#fuck I forgot the t but it’s too funny now to go back

[calebsrottingcorpse]

hits him with the pony ray (closeups below the cut)

[fics-lovebot]

satoru gojo fic rec

main masterlist

· · ♡ · · tysm to the amazing creative minds of the writers for giving me sevaral moments of joy reading your creations

i´ll be constantly updating this list so make sure to check it out often for new recs ;)))

pls remember to reblog if you like any of my recs❤️

disclaimer: if you came back looking for that one fire fic and you can´t find it, it´s bc it doesn't exist anymore :( so i deleted it

LAST UPDATED: 08/08/2024

gojo

gojo eating you out - ( @happybird16 )

gojo x dacryphilia - ( @happybird16 )

gojo loves fat pussy - ( @tohokuu )

sending gojo an accidental nude so he sends you a whole video - ( @satoruhour )

gojo tried to give himself a haircut and now wants to go bald - ( @enkvyu ) this is fuNNY ksksks, I love the banter

trying to break up with yandere!gojo - ( @peachsayshi ) yep, we´re talkin about lovesick toxic obsessed type of gojo, break up????? you know better than to tell him that sooo since you´re acting dUMB he has to fucc so sense into you bc, clearly, you forgot who tf ur talking to - LDKJSDFJDJFHLSHFLSHDF but he´s not rough bc he luvss you a lot

insecure bully!gojo - ( @saetoru ) angst, lil fluff, he´s a bully and he´s in love, but its not enough. part 2

the horniest - ( @arminsumi ) smut, ITS SO GOOOOOOOOOOOOODDDDDD, he´s horny af, pussy drunk, obsessed, borderline crazy for that wap

phone calls - ( @kingkonoha ) slice of life, hubby!gojo, dilf!gojo, his wife and his daughter are his only priority, this is so sdkfjskdjfh :´( i love it

best of the best - ( @saetoru ) smut, fwb! satoru, big sHIT talker omg, he lit asks you to be his gf wHILE he´s making you cum,,,,,best bf ever tho

love struck - ( @xxsabitoxx ) fluffy, ex-fuckboy!satoru, he´s experiencing love for the first time :((((( IT´S SO CUTEEEEEEEEEE

love dumb - ( @arminsumi ) fluff, blurb, you make him lose his composure, can´t even focus bc you´re over there existing, someone should make a longer version of this! so good

too much - ( @risuola ) ANGSTTTYYYY, fluff too, reader and gojo are in a situationship kinda thing where they live together and love each other but nothing has been said yet, they get into an argument bc gojo has a big mouth and says a lot of hurtful things, they´re both just so exhausted

i know you still think about the times we had - ( @saetoru ) angst, fluff, rich bf!gojo, his father makes you break up with him, it´s so angsty omg, they get into this HUGE argument bc gojo´s dad is a controlling mf

sanctuary - ( @arminsumi ) fluff, lowkey angst, weak!reader, bully!gojo, nah he´s just in love but doesn´t know how to say it

the road to falling in love - ( @itadorey ) fluff, strangers to lovers, it´s a collection o moments where keeps falling harder for you, I LOVE ITTTTT, sdkfjhskdjf it´s kinda slow burn but not boring at all

yuji finds out gojo has a family - ( @kingkonoha ) fluff, lowkey angst, hubby!gojo, dad!gojo, so,,, this made me cry, i love yuji sm he deserves the world :( this is part two and it also made me crY MY MF EYES OUT :))))))))

i´ll meet you forever in this memory - ( @gorejo ) fluff, college au, married life au, it´s so good, he lit has this big ass plan to make you fall for him, and i mean big, like planned way ahead lmao, 10 years later he´s still asking you to go out with him,,,,even if you´re already married sdlfkjkdfhlsdjh so so cute

can´t stop drinking - ( @kingkonoha ) ANGST, death, blood, dad!gojo, husband!gojo, mentions of wanting to die, a curse kills you and your son allegedly but in reality the elders had lied to him all these years, part 2 made me fucking cry, PLEASEEE I NEED PART 3

hype man - ( @satoruoo ) crack, fluff, supportive bf!gojo, he´s such an amazing bf :( “damn, my girl ran you over with a bus, reversed, then got out and shot you twice in the foot? what did you do?? sounds like a you issue.” LMAOOOOO this is so cute and funny at the same time, i love it, such a gojo thing to say

flicker of flame - ( @tteokdoroki ) fluff, nervous soon to be dad!gojo, pregnant!reader, he´s going to be the best dad ever

mirror´s pov - ( @teddybeartoji ) smut, "satoru likes jerking off in front of a mirror" YUP, a whole POV of him beating his meat to the thought of you BEAUTIFULLY written, very detailed

missionary - ( @babiexiao ) smut, fluff, THIS IS SO :(((( so beautiful

[vhaos-chaotic-writing]

Hello, Can I resquest, Transformers One, Yandere Sentinel Prime with a cybertronian reader conjux HCS

Oooh Sentinel Prime - lowkey, I believed I was gonna hate his guts until my very last breath. But I forgot I like fucked up characters that also have babygirl tratis (I mean - I am obsessed with Starscream, I understimated myself).（〃｀ 3′〃）

Yandere!Sentinel Prime (TFO) w/ Conjux Cybertronian!Reader (HCs)

WARNING: Yandere behaviour, possessive and obsessive elements, manipulation, psychological and emotional abuse, forced relationship.

Sentinel Prime is definitely a manipulative, possessive yandere that is not afraid to punish his Conjux with psychological or emotional punishment types.

You were older than both Orion Pax and D-16, a miner too - a hard working one who was always kind and tried to remain positive to everything, even when the guards were kind of jerks and your teammates got hurt while working.

Sentinel met you one day he went down to the mines to just say empty words and promises that fooled enough his blind admirers to keep up working hard. The moment his optics met yours among the other miners... he felt like his spark vibrated.

Uh, how strange - he was sure he was definitely disgusted by any bot, no matter if they were femme, mechs or none, that were a miner.

But here he is, thinking about you and talking Airachnid's audials off about you.

Maybe now he understood what Megatronus said about feeling his spark sing whenever Solus Prime was by his side.

Sentinel Prime started to look after you, visiting you down in the mines and trying to woo you. And while you were quite flattered... something in your spark knew something was wrong. You didn't knew exactly what it was wrong - but everything pointed at Sentinel, one way or another.

You tried to be polite and paint an imaginary limit line between you and the false Prime - but Sentinel knew what you were doing. And he wasn't gonna have it.

"Hehe... oh, sweetspark - it's so funny how you think you can just reject my advances! You should be grateful I have my optics on you, dear! But... Oh, well, I wished we had an organic 'fall-in-love' story to later tell our sparklings! But you left me with no options."

You were... confused. And scared. But before you could even step back, you felt a painful kick in the back of your helm, soon everything going dark.

When your optics onlined, you were met with a... new faceplate.

"Oh, thanks Primus! My love, are you okay?" The unknown mech asks as he gently craddles your faceplate with his servos.

"Where... where am I? What...?" You start to ask, blinking a few times before tilting your helm, staring with curiosity at the mech. "Who are you?"

The mech seems to smile a little bit more to then change his expression one to sadness. "Oh, my sweetspark - you don't remember me?"

The mech - Sentinel Prime - gently held your servo as both of you walked among the big, luxurious hallways of his home, explaining to you how you both were soon to be Conjuxes, him being a Prime and you were part of the guards. While on a mission against the Quintessons, you got hurt and your T-cog got taken, you nearly died! But your beloved soon to be Conjux saved you!

You just... accept it. I mean, you didn't remember anything (but something felt like missing inside of your system). But you didn't mind, you felt safe and loved in Sentinel's hold.

If Sentine Prime was not around because of needing to attend important Prime business, Airachnid is always with you - and she became a sort of... guardian. One who always followed you and kept Sentinel updated about you.

Sentinel blatantly manipulates you whenever you show any type of doubt or consideration on what he says or does. "My sweetspark, please... I nearly lost you one time. And I felt like my spark was going to die. I cannot lose you again, please. I love you so much."

It always works - after all, you don't know exactly who you were once are. Sentinel Prime is everything you have.

"Without me - you are nothing."

A few days after having woken up from your forced induced stasis mode, both of you became the Conjux Endura of each other, everyone on Iacon saw the event and celebrated. Sentinel Prime held you closely, snuzzling his helm softly against the top of yours, keeping one arm wrapped your behind and his free servo holding yours.

And you smile, preciously painted and adorned. But... something still, deep inside of your spark, knows something is wrong. But whenever you see at Sentinel's smile, you can't help but smile back and ignore that uncertain sensation.

After all - You've always been meant to be Sentinel Prime's conjux.

Everything is okay.

(ﾉ*ФωФ)ﾉ Vhaos out!

[tinfoil-jones]

Tate Pines AU 

(aka Tater McGucket is an oops baby Fiddlestan kid)

Note: LONG POST. This is me hyper fixating on a brain worm because the Gravity Falls Fandom roared back to life. This is probably misspelled in a lot of areas, and not the clearest or most concise post because this is me rambling at 2 in the morning. Also the characters are maybe OOC. Also, this is written without accents because I'm not from the Midwest or southern United States.

In this AU/Scenario, Stan is a transgender man, and 'encountered' Fiddleford during his vagabond years. It was a heavily drunk/high one-night-stand, so they never properly met or even knew each others names. This happens after Ford graduating Backupsmore University, and for this scenario to work let’s say that Fiddleford went to BMU for his undergraduate program, but then went to the local university in Palo Alto for his graduate studies.

Years later, just like in the OG show Fiddleford is Stanford's research partner in Gravity Falls, and married to Emma-May Dixon; but they don't have any children together at this time, and they got together *after* his encounter with Stan. So this isn't an affair baby scenario.

Tatum "Tate" Pines is 5 years old, living on the road with his dad, currently staying in a motel but they're about to move into a real apartment for the first time ever because Tate needs to start school soon. Stan is still a drifter and a con man, but he recently came upon a large sum of money because Tate accurately guessed the lottery number for the state they were currently in.

Stan still receives a postcard from Gravity Falls that says "Please Come", and is allegedly sent from his estranged Twin who he hasn't seen in almost 12 years. But this is roughly a few months before it would have happened in-canon.

Given Stan's disownment, no one knows that he even has a son, not even Ma Pines. Not like he'd want them to know. Having his own son and loving him unconditionally made him realize that his own dad Filbrick was a monster, who he didn't need to prove himself to. But he still wants to reconcile with Ford, so he decides to go just like in canon.

This post card, however, wasn't sent by Ford. It was sent by Fiddleford, who was watching Ford spiral in real time and hoped that if anyone could convince Ford that he was acting crazy and unstable, it was his twin brother.

While Stanford doesn't greet Stanley with a crossbow like in the original because this is before the portal test with Fiddleford, he's definitely shocked to not just see Stanley there, but Stanley with a tiny gap-toothed child in tow.

Stan doesn't know that Ford wasn't expecting them, and excitedly introduces Ford to his nephew.

Ford: Stanley, are you sure this child is yours? Stan: ...Ford, did you forget we're not identical twins?  Ford: ...Oh! Oh my, Stanley... Stan: *thinking* 'I don't know if I'm touched that you don't see me as anything other than a man... or insulted that you forgot something so fundamental about me'

Flabbergasted, Ford lets them both in; Fiddleford is welding something downstairs so he doesn't see or hear any of this. Ford plants Tate on the couch in front of the TV and practically drags Stan to the kitchen to talk to him privately; he's too surprised by Stan having a child to question why they were there in the first place.

Ford: Is there a... another parent..? Stan: ...It's just me and Tate. Always has been. Ford: How did...? Stan: I didn't plan a pregnancy... but I had no money for T-shots for months on end, and without the T, everything down stairs went to factory default.  Ford: Do you know who it is? The father- I mean, the other father? Stan: Not exactly, some southern guy, don't think I ever got his name. Ford: What happened? Stan: Funny you should ask. (FLASHBACK) Fiddleford, high out of his mind: -and that's how I won a golden fiddle. Stan, drunk out of his mind: That's crazy, dude. *grabs him aggressively by the shirt collar to pull him close* Now shut up and fuck me until I can't walk. Fiddleford, horny out of his mind: Hoo-whee, well don't you diddly-darn mind if'n I do. (END) Ford: Stanley? Stan: Hmm? Ford: Are you okay? You just said 'its funny that you ask', and then stared off into space for 10 seconds. Stan: Let's just say I never touched tequila ever again.

Eventually, Fiddleford does come upstairs when he notices Ford didn't come back downstairs, and see's the brothers in the kitchen just as Ford asks Stan why he even came here.

Fiddleford admits it was him who sent the postcard, that someone needed to 'talk some sense' into Ford, and then introduces himself to Stan.

While Stan isn't perplexed by Fiddleford because he was too drunk to remember a face- Fiddleford, who has very good memory, immediately knows he met Stan somewhere, he just can't quite place where, when, or why.

Ford does show Stan the portal, saying it's his life's work and he'll need to test it soon, and casually asks Stan if he wants to stay and help. Before Fiddleford can protest that's a bad idea and Ford should just stop, Stan agrees because he wants to reconnect (and also keep a roof over Tate's head, what were the chances they'd win another lottery?), it did hurt his feelings that Stanford hadn't reached out out to him after all, but maybe they could work on that.

While Ford hasn't exactly forgiven Stanley for the science fair incident, he can't just let his brother, a single father be homeless with a five-year-old (Stan had to drop the lease with their intended apartment to come to Gravity Falls). And... well, Ford gets attached to Tate quite early:

Tate: ... *staring at him* Ford: Can I help you with something, Tatum? Tate: Uncle, is your name "Stanford"?  Ford: Yes, but if you prefer you can call me Uncle Ford. Tate: Oh. Okay. It's funny, Stanford is my middle name. *later* Stan: Kiddo, why has your uncle been sobbing in his room for the past thirty minutes? Tate: *shrugs*

Not realizing the gravity (hehe) of the situation, Stan gets settled in the house and helps Ford and Fiddleford where he can (usually just moving heavy objects or punching paranormal creatures, or forcing Ford to shower). He does notice that Ford seems a bit... unhinged, and weirdly obsessed with some new geometry based religion, but people change after college right?

He does get unnerved by Fords weird episodes where his personality seems to shift and he goes into town to act like an absolute menace. Stan can't help but think that isn't Ford; its been years since he saw him but damnit he knew his brother and whatever entity possessed him just to slap a cops belly, *that* was not Ford. But Ford always brushed him off when he tried to bring it up, and one time 'Ford' even coldly reminded Stan that he could remove Stanley and his son from the home at any time if he wasn't going to be useful.

During this time, Stan and Fiddleford get to know each other, they get along quite well actually; Fiddleford is fond of little Tatum, who along with Stan enjoys listening to him play the banjo. One could say, given Fords obsession with his current passion project and prioritizing work over his relationships, that Stan and Fiddleford become close. 

Fiddleford picks up, however... that little Tate is a genius. Although he's a quiet kid, he has an advanced vocabulary for his age. He's able to read and write at what must be a 2nd or 3rd grade level despite not even starting kindergarten yet, and... one time Fiddleford left an 8x8 cubiks cube unattended, and came back no more than five minutes later to see that Tate had already solved it. And Stan had told him that Tate has actively predicted lottery numbers before.

He brings it up with Stan, who admits that he already knows Tate is a genius, but he also knows what academic pressure and high expectations can do to someone (referring to Ford), and he just wants Tate to live life by his own terms, not let other people dictate that for him based on his IQ.

Fiddleford... also see's resemblances between himself and Tate. Sure, Tate has browner hair like Stan, but the wavier texture is just like his own. And while Stanley does have a prominent nose, it's not as prominent as Tates, which is much more similar to Fiddlefords. 

Fiddleford begins to ask Stan about his past, specifically bringing up that he believes they may have met before.

Fiddleford: Say, Stan, did we meet before you moved here? You're so familiar to me. Stan: I wonder where you could have possibly seen my face before? *glances at the lab* Fiddleford: No. I feel like we've met before - you ever been to Palo Alto? Stan: That city in Cali? Yeah. I'd say about six years ago. I was just passing by, resupplying, and selling weed to college students. Fiddleford: You were a weed dealer? Stan: Among other things, yeah. California's *the* place to go to for weed. I don't do it anymore. Fiddleford: Did you... ever visit the university there? Stan: A couple times. Hated going there because it reminded me of... well, I think you know. Why? Fiddleford: I did my graduate studies there, maybe I met you there? Stan: You think so? I only saw buyers, did you buy weed from me? Fiddleford: No... I had a dealer, but it wasn't you. Stan: Other than that, I did get invited to a frat party once. Think they were called "SigEp" or something. Fiddleford: That's 'Sigma Phi Epsilon'. That was the fraternity I belonged to. Did I see you at that party? Stan: Probably - oh man that party was crazy. I made so many bad decisions that night. Fiddleford: Stanley... how old did you say your son was? Stan: Five, why? Fiddleford: ... Fiddleford: Stanley... *reaches out* Stan: *jerks back, before pointing away* Hey look over there, a distraction! Fiddleford: What- *looks away* Stan: *jumps out the window and makes a run for it*

Stan does not entertain any further discussions with Fiddleford about his past, and goes out of his way to keep Tate with him and away from Fiddleford. Given his criminal past, he's afraid that if Fiddleford is correct, he could make legal actions to take Tate away from him.

Fiddleford eventually goes to Ford about his suspicions.

Fiddleford: Stanford I'm going to tell you something, and I need you to promise you'll stay calm. Stanford: *doesn't look up from microscope* Are you going to tell me you suspect you're Tatum's father because you slept with my brother around the time he would have been concieved? Fiddleford: ... Stanford: Because you are. Fiddleford: What in tar- Stanford: *tosses a file folder towards Fiddleford* I have all of our DNA on file - Fiddleford: You do???? Stanford: Of course I do! I store the DNA profile of everyone who's entered my residence, just in case there's a shifter afoot. Comparing yours and Stanley's DNA to Tatum's, there is only a 0.001% chance that he isn't your biological child. Fiddleford: ... *speechless* Stanford: Congratulations, according to science you're a father.

Fiddleford does eventually manage to talk to Stan about it, and clear the air between them. Stan is apprehensive because Fiddleford is married, but he's at least relieved that Tate happened before Fiddleford was in a relationship with Emma-May. Stan allows Fiddleford to spend more time with Tate (supervised), but they agree Tate doesn't need to know just yet what Fiddleford is to him.

Fiddleford also holds back on telling his wife about Tate, he'd prefer to tell her face-to-face.

But then the portal test happens and Fiddleford gets a glimpse of the horrors beyond the portal, which traumatizes him just like in the original. This doesn't convince him to leave, because Ford is becoming dangerous and Fiddleford is worried about what would happen if Stan and Tate were left alone with him. He invents the memory gun, but holds up on using it on himself.

The relationship Ford has with both Stan and Fiddleford  becomes more explosive. Stan and Fiddleford are both telling Ford that he's messing with forces beyond his control.

To get Fiddleford off of his back about the portals, Ford instead lashes out at him about something else.

Stanford: Fiddleford... you know you're my best friend right? Fiddleford: ...Of course. Stanford: Stanley and I don't have a good relationship... we haven't in a long time. *puts a hand on his shoulder* But don't you dare hurt my brother, or nephew. I don't care how strained things are between Stanley and myself, or how close you and I are... He's my brother, and I'll always protect him, even if it's from you. Fiddleford: Do you think I would try to steal Tatum, Stanford?! *Pushes him away* Also, if you're going to threaten me, you could at least not be such a hypocrite. Stanford: How dare- Fiddleford: You say you care about Stanley? That you'd protect him? He's been homeless for over a decade! You SAW him get kicked out of home when he was still a minor! He escaped three different prisons, had extremely shady black-market top-surgery, chewed his way out of the trunk of a car, and gave birth by himself in an alleyway! He had walking pneumonia for nearly a year straight and almost died from it because he had to choose between himself and Tate over who needed treatment more!  But you didn't know any of that, did you? Because you don't talk to him or try to reach out. You still avoid him. You still treat him like he's your enemy. You're still resentful about that damn science project.  You don't know him or what he went through. You didn't even want him here, I called him up here so maybe somebody could set you straight!  Working with this portal, messing with these forces beyond comprehension and control- the only threat to Stan and our son is you! Ford: Get the hell out of my lab- and stay the hell away from my twin.

But this 'Mystery Trio'-esque era of their lives has a Bad End:

After Ford gets sucked into the portal the same way as he did in the original, Stanley decides to take over his identity; Fiddleford helps him with everything up until Stan fakes his own death.

As Tate's biological (other) father, and Stan having recently altered Tate's birth certificate to add Fiddleford, the boy is given to Fiddleford right away following Stan's 'death' and not put into foster care or an orphanage. This window of time is also when Fiddleford establishes the Society of The Blind Eye, but he chooses a leader after he founds it rather than leading it himself.

When Stan makes it clear he's going to dedicate himself to fixing the portal and bringing Ford back, Fiddleford makes a drastic decision. 

Knowing what the portal obsession did to Stanford, Fiddleford doesn't want Tate to be around if- no, when, the same thing happens to Stan. 

He uses the memory gun on Stan to make him forget about their son entirely. He does the same thing to Tate to make him forget about Stanley, legally changes his name to Tater McGucket, and takes him back to California with him.

He makes this decision because in this scenario he never used the memory gun on himself, so the memory of what's on the other side of the portal still haunts him, making him more desperate and callous, especially with a child involved.

It breaks his heart that he did this, but he doesn't want Tate to be dragged into Pines drama. He takes the boy home and tells his wife that he was conceived before they were together (looking at Tate's age, he was born at least a year before they started dating), and uses the news clipping about Stan's death to explain how he got custody without any trouble, and Emma-May adopts Tate. Tates memory gaps are excused by his young age, and the trauma of losing a parent at such a young age, so Fiddleford and Emma-May decide not to tell him about Stanley.

Stan forgets about both Tate and Fiddleford, but he has this deep sense of loss and betrayal that he can't place. He figures over the years that maybe it's just some of his feelings about Ford having gone through the portal...

Decades later, and after a divorce, Fiddleford moves back to Gravity Falls, bringing Tate with him so Tate can start his Bait and Tackle Shop somewhere quiet. Fiddleford is there to check up on the Society of the Blind Eye, and also to check on Stanley because he feels guilty about what he did. Although he knows that this is Stanley pretending to be Stanford, he says nothing to anybody about it, it's the least he could do.

When Stan see's Fiddleford again - he doesn't know why, because he's 'never met the guy', but just looking at his face pisses him off. And every time Stan see's Fiddleford from then on, whether its across the street or at the shops or what have you, he is openly hostile towards him even if he can't adequately explain why he feels this way about Fiddleford. Also strangely attracted to him, particularly his banjo playing, but its overshadowed by his hostility.

Stan meets Tate shortly after the Tate and Backles Bait and Tackle shop is opened... and he doesn't know why, but this young man he's never met makes him feel sad. But also... Relieved? Elated? Proud?? He comes by often, sometimes not even buying (or stealing) anything, he just chats with Tate (and Backle to a lesser degree).

Tate himself feels strangely fond of this frequent flier customer. Like he's met a dear old friend. He is awfully confused why Stan will sometimes call him 'Tatum', seemingly without noticing, and why he never feels like correcting him. 

Fiddleford knows why, because he never erased his own memory, and he feels so guilty. But it's been 30 years, he can't say anything without ruining his relationship with Tate (which became strained after the divorce, which in this timeline happened maybe around Tate's late teen/early adult years). 

One way that this whole thing can be revealed is when Dipper and Mabel deal with The Blind Eye society, they find two memory tubes, one labelled "Tatum S. Pines" and another labeled "Stan Pines" take it with them because it has their last name, and Grunkle Stans name, on them.

They play the one labeled Stan Pines at first, and realize it's Tates early childhood memories of Stan.

When they play the one labeled "Tatum S. Pines" they see it's all of Grunkle Stans memories of Tate, leading up to his confrontation with Fiddleford.

(MEMORY) Stan, backing up: Wait, what is that thing? Fiddleford, what are you doing with that?! Fiddleford, pointing the memory gun at him: I'm sorry Stan, I truly am. But I can't let you drag our son into this... I do care for you, and I wish things could have been different. But you're just like him!  **BLAST** (END OF MEMORY)

This horrifies them, and they have a real moral conundrum of if they tell Stan and Tate, or if they keep it to themselves to keep the peace. 

They deserve to know... but it'd be so painful. And this would take place before "The Tale of Two Stans" so they don't even know what Fiddleford was talking about to justify stealing Tate, or who 'him' is.

Eventually, it's Wendy and Soos who confront McGucket and tell him that he better be honest with Stan and Tate, or they're going to do it for him. That he's a selfish coward who ripped someone's young child from their arms.

Or, an alternative scenario; Fiddleford never stored those memories in the first place, or at least didn't store them with the Society of the Blind Eye, and it's Ford who brings this all up to Stan. Ford was already through the portal when Fiddleford decided that parental abduction was totally okay if there was amnesia involved.

Ford: Are these Tatum's children? *motioning to Dipper and Mabel*. Stan: They're Shermie's grandkids, and - who? Ford: ...Tatum? Tatum Stanford Pines? Your son. Stan: ...I don't- I don't have a son. *tears gathers in the corner of his eyes, but he either doesn't notice, or chooses to not react* And if I did, I wouldn't give him your name as a middle. Ford: Yes you do, and yes you did. You introduced us right before the portal incident. I even DNA-sequenced him to confirm that his other father was Fiddleford. Stan: WHAT? And- who?? Ford: Here, look *pulls up his DNA files from ones of his secret safes in the lab and shows it to Stanley, which not only has the DNA results but also pictures of Stanley, Fiddleford, and Tate from the time* Honestly Stanley, how could you forget a child you car-.

Ford realizes something is wrong when it's clear that Stanley is distressed, but also confused, like having a son is legitimately a surprise to him. He's so shocked he has to lie down for a bit. His eyes keep leaking tears but he doesn't know why 'Fords cruel and oddly elaborate joke' is making him so upset, because 'clearly it's not true'.

When Ford hears Fiddleford lives in Gravity Falls, he seeks him out and demands answers.

At first, Fiddleford tries to play it off like maybe Ford was remembering things wrong - but with enough pressure, and a ray gun pointed at his chest, Fiddleford finally comes clean. About what he did. Why he did it.

Ford is still angry at Stan for getting him trapped in the Nightmare Realm Multiverse for 30 years; and then stealing his name, identity, and house, but that's still his twin brother. And what Fiddleford did was to him was horrendous, especially after Stanford had already warned him years ago to not to hurt Stan or Tate. This was a crime against the whole Pines family. 

So Ford beats him up. No, he doesn't kill or maim him, but he beats the living dog shit out of him until Fiddleford promises the glass tubes of Stan and Tate's memories in exchange for mercy.

Mabel, Dipper (and Soos/Wendy) are clearly confused (because they wouldn't have seen the memories in the "The Hall of the Forgotten"). Although, this whole revelation does bring Dipper closer to Stan, because Dipper had no idea he wasn't the only transgender person in the family.

Ford shows these memories to Stan first, who is going through all kinds of emotions especially after getting Ford back and their bitter reunion. This allows Ford and Stan to somewhat reconcile early; just like how Ford lost 30 years of his life to the portal, Stanley lost 30 years with his own son because of his conviction to fix it.

Ford also has to physically stop Stan from hunting down and murdering Fiddleford (who Stan only knew as McGucket up to this point) with his bare hands. Reminding him that it's more important that he reaches out to Tate.

But Stan is conflicted. He wants to be Tate's dad again but... Tate is in his mid-thirties, he doesn't need him like he did when he was 5. And Tate already has two loving parents, both of which don't have an extensive criminal record, and who provided him with a stable home, which Stan never did because they were homeless the whole time.

Does he really want to uproot Tate's life and/or peace of mind with a revelation this big?  

This goes all the way to Weirdmageddon, where everyone gathers in the Mystery Shack for security; faced with a possible end of the world, Stan takes Tate to the side, dragging Fiddleford with them, and tells him the truth. Fiddleford confirms it all, ashamed and apologetic. Finally, they give Tate his memory tube, which he watches.

For a moment Stan and Fiddleford have a moment of solidarity; Stan can see that Fiddleford really did want to spare Tate from whatever unknown-at-the-time fate had befallen Stanford because of the portal.

Fiddleford finally faces his past mistakes, and apologizes for what he did. That what he did was wrong, and he can never make it up to them, but if they survive this maybe he could try to make things right.

This is their last family moment between the three of them pre memory-wipe.

The mind wipe thing still happens. Gravity Falls is saved. Mabel and Dipper manage to jog Stan's memory but there's no way to make him remember Tate - the glass memory tubes have already been used, and Stan didn't keep any photos from his homeless era because he couldn't afford it most of the time, and when he could he always managed to get kicked out of whatever state they were in before the photos were done developing.

Once again, Ford comes in clutch. Throughout his last journal, just like how he made entries about Fiddleford, he also made entries about Stan and Tate, including detailed sketches. How Tate liked to get into high places, exasperating Stanley who was afraid of heights. How Stan would take him to the woods to follow the creeks because Tate was intrigued by waterways. How Tate said so few words but Stan always seemed to know exactly what he wanted or needed at any given time. How Tate only liked eating the green M&M's but Stan was fine with it because he got to eat the rest. 

Now while Stan's heartwarming memories of his son come back, so does his desire to break Fiddlefords neck. 

Fiddleford still buys the Northwest Mansion and converts it to "McGucket's Hootenanny Hut", but because the Pines families are the heroes of Gravity Falls, they (Ford) manage to convince the local government to put Fiddleford on house arrest for an indeterminate amount of time as punishment for 30-something years of parental abduction and alienation (also the whole starting a Cult thing). Fiddleford accepts this, and Tate still lives with him.

Post memory-wipe Stan still reconciles with both of them, and his relationship with Fiddleford is... weird, but not entirely bad. It's like they're dating, but with a lot of emotional distance. Like, Stan still tells Ford he wants to murder him... but also tells him to never, ever, check their texting history. 

Stan still goes to sail the world with Ford on the Stan O'War II. They do invite Tate, who declines because "He'd rather just live the simple life in Gravity Falls, and not get involved in whatever supernatural gobbledygook his dad and uncle are sure to get into".

And Stan is so proud of him... because just like he said thirty years, there's nothing he wanted more for Tate than to live his life by his own terms. He video chat's with him as often as he does with Dipper and Mabel. 

Tate ends up keeping McGucket as his last name, but he changes his first and middle back to what it was originally.

And that's the end of this tale, thanks for sticking with me. Here's a passage where Ford teases Stan while they're on their sea adventure;

Ford: It was so sweet of you to give your son my name. Stan: Poindexter, I swear to Moses. Ford: Even after a decade apart. Admit it, you missed me so much. Stan: *rolls his eyes* Of course I did. Stan: Stan: But the real reason that's his middle name is because he was conceived at Stanford University. Ford: I- Ford: I really didn't want to know or think about that.

The End... Go home.

[100vern]

the great british fake-off | xmh

you thought the guy in the hawaiian-print shirt who seems physically incapable of being quiet would be the most annoying person here, so imagine your shock when it's xu minghao, who has seemingly decided you're the enemy and keeps sabotaging you. a baking competition for charity might have others on their best behavior, but what's a little sugar without some spice?

❆ pairing: minghao x reader ❆ genre: great british bake-off, holiday au; crack, fluff ❆ wordcount: 5.5k ❆ rating: e for everyone ❆ warnings: some swearing, minghao is a saboteur, idiots abound. ❆ credits: this netflix psd template for the banner. this recipe for the yule log; this recipe for the gingerbread house; and this recipe for the entremet. divider from here. this post for the divider. this was roughly edited by me, so any and all mistakes are my own. ❆ written for: the winter with you collab hosted by @camandemstudios. thank you for letting me participate! please make sure to check out the rest of the stories as they're posted. ♡ ❆ author's note: i had this rotting away in my wips since literally 2021, so even though it started as a completely different story, i'm so glad it's finally seeing the light of day even if it's not what i originally intended. (also, i know the banner says 12 contestants but the holiday specials only had a couple, okay. i forgot when i made it and i wasn't going back to fix it.)

The obnoxious one is wearing an aloha-print shirt.

He’s also extremely loud, his raucous, fake laughter filling every corner of the large warehouse you’ve been assigned to for filming. Makes a show of batting his eyelashes, throwing his head back every time someone cracks a joke that’s not even funny, comes up with nonsensical nicknames for the entire crew just to suck up to them.

“John Davies? Mind if I call you Joe?”

Joe doesn’t even make sense as a nickname for John, but John fucking loves it, apparently. Looks at the annoying guy like he just watched him string the stars in the sky.

But it’s the shirt—god, the shirt drives you absolutely crazy. He’s about to go on national television, be a household name, and some ill-fitting, charity shop Hawaiian print shirt is what he woke up and chose to wear. What’s his angle here? Appeal to the public with some sob story about only being able to afford second-hand clothes so that’s why he’s competing? Needs the money to care for a sick relative?

(The expensive watch on his wrist and his limited-drop sneakers tell an entirely different story, but you’re keeping that to yourself for now. No reason to play your hand so early.)

As much as you hate the shirt, you have to admit it suits him. The colors are garish and unsightly, just as obnoxious as he is, and you can’t stare at it too long because you start going cross-eyed. Looking at him feels about the same as stuffing your mouth with a bunch of sour candies: you get that same burn in the back of your jaw, same scrunched-up, grossed-out look on your face; have to squeeze your eyes shut to blink back tears.

You don’t even know his name, but you hate him immediately.

Your eyes scan the other contestants. None of them inspire the same level of animosity within you as the annoying one does; all of them nearly unremarkable. A variety of ages, appearances, backgrounds. You hear one say they’re a retired investment banker. There’s an accountant, a teacher, a fucking aerospace engineer.

And then it’s his turn to introduce himself. He clears his throat, speaks with an easy, practiced confidence. Completely void of nerves. Makes eye contact with everyone in your conversation circle. Gesticulates wildly as he speaks, immediately endears everyone to him.

“I’m Tim,” he says, and you nearly recoil at how honeyed his voice is. “But you can call me Tim. I’m thirty-eight, originally from a small town. Work as a…”

You can barely stand to listen to it anymore, each “Nice to meet you, Tim!” like another punch to the gut. How can’t these people see right through him? How are they falling for his bullshit? You should’ve known. Producers always throw in at least one bomb to up the ratings—a secret millionaire, someone rude and confrontational, a flat-earther. Even if you’re competing in a charity baking competition, of all things, it’s still reality television at the end of the day.

Just because the bunch of you are going to spend the next few days creating confections out of sugar, spice, and everything nice, doesn’t mean you have to be part of that ‘everything.’

Tim thinks he’s got this in the bag. Thinks he’s going to show up and win easily, the rest of you be damned, and even if you are typically a very nice person, you’re also highly competitive. There’ll be no rolling over done by you, and if Tim wants to play dirty—

Game on.

As you introduce yourself, you feel his eyes burning a hole in the side of your head. Probably because you don’t bother with the faux-humility the rest of the contestants have. Polite and charming but firm, just the way your mother had taught you. You’re not boisterous, don’t crack silly jokes to play up to the cameras the way Tim loves to do, and you know he’s scrutinizing you the way you’d done to him, trying to figure out your angle.

Well, joke’s on him—you don’t need one.

And you really, really hope it drives him crazy.

Except maybe the joke is on you, too, because you don’t account for Xu Minghao.

In true reality television fashion, the tent is boiling hot.

As if the universe itself had looked down on all of you and decided what you all needed was a heatwave uncharacteristic of this time of year, just to up the ante. Not even ten minutes in the tent and you’re all fanning yourselves and wafting air up your shirts. Which is great, really, because it isn’t like you need to use ovens or stand over hot burners. It’s not like you aren’t going to be soaking through your clothes with anxiety sweats, either! Sweat dripping off your brow into your eyes won’t matter because you don’t need to use them.

Everything’s going to be fine!

But everything is not fine. Not only has the universe gifted you with sweltering heat, it’s given you the work station directly next to Tim’s. You’ll have to feel his annoying, off-putting aura near you for the entire competition. There’s always the possibility of him bungling it and making an early exit, but you know that’s unlikely. Obnoxious he may be, you also know a strong opponent when you see one, and something tells you you’re going to be stuck with him for the long haul.

Think of the cats, you tell yourself. All of this is for the cats.

It’s not like you never would’ve returned here of your own volition. No, your first go-round with feel-good, competition-based reality television had gone fine. You hadn’t won, of course, because you wouldn’t be here again if you had, but you placed respectably in the top three. Became a fan favorite, too, which was arguably more lucrative than winning. People make a living on social media these days.

So, it’s not the competition itself that has you white-knuckled gripping onto the edge of your station. It’s the man at the one beside you, cracking all these stupid jokes about the weather and how it’s a horrible day for tempering chocolate, so he bets that’s going to be the first challenge!

You suck in a deep breath. Try to remember the breathing exercises from that one yoga class your sister had dragged you to. It had been about the same temperature then, too—well duh, it’s hot yoga, your sister had said, which was news to you, because you never would’ve signed up for something called hot yoga willingly. Still, you endured it, just like you’ll endure this, and a little sweat is not going to get in the way of you delivering a check to all those poor, sad cats without families.

“Psst, hey,” you hear from behind you. When you turn, a man is smirking at you as he finishes tying his apron around his waist—has to wrap the strings around twice, you notice, because only someone hand-picked by the gods themselves would have that shoulder-to-waist ratio.

You don’t really recognize him. Can’t recall his name or where he’s from; can’t remember what he mentioned doing for a living. Probably something artsy, if you had to guess—he definitely has the style and demeanor of a creative, with his trendy shag-mullet and the multicolored, glitter-y snowflakes decorating his nails.

You aren’t sure he introduced himself at all, but the confidence with which he holds himself—easy, like it’d take a national emergency to rattle him even a little—implies he doesn’t really have to. Most of the people here already know him, if you had to guess, and he gives the impression that he’s not fussed with impressing any of them.

If only Tim was so inclined.

You clear your throat, vaguely aware you need to respond. “Yeah?”

“Are you nervous?”

“Ah, I don’t think so? We’ve done this before, after all. We should be seasoned veterans by now.”

He smirks. “Should be,” he emphasizes. “Feels different when it’s for charity. Extra serious, you know?”

“Right,” you agree, taking a look around the tent. “Anything for the cats.”

There’s an immediate shift in the atmosphere. What was friendly and carefree is now tense; where a smile and a floral giggle sat on the man’s lips has been replaced with a crooked scowl. And it doesn’t make sense, all you’d done was agree with what he said, but then the producers are yelling something at the front of the tent, cameramen are rushing to their equipment, and a woman appears at your side and starts clipping equipment to your clothes, and there’s no time to question it. On your right, Tim’s laughing and joking around with some crew members like they’re old drinking buddies. It drives you nuts, has annoyance pricking at your skin, flushing your cheeks—

So much so that the woman at your side leans in and asks, “Should I get hair and makeup over here?”

“I—no, it’s fine.”

The unnecessary members of the production team scatter away after a loud countdown. Hair and makeup don’t come to wipe the sweat tracks from your skin. You already know Man Behind You is standing there looking perfect because he’s equally as attractive as he is mysterious. God truly has favorites, and this guy somehow made the top five.

You stare down at the instructions in front of you, confident in your ability to read but not so confident in your ability to make sense of any of it. And it’s your own recipe, which is the worst part. You’d typed this recipe yourself. These are your hand-written notes in the margins. You’ve conceptualized, tweaked, baked, and eaten this recipe more times than you can count, and now all you can do is thousand-yard-stare into the ether.

In the time since you were on the show, you’d somehow forgotten about the chaos. Not unlike that hormone women have that makes them forget about the pain and agony of childbirth, you reckon.

In addition to being one of the most bothersome people in history, Tim apparently doubles as a prophet.

Because it is a terrible day to temper chocolate, and you’ve got a bûche de Noël on the horizon that requires you to do so. You can pivot, maybe make some kind of buttercream, but a basic chocolate buttercream is not going to win you a world-renowned baking competition even if it is Swiss meringue. A child could make that.

You sigh. Push that wave of panic to the back of your mind. In a setting like this, you have approximately ten seconds to come up with a back-up plan and execute it and you wasted your time thinking, so you’re just going to have to temper the stupid chocolate and stick to your original plan. God, you have a headache.

But the show must go on, so you do too.

Step 1: Preheat the oven.

Easy enough. If nothing else, you can preheat an oven.

Step 2: Make the sponge.

Not as easy, but you’ve made so many sponge cakes throughout your life you could probably do it in your sleep. Whisk attachment on the stand mixer. Four eggs. Sugar meticulously weighed and added to the bowl. Sugar and eggs whisked together until the mixture is the color and consistency you’re looking for. Flour, cocoa powder, and salt sifted in. Metal spoon to fold it all together as delicately as possible. You won’t have a sponge cake if you beat all the air out of it, now will you?

“Good enough,” you mutter to yourself, staring down at the bowl.

At least you’d had the foresight to grease and line your baking tray, because the entire entourage arrives at your station just as you’re meant to be pouring the batter into it and sticking it in the oven.

“Ah, we meet again,” the group choruses, genuine smiles peeking through as if you’re old friends separated only by time and distance.

That’s the weird thing about being on television. For as long as you’re able, you exist within a microcosm of daily life. A world exists outside of your bubble, you know, but you don’t see much proof of it. All of your meals are eaten together; all of your conversations are had with one another. You share temporary living quarters and oftentimes too much of yourselves, and you’re thankful the show encourages teamwork and kindness because that’s the kind of thing that can grow sour if you leave it unchecked too long.

And then it just—ends.

Bubble burst, you all go back to your regular lives. You look back on that time fondly, but the friendships are thinned out by time and distance. Eventually it all starts to feel like a dream, except every now and then something breaks through the haze to remind you it actually happened: a stranger recognizing you at the store, a message on social media, the casting team contacting you to ask if you’d be interested in competing in a holiday special for charity.

“We certainly do,” you retort, smile matching everyone else’s.

All things considered, you are happy to be back. Even if the tent is crowded and far too warm, the atmosphere is unmatched, especially when it’s decorated for the holidays.

“What are you working on?”

You explain the general workings of your yule log: chocolate sponge, hazelnut liqueur cream filling, and chocolate icing to top it off. You aren’t sure how you’re going to decorate it yet—you’ll figure it out once you get there, depending on how much time you have—but you guarantee them it’ll look festive and professional.

Satisfied with your plan, they wish you luck and move on to the man behind you. It’s so great to see you again, Minghao, someone says, and you’re grateful they’ve spared you the embarrassment of having to ask for his name. It still doesn’t ring a bell, and you can’t recall what season he’d been on for the life of you, but he speaks with a patience and a gentleness that is so unlike Tim that you nearly drop to the floor in thanks.

But as the commotion of the tent reminds you, you don’t have time to waste thinking about Minghao. You’ve only been given an hour for your signature, and you’re going to need all sixty of those minutes if you have any hopes of presenting a finished product.

It doesn’t register at first.

It doesn’t register at second or third, either.

In fact, you’re sure you’re hallucinating when you open the oven door to pop the sponge inside and you aren’t hit with a blast of hot air. Room temperature. Perhaps a bit on the cooler side, if you’re being honest.

And that can’t be, because you know you preheat your oven. It was the first thing you did, because it’s always the first thing you do. It’s just… automatic, like opening your mouth to eat or washing between your toes in the shower. Instinctual. Not something that needs to even be considered, because it’s always the first thing you do.

No, this cannot be. Forgetting to preheat the oven is a rookie mistake and you’re not a rookie.

…Could it be?

Perhaps you were so caught up in the lights and buzz, the thrill of returning to the tent, that it had slipped your mind? Perhaps you’d pressed the wrong buttons and turned the wrong dials? While it’s not likely you’d somehow bumped into the oven and turned it off, nothing is impossible, so… maybe?

“Shit,” you hiss through your teeth. The producers are not going to be happy about your swearing. “Shit, shit, shit.”

“Everything okay up there?” Minghao asks from behind you. When you turn, he’s got a flour-dusted towel thrown over his shoulder as he nurses a cup of tea, and his composure in the face of your hysteria has your head spinning.

Your mouth opens and closes like a goldfish. Minghao is drinking tea without a care in the world and your oven isn’t even halfway to the temperature you need. “I—yes? No? I don’t know. I could’ve sworn I preheated the oven, but—”

“Don’t panic,” he offers, his top lip catching on the rim of his mug. “You got this. Work on something else while you wait.”

Something else. Right, you can work on something else. Both the filling and the frosting still have to be made, and quick mental math tells you there should just be enough time to get everything done if you’re efficient. Of course, that’s a big if, but that’s why you’d chosen a yule log, after all: sponge cake doesn’t need that long to bake, and anything can happen (and go wrong) in this tent.

So, you get to work on something else. Measure out a sheet of parchment paper, dust it with cocoa powder, and set it to the side. Decide to get to work on the frosting, because if one thing has already gone wrong, you don’t trust the universe to let you temper chocolate correctly.

The chocolate is halfway melted when the oven dings. A small harrumph of victory and you’re finally good to go, setting a timer for twelve minutes. Minghao offers you a discreet thumbs-up, fingers covered in something sticky you assume is marzipan.

Time flies after that. You get both the frosting and your filling made, and it’s only through divine intervention that your sponge cake comes out perfectly and with enough time to score and cool. When you dare a look around the room, everyone seems to be in a similar position as you: frazzled and covered in powdered sugar, making frantic trips to and from the refrigerators, chucking seized-up caramel into the trash and starting over for the third time with a pained expression.

A holiday special—it was supposed to be more laid-back, more for the vibes and festivity than actual competition, but it looks to you like everyone’s taking it just as seriously as your first go-rounds.

“Fifteen minutes!” someone calls, and your competitors fade out of focus. You’ve got a yule log to ice and fondant to roll out.

You make it by the skin of your teeth.

It isn’t perfect, of course, as few things on this show ever are, but it’s more than acceptable. It looks great and tastes even better which is all you can hope for. Much to your dismay, Tim also gets top marks, but it’s Minghao that shocks you all. His stollen wreath earns him a handshake and a lot of clandestine, private glares, but he’d been kind to you earlier, helped untangle that knot of pandemonium, so you return the thumbs-up he’d given you earlier with a smile that feels akin to getting away with murder.

Something is wrong.

On its own, this is not necessarily surprising. Gingerbread, tasked with bearing the weight of an entire house, can be fickle. On any other day you wouldn’t blame it if it wanted to rebel and go sideways, but the thing is—you’ve made gingerbread before. Tons of times. Another thing you could probably make in your sleep if you absolutely had to. So it doesn’t make sense when you look down in your mixing bowl and it just… doesn’t look right.

You tell yourself it’ll get better when you knead it. Maybe the color just looks off because it’s underworked, and a few good punches will set it straight.

But it doesn’t. The dough sits at your station like a sad, formless lump, giving you no indication it intends to become anything at all. Which is, admittedly, a problem. Your technical challenge is to build a gingerbread house—one complete with little windows and golden-toned nightlights, a scalloped roof dusted with powdered sugar to look like fresh snow, a working door!—and you’re far from an engineer, but you don’t think you can have a gingerbread house without gingerbread.

You sneak a peek at Tim’s station, where he’s well into measuring an immaculate-looking dough with a ruler. The contestant in front of you is in a similar place, too, so it’s with an oh fuck I’m doomed sigh that you turn around and hope to find a comrade in Minghao again.

“Hey,” you whisper, trying not to draw attention to yourself. “Does this look right to you?” You jerk a thumb in the direction of your dough-lump. Minghao, bless him, looks around you and tries his best to hide his grimace.

He does not succeed.

“Um. Well, no.”

You sigh. Place one flour-dusted hand on your waist and pinch the bridge of your nose with the other. “I can’t figure out what’s wrong with it. I’ve made gingerbread a million times.”

“Looks pale,” he offers. Of course, this is the exact moment he dumps his own dough—his beautiful dough, flawless chestnut brown—onto his station to knead it. “Was the sugar right?”

A strangled, disbelieving laugh escapes you. Was the sugar right—of course the sugar was right! Dark muscovado sugar. Everyone knows that's what you use for gingerbread, so of course the sugar was right because no one, both in their right mind and at this stage of competition, would use anything else.

Before you can respond, Minghao’s pointing at your jar of sugar. Your jar of pale, producer-supplied sugar, which even a blind person could tell does not resemble dark muscovado sugar.

A million thoughts race through your head at once, but it boils down to instinct, you think. Your brain had seen flour, butter, and sugar and went into baking mode, not stopping to take in the color of anything. Maybe a smarter, more perceptive person would put two and two together and get sabotage, but you don’t have enough time to play detective.

“Here, here,” Minghao says, hurriedly handing over his (correct) sugar. “It’ll be close, but you should have just enough time to redo the dough.”

You’re going to throw up.

In the end, a chunk of chocolate buttons is missing from the roof and the piping around the edges is far from your neatest work, but it’s passable. You already lamented your loss during the signature bake, because anything less than perfection was not going to win you much of anything, and you’re now 0-for-2 on showstopping, unbelievable, awe-inspiring confections.

Just like the devil, your fall from grace will be studied.

Overthinking isn’t going to get you anywhere, but you can’t help it.

You collapse sideways into a chair, immediately face-planting into the catering table. Everyone else buzzes around you—animated conversations that have your head spinning, words that jumble together and start to sound like nothing at all—but you’re a million miles away. One mistake is out of character for you, but two? It’s unheard of. Something you would’ve said was impossible if it didn’t happen to you just a few hours ago.

This is something you need to file away for later so you can think about it just as you’re about to fall asleep, horror and embarrassment there to keep you company when it keeps you awake until the wee hours of the morning.

A chill runs down your spine.

“Hi. Do you mind?” You startle. Bang your knee on the underside of the table. “Sorry,” Minghao apologizes, but he doesn’t look sorry at all. You shake your head. Gesture to the empty seat across from you as if to say it’s all yours. “I brought you some tea,” he continues, setting it in front of you. “I find it’s easier than coffee when you don’t know how someone takes theirs. Less chance of getting it wrong.”

You smile. Wrap your hands around the Styrofoam cup and delight in the warmth. “Thank you. This was very kind of you.”

“Seemed like you had a rough day.”

Groaning, you try to wave away his words. “Please don’t speak of it.” Minghao jokingly salutes you before miming his lips sealed. “Anyway. Let’s talk about something that is not reality television or baking or a reality baking competition.”

So, you do. Most of the talking comes from you, to be fair, but Minghao is a good listener: nods along, chimes in when appropriate, keeps the spit in his mouth where it belongs. You talk about your hometown and what made you apply for the show the first time. He tells you about growing up in Haicheng and all the things he grew up baking with his mother. You swap stories from your respective seasons; Minghao shares anecdotes with a straight face that have you clutching at your stomach.

Hours pass this way, and you end the night feeling like you’ve made an honest-to-god friend.

Xu Minghao ends the night feeling the guilt weigh him down like an albatross.

In retrospect, it is probably a bad idea to make another sponge, but no one can accuse you of learning from your mistakes.

“It’ll be a patterned joconde sponge with two mousse layers—chocolate and raspberry—and a raspberry jelly. Then I’m going to attempt to top it with chocolate and raspberry decorations.” The judges blink. Are you sure that’s a good idea? you know they want to ask, but this is a holiday competition for charity, so they’re trying not to be pessimists. “Anything is possible through holiday cheer,” you tack on, hoping your smile doesn’t look crazed.

They nod. “Right, right,” they say in unison. “Well, good luck!”

And then they’re off.

Determined to nail this, you triple-check your oven, which is preheating to a crisp 400 degrees; you double-check all your ingredients and confirm they’re correct; when you can spare the time, you watch your refrigerator like a hawk, making sure no one tries to sneak their own work in there and displace yours when you aren’t looking, but everyone’s engrossed in their respective showstoppers.

Tim’s planning a shadow box of sorts, with blown-sugar baubles and isomalt fire. Someone else is stressing over their three-tiered cake, asking the presenter if they think they’ve taken on too much. From what you can piece together, Minghao is making a three-dimensional house, also made from cake that he imported special pistachios for.

“Special pistachios?”

“Mm, from Iran. They have a better color.”

“Iranian pistachios! Can you believe it!”

But you don’t have time to worry about Minghao and his special Iranian pistachios. You have so much to do and not enough time to complete it. Your paste is in the freezer and the sponge is in the oven, but you’ve still got two mousses to make, a jelly to infuse, and little chocolate trees to create—and all of this wouldn’t be so bad if it wasn’t pointless, but you don’t want to disappoint the cats by half-assing it. They deserve your whole ass, and your whole ass is what they’re going to get.

The result is stunning—not necessarily in stature, but rather craftsmanship and effort. This is what you’re capable of. This is why you came back to the tent. For all your complaining and wanting to put your head through a concrete wall, there’s nothing like seeing the judges ooh and ahh when you present your work to them. There’s nothing like the ego boost of someone taking a bite and watching their eyes light up. There’s nothing like carrying your cake back to your station feeling proud of yourself.

“Great job,” Minghao says, a genuine smile stretched across his face. He also exceeds expectations, of course. Must be those special pistachios, you think, but your congratulations are also sincere.

Production makes a spectacle of judging, much like they always do.

The set is decorated to look like a winter wonderland, even though you’re still in the midst of autumn: a giant Christmas tree in the center decked to the nines with garland and baubles; warm, golden bulbs strung from every awning they could find; all the participants bundled up tight in festive sweaters and scarves all the way to your chins, cheeks and tips of noses dusted with red-pink blush to mimic the cold that’s nowhere to be found. Fake snow falls from the sky, and it doesn’t feel real, but it does feel magical.

One of the hosts catches you by the elbow, asks who you think is going to win. “Oh, I’d have to say Minghao,” you answer, because you’d rather die than give Tim the satisfaction. “His showstopper was incredible, but he was really great the whole competition.”

In the end, however, neither of them wins—it’s Jeon Wonwoo, three-tiered cake guy, who comes out of nowhere to claim first place. He’s bashful as he accepts his prize and says he’s going to donate the prize money to an organization that provides underprivileged kids with video game equipment. No one has a whole lot to say about that.

Once most of the hubbub dies down (and you give Tim a half-assed you did great, so sorry you didn’t win), you find Minghao near the refreshments table. He’s frowning around another mug of tea. “Alright?” you ask, helping yourself to some cider.

“For some reason, I’m no longer feeling very festive,” he replies, which is a very funny thing to say while wearing a hat with a little pom-pom on the top.

You roll your lips to keep from laughing. Sidle in a little closer and knock his shoulder with your own. “Ah, I know how you feel, but you really did do great. You were my pick to win, for what it’s worth.”

“Please don’t tell me that. It only makes me feel worse for losing.”

“Yeah.” You sigh. “Would’ve been nice to donate some money to the cats, but shit, if I didn’t know better, I would’ve sworn some dark force was sabotaging me. Like, come on—forgetting to preheat the oven? Using the wrong sugar? Not even a kid would’ve made those mistakes.”

Two things happen in rapid succession: beside you, Minghao goes very, very stiff, and you realize you had been sabotaged. And not by some dark, evil force, either. You were sabotaged by the very man standing beside you—the man you shared thumbs-up with and thought was your friend. The man whose cake you complimented and picked to win. The man who is now standing ramrod straight, as tense as a corpse, and the thought of sabotaging someone in a charity baking competition is so ridiculous and unbelievable that you just—

You just laugh.

At first, it’s a bark of stunned laughter. Then, the more it sinks in how absurd, how nonsensical all of this is, you can’t stop. Tears are rolling down your cheeks. You gasp for breath as your stomach begins to ache. People are staring, including Minghao, who sort of can’t believe what he’s seeing, but none of it does anything to deter you.

“Oh my god,” you wheeze, “I can’t believe it was you—”

Minghao groans. “In my defense, it was for the cats!”

This was not the answer you were expecting. It makes you laugh harder. “What do you mean it was for the cats?”

He swallows. Removes the mitten from one hand to run it through his hair as if that one tic was enough to distract you from everything that’s happened in the last sixty seconds. (It is.) “Listen, you told me you were going to donate the money to a cat charity if you won and I just—so was I, was the thing. I was also going to donate the money to a cat charity if I won—”

“Okay, but which one, though?”

“The Cat’s Paw-jamas.” Much to Minghao’s horror, this sets you off again. “What? What’s so funny?”

“Minghao,” you try to choke out, but you can barely breathe around the cramp in your stomach. “Minghao, that’s the charity I was going to donate to. Oh my god, you sabotaged me and I was going to donate to—to the same fucking place. Jesus Christ, this is some Gift of the Magi shit.”

Your saboteur, who has gone deathly pale, is quiet for a very long time. Every now and then he’ll open his mouth like he’s going to say something before it snaps shut again. When he does manage to speak, what comes out are mangled apologies that sound like gibberish, and you wave all of them away. “It’s water under the bridge.”

“I—I really don’t think it should be?”

“Minghao, it’s fine, trust me, this was just for fun—”

“No, I really insist.”

You sigh, good-natured and exasperated. Something about the fake snow has you feeling romantic and a little bold, so you turn, grab him by the lapels of his coat. “Please tell me if I’m misreading this, but if you insist, maybe you can start by taking me to dinner…?”

This was clearly not what MInghao was expecting you to say. Dazed, he recovers quickly, the corners of his mouth tugging upward in a half-smirk. “Dinner, hm?” You nod. “I think I can manage that.”

You smile. “Great. How do you feel about cat cafes?”

[fallloverfic]

Finished the second season of Castlevania: Nocturne and loved it! Spoilers below.

Angry boi PROTEC HIS MAN!!!! Just his running to Mizrak, so worried. Even interrupted his revenge. I just love that his serpent form came back T-T And multiple times!!!

The fight scenes were so good!!! Just so many amazing ones!

ALSO WHAT DOES ADRIAN MEAN NOT THE FIRST TIME YOU SAVED MY LIFE???? I AM-!!!!

(So happy they know each other and I think it's hilarious my fic could potentially be a prequel now alkdjalkdjaljdalj)

Everyone cute. Annette and Richter were just awww. Glad Edouard and Annette get to stay together, and Edouard can go home and get his bass player :3

Also so many gorgeous Adrian bits. Truly. Him coming out of the river was so mmmm. Also loved all the magic he got to use XD And the music was fun!

Also loved all the Egyptian stuff. The soul count was a little... (I was like why are you saying just 2 or 3, there's more than that...?), but apparently the # of parts has changed over time (it's not just 4 or 5) and it's you know, vampires during the French Revolution, so sure, whatever. The trip to Duat was fun! And Ammit's form was pretty cool.

Poor Tera. Bye Emmanuel, no one misses you.

Loved that we got some dragon fighting. Also that the dragon didn't die. Was worried. Though I will say, Sekhmet punching it was kind of funny aldkjlaj I felt sort of bad when Juste, Richter, and Maria were all boosting its breath like, "That can't be too comfortable for the dragon..."

Just think it's funny we have animated Robespierre joining forces with the son of Dracula to defend Paris from a crazy Hungarian serial killer noble who believes she's the reincarnation of an ancient Egyptian goddess lol

The return of Drolta was really fun. I was sad she was in so relatively little of season 1. This was really great.

For historical things, I appreciate that they referenced how folks in France sold and bought food to watch executions. I also appreciate the reference to the trend of European obsession with eating mummies.

I will be thinking about Mizrox's future. I feel bad I'm mostly happy Olrox survived the season lol I like Mizrak just fine, and I like that Olrox likes him, but my priority is Olrox, not Mizrak, sorry lol Clearly they have some things to work out XD Should be fun (for someone, I hope). Someone else pointed out they never talked about the animal/soul stuff, and it was kind of just... Mizrak getting over it (or side-stepping it) and not apologizing to Olrox about it. And Olrox just... kind of accepting that the guy he's in love with is like this. I think it's funny that after having written You reluctant demon back in 2023, where they do have a conversation about it, I completely forgot it as a thing I wanted to happen lol Cause in my mind the matter is settled. Like the show, quite frankly, feels like neat fanfiction to me at this point (that's not what it is, but that's how my brain works, it's part of why I wasn't as anxious about season 2 releasing as I was for season 3 of the first series releasing). It's great in all the things it does, amazing stuff I never could have thought of, which is far better than a lot of the stuff I did in my fic (and those fight scenes, dang). But yeah, I do agree, they should have talked about it. And they don't. And it's... mm...

Another thing is that Mizrak maybe still has some racism to unpack. There's that line Olrox has about when his people were massacred by the Spanish, and Olrox says, "And our terrifying gods could do nothing to save us." And Mizrak replies, "Perhaps your gods were the problem," and it's like what the fuck Mizrak lol I don't know if it's part of his struggles with his own faith, which is very obviously happening, how if a god exists, they're allowing all this stuff to happen, that Emmanual failed so hard, and believing in a god - which is his issue - is causing so much of his issues (it's making him believe his affection for Olrox is false, that Olrox doesn't have a soul, and/or it's not saving him from what he believes is a wrong attraction, idk). Or, from a semi-logical standpoint, that Olrox's people were attacked because they weren't Christian, and that the Spanish wouldn't have attacked Olrox's people if they were Christian. Or simply that "well it's your fault for not being Christian", I have no idea. It's a weird moment. We have really not moved past the "animal" conversation all that much. Olrox is very, very forgiving. And I am way more forgiving because I forgot I resolved most of this in my fic over a year ago lol I don't know, relationships are messy, I enjoyed what I saw of them. Olrox running to Mizrak's side was a lot and I loved it. The way Olrox is like, "I thought you wanted to know" killed me.

ANYWAY though... it was a good season. Really, I liked it.

[myreallovelymind]

First time being tied up with rope

The day started like a lovely normal date. We went for brunch. We chatted, we shared about our lives and we laughed. We have a stroll along the river, go to a few shops and wonder back to his. It was such a lovely afternoon.

We got back to his flat and put TV on. My legs were on top of his just relaxing. We put a British show which is really funny and that you wanted to pay attention to. He just starts stroking my legs softly. He opens my legs, put his palm there and tells me he just wants to feel. This man spends the next 45 minutes teasing me above my tights. Gently rubbing my clit. Tapping on it. I forgot how much I love a slow tease. I can feel my underwear and tights get soaked. I can focus on the TV up to a point where I end up just switching off.

He spoons me as we kiss. Hard. Deep, strong, horny kisses, full of need. Fuck. I need his cock. I can feel his hard cock at my entrance but there’s many layer between. I need him in me. He gets up to get a condom and tells me to take my tights off. He comes back. I straddle him. I’m so wet and so apprently, really tight (thanks to edging woo). He feels incredible. He tells me to lean back and take his whole cock like a good girl. Fuck. I kinda space out. I feel like long foreplay makes my brain mushy, turns it off and I just run on this primal need for sex. He removes my dress and I had my nice strappy bra and my black thong. This man keeps telling me how hot I look and how good I feel. I get all shy when he says it but it does feel great.

I’m too loud, as usual. I geniuly don’t mean to be loud. He asks me to be quiet but I then focus so hard on that, that I stop focusing on bouncing. So he gags me with a lovely red ball gag. I oddly feel so pretty with it on. I think its partly because he thinks I’m hot with it on but also, I love it. I love trying to kiss him with the ball gag. I love getting close to his chest. I feel so submissive with it on. So small. I’m edging on his cock.

He tells me to get on my knees on the sofa.

He fucks me doggy and my brain is off. He calls me a fuck toy and I need that. He grabs my hips and fucks me hard. He then grabs my hair and… wow. I arch my back, put my head back and I just feel. I feel all the sensations in my body. I hear his moans, I feel the pressure on my scalp, I feel my pussy getting pounded, I feel my thighs jiggle and I feel the need to cry. Good cry. Happy cry. Overwhelmed by all the amazing sensation cry. He asks me if I want him to cum and I say yes through the ball gag. He cums just before tears stream down my face and I collapse. I stay bent over the sofa, gagged and breathing. He comes behind me and strokes my body. I love it.

We start watching the football. I remove my bra so I’m now in his t-shirt with new underwear and socks. We cuddle and he very much enjoys the post cumming head space. We order ramen as we watch the NFL games. We kiss and we get horny again. I ask him if he can tie me up. He says of course. He says he’s going to be mean. He ties my thighs so when I pull on my foot, it tightens around my thigh and when the other foot moves, it tightens around my pussy. The sensation is something I didn’t realise I needed. I immediately knew I wanted more and that I didn’t want it to end. My hands are also tied behind my back. I didn’t quite realise how much I loved it until he touched my pussy and it’s wet. Clearly I like it, a lot.

He gets my clit sucker toy and moves the mirror so I can see myself. Shit. He had sent me a meme about something similar earlier in the day and here I am. He gets behind me and starts to use my toy on me. Finding the clit is tricky but with some good non verbal communication, it’s exactly where it’s supposed to me. I’m almost immediately on the edge. I’m trying to hold. It’s hard. He is holding me so I put my head on his shoulder. He puts his hand over my mouth and nose. Fuck. I love it. He tells me to look at myself. I hate it. I look up and fuck. I can only focus on him and me. He looks so hot behind me and I look so submissive. I’m shaking and he stops the toy. I breath. He puts it back on. I start to shake. He tells me to look up again. I do. Now he has his hand around my throat and I can’t look away. This is me but it doesnt feel like me. I’m never felt so hot? I squirm trying to get away to not cum. I nod my head side to side and he stops.

He makes me turn around when it’s hard to move. I always feel so dumb but I guess that’s part of the humiliation. He tells me I’m going to make him cum before dinner arrives. I’m on my knees, and I’m tasting him. He tastes so good. I love his moans and the way he holds my head. I always forget how much I enjoy oral. He sits down on the sofa and I keep going. It’s getting hard especially without my hands. Every time I move, I face plant on him which is fun. Food arrives before I make him cum but he puts the food down and sits back down. No cumming, no food. I put his cock in my mouth and start giving him head. He gets close and cums in my mouth. Yummy. I can get used to that.

He uncuffs me but my legs are still tied. We eat the ramen and we both feel sleepy. He goes for a nap and comes back 30 minutes later. He comes for a cuddle. My hands are cuffed together but he tightens them because I have small wrists so I can easily escape. That’s when I know I’m getting fucked again. We kiss, hard. I really love the change in kissing. It’s cool how you can tell which move we are depending on the kiss. Slow and soft: post sex. Slow and hard: normal. Faster and hard: pre sex.

Anyway, we kiss hard. He undoes my cuffs and tells me to get him hard. To focus on that as he plays with me. He then tells me to bend over the side of the sofa where he placed a pillow and he got the blindfold out. He cuffs my hands behind my back, gags me, and blind folds me. He is not gentle this time. I feel a little used which I like. He goes deep and I just need to deal with it. Again, my brain goes off. I go quiet. I grunt at times but I just take in what’s happening. This feels like a place my mind wants to be to decompress. It felt like such a relief. I remembered why I love BDSM and kink. It’s not many places in my life where I can just… exist without my brain working. In this moment, it feels like I’m just serene. Which is funny because he is not gentle with me. The back and forth. He cums. I collapse. I don’t want to move. He strokes my body again and checks in because apparently I look broken but it’s the opposite. He unties my legs which have the marks on them which are beautiful. We cuddle. We finish the NFL game and we go to bed. He’s cummed three times and I haven’t even ruined a single orgasm. Dreamt.

[raccoonsface]

“T-Tara?” Pt.2

____________——————————____________

Words- About 750

Warnings- angst or fluff, idk tbh. Swearing, idk what else

Just to say some stuff, I lost my other emails’ password and that email was connected to my other account so I’m on this one now. Sorry for being gone for so long too!

Summary- Y/n and Tara have a crush on each other and go to great lengths to make sure they have them all to themselves.

————————______________———————-

Part 1

______________————————_____________

“Jeez the suns out early”

Tara has just woken up from her sleep, she was tired from all the running around yesterday.

She almost falls back asleep because of it but then she turns over and takes a look at her clock

“SHIT! ITS 10:30 AM IM LATE FOR SCHOOL”

She rushes to get all of her stuff packed so she can make it to school before lunch, which is at 11:30, so it shouldn’t be that hard… right?

“Okay I’m fucked… I can’t find my keys.”

Oh Well she’s fucked

————————______________———————-

______________————————_____________

Tara’s POV

“I’m gonna fucking die”

I’m not gonna make it there in time, come on Tara run faster. Damn it’s hot out

Fuck I didn’t bring my inhaler, again?!What the fuck Tara, you’re gonna die on the side of the street. I’ve gotta sit down, yeah the sidewalk under this tree looks fine.

“Damn two days in a row”

Is this heaven? Ugh it’s too bright here.

“Hah, no this isn’t heaven Tara” oh it’s Y/n

“Well if it isn’t then what am I doing looking at a goddess” damn what’s going on right now

“Geez don’t you got the pick up lines when you’re literally gasping for air”

She’s funny, and really pretty

“Okay, Tara here you go” Her and that extra inhaler

I mean it definitely feels way better when I can breathe that’s for sure, but every time I look at her I loose my breath anyways so I don’t really see the point in it.

“You good Tara?” So kind

“Huh, oh yeah” me and my dumbass self

“Okay good… what are you doing running out here with a backpack on anyways?” Looking for a princess like you

“Oh- uhm I’m running late for school”

“Huh, I didn’t know there was school on Saturdays” shit of course it’s Saturday, that’s why my alarm didn’t go off.

“Oh… I forgot it was Saturday” oh my god you sound like an idiot Tara!

“Huh, well you need a ride to get home?” I think I’m gonna faint

“Uhm I mean if you’re willing to” Oh. My. God.

“I mean if you want me to” of course I do beautiful.

“Uh I mean yeah sure”

“Okay, yeah, alright uhm my cars over there”

“Right! Right, I gotta get up” oh my god she’s reaching out her hand towards me, oh I’m gonna die when I get home

“Thanks”

“Yeah, no problem” She seems kinda shy.. it’s probably nothing I’m over analyzing

“Damn this car seat is comfy” no like holy shit this is comfy

“Yeah, I know, they’re custom seats.” Of course they are

“Anyways where do you live?” Oh right!

“Oh uhm it’s uhh” me and my damn it stuttering

“You wanna go eat instead? I mean you must be hungry from all that running, and I don’t mean to-“ aww she’s so cute I can’t believe I survived without her before

“I’d love to go out with you- I mean yeah I’m down to go eat with you” what the hell Tara

“Huh, right, anyways where should we go?” Shit I don’t know

“Uhm, let’s go tooooooo…” I have no idea where to go eat

“How about we drive around and figure out where to eat..?” Phew!

“Yeah I think that’s probably the better idea” she’s really smart… she could be my wife..

OKAY NO Tara get yourself together. You cannot do this. But she’s so perfect.. maybe just maybe. I can’t even fight it anymore.. I need her. I need Y/n.

————————______________———————-

Oh my god. A lot has happened in the past two months. The meaning behind this new account is between the warnings and the summary at the top.

Sorry for the short post! They’ll be way more sooner!

I have a three part series for Astrid Deetz, the last two parts will probably come out after the movie is released because I can’t really get much off of her character just from the trailer

Anyways hope you guys have had a nice day!

[steddieas-shegoes]

is that tax fraud?

for @corrodedcoffinfest warm-up round prompt ‘taxes’

rated t | 671 words | cw: language | tags: they’re just so stupid, and I love them, look Steve is here!

🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸🎸

“What the hell do you mean you’ve never filed taxes?” Jeff asked Gareth as they sat around trying to write a song.

Keyword: trying.

Now it looked like they were gonna be figuring out how to keep Gareth out of fucking prison for tax fraud.

“I thought our band accountant handled it!” Gareth exclaimed.

“We don’t have a band accountant! The label just handles our money!” Jeff exclaimed back.

“Okay, let’s calm down.” Eddie, the voice of reason at this moment, held his hands up towards them. “Technically, Gareth only turned 18 two years ago. That’s only two years of back taxes. And if he’s honest, it’ll be fine! He probably didn’t even make enough the first year for them to care.”

“Well, I did get an inheritance from my grandpa who died,” Gareth said unhelpfully. “Does that count as income?”

Everyone stared at him in shock.

“This is a joke,” Freak said from his spot on the couch. “Has to be.”

“Oh my god, our drummer is actively committing tax fraud,” Jeff put his head in his hands.

“Guys, it’s fine! I’ll just file it all this year,” Gareth assured them.

“We should call someone. Right? Someone should be told about this,” Eddie started pacing the floor, wearing a trail into the shag carpet.

Who even put shag carpet in here? Shag was terrible.

The door swung open and Steve walked in holding three large pizzas and a grocery bag full of sodas.

“They didn’t have any Mountain Dew, but that’s probably for the best. You guys have a conference call in an hour so eat up,” he said as he started setting everything on the coffee table. He looked around when he realized it was way too quiet. “Everything okay?”

“Stevie. I fear our drummer may be going to prison.”

Steve paled. “What? Why?”

“He forgot to tell the government he has money. For two years.”

“He what?” Steve looked at Gareth to explain.

“I didn’t know I was supposed to file my own taxes! I thought we had a guy!”

Steve looked between all of them. He looked at Gareth.

“You do have a guy. The label provides a guy. I think his name is Sam? Maybe Shane.” Steve shook his head. “Either way. You have a tax guy. He filed for all of you last year.”

You could hear a pin drop in the silence.

“What do you mean? We all filed for ourselves last year. Except Gareth, apparently,” Jeff was frowning at the floor.

“Uh, well, you may have given double the money, then,” Steve laughed, though this wasn’t exactly funny.

“So let me get this straight: the label provided a guy to do our taxes without telling us. We all file our own taxes after this guy already did. No one caught it. Gareth’s the only one who hasn’t double paid into the fucking government?” Eddie asked, face red with shame or anger, it was hard to say which.

“Yeah, appears so.”

“Fuck you guys. Had me worried I was going to prison and I’m the only one who’s done shit right!” Gareth laughed. He reached for a slice of pizza and sat back in his chair, smug smile on his face. “Feels good to have my taxes paid.”

“Shut the fuck up,” Freak rolled his eyes. “So how do we get money back if we double filed?”

“Not sure we can,” Jeff sighed. “Probably isn’t worth figuring it out anyway. It’s not like we were rolling in for last year’s taxes.”

“But this year…” Eddie started.

They all looked at each other and nodded.

Yeah. This year would be different. They’d skyrocketed after the release of their first album and their first tour. Money was…pretty fucking great.

“So…pizza?” Steve asked.

They all nodded and started grabbing for their food.

“If you guys want, I’m sure Nancy can try to find a way to get money back. She’s good at that stuff,” Steve suggested.

“Nah, she’d call us idiots.”

“Well, if the shoe fits.”

“Hey!”

[umadosedepascal]

72 HOURS WITH HIM | Pedro Pascal x f!reader| PART IV

Written by Santa trindade

Banner by @ithedevilsbaby

Made in Brazil

Pairing : Pedro Pascal x f!reader

Summary: The shooting in Malta keeps going, all Pedro needs is a weekend off, well…he got it. Would you go meet him for only three days? Hmmm yes!

warning/rating: [first person][unprotected piv] [SMUT] [one bite] [Pedro dominates][overstimulation][holding neck] [slaps][take off your clothes][oral m receiving/f receiving][spitting] [eating cum][champagne on body][dirty talk]

w/c: 5.6k

a/n: you guys know Pedro is a sweetheart, but for us, in bed.. he is kinda diff. It can have fluff moments here and there but what we want is to see how dominating he is…with you. HAPPY NEW YEAR! 💦

"How far would you go for a wonderful sex?"

I have asked myself this question over and over again since Pedro called me two days ago, almost begging me to go to another continent just to see him for three days.

How far would I go? Well, it's a funny question, even a little embarrassing, but here I am landing at Malta airport.

When Pedro asked if I would like to stay with him for a weekend in Malta I thought it was a joke, because until then I thought he was in another place, it is difficult to keep up with his routine, we talk almost every day texting, he calls me whenever he can, for him the end of the day is the beginning for me.

This time he looked different on the phone, his voice a little tired, but the excitement was present, a little more excited than usual...

"Hey babe, listen... I'm in Malta now, we managed to advance a few scenes, that was crazy, but... I will not shoot for next few days, then I thought you could come, who knows... Stay with me, just three days if you want..."

He knew my answer would be yes, and in less than thirty minutes an email with a ticket to Malta was there.

As soon as I leave the airport gate, I see a man holding a sign with my last name, he drives me to the hotel. The city is beautiful, but I can barely pay attention on the landscape that runs through the window, my thought are on the last message that Pedro sent me.

"I can't wait to have you here with me..."

Pedro asked me to be confidential, even though I'm a complete stranger, he doesn't need this kind of attention now, so we are staying in separate rooms, for all the rest I'm just a tourist.

The room he got for me is ridiculously huge, huge bed, huge bathtub in the background, with framing pillars, giving an almost Greek touch, I could feel Aphrodite herself here.

I unpack my suitcase and get a short and fresh dress, I go to the bathroom, ignoring the desire to get into the bathtub.

_Later, dear, later_

I enter the bathroom and look in the mirror, seeing my reflection, biting my lower lip I think

_He's worth this whole trip. It's only three days, he'll be away for months, and fuck, I miss him so much... _

After a relaxing shower I get dressed and when I pick up my phone to send him a message, someone knocks on the door.

“Yeah? Who is it?” I ask while a message him.

“Room service” the voice says behind the door.

I didn't ask for room service, maybe I forgot something at the lobby. I go towards the door and when I open it, there he is, standing at the door side smile, his hands behind his back.

Before saying anything, I just stare at him, the good old yellow Lakers t-shirt, blue shorts with green details, striped socks and NB’s. He is hot, skin slightly tanned, messy hair, everything in him was so perfect that I could stare at him for hours. Seeing him there in front of me out of nowhere made me let out an involuntary sigh, which made his smile open more and say, knowing the power he had over me.

“I couldn't wait to see you...”

I pull him into the room, he closes the door behind him and pushes me to the wall, getting my lips close to his I say:

“Thanks for the invite, too bad we can't hang out here together..” he puts his lips in my ear and says in a whisper:

“I know babe, but you know the drill...” I smile and answer

“Yeah, I know... But i'm stocked whit this room... Look at this hot tub, you crazy” without thinking Pedro slides his hand off his back and goes down my right thigh and says:

“Exactly like my room, but you know what? I had a picture of us fucking on that hot tub... That's why I brought you here” so I feel the burning of the slap where his hand caressed me.

I take his hand and lead him to the mini bar, and say that I was waiting for him to choose us a drink, he frowns looking at the options and looks at me.

“Sparkling wine?” I say.

He takes off the seal with his mouth and laughs when the cork flies up screaming “To the hot tub!”. Laughing together he serves us, we toast looking at each other, the desire is already on fire. He looks at me, glazed on me. All his movements seem to be planned to drive me crazy.

He serves the glasses again while telling me the experience has been, he tells in such an excited way that I don’t realize it I'm smiling just from hearing him speak. We drank one, two, three glasses, while we are sitting on the benches of the mini bar. He speaks and I just listen, I could stay all night listening to the sound of his voice telling about anything, right now I'm so hypnotized that I don't care about anything else.

“You are beautiful babe... Did you get ready for someone in particular?” he says in an ironic but sensual tone, while rubbing his cold hand from the wine glass under my dress, gently smoothing my thigh, his thumb drawing circles on my skin.

“I’m here to meet someone, some hot guy” I return the affection, putting my hand on his thigh, walking with my fingers and squeezing slowly. The touch is so soft, but it seems to be enough to light something inside it.

“I'm here exclusively for him.”

Pedro straightens his posture on the bench and lets out a slow sigh, staring at me, a look of desire that I recognize perfectly, he has looked at me like this so many times.

He gets up from the bench and holds out his hand, inviting me to get up too. He lays his hands on my waist and squeezes slightly, pulling me closer to him. At this moment I feel that he is already hard, his body is hot, and I can say that mine is the same . Every second he touches me, it's a second more than I want him, I want to have him inside me, fuck all I want now is him inside me.

“What a lucky guy, huh?” he speaks bringing his lips closer to my neck, the hot air of his breath, beard shaving my skin, it chills me all over, I close my eyes and throw my head slightly back, exposing my neck more as he drags his teeth through my neck, the feeling of his body touching mine intensifies, his mouth touching my skin slowly makes me release a low moan.

“You have no idea how many times I dream of you here” he says softly while I arch my back

“I imagined you in that hot tub “ he says as he raises his head pointing to the jacuzzi, his fingers now play with the straps of the dress on my shoulders, he lowers them letting them fall to the sides.

“I imagined you screaming my name while I make you cum... I imagined several times, I even dreamed about it”

My body is taken by an overwhelming, wild desire, it knows exactly how to drive me crazy, and at this moment I can only formulate a single phase in response.

“Well, I'm here exclusively for you...make your dreams come true” smiling at him I watch his look darken

“You shouldn't say things like that babe... I can be very demanding” he says and I feel his fingers walking through my arms, until our hands are intertwined. He looks at my breasts still covered by the dress, he looks up slowly, stopping at my lips and moving on to my eyes.

His look is pure fire, that brown sea seems to be burning, and I can't wait to get burned.

Pedro takes my hands and guides him to front of his shorts, even through the fabric I can feel how hard he is, as soon as my hands find his cock, he pushes his hip forward and moans low when I squeeze him.

“Are you feeling this? How did I miss those hands…”

His hands go up to my face, framing my face he passes his thumb through my lower lip, I bite and pass my tongue soon after, this makes him bite his own lip, growling softly.

He lowers his fingers to my neck, holding firmly, lowering his nails so slowly that it makes me breathe heavily, I close my eyes feeling his touch, when I feel his hands go down to my breasts I open my eyes and face those eyes that are my doom.

His hands rest on the sides of my breasts, his thumbs slide until I find my nipples goosebumps, even under the fabric of the dress they are still visible.

“I have an idea” he moves away and sits back on the bench, one arm on the bench holding a glass and the other hand he wraps the shoelace of the shorts around his fingers. He looks at me for long seconds, I stand still, my body obeys him in a way that I am not able to explain.

“Slowly take off the dress for me... “

I feel my blood boiling, my heartbeats rise to my ears, my body burns, looking for him, in need of him.

I hold the dress on my breasts and slowly lower it, feeling his eyes burn me, the fabric slips and gets tangled up on my waist, I look at him and he is drinking the champagne while squeezing his cock over his shorts, with up and down movements.

“Fuck, you are so fucking hot you know that? Take off your clothes “ I push the dress down and then it falls into a puddle at my feet, leaving me only in black lace panties.

Pedro raises his right hand and calls me with two fingers, I walk to him feeling my legs shaking, but I keep my gaze fixed on his. He pulls me keeping me trapped between his legs, his hands holding my ass.

“ Now be a good girl and turn on that jacuzzi for us huh? “ he says giving me a strong slap in my side thigh, my skin burns.

I go to the hot tub, walking through the room only in panties and feeling his eyes follow my movements, I sit on the edge of that and press all the buttons that are there, I look at him and give a shy laugh confessing:

“I don't know how to...” he approaches and as he slowly climbs the steps he takes off his shirt by throwing it on the floor

I feel my throat dry and my mouth open watching him…

_How did he look like that in such a short time? _

He quickly presses the right button and the bathtub starts to filling up, he extends his hand and calls me to bed

“It's going to take sometime to fill up”

Still watching his body change, I don't hold it and ask

“How?” he shrugs and answers “For the movie, babe”he holds my wrists and pulls me against his chest and it’s hot, I immediately put my lips on his neck, he moans and grabs my ass tightly.

I go down slowly licking and kissing every inch of slightly salty skin, I pass my tongue in a circle through his nipples, I bite gently and it makes him moan and smirk.

I raise my eyes and see that he is following every move I make. I go down slowly while my hands undo the knot of his shorts, I slide my hand inside and I feel his pulsating, I notice the small wet spot of excitement over his boxers and pull his cock out slowly, just the tip, light pink mush head already drooling pre cum.

I look at him again, he grabs my hair and says softly:

“Suck me” I run my thumb through the head, spreading the pre cum, I say:

“Is that what you want?” he moans begging “Yea yea do it” taking his hand behind my head he grabs the back of my neck against his cock, I feel his trimmed pubhair next to my nose.

On my knees I run my hands through his thighs, pull a little his boxers leaving only his cock out, hold it and pass my tongue all over his shaft, reaching the tip cleaning the pre cum, hold by the base near the balls and put it in my mouth, feeling it touch my throat. He gasps, I can feel how ready he is to fuck me any minute.

Between sucking and licking I go up, licking his body until I stand up and pushing him to sit on the edge of the bed, I climb on his lap, I sit on top of his hard cock rubbing myself, grabbing his hair and kiss him slowly, savoring his mouth, his mustache pinching me. He holds me by the thighs and gets up, he interrupts the kiss and looks at the hottub that is ready, he says:

“Let's go?”

Pedro lets me go and hold his hand guiding him to the jacuzzi, his gaze fixed on my body, as if he had never wanted me as much as he does now.

My trembling legs can barely climb the steps without faltering, when I reach the edge, I pull him close to my body and wrap the back of his neck in my left hand, causing his face to go close to mine, my right hand slides through his tummy til it reaches his hard on, holding his cock I feel him twitching at my touch.

I bring my lips closer to his with a soft kiss I go down to his neck passing my tongue slowly until I get close to his ear I say low:

“Your turn” whispering I hook my fingers to the waistband of his shorts and I take it off, as the clothes go down my body follows, his cock jumping on my face, getting on my knees to him.

I take off his shorts throwing them to the side, untie his NB’s throwing same side as the shorts. I raise my eyes to find his eyes that I believe at no time have deviated from me.

I hold his thigh with my left hand while the right goes up to to his dick and start stroking him, he sighs and throws his head back, his breath getting panting again getting heavier as I accelerate the movements, the tip of his pink cock getting full of pre cum

“Oh fuck... Fuck” he moans while I touch him, I can feel his thigh muscles contracting every time I run my thumb over the head of his cock and sucking my finger looking at him

“Let me fuck that mouth... Let me” I barely give him time to beg and start sucking him, he moans so hot, putting a hand on my head, holding my hair in his fist, dictating the rhythm he wants.

“Your mouth is so hot, so fucking hot babe” he talks among moans and hisses. I'm already dripping, the excitement taking over my body. Pedro pushes my head against his cock, making me choke, it makes my pussy pulsate.

He knows he could fuck my mouth all night long, but he remembers that there is something better waiting for him, so grabbing my hair he pulls me up, leaving me standing in front of him. He looks to the side, towards the windows that frame the landscape outside.

“This view, I thought about you several times while looking at it” he turns me around, leaving me with my back to him, I feel his skin hot a thin layer of sweat. Pedro holds my hair and with his lips close to my ear, feeling the hot and panting breath, it's all so intoxicating.

“Yeah, it's pretty “ I agree, the view is beautiful, but my body can't focus on what my eyes see, the excitement has taken over me, so I close my eyes and let the feeling of his body glued to mine dominate me.

“Open your eyes” he says with his chin resting on my shoulder, I feel Pedro lower his fingers going down my back, scratching me going towards my ass, his fingers playing with my panties, pulling down so slowly, taking off my panties he throws in a corner, his right hand between my legs rising together more until he finds my pussy, his index and middle finger sliding through my wet pussy, Pedro bites my ass and gets up licking my back until he reaches my neck, keeping his hand over my pussy and whispers in my ear:

“I came in the hot tub thinking about you, you know? Watching this view, and now... Now I'm going to make you cum the same way.”

Then Pedro slide two fingers inside me, with precise movements, I try to muffle my moans, covering my mouth, he pulls my hand and holds my arm behind my back making me get closer to him.

He is not fast, the movements are calm and precise, a calculated torture. Every time he fucks I feel my pussy squeeze around his fingers.

He takes out his fingers and circles my waist slowly, going down his hand he begins to make circular movements on my clit, making me arch my back, I'm so close to cumming, I close my eyes without feeling and he quickly orders

“Open your eyes my little bitch, open!“ he talks while fast the movements on my clit, I feel the orgasm approaching

“I want you cumming enjoying the view... Just enjoying the view babe “ he again slides two fingers in my pussy roughly, his palm rubbing my clit, that's enough and makes me cum on his fingers, he moaning in my ear satisfying himself with my pleasure. My body trembles glued to his body, Pedro gets even harder, I can feel him against my ass.

He holds my waist and turns me to him, kissing me I feel my body still shaking, recovering from orgasm.

“I love how your body responds so fucking well to me” he lowers his head and licks the curve of my neck, distributing bites

“And I want more” I say while I feel his tongue torture me, walking around my neck, I close my eyes and I feel his cock poking my stomach, leaving it wet with pre cum.

Pedro say softly everything he wants to do to me, only the sound of his low and hoarse voice is enough to excite me more and more. I put my hand between our bodies and stroke him, feeling how his cock is pulsating, how hot it is feeling his breath in my ear.

“ I want you so bad in this jacuzzi babe, but right now i need to feel you... Be inside you” Pedro says this by holding my neck so that I look him in the eyes and puts the fingers that were in my pussy in his mouth, proving my taste, he closes his eyes while savoring me, moaning.

He takes my hand and guides me to the edge, he sits down and I watch his body, his back touching the marble, he opens his legs and my eyes rise watching the shapely thighs, his cock twitching over his stomach, his hair even more shaggy.

It's an unbearable sight.

“ Ride me, sit on me….” a moan escapes from my throat with his order, as I'm going down to ride him he slaps my right thigh hard.

“Sit with your back to me, slut “ I love it when he curses me like that.

I crouch down and feel him holding his cock and rubbing it through the entrance of my folds, hitting my clit torturing me.

Pedro moans some Spanish words in my ear, hearing him speaking like that is what makes me pulse and sit on his cock, feeling him fill me completely.

With a loud moan I feel his desperate hands holding my waist, guiding the movements, back and forth back and forth…I squeeze his cock and that's enough for Pedro to bite my shoulder and hold my neck with his left hand, with his right he grabs me tightly, going down his hand to swipe my breasts, squeezing and pulling my nipples. He holds my neck and pulls me making me stick my back to his chest

“My favorite bitch you love to squeeze my cock huh? Come on, give me one fucking more... Cum for papi” he says this between bites, Pedro slides his hand until he finds my clit, his fingers circling hard making me scream, but my screams and moans are being strangled by his hand on my neck, I feel my vision dark but it's so good that I don't say anything but moans and supplications.

I grind rubbing myself, my hands holding his legs, feeling my body slip by his, I'm close I know he knows, he feels my body, he knows my body like no one else.

“Cum on my cock my little bitch! Now!” and with the order he gives I cum, strong, he lets go of my neck and holds the back of my neck making me turn to look into his eyes, he reaches my lips, kissing me Pedro swallows all my moans and screams of the spasm I just felt cumming with his cock inside me.

I start to close my legs, he growls and bites my lower lip, releasing my hair he holds my leg preventing me from closing them.

“Cum again I want to feel it” I don't know if my body can take it, but I want to give it everything he wants.

“Please please please” he lets go of my lips and holds the back of my neck, looking me in the eyes he says laughing:

“Fuck, you look so fucking sexy when you beg”

“Let's go into the hot tub, hottie” I say without strength due to the strong orgasm of seconds ago

_He wants more, I'll give it to him_

I get up feeling my legs tremble, I climb the step and sit on the edge, Pedro enters the bathtub and dives in, he crawls to me and with a movement he runs his hands on his hair fixing them, he crawls to me like a snake, he reaches the button behind me and turns on the hydromassage.

He drops his hands down my thighs to my knees, he makes me open my legs, he pushes me so that I'm almost lying down, approaching his face he begins to torture me, giving slow licks along with bites through the inside of my thighs, always looking into my eyes

“You gonna cum in my mouth now” he says and runs his tongue slowly through my clit, while whispering “Do you understand?” With his thumbs he opens my pussy to have a perfect angle, he sucks and pulls his lips, sticking his tongue in me as if it were his cock. He lifts one of my legs on his shoulder, leaving me more exposed.

I observe that his right hand goes back into the water, he's jerking off while sucking me, it's hard to keep my eyes open, I force my body to observe everything, I'm almost cumming and with weak moans I beg him to fuck me.

“You so dirty doing this” he looks at me with dark eyes and says with his mouth on my thigh distributing bites and hickeys.

“Do you want dirty?” no chance to answer he pulls me by the legs, making me scream with fright and fall into the water.

Pressing me against the wall of the bathtub he climbs a hand on my face, squeezing my cheeks making me open my mouth he spits on my tongue, waiting for me to swallow, then kissing me so hungry that I feel my lips hurt.

He kisses me and drags his lips to my ear to moan and growl my name.I accidentally scratch his back, he stop and says calmly:

“Don't do it bitch, otherwise you will regret it” he wraps his arm behind my head, making it my support, then he positions his cock in my pussy and slides inside me, I moan loudly, he puts his free hand over my lips and talks while punching me.

“Shut up you cunt hmmm” he fucks harder. The water following our movements, my mouth meets his again, I go towards his chin, his jaw, his beard scratching my face is too much for me.

Our bodies burned even in already cold water, it was as if we were able to set the room on fire at any time.

The touch of his hands on my body gives me goosebumps, it's so good, so soft but also so delirious.

He grabs my hips, pulling my body against his, his cock still buried inside me, pulsating feeling my pussy squeeze, feeling that hot pain.

His arms slide around my waist and lift me up and when I can tell, I'm out of the jacuzzi, sitting again on the edge. He gets up slowly, teasing me I can't divert my eyes from his body, the wet skin, the drops of water that run down his tummy until it drips to find his cock.

It can be the longing speaking or simply the Mediterranean air does it good, which I know is he is exhaling a sexuality that drives me crazy.

“What do you want now, huh?”

I ask while he offers his hand to me helping me get up

“We gonna wet the whole bed if we go there like this…”

“No problem babe” he says as he approaches me putting his hands on my waist, with his face almost glued to mine, forehead with forehead, his eyes never abandon me, this is something Pedro always has: eye contact.

“You can sleep with me in my room, in my bed.. if anyone see, i really don't care”

My body is taken by an excitement, I don't know if it's why he doesn't mind having me in his room, in a hotel full of actors and people who know him, or because of his cock that throbs against my stomach while I answer

“So in that case I think we have to take the risk” he smiles, that beautiful smile, he holds my hand and leads me to the bed, when we get to the foot of the bed I push him and make him lie down

“Oh.. so you want to be in control now? “ he says as he pulls a pillow under his head, giving a little smile

“show me what you want.. show me...”

I climb on top of him, one leg on each side of his hip, holding his cock I fit in my pussy and sit slowly, feeling him open me, centimeter by centimeter, this makes him release a slow moan with his eyes closed.

“Oh fuck... Your pussy is my weakness... My fucking weakness” he speaks as he opens his eyes and watches my pussy swallow him as I start riding, leaning my hands on his chest I feel his cock so deep in me that he touches my G-spot.

“Do you like it huh? Like it when your little bitch rides you” I can feel another orgasm forming on me, I take a hand off his chest and put two fingers in his mouth, Pedro sucks and then I drag the same hand to touch my clit, it makes him moan and slap my ass.

“I love to see you touching yourself babe... Fuck don't stop don't stop!”

I keep riding while I masturbate, our eyes are attached to each other my body begins to beg to cum, Pedro holds my hip so tightly that I know I will have marks to remember. He guides my movements, I'm close

“I'm gonna cum... please cum with me” I speak while grinding faster feeling my pleasure swallowing me “Please Pedro cum inside me...”

I cum on his cock and feel the hot jet of cum fill me, cumming next to me, moaning and saying disconnected words.

A few seconds pass and I'm still riding on him, trying to make my body obey and move, he looks at me and laughs.

Pedro pulls me and kisses me, in fact two desperate mouths hitting each other, uncontrolled tongues, bites and sighs.

He interrupts the kiss and holds my neck, fingers rubbing the sweaty skin, he can feel the pulsating vein of my neck, he slides until he curls his fingers on the back of my neck, holding a handful of hair between his fingers, he pulls back, making my face stand up to him, looking into my eyes he speaks calmly and slowly

“Get on your knees... I'm not done with you yet” I get up from the bed soon he gets up and holds my hair forcing me down I feel the icy floor hitting my knees that contrast of the cold with my indented body, I look at him, imposing looking at me from above, like a Greek god, he has his cock pointing at my face, his sweaty red chest, his hair sticking to his forehead the irregular breathing, his lips half-open looking for fresh air.

“Come on, walk like a good daddy's dog that you are babe” he says that and pushes me to get on all fours on the floor, crawl for a few meters, he holding my hair as if it were a leash, he pulls me and making me stop walking, I sit on my heels and look into his eyes, my hands walk through his thighs, my eyes show all the horniness I'm feeling, they talk more than my own mouth would be able to say.

“Suck very very slowly... you understood?I want you to taste me again” I nod my head confirming, licking my lips when I see his cock getting hard again so close.

_God, should be a crime for him to be so hot_

He holds his cock by the base and rubs it on my face, wetting with pre cum, hitting my mouth teasing me.

I open my lips, I put my tongue out and it sticks to the bottom of my throat, I choke a little but I don't push it away, without cutting the eye contact my nails stick in his thighs, as if they were my life-saving boat, the air that my lungs need.

“Yeah babe like that slowly...” he moans and throws his head back, both hands tangled in my hair, holding a ponytail he guides my mouth the way he wants to fuck.

Pedro moves his hands away from my head and I see that he takes a bottle of champagne, he leans a little back and pours champagne down his body, soon I feel the alcohol trail coming into contact with my lips and his cock, making it a unique and extremely dangerous flavor.

“Do you like to swallow me like that bitch? Huh? Swallow it all” he pours more champagne and I swallow everything I can, push my lips away and keep sucking only the head of his dick, sucking hard and stroking him. My eyes never abandon his, he takes a few sips of champagne, the sight of him standing, wet with champagne while drinking straight from the bottle is suffocating, I put my left hand in my pussy and play with my clit, I want to cum admiring him, I want to give him an orgasm just with his cock in my mouth.

I suck his balls, one of each, feeling them contrairem on my tongue, he moans more when I do that. So I swallow him again, wrapping my tongue to the base and sticking it deep in my throat

“Fuck, that's what I want... Touch yourself for me, you cum on your fingers while swallowing my hot cum... Do you want that hot cum in the back of your throat?” I don't answer, I just stick his cock up to my throat and suck hard, with quick movements, my fingers circling my clit hard, I feel his cock pulse and then 4 jets of hot cum go down my throat, mixing with the champagne that was still present on my tongue.

I cum with him, feeling my pussy pulsate.

“Ohhh fuck you... Ahhh babe yeah like that... Fucking bitch”

When he starts having spasms of pleasure I take him out of his mouth, looking into his eyes and making the best whore face, I run my index finger through my lips and suck, showing him that I didn't let any drop of cum be wasted.

Pedro pulls me by the hair, holding my neck tightly and kisses me, not caring about feeling his own taste, he kisses me and holds my hand, interrupting the kiss but without diverting his eyes from mine, he licks my fingers and bites gently.

“Damn...you gonna kill me…”

I laugh and sink my face into his neck, the smell of sweat, sex and skin is intoxicating, I lick the salty taste of his skin and kiss his jaw

“Babe... let's go to the jacuzzi now.. relax?”

He smiles and take me to the jacuzzi, we already know where this will probably end.

—————————————

Thanks for being here and read our delusional fics, likes are appreciate, comments even more. If you want to ask anything, blast it!

[scmg11]

KATE BISHOP x READER

Maybe your heart isn’t made of plastic

Summary: Y/N always considered high school an hellhole where you need to fight everyday to survive, especially when Kate Bishop ruled over everything and everyone adored her. Everyone except her. She hated her. So she just tried to lay low and mind her own business, but when a new student arrive at their school, madness follows.

After a revenge plan, everything falling apart and just overall chaos, Y/N hooked up with none other than Kate Bishop. And it just kept happening. The two started hooking up wherever they had the chance and old feelings start to resurface. But would things work out or they would fall apart eventually?

[I got inspired after watching the new Mean Girls movie and after writing a too long oneshot about an original story with Kate, so I decided to create a book.]

-

A/N: HELLO HELLO HELLO BEAUTIFUL PEOPLE!

I am here with a brand new book for you! Someone may already know that I got inspired by the new Mean Girls movie and wrote a 27k long oneshot before deciding to create a book and split it into multiple chapters.

This first chapter just go through the movie to introduce chapters and a bit of the background story, but the real story will start in the next chapter, so- STAY TUNED!

I pretty much have the whole book already written so you guys don't have to wait too much for updates (even if I will be busy with updating my Hailee imagines book too).

As always, let me know what you guys think, it's really important your opinion to me ❤️

Oh I almost forgot, this book is pretty much all smut. So read at your own risk 😉.

Sending you guys love ❤️

-

Chapter 1

Y/N trudged to her locker on a too sunny Monday morning, almost dragging her feet across the school’s hallways with a big scowl on her face, "morning little flower- damn you are glowing today, sweety. Stop that or you’re gonna lit the whole school on fire."

"Very, very, very funny." Y/N turned around to face her best friend with an unimpressed face and found him wearing a teasing grin as he laid his shoulder on the locker beside hers and crossed his arms, "wow, today you’re screaming gay more than ever." Y/N stated after giving her best friend a once over, taking his rainbow t-shirt in and rolling her eyes, then focusing her attention back in her locker to grab her book for her first class.

"Uh-uh, who the hell peed in your Cheerios this morning?"

"Kate Bishop." Y/N growled under her breath after grabbing her book and accentuated her anger by slamming her locker close harshly. "Speaking of the Devil." Y/N rolled her eyes when she saw Kate Bishop strolling down the hallway alongside her friends with her signature smirk on her lips, catching everyone’s attention as their eyes followed them, including Y/N’s ones.

"Oh hey, Y/N. I’m sorry for earlier. I didn’t see you there." Kate spoke with a clearly, fake apologizing tone and didn’t bother to listen to Y/N’s comeback before resuming her walk to presumably her first class, giggling alongside her friends.

"What a fucking bitch." Y/N shook her head while eyeing the back of Kate’s head, not realizing her best friend was giving her a pitying gaze.

"What did she do, now?"

"She almost ran me over with her car." Y/N turned around to face her best friend with anger boiling under her skin, her hands clenching around her book as she hugged it hard to her chest.

"What a fucking bitch." Y/N laughed when her best friend repeated her words and shook her head, relaxing right away and bumping her shoulder with the side of his bicep. She was too short to aim for his shoulder.

"Thank you Buck. You always know what to say to cheer me up."

"Oh honey, you know I do."

-

"Good morning, I would like to introduce you to our new student. She is moving from Slovenia-."

"Sokovia." The red haired girl corrected the principal with a shy smile, her awkward smile settling back on the class staring at her bored.

"Sokovia. Right, hm- welcome Wendy!"

"Oh, it’s Wanda."

"My apologies, Wanda." The redhead nodded once at the apologetic man before meeting everyone’s eyes with an anxious grimace on her lips, but luckily her new teacher pulled her out of her mercy when no one said a thing for a few moments.

"Okay, Wanda take your seat, let’s start the lesson." The blonde pointed to the only empty seat in the room and the girl immediately sauntered to it to sit down.

"Hey." The redhead smiled politely to two of her classmates staring at her with wide smiles, a little bit uncomfortable with their unrelenting gazes giving her a once over.

"Hello, fresh meat." Bucky was the first to speak up, sending Wanda a friendly wave before the other girl, with green ends on her hair did the same.

"Hey Wendy. Welcome to the jungle that is our school."

-

"Hey- HEY! Are you even listening to me?" Bucky punched Y/N’s shoulder when he noticed the girl was trying to balance a chicken nugget on her nose instead of focusing on him rambling about whatever he was telling her, making the nugget fall onto the ground and finally catching Y/N’s attention.

"Yeah, yeah sure. You were talking about something extremely important." Y/N nodded seriously and completely ignored the nugget falling on the ground and sliding a few feet away from their table, moving her attention on a frowning Bucky instead and pretended to not notice a guy stepping on it.

"I was trying to ask you- have you seen the new girl? She ran away."

Y/N shrugged nonchalantly, stabbing some pasta on her fork and chewing on it, all the while Bucky’s eyes never moved from her, staring at her intently. She bit down on her bottom lip at her stomach churning with pity for the new girl and sighed out with an excessive roll of her eyes when her eyes caught Bucky’s pleading ones, already sitting up from the bench, "alright, let’s go rescue her."

Y/N totally ignored Bucky celebrating with a soft squeal and walked out of the room, knowing he was following her. She flipped some dude off that slammed into her on his way to the cafeteria before making her way towards the bathrooms, where she knew the girl was hiding. They smiled politely at a girl walking out and fled in the bathrooms, Y/N crouching down to look under the stalls to locate the redhead and finding her in the middle one, silently pointing at Bucky with her head, who nodded and knocked gently on the door, "hey- everything okay?" She asked with a slightly worried tone and leaned on the first stall’s frame, waiting for the girl to answer. She took a glance at Bucky and found him checking himself out in the mirror and rolled her eyes good-naturedly with a fond, exasperated smile on her lips.

"Yeah." The stall door opened a few moments later and Wanda, with her tray in her hands, appeared, looking a bit uncomfortable and confused but smiled awkwardly at the two best friends nonetheless.

"Rough first day?"

"I don’t know, should it be? I am not used to this."

"What do you mean?" Y/N asked as she grabbed Wanda’s empty tray and threw it in the trash can, waving Bucky off when he looked at her outraged at her gesture, before crossing her arms and lying her butt on the sink behind her, staring at Wanda curiously.

"I was homeschooled."

"Oh that’s so cool!" Bucky exclaimed with an envy, dreamy glint in his eyes as he stared at Wanda, but when Y/N slapped his arm gently he came back to his senses, "so this means you need two guides to help you deal with this shit hole."

"I guess?" Wanda asked more than stated and Y/N already started to like her. She seemed so naive.

"Let’s go. Your first lesson starts now." Y/N signaled for Wanda to follow her as she was already halfway out of the bathroom, Bucky pushing the redhead to move and then followed the two girls out of the bathroom, strolling back into the cafeteria. "Alright- hm, high school is essentially a jungle where if you don’t know how to survive you will be eat alive for sure. That’s why finding a place to belong to is vital. You can choose from the bitchy theater guys, the horny musicians, the dumb jocks, the stoners and the nerdy science guys. Do you feel like you already belong to one of these groups?" Y/N looked at Wanda expectantly after pointing to all the groups sat in the cafeteria, grimacing when her eyes fell on a nerd picking his nose nonchalantly.

"Not really." Wanda shook her head, her face scrunching up in distress as she assessed all the people in the room before looking at Y/N expectantly, "hey, I can hung out with you guys."

Y/N and Bucky shared a quick glance with wide smiles on their lips and nodded eagerly, "it’s fine by us." Bucky shrugged with a wide, excited smile, patting Wanda’s shoulder gently.

"But we need to warn you, we are too cool for this school. Are you sure you can handle all this popularity?" Y/N joked and was glad Wanda caught on it too as she giggled and nodded. Suddenly the chatter in the cafeteria stopped as its doors opened and three girls entered the room.

"Who are they?"

"Oh no, no, no." Y/N shook her head and turned around, pushing Wanda to do the same.

"Do not look them in their eyes!" Bucky whisper-yelled as he covered his eyes dramatically, but Wanda felt like she was frozen in her spot as she watched the trio stroll to the only empty table in the room.

"They are what we like to call them, the plastics. ‘Cause they’re shiny, fake and hard." Y/N explained, finishing with a scoff and a roll of her eyes. "The one on the left is Cassie Lang, she knows everything about everyone. The one on the right is Natasha Romanoff, her parents are famous scientists. She is so good in martial arts I think she might be a spy or something. And the one in the middle is Kate Bishop. Lacrosse team captain and a state archery champion. She is the Queen Bee. She controls the whole school. Everyone is afraid of her." When Y/N noticed Wanda kept staring at the trio now sitting down, Y/N slapped her gently on her shoulder and whispered, "Wanda, do not look or-."

"Hey, you." A voice echoed around the room as chatter slowly started again, Wanda furrowing her eyebrows and pointing at herself confusedly, "yeah, you. Come here."

"No, Wanda!" Y/N tried to grab Wanda’s arm and stop her from walking towards the black haired girl, but she slipped out of her reach and Y/N cursed under her breath as she watched the redhead walk towards the plastics. "Shit."

-

"What did they tell you?" Y/N asked as soon as Wanda joined them at the cafeteria entrance, the three of them walking down the stairs to go to their shared class after lunch time finished.

"They seem nice. They asked me to sit down with them this week."

"Are you serious?" Y/N asked confused, furrowing her eyebrows and looking at Wanda curiously, stopping in her tracks before she could walk down the stairs.

"Yeah. I don’t know why you two hate them. Kate seems so cool."

"What? No, no, no. Wanda- Kate Bishop is not cool. Kate Bishop is a scum-sucking life ruiner. She is heartless and a master bitch." Y/N nodded firmly when Bucky did the same to her.

"Yeah, Wan. In middle school, Kate told everyone Y/N is-."

"BUCK! Please, let’s move on. I have a plan. You are going to hung out with the plastics and then you’re gonna tell us all the stupid things they say."

"What? You mean spy on them?"

"No. It’s not spying. It’ll be fun!"

"Are you sure? I don’t-." Y/N sighed out imperceptibly and smiled widely at Wanda, leaning her arms on the handrail and then placing her head on them, batting her puppy dog eyes at the redhead.

"You won’t spy on them, we are only going to have fun too." Y/N pushed on and broadened her smile even more, hoping Wanda would give in, which she did a few moments later.

"Okay. I will."

"Yes!" Y/N and Bucky let out in unison to celebrate, before both lifted their hands up to high-five a laughing Wanda. They resumed their walk down the stairs but after a few steps Wanda stopped her friends with worry in her eyes.

"Do you guys have anything with pink I can borrow from you?"

Y/N scoffed outrageously at Wanda and looked at her like she just asked her the most offensive thing in her world, "no."

"Yeah! What shade?" Y/N couldn’t help herself and emit a small snort at Bucky’s enthusiasm, opening their Biology class door and walking in.

-

"And I’m telling you- Miss Harkness has a big stick up her ass." Bucky scoffed and grunted, closing his locker forcefully, eliciting a soft chuckle for his best friend.

"She does not. I find her funny."

"Just because you have a bigger stick up your ass." Y/N laughed heartily at Bucky’s comeback, leaning her back and head on the lockers before getting ready to deliver a witty counter back, that, sadly, never left her mouth.

"Why don’t you try to take it out? We won’t have to worry about things catching fire all the time." Kate walked by the two best friends with Cassie and Natasha on her trail, laughing at her own joke and subsequently making Cassie and Natasha join her with loud cackles too.

"Oh yeah. Hold on- do you want me to take yours out first?" Y/N smiled politely at Kate, leveling her with a challenging look and lifting her right eyebrow up a moment later, but the plastic just scoffed and walked away. "Bitch." Y/N murmured as she closed her eyes to calm herself down, but her peace was short lived when Wanda came sauntering towards them with a big smile on her face. "Oh no, too much happiness for this hellish environment."

"Sorry, I just- I met a guy in my Calculus class."

"Wow, calculus. You’re smart." Y/N nodded at Y/N in surprise, lifting herself off the lockers to walk out of school.

"Why are you taking that class? Are you trying to punish yourself for something bad you did?" Bucky asked alarmed, eyeing Wanda like she just grew two heads.

"No, I’m pretty good at math."

"Oh, honey, I’m so sorry for you." Wanda shook her head with a small smile at Bucky and shrugged, "anyway, let’s talk about the juicy stuff- who is he?"

"Travis Jarvis."

"What?! No, that’s a big no." Y/N shook her head alarmed, stopping Wanda before she could keep walking and looking into her eyes in warning. "You need to stay away from him."

"Why?"

"He is Kate’s ex boyfriend." Bucky clarified and Y/N nodded in affirmation, Wanda’s frown only deepening.

"Okay? They broke up, right? I can-."

"No. You can’t do anything. He was her property and you can’t touch what was hers."

"But-."

"No, honey. She will eat you alive. You are the prey and she is the predator."

"The apex predator." Y/N clarified, eyeing Kate talking with Cassie and Natasha in the parking lot.

"You guys are just exaggerating."

"Oh no, we’re not." Bucky shook her head with widened eyes, fear glinting into his irises.

"Someone touched Kate’s lacrosse stick in the locker room last year. That poor girl got transferred. To Europe." Y/N watched Wanda swallow visibly and tried to reassure her, feeling pity at her frightened expression, "if you really want to do this, we will support you, but Kate won’t have to find out." They resumed their walk out of the school but before they reached the big doors, they parted ways to not rise suspicions from the plastics.

-

"And they have this book, this ‘Burn Book’, where they write mean things about all the girls in our school."

"Wait- ooh- ooh- what does it say about me?"

"You- you’re not in it." Wanda lied and looked down at her hands.

"What? Those bitches." Y/N exclaimed outraged, Bucky chuckling from the couch in Y/N’s garage.

"She gave me a pair of shoes for me to wear."

"Oh, show me!" Bucky got up from the couch in a second and pushed Y/N out of the way as he run towards Wanda, making her fall on the couch with a fond, exasperated chuckle.

-

"Hey guys, what are you gonna wear to the Halloween party this Friday?" Wanda asked curiously, catching her two friend’s attention from their textbooks. Like every other Wednesday afternoon, they were studying at Y/N’s house, the only day Wanda would hung out with them since Kate had her archery practice, but that question plagued her mind and prevented her to focus on her homework.

"Nothing. We’re not going." Y/N stated simply, focusing her attention back on her textbook.

"Why?" Y/N sighed quietly under her breath at the question and gave up doing her homework for now.

"Because we’re not invited. The plastics never invite us to parties."

"But screw them, we have so many funny activities Friday night." Bucky smiled and nodded at Y/N, who smirked back at her friend knowingly.

"Don’t look at us that way. We’re not sneaking in their parties. A nerd from the science group sneaked into one of their party once. We don’t actually know what the plastics did to him, but he didn’t show up at school for a month and he refused to tell what happened that night." Y/N shrugged and flipped a page over on her book.

"I claim that he got tied to a chair in Kate’s garage and they frightened him for life." Bucky butted in and lifted his hand up, but then placed it on his chest and looked at Wanda in sympathy, thinking back to that guy.

"But it’s fine. Go to that stupid party. You will tell us what happened on Monday."

-

Y/N and Bucky were in the middle of their scary movies marathon, watching a scary movie they hadn’t had the chance to see yet and chewing on popcorn from time to time. "He is gonna catch her, you see." Y/N stated with a knowing voice as she grabbed a few kettle corns to eat.

"Shhh." Y/N and Bucky had their eyes glued on the screen, waiting for the jump scare to happen but they relaxed as soon the woman in the movie did too, as nothing happened. About 3 seconds passed before the two best friends jumped up in fright when the monster caught the woman in the movie a moment later, before jumping up from the couch again in fear a second later while screaming at the top of their lungs when someone opened abruptly Y/N’s garage door, making Y/N threw the popcorn at them.

"Holy fucking shit! Wanda!"

"Sorry." The redhead closed the garage door and trudged into the room with tears running down her face, sniffling under her breath and looking at her friends in sorrow.

"What happened?" Bucky immediately sat up and guided Wanda, with her makeup now ruined by her tears, on the couch.

"She kissed him. In front of me. She told me she was gonna talk to him for me but then she kissed him." Wanda explained after she calmed down from the hiccups, a few tears escaping her eyes again as she explained to Y/N and Bucky, making the two best friends look at her pitifully.

"That’s who Kate Bishop really is. A fucking egocentric cunt." Y/N stated after Wanda finished speaking, looking in the distance with an anger glint burning behind her eyes.

"Now I see why you hate her so much." Wanda lifted her head up and looked at Y/N in her eyes.

"Because that’s what she always does. When we were in middle school, she told everyone Y/N is-."

"BUCK! Not now."

"No, I know the story. You were in love with Kate and you burned her backpack when she didn’t feel the way." Wanda explained as she wiped her tears with the back of her hand, smiling gratefully at Y/N when she offered her a Kleenex. "Thank you."

"That’s what she said? Really?" Y/N asked outraged with fire burning behind her eyes, scoffing and lifting her legs up on the couch to hug them closely when Wanda nodded tentatively.

"That’s not what happened. Let me explain it to you." Bucky sat up and grabbed a box under a drawer and placed it on the coffee table. "With dolls."

"Ugh, Buck, can you not?"

"She deserves to know the truth!" Bucky countered back to Y/N sternly, eyeing Y/N hard and lifted the top of the box only when Y/N sighed out dejected and hugged her knees closer, resigned to listening to Bucky explain the story, "Y/N and Kate used to be best friends in middle school."

"What?"

"I know, right? Shocking! Anyway, they were inseparable. One day, they gave each other these friendship pets and Y/N put this pin on hers to come out to Kate." Bucky pointed to the rainbow pin on the fluffy pet, "Kate was happy Y/N came out to her and put the same pin on hers for support, because- she used to be human." Bucky stated, making Y/N smile at his joke, "a few days later, Kate confessed to Y/N she liked a boy in their class named Kyle. Y/N, of course, supported her- they were best friends. They went to a party and when it was time for the spin the bottle game, Kate was afraid Kyle liked Y/N more, so when he spun the bottle and it landed on Y/N, Kate kissed Y/N in front of everyone abruptly and then brushed it off saying things like ‘I knew she would let me kiss her, because she is a dyke and completely obsessed with me’." Y/N rolled her eyes when Bucky tried to imitate Kate and making the two dolls he had in his hands kiss, but didn’t interrupt him, eyeing Wanda quickly and finding her completely focused on Bucky, "they had a really bad fight and stopped talking. But Kate, the bitch that she is, brought that pet everywhere she went. Y/N heard her making everyone say hi to the pet and call it Sissy Liz, that was a code name for ‘obsessed lesbian’. She was basically making fun of Y/N and everyone knew except Y/N. So during chemistry class she lit that pet on fire to get rid of it. Kate’s backpack caught slightly on fire and Y/N got expelled."

"So when you got home you couldn’t explain why." Wanda finished with a pensive tone, already looking at Y/N in sympathy as all the pieces of the story fell onto place.

"Yeah. And Kate got away with it." Bucky finished with his story and placed everything back in the box, scoffing under his breath.

"I’m so sorry you went through all of that."

"It’s in the past now, Wan. But now you see Kate for who she really is. Now you know she is not your friend. We are your friends. And we’re gonna make her pay."

"That bitch deserves a lesson." Bucky butted in and high-fived Y/N, while Wanda looked at the two confused.

"Yeah, do you want your happy ending with Vis?" Wanda nodded, her eyes already filling up with tears as the image of Kate kissing him in front of her appeared in her mind, "then we’re gonna have a fucking revenge party." Y/N smirked widely at her friends before sprinting to her laptop to start working, while Wanda and Bucky decided to watch a movie. About an hour later she hung a white sheet on the wall, turned on her projector and cleared her throat to grab her friend’s attention. Bucky stopped the movie and both Bucky and Wanda looked over at Y/N’s presentation while Y/N stood beside it with a focused frown on, "so, here’s the plan. We need to take Kate from off her throne. Targeting all the things around her she cares the most. First thing first. Her perfect body." Y/N pointed to the first point on her PowerPoint projection, making both Wanda and Bucky look at her weirdly for how much effort she put on that presentation.

"Wow, talk about dedication." Bucky joked but Y/N waved him off and continued.

"Then putting her best friends against her. And last but not less important, making Vis dump her. Questions?" Y/N looked at her small audience and lifted her right eyebrow up in question, pointing at Bucky, who lifted his hand up.

"You remind me of my first grade teacher. She looked like Satan." Bucky snickered at his own joke and at Y/N staring at him unamused. A few seconds later Y/N grabbed the first thing she had within her reach and threw it at him. "Ohw! Throwing your tubes of paint at me is not nice."

"You should be glad it wasn’t an hammer." Y/N deadpanned with an hard stare directed at Bucky and lifted an eyebrow up defiantly. A few seconds of silence wrapped around them into the garage before the three of them let out loud cackles.

"I have a question." Wanda lifted her hand up after she calmed down and waited for Y/N’s full attention, who nodded after wiping away a few tears that escaped her eyes, "do we have to do these things in succession or-."

"Not really. But I think destroying her perfect image would be the logical thing to do first." Y/N shrugged, turning her head around and staring at the words projected on the sheet as a pensive frown rolled over her features.

"It would definitely make her go mad. Turning her friends against her would definitely come subsequently." Bucky added with a small nod as he leaned back on the couch and stretched his arms over the top of it.

"But how can we do that?" Y/N furrowed her eyebrows pensively and stroked her chin gently, wracking her brain for a good idea to start with their plan. The three teenagers spent about 5 minutes thinking in silence, all staring into space and humming from time to time as they discarded a few ideas. Suddenly Y/N sat up from the coffee table and lifted her hand up in victory. "I got it. Okay- this Thursday we have that stupid celebration for her win as the Spring Fling Queen last year. We can start with that."

"Where is the celebration?" Wanda asked, still getting used to all these school activities.

"On the football field." Bucky explained to Wanda when Y/N didn’t answer right away as she stared at the ground, thinking over a plan of action.

"Oh I got it! Oh this will be amazing- we are gonna fucking hit her with hydrants and drench her in front of the whole school. She will be furious." Y/N explained out loud happily, proud for coming up with that idea.

"Oh I would definitely cry in front of everyone." Bucky nodded with fear in his eyes, looking into space as he probably imagined the scene, and Y/N rolled her eyes good-naturedly at her friend.

-

"How the fuck is that possible? We splashed water into her fucking face and she transformed into a model? I had my feed full of Kate stroking her boobs with that stupid sexy face. And she even created a new trend. Are you fucking kidding me? Ugh." Y/N punched Bucky’s locker in frustration before leaning her forehead on it, making her best friend gasp at her.

"Hey! Don’t hate on my locker."

"I’m sorry. But our plan had a really shit start. We only made her more popular." Y/N lifted her head up to stare at her best friend in apology before leaning her forehead back on the cold surface with another frustrated groan and closing her eyes to calm her nerves but a rustling sound of paper beside her ear made her lift her head back up and meet Wanda’s eyes instead, eyeing the bar she was eating. "What’s that?"

"Oh, that’s actually my lunch. I need to study before my test, that will be after lunch. I don’t have time to eat so I’m using this bar that my mom used to give to people in need in Sokovia. It helps you ingest all kind of nutrients and vitamins. She gave it to people starving to help them gain weight fast." Y/N was certain that if she was in a cartoon a lightbulb would’ve appeared on top of her head and lighted up as a devilish idea popped into her head.

"Wan, I think you gave us inspiration for step 2 of our plan." Wanda stared at Y/N’s face erupting in a big, mischievous grin and stared at her in confusion, waiting for her to clarify. "You’re gonna make Kate believe these things are used to loose weight in Sokovia instead. In no time she will have to say goodbye to her perfect body."

"Damn girl, I love when you’re such a dick." Bucky chuckled and bumped his shoulder with Y/N’s one, who just shrugged with a fake humble smile before chuckling evilly under her breath.

-

"Holy shit! Kate just bumped into me on her way to class. I was so shocked I didn’t even register her calling me an idiot. Shit- those bars are starting to work." Y/N sat down in her chair in class and sighed when it luckily didn’t start yet, meeting Wanda’s and Bucky’s eyes with her own widened in bewilderment.

"Yeah, I noticed it too this morning in the parking lot." Bucky nodded with a proud smile, winking at Y/N mischievously.

"Yeah. Yesterday she was so pissed-off she yelled at Natasha and Cassie all the time. Cassie is afraid she hadn’t ‘crapped’ in two weeks." Wanda grimaced in worry and recalled how brutal Kate was being with her best friends the days prior.

"Perfect. That’s just perfect. She is starting to crumble!"

-

"Buck stop trying to set me up with that girl in your class. I’m not interested." Y/N repeated for the umpteenth time to her best friend as she closed her locker, groaning in frustration when he tried to protest, again.

"I would be surprised if she is interested in you." Kate scoffed as appeared from behind Y/N and snickered at her own joke, making her three friends that followed her around do the same. Y/N fleetingly met Wanda’s eyes over Cassie’s shoulder before moving her eyes onto Kate, staring at her proudly of her insult. She took a deep breath to calm herself down.

"Well, I guess you definitely need to pull a surprised face. I like to people. You’re not the only one good with her mouth in our school." Y/N countered back cheekily, lifting her eyebrow up in challenge as an evil smirk appeared on her lips. She could swear she saw Kate blush, but her angry brain was definitely pulling jokes on her.

"Pft, bullshit."

"Wanna test it out?" Kate imperceptibly faltered in her stance as she swallowed quickly, but Y/N didn’t notice it.

"Y’know what I think? I think you only like to show off with your mouth. I think you only use it for selling bullshit." And with that Kate walked away, purposefully slamming into Y/N and making her hit her back on the lockers behind her, as her friends followed behind her. Wanda sent an apologetic smile at Y/N as she passed by her before stopping abruptly to prevent to fall into Natasha. The plastics suddenly stopped and Wanda lifted her head up to look what was happening and her heart fell down at her feet when she watched Kate and Travis kiss in front of her. "Hm, hey babe. You should push your hair back like this." Wanda watched as Kate slipped her fingers in Travis’ hair and pulled them back, a gesture that Wanda was sure was overly sexual to spite her, "Wanda, tell him her looks better with his hair pushed back."

Wanda swallowed the jealousy she felt bubbling up in her throat and, after taking a calming breath, spoke up with a blank stare, "you look better with your hair pushed back."

With that Kate walked with Travis, Natasha and Cassie out of the school, while Wanda stayed back to catch up with Y/N and Bucky. "What a fucking cunt." Y/N exclaimed, pulling Wanda’s eyes away from the door Kate and Travis just walked out and nod at her in agreement.

"She’s such an asshole."

"We need to hit harder. Cassie is the next one. We need to put her best friends against her."

"I can’t. She is too fragile." Wanda countered back with a sad expression on her face and Y/N sighed out disappointed.

"Dude, she just forced you to compliment Travis when she knows you like him. We need to hit hard. You will end up with Travis as soon as she is off her throne."

"I’ll end up with Travis as soon as she is off her throne." Wanda repeated with a dreamy expression and Y/N grinned widely at her as she started to give in.

"Yes bitch."

"Okay, let’s do it."

-

"Guys, it worked. Cassie told me a lot of Kate’s secrets. Did you know last year she convinced a girl from the opposite team to not wear her underwear during a game and while they were playing she pushed her pants down and made her flash her intimate parts to thousands of people just to score?"

"That would be something Kate would do, yeah." Bucky nodded after imagining it in his mind, sipping on his tea gently.

"As much as despicable that was, we don’t need it. Anything else we can use against her?"

"She is cheating on Travis. With Ryan Perrick. Every Tuesday and Thursday in the janitor’s closet." Wanda spoke right away, not even thinking about anything else Cassie told her in the school’s bathrooms.

"What? Holy shit, that’s perfect! This way our plan will be over. You’ll see." Y/N grinned mischievously at Wanda as she clicked her cup with Bucky’s one.

"Oh and she also told me Kate is trying a new Japanese or something technique to have perfect skin. I thought it would’ve been useful."

"Yeah, it will definitely will. Buck go get that lard jar in my kitchen. We’re gonna give Kate some new, expensive Italian facial cream." Y/N spoke with a too sweet tone as her eyes lighted up enthusiastically, her best friend running into the kitchen as a snicker left his lips.

-

"The Queen Bee just got dethroned." Y/N stated with a delighted sigh after taking a seat in her History class, looking at Bucky with the same facial expression.

"Yeah."

"That’s what I call a perfect plan. Kate lost all her power." Y/N high-fived Bucky enthusiastically before eyeing Wanda weirdly as she applied lip gloss on her lips. She shrugged it off and smiled once again at the girl, "hey, are you free this weekend? My art exhibition is this Friday."

"This Friday? Oh no, I can’t. I have this thing with my family. We already have tickets. I’m so sorry." Wanda looked remorseful at Y/N for just a moment before she turned back around and continued touching up her makeup happily, looking herself through the small mirror in her hand.

"Yeah, you really look sorry." Y/N eyed Wanda and scoffed, shaking it off and looking at Bucky, who shrugged at her.

"Do you want to watch a movie tonight? We are watching another scary movie. I love watching Y/N pee herself from the fright." Y/N turned around in her seat and punched Bucky on his shoulder, who chuckled happily at his mocking, but Wanda kept staring at herself in her mirror, not looking at their friends once.

"Oh, I can’t tonight. I have plans with Cassie and Nat."

"But the plan is over." Y/N furrowed her eyebrows confused, but Wanda just shrugged as she sat up, Y/N and Bucky looking at her confused.

"I know, but I want to have fun with one last strike. I’ll see you tomorrow. Kisses."

Y/N and Bucky stared at Wanda appalled and watched her walk away, Bucky waving unconvinced at her before shrugging at each other as their professor showed up a moment later.

-

"Oh God."

"You dirty, little liar." Y/N exclaimed as she walked towards Wanda with fury burning behind her eyes.

"I’m sorry! I can explain."

"Explain what? That you forgot to invite us to your party?"

"You know I couldn’t invite you. I had to pretend to be a plastic."

"Hey, hon, this is not pretending anymore. You became a plastic too. Cold, shiny, hard plastic." Y/N scoffed with a roll of her eyes and went to walk away to join Bucky, waiting on his bike, but stopped and turned around to send a withering glare to Wanda, clearly not over with the conversation yet. "Did you have fun with your new awesome friends? Had some fantastic shots and just had a great overall time with each other’s awesomeness?" Y/N mocked Wanda with an overly sweet tone, watching as a frown appeared on her face, but she couldn’t care less if she hurt her. She was done with her shit.

"Y’know what? You made me do this shit for your own 8th grade personal revenge, do not blame me."

"Ah shit, at least me and Kate know we are mean. You only like to play the victim for your own good."

"You know what?! It’s not my fault you’re like in love with me or something." Bucky gasped loudly as he put his hand on his chest while Y/N froze on her spot with an annoyed expression on her face.

"Oh no, she did not."

"What?! You see, this is the problem with you plastics. You think everyone is in love with you when news flash baby, everyone HATES you. Including Vis, that after dumping Kate, he still doesn’t want you. You are a mean girl, just like Kate. Here." Y/N threw a rolled up paper to Wanda and walked away with a loud scoff, "you can have this. It won a prize."

"And I want my pink shirt back!"

-

The next day Y/N and Bucky strolled into what they couldn’t call a school anymore. People were fighting with papers scattered all over the floor and on the walls. They eyed in disbelief what was unfolding in front of them and dodged a few girls pulling at their hair as they finally arrived at Y/N’s locker, where a paper with a picture with her and Bucky was attached on it. Y/N picked it up with her eyebrows furrowed curiously before anger boiled under her skin at the words written under the picture, "Y/N, the pyro-lez?!"

"Bucky is too gay to function." Bucky read out loud and Y/N gasped outraged.

"Hey! I only can say that." Y/N slammed her hand with the paper on her thigh and assessed the caos that was still taking place in the hallway. Girls in the whole school were fighting. Two of them were slamming another one on the lockers on their right, other two were trying to punch another one in the face, one was trying to bite another girl on her ear. It was a mess. Bucky screeched loudly when a girl got thrown right beside him and he cowered behind Y/N, who rolled her eyes somewhat amused at his behavior. "There she is. The new Queen Bee." Y/N spoke purposefully out loud when Wanda walked beside her and both stared at Wanda hard, narrowing their eyes at her when she tried to wave at them, but the principal’s voice booming over the hallways interrupted her. Y/N noticed a smug Kate Bishop standing beside him with her arms crossed and she instantly knew this was all her fault.

"Every girl in the gym. NOW!"

-

"Okay, who’s next? Oh Y/N, go on." Y/N smiled at her teacher and walked up the makeshift stage, looking one more time at the paper with the apology she wrote on it and prepared to speak up.

"Oh this will be awesome. Maybe she will lit something on fire." Kate spoke up from the crowd, making everyone laugh at her joke, while Y/N bit the inside of her cheek and balled her paper up, throwing it on the ground.

"Okay, I have some apologies to make I guess. I have a new friend, she is a new student. And I convinced her it would’ve been fun messing up with Kate Bishop’s life. I had her pretend to be friends with her and then she would come to my house after so we could laugh about all the dumb things Kate said. Oh and we gave her some bars that would make her gain weight and then we turned her best friends against her. What else- oh yeah- and then Wanda- oh you know my friend Wanda, right?" Y/N pointed to the redhead on her left, making everyone stare at her a few moments before focusing her attention back on herself, "she told him Kate was cheating on him and then she convinced him to break up with her." The anger appearing on Kate’s face was the peak of Y/N’s week, but she kept going with a proud smirk on her lips, "oh and we switched lard for her face cream." Y/N chuckled softly under her breath, "but then it all went to shit because apparently Wanda is just like Kate Bishop. So the apologies are for me." Y/N flipped the bird to Kate and instead of falling into the crowd like everyone did before her, she hopped down the makeshift stage and walked out of the gym and out of the school, furrowing her eyebrows in confusion when she turned around and noticed everyone else was following her. Well not exactly her, but apparently Kate and Wanda fighting a few feet from her, also walking out of the school. She then exited the school and crossed the road to go to Bucky’s bike and wait for him there. She leaned her butt on his friend’s bike and watched Kate standing in the middle of the street fighting badly with Wanda but after a few moments everyone gasped loudly when they saw some stupid student run Kate over with his car.

-

Luckily Kate only suffered from a back and neck injury, but she was overly fine. Despite that, Y/N had to fight against her guilty feelings. If she didn’t let her hatred for what Kate did to her take over her, Kate wouldn’t have been run over by a car. She knew it was stupid thinking that, but she couldn’t help it. After a long chat with Bucky, he convinced her it wasn’t her fault. None of that was her fault. And luckily Kate was okay. They also stopped talking to Wanda, who went back to being ignored and eat in the bathroom, but the two best friends didn’t gave a shit about her. She was a bitch to them and she deserved it all. After a strangely calm month, the Spring Fling finally rolled over. Y/N had to endure a lot of convincing from Bucky, but after trying for the umpteenth time, she finally gave in and went with him as his plus one. She chose a purple suit that, as Bucky stated ‘hugged her in all the right places’, while Bucky chose a classic black one. "Damn Buck, you almost look straight tonight."

"Bitch, you know I will never be. Here put the flower you so nicely gifted me in my pocket."

"You are supposed to do it to me, not the way around, dude." Y/N reasoned with a chuckle but grabbed the white rose from Bucky’s hands nonetheless and did what he asked her to, before smiling widely when he pulled another white rose from behind his back and placed it in her suit pocket too.

"Let‘s go break some hearts." Y/N laughed heartily at Bucky’s joke and let him pull her out of his house and into his car, jamming to loud songs as they drove towards their school.

"Holy shit."

The party was already in full swing when they entered the gym, now all decorated for the Spring Fling, and Y/N and Bucky stopped at the entrance to take over the room, their eyes watching people dancing on the floor, drinking at the tables or smoking under the bleachers. "Do you want something to drink?"

"Are you kidding me? There’s no way I’m going through this hell without being drunk." Y/N deadpanned with a serious, almost scared face, causing a small laugh to escape Bucky’s lips before he shook his head and pushed her towards the table where punch was on.

-

Wanda, after making up with Bucky, let him lead her to Y/N, finding her dancing with a few guys and girls from the A.V. Club. She watched her a few moments before taking a big, grounding breath and then tapped on Y/N’s shoulder, watching her turn around and noticing she still had the piece of crown she threw at her after winning in her hand, and with an hopeful tone she asked, "so- friends?" She batted her big doe eyes at Y/N and patiently waited for Y/N’s answer.

"I don’t know, are you still a bitch?"

"No." Wanda smiled softly at the girl and immediately shook her head, her gesture making a small grin grow on Y/N’s stoic face too, instantly calming her nerves down.

"Then we’re cool. C’mere." Y/N chuckled and circled her arms around Wanda, hugging her close for a few moments.

"I don’t know how is that possible, but Kate apologized too, in some twisted and confused way in the bathroom." Wanda told Y/N with a still perplexed expression, her mind still reeling from that moment.

"Oh really? I would’ve loved to witness it. Where is Vis?"

"It didn’t workout. He is with a girl from his science class now." Wanda told Y/N with a resigned shrug and Y/N caressed her shoulder gently in apology.

"Oh I’m so sorry." Bucky butted in, caressing Wanda’s shoulder too, who smiled at her friends gratefully.

"It doesn’t matter."

"We can always make up a plan to make him pay." Y/N joked, giggling at Wanda when she widened her eyes and shook her head furiously.

"No, no, no, no. I’m done with revenge."

"That’s fair." Y/N nodded still giggling and circled her arm around Wanda’s shoulders, Bucky hugging her torso from the other side.

"Besides, I already forgot about him. I just want to have fun with my friends tonight."

"That‘s it, bitch. Let’s go have another drink." Y/N smiled widely and pushed them to the table where all the drinks were, but Bucky stopped her and pulled her and Wanda to the dance floor instead.

"It can wait. Let’s go dance now, bitches!"

-

"No! I need to drink. Wanda is your dancing buddy from now on." Y/N chuckled as successfully sneaked away from Bucky’s hands and waved through the sea of people to finally walk towards the table where the spiked punch was, grabbed a red cup to fill and took a sip of the strong drink as she leaned her ass on a random table to catch some breath, not noticing she stopped at the table where Kate was sat in. "Hey." Y/N smiled awkwardly at the black haired girl staring at her just a few feet from her and waved at her with her free hand.

"Oh, hey Y/N!" Kate was definitely high from medications if her hooded eyes were anything to go by, and Y/N still smiled awkwardly at the plastic, watching as she blinked a few times into space before struggling to grab her fancy cup and trying to drink from it, only to huff out in frustration when her collar prevented her to.

Y/N sighed out loud and debated with herself for a few moments if she should help Kate or not. A few moments later she made up her mind. She wasn’t a monster. "Fuck it." Y/N whispered under her breath and sat up, walking over Kate and placing her red cup on the table before grabbing Kate’s glass from her hands and sliding gently between Kate’s slightly open legs to let her drink easily and prevent it to spill on Kate’s dress, "here, let me help you."

Kate stared at Y/N gratefully and drank softly from the cup, never moving her eyes away from Y/N. Y/N suppressed an entertained smile by biting on her bottom lip at Kate rolling her eyes slightly back in delight as she drank, "thank you."

Y/N nodded with a soft smile and stared into Kate’s blue eyes for just a moment then started to move away from her, but she just had the time to move to the side from Kate’s slightly open legs before two hands grabbed her waist and pushed her down, making her sit on Kate’s lap. "O-kay."

Y/N smiled awkwardly down at Kate, who stared back at her with a dopey smile while her arms circled around Y/N’s waist, making her gasp softly under her breath at the sudden gesture. "Hm, you smell nice."

Y/N tapped with the palm of her hand the top of Kate’s glass before moving it on top of Kate’s head and tapped her hair gently when Kate leaned her head as much as her collar allowed her to into Y/N’s neck and breathe her perfume in, an awkward smile stretching over Y/N’s lips, "thanks, I guess?"

"You look nice too. I love purple." Kate leaned her head slightly more into Y/N’s neck and hummed softly as she hugged her tightly.

"Kate, what is this?" Y/N couldn’t help but ask after staying awkwardly into Kate’s arms for a few seconds, staring at her seriously and almost regretted using an harsh tone when she noticed the vulnerability swirling into Kate’s blue eyes when she pulled away to stare into her own Y/E/C irises.

"It’s me missing my best friend. I’m sorry I treated you like shit. I really liked spending time with you."

"Kate, you’re high." Y/N shook her head to prevent her brain to fall for the girl’s games again, putting a metaphorical space between them. She wasn’t going to let Kate fuck her up again.

"Maybe. My pills make me like everyone. Can you believe I said I liked Lili’s dress? And she is wearing orange! Who the fuck likes orange?"

Y/N shook her head and breathed out a small laugh. Kate didn’t change so much. And she somehow loved it. "Are you okay?"

"My back hurts a bit, but with you here with me, I feel better."

"Okay, you are definitely so fucking high." Y/N stated with an amused laugh and looked at Kate when she pulled away to observe people dance distractedly. She found herself getting lost in taking Kate in, from her perfectly styled hair, to her light make up, then moving her eyes down her green dress and appreciating it hugging her body as it was starting to become lean and muscular again. Luckily, before she started ogling at her exposed chest, Kate’s voice pulled her out of her inappropriate daze.

"I wanna dance." Y/N sighed out happily when she moved her eyes away from Kate’s chest a moment before she met her eyes and smiled innocently at her, nodding slightly at her.

"Are you sure you can with-?" Y/N waved her hand around her head and neck to point to Kate’s collar situation, but the black haired girl just nodded slightly at her with the same dopey smile.

"Yeah, dummy. It’s here for a reason." Kate laughed loudly at her own joke that Y/N clearly missed but laughed unconvinced alongside her before widening her eyes comically when Kate patted her butt a few times, "get up, we’re dancing." Y/N sat up slowly as her mind still reeled for Kate’s gesture, so much lost in her head she just let Kate grab her hand and pull her towards the dance floor where Bucky and Wanda were still dancing. What the fuck?

"Look who finally decided to join us again! And she brought fresh meat!" Bucky exclaimed, screeching loudly when Kate went towards him and took his hand to dance. Y/N watched Bucky carefully spun her around before the two started dancing back to back in a someway funny way. It was weird watching Kate so care-free but Y/N liked it nonetheless.

"Y/N! C’mere!" Y/N widened her eyes comically when Kate pulled on her hand and turned her around quickly, making her slam her back on Kate’s front as her arms circled her waist.

"Kate- are you-?"

"Shut up and dance." Y/N swallowed the rest of her question as nodded, before swallowing once again at Kate moving her hips to the rhythm and occasionally hitting Y/N’s butt. Was she really grinding on her?

"Oh fuck it." Y/N exclaimed under her breath at her mind reeling and let herself go on the dance floor for once, thanking the alcohol in her system for that. After a few beats of dancing seductively with Kate, she grabbed Wanda’s hand when she stood in front of her and danced care-freely to the EDM music blasting loudly through the speakers in their gym.

[theerurishipper]

Welcome to me watching the Paris special, this time with commentary! I watched the special and wrote down everything here as I watched it and forgot to post it cause I'm a dumbass. Also, this is long asf, in fact, it's so long that I had to make a Part 2.

Okay here goes!

Ah, the Gabriel version of the theme. This really took me by surprise. It's fire tho.

Straight into the action, I like it.

Max and Markov aren't different people in this?

That's some entrance from Shady and Claw, really ups the stakes. Makes you wonder why Nino tried to fight them with a nerf gun.

Ubiquity is so pretty.

I might be the only one who liked the Gabe scene we got.

Feeling some nostalgia for the candy cane cosplay ngl.

And we get a good scene with Adrien and Plagg. I liked the advice Plagg gave about how not all destruction is bad. Neat.

Some Alya and Marinette. Marinette is going through some tough times and is in need of support, and Tikki takes this opportunity to escape from her and steal macaroons. No hate tho, you do you Tikki.

Though she does react to the people of Paris cheering for Ladybug. That was sweet.

Alya turns into Ubiquity, and then we get... Betterfly.

Betterfly? Seriously? Coulda just gone with Hesperia.

"I'm not sure there's anything to hope for from Ladybug." My poor baby!

Love the look of absolute confusion on Alya's face.

Hesperia's confusion about his evil counterpart is really funny ngl.

SHADYBUG

"There, you can have your boyfriend back~" love the delivery on that line lmao.

But also, CLAW NOIR

Not her just stealing his belt immediately.

Marinette hates Adrien Agreste. This truly is the reverse world.

But also, I love Claw Noir pretending to be his own fan to impress Shadybug.

Claw Noir sure does love using that Cataclysm.

For someone who just woke up to see her friend gone and a hole in the wall, Alya collected herself pretty damn quick. I would be freaking the fuck out in her position. Just another reason she's the best.

RIP Alya's phone. Gabe really did a number on you.

Shadybug makes a butterfly tracker, proving that she ain't no Gabe.

Hesperia is befuddled by our world, Part 2.

It's always gotta be the Eiffel Tower, doesn't it.

Claw Noir's pulling a Chat Blanc?? Hello??

Hesperia (I'm not gonna call him Betterfly) is apparently a gentleman. It's almost disturbing after 5 seasons of Gabe being the worst piece of shit to grace our screens.

I guess no matter the universe and moral alignment, it's Gabriel's fate to get beaten up by teenagers.

Not Tikki loredumping about parallel universes right now lmao

Times like this remind me that Tikki is, for all intents and purposes, a god.

"You'd die before I could ever explain all this to you," is actually a pretty valid (and disturbingly hilarious) justification for not having bothered to bring any of this up before.

The Supreme is someone I'd like to learn more about. I've narrowed the suspects down to either Fu or Su-Han. Watch it be Lila instead if we ever get that info.

I feel like the info about the timers is something we should have gotten way, way earlier. Like, a few seasons ago.

Ladybug's triumphant entrance!

"Whatever, pest." Queen.

I love Claw Noir's staff.

Shadybug took no prisoners at all.

CHAT NOIR

Destruction vibes, and right after that incident too.

Claw Noir is unhinged.

Claw Noir just fucking cataclysmed himself??? Guess Adrien is always gonna be self-destructive in every universe huh?

Welp, looks like Chat Noir is officially re-traumatized.

I want y'all to remember that this boy went through the whole special with a cataclysm wound on his person and did not falter once. Mad respect.

Chat Noir got tossed. Chat Blanc call back number 2.

Obsessed with the way Bryce Papenbrook pronounces "cockroach."

Finally, a villain who actually gets rid of the Lucky Charm. Hawkie, take notes.

"Who the cat are you?"

So Shadybug can create whatever Lucky Charm she wants, huh?

Someone's been listening to the fandom.

Not the time freezing lmfao

I don't like that Gabe is turning Adrien into an angel, even if this is a good version. Anyway, Chat Blanc call back 3.

"Kitty catty" "Later loser!" I love her.

Of course, not all bugs can fly.

He moved out of the way.

I fucking love Claw Noir so much you guys, he's so funny.

Well, he tried. Shadybug's just better than him ig.

Hesperia stores his butterfly in his cane. So it's just our Gabe that tries to keep multiple butterflies, I guess.

I think they should kiss.

So they're doing this in hopes that The Supreme spares them? Interesting, and pretty sad.

They're so scared of the Akuma lmfao

If I was Alya, I'd have given myself away by now. Actually, I wouldn't have had the presence of mind to even hide.

Guess the counterparts are from some dystopian world ruled by The Supreme. It tracks with the look we got at it in the opening.

"In order to get something I wanted." We saw the Peacock Miraculous in the opening too, and also Emilie died. So I guess Adrien is a Sentimonster in the other reality too. Damn it.

I guess this Gabe realized his mistake instead of descending into madness like ours.

She just broke Marinette's box like it was nothing. So much for that.

Claw Noir lounges around playing with dolls and mocks Shadybug for being lazy while she does all the work and he lazes around. Have I mentioned yet that I love him?

Also I am glad they stayed true to Adrien's character and had him play with dolls.

The whole part about Chat Noir... be still my Ladynoir heart.

Love how they incorporated the webisodes into this. About time those had relevance.

Shadybug really "hates" Claw Noir.

Marinette's having doubts, my poor baby girl.

Shadybug and Claw Noir have power, but not their strength. That's a really good line.

She's reading the diary and crying... baby.

This is such a touching scene. I don't say that lightly, but it really is.

SHE FOUND THE WISH

Marinette really wrote down every single world ending secret in this one poorly protected diary huh.

She literally took him down in 2 seconds. Bruh.

IDENTITY REVEAL! THIS IS NOT A DRILL, I REPEAT, THIS IS NOT A DRILL

Shadybug managed to achieve in 2 seconds what Marinette and Adrien have not achieved after 5 seasons of Love Square drama which I admittedly enjoy but that's not the point.

Those strange... marks? Cracks? Scars?

Blots off... I'm dying y'all.

Reverse Love Square? Hello??? HELLO???

She literally just beat his ass, tied him up and took his Miraculous and this is his reaction once he realizes who she is.

He's down so bad.

They should have played Careless Whisper here.

CUTIE PIE, MY SON

The Supreme is such a fucking asshole, he gagged the Kwamis.

Emonette wants our Marinette's life? She doesn't know the half of what she's getting into.

The Supreme got to the wish somehow? What the fuck?

"Reality is The Supreme." I don't know who this guy is, but he is DELULU.

This shot... masterfully done. My poor baby girl.

These kids are not okay. My poor sweet babies.

Daggers out. Seriously, stop it, you two.

He's trying to comfort her. They're just... I'm in pain. I'm so sad for them y'all.

Gabe in his prototype Monarch outfit.

Good thing (for him at least) he had the Ox, or else this would be his second cataclysm of the day.

Ladybug and Chat Noir are back in action, baby.

I'm sorry, I would not be able to say Betterfly unironically without bursting into laughter.

AFTER 5 SEASONS, WE FINALLY GET TO SEE CHAT NOIR'S NIGHT VISION AGAIN

Not that they needed it lmao

Alya coming in clutch with the recording. Queen.

LADYNOIR LADYNOIR LADYNOIR

It's so so so nice to see Ladynoir on screen again after Season 5 killed it.

Hit the word limit, so continued here.

[sturnalsm]

I CRAVE YOUR TASTE ALL NIGHT LONG ᯓ ᡣ𐭩

♤ Matthew Sturniolo ♤

Warnings: smut, making out, dom matt, swearing, hot pictures.

summary: today you were staying in the triplets house, because your parents were on a trip and you didnt wanted to be alone at your house. You were in the living room, usually when you stay there you sleep in Nicks room because you can talk with him about everything and its really funny, but tonight Chris didnt wanted to sleep alone so he's with Nick now. Matt was in the shower. You receive a snap...

It was 11pm in the evening now, you were in the Sturniolo's house today because your parents were on a trip. you were in their house very often its like you loved there, everytime you slept in Nick's room because its very funny and you stay up late with him talking about everything, but today Chris was going to sleep there because he doesn't really likes to sleep alone. Matt was in the bathroom showering and Nick and Chris were probably asleep because they were saying they were very tried so you didnt wanted to wake them up.

You are scrolling trough tik tok writing for Matt to get out of the bathroom and watch a movie in the living room or something. you receive a snap from Matt. you were confused but you opened you , cause you thought he just makes strikes. you open the snap and you see mirror selfie of Matt just in a towel from the waist. you forgot how to breathe for a second. then he stars tying, you open the chat

Matt

11:15 - come here

you act stupid as if you dont know he is in the bathroom just in a towel.

Y/N

come where? - 11:16

Matt

11:16 - in the bathroom dummy, dont act stupid..

you start blushing and don't even know what to say.

Y/N

why? - 11:17

Matt

11:17 - i'll show you.

you are blushing like an idiot but you start walking towards Matt's bathroom. the door is already opened and he's leaning on the framem you freeze

"come on sweetheart"

you walk closer to him and he grabs your hand pulling you inside the bathroom with him. he closes the door behind you and slams you against it.

"wh- what are you doing..?"

you ask out of breath like you've runned 10km to come here..but its just the fact that Matt is literally almost naked infront of you.

"what does it looks like im doing love?"

you were going insane, you were out of breath, blushing. he knew what he was doing, he knew he was driving you insane even tho you tried to hide it.

"soo..."

he begins as he puts his hands under your T-shirt.

"just the thought of you gets me all worked up, and everytime you come in those little skirts i just wanna rip it off snd fuck you right on the front door, you are such a whore."

he says as he takes your T-shirt off.

"if you thought you'd come again like this and i wont fuck you, you are totally qrong sweetheart..i crave your taste all night long.."

he is way taller than you so he picks you up still against the door. he starts kissing your neck as you start moaning.

"Matt t- ohmygod..thats wrong we cant do it..pl- please.."

you say trying not to moan.

"it might be wrong but it feels so right and you want it."

he opens the door and goes into his bedroom throwing you on his bed. he goes back to the door and locks it. you gasp at the view infront of you which is Matt - the most beautiful person you've ever laid your eyes on, only in a towel.

he takes off his towel and you open your mouth in shock. he climbs onto the bed being ok top of you, start to kiss and suck on your boobs leaving marks on them. you try to hold back your moans but it just feels too good..he dor sure knows what he is doing with his tounge and lips. he goes up to your lips placing yours on his, he doesnt even wait to slide his tounge into your mouth, he swallows every moan that comes out of your mouth.

he cant resist anymore, he is so hard it even hurts. he breaks the kiss and starts licking your boobs, he goes down with his tounge. now he is that your stomach, he unzips your skirt and takes it off in one go with your panties. he starts teasing you by putting his tumb on your clit rubbing on it as you start squirming.

"Matt please...i need you , i need you- in me"

you say and his smirk growing wider

"so needy for this big cock arent ya? beg for it like the whore you are"

he has his knee between your legs now, you arch your back ans squeeze your legs around his leg.

"please matt i beg you..i want you to fuck me"

he looks at you dead in the eyes, he grabs your legs and slides you down so you are on the edge of the bed. you wrap your legs around his waist pulling him closer to you.

"matt please.."

he smirks and positions his self at your entrance. he teases you with his tip making you beg even more. he slams inside of you without warning you causing you to scream

"MATT OHMYGOD"

"shut up, my brothers will hear us and then you'll be in big trouble"

he says as he starts moving faster inside of you hitting you gspot everytime he pounds into you. your ears start to ring and your eyes to blur. he doesnt stop , it doesn't looks like he'll stop anytime soon.

"you feel so good wrapped up around my cock, i dont think I'll last long"

he says still pounding into you with brutal force making you scream uncontrollably.

"cum with me baby"

he says with his low shaky voice. you feel your orgasm approaching, your legs start to shake, you squeeze the sheets and he puts his hand on your throat. you cum all over his cock , with one last thrust he cums deep inside of you.

"good girl"

you moan wanting more , but you know he isnt done without you yeat, he wants to have you like a moaning mess on his bed and he will get that from you.

"on all fours babygirl"

you obey. now he is behind you and puts his hand in the lower of your back pushing on it so you're bending over like a little kitten on the bed. he starts pounding inside of you once again faster than before, he speeds up his thrust every second , you cant take it anymore and you start moaning into the sheets. Matt knows what he's doing he knows how to get you weak as fuck and beg for more. he cant get enough of your pussy. he starts pounding faster and you know he's close , he knows you're close aa well and he wont stop his movements until you make a mess on his cock. he smacks your ass and starts pounding faster and faster inside of you.

after a few pounds you cum on his cock falling on your stomach not being able to take any more. and he knows it, he wont make you take more.

"oh you are so beautiful you have no idea"

he says as he lays next to you kissing your forehead.

"you are amazing Matt.."

you say out of breath. he pulls the blanket over both of youso youre not cold....

HIIIIII THIS IS MY SECOND STORY I HOPE YOU LIKE IT, I TRY MY BEST TO GET BETTER AT WRITING ❤️💋❤️‍🩹

[tw1l1te]

Heyy you fabulous writter! You've had me hooked ever since I first found a post of yours and I don't know if you're taking writing requests but if you are...I'd like to humbly request you to write this idea?🙏

Essentially I think it'd be really cute having a small one-shot of the LU boys in twilights hyrule and them meeting his S/O. His S/O can either be a simple farmer who grew up in the same area or the idea of someone he met on his journey who also had animal turning 'abilities'/features comes to mind so they understand each other more than most. IDK if it's a silly idea or not I just thinks the boys reactions (especially time teasing twilight and such) would be Hella cute! Anyways thanks and keep the good work up! 🫡

- Anon🧋

Yesyesyesyes living out my cottage core dream with mr. cowboy teehee

~

Twilight was getting giddier by the second as he approached Ordon, and the boys could tell. He was clenching and unclenching his fists, trying the keep the nervousness at bay, but how could he do that when he was about to see you. His beloved.

"I don't think I have ever seen you this jittery before, Pup. What's wrong?"

Twilight was about to answer him when they hear a loud gasp.

Twilight turns to see you on a tree above them, clad in what seems to be.... his old tunic? You jump down, hopping down branch by branch before landing inches away from Twilight.

"Oh by three- you're home! I missed you so much-"

He shuts you up, by pulling you in for a kiss, months of love and desperation melting onto you.

You had to pull away to avoid creating awkwardness for the others, "Alright, easyyy cowboy. Now why don't you tell me about your lil' friends?"

Time raises an eyebrow at him, clearly interested in your character.

"Oh! I completely forgot t' introduce myself! I'm Y/n, mister hero's partner."

Time nods, holding out a hand to shake.

"I'm Time, a... friend of Link's. We all met on his recent adventure."

You nod, squinting a bit at him, then eyeing the rest of them. You walk around them slightly, eyeing their garb and equipment a bit before nodding back at your boyfriend.

"They're Links too, aren't they?"

Legend jumps slightly at that, "How did you-"

You smile at him, "I gotta good nose."

Twilight shakes his head, chuckling "Alright, lets go back to the village before you start figuring everyone out."

You jog up to him, animatedly waving your hands, rambling about Colin and how good with swordsmanship he's become. Before you could continue rambling, Wind asks, "How'd you two meet?"

You and Twilight pause, looking at each other before responding.

"Oh, y'know, I met him on his quest during the Twilight Era. Stinky do-wait, they know, right?"

"They're too nosy for their own good."

"Right, so. I met him while I was in my alternate form. Fell on top of me from a brittle tree-"

"-Wait, you have a wolf form too?!" Wind exclaims, running up to you.

You snort, this kid's funny.

"Nah, that's hero's spirit and all. It's better if I show ya."

You focus for a moment before you feel the shift, still uncomfortable but so much less painful than the first time it happened, oh so many years ago.

Opening your eyes, you can feel your senses sharpen, everything intensifying tenfold.

"A fucking fox???!?!! Twilight, your wife is so cool."

"Not my wife yet, but thank you."

You walk up to Wind, cooing at him. He hesitantly pets your fur on your head, earning him a soft purr from you.

You walk up to the rest of them, just looking at them. You give a few extra sniffs to the pink-haired one, him smelling like hare.

Shifting back, you walk back to Twilight, your fur coat retreating back into your skin. You give him a peck on the cheek, continuing your way back to the village.

"Y'all coming or what?"

Twilight breaks out of his lovestruck trance, following you. Time walks up to Twilight, muttering to him,

"I can tell you've got a thing for foxy personalities."

"Oh, shut up."

[angelflms]

here's some of the moments during my rewatch of deadpool & wolverine that were gold for my dad (an x-men/blade/ryan reynolds fan)'s first viewing:

- bye bye dance (dk if he knew that wasn't ryan dancing)

- the happy hogan chauffeur joke

- dopinder's airpods "joke?" "story?"

- yukio like.. pursed her lips up at one point? and my dad thought it was funny so he mimicked her

- he also just loved the wade/yukio moments

- the different code words for cocaine al and wade used (also the delivery of ryan saying "motherfucker" got him for some reason)

- the pegging/hookers joke

- seeing the different wolverines

- THE THOR JOKE (every mention got him)

- "get my country's name out your fucking mouth"

- "haha! not the will smith reference."

- me: *didn't even clock the reference my first time watching the movie*

- the captain america/johnny storm misdirect

- johnny falls

- every hit is followed by my dad being like "ohh. oh. oh. OHHHHH!! damn."

- "i'm marvel jesus. mj if you nasty."

- my dude started CACKLING at that

- idk if my dad remembers all of the xmen series because he didn't recognize toad that much. he did recognize sabertooth tho.

- sees antman skeleton lair

- "yooooo that's dope though!!"

- every drunken logan scene was a blast for him

- his disgusted reaction to nicepool's hair

- his equally disgusted reaction to mary puppins (he liked her tho)

- his even more disgusted reaction wade making out basically with mary puppins (+ immediately sung lady in red tho)

- the honda odyssey scene (idk if he understood the implications. mind y'all he was half asleep)

- "coexist?" he said

- that was his only reaction

- "is that carmen electra" - my dad seeing elektra for the first time (he did see the movie years ago)

- i think he missed the daredevil joke because he was busy laughing at another one

- "ohhhh blade!!!!"

- "you need to watch blade" "I'M WORKING ON IT DAD!!"

- laughed at the "i don't like you." "you never did." joke (blade: trinity is his favorite blade movie for those who don't know or ya know, couldn't tell)

- "ohhhh gambit!"

- "is that...IS THAT REALLY CHANNING TATUM???" (all of the flashbacks of us arguing about channing being gambit coming to the forefront of his mind)

- still isn't sold on it. thinks he's too buff. love the buttery nuts line he said tho

- sees laura

- me giving him a refresher on who that is

- dad: "ohhhh, she's older now!!!"

- laura and wade saying "let's fucking go"

- my dad "hey, did they just copy what logan said earlier?"

- campfire scene

- "you got the wrong guy."

- "you were always the wrong guy"

- dad laughs "yeah dad, you suck."

- dad enjoying wesley snipes as blade

- "there's only one blade"

- "deadpool looks at the camera (referencing blade's reboot coming soon-ish)"

- me and dad "technically he's right."

- dad: "well they're still working on the movie"

- me: "yeah but they went through five directors already"

- dad: "you right. you right."

- blade: *gets stabbed once*

- dad: "ohhhh"

- me: "it was one stab... he's fine."

- me: *forgot why laura had her backpack on* "she could just take the backpack off"

- dad: "she just like you" (after getting home from class i tend to leave it on)

- me: "heyyy"

- dad: "sings the dora "backpack" theme song

- cassandra making a sling ring portal and giving the boys a five second chance to go back to their world

- dad: "you know what would be fuc-messed up? if she closed the portal and they just died."

- "ngl i thought that's what they were gonna do."

- cassandra nova touching people

- me: "imagine having some chick's dirty long fingers inside your head and nose"

- my dad "THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING!"

- laughed at kidpool's wolverine's dick line

- confused at the beheaded zombie wade wilson

- *lightskinned stare fourth wall break* "the proposal"

- "what the fuck was that? bitch, is that what you think i do?"

- dad: LAUGHS (i think he just likes when ryan cusses. he laughed every time he did. but also my dad just really loves ryan reynolds. they have the same humor. tbh the delivery was really good though)

- laughs at nicepools death (i don't blame him)

- logan: *puts on mask*

- dad: "oh he's going old school"

- paradox explaining matter and anti-matter going through someone's body

- my dad, the science fanatic "yup. you gonna explode."

- me: "i know scene just got you excited because they speaking your language."

- "it did."

- madonna's like a prayer plays

- my dad, a madonna fanatic, immediately starts singing

- "he's risen baby girl."

- dad: laughs

- me: sings along to iris

- "put your greasy tits away you preening slut"

- dad: laughs HARDER

- mary puppins comes back

- dad: "ofc"

- mid credits tribute to fox

- "is this the last one?"

- "no it's a tribute to fox. remember disney bought it. wade explained it in the movie."

- "RIIIIIIGHTTT!"

- *sees little dafne*

- "she was so little!"

---

before y'all say anything. no he didn't seen the end credit scene but he did enjoy the whole movie though!!!

this is all the reactions i can remember. i remember him also cackling reall hard at a joke but i don't remember what it was at all to save my life (i think it was when wade said "the gays understood" when they were talking about the multiverse. he also clocked the scoutmaster kevin joke and went like "ohhhhhh damn."

[bonesandpoemsandflowers]

rewatched most of True Detective season 1, episode 1 last night. minor thoughts, not in order, mostly for me to refer back to when I need it. memory of a memory and if I forgot it in like 20 hours, maybe it's not important anyway.

Marty really does go: me? oh normal regular dude. with a huge dick.

Marty, you've JUST met these guys. must they know about your dick.

Oh, Rust is so sad and wet. You know he's sad and wet. You remember that he's sad and wet. And then he's on screen and he's so much wetter and sadder than you remember.

Rust is not even waiting for a red light to pound his fuckin robitussin. my guy, you already specifically experience hallucinations. YOU ARE DRIVING. put down the DXM.

Rust is so funny, actually, in general. "Oh, I wouldn't bust anybody for hooking. OR DRUGS." [sends other girl away to buy drinks] SO. pills? you got pills? you got downers? pills?? <- first half is a quote and the rest is paraphrased but for real. man's here like. so. PILLS? yeah I'm workin. yeah there's a girl missing. medium breasts, natural. now about those pills--

Like, I remembered Rust as mostly functionally sober until the Crash episode, minus his Sophia grief drink binge, and that's just. That's so inaccurate of me. He's hot for it the instant we get him away from Marty.

Marty is actually initially pretty nice at the dinner, nice about Rust showing up while fucking trashed. He bitches Rust out for like a sentence and then reassesses. The cup of coffee, a little physical touching for anchoring, we'll try this again another time, etc.

And Rust is actually quite forthcoming here also--he outright apologizes.

Or, no. Rather:

It's Rust's being forthcoming that prompts Marty to turn nicer. Rust admitting that he doesn't drink because he's had trouble with it before. Explaining meeting a CI, being at the bar, "couldn't think of a good reason not to."

Which is a good example of how they work--they dance--they adjust to each other.

I always remember Rust as less communicative than he actually is. Because in large stretches, he isn't communicative even when he's talkative. But he's actually very forthright, when he chooses. Like, oddly forthright--no wonder Marty backs down immediately. How can you kick that sad wet man while he's down and apologizing to you?

thought for later--ways he is prideful vs the ways he is very much not.

I want to know more about the dead cats in universe, actually. are they black cats? are they being harvested for their bones. first inaccurate santeria mention here. I'm gonna count them all so I can bitch.

not devil traps, devil nets. i mean, nonsense either way. NOT SANTERIA. nor is Santeria incompatible with identifying as a good Christian--up until recently, any Santero you talked to would, in fact, identify as a good Christian and they'd mean it.

Rust never says "alright" or "all right." Rust strictly says aight. Those Ls are getting dropped, baby. I'm usually pretty good about this--was I paying too much attention to the captions? Either way. Not sure I'll go back and fix it, fic wise, but it's something to consider for future dialogue.

UNSURE if they drop their gs as often as I think they do. It took me ten years to learn to understand Southern and if I watch this show for too long, I forget that these dudes even have accents. It's like how if you put me in the panhandle for a week I start droppin' my gs and I can't even hear myself doing it. Not that I consistently pronounce my gs in any case, but usually I know if I'm doing it because it's one of those code switch-y things. can you take elocution lessons as an adult. askin for a friend.

People tend to discuss how Rust is playing Gilbough and Papania, but Marty is ABSOLUTELY performing a bit the whole time so far.

Speaking of Gilbough and Papania: Papania wants Rust to be the killer sooo bad. He's ready to fight Rust in the parking lot as is, no further questions asked.

Gilbough has such a nice smile, actually.

Rust's ties are so shittily tied. I know this is on purpose, it is a Look for the audience, it is a Characterization Choice, the way this man is undone, ramshackle except where he isn't, but I dated a lawyer for a long time so the loose tie is just. On one hand, it's a leash. Good. On the other hand, it's wrong and I know my fingers could fix it.

He does do it up nice for the press conference, however. He knows how. He just chooses not to.

Thinking about the dinner again. I like how lying comes so easily to Marty. He's clearly just so used to it. 

do we actually ever find out who burned the fuckin field in the very first opening shot. is that addressed? ever?