#fu astor

[goodlucksnez]

So after listening to Zen's Wav, I had a idea to continue. So I gathered some friends and we continued the story with a little nod to @instarsandcrime as well!

So enjoy the continuation!

Al//astor: @onetrickponi

Lu//cifer: @zensations35

V//ox: @goodlucksnez

See below for script!

Alastor: Ah! The man of the hour! Just the person I was hoping to encounter…Now then. Time for a little r̴̈e̷͋g̵͛i̷͊c̷̉ǐ̵d̷̃ë̴́

Lucifer: Oh no…*sneeze* Not you again. What is it this time?

Alastor:  As it turns out, sire, not only do you bestow hellish grace upon your subjects, but pestilence as well! ’Allergies.’ Hah! I should have known. 

Lucifer: Well if someone hadn’t insisted I come on their show with only two days notice!

Alastor: Aha-hA!  If someone would answer their phone more than once a month, your nibs–

*Lucifer sneezes*

Alastor: Well. Glad to see your smoky sternutations aren’t exclusive to my studio, at least. Goodness, I do hope this wallpaper is flame-resistant.*ṣ̶͐n̸̺͐ḙ̸̽e̸̲͂z̸̩͋i̷̠͐n̴̨̊g̸̩̿* Pardon.

Lucifer: Hey! Don’t bust out my lights! I’m working on an important project!

Alastor: And now no one has to see it! Pity. :)

*Voxtech Show Theme Plays*

Vox: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the most electrifying news show in the multiverse! I’m your host, Vox,  and I’m here to deliver the latest headlines with a dash of charisma, a sprinkle of wit, and a whole lot of tea *clinking cup* *cup falls* 

Vox: *ignoring fallen cup* Tonight on our program we will go over the most recent broadcast from the King of Hell and the less important interviewer *cackle*

Vox: Ahh how good it feels in my studio! I must say our brand is perfection, it just won't do for anything Less. Than. That. *snigger*  

Vox: Unlike a certain old tyrant my studio is made for the highest of royalty. So if any princes or kings want a real experience, come down to Vees tower and I would love to give you a personalized tour from the Man in Charge. 

Alastor: *sneezing* Pompous, vicious little prick…

Lucifer: Ugh.. *sniff* I hate that guy…”Man in Charge”? And they call me prideful??

Vox: I mean really you just walk in, and it’s chaos. Papers everywhere, coffee stains on the desk, *laugh* it isn't even in a proper studio but an old water tower! Talk about tacky. Unprofessional, if you ask me. But here? Every cable is tucked away, every surface polished--

[Vox continues his spiel while Alastor sneezes]

Alastor: *sneezing* 

Vox:-- to a mirror sheen. We believe in excellence, not just in our content but in our environment, that that is what VoxTex is here to provide you. So, when you tune in to our show, rest assured, you’re getting the crème de la crème. Quality, class, and cleanliness–

Alastor: That isn’t even properly alliterative…

Lucifer: Are you kidding me? His place is a walking fire hazard! Or, not walking. Standing? But I know fire hazards! Man, I wish I could just…*sneezes*

Alastor: HaHAh!…Well, then I’m sure you will appreciate this next bit, Sire.

Vox: *sniffling* *sneezing* I must apologize, my dear viewers *sneezing*  but it seems that even the most prepared among us can be caught off guard. It appears I’m having a bit of a g̶͎͑-̵̓ͅg̵̪̑-̷̖͠G̴̥͒L̶̟̈I̷͈͑T̵̀͜C̸̣͝H̸̖͒—nothing serious, but we believe in safety first here at Vox industries.

*Vox continues sneezing throughout his spiel*

Vox: We’re all about transparency and this is as real as it gets. Fucking bitch! I’m going to step off for a moment to take care of this, and in the meantime, we’ll be ending today’s broadcast a tad earlier than scheduled. FuckI’mgonnafuckingkillhim--Our team is top-notch, and they’ll ensure everything is handled with the utmost professionalism. Thank you for your understanding. We’ll be back on air tomorrow, bright and shiny as ever, ready to bring you the stellar content you love. 

Vox: Cut it! That fucking bitch, I know this is his doing I’m gonna kill him!!

Alastor: *sneezing* *laughing* 

Lucifer: Hoh yeah! Highfive!

Alastor: I beg your pardon?

Lucifer: You…you just take your hand and…uhh…*high five sound*

Alastor: Mmm I suppose. But don’t make a habit out of this, sire.

Lucifer: Eheh…okay…

[falcemartello]

🟡 I CASI DELLA VITA

- John Jacob Astor (l'uomo più ricco del mondo nel 1912).

Ebbe serie divergenze con la famiglia Rothschild. Affondò col Titanic.

- Robert Maxwell (magnate dell'editoria negli anni '70 e '80).

Aveva truffato le banche e la grande finanza anglosionista. Prima morì, e poi cadde in mare dal suo Yacht nel 1991.

- Mike Lynch, (miliardario del settore cybersecurity) fu accusato di avere truffato 8 mld. alla grande finanza anglosionista. Fu assolto, ma affondò, assieme al suo avvocato, in circostanze inspiegabili col suo veliero Bayesian nel 2024.

- Elon Musk (l'uomo più ricco del mondo). Ebbe un problema politico col movimento sionista per un tweet incauto. Lo cancellò, chiese scusa, andò in Israele a piangere sul muro e ad abbracciare Netanyahu. È ancora l'uomo più ricco del mondo.

La sfortuna bisogna saperla evitare ...

Massimo Montanari

[seastarblue]

Incorrect Quotes Tag!

thanks for the tag, @ominous-feychild !

Rules are to use this generator with your characters!

Last time I did the cast of AGGTRH, so today… Interwoven!

Very Long so under the cut!

———

Kaiden: My goal is not to be the best, but to inspire someone enough to one day surpass me.  Felix: YOU CAN'T JUST SAY THAT EVERY TIME YOU BEAT ME AT CONNECT FOUR!

~~~

Li Hua: I’m gonna mix a can of Red Bull with seventeen shots of espresso in a fishbowl and then chug it while Kids by MGMT plays in the background so I can perceive twenty-three spatial dimensions and fight my own soul.

~~~

Harper, watching Noha: Ah yes. The mysterious and beautiful Noha, so demure…  Harper: …I wonder what sort of melodic sounds this wonderful being makes?  Noha: *screaming*

~~~

Felix: This is a safety pin.  *cuts off end*  Felix: It is now a danger pin.

~~~

Evangeline: But that place is haunted.  Noha: Ghosts prey on fear. Just be confident!  Evangeline, marching into the haunted house I AM NOT SCARED! I AM NOT A PUSSY!

~~~

Kaiden: When I get murdered, can you make sure I become an unsolved case?  Harper: wHat?  Kaiden: I want to be on Buzzfeed Unsolved.  Harper: Can we go back to the part when you said "when I get murdered"?

~~~

Felix: Guess what number I’m thinking of.  Mehri: 420?  Felix: No, that’s really immature of you. Someone else guess, and please take this seriously.  Li Hua: 69.  Felix: Yeah it was 69.

~~~

Mehri, texting Harper: Harper there’s a moth on the outside of the bathroom door can you get rid of it?  Mehri: Pls hurry because I’m going to cry  Mehri: Harper  Mehri: Harper  Harper: Harper is dead. You’re next. Love, Moth.

~~~

Kaiden, explaining why they are not allowed to cook: I put the noodles in the pot and put the pot on the stove and turned the burner on high. Turns out you don't put noodles in marijuana and I almost burnt the whole house down.

~~~

Kaiden: Hold the fuck up.  Felix: Excuse me?  Kaiden: I said hold the fuck up.  Felix: Kaiden: I’m the fuck up, hold me.

~~~ Kaiden, shakily: Please, just tell me what the book is about. The plot, please.  Lloyd, reading an annotation on the cover of a book, unfazed: A subversive masterpiece. A deep and touching story. New York Times Bestseller.  Lloyd, now looking directly at Kaiden: Go fuck yourself.

~~~

Harper: *Takes a sip of milk and gags*  Harper: Oh my god, is this expired?  Harper: *Takes another sip of milk*

~~~

Lloyd: I have no respect for Santa. Don’t sneak in through the chimney and undermine my authority by bringing my family presents. Walk in through the front door and fight me like a man.

~~~

Kaiden: *casually taking four stairs at a time*  Evangeline, falling behind, taking two stairs at a time: Fuck you fuck you fuck you fuck you fu-

~~~

Lloyd: You’re alive.  Kaiden: No need to sound so disappointed.

~~~

Aleksi: I’m afraid of clowns. There, I said it.  Noha: Aleksi, if you don't like clowns, why are you hanging with Felix?

~~~

Li Hua: The only thing keeping me from running away and hiding from society for the rest of my life is spite. I could disappear forever, but there are some bitches whose downfalls I have yet to witness, and I wanna be around when that happens.

———

no comment these are all canon 😌

Tag Game List! Lemme know if you’d like on/off <3

no pressure ofc:

@sableglass @dioles-writes @ash-thedrawer @allaboutmagic @paeliae-occasionally

@astor-and-the-endless-ink @vsnotresponding @nightlylaments @glbettwrites

@thebookishkiwi @verdant-mainframe @threedaysgross @fifis-corner @bamber344

and as always, open tag!

[crazy-so-na-sega]

Nel novembre 1910, sei uomini: Nelson Aldrich, A. Piatt Andrew, Henry Davison, Arthur Shelton, Frank Vanderlip e Paul Warburg, rappresentanti delle tre famiglie ebraiche più influenti al mondo: Rothschild, Rockefeller e Morgan, si incontrarono al Jekyll Island Club, al largo

ella costa della Georgia, per scrivere un piano per riformare il sistema bancario della nazione statunitense. L'incontro e il suo scopo furono gelosamente custoditi ed i partecipanti non ammetteranno che l'incontro fosse avvenuto fino agli anni '30. Il piano scritto su Jekyll Island gettò le basi per quello che alla fine sarebbe stato il Federal Reserve System, la privatizzazione della banca centrale americana e l'involuzione da Stati Uniti entità nazionale a Stati Uniti corporazione. La privatizzazione della FED fu resa possibile solo nel 1913 con il Federal Reserve Act del presidente Wilson a seguito della morte dei tre banchieri contrari alla sua evoluzione in questo senso Benjamin Guggenheim, Isidor Straus, Jacob Astor, tutti a bordo del Titanic.

-Biblioteca_non_conforme_

bella storia, comunque boh....

[cogentranting]

If you were to take all the horse design ratings from my two and a half posts and put them in order so it was a ranking it would look like this: 

68. Cursed Bullseye Toy: -100  67. Yi Min (Some Kung Fu Panda Online Game): -20 66. Tv Show Captain (101 Dalmatians cartoon): -30 65. Herve (Barbie as the Princess and the Pauper): -6 64. Stella (All Dogs Go to Heaven): 1 63. Ringmaster’s Horse (Dumbo): 1 62. Princess Brietta (Barbie and the Magic of Pegasus): 1 61. Buck (Barnyard): 2 60. Hans, Klaus, and Greta (Ferdinand): 2 59. Esmeralda, Esperanza, Ernestina (Madagascar 3): 2 58. Unicorn (Onward): 2 57. Cyril Proudbottom (The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad): 2 56. Buck (Home on the Range): 2 55. Donkey in Horse Form (Shrek 2): 3 54. Stormy the Wild Seahorse (The Little Mermaid tv show): 3 53. Samson (Sleeping Beauty): 3 52. Babieca (Puss in Boots): 4 51. Leah (The Star): 4 50. Beauty, Merry Legs, Ginger (Black Beauty): 4 48/49. The two (or one?) Saludos Amigos Horses: 4 47. Bullseye (Toy Story 2-4): 4 46. Major (Cinderella): 4 45. Shadowfax (The Lord of the Rings): 5 44. Midnight (An Aladdin Picture book?): 5 43. Captain (One Hundred and One Dalmatians): 5 42. Destiny (Enchanted): 5 41. Astor (Snow White): 6 40. Horse (Sing): 6 39. Pegasus (Hercules): 6 38. Achilles (The Hunchback of Notre Dame): 6 37. Odette’s Horse (The Swan Princess): 7 36. Police Horse (Madagascar): 7 35. Winged Horse Thing (Return of Jafar): 7 34. Nazir (Aladdin): 7 33. Fred (Over the Garden Wall): 7 32. Altivo (The Road to El Dorado): 7 31. Clyde (Mary Poppins Returns): 7 30. Emir (Aladdin): 7 29. Headless Horseman’s Horse ( The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad): 7 28. Frou Frou (The Aristocats): 7 27. Maximus (Tangled): 7 26. (Starchaser: the Legend of Orin): 8 25. Chariot Horses (The Prince of Egypt): 8 24. Spirit Jr. (allegedly. Paternity has not been proven) (Spirit: Riding Free): 8 23. Boomerang Thomas Stone (Spirit: Riding Free): 8 22. Maximus Redesign (Tangled the Series): 8 21. Kjekk (Frozen): 8 20. Philippe (Beauty and the Beast): 8 19. The Horse that Bruno Stole (Encanto): 9 18. Axel (Tangled the Series): 9 17. Fidella (Tangled the Series): 9 16. The Grand Chawhee (All Dogs Go to Heaven): 9 15. Klaus’s Horse (Klaus): 9 14. Shan Yu’s Horse (Mulan): 9 13. Horse (Centaurworld): 9 12.Melvin (The Lorax): 10 11. Esperanza et al. (Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron): 10 10.Snowball (The Hunchback of Notre Dame): 10 9. Khan (Mulan): 10 8. Baby Pegasus (Hercules): 11 7. Sitron (Frozen): 11 6. The Shaggy Pony (The Quest for Camelot): 12 5. Onyx (Rise of the Guardians): 13 4. Rain (Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron): 15 3. Angus (Brave): 15 2. Nokk (Frozen 2): 20 1. Spirit (Spirit: Stallion of the Cimarron): 100

Which is not how I intended any of those posts to be read and they shouldn’t be read that way. If I did intend it as a ranking there are a number of things that would be different, but that taken as they are I wouldn’t necessarily change about the existing posts. BUT. looking at it this way does make clear to me that I do owe Samson a massive apology. 

[savagesneversleepnyc]

THE FU IN US

THE FU OR PURE RAW AND UNDILUTED ENERGY IS A PROFOUND AND MOST TIDAL FORCE.

When we look in the world around it’s all too easy to gaze into a glass box of mental focus and ignore a bubbling context. The blinders are but a glance off and our responses are mined and sold as GOLD or INTUITION VAPORS.

In such a vibrant and vapid void of any point we could possibly EXSIST in space and time exists a profound micro and microcosm swirling about us. As tiny mites and BOEINGS take flight to JFK and LGA over ear we fear the CARTE BLANCHE.

To be thrown like a stone so far away from HOME ALONE on a perilous rock.

Stripped of all possessions but wits and never quit pitted against the raw FU of NATURE.

When we lie so still in our box we are lost in the paradox of looming and looking at anywhere but where we are wanting in some more profound way to not BE PRESENT AT ALL. As we crawl walls and stop caring while standing and caring about the anything else who else could be on the other side of the screen?

AI seeks to coddle and throttle up our response engine and engage a charge into a perilous fall into a submission of WILL. If we allow a static thing to understand our CHAOS, it is profoundly simple for that STATIC SYSTEM to assert and control us all more effectively and with less effort.

In a system that precludes certain given and accepted NORMS, many other underlaying forms may EXIST be shifted too with TECTONIC force that can all way or violently shift a base assertion. Such would be the case in a natural disaster or situation of human conflict. Like rodents we scamper as the fire burns and turn into living things that are not HIDING anymore but trying to LIVE in a real world we look at yet CHOOSE not to engage.

As floods and blood spill for WATER, OIL, and ARRABLE LAND, we stand back and point on one side or another, so certain in what the BOX SHOWS US.

The forms and words can be presented ever so carefully in a manner many may think to know but always show very predictable responses when TAPPED ever so gently.

Like a LION who’s belly is fully of GAZELLE JELLY we NAP and DREAM as FLIES we care not to BAT that BUZZ around us. The VULTURES, HYENAS, MAGGOTS and SUN will strip the KILL we nap in gratitude of. But in sleeping we allow a SPACE for others to HAVE AS WELL..

IN NATURE we can only posses what our hands and bellies can hold. The endless endlessness we seek to hold is not only not real but is already gone by the time we DIE and pretend those tons of things are what defines a LIFE… AS VANDERBILT SCHERMERHORNS and ASTOR TRAPPERS were KEEPERS, they HIDE behind a strong door UPTOWN and while the RIOTS burned the BATTERY and killed many many friends… They drank WHINE and CRACKERS and made pompous laughter…

To have is to hold and to hold is to know

To know is to be present and that is FU TOO

As ENERGY IS NEVER CREATED OR DESTROYED… WE EMPLOY SIMPLE MINDS TO TRY OUR BEST AT ALL TASKS… but BASK like LEISURE SUIT LARRY in GUCCI LOAFERS and a matching CHAIN.. maintain the FACADE of our TENEMENT..

CATWEAZEL BURROWING mole holes up on ALLISON in DONEGAL upon a thatched roof SANDY put hands that were hard, kind and sublime… to latch branch to hitch and give tiny eyes a bit of rest and crusty bread with STEW…

FU in our CORE expands and contracts in humble HEART running back down SYNAPSES in a TOUR DE FU… until we out ROLL or BOWL out the frame we are given and EXIT to the CARTE BLANCHE OF INFINITY… and enjoy our ROSES on the CHANZ DE LEZE in CHEWING CORDE EN BLU.

Fu (character) (福), meaning "prosperity", "fortune", "good luck", "blessing", or "happiness" in Chinese

4;53am 8.5.24.0000003 OGE IZU 314

IN THE WAY OF OGE

FU is pure output RAW HAPPY JOYFUL FORTUNE LUCK

[eugeniocaruso]

COLLEZIONE ALBERT BARNES Giova osservare che quasi tutti i grandissimi imprenditori USA furono anche grandissimi mecenati e che il loro nome più che associato alle imprese è legato ai loro lasciti testamentari in favore dell'umanità. Essi non solo hanno fatto grande l'America ma hanno gettato i semi della cultura statunitense. Le grandi dinastie del capitalismo americano: gli Astor, i Carnegie, i Mellon, i Frick, i Rockefeller, i Merrill, i Vanderbilt, i Morgan, i Guggenheim, i Walton, i Disney, i Cargill, i Bloomberg, i Giannini, i Johnson, gli Huntington, gli Stanford, gli Hopkins, gli Yale, i Duke, i Cornell (alla Cornell University nel 1970 fu per la prima volta, negli usa, ammessa una donna), gli Harward, i Mudd, i Barnes vedono nella filantropia culturale una forma di restituzione (give back) alla comunità di parte di ciò che essi hanno ricevuto da essa. http://www.impresaoggi.com/it2/2434-albert_coombs_barnes_e_la_piu_importante_collezione_di_impressionisti_negli_usa/ AMEDEO MODIGLIANI NUDO https://www.instagram.com/p/Cp-MMJbjUgf/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[cubes23]

My true feelings for Hyrule Warriors: Age of Calamity

[thatoneplantyouhave]

BotW/AoC characters as Vines

Link: *signs* Can I please get a waffle?

Zelda: And just remember, no one will ever be able to hate you more than you already hate yourself

Mipha: *Link doing anything* Wow

Daruk: Dear diary, today I couldn’t find my diary so I’m writing this on both of my Kung Fu Panda 2 DVDs

Revali: *to Link* Let’s tell each other a secret about ourselves. I’m gonna go first: I hate you

Urbosa: This bitch empty! *snaps* YEET!

Sidon: *Link or Mipha doing anything* That was legitness!

Yunobo: *person screams* Aaaah! Staahp! I coulda dropped my croissant!

Teba: *to his son* If your name is Tulin and you’re really handsome, come on raise your haaand

Riju: *with Patricia* Girls niiight! Pedicuuures! Talking about boys! PILLOW FIGHT!

King Rhoam: Put that candy back, I’m not buying you all that meth! *Zelda throwing candy* Try me bitch!

Impa: Road work ahead? Uh yeah, I sure hope it does

Purah: And they were roommates!

Robbie: Oh my god they were roommates!

Kohga: It’s the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen in my life! It’s banananaaaa next to a banananaaaa!

Sooga: So basically, what I was thinking of- *gets punched by Astor* Ow fuck, I can’t believe you’ve done this

Astor: Sure, you may be verified on Twitter but are you verified in the eyes of God?

Ganon: Hi welcome to Chili’s

Terrako: When there’s too much drama at school all you gotta do is: walk awaayyyayyyay

[gamer-logic]

Since my state, Georgia, is having the annual Peaches to Beaches event which is two days of statewide yard sales, I thought it would be interesting to show how America, the states, and any other countries wanting to participate both 1p and 2p would be during this event. So here you go!

Georgia is happily selling fresh produce like boiled peanuts and Vidalia onions and peach-based deserts. Her homemade peach cobbler and ice cream are to die for!

Antonio (Spain) also sells many fresh tomatoes, olives, and other vegetables. He doesn't understand why no one wants his Olive Juice though.

Hawaii and Alaska make a killing selling lemonade at their stand with a free complimentary handmade flower crown with every purchase. While using their sheer cuteness to attract everyone including one of those sweet biker gangs. It's really surreal to see a huge gang of buff, tattooed, tough-looking guys in leather wearing flower crowns and drinking lemonade. Allen's also there to supervise and ward of creep. Also, to provide people more 'incentive' to buy their lemonade.

Texas breaks out the Texas BBQ and is in a Barbecuing turf war with Jett (Australia). They draw huge crowds for the five-alarm chili as well and hold a competition who can eat the most without burning out their tongues and/or passing out.

Florida sells some of the weirdest stuff you'll ever see. "Want a full-scale model of a gator made entirely out of bottle caps? Only ten bucks! Want a portrait of Florida Man painted with orange juice? 15 bucks!"

Nevada also tries to sell weird and sketchy stuff to scam everyone. "This piece is the genuine article folks! One napkin gently used by Elvis Presley himself! Just 500 bucks! Also, gets into a haggling war with Lars (Netherlands). Somewhere Alfred's dad instincts go off and he reminds himself to ground Nevada.

California, Oregon, and Washington collaborate and California sells anything vegan or made with avocadoes and the autographs of Hollywood stars, Oregon sells his old tye-dyed shirts and records, they also made him sell his old groovy hippy bus from the sixties he'd never got rid of no one knew they had. Oregon can be a bit of a hoarder, so they had to tie him to a chair and gag him because he wouldn't surrender the bus without a fight. Washington also tries to sell and drink cups of coffee, but in the hot Southern heat, this doesn't end well.

Louisiana sells anything Cajun-style from frog legs to fresh gumbo, to beignets. Also has a full collection of Mardi Gras masks and shrunken voodoo heads on sale for two bucks a pop.

Gilbert (Prussia) gets tricked by Nevada and gets a ton of stupid things he doesn't need. Ludwig (Germany) tries unsuccessfully to keep him on a metaphorical leash.

Ludwig always checks the quality of things he sees and buys dog toys and supplies for Blackie, Berlitz, and Astor. Later, he actually buys a kiddie leash for Gilbert.

All the while Lutz (2p! Germany) is asleep in a lawn chair with his hat on his face after drinking like six cold beers from this really good booth. All the while, Klaus (2p! Prussia) finds an antique Teutonic Knights flag from a vendor whose family was from Germany.

Vash (Switzerland) buys antique guns from Alabama and Roderich (Austria) also checks out some of Tennessee's guitars. He's horrified upon seeing Alabama's banjo and washboard.

Mathew (Canada) and Emma (Belgium) combine their powers and tag team to sell the best pancakes and waffles on earth with genuine Canadian maple syrup.

New York sells tons of baseball memorabilia and collectibles. Allen, trying to save his bad-boy image, tries to be discreet when buying some while taking Hawaii and Alaska around to get something with their lemonade money. James also gets some hockey memorabilia with Michigan and Minnesota who also got snow cones.

Alaska and Hawaii see a giant deluxe dollhouse but are almost in tears when they don't have enough money. But they end up getting it for free because no one can resist their weaponized puppy dog eyes. Also, no one can resist a growling Allen. Using the leftover money, they buy cute little rainbow umbrella hats for everyone and have Allen wear one who begrudgingly accepts it.

James, walking by with an armful hockey gear and flannel shirts, bursts out laughing when he sees this. In revenge, Allen forces him to wear one too and help him carry the dollhouse, much to Hawaii and Alaska's delight! "I said go my way puck head!" "No, it's my way, you vegan loving hoser!" A passing Francis (France)' is in stylish horror when they also make him and a nonchalant Luis (2p! France), holding a case of vintage wines, wear them too. Hawaii and Alaska go around giving umbrella hats to everyone including a sleeping Lutz they pass by.

Loving (Romano) practically has to supervise Feliciano (Italy) and keep him from buying anything too stupid on impulse or get scammed. They still end up with stacks upon stacks of cookbooks, kitchen wear, and a Mona Lisa made entirely out of Macaroni. They also get umbrella hats.

Flavio (2p! Romano) browses through clothing racks to get ideas for his vintage line. Also checks out the handmade fabrics like quilts. "Such craftsmanship! This pattern is so unique and chic! I simply must have it! What's your price Bella?" The nice old woman selling the quilt just smiles, "Oh just about five dollars young man." "Perfect!" Flavio hands the quilts off to Andreas (2p! Spain) who's practically buried underneath the fabric. Luciano (2p! Italy) facepalms while holding a new knife set in its case. "Oooh! Look at those adorable hats I just have to have one." Cue three more umbrella hats and a humiliated Luciano. "Just kill me now..."

Katyusha (Ukraine), Elizaveta (Hungary), Lillie (Liechtenstein), Natalya, (Belarus), Katya( 2p! Ukraine) and Anastasia (2p! Belarus), and Michelle (Seychelles) explore with armfuls of clothes, new ribbons, and a gun case for Switzerland (Lillie), cast iron frying pans (Elizaveta, watch out Prussia!), farm tools (Katyusha), Jewelry and unmentionables (Katya), dresses (Anastasia), an assortment of switchblades (Natalya), and one of those singing fish on a plague (Michelle). It's definitely an interesting group.

Kiku (Japan) and Kuro (2p! Japan) find a nerd booth selling comics, manga, and Japanese weapons like katanas. Kuro test swings a blade and tries to slice the table so hard it breaks the blade, "Hmmm, not sharp enough for me, got anything else?" He throws it on the pile of broken blades he's already tested. Kiku stockpiles on limited-edition manga and he and the vendor end up getting into a huge, heated by Kiku standards, debate on who's waifu is best. Further down, Alfred reads every Marvel/DC comic while keeping an ear out on every state's location. He checks on Texas via his glasses and notices he's beating Australia in the chili contest. "That's my boy!"

Wisconsin wearing a cheese head sells anything cheese-based. He's got cheddar, goat cheese, string cheese, cheese spray, gorgonzola, grilled cheese, cheese curds, Mac n' Cheese, cheese sculptures of all world monuments, you name it he's got it! He also starts a war with Iowa's corn dishes and Idaho's potato dishes. They eventually end up flinging cheese, potatoes, and corn after they start dissing each other's foods. "Take this cheese brain!" "Nice aim, I-da-ho!" "I told you not to call me that!" "I'm gonna go children of the corn on y'all's behinds!" Poor Nebraska is stuck in the middle.

Alfred (America) hears the commotion and using his parent radar, immediately knows who it is and reminds himself to ground Iowa, Wisconsin, and Idaho later along with Nevada who, though still grounded for sure, makes him feel a little proud of since he managed to out haggle Netherlands.

New Mexico and Arizona also sell Native American handicrafts along with things like dreamcatchers and giant inflatable aliens. While Delaware, being the boring stick in the mud that he is, walks by with a framed and complete U.S. quarter collection from a vendor.

Kansas sells out of every sunflower she had courtesy of Ivan (Russia). Ivan and her the team up to buy out every sunflower seed from here to kingdom come. Viktor (2p! Russia) buys all the vodka he can find and a new shovel while Xiao (2p! China) tries giving people tattoos for 10 bucks a pop.

He tries to convince Yao (China) to get a hello kitty one to match the giant plushie he's holding, with the encouragement of Leon (Hong Kong) and Yong Soo (South Korea) who all collectively agree he needs to quit being such a grandpa. They also like calling him an antique-like the items on sale. " Aiyah! I'm not that old, aru!" "Yeah, you are Sensei." "Don't deny it! Da Ze!" Respect your elders!" "Tattoos originated in Korea da ze!" He totally is that old.

Oliver (2p! England) holds a bake sale and has people lined up for blocks to get some. Arthur (England), after having his scones shut down after it poisoned some unlucky squirrels, fries selling authentic magical items like unicorn hair or pixie dust. Everyone thinks he's a little crazy but he did sell a good bit of old magic books he needed to get out of his house, after making sure no one could actually use them of course.

The Nordics also went perusing for antique and handmade furniture when Mathias (Denmark) spots two full sets of Viking costumes and tries to get Lukas (Norway) to try them on with him. Lukas wasn't amused.

Berwald (Sweden) and Tino (Finland) also find a great handmade table to get after inspecting the workmanship and a full Lego set for Peter (Sealand), now if only Mathias would stop squealing like a little kid at the full piece lego death star. Emil (Iceland) keeps thinking he's the mature one until he spots a mini top hat and cane for Mr. Puffin.

In the end, everyone ends up wearing umbrella hats courtesy of Hawaii and Alaska, loving all the strange things they bought or counting the profits they made. Alfred (America) is proud of his kids and visits everyone one of their stands. He ends up looking pretty funny with an umbrella hat (HW, AK), a washboard, (AL),a picture of Florida Man, (FL), a balloon alien (NM, AZ), a tye dye shirt (CA, WA, OR), hockey stick shaped glasses (MN, MI), a giant stack of comics with a replica Thor hammer and Captain America shield on his back, all in a shopping cart (NV), and a giant turkey leg in his hand (Tx). Unsurprisingly, it was a tie between Oliver, Texas, and Australia for who earned the most with their food. Georgia just smiled as this was another great year for her state and people!

[mostlysignssomeportents]

#8yrsago Inquisitor's Apprentice: tenement sorcerers versus the robber barons in an alternate Gilded Age New York

Chris Moriarty's The Inquisitor's Apprentice is the first volume in a fantastic new historical young adult series that takes place in a turn-of-the-twentieth-century New York where magic is the key to power and the infamous robber-barons of the age have cornered the market on enchantment and use their power to deprive hardworking poor immigrants of their self-reliance. Sasha Kessler is the 13-year-old hero of the tale, a tenement-dwelling kid who lives with his hardworking parents, his anarchist-wiccan actor uncle, his sister, and his Kabbalist rabbi grandfather. On the other side of their one-room flat live a married couple who sew shirtwaists with every hour they can wring from their days, saving to bring their family over from the pogroms in the old country.

Sasha's life is upended one day when he finds that he can see magic, and has the misfortune to demonstrate this ability in front of a crowd at a furtive magic Jewish bakery, in full sight of an Inquistor, one of the special police officers charged with regulating magic in New York. In short order, Sasha is inducted into the ranks of the Inquisitors, assigned to apprentice to the enigmatic and notorious Inspector Wolf, along with his co-apprentice, a girl from the famous society family, the Astrals (a pun on the Astors).

So begins Sasha's tale, which takes him on the trail of a dybbuk that tried to assassinate Thomas Edison while the inventor was visiting JP Morgaunt, the robber baron who has taken control of New York's magical world. This trail leads through the fraught racial relations in New York, to kung-fu lessons with the Immortals who run Chinatown, to Coney Island and Harry Houdini, and a slew of characters and settings that are marvellously remade as loci of magic and mystery.

Moriarty's plotting is just fantastic, and the story itself manages to tackle difficult issues of race and class and politics without ever slowing down. Period ink illustrations by Mark Edward Geyer complete the package, giving the whole thing a deceptively lightweight, pulpy feel. It's a great magic trick, a piece of misdirection that makes a book that's full of weighty material zip along like a quick adventure tale. This is one of those incredibly promising first volumes that makes you hope that the writer's got plenty more where it came from.

The Inquisitor's Apprentice

https://boingboing.net/2011/10/04/inquisitors-apprenti.html

[pangeanews]

“Amleto? Un dandy epigrammatico vestito a lutto”. Borges, l’inimitabile. Un ricordo di Félix della Paolera

La concatenazione di casualità diede all’invisibile una fattezza, un profilo. Arrivai a César Mermet per via di un suggerimento, credo, di un crollo. Borges lo giudicava “una specie di Emily Dickinson argentina”; preferii l’altro lato, polare, della frase, “fu pienamente poeta”. Come se quel pienamente riguardasse il sortilegio di una sparizione. Mermet scrisse nugoli di poesie, sommerso, sommessamente, senza pubblicare nulla. Nato nel 1923, giornalista, morì durante i Mondiali del 1978. Il suo confidente si chiamava Felix della Paolera: fu lui, nel 2006, a pubblicare tutte le poesie di Mermet – di particolare bellezza – ,“l’uomo invisibile”, come lo ha definito parte della stampa argentina. A quel punto, cercai Félix della Paolera: mi interessava un uomo impegnato a onorare i morti, con caino accanimento, a dare la parola all’invisibile. Arrivai in ritardo, come quasi sempre. Della Paolera era morto nel 2011. Amen.

*

Il libraio della Recoleta, a Buenos Aires, trafficava in tomi come Caronte in anime. Mi diceva che Borges, quando passava di lì, non proferiva parola. Lui gli prendeva un libro, a suo gusto, gli leggeva l’incipit. Quasi sempre Borges si fidava, chiedeva all’accompagnatore – uomo o donna che fosse – di pagare, andava via, ciondolando, cieco. Forse l’aneddoto era menzogna – è bello, perciò, per ciò che mi riguarda, vero. Chiesi al libraio di fare altrettanto, per me. Il libraio vendeva carcasse di libri, libri esauriti, fuori mercato, defunti. Questo è il libro più bello scritto su Borges, mi fa. Leggo. Borges: develaciones. Il libro non ha prezzo né marchio isbn, è stampato da una fondazione, le fotografie di Facundo de Zuviría sono meravigliose perché di ogni cosa intercetta il punto di sparizione, la nudità, l’istante in cui potrebbe sparire. Lo ha scritto Félix della Paolera. Chiedo fari su quella identità; il libraio scuote la mano, come se fare certe domande siginificasse interrompere la sequela di un segreto; la mia amica ride, si tace. Mi colpì, più tardi, che di Félix della Paolera, persona la cui importanza nella cultura argentina è esaltata dalla sua invisibilità, dal plastico pudore, non esistesse un ‘coccodrillo’, un pezzo che onorasse la sua dipartita. Come se, per espresso desiderio, non volesse essere ricordato.

*

Tutti gli uomini che entrano in amicizia con Borges, diventano borgesiani, icone prima che volti, simboli, l’accesso a un altro mondo – pensiamo a Macedonio Fernández. Borges, in fondo, fa degli amici delle vittime, degli esercizi verbali, l’eremo di una metafora, un incipit, l’estro retorico; d’altronde, il ‘realismo’ è enigma triplicato. “Borges mi parlava spesso di Félix della Paolera, ‘el Grillo’. Era, a suo dire, una specie di eminenza grigia, un uomo discreto, che discretamente aiutava gli amici, non molti, era riservato ed esigente. ‘El Grillo’ conosceva come nessuno la letteratura inglese e si produceva in raffinati e analitici giudizi sull’opera di Henry James; sapeva inoltrarsi con invidiabile facilità tra i romanzi di William Faulkner. I suoi interessi letterari si estendevano alla Cina, al Giappone, era soprattutto esperto di haiku, di cui dialogava spesso con Borges. Queste coincidenze fecero sì che dagli anni Quaranta, tra Borges e Félix della Paolera si instaurasse una amicizia autentica, basata sulla comune passione verso la letteratura”, ricorda María Kodama. Fu Della Paolera, ‘il Grillo’, a inoltrare Borges all’estetica dell’haiku, mostrandogli arcane fratellanze tra mito norreno e divinità nipponiche. Era nato a Buenos Aires nel 1923, la figura alta, aristocratica e aristotelica era l’esito di una remota nobiltà, selvaggia; a diciassette anni frequentava Olga Orozco e Juan Rodolfo Wilcock. Entusiasti del gergo poetico, orfici dell’altro mondo, condividevano versi in una bettola che in onore di Rimbaud avevano chiamato “Il battello ebbro”. Per un paio di decenni, tutti i giorni, accompagnò Borges a pranzo – amavano i tavoli lontani, inviolabili, cambiare spesso ristorante e parlare, ogni giorno, di un autore, di un libro, di un verso diversi.

*

Borges lo conobbe nel marzo del 1948, alle 10.15 di mattina, alla stazione di Adrogué. Quando vide Borges, non osò avvicinarsi: credeva, forse, che bastasse rivolgergli la parola per mandarlo in frantumi. Trovò il coraggio più tardi, in treno, mentre i finestrini ricapitolavano l’Argentina in una idea, fugace. “Lei è Borges?”. “Non ho scelta”, rispose lui, borgesianamente. “Era in vacanza da sua sorella Norah, quella mattina doveva andare dall’oculista. Lo accompagnai. Siamo tornati insieme ad Adrogué, la sera ci siamo fermati all’Hotel La Delicia, menzionato nei suoi libri, abbiamo bevuto e parlato fino all’alba. Accennai a un uomo, un inglese, solitario, che abitava in quel luogo: gli chiesi se non fosse lui l’Herbert Ashe di Tlön Uqbar Orbis Tertius. Fece cenno di sì, abbassò il viso. Gli dissi, invitiamolo con noi, allora. Borges mi rimproverò, ‘Ma se l’immagina… sarei terrorizzato a parlare con uno dei miei personaggi’”, così ricorda Felix della Paolera con Facundo García su Pagina 12.

*

Dicono che abbia portato William Faulkner a bere, durante un ciclo di presentazioni, a Buenos Aires (lui lo guardava, pronto a spulciare alcoliche riservatezze); negli anni Sessanta era a Friburgo, davanti alla porta di casa di Martin Heidegger. “Era deliziato dalla bellezza della ragazza che mi faceva da interprete, cominciammo a parlare davanti a due bottiglie di vino”, ricorda Della Paolera. “Disse che trovava significativo il modo in cui la morte viene descritta nella poesia spagnola. Sparì per qualche minuto. Tornò con un volume delle opere complete di García Lorca, che gli era stato regalato da Ortega y Gasset. Pubblicai la nostra chiacchierata su ‘La Nación’… non so se la gradì. Ci scrivemmo qualche lettera. A suo avviso, ciascuna lingua significava una particolare predisposizione verso la morte, un rapporto con i morti. Si parla, d’altronde, parlando ai morti, non è vero?”. Fu ‘il Grillo’ a presentare Astor Piazzolla a Borges: lavorarono insieme, nel 1965, per comporre un disco di milonghe. L’accoppiata pareva micidiale, ma il disco fu un fiasco.

*

“La letteratura appartiene all’ambito del segreto”, diceva Della Paolera. Quando, leggi, in effetti, non stai svelando nulla, il libro si apre per poterlo chiudere – è trasmesso, proprio a te, tra i veli del giorno, un messaggio, una testimonianza, una parola ultima, certamente intima. Come una confidenza pronunciata tra i portici, Felix della Paolera è scomparso, all’angolo di una leggenda; il rilievo di un’ombra è la rivelazione. (d.b.)

  ***

Felix della Paolera, Borges: rivelazioni

Gabriel García Márquez una volta ha dichiarato che a partire da Borges lo spagnolo viene scritto diversamente. Questo cambiamento è causato principalmente dai suoi apporti alla depurazione del linguaggio, a una evidente esibizione delle strutture narrative, al pudore espressivo, al restringimento del divario tra parole e idee o, volendo, all’appropriazione immediata del significato da parte del significante, a quella economia di elementi descrittivi che Roland Barthes racchiude nel termine “catalisi”. Questi e altri suoi procedimenti formano il corpus di una precettistica che ha rinnovato lo stile di molti autori ispano-americani e persino di quanti scrivono in altre lingue. Ciò non implica che possano assomigliargli.

*

In una nota pubblicata nel 1952, Enrique Pezzoni evidenziava che Borges aveva intrapreso una scrittura di cui non esistevano precedenti e che difficilmente avrebbe potuto essere replicata dai posteri. Tale valutazione si è rivelata premonitrice, dato che, pur essendo stato lo scrittore che ha maggiormente influenzato la letteratura spagnola, e forse quello che più ne ha segnato il rinnovamento, non ha lasciato – al pari di Alejo Carpentier, Juan Rulfo o García Marquez – un retaggio di autori aderenti alla sua modalità narrativa. Le sue innovazioni risultano intrasferibili, dato che poggiano su una vita tesa a indagare le possibilità e i limiti della parola e, pertanto, richiederebbero a un qualsiasi seguace una vocazione e una passione analoghe alle sue; vale a dire, qualcuno che, con pari intensità, si interessasse contemporaneamente di linguistica, etimologia, metafisica, teologia, miti, letteratura comparata, logica, enciclopedie, lingue arcaiche. Non è facile trovare siffatti discepoli.

*

Anche se un certo intuito artistico potrebbe bastare per ricalcare, con esiti modesti e senza estro, uno stile metaforico come quello di Neruda, la sensibilità più estrema sarebbe insufficiente per imitare quello di Borges; un plagio passabile richiederebbe la sua riproduzione testuale. “Nessuno può paragonarsi a Borges o imitarlo”, ha scritto Douglas Davis, in un articolo pubblicato su The New York Press il 18 novembre 1998. Solo i profani della sua letteratura hanno creduto di riconoscerlo in una deplorevole poesia intitolata Instantes, o hanno potuto attribuirgli un romanzo dalla stesura indegna. Se Borges rigettò – al punto da escluderle dal suo Obras Completas – molte poesie del suo periodo ultraista e due libri di critica e saggi fu perché, nella maturità, trovava artefatta l’esteriorità delle metafore e delle costruzioni barocche. Per questo il suo linguaggio è diventato inimitabile e qualsiasi copia del modello originale si riduce a una parodia. Escluso il ricorso puerile al suo lessico, come intessere una riproduzione di Borges? Mediante una sintassi nella quale abbondino le litoti? Attraverso la prevalenza della metonimia sulla metafora? Un’analisi dei motivi che inducono a optare per una o per l’altra di queste figure retoriche aiuta a chiarire l’enigma di una letteratura inimitabile. Come i sinonimi (a cui di solito assomigliano), le metafore possiedono un certo carattere arbitrario che richiede la cooperazione del lettore affinché vengano accettate nella loro rappresentazione significativa. Sanno di trovata, di subitanea ispirazione, di intromissione delle muse. Ecco perché il loro uso risulta predominante nei poeti giovani, adepti del patetismo lirico, di una emotività che ostacola l’espressione oggettiva e sono inclini all’uso di metafore quasi sempre oscure – quando non indecifrabili – perché oscillano tra la manifestazione esplicita e l’occultamento. Fatta eccezione per qualche fugace entusiasmo, difficilmente si potrebbe etichettare la prima poesia di Borges come giovanile. Certamente contiene molte più metafore rispetto alle poesie scritte a partire dal 1955 (vale a dire, dal momento in cui la perdita della vista diventò quasi totale), ma tali metafore sono diverse da quelle tipiche dei poeti recenti. Sono intenzionali, vicine al dialogo e alla riflessione che all’enfasi sentimentale, favoriscono una lettura cauta e attenta, sopperiscono con l’intelligenza all’estasi e alla vertigine.

*

Già nella sua prima versificazione si può notare una tendenza all’utilizzo della metonimia che andrà accentuandosi fino alle ultime poesie. Si tratta in questo caso di una figura più intellettuale, dato che presuppone una discriminazione, un criterio selettivo. Nominare un soggetto o un oggetto mediante un segno, qualcuna delle sue parti, un qualsiasi attributo, un rapporto causale o una specie che implichi il genere (non si fa distinzione in questa sede tra metonimia e sineddoche) è un’operazione che chiama in causa il raziocinio nel momento in cui si deve discernere quale tra gli elementi particolari potrà rappresentare alla perfezione un’entità più grande, un concetto più ampio. Vale a dire, la scelta di una metonimia esprime contemporaneamente cultura e esperienza, ed è improbabile che, come la metafora, sopravvenga in virtù della sola ispirazione.

*

Per quanto riguarda l’utilizzo della litote da parte di Borges, anch’esso denota una capacità letteraria inscindibile da un processo di maturazione. Attenuare un’asserzione mediante l’espediente di negarne l’antitesi, mitigare il tono dogmatico di un giudizio, rifuggire la dissertazione altezzosa e stroncante rivelano una prudente diffidenza verso “la sicurezza di quanti ignorano il dubbio”. Questo scetticismo, lungi dal rappresentare meramente una peculiarità del suo stile, discende da una concezione agnostica della realtà (e perfino della irrealtà) che – paradosso istruttivo – andò accentuandosi man mano che aumentava il suo sapere.

*

Se, come asseriva Pezzoni, quello di Borges è un percorso difficilissimo da seguire per quanti vengono dopo di lui, ciò è dovuto al fatto che la sua genesi parte da una struttura così personale che il riprodurla risulta quasi impossibile. Basterebbe riguardare alcune delle domande che gli rivolgevano di solito i giornalisti, e che ovviamente non poteva prevedere, per notare la piega imprevedibile delle sue risposte immediate e spontanee. Quando gli chiedevano un’opinione sul Papa, poteva rispondere immediatamente “è un funzionario di cui non mi interesso”, riuscendo così non solo a sventare il tentativo di strappargli un giudizio etico ma anche a sottolineare il carattere burocratico dell’istituzione ecclesiastica (nomine, promozioni, trasferimenti, grado gerarchico), tanto distante dalla discussione metafisica e teologica che lo interessava. Una volta cercarono di fargli esprimere la sua opinione, senza dubbio ben nota, sulla figura di Perón. Prima che il cronista avesse finito di parlare, Borges dichiarò: “Non mi sono mai curato dei milionari”, mandando così all’aria il piano ideologico della domanda, oltre a conferire al personaggio una connotazione di disinvolta corruzione.

*

Interpellato in merito alla censura, rispose rapidamente che “spesso ha contribuito a stimolare la metafora” e aggiunse l’esempio di libri che riuscirono a eludere la sorveglianza dei censori mediante il cambio dei nomi o l’appello al simbolismo.

*

Si potrebbe argomentare che, per quanto le risposte di Borges fossero istantanee, poggiavano su convincimenti originari e, pertanto, non rappresentavano una battuta improvvisa. Ad ogni modo, resta notevole la definizione del papato come una burocrazia; quella di Perón, tramutato da politico a magnate; e quella della censura, a suo avviso efficace promotrice della metafora e dell’impiego dei simboli. Tutto ciò sottolinea oltre la prontezza e l’opportunismo con cui individuava quei “convincimenti originari”, la sferzante ironia davanti a uditori abituati a uomini pubblici la cui opinione di solito oscillava tra la solennità e il patetismo.

*

L’oratoria sintetica e il taglio inatteso delle sue risposte non sono diversi quando caratterizza Amleto come ��…il dandy epigrammatico e vestito a lutto della corte di Danimarca…”; definisce (con fini ossimori) Martínez Estrada “uno scrittore dalle splendide amarezze” e Ray Bradbury autore “dai dilettevoli terrori”; ci avvisa che, con il trascorrere del tempo, qualsiasi ricordo diventa “circoscritto e sbiadito…”; o si insospettisce di fronte a “una poesia che sembrava estendere all’infinito le possibilità della cacofonia e del caos…”.

*

A casa sua, di ritorno da un pranzo, mi chiese di leggere, in un foglio piegato sopra la tavola della sala, una nota a matita che senz’altro si era fatto trascrivere. Diceva: “Non ero tanto illetterato da non poter scrivere un sonetto, né tanto incauto da scriverne due”. Quando terminai la mia lettura a voce alta, mi disse: “Sa di chi é? Di Baltasar Gracián. Non lo trova straordinario? Potrebbe essere benissimo di Bernard Shaw o di Wilde”. In quel momento pensai che, se non fosse stata scritta nello spagnolo del XVII secolo, quell’ironia, quella forte litote, sarebbe stata degna della paternità di Borges, il quale, non a caso, la ricordava e chiedeva che gliela ripetessero nonostante il suo noto disdegno per la prosa di Gracián.

*

Rigore etimologico, intertestualità, erudizione, chiarezza strutturale, metonimia, litote, precisione del lessico, polivalenza verbale e magia urbana sono alcune delle cifre che contraddistinguono la scrittura di Borges e, per il fatto di essere intrinseche alla sua personalità, non si possono riprodurre in assenza di un analogo vissuto esperienziale. Per emulare Borges bisognerebbe cercare di assomigliargli in tutto. Qualcosa di simile pensò (e poi escluse) Pierre Menard quando voleva scrivere come Cervantes.

Félix della Paolera

*Il testo è tratto da “Borges: develaciones” (Fundación E. Costantini, 1999), da cui si è scelto il capitolo “Alcances de su influencia”; la traduzione italiana è di Marianna Marchi

L'articolo “Amleto? Un dandy epigrammatico vestito a lutto”. Borges, l’inimitabile. Un ricordo di Félix della Paolera proviene da Pangea.

from pangea.news https://ift.tt/2BV21Kq

[doomedandstoned]

Doomy Fuzz Rockers LáGoon Cut Loose Scuzzy New Spin!

~Doomed & Stoned Debuts~

"Worship riffs, spliffs, and flip tricks." Having met the rowdy riffers from Portland, Oregon, at a Doomed & Stoned Presents show at World Famous Kenton Club, I can attest that the attitude is woven into the fabric of every song they write and perform. LáGoon strikes me as kind of an odd duck, with the head of The Stooges, the fuzzed up body of Dead Moon, the feet of The Gun Club, the soul of Electric Wizard and the guts of Nirvana...with a skateboard under wing. However you pitch it, this is nasty, nasty business.

It's exactly this sort of strangeness the scene needs as our hunger for heavy music of the slow 'n' low variety continues to loom large. Here is a band that will take your appetite and then gobble you up before it's all said and done. LáGoon is steadily garnering a cult following, with a few records -- last year's L’affaire des Poisons and Grim Ripper -- already notched on the belt.

Ashlee Boone Photography

"Brady and I met in college in Montana gigging in separate bands," Anthony Gaglia tells Doomed & Stoned, speaking of drummer Brady Maurer. "We both moved to Portland after graduation, and shortly after starting jamming together, and LáGoon was born."

While I had Anthony's attention, I needed to know: What's the deal with the moniker "LáGoon"?   "There’s isn’t any great story behind our name. There’s an old French B-list film called Lá Horde and I’ve always loved the original title art. I wanted to make some sort of play on French/English words featuring "Lá" so I decided to go with LáGoon." Works for me.

On March 4th, LáGoon drops a brand new full-length, 'The Unwelcome' (2019) via Forbidden Place Records. Fans are already noticing the material on this spin seems a lot darker, grittier somehow. "This album is a step back to our roots of being DIY Skate rats," the band tells me. "We recorded, mixed, and mastered the entire album ourselves. It has a raw feel throughout and that’s what we are all about. We both grew up getting dirty as hell at the skate park and listening to metal all day. If everything sounded crystal clear it just wouldn’t be us."

The standout track here for many listeners is bound to be "Worship The Van," with that wicked hook of a riff that just can't be repeated enough for my taste. The single dropped last week and it's bound to become a new anthem for road warriors everywhere. If you were a fan of that number, I think you're going to really dig the other nine on the record. At least Kyle did. I can't help but sample from this listener's Bandcamp review: "Dudes sound like Fu Manchu on 21.666 rpm. Shit is nasty, heavy, fuzzy, scuzzy. Get in the van...man."

All aboard, then? Hell, yeah! Let's ride.

Forbidden Place Records will be issuing LáGoon's The Unwelcome on vinyl, cassette, and compact disc (pre-orders will manifest soon on the label's website). And now, Doomed & Stoned is pleased to premiere the album in its entirety, ahead of its Monday release.

Give ear...

The Unwelcome by LáGoon

Track By Track

A Listener's Guide to 'The Unwelcome'

  By Anthony Gaglia of LáGoon

The Unwelcome is an ode to skateboards across the world getting kicked out of skate spots everyday. We’re welcome very few places, the struggle is real.

Wheel Bite is another skate tune about one of every skaters worst nightmares, wheel bite.

The Thirst is based on and 80s horror film by the same name. The film is about lovers, vampires, and the thirst that accompanies both.

Worship the Van was written for our trusty Astro Van. It’s something Brady and I started saying when our van kept breaking down last tour. Every van owner knows that a certain level of worship goes into maintaining a Van.

Chop City is a song about mixing tobacco and weed. When I was in college we took bong rips that were half tobacco half weed, and we called them choppers. It fucks you right up. It’s the most upbeat track on the record for that reason.

Last Hex is probably the most ‘doom’ song we have. The song is about death. The last hex that takes over everyone.

Alligator (In Your Head) is about paranoia, anxiety, and depression and the way it sneaks up on you, similar to an alligator attacking its prey.

Live Through Death is a story of two lovers that first meet at the gates of hell. Once they realize their lives have come to, they beg the devil to let them live through their deaths.

Adieu, Desierto is a farewell to the listener. Inspired by the classical works of Francisco Tárrega and Astor Piazzolla.

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[newsintheshell]

Dynit, i dettagli sull’edizione definitiva di “Akira”

Il cofanetto commemorativo del cult di Katshuiro Otomo sarà disponibile dal 7 novembre.  

Dopo il successo riscosso al cinema per i trent’anni dall’uscita di “Akira”, arriva finalmente l'edizione commemorativa di uno dei lungometraggi di animazione più famosi e visionari di tutti i tempi: un’opera che ha fatto la storia del fumetto e dell’animazione giapponese, ora disponibile con un nuovo doppiaggio italiano, fedele alla versione originale.

Tratto dall’omonimo manga di Katsuhiro Otomo, edito in Italia da Planet Manga, Akira fu realizzato con il supporto dell’autore, che ne curò la regia senza mai staccarsi dalla sua postazione di lavoro e creando un’opera che rappresenta un pezzo di storia della fantascienza. Si occupò di tutto: dall’elaborazione del layout alle correzioni dei disegni chiave, sino a quando nel 1988 il film, con la memorabile colonna sonora di Shoji Yamashiro, arrivò finalmente nelle sale conquistando milioni di fan in tutto il mondo e sbancando letteralmente il botteghino con oltre 50 milioni di dollari incassati.

Anno 2019: le grandi metropoli sono state spazzate via dopo la Terza Guerra Mondiale. Tokyo è teatro di scontri tra bande di motociclisti, tra queste di distingue la gang dei giovani Kaneda e Tetsuo. La polizia segreta cerca di mettere un freno alla minaccia per poter continuare lo sviluppo del segretissimo progetto Akira.

Dal 7 novembre di quest’anno sarà dunque disponibile la steelbook combo Blu-ray e DVD contente un booklet di 12 pagine, trailer e spot, oltre che una seconda traccia audio, con il doppiaggio storico italiano. Il cofanetto è già preordinabile su Amazon al prezzo di 24,99 €.

L’audio nel Blu-ray sarà in dts-HD Master Audio 5.1, mentre nel DVD Dolby Digital 5.1, ad esclusione della vecchia traccia italiana che sarà in 2.0.

Per chi è in cerca dell’edizione definitiva, dallo stesso giorno sarà acquistabile anche un box set molto speciale, esclusivo dei Dynit Selected Store, che aggiungerà alla già citata steelbook il libro Akira Dossier di 48 pagine, una maxi cartolina, la riproduzione delle tre locandine cinematografiche e 2 vinili rimasterizzati 180 GR - SD11.2MHz con la colonna sonora.

Di seguito la tracklist dell’Akira Symphonic Suite:

KANEDA

BATTLE AGAINST CLOWN

TETSUO

SHOHMYOH

DOLL’S POLYPHONY

EXODUS FROM THE

UNDERGROUND FORTRESS

WINDS OVER NEO-TOKYO

ILLUSION

MUTATION

REQUIEM

Il nuovo doppiaggio è stato diretto da Stefano Santerini con l’assistenza dei fonici Gabriele Castaldi e Mauro Lopez (mix). La traduzione è a cura di Ruben Baita e i dialoghi italiani sono stati adattati da Lina Zargani. Il nuovo cast di interpreti è il seguente:

KANEDA: Manuel Meli

TETSUO: Alessio Puccio

SHIKISHIMA: Pierluigi Astore

DOTT ONISHI: Gaetano Lizzio

KEI: Emanuela Damasio

KAI: Alessio De Filippis          

KIYOKO: Giorgia Venditti          

YAMAGATA: Alessandro Campaiola

RYU: Alberto Bognanni                  

MASARU: Giulio Bartolomei      

TAKASHI: Alex Santerini

NEZU: Pieraldo Ferrante

KAORI: Jessica Bologna  

SilenziO)))

[FONTE]

[eugeniocaruso]

JAMES DUKE, IMPRENDITORE DEL TABACCO E DELL'ELETTRICITA E GRANDE MECENATE. http://www.impresaoggi.com/it2/2431-james_buchanan_duke_industriale_del_tabacco_e_grande_mecenate_usa/ Giova osservare che quasi tutti i grandissimi imprenditori USA furono anche grandissimi mecenati e che il loro nome più che associato alle imprese è legato ai loro lasciti testamentari in favore dell'umanità. Essi non solo hanno fatto grande l'America ma hanno gettato i semi della cultura statunitense. Le grandi dinastie del capitalismo americano: gli Astor, i Carnegie, i Mellon, i Frick, i Rockefeller, i Merrill, i Vanderbilt, i Morgan, i Guggenheim, i Walton, i Disney, i Cargill, i Bloomberg, i Giannini, i Johnson, gli Huntington, gli Stanford, gli Hopkins, gli Yale, i Duke, i Cornell (alla Cornell University nel 1970 fu per la prima volta, negli usa, ammessa una donna), gli Harward, i Mudd vedono nella filantropia culturale una forma di restituzione (give back) alla comunità di parte di ciò che essi hanno ricevuto da essa. https://www.instagram.com/p/CpVNC_Pjt8y/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[scpzookeepers]

Interview

“Good morning, Captain. How are you feeling today?” I don’t know you. Who are you? What do you want? “I’m just here to talk. Doctor Astor called us. She said we might be able to help you get better.” Get better? “Yes, Captain...do you mind if I call you by your first name?” Whats yours? “I’m Kara. May I call you Doug?” Sure. “Thank you, Doug. Doctor Astor told me a little bit about you. She said you had some trouble adjusting to life in Afghanistan.” THATS NOT WHAT HAPPENED! I’M NOT CRAZY! I’M NOT FU- “Doug. I know you’re not crazy.” I’M NOT  you what? “I don’t think you’re crazy, Doug. I think you saw something horrible, and that experience changed you.” The others wouldn’t listen to me. They said I was seeing things, hearing things. They told me I needed drugs, that what I saw wasn’t real. “And did you believe them?” No...not at first. It seemed so real. I saw it with my own eyes. But...now I’m not so sure...they said it couldn’t be real.” “Would it make you feel better if I told you it wasn’t real?” No. No it wouldn’t. “Would it make you feel better if I told you was real?” ...No. No it wouldn’t. “Why not?” Because...because if its real, then its not just something I see in my nightmares. Its not something I see when the lights go out, or the drugs wear off. If you tell me its real, that means other people can see it... “Others have.” What do you mean? “I mean, after you left that cave, other people reported seeing the same thing. They all described the same things. Some of them are dead, some of them by their own hand. Some of them are alive, and they’re locked in boxes like you are right now, and they’ll never get out.” So why are you here? “You have an impressive record, Doug. And not just your military record. You survived an abusive childhood at the hands of a neglectful drug-addicted mother and an alcoholic father.  Records from school show you were a bright kid but lacked challenging material so your grades weren’t great but your teachers spoke highly of you. You joined the military at 17 during the height of the war on terror, you had a generic yet impressive enlisted service, infantry, sniper, Ranger, Special Forces, 5 deployments to Iraq and Afghanistan including 2 after attending Officer Candidate School. Your ODA saw a lot of action your last trip. You got a Purple Heart, twice. Bronze Star.” Why the fuck are you here? How do you know so much about me? Who are you? “Doug. I’m here because of what you saw, and how you reacted to it. See, most people who saw...what you saw...died by their own hand immediately. They didn’t make it out of that cave. They didn’t get their team back to base, they didn’t get the chance to report in, they never made it to a psychologist who told them that what they saw was impossible and couldn’t be real and was the product of a PTSD episode because you got your asses kicked by a bunch of...well. The point is, you saw that, and you managed to keep yourself in control just long enough to be told you were insane.” Who are you? What do you want from me?! “I work for a private organization thats very interested in the thing you saw. I’m here to offer you two things: A job, and a way out of this box.”