#fuckin neato

[skeyewards]

imposter syndrome suck my sphincter!!!!!!!!!!!!

[mercyking]

Sometimes...I live in a world where Gary King and Nicholas Angel are cousins.

And sometimes...SOMETIMES...Nicholas' uncle Derek is Gary's dad.

[chokech3rry]

hoffman sometimes mentions his college frat days in passing and, in an effort to seem cool, lawrence mentioned being in the alpha omega alpha frat. hoffman immediately called him out for being a fucking nerd because ΑΩΑ is a medical honor society and it did hurt lawrence’s feelings a little bit.

[monogramsalarm]

love when i put something on an ebay watchlist just to save it for later, then the seller immediately is like "hey what if i knock off $10?" so then i GOTTA get it

[anonymouscomrade]

fun fact: the half-off voucher the Humane Society gives you for spaying/neutering a new pet only applies to the fee for the actual procedure! bloodwork, the vaccinations you should be getting for a new pet, the very fucking anesthetic they use for the procedure, etc, NONE OF THAT IS COVERED

i just learned about this after dropping my cat off at the vet to be spayed this morning

[silent-sentinels]

ALLLLLRIGHTY LET'S TAKE THESE FOR A SPIN~!! hellloooooo chanterelle!!! :3!!!

haha omg <333 :'> hi ryan, how are you? <333

HA NICE FEELING GOOD FEELIN ✨ SO FINE ✨ LET'S GET IT okay how about jessie? jesse? do you like jessebel? (jesabel? jezebel?) :0

hm... i don't know? i um. i like the soft "sse" better than a z, and i like that the j is a lil soft but still has a bit of solid consonant sound.. and the "elle" ending is sweet, i like it :'> <33

josabelle? isabelle? belle in general?

josabelle is a little silly, but closer... isabelle doesnt have the um the solid consonant, and belle doesn't feel right...

okay looking at da name site did NOT help lmaooo wtf!!

hmn i think i like the names less now actually? including chanterelle :'<

no its fine!! it's all good girliepop we'll find you something you like!! we'll try again tomorrow it's all good my dude

hehe thank you ryan <3 do you still like yours?

lmao yes absolutely tho we'll see how we feel tomorrow huh? :P me that's me!! bunny boy extraordinaire! im ryan im ryan MY NAME IS RYAN!!! >:DDD!!!!!!! haha NICE :] feeling GREAT about this. do u want me to edit ur names outta da intros?

yes please thank you :> <3 i love you ryan <33

LOVE YA TOO HEARTSY we'll find u something i prommy <33

[oldinterneticons]

That's real fuckin' neato

[evilminji]

:O !!! Wait a second... GHOST DINOSAURS!!!

They died. There are ghost animals. You CAN NOT tell me getting fuckin nuked from space by a GIANT rock that blasted you and everything you've ever known into near instantaneous oblivion, wouldn't leave some Unfinished Business and a shit ton of Ectoplasm.

BILLIONS of things died all at once.

Did most move on? Probably. We're any of them sentient? We have no idea! Maybe! Unlikely, but maybe! Still a MASSIVE, countries wide, molten earth lined, crater of instant death. World shaking and history making. Death in the blink of an eye.

If you're lucky.

But! I hear the arguments now. That was one event. The X or Y dinosaur lived before that! What I'm interested in came AFTER! Good points! But not RELAVENT!!! Because you know what ELSE that giant fuck-off meteor is good for? Aside for Death(tm)?

Television.

Makes for some damn good documentaries. Exciting graphics and neato visual effects. Ooooh~ look at our dramatic recreation! The cute baby animals, unsuspecting of their Doomed Fate~! Tense music! And now, a world from our advertisers!

You know who LIKES Space Documentaries? Danny. He's all ABOUT that Science Channel. Granted, they've been pulling more and more of these mid-tear "aliens built the pyramids" and "look at these swords!" Shows... but! Still! He grew up on this channel! He doesn't WANT to give up on it!

And, yeah, this is... kinda hammy... but it's still watchable!

He's enjoying the live tweeting from paleontologists who are ROASTING the thing to a lovely golden brown. Has choked on his noodles like three times already. It's great! But now? They are arguing over what the dinosaurs actually looked like again... and??

And, look, maybe it's the good mood and boredom. Maybe it's having the house to himself. Maybe it's his parents finally encouraging him to use his "ghostiness" for SCIENCE(tm)(!) the other day. Could even be his bad idea impulse acting up again, buuuuut.....

Teeeeechnically?

Nothing? Is STOPPING him? From finding out? He DOES have Zone compatible cameras. And can probably back trace where they should-ish be? He can find out. The colors might be off, but it's a starting point? Right? And heck, he's pretty sure inverse coloration in standard unless someone's shape-shifting, so he'd just have to inverse it AGAIN to get an approximately correct coloration for them!

....eh, as long as he leaves a "not exact, this was the best I could get" note, it should be fine.

Road Trip time! Better call Dani and see if she wants to ride a few giant mammals and some lizards!

(Needless to say? Some researchers get VERY exciting emails. And only accept they are POSSIBLE, because this is a DC crossover. So there is aliens and magic regularly popping up in their field of expertise, so WHY NOT? Just the other day, a whole ass TOWN that has been wiped out... got UN-wiped out! 23 years later! It's made headlines. Weird shit happens.

So gib. Release to them the Dinosaurs, mystery email man. Fork them over before they begin biting. You think this corduroy jacket means they won't hunt you down? HA! You know NOTHING of academics! WHERE ARE THE EXTINCT ANIMALS? Where are you hiding them!?!?)

@the-witchhunter @hypewinter @nerdpoe @ailithnight @hdgnj @mutable-manifestation

[gravehags]

i think being in bed with aether on one side and cumulus on the other would be real fuckin neato. a delightful cozy ghoul sandwich, your arm draped around cumulus’ waist and your face resting on her shoulder while aether molds his body to yours behind you, wrapping his arm around your waist and breathing in the smell of your shampoo.

maybe rutting a little against your ass

good stuff

[yakool-foolio]

And so, TGAA2 case 3 begins! Friends and strangers alike have been hyping up this case for me, so it's time to see if it really rings true! Will the case 3 curse finally be broken? I'm excited to find out!

MYSTERY MAN SPOTTED! I nearly coughed up my ice cream cause I'm too excitable over more prosecutor lore. Ooooo I hope Van Zieks' so-called curse gets expanded upon, it's such a fun idea. I'm a sucker for wide-spread rumors of the supernatural so ingrained in the community it practically becomes reality.

Kazuma's real mission definitely has something to do with the names in that morse code message. A mission to meet up with this seemingly random quartet of people from Japan n Britain, but what they were to discuss or take action on is completely lost on me. Doesn't help that the quartet has been reduced to a duet now.

Alright alright Stronghart we know you'll write twenty-page essays to back up your 'totally correct' opinion but I'm just gonna need you to SHUT UP FOR A FUCKIN' SECOND-

VAN ZIEKS DON'T GET IN MY WAY LET ME TALK TO THE MYSTERY MAN! Damn you're hot though. What? Anyway, clearly mystery apprentice over here has to be apt in combat if you're both gonna get jumped after every trial. Ah, so Van Zieks considers The Reaper to be a separate person altogether; an identity completely detached from this 'curse' he bears. He does not wish to be feared.

Woah wait so Stronghart is purposefully keeping mystery man's identity concealed and under lock n key with the assistance of Van Zieks? Hm ja interessant. Oh what a treat, a person with no identity to call their own! This hole was made for me!

Someone surely sabotaged Harebrayne's machine to kill Asman. Now who's gonna tell him that his college friend is gonna indirectly be the death of him?

Gina's a detective apprentice now, neato! Wait how many detectives are in TGAA now??? 4??? New record! I hope all the detectives in this duology can hold hands n spin in a circle, peace and love.

(To Whom That Requested To Be Tagged For My Case 3 Reactions: @raymondshields)

[datauthorress]

the love never ends [chapter 1]

Pairing: Wade Wilson / Original Female Character, Logan / Original Female Character, Cable / Original Female Character, Wade Wilson / Logan, Wade Wilson / Cable

Summary: On his search to find Wolverine, Deadpool comes across a variant of Shelby O’viere, the only one left in her universe after a complete extinction of everyone else. With his own reality’s version of her dead, Deadpool decides to have her tag along so he has a buddy.

Cue to them saving the universe and Shelby has to live in a completely different world where not only is a variant of Logan here, but as well as the man that her own variant loved, Cable.

Love is seriously all kinds of fucked up.

Warnings: Canon-Typical Violence, Deadpool and Wolverine Movie (2024), Variants from Other Universes, Talk of Death and Deceased Characters, Survivor Guilt, Depression, Romance/Adventure/Drama/Smut, Explicit Sexual Content, Loss of Virginity, Vaginal Sex, Anal Sex, Oral Sex, Friends to Lovers, Foursome - F/M/M/M

Rating: Explicit

“Oh, damn…..there’s like nobody here. What, did everyone just fucking die off?”

A gunshot shot off the ground in front of him, causing Wade to shriek in surprise and take a step back. He glanced up towards one of the highest roofs of the X-Mansion, seeing a hooded figure sitting there with a sniper rifle poised at him.

“Next shot is your head,” the figure said, a feminine voice coming from their lips.

Wade gasped loudly, putting his hands on his face. “I know that voice! Shelby!”

“What?” the woman asked, confused. “How do you know my….?”

“I had one of you in my reality! Of course, she’s dead now, fuckin’ lung cancer, but still, I had one of you!” Wade exclaimed.

The woman levitated off of the roof and landed on the ground about ten feet in front of Wade. She took off her hood, revealing a young-looking woman with dark brown hair that cascaded over her shoulder in thick streams, her bangs long and nearly covering the right side of her face. Her eyes, cerulean blue, sparkled in the warm sunlight. She was wearing a pair of jeans that hugged her legs quite nicely, Wade added, a t-shirt underneath and some kind of cloak or cloth that mostly went over her shoulders and back with a hood on the back. She was wearing black boots and fingerless black gloves.

“My name is Shelby,” she admitted.

“Well, of course it is. I’d recognize your voice anywhere. You’ve got a very distinct voice, coming from Bex Taylor-Klaus that the author had decided to base your appearance off of.” Wade said.

“What?” she asked, confused.

“Eh, nevermind.” He said, waving a dismissive hand. “So, you live here at the X-Mansion?”

“Yeah, I’ve been here for the last few years.” She replied.

“Neato. Where are the others? Surely you’re not living here by yourself.”

“They’re dead.”

“I’m sorry?”

“They’re dead. All of them. Including every human being and mutant on the planet. I’m the only one alive here.” Shelby explained.

“What happened?”

“I killed them,”

After Shelby’s statement, she further explained that when she was 20 years old, she had been learning to control her mental abilities when she had a complete nervous breakdown and sent out a pulse that destroyed the neural networks of every human being and mutant on the planet. They had all just dropped dead. When Shelby had realized what she had done, she tried to reverse what she had done, but it had been too late. The damage was done, and she had been living on her own the past ten years, having no guts to end her own life.

“But you didn’t mean to,” Wade pointed out, chewing on a piece of smoked beef jerky.

“Yeah well, I keep telling myself that.” Shelby said, sipping from a water bottle. “Why are you here, Wade?”

“Well, I’m looking for a Wolverine.”

“Logan? Yeah, I killed him too.”

“Yeah, well….the Logan in my reality got chest-fucked by a tree and died, and the TVA has decided that since Logan is dead because he was some anchor-being for my reality, that my reality deserves to be destroyed. So, I figure, I’ll find me a Wolverine and replace him. Can’t be that hard.” Wade replied.

“Well, there’s no Logan here.” Shelby scoffed.

“Yeah, guess I gotta head to another reality.” Wade replied, before he went quiet for a second and then had an ‘aha’ look on his face. “Hey! Why don’t you come with me?”

“Why would I do that?” she asked, arching an eyebrow.

“It’s gotta be lonely here,” he said. “You come with me and you can live in my reality with me! Hell, we can be roommates!”

“Jesus Christ, you’re annoying.” Shelby huffed.

“Come on……when’s the last time you had human contact?”

Shelby glanced at him for a long moment, the wheels turning in her head before she sighed. “Alright, fine….there’s nothing left for me here. Just let me grab some things and we’ll go.”

“That’s the spirit!” Wade laughed.

A backpack and a duffle bag later, Shelby and Wade were walking through a portal to a different reality.

~

“Shelby?”

The Logan variant’s voice is nothing but a mere whisper when his dark eyes landed on the young woman. Her eyes softened slightly.

“I’m not her, Logan.” She said softly.

Logan stared at her in disbelief before he looked away, holding onto Wade’s gun that was aimed directly at his forehead. He lifted the bottle of alcohol to his lips and downed the entire bottle, causing Wade to whistle.

Logan pulled the bottle away from his lips, mumbling something before he fell backwards, landing on the wooden floor with a heavy thud, passing out.

“Jesus Christ,” Shelby muttered.

“He’s perfect!” Wade exclaimed, before he stood over Logan’s prone form and started to lift him up by his shirt, only to glance underneath his shirt. “Heyyyyy, nice pajamas.”

Shelby came over and glanced underneath the shirt as well, seeing yellow and blue.

“It’s his comics accurate suit! Oh, it looks so good on him!” Wade chuckled. “Help me get him up.”

Between the two of them, they were able to lift Logan off of the ground, putting his arms over their shoulders.

Shelby had forgotten how heavy Logan was.

~

They arrive to the TVA, only to be informed of why the Logan they picked was the worst one. Shelby jumped as Wade was hit by some kind of taser, causing his entire frame to disappear in sparks. Logan was next and Shelby glanced at Paradox with wide eyes.

Before she’s too struck by the taser and she’s flying through darkness.

~

Shelby wakes up to Wade and Logan fighting, stabbing each other with their weapons and claws so much they’re both bleeding out.

“Guys, seriously?” Shelby groaned, standing up with a soft wince.

Within moments, they’re surrounded by bad guys and one annoying Sabertooth. Shelby sighed softly, crossing her arms as Logan and Sabertooth charged towards each other, but Logan won with a single swipe to Sabertooth’s neck.

They’re knocked out soon afterwards.

~

Shelby wakes and realizes that she, Logan and Wade are pressed up tightly against one another. Shelby is in between them and she can feel Wade’s head on her shoulder as he’s still passed out.

Shelby’s gaze filtered up towards Logan, who looked annoyed. “Well, this is awkward.” She muttered.

“You’re telling me,” he snorted.

Wade woke with a start, shaking his head slightly. “How long was I out?”

“Not all of you was asleep, Wade.” Shelby said.

“Oops,”

~

They manage to get a vehicle from Nicepool and drive across the vast expanse of the Void until Wade says “if they can fix your universe”. It caused Logan to slam down on the breaks and put the car in park, stabbing Wade a few times before going on a rant about how pathic Wade was.

“I’m gonna fight you now,” Wade said quietly.

“Nope,” Shelby said, opening the door and stepping out. She wanted nothing to do with their bloodshed.

They fight for hours. Shelby manages to get a few hours of sleep before jolting awake once its quiet. She got up, brushing herself off before she walked over to the car and peeked inside, seeing that both men were passed out on the seats. Wade was tied up with the seatbelts of the car and Logan was passed out next to him, both of them covered in blood.

“Men,” she sighed, before she opened the passenger side door in front and brushed the glass off of the seat. She sat down in it and leaned back against the seat, before dozing off.

~

They meet the resistance group and come up with a plan to get into Catherine’s base. Logan is reluctant, refusing to join them. When night falls, Shelby goes out to the fire with Laura, where Logan is drinking. He explains to them what happened to his world and after Laura shares some heartfelt words, she leaves, leaving Shelby and Logan by the fire.

“She’s right, y’know,” Shelby said. “You may be the wrong guy, but you were the one she needed.”

Logan grunted, taking another swig from the bottle.

“What was I like….in your world?” she asked cautiously.

Logan is quiet for a moment before he speaks. “You were young, learning to control your powers, but you had potential. You were strong, stronger than I ever could be. No matter how much I pushed you away, you wouldn’t leave me behind. Scott would always tell me ‘Shelby’s looking for you’, ‘Shelby wants to show you her powers’, ‘Shelby misses you’.” he said softly. “You were the only person I let in, and then you were killed.”

Shelby was quiet, listening to him as he spoke about the Shelby of his reality. It reminded her too much of the Logan of her own reality, the Wolverine, the man she had been drawn to ever since she had arrived at the X-Manson. “You were pretty much the same in my reality. A stubborn bastard who tried to push me away, until you stopped and you started letting me in. Then, well…..I killed everyone on the planet.”

“Guess we have things in common,” he said.

“Seems so.” She said.

Logan sighed after a moment and tossed the bottle away from him, before standing up. “C’mon, let’s get some sleep. We’ve got a big day tomorrow.”

She grinned softly, taking the hand that was offered to her. She knew he would change his mind.

~

They manage to break into Cassandra’s base and fight their way through, only for Cassandra to knock Wade out and force Logan and Shelby to their knees.

“I may not be able to penetrate your mind,” Cassandra said, lightly stroking a finger along the curve of Shelby’s jaw. “But I can penetrate his,”

Hearing Logan in pain caused her heart to break. She struggled to break the grip of where she was, but it was too strong. “Leave him alone!” she shouted.

Shelby heard a thud and glanced behind her as Wade grabbed the backpack that had been thrown up to them. He unzipped it, pulling out Juggernaut’s helmet. Shelby nodded and Wade maneuvered behind Cassandra and put the helmet over her head, causing her grip on Logan and Shelby to break.

Of course, Pyro shot her. Of course, they agreed to take the helmet off so she could heal. As soon as they did, she revealed the Sling Ring that she had this entire time and told them they had four seconds to get through the portal.

“Come on!” Shelby shouted, grabbing both Logan and Wade by their hands and the three of them ran towards the portal. Everything seemed to go by in slow motion, as they jumped off the base and headed right for the portal. The monster that roamed the Void reached them, but they managed to get through the portal.

They were falling through the sky and Shelby saw the ground, covered by cars, quickly coming up. Logan grabbed her, turning his body so his back would meet the car instead of her. He held her tight against his chest as they collided with the car, causing the reverberation to shake Shelby’s entire frame.

“Fucking Christ, oh my god, ow….” Shelby grimaced.

“You okay, bub?” he asked, a bit breathlessly.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m okay. Thanks for that, Logan.” She replied.

Logan nodded and helped her onto the ground. They had to get to the TVA.

~

Cassandra arrives on Earth, forcing Paradox to tell her about the Time Ripper and she has decided to destroy all realities, forcing Paradox to go with her to the base in order to complete her mission.

When the trio tries to go after her, they are intercepted by 100 variants of Deadpool, who then shoot at them. Shelby is hit in the thigh and she shouts out in pain, before diving behind the car with Logan and Wade.

“Put pressure on it,” Logan told her, ripping off a piece of the cloak she wore over her shoulders and pressed it against the wound. “We’ll get the bullet out later, but keep pressure on it for now.”

Wade drags the paralyzed Nicepool out into the crossfire, who is killed when his head explodes. Wade dives down behind a large sign and Logan holds up Dogpool, causing the other variants to stop firing. Shelby is helped over to Wade, who takes the gold pistols.

“You’re such a goddamned moron,” Shelby announced.

~

They make it through the Deadpool variants, who all regenerated and were planning on fighting once more until Peter arrived and told them that they were with him. The other Deadpool’s cheer, allowing Shelby, Logan and Wade to head down into the subway and to the TVA.

“Oh, now you’re here!” Paradox scoffed as they rushed into the room. “Oh well, you’re too late, it’s all over.”

         “Not yet, it’s not.” Logan said.

         “No, no, no, no, but we’re very close.” Wade spoke. “Homestretch, folks, promise. Quick! Let’s have the stakes.”

         “If she steals the Time-Ripper’s energy, she has the power to shred the fabric of all realities until there is nothing left but the void.” Paradox explained.

         “So how do we shut it down?” Shelby demanded.

         “I don’t know,”

         Logan let loose a snarl and shoved Paradox against the control board, his metallic claws unsheathing to press threateningly close at Paradox’s face. “How about now?” he growled.

         “The mask is really intimidating,” Wade laughed. “It’s like Batman except he can move his neck.”

         “Okay, look, look, look.” Paradox said quickly, pressing a few buttons on the control board and pulling up the video of a machine, that held two feeds into a single chamber, with glowing blue in one feed and glowing orange into another feed. “The Ripper is fed from a secure chamber below ground. It is powered by twin matter and anti-matter feeds converging inside the device. Now Cassandra Nova is redirecting the Ripper’s power to eliminate all timelines, starting with this one. Theoretically, you could stop her by short-circuiting the feeds in the chamber below. One of you would create a circuit between the two feeds, then the released power would destroy the machine. But well-,”

         “Come on, man!” Wade exclaimed. “If you’re not gonna swallow, spit it out!”

         “Whoever formed the bridge would be annihilated.” Paradox finished with a thick swallow.

         “I could live with that,” Logan said with a shrug.

         “I could live with that too, actually.” Wade said. “….we survive anything. We’re like cockroaches.”

         “Not this time,�� Paradox said, shaking his head. “This is matter and anti-matter. They do not play nicely with each other. When they mix in your body, you will be atomized. Trust the laws of physics if you don’t trust me. Even if you lived long enough to make the circuit, you will die down there.”

          Shelby exchanged a glance with Logan and Wade, nervousness in her features.

         ~

         “Hold up, hold up.” Logan said as they reached the door that led to the chamber of the Time Ripper. “You guys heard that asshole upstairs. Even if we pull this off, we’re dead, permanently.”

         “That’s why it’s gotta be me.” Wade said.

         “What?” Shelby and Logan asked at the same time. “Fuck that, no! It’s gotta be me!”

         Wade groaned and took his mask off, now able to look at both of them in the eyes. “Look, guys, neither of you asked for any of this. Logan was right. I lied right to his face, just to get him to help me.”

         “You didn’t lie,” Logan sighed. “You made an educated wish. Come on,” he said and pulled out the family photo that Wade had dropped in the Honda Odyssey. “You got a whole world to go back to. I got nothing.”

         Logan patted Wade on the chest with his fist and approached the door. He unlocked it, giving it a push open.

         “Logan!” Shelby said, before she bounded over to him.

         Right as Logan turned to face her, she cupped his cheeks with both hands and leaned up, pressing her lips to his in a deep kiss. A choked off sort of noise left Logan’s lungs, utterly surprised by the sudden kiss. He didn’t get a chance to return it, as Shelby pulled away with a soft smile on her features.

         “I’m sorry, both of you.” she said with an apologetic expression on her features.

         Without warning, she used telekinesis to grab Logan by his arm and toss him away from the door. Shelby quickly went into the chamber, shutting the door and locked it.

         “Hey!” Wade and Logan both shouted, before slamming their fists on the windows. “What the fuck are you doing?!”

         “Wade, you have a family to get back to. Logan, Wade is your family now.” Shelby replied somberly, putting her hand on the window. “I destroyed everyone in my world, remember? I have nothing. I don’t deserve to live.”

         “That’s not true!” Wade shouted, banging his fist on the door.

         “I’m sorry,” Shelby said softly, cerulean eyes lowering before a soft smile spread across her features. “Say hi to your friends for me,”

         As she walked away from the door and headed to the middle of the chamber between the two feeds, she could feel the energy radiating off of them. It was powerful, making her skin prickle and her hair raise. This was going to kill her, she knew it. But she was okay with that, because after everything she did, if she could do something to save Wade’s universe and give Logan another chance at life, she would do it for them in a heartbeat.

         She heard them shouting at her as she approached the matter feed, taking a deep breath. With telekinesis enhancing her strength, she slammed her fist into the feed and pulled out tubes of pure, raw matter. The sheer energy of the matter made powerful sensations course up the length of her arm, causing her to grimace. She let out a pained shout as she pulled with all of her might, trying to pull enough out so she could grab onto the tubes of the anti-matter.

         Forcing herself through the pain, Shelby outstretched her hand towards the anti-matter feed. “Come on!” she shouted, struggling to use her powers to force the feed to break so the tubes could come out. “Come on you fucking fuck!”

         The matter coursing through her body was nearly overwhelming, her veins beginning to glow blue from underneath her skin as she struggled towards the anti-matter feed.

         “Please!” Shelby begged.

         She turned her attention back to the matter feed, before she suddenly felt a gloved hand grab ahold of her arm, instinctively her hand grabbed onto their arm. Her head whipped around to see Wade, who’s own other arm was outstretched and holding onto Logan’s. Without hesitation, Logan sunk his claws into the anti-matter feed and all three of them shouted as the matter began coursing through their bodies, with Logan’s shirt literally being ripped to shreds.

         Shelby could feel the energy beginning to stabilize within her, as they created a circuit that began to overload both of the feeds.

         It all became slow in motion.

         Shelby closed her eyes and saw the faces of her friends, the ones she had killed, let down. But then she sees the faces of her new friends, Logan and Wade and Laura and tears stung the corners of her eyes as she realized she did have something to live for.

         She had them.

         Shelby’s eyes fluttered open and she turned her attention to Wade and Logan, who were both looking at her. She nodded and they nodded back and Shelby focused her powers on the energy coursing through all three of them.

         Tears streamed down her cheeks as the sensation increased ten-fold, pain radiating through her entire form.

         And then…

         And then it all went white.

         ~

         She was dying.

         Her lungs felt full, it was hard to breathe. She could feel something….

         “Come on!”

         A harsh push on her chest caused water to gargle up her throat and she erupted into a coughing fit, rolling onto her side. A rough hand patted her on the back to get the water out of her lungs and she continued coughing for a moment until she was able to take a full breath.

         “Oh my god, drowning is the fucking worst…” Shelby coughed.

         “You fucking crazy moron,” Logan growled. “What the hell were you thinking? If we didn’t get into the chamber in time, you would have been killed!”

         “I made a choice, Logan,” Shelby said, glancing up at him.

         “You stupid….” He bared his teeth in a snarl, before he grabbed her jaw with a rough hand and yanked her close, his lips roughly converging with hers in an angry, deep kiss.

         Shelby squeaked, but melted into the kiss and couldn’t help but moan softly into it. Logan pulled away after a few seconds, his chest still heaving.

         “Wow,” Wade said dreamily.

         “You’re a fucking moron too!” Logan snapped at Wade, before he yanked Wade’s mask up to his nose and was kissing him next, his facial hair scrapping against Wade’s scarred skin.

         Wade downright moaned into the kiss, grabbing at Logan’s shoulder before they parted. Wade sighed dreamily, before he was pulling Shelby into a kiss next. It felt different kissing Wade than Logan due to his scarring, but she returned it all the same.

         Once the three of them parted from the kisses, Shelby stood up with help and they walked out of the chamber, hearing Paradox’s voice.

         “He has risen, baby girl!” Wade announced, his voice echoing as he pulled down his mask.

         “FUCK!” Paradox shouted in frustration.

         ~

         Shelby watched tiredly as a partially destroyed bus was taken away on a tow truck, while taking a bite of the Shawarma that Wade had gotten them.

         “You know,” Wade said between bites. “The Avengers discovered Shawarma.”

         “They’d be lucky to have you,” Logan said, swallowing down his food.

         Wade smiled and took another bite of his food, before all three of them heard a bark. They watched as Mary Puppins came bounding around the corner towards them. “Fuck off!” Wade exclaimed, literally throwing his food onto the cement. “Come here my little cuntchkin! Yes, that’s you, you’re a survivor!”

         Wade picked the dog up, hugging her against his chest. “All is right in the world!” he smiled.

         “So what now?” Shelby asked, finishing up with her food.

         “Well,” Wade began. “I do share an apartment with Blind Al.”

         “I don’t think all four of us and a dog are gonna fit in a one bedroom apartment, bub.” Logan said, matter-of-factly.

         “But we can make it work,” Wade said with a grin. “There’s a pullout bed and I think all three of us can fit.”

         “I’m game,” Shelby nodded. God, she desperately needed a shower.

         “Well, I didn’t kiss you two for the hell of it.” Logan said, a smirk on his rugged features.

         ~

         “Al, I’m back!” Wade called as he led Logan and Shelby into the apartment, with Shelby shutting the door behind her.

         “About damn time!” the elderly, black, blind woman said, walking towards them. “I’m all out of devil’s dandruff and I’m shaking like an angry vibrator!”

         Shelby snickered.

         “Thank you, Al. We have company.” Wade said, before he looked at Shelby and Logan with hesitation, before Logan nodded. “Althea, this is Logan, my….my boyfriend. And this is Shelby, my girlfriend.”

         “Nice to meet you, Shelby, Logan.” Al said with a smile, shaking both of their hands.

         “Nice to meet you too.” Logan said with a smile as well.

         “And this little ancient ass shit-knot is Mary Puppins, or as I like to call her, Dogpool.” Wade said, leaning forwards a bit towards Al. “You wanna treat yourself to a little stroke? Get the tongue.”

         Al reached forward and felt the tongue that hung out of Mary Puppins’ mouth. “Oh my god, motherfucker!” she exclaimed in disgust.

         “Right, it’s like an armadillo fucked a gremlin, angrily, in a bed of gonorrhea and didn’t stop till the sun came up.” Wade chuckled.

         ~

         A celebration was something that Shelby, nor Logan were used to. With new friends around, and those friends to call family. Shelby hadn’t even celebrated her own birthday in ten years and now she finally felt that she could move on and forgive herself for what had happened back in her home world.

         She’s sitting between Wade and Logan, with Logan’s hand on her thigh in a comforting way. She was around people she didn’t know very well, so her anxiety about meeting new people was a bit high, but with Logan’s touch on her knee and Wade’s presence beside her, she could feel herself calming down.

         It had been a few days since they had saved the universe and while the three of them hadn’t had sex yet, they had fallen into a complex, but shared relationship with each other. They balanced themselves out with each other. Shelby knows that Vanessa, Wade’s ex-girlfriend was staring at both Shelby and Logan. While Shelby didn’t know why Vanessa was staring at her, she could understand why she was staring at Logan. Logan was gorgeous, a shit brickhouse of a man that was all muscle and testosterone and towered over Shelby by nearly a foot.

         Shelby moved her hands on either side of her, one curling around Logan’s and the other around Wade’s. Both men glanced at her and the three of them smiled.

         Sometimes your family was a gruff wolf of a man, a wheelbarrow full of cancer, a powerful psychic, said gruff man’s daughter and the world’s ugliest dog.

         It felt good.

[malwaresilly]

Ouhdhsgsjdjsh *fuckin incoherent giggling*

Thatwould be neato :333

(also RAHHH IM GLAD U LIKE IT EBEBEBEB💥💥💥)

"I've got a surprisingly wide wardrobe so, keep on lookout for stuff like that"

[jacenotjason]

Brought on by this answer to the ask about the Opposites and Originals meeting:

And I bring you this (might digitalization later, and to that one user you betted wrong)

Og: Who’re YOU calling dumb?! You’re just my Doppelgänger, a cheep copy!

Op: Try me, you fvcking Cuntapillar!

[Opposite Maria and Original standing off to the side, OG worried and OP thinking ‘this is fine’]

I KNEW ITT!!I K N. E W. IT!!!

YESSS THIS IS SO GOOD!! OG WOULD TOTALLY CALL OP A “CHEAP COPY” THATS SO HIM I CANT EVEN- AND FUCKIN “CUNTAPILLAR!??!” THATS HIUSYAODH AHUAHURHEHAUI-

I LVOE IT

And i love Maria too, i love the detail of their striped leggings thats so neato

(Aa obligatory AU masterpost link)

[crabknight]

ECHOESSSSSSSSSSS Python, i'm sorry, but i'm not sure if i'm gonna use you. Tobin is cooler and has a lot more stats on you cause of the base villager class. Also i'm pretty sure the max unit count is 10.

ALRIGHT BOYS LETS GO KILL!

Goodness. He looks so punchable. Then again, thats kinda the point :p

Just realized that because hes blown up on my computer, Desaix looks like he doesnt have any pupils. Spooky

Alm, two apples tall: Damn, this bit is so versatile...

99% sure hes gonna defect. cause hes an ass.

See?

Cant wait to send you reeling on your ass Fernand... ...My VA sensors are tingling again, and its toward Desaix. Okay... lemme scroll down here... Spits out drink

Okay, what else...

A WHAT HOLY SHIT THATS AMAZING Talented man... I guess this is what would happen if Igor served Narl-[I am Shot]

Anyways back to Fernand complaining about his previous job to Desaix

GET ADOPTED IDIOT

Love the word dastard, its like bastard but less! Also new name alert!!!! Neato

Ohhhh i could make so many Persona Jokes...

WOAH CUTSCENE!

This guy get his armor made out of his hair or something?

YEAH I FEEL THE SAME WAY FERNAND WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE Good lord this cutscene is pretty, thank god my emu has a pause function...

They look kinda cute together ngl

LOUD CHEERING!!!!

Thats the spirit!!! He must have had a self-confidence arc off screen

Okay so uh im going to bring attention to the VA here, cause holy shit that read was so good?!?!? like just before the line i heard him doing a small breath in-and-out to psyche himself up???? Like ough... the boy........

MEANWHILE

Damn, you know he is a Scary Guy when he gets a whole intro cutscene and also his own theme with a harpsichord. Only Serious Business with Berkut.

:3 Famous last words :3 Also Berkut's Theme is so fuckin good what???????

I see, so hes like Evil Sigurd Loves his wife and is evil

Oh boy I love being a fly on the wall!!! Such wonderful things I get to hear!

I mean, birth is unknown, he could be a lost prince or something, knowing FE.

*sneezes in SMT IV*

@beantothemax I THINK I NEED TO TELL BERKUT SOMETHING RIGHT THE FUCK NOW....

Anyways Fernand and Berkut are Instant Best Friends out of their Classism. Im glad that Fernand found someone to be friends with

Clive divorce arc...

HUH so rudolf is the king of the evil place I forget its name, Rudel??

Allllrighty! that cutscene was pretty dense, so ill leave the battle and post-battle stuff for another ask. REGARDLESS! Lets take a look at the battlefield!

...This is what youre using to defend the castle? that is kinda hilarious tbh.

Thought there would be more.

Ohhh boy that looks like its gonna be Fun.

I'm 99% sure the game wants me to try splitting up my team, but i really dont like doing that. So i'll try not. But i mean, we have the power of the turnwheel if things get hairy, soooooo

Anyways, lets begin the fight!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

BERKUT AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

RINEA AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

PRIDE AND ARROGANCE GOES HARDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

me going insane aside, that is my favorite cutscene in the game tbh, like animated cutscene. I also love Berkut and Rinea if you couldn't tell, evil sigurd is a really funny description, you're so right for that

And also, you're so right, the voice acting in this game is so fantastic, best in the series imo. Just you wait until you hear more Berkut, his voice acting actually goes so hard

Clives wife consoling him after Clives husband left him for a bigger classist

[papaziggy-devblog]

might i get some facts about our lovely lady counselors? the lads are neato but i wanna know more about all the queens at the camp

Some love for the WAMEN

Sophie:

She sings in the shower, but would be mortified if anyone caught her

Her favorite fruit is oranges

She fuckin loves both Teppanyaki and Hibachi style places

She sleeps like a rock, good luck waking her before she's ready to get up

She can sew really well, if you have a tear in your clothes or a ripped plush, shes the one to go to

She's spooked by thunder

But ironically loves rainy weather

She has a massive sweet tooth

She's afraid of needles

If she takes a bath instead of a shower it has to be a bubble bath... with scented candles

Cammi:

She has anxiety, but swallows it down and drowns it out by keeping herself busy

She hates hot weather

She'd 100% tell them you asked for no pickles

She hates olives

She could drink a whole gallon of apple juice on her own if you let her

She gets competitive with board games

She was on the track team in highschool

She's allergic to wasps

She's the only one in camp you wanna go to for first aid, she knows even more than Jazz

She's surprisingly tough, she says its from growing up with two brothers who liked to roughhouse

Jazz:

She's very athletic, her favorite sport is volleyball

She's also stupid good at swimming, she would have taken the role of lifeguard at the camp during swim time

She loves sour candy, if you wanna get on her good side bring her anything from sour patch kids to straight up citric acid

She knows she can be intimidating, but it's not on purpose, she promises.

She dyes her hair herself

She never finished highschool, but got her GED and some college

She runs on about 3-4 hours of sleep a day

She loves her job as head counselor, but is planning on stepping down to continue college

She's very straight and to the point, she doesn't like tiptoeing around things

Her biggest fear is going back to old habits

[butchjo]

hey ignore that fuckin bitch i think ur fursona is pretty neato :]

thank you! i sent them my fursona on purpose to see what theyd say, since my fursona is 99% accurate to what i look like irl. cant say im surprised that they responded like that, but ive had worse.