, clearing your throat as you turn to Yuuji, half-expecting him to furrow his eyebrows at you. But luckily, he smiles at Nobara's response, nodding his head and deciding not to breach the subject any further.  

< … > 

"There you are, where's the brat?" Sukuna asks as he approaches you, leaning against the locker beside your own. You chuckle lightly at him, tilting your head to glance up at him – oddly enough, he was already staring at you.  

"Yuuji? I think he's just finishing up with the Occult Club," you answer, removing your biology textbook from your locker before pushing the metal door shut. Sukuna hums, crossing his arms and tilting his head away from you.  

He looks like he wants to say something, but is conflicted on whether or not he should actually say it. You study him for a second, opening your mouth to say something.  

"There you both are! I'm ready to go home now," Yuuji says brightly, waving at both you and Sukuna from halfway down the hallway. He extends his hand to you, the both of you performing the handshake that you had perfected sometime during middle school. Sukuna rolls his eyes at the both of you, kicking off of the lockers and already swinging his keys on his index finger.  

"Took you long enough," Sukuna comments with a harsh roll of his eyes, though you don't fail to notice the small smirk that tugs at the corner of Sukuna's mouth. "C'mon, let's get out of here." 

Yuuji nods, linking his arm with your own and lightly tugging you towards the school's exit. He grins at you as you stumble on your feet, letting out a small "Yuuji!" at his antics. Sukuna only shakes his head, following behind the both of you – keeping his distance.  

"So, (Y/N), anyone asked you to prom yet?" Yuuji asks, his voice loud enough for Sukuna to hear behind him. You stand rigid in your best friend's hold, eyes flickering to his own. "Surely a girl like you got asked, right? With a big bouquet of flowers and--" 

"Yuuji, stop," you say harshly, voice venomous as you push yourself out of Yuuji's arms. He glances at you, eyebrows furrowed together in confusion. He opens his mouth to say something, but you hold a hand up, effectively cutting him off.  

"I'm not going to prom with anyone because the person I wanted to go with is interested in someone else, okay? Is that what you wanted to fucking hear?" You lift a hand to wipe at your suddenly teary eyes, sighing to yourself and shaking your head.  

"(Y/N), that's not what I--" 

"Forget it. I'm just gonna take the bus home," you murmur to yourself, turning and walking straight past Sukuna, not even turning to apologize when your shoulder knocks against his own. His eyes follow you, narrowed in both confusion and irritation. Even so, he makes no move to follow you … 

… even though he so desperately wants to. 

< … > 

"I-it was so humiliating Nobara! Just … just imagine how disgusted he must be with me right now!" You throw your hands up as you continue pacing, talking through your tears as best that you can. Though it proves to be a struggle, you manage to get your point across and speak for long enough before you dissolve into tears again.  

Nobara's eyes soften, gaze flickering momentarily to Maki, who only wears an expression similar to the former's. She stands, opening her arms to you. They lock around you as you all but fall into them, clawing at her back and pressing your face into her shoulder, crying quietly into the fabric of her shirt.  

"He's not disgusted with you," Nobara begins, but you're quick to cut her off, only crying more. Her hand smooths up and down the length of your spine, her gaze once again flickering to Maki in the hopes that maybe she would say something … anything … to comfort you.  

But just like Nobara, Maki is at a loss for words, sitting quietly on your bed and watching you promptly break down in the expanse of Nobara’s arms.  

“He is! He has to be, c’mon, I totally just — just left him there!” The grip you have over Nobara’s shoulders tighten, holding her impossibly tighter as you try to comfort yourself in her arms. The attempt is futile, and in reality, it only makes you feel worse.  

“I’m sure that he understands.” 

“It’s Sukuna, Maki!” You pry yourself from Nobara’s arms, swallowing the growing lump in your throat and angrily swiping at the tears that cling to your waterline. You sigh, allowing your head to fall into the palms of your hands, nails digging into the sides of your head.  

“Come on (Y/N),” Maki says gently, moving towards you and placing a hand on your shoulder. Her fingers squeeze at you comfortingly, a small smile curling her lips upward as you finally turn your head to make eye contact with her. “It’s a simple misunderstanding, I don’t think that Sukuna is going to automatically hate you because of it.”  

You sigh shakily, allowing her to gently guide you to the edge of your bed. She pushes onto your shoulders, then sitting down beside you while Nobara sits in your desk chair — which she had pulled up to the side of the bed so that she could sit directly in front of you.  

“Prom is tomorrow,” you murmur, sighing again a rubbing a hand down your face. Nobara and Maki exchange solemn looks, but neither of them say anything to one another. “And I just … maybe I shouldn’t go.” 

Nobara immediately shakes her head, nearly stumbling from her seat from the force at which she leans back. Maki instinctively reaches for her, hands ready to brace the brunette if she were to fall.  

“What?! After everything that we did? We got a dress, we went out and bought makeup, and we even rented a limo with everyone else!” Nobara says sharply, though her voice doesn’t hold any of the malice that you had expected it too. You knew what she was trying to do anyway, convince you by slightly guilting you into thinking that by you not being there, prom night would essentially be ruined.  

You sniffle, rubbing a hand against your tear-stained cheeks. Maki reaches out, rubbing a hand against your back. Of course, she wants you to go to prom as well, but unlike Nobara, she wouldn’t sit there and guilt trip you into going. If you didn’t want to go, then it was as simple as that, you didn’t want to go.  

“I-I know that, but Nobara—“ 

“Stop.” Nobara stands then, her hands on either side of your face and squishing your cheeks together. “We’re going to prom together, and that’s that. Got it?” 

You sigh, blinking back the last bits of tears that cling to your lashes. And against your better judgement, even though you so desperately want to stay home all day tomorrow and rot …  

 … you nod against the skin of Nobara’s palms.  

< … > 

"(Y/N)! Guys!" Yuuji waves wildly from the front entrance of the school's gymnasium, lips turned upward in a wide grin as you, Nobara, and Maki approach. Standing beside Yuuji is Sukuna – who looks as though the only thing he craves at that moment is going home and vanishing for the weekend. 

Uruame wasn't with him though … maybe she just hadn't arrived yet. 

Nobara smiles as you all approach Yuuji, accepting his fist-bump. You turn to him as well, extending your hand at the same moment he does, the both of you performing that oh-so-elaborate handshake.  

“You look nice,” Yuuji says to you, smiling. You return his smile, turning on your heel and marveling as your dress’ train lifts from the ground, creating a small circle around you as you turn. Yuuji turns then to Sukuna, whose eyes dart away as if he had been caught looking at something that he shouldn’t have been.  

“Yeah … nice,” Sukuna murmurs underneath his breath. His comment brings a gentle pink hue to your cheeks, and in thanks, you nod your head at him.  

“C’mon, let’s go inside!” Nobara says happily, her lips tuned upward in a smile as she reaches for your hands, tugging you towards the entrance of the gymnasium. You glance fleetingly at Sukuna, whose eyes are still fixed on anything but you — you wonder what color Uruame would wear. 

Would she match him? Or would she wear a different color that complimented the one he wore? 

You shake your head, bringing yourself back to reality as you allow Nobara to tug you towards the doors, her lips still turned upward in a delighted smile as she and Maki already begin nodding their heads in tune with the loud music that blares from inside of the gymnasium.  

“Hey, (Y/N).”  

You turn, eyebrows raised as you notice Sukuna looking at you, his body angled so that he faces you. His fingers twitch slightly, debating on whether or not they should reach out for you.  

“Yeah?” 

“Can I talk to you? Jus’ for a second,” Sukuna responds gruffly, clearing his throat and hoping that the dimly lit sky was enough to hide the pink color that dusted his cheeks.  

Nobara, Maki, and Yuuji all exchange knowing looks, their lips all turning upwards into Cheshire-cat-like smiles. None of them say a single word as they slip through the gymnasium’s open doors, leaving both you and Sukuna at the entrance.   

“Everything okay?” you ask, tilting your head at Sukuna. He swallows, shoulders tensing and hands curling into white-knuckled fists. His nails, which had always been long, are no doubt leaving behind crescent-shaped marks on the skin of his palm — what the hell had him so nervous? 

He hesitates, eyes flickering momentarily to you before they look away again. “Everything’s,” he clears his throat, “everything’s fine.” 

You furrow your eyebrows together, not quite believing him. You lift your arms to cross them over your chest, shifting on your foot before finally noticing a tuft of white hair in the distance. You open your mouth to comment, but something stops you.  

“So … where’s Uruame?” you settle for asking, glancing up at him and teasingly wiggling your eyebrows at him. He turns to you, eyebrows furrowed in confusion.  

“The fuck are you talking about?” 

“Uruame. You’re waiting out here for her aren’t you? Don’t tell me you’re gonna make her walk into prom all by herself,” you turn on your heel to chastise him, pointing a finger at his chest. The crease between his eyebrows only deepens as you continue — which you take as a sign to promptly shut up.  

The two of you stand in awkward silence for a moment, both of you turned away from the other in fear of what expression the other wore.  

“Uruame’s not comin’ to prom,” Sukuna murmurs with a nonchalant shrug of his shoulders. “Said she wasn’t the biggest fan of parties, not that I blame ‘er.” 

“Oh.” 

Again, neither of you say anything to the other. You can feel your cheeks burning, and in the hopes that he wouldn’t say anything, you lift your hands to your face, covering it. He tilts his head, sighing with the smallest of smirks plastered onto his face.  

“Lemme guess,” he turns to you, regaining his confidence and bending just enough so that his nose is level with your own. Your eyes widen, the pink color on your cheeks deepening at the sudden closeness. “You thought I was takin’ Uruame to prom, didn’t you?” 

“N-no,” you reply quickly, your voice a high-pitched squeak. Sukuna chuckles, shifting back on his feet and crossing his arms over his chest, staring down his nose at you. “Okay, maybe.” 

The taller man turns, leaning against the wall of the gymnasium and glancing at you through the corner of his eye. You shuffle on your feet, not daring to look up at Sukuna.  

“That why you kept tellin’ Yuuji that you weren’t comin’ to prom?” he asks, grinning as he glances at you. “‘Cause you thought I was goin’ with Uruame?” 

You remain silent — now suddenly embarrassed over your childlike reaction. To be honest, it had been petty for you to potentially throw away the entirety of your prom night over something as trivial as not having a date. But at the same time, your friends had been asked to prom by the people that they were romantically interested in — hell, even Yuuji had managed to successfully ask Megumi to prom. And that was after he had smacked himself in the face in front of his bathroom mirror.  

Sukuna chuckles, leaning his head back and crossing his arms over his chest. His fingers drum against his clothed bicep, a delighted hum rumbling up somewhere in his throat as he relishes in your reactions. He clears his throat, catching your attention. 

“Stupid,” he murmurs, reaching a hand out and laying it over the top of your head. You huff at him, smoothing your hands over your hair, hoping that all of the styling that you had done wasn’t ruined by Sukuna’s comically large palm.  

“And that makes me stupid because?” you challenge, raising an eyebrow at Sukuna. He rolls his eyes, once again leaning down to be at eye-level with you again. This time, however, you challenge his stare with one of your own — pointed and cold, though not nearly as cold as the glare situated in front of you.  

“It makes you stupid because you actually thought I’d take someone other than you to prom.” 

His words make you positively flush from head to toe. You stand as still as stone in front of him, inhaling sharply as he adjusts himself again. He offers his arm to you, nodding in the direction of the opened gymnasium doors.  

“So then why didn’t you ask me sooner?”  

Sukuna rolls his eyes, sighing. “I’m not good at that kind of stuff, but trust me, you’re the only girl that I’d have ever even considered to take to this fuckin’ thing.” 

You chuckle, rolling your eyes as you slip your arm into Sukuna’s. His chest swells at the smile that you flash at him, and in a moment of bravery, he leans down to press his lips to your own.  

Thank God that you had decided to go to prom. 

[meazalykov]

play for the crowd

lauren james x english!influencer!reader : social media + fic

summary: a fake relationship never ends well.. or does it?

warnings: angst, very long chapter

for @pinkyqily + @jackiesunshines

“welcome back to ‘call her daddy,’ babes,” alex starts with her signature grin, leaning closer to the mic. 

“today, we’ve got the it-girl of england sitting across from me. she’s hilarious, she’s fashionable, she’s friends with basically everyone worth knowing—please give it up for y/n!!”

you laugh softly, adjusting your seating in the red fancy chair.

“oh, stop it. you’re hyping me up too much.”

“listen, i only speak the truth on this podcast,” alex replies dramatically, hands gesturing like she’s addressing an audience of thousands. 

“so, let’s just jump right in. your fashion—people are obsessed. i mean, half the girls listening are probably taking notes on your outfit right now as we speak.”

you smile, settling into your seat. 

“i feel like my style is a bit all over the place, to be honest. one day i’ll be in baggy streetwear, the next i’m in a full-on luxury brand look, then i’m in some scandi-inspired minimalism, and before you know it, i’m frolicking in a meadow in a cottagecore dress. i just wear whatever’s cute.”

“so, you’re telling me your closet must look insane.” alex leans forward, clearly intrigued.

“oh, it’s a disaster,” you admit with a laugh. 

“you know when people say, ‘if you can’t see it, you won’t wear it’? yeah, my clothes are in piles. i try to organize, but then i get new stuff, and it’s chaos all over again.”

“and yet you always look put together. how does that even work?”

“magic,” you joke, adjusting your oversized blazer. 

“or maybe just panic dressing.”

alex grins. 

“fair enough. okay, now—this is a call her daddy episode where i am the nosey host, so we have to get into your social life. you’ve got so many famous friends. who’s in your circle? who’s in the inner circle?”

you raise an eyebrow.

“you’re really trying to get the tea, huh?”

“always,” alex says without hesitation. 

“give us something.”

you smirk. 

“well, i’ve got a mix of people, you know? like, models, footballers, actors... it’s a weird little melting pot. i vibe with people who are chill and don’t take life too seriously.”

“what about jude bellingham?” alex’s grin widens, mischief sparkling in her eyes. 

“you’ve been seen with him quite a bit. are we finally getting confirmation here?”

your laugh is immediate, and you shake your head as you roll your eyes playfully. 

“oh my god, no no no absolutely not. jude is not my type at all.”

alex gasps theatrically. 

“wait, hold on. you’re telling me jude bellingham, literal dreamboat that maybe has a million edits of himself, is not your type? do you know how many women would kill for that chance?”

“i’m sure they would,” you reply, still laughing. 

“but, yeah, jude and i are just friends. strictly platonic. in fact, he’s hilarious.”

alex’s eyes narrow in mock suspicion. 

“so, what is your type, then?”

you pause for a moment, knowing the question is loaded. you take a breath, then grin. 

“well, just know that i don’t swing jude’s way.”

alex’s face lights up. 

“ohhh, so you’re into women?” her excitement is palpable.

“yeah,” you say, nodding firmly. 

“i mean, people have speculated for years, so… there you go. confirmed. i like women.”

“iconic,” alex replies, clapping her hands. 

“this is huge!!!! so, do you have a partner? because i feel like everyone’s going to be dying to know now.”

a weight sinks in your chest, but you plaster on a smile. you hate lying, but this is part of the game. 

“i do,” you say carefully, keeping your voice light. 

“but i’m not spilling anything just yet.”

“oh, come on,” alex pleads. 

“not even a little hint?”

you shake your head, laughing softly. 

“nope. but trust me, everyone will know who she is eventually.”

alex groans in mock defeat, throwing her head back. 

“you’re killing me, y/n. absolutely killing me.”

“i gotta keep some mystery, alex,” you tease. 

“otherwise, what’s the fun?”

y/n.l/n

{tagged: yourbsf}

liked by lj10, samanthakerr20, and 101,927 others

y/n.l/n hello 2025

view comments

y/nl/nluvr5 SO CUTE

yourbsf ily

ashley_lawrence10 pretty! 🤩

wosofan2719 why are all of the chelsea girls in her likes?? 🫣

user6282 I thought I was the only one who peeped

random12938 after her podcast with alex on friday, I am convinced y/n's girlfriend is known to the public already. you might be onto something since she is already close with english footballers

madelineargy 😍

~view all 2,039 comments~

you’re sitting cross-legged on your plush beige couch, the soft hum of a charli xcx playlist filling the quiet of your london apartment. 

a steaming mug of tea sits on the coffee table, untouched, as you absently scroll through your phone. your eyes flick to the clock—just past noon. you’re waiting on lauren to send over the ticket details for tonight’s chelsea vs. arsenal match, the anticipated london derby.

your stomach twists slightly at the thought. not because of the game—you actually enjoy football. it’s the situation you’ve been thrown into that makes you uneasy. 

a fake relationship. a pr stunt. your team’s bright idea to boost both your profiles. it’s not like you haven’t heard the horror stories: influencer friends venting about staged dates, awkward photoshoots, and scripted chemistry with people they couldn’t stand and hated. 

you swore you’d never do something so fake, yet here you are.

your phone buzzes, snapping you out of your thoughts. it’s a message from lauren.

lauren: hey, just sent your name to the list—tickets will be at will call under 'guest of lj.' fancy title, right?

you smile faintly, typing back.

you: wow, i feel so important. 

you joke. a reply comes almost instantly.

lauren: absolutely. “fake girlfriend to chelsea star.” major clout.

you laugh under your breath, appreciating her humor despite the absurdity of the situation.

you: i can’t lie.. this is all so ridiculous. have you done this kind of thing before?

lauren: nope. first time for me too. i feel like i should apologize in advance if i make this awkward.

you: i was just about to say the same to you. we’ll both be awkward… it’ll balance out.

lauren’s next text takes a second longer to come through.

lauren: for what it’s worth, i know this isn’t ideal. but i promise i’m not a complete nightmare in person like the media can paint me out to be. 

you pause, rereading her message. there’s something about her tone—genuine, almost reassuring. however, you frown at the last part of her message. you have seen the tweets and post that have villainized her about certain situations that have happened between her and other players. you don’t play football, but you understand how intense things can be.

lauren’s genuine personality makes you think that this won’t be as terrible as you’ve been building it up to be.

you: well, if you’re not a nightmare, i guess i can survive one football match. or how ever many as i will need to go to for us. as long as i don’t get smacked with a football in front of your everyone or something.

lauren: if you do, we’ll just blame it on the opposing team.

you laugh again softly, shaking your head. her dry wit feels disarming, and you find yourself a little more curious about meeting her in person. maybe, just maybe, lauren will surprise you.

the cool london air nips at your cheeks as you step out of the car, pulling your brown puffer coat tighter around yourself. the excitement hums through the blue and red crowds gathered outside the chelsea stadium. 

you glance up at the familiar facade, the blue and white banners waving proudly in the breeze. you’ve been here before, more times than you can count, but tonight feels… different.

you make your way through the gates, clutching the ticket lauren organized for you. your name’s on the guest list, which feels oddly official, even though you know it’s all just for show. navigating the stadium is second nature by now—you’ve been here for england matches, screaming alongside the fans, but you’ve never been here for chelsea. 

the thought feels strange, almost disloyal, considering most of your friends are manchester (city and united) fans through and through.

their reactions flash through your mind, the way they nearly lost it when you casually mentioned you were going on a "date" with a chelsea player.

"you’re joking, right? chelsea? you can’t be serious," one had said, barely hiding their disbelief.

"wait, who is it?" another pressed, practically bouncing in their seat. 

"don’t tell me it’s lucy bronze—no, wait, she just transferred here so i don’t think it's her."

you’d shrugged them off, offering nothing but a sly smile. “you’ll find out soon enough,” you’d teased, leaving them to spiral into speculation. you didn’t have the heart—or the nerve—to explain the truth yet. 

not until you’d met lauren in person, not until you knew how this whole fake relationship would pan out.

as you approach the friends and family section, a subtle wave of nervousness rolls over you. this is it—the start of whatever chaotic media circus your teams have orchestrated. you take a deep breath, smoothing the invisible wrinkles on your coat, and step inside.

you wonder if people will question your presence in that section, why you were here by yourself with none of your friends to accompany you. however, you decide to take the next 90 minutes to collect your thoughts while lauren plays her match.

taking your seat, directly where you can see the middle of the pitch, the noise of the crowd fills your ears as you settle. your focus is razor-sharp. your eyes stay locked on lauren as she moves across the pitch with ease, weaving through arsenal's defense like it’s second nature. 

the game already started three minutes ago.. and she’s good…really good. you knew that already, of course, seeing her play live is something else entirely.

you shift in your seat, trying to keep your expression neutral. the plan is simple: be here, watch the match, and appear supportive. it’s harder than you thought to ignore the weight of the cameras that occasionally pan away from the game and land on you instead. 

you know what the headlines will say. you can already picture the tweets that are posting on twitter as your eye move along lauren’s body.

the speculation is what you’re here for. you tap your fingers against the armrest of your seat, trying to drown out the chatter in your head. this is all part of the plan, you remind yourself. 

still, the questions buzzing online are ones you’re not ready to answer. not yet. this isn’t even real after all.

your eyes dart back to lauren. she’s on the ball again, making a sharp run from a sharp pass from lucy that sets up a near-perfect chance. the crowd erupts, and you find yourself caught between genuine admiration for her skill and the uncomfortable reality of why you’re here. with the cameras on you, though, you know better than to let anything too much slip. 

you lean forward slightly, keeping your attention locked on lauren, as though she’s the only thing that matters in the moment.

the game ends with a 2-1 win for chelsea. you stand awkwardly by the fruit stand in the lounge room area, pretending to be invested in the arrangement of grapes and orange slices. the truth is, you feel out of place. 

this isn’t your scene, and it shows. the other friends and family members seem at ease, chatting and laughing like they belong here. you, however, can’t shake the anxiety in your chest. of course, people recognize you—this is england, after all. your face is plastered on magazine covers and social media feeds. here, in this context, you feel more exposed than ever.

you shift your weight from foot to foot, glancing at the clock on the wall. lauren’s team has just wrapped up their post-match debrief, and any minute now, she’ll walk in. the thought doesn’t help your nerves; if anything, it makes them worse. 

you haven’t even met her in person before, yet the entire world will soon think that she’s your girlfriend. the absurdity of it all threatens to make you laugh, but the knot in your stomach keeps you grounded.

you’re about to reach for a piece of pineapple when you feel a light touch on your shoulder. the sensation startles you, and you turn around quickly, almost dropping the toothpick you’re holding.

“i didn’t know you could be so shy, y/n,” lauren says, her tone teasing but warm. she’s standing there, freshly showered, her hair damp and swept back. the post-match attitude has faded, leaving her looking relaxed, but there’s a spark of curiosity in her eyes as she takes you in.

you smile nervously, your fingers fidgeting with the hem of your blazer. 

“well, i’m usually not,” you reply, your voice quieter than you intended. 

“but this is… a little out of my comfort zone.”

lauren’s brows raise slightly, and she steps closer, her presence somehow steadying. 

“really? you, out of your comfort zone? that’s hard to believe.”

you glance down, feeling heat rise to your cheeks. 

“it’s different when it’s not my crowd. football people, you know? i’m more used to influencer events or fashion shows, not… this.”

lauren chuckles softly. 

“well, for what it’s worth, you look like you fit right in. maybe too well. people are already whispering about you.”

“great,” you mutter, trying to keep the sarcasm light but unable to mask your discomfort. 

“exactly what i wanted.”

she tilts her head, studying you for a moment. 

“it’ll die down eventually,” she says, her tone more serious now. 

“but i get it. it’s weird, isn’t it? pretending like this? its going to be worse once we have to tell the media.”

you let out a small laugh, more out of relief that she said it than anything else. 

“weird doesn’t even begin to cover it,” you admit. 

“i mean, we haven’t even met before today, and now the world will think that we’re madly in love. it’s ridiculous.”

lauren nods, a faint smirk tugging at the corner of her lips. 

“yeah, it is. but hey, we’re in this together, right?.”

you meet her gaze. she’s genuine, at least, and that’s something. “you’re right,” you say softly, your smile more genuine now. 

“i guess we’ll figure it out.”

she grins, and the moment feels strangely natural despite the layers of pretense surrounding it. then she gestures toward the lounge area where the other players’ families are gathered. 

“come on. let’s get you out of the corner. they’re going to think i’m a terrible girlfriend if i leave you standing here alone.”

you laugh, following her lead, the tension still present but slightly eased by her presence. it’s strange, walking beside her, knowing that the world will see something entirely different from what you feel inside. 

for now, you push that thought aside and focus on surviving the night.

lj10

{tagged: y/n.l/n}

liked by y/n.l/n, lucybronze, and 131,216 others

lj10 recent

view comments

random28383 IS THAT WHO I THINK IT ISSS??????

y/nl8vr MY BABY ON THE THIRD SLIDE

chelseafcwfan7 I KNEW IT WAS LAUREN THAT WAS DATING Y/N

❤️ *liked by author*

y/n.l/n 😘😘

user91010 oh that's not..

meazalykov ??

user91010 @/meazalykov i did not expect lauren and y/n no shade..

meazalykov well too bad..

lucybronze hard launch era

catarina_macario 😍😍

~view all 10,378 comments~

the days throughout the next few weeks blur together in a haze of carefully curated social media posts and staged interactions. every picture, every story, every comment feels like a chess move, calculated for the public eye. 

by now, the world has accepted the narrative—lauren james and y/n l/n, england’s newest power couple.

behind the scenes, it’s a different story entirely. you and lauren barely talk, only exchanging the occasional text when coordinating your next “public moment.” it’s efficient, professional even, but cold. 

you can’t help but feel the growing weight of the disconnect between the facade you show the world and the reality of your relationship. or lack thereof.

yet, something about lauren lingers in your mind. she’s kind in the brief moments you’ve interacted—genuine, with a subtle humor that catches you off guard. you’ve noticed how her quiet demeanor shifts when she’s irritated, her sharp gaze and tense shoulders mirroring your own tells when you’re frustrated. 

it’s a trait that feels too familiar, like looking into a mirror.

sitting on your couch late one evening, your phone in hand, you scroll mindlessly through instagram. you pause looking at the instagram story you posted with lauren, staring at the image, at the way lauren’s hand rests casually on your back in the mirror picture. you’d both laughed during that shoot. the memory stirs something in your chest—a quiet ache you can’t quite place.

she’s fascinating in a way you didn’t expect. it’s not just her talent on the pitch or her rising fame; it’s the little things. the way her smile softens when she’s genuinely amused. the thoughtful pauses she takes before she speaks. the way she seems to carry a quiet confidence, even in the chaos of the public’s attention. 

you shake your head, exhaling sharply. this is ridiculous, you tell yourself. the truth is, you want to know her… the real her, not the polished version you’ve pieced together through brief interactions and online impressions. 

you open your messages, your thumb hovering over her name. for a moment, you consider texting her something—anything—to start a conversation. however, the thought of overstepping, of complicating an already convoluted situation, keeps you frozen. 

with a sigh, you lock your phone and toss it onto the couch beside you.

whatever this is, whatever it could be, will have to wait. for now, you’ll stick to the plan, no matter how much your thoughts keep drifting back to lauren.

y/n.l/n

{tagged: lj10}

liked by lj10, lucybronze, and 211,746 others

y/n.l/n good evening

view comments

❤️ *liked by author*

lj10 good evening 😍😍

lucybronze its 11:09am..

y/n.l/n again, good evening lucy bronze

lucybronze good evening ig 😒

catarina_macario 🤩

random2728 lj and y/n having a private but not secret relationship 🥰

user72929 LOVE

random2728 there's something off about this..

random10989 wym?

leahwilliamsonn 😍

~view all 4,290 comments~

the bar is calming, music thrumming in the background as laughter and chatter fill the air. the dim lighting casts a warm glow over the group, everyone mingling and sipping on their drinks. 

you’re perched on a stool near the bar, glancing occasionally at lauren, who’s leaning against the counter, chatting easily with one of her teammates, millie. she looks relaxed, her posture casual, but there’s something about the way her eyes flick to you every so often that has your stomach in knots.

“another drink?” her voice cuts through the noise, her tone light but carrying just enough warmth to catch your attention.

you look up at her, a slight smile tugging at your lips.

“are you trying to get me drunk, lauren?”

she smirks, handing you the glass. 

“maybe. or maybe i just want to make sure you’re having a good time.”

you take a sip, feeling the burn of the alcohol mixed with something sweeter—the way she’s looking at you. 

“thanks,” you murmur. 

“but i can return the favor. what are you drinking?”

“water,” she says simply, holding up her glass. 

“staying hydrated.”

you tilt your head, studying her. 

“water? not even one drink? you’re playing it too safe.”

she shrugs, a playful glint in her eyes. 

“someone has to keep an eye on you.”

you laugh, the sound escaping before you can stop it. 

“oh, so now you’re my babysitter?”

“if that’s what you need,” she fires back smoothly, her grin widening.

there’s a moment, a charged pause, where the noise of the bar seems to fade into the background. lauren’s gaze lingers on you, and you feel your cheeks heat under the intensity of it. 

you lean in slightly, emboldened by the drinks and the energy between you.

“careful,” you tease, your voice dropping just enough to match the tension. 

“someone might think you actually care.”

“and what if i do?” she counters, her tone light but her eyes unreadable.

you blink, caught off guard. the banter feels easy, natural, but there’s something underneath it that feels heavier—real. you search her face for a clue, but she keeps her expression steady, a flicker of amusement playing at the corners of her mouth.

“then i’d say you’re doing a great job convincing everyone here,” you say finally, trying to match her confidence, even as your heart races.

her lips curve into a smirk. 

“convincing you, too?”

your breath catches, and for a split second, you don’t know what to say. she watches you, her expression calm but undeniably smug, as though she knows exactly the effect she’s having on you.

“maybe,” you admit, keeping your voice steady despite the way your pulse thunders in your ears.

she chuckles softly, the sound low and intimate, and it leaves you feeling both flustered and unmoored. then, as if sensing the moment tipping into something too real, she pulls back slightly, raising her glass of water in a mock toast.

“to good acting,” she says, her voice light but her eyes holding yours a beat too long.

you clink your glass against hers, your stomach twisting as you try to discern whether she’s teasing or deflecting. 

as the night wears on, you can’t shake the way her words, her gaze, her presence—all of it—lingers in the back of your mind. was it an act? or was there something more beneath the surface? you don’t know, and the uncertainty gets at you in a way you didn’t expect.

your drink—something sweet and forgettable—sits untouched in front of you, the condensation pooling around the glass on the counter. the room feels alive as you watch your surroundings again, as lauren’s teammates and your friends fill the dance floor, laughing, swaying to the music, completely at ease. 

you, however, feel like a misplaced puzzle piece.

you’re here for a purpose, after all—not to let loose, but to be seen. you and lauren were both instructed to attend, to sit in proximity long enough for someone to notice, snap a photo, and post it online. the public needed to see the happy “couple” out and about, living their seemingly charmed lives. 

that was the plan. it always is. however, something about tonight feels off.. or maybe it’s you that feels off. 

your eyes drift to lauren, who’s sitting a few stools away at this point, talking to sjoeke. lauren’s body language is relaxed, her posture casual, and she exudes that effortless charm you’ve come to associate with her. her laugh carries over the music, soft but genuine, and it’s disarming. 

you’ve seen her in a dozen different settings by now—on the pitch, in interviews, even in those staged photoshoots your teams made you do together—but she always carries the same quiet confidence. 

“why do i care so much about her flirting earlier?” the thought hits you suddenly, and you blink, startled by your own realization. you know you shouldn’t care. it’s not like there’s anything real between you two. this is business, nothing more. 

you’re about to take a sip of your drink when movement catches your eye. a brunette woman, her steps uneven and her smile a little too wide, weaves her way through the crowd and makes a beeline for lauren. 

she stops next to her, leaning on the counter for balance before sliding onto the stool beside her. 

at first, you think nothing of it. people approach lauren all the time; it comes with the territory of her being a footballer.. then you notice the way the woman leans in, her body language screaming flirtation. 

even over the music, you catch snippets of her words. 

“i’ve been watching you all night,” the brunette says, her voice slurred but still clear enough to make your chest tighten. 

you force yourself to look away, focusing instead on the condensation trailing down your glass. but your attention snaps back when you hear lauren laugh—a soft, polite chuckle that quickly morphs into something warmer. she’s flirting back. 

it’s subtle, nothing overt, but it’s enough to make your stomach churn.

you grip the edge of your stool, willing yourself to stay calm. this doesn’t matter, you tell yourself. this isn’t real. lauren is a footballer—a brilliant, talented, and undeniably attractive one. of course people are drawn to her. of course she’s going to flirt back.

you remind yourself that you’re just the one her pr team picked for this charade. nothing more. 

the tightness in your chest refuses to go away. watching lauren lean in closer to the brunette, her smile softening, feels like a punch to the gut and worse, it makes you question things you don’t want to question. 

like why you even care in the first place.

the noise of the bar feels suffocating, and before you know it, you’re sliding off the stool and heading toward the bathroom. the music dulls as you push through the door, and the quieter space is a welcome reprieve.

then, your eyes land on zion and amber. 

your two friends are tucked into a corner of the bathroom, lost in their own world. amber’s hands are tangled in zion’s hair, and zion’s lips are pressed firmly against amber’s. they don’t even notice you until the door clicks shut behind you. 

zion pulls back first, her face flushed. “y/n?” she asks, stepping forward. 

“you okay?”

you hesitate, the weight of the night pressing heavily on your chest. you don’t want to talk about it, but the lump in your throat makes it clear that you need to. 

“not really,” you admit, your voice quieter than you intended.

amber straightens, exchanging a quick glance with zion before walking over to you. 

“what’s going on?” she asks, concern evident in her tone.

just like that, everything comes pouring out. the fake relationship, the constant public scrutiny, the pressure to perform for an audience you didn’t ask for. you tell them about the brunette at the bar, how lauren flirted back, and how much it hurt even though it shouldn’t have. when you’re done, you feel a little lighter, but the knot in your chest remains.

zion crosses her arms, her brow furrowed in thought. 

“y/n,” she says carefully, “are you… catching feelings for lauren?”

the question hangs in the air, heavy and uncomfortable. your first instinct is to deny it, to brush it off as ridiculous. but the truth gnaws at you, undeniable and unrelenting. you don’t say anything, which is answer enough.

amber steps closer, placing a hand on your arm. “look,” she says gently, “you need to figure this out. either you tell her how you feel and end this whole fake thing, or you set some serious boundaries before you get hurt.”

you nod slowly, the reality of her words settling over you like a weight. “yeah,” you murmur. 

“you’re right.”

as you stand there, staring at your reflection in the bathroom mirror, the question lingers in your mind. 

how did i even let this happen?

the days pass in a haze of avoidance and overthinking. 

you bury yourself in work, content for tiktok, and anything else that keeps you busy enough to ignore the fluttering in your chest every time you think of lauren. it’s not hard to avoid her; after all, your only real interactions have been the orchestrated ones... lunches, coffee dates, the occasional walk in the park, all designed to feed the narrative. 

without the need for those, you manage to keep your distance.

your phone buzzes occasionally with texts from lauren. nothing accusatory or probing, just polite questions about when your next outing is or casual jokes about how your pr teams must be getting impatient about when the next outing will be. 

each message makes your stomach twist, the guilt poking at you. she doesn’t deserve to be avoided, but you can’t bring yourself to face her right now.

the bathroom conversation at the bar replays in your head on a loop. amber’s words, “set boundaries or tell her how you feel,” echo louder with each passing day. it feels like you’ve done neither, stuck somewhere in limbo, unsure of what to do. 

all you know is that seeing lauren flirt with someone else hurt more than it should have. and now, it’s painfully clear why.

you caught feelings. 

the realization had hit you like a train that night, leaving you panicked. you’ve spent years building walls around yourself, keeping relationships at arm’s length, unwilling to let anyone in after your last heartbreak. yet here you are, feelings growing for someone who isn’t even truly yours. 

lauren’s face lingers in your mind far more often than you’d like. the chelsea player’s quiet humor, her thoughtfulness, the way her smile lights up when she’s genuinely happy.. it’s all etched into your brain, no matter how much you try to push it away. 

the worst part? you know this is going nowhere. fake relationships don’t magically become real, and even if they did, there’s no guarantee lauren feels the same.

you sit on your couch, scrolling absentmindedly through your phone. the notifications pile up—comments on your latest post, messages from friends, an email from your team about your next public appearance. 

you can’t bring yourself to focus on any of it. all you can think about is how scared you are that you’ve made a mistake, one that’s far too late to undo.

hours later.. around midnight.. you’re curled up on your couch, a soft blanket draped over your legs as you dig into a bowl of rice and chicken. the dim glow of the tv lights up the room, the suspenseful soundtrack of squid game filling the air. 

it’s the perfect distraction, engrossing enough to keep your thoughts at bay, even if just for a little while.

then, a faint knock interrupts the quiet. at first, you assume it’s coming from the show, but when it happens again, you freeze. your eyes flick to the door. you weren’t expecting anyone, and frankly, you’ve been avoiding everyone for the last few days. 

the knocking persists, steady and deliberate, until you reluctantly pause the show and get up.

your heart races as you peek through the peephole. the sight of lauren standing there, hands shoved into the pockets of her hoodie, sends your mind spiraling. 

what is she doing here? how did she get my address?

you open the door slowly, your confusion evident. 

“lauren?” you ask, your voice wary. 

“what are you doing here? how did you even know where i live?”

she offers a small smile, almost sheepish. 

“hey. i asked madeline. hope that’s okay.”

you step aside, letting her in despite your confusion at why she would go so far to ask your mutual friend what your address was. lauren looks around, her eyes landing on the paused screen of squid game. 

“season two?” she asks, nodding toward the tv. 

“is it any good? haven’t had the chance to watch it yet because of training.”

“so far, yeah,” you reply, your tone cautious. 

“like the first season. but… why are you here?”

she turns to face you, her expression soft but serious. 

“i came to talk to you. you’ve been avoiding everyone.. me included.. and it’s not like you. i just want to make sure you’re okay.”

you try to brush it off, waving a hand dismissively. 

“i’m fine. just needed some space, that’s all.”

lauren doesn’t budge. she crosses her arms, tilting her head slightly. 

“come on, y/n. i know something’s wrong. you can’t just disappear like that and expect no one to notice.”

you let out a dry laugh, shaking your head. 

“what does it matter? you probably have a real date to get to or something.”

she frowns, her brows knitting together. 

“what are you talking about? i don’t have a real date. why would you say that?”

your heart pounds in your chest, but you push forward, your voice tinged with frustration. 

“do you have a real partner, lauren? someone you’re seeing while we’re doing this… this fake thing?”

lauren’s confusion deepens. 

“what? no. where is this even coming from?”

the tension boils over, and before you can stop yourself, the words spill out. 

“because it’s driving me insane, lauren! this whole fake relationship thing.. it’s messing with my head. i can’t stop thinking about you, and it’s not just for the cameras or the public or whatever. i caught feelings, okay? within these few months of pretending to be your girlfriend, i somehow…. god, i don’t even know. i like you and i know that’s not part of the plan, so if this makes things too complicated, we can stop. i get it.”

the room goes quiet, your words hanging heavily in the air. lauren’s eyes widen, and for a moment, you brace yourself for rejection. but then her expression shifts… softening into something that looks like relief.

“wait,” she says, stepping closer. 

“are you serious?”

you nod, your heart in your throat. 

“yeah. and if that’s too much, just say the word, and we can call this off. i’ll tell the pr team about the situation myself.”

lauren shakes her head quickly. “no, no. you’re not calling anything off.” her voice is steady, her gaze locked onto yours. 

“if we’re going to stop the fake relationship, it’s only because we’re starting a real one.”

your brows knit together, confusion washing over you. 

“what are you saying?”

she takes a breath, her lips curving into a small, genuine smile. 

“i’m saying that i’ve caught feelings too. you’re kind, funny, and beautiful.. completely yourself no matter the situation. you’re the kind of person who i love spending my time with, even for something as ridiculous as a fake relationship, this has been the best part of my year.”

you stare at her, your brain struggling to catch up. 

“you… like me?”

“yeah,” she says, her smile widening. 

“i like you, y/n. for real, nothing fake.”

the tension in your chest finally loosens, replaced by something warm and overwhelming. 

“so, what do we do now?”

lauren grins, her expression brighter than you’ve ever seen it. 

“first, i’m calling the pr team and telling them we’re done with this fake stuff. after that, we’ll figure it out. together.”

you let out a breathy laugh, relief washing over you. 

“okay. yeah. let’s do that.”

she glances at the tv, her grin turning playful. 

“before that, can we watch the rest of this? i’ve been meaning to start season two.”

you laugh, gesturing to the couch. 

“sure, but you’re sharing my blanket.”

lauren plops down beside you, pulling the blanket over her legs as the two of you settle in. for the first time in weeks, everything feels right.

also real.. 

masterlist

happy very early birthday aj 😆

[armory-rasa]

COUCH POUCH!! Free Pattern & Tutorial

...called thus because they use upholstery-weight leather for the bag body, that in my case was in fact skinned off a couch. 🤣 Turns out they are relatively quick and easy to make, so I tidied up the pattern for printing and took pictures to document the process when I made another five of them.

First off, print your pattern, 100% scale:

The bag shape was a modified version of the pattern I used for the Morpheus sandbag, but sized to fit in the roughly 11" squares that my couch skin came in. It makes a bag that sits very well on a tabletop, thanks to the flat base.

Though it turned out to not be the most efficient use of material, because that plus-shaped pattern tessellates well, if you're cutting them out of a full hide, but makes a lot of waste when you're cutting them out of squares of material. A more efficient design would have a half-rounded front and back, and a gusset between them, like so:

Ah well. It's not like I have any shortage of couch skin, though for the next round I'm going to experiment with a more efficient pattern.

First step, trace and cut out the bag body from your chrome-tan leather:

Like I said, this was upholstery leather, but anything that's flexible and ~1.5 mm thick will do.

The flap and front need to be a stiffer leather though -- I used 7 oz latigo, but veg-tan would work equally well. (And then you could ✨tool it!✨)

Cut them out, and then use the pattern to mark where your holes are going to be. Mark the holes on your bag body too:

The latigo pieces get hand-stitched to the bag body, so I used a stitching groover to carve out little channels for the thread -- it's not strictly necessary, but it makes your stitches lay a lot more neatly:

Punch the holes shown below:

I used a ~5 mm hole punch for those, and a 1.5" slot punch for the belt loops. Some of the holes on the front piece you're not punching yet, because they need to go through both layers.

I put a dab of contact cement on the pieces (circled in white) to help hold them in place when I go to punch the stitching holes:

(Make sure you're not putting glue between the belt loops)

Wait fifteen minutes for the contact cement to dry until tacky, and then line up the holes and the edges and press the pieces together:

Punch stitching holes:

Saddle-stitch both pieces in place (takes 28" of thread per):

Now you can punch these holes:

(I used a slightly smaller hole punch than for the others, but it doesn't really matter.)

Now press the right sides of the leather together and sew up the seams from the inside:

A regular sewing machine should be able to handle this, though you will need thicker thread, a heavy-duty leather-sewing needle, and a walking foot attachment. (If you don't have a walking foot attachment, it is SO WORTH getting one, even if you don't expect to sew much leather. Seriously, I use it for everything -- once you go walking foot, you don't go back. 💀) Because you can't pin leather without leaving permanent holes in it, tiny binder clips can be helpful for keeping your material lined up.

What they look like when you're finished sewing:

Cut 19" of lacing for the drawstring, and 11" of lacing for the toggle:

I use the 1/8" EcoSoft lace from Tandy, I think it's stronger than real leather would be at that thickness. The only important factor here is that you need something with a bit of texture and friction -- a silk cord isn't going to stay closed, it's going to slip open.

MANY BAGS.

For these I used a wooden toggle -- cut another 8" of lacing, looped it through the toggle twice, and then made a tight square knot on the back:

But another option is putting a concho or a large button on the flap. The bag I copied this design from, in fact, uses a concho toggle:

Thread some beads on the laces to keep the ends from getting lost, and you are DONE! 😁

Happy Bagging!

[ldydeath]

I Used to Believe In You | Kwon Ji-yong (G-Dragon)

Summary: You and Jiyong have been in a relationship for years, but it’s always been toxic. Once you realize that you have to decide if staying together is worth it. Warnings: Language, mentions of alcohol and alcohol use.

Author’s Note: This was requested and I hope I did you proud! My requests are open, please feel free to send them in anytime!

You’d awoken with a start, the front door slamming shut. You sat up in bed and saw Jiyong shrug off his jacket. He was drunk, you didn’t have to see him up close to know. His hair a mess, his appearance indicating another altercation. You peeped at the clock on the nightstand, it was five in the morning. You’d gone back to his apartment hours ago. With a sigh, you flipped on the light causing him to shield his eyes.

“What the hell!” He slurred making his way into the room. 

“You’re drunk.” You folded your arms across your chest, leaning back against the headboard.

“So? We were at a party.” 

You couldn’t remember when it had gotten this way. Perhaps it had been this way from the start. You’d ignored it for as long as you could, you loved Jiyong. You knew he loved you too. You didn’t want to believe that you two were toxic. Every night it seemed to get worse. Either he was coming home drunk or not coming home at all. Not that you were much better.

You two both lived life in the spotlight, living large and fast. Too fast to ever come down long enough to realize just how fucked up everything has gotten for you. You’d always figured that was just the trade off to being a pop star. You just wished you’d known sooner that the two of you getting together would end up being so unhealthy. 

“Yeah.” You scoffed, moving to get out of the bed.

“Don’t do that. Don’t act like you’re better than me because you left early.”  He moved to walk over to you, but stumbled and stayed put. 

“I’m not acting better than you, Jiyong.” You shook your head, sliding into the jeans you’d worn over here from the party. 

“Well good. Because you’re not, you know. Last week this would’ve been you coming home drunk off your ass. So you’re just as fucked up as I am.” 

You couldn’t stay here, not tonight. You had a long list of things to get done in a few short hours and if you stayed here you’d end up fighting, causing your makeup artists to do double work on covering up the dark circles. His eyes followed you as you gathered up your things.

“Where are you going?” You shot him a look as you made your way to the door. “My hotel. I have to work tomorrow.” You left before he could argue further.

Jiyong yelled out of frustration before collapsing onto the bed. He knew he was messing up right now but he couldn’t care enough about himself to fix it. Six months ago if you’d stormed out of here he would’ve chased after you, but tonight he’d just stay here alone. If you didn’t want to be with him he wouldn’t make you stay. Fuck it.  He reached for his phone with the intent to text to make sure you made it to whatever hotel you were supposed to be staying at, but as he reached for it, he closed his eyes, falling fast asleep.

You weren’t sure what you’d been expecting when you left in the early morning hours, but it hadn’t been radio silence. You glanced at your phone during a press break and let out a sigh. Still nothing from Jiyong. You had one more interview left to go about your new album that would be launching at midnight. Jiyong was supposed to go to the launch party with you but now you weren’t sure you wanted him there. 

The party was in full swing by the time you showed up and you took a second to look around, see who all was there. The usual faces, all of Jiyongs friends and bandmates were there as well as all your friends. The drinks were flowing and you happily accepted one from your management team as you made your way into the party.

“There she is” Jiyong beamed, walking up to you as if the events of this morning hadn't happened, planting a soft kiss on your cheek. 

“Hi.” You grinned as you pulled him into a hug, melting into his touch.

 This was the problem with your relationship, as angry as he made you he also made you feel at home when you were with him. 

“The album is  amazing, I’m so proud of you.” He grabbed your arm, pulling you further into the crowd of people.

He’d meant every word of what he’d said, of course he did. Your talent has always amazed him.  That’s what had originally drawn him to you, and as he got to know you he’d realized how amazing everything about you was. 

“Why didn’t you call me?” You hadn’t planned on asking him, but you didn’t have it in you to pretend tonight. 

“What?” His jaw ticked as he moved to take a step back from you. 

“You didn’t even bother to check in today. What if I didn’t want you here?” You downed your drink, eyes searching for another. 

He watched you as you plucked a drink off the nearby tray and let out a low laugh. You’d just yelled at him for this very behavior the night before. Why was it ever only okay when you did it? 

“Why wouldn’t you want me here?” He scoffed as he followed your lead to grab a drink for himself. 

“Not anymore I don’t. I don’t even want to date you anymore.” The words left your lips before you could stop them.  Jiyong looked at you wide eyed, a flash of hurt crossing his face before he covered it with anger. 

“Fine.” His voice was like ice as he turned in his heel and left the party.

There was a part of you that wanted to run after him, tell him you were lying, beg him to stay. The bigger part of you won though, and you spent the rest of the night trying to avoid anyone who might ask questions. Surely they had to see how toxic you two had gotten. Maybe now at least you’d be able to heal. 

——— ——— ———

A few months after the breakup, you dropped a surprise song. That had definitely surprised Jiyong. He’d been keeping tabs on you, trying to find a way to get you back. His nights were spent alone, or at a club, picking fights with anyone he could get his hands on. His friends pulling him away before he could throw a punch. He’d spent the last month trying to better himself though. He’d have to grow up eventually, even if he didn’t want to. 

After your song had come out, he’d realized just how bad things had been with you two. It was harder to see it back then, because he didn’t want to. He’d loved you too much to admit that not being together was the best thing for you both. He was certain though that he wanted you back, and that’s how he’d ended up on your doorstep. Just as he was about to knock, the door swung open and there you were. Wide eyed and gorgeous. 

“Jiyong? What are you doing here?” He was definitely the last person you ever expected to see here.

“I heard the song.” 

“Oh.” You bit down on your lip. “Do you want to come in?” 

He nodded, following you inside. How long had it been since he’d been here? You were always flying to him. No wonder you’d always fought. He hadn’t realized how thin you’d been pulled for all those years. Jiyong was going to do better. He was. 

“I’m sorry. I never meant for our relationship to go the way that it had.” He sighed, sitting down next to you. 

“Neither did I. But it wasn’t all on you, Jiyong.” You turned to look at him. “We’re so young, it’s ridiculous to think we’re not gonna make mistakes from time to time.”  He nodded, his eyes not quite meeting yours. 

“You think there’s a world in which this ever works?” He looked up at you briefly, hope filling his eyes. 

“No. I really don’t.” His eyes snapped shut, hiding the hurt flooding in. He should’ve expected that. “Ji, I don’t mean it harshly, I just want better for me and for you.”  He nodded, standing up. He couldn’t stay here. 

“I get it.” He smirked at you trying to hide the hurt. “Take care of yourself, okay?” He turned on his heel. 

“Ji. Wait.” You grabbed his arm, turning him around to face you. 

You glanced at him briefly before placing your lips were on his, giving him a soft, gentle kiss. A goodbye kiss, something you should’ve done at the party. His arms wrapped around you, holding you tightly for a few more moments. 

He didn’t say another word as he let you go and walked out of the house, neither did you. You watched from the door as he got back in his car and sped off. You two really had been toxic until the end. Maybe now you could both heal.

tag list: @wcnderlnds @alosss-blog @sooyasya @dprvivi @infinetlyforgotten @mirahyun @loveesiren

[musemeadow]

pic;

what inevitable change awaits you?

please choose what pulls you in and remember, nothing in life is permanent. trust in yourself and your judgement before all else ౨ৎ

⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂ ⠂⠄⠄⠂⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂☆

pile 1;

on the surface, everything may seem to continue as normal, but deep down, you’ll know it isn’t the same at all. someone in your circle is worried about the path you’re moving towards–for better or for worse. there is no maliciousness in their concern. still, if you continue, this relationship will surely fall. as it falls, you will come to a grand realization about yourself and your path moving forward. it is up to you to decide between the comfort of this relationship, or your growth as an individual. here, there are no incorrect answers, only choices.

# natural change. belonging, lucid dreams, water, childhood toys

song; love, my world is full - rio ┆ colors; bistre, terracotta, baby pink

⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂ ⠂⠄⠄⠂⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂☆

pile 2;

you are stuck in limbo–a state neither here nor there. the feeling won’t go away as long as you keep doing what you’re told. once in a while, there might be a voice calling to you from beyond the horizon and it’s longing for a response. listen to it, if you wish, but stay cautious. they only want what's best for you, but at the end of the day, they too want your agency for themselves. you won’t find what you’re looking for externally. looking inwards, there are things in your life that feel completely unsolvable. it’ll take years to ultimately find it in your heart to leave limbo for good. rest assured, it’ll be worth it. there will be more voices like the others. which are worth listening to depends on your will.

# personal change. identity, lukewarm yet flavorful tea, air, mammatus clouds.

song; ww - other nothing ┆ colors; cream, linen, grey.

⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂ ⠂⠄⠄⠂⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂⠄⠄⠂⠁⠁⠂☆

pile 3;

change isn’t something you’d pursue naturally. you’re content with the routine you’ve set for yourself, the people you know, and the life that you lead. change will not happen to you–it will happen around you. as time passes, your relationships may not be as tight knit as they might have been. it’ll fare well to keep an eye on this delicate balance of closeness or run the risk of feeling more disconnected than ever before. your favorite people notice your distance and it upsets them. don’t worry, they will take good care of your fragile heart, as long as you let them.

#  passage of time. sincerity, out of tune piano, earth, cracked sidewalks

song; grown up - leith ross ┆ colors; claret, sepia, honey

[stardrop-sims]

so, why did I delete my old blog? The short answer is I banned yin-shimo/tianshi88 from my now defunct occult simblr server and his friends proceeded to spin a narrative on tumblr that was false. In the moment it was not worth it to me fight back, but I am back and I am fighting for what I think is right–sharing what happened and why we chose to ban him in the first place. 

If you want the full details, I am going to lay it out under the cut but bare with me, I have never had to defend myself like this, and never thought I would. You can view this as drama or whatever, idc. I just want to say my peace and not have to think nor talk about this ever again.

Also, do not harass the mods if you know who they were. Do not harass anyone shown in the screenshots, they are only shown here for transparency sake. 

cw: homophobic rhetoric, harassment, sexualization of a minor mention

A few months ago I made the occult simblr, baby! discord server. It was public so anyone could join and there was no way for me to guess how many people would end up joining! (Almost 80!) I am thankful for the learning experience but it ended on a sour note. 

One of the users who joined goes by tianshi88/yin-shimo, a known cc creator in occult simmer circles, but to be frank, I was completely unaware of this person until yin-shimo joined my server and occasionally talked.

Some time goes by, and one of the mods suggests we create a server blog to reblog our users’ content! I say yes. It was a good idea, but an anonymous ask came in (screenshot below). This is where things go south. I made the call to reply publicly, which I regret, but only because a few people made it way more trouble than what it was worth.

So let's talk about the claims and what we (the mod team at the time and myself) found out—the initial post by yooniesim (link to his post about it, which he gave me permission to link here!) The allegation is about sexualization of a fictionalized minor in the anime/manga Blue Lock. Yin-shimo himself claims this pose is done by the character in the media itself. The character in question is a teenager. I hate that I am explaining this here but ahegao is essentially a sexual pose from hentai (anime porn). It is my opinion that media portrayal of this kind of thing is weird at best, dangerous at worst. The fact that it is a reference to it is a problem in of itself, but ultimately we decided this behavior was weird (as well as his actions following the initial callout about it) and it was best to remove him from the server and we made a brief statement in the server given the circumstances surrounding it. I do not have the screenshot for this server announcement nor our reply, but nowhere did in the original ask nor in the replies we made as mods, did anyone call him a pedophile. We stated “sexualized a fictional character” because that’s what it was. 

However, worth noting there are other things he has done, which imo are worse than what I am detailing here, as referenced in Yoonie’s linked post, that added to the decision to ban him, which can be triggering to read about, so fair warning! 

The next day I considered deleting the ask of the blog to not create drama out of something serious, but I didn't before I received a reply from puppycheesecake.

I do not have the screenshot but they essentially accused us of framing him as a pedophile–this is where I became aware of yin-shimo’s sexuality/pronouns for the first time and said we were participating in a witch hunt of a gay man started by “one person” ( the anon).

My response was to delete the ask and block them. I would have responded and told them to stop lying, because that’s what they were doing. But as a queer person, being accused of that triggered me on top of everything else so I deleted the ask and the mods and I made the decision to make a second statement to tie up loose ends in the server.  We turned off anon asks on that blog, and the day after i decide to take a break, what happens?

This reblog of a shitpost on my personal blog, on a post in which I  am talking about how much I love simblr shows up in my notifications—

That was the moment I was done. You’re not going to come onto my blog with lies and try to spin a narrative when it’s very clear you are more interested in protecting your friend than what is true.

most of the mods, including me, are trans/queer, so fuck off with that “gay man is a pedophile” narrative that you’re weaponizing. 

I didn't know yin-shimo’s pronouns nor sexuality, nor did it come up when the mods and I made the decision to ban him from the server.

This behavior is childish–something like this should have never happened in an 18+ server, nor should this have turned into drama, and yet here we are. 

As for “only one person” (as referenced by puppycheesecake)—once we made the call to ban him, several people came forward to tell us his presence made them uncomfortable in the server, so I think we made the right decision in the end. 

Ultimately, yin-shimo is upset he has to face consequences for his own actions and used his friends—neither of which were in the server—to do his dirty work. 

I regret answering the question publicly but I am not sorry for banning him, nor will I apologize for what we did not do–which is what is alleged in what context I have provided. I am going to reiterate that not once did the mods call him a pedophile. 

To everyone else, it is up to you how you want to curate your online space and who you want to interact with. I am not making that decision for you, but hopefully this clears things up.

[kathlare]

tension on the field

Lando Norris x Amelie Dayman

Summary: In a charity football match at Wembley, Lando faces unexpected tension when he encounters Rodrigo, Amelie's ex.

Wordcount: 1.5 k

Warnings: none

full masterlist // request over here!

June 2nd, 2024 - London, United Kingdom

The warm June sun was casting a golden glow over Wembley Stadium as Lando arrived at the PlayStation Cup match. A private event that brought together influencers, athletes, and celebrities for a charity football game, it was the perfect blend of competition and fun. Lando had always enjoyed football—it was one of the few sports he played just for the love of it, rather than the pressure to perform. Today, though, he wasn’t just here to show off his skills. He wanted to represent himself well, to keep proving that he was more than just the boy who drove fast cars.

The stadium echoed with the sound of players chatting and laughing as Lando stepped onto the pristine pitch. It felt surreal to be at Wembley, even without the roaring crowd. He adjusted the white captain's armband PlayStation had handed him and scanned the field. A mix of famous faces mingled, some already warming up with the ball. He spotted a few people he recognized—streamers he’d gamed with, actors he admired, even some fellow athletes.

But his casual smile faltered when his eyes landed on Rodrigo Riquelme.

Rodrigo was standing near the center circle, juggling a football with effortless precision. His sharp features were illuminated by the sunlight, his confidence evident in the way he moved. Lando’s stomach twisted uncomfortably as recognition hit him. Rodrigo wasn’t just another footballer—he was him. Amelie’s ex.

Lando hadn’t known Rodrigo would be here. Nobody had mentioned it when he’d agreed to come. The irritation bubbled beneath the surface as he watched Rodrigo glance up and meet his gaze. The footballer’s smirk was immediate, like he knew exactly what Lando was thinking.

Forcing himself to stay calm, Lando gave a small nod in acknowledgment before looking away. He wasn’t going to let Rodrigo get under his skin. Not here. Not now.

As the event organizer called everyone together to go over the match rules, Lando found himself grouped with a mix of players. Rodrigo, of course, ended up on the opposing team. Lando could feel his stare from across the field, a constant, heavy presence. He tried to focus on the game instead.

But Rodrigo made it impossible.

From the very first whistle, it was clear Rodrigo was out to make a point. His tackles were just a little too hard, his comments just a little too sharp. When Rodrigo blocked one of Lando’s shots, he turned with a smug grin.

—Better luck next time, mate.—

Lando clenched his jaw but didn’t respond. It wasn’t worth it. Not yet. Instead, he focused on getting back into the game, his competitive side kicking in. If Rodrigo wanted to play dirty, fine. Lando would let his skills do the talking.

The match progressed with tension simmering between them. Lando managed to score a clean goal midway through, his teammates cheering as he jogged back to his position. Rodrigo, however, couldn’t resist a dig.

—Impressive. Guess you can aim when it’s not a steering wheel.—

Lando stopped in his tracks, turning to face Rodrigo. His voice was calm, but his eyes were cold.

—Funny. I could say the same about you, considering you couldn’t hold onto the real prize.—

Rodrigo’s smirk faltered for a split second, but he recovered quickly, stepping closer to Lando.

—And what would you know about it? You’ve been playing house for, what, six months? Amelie doesn’t belong with you. She deserves someone who understands her world, someone who can actually be there for her.—

Lando’s chest tightened, anger flaring. He took a step closer too, lowering his voice so only Rodrigo could hear.

—You can say whatever you want, mate, but at the end of the day, I’m still the name she moans every night.—

The words hit their mark. Rodrigo’s face darkened, his hands balling into fists.

—You little shit—

Rodrigo lunged, but one of the event organizers quickly stepped in, grabbing his arm before he could throw a punch.

—Hey! Enough! This is supposed to be for charity, not a bloody boxing match.—

Rodrigo yanked his arm free but didn’t make another move. His glare could have set Lando on fire.

Lando, on the other hand, stood his ground, his expression cool and defiant.

—You can try to intimidate me all you want, Rodrigo, but it’s not going to change anything. She’s with me. And I’m not going anywhere.—

Rodrigo muttered something under his breath but didn’t reply. Instead, he turned and walked away, leaving Lando standing in the middle of the field, his heart pounding in his chest.

Lando took a deep breath, trying to steady himself. His mind was still racing with the adrenaline from the confrontation with Rodrigo. It wasn’t just the words that stung, it was the idea that someone—someone who had been with Amelie—thought they had the right to say anything about their relationship. About her. He hated that Rodrigo thought he could just walk back into her life, that he could tear her away from him after everything they had been through.

As the match resumed, Lando did his best to focus on the game, but his mind kept drifting back to the argument. Rodrigo’s words echoed in his head, fueling the fire in his gut. But he couldn’t let it distract him. Not when there was still a game to win.

After another thirty minutes, the match finally ended, with Lando’s team emerging victorious. It wasn’t just the win that made him feel good, though; it was the way he played. He could hold his head high, knowing he’d shown his skill and focus, no matter how much Rodrigo had tried to get in his head.

But when the match ended, Lando’s focus shifted back to the tension that still lingered in the air. Rodrigo hadn’t made another move after their confrontation, but Lando could feel his eyes on him from across the field. The tension was palpable, and Lando wasn’t sure what was worse: the thought of having to keep his cool around Rodrigo or the fact that he still felt like he hadn’t finished what they’d started.

As the event came to a close, the heat of the day still lingering in the air, Lando tried to shake off the lingering tension that had consumed his thoughts ever since the confrontation with Rodrigo. He couldn’t help but feel the weight of the argument gnawing at him, even though they’d managed to keep it from escalating any further. The idea that someone like Rodrigo could just show up and start throwing accusations about his relationship with Amelie was maddening. The nerve of him.

He was walking towards the locker room when he saw Rodrigo again, standing alone by the sidelines, glaring in his direction. The dark-haired footballer’s expression was a mix of frustration and barely contained fury, still seething from the exchange earlier. His jaw clenched with every glance he stole towards Lando, but this time, Lando didn’t flinch. He was tired of this game, of playing nice. If Rodrigo wanted to keep throwing punches—whether physical or verbal—he was more than ready.

Taking a deep breath, Lando closed the distance, his steps purposeful.

—What’s your deal, Riquelme?— he called, his tone cool but with an edge of challenge.

Rodrigo's eyes snapped to Lando's, narrowing. His nostrils flared slightly, as though he was holding something back.

—You think you’re some sort of hero for her, don’t you?— Rodrigo shot back, his voice tight with bitterness. —Like you’re the one she’s always dreamed of. But you don’t deserve her. You don’t even get her, Lando. Not like I did.—

Lando rolled his eyes, suppressing a chuckle that would’ve only served to piss off Rodrigo even more.

—Deserve her? Really?— Lando asked, tilting his head slightly. —Funny. I’ve been here for her through the thick and thin, you know, all the ups and downs. And yet, I’m the one you think doesn’t deserve her?—

Rodrigo scoffed, taking a step closer, his chest puffing up. He looked Lando dead in the eye, his voice low and dangerous.

—She deserves someone who can actually be there for her. Someone who doesn’t treat her like a casual fling. You didn’t even have the decency to stick around when things got tough. You left her, Lando. You left her like everyone else. But I... I stayed. I cared.—

Lando felt the blood rush to his head at the mention of leaving Amelie. He could feel the familiar mix of rage and frustration, that same knot of guilt that had haunted him when he let things go sour between them years ago. He hated being reminded of that period, hated how things had ended before they’d had a chance to be what they were supposed to be. But he wasn’t going to let Rodrigo twist the narrative.

—And how did that turn out for you, huh?— Lando shot back, his voice low but biting. —Because last time I checked, you were the one who couldn’t make it work. You were the one who couldn’t handle the distance. And you think you get to tell me I don’t deserve her?—

Rodrigo opened his mouth to retort, but Lando didn’t give him the chance. He was done being diplomatic, done with the quiet simmering of resentment that had been building ever since Rodrigo’s presence had tainted the day.

Lando stepped closer, his eyes narrowing in on Rodrigo's. His breath was shallow, the heat of the argument settling in his chest. He didn’t want to be here, didn’t want to be having this conversation, but he also wasn’t going to back down. Not now.

—Look, mate,— Lando began, his voice cutting through the tension. —I’m not perfect. I’ve made my mistakes. I’ve fucked up, but I’ve also been the one to put in the effort. I’ve been there for her in ways you wouldn’t even understand. And the way you’re talking, like you’ve got some ownership over her? That’s not how this works. You don’t get to come in here and rewrite history just because you think you’ve got some claim to her, especially when it’s obvious you’re still bitter about how things ended. You don’t get to talk to me about what Amelie deserves.—

Rodrigo’s nostrils flared, his face turning a shade darker. He opened his mouth to respond, but Lando cut him off, his voice raising slightly.

—And don’t think I don’t know why you’re so pissed. You can’t handle the fact that she’s moved on. You think you’re the only one who could give her what she wanted. But newsflash: you couldn’t. And I’m sorry, but that’s just the truth.—

Rodrigo sneered, stepping closer now, his gaze locked on Lando’s. His voice dropped to a harsh whisper, as if he was trying to contain the storm building inside him.

—And you think she’ll stay with you forever? What happens when it gets tough? When her career takes her away again? Will you still be there, or will you run off like last time?— His words were a challenge, as if testing Lando’s commitment.

Lando didn’t flinch. He stood his ground, his chest rising and falling with each breath, the tension in his body palpable.

—I’m not going anywhere, Rodrigo.— His voice was firm, unwavering. —I’ll be there. I’ll always be there, no matter what. And she knows that. You’re right about one thing, though. This isn’t easy. But we don’t run when it gets tough. That’s not what we do. That’s not who I am. And that’s certainly not who Amelie is.—

Rodrigo’s eyes flashed with anger at Lando’s unwavering confidence. He opened his mouth, but Lando didn’t give him the chance to speak.

—No, you don’t get to finish that sentence, Rodrigo.— Lando’s words were sharp, cutting him off mid-sentence. —I’m done with this. I’m not here to relive your drama. I’m not going to sit here and let you talk shit about her or me. So you can take your bitterness somewhere else. I’m not interested in whatever you have to say anymore.—

For a split second, Rodrigo looked as if he was about to snap. His hand twitched toward Lando, but it was like something clicked inside him, and instead of swinging, he clenched his fists so tightly his knuckles turned white.

Lando turned on his heel, walking away without another word, his heart still racing, but now with the satisfaction of having finally stood up for Amelie. The tension still hung in the air like a storm waiting to break, but Lando refused to let it consume him. He had won this round—he’d made his point, and he wasn’t about to let Rodrigo or anyone else undermine his relationship with Amelie.

As he walked towards the locker room, his thoughts briefly turned to her. He couldn’t help but smile as he imagined her face—how she’d laugh at his fiery words and the way he’d stood his ground. She’d always had a way of grounding him, even when he felt his temper flaring. And despite everything that had happened today, despite Rodrigo’s unwelcome presence, Lando was more certain than ever about his place in her life.

[fandomtherapy44]

Valentine's Day: Satoru Gojo x Fem! reader

Paring: Satoru Gojo x Fem! Virgin! Reader

Warnings: SMUT, language

Paring: Satoru Gojo x Fem! Virgin! Reader

Reblog Banner and 18+ Banner

and divider

cafekitsune

CW: 2,614

Summary: Satoru and y/n have been together for a few months, and Valentine's Day is right around the corner. And she has no idea what to get him? So she talks to a friend of his to get the info.

Cars pass by with the window that I opened to air out my apartment as I cooked dinner. The fresh aroma of Sukiyaki was in a big pot on the stove. I put the rice in the steamer and sighed. The last few days of work have been brutal, so many different curses have been popping up like daisies. In places that don’t usually or shouldn't have that much curse energy coursing through them. So Gojo and I have been running all over the place, not really having time to be together. And I thought that I would surprise him with a nice meal, not out of a convenience store. He should be here any minute since I texted him thirty minutes ago. DING DOUG. And there he is! I go to open my door, and he’s standing there all sexy-like. He was wearing some black slacks and a long white button-up sleeve, with the first three open revealing just the right amount of his toned chest, leaving you wanting more. His white hair tousled naturally from going about his day. His black rounded sunglasses hide his baby blues. Man, my boyfriend is sexy as hell!

“Hey Baby I missed you~” He tells me in his signature husky voice that makes me weak in the knees. I snap out of my little head cloud.

“Me too, I have a surprise for you!” I take his warm hand and lead him in. To my food.

“Oh babe you didn’t have to.” He brought me in for a side hug.

“I know but I thought we both deserved it for the past days we've had.” 

“Man, I can’t wait to brag to Geto about this!” He gleamed sitting down.

“Gojo!” I scolded him for teasing his best friend.

“Okay, fine I won’t… maybe~” He gives me his smirk and we get to eat.

With our bellies full and relaxed we sit down to watch a little TV before Gojo has to go.

“Thank you Y/n that was delicious and definitely worth the hard work for the last few days.” I turn my head to look at him.

“You're welcome Gojo.”

“You know I wish you would use my first name, we are together.” I know he has a point and that it is totally normal and he even uses my first name. It’s just my younger self won’t let me.

“I’m just used to calling you Gojo, but I’ll work on it.” He tilts to meet my eyes and leans in close to my face.

“That’s my girl~” He whispers and leans down and kisses me. He pushes me back on the couch and his tongue asks for entrance I let him in. A lingering sweet taste was between us from the boba we drank earlier. His hand lightly goes down to my ass and grabs it.

“Mhh Gojo” I moaned in his mouth, we came apart his hand traveled in between my thighs and his lips went to my neck. “Wait stop.” He does. “I’m sorry-”

He grabs my hand and places small circles on the back of it. “Don’t be sorry, it’s okay Y/n. I can wait as long as you need time. How about we just watch a cozy movie? Sound good?” I nod and cuddle into him. He puts on a cheesy romance movie, and trust me, I would love him to be balls-deep into me. I just can’t, being a virgin and all.

Yes, I’m still a virgin at twenty-seven, and I know there is no time limit on when you have sex for the first time. But when you have Gojo Saturu as your boyfriend, you want to have sex with him. I had a crush on him all through high school, and my dream finally came true when we got together at the end of last year. I wanted to wait until I found the right one. I just never thought that Satoru would be the one, So that’s why I’m so hesitant to do it with him. I trust him; I just don’t know how to go to that stage with him comfortably and naturally. And it stings a little more since Valentine’s Day is right around the corner. And I have no idea what to get him. What do you get the guy that has everything? So I call the only other person who knows him well enough, Geto.

“Hey, Y/n what’s up?”

“Hi um, I had a question about Gojo?” He pauses for a second and laughs.

“For Valentine’s Day?”

“Yeah, how did you know?”

“Because it’s tomorrow and it’s your guys’s first one together as a couple.” He responded as if it was obvious. 

“Right well I have no idea what to get him, I hate to ask this but what did pass girlfriends of his give him?” 

He pauses for a second to think. “Well, he really didn’t have girlfriends long enough to get through Valentine’s Day, and his past relationships were really just, um physical.” AKA just having sex with them, awesome… He can hear the gears turning in my head and adds on. “Y/n I think you just being with him is enough. you don’t know how long he has pinned for you.” Hearing this, I was surprised.

“Really?”

“Oh my gosh Yes! In school, I can’t count how many times he made puppy dog eyes at you or how he would make sure to pick up your favorite snack when he saw you feeling down.” I think back to our high school days and he was right Gojo was always there when I needed him even if I didn’t realize it.

“Thank you, Geto. I know now what I’m going to get him.” I confidentiality say.

“You're welcome I wouldn't want anyone else for my best friend.” I can hear his smile through his words and hang up. I have a gift to plan.

I put the gift together and put it on the table with a single blue rose on the side.

“Hey baby happy Valentine’s Day!” Gojo exclaimed walking into my apartment. I sidestep so he can see the gift.

“Is this for me?” He picked it up.

“Yes, it is... Satoru,” I responded, and he almost dropped his gift.

“You said my name! YES!” He shouted bear hugged and spun me around.

“Ha ha ha Saturu is it really that exciting?” I giggled as he put me down.

“Uh… YES! To hear my girlfriend say my name is the best gift ever.” To see him this excited is very cute and endearing.

“Well don’t say that yet, open this.” I gesture to the gift. He gives me a side eye and ripes it open to a sliver locket of a picture of us in high school. And on the other side is engraved “My forever”. He just stares and a tear falls without him even noticing. I put my hand on his face. And he leans into my warmth.

“I love it Y/n but why this picture?” This was a good question because we had many pictures of us from the last few years.

“It’s when I fell in love with you and I know you did with me too.” He squeezes my hand. “Geto told me how even when I couldn't see it you were there with me and how blind I was to it since I thought I was the only one in this relationship who had a huge crush on the other in high school.” He does a double-take at me.

“What really!” 

“Uh yeah, anytime I could I would sneak a peak at you and Shoko would tease the shit out of me.” I smile thinking about the days I would be in the basketball room watching him imaging him running over to me to kiss me for scoring a basket.

“Wow, we both have been pretty dumb if we didn’t see the other looking.” He pulls me in by the waist.

“Yeah, good thing we got smarter.” I put on the locket for him and tugged him closer to my lips.

“Thank you Y/n I will never take it off I promise to never take it off and by the way you are my forever too.” At that, my heart swells with all the emotions and at that I grab his tie and kiss him.

 He grabs my waist to steady himself and we back up he picks me up and puts me up on the kitchen counter. His hands start to massage my sides and mine go to his neck bringing me closer to a sense of bravery that I lick his lips. His tongue toches mine with a little hesitation this really being our first time going this intestically. I rang my tongue all around his fully tasting Gojo Saturu and I decided I wanted more.

“Satoru I’m ready.” I breathed heavily.

“Are you sure?” He mumbles from his red swollen lips. I palm his harding cock through his pants.

“What do you think?” I whisper in his ear.

He picks me up and I put my legs around his waist and he walks us to my bedroom. He gently lays me down and gets on top of me. And starts kissing down my neck teasly.

“Okay, baby we can stop anytime don’t be scared to tell me I won’t be mad.” He assured me with a sweet kiss adding another reason why I love this man. 

“Okay, got it.”

“That’s my girl~” He goes back to kissing my neck when the other goes to my button-up and unbuttons some and slips his hand through the slit and starts teasing my areola.

“Fuck Turu.” My body starts to heat up.

“Do you like that?” He asks with a slight tease knowing what he was doing.

“Uh huh” Barely being to answer.

“Good. well then how about this.” He departs from my neck and goes down to my chest and puts one in his mouth and sucks on it like it was a lollipop. His other hand started to fiddle with the other and without my realizing my tits were aroused and my pussy was starting to get wet. With a loud pop, he switches tits. I grab his hair, pull it, and throw my head back in pleasure. With my head back, his long fingers travel down to my skirt. He slowly pulls it down and lightly taps my slit.

“Turu that’s not fair~” I whined out at the teasing my body wiggling in actpation.

“Patenice babe, I need you ready for me. How rude would it be for me to make love to you without you being competently ready?” A full rube of the clit this time. I could marry him right now. His finger starts making small circles of my clit under my underwear making frictions that make me buck my hips up. It was like he was conducting an experiment. To see how much I could take. The finger then moves my underwear to the side and fully toches the clit. My knees want to close, not being used to this much attention.

“Babe, you can do this. I know you can.” And maintaining eye contact, he enters his long slender finger in. I jumped forward by his force. “That’s it, that’s my girl.” He saw the pleasure rising in my body. I had never felt anything like this, even with my own hand; it was like a whole different level of out-of-body experience. My pussy loved it letting more and more juices flow. It slowly starts to slowly pump in so I can adjust to it. He suddenly adds another one.

“AH Shit! Satoru!” He pumps faster and faster my walls clenching more and more I could tell I was about to cum. He then rubs my clit with his fingers pumping.

“AHH AHH FUCK!” I screamed out and squirted out. And soaked the sheets I didn’t even know I could do this.

“Oh my gosh thank you.” I breathssleey let out. 

“Anytime sweetheart anytime.” He kissed me again. I then start to palm his cock again and tried to pull it out. “Babe I would love that but this is all about you I want your first time to be… explosive. Also, I don’t think I’ll be able to last.” He undresses and pulls off his boxers his cock springs forward fully ereact. It was big like the biggest I had ever seen, it had girth and veins were running up it with blood holding it up. He took out a condom from his wallet. 

“Cocky are we?” I tease while leaning back on my elbows.

“Maybe, but also I wanted to be ready when you were and when it came I didn’t want it to be lost cause I was an idiot and didn’t have protection.”

“Mhh my boyfriend is fucking hot and smart.” I bite my bottom lip.

“Yes, he is.” He comes on top of me and bites that same lip in a searing kiss, pulling it in all different directions. His cock starts to rub the slit and clit making more lubrication. He gently pushes in, testing the waters. I sigh in deep, filling it and going in halfway through. It already feels so full.

“How is that?” 

“So good Tatru, want more.” I moaned out. So he pushes all the in. His cock pulses in my pussy feeling its tightness.

“Fuck Y/n So tight, tell me when I can move.” He muttered in my hair.

It finally starts to feel comfortable enough to move.

“You can move.” I whimper. With those three words, he starts to drive up. I had used plenty of toys in the past, feeling satisfied enough to just use them once at a time. But with this, I was already addicted, the veins protruding through the condom adding a textured ribbing to my walls. The fake cocks would have small fake veins that I sometimes question why they're even there, but I now know. I clench my legs around his waist to pull him in deeper. He starts thrusting slowly. Deep breaths from the both of us mingling in the lust mist surrounding us.

“You're so beautiful Y/n.” He leads my eyes to meet his. Our hands entangle together.

“Go... faster.” With that, he amps up the speed. Hit up and my pussy had never tightened more and pulsed in excitement. The speed he was going had our whole bed shaking. I had to take my other hand to grab the sheets to steady myself. Suddenly my clit is lit with fire as his fingers were playing with it. Wetness seeping out, sticking our bodies together. With all my experiences sex has never felt like this Saturu thought as his cock was about to explode and my pussy was very close. 

With one more pump, we both cum hard and my sheets were completely soaked. “Fuck Saturu that was…” 

He kisses me sweetly. “Amazing, thank you for trusting me Y/n.” 

He goes to my bathroom and gets a wet rag and walks over to me. And starts gently wiping the stickiness that was lingering.

“How about you go take a shower and I’ll change the sheets.” Satruru pulled me up by the arms and held me. His sliver locket shin

“Okay thank you Satruru.” I go to get my stuff.

“And can always join you too~” He gave me a devil smirk.

“Uh, give me at least an hour to recuperate, cowboy,”  I responded back with laughter and closed the door. Best Valentine’s ever.

Hey, y'all. I hope you liked it! I've been loving JJK and especially Satoru, so I had to write a fic for Valentine's Day even though it's four days later, lol. And I wanted Geto in there because I wanted their friendship in this. I am planning to write more for Satoru, so please keep an eye out! Remember you are loved and I'll see you later!

[therainscene]

Stranger Things 4 is themed around A Nightmare on Elm Street -- Vecna is a child-killer-turned-demon who murders teenagers from within their own minds; his heavily scarred skin and clawed hand resemble that of Freddy Krueger; and the actor who played Freddy himself plays his father.

I think Stranger Things 5 is gearing up to do something similar with The Terminator. Linda Hamilton (Sarah Connor) is the upcoming guest star this season; Vecna's exposed skull and vine-covered neck resembles the T-800--

--and Will's speech at the end of S4 bears striking similarities to Kyle Reece's famous "it can't be reasoned with" speech.

If Vecna is the T-800... then the Mind Flayer is the perfect candidate for Skynet.

[And Hawkins National Laboratory is Cyberdyne Systems -- a military-funded lab that meddled with phenomena beyond its ability to control and paved the way for a sinister hive mind to enter the world.]

I'm pretty sure that the Mind Flayer lies at the heart of whatever timey-wimey stuff is going on. It's suspiciously linked to timeline inconsistencies -- Will is already able to sense it in his neck before his possession in S2, and young Henry in TFS is haunted by the spider monster he wasn't supposed to create for another 20 years.

I've already written a theory on how a causal loop could tie Will and Henry to the Mind Flayer -- whatever's going on is probably more complicated than this, since my theory doesn't explain why the Upside Down is frozen -- but it's worth a read, I think, as it's the same type of time paradox as the one in Terminator and could easily be at the core of ST's time shenanigans.

Will is Kyle Reece or Sarah Connor -- so does that mean he's going to be a gun-toting badass?

No.

This scene is Will coming full circle from that moment in the shed at the start of S1: backed into a corner and forced to resort to violence because he sees no other way out. He doesn't want to kill the monster; he has to.

But the difference is that he's not cornered anymore.

This time around, Will knows his enemy, and he has supportive friends and family at his side. He's just so beaten down -- by Vecna, by Hawkins, by perceived rejections from Mike -- that he's lost all confidence in his ability to stand up for himself on his own terms.

I know it seems at first glance that Will advocates the use of violence in desperate times, but consider the context of the episode in which the above scene appears:

Joyce is reminiscing about her missing son while dealing with Lonnie telling her what to do and feel about it. Shortly after, she realizes how manipulative he's being and permanently kicks him out of her life (and the show lol) -- no violence necessary.

Will's advice hadn't been about the value of violence, but about the value of refusing to play by abusers' rules -- a key lesson in Stranger Things, as we've been watching El learn it the hard way over the course of four seasons.

Will cannot self-actualize by "finally" pulling the trigger on an approach that symbolizes his homophobic father's macho expectations. S5 is going to be about him regaining his self-confidence and allowing his authentic, gentle nature to guide him to the real solution.

So, to return to the "he's not gonna stop" speech: the theme at play here is inevitability, and it's one of the central themes of The Terminator -- not simply because the titular assassin is unstoppable, but because of the love story that drives the plot:

If Skynet hadn't sent the T-800 back in time to kill Sarah Connor before she could give birth to the leader of the human resistance, then Kyle would have had no reason to go back in time and end up unknowingly fathering John. No matter how hard Skynet tried to snuff John Connor out of existence, the rebellious love that created him was just as inevitable as the T-800.

This, I think, is the message at the heart of both Terminator and Stranger Things, and is the reason why The Terminator would be the perfect choice for S5's theme movie:

Sometimes the horrors wrought by humanity are inescapable...

...but so too is the hopeful human drive to love each other and overcome them.

Read Brenner's role in creating Vecna as a metaphor for homophobic Reagan-era fear-mongering and it all clicks into place, I think.

[fruity-mega-coconut69]

The One

[Pairings]: Jenna Ortega x Fem!Reader

[Summary]: Just a sweet movie night with your sweet girlfriend

[warnings]: none (?), my writing, sad attempt in writing fluff, not proof-read

A/N: Hey there again, fellow followers! So sorry for making you wait. I recently went on vacation and then got sick (stupid covid) but here it is!( also I'm trying out this pic-thing. is it good? or should i stick to gifs?)

---------------------------------------------------------------

“Baby?” Jenna’s soft, honey-like voice calls from the door of your bedroom, making you momentarily turn around and smile at her before going back to typing on your computer. Jenna sighs and walks over, leaning down slightly and putting her chin on your shoulder.

“What are you doing, hon?” 

You take your fingers off the keyboard and lean back against your chair. “You know what.” Jenna takes her chin off your shoulder and stands next to you, her hand replacing her chin on your shoulder. 

“Oh, I thought you had uh…..”Jenna looks up, taping on your shoulder as she thinks about the word.

“Writer’s block?” Jenna grins and nods “Yeah, I did. But…I don’t anymore.” You say, a small smile on your face. You crack your wrists and fingers before finally looking up at  Jenna. 

“That’s good to hear, baby. “Jenna smiles.”Uh, and even though I love that you’re finally writing your book again, I was thinking that we could…just cuddle and watch a movie or something?” Jenna asks, biting her lip as she looks at you.

Your eyes meet her deep brown ones and you feel a flutter in your chest before you grin. “Of course, Jen. It’s okay.” You stand up and push your chair back, groaning quietly as you stretch your legs and crack  your back which are sore and hurting after hours of sitting by your desk.

Jenna grins excitedly and starts walking out the room, with you following after her quietly. “I was hoping you’d say yes.” Jenna says to you as she reaches out to hold your hand. You soon arrive at what you call ‘Chill Room’. On the right side of the big room is a line of bookshelves, full of yours and Jenna’s favorite books. On the left is a line of arcade games that your cousins or Jenna’s sisters play most of the time when they’re over. In the middle of the room is a circle of armchairs and a table in the middle. At the end of the room is the ‘comfiest couch in the world’ as Jenna would say. 

The two of you walk to the couch and Jenna smiles as she sees the leg rest pulled out and fluffy blanket and pillows she set up prior to visiting you in your bedroom. “Because I already set it up.” You shake your head, smiling playfully at her before slumping down on the couch, your hoodie riding up from the mid of your thighs in cause of the action. Jenna giggles and grabs her laptop from the small table next to the couch and sits beside you, bringing the blanket over the two of you.

“So? What are we watching?” You ask softly, pulling the fluffy brown colored blanket up to your chin, you knees pulled up against your chest as you watch Jenna type in her password.

“I was thinking……..the Candyman. The first one” 

You snap your head to face her, noticing her already looking at you, batting her eyelashes at you innocently. “Jen! Come on! I thought we were going to relax ... .watch a good comedy and eat chips, not sit down to watch one and half an hour of gore and murder!” You whine, pleading with your eyes.

“I know, baby, But ... .halloween is coming soon and you know I like horror movies. They’re…my escape! “ Jenna bites her lip.

You sigh and shake your head. “You know, If I didn’t know you, I’d think you’re a psychopath.” 

Jenna smiles softly and giggles, which makes your heart flutter. “Is that a yes?” 

You exhale heavily before closing your eyes and nodding, but it was all worth it because the way Jenna lets out an excited ‘yes’ in victory then giggles is more than enough to make you open your eyes again and look at her lovingly as she sets up the movie.

“Done” Jenna exclaims and looks at you, seeing  you staring at her with that kind of look in your shining eyes. She blushes and places the laptop on your left and her right thigh. 

You snap your eyes away from her and blush too, looking down at the screen. She moves closer to you and wraps her right arm around your shoulders, your head falling onto her chest as you have already stretched out your legs for the laptop.

You inhale softly, her scent relaxing you as you place your right hand on Jenna’s stomach and the movies start to play. Your relaxation doesn’t last long as the opening scene plays, your heart thrumming in your chest.  Jenna giggles which makes your head shake a little.

“Calm down, baby. Nothing even happened yet.” 

Jenna’s little attempt in assuring you seemingly fails as you nod ‘Yet” Jenna just shakes her head at your response and brings her hand to your hair, playing with it to make you a bit more relaxed.

— —

After the movie ends, your head stays on Jenna’s head, processing what happened. Jenna is looking down at you with a small smile on her lips as her hand is continuously stroking your hair. After a while, you look up and blush under her gaze.

“So, what did you think?” She almost whispers.

“I’m never watching that again.” Your response makes Jenna laugh and you frown as your head shakes but it disappears when you focus back on her heavenly laugh. When her laughter dies down, she looks back down at you, your head still on her chest. And for a while, the two of you just lay there, staring at each other like there’s no one else on earth. Like nothing else matters at that moment. Only each other.

Jenna swallows thickly before leaning down briefly and kissing you on the lips before pulling back. You grin and push the laptop  off the two of you softly before sitting up higher and cupping Jenna’s cheek, leaning in and placing your lips on hers. You hum against her soft lip as you kiss, now both of her hands in your hair.  

You pull back after a couple of seconds but not too far so that your noses are touching, her breath fanning over your lips as she opens her eyes and looks into yours.

“I love you” She breathes out softly, a smirk on her now red lips.

You wet your lip subtly and your heart rate picks up further. “I love you too, idiot” 

Rolling your eyes, you lean back again and kiss Jenna passionately. 

And at that moment,  she knew it. You’re the one.

A/N: this kinda short, nah?

[itoshiexx]

unworthy (but chosen)

synopsis: rin doesn’t think he's worthy of your love, but he's glad you chose him anyway.

pairing: itoshi rin x gn!reader | words: 521 | warnings: established relationship, overthinking, hurt/comfort

notes: honestly i don't know what i'm doing. i feel like shit and wrote this on a whim (again) and decided to post it since @ode2rin told me to just do it so yeah! pretty sure it doesn't make any sense but oh well

the night is cold, but rin feels warm with your body pressed next to his under the covers of your bed. his arm is circled around your waist, and he can feel your breath tickle his skin as you nuzzle further into his neck, always seeking for more of him in a way he can’t seem to understand. 

truth be told, rin doesn’t know why you are with him. scratch that, he does: it’s because you love him, and that is something he can’t wrap his pretty head around. 

you were like a ray of sunshine, always with a positive outlook on life, far different from his cold and pessimistic persona. you were full of life and still had that sparkle in your eyes, whilst rin felt like he carried an abyss inside of him, filled with a mixture of anger, sorrow and an unstoppable void that nagged at his skin in the darkest hours of the night. 

itoshi rin was rotten to the core, fucked up on the head, so broken and bruised there was barely anything left of him to cherish. you didn’t deserve to be on the receiving end of his sharp shards, to be cut by his careless words fueled by trauma and fear. you should never bleed on his behalf. 

yet, the longer you stayed, the more it happened. although your life together was full of a joy rin never knew could exist, it was inevitable to have its downsides, where his toxin would spread like a wildfire and contaminate everything. 

he would never admit it, but rin was scared of the day his poison would inevitably reach your heart of gold and kill it. he would rather die than be the reason your light went out.

“you deserve better,” he would always say. and you’d smile, cradling his cheeks like he was worth something, before saying the same thing: “i chose you, and i choose you every day.”

he doesn’t understand why you choose him if he wouldn’t even choose himself.

as you stir in your place on top of his chest and open your eyes blearily to look at his teal ones, rin can’t help but feel the weight in his heart easen a little. unconsciously, his hold on your waist tightens. 

“rin…? is everything okay?” you slur, voice laced with tiredness. again, he can’t help the guilt that claws up his throat and the small voice in his head that says you deserve better. 

but then, when you touch his cheek with such tenderness and eye him with a gaze so full of love, rin remembers why he doesn’t let you go even if he deems himself unworthy of your love. 

“it’s nothing, love. go back to sleep,” he whispers in response. his hand trails from your waist up to your head, where he starts petting your hair in an attempt to lull you back to dreamland. it always worked. somehow, you felt safe with him.

and he’s thankful. that you chose him before, and that you choose him every day of your life.

he would choose you in a hundred lifetimes, too.

© 2023 itoshiexx. do not plagarise, translate, or repost any of my work on here or other sites.

if you like my writing and would like to support me, you can 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐦𝐞 𝐚 𝐭𝐢𝐩 𝐨𝐧 𝐤𝐨-𝐟𝐢 ! any amount is welcomed and very appreciated! ♥