#fuck if i know!!! paperwork!!!

[livwritesstuff]

When Robbie is in the tail end of her elementary school years, she starts going to a sleepaway camp. She’s around nine the first time she goes and she’s nervous at first, obviously, but she ends up loving it so much that by the end of the month-long program, Steve and Eddie practically have to drag her out of the cabin.

The next year, Robbie convinces them to let her attend the entire eight-week program, which means she’s gone practically the entire summer – a goddamn score, in their opinion, because it means they only have two kids to figure out what to do all summer with instead of three.

There is, however, an unexpected opponent of this – Moe.

Moe did not like not having Robbie around for two months, and she moped around the house practically the entire summer (Steve caught her standing in front of the calendar counting the days until her return at least twice). Rather than admit that she actually loves her sister and truly misses her when she’s gone though, she resorts to the only real solution to keep her at home – implicit manipulation tactics.

Which is why Steve overhears this exchange a few months before Robbie’s departure for her third year at camp:

Moe: I would never want to do something like that.

Moe: Like, you’re going into that gross lake every day and you can’t ever shower. You never change your sheets. There’s a million people all in one room.

Moe: It’s so gross.

Robbie, shrugging: I showered basically every day.

Robbie: And I changed my sheets once a week.

Moe: Whatever.

Moe: I don’t know why anybody would want to go to one of those.

Moe: There’s way better things to do here – you don’t even know, Robbie.

Later, Steve has to have this conversation with her:

Steve: I totally get that you really miss Robbie while she’s at camp.

Steve: And I know that two months is a long time for her to be gone.

Steve: But I gotta tell you, hon.

Steve: Manipulating her into thinking she doesn’t want to go…not the best way to go about dealing with that emotion.

[a-ikuoliver]

i literally cry sometimes at the idea of marrying my partner i am so excited about it but im also incredibly scared at trying to plan a same sex marriage

[bacchilles]

well. the adhd has won Again

[unwrathful]

chiara would bite the hand of anyone who tries to wake up @lixenn's chief

[chronurgy]

Experiencing the world's fucking weirdest work situation atm. Like genuinely what the fuck. I can't even really post about it because it's too identifying but know I am going through it™

[rxttenfish]

please understand. if you sit close to aaravi while shes deep in thought, you can hear her Clicky Clacky her mandibles. they might be useless but they ARE stimmy as hell.

[idontmindifuforgetme]

I think I realized how severely humor infects all spaces when I witnessed two of my coworkers at the neuro clinic I’m interning at laughing at putting in a patient as deceased

[i3utterflyeffect]

lol, stick paperwork might ask for shit like hex color codes, preferred encryption methods, website/program of origin. which doesn't apply at all to poor selkie alan and tsc, freaks of digital nature.

GOD. YEAH. poor guy is having a nightmare of a time

[dragons-and-yellow-roses]

Just had my first psychiatrist appointment in like two years! Not to brag, but I improved on mental illness so much that I was upgraded from Bipolar 2 to Bipolar 1! 😎

[djevelbl]

Ok. I now understand what that one person here was saying about doctors treating their patients with a clinical consideration (or lack thereof) that seems to be particular to the profession — or I now understand it more... personally, I guess. So I'm at the dentist (or whatever the specific type of doctor, idk about doctor pokemon types dude they're all the same to me) bc they had to put something on a badly decayed/fucked up tooth (hello bilingualism, how I loathe not knowing how to communicate properly) and she starts cleaning it bc of my, admittedly, bad dental habits

This is where the fucked up thing comes in: she notices that I'm tensing up and clenching the armrests on my grasp real tightly; I have this thing where if I'm grabbing onto an armrest and I'm scared/in pain/deeply uncomfortable I'll dig my index and middle fingers into it, the others circling around it — kinda like how you'd measure someone's pulse on their wrist, but I'm instead trying to strangle the shit out of an inanimate object. So she decides to inject some anesthesia on the general area so she can work better and I'm calmer — situation resolved!

Except, it doesn't work.

I've had problems with dental-related anesthesia in the past — I had to get my wisdom teeth removed and let me tell you, even if I didn't feel the pain that didn't mean I wasn't feeling it; I can only assume what I felt was discomfort, some sort of sensibility or something like that, but trust me, that operation was hell on Earth and I hated every second of it. Coming back to the present, I felt. Every. Fucking. Time her shooty mc watergun thing came anywhere close to my fucked up tooth — she had to clean around it? I felt it. She had to clean within it? Yep, I felt it. She moved the instrument around and it just so happen to soot water into the tooth? BOOM I was clenching the armrests like they owed me money. It was SO. BAD I started shaking at some point like I had hypothermia, it was HORRIBLE

The worse part was whenever she asked me if it hurt. The repeated chant of "it hurts? No? Of course not, I gave you anesthesia!" Will forever haunt me, in just the same way that doctor who took out my wisdom teeth does whenever I remember the pain and his question of "you can still feel it?" Whenever I said that I still felt pain from the needle entering my gums. I can still hear the befuddlement in his voice every time I shaked my head one way or another, clearly in a manner that did not align with The Good Patient Manual he'd been taught to learn. I don't think I'll ever forget her sort of upbeat voice as she cleaned my tooth and I was made to lay as still as the tremors allowed me to be, clenching the armrests and getting my head manhandled by my top front teeth with her finger — I didn't even think someone would ever do that.

Like. What the fuck

[gay-for-the-snz]

.

[duckapus]

Squid Memes Squidbeak Splatoon (part 2)

Part 1 Here

More Harbor because he gave me Brain Worms

Born and Raised in Littol Beeg Bluff (yes the same Littol Beeg Bluff from "The Ballad of Dusty Grumpton" in the Factory Reset AU. I'm allowed to re-use my own ideas if I damn well please)

Comes from a blended family, and his stepmom and younger siblings (twin boy and girl around eight) are actually Koopa Troopas of all things.

The only playable Agent to both know and like his parents

Seriously Habor's moms are fucking awesome. Everybody in the NSS loves Harbor's moms

About 80% Humboldt Squid (aka Jumbo Flying Squid), which is why he's so fucking tall. It also means that he's really fast in swim form, to the point that he could probably outswim someone who'd filled all the slots on a piece of gear with Swim Speed Up without any Swim Speed Up investment of his own. (this is inspired by Lucky, another, very different version of Agent 4 made by EikaPrime on Ao3)

Eight

Yes she just goes by Eight. She was a little self-conscious about it at first but then she found out about SMG4 and the other SM64 Blooper Youtubers and no longer gives a shit

If she remembers her old name yet she's not mentioned it

Obviously doesn't remember her parents, but given the Domes are the kind of place where you can Start Training to Become an Advanced Military Hardware Engineer and Elite Soldier at Fucking Nine Years Old, I imagine she wouldn't have many memories of them even without the Amnesia

Contrary to popular fanon, my version of Eight doesn't have a scar from the Test Failed Bomb. This is because Respawn Pads (as long as they're fully functional) completely erase whatever the fatal injury was, leaving no trace apart from maybe some phantom pains if it was particularly nasty

She does, however, have plenty of scars from all the other shit she went through in that hellhole

Managed to complete every single test before she escaped

My version of Eight is a single year younger than Marina canonically is when they meet so I'm not going the Off the Hook Adoption route for this one (maybe in another AU with a more lose interpretation of Canon, but given this AU is specifically meant to adhere to Splatoon Canon as much as possible we're out'a luck this time), though she does still become very close friends with them

She's got Craig literally right there for any potential adoption attempts anyway

Very rarely speaks, but is expressive enough that most people can tell what she means anyway (you know Ferb? It's the exact same thing as what Ferb does)

Doesn't have a weapon preference. She's comfortable with any weapon she gets her hands on

Except Splatanas

She fucking hates Splatanas and everything they stand for

Configuring Frye's Palette in the Memverse was legitimately harder than dealing with her own Palette's stupid "Hacks or Chips, you can't have both" Gimmick Bullshit

Andi Finn

Has no fucking idea who her parents were and does not care

Actual supergenius who could probably build a functioning replica of Grizz's rocket out of scrap metal from just her memory of fighting on top of it. Never learned how to read before the NSS got ahold of her because she lived alone in the desert

Swears more than Bob

Can't remember where she learned Salmonid from

Somehow even the homeless kid has better hygiene than Paige

Made up her last name on the spot when she was signing up for a Turfing License (if you're wondering how she managed to sign up for a Turfing License when she couldn't read; With Great Difficulty)

Figures she probably isn't a full Inkling given her weird beartrap beak but doesn't give enough of a shit to take a DNA test about it

Yet

Paige dragged her home to their apartment almost immediately after the final battle against Mr. Grizz and she never left. It's not an official adoption but that's only because Paige is a bit oblivious to their own feelings on the matter and Andi doesn't know that paperwork is supposed to be involved

Almost exclusively calls Paige "Cap" even when they're out of uniform. I mean, she can't very well call them "Mom" or "Dad" since they're nonbinary, now can she? Paige has no idea that's what she means by it and just thinks it's a nickname because Andi gives everybody nicknames. Usually as insults

It took her 333 tries to get through "Splitting Crosshairs" (I legitimately Cannot beat that stupid kettle no matter how hard I try and want her to share my frustration but also want all four agents to have 100%ed their respective adventures so I'm just having it take her a comically long time to do)

Mains Explosher because it's the closest she can get to a Turf-Legal grenade launcher (for now...)

The Eternal Hunger, Devourer of the Bear

Is fine with people using Crabcake instead

Uses It/Its exclusively

Officially designated Agent 5 I will die on that hill

Was "The Eternal Hunger, Stabber of Ankles" before going through Return of the Mammalians

Will stab anyone who points out that it didn't actually eat Mr. Gizz, he just exploded

Extremely eloquent, but most people can't speak Salmonid so it just sounds like it's making the same gurgley noises as every other Smallfry

Once looked Marie dead in the eyes and said "No one will ever believe you" in perfect Inklish while they were alone. Has never said anything else in anything other than Salmonid where someone can hear it

Andi and Crabcake fucking hated each-other for the first third of their adventure before bonding over kicking Frye's ass and now they're inseparable

Actually gets its own uniform after everything's said and done. It consists of a little high-rez safety vest (like the one on Paige's field uniform), an earpiece (suction-cupped in place since it doesn't have external ears) in the same style as Andi's headset, and a clean black-with-thin-yellow-racing-stripes-on-the-sides pants...wrap...thing

It also got a new switchblade from Sheldon (the old one got lost in the space battle after it turned into Hugefry) with the same kind of black-with-blue-LEDs aesthetic as Paige's gear and a blade made of Sardinium

Also thinks that it and Andi are already adopted by Paige but that's for Salmonid Culture Reasons instead of Not Having an Education Reasons

Got separated from its swarm during a Run a few months before Return of the Mammalians. It wasn't too fussed about it and figured it could handle itself in the desert for a while and then either reunite with that swarm if it ran into them or join a new one if it happened to come across one. Because Salmonid Culture

Considers the NSS its current swarm

[lucabyte]

OH THANK GOD PRE-RAYBANS-HACK ME TAGGED ALL MY HOMESTUCK POSTS <- SAVED FROM TRAULING MY 2011-2019 BLOG ARCHIVE

[rising-phnx]

had to miss class today because my body really, really hates me

[vvelegrin]

wishing my brain worked <3

[transhitman]

District manager is coming in to the store today and I swear if she says anything bad about how I'm running my department I'm gonna blow a fuse