#fuck man I’m just tired
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Fuck I hope tomorrow is better than today’s been
#partly why I opened commissions now#just#feeling like a drain#and a bit of a failure#and a do nothing#cause I think I kinda am rn#not as much as I actually was last year#but I still am so I gotta pitch in what I can#and I can’t go job hunting because I know I won’t have enough energy for work and school#probly gonna just sell some of my shit that I don’t use#should probably look for who’s willing to buy it first#and election stress#and global health stress#fuck man I’m just tired#vent post#vent
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happy Friday everyone
#pizza tower#fake peppino#y’all…this is so stupid#“Hey I thought you were doing pizzatober?” Listen. Shut up.#man idk I’m so tired#october is midterm month and lemme just say: i’m an academic victim#the american education system is jumping me fr fr#additional context: IT'S FUCKING THURSDAY#I'M ACTUALLY LOSING IT OH MY GOD#scribbleshot
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buffy knows spike loves her during season five. buffy knows spike loves her when she comes back and seeks comfort/silence in his presence. and as she comes back to herself and tries to make peace with the fact that she’s Here Again, she still knows he loves her. and i think part of the Big Bad Grabbing The Slayer For The Darkness routine they both cling to is that it allows them to pretend this huge thing isn’t between them so they can get what they both want (someone to stay).
and like obviously buffy cannot allow herself to believe that he loves her for many reasons, but she DOES believe it, she can’t make herself unknow it even though she tries so hard. which is partially where the breakdown with tara in 6.13 comes from because the cognitive dissonance of soulless spike loving her as if he has a soul while she is so lost within herself that the only way she can reach for him is to use him (which would be fine if he was the big bad grabbing the slayer for the darkness) which is hurting him! unfathomably! but he’s supposed to be the corruption! how can he??? any of it???
meanwhile spike has watched the woman he loves be brought back as a shell and he wants to see the light in her eyes and he can touch her now and sometimes that’s enough to make her laugh but he can’t linger in those moments or she’ll go away again! so he can play the role he needs to play so she’ll stay, as if he could keep her anywhere she didn’t want to be. as if he wants her to be in the dark instead of bringing him into the light. but how could he ask for anything more when he already got her back and he didn’t even need to kill her afterwards.
and so they hurt each other and he forgets himself and asks her if she even likes him and it’s too honest and he’s asking too much (he asks for nothing) so before she can throw her life away like it’s nothing, he puts the game face on, makes himself a target, and swallows it all. and she can’t unknow. and it would all be fine except he’s a vampire and she’s the slayer and how can he just say it like it’s nothing when she needs to beat his face in just to keep from screaming.
#there’s so much with the scoobies and dawn having expectations of her that she constantly disappoints#because at least she then has something she thinks she must strive for she has clear lines to fill out#even if she knows she won’t do it successfully#spike takes her as she is and wants to love her as she is and wants her to love herself as she is#and that is unacceptable because there’s too much freedom in that and she’s so tired and so hungry and she thinks she came back wrong#if he can love her (a monster) then he must also be a monster#because if he loves her like a man loves a woman then this is It and she has to figure out how to live with#her own actions and the way she feels#it’s sooooooooooo tragic#like he looks at her and sees the sun and doesn’t want her in the dark!!!! but she’s so cold!!!!!!!!! she doesn’t want to hear that she can#still generate her own heat she just wants to feel the fire#and he can play.#he can pretend.#because he thought he was going to live forever without her.#sorry that episode is just literally fucking crazy buffy summers i love you#btvs#this is not a good post i’m not saying anything. 6.13 is just a crazy episode
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This is eating me up inside, I genuinely want to know why is Steve so okay with putting himself down and everyone just thinks it’s fine? Like no one questions why he thinks so lowly of himself even though he’s done a lot to prove that he’s more than what the show let on. I think it’s weird how in a conversation he’ll slip in comments about himself that are negative. I also think it’s so gross that he can’t have a moment of confusion without being disrespected and I know it’s supposed to be funny but at a certain point someone should really ask “is Steve okay?” I can bet money that the answer won’t be yes.
I also want to add how come Eddie (someone who doesn’t even know Steve from a can of paint other than school) find something nice to say about him and not put him down. This also adds to my list why I think steddie is real but that’s for another time
#steve Harrington#leave him the fuck alone#I’m sick of it#yes i’m ranting#this is a rant#he deserves everything#he deserves the world#he just like me fr#oop#this hits home#i’m so upset#i’m sorry for this#i’m a mess#i’m sleepy#I’m tired#idk what this is#man idk#i’m just venting#stranger things#manifesting#power#please#come on#idk what else to tag#help lol#welp#that’s all#that’s it#steddie#Eddie munson
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my gojos
and my one geto
#i lost geto’s files 😭#but i mean on the bright side these are all one artstyle#jjk#geto#gojo#sorry for not being as active i’ve had a horrible week and i’m just so fucking exhausted so here’s some old art :’)#fuck capitalism btw#and fuck patronizing coworkers#shit week man yea i’m using my tags to rant but like pls ignore this i just need to type it out#tired
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I’m genuinely so fucking sick of the “you all would have loved it if it was Eddie who made that comment” take.
First of all, Eddie wouldn’t have made comment then, bc he knows how hard it is for Buck to talk about his emotions, & is REALLY good at giving him the space to talk about them, even if he does make jokes, they’re not out of pocket (the coming out scene, anyone? Breaking the tension with a joke & still being supportive without making a joke of his feelings.)
Secondly, even if Eddie DID make that comment, I’d probably still roll my eyes, but I’d be more willing to accept it. Do you wanna know why???
Who was the person that knew the details of what Buck was talking to his therapist about during their emergency session before the Buckley’s visit? Who is the first one they show at Buck’s side when he gets stuck in the warehouse trying to pull Saleh out after learning about Daniel?? Who is the one who was pacing downstairs in the station & making sure Buck was okay after the warehouse, and the one who warned him about his visitors??
Who was the one praying at Bobby’s bedside, right next to Buck in the hospital?
(I’ll give you a hint, it’s not the dude that’s had 10 minutes of fucking screen time that everyone forgot about post s1.)
It wouldn’t have been the same bc TOMMY AND EDDIE ARE NOT THE SAME. They are not on the same level of knowing Buck & understanding when to make jokes & what jokes to make. Your best friend, partner & co-parent of 6 years and the man that you haven’t even called your boyfriend yet are not on the same level of familiarity.
I get that you’re pissed that Tommy is being compared to Buck’s previous love interests (which would be the case, even if he wasn’t just as shitty & uninterested in Buck as a person as they all were) but if you genuinely think that he’s anywhere near Eddie’s level, EVEN PLATONICALLY, then I fear that you have been watching another show entirely, & I encourage you to watch more than just s7, bc that’s the only explanation I can come up with for why this fuck ass take exists.
#911 abc#buddie#this isn’t really about the buddie relationship but I think it’s still relevant#I’m so tempted to tag BT bc I think the ones saying this have lost the entire plot of the fucking show#but I’ve also only had like 8 hours of sleep in 2 days#& have almost had 3 panic attacks since Wednesday so I know I’d probably regret it#911 discourse#hating on a storyline/joke/character ≠ hating on a bunch of fans bc they don’t enjoy the same things that you do#eddie diaz#evan buckley#ryan guzman#oliver stark#this could have been a sweet moment to show Tommy taking care of Buck#but instead he made yet ANOTHER shitty & ill timed joke#Eddie has been right beside Buck through his entire journey with his parents#that gives him the right to joke about it#a man who Buck’s been on 3-4 dates with & hasn’t put any effort into their relationship since he planned the date#that he subsequently walked out in the middle of#does not have the same right#this is genuinely not a difficult concept??#like. think about your bff & then think about a new love interest. would you really be comfortable with those 2 people making the same joke#or would you laugh at your best friend’s & be a little off-put by your new potential love intrest???#anti T*van#I heard that tagging something as anti still shows up on that tag & Im just too tired to fucking fight
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Here to remind all you fuckers who continue to “baby and woobize” Noah Schnapp that the man out right supports genocide.
Hes not your ‘pookie’, he’s completely okay with 4k+ children dying. Remember that as in the coming months as his team is in damage control and will be trying to shove Will Byers, Byler, and Stranger things down our throats as if that makes up for the things he’s said.
#honestly makes me not want to watch season 5#also most of the cast has been suspiciously quite#don’t think the people aren’t noticing#this isn’t only disgusting behavior but it’s just inhumane#will byers#stranger things#byler#wow totally sorry to interrupt your fandom flow in the tags#I’m just tired of yall babying this man#noah schnapp#send me hate I fucking dare you
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Me watching mha/bnha like “ew whos this old man on my screen, someone make him shut up and go back to tomura.” I’m so tired of this old wrinkly ass man and his “im so smart” bland villain ass. The story concept of tomura being taken over by AFO is so annoying to me, give me back my fav and stfu you egg head. It’s like william afton and vanny from fnaf all over again. You got your course. Now go. “I always come back.” No. Mf. Fucking stay dead already. You and AFO. LITERALLY NO ONE ASKED. EVERYONES TIRED OF UR BS AND “I WAS ACTUALLY THE VILLAIN ALL ALONG.” LEAVE.
#i hate afo so much#hes just so ew#give me lov and tomura#not some bland ass ‘im so smart’ villain no personality#the lov is character the lov is love and passion#THEY HAVE EXISTENCE IN THEM#also dont even get me started on vanny#fnaf security breach did HER SO FUCKING DIRTY#i’m tired of this grandpa#leave william afton#UGH#rant over#maybe#anyways tags#mha#bnha#my hero academia#boku no hero academia#tomura shigiraki#tomura shigaraki#shigaraki tomura#afo#i hate this man sm#also#fnaf#william afton#vanny#fuck u vanny had so much potential and they just threw it away#rant was not over it seems
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feeling very grateful for the cute barista today who clearly clocked a) my fontaines d.c. tote, and b) the fact i was stuck on a spectacularly bad date, and proceeded to play me an entire playlist of fontaines d.c. and sneak me extra vegan marshmallows with my hot chocolate
#an absolute GEM 💗#we need more people in the world like this#they restored my faith in humanity 🙏#unlike my date#who was… well. i’ve been on worse ones i guess#but he monologued at me for a two and a half hours#and on the rare times i actually managed to get a word in edge ways or voice an opinion#he just twisted it round to suit what he’d been saying#it REALLY annoyed me#the entire thing annoyed me actually#i am so sick and tired of going on dates with straight white men who feel the need to explain everything to you#as if you’re not a person with a mind and experiences of your own#also wtf is the point on going on a date with someone when you aren’t remotely interested in getting to know them???#the man asked me maybe two questions total the entire afternoon#i could write his entire fucking biography#also at the end he said how cool and mysterious i was#and i’m like ????#i’m only mysterious because you’d prefer me to be that than an actual person who you could have had a proper conversation with#*breathes out slowly*#phew okay i was angrier about this than i thought lol#the older i get the less tolerance i have for shit like this 🫠#anyway yeah sorry#vent over 😅#i’m just so annoyed because i have SUCH limited energy atm with my pain and fatigue etc and i just wasted it on him ffs#but then again#the cute barista and the fontaines d.c. and the marshmallows were most definitely not a waste of my energy#they totally saved my day honestly 🙏#fontaines d.c.#lulu posts
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strange behaviour from the arcane fandom when a woman that has relations with another woman goes down a darker path and people condemn her whereas if she was a man in love with another man this would be lapppped up as “toxic yaoi”. please get a grip
#i’m tired#i’m so tired#people will do anything to erase lesbians from media#not even just when i think about the treatment of mel from a vast majority of jayce / viktor shippers … weird fucking behaviour#if cait was a man and vi remained a woman nobody would bat an eye#if they were both men nobody would bat an eye#her whole arc is reference to how privileged people will fall to facism at the smallest drop of suffering#that the lower classes experience like. what are you not fucking getting#i’m trying to think of examples here but people looooove kylo ren and he takes on a sort of dictator’s role#though not in a similar fashion#it’s just tiring to read all of the time#nobody can stand nuanced female characters but everyone sits and laps up similarly or WORSE toxic male characters#get a fucking grip#tbd.#also the mel issue is separate it’s just on the brain#because apparently two men cannot have a close bond without wanting to fuck and devour each other :/#but women are always written as besties. ok#i’m#also not saying don’t ship jayvik. but you see the issue here right#a canonical lesbian relationship is thrown to be shredded#and jayvik takes favour yet again ??? MEL IS RIGHT THERE TOO ….. not that it’s any betterrrr#but you see. you get my point ???? THE CANON IS THERE. ACKNOWLEDGE ITTTTTTR
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leo leaving foolish a sign like all the others, leaving the most concrete out of all the messages, but no one comments on it. foolish, dead quiet after asking for a direct translation, as the others come in, take note of the sign, and then continue on to other topics. forever coming up, asking if this is anything new or “just another sign”. baghera and fit, the only ones asking if he’s okay, and he just brushes it off, because of course he would, it’s foolish, and it’s easy even though it’s entirely unconvincing and obviously a lie, because everyone else is talking over them anyway. etoiles not even checking in, just pulling him aside to accuse him of federation bullshit. everyone proceeding to talk about crimes in his tower, sitting right on the concrete trail. mouse in the cappy place, saying foolish doesn’t even care about leo, he doesn’t care that she’s gone, and foolish goes quiet for a full minute, until he can find some joke to latch onto and start deflecting again. I can’t take it anymore I’m at my limit.
did anyone other than foolish know the significance of the amethyst, and take note, like they did with the other eggs and their left behind items? or was it just him, alone later on, repeating always juntos to himself as he looks at the message again.
#jmgoing to be sick#everyone else gets condolences gets oh this is significant. he gets ‘just another sign’. just another sign just another sign just another s#does anyone else know what’s important to Leo? everyone else is like oh their beloved items I’m so sorry w Tallulah chayanne and Ramon but#with foolish and leo. god. foolish who is so severely misunderstood on the server. leo who was always so afraid she would just be brushed#aside not making friends. the odd egg out. what the fuck man#and Roier too. throw in the whole family. what’s up with this man I’m sick I’m tired#foolish going quiet when he’s upset. when he’s emotional. and everyone taking it as he doesn’t care. like what is this man#or nervous laughter before silence. like you’ve known him long enough to know it’s not because he’s actually amused!!! god!!!!!!!!!!!!#I’m just upset ok I’m upset I’m upset I’m upset#‘just another sign’ fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you#qsmp#mcyt#foolish gamers#q!foolish#q!leonarda#z speaks
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I identify as a mess who desperately wants to come across in a masc way, but is reactive and emotional and has too many diagnoses to know what the hell is going on.
I walk like I’m in pain and I probably am but who knows anymore.
I care about everyone and the world far more than I should. I try to help and more often than not end up in trouble cause I said what needed to be said and won’t back down if there’s an injustice.
I’m stubborn, I fail at self-care.
I hurt, I get blamed, and I can’t advocate for myself anymore. I exhausted myself fighting.
I cope by being a bratty masochist, embracing the pain, embracing thoughts I shouldn’t have, but ultimately relinquishing control —albeit after a fight, stubborn and ‘unwilling’— to someone who cares more than I do about my preservation and permanence. Each hit, each kick, each pull against the restraints —I want it to mean something.
In the line of fire, I’d rather step in front of someone than step on top of someone.
I ask too many questions. People before profits.
I dissociate, am too serious, get lost in thought with furrowed brow.
I yearn to give into the self-destructive thoughts. I love the thrill but fear the fall. I wish I could stop being afraid.
Sleep is not restful.
So, when a symbiote offers to merge, to heal, to care, to keep you on your toes, to hold and heal and take control for a moment?
Yes. I may fight and I may struggle, and it may not always be perfect, but I would give up my autonomy when needed. And that, perhaps, is why there was no acute rejection. A perfect match. A perfect host.
Do pathetic, masc, masochistic people like Eddie actually exist?
Well, I’m less cool, but might fill a gap in the market.
I’ve found the closest being possible to Venom, and I’m so grateful to them. But do real life Anne and Dan’s exist?
Sometimes I just want to be walked through a hospital corridor, confused and vulnerable, and be guided by someone who cares —not as a statistic or just as a professional, but as a… whatever Dan is to Eddie.
Please?
This is embarrassing and badly written.
Please ignore me, I’m tired.
#idk man#symbrock#eddie brock#venom#eddie brock whump#eddie brock is a sub#i’m so tired#just rambling#if anyone cares#im sorry#there’s something wrong with me#i need sleep#fml man#polyamory#im sad and tired#im so fucking tired#brat taming#cnc brat#bd/sm brat#projecting
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Do you guys think Nesta and Cassian listen to classical music while having sex?
#cassian#nesta archeron#nessian#pro nessian#acosf#nessian supremacy#soft nessian#nessian smut#idk man i’m tired#it’s 11pm and i have school tomorrow#and i can’t sleep#i love classical music#it’s like metal without electricity#there is no point to this post#im just really fucking tired
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Hey.
Kim teaching Harry how to skateboard and Harry teaching Kim how to roller skate.
Harry thinks he fucking sucks at first because Kim gets the hang of roller skating pretty quickly. As it turns out, skateboarding is a lot harder than roller skating.
I don’t know where I’m going with this. Um. Kim still prefers skateboarding because of the technical aspect and risk factor but he’s surprised he enjoys how chill roller skating is.
Harry enjoys skateboarding because a) time with Kim as a teacher and b) oh wow a challenge? Your physical instrument loves challenges. You will conquer this with the force of your—what do you mean this is more the centipede’s thing? Holy shit no wonder Kim’s so cool
#disco elysium#harry du bois#kim kitsuragi#anyway I got a cheap Walmart skateboard yesterday and I’m a little bit taken in right now#practiced just getting on the board and pushing forward for like 30 minutes and ended up sweating#confused at first before I remembered…#you know how you get super fucking tired after a long day of travel in the car or on the train and stuff#it’s because your body is always making micro adjustments to keep you in place#and skateboarding? it’s all about body control baby#skateboarding is hard man#be cool to have a custom made Dolores dei skateboard though imo
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not every character who does something wrong needs a redemption arc. btw.
#storyrambles#random#I am so tired of the words ‘redemption arc’. people arguing every character needs redemption before they can do good#like they’re sinners who need the saving grace and forgiveness of god#I’m tired man#people fuck up and keep living their lives and sometimes there’s no ‘redemption’ there’s just changing things in your life and#trying not to do that again#random thoughts
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Everyone can stay hating on the qunari cc . I WILL be making a hot qunari lady w a fivehead and she will be so beautiful to me, and more importantly beautiful to Davrin / Emmrich
#I’m actually tired of the negativity and the drama#cause I’m just determined to love this game#nothing that has been revealed has been devastating or ruined the hype#so! here’s a positive shoutout to the future qunari characters#some ppl just have big foreheads man some of my best friends have huge domes okay. and they’re hot as fuck!!!#dragon age#datv#dragon age the veilguard
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