#fuck off with this university administration
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Post Canon! Yuuji wants to be a university student. He says that after all the war and loss he needs to catch up on rest and just be human- like the rest of them. He blames Nobara’s insatiable nagging about ‘finally being around people with taste’ and excuses it by saying that Megumi needs to find someone to love- whether the brooding guy wants it or not. However, in truth he misses the carefree school life. And he knows they all need a break from curses. So, after a lot of nagging from his side, the trio sent in their uni applications minutes before the deadline.
Post Canon! Yuuji is dead set on living his best life in the coming three years. To study “something” while attending every book and nerd club with Megumi, every frat party and adventure with Nobara, and hell, maybe show off some of his god-given sports skills he shunned in high school. After all, girls still dug that sort of thing even at uni- the entire ‘jocks’ and ‘athletes’ persona, right?!
Post Canon! Yuuji is determined to experience everything being a ‘normal guy’ could get him. He intends to make new friends, be social, live life and get laid as much as possible. Be single and date until he is sick of romance. But most importantly, he wants these three years to be about him, his wants, his needs, and to be a bit goddamn selfish for once.
At least, that is the plan he declares to his friends as they step onto campus, Nobara and Megumi rolling their eyes at him before heading to get their schedules. While Post Canon! Yuuji headed straight to the housing office because he’d rather be Sukuna’s vessel again than drive two hours daily from campus to the Jujutsu dorms.
Post Canon! Yuuji sees you, the administrative assistant so far from his usual type, and instantly knows his plans go straight out the window. He shuffles closer to you and the large desk you’re seated at, mouth dry and hands shaking like a teenager as he places his papers and ID on the table before you. He greets you with a shaky smile he hopes doesn’t look like a grimace. “H-Hi! I’m here for house- housing!” God, he sounds like such a noob.
Post Canon! Yuuji can’t help the genuine grin that splits his face as you flash him a look that so clearly reads ‘obviousely’ before typing away at the computer. The way you act instantly reminds him of Megumi and Nobara, and he feels more at ease around you.
Then, addressing him like an idiot feels familiar and almost like coming home: “Here is your copy of the contract and the key. You’re in the main dorms, in a single room on the second floor. recycling at the entrance, and the kitchen at the end of the same hall.” You explain, pointing out the location of his room on a map and then the location of the kitchen as if he was so helpless he wouldn’t be able to find it without your guidance.
“Anything else?” You ask yet it sounds more like a common phrase you utter, expecting a ‘no’ and turning back to your computer to prepare for the next poor sod with a task a glorified monkey could do
But Post Canon! Yuuji isn’t ready to let you go. He wants more of your attention, so he says the first thing on his mind; ”Aww, man, a dorm room? Are you sure? I-I mean, I’m certain I booked a flat!-” Yuji rushes to put on his biggest puppy dog eyes- the kind Nobara says makes him look like a wet dog- “Can you check again? Please? Me and my friends are not from around here, and If I’ve fucked up on housing- man they’ll kill me–” Yuuji rushes out a full-on water-works story, he’s even impressed with himself, maybe he should take up theatre.
Or not, but hey at least it keeps your attention on him.
Post Canon! Yuuji drinks in you and studies every feature of you. From the dark daggers you glare at him, then to the way your eyes grow mild with pity, to how you bite your lips in thought until he’s sure he’ll recognise you anywhere, just by your looks or voice alone.
“I’m sorry, you booked a dorm room, and no flats are available at the moment” you put on that fake work-voice that instantly makes Yuuji’s face fall. He likes your real voice- mean tone and all- a lot better.
Post Canon! Yuuji looks like a kicked puppy as he slowly gathers his stuff from your desk. He barely registers the look of surprise on your face, as if you expected him to talk back to you or pester you instead of politely accepting your words the way he does. But he notes how your expression shifts into hesitation and finally determination.
Post Canon! Yuuji is about to leave when you clear your throat to get his attention. Then, you lean over the desk separating, you two. “You know..” your voice is quiet, clearly not wanting the gathering students in the lobby to hear you, “Not all the apartment keys are gathered yet so there could still come in a cancellation in the next few days... you’re welcome by to check-”
Post Canon! Yuuji grins widely- the widest he has grinned in many years. “I’ll be here tomorrow!” he declares before being forced to leave your small office as your boss draws your attention away. But Yuuji swears to himself he will be there tomorrow, the day after, and the next day after. As long as it means he can talk to you, if only for a little bit.
But first,Post Canon! Yuuji needs to figure out what to do if he actually gets a flat through you. Could he bribe Nobara and Megumi to share the costs with him? Maybe post a ‘room for rent’ ad?
Ohh, well, Post Canon! Yuuji decides, with a skip in his step, he’ll cross that bridge when he gets there. After all, he reasons, you have to do some insane things for love, right?!
Author note: Thank you so so much, @ravester, for asking for a Yuuji-centric post canon hcs I hope this meets your expectations <3
And for the rest of the wonderful readers, what do you think? We have a Megumi one and a Yuuji one, do we need a Nobara one as well?
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All fics are unique works by ©ravencincaide 2024. Do not copy/repost/translate or spread my work(s) without my explicit permission. If you see any of my work(s) reworked/reposted/copied anywhere, please inform me!
#Yuuji#itadori yuji#jjk x reader#yuuji x you#yuuji x y/n#jjk x yn#jujutsu kaisen x reader#itadori yuuji#megumi fushiguro#megumi#nobara#itadori#yuuji x reader#jujutsu kaisen#jjk yuuji#jjk spoilers#yuji x reader#jjk fanfic#jujutsu kaisen headcanons#jujutsu kaisen hcs#yuuji headcanon#jujutsu itadori#yuji itadori#jjk itadori#itadori x reader#jjk yuji#jjk headcanons#jjk hcs#jjk fluff#jujutsu kaisen x you
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this college is actually beyond parody
#fuck poor students right? fuck international students right? fuck people who just want to stay in dorms right? fuck off lol#surely a university system with multibillion dollar budget AND endowment can afford to build housing right?#NOPE! we're paying our bloated administrative staff more instead lol#i dont even live in campus housing but this shit makes me so angry. it would please me greatly to see these people hurt and ruined
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I was punched and pepper sprayed by cops that my university administration set on student protesters yesterday. Including once where a cop ripped my mask off my face, grabbed my jaw, and sprayed pepper sprayed straight into my mouth. The university sent out an alert in the middle of our protest canceling classes for the rest of the day, only citing “adverse conditions”. After protesters dispersed under threat of even more violence and three buses of riot police from all over the state with rubber bullets and bully sticks parked in front of one our school’s famous landmarks. I staggered over to a couple of friends who were watching on the sidelines. They gave me water and an apple and held a bag of ice on my very pepper spray irritated face. As they were walking me back to my dorm we ran into one of their roommates. She had taken cancelled classes as an opportunity to get crumbl cookie with her friends. Standing in front of her, happy in a floral blouse with her box of cookies, in my pepper spray and water soaked tshirt, keffiyeh sadly hanging off my shoulder, holding an ice pack to my mouth, felt like a slap in the face.
After putting my pepper spray soaked clothes, shoes, and keffiyeh in a plastic bag and taking an extraordinarily painful shower, a friend and I went for dinner just off campus. There we had a pot of green tea and ramen to soothe pepper sprayed throats. We got ice cream after (shared a cup with chocolate and raspberry pomegranate with strawberry pieces on top, it was very good). From our spot outside the ice cream place we watched a steady stream of groups of sorority girls in matching jeans shorts and blue bikini tops walking back to their apartments after some apparently raucous parties. The cognitive dissonance was insane. I really felt a little like I was going crazy.
Even this morning, waking up to the smeared sharpie of the National Lawyer’s Guild’s phone number on my arm, a black and blue chest from where a grown man straight up clocked me while I was held up by two other protesters in a wall, and a still sore throat and eyes from the pepper spray, life goes on like normal. I still have final papers to write and a math exam to review for.
I’m not sure I really have a point. But, this feeling only makes me want to fight harder for a free Palestine. So, fuck Israel for being an apartheid state and all of their crimes over the last 76 years. Fuck university administration for not disclosing their level of investment in Israel. Fuck university administration for not divesting from this genocide. Fuck Joe Biden for actively supporting this genocide. And fuck the police.
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My college has kicked everyone out of the main dining hall for the entire weekend so that somebody can host a banquet in there. This includes the kitchen staff, other than the ones setting up the banquet, which means all the specialized areas, including the allergy-free area, the pizza ovens, and the ice cream machine and freezers (less important but the most popular thing in the entire dining hall) are completely off-limits. This is our only functioning dining hall on campus. Technically we have two, but the second one is only called a dining hall because it has access to the main one, not because it can function on its own. It's used, fun fact, mainly as event space, like banquets, and is not designed to be the main dining hall for 1500 kids. It can't even physically fit the entirety of the crowds that come at the busy times of the day!
But nope. Why would a college halfway to the brink of failure due to, among other things, incredibly bad relations between the students and ground-level staff and the administration, consider doing something that won't anger the student body even more? That's just absurd!
#god#the administration of this place is a fucking nightmare#its main thing has been completely ignoring the entire regular populace's suggestions about how to run the school#then implementing the thing everyone told them not to and being shocked it went badly#and also not doing anything we do want them to do#I think the best point of this in miniature is the fact one of the student center doors came off its hinges in late september or so#and all that's gotten is a sign saying 'don't use'#while they moved the entire school store into that same building in under a month new sign mannequins and everything#my personal most hated thing though is that two of the outdoor ramp rails have rusted out their support poles to the point they don't#connect to the ground there anymore. one of their crosswalk signs did this too and luckily that got fixed by replacing the rusted out parts#and only those. partially rusty is fine#and one of the emergency phones— the farthest one from any others— has been broken for longer than I've been here with no expectation of#being replaced or repaired.#and all the crosswalks are so worn they're gone. not almost gone. most of these are lucky to have any paint left near the edges of the road#they're Gone#our current student president won with a campaign of 'us before the system' against the incumbent president#unfortunately this is one of the best schools in my country for my major and the only one half decent under $40000 a year#and the students and faculty are great. Administration is just such a shitshow#so I'm staying assuming the place doesn't shut down within my four years#umf#university of maine at farmington
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PARAMOUR ⋆✦⋆ hoshina soshiro
synopsis ➸ hoshina is used to getting strange messages as a well-known member of the defense force, but a sexy photo from a random number really catches him off guard. what starts as something casual soon becomes an obsession
tags ➸ strangers to lovers, male mastúrbation, semi-public sèx, dirty talking, bíting, rough séx, manhandling, fingêring, sqùirting, cunnìlingus, overstimúlation, unprotected sèx, multiple orgàsms, spánking, anàl fingèring, hair pulling, slight asphýxiation
wc ➸ 9.1k
The deafening silence of the empty office pressed in on Soshiro from all sides like a smothering weight. He let out an audible groan, dropping his forehead into his upturned palm as boredom gnawed at his already frayed nerves.
Seriously, what fresh hell was this endless stack of paperwork even for?
He eyed the precarious towers of manila folders and disheveled reports littering his desk - each one housing enough dull legalese and procedural jumbo to induce the kind of brain-melting boredom even seasoned bureaucrats would balk at. Fuck, at this point he'd almost welcome a random kaiju attack in the middle of downtown just for the sheer distraction.
At least kicking some oversized lizard's ass would briefly scratch that primal itch simmering beneath his skin - the one begging for furious physicality, adrenaline, and the raw thrill of combat after weeks trapped behind this goddamn desk.
A humorless chuckle rumbled up from Soshiro's broad chest at the mere thought. Yeah, because getting flattened into a fine red mist by a rampaging leviathan's club-sized fists was definitely preferable to revisiting the third subsection of this month's payroll audit one more...fucking...time...
He squeezed his eyes shut and dragged both calloused palms down his stubble-lined jawline, barely restraining the urge to howl out his rising frustrations to the empty room. This shit was supposed to be a means to an end - a temporary detour strengthening his administrative credentials. Not some sadistic exercise in lobotomizing his last shreds of patience and morale with each passing hour.
Just as the thought crossed his mind to start browsing apartment listings for some remote mountain monastery, a sudden shrill beep sliced through the stifling silence like a thunderclap.
Soshiro jolted ramrod straight in his creaky desk chair, hand instinctively whipping out to snatch up his vibrating cellphone with the honed reflexes of a lifelong combatant. Eyes narrowed and hyper-focused, he scanned the bright display with a mixture of apprehension and deeply buried need for some, any external stimuli to crack this stagnant purgatory wide open.
12:37 AM...
So much for that hoped-for kaiju attack interruption. It seemed a mundane text notification would have to scratch that itch for now, no matter how minuscule. He swiped his thumb across the illuminated screen to reveal the sender—and felt his brows knitting together in a bemused frown.
Unknown Number?
Well, that was...unusual, to say the least. The mysterious digits blinked up at him innocently from the display, unlisted sender with zero context beyond those stark alphanumerics. No name, no identifying icon or thumbnail - absolutely no context whatsoever to indicate whether this could be a legitimate communique from JAKDF command or, at worst...spam?
Despite himself, Soshiro's curiosity spiked as he stared down the glowing text preview like a viper coiled to strike. With little else capturing his rapt attention at present, solving the mystery of this bizarre late-night message had suddenly become priority numero uno.
Besides, you never knew - maybe the universe was feeling generous and decided to toss him an intriguing lure during this agonizing dry spell after all? A tempting breadcrumb leading somewhere far more tantalizing than dredging through paperwork until his mind liquefied completely?
Curiosity rapidly snowballing into outright temptation, Soshiro swiped open the strange notification before rational thought could intervene. He barely registered the loading symbol flickering across the display precursor before—
"What the everloving fuck..."
The sibilant curse punched through his parted lips of its own accord as his vision abruptly swam with eddies of smooth, unmarred skin. Shapely feminine curves blurred together in tantalizing motion across the small screen - a tangled vista of exposed backs and sensual valleys utterly devoid of context beyond sheer gratuitous indecency.
That is, until Soshiro's stare honed in on the breathtaking centerpiece with visceral intensity and everything fell into deliriously filthy place.
There, brazenly showcased against the dimness of some half-glimpsed bedroom backdrop, the gloriously unobstructed view of a stranger's pert little ass packed into lacy crimson lingerie flooded his senses with molten lust. His mouth went instantly dry as the tantalizing hint of a matching negligee top riding up hinted at the feminine bounty lying just out of eyeshot overhead.
It wasn't just some indiscriminate thirst trap or porno clip blasted to his device...no, this was clearly a meticulously framed personal photo angled with lush, sensual deliberation for maximum impact. Soshiro found his hungry gaze skating down the indecent thigh gap and sleek inward curves with unstoppable greed despite himself.
Just as he gulped down a fresh inhale to reestablish equilibrium, the glowing words accompanying the scandalous photo finally swam back into focus at last.
Wait! Oh god, I'm so so so sorry! I didn't mean to send that to this number, please delete right aw—
Soshiro couldn't bite back his derisive snort quickly enough, already envisioning the startled panic blossoming on his mystery admirer's flushed features. How precious...his angelic little minx was simply begging for forgiveness after doling out such glorious sin completely unbidden, wasn't she?
Well, far be it for him to disappoint such a winsome supplicant desperate for penance. With a few deft taps, he fired off a response dripping with his signature insouciance and devil-may-care mirth. Can't rattle the cage too harshly too soon, after all...not when such interesting prey was already slipping into his web of its own delicious volition.
You know, most girls avoid sending nudes to randoms like the plague. I'd hate to think my night's entertainment was a total accident...
Send. Soshiro leaned back in his squeaky desk chair with a lewd grin painted across his rugged mug, shamelessly giving the scandalous photo one more unhurried perusal in all its provocative glory before clicking the save button.
His appreciation of feminine beauty aside, a delicious new game had fallen into Soshiro's lap - one he had no intention of dismissing so easily, not when the howling boredom had left him starved for stimulation. With a low hum of simmering relish, he swirled the scotch beside his overflowing inbox patiently, waiting to see how this encounter would unfurl.
The reply pinged through quicker than expected, those same mystery digits blinking across his lockscreen accompanied by a fresh message preview:
Well if you insist on holding me hostage... maybe return the favor so we're not total strangers? ;)
Soshiro couldn't quite suppress the rakish grin tugging at the corner of his lips as he swiped the notification open. So his coy little minx was feeling emboldened after the impromptu nude's unintended delivery, was she? Doubling down on baiting him into an equal display rather than beating a hasty retreat with her tail between her legs?
He had to give the girl credit - she definitely had a spark of audacity burning beneath all that stammered apology. A fact that only served to stoke the rising flames of Soshiro's prurient interest more intensely. After all, what was life without chasing down the occasional daring conquest to really get one's blood pumping hot and hard?
Rather than firing off a response, Soshiro leaned back in his desk chair and allowed his burning gaze to slowly wander back up toward the scandalous photo still illuminating his device's display. That flawless expanse of soft skin sculpted over those delicious feminine curves...the lush crimson lace cupping such an exquisite ass it practically deserved to be bronzed...god, he could perfectly picture palming every lush inch while grinding his throbbing—
A tiny grunt of arousal nearly punched free before he could bite the sound down. Soshiro shifted subtly, suddenly and keenly aware of the uncomfortable tightness rapidly straining against the front of his trousers with every heated exhalation.
Fucking hell...just the sight of this random thirst trap was already fully capable of reducing him to white-knuckled want like some overeager virgin again? What strange power did his mysterious online woman wield to already have him half-delirious without even so much as a face or name to attach those stunning assets to?
Still, even as his smirk deepened with rueful self-awareness, Soshiro found himself cradling his swiftly swelling cock through the fabric with his free palm. He shamelessly drank in the image anew, allowing the full effect of such raw, lush indecency to blossom in heated flushes across his skin.
Just watching that tempting bounce of ass cradled in those clinging crimson ribbons was enough to make pre-cum drool from his straining tip already. To reduce the normally unshakable monster hunter to such a pathetic, needy state pulsing with single-minded longing.
And wasn't that just the bitter irony of it all? After countless brushes with the most catastrophic behemoths to ever tread this earth, finally some faceless online tart had him untethered and howling for relief like a bitch in heat...all because she'd slipped him a tantalizing peek at her sweet little body wrapped up in silk and sin with no thought beyond teasing him mindless, surely.
Well...two could play at that particular game of torment, couldn't they? Because Soshiro wasn't one to leave any challenge unanswered once the gauntlet of temptation was thrown...no matter how salacious the battlefield.
With a few decisive swipes of his thumb, he typed out a reply already dripping with dark promise:
Careful now...you don't want to go whetting a strange man's appetite without being fully prepared for the consequences, little one. Why don't you keep those pretty pics coming and we'll see if you're entertaining enough to earn your peek later...?
Soshiro could only imagine the scandalized shiver rippling down his anonymous admirer's spine at his blatant disregard for propriety. Could picture the hunger dawning behind those wide, naive eyes as she realized this hunt had found its predator ready to prowl regardless of innocence or intent.
Grinning like the wolf he was, Soshiro fired off the challenge before sliding his free hand down to fully unfasten his belt buckle. The telltale hiss of leather parting and metal clanking punctuated the sudden silence like a thunderclap. He didn't even try to stifle the groan of relief surging through him as he popped his swollen cock free of its confines.
God, the mere anticipation of watching his little mystery slut send even more scandalous pictures had him painfully rigid...aching with the sheer need to thrust into something warm and wet and tight. Something that would milk his heavy cock for all it was worth until he exploded into ecstatic release and stained that perfect skin with his filthy, sticky claim.
Shameless, depraved fantasies aside, Soshiro knew it was far more satisfying to draw this little game out with slow, calculated precision. To make his unknown admirer dance in just the right way before offering the ultimate reward of a face and name to put behind those tempting curves and sinful lingerie.
Besides, a little patience would make the eventual payoff all the more savory, wouldn't it?
The rhythmic tapping of Soshiro's pen ricocheted off the office walls with maddening consistency once more, each percussive beat drilling deeper into his skull. He squinted down at the seemingly endless cascade of forms and files proliferating across his desk in fresh waves - the mere sight enough to rekindle that special breed of existential torture reserved solely for bureaucratic busywork.
At least this time around, a delicious new distraction kindled in the back of his mind like the cherry-red ember of a cigarette glowing defiant in the gloom.
His mystery online admirer had fallen conspicuously silent since their heated exchange the previous evening. No response to his boldly suggestive demand for further entertainment, no follow-up photos teasing the identity behind that world-class ass shot seared into the backs of his eyelids whenever they drifted shut.
Still, the blessed anticipation of further correspondence made each in terminable hour hunched over these godforsaken requisitions just a little more bearable. The potential for some wicked mischief to unravel amidst the tedium sat there like a baited hook, only needing to be set and reeled with the right provocation...
A wry grin tugged at the corner of Soshiro's mouth as the notion solidified. Why not test those tantalizing waters and see if his conquest could be lured out from whatever shadows she currently stalked? Give the poor girl's nerves one more tweak to see if sparks flew in either direction again?
With a few deft strides across his cramped office quarters, Soshiro freed his cellphone from where it rested on the windowsill and thumbed open the strangers' thread without preamble. The suggestive photo she'd teased him with the night before winked up at him from the display impishly, daring him to indulge in another lascivious perusal and rekindle those delicious embers of want.
Smirking despite himself, Soshiro wasted no time in firing off a barb of his own in retaliation:
You know, a guy could start feeling insecure when his favorite anonymous admirer deprives him of their...artistic talents for so long at a time. Figured you just got cold feet about properly entertaining me again later tonight?
He punctuated the deliberate provocation with a few choice emojis - tongue poked out in saucy challenge beside the peach icon for good measure. Let the girl chew on the not-so-subtle reminders of what scorching delights awaited should she decide to keep pushing those buttons purposefully.
The response was nearly instantaneous, buzzing through with a lively ding that kickstarted Soshiro's pulse instantly:
Lol yeah right you wish! For all I know you're just some wrinkly old perv fapping to me behind that screen...what makes you think you've earned another show after that?
He barked out an audible laugh at the saucy rejoinder, already eagerly firing back another round:
Guilty as charged on that second part, although I can promise my appreciation for the female form hasn't dulled with age one bit. As for earning my keep though...? That's exactly why I keep asking nicely for you to come up with some better reference material, babe. Gotta be prepared in case you live up to my wildest hopes after all...
The banter flowed like a raging current between them after that, punctuated by lulls where Soshiro could practically envision his mysterious chat partner stewing in feverish consternation over what salacious retort to fling back into the fray next. All the while, his eyes kept skating back to that tantalizing photo as if magnetized - drinking in the sumptuous lines and valleys with helpless relish as his neglected cock rapidly swelled.
Before his mind could fully register the passage of time, Soshiro's wristwatch began chirping out the late hour. Startled, he glanced at the device in shock - only to find nearly an entire evening had fled by in the blink of an eye while their flirtatious volleys dragged him deeper and deeper into temptation's swirling vortex.
Around him, stacks of overlooked paperwork blanketed every conceivable surface like the fallout of some administrative apocalypse. The forgotten chaos was a stark reminder of just how thoroughly this torrid game of tease and chase had eclipsed every other distraction vying for his attention mere hours ago.
Yet despite the damning wake of unfinished busywork surrounding him, Soshiro couldn't quite muster the appropriate shame or regret over being so thoroughly derailed yet again. Not when the hunger gnawing at the pit of his belly felt so sweetly sated for once - if only by the mere prospect of his sultry correspondent finally revealing her true tantalizing colors in the flesh rather than suggestive neon...
He sank back against the desk's unforgiving edge with a ragged sigh, absently palming the impressive swell tenting his pants shamelessly. There'd be no blissfully obliterating climax to cap off the evening's indecencies tonight, he acknowledged - not without a few more chess moves needing to play out first amid this deliciously charged stalemate.
But the sweet anticipation of that final reckoning, of bending this faceless siren to his whims and uncovering whether she was truly worth his deepening ardor? Why, that singular promise alone would sustain Soshiro through a thousand more agonizing, soul-sucking paper prisons if required.
After all, he wasn't some wet-behind-the-ears ingenue to be so easily caught up in a few torrid heat waves and saucy nothings fired across the digital ether. No, he was a creature of focus and discipline honed to an unyielding edge through endless trials of mind and body alike.
So the mere fact that this mysterious hedonist had already captivated his attentions so thoroughly was worth every second of unbearable restraint flexed...for now. Until the dam inevitably cracked and every unspoken longing could be drowned out in the rapturous floodwaters they'd summoned together with each lurid photo and breathy promise whispered out across the glowing night.
The digital flashing of the bedside clock seared 3:17 AM into Soshiro's bleary vision as he blinked himself awake yet again. A ragged sigh rattled up from his chest while he scrubbed both palms over his stubbly jawline in aggravation.
Another goddamn sleepless night starring down the barrel of his cellphone like an addict seeking that next hit of delirious, addictive sin...
Except his particular vice took the form of whispered indecencies typed out in rapidfire beside the tantalizing bounce of a strangers' ass packed into skimpy red lace. The image alone was practically tattooed behind his eyelids at this point despite the weeks having slipped by since its fateful arrival.
With a low growl, Soshiro rolled over onto his side and thumbed open his phone's lockscreen to reveal that familiar thread glowing from the display. Sure enough, those same mystery digits blinked up at him innocently amid the suggestive emoji exchanges and playful taunts that had rapidly become his sole beacon during the tedium of long, empty nights.
A tendril of frustrated heat coiled low in his abdomen as he gave the photo one more relentless perusal from top to bottom. How many more agonizing nocturnal hours had slipped by with his calloused palm chafing over his aching cock to this lone cherished trophy while sweating through fevered fantasies about getting his mouth all over those tantalizing curves in the flesh?
Too damn many to tally, that was for certain. And all without a single new breadcrumb to stoke these relentless hungers further beyond her unashamed goading and the occasional saucy comeback fired off across the digital divide.
A sudden volley of renewed buzzing from the device clutched in his free hand made Soshiro's eyes blow wide with a startling clarity. There it was again - the telltale signal of his elusive siren resurfacing to tease and taunt in equal measure no matter the hour.
He didn't bother checking the incoming missive at first, content to simply drag the moment out as long as humanly possible. To savor the frissons of electric expectation crackling over every hypersensitive nerve ending while his thumb hovered over the notification icon.
Whatever delirious promises or filthy demands awaited this time, Soshiro would commit each syllable to memory like divine scripture before inevitably spiraling further down the lust-maddened rabbit hole keeping his addict's hungers in perpetual torment...
My my, somebody's grinding that axe pretty hard again this evening, aren't they? Just couldn't resist seeing if I'm still in heat for you...?
There it was - that same impertinent lilt wrapped around every irreverent turn of phrase that made Soshiro's spent cock twitch with renewed interest. He pictured her pretty lips curved around those brazen taunts with dark amusement, lush and kiss-swollen from his attentions while coy innocence swam in her siren's stare despite the increasingly indecent game taking shape.
I figured you'd lost my number by now, baby. A girl could start getting insecure if her biggest fan went totally dark for days like this...
He fired back the retort immediately, eager to goad her into leaning into the charged heat steadily building between their forms once more across the miles. Wasn't often he encountered somebody so thoroughly game to trade blistering salvos without breaking stride.
On the contrary, gorgeous...felt like giving you breathing room before my thirst started feeling too heavy to bear. Figured you could use a break from me obsessing over that sweet little peach in your last shot.
Thankfully, her saucy reply was instantaneous - complete with a choice peach emoji of her own that made Soshiro's cock pulse between his thighs eagerly.
Awww, how considerate of you handsome! But you must know by now there's no such thing as 'too thirsty' for this lil peach when it's earned the privilege ;) I'd say we're WELL past due for you to sample the fruit while it's still ripe for the picking...
Soshiro swallowed hard, already picturing the scene with visceral intensity - him pinning that perfect, shapely ass down onto his tongue to suck and lave worship into every lush crease and sinful fold while she came undone above him. So lost to rapture that those taunting words melted into litanies of shattered prayer under his relentless tongue...
A sharp trill from the distress alarm made him startle abruptly from the spiraling fantasy, blistering promises already curling across his frayed psyche like lush vines. With an indelible groan of deepest resignation, Soshiro dragged himself upright and off the mattress to retrieve the summons that could only mean one inevitability.
Duty calls...again. Of-fucking-course it did.
The acrid stench of smoke and residual chemicals clung to Soshiro's sweat-damp form like a noxious shroud as he stalked away from the smoldering wreckage. Shrugging out of his suit's top layer, he gulped down deep, ravenous lungfuls of the cool night air in a vain bid to flush the bitter aftertaste of industrialized ruin from his mouth.
Mission success, at least on their end - the kaiju contained and any trapped civilians successfully evacuated before shit hit the fan. Soshiro chanced a glance over his shoulder at the ravaged factory and the kaiju carcass being meticulously cordoned off and documented by the cleaners. Just another harrowing Monday night at the defense force, really.
God, he couldn't wait to scrub the stench from his pores and collapse into some semblance of a recharge before inevitably being summoned topside again. Maybe he'd even get to avoid any further bullshit detours lobbed his way for once tonight...
"Hoshina!"
The sharp bark of his captain's voice sliced across the makeshift staging area, shattering that naive respite before it could fully take root. With a resigned sigh, Soshiro turned to find Mina waving him over from where she conferred with the medic lieutenant. Of course...he really should've known better, shouldn't he?
"Got a final errand for you before you check out," Ashiro rasped out without preamble as soon as he drew within earshot. "Low priority, but Arashi could use an extra hand to see one of the evacuees squared safely away. Downtown address, probably nothing more than a five-minute shuttle."
She passed him a folded slip of paper that Soshiro took automatically, already anticipating a protest bubbling up from his wearied bones. Only the full weight of Ashiro's expectant look gave him pause - because damned if the woman didn't have a preternatural way of dismantling his gruff impulses to reckless defiance before they could even unfurl fully.
Still...a damn glorified taxi service tonight of all nights? When they'd just survived another raging monster while scores of their boys risked permanent lung damage in the chemical factory? Soshiro felt the muscle in his jaw tighten imperceptibly as reason warred with the ingrained soldier's discipline inculcated over decades in the field.
Ashiro seemed to read his burgeoning objection plain as day across his set features. Before he could voice it brazenly, she stepped closer and pinned him with a pointed look from beneath her disheveled bangs.
"Look, I get it - this detour seems small after the clusterfuck you just hauled us through," she murmured, just loud enough for his ears alone. The candid solidarity laced around her normally brusque tone gave Soshiro pause once more.
"But this particular civilian..." Ashiro paused before continuing more quietly, regret pulling at the creases around her mouth. "Let's just say they've had about as shit luck as any of us trudging through that hazardous waste tonight. A bit of consideration beyond our call of duty ain't exactly gonna kill you, now is it?"
Soshiro stared back evenly for a long moment, unsure of how to parse the vague implication underscoring her simple request yet unable to dismiss it cavalierly all the same. At length, he broke eye contact with a curt nod and made to turn on his heel.
"Should've known you'd never steer me wrong, captain..." he rasped, already orienting toward the nearby transport vehicle that would complete his obligation. "I'll see our stray home safe and be back before morning briefs start...long as they don't decide to make themselves too difficult."
For some reason, a faint smile seemed to tug at the corners of Ashiro's expression at that proclamation. But all she offered was a brisk "good to know" before dismissing him to his task without further elucidation.
Not that Soshiro wasted too many brain cells lingering on her cryptic reassurances anyway. No, with the prospect of a solid night's rest twinkling before him like a shining beacon, his churning thoughts had already veered toward more...salacious distractions lying in wait.
Specifically the luscious little siren who'd been haunting his restless nights with a relentless drip-feed of illicit photos and ever more suggestive taunts volleyed across the digital ether at all hours. His fiery temptress who remained utterly shrouded in mystery beyond the tantalizing hints of feminine curves spilling over from lingerie or the occasional flashes of soft skin, tormenting him with what he still couldn't claim despite months of breathless pining.
But soon...oh so very soon if the unspoken promise lingered in her most recent teasing salvo. Soshiro refused to believe that their game of increasingly sinful escalation could continue on indefinitely, not with the way her messages had taken on an insistent urgency as if stoking the smolder of each imminent collision.
The real question was, would Soshiro expend his considerable resolve to ignore her unanswered provocation until they next crossed orbits? Or would he break down first to text her some lewd goad, unable to stand being rendered even temporarily adrift of her siren's attentions for another night longer?
He'd just settled into the grimy shuttle's cab, already reaching for his cellphone tucked in his pants pocket when his eyes flickered over the expectant figure seated across from him amid the vehicle's gloom. Soshiro felt his formerly resolute focus rupture completely as all context scattered from his muddled psyche at the sight of the woman staring straight back at him with undisguised pique.
You...
He knew those pouty, lush lips immediately despite the shadows obscuring most of your figure - the same pillowed contours that had starred across countless lurid photos fired off without context nor identity attached. The exact sumptuous mouth that promised to lave unrestrained worship across his cock in delirious soliloquies whenever he tormented himself with those forbidden snapshots late into the night...
As if magnetized, Soshiro's unblinking crimson stare roamed over the rest of your features in a slow, scorching perusal. That flawless visage and familiar cheekbones so tantalizingly obscured across his grainy camera roll now sprang into sublime clarity before him. And those molten eyes, blazing with unabashed annoyance and challenge in equal measure from beneath thick sooty lashes...
It couldn't be, and yet the impossible truth slammed into Soshiro with the force of a physical blow, stealing his labored breaths despite himself. Because somehow...some way...his indecently worshipped digital goddess had manifested into the flesh right before his stunned senses.
A shrill chirp from his jacket shattered the weighted trance, alerting him to another text undoubtedly languishing from his torrid muse amidst the darkness. Yet there was no need to check the sender ident now - not when Soshiro had finally placed the alluring pieces into their deliriously complete puzzle at last.
Your head swiveled sharply at the sudden vibration, irises flaring wide before locking onto his transfixed stare with that same razor edge he'd hungrily committed to fantasy. The undisguised surprise mingling with the annoyance etched across your striking features made Soshiro's mouth go instantly dry.
"Well?" you huffed out that smoky alto woven of sin and temptation itself, upper lip curling into a petulant sneer as he drank you in helplessly. "Are you just gonna sit there staring at me like a creep all night? Or do you plan on telling me why in the hell I'm being detained after getting checked over for—"
Soshiro couldn't bite back the low, rasping chuckle that punched free from his broad chest before you could finish your indignant diatribe. He watched in mounting delight as confusion and shock rippled over your stunning visage in turn, replacing the fiery censure with naked befuddlement.
Rather than giving voice to the thousand fevered thoughts whirling through his muddled consciousness, Soshiro allowed his eyes to drift down your seated form deliberately. To roam over the sumptuous curves cradled by those snug little skirt and lush thighs splayed carelessly before him with open greed.
And there, positioned at the perfect vantage point to torment and tempt from the shadows, winked that unmistakably familiar glint of rose-gold metal clinging to the subtle flare of your hip. He locked on the stylishly sleek phone case with ravenous intensity, as if mesmerized by the scant glimpses of lingerie-clad flesh all over again for the first time.
Only now, the reality of his indecent muse's identity grounded the feverish imaginings into sublime truth made manifest before him. That sinful soliloquy would drip straight from your plush lips with tangible smokiness rather than mere pixels spun into fantasy across dimly lit screens...
You bristled as that low, heady laugh swelled anew in response to his ravenous assessment. Every line of your body tightened, drawing his eye inexorably from the elegant column of your throat down to the gentle swell of cleavage unintentionally accentuated beneath thin cotton.
"Okay buddy, I'm not sure what your deal is here," you snapped, crossing your arms defensively over your chest in a subconscious flare of modesty. "But if you don't knock off the creeper staring contest in about three seconds, I'll—"
But Soshiro cut off your indignant threat with a few precise strides forward into the shuttles cramped interior. Your eyes blew comically wide as he loomed into your space without ceremony or preamble, forcing you to crane your neck back to meet his piercing ruby regard from beneath shuttered lashes.
"Careful now, sweet cheeks," he rumbled, pitching his voice into that liquid velvet rasp that made you visibly shudder despite yourself. "Can't go making threats like that against the Vice Commander of one of the city's finest frontline combat division, now can you?"
He watched your throat work convulsively on a sharp inhalation, entire body tensed as every muscle hummed with sudden hyper-awareness. Yet rather than retreating or shrinking beneath his implacable proximity, you seemed to draw every ounce of sultry defiance forward in one single glare of molten incredulity.
"You've got to be kidding me..." you rasped out in naked disbelief. "There's no way you're—"
"Hoshina Soshiro, in the scorching flesh after being subjected to your torments day in and out," he crooned, deliberately pitching each word into the lower registers that stroked over your hypersensitive nerve endings. "Although I have to say...not a single nude or vulgar emoji barrage could ever hope to capture how utterly exquisite you are up close like this, gorgeous."
At last, blessed recognition dawned behind your widening eyes alongside the flickering embers of unmistakable heat. Soshiro watched with relish as your spine straightened from its defensive hunch, shoulders squaring instinctively as you studied him with ravenous consideration anew.
"Then I have to say, you put those brooding hero shots all over the news to absolute shame, stud..." you murmured with a subtle shift closer to his looming silhouette that drew a predatory growl from somewhere deep in Soshiro's chest.
He responded by closing the remaining distance until your parted thighs cradled his muscular bulk with barely a sliver of space for propriety between. Threading one meaty palm into the lustrous tresses cascading down your back, Soshiro tilted your head until your gazes locked and mingled harsh breaths in the electric divide.
"Well then," he husked against the velvet pout of your lips with molten promise flowing from his tongue at last. "Now that the masks have fallen completely...how about we get this firestorm started properly for once, kitten?"
You swayed into his hulking frame with infinite grace, nose brushing his in a deliberate tease that made his engorged cock throb between clenched thighs. Yet rather than finally bridging that last electrified inch, you simply cracked one corner of your mouth higher in a smile sharp enough to sunder atoms.
"Mmm...thought you'd never ask," you purred, smoky voice caressing over Soshiro's nerves like a physical brand.
Unable to resist claiming a taste after so many agonizing nights spent fantasizing, he surged forward to seal his mouth over yours in a searing glide. You moaned shamelessly into the velvet heat of his insistent tongue delving between your parted lips to plunder and map every slick crevice with greedy fervor.
"Fuck..." Soshiro groaned without breaking the filthy glide of your mingled breaths. "Taste even sweeter than I imagined, baby girl."
He punctuated the growled praise by dragging you forward with the hand fisted in your silken hair. Your plush chest crushed against the sleek bulwark of his torso as your throats undulated in shared rapture, allowing zero space for propriety to linger between your rapidly aligning forms.
"Easy there..." you managed to pant out against the scorching brand of his mouth, all honeyed sin. "We've still got a few things to sort out before the real fun even starts..."
Soshiro snarled wordlessly in response, free hand snapping out to cinch around the lush flare of your hip and grind your molten cores together mercilessly. The delirious friction of your bodies sliding in sinful tandem made you both keen out twin whimpers of blissful torment.
Rather than relent beneath the bruising onslaught of Soshiro's feverish demands, you allowed one elegant fingernail to trail from the nape of his neck all the way down the bulwark of carved granite at his nape. Every flex and shiver of tensed muscle rippling beneath your teasing caress drew a fresh hiss through his gritted teeth.
"Like...how does a sweet little tease like me end up on your very important list for playing naughty delivery girl, hmm?" you purred against the heated line of his stubbled jaw, eyelashes fluttering against his cheek deliciously. "Last I checked, my selfie skills didn't quite qualify as acts of civic duty, handsome..."
Soshiro allowed himself to be tugged into the sensual sway of your taunting seduction, relishing how every sultry note bleeding from those honeyed lips seemed to vibrate straight through to his throbbing length grinding against your soaked heat at last. When your mouth skated over his in a ghosting brush, teeth raking his bottom lip in passing, his ragged groan punched up from somewhere primordial stirring awake in his abdomen at last.
"Your guess is as good as mine, gorgeous," he husked against the sinful pout you presented like forbidden fruit begging to be devoured. "Although if you really think I'm gonna waste the first taste of this sweet pussy on dull conversation..."
He emphasized the vow by slamming his hips up against yours in a visceral grind, fitting the swollen ridge of his cock directly between your molten folds with devastating friction. You jolted against him with a shattered whimper, head lolling back in unmistakable ecstasy as every lush curve undulated with rising fever.
"Then you've got another thing coming, don't you kitten?" Soshiro growled with merciless intent, already shucking his jacket down over his forearms to free up hands dedicated solely to mapping out all your most scorching hollows in graphic worship.
Before you could peel back another insolent retort, he sealed his mouth over the frantic thrum of your pulse and sank his teeth into the soft skin of your neck in a vicious bite. The sound that ripped from your chest could only be described as a keening howl, torn free as if by force and ringing throughout the small space.
Soshiro's answering snarl of savage victory was muffled against your neck as his fingers clawed into the plush flesh of your thighs and forced them wide in one brutal shove. In response, you simply curled your calves around the hard slab of his lower back, anchoring him into place with no room to spare between your joined bodies.
"Fucking hell, baby girl..." he ground out through clenched teeth as you rocked and writhed against his grinding cock, seeking friction like a mindless creature. "If this is your way of trying to get me fired...it's fucking working."
"Not...trying anything..." you managed to gasp out in broken fragments, eyes rolling back in their sockets with every roll of his hips grinding his bulging arousal directly over the soaking fabric of your panties. "Just...fuck...wanted...to give my hero a proper thank you for—"
"By teasing the ever loving shit outta me all these weeks?" Soshiro bit off with another punishing rock of his hips that punched a breathless cry from your chest. "I'd call this a downright hostile fucking reception, princess. So tell me...how do you plan on making it up to me?"
As he spoke, one hand slid around the curve of your hip and dove beneath the elastic of your panties to stroke the molten slit of your folds directly. Your choked off moan echoed through the small space, accompanied by a fresh flood of molten arousal drenching the pad of his index finger and the sensitive flesh around it.
"Holy fuck...soaked to the goddamn bone already," he snarled with vicious approval, allowing his fingertips to glide across your engorged clit before dipping just a fraction inside the clutching entrance to your molten channel. "This tight little cunt has been waiting for my fat cock from the start, hasn't it, baby? Just like the rest of you..."
The next ragged sound that punched from your chest could only be a whimpering sob of affirmation as he sank one digit to the knuckle, stretching the tight band of muscles clenching around him desperately. His answering snarl was a feral, animalistic sound - more beast than man as he began to fingerfuck you with a punishing rhythm that sent your bodycareening forward.
"I asked you a fucking question, kitten," he growled into the sweaty column of your neck, relishing the frantic thrash of your body as he crooked his finger inside you and scissored against the molten walls. "And you better have the right answer ready by the time I get my tongue in this pretty little pussy, or else..."
You keened at the filth pouring from his lips and the wicked curl of his finger against that spot deep inside you, writhing and undulating into his touch in a sublime dance. Soshiro allowed his free palm to snap up and cinch around the fragile bones of your throat, exerting the barest hint of pressure against the thrumming artery as his mouth hovered mere inches above yours.
"Or else what?" you dared to rasp, lips brushing his with a teasing nip. "Gonna spank me like a naughty schoolgirl, Vice Commander?"
Soshiro responded by adding a second finger to the first, wedging his way inside your tight heat with a guttural groan and a fresh rush of sticky arousal. Your choked off cry rang through the shuttle car and beyond as his thumb slammed down on your engorged clit and pinched in a rolling, ruthless grind.
"Not today, baby girl," he husked with savage relish, watching in rapt delight as the molten heat pooling between your legs began to coat his wrist with every pistoning pump. "Today, I'm just going to make you cum so many times you're damn near passing out from it. Because the second you're done squirting all over my fingers and face like a filthy little whore, I'm gonna fuck you stupid."
Your eyes blew wide at the crass threat, pupils dilating so fully that only a thin rim of iris remained. You whimpered brokenly against his lips, hips rolling with wanton abandon as his fingers plunged into your soaked pussy again and again.
"That's it, sweetheart..." he rumbled, free hand winding into your silken locks and yanking back until your gaze met his in the dim lighting. "Fucking cream all over my fingers so I can taste your sweet cunt just the way I've been dreaming about for weeks now."
As if triggered by his command, your entire body jolted and quivered in his arms, arching off the seat in a violent shudder as a deluge of fresh arousal coated his fingers and palm. Your inner walls clamped down on his digits like a vice, milking his knuckles as a flood of clear fluid gushed down his wrist and soaked the seat below.
The keening cry that ripped from your chest was utterly debauched, and Soshiro drank it in with unhinged fervor as he rode out your orgasm with relentless fingers. Without wasting a moment, he withdrew his hand and hauled you up until his massive bulk sprawled across the bench.
When you could finally see through the dizzying haze of aftershocks, Soshiro held up the two fingers still dripping with the evidence of your arousal, smearing them obscenely across his tongue. He let loose a primal, guttural growl at the flavor, and then his mouth was on yours again.
The kiss was all raw, feral hunger - teeth clashing and tongues dueling as his hands shoved beneath the hem of your shirt to palm your breasts. You arched into his touch as if electrified, and then his mouth was tearing away to suck the pebbled peak of your nipple directly through the damp cotton.
"You've got ten seconds to tell me why I shouldn't toss you onto the floor and fuck you stupid, baby," Soshiro snarled against the lush curve of your breast, nipping and suckling until you were keening and bucking up into his hungry maw.
"Because...oh god..." you panted, fingers digging into his shoulders with bruising force. "Because y-you promised to eat me out first…"
Soshiro reared up at that, the molten embers in his ruby eyes igniting into a full blaze. Without ceremony, his hands hooked beneath your ass and dragged you forward until your knees draped over his shoulders. "So I did, baby..." he growled, mouth poised directly over the sodden fabric of your panties.
With no further preamble, his teeth sank into the soaked lace and yanked with brutal strength. He tossed the torn fabric aside without a glance, too enraptured by the slick, puffy lips of your glistening sex mere inches from his face.
"Fuck me…" he groaned, fingers clamping down on the ample globes of your ass and yanking your dripping pussy up to meet his parted lips. His tongue swept through the silken folds in a single, broad swipe that made your hips jerk and grind against his face with wanton desperation. Soshiro chuckled against the molten heat, dark and feral, before sealing his lips around the engorged bud of your clit and sucking it into his mouth.
"Oh fuck...fuck fuck fuck..." you chanted like a mantra, spine arching and undulating like a livewire as the wet, filthy suction of his mouth pulled a fresh surge of arousal straight from the molten depths of your cunt. Soshiro growled with ravenous approval, lapping at the nectar that poured out in a sticky stream with every roll of your hips against his lips.
He could feel the tight coil of your impending climax, the desperate clench and flutter of your soaked channel around nothing. Unable to resist, Soshiro's tongue plunged inside your molten entrance with single-minded focus, fucking you open as his nose bumped your swollen clit in a punishing grind.
"So good...so fucking good...oh my god, keep going," you gasped out in a torrent of words and moans, the filthy squelch of his tongue pistoning inside your soaked channel the only thing louder than the roaring thunder in your ears.
When his mouth latched onto the swollen bud of your clit again and sucked until his cheeks hollowed, you came with an unearthly scream that would have been heard throughout the entire complex if not for the loud thrum of the shuttle car and the heavy thump of rain against the roof.
Soshiro allowed himself to be ridden through the storm as you bucked and writhed against his tongue, his throat and jaw working to drink up the endless stream of clear fluid that coated his face and chin in a sheen. It took several long moments for the wild jerks and twitches to abate, and by the time they did, Soshiro felt certain you'd been completely emptied out.
"That was two, princess..." he growled, dragging your limp form upright until his mouth could reach yours again. You whimpered softly as his tongue surged inside, tasting yourself on his lips and the slick, velvety glide of his tongue.
"Such a good girl..." he murmured, allowing the pad of his thumb to drag down your jaw and trace the plush contours of your mouth. "So sweet and delicious. You gonna let me fuck this tight little cunt now?"
You nodded frantically, reaching down with shaking hands to claw the waistband of his slacks. With a low rumble, he lifted his hips and allowed you to shuck the offending fabric down his muscular thighs. When you finally managed to wrestle the thick length of his cock free, he hissed in a breath through clenched teeth as the air rushed across the exposed glans.
"F-fuck..." you whispered, eyes blown wide and unseeing as your palm slid down the velvet steel and gave an experimental stroke. Soshiro's only response was a guttural snarl, one hand clamping down on the base of his shaft as if to stave off his own imminent release. Just the sight of your soft hand gliding over his engorged cock, smearing his leaking precum over the pulsing head, was nearly enough to make him blow his load.
"Don't you dare, baby," he ground out through gritted teeth. "I'm not fucking coming anywhere except inside this sweet little cunt. Now turn around and stick that ass in the air for me."
A fresh rush of arousal coated your molten folds at the crass demand, and you complied without hesitation. Soshiro watched in rapt hunger as you scrambled off his lap and turned, bracing your forearms against the bench and presenting the flushed swell of your ass directly before his gaze.
"Good girl," he growled, the timbre of his voice sending a shiver of anticipation straight up your spine. His palms dragged up the supple curves of your hips, thumbs digging into the dimples at the base of your spine. He allowed his aching shaft to slide up and down the slick valley between your legs, gathering up the moisture that leaked from your slit to glide over the pulsing head.
"You have any idea how many times I've jerked off to this ass?" Soshiro husked, eyes riveted on the hypnotic sway of the round globes as he rolled his hips and ground his cock against the puffy lips. "Every night for the past three weeks, princess. This perfect, juicy ass has been starring in my wet dreams since the moment I saw it in those naughty, little panties."
You whimpered and rocked back against him, the swollen folds parting to accommodate the pulsing length grinding against them. Soshiro hissed in a breath as the fat tip caught on the clenching entrance and sank inside with an agonizing thrust.
"God, baby girl...your little pussy's sucking me in like a fucking dream," he snarled, fingers biting into the flesh of your hips as he forced himself to still inside the clenching grip of your cunt. You were so impossibly tight, and with the barest trickle of slick easing his way, Soshiro could have sworn he was about to die and ascend to the heavens right there.
"Please, Soshiro...need you to fuck me," you gasped, head lolling forward until your forehead hit the backrest. The angle of his thrust had the fat head grinding directly into the sensitive spot just inside your fluttering entrance, and the pressure was already driving you mad.
Soshiro obliged without another word, one hand fisting in your hair and the other digging into the soft flesh of your hip. He withdrew with agonizing slowness, hissing as the clinging walls of your cunt fought to suck him back in. Once he was nearly free, only the bulbous crown lodged inside the molten clutch, Soshiro slammed forward with a punishing thrust that had you screaming and jerking beneath him.
"Fucking shit, baby," he gasped, fingers scrabbling for purchase on your hips as you arched back into his every thrust, desperate for more. The sight of his massive, veiny cock splitting open the puffy folds of your pussy was almost enough to send him careening over the edge.
Soshiro allowed himself to bottom out a few times, sinking in to the root and grinding his hips into the soft cushion of your ass. On the third pump, he withdrew completely and slammed inside, reveling in the breathless cry that fell from your lips as his balls slapped against your clit.
"That's it, baby girl," he panted, leaning back and spreading his thighs to allow you to grind back into his punishing rhythm. "Fuck yourself on this cock...goddamn, your cunt is so fucking tight and wet. I'm not gonna last, princess."
You could only respond with a choked whimper, fingers clawing into the upholstery as the thick, blunt head of his cock slammed against your cervix. You nearly passed out when you felt something prod at the puckered rim of your ass, and then Soshiro's thumb was sinking inside to the knuckle.
"That's my girl," he crooned, twisting the digit and hooking the pad against the fluttering wall of muscle. The rest of his fingers were splayed out across the supple curves of your ass, spreading you wide open and allowing him a view of his cock sinking into your clutching pussy. He could see the way your juices clung to his shaft as it pumped inside you, the frothy ring of white forming at the base of his cock with every thrust.
"Soshiro...Soshiro, I'm going to—"
"Cum on this cock, princess," he snarled, his thumb popping free of your ass and his other hand slapping down across the plush flesh. Your shriek rang out through the shuttle car, bouncing off the walls as your inner muscles clenched down on the pistoning shaft.
The molten heat that pooled in the cradle of your hips boiled over and erupted, a geyser of clear, creamy fluid gushing down the insides of your thighs and soaking the bench below. Your vision whited out as you were sent hurtling over the edge, body jerking and undulating with every punishing pump of Soshiro's hips.
"God damn, baby...gonna make me cum," Soshiro choked out, his fingers clawing into your hips and lifting you off the seat with a single-minded determination. Your entire body was limp and lax, held up only by the vice grip of his hands and the relentless slam of his cock.
Your inner muscles were clenching in a desperate bid to milk him dry, and Soshiro couldn't have stopped his release even if he tried. With a savage snarl, he yanked you back against his cock, grinding his hips against your ass until his balls were flush with the sticky lips of your pussy.
His cock twitched and throbbed, a veritable flood of his seed erupting inside your soaked cunt. You moaned as his spend gushed and splattered against the delicate walls, and Soshiro's hips jerked with every new pulse that left his cock.
The sweaty aftermath found you both tangled together in a delicious heap against the narrow bench, chests heaving with satiated pants. Soshiro's large palm traced idle patterns along the slick planes of your back, raising goosebumps wherever his calloused fingers grazed.
Finally breaking the blissful quiet, he rumbled out a low chuckle against the nape of your neck. "Well...can't say I ever expected an escort mission to go quite like this."
You hummed languidly, leaning back against his sculpted chest with a contented smile. "Oh? And here I thought you Defense Force types thrived on beating expectations."
His laugh was rich and deep, vibrating against where you lay draped over him shamelessly. "Only when the surprises are as delightfully mind-blowing as you, gorgeous."
Craning your neck, you met Soshiro's molten gaze - admiring his dark, tousled hair and the way his toned torso glistened with a sheen of exertion. You couldn't resist leaning up to trail a series of teasing, openmouthed kisses along the sharp cut of his jawline.
"Speaking of surprises..." you murmured between kitten licks and nips. "Care to elaborate on how exactly we ended up...undressed and tangled back here, Vice Captain?"
Soshiro groaned at the provocative path your lips blazed, large hand coming up to fist in your hair and angle you closer for a deep, indulgent kiss. When you parted, he was gazing at you with a heavy-lidded smolder akin to a predator satisfied after devouring its prey.
"Seems there was one kinky little minx I just couldn't keep my hands off any longer," he growled, giving your lower lip a teasing nip. "Not after spending all those weeks talking dirty back and forth."
You shivered at the reminder of how this heated tryst had kicked off between the two of you - graphic messages and enticing photos swapped in the dead of night before you even knew his face.
"Something tells me you aren't exactly complaining though," you purred back, rolling your hips in a slow grind that made you both gasp.
His pewter stare darkened with renewed hunger, free hand spanning the generous curve of your ass to grind you more insistently against his growing cock. "Not one damn bit, baby girl. But how about I take you out for a real date this time before we get too carried away again?"
You blinked at him in surprise before the words clicked into place, followed swiftly by a surge of warmth and feminine satisfaction spreading through your chest. Here was the notorious Vice Captain, all rakish charisma and endless skill in the bedroom from what you'd just experienced...and he wanted to actually court you outside the sheets, too.
Allowing your most tantalizing smile to curve your lips, you ducked in for one more smoldering, openmouthed kiss that left you both dazed and flushed. "I'd like that, Soshiro," you breathed against the damp heat of his swollen lips. "But for now...how about we take care of the issue that's just started poking into my stomach again?"
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RUN, RABBIT, RUN.
in which kraven loves to watch his neighbor from a far, until watching becomes useless, his hunger growing until he can't hold back anymore.
tags: smut, mean dom kraven, sub reader, dumbification of reader, kraven calling reader bunny, themes of stalking, some violence, unprotected sex (p in v), breeding and more filthy stuff.
he woke up every day, feeling her sweet smell even from across the apartments. it was the same mundane routine every morning: she wakes up, takes a shower, brushes her teeth, makes herself a coffee then gets dressed in the most perfect, stunning clothes and runs to her college classes. yes, the same everyday, but to kraven, it showed that she was disciplined - obedient.
he snarled, feeling himself get hard when he finally saw her through the window. she was putting on her shoes before heading out. kravens bedroom window was looking straight into y/n's living room, and for him, seeing her just when she passed by that window was becoming less fulfilling as each day rolled by.
he wanted her - no, needed her. he needed to bury himself deep inside of her, feel her soft skin, and hear her voice as she pleaded for his mercy. he knew y/n would be the perfect play bunny he wanted all along.
time started to pass by slower, and kraven was only anticipating more and more the moment y/n walks through that door. he wanted to talk to her, make her smile that pretty smile he loves, then make her kneel down at his feet and submit.
and he couldn't wait any longer.
he strolls to the other apartment complex just across his, taking the elevator to y/n's floor. O7:OO PM, she should be here any moment. and so right he was, because kraven could feel her sweet vanilla perfume from 10 miles away. It was driving him insane.
he wanted to eat her, indulge in her sweet flesh , kiss her, and show her that he was the only one she needed. it was clear she was made for him - for him to take and do as he pleases...kraven knew.
kraven was snapped out of his trance when a soft voice peaked his ears up. "Can I help you, sir?" y/n tilted her head to the side, settling the bags she was carrying down in front of her apartment door.
"Oh, hey. i live just across the street, and -- i know this might sound strange, but i think I've found something that's yours." liar. whilst he had something that was hers, he didn't find it, he stole it. a pair of pink cotton gloves that he stole two weeks ago when she went grocery shopping without them.
"Oh my god! I've been looking for them for so long!" she throws her arms up as she takes the gloves and stares at them intently. "they mean so much to me. I got them from my grandparents a few years ago..."
"Yeah, i, uh.. i saw them falling out of your pockets some time ago and picked them up, but I didn't know if i should return them to you directly or to the administrator. I'm kraven, by the way."
she giggled, her cheeks still rosy from the cold outside. "Thank you, kraven, really. I'm y/n, do you, maybe... want to come inside and have some tea?" Oh, y/n, you poor thing.
"I'd like that, sure." kraven shrugs, a smile crawling onto his lips as he followed slowly behind y/n into her apartment. "It's a pretty place you've got here."
"Oh, thank you! I'm an interior design major, you know?" she smiles, taking off her coat and offering kraven a seat.
"Aren't you scared I'm a serial killer or something?" he chuckles, his voice low. "Nope! it's kind of embarrassing, but sometimes i watch you through my living room window. I always thought you were cute... but was too shy to say anything. guess the universe already had plans, no?" she smiles, waving her hands in the air as she makes her way to the small kitchenette area to turn the kettle on.
kraven pushed his tongue into his cheek, trying to remain composed as the girl jumped towards the kitchen. a dress in the winter? fuck, but he loved it so much. it was white, knitted, and adorned with soft lace edges. She had on long white tights and fluffy leg warmers - she does look like a bunny. a bunny he'll eat up any moment now.
"What tea do you want?"
"Oh, any tea is fine."
"Is lavender ok?"
"Yeah, all though--" he licks his lips before inching closer to y/n that had her back turned to him. "I'd rather have you first, then the tea." he finally turns her around full force, trapping the girl between him and the counter.
"What are you--" she looks up at him, her heart almost ripping through her chest. "shh, bunny. do you know how much I've been yearning for this?"
"K-Kraven, I-" she shivers at the sight of the man towering above her. "You want it too. I can feel it." he inches closer and sniffs her neck longingly."Don't you, bunny?"
he grabs her by her hips and pushes his crotch closer to hers.
"I-"
"I don't like stuttering, sweetheart, you know? tell me, loud and clear." she practically purrs as his hand grabs the small of her neck and pulls her in.
"I d-do- please.."
"Please, what?" he sinks his fingers deeper into the soft flesh of her thighs before licking a long strip from her clavicle to her ear. "Want me to use you, huh?"
"p-please- fuck!" she winches as kraven pinches her nipples that indented up through the dress "tsk, i don't like when you say those words, bunny. do bunnies talk like that, huh?" he coos almost sarcastically, before tugging at her hair. "answer me, slut."
"n-no, they don't, I'm sorry, please just touch me, please.."
"I'll think about that." he tugs at her hair once more before pushing her down on the cold tile floor.
"crawl."
without hesitation she makes her way desperately on all fours at his feet, looking up at him through her already teary eyes. "Open your mouth."
y/n couldn't believe what was happening, the way she was willing to obey every command the tall male gave her, it made her feel so helpless and small - she couldn't lie though, she thoroughly enjoyed it.
obliging, she parts her lips and shots her head up to stare at kraven, excitement bubbling up in her stomach. he leaned lower just a little before swiftly placing his thumb inside y/n's warm cavity. "suck. bunny"
nodding, she takes the digit in her mouth, sucking and swirling her tounge around it. she didn't know exactly what to do and how, only she knew how much she wanted to make kraven proud.
"good pet. now..." he paused before reaching to unbuckle his pants "want you to suck this." kraven pulls down his pants, letting his cock spring free, hitting his stomach.
y/n's eyes widened at the sight. she'd never seen something so big -- it was scaring her, but the churn in her stomach pushed her to slowly wrap her rosy lips around the tip of kraven's large member.
"yeah- just like that, bunny. i wanna see you choke on my cock, c'mon." he says before thrusting deep in y/n's throat, causing her to let out a choked out moan. "be good and take it all."
grabbing her by the hair he begins to snap his hips, hitting the back of her esophagus, drool and precum running at the sides of her mouth and dripping from kraven's dick. "fuck, bunny- your pretty mouth takes my cock so so well..."
the praises he was throwing and the low growls gave her a little more confidence -- not only that, but the pool in her panties grew larger, staining through them. kraven could feel it, smell it, the desire and lust, his groans and her whines mixing in the air as he chased his high.
"I'm gonna cum straight down your throat, bunny, fuck- better swallow all of it." he furrows his brows as his moves become more erratic, finally shooting his seed into y/n's mouth. "swallow." he sternly says, staring down at the girl, who was all a mess.
"So pretty on your knees for me, such a good pet." he coos, abruptly picking her up and settling her on the counter. "I'm gonna fuck you so good, fill you up and make you have my babies."
y/n could only moan, pressing her thighs together in anticipation. "that whar you want? huh? want me to fuck you senseless and fill that belly up?"
"please.." his eyes darken, licking his lips he starts stroking himself before ripping y/n's clothes clean off, leaving the girl shivering on the cold surface of the counter.
"I'm gonna make you take this cock every day, it'll be the only thing you think about." he chuckles somberly before plunging straight into her wetness.
"fuck, bunny, you're so wet. you hear?" he laughs as he moves slowly, allowing y/n to hear the wet sounds as he worked himself in.
y/n throws her head back, her head spinning from the fullness in her lower region. "you like that? huh?"
he mocks before pushing in further. "fucking slut."
drool and tears dribbled from her face onto the counter, wet sounds of slapping echoing throughout her whole apartment.
she couldn't believe this was happening, the way his cock felt inside of her, the sounds she didn't even know she could make. all came to a halt when she felt a strike on her thigh, making her yelp. "Down."
she looks up almost disappointed from the sudden lack of friction. "i said down." he growls before he takes her off the counter, bending her over it instead. "look at that ass." he almost wailed as he delivered a hars slap, making y/n arch her back, redness spreading on her skin. the pleasure was pooling at the pit of her stomach -- she didn't know she liked it this rough, she didn't know her hot neighbor wanted to fuck her either, yet here they were.
without any warning, kraven pushes inside of her again, roughly pounding into her core, one arm snaking around her waist whilst the other grabbed her neck, pulling her flush against his chest. "you take me so well, bunny. you were made for me, yeah? all mine to use and-- fuck!" he growls, sinking his teeth into y/n's shoulder, making her cry out. "my pretty pet."
y/n could feel herself getting closer, kraven's dick was hitting her in just the right places - and the way she could see it forming a bump in her lower belly wasn't helping.
"you wanna cum, bunny?" kraven tightens his grip around her neck, plastering another harsh slap on her thigh. "y-yes, please!" y/n sobs, tears mixing on her face with salty sweat.
"go ahead, bunny. cum around my cock." that's it, as soon as those words hit her ears, she released, clenching tightly around his shaft. her legs felt like rubber, if it wasn't for his strong hold on her waist she would've most likely fallen.
"gonna fill you up so so good, bunny-- shit-" he moans as he becomes sloppy in his strokes, hitting deeper and deeper into y/n, after a few more minutes cumming far inside her.
their quickened breaths replaced the loud and sinful sounds that probably alerted all of the neighbors. y/n was sprawled out on the counter, and kraven was still deep inside of her. when he finally pulls out, it causes y/n to whine at the sudden emptiness, semen dripping down her bruised thighs and onto the tiled floor.
"I wish you could see yourself right now, bunny." he chuckles, running his palm through his locks, then down y/n's spine. "You'll be so good to me. I just know it."
⁽⁽ଘ( ˊᵕˋ )ଓ⁾⁾ 토끼's NOTE : sorry for any grammatical errors !!! this has 2k words. also, thank you so much for the amazing response to my first post !! I'll get to your requests next week. I've already started writing a little !!!
#atj oneshot#aaron teaylor johnson smut#aaron taylor johnson x reader#atj x reader#aaron taylor johnson#kraven the hunter#kraven x reader#kraven x you#kraven smut#aaron taylor johnson smut#kraven oneshot
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OP: I'm taking the civil service exam and if I get in there, will they fire me if I were mentally unstable?
Cnetizens: Sweetheart, guess why the civil service exam is oversubscribed as fuck?
yll: No, we have one in our unit. His performance bonus was deducted, and then he, armed with a fruit knife, stabbed two Deputy Directors of Bureau and then smashed the Director-general's office. He is now recuperating at home, and we have to visit him regularly. However, he is very principled and only attacks leaders when he has a seizure, not ordinary staff.
xhzz: Warrior.
dtxgg: I heard from my senior coworker in the organization that during one of the general meetings, when the Director-general was making an impassioned speech, this big sister suddenly slammed the table and shouted, “It's all bullshit!” Then she waved her sleeve and left, and from then on everyone realized that she was not normal. Big sister's exploits included rushing in during a bureau meeting and flickering on the forehead of every Director with her knuckle; when the leaders were eating at noon in the cafeteria's booths, she rushed in, made the rounds, and asked, “Yo, where's the corruption?” The leaders told her to go home and get well, she said she was not sick. After that, the big sister became the real Director-general of our unit, walking everywhere with two security guards behind. She came especially early every day, wearing sunglasses, patrolling the unit building, behind the two little brother trembling. No matter who it is, Big Sister will bash them right to their faces. The canteen auntie who scooped less food when dishing out, the masses who came to the unit to handle administrative affairs and stole the paper from the printer. She bashed them all, not to mention the leaders. The leaders have become numb. Later, the big sister's condition was slowly brought under control, and she had already retired when I joined the unit.
xxxC: LMFAO check the comments lmao
luvpp: There was a man in my mom's unit who became mentally unstable after joining the workforce and ran to the Director's office every day to sit there, saying that he himself was the director, and then the director granted him paid leave, and he still went to the unit to sit in the director's office as usual.
yzxka: ASDDFGHFGJ this one
momo: Our unit invited an expert to give a lecture, and when it was all over, he rushed up to the expert and asked loudly, “Do you know what it means to be full of crap?”
sbkpg: lkkfghdfgsdf
xuexue: The leader took me to another building in the office area, beforehand he specifically explained to me, “There is a man who guards the gate, if he asks you, do you believe in the universe, you must answer categorically, I do! Otherwise you won't get in.” Later I realized that the man was a little mentally unstable, and he was transferred to guard the gate, in fact, that building was originally inside the office area but the higher-ranks let them built a fence and set up a security booth in order to give him a post. Once the Director of Division went to a meeting and failed to answer his question and did not get in.
Vvvviola: After reading the comments, you will understand why everyone wants to take the civil service exam, because it is a job where even if you are really crazy, you will not be fired. It is completely different from capitalists squeezing laborers and laying off employees after squeezing them out.
momo: But as long as you don't go crazy, you'll be used like crazy.
arww: That was the case with the senior who was my tutor when I joined the office. She was crazily obsessed with her religion, and I don't know what kind of sect she was, but she played Buddhist scriptures in her office every day, wore a big red robe(*the unorthodox kind sect of buddhism), and meditated when she wasn't working, and practiced her skill in the room. I ordered a takeout at noon, it was Duck Blood and Vermicillon Soup. She righteously criticized me: duck blood can't be eaten, the animal's blood is full of anger, eating it will lead to evil spirits. I was so frightened that I dropped the vermicelli in my mouth. The leaders were quite polite to her. I worked with her for a month, she retired and went home, and I took over her job.
momo: Sister you go eat Duck Blood and Vermicillon Soup fearlessly hahahahhahhahah
lin: The Chief of my section, beat up two directors-general in a row, the third director-general was a woman, she told him, "I'm a woman, you can't beat me up".
xrhmm: they are even haggling
sytxztt: fuck
sstd: so did he beat that director?
lin: No, he doesn't beat women
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universities going to great lengths to let everyone know that they “don’t tolerate hate speech” at these encampments is just as sickening as them sending out all these “mental health resources” during this “difficult time.” going to student encampments and protests are the only actual time I feel safe on campus as a trans person. I have never seen a larger gathering of lgbtq people on campus than at these protests. all the transphobic harassment and outting and violence I have faced at university has been at the hands of white supremacist students and conservative professors and uncaring provosts and deans and lawyers. I have probably had meetings with every front-facing legal and administrative representative of my university because of the transphobic harassment I’ve faced and literally none of it has been at the hands of Palestinian or Muslim students. Nazis roam campuses free and proud and university administrators are openly approving of that fact and I know that because they’ve literally told me that to my face lol. “we don’t tolerate hate speech” fuck off and die. I know who my enemies are
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Underdog//Motionless one shot
The work below consists of fictionalized ideas and stories. It is an alternate universe story with only names and likenesses used in creation of a character. Please keep in mind that this is a work of fiction. Please review the content warning before proceeding.
CW: 18+ MNDI, Coach/athlete au, coach athlete sexual relationship [all parties regardless of being fiction are of legal age of consent. This does not mean that the behavior is ethical or acceptable in reality-does it happen, yes. Is that something I am going to go into? No. I am not an attorney. Per ChampionWomen Sexual contacts or “romantic” relationships between an athlete and a person who has a position of power over the athlete are prohibited. Person of power includes but is not limited to coaches, administrators, judges, referees, employers, staff, medical personnel, and even volunteers or older athletes and teammates.] the following one shot includes unprotected sex, P/V sex, fingering.
A.N: @mysticdoodlez and @ladyveronikawrites I present to you and owe you for this fucking piece of art.
Exhibition
Coach Cerulli stood off to the side in the coach's box, not saying a word, his legs shoulder-width apart as he swayed back and forth on his feet. He wears his disgustingly dark ensemble of worn high-top Converse and straight-leg jeans. Already obnoxiously tall, the dress style made him look even more intimidating. Glancing over him once, you notice an apparent sweat triangle starting at the collar of the black cotton tee he wore under his polyester team jersey. An electric green sea turtle was stitched on the right side of his chest, and Cerulli was stitched on the back. Trying to focus on your drill partner, Rachel, you steal quick glances after each ball toss. Under the black bill of his ball cap, Coach Cerulli's jaw clenched as he chewed the pale green gum between his teeth.
Rachel rolled the neon yellow ball across the rust-colored dirt toward you; spreading your legs apart, bending at the waist, glove in hand, you dip to the ground, catching the ball on its roll, securing it with your other hand, you take a step, and toss the ball to her again.
As a team, you'd been at this for an hour now; the humidity from the earlier rain made beads of sweat start at the back of your neck and under your cap. The gray storm clouds rolled over the Florida coast, looking angry; another storm was approaching.
Balmy tropical air and classic South Florida smell were something you'd missed when you were on break. Some of the girls decided to pack up and hit the slopes of Colorado for a week; you were more than eager to go. It had been a celebratory and bittersweet season last year, and you were all due for a nice getaway. Coach Adams announced last season that she'd be retiring sooner than expected. Her youngest had just graduated High School, and she struggled to adjust.
Enter Coach Cerulli.
He was overbearing and a perfectionist; he drilled and worked the team till he felt you were perfect. It worked, or maybe it was because you wanted to impress Coach Adams for her final season. Leaving the season last year, you were nearly undefeated. And it was no surprise now that he demanded the same perfection.
"You're looking soft, ladies. Let's pick it up. I wanna see some sweat, some determination, act like you fucking want it." He crossed his arms, kicking up some of the dirt from the field before he dropped down, squatting on one knee as he stretched the other to its entire length.
Several players on the team turned to look at the coach; it was no secret most of the team found him hot. He was older. Way older. But that added to the heat of the idea. You were aware of Coach Cerulli's attractiveness, his dark hair and eyes; the only part of his skin not covered in tattoos was his achingly beautiful face. Once you'd gotten close enough to see his three little scars on his bottom lip, it only added to the mystery of what had been his past. Fantasy is what it was; it was all fantasy. There was no room for error when your college life was riding on a full sports scholarship.
The team continued to drill, the breeze from the water bringing a salty taste to the air. Soon, the sun started to get lost behind the gray cover, thinking it might rain you guys out; the team slowed on drills, looking to coach and back at the sky. Coach stands up to his full height, his powerful form casting a shadow over the field. Deep and commanding, his voice brought the team's eyes and attention to him.
"I've high expectations for my team; this isn't just any season. I have my sights set on the championship title, and we won't settle for anything less." Clapping his hands, you can hear the friction of him rubbing the skin together, his tattooed fingers lacing and curling over each other in a frenzy. A low rumble of thunder sounded from the sky; Coach Cerulli pursed his lips and looked at the foreboding weather.
"One scrimmage, and we'll call it a night."
The team scrambled to their gear as he called out names and positions. You adjusted your cap, pulling loose strands of hair around your ears and reaching for your glove when the coach's voice called out your name.
"y/l/n. You're batting." There was no nonsense in his voice, and when you turned to protest, he smacked his gum between his teeth, heading to stand behind home plate.
You never bat, at least not first; the pressure is too much. You were a fielder on the team with the best reflexes and speed. Others were better at this than you. Grabbing the bat, you lower your cap and head to the base. Coach is droning on about how he demands perfection from all players.
"We won't be putting people in places of their strength. I want you uncomfortable; it's the only way you grow." He turns to look at you and nods his head. Stepping up to the plate, you take your spot, raising your bat, eyes locked on Sammi, who is pitching. She gives you a look of pity, and you know she'll take it easy on you, at least.
"Bat up." Coach growls.
"It is up," you snap back.
"If 'up' means hanging off your shoulder. It needs to be up higher. Fix your grip."
You tighten your hands on the bat's base, nails nearly touching your palms as your hands turn white.
"Too tight, you're not strangling it."
You huff out the air in your lungs, rolling your eyes. Just let me hit the ball, goddamnit.
Sammi pitches the ball. It's a simple pitch, and you swing, barely ticking the ball; it doesn't even get air, hardly leaving the home base as it rolls back to her. Just great, I look like a peewee player in front of the coach.
"Jenson, if you're gonna pitch. Pitch." he snaps.
You watch as her face turns apologetic; great, no easy out this time.
"Fix your stance." a smack of his gum between his teeth follows his command. You can hear the wet smacking sounds, throwing you off concentration. He continues to throw useless advice your way each time you miss the ball.
"You're off center."
Your patience is running thin, and you can see the players on the field becoming bored from the lack of action, just standing in the field and talking back and forth.
"Ladies, look alive!" Coach booms, and they jump into their stance.
Sammi nods at you, winding up to pitch; you lose all of the coach's advice, squaring up how you want. The swing is powerful, but the ball still whooshes by your bat and hits the fence behind the coach.
You let the air out of your lungs, turning around to see Coach Cerulli looking right at you, arms crossed over his torso. You can see his brown eyes sparkling under his ball cap.
"Nice hit," he says sarcastically.
Tossing the bat, you walk off the field, tears stinging the back of your eyes and starting to burn your throat. You've had enough for one night.
You can hear him bark orders to the team as the practice continues without you. Walking from the field, you walked around campus once, then twice; on your second lap, you realized you were halfway to your dorm and didn't have any of your gear. Your hands drag down your face in frustration, pushing your cap off your head. Your hair is sticky as you put the cap between your teeth and readjust the ponytail. Throwing the cap back on your head, you turn on your heel and head back to the field.
Making your way back, you pass several teammates; keeping your cap down, you avoid their eye contact, but the sudden silence as you pass and the sad voices that follow behind your back don't go unnoticed.
Rachel caught sight of you, jogging up to meet you halfway walking backward as you continued your walk of shame to the field.
"What's up? You walked off?" She has such sadness in her voice. She knows that you are sometimes too hard on yourself. You only have a little social life between studies and sports; your trip out of state lets you loosen up and gives you a good one-night stand. But it made you realize how much you hated having unsatisfactory sex with some drunk frat boy.
"Rough time, that's all," you confess.
"I know you hate batting. I'm sorry." you only shrug your shoulders in response.
Coach Cerulli is tossing bags of extra bats and gloves next to the storage shed; the way he lifts the gear bag, throwing it over his shoulder, you catch his shirt ride up just a bit to reveal his tattooed torso.
"Need me to wait?" Rachel asks, offering a soft touch on your shoulder.
"No. I got this." She jogs back to the campus as you enter the field. Turning at the dugout, not meeting the coach's eyes as he looks your way.
You are gathering your gear in your bag, trying not to make eye contact with the coach. The thunder is rumbling overhead again, closer than before; you can smell the rain coming. A heavy set of footsteps, and suddenly, he's clearing his throat behind you, your shoulders dropping in defeat.
"Sorry, coach." You keep your voice low and sincere. Feeling the pain in your throat again. Don't cry. Don't cry.
"What's up with you out there?" The way he sounds less demanding, and the friendly tone in his words makes a lump form in your throat.
"I just get choked up."
"Why, you're here on a scholarship. Adams said you were the most dedicated player."
"And I am." You don't bother turning around. Tossing your glove and a few extra things into your bag.
"Didn't look like it today."
"People aren't perfect; not everyone can play every position you know." You turn around to face him; he's leaning against the dugout rail, ankles crossed, hands resting on the dark blue rail.
"So, what is it that holds you back?"
"I just…. It's the crowd, the ump, and the pressure. The crowd is watching me, the team is watching me, and you're watching me." He adjusts his cap, turning his head to spit his gum out in the grass.
"Grab your bat."
"What?" He kicks off the rail, stopping till he is only a foot in front of you.
"You heard me. Grab your bat."
You scrambled for the bat as he walked back onto the field. You follow close behind, with no other teammates around the field that looks like it goes on for miles. Taking up your space next to home, you get ready to bat.
You are barely set before he criticizes you.
"Okay, first, your grip is too much." He stepped forward, putting his hands over yours, pulling your fingers loose from the neck, his large hands encasing your own as he helped re-grip the bat properly.
"Loosen up, spread your hands out a bit. There," the last word comes out as a soft whisper.
His brown eyes softened as he looked into your face, calloused hands brushing your skin; they were surprisingly well taken care of, the tattoos accenting every knuckle. The sweet smell of wintergreen off his breath, the fragrance winding up your insides.
"Your feet," he circled around till he was standing behind you, twisting your body around till you could see him again; he tsked, circling the air with his finger for you to return to where you were.
"You're always on your toes,” he complained.
His words were almost lost to the electricity in your brain; he squatted down behind you, one arm sliding between your legs to wrap around your thigh, a hand bracing on your knee, as his other massaged down my calf to have your heel flatten on the ground.
"Now, for your hips." Coach's words sound scratchy; you can hear him swallow hard behind you. His hands ghost over your hips, carefully not to actually touch you. "You must bend at the waist and practically fold yourself in half."
"Arch my back?" you offer. He clears his throat the way it sounded like he was uncomfortable.
"Yeah, sounds about right."
You adjust your hips arching your back, with your feet firmly planted against the ground, your cleats into the dirt, pushing your ass back. You feel yourself brush against his body, and he hisses.
"Easy there, tiger."
"S-s-sorry." you stammer as you try to step back. His hands grab your hips and place you back in your stance. His body is so close you can feel the heat building on your skin; suddenly, you aren't distracted by nerves but by something else.
"We aren't done; just watch it," he whispers. "You want to keep yourself firm in this spot until you're ready to swing."
A drop of warm water hits your arm, then another, and another. The rain starts to pour down in a gentle storm.
"Shit." Coach releases your hips as you both jog back to the dugout. Safe under the awning, you lose footing on the last step, stumbling into the coach. He catches you, arms around your waist, as he stumbles back.
"Sorry," your voice barely audible over the rain tapping on the metal awning; you place your hands on his chest, feeling the stiff muscles underneath. Trying to push off to create distance between the two of you. Coach Cerulli's hands don't move as he looks down at you, those dark eyes glistening under the shadow of his cap. This close to him, your senses are overwhelmed with the smell of him-palo santo and amber, a rich blend like a robust coffee in one of those expensive coffee shops.
His hands slid up your back, gently caressing over the upper part of your arms, stopping at your wrists and taking them in a grip before pulling your hands off his chest.
"Let's work on your hips some more. It looks like we've got the time." The way he says the words suggests he doesn’t mean anything about batting anymore.
He spun you around so seamlessly, releasing your wrists to take your hips in the vice grip of his tattooed fingers. Pulling your body toward him, you could feel yourself make contact with his chest; he was so tall, the feeling of what was unmistakably his own arousal resting at your lower back.
Flames licked into your lower belly as his hands tightened, then loosened on your hips. He started to move you, sliding your hips from left to right in slow motions. "Keep your feet planted on the floor." The harsh whisper in your ear made every part of your skin tremble with anticipation.
You tried to steady your breathing as he moved you in slow motion against his body. Was this all a dream? Were you asleep in physics and about to be highly embarrassed when you woke up?
Your hands rested on his, trying to prove to yourself that all that was happening was real. Leaning back into his chest, he groaned as he pulled you in closer.
"This is so wrong." your voice trembles as you speak.
"Very," he growled, kissing the soft flesh of your neck. "Tell me to stop, and I will."
Fuck, please don't.
It wasn't a good idea to continue, but the feeling, the expert way his hands held you without touching anything intimate, made you melt.
Leaning your head back into his chest, your face turned to him, desperate for his kiss. Sensing your desperation, Coach took the bill of his hat between two fingers, spinning the cap on his head so it faced backward. Closing in on your face, his full lips consuming your own, two fingers brushing your cheek, tapping twice, asking you to open.
The second your jaw relaxed into the kiss, his tongue was assaulting your own. He tasted so good, that gum he'd been chewing and something nutty at the end filling your taste buds.
You let your arm snake behind his head, cupping the back of his neck to bring him closer. One of his hands takes your breast and squeezes the flesh through your clothes, your nipples sensitive to the touch even through all the layers. His other hand slides over the front of your shorts, pushing between your thighs; your hips start to grind into his hand, desperate for friction, earning a sound of approval from the coach.
Pulling apart from each other, lips wet, red, and swollen, you were panting to catch all the air you'd lost in the kiss.
"Brace yourself, tiger," he warned.
Pushing hard against you, he shoved you forward till you folded over against the railing, his body pressed tightly against yours. Forcing your hands to grip the rail.
"Remember your grip." he teased, releasing his hold. His hands slid slowly down your sides, thumbs hooking into the band of your shorts to tug them and your panties down to your ankles. You gasped being exposed like this, the adrenaline of being caught coursing through your blood, the sound of your own heartbeat in your ears.
He kicked your feet apart, having your legs spread till you could feel the resistance of your shorts tight around your ankles. He took your hips in his hands, bringing your ass against him again, "Remember your stance." the words going straight to your center as he nipped at your ear.
His hands disappeared, and you let out a whine from losing his touch. He shuffled behind you, dipping his head in the crook of your neck to place soft kisses on your pulse point. His hand slid up the inside of your thigh, and feeling the muscles quiver under his fingers, you paused to consider what you were doing, your mind telling you that this was wrong. You'd get caught, and you'd be a disappointment to your parents. The thoughts of calling it off stopped when two fingers slid inside your warmth. His fingers scissored open and closed, swirling around before opening and closing again, stretching your walls with expert skills.
"So tight." He continued to whisper dark and dirty words as his fingers buried into you to the knuckle. The rough pressure pushes you forward and off your heels. Feeling your release boiling just under the surface, you start to grind down on his fingers as they thrust up into you, whimpering for more. You have started to lean over the rail, seeing the field's dirt and glancing down more to see both your feet and his. His pants at his ankles like yours, and the thought that his cock was out and ready for you, made you moan.
He wraps his hand around your hair, still pulled into a ponytail under your cap; rolling the strands around his hand, tugging you back so his chest is pressed tight to your back, fingers still buried deep inside you.
"Say the word, and I'll stop."
Past the point of no return, you moan, rolling your hips into his hands, still chasing your release. He presses his face into your cheek, nose running through the hairline above your ear as he inhales your scent; it's feral, it's animalistic, it's so fucking hot. His lips press into your ear, and you feel his hot breath against her skin. "You gonna come for me, tiger?"
You barely managed to nod your head before he curled his fingers, pressing on that soft spot inside you, making your walls clench around his fingers. He lets out a strangled sound of approval and surprise, taking the slick of your orgasm to rub on his erection. His left hand cupped your ass before delivering a harsh slap to the skin, making you rock up onto your toes.
He slides his length between your thighs, coating the head in everything left of your orgasm. Muscles in his chest are tight with anticipation and what you hope is desire. "Listen carefully, tiger," his voice breathless as he pants in your ear. "This is the only time I want you on your toes for me. Got it."
"Yes, coach." you gasp as his length slides into your warm center. He pumps slowly as you stretch around him, the hiss from your lips echoing across the field through the rain. "F-f-fuck." you moan.
Bottoming out with hard thrusts, Coach's hands rested on the railing on top of yours, his fingers lacing between yours as he held you and the rail in a vice grip. Your bodies molded into each other so well you felt the hem of his jersey wrap around your thighs; god, if only you could take it home with you as a trophy for this.
"I should stop," he was panting, his voice strained. "I'm gonna get fired."
"Please," you begged, turning your head to see his beautiful flushed face, mouth agape, tufts of his black hair sticking out from under his cap. "I won't say anything, just please don't stop."
"Fuck." he groaned, continuing to thrust into you, the force pushing you practically over the rail still on your toes, the muscles in your calves straining. Your thighs shook, the rain coming to an end as another tight coil wrapped itself in your belly, ready to snap.
"One more, give me one more, tiger," he growled, nipping at your earlobe. The scream as you clenched around him echoed off the field, causing him to clasp a hand over your mouth. "That's it. Scream for me."
Your noises were muffled by his hand on your mouth, and the hot breath as he panted on your cheek brought another orgasm on the wave of the first. One final snap of his hips and warm ropes filled your body, and all the tension of his muscles was released in one minute.
The magic of whatever you two did was gone when he pulled his softened cock from you, reaching down to pull up your shorts and letting you get them back on the rest of the way; you barely turned around, seeing him taking a little bounce to get back into his jeans.
"Head out, tiger. I'll see you at tomorrow's practice."
You nod briefly, grab your bag, sling it over your shoulder, and bat in the other hand. Just as you are about to leave the field, you turn around to see Coach sitting on the bench in the dugout, hands running through his sweaty black hair.
"Coach?" you let the rasp fall off your tongue, and he turns to look your way. "Extra practice tomorrow night?" giving a wink to let him know what you mean. He doesn't skip a beat, a smile tugging at his lips.
"It'll be a late practice. You game?"
"Anything for you, coach." you leave the comment in the air as you walk back to your dorm.
Crashing into your dorm with shaky legs, you throw down your gear.
"Whoa." Rachel commented, "You look brutal!"
"Thanks," you meekly respond, flopping onto the bed before curling up under the blanket.
"What did he do to you?"
"Who?" you mumbled, feeling your eyelids start to get heavy.
"Coach. You look like he had you do suicides for leaving the field?"
"Nothing gets past you, Rach." you smiled as your body drifted to sleep.
Several months later, and one game win thanks to you and a home run hit, Coach Cerulli announced his retirement. Disappointed but not surprised you accepted the new coach with open arms. She was sweet and spicy, a good coach, making your focus back on the game. The rumors were Coach moved states, you’d had his number but the digits disconnected a few weeks after his departure.
Just as well, you thought.
It was almost winter break, and a final due in Psychology had kept you up most nights, your body riddled with tension from the stress. 10 p.m., and you hadn't even bothered to try and sleep yet, your phone buzzed with a new text. Opening it up, it was a number you didn't recognize, but the message was clear.
How you been, tiger?
#miw band#miw#chris motionless#chris motionless imagines#chris motionless smut#chris cerulli#motionless au
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A vignette from Silly Rabbit universe (jeez it's been a while). Part 1 of 3 interconnected scenes. [Explicit]
--
“You know, there’s an old saying about lying,” Hob remarked casually to Dream.
Dream was leaning against the bookshelf as Hob graded, looking far too self-satisfied. Earlier, Hob had told him about how a university administrator had come by to ask him if Morpheus was a student, to which Hob had responded with an emphatic no because as much as he wanted to let Dream have his fun, he wasn’t about to let people go around thinking he was fucking his students, Jesus Christ. Dream had pouted at first, though he understood.
Now, he was smirking, and that could not be good.
“I tell no lies,” Dream reminded him, “and I weave no webs, other than by providing the scaffolding for imagination. Your students – and colleagues – are simply creative.”
“Well, whatever you’re doing, let’s steer the rumors away from sexual harassment, if you don’t mind.” Hob could technically always fake his death, but he’d really really rather not have that be the cause.
He also really didn’t want to have to go back to grad school yet. Please, God.
“As you wish,” said Dream. “I have no desire to disturb your life.”
“I like having you disturb my life,” Hob said. “Upend it. Throw the table over.” As long as you stay. “There just has to be a limit somewhere.”
“I will plant more stories separating myself from this university,” Dream said, and Hob breathed a sigh of relief.
“Thank you.”
“After all,” Dream continued, with a crafty smile, “there are plenty of other reasons a man such as yourself might be in possession of a lover who is… how did that student of yours phrase it? Young, pretty, and unemployed.”
Hob groaned. He could already see where this was going. “You’re only one of those things, Dream.”
“And as I have stated, I will not be obtaining a ‘job.’”
Hob threw a pen at him, which Dream caught with those supernatural reflexes of his.
“You should get a job. A human job,” Hob told him.
Dream’s lip curled in the most abject expression of disgust Hob had ever seen. “Why?”
“Because it would be funny. I want to walk into Starbucks in the morning and see you behind the counter glowering at some kid ordering a Pink Drink.”
“Ah, I exist for your amusement, then,” said Dream, leaning further back against the bookcase. “A court jester dancing about for tossed pennies.”
“Pretty much,” Hob agreed.
Hob expected him to pout, but instead, he smiled. It was not a smile that boded well for Hob. “Or perhaps… I am doing more than dancing for my coin.”
“What is this obsession with making me look like a sex fiend?” Hob demanded.
“If it is easily believable,” Dream said haughtily, “then that is hardly my fault.”
Hob blew out a long breath. “I’d almost think you wanted to destroy my reputation.”
“Perhaps I want you to myself,” mused Dream. “Perhaps I crave all your attention.”
“You have it.” Hob beckoned him over, and Dream uncurled himself from his slouch, stepping over and perching on the edge of Hob’s desk. “The moment you step into a room, you have it,” Hob said, looking up at him. “And all of my daydreams besides.”
Dream found his hand and brought it to his mouth, kissing each finger in turn. “Good.”
Hob meant to make some lighthearted retort about his sheer entitlement, but it was impossible to focus on it when Dream had his mouth on him, looking at him from under his eyelashes like that.
“You know,” Hob said instead, keeping his voice light purely through force of experience, “sometimes I think you haven’t actually given up on that bet that I’ll die, you’ve just decided that you want to be the cause of it.”
Dream grumbled in disagreement. “If you are choosing death, then I have been using my mouth very wrong.”
Hob should probably take his hand away from Dream’s mouth if he wanted to survive this conversation. He didn’t. “We should probably take this elsewhere.”
Dream, the absolute bastard, merely tugged Hob closer, pulling him off balance in his seat. “Must we? For I seem to recall a young vagabond who would have cheerfully bent me over a table in full view of the entire tavern, given the chance. Have you become so timid?”
“Nope,” Hob said, and, resigned to it now – or rather, gleefully allowing himself to be dragged into Dream’s fantasies, as usual – braced his hands on Dream’s hips. “Wouldn’t have. Even then, I wanted you all to myself.”
“You have it now,” Dream said. He hooked one long leg around Hob’s back to hold him close. “Will you let the locale stop you?”
“Oh, no, in fact, this is an enduring fantasy of mine,” Hob admitted. He slipped his hands under Dream’s shirt, feeling the sharp angles of his hips. “It’s just, we were talking not five minutes ago about avoiding getting fired for workplace misconduct.”
Dream merely looked at him expectantly.
Hob sighed and conceded, “Would probably be worth it.”
Dream’s eyes lit with victory as if he hadn’t known he would get exactly what he wanted from the start.
“This is a fantasy of yours?” Dream asked as Hob gave into temptation and pushed up his shirt, kissing his belly just above the waistband of his jeans.
“As if you don’t know,” Hob said.
“I know only what dreams you share with me,” Dream said, letting out a sigh as Hob kissed his way over to his hip bone. “I do not pry.”
“Uh-huh.”
“I don’t,” Dream insisted. He tugged on Hob’s hair in admonishment. “If your fantasies are obvious in the way you look at me, that is not my fault.”
“Are they that obvious?” Hob asked as he worked on unbuttoning Dream’s jeans. He couldn’t help but be charmed by the thought, even if it was another strike towards getting fired for inappropriate workplace behavior.
Dream smiled. “At times. But you have never been one to hide your feelings. And it is flattering.”
“‘Course it’s flattering. Sponge for compliments you are.” Hob wondered idly how obvious his thoughts on Dream had been over the many years of their meetings. Wondered if Dream had seen them, and simply decided not to address them — or hadn’t let himself see it at all.
“I suppose,” Dream agreed idly, as he dragged a hand through Hob’s hair, disheveling it, scratching his scalp with sharp fingernails. “Does that make you a font of compliments, then?”
“Or just a born simp, as the kids put it.”
“I did overhear a student say as much,” Dream admitted, and Hob laughed, pressing his forehead to Dream’s stomach.
“God I’m so obvious. Did you know I actually had a professional reputation, once upon a time? Properly professional Professor Gadling, I was once.”
“I do not doubt it,” said Dream, in an overly indulgent tone. “You have been wholly professional and respectable, always. And certainly never a charming bandit swindling your way into pockets and pants.”
“Charming, eh?” Hob grinned up at Dream, not missing the irony that he was currently mid way through getting into Dream’s pants. “Now you’re making me regret not making a proper pass at you back then.”
“I would have smote you where you sat for the audacity.”
“Nah. You liked me too much for that, I could tell.”
“Like an unusual bug I had found in the grass,” Dream conceded.
“On that flattering note.” Hob finally got Dream’s jeans properly undone, and pressed his nose to Dream’s pelvis, breathing in with a satisfied hum. Sometimes, Dream smelled of nothing at all in the waking world, like he had forgotten to apply that layer to his ‘human’ skin. Sometimes, he smelled like strange and impossible things, echoing dream scents that would never linger so long on a real, physical body.
Today, he smelled properly human, sweat and musk and Hob’s body wash.
“Are you doing that on purpose?” Hob asked, voice muffled by Dream’s body.
“Am I doing what?”
“You smell good.”
“Ah.” Dream pet Hob’s hair. “Perhaps.”
“Yeah, perhaps. I’m onto you.” He pulled Dream’s jeans down to his upper thigh; Dream obligingly wiggled on the desk to let them free, which was far cuter than it had any right to be. “You’re such a tease.”
“I enjoy when you want me,” said Dream, softer now. And Hob’s heart ached, but in a sweet way, a gentle way.
“You hardly have to work for it,” he said.
He took Dream in his mouth, then, and set to showing him just how much he was wanted.
Dream spread his legs wider on the desk, leaning back, letting out a long sigh of pleasure. Hob loved him like this—loose, indulgent, enjoying himself. Dream didn’t indulge himself enough.
And really, there was nothing Hob loved more than indulging him.
He worked Dream’s cock, licking over him and taking him deeper in increments. Dream’s moan above him was the greatest reward. Hob had had lots of time by now to learn, to get very good at drawing his pleasure out. A most valuable skill, to get Dream’s thighs shaking and his hands clutching tight to Hob’s hair, breathing in deep though he didn’t need to, relishing in the simple illicit pleasure of Hob sucking him off in the middle of the work day.
And Hob loved it, too. The taste of him, and the experience of his enjoyment.
Soon enough Dream’s hips were twitching up, and he came in Hob’s mouth with a long sigh. Hob swallowed him down, and remained there for a few lingering moments, Dream’s prick softening on his tongue, until Dream squirmed from overstimulation and Hob let him go.
He was terribly hard in his trousers, but wanting Dream was its own pleasure to relish in. “Dearest Hob,” murmured Dream, a glint of mischief lighting through the haze of his expression as he pet Hob’s hair. “Should I leave you like that? Wanting, and knowing that I await you at home as you finish your day?”
Hob shivered, but said, “More like go about your work and rematerialize at home once I get there. Don’t pretend like you’ll be tormenting yourself, too.”
“Mmm,” said Dream, “but I could.”
Hob sat up straighter. “Could you? Would you really make yourself wait?”
“Perhaps you will have to find out.”
“How am I supposed to know if you’ve really been good?”
“Hmm,” said Dream. It was a challenge now. “I will show you.”
He vanished, leaving a scattering of sand on Hob’s desk. A few moments later Hob received what he could only describe as a vision, a daydream of Dream lying in their bed, nothing but a pair of lace panties on, idly playing with himself through the fabric with one hand as he read a paperback book with the other. He knew it was really Dream, the image was too crisp to be a creation of Hob’s mind. Apparently, being also all daydreams Dream could make himself into one. Damn creature.
Hob groaned, pressing the heel of his hand hard against his erection before forcing himself to stop. He did have to teach, after all, though he knew Dream was going to be holding that image in his head all day.
Indeed, an impression of Dream’s voice floated to him.
Work hard today, beloved.
Oh, he’d be in for it later.
If Hob survived the workday.
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Take Care: Chapter One
Fic Masterpost | AO3 | Chapter List
Warnings: swearing, eventual smut, emotional themes.
Word Count: 13k+
Chapter One
“Thank you so much for accepting me,” you said, stepping into Shannon Hart’s office, Head of Applications at Richmond university. “I’ve been so looking forward to finally getting into publishing and writing.”
Shannon gestured for you to sit opposite her. You dropped yourself down into the swivel chair facing her desk, as she cleared her throat and adjusted her sleeves. You stared at her thoughtfully, taking in the slight twitch of her brow and the vein popping out on her forehead.
“Are you okay, Shannon?” You frowned.
She intertwined her fingers and placed them on the desktop before her. “We’ve asked you here today to let you know, with great regret, that your placement at Pluto Press has been… mixed up.”
“Mixed up?”
“Royally.” Shannon stared you down.
“Royally how?” You leaned forward, all decorum going out the window immediately.
“Our paperwork was sorted wrong. It’s an internal admin error, one that’s– frankly– deeply embarrassing–”
“Just tell me what the deal is, okay, Shannon?” you said, trying not to yell at her to just say it.
Shannon cleared her throat again. “You weren’t the name that we sent to the Pluto Press administration. Which means… well, it means–”
You smacked your hand upon her desk, making her flinch. “I mean this in the nicest way, but for the love of God, spit it out.”
“Your placement at Pluto Press was filled by someone else.”
You squinted at her. “Someone else?”
“Yes.”
“But, I can still get a spot, right?” you asked.
“Regrettably not.”
“Not?”
Shannon nodded. “Not.”
You toyed between the urge to scream at the ceiling, or round-house kick the woman sat in front of you. Both seemed appealing, both seemed necessary, but instead you did nothing. You sat like a rock before her, ignoring the upbeat dump-dump of your heart beneath your ribcage. You weren’t an angry person, no, but this was the closest you’d been to booking into a rage room.
“So… you’re saying, I won’t be an intern at Pluto Press starting next week?” you said, trying to comprehend it fully yourself.
“Correct.” Shannon stayed frozen.
“So…” You leant forward, fully, leaning down on your arms and looking Shannon directly in the face. She gulped anxiously, with nerves, and for good reason. “What the fuck am I supposed to do now, Shannon?”
“Ah, well.” Shannon squeaked out. Sweat dotted her brow and as quickly leaned back in her chair. “This is what I wanted to discuss. Your options.”
“My options,” you repeated.
“Of which there are a few. One, you could defer the year and be ensured a space on this masters next year, with your original placement at Pluto Press–”
“Fuck no,” you said immediately. “Listen, Shannon. I’ve put off this masters for four fucking years. I’m not waiting another year. I mean, I’ve already moved to Richmond. I’ve taken out my student loans. So, abso-fucking-lutely not.”
Shannon’s eyebrow twitched intensely. “I was hoping you wouldn’t say that,” she whispered. “So, your second option.”
“How many options are there?”
“...Two.”
“So, this is my final option?”
“If you don’t wish to drop out completely, yes.” Shannon was a stone-cold fox, you could tell. As much as her eyebrow twitched and her brow glistened, she was certainly blunt and to the point. It was something you could admire, despite the want to storm out of her office.
“So, my final option is?”
Shannon leaned forward again, strongly. “There is one other placement available for this course. They’re new, and we were originally going to try them out with a student who wished to be a sports journalist, but…”
“But?”
“He changed his mind about the course and went into the fried chicken industry, instead.” You squinted at her quizzically. Shannon’s face stayed as still as a gargoyle. “It’s a social placement. You do Instagram uploads, copywriting, player profiles and articles, things like that.”
“Player profiles? For what?”
“Football.”
“Football?”
“AFC Richmond, to be exact.”
The day had gone from bad to worse within a matter of seconds. Not only had you been wrongfully pushed out of your publishing placement, but now your only option was to work for a fucking football team. Football had been something that went over your head from the start. If it wasn’t the fact that boys from the school football team, when you were twelve, laughed at you incessantly, then it was the visuals of grown men clutching their knees and whining on a pitch that made you hate it completely. Football was not your thing. Football wouldn’t allow you to publish your first novel.
You widened your eyes. “A fucking football team?”
Shannon winced, and it was like a layer shed off her in an instant. “Can I be utterly transparent with you?”
“Please.”
“I know it’s shit,” she said bluntly. You let out a huff in agreement. “But, you still have the opportunity to network. Big name footballers have connections, as does Rebecca Welton, the club owner. You’ll still have all the access to publishing opportunities that you’d get through Pluto Press, just… in a slightly unorthodox way. Your coursework will be slightly changed, and the term structures will be different to match up with the league, but.” Shannon shrugged. “This is still something worth doing. You can write on the side, too. And who doesn’t want to be around some attractive footballers?”
“Me,” you said plainly.
“Scratch that last part, then,” Shannon replied. For the first time since entering her office, she attempted to smile at you. It was almost frightening to look at.
So, it was fuck all. You had no choice. You’d moved into your flat two days before, a tube ride away from Pluto Press, and coincidentally a walk away from the Dogtrack. There was no way you were backing out now, not when you’d been deferring your application for years. This was a time where you had inspiration, motivation, and wanted to succeed. You had to strike while the iron was hot, even if that meant dealing with footballers, of all fucking people.
As much as you’d batted away Shannon’s comment about them, you had already heard of a few players that Richmond. Jamie Tartt was well-known, and you’d be lying if you hadn’t thought he was fit when you’d seen him on his girlfriends’ socials a while back. They were a different breed, though, so entirely excluded from the world that you existed in; far away from the stoicism of footballers and their swinging dicks that fell into one too many vaginas. You didn’t want to be another working woman in the background, especially in an industry that you knew fuck all about. But– this was the best option. It still got you the same opportunities, still gave you the time to write and work on your own novel.
You inhaled sharply and sighed deeply. Shannon stayed put, eyeing you up as she pursed her lips.
“Fine,” you said. “I’ll do it.”
You had less than a week to prepare. Not in terms of your masters or education, but mentally. You were thrusting yourself into the proverbial belly of the beast, a football club full of men who, most likely, smelled really fucking bad. You made a list in your head– Febreeze was right at the top. It wasn’t just about the uncertainty and horror of it all, it was also something that transcended that. What if they didn’t like you? What if this entire experiment went drastically wrong? You knew fuck all about football, and would be surrounded by those whose literal entire lives revolved around the sport.
You felt like an imposter more than anything. More than the rage of the fuck up. More than the fear of things going wrong with your degree. You were an imposter, entering into a world that wasn’t your own, being handed opportunities that others would die for.
That’s all that went through your head as you stood outside AFC Richmond, just off Nelson Road. It looked like a typical football ground from the outside– a green and vibrant field directly to the right, where someone on an industrial mower was cutting the grass. The car park was full of expensive vehicles; Lambos, Jags, Martins. As you focused your breathing, a hulking pitch black Jeep came careening around the corner. You flinched as the driver parked it in one of the top spots, next to a bright green monstrosity, so low to the ground that your knees felt weak just looking at it.
The driver side door of the Jeep burst open, and a man, dressed exactly like his fucking car, jumped out. His jeans were black, his t-shirt black, his leather jacket– black. Atop his head sat a close cut mop of black hair, and his beard was trimmed to absolute perfection, almost to the point of robotism. It was, you guessed it, black.
You stared at him with a mixture of confusion and utter amazement. Was this the Grim Reaper, come to take you away for your sins and tell you your life was all but over? He looked back at you with an indifferent sort of stare, one that penetrated deep into your chest and made you want to violently throw up, or run away immediately.
As he approached the double doored entrance, his back to you, he stopped suddenly. He turned around slowly and laid his dark eyes upon you. “You a fan?” he asked.
“What?” you stuttered out, taken aback by the deepness of his voice. There was a scratch to it, one that resembled a growl. Was this man actually real? He came across as some kind of mythical creature that represented a bad omen, or someone gruff enough to mend the goalposts with his bare hands.
“Meet and greets only happen after games,” he continued. Your face soured with amusement.
“I’m not here for a bloody meet and greet,” you let out. “Do I look like a football fan?” you added quickly, suddenly afraid that you looked like the kind of person to wait outside football stadiums, just to see players.
He shrugged. “I don’t fucking know.”
You took a step forward. “I’m here to see Rebecca Welton, actually. I just…” You glanced around the car park, trying to find the right words to say that you’d been afraid to go inside. “I just didn’t know whether to wait outside or not.”
He followed your eye movements, looking around at the cars alongside you. “Well, she doesn’t seem to have an office in the car park, does she,” he stated. You let out a small huff, embarrassed.
“No, I guess not.” You looked into his eyes, tracing the outline of his stoic face. He was sort of… soft around the edges. If that was even possible. “Do you know where her office is?”
“Do I look like a fucking tour guide?” he said bluntly, and you flinched backwards. Your expression dropped, replaced with something other than the tinge of softness you had before. This guy was an arsehole. An utter arsehole, wearing leather and too tight jeans. When it rained, you bet droplets trickled off him in grey washes, picking up the black dye off his stupid fucking clothes.
“Well,” you said, regarding him. “No, not a tour guide. Maybe the caretaker?”
He raised his brows. “The fucking caretaker?”
“Yeah.” You squinted at him. “I can picture you mowing some grass, fixing some posts, DIY and all that.”
He shuffled on his spot. “Who the fuck are you?”
You crossed your arms. “Someone who’s trying to find Rebecca Welton’s office. And you are?”
“Not the fucking caretaker,” he said, before he turned on his heels and headed to the door.
“Hey, wait!” you yelled. “Hold on!” You rushed towards the door, flashing him a vaguely apologetic stare, but you didn’t dare say one outloud. He didn’t deserve one.
He peered down at you, letting out a literal growl. You backed up slightly, looking at him in absolute awe. “Did you just growl at me?”
“I growl at everyone,” he said.
“Has anyone ever told you that’s a bit weird?”
“All the time. I don’t fucking care,” he said bluntly.
You shrugged. “Fair enough.”
A moment of awkwardly comfortable silence followed. He continued to peer down at you, flicking his eyes across your own, perhaps in an attempt to intimidate you. It didn’t work, not after you’d got under his skin by mistaking him for the caretaker. You raised your brows at him silently, pleading with him to just fucking tell you where to go. You understood that they probably didn’t have many mid-twenties girls around the club, but the least he could do was help, just this once.
He rolled his eyes quickly. “All the way down the corridor, up the stairs. Her office is right there.”
He pulled open the door, reluctantly standing to the side for you to go first. You smiled. “Thank you!” you exclaimed. You rushed inside, fast-walking down the corridor until you found the set of steps up to Rebecca’s office.
He stayed back, peering at you as you went on your way. Before he turned to head down the stairs, he found himself subtly smiling at the scene that played out priorly. You had guts, that’s what he gauged. You had guts and you weren’t afraid to use them.
Rebecca Welton was the most intimidating, yet beautiful, woman you’d ever laid eyes upon. As you sat opposite her in her office, cup of tea in her grasp and hand moving through the air as she talked, you couldn’t take your eyes off the alarming look on her face. She was glowing, talking smartly and confidently, while you all but cowered before her like another male suitor.
“Did you catch any of that?” she asked abruptly, bringing you back into the room. You’d heard nothing, not when you’d been looking at the almost perfect way her face moved when she spoke.
You widened your eyes. “Yes. All of it. In perfect detail.”
“Great.” She stood up quickly, downing the remaining contents of her teacup. “I’ll introduce you to the team. Come on,” she said, rounding her desk.
You scrambled up from your seat and followed her immediately. Her shoes clicked upon the floor dramatically, as you made your way down the stairs and back through the corridor you came from. She took you down another set of stairs to the lower portion of the stadium. You passed multiple offices, and a gym, before she whisked you past a few back rooms.
“Locker room here.” She pointed to her left as you passed. You stuck your head around the corner quickly, taking in a wave of red and blue. “Manager’s office,” she added from a bit further up. “Beyond that is the kit room, and physio on the right.” Rebecca stopped in the corridor suddenly, making you gasp. She let out a breath, before turning on her heels and heading back down the way you both came.
You followed her without question, clutching onto your tote bag for dear life as she whisked you through the grounds. Her legs were too long to keep up with fully, so you were forced to partially jog behind her every few seconds.
“Um, Rebecca?” you asked.
“Hmm.”
“Do I get an office space?”
She stopped again, next to the gym. “Of course,” she said, peering down at you. “It’s there.” She pointed to the right, further away from the gym. A small room is all you saw, devoid of windows, with nothing more than a desk sat in the partial darkness. “I’m sure you can make it… homely.”
“Yes,” you said, smiling up at her from fear. Now wasn’t the time to be criticising your workplace amenities. Maybe when you’d paid your dues, or done a good job, could you ask for something more.
Besides, Rebecca seemed incredibly eager to be done with this tour. She hadn’t exactly been enthralled at your arrival, nor did she seem keen to talk to you for longer than she had to. You’d heard things about her before– a cheating husband, enough money to buy a skyscraper in Dubai, probably. You did your best to keep up with her, avoiding personal questions and trying to retain everything she told you.
The two of you turned the corner, headed for a long corridor, with daylight streaming in at the end. This was obviously the tunnel where players entered onto the pitch. You’d never stepped foot in a stadium of any kind, let alone been on the under-layers like the players themselves. As the both of you made your way to the doors, you imagined what it would be like for them– anticipation, nerves. You’d be shitting yourself, probably.
“I’ll take you to the team, now,” Rebecca explained. “Do you like football?”
“No,” you said immediately. From the look on her face, she wasn’t mad. Maybe this was as good a time as any to explain that you knew fuck all about all this, and actually didn’t want it.
Rebecca peered back at you. “Not at all?”
You sighed. “I know nothing about football, if I’m being honest. I’m a writer, not a sportswoman. I don’t care for sweaty men, or their reasons for fighting one another on a field. I’ll do my job, that I can assure you Ms. Welton, but I won’t deny that I couldn’t give a shit about this game.”
Rebecca slowed her speed, letting you catch up with her. Her quizzical expression quickly turned into a triumphant smile. “Fantastic,” she said. She was being genuine, and you had no idea why. “Well, come on!” she exclaimed, as the two of you burst through the double doors and onto the pitch.
The players bundled up and down the pitch with speed, kicking about a ball as they were split into two teams. You watched them for a few moments, following their movements as they scrambled up and down, kicking the ball between them, until someone finally went for a shot– he got it, but no one seemed happy about it. That was number nine, Jamie Tartt.
“I was wide open!” number twenty-four exclaimed.
“Well, so was I. So, I went for it. Sue me,” Tartt replied, in his staunch Mancunian accent. He stuck out his tongue like a schoolboy as he walked away, leaving number twenty-four with a sour expression on his face. He was comforted by a few others, telling him to brush it off.
You and Rebecca approached the coaches. “Coach Lasso,” Rebecca began, prompting the men to turn around. “This here is our new placement from Richmond university. The one I told you about last week.”
A man with the largest moustache you’d ever seen regarded you. “Oh, yes! I remember now. Welcome!” he said happily, shaking your hand abruptly. You shuffled your falling tote bag back onto your arm, smiling at him awkwardly as he kept shaking your hand.
“Great to be here,” you muttered.
“Call me Ted. You and I are both newbies, you know. Same as Coach here,” Ted said, gesturing to a man beside him. He wore mirrored glasses and crossed his arms intimidatingly. He said nothing, only sent you a nod in hello. “So, what brought you to us, huh? Got a love for football? Got a burning Tobey Maguire for the beautiful game?”
Tobey Maguire?
You looked to the other coach for help. “Burning desire,” he said bluntly.
“I’m trying out my own version of Cockney rhyming slang. Tobey Maguire, desire. Sylvester Stallone, the phone. So far it’s all actors, but we’re getting somewhere.” Ted peered down at you with a cartoonish smile. He was like no one you’d ever met before, someone so overly happy that you could hardly believe it.
“You’re doing… great,” you let out, from lack of what else to say. “But, well– I don’t know a lot about football, but–”
“You and me both, sister,” Ted interrupted.
You laughed awkwardly. “But, I’m happy to be here, and excited for the next year.” A lie, but one that needed to be said. You weren’t here to fuck up this club, or get overly buddy-buddy with its players. You were going to do your job, get your degree and use it afterwards. That was the goal, but during that, you had no Tobey Maguire to upset the team or the management.
Ted and his second in command, Coach Beard, turned around to the pitch. You stood next to Rebecca, who stood next to them, looking out at the players like they were being judged for the next season of So, you think you can dance?
Ted blew on his whistle shrilly. “Gather around, boys!” he yelled. The men obeyed, halting play as they all gathered before their new coaches, with some of them looking more than exhausted.
You couldn’t imagine the physical damage all of them went through, or how fit they had to actually be. You could hardly reach a level six in your bleep test at school, let alone be able to sprint up and down a pitch for two forty-five minute halves.
“Where’s Roy?” Ted asked, prompting one player to appear through the hubbub. When you met his eye, you almost choked on air. It was the guy, the not caretaker. The one that growled at you not an hour ago. “Ah, there he is. Listen up fellas! This little lady here is the placement from Richmond college–”
“Uni!” one of the players yelled.
Ted shot him a wide-eyed look. “God, you call college something different, too? Anyway, yes. Richmond uni. She’ll be doing a few things around here for us. Not PR, but keeping up with player profiles on the website, small updates, and all that jazz about the season coming up, maybe an article or two.”
As Ted spoke, you forced yourself to look anywhere but at number six– Roy Kent. He was staring you down like you’d done something ungodly, like you’d burned down his house or kicked his dog. His stance was one that you’d never seen either, like he was constantly on high alert and ready to strike a punch if needed.
“This here is Roy Kent, the captain of the team.” Ted gestured to Roy. He growled at you. You frowned at him. “You’ll be working with Roy for the next week on player profiles–”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa.” Roy stepped forward. I’ve told you all before, I don’t get involved in PR or website shit,” Roy spoke up. “Get one of the other lads to do it.”
“It’s just for the time being, Roy. Just until she gets acquainted with the grounds.” Ted tried. “As much as I’m happy not to have you in front of a camera– believe me, that’s up to you– as a captain, and as your coach, I’m asking you to do this for the newest member of the Richmond family. Okay?”
You didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. All you wanted was to start and not stop for a year, so time could go faster. All you wanted was twenty pairs of eyes to stop looking you up and down like something shiny and brand-new.
Roy’s fists balled tightly, until his knuckles went white. “Fine.”
You let out a long breath. “Great,” you muttered. Roy’s eyes found your face, and you looked at him with no effort to be nice. You and he both knew that this was going to be long and annoying. It was better to get it out in the first place than to keep it all in for a year.
After meeting the team, you headed to your shoebox of an office. You had the day to set it up and make your own, before things kicked off. Ted and Beard were still running coaching for the rest of the day, so you were effectively on the lower floor by yourself. You set up your office, popped down your laptop and made a new folder in your documents. You went through your upcoming assignments, and started planning for what you could do. Rebecca gave you the various passwords for the social accounts, which you started filing through to get a sense of what they posted.
It was all the type of shit that your mum would like on Facebook. Brilliant.
If this was what you had to do to get to where you wanted, then so be it. It would all be worth it when you had connections and a network around you. That was the goal.
You opened your ongoing novel on your computer and scanned the pages. This was the endgame; to get the baby published. It was fiction, not once mentioning any sport, but it was all you wanted. Years of delay had led you here, so you had to embrace it while you had the chance to. Downtime was something that you’d have an abundance of, which was another perk, you supposed.
By four in the afternoon, the players tickled back inside. They passed your office with subtle curiosity, peering around the corner as you sat at your desk, filing through emails and starting on a subtle plan for your first assignment, due in at the end of the week. As soon as you’d got the courage up to grab Roy for a quick chat, you could get started.
When the players began filing out of the locker room to head home, you packed up your own belongings. You passed a few of them in the corridor, smiling sweetly and saying subtle hellos as you made your way through, until you almost slammed into one of them.
“Oof!” you exclaimed before him; it was number twenty-four, the one you’d seen before on the pitch.
Gently, he held you steady by your shoulders to stop you falling. “My apologies,” he said kindly.
“Don’t worry. I’m still getting used to this place.”
“It can be a lot to begin with, but I’m sure you’ll get used to it very soon,” he reassured you. You smiled up at him, before he stuck out his hand. “I’m Sam Obisanya. It’s nice to meet you properly.”
You took his hand. “You too. I’m excited to get to know you all.”
“Well, if you want, come and join us later this week. It’s Isaac’s birthday, so we’re all going out to celebrate.”
“Oh,” you said bashfully. “I don’t know, I don’t want to intrude.”
“It’s fine, bruv,” another player turned the corner from the locker room. Isaac McAdoo. “Come along. The more the merrier, you get me.”
Player Colin Hughes appeared in the doorway after him. “Definitely. Come and join in on the fun.”
“Especially before the season starts next weekend,” Isaac added. “Gotta get our freak on while we still can.”
McAdoo and Hughes left together, and you got the sense that they were two players who had a long history of friendship. You turned back to Sam and shot him a smile. “Count me in, then,” you said.
“Brilliant. I’ll put it in our group chat,” Sam said sweetly, before he made his leave.
You turned to the locker room, pleasantly surprised at how that had all gone. If all of the guys were like that, then you’d have no issue with them whatsoever. But, then came Roy. You entered the locker room hesitantly, scooting out of the way as other players said their goodbyes for the day. To the right was the manager’s office, where Ted and Beard still sat at their desks. Directly opposite the door, however, was exactly who you wanted.
You approached Roy, as he pulled on a pair of shoes, and cleared your throat. He looked up at you slowly, resting a hand on his thigh as he lazily skittered his eyes across you.
“So, you’re definitely not the caretaker,” you said, in an attempt to diffuse the tension.
“The last lawn I mowed was my grandad’s when I was nine,” he replied bluntly.
“Noted. I can put that in your player profile, if you wanted.” Sarcasm fell from your mouth, but you got the sense that Roy didn’t appreciate it. He growled, going back to doing up his laces. “I just wanted to talk to you about that, actually. About what Ted said.”
“If you think I’m going to gab with you about the team for the next week then you’re a lot dumber than I gave you credit for in the car park,” he said plainly.
You waved at him in dismissal quickly. “No, no, that’s what I meant. I really don’t need you to do that,” you said transparently. Roy looked up at you with interest, waiting for you to continue. You let out a sigh. “I’m not going to pretend that all this is a dream come true for me, the same way that you won’t pretend it’s something you give a fuck about helping me with. I can go around the players on my own, don’t worry.”
Roy finished tying his laces, before he stood. He towered over you, but the intimidation he’d displayed priorly was starting to wear off. You got a sense that he was just like this, all of the time. You’d read a few articles about him earlier, about his start at Sunderland and his triumphant years at Chelsea, before he moved to AFC Richmond. Roy Kent seemed like a player entrenched with respect. He was one of the greats, that’s what every article had said. You wouldn’t admit it out loud, but you were intrigued to see it all for yourself.
“Fair enough,” he finally agreed.
You let out an innate sigh of relief. “Great. Thank you,” you said, before you turned and headed for the door. Before you left, however, you stopped abruptly. The locker room was empty now, bar the coaches in the other office. It was just the two of you, and you had a nagging feeling within your gut. “You can tell, can’t you?” you asked.
You turned back to Roy. “Tell what?” he replied.
“That I don’t want to be here.”
“You were stood outside the building this morning like you were walking to your fucking death,” he said. “Of course, I could fucking tell.”
“Just double checking,” you muttered, subtly embarrassed.
“Why are you here then? If you don’t want to be,” he asked, grabbing his bag from the bench. He stood to full height again and took a few steps toward you. It was only then that you realised he was assuming for you to both walk out the building together.
You stepped out of the locker room, falling into step next to Roy in the corridor. “The university fucked up. This was the only placement they had left,” you admitted.
“That’s fucking shit.” Roy’s candour was something you were growing to appreciate, almost. “So, you don’t like football?”
“I don’t know a single thing about it, besides it being people kicking a ball on a field.”
Roy let out a long, low whistle. “Fucking hell. No wonder you didn’t want to come inside.”
As the two of you emerged into the car park, you felt lighter than you had all day. Roy headed to his Jeep, and you stayed a few paces back. “It’s not… ideal.”
“That’s an overly nice way to put it,” he said, looking back at you. “And it’s a fucking lie. Why are you doing this to yourself?”
You shrugged. “I want to publish my book. This is a way to make it happen.”
“Fair enough,” Roy said, jumping into his Jeep. He rolled the window down and switched on the engine. “Just don’t fucking include me in it, alright?”
You scoffed. “You think I want to write about you? Don’t flatter yourself, Captain.”
Roy winced. “Yeah, yeah, yeah,” he muttered, before he put his car in gear and sped out of the car park. He left you without a second glance, turning onto the street and careening down the road as fast as he could, just to get away from you.
You found yourself walking home with a strange sense of peace. Yes, the situation wasn’t in your favour. Yes, you’d already fucked up and called the team captain the caretaker before you’d even stepped foot in the club, but things didn’t feel bad. The boys were nice, the coaches were welcoming, and even Rebecca Welton didn’t give a shit that you knew nothing. Things were slotting into place faster than you expected, but you were happy about it. As you made your way through Richmond, back to your flat, you realised that you didn’t feel awful. You felt almost happy, content, ready to take on the remainder of your first week and bosh out your first piece of coursework.
You spent the evening on Google, looking up the history of the Dogtrack, of AFC Richmond, of their star players. You learned that Jamie Tartt was on loan from Manchester City for a season, which made things all the more interesting when it came to his sportsmanship with the rest of the current team. You watched old game highlights, not understanding a single thing they were doing on screen. You gave up after a few hours of them kicking a ball around, too tired from the prior stress of last week to stay awake any longer.
The next morning, you got to work. You made an announcement to the locker room, while the guys pulled on their shin pads and football boots. “Over the next few days, I kindly ask that you all fill in a small worksheet for me. A bit about your backgrounds, your current positions, your birthdays, even. It’s for the updated player profiles on the website, and I’m on a deadline, so please do this as soon as you can!” you explained.
Sam was the first to hand his in, doing it almost immediately after you made your announcement. He dropped it into the small basket on your desk before he headed out to training, shooting you and a small smile as he left you at your desk. Soon after, McAdoo, Hughes, Bumbercatch and Zoreaux followed suit. You had enough information to start.
By the end of the day, you had almost half of the profiles written. You’d expected the workload to be more, or something intensely focused on football plays, but this was piss. You’d definitely be done by the Sunday deadline, just a few days away.
As the days flew by, you got better at approaching players on their own. You made yourself known and didn’t pester (unless they needed it), just reminded them of the task at hand. Isaac's birthday celebrations loomed ever closer, which meant the guys were in a boisterous and excitable mood for the final half of the week. They would play games in the locker room after training, laugh in the gym during work out hours, and pass by your office, waving at you with chuckles on their lips.
By Thursday, you’d cornered Jamie after training.
“Come on, man. It’s not hard to do. I just need it done by tomorrow, so I can write them all up for Sunday, is all,” you pleaded with him.
He took off his football shirt swiftly, making you roll your eyes. “I don’t have the time this evening. Got a prior arrangement, you get me.”
“I really don’t care about your prior arrangement, Jamie. I need this done. It’ll take you two fucking minutes, literally.”
“Sorry, love,” he said, and the patronising tone in his voice was one that you couldn’t stand. You were older than him by a few years, yet he was acting so inherently high and mighty. “I can’t change what evening I get waxed or the lady gets upset.”
“Waxed?” You grimaced.
Suddenly, a shrill high-pitched voice rounded the corner into the locker room. “Alright, boys!” it yelled, and when you turned around, you almost collapsed to the floor. Keeley fucking Jones stood in the middle of the locker room, beaming at all the boys with a genuine smile, and wearing an outfit that you’d never think would work on paper, but it absolutely worked in practice; on her.
You froze where you were, as she peered around the room and met Jamie’s face. “Ready to go, babe?” she asked, before she caught your eye. She smiled and shrugged her shoulders in greeting. “Who’s this?”
Jamie shrugged on a new shirt, packing some of his belongings. “New social person, or somethin’.”
“Social placement,” you corrected him, looking only at Keeley. “Sorry to stare, it’s just… you’re Keeley Jones, aren’t you?”
“The one and only!” she exclaimed. “You’re a newbie, are you? Welcome to Richmond.” She leant towards you warmly, placing a reassuring hand on your shoulder in greeting. “Now, I’ve gotta get this one here to his waxing appointment.”
“Oh, sure,” you muttered, peering back at Jamie and trying not to imagine exactly what needed waxing. It was almost traumatising. “Before you go, take this, though,” you added, before you handed her one of your worksheets to her. “I really need him to fill this out by tomorrow.”
“Don’t worry,” Keeley said, folding it neatly and putting it in her bag. “I’ll make sure he gets it done.” She winked at you, making you blush.
The final lads trickled out of the locker rooms, while you reminded each of them to get the worksheet done. A few picked up a new copy, others nodded at you in agreement, but Roy Kent– he didn’t so much as growl as he passed you for the door.
You followed him immediately, rushing down the hallway to meet him.
“Are you giving me the silent treatment or something?” you asked. He growled in response. You scoffed. “You definitely are.”
“Excuse me if I’m not used to nagging uni students getting on my back,” he replied.
“It’s been years since I stopped being a uni student, Roy. I’m in bed by ten thirty every night, I’ll have you know.”
“A boring, nagging uni student, then.”
“Ouch,” you muttered, feeling a slight sting, but you weren’t going to let him phase you. “Have you done the worksheet yet?” you asked. He let out another growl, to which you peered up at him with a blunt expression. “Please, just get it done by tomorrow.”
“Only if you piss off and leave me alone.”
You stopped in the hallway abruptly. “Done and done,” you said from behind him. He kept walking towards the car park, looking back when he realised you weren’t doing it just for show.
You walked back down the hallway, the way you came, as you went for a different exit. Roy stopped walking without your knowledge, furrowing his brows at you as you turned a corner and disappeared. He readjusted his grip on his gym bag, sighing out of his nose.
“Fucks sake,” he whispered harshly, before he entered the car park, door slamming behind him with an echo.
You woke in the morning feeling anxious. It wasn’t just because today would be the first time you socialised with the lads outside the club, but today was the last, easy day that you had to get the remaining worksheets. Your deadline was in two days, and you wouldn’t see the players after today for the entire weekend. It was crunch time, and as much as you wanted Roy and Jamie to be easy and mouldable, you expected the absolute opposite.
Your anxiety dimmed when you arrived in the morning to a full tray of completed worksheets in your office. All but one had been filled out and left for you– and by no surprise, Roy Kent was the last.
“Fucks sake,” you muttered under your breath. You hoisted yourself from your chair and made your way out the office, headed for the locker room. There was a certain confidence in your walk, reserved only for when you were at the end of your tether.
Roy was a grown man. Was he really incapable of filling out a simple worksheet? It drove you insane that he was one of those people who intentionally didn’t do something, even when he’d been explicitly asked to multiple times. Like a child who did the opposite of what their parents said, or when your mum tells you to do something that you were planning on doing yourself, but now don’t want to because she asked you herself.
As you approached the locker room, you let out a whining “Roy!” loud enough that everyone could hear you. You turned into the room, flickering your eyes across the players.
Roy wasn’t there. “Where the fuck is he?” you asked Isaac.
Isaac shrugged. “Think he’s already out on the pitch.”
You made your way out to the pitch, filling the hallways with the same whine that you’d released previously. If this was what it resorted to, then so be it. If you had to make Roy hate you even more just to do this damn worksheet, then you’d fucking do it.
Ted turned to you as you stormed onto the pitch. “Howdy!” he exclaimed. “Jeesh, did someone wake up on the wrong side of the bed this morning? I did that once, too, when I first moved here and slept on the opposite side of the bed. It was crazy, like the universe was all mixed up and upside down. I almost threw up.”
“Where the hell is Roy?” you asked, ignoring him as you looked out to the pitch. The boys were milled around, waiting for the others to come out so they could start warming up properly.
“Well, he’s right–” Ted began, pointing out to the field. He shimmied his finger around, like a cat obsessed with a laser pointer, before he dropped his hand in defeat. “He was right there before.”
“He’s avoiding me,” you let out with a scoff. “This is fucking unbelievable. He’s a literal child.”
“Hey now,” Ted said. “When I see him, I’ll send him to your office, okay?”
You nodded, pissed off beyond comprehension. “Okay.”
The day went by too quickly, but you managed to get all the other profiles written. Not once did Roy come to your office, and when the guys came back in at the end of training, he was nowhere to be seen. You approached Colin, who said that he’d been right behind him, last he’d seen. That was the same as Sam, as Isaac, as the rest.
Roy Kent’s back up career should have been a magician’s glamorous fucking assistant with how much he’d been able to disappear without a fucking trace.
“That’s it. I’m going to kill him,” you said, leaned against the locker room frame as the guys got themselves ready for the evening.
Sam turned to you reassuringly. “He might come tonight, who knows?”
“I can give you his number, if you want?” Isaac suggested. “Can track him down and make him pay, and that.”
You smiled. “Please do. I don’t care if I have to call him twelve times, I’ll fucking do it.”
“Why do you need it done so badly anyway?” Jamie chimed in, shaking out his football shirt.
You copied Roy’s number into your phone from Isaac’s, sighing as you looked back to the room. The boys stared at you expectantly. “You guys know how this placement is for my masters degree, right? Which means I have certain assignments and coursework to get done. This is my first one, and I need all the players to participate, or it’ll be a big, fat fail.”
“Oh shit,” Isaac said. “So, you get graded for this?” You nodded sullenly. Isaac puffed out his chest abruptly. “Listen here, boys! Any of you see Roy, you get him to fill out this fucking sheet, kapeesh?”
You smiled, feeling bashful. “Thanks, Isaac.”
“No problem, girl. Now, turn that frown upside down. We’re getting drunk tonight!”
The locker room erupted into cheers. Jamie sprayed far too much Lynx in the air, and Colin almost cracked his head open as he jumped up and down on a bench, but even you couldn’t deny the atmosphere was electric. They were all good in their own ways, just some were a lot harder to let their walls down.
As the guys filed out of the room, you peered over at Roy’s cubby. Gently, you walked over and placed an unfilled sheet on his shelf. You stuck a small post-it to the paper– do this for me and i’ll never come to you for anything else.
You left the locker room in silence, trying not to worry too much about having incomplete work for your deadline. You had Roy’s number now, anyway, so even if it was something small over text you were certain you could get something. A crumb, maybe. You didn’t panic, not yet. Panicking would be for the Saturday scaries, and the remainder of your Sunday. Panicking wasn’t for now, as you followed the boys out to the car park and piled into the front seat of Sam’s car. A convoy of you left for Isaac’s house, before you all hit up the club later in the evening.
By the time the sun had set, your legs were jelloid from dancing, and your abs were coming in from laughing. You’d gabbed with Keeley for hours at the house, and were still gabbing now on the way to the club.
“What is it with Roy? I just don’t get it,” you asked.
“What, you mean his rugged good looks, or the fact he’s emotionally constipated to the max?” Keeley replied, and you let out a scoff.
“Definitely emotional constipation. He’s not that hot,” you let out. Keeley’s mouth dropped open.
“Oh, please. I know you don’t like him, but you have to admit that he’s gorgeous.”
“I won’t admit that, because all he’s been to me is ugly.” You stuck out your chin stubbornly.
Keeley smiled deviously. “Call him.”
“Absolutely not,” you said, shaking your head. “Hard pass.”
“Just call him. As soon as you get him on the phone, he can’t avoid you. And if he does, he’s a real arsehole. This is for your degree, for fucks sake.”
“I don’t think he knows that,” you said timidly.
“Then tell him! Yell it at him! Get him to do it.” She urged you, and you had no choice.
As the guys strolled forward towards the club, you and Keeley found yourself leant against a wall in a quiet corner. You found Roy’s number in your phone and dialled before you could chicken out. You tried not to vomit when it rang, and with each dial sound you were close to calling it a day.
After five or so rings, he actually picked up. “Who the fuck is it?” he asked, his voice gravelly over the line.
“Roy!” you and Keeley let out in sync, both equally surprised that he’d actually answered.
“Yeah. Who the hell is this?”
“Roy.” You took over, letting out a shaking breath. “It’s–”
He sighed, cutting you off. “I know who it is, now. I swear to God, if you’re asking me about that fucking sheet again, I’ll blow my top.”
All of your fear dissipated. It turned into immediate rage. “Oh, you fucking arse, Roy Kent,” you let out harshly. “I asked you to do this one thing, something that’s important, and you chose to avoid me all day instead.”
“I wasn’t avoiding you!” he yelled back. “I was busy, and I didn’t need you breathing down my fucking neck even more!”
“Oh, fuck you!” you screamed. “Just fucking get it done– please!”
“Why do you even fucking need it?” he asked, booming his voice over the line. You sucked in a deep breath, trying to control yourself.
“I need it for my d–”
“Know what, I don’t actually care,” he cut you off. “I don’t fucking get involved in club PR shit.”
“This isn’t just for the club, Roy–” you pleaded angrily, but he wouldn’t listen.
“The other guys do, but I don’t. I don’t want the fucking marketing collaborations, the articles, the profiles, whatever the fuck else your job actually is. I’m too old to fucking deal with this shit.”
“Are you fucking serious?” you exploded. “Do you hear yourself right now? You’re a professional footballer, Roy. This is part of the fucking job!”
“Good-fucking-bye,” he said.
“Hey, wa–!” you yelled, but the line went dead before you could get another word in. You called back, but the line went to voicemail immediately. You assumed he’d blocked your number. “I’m going to– I’m going to fucking–”
“Use your words, babe,” Keeley said, trying to calm you down. Soon, though, your anger turned to tears. Your eyes started watering, and you sniffed back snot. Keeley quickly wrapped her arms around you. “Hey now, hey, come on,” she crooned sweetly. “It’ll be okay.”
“My first assignment and I’ve already fucked up. It’ll be docked at 40% for being incomplete,” you explained. Keeley pulled back, looking at you softly.
“I’m sorry, babe. Can you tell them he was being an arse?”
“I don’t know. They might not believe me.”
“It’s Roy Kent. Everyone knows he’s a prick.” Keeley gently brushed a few strands of hair behind your ears. “Come on. Let’s have some fun and try to forget about this tonight, okay?”
“Okay.” You sniffed, breathing out to try and expel the anxiety from your stomach. “I need a drink,” you said.
Keeley twisted her arm in yours. The two of you walked down the street together, with Keeley cracking jokes to cheer you up. “I think you need more than one drink, to be honest,” she whittled on, and you allowed yourself to relax. Just for the evening, just for then.
When you got home, you sent Roy a drunk text. It was short and to the point, and when you woke up, you didn’t have a reply. You weren’t expecting one, not after that phone call. You read over the text, over and over, imagining what Roy must feel like.
This was for my degree, my first assignment is due on Sunday. It’ll be incomplete without you.
You didn’t even know if he’d read it, but you were past the point of trying. You’d done all you could, and still he’d denied you. This was on him, not you.
Roy spent his Friday evening in anguish. Sat at his dining table with a beer, he got out a crumpled version of your worksheet from his gym bag. He looked over the questions he’d already answered– his birthday, his prior positions through the years, but the one question that made him want to rage was still unanswered: What do you want from your career in the future?
The future for Roy was different to that of McAdoo, and Tartt, and Obisanya. Roy Kent’s future was up and coming, and he knew it wouldn’t involve running around a pitch anymore. Seeing that question hadn’t just made him upset, it had ruined his entire week. So, he’d avoided you like the plague, he’d spent every night doing the same thing; trying to fucking answer it and getting nowhere.
So, he’d decided to say fuck it, and not do it at all. After he’d hung up on you that night, his anger at you quickly turned to guilt. On Monday, he’d apologise and hand it in, just without that question answered. But for now, he wanted to sit in silence, read the latest Dan Brown novel he had, and drink beer until he fell asleep on the sofa.
Roy turned off his phone for the rest of the weekend.
You slept with yours the entire weekend, but still got no reply from Roy. You wanted to scream at him, tell him that he was an entitled arse, but you knew it’d be useless. Roy Kent obviously didn’t give a shit about you, so why would he care about your insults? You spent your Sunday compiling the profiles that you had already, putting them together to make something coherent. On the front page, you had to specify that one player had not completed the task, which would be your downfall. When you submitted your assignment, you slammed your laptop shut and immediately went to bed. You didn’t want to stay up thinking about it, or think about the email that you’d have in your inbox tomorrow, saying how it would be docked at 40% for being incomplete.
You slept like shit, but still you rose on Monday morning. The walk to Nelson Road was particularly bleak, with black clouds bustling over Richmond and rain on the forecast for the next few days. The atmosphere at the stadium was tense, too, what with the first game of the season being that weekend. The boys were all conserving their energy, all working hard. When you arrived at your office, you flicked on the light– a crumpled worksheet lay on your desk.
The name at the top– Roy Kent.
He’d done the majority, but crossed out the final question. You wondered if he’d done that as an apology, or as an attempt to piss you off further. You’d texted him about your deadline, told him that it was on Sunday. Had he not even opened your message? You picked up his sheet and read it through, trying to keep at bay the anger that you felt in your chest. Maybe he hadn’t meant it to be, but this was cruel. He’d given you enough to make a decent profile, but a day late. It came across like he was laughing in your face.
Quickly, before you lost your nerve, you picked up the worksheet and booked it to the locker room. You stormed down the corridor, turning into the room strongly. You didn’t look at anyone else, just eyes forward, and latched upon the number six at the top of Roy’s blue cubby opposite the door. The boys stopped talking, going utterly silent at your arrival.
Roy turned to you, shooting you a quizzical look. He peered down at the worksheet in your hands, then back up at your blunt and glassy-eyed expression.
“What?” he asked plainly.
You responded by thrusting the worksheet into his chest. He grabbed hold of it, not expecting an altercation this early in the morning. You stepped back, exhaling from your nose, looking at him with such disappointment, before you left them to it.
Roy looked at the worksheet in his hands, utterly confused as to why you gave it back after trying so hard to get it in the first place. He glanced around the room, taking in the pursed lip expressions of his teammates.
“What the fuck just happened?” he asked them, booming.
“Her deadline was yesterday, bruv,” Isaac said. Tension descended over the room.
“Deadline for what?” Roy asked.
“Her degree, Roy. This was her first assignment,” Sam added.
“How the fuck was I supposed to know that?” Roy said, furrowing his brows.
“She tried to tell you, man,” Colin joined in. “On the phone with Keeley.”
“And in a text.” Jamie pointed to Colin, before looking at Roy. “Keeley told me that she sent you a message that evening, explaining why she needed it.”
“Got docked at 40%, innit,” Isaac added, pulling up his socks.
Roy’s eyes found a spot on the wall and zoned out in realisation. He’d turned his phone off all weekend. “Fuuuuuuuck,” he breathed out.
As much as Roy wanted to be left alone, he wasn’t cruel. If he’d known it was for your degree, he would have grown the fuck up and handed it in sooner. Now, as you sat at your desk and read over the reply from your professor, probably over and over again, he felt awful. It’d only been a week, and he knew you didn’t even want to be doing this specific placement. He felt like an arsehole, a real, fucking arsehole.
At training, he could hardly focus. The thought of you, sat at your desk, pissed off, upset, writing another Instagram caption or article that you couldn’t give a shit about, made him angry at himself. Roy had never gone to uni, or done a masters. From the age of nine, he’d been destined to be a professional footballer. He’d got lucky, alongside working hard for the entirety of his career. He knew you also worked hard, just from the fact you put yourself in a shit position to get what you wanted. That took guts, even Roy could admit that.
When he missed another assist during training, his third miss for the day, he stomped his feet on the pitch and let out a loud, “Fuck this!”
Roy pulled off his bib, throwing it at Nate, the kit man, before he stormed off the pitch. His boots clattered against the concrete floor as he skidded his way through the stadium, all the way to your office. He didn’t knock, but instead bombarded his way inside.
You let out a small gasp at his arrival, but stayed sat down, glued to your spot.
“Why didn’t you fucking tell me it was for your degree?” he boomed. “I would have fucking handed it over sooner if you had.”
“Why would that make any difference?” you said, keeping your voice steady.
“Because it’s not just for the club, it’s for something you’re working towards.”
“So, you’re saying, if it was only for the club and not myself too, you wouldn’t have done it at all?”
“Fuck no. I don’t do PR shit,” he said bluntly.
“Even if it was my job to do it? Even though it was something you had a responsibility to contribute towards?” you said, raising your brows at him. “That’s no fucking better, Roy.”
“I just–” he stuttered. “I didn’t mean to fuck this up for you, that’s what I mean.”
“It is what it is.” You shuffled some papers on your desk, rearranging your notebooks just to keep yourself busy.
“Isaac told me you’d get a bad mark,” Roy said.
“Isaac is right,” you confirmed.
“Well, now I feel like an arsehole.” Roy breathed in deeply, and exhaled sharply.
“You were an arsehole, Roy,” you said immediately, strongly. “But, it’s done now. This was the only assignment I had that included the whole team, anyway. So, from now on, I’ll be sure to stay far far away from you.”
Roy short-circuited for a moment. He opened and shut his mouth a few times, he balled his fists, he shuffled on the spot. He looked like a robot that had lemonade poured on his circuit. His jaw clenched, and you watched in awe at the sheer skill he used to tense his body in such a way.
“Roy?” you asked, concerned.
“Fucks sake!” he exploded, before he left your office immediately. You got up from your desk and zoomed to the door, watching him walk away from the field and to the locker room instead, muttering to himself all the same.
You didn’t see him for the remainder of the day. You bumped into Ted on your way out the stadium, to which he shot you a perked brow look. You let out a long sigh, followed by a slightly awkward chuckle.
“Well, what a day,” you said.
“You could say that again,” he agreed. “The first match is on the horizon, and our captain walked out mid practice session.”
You winced. “Sorry about that,” you apologised.
“Oh, please, it’s not your fault,” Ted reassured you. “Gotta say, it’s not the first time a player has abandoned us halfway through the day, but at least it was today instead of on Saturday.”
“Wait” You stopped in the corridor, right before the doors to the car park. “He didn’t come back afterwards?”
Ted squinted at you. “You didn’t know? He flew off into the wind like one of the Wicked Witch of the East’s monkey henchmen. One second he was yelling obscenities on the pitch, and the next he’d driven off in his Jeep.”
You let out a stuttered breath, trying to compute Ted’s words. Roy had vanished after storming into your office, and no one knew where the fuck he’d disappeared to. It didn’t make sense, and you didn’t think this ordeal would mean that much to him in the aftermath. You weren’t trying to beat him up after what he’d done, as much as it had hurt you and pissed you off about your mark. This was odd, though, and incredibly out of character for Richmond’s captain.
“Weird,” you let out.
“Really weird,” Ted repeated. “But, who are we to question a football star?”
You squinted at him. “Isn’t that your job?”
Ted shrugged. “Hell if I know.”
You walked home, stunned into silence, trying to figure out what was actually going through Roy’s skull. You were half-tempted to text him, but you still didn’t know if he’d blocked you or not. You almost wanted to reassure him that it was fine, even though he was the one that fucked up your assignment. It was odd how that worked, wasn’t it? How those who had been done wrong felt the need to check in after the wrongdoer realised their actions. You had no reason to tell Roy it was fine, but you still wanted to. If his outburst had told you anything, it was that he felt bad about it all. That was good, you supposed. That meant he wasn’t as emotionally constipated as you’d thought.
Roy ignored you for the next three days. It was blindingly obvious to everyone at the club, even including Rebecca, who you met with for lunch on Thursday in her office.
“I think he feels bad,” you explained.
“I suspect he does. That’s no reason to be behaving like a child.” She ate a mouthful of salad.
“I suppose not… but other than that, it’s all going very well!”
Her face soured. “Oh?”
“I’ve given the Instagram captions a revamp, and I’m in the process of updating the website, too. I had this idea to do articles about the employees and why they wanted to get involved with AFC Richmond, and their passions outside of work, too–”
“That all sounds very interesting,” Rebecca cut you off. “But, unfortunately, I have a meeting to attend.”
“Oh,” you said, as she stood up. You followed suit, picking up your salad and juggling the rest of your lunch in your arms. “Well, this was really nice!” you said, as she started herding you out of her office. “Maybe we should do this again–?”
“Maybe,” Rebecca said. “Bye bye, now!”
You stood outside her closed door. It almost touched your nose from where she’d slammed it, your arms full of your belongings. You let out a sigh, and headed back down the stairs to your office sullenly. You found that what you missed the most out of everything– not the sunlight, or the decor– was having a woman work friend. You felt almost isolated being one of the only women who worked in the building. It was lonely sometimes.
You shuffled your belongings back into your bag on the walk down. You passed the gym as you approached your office and took a peek through the window. On the treadmill, facing the corridor by your office, was Roy. He read a book as he did an incline walk, reading the words thoughtfully, before he turned the page.
Suddenly, he looked up and caught your eye. You flinched, but stayed frozen in your spot. Roy’s face flattened into an unreadable expression. You gulped away the shock, and instead raised your hand and waved at him awkwardly.
Without warning, Roy fell off the treadmill. You gasped immediately, letting out a “Roy?!” as you dropped your bag to the floor and made your way to the gym.
You careened through the door and peered at the floor. Roy was there, crumpled, book thrown under a weight bench on the other side of the gym. “Are you alright?” you asked quickly, offering him your hand.
The other boys stopped what they were doing to witness the scene. Not one of them helped Roy up themselves, but instead waited for you to rush to his aid. It was beyond odd. Roy couldn’t even meet your eye, let alone take your hand.
You frowned at him, hurt. “Roy,” you tried again. “You know you can look at me, right?”
“I’m fine,” he croaked, and forced himself to look up and meet your gaze. “Just tripped.” Knees clicking, he got himself up off the floor. That’s when he caught your eye properly, frowning sullenly. You’d never seen him don such an expression, let alone this close.
You stepped back a little, confused as hell. You looked around the room at the others, their silence descending upon the entire stadium floor, not just the gym. They were all acting strange, making you feel like you were on the outside of an inside joke that they all knew well.
You scoffed, annoyed, as you reversed towards the door. “Okay,” you let out. “You’re all acting so fucking strange this week.” You reached the door frame, and went to leave, but stopped. You looked back at them all, before your gaze landed on Roy strongly. “I don’t like it.”
You left, walked back to your office, and shut the door with a bang.
Roy turned to the guys in the gym, still catching his breath from before. The guys looked at him like he was wounded, almost, and not just from the abrupt fall. Roy breathed out deeply, taking in their pitying faces.
“Stop fucking looking at me, alright!” he burst.
“Sorry, Roy,” Isaac said first, followed by some mutters from the others.
“I’m not some fucking baby bird that’s fallen out a fucking tree, alright?”
“Then why are you acting like one?” Jamie said suddenly. He sauntered forwards, and the rest of the team held their breath. “What, am I wrong? You haven’t said two words to her in days, not since you went AWOL on us earlier this week.” There were nods of agreement, some shrugs of confusion. “Where did you even go, like? You just took off.”
The yeah’s of agreement are what made Roy lose it. Everyone wanted to know where he’d gone, why he’d left, but he hadn’t been able to get it out since he’d done it on Monday.
“I went to her fucking uni!” he bellowed over their mutterings. “I went to her uni and spoke with her fucking lecturer, and said how much of a fucking arse I was.” The room went utterly silent. Roy looked to the floor. “That’s why I haven’t said a fucking word, because I don’t know if I made it better, or if I fucked it up even more.”
Roy balled his fists. He’d been feeling ashamed since Monday, more than he’d expected to feel. Guilt was his least favourite thing to feel, even though he often faked being unbothered.
Colin took an abrupt step forward, snapping the tension. “That’s fucking badass.”
Roy sent a confused arch of his brow at the Welshman. “Really?”
“Hell yeah, that’s badass. That’s a proper grand gesture, boyo. One that shows how bad you truly feel about it all,” Colin reassured him. The lads nodded in approval, sealing the deal that Roy had done the right thing. “She doesn’t know?”
Roy shook his head. “She hasn’t said anything. I don’t know if anything’s come of it.”
“Tell her tomorrow,” Sam spoke up. “Tell her tomorrow and I assure you, she will be okay about it all. I do not get the sense that she holds a grudge, you know? She is a kind person.” More hums of agreement filtered around the room. “Also, you cannot do it today. Not after that display on the treadmill,” Sam added, wincing.
“True,” Roy agreed reluctantly.
Isaac approached his captain then, placing a huge but reassuring hand on his shoulder. “She’ll forgive you, bruv. I’m sure of it.”
Roy nodded. “Thanks, Isaac.”
You locked yourself in your office for the remainder of the day. It was too odd out there, both on Roy’s and the guys’ part. You had no idea what had them acting so off-puttingly, but you wanted no fucking part of it. You dived into work, completing a plan for a new article on the website, before writing your novel for the rest of the day. Shannon Hart had been right– you had so much spare time to write that you already felt like an author already. You were on the clock while tapping away, getting paid for writing your book already, it seemed.
Near the end of the day, an email was pinged into your inbox from your lecturer. You had the jitters every time you received an email from him now, after reading what he had to say about your incomplete first assignment. You’d come to accept the 40% outcome over the past few days, but it still stung. You didn’t want to be considered a failure in your course, especially when you’d only just started.
You opened it up nervously, skimming the contents quickly until you realised it was nothing bad– in fact, it was something very good. “Shut the fuck up…” you let out, trailing off as you read it properly.
An impromptu visitor graced the halls of the Richmond university faculty building on Monday in the form of Mr. Roy Kent, number six and Captain at AFC Richmond. He had a lot to say about you, and about your recent assignment, most notably that he’d ‘massively fucked up’ and was a ‘gigantic arsehole’.
He explained everything about why you submitted your work incomplete, and assured us you were not to blame. I’ve taken this into consideration, and have remarked your work today on my own time. When before you were capped at 40/100, I have remarked your work at 87/100; a grade A1.
Congratulations. You must be doing something right for those footballers.
“Shut the fuck up!” you screeched, jumping up from your desk at lightspeed.
You could hardly believe it. This was what Roy had done on Monday, after he’d left training for the day? He’d gone and knocked on the door of your fucking lecturer, not leaving until they understood that he’d messed up the assignment for you. This was immense, and not at all what you’d been expecting. That explained Roy’s aversion to you over the past few days, and the abrupt fall in the gym today.
You let out a shocked cackle. It reverberated around the walls of your square office, bouncing back into your ears and only making you laugh more. This was hilarious– a footballer such as Roy Kent taking it upon himself to do something so rash was incredibly comical. But, it also warmed your heart. He’d felt so bad that he’d taken matters into his own hands.
This was probably the nicest thing anyone had ever done for you, if you thought about it too hard. This was a grand gesture, a proper apology, if you’d ever seen one. It made you smile like the fucking sun in the sky.
Roy left the stadium after everyone else, taking extra care after his fall in the gym. He’d scraped his knee up pretty bad, and even gone to the resident first aider for a knee brace to make sure he was fine before the first match of the season that Saturday. He made his way out, entering into the car park. He was expecting his lone Jeep to be there, but was surprised to find you leaning against the hood. Your arms were crossed, bag on your shoulder, as you looked out at the setting sun over the green grass of the Dogtrack. He slowed to a stroll, tightening his grip on the straps of his gym bag. You turned your gaze and met his eye, shooting him a knowing look.
“Working overtime?” you asked. It was a redundant question. You had a look in your eye that Roy could sense from a mile off– you knew.
“Just making up for lost time at the start of the week,” he replied, coming to stand opposite you.
You stood up straight, and peered up at him. “Ah, yes. I heard you disappeared on Monday.”
“Did you now?” he said. “Who said that?”
You shrugged, stalling to get the point. You were enjoying the silent amusement between you. Both of you knew what was up, but you had to admit you liked the subtle tension. “Just Ted.”
“Oh,” Roy said, his tone the slightest bit sunken.
“And my lecturer, actually,” you said finally. “He emailed me an hour ago to tell me that you popped in for a visit the other day.”
“Really?” Roy faked confusion.
“Mhm.” You tried not to laugh. “He remarked my assignment. I got an A.”
Just like that, all the stress and tension in Roy’s chest dissipated. It flew into the sky and was caught by the breeze instantly. You smiled at him knowingly, regarding him thoughtfully. He shuffled on his spot awkwardly, looking out towards the setting sun on the horizon, over the pitch.
“That’s great,” he let out genuinely.
You stepped forward. “You didn’t have to do that, Roy.”
He snapped his stare on you. “Yes, I fucking did. I was an arsehole.”
You shrugged, scuffing the ground with your shoe. “You were an arsehole, yeah. But arsehole’s don’t go to my fucking uni and ask my lecturer to remark an assignment.” You scoffed.
“It was the least I could do,” he said, and there was a softness in his tone that you didn’t think he’d been capable of. Roy Kent left you with more question marks the more you spoke to him, but you liked a mystery.
“Well, thank you,” you said, peering up at him sweetly. There was a section of yourself that was different, softer, sweeter, reserved only for those rare moments where people fully exposed themselves to you. Their true intention, their true selves. This was one of those moments. “Really. Thank you, Roy.”
He nodded at you, not knowing what to add. The sun cast an orange glow over the car park, reflecting off his Jeep vibrantly. It looked like the car itself was bright orange, so different from the black paint that stuck out like a sore thumb, usually. His car was so big and bulking, the same as the man that stood before you. But you knew that wasn’t all he was, not after what he’d done for you.
“Heading home?” he asked, changing the subject.
You nodded. “I’m exhausted.”
He scoffed. “You and me both.”
“How are you feeling about Saturday? The Arsenal game?”
Roy shook his head. “Let’s not even go there today,” he said, and you immediately backed off. You knew it was a lot of the team, having both a new management team, in the form of Ted and Beard, on top of someone new skulking around the building– you.
“It’ll be the first football game I’ve ever gone to, you know?” you added.
Roy perked his brow at you. “You really know fuck all about football, don’t you?”
You scoffed abruptly. “Fuck all indeed.”
The smallest smile graced Roy’s face, and you found yourself savouring it. You didn’t want to jinx it, but after almost two weeks of headbutting, you wanted to believe it was over. Perhaps, you and Roy would coexist happily now. Without the meanness, or the miscommunication, or all of the inbetween. In terms of the team, you’d done well with the crew and the boys, bar Roy and Rebecca, but things were looking up.
You felt content again, like you could actually do this after all.
“Need a ride?” Roy asked suddenly.
“Oh,” you let out, looking back at his Jeep. The orange was fading from its reflection. “Sure, I could use a lift.”
“Hop in,” Roy said, as he made his way around to the driver’s side.
He shoved his bag into the backseat, as you opened the passenger side door and jumped in. You slammed it behind you, getting comfortable, as Roy jumped into the driver’s seat next to you. There was a comfortable silence that settled over the car, as the two of you buckled yourselves in. Roy turned on the engine, and the radio turned on harshly, blasting you with an 80s song far too loudly.
You both flinched back, wincing, and Roy clicked a button quickly, turning off the sound. “Fucking hell,” he said. “I think Heart are trying to deafen us.”
You let out a chuckle. “I’ll listen to 80s music over the charts any day.”
Roy perked his brows at you, putting the car in reverse. “Good on you.” He reversed out of the car park and turned onto the main road.
You didn’t talk much, just small talk here and there. It felt oddly intimate being driven home by Roy Kent, but you tried not to let it rattle you. Acquaintanceships always started off patchy, with neither wanting to step over a line, until something resembling friendship ended up shining through. You told yourself that, maybe, a few months down the line, it would be normal for you to catch a lift home with Roy in the week.
You directed him to your street, pointing at your door with a smile. Roy pulled up to the curb, cutting off his engine as you unbuckled your seatbelt. You weren’t expecting him to fully kill the engine, but you didn’t pay it any mind. You jumped out of the car onto the road and rushed onto the pavement, peering up into his, now open, window.
“Thanks for the ride,” you said with a smile.
“It’s fine. I live just around the corner, actually.”
“Don’t tell me you live in one of those big fuck off houses down the street,” you said, pointing down the end of your road. To the left beyond was an array of giant houses, all with blossom trees outside and large gates guarding them. They were gorgeous, huge and expensive.
Roy squinted at you. “I’m a professional footballer. Of course, I fucking do.”
You huffed in amusement. You were about to say I can’t wait to see it in person one day, but stopped yourself short. Was that a weird thing to say, even to a colleague? You bit on your tongue instead and stepped back towards the steps that lead to your door. There was something unsaid in the air, mostly from Roy. You got the sense he wanted to say something more, as his fingers tapped anxiously on the steering wheel.
Instead, you sighed. “See you tomorrow,” you settled on.
Roy inhaled deeply, and raised his hand in goodbye. “See you.”
His window ascended and he started the engine again. He sped off down the road, before he took an abrupt left at the end and disappeared from view. You let yourself into your building and stepped into the hallway. You sighed once more, contentedly, before you closed the door on another interesting day at AFC Richmond.
CHAPTER TWO
#roy kent x reader#roy kent x you#roy kent#ted lasso#brett goldstein#ff#fanfiction#x reader#reader insert#enemies to friends to lovers#angst and fluff#lightyaers#ao3#wattpad#archive of our own#writeblr#jamie tartt
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AEIWAM : what are the divisions specialities actually ? Like obviously the 4th heal and the 11h fight but like. The 9th? Do crosswords?
BOY AM I GLAD YOU ASKED BECAUSE THIS IS SOME OF THE BEST RETROACTIVE WORLD BUILDING I HAD TO DO AND I'M PROUD OF IT.
So in canon, almost none of the guard squads have "specialist" jobs, mostly because it's not terribly important to the plot, and because the court guards were essentially formed as an ad-hoc mercenary gang to protect one city specifically, but since Yamamoto didn't have to remain loyal to any noble family specifically, he kept getting pulled in as an arbiter and more and more responsibilities heaped upon him until the Court guard squads were acting as a De-Facto government, until the old man got pissed off with being involved in everybody else's business and rounded up a gang of nerds to do that for him so he could go do sword stuff. Seriously, everything about the administrative Bullshit in Soul Society makes sense when viewed through the lens of 'this shit was made ad-hoc out of what was available by people who only kind of knew what they were doing.
So the main government of Soul Society functions approximately like so:
Royal Guard:
Only technically part of the government, the Royal guard consists of The Monk who is responsible for making sure nobody steals any more of the soul king's body parts, and the four people he chose to help/didn't want left unattended in the Spirit World: The Guy who makes Zanpaktou, the Guy who can (theoretically) heal the Soul King, the lady who can literally mess with the fabric of reality and the lady who can create new souls. They spend nearly all their time in the Royal Realm trying to prevent the universe from unrevealing further, and don't really have administrative power so much as if any one of them decided to, they could wreck house of anyone in the spirit world, so if they say something, the central 46 listens and obeys.
Central 46:
The Highest Administrative level, sets society-wide policies, mediates disputes between provinces, wrangles the noble houses, assigns aid and designs social programs. It's comprised of 46 sages and other wise people appointed by the 46 as they die off. IN THEORY "Let a bunch of academics and philosophers who presumably know what they're doing make policy" isn't *that* bad an idea by itself, but it got coupled with "Also, to make sure these guys aren't being bribed or politically pressured, let's keep them in near-total isolation :)" and that's when things got weird.
The Central 46 does try it's best to maintain a peaceful and prosperous society, but it's got to strike a weird balance and the isolation sure does not fucking help maintain a cognizant worldview.
Noble Houses:
So the soul society, by the way they measure time*, only JUST got out of a major warring states period because magical Germany invaded and the guy that lead the army also managed to get The Mandate Of Heaven, but a lot of those formerly-warring states are still around, especially the ones that stole pieces of the soul king. They're not governmental bodies, but the families have shitloads of money, private armed forces and political influence. Think of the worst possible combination of magacorporation, mercenary army and royal dynasty. The are, unfortunately, still a political force to be reckoned with.
*Badly.
Provincial Governors:
So the Soul Society is divided up into Districts like so:
(Embiggen to actually see the damn thing)
The Seireitei is in the center, with the districts counting out until the central 46 got to the outer edge they could theoretically get forces and/or emergency food to in under a month and declared everything after that "District 80" AKA "You're on your own" No taxes are collected in the 80th district and people who don't want to deal with the soul society government often try to strike it on their own out there.
Each of those little rectangles is a district, and each of them has approximately the same number of people living in it- the lower districts are densely populated and, due to their proximity to the Seireitei, well-developed. The districts generally get less developed and less densely populated as you get farter from the center, but this varies wildly by the competence of that district's Daimyo or Governor. West 51 is a much more developed district than it's position would dictate, because it's Daimyo is canny and made good use of it's mineral resources and position in inter-mountain shipping. South 14 Should be one of the nicest districts, but their Governor is a moron who keeps picking fights with the neighboring districts like he's allowed to annex them, and the district has been sanctioned from hell to breakfast over it.
Gotei-13 / Court Guard Squads:
Sort of the executive branch of the Central 46, founded out of Yamamoto's gang of criminals he rounded up to deal with the Quincy invasion back when Rome was collapsing. So the court guard acts out the orders of the Central 46, and *theoretically* has authority over the noble houses and provincial governors, but they are pretty much constantly dancing on the edge of another warring states period, so things can get... tricky.
ALSO DID NOT HELP that The Monk who guards what's left of the Soul King came down from the Royal Realm and foisted a bunch of trans-dimensional responsibilities onto them but the Specific duties of the 13 court guards in AEIWAM are as follows:
(It's worth noting that the order of the court guard squads was determined literally by the order that the 12 criminals signed the agreement with Yamamoto to protect the seireitei, not the order of importance)
Division 1: ADMINISTRATION Oh god there is so much coordination to do between the central 46, the running of internal affairs, recruitment, training new shinigami, coordinating assignments that take more than one division's input. securing and distributing funding, etc. It's main jobs are: assigning work based on policy from the central 46, running the Shinigami Academy, and actually running the Gotei-13.
Division 2: SPY SHIT Gotei-13 is a shady-ass organization with a lot of enemies and that's not about to change. The second division is responsible for keeping an eye on the provinces and noble houses and anything else of interest, "Handling things quietly" for the Gotei-13, and preventing the Central 46 from being corrupted or assassinated. The Shihon Clan has historically held the captainacy of the 2nd division as part of the compromise Yamamoto struck with the noble houses at the founding of the court guard squads to end the civil wars- that each of the 4 noble houses would hold a captain's position, until the noble houses fell apart or the court guard did. This gave the Shihon clan a GREAT incentive to undermine the shit out of other noble houses, and Yamamoto gave them his blessing to do so. Ironically, the Shihon clan was one of the first to collapse.
Division 3: INTERNAL AFFAIRS Law Enforcement, but specifically the Seireitei and shinigami/martial court/jail. The court guard kind of lives and dies by how much it's respected* and it's essential the Gotei-13 follow strict ethical standards and also a tight adherence to authority lest one of the squads break off and start a civil war. Accepting Bribes and Defying Orders are much more severe crimes than say, excessive collateral damage. The 3rd division is responsible for investigating complaints, mediating disputes between divisions, and generally making sure everyone is behaving properly. *By the noble houses, Daimyos and central 46. The average civilian? not so much.
Division 4 Medical This division was actually the FIRST established, even before the court guard really became Squads. It was Chigiri and her pack of field surgeons that commanded Yamamoto's respect and gave him the idea of letting the other criminals have minions too. 4th divison is responsible for maintaining the health of the court guard- not just emergency medicine, but vaccinations, post-service medical care, and civil sanitation- keeping the streets clean and water safe is the #1 way to prevent deaths. Until recently, this meant a lot of trained medics were doing a lot of grunt work, until Zaraki, a guy from districts where Dysentery is still the #1 killer, successful argued a proposal to Unohana that her medics should be managing other, less-in-demand squads doing the labor, which would get the jobs done a hell of a lot faster, and not back up triage as much. Unohana, who had previously not *trusted* other squads to do the work reliably, finally relented and accepted some damn help.
Division 5: Rukongai Affairs The 5th division is responsible for coordinating efforts between the Gotei-13 and the Provincial Governors- Hollow Eradication, Disaster Relief, additional armed forces to help local police, Helping distribute grain to mitigate famine, etc.
Division 6: External Affairs Responsible for representing the Gotei-13 to other groups and dealing with Noble House Bullshit specifically. While Noble House Bullshit is 95% of what they do, but technically, they're also responsible for handling diplomatic relations with the Beastfolk in the eastern districts, Las Noches after the winter war in the west, Any Kami that might come through, and Hell, if they ever get a line open. The Kuchiki family has held the 6th Division captaincy for generations as a peacekeeping measure between the gotei-13 and the noble houses.
Division 7: Incoming Souls The reason the soul society doesn't reunite people with their families when they die is that they do not actually have control over who reincarnates as themselves (and if they retain their memories), who is reborn as a baby in the spirit world, and what district they get assigned to- that's all decided at the moment of a Soul's death by Hell, using a Metric the Shinigami can only guess at. That said, the 7th still can do a lot- Souls that had to be cleansed with Konsho go through the 7th division and are escorted to their assigned districts. Other, non-hollowfied but odd case souls will end up in the pocket dimension that serves as the queue into the afterlife- people with high spiritual power, animals that achieved personhood in the world of the living and other nonhuman persons, and somtimes spirits who were almost certainly supposed to go to a different afterlife all come through. The 7th division is also charged with keeping a running tally on important statistics like the relative balance between souls, who got hollowfied and why, collecting data on who goes to hell when konsho is prefromed on them and why, and other data to try and work out Hell's metric backwards.
Division 8: Income and Funding The court guard squads are... kind of taxpayer funded. The Daimyos collect taxes from civilians, they pay those taxes to the central 46, and the central 46 disburses some of that money to the Gotei-13, but the truth is, for all the duties they're expected to preform, they're wildly underfunded. So the court guard has had to get... inventive to make sure everyone gets paid and they can do what they need to. Investments in industries, ownership of weird land grants, taking out loans, selling merchandise and straight-up schmooze have all been used by the 8th division to make sure the bills get paid. Shunsui is, by that measure, the best captain the division has ever had- he's shrewd and had astonishingly good luck when it comes to finances so there hasn't been a pay strike since he took over. Probably his best idea was handing the branding and product design of the Gikon to the Shinigami Women's Association- that one paid mad dividends.
Division 9: Information Services The ninth division is most famously home to the Seireitei's first and most largely-ciculated newspaper, but it's also the records office, PAYROLL, library, document archives, data collection and data analytics. Also, tech support. Also also: manage all the arts programs, propaganda and festivals. This is why Kaname was load-bearing to Aizen's plan.
Division 10: Living World Affairs The 10th division was responsible for monitoring the living world- mostly keeping track of hollow appearances, but also: what the remaining Quincies are up to, reporting back on useful technological advancements, any other weird shit that turns up there, and keeping track of all the Shinigami on deployment to the living world (mostly 10th division but the post-war population boom means every division's having to chip in now.
Division 11: Emergency/Heavy Deployment Every time the Gotei-13 had to do some heavy lifting, it's the 11th division's job. Mass outbreak of hollows? 11th's job. Emergency Dam repair to prevent a flood? 11th division muscle time. Daimyo got funny ideas about conquering a neighboring district? 11th division. Funcking Quincies again? 11th division. Rampaging Kami afflicted by a terrible curse? you know who to call. This was the SECOND Division to be founded, because the actual sentence that came out of Yamamoto's mouth was "Chigiri, you and your gremlins put my guts back in, Yachiru, round up some assholes and DEAL WITH THAT FUCKING THING." and the 11th's prerogative and hiring practices have not changed since. Since the 11th's work is more intermittent, there are long periods between jobs for them, and it's only recently they've been allowed to pitch in on regular maintenance and rehabilitate their reputation as a bunch of lazy degenerates.
Divison 12: Supplies (more recently, Research and Development) Prior to Kisuke Urahara's weird science boner, the 12th Division's primary job was the manufacture and supply of everything the Shinigami would need to do their jobs. Uniforms, Gigai, medical supplies, communicators, rations, Gikon, the actual buildings in the Seireitei, bedding, Protective gear- if a Shinigami received it for their job, it was made by the 12th division. Despite previous captain Kirio Hikifune being the most accomplished chef in the history of Soul Society, it's Mayuri that has made the most profound mark on Soul Society Cuisine with the fast-prepared, acceptable-tasting and surprisingly nutritious meals he developed to deal with the mass influx of souls after WW2, and the franchise distribution centers combined with his attempts at children's educational programming mean that Mayuri occupies a cultural niche in Soul Society not unlike Krusty The Clown.
Division 13: Magical Research, Kido Corps Until recently, the Kido Corps was a seperate division governed under the purview of the central 46, and the 13th division was doing it's research into Hado, Bakudo and Haikido independently, but as the two organizations worked increasingly closely together, they began to share more until the catastrophic events of Turn Back The Pendulum left the Kido Corps severely depleted and without leadership, at which point Yamamoto persuaded the central 46 to let the 13th division absorb the rest of the Kido corps and take on their work.
So that's how the government in Soul Society is SUPPOSESD to work.
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welcome to the stage...
a Joel Miller one shot: Flip the Switch
Pairing: CEO!Joel Miller x F!Reader Prompt from @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog:
𝕡𝕒𝕚𝕣𝕚𝕟𝕘 =Santa!Joel x elf!reader 𝕡𝕣𝕠𝕞𝕡𝕥 = you’ve been a lazy elf so Santa Joel punishes you
Summary: You've been tasked with being Joel's 'Helper Elf' at this year's Christmas Party and good god do you hate your job... Rating: Explicit 18+ (MDNI) Word Count: 3,562 Content Warning: DubCon, Smutty smutty smut smut, fingering (f receiving), p in the v - unwrapped, degradation, power plays, power imbalance, boss / employee dynamic, swiches, dom/sub dynamic, name calling, couch fucking Author's Notes: I am @not-a-unique-snowflake-blog's Secret Santa and I am so sorry for how late this is, bb! I am thankful for you and I hope you enjoy my first foray our of the chubby universe.
Thank you to @softpascalito, @theywhowriteandknowthings & @neverwheremoonchild for their eyes and beta skills. 💜🥦💜
Santa-baby-I've-been-an-swful-good-girl regards,
Beefro👌🥦💜
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When you’d been asked to dress as Joel’s ‘Helper Elf��� to his ‘CEO Santa’, you’d scoffed at the idea, already planning on resigning from being one of his company’s administrative assistants. You were tired of the long hours and being worked to the bone for very little pay and respect, but you decided to hold off to see the shitshow that the company’s Christmas party would be since Joel himself was in charge of planning it.
Joel was an egotistical brute who had no business being allowed to mingle with people in an enclosed space. His only saving graces were his brother, Tommy – CFO and President, and the only one who could rein him in - and his stupidly handsome, brooding good looks. He infuriated you; he knew he could get away with just about anything because he was the boss and most of the peons were scared shitless of his brutal tirades being directed at them. He threw it in almost anyone’s face how loaded he was and that he owned them. You hated him as much as you loved how quickly you came on your vibrator when though about his voice, his eyes, his hands that were burned into your memory. Fuck Joel Miller and fuck his cocky fucking smirk.
The day of the party you’d been given a cheap, sleezy looking elf costume with an email soon landing in your inbox with instructions to wear it that night, along with what your duties would be. Rolling your eyes, you read the email and realized that you would be spending the entire evening at Joel’s side, truly being his ‘Helper Elf’. You were to make sure he knew every person’s name (you rolled your eyes because if he really gave a shit about the people who worked for him, he’d already know their names), make sure he had food and a drink available to him all night (great – you were going to be a glorified personal waitress for the douchebag), make sure the event ran smoothly (as the one who apparently planned the event, why was this up to you?), had out gifts as ‘Santa’s Helper’ to the employees (groan…), and lastly, keep him company throughout the evening.
The whole thing made you rethink waiting to quit and you huffed, looking down at the cheap, probably highly flammable, elf costume on your desk.
“Fuck it.”, you groaned, picking it up and shoving it into your purse and heading to the bathroom to change.
*****
You were silently cheering yourself on. All evening, you’d made a conscious decision to be as annoying and useless as possible for Joel, and boy oh boy!, you’d gotten under his skin. Two hours into the party, and Joel had gone to get his third refill at the bar because you weren’t ‘paying attention’ and he’d also missed out on most of the buffet because you ‘forgot’ to get him a plate. You’d also managed to ‘unknowingly’ give him several wrong names, making him look like an ass towards several employees who’s names he really should have known. When it came time to hand out presents, you conveniently were ‘required’ to make yourself scarce and were unable to help.
While he’d barely said more than a few sentences to you, his scowl said everything you needed to be satisfied. At this point, you’d had more than a few drinks, and while you still maintained your professionalism, you’d stopped adjusting your skimpy elf costume and let it ride up higher on your thigh as you sat next to Joel. You’d caught him looking down at your bare lap more than once, making you grin to yourself.
*****
You had to give him his due; Joel had managed to put on a not-mediocre, standard office Christmas party. It was more than you thought he was capable of. That, and the fact that he kept the stupid Santa suit on the entire evening and posed for pictures with anyone who asked. You swear you might have even seen a genuine smile on his face when his brother came up for a picture dressed as a reindeer.
What really made you happy though was when Tommy asked Joel how his night was going, and you heard him respond, “Strapped me with a lazy fuckin’ elf, Tommy…” as his face held a cold sneer.
Right under that smile was the asshole who you’d found so much delight in needling all night.
By the time the party wrapped up, you figured you’d done your duty and you’d be free to go home and continue the party with a cheap bottle of wine and your cat. Everyone else had left and as you grabbed your bag from under the table, you heard Joel’s telltale stomps come up behind you. Before you could turn around, he had his hands on your waist, pushing you against the table.
“Think you’re bein’ cute, sugar?”, he growled into your ear.
“The fuck are you doing?!”, you snapped back, trying to wriggle out of his grasp more out of surprise than disgust.
He held you tighter, his thick fingers digging into your waist, and you could feel your panties getting wet.
“Don’t you fuckin’ move… can you follow that fuckin’ direction?”
“Oh Jesus! Just fuck off!”, you snarled back, again, trying halfheartedly to remove his hands from you, but hoping he didn’t let go.
He grunted as you shoved him back and turned around. You both stood and glared at each other, daring the other to make the first move. A small, menacing grin spread on Joel’s face as he took a few slow steps towards you.
“No one’s fucked the Christmas spirit into you yet, sugar?”, he growled, licking his lips and roughly pushing you back onto the table.
“Oh, fuck you! You couldn’t fuck a quack into a duck, you asshole.”
He raised his eyebrow at you and gave you a warning look before roughly gripping your chin and forcing you to look up at him. He brought his face close to you and stared down at you meanly.
“You’re a shitty helper elf. Don’t you dare be a shitty lay, too.”
Before you could respond, he hoisted you up on the table, shoved the skirt of your dress up around your waist and pushed his fingers against your clothed core, making you let out an involuntary moan and a buck of your hips.
“Fuckin’ sweet, sugar…”, he purred, eyeing you with a grin.
You rolled your eyes and groaned against his touch. “You’re a disgusting old man, Miller.”
“Fuck, you’ve got a nasty little mouth on you…”, he murmured with a devilish grin as he pushed your legs apart and stood between them.
You swallowed hard as he grasped your neck. His other hand’s fingers moved between you and his eyes fluttered. He groaned when he felt how wet you were through your panties.
“Fuckin’ eh, sugar…”, he cooed, returning his softer gaze towards you. “You wet for daddy?”
You sucked in a breath as he circled your covered clit with his index finger, and tried to sound as firm as you could. “Fuck off with that ‘daddy’ shit, Miller.”
He tsk’d you, griping your throat tighter. “You and your mouth, sugar…”, he chuckled, watching you squirm, then growled. “You’re gonna be begging me to be your daddy when I’m done with you.”
That was it. This man had fucked around enough with you as your boss and now he wanted to demean you like this? Pulling yourself together, you pushed his chest and shoved him off you with all your might and before he could pounce on you again, you quickly moved to the side, causing him to lean over the table.
You shoved him forward, and to your surprise, he didn’t resist. Instead, he chuckled. “What’re you gonna – “
It infuriated you that despite your rejection of him, he was still smiling and seemingly enjoying himself.
“Just shut up!”, you snarled back, snaking your hand around his front and gripping his infuriatingly impressive cock through his cheap, fuzzy red pants.
“You fuckin’ shit… you’ll never be my daddy…” You could feel him get harder as you growled into his ear. “Too fuckin’ old to even pin me down…”
“Ungh…sugar… oh fuck…”, he panted, rutting his hips and griding his cock against your hands.
The fact that Joel was getting off to your less-than-kind words was not lost on you and you scoffed.
“This how you’re gonna get off, Joel?”, you cooed coldly into his ear as he panted. “Big tough Miller gets off to girls telling him no?”
“Please… sugar… fuck… please…”
“That the best you can do? You’re pathetic, you know that?”, you snapped at him as you shoved the front of his pants down, freeing his cock.
You stood back and tugged his arm, signalling him to turn over, and when he did, his cock did not disappoint. He was huge and the head was angry and weeping. He watched your face, eyes staring in wonderment at his dick as your mouth parted, jaw going slack. He grinned and chuckled, causing your eyes to meet his, only making you angrier with him.
“Fuck you, Miller!”
“Calm down, sugar… not the first whore to get cock dumb on me…”, he cooed, still with a smug grin on his face. He reached out trying to pull your hand to his member.
You yanked your hand away and spat into your palm before gripping his cock and starting to jerk him.
“Fuck you, Miller.”, you seethed lowly. “Fuck you and your fuckin’ smug face.”
“Why you – fuck… why you so pissed, sugar?”
“You’re such a pompous dick! So fuckin’ arrogant and you’re a shit boss.”, you fumed, continuing to pump his cock, causing him to pant. “Throwin’ your money in people’s faces, not knowing their names… someone better put you on your place, Miller. After tonight, I quit, you smug fuck!”
It was like a switch flipped; he snapped out of his submissive and amused state as soon as the words left your mouth. He gripped your wrist, ripping it off his cock and sat up, his other hand going around your throat.
“I don’t think so, sugar. You’re not going anywhere.”
He stood up, holding your wrist and throat, and guided you backwards to the couch and pushed you down on it. You fell back, your legs parted, and he took advantage of this. Joel leaned over you, pushed your panties to the side, and shoved two of his thick fingers into your sopping wet cunt, causing you to yelp.
“You can take it, sugar.”, he smiled menacingly at you, then growled through clenched teeth, “And you’re gonna take it.”
He pounded up into you with one hand while the other gripped your hair in his fist. The sounds that came from your mouth were foreign to you. Yeah, you liked it rough, but this was different. This was your soon-to-be former boss, finger banging you on a couch after a Christmas party and after you’d just about had him wailing your name. You had no idea what had happened to flip him, and before you could get too deep into your thoughts, he hit the perfect spot. That sweet, spongy spot in your pussy that less than half the me you’d fucked had even accidentally grazed, and here was Joel, repeatedly hitting it like it was a doorbell it was an emergency house call.
“Oh fuck!... right th - yes!... fuck… Joel, there… yes!”
As you felt your walls start to flutter and when that white hot heat started its ascent, he pulled away, grin on his lips.
You sat up on your elbows and looked at him, mouth open and eyes pleading. “What are y-?”
“Fuck you, that’s what.”, he grunted with a grin, shoving his slick fingers into his mouth and sucking.
You could only stare up at him in response. When he finally deemed his fingers clean, he pulled them out of his mouth with a pop and grinned at you.
“Tell you what, sugar. You take back what you said, and I’ll fuck you right here on this couch like you deserve.”
Confused, you continued to lookup at him until it dawned on you.
“You want me to not quit?”
He nodded, grin dropping from his face.
“You think I worked Tommy over to let you be my fuckin’ ‘Elf’ and put up with your bullshit attitude tonight for you to just quit on me, sugar?”, he asked lowly, leaning over you, pinning your head between his elbows.
“Think I haven’t watched that fuckin’ body of yours sashay ‘round the office and had to fuck my fist when I finally got alone?”, he crooned is a husky whisper, pressing his hot mouth on your neck and alternating between licking and nipping your skin. “Think I don’t notice your ass in those skintight skirts and imagine you sittin’ on my face?”
You let out a moan and gripped his shoulders, trying to pull him further into you. He quickly pulled back and sat up on his knee packed between your open legs, and grabbed your hands.
“I’m not hearin’ what I need to, sugar…”
You were frustrated and needy, hating that he had gotten the upper hand on you. Stubbornly, you shook your head.
“Fuck you, Miller. You’re a shit boss and a shit person and I’m not gonna let you fuck around and get nothin’ in return!”
His eyes darkened and his frown hardened into a scowl. He gripped your chin, pulling you up to him as he leaned down to you, feeling his hot breath on your face.
“Listen here, you little bitch. If that’s what you really want, I’ll send you outta here with my fuckin’ bastard in your belly whether you like it or not as a reminder of what you fucked up.”, he growled, holding you stare as if to challenge you.
You could feel your slick flowing from you, dripping out of your cunt and down your crack. Your mind and body were screaming ‘yes’ and ‘no’ in a pathetic battle with themselves at his threat.
“Or…”, his tone softened, as did his grip on your chin, “you can stay and get a promotion.’”
Your face morphed from pleading to confused again. “A-a promotion?”
“A promotion?”, he mocked. ”Yeah, sugar. A fuckin’ promotion.”
He lazily dragged his hand down your body, slipping it between your legs again and into your panties, and began rubbing small, light circles around your clit. You shifted, brows folding as you fought to keep your breath steady and eyes on him, refusing to break again and beg him again.
“You’re good at your job, and I agree… you don’t get enough for all your hard work. How ‘bout this, baby… you work exclusively for me… be my girl here… my helper elf all year round – minus the shitty, bratty attitude you came here tonight with – and I pay you what you’re worth…”
It took all your strength to not cave right then and there, but you were stubborn. “A personal cocksleeve for the office? How fuckin’ charming.”, you snapped back, in a voice far shakier and breathier than you had hoped it would be.
Joel smiled and chuckled darkly, continuing to tease your clit.
“You keep actin’ like you don’t want this, sugar, but my hand can feel your poor little pussy throbbin’ and needin’ me… and I’m sure your bank account would appreciate my attention as well.”
“Fuck you.”
“I plan on it, baby.”, he grinned menacingly. “But I gotta know how you want it… one last fuck… or…”
He nudged his nose against yours.
“My own, personal, little sugar… who’s so good at her job… and can keep me in my place when she wants… get me on my knees and make me beg… and let me fuck her into submission when I need it.”
When you tried to push up against him, he held you in place, keeping his fingers in your folds and his face close to yours in an act of dominance.
“No… I’m the boss right now, sugar, and I asked you a question. I expect an answer.”
You couldn’t help the whimper that crept out of your throat and that was all Joel needed. He kissed you, softly at first then increasing the fervour, prying your mouth open with his lips and tongue. Teeth and spit helping your faces mash together. The hand he had between your legs moved to his waistband and he pulled it down, again, freeing his cock then gripping it. He pulled back slightly and slid its thick head through your slick.
“Tell me you want it, sugar…”, he grunted, looking at you from under heavy eyelids.
“Fuck…”, you breathed out, your pussy clenching on nothing. “I… of fuckin’ course I want it!”
“Ask nicely, sugar. Drop the attitude.”
“Fuck… please… please, Joel! I want it… I want you… I wanna be… fuck you for making me say it… I wanna get that promoti – aah!.”
Before the last syllable could come from your mouth, Joel pushed your panties aside and shoved his cock into your heat, giving no grace period for you to adjust.
“S’what I thought, sugar.”, he huffed out in a grin.
“Please… oh fuck, please move, Joel!”
“Yeah? Why? ‘Cause your pussy’s too tight for me? ‘Cause you haven’t been fucked by a man with a big dick and bank account?”, he cooed, tilting his hips to push further into you, his tip pressed firmly against your cervix.
“Fuck! Yes… please!”, you yelped, squirming under him. All thoughts of trying to take any control back were being forced out of you by his dick and he knew it.
His smug grin stayed firmly on his face as he pulled out in a painfully slow movement before slamming back in, pushing you further up the couch. He grabbed your hips and held you as he did it again.
“Faster… faster, Joel…”
He shook his head, still grinning. “Uh-uh…”
He kept his slow exit, harsh entry going as he watched your face contort and your cunt clench and release him. You were sure he was just torturing you, but the way he looked down at your face and body mixed with the even pace he was keeping and his size, you knew he knew what he was doing. You could feel the heat building up again, and he could, too.
“That’s it, sugar… I can feel it… come on, baby… lemme have it…”
The wave of your first orgasm hit you, rippling through your body and pulling a long, loud moan from your mouth.
“Oh, good girl!… finally, takin’ directions… good girl…”
He let you start to come down before he picked up your foot, placed a kiss on your ankle and draped it over his shoulder.
“That’s right, sugar… did so good for me, now I’m gonna return the favour.”
He thrusted into you harshly and picked up the speed, forcing your spend out onto both your thighs and his curly thatch of salt and pepper hair that crowned his cock. He pummelled you over and over, bringing you to the cusp of another orgasm and pulled out.
“Turn around… on your knees, sugar.”, he grunted, swatting at you.
You had to fight your trembling body and shaky legs to move, but once you got up on your knees on the couch, back facing Joel, he took over and moved your body into position.
“Now I get it, baby… you behave when you know you’re gettin’ something…”, he chuckled, pushing your face against the cushioned headrest. “Gonna have to get a reward system in place… give you a gold star and a fuck when you do good…”
Before you could return a snappy comeback, he pushed his cock back into you, making the only sound your mouth could produce be a whine.
The angle that he was fucking you in was even better and more intense than before. His grunting and murmured praises filled the room along with the wet, vulgar noises of his cock impaling your cunt. You felt another orgasm coming on, but it was more. Your pants turned to whiny yelps and moans and you felt like something was about to burst.
“Joel… Joel!”
“I know… can feel it… come for me, sugar… come on…”
“Joel… it’s – unhg!... I’m…”
You felt the bubble burst and cried out, collapsing on the couch. Joel let out a grunt-turned-moan at the flood of liquid pouring out of you, holding your hips, and continuing to fuck into you. His thrusts got sloppy and as you leaned on the back of the couch for support, he punched into you one last time, holding your hips against him tightly as he unloaded himself into your pussy with a loud groan.
When you tried to move, his hand moved to your back, soothing over it, as he panted. “Stay put, sugar… just… just stay put.”
You relaxed and laid forward, putting your weight on the couch, and closed your eyes. You could feel his cock twitching in you as it began to soften. His weight shifted and he pressed a kiss between your shoulder blades. The uncharacteristically gentle action made your eyes open abruptly and you sucked in a breath.
Joel’s chuckle reverberated against your back through his chest. “Congrats on your promotion, sugar.”
--------<3----------
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Here is the scene -
Shabbat dinner at a rabbi’s house with all the college kids from different schools in the area immersed in discussion. Spaghetti lines up high on each plate with a minimal serving of droopy artichoke. The rabbi made an announcement at the beginning of the meal that calories don’t work on Shabbat and we’re eating for two souls :
A girl I hadn’t met before- Dawn- was discussing the lawsuit set against her school for antisemitism. This is very common nowadays so I was nodding along, twirling noodle around my fork.
My friend , who we will call Duck, shook his head. “I’m lucky.” He stabbed a piece of artichoke. “My school is administratively failing, so that’s the focus. Not the world falling to crap.”
I nod along, eying the challah on the other side of the table.
“Joy, have you experienced anything?” Dawn asked, politely. I know she would’ve loved me to say “oh nothing! We’re actually beloved there!” But that wasn’t the case.
“Oh- uh! “ I jolted up. “No more than the usual.”
“Well,” Dawn peered at me. “What’s your ‘usual’?”
“Ah,” I took the moment to think. “Oh. Well. I started my conversion journey in October and all my freshman first semester friends cut me off because that made me complicit in genocide.”
Both of their eyes widened at me. “Oh G-d,” Dawn put down her fork. “I’m so sorry.”
“Oh don’t worry about it! You live, you learn.” I waved my hand. “Let’s see. Oh, oof, there was the time a Jewish kid got beat up and nearly thrown into traffic at a protest -“
“Really!?”
“Oh yeah,” I twirled spaghetti. “Our antisemitism teach in was canceled because we are “genocide colonizers” and it got dangerous to host. A professor made an entire class defend Hamas for a final paper,”
“No fucking way.” Duck breathed.
I shrugged. “Apparently, it was an 1800s philosophy class.” My two friends squawked before I continued. “We’ve got the cliche of ‘resistance is justified’ but I don’t think that’s anything unique-“
“You understand that’s still bad, right?” Dawn interrupted. I felt caught off guard, and answered slowly.
“Yeah of course. It’s just kinda lame. Lack of originality. There’s a bit more. Oh!” I snapped my fingers. “The Nazi thing!”
Dawn and Duck are both staring at me, in a daze. I felt like a commercial, head buzzing with so many examples that I wanted to say “but wait , there’s more!”
But instead of a free water bottle to go with whatever infomercial contraption there is, instead it was a long list of ways my life is passively and actively in danger.”
“I’m so sorry, Joy.” Duck began. Dawn nodded slightly. “I had no idea it was this bad. I was at a conference recently, and a lot of the talk was how bad your university has gotten. You guys might actually be the worst in the state.”
There are things I know logically. Like that I should eat more than 1.65 meals a day, that what I’ve been experiencing isn’t normal.
But it was Shabbat, my heart was as light as it could be, and I was here in my beloved community. I twisted my face into a grim smile. “Huh. Celebrity moment! Now, could you pass the challah?”
(I got like five extra pieces, so, you know! Perks to Jew hate!
Jokes, jokes.)
#fromgoy2joy thoughts#jumblr#jewish#jewish convert#jewblr#jewish tumblr#jewish conversion#antisemitism#tw antisemtism#jewish humor#dark Jewish humor#Jews by choice#jew by choice
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A Triple Love - Akashi X F!reader X Midorima
(18+ MDNI)
At the university of Tokyo, there was one apartment nearby that housed three of its students. These three students have the most unusual of relationships, for one they were polyarmorous. Secondly, the three have been in a happy relationship since middle school and remained together despite going to different high schools in different parts of the country. They were strong and steady as a rock. And, for the sake of the narrator's rhyme scheme, currently ready to fuck. You were moaning at the ferocious kisses given to you by Akashi at the moment, Midorima approaching the two of you as he unbuttoned his shirt. "Always so eager to be the first, nandayo." Midorima said with a sigh as his shirt dropped next to the bed. Akashi's mouth trailed to your neck, humming in response. "It's too early for jealousy Shintaro." You giggled and looked into your other lover's green eyes. "Come here." The green haired boy did as you asked and climbed onto the bed. Taller then the both of you, it was always a puzzle but you always made it fit. Midorima kissed you from your left side as Akashi left hickeys on your right collarbone. Akashi's hand trailed up your thigh and underneath your nightgown. His fingers quickly found your panties and you moaned against Midorima's mouth as he started teasing you through the fabric. Midorima licked your lower lip, asking for entrancewhich you gladly gave him. In that lovely yet dreaded fashion the boys had developed, Akashi timed himself perfectly in synch and his finger started penetrating you through the cloth of your panties just as Midorima's tongue slipped in your mouth. These boys definitely knew how to torture you well. You spread your legs wider, trying to give Akashi all the acces he needed. With a grin, he hooked your panties to the side and you felt the bed shift. You knew what was happening the moment you felt Akashi's hair brush your thighs and your walls clenched with anticipation. It did not take long before your upper and lower lips were getting assaulted by the delicious sensation of wet tongues and you moaned more harshly against Midorima's mouth. Akashi's tongue teased your pussy and you whimpered in Midorima's arms, who was not merciful in the slightest for he slid your nightgown's straps off your shoulders and slowly started to tease your nipples. You could feel yourself grow wet and you heard it too, the dirty sounds of Akashi's tongue playing with your wet hole filling the air. You could feel yourself wanting to be penetrated and Akashi could feel it too. He withdrew his face and looked at Midorima. "May I go first?" This was something unique, something no one would ever have expected from the Akashi Seijuro, to ask for someone's permission, but your two boyfriends had build that kind of respect over the years, and you and Midorima were the only ones who earned that right. Midorima sighed begrudginly but nodded much to Akashi's delight. Your green haired lover shifted to take his place behind you as he often would and started sucking on your neck as Akashi lined himself up before your entrance. You could feel Midorima's hands sliding over your body sensually as Akashi slowly pushed himself inside of you. One of Midorima's hands went up to cup your breast as the other pinched your clit. You hissed at the overstimulation of your pussy as Midorima started to roll your clit between his fingers. Akashi grinned at the sight of the two of you, reaching for your thighs before he began to pump your plump pussy with his cock. You mewled pathetically as Midorima teased your poor clit and it made you tighten around Akashi's rockhard member who sped up every time you clenched around him with your warm, wet walls. "Sei!' You breathed. You could already feel yourself approach climax at the wonderful administration of Midorima's fingers. "Come for us. Don't hold back darling." Akashi commanded as he hit you in your favorite spot and you could not help but squirt over the bedsheets, marking the boys as yours forever yet again.
#knb#kuroko's basketball#akashi seijuro#akashi#midorima#midorima shintaro#midorima shintaro x reader#akashi seijuro x reader#knb x reader#akashi seijuro x reader x midorima shintaro
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Halcyon - Ch. 3: Why don’t we try to actually get our shit together?
You and Joel come up with a plan. A continuation of Halcyon from the prologue through Ch. 2, a modern no outbreak AU TLOU fic found on Tumblr here.
Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader
Warnings: Some mild diet talk, no explicit mention of reader's weight or size (beyond she is smaller than Joel but my Joels are all giant, OK? Joel is like 6'5" Joel is a big big man, big big man). Modern No Outbreak AU, No use of Y/N, Slow burn, 18+ only, Minors DNI
Length: 5K
AO3 | Main Master List | Prologue | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter
“Sir, I can’t just… Well, I understand that you say that but…”
Amanda, the sophomore girl who worked the front desk of the English department offices, frowned, phone clutched against her head.
“I understand that,” she said again. “But she’s a special case, Professor…” She flinched and glanced up to see you coming in, looking relieved. “Sir? Give me just one second and I can check…” She pressed the hold button and lowered the receiver. “Professor, I am so so sorry, I know we’re not supposed to send unexpected calls or emails through to you but do you know a Joel Miller? He’s insisting he’s a friend of yours and…”
You raised your eyebrows before answering.
“Yeah, I know Joel. Go ahead and transfer him back to my office. And if he ever gives you a hard time again, tell him to fuck off.”
Amanda looked relieved and took Joel off hold as you went to the end of the hall and unlocked your door. You didn’t have to share an office like a few other people in your department. One of the perks, you imagined, of being a big name that got the university some attention. But you hadn’t done much with the space yet, the only thing on the wall a framed poster that the dean had waiting for you when you started there.
Your phone rang just as you set down your bag and you picked it up, tucking it against your shoulder.
“Yes, what do you want, I’m busy being very famous and important,” you said with a slight English accent.
“Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t realize best selling authors were such a hot commodity,” Joel said. “Should I make an appointment?”
“Probably,” you replied. He snorted. “What’s up?”
“Did you know that you tried to put your number in my phone the other night?” Joel asked. “Note that I say ‘tried’ because what you actually did was put something in my notes that has four numbers and then seven symbols which, if you’re counting, ain’t even the right number of digits.”
You scoffed.
“You’re lucky I didn’t change your passcode or set an alarm for 4:30 in the morning,” you said. “Sounds like you got off easy.”
“You’re a menace.”
“I know,” you said, smiling a little to yourself. “So why were you looking for my number on a Monday morning?”
“Because I was looking for your number on a Sunday morning and ended up shit outta luck,” he replied. “Figured I could catch you at work. They got you all locked down over there, huh?”
“Trying to discourage random readers from contacting me here is all,” you said. “There was a problem with that at Brown right when the book first got popular. I don’t think it’d be as much of a problem now but still, administration thought it was smart. Speaking of which, don’t be a shit to my office aide.”
“Makes sense, I guess,” he said, ignoring your last comment. “Think you can put me on the list of people who are allowed to talk to you? And on the list of people who are allowed to bring you food?”
“Bring me food?” You frowned.
“Well, yeah,” he said. “I was hoping I could do that. Like… today. In an hour or so. If you’re not shaping young minds or whatever.”
“Don’t you have work?” You laughed.
“New job starts tomorrow,” he said. “And I don’t exactly have a lot of time without Sarah where I’m not at work.”
“And you want to see me?”
“No, I figured I’d just call and annoy your secretary as a new hobby…”
“Office aide.”
“You free for lunch or not, Goldie?” He said, exasperated. You resisted the urge to laugh.
“Yeah,” you said. “Yeah, I’m free. I have a class gap from 11:30 to 2. I can meet you somewhere…”
“I’ll just come to you,” he said. “Assuming that a fancy schmancy professor will still eat tamale lady tamales…”
“OK you could have opened with tamale lady tamales,” you said. “Buried the lead there, Miller.”
Joel laughed.
“I’ll give you my number and you can text me where your office is,” he said. “Then I’ll have a way to contact you that isn’t fucking gibberish. See you in two hours.”
You put his number into your phone and texted him. He responded with a screenshot of your note with the message literally none of those numbers are right which made you laugh.
It was hard to focus as you taught your next class, checking your watch every few minutes to see just how much time had passed. You were keyed up, stomach tight, and you tried to talk yourself down as you walked half way across campus back to your office.
It was Joel. Just Joel. Sure, before Friday, you hadn’t seen or talked to him in years but falling back into friendship with him had felt so easy so far. He was safe and comfortable. You’d spent every day with Joel once upon a time.
But that felt so long ago now. You were different people then. Joel was a jock who pretty much just hung out with you and tried to speed run his way through every hot girl in school. You were a geek who spent her entire life either trailing along behind Joel or with her nose in a book. A lot had changed in the last decade and a half. Joel had a kid. You’d gotten married and divorced. Well, almost divorced. Nothing was finalized yet but you’d stopped wearing your wedding band when you moved to Texas even though it still sat on the ring stand on your bedside table.
After Friday and Saturday, you weren’t entirely sure if you were going to see Joel again. You hadn’t gotten his number and you remembered nothing of trying to put your number in his phone while you were drunk. You weren’t sure if it was going to be a fluke, just a blip on the radar of your lives that had gone on totally disconnected paths for more than a decade, or if this was something that would continue.
You weren’t sure what you wanted. Losing him the first time had hurt. It might have been the worst thing that had ever happened to you, even worse than losing your mother, than watching your sister sister fall apart in slow motion over the last decade, than your father entirely. Was it something you could survive again? Was it something you’d need to dig back up and talk through with Joel now that you were speaking again? If that was what he needed, was that something you could handle doing? You weren’t sure about any of it.
But you were already starting to think that you’d go along with anything Joel wanted as long as you got to keep him around this time, just like high school. He’d been the sun and you’d been caught in the gravity of him. You wondered if you’d ever escaped it at all.
You straightened up your office a bit, not that you’d had much time for things to get too messy. Most things were submitted virtually now, though you insisted on poetry being printed to make sure formatting was maintained, and most of your personal notes were contained to planners and notebooks that were in orderly piles on your desk. You were absently checking your email when there was a knock on the frame of your door and you looked up to see Joel standing there, a foil covered plate in one hand, two glass bottles of Dr. Pepper in the other.
“Oh my God, is that Dublin Dr. Pepper?” You gaped at him.
“Technically no,” he said, coming in and setting a bottle down in front of you. “Stopped making it at the Dublin plant years ago but basically the same thing. Hi, by the way.”
“Hi. And I’ll take basically the same thing,” you said, leaning forward to peer into the hall. “Do me a favor and close the door?”
He nudged it shut with his foot and you took the bottle, popping it open on the edge of your desk. Joel sat in the chair on the other side of your desk before he followed suit, smirking as he did.
“I didn’t want witnesses if I broke the desk I’ve had all of a month, OK?” You said.
“Goldie, I don’t think you could break the desk if you tried,” he said, taking a sip of his drink. You did the same, humming a little in appreciation. You rolled the liquid on your tongue like you would a wine, the bubbles crackling and dancing there before you swallowed it.
“God, that’s good,” you said. “I can’t remember the last time I had a soda that wasn’t diet…”
“Christ you sound like a Yankee,” Joel laughed, sitting back in the chair. “That’s a Coke in your hand, darlin’, not a fuckin’ soda.”
“Oh God,” you groaned and laughed, too. “That was such a hard habit to break! I’d ask my roommate if we had any Cokes, she said no, I’d go in the fridge later and see Diet Pepsi and have a what the fuck moment.”
“Strange world out there,” Joel smiled slightly, turning the glass bottle that looked so small in his large hands.
“Are these the tamales?” You asked, nodding at the plate.
“Oh, shit, yeah,” he said, taking the foil off the plate. The corn husks glistened and you groaned a little. Joel pulled two sets of plastic wrapped silverware out of his pocket and handed you one. “How long’s it been since you had one of these?”
“I don’t even want to own up to it,” you said, unwrapping the fork and knife. “I’ve basically been on a diet for the last decade of my life, these look incredible.”
You wheeled your office chair around the desk and sat next to Joel before peeling back a husk and cutting the end off with your fork and taking a bite. Your eyes rolled back in your head and you slumped back in the chair with a satisfied moan.
“Jesus Christ.”
“That good, huh?” Joel laughed.You just nodded, mouth full, and sat up to cut off another bite before you even swallowed the first one. “Diet for 10 years?”
“Yeah,” you nodded, covering your mouth with your hand until you could swallow. “There was the book tour, they wanted me to look a certain way. And… well, my husband has a type so…”
“Fuck that guy,” Joel said, opening another tamale and taking a bite of it. You rolled your eyes a little. “Mean it, fuck that and fuck him.”
“Oh, so you don’t have a type?” You asked, brows raised. “Because I seem to remember a very distinctive type in high school…”
“Oh lord,” he rolled his eyes.
“Pretty, for sure,” you said, teasing a little. “You definitely seemed to be a bit of a boobs man…”
“If I were with someone I sure as shit wouldn’t make them fucking diet to be my type,” he cut you off. “He’s a fucking idiot, Goldie.”
“You’re making a bigger deal out of this than it really is,” you waved him off.
“No, I’m really not,” he replied. “If we’d been talkin’ I’d have fuckin’ come to Rhode Island and kicked his sorry ass.”
“Joel,” you rolled your eyes.
“What?” He asked. “I would’ve. And he’d fuckin’ deserve it.”
“Anyway,” you said, cutting off another chunk of tamale. “You’ve got a new job starting tomorrow?”
“Yeah,” he nodded. “It’s one that I’m actually lookin’ forward to, too. Get to be a little more creative…”
“You don’t normally get to be creative?” You frowned.
He scoffed.
“Not on any of the big shit,” he said. “Owners and managers get to do that. They toss me the smaller projects here and there to plan and run, this one is some owner’s suite remodel. Doin’ the bathroom, fancy fucking closet, that kind of shit. They’re letting me run it so I’ll shut up about never getting to do the fun stuff.”
“How long have you been working there?” You asked.
“Since I was 20,” he said. “So… fuck, 13 years? Jesus, I’m getting old…”
“And they’re not letting you do the creative stuff?” You asked, brows raised.
“I’m apparently ‘too valuable’ runnin’ the crew,” he used air quotes. “They throw a few of these little jobs to me every year but mostly I just make sure shit goes right on site for bigger jobs. Get it all done on time, all that.”
“Do you like doing that?” You asked.
“Not really.”
“OK,” you frowned. “So why are you still there?”
“Well, mostly because I tried paying my mortgage once with dreams and they told me to fuck off,” he said dryly and you glared at him.
“You know what I mean,” you said, cutting off a chunk of his tamale.
“Hey!”
“Shove it,” you popped it in your mouth before he could take it back. He rolled his eyes. “You’ve been doing that work for a while is what I mean, I’m sure somewhere else would hire you and you could do the parts of it you liked.”
“What I really want is to start my own company,” he said. “Well, what I really want is to play music but that ship’s sailed. Realistically, I’d like to start my own company. I think I could make some really cool shit if I had the chance.”
“So do it,” you shrugged.
“Oh yeah, easy for you to say,” he scoffed. “What, you just write your fuckin’ book?”
“No,” you said. “It took a lot of work and editing and rewriting and I’m not sure I’ll ever do it again but I did it. You can do it.”
“What do you mean you’re not sure you’ll ever do it again?” He frowned. “Thought I saw somethin’ about you writing another one.”
You looked at him for a moment, frowning a little, fork frozen over the plate. You were contracted for another book but that wasn’t something that had made national news, just an item in some industry publications after the press release from the publisher.
Why would Joel know that?
“What?” He asked. “Why are you starin’ at me?”
“Oh,” you said. “Just got something on your face…” You dipped your fork into some of the drippings on the plate before smearing it on Joel’s cheek. “Just there, nothing crazy.”
He pursed his lips and looked like he was struggling not to laugh.
“You’re the worst person I know,” he said, wiping his face with a tissue from the box on your desk.
You smirked, sitting back in your chair and putting your legging-clad legs in his lap, the way you used to sit with him on the couch back when you were teenagers.
“I know.”
“I’m serious though,” he said, the hand not holding the fork going around your calf just like it always had. “What do you mean you might never do it again?”
“I don’t know,” you sighed, peeling the husk off another tamale and cutting off a bite of it. “I don’t know that I have another story to tell. I’ve been trying to tell another one and I just… haven’t found one. I think I had one good story in me and I told it. That’s the end.”
“That’s bullshit,” Joel said.
“It’s really not,” you shrugged. “When I wrote the first one it just kind of flowed. At least the first draft did. I wrote it in about six months after my mom died and Gale…”
“Brad.”
You glared at him.
“Gale,” you repeated. “Edited it and workshopped it with me.”
“Oh I’m sure he was a fuckin’ natural at that,” Joel said, voice dripping in sarcasm. You glared at him. “What, you’re telling me I’m wrong? I don’t think I am…”
“He was well equipped for the job,” you allowed. “And yeah, it took a lot of edits and rewrites before it was ready to even start trying to show to agents, it was years of work… Who would I do that with now? I don’t know that I can do it by myself…”
“Do it with your publisher and shit,” Joel said. “Come on, don’t tell me that jackass is what’s holding you back…”
“It’s not just that. I really don’t know that I have anything else to say. And even if I did…” you took a deep breath. You’d never said this aloud, not even to your agent. “If I did, what if it’s not as good?”
Joel waved you off.
“Of course it’d be as good, the fuck are you talking about?”
“I’m talking about the fact that everyone freaked the fuck out about the fact that my ‘debut novel,’” you put the words in air quotes, “was so brilliant and shit, what if I never write anything better? What if everything I ever make after this is a let down? What if I never do anything good again? Everyone who took a risk on me, everyone who read my first book, everyone who ever thought I could do something will be let down by it. Jesus, one reviewer said it was the best debut novel since To Kill a Mockingbird, how the fuck am I supposed to live up to that? Starting to understand why Harper Lee didn’t publish anything else for decades…”
“Goldie,” Joel said gently. “I’m sure you’d write something great.”
You poked at your tamale, staring at it as you did.
“What if the only great thing I ever made was great because of him?” You asked quietly, eyes darting to Joel for a second before looking back at the plate. “What if it was just fine when it came from me and it only became what it became because of him?”
“Anything you’d write would be great, got nothing to do with fuckin’ Brad,” he said. “Not sure you can write something that’s not great.”
You rolled your eyes.
“Joel, you read the articles I wrote for the school paper,” you said. “I don’t think you’re a fair judge.”
“And your lit mag stuff,” he said defensively. “Look, I’m not a genius or anything but I’m smart enough to know when something’s great and you’re great, alright?”
“Yeah, well…” you nudged his leg with your knee. “So are you.”
He just looked at you for a moment until you frowned.
“What?”
He leaned forward with his fork, smearing some tamale drippings on the tip of your nose.
“Got something right… there.”
You laughed and he squeezed your calf and you cleaned your face before you went back to focusing on the food and life outside of your broader ambitions. Before what felt like too long there was a knock on your door and Alyssa poked her head in.
“Sorry, didn’t realize you had company,” she smiled, her eyes drifting to where your legs were still in Joel’s lap. “I was just going to put a note on your desk, I figured you’d be at your next class already. Have you written your midterm yet?”
“Not yet,” you said, looking at your watch and you realized it was far later than you realized and you had less than 10 minutes to walk to your next class. “Shit, I have to go!”
Joel released your leg from his hold and you scrambled to collect your things as Joel cleaned up the remains of lunch.
“If you wanted to write midterms together,” Alyssa said as you slung your bag over your shoulder. “Maybe next week?”
“Sure,” you said, looking around at your desk and grabbing your gold notebook before standing next to Joel. “Email me?”
“Yup,” she smiled, looking Joel up and down. “Absolutely will. Hi.”
“Hi,” he said, smiling a little. You looked between them and fought the urge to groan. She was just Joel’s type.
“Alright, some of us have to go teach,” you said. “Out of my office so I can lock up.”
You ushered them both into the hall.
“Have fun teaching,” Alyssa waved, giving Joel a last look before heading to her office a few doors down from yours.
“Oh I’m sure I will,” you said, taking Joel’s hand and pulling him along behind you before he could start gawking at her and then you were really late for school. “See you later…”
“What was that about?” Joel laughed as you spilled out into the hall that was tight with the press of students.
“I know your type,” you said. “And I don’t have time to wait for you to be done doing your thing…”
“My ‘thing?’ And you know my type?” He asked, brows raised. “Really? Well, in that case…”
“Oh shut up,” you rolled your eyes and he laughed.
“I came by to see you, for the record,” he said. “And apparently feed you properly since you aren’t gonna do it yourself…”
“Thank you,” you said, sincerely. “That was really good. And it was really nice, hanging out with you.”
“It was good to hang out with you, too,” he said, smiling a little, his hands shoved in his pockets. “Should let you get to class though. Those minds aren’t gonna shape themselves. And I have your actual number now, not the fuckin’ hieroglyphics you tried to leave me Friday…”
“And I have yours,” you smiled back. “But I do have to go…”
“Right,” he said, leaning in and pulling you into a hug and holding you close for a second. He was warm and his chest was firm and there was something about the way his arms fit around you that was so all encompassing you were certain that you belonged there with him. That, somewhere in the universe, the root of you both had grown together and separated just to find each other again. He pulled back. “Don’t let those college kids give you too much trouble.”
“I won’t,” you said. “Don’t let Sarah give you shit.”
“Oh, I will,” he said. “Can’t help it. Bye, Goldie.”
You smiled.
“Bye, Joel.”
You were three minutes late to class. You didn’t care.
When you got home, you went to one of the boxes you hadn’t unpacked yet, one that sat in the extra bedroom that you hadn’t found a use for yet. You knew exactly which box, the one filled with things you only looked at when you were feeling especially strong or particularly weak. You sifted through old notebooks, past one of Joel’s faded band t-shirts that you’d swiped at his house when Tommy had knocked a cup of Kool-aid over when you were wearing a white shirt and Mrs. Miller and scrambled to get your top in the wash to get the stain out and then you’d never given it back, down to the shoebox of photos. You pulled it out and looked through them. Joel at 16, a confused look on his face as he lay on the wheeled contraption he used for sliding easily under his truck and you surprised him with camera, a splotch of grease on his cheek. You, 17, in Joel’s letterman that was big on him so it was massive on you, sleeves shoved up around your forearms as you stuck your tongue out at the camera. The two of you, 16, sitting on opposite sides of a restaurant booth, your legs stretched out on the benches, a basket of fries and a milkshake between you. You were flashing a peace sign at the camera and Joel was looking at you, a soft smile on his face.
It was easy to remember what friendship with Joel had been. It would be so easy to fall back into it. It felt like you were always supposed to be this way, lives so intertwined they were built on the same foundation. It had seemed an impossible thing, to blow it all apart. You’d loved it then. You missed it now. But it had blown apart and you weren’t sure you could survive losing it again.
You sighed, flipping to the back of the box to the photos from prom night. Your mom had sent them to you after you’d moved to Rhode Island and they’d languished at the photo lab for weeks. There was a simple note: “Thought you might want these,” a little heart drawn at the end.
You found the picture of the two of you together, your hand on his chest, his arm around your waist. You were looking up into his eyes and he was looking into yours, a small smile on his face, just enough for the beginnings of his dimple to show. You looked at it for a while before you signed, packing everything else away and moving to your office, propping the photo against your computer as you sat down to write.
***
Sarah had been in rare form that night. Very skeptical about why she needed to do homework at all and trying to logic her way out of needing to do it for as long as she possibly could.
“Kiddo, if you just sat down and did it, you’d be done by now,” Joel had groaned at one point.
“But if I just didn’t do it, I’d be done by now, too,” she replied.
He took a deep breath. Sometimes, this girl…
“Not on the table, Baby Girl,” he said. “You can either do your homework now and have time to watch TV before bed or you can not do your homework and fight me on it, not watch TV and get up early tomorrow to finish your homework. Up to you.”
She groaned, picking up her pencil, bouncing her leg impatiently under the dinner table. Joel wasn’t sure who was happier when the damn worksheets were done, him or his daughter.
Once Joel was certain Sarah was asleep, he went to the back of his closet and found the box that he kept stashed away. He didn’t have to look far, the two copies of your book right on top. One was signed. He didn’t open that one, just looked at it now and then, held it when he wanted to touch something you’d touched once.
The other had a worn spot on the spine, where the structure of the book had cracked and bent enough times because he’d tried to read it dozens of times but could never bring himself to go past the first page.
He liked the cover of it, certain that you’d had a hand in picking it. It was simple, an orange sun with a gilded flower in front of it, the title, Halcyon, in bold letters below the abstract image. Joel flipped past the pages of praise, the title page, the table of contents, the forward written by fucking Brad. He turned until he got to the words that were yours. He knew they were yours, he recognized the voice of you, even on paper. No matter what you said, there wasn’t an ounce of Brad there. At least, not on that page.
“The sun in Texas was hot in summer,” you’d written, “melting ice cream and asphalt in equal measure. But it was the heat of his palm that made my cheeks burn…”
He closed the book, looking at the back cover with your picture on it. Your arms were folded so that one was in front of you, the other vertical alongside your face. Your gaze was intense, a knowing smile on your lips, as though you were staring at him, teasing him, tempting him. “The answers are all here, Joel,” your picture said. “If you could just make yourself read it, you’d know.”
He put the book down and got his phone out of his pocket, finding your number in his contacts.
You answered on the second ring.
“Oh my God, you’re so demanding,” you sighed in faux exasperation.
Joel laughed.
“I know, I’m so fucking needy, don’t know how you stand me.”
You laughed back.
“What’s up?”
“Been thinking,” he began.
“You?” You said. “Really?”
“Shut up.”
You giggled.
“Anyway,” he continued. “Feel free to tell me to kick rocks but… Sounds like neither of our lives have exactly gone the way we’ve wanted them to.”
“You mean you didn’t plan on being a single dad and I didn’t plan on being divorced at 32?” You gasped. “Color me shocked!”
“We were always good at holding each other accountable,” he said, ignoring you. “Hell, you’re the only reason I graduated high school…”
“And you’re the only reason I started at the school paper,” you said. Joel smiled at that, the memory of standing outside the newspaper office while you talked to the teacher so you couldn’t back out.
“Right,” he said. “Well… what if we did that now?”
“Now?” He could hear you frowning through the phone. “What do you mean?”
“I mean,” he said. “Why don’t we try to actually get our shit together? You make me better, always have…”
“You, too,” you said quietly but you at least sounded serious now.
“When are you supposed to have your next book done?” He asked. “Assuming there’s a contract with a deadline for that shit, right?”
“End of next year,” you sighed.
“Great,” Joel said. “Alright, let’s give ourselves to the end of next year to set ourselves straight. You finish your book, whatever else you want to get done…”
“Finalize my divorce,” you said.
“That’s a good one,” Joel said. “I’ll see about starting my own business…”
“And having a stable relationship?” You asked.
“Sounds like a good goal,” he answered, his stomach twisting a bit at that. “What do you say? We come up with a list of shit and go from there? You know we’re better when we’re on a team than when we’re not.”
You were quiet for a moment.
“Yeah,” you said eventually. “Yeah, let’s do it.”
Joel smiled a little, looking down at the box, the cover of your book looking back at him.
“It’s a deal,” he said. “We’ve got this, Goldie.”
You laughed a little.
“Hell yeah we do.”
Next Chapter
A/N: So sorry for the long wait on this! Should be weekly updates from here out for a while, promise <3
Thank you thank you thank you for reading! I'm so excited for what's coming up for these two, I just love how they love each other and yes. I can't wait to explore it all with you.
Thank you for being here! Love you!
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